monster394

[monster394]

I absolutely detest my job. It is a daily reminder of the 25 years I have wasted. A daily kick in the ass of how little they appreciate me, and a constant reminder of just how insignificant I am. My family and my son more important should use me as a reminder of how not to live their life. No wonder my parents were embarrassed by me. Fuck my life and shitty existence.

[monster394]

Big day today. Happy Saturday everyone. Today my son is taking his test for his black belt in taekwondo. This is such a big deal for him and I am more nervous and agitated than he is. I love to see the result of all the kicks and punches, squats and sit ups, all of the yes sir and yes ma'am. I am so proud that he got to this point. Starting out on this journey that is only just beginning, I was only aiming for something that would teach him a good work ethic and provide discipline. Never in a million years did I ever think this would be his passion and the love he would find for it. Watching him improve and sweat and work for this has been a privilege, and I can't express how proud I am. I find it tough to talk about without tearing up, that this premature baby who was born extremely early and undersized would keep fighting long after he fought to survive and stay alive. I will keep you updated when it's all over. I have a billion pictures to take.

[monster394]

“Never forget how far you’ve come. Everything you have gotten through. All the times you have pushed on even when you felt you couldn’t. All the mornings you got out of bed no matter how hard it was. All the times you wanted to give up but you got through another day. Never forget how much strength you have learned and developed along the way.”

— Unknown

[monster394]

This is gospel truth. Most of us kee0 the same cancer around us and wonder why we are sick.

[monster394]

“Intimacy makes you feel unique. Intimacy makes you feel as though you have been singled out, that someone in the world believes you have special qualities that nobody else has.”

— Heather O'Neill

[monster394]

Hello everybody. Been MIA for a while. Family issues and mental health and what not. Just wanted to tell everyone I will be back soon and to have an amazing Christmas.

[monster394]

Just feeling so dead inside. I'm so completely and utterly miserable. If it weren't for my son I am afraid of what I would do. I am such a complete and total waste of DNA and space. I hate me.

[monster394]

This is 100 percent Gospel Truth.

“Some of the most poisonous people come disguised as friends and family.”

— Unknown

[monster394]

"There is this terrible desire to be loved, and then this horrible yearning to be remembered. As god would have it, I can fulfil but one."

[monster394]

Love this. Well said

we were meant to live slowly!!!! we were meant to savor moments and feel unabashedly lazy and frolic and smell the flowers and laugh with our entire hearts and love with our entire souls!!!!! don’t ever feel guilty for resting!!!!!! don’t ever feel guilty for slowing down!!!!!! enjoying life shouldn’t be something you’re ashamed of

[monster394]

This hits home for me lol. Always under the impression people are watching and mocking.

[monster394]

So true.

[monster394]

[monster394]

"Was insanity just a matter of dropping the act?"- Susanna Kaysen girl interrupted

[monster394]

The day hits me and I immediately feel it

My world around me in chaos and sadness

My stomach in knots

I cant deal today

Everything inside hurts my head spinning

I need to be alone and away

In a small dark space

But then I remember

My existence is a small...dark....place...

I exist to disolve

Everything about me is falling apart

[monster394]

Here he comes

Clad in all jet black

Complete with a half black and half white top hat

Carrying a pair of butcher knives

A slight smile as he comes towards me

He knows my fears

He knows my dreams

His face is a swirly mix of red and black

He loves my pain

He creates the black raincloud above mr

He is the shadow in the darkness

Stronger than death and meaner than life

He is the demon in my dreams

And the monster under my bed

He is a reflection of my love and hate and hope and fate

Only love can defeat him

I.....am.....doomed

[monster394]

Hope is the dawn that banishes the shadows, promising a new day filled with limitless possibilities.