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[neverbacksdown7476]

To everyone who has sent me requests! I promise they are in progress. Work is crazy so I don’t have a lot of time but I will get to them I promise!!

[neverbacksdown7476]

[neverbacksdown7476]

WARNING!!!!

People, please be careful. There are also people tracking children and people and putting bids on them based on their profile pictures on whatsapp, tracking and kidnapping them. Especially young children, so please be cautious, especially parents who have their children as their profile pictures.

Please pass this on to everyone so that they are aware of the danger. I don’t how it is all around the world but I know it can’t just be here so please please spread the word. Thank you.

[neverbacksdown7476]

                                             Lucifer & smiling ~

[neverbacksdown7476]

“Can I request 27 and 34 with Crowley please?” - @scarletsoldierrr​

Pairing: Crowley x Reader

Rating: PG-13 (I guess)

Prompt: 27) Love. Hate. Such a thin line. & 34) You’re mine and I don’t share. (Prompt list found here)

Word Count: 1788

11:55...

It had been a long day, but an even longer night. The idea of tomorrow being better wasn’t looking promising as you watch the clock on the wall tick closer to midnight.

11:56…

You sat on a bar stool in an old dive bar, one that was old, rundown, and not very clean. An old man with a bushy white beard at the other end of the bar who looked like he hadn’t moved from that spot since noon. There was another old man who sat at a booth in the front of the bar, he had just gotten there but from the look of the wallet sitting on his table it was payday and he would be there for a while. By the jukebox there was an older lady, an off duty lot lizard, casually dancing to the beat of ‘Hotel California.’ In the back corner booth there was a couple, probably in their mid-thirties, who clearly didn’t belong. The bartender looked to be in his late thirties or early forties, cleaning whiskey glasses.

You, unlike the couple in the back, looked like you belonged there. With your black eye, split lip, busted knuckles you were a sight for sore eyes. You also had bruised ribs, and what was hopefully only a twisted ankle. Though you were almost positive nothing was broken, or permanently damaged, you still hadn’t moved in about an hour. So you sat drinking whiskey, hoping to dull the pain soon.

You pulled the glass of whiskey to your lips, finishing off what was left in the glass. Lifting your hand to get the bartender's attention, you pointed to your glass requesting a refill. He set down the glass he had been cleaning for the last 12 minutes, threw the rag over his shoulder, and walked over to you to refill the glass as you requested.

“You look worse for wear, can I ask what happened?” He asked, leaning against the bar.

“You can, but I probably won’t answer.” You said looking at him over the rim of the glass. The bartender was in his late thirties or early forties, he had an attractive face. You wondered how he ended up working in a place like this.

“Come on, humor me,”

“Go talk to Santa down there.” You nodded your head to the man at the other end of the bar.

“I’m assuming you are better company than he is.”

“You shouldn’t judge a book by its cover.”

“I tell you what, the next drink is on me. All you have to do is have a little conversation with me.” He bargained, you glared at him for a moment, trying to get him to catch the hint and leave, but he wouldn’t.

“Fine.” You sighed, as you drank the whiskey that was in your glass which allowed him to give you another refill, before finally speaking again. “I got into a fight.”

“I kind of figured that, but why.”

“It’s actually… part of my job.” You hesitated for a moment trying to come up with a lie. Coming up with lies on the fly like that, so it was always best to stick as close to the truth as possible. There is no close lie to your truth though. No fancy way to say that 13 years ago you sold your soul to a demon named Lillith, but when she was killed your contract was taken over by Crowley.

Crowley rather liked owning the soul of a hunter, so as long as you worked for him, he wouldn’t call in your debt. That’s how it all started at least. So a couple of times a month he would come to you with a job fulfilling the wishes of other people who sold their souls to him. It ranged all the way from providing an alibi to get someone off the hook, to killing someone for a blood thirsty coward too afraid to get their own hands dirty. When you weren’t working for Crowley you were hunting almost non-stop. You thought saving as many people as possible could maybe make up for working for a demon. Maybe it would just make up for all the bad.

“What are you a cage fighter or something?”

“Or something.” You told him. Tonight was teaching a cracked out man who had been abusing his wife a lesson, and helping the wife start a new life. Though sometimes it was a shit way to live, sometimes you got a little satisfaction out of it. “Don’t worry, the other guy looks a lot worse than I do.”

“A girl who knows how to handle herself, that’s kind of hot.” The bartender leaned closer to you, nearly across the bar. A small grin betrayed your face. Even if you weren’t interested in the guy, the attention was kind of nice.

“Well appreciate it while you can, I’m leaving after this drink.”

“Where are you going to go?”

“I’m not entirely sure yet.” That was the truth, there weren’t a lot of motels around, which is why you were at the bar in the first place.

“I close up in a couple of hours, you could always come home with me.” He offered, and you let out a sort of laugh.

“Are you in the business of taking strange women home?”

“As long as you promise not to be a serial killer.”

“Oh God, is this how humans flirt?” A gruff voice, with a british accent came from beside you all of a sudden. You looked out of the corner of your eye to see Crowley now sitting beside you. Though you were calm about his arrival, the bartender almost jumped out of his skin.

“Who the hell are you?” The bartender asked, but you had a different question.

“What are you doing here?”

“You didn’t check in, so I came to find you.”

“You don’t have to check up on me all the time.”

“Obviously I do.” Crowley and you argued back and forth

“Can you tell me what is going on?” The bartender asked you, but you were officially tired of talking. So you finished the drink that was in front of you, and you jumped up.

“Thanks for the drink.” You said throwing cash on the counter for the drinks you got earlier, and walked out of the bar with long strides filled with confidence. It wasn’t until you were outside that you gave into the pain of your twisted ankle and limped straight to your car.

You only had to drive about 30 miles before finding a motel that looked clean enough for your standards. You got the room in the very back of the motel, first floor, just outside her window was an alley. All the variables for a clean and easy getaway if necessary.

1:24…

The new day began, and all you wanted to do was lay down to sleep. You flopped down onto the cheap motel bed, laying on your stomach and your face buried in the pillow. You kicked your boots off onto the ground, each of them making a soft ‘thud’ as they hit the floor. You hadn’t bothered to take anything else off though, too drained to even care if you slept in your jeans. However, as you began to drift to sleep you were jolted awake by a voice that probably shouldn’t have been in your room.

“Well don’t you look cozy.” You turned your head to look at the man sitting in the chair next to your bed.

“Crowley, it’s late, can’t we do whatever this is tomorrow?” You mumbled

“Well, I figured you might be back at the bar tomorrow, I would hate to interrupt you.” His voice was so soothing, even if he was being oh so annoying at the moment. You pushed yourself to a sitting position, and stared at him with tired eyes.

“What are you talking about?” You asked

“That bartender you were so chummy with.” Crowley rose to his feet pacing slowly through the room, his hands buried deep in his jacket pockets.

“The bartender…?” You started in confusion then saw the look he was giving you out of the corner of his eye. He was trying to hide it but you could see anger mixed with something. It took a moment to place it but when you finally figured it you couldn’t hold in the laughter. “You’re jealous?”

He fully faced you now, then strolled over to you. He stood right in front of you, and you looked up at him. He pulled one hand out of his pocket, reaching out he cupped her cheek. The two of you locked eyes for a moment, before a teasing grin crossed your lips.

“There is no need to be jealous, I have room for two men in my life.” You teased. Crowley caught onto the game you were playing quickly, and a snarky grin played on his lips. You both knew all too well you were not anywhere near interested in the bartender.

“I don’t think so.” He leaned down so he was at eye level with you. His hand moved from your cheek to the back of your head, his fingers tangling gently in your hair.

“And why is that?”

“Because you’re mine, and I don’t share.” He pulled you closer, pressing his lips to yours. The kiss was rough, but sweet in a somewhat passionate way, and you were more than happy to return the kiss for a moment. You wrapped one arm around his neck pulling him closer, your other hand resting on his cheek. His teeth scraped against your lower lip, you winced, and pulled away quickly. A finger rested on the cut on your lip, but the finger wasn’t yours.

“Was the job that bad?”

“Not at all, I rather enjoyed putting the beat down on a wife beater.” You grinned, running your thumb along the stubble on his cheek. “Of course, the man was twice my size, it probably would have been easier for a demon to do that job for you.”

“A demon wouldn’t have looked as good doing it though.” Crowley pressed his lips on your eyebrow, gently as to not irritate your black eye. Next he kissed your knuckles, then your ribs, and finally it was back to your lips.

“You know, an Angel would be able to just heal me.” You mumbled between kisses

“Yes, but this is so much more fun.” He kissed you again, silencing you for just a moment, before you mumbled again.

“God I hate you sometimes.”

“It felt a lot like love to me.”

“Love. Hate. Such a thin line.” You grinned, as he kissed you again, silencing you for good this time.

[neverbacksdown7476]

Thank you

[neverbacksdown7476]

I couldn't decide between 31 and 41 for Rafael Barba... so I guess I'll ask if either one particularly inspires you?

Pairing: Rafael Barba x Reader

Rating: PG

Prompt: 31) This is literally the worst idea I have ever heard & 41) Make a wish (Prompt list found here)

Word Count: 1147

“This is literally the worst idea I have ever heard.” Rafael said once again reiterating his point for the hundredth time today.

“I can’t believe you’ve never been ice skating before.” You chuckled. He had a worried look sprawled across his face as he stared at the brown ice skates.

“I’ve never felt the need to before, it seems dangerous to glide around a frozen lake with blades on our feet.” He mumbled, wondering if he could get out of it if he sulked enough.

“Well it’s my birthday, and you said we could do anything I wanted.” You reminded him, earning a side glance from Rafael

“That’s when I thought you would want to go to dinner and a movie.”

“Rafa, come on please.” You begged him one more time puffing out your bottom lip with an obvious fake pout. One that he fell for each and every time.

“Alright, alright, but for my birthday we are going skiing.”

“Because that is so much more safe than ice skating?” You asked, but the only response you received was his signature cocky grin. It didn’t matter though, because he was finally putting on the ice skates. Part of you felt bad for pulling him so far out of his comfort zone, but your heart melted just a little about the fact he was willing to do this for you. He was willing to put on those skates, wobble over to the ice rink, and take his first risky step onto the ice. All for you. 

White Christmas lights were hung on every tree surrounding the ice rink. The wind was blowing gently, but hard enough to leave both your and Rafael’s cheeks red from the chill. All around you there were people; some skating with ease, some falling on their butts, some clinging to the side for dear life. The sounds of laughter filled the air, and overwhelmed the noise of casual conversation. It was calm, and oh so romantic.

“Here.” You took his hand in yours to help steady him out. You were moving like you had done this a million times, even though your job didn’t allow for it very often. Rafael on the other hand was slipping, and sliding struggling to find his footing. It was strange to see this confident if not arrogant man struggle so hard to get a hang of something you figured he would have been a natural.

“This is a lot harder than some people make it look.”

“Like that 8 year old?” You asked sarcastically motioning to the young boy who just whizzed by the two of you with ease.

“That kid is at least 10,” he defended himself with a cocky grin, even though it wouldn’t help make his case.

“If it will make you feel better.”

“Much.” You laughed squeezing his hand tighter pulling him along the ice as you went. It didn’t take him long to finally get the hang of it, learning to push against the ice and sway so casually, and damn if he didn’t look good doing it. There were parts of you wanting to speed up, test his skill and see what he was capable of. Instead you swung in front of him, and started skating backwards.

“You make me nervous doing that.” Rafael said as he reached his other hand up to hold your other hand.

“I used to love the winter Olympics, as a little kid I thought it was way better than the regular Olympics.” You started and Rafael raised an eyebrow in confusion, but was curious where you were going with this. “The snow boarding, the different kinds of skiing, but my favorite was figure skating. It was just so elegant, and I thought I was going to become a professional figure skater. So I used to make my dad bring me here every chance we got. My dad was so bad, even after all the times we came. When I went to college we still managed to come at least once every time I came home.”

“So you brought me here to practice for your dream job?” Rafael’s grin widened as you laughed.

“I wish. I just miss how free I feel on the ice, how relaxing it is.” You said, swinging back to his side. The two of you made a few laps around the ring, before he finally tugged on your hand.

“Come on.” Rafael finally spoke snapping you out of whatever trance the scenery had on you.

“You’re ready to go already? You didn’t even fall yet.” You teased, but allowed him to pull you off of the ice. The two of you changed back into your normal shoes. He had you interlock your arm with his, and started walking.

“Hey, home is the other way, where are we going?” You looked over your shoulder.

“Your birthday isn’t over yet, mi alma.” Mi alma, was his pet name for you which he claimed to mean my soul. You didn’t have to walk far for where he was taking you, after all it was a smart business decision to open a coffee shop near the ice rink. “What do you want?”

“Hot chocolate.” Rafael looked at the man behind the counter and held up two fingers. Rafael set a few dollars cash on the counter in exchange for the two cups. “Thank you.” You mumbled taking the cup the heat was nice against her frigid fingers.

“You aren’t going to drink that until it gets cold, are you?” Rafael asked

“I don’t want to burn my mouth.” You defended

“You know it’s called hot chocolate for a reason.” He chuckled, leading you to the river.

“It’s good no matter what, and it keeps my hands warm better than chocolate milk.” You leaned your hip against the railing, your body turned Rafael, but you turned your head to look at the lights from the New Jersey skyline reflecting off the water.

“Hey,” Rafael rested his hand on your cheek, and pulled your attention to him, his thumb running under your eye. Pulling his hand away he showed you an eyelash that was on the lip of his finger. “Make a wish.” You made a face like you were thinking; pursing your lips, squinting your eyes, tilting your head, and putting your index finger on your chin. Opening one eye to look at him you smiled, then blew the eyelash off his finger. 

“What did you wish for?” Rafael snaked his arm around your waist pulling you as close to him as he possibly could.

“If I tell you you have to promise you’ll make it come true.” You leaned forward pressing your forehead against his.

“Anything for you, mi alma.”

“I wished that every birthday could be as good as this one.”

“Well, then you wasted a wish on something I already planned on doing.”

Tag List:

@scarletsoldierrr

[neverbacksdown7476]

Writing Prompts

Send me a number and a character. (Fandoms and characters in the tags.)

“Wow… You are beautiful.”

“You have terrible timing.”

“Just leave me alone.”

“I’m going to kill him”

“I can handle it on my own.”

“You have got to be kidding me.”

“After all this time I’m still not over you.”

“Damn, you are so hot when you are mad.”

“I wish we could stay like this forever.”

“Please, don’t say it.”

“Who the hell are you?”

“Remember when we were kids?”

“Don’t go.”

“Are you an idiot?”

“I was not prepared for this.”

“God, what happened to you?”

“It’s time to get up.”

“This is going to hurt.”

“Damn it! Don’t sneak up on me!”

“What could go wrong?”

“Just shut up and kiss me.”

“If you love me let me go.”

“It’ll be okay”

“I can’t believe we just did that.”

“I already regret this.”

“I thought you were dead.”

“Love. Hate. Such a thin line.”

“What are you doing here.”

“That’s my girl.”

“What is wrong with you?”

“This is literally the worst idea I have ever heard.”

“Nobody can take your place.”

“Are you trying to ask me out?”

“You’re mine, and I don’t share.”

“Will you, please, just fuck off?”

“Why are you so nice to me?”

“Did I die?”

“I am way too sober for this.”

“I admire your courage”

“Fancy seeing you here.”

“Make a wish.”

“Don’t tempt me.”

“That’s what they all say.”

“Make me.”

“I love you”

“I don’t want your help.”

“Don’t give up on me. Not yet.”

“I will never hurt you.”

“Maybe we weren’t meant to be.”

“Don’t touch me!”

[neverbacksdown7476]

The day the my world fell apart…

[neverbacksdown7476]

Don’t Say It (Part 7)

Warnings: Angst, maybe some fluff

Part 6

“I could meet you for lunch if you want, or we could go for drinks after work.” Sonny said walking with you towards the D.A.’s office building. It was your first day back to work since your brother had been arrested, the trial hadn’t started yet, and Barba wanted you to wait until after the trial to come back. However, your savings were dipping, and you needed the paycheck. More importantly, you just needed to get out of the damn house.

“Sonny, I love you, and I appreciate everything you’ve done for me, but I need my space.” You said looking at him out of the corner of your eye. Even though you were constantly telling him you were fine, he didn’t quite believe you. He still hadn’t left your side, even gone as far as sleeping on your couch. You finally convinced him it was time to go home, and it was obviously making him nervous.

“Alright, alright.” Sonny backed off, but stared at you for a moment longer.

“Go to work, I’ll be fine.” You shooed him away, walking off yourself before anything else could be said.

You walk the halls of your place of work, the halls that seemed to grow longer and longer by the second. It seemed like everyone’s eyes were burning into you. It just dawned on you, this was the first time you had been alone since Barba found out about the threats that were being made against you. The first time you had been alone for a long time. Now you were surrounded by your co-workers, other attorneys, and some cops, and some civilians. It felt like they were either judging you because of your brother, or marking you for the future. As fear settled over you, your chest began to feel so heavy that breathing became a chore. There was nothing you could do, except tighten your grip on your suitcase, and put one foot in front of the other. Just keep moving forward, ignore the looks, ignore the whispers, and try so desperately to ignore the world that seemed to be closing in around you.

Making your way to desk that was nestled in the basement of the building, in the far corner. There were other desks around, and like you it belonged to brand new A.D.A’s. The bosses had to at least know your name for you to get a good desk, you have to be good at your job to get an office, and you have to be really damn good to get an office like Barba has. Your desk was dull, void of life, and pretty much empty. You barely went to your own desk, doing most of your work in Barba’s office, or in courthouse meeting rooms. The faces of the people around you were unfamiliar, even though you all probably started around the same time.

Trying to keep to yourself, you avoided their wandering eyes, and sat down at your desk. A desk you hadn’t been at in so long there was actually dust on it, which flew up as you put your suitcase on the desktop. Popping open the suitcase and pulling out your files, you started doing the scutt work you had been putting off for some time now.

No matter how hard you tried to ignore the eyes on you, you just couldn’t. Your heart was beating so hard in your chest that you could almost hear it. In the heat of the moment you decided to face your fears, instead of running from them. Looking up with a loud huff you slammed your pen down on the stack of papers in front of you. Most everyone had the decency to look away, and pretend they hadn’t even noticed you. 

Everyone except the man who was sitting at the desk across from yours. He had short, buzzed, brown hair, green eyes, and tanned skin. He was probably in his early to mid-thirties. He leaned back in his chair, staring at you. Studying you. He didn’t back down not even when you made eye contact. Suddenly you wished you hadn’t been so brave and just ignored everyone, because this was a nightmare.

“Can I help you?” You finally asked going against every fiber of your being, and not backing down.

“I was just curious about the person who sat at that desk.” He responded with a cocky smirk. You couldn’t help but wonder if all lawyers were so arrogant. “It had been empty for so long we thought it was reserved for an old A.D.A. who died or something.”

“Is that so? Well, sorry to disappoint, it’s mine.” You tried to go back to your work, but the man across from you kept talking.

“Come on, who’s ass did you have to kiss to get a position that keeps you away from the lacky room so much?”

“I’m sorry the ‘lacky room’?” You asked out of curiosity.

“Yes, the lacky room. For all of us brand new A.D.A.s who do nothing but scutt work, and low profile things that no one else wants to do.” The man explained finally leaning forward. He rested his elbows on his desk, interlocked his fingers together, and rested his chin on those interlocked fingers. “So, who’s ass did you have to kiss?” He repeated

“I didn’t kiss anyone’s ass, I’m just good at what I do.” You replied to him with a snarky tone.

“Oh come on, we’ve seen you on the news, working some high profile cases. We assumed you were new because no one had heard of you before that, we just thought you transferred in from another borough. However, with you sitting at that desk means you are just as new as the rest of us.”

“You’ve seen me on the news, only because I was standing next to the A.D.A. who is training me. I don’t actually do anything all that important.”

“No, we haven’t done anything important. Jeffery over there has only gone to court over probation violations. Maria hasn’t seen the inside of a courtroom in 3 weeks. Yesterday I spent the whole week arraigning drug users, not dealers, users.” He said with a slightly bitter tone in his voice. “You on the other hand, work with Rafael Barba on high profile cases. Like those three cops that shot that kid, I bet you didn’t make a lot of friends on that one.” You couldn’t tell if his voice was threatening your just hateful. Either way you found yourself glaring at him.

“Well if that’s all, I have work to do.” You said picking up your pen, and trying to focus on the paperwork in front of you. However, the man’s eyes were still trained on you, and you could feel them. Taking another deep huff you looked up at him, no words were exchanged the two of you just stared one another down. Finally, your eye contact broke when you heard a whistle from the opening of the room. Everyone looked over to see Barba standing in the doorway.

“You. Come with me.” He pointed to you before turning on his heels and walking away. He didn’t even wait for you to gather your things. Quickly you shoved all of you paperwork back into your briefcase not so neatly and rushed after him. You were worried he was pissed off, you wondered what could have happened to make him so angry. Luckily, he was waiting for you at the end of the hallway. 

“You know, you might not want to fight with them.” Barba told you, continuing to walk when you caught up with him.

“I wasn’t trying to fight, he started it.” You mumbled, managing to look over your shoulder to make sure you weren’t being followed. It was the first time you had done that. It was the first time you ever felt the need to.

“Well, can I say that I like how you didn’t back down then?” He asked with a small smirk spreading across his lips, which got you to grin too. You were starting to feel relief when you walked through the doors to Barba’s waiting room, where Carmen smiled at the two of you.

“Good morning. Y/N, it’s nice to see you back, how are you doing?”

“I’m good, thanks for asking.” You smiled back at her.

“Sir, Detective Carisi called.” Carmen said handing him a note.

“Thanks.” He took the note before leading you into his actual office, closing the door behind you.

“Why did Sonny call?” You asked setting your briefcase in the chair by his desk.

“He was just calling about a case.”

“Oh yeah? What case?”

“The… uh… Boyd case.” Barba hesitated for way too long to be believed. You knew Sonny was checking up on you, and Barba was trying to hide it from you.

“Rafael, you are a lawyer, shouldn’t you be better at lying?” You asked

“I am, but I feel like we shouldn’t lie to each other, so of course I’m not very good at it. That should be a good thing right?” He walked closer to you, putting his hand on your shoulder. You looked at his smile, and couldn’t help but smile back. The weight that sat on your chest was lifted. You somehow forgot how safe you felt with him, how comforting his touch was, how soothing his voice was.

“I do appreciate that,” you told him. Reaching out, you took his hand in yours, and leaned toward him. It had been so long since you had been alone together, and for a moment you had completely forgotten you were at work, and so had he. Leaning in, your lips were almost touching, when there was a knock on the door. The two of you had mastered the act of pulling away from each other like nothing had ever happened.

He dropped his hand from your shoulder, you plopped into the chair you were standing next to, pulling your hands away from each other, Barba seamlessly took a few steps away from you, and you pulled a few files from your briefcase. This all happened before Carmen opened the door letting in Lieutenant Benson, and Sonny. You rolled your eyes, letting out an almost silent sigh seeing Sonny again. You looked down at your upside down paperwork, and before anyone could see it and question it, you closed the file and tossed it on Barba’s desk.

“Lieutenant, Detective, what can I do for you?” Barba asked, sitting on the edge of his desk.

“We came, because there was a break in the case.” Sonny said

“The Boyd case?” You asked while eyeing Barba, and he glared almost playfully at you.

“I’m sorry… There is no Boyd case.” Benson said in confusion

“Interesting.”

“No, Y/N,” Sonny said moving the conversation right along. “Your brother’s case.”

“A break in my brothers case?” Sometimes you hated the emotional side of you, because you wanted to cry just hearing anything about your brothers case. Instead, you cleared your throat and pulled up your big girl breeches. “What’s wrong now?”

“No, it’s nothing wrong per-say.” Benson said “There is a sort of flaw with the victim.”

“Flaw?” Barba asked, pulling off his suit jacket laying it over his leg.

“She was paid,”

“Paid by who?” You asked. You felt very conflicted about the hope rising in your stomach. You shouldn’t feel hopeful that the case would fall apart, you shouldn’t feel hopeful that maybe this girl was only after money, you shouldn’t feel hopeful, but you do. You feel hopeful that maybe your brother wasn’t a rapist.

“A woman that she knew in high school, this woman used to work for David until she was fired. The circumstances were not great, and let’s just say we are starting to think maybe there is more to the story than we originally thought.” Benson said

“So, my brother is innocent, he is being released?”

“We aren’t quite there yet, but the evidence needs to be turned over to the defense.” In the end it was all talk, but with the new evidence your brother could win. You smiled slightly, trying to hide it, especially from the Lieutenant. But you could vaguely see a grin on Sonny’s face as well.

@scarletsoldierrr​

[neverbacksdown7476]

Felt, on a personal level.

When you temporarily stop watching a show so you can finish your self-insert au in your head without canon getting in the way.

[neverbacksdown7476]

[neverbacksdown7476]

It’s that time of the year again!

[neverbacksdown7476]

Don’t say it part 7?!?

Working on it. I’m due to give birth this month so I have a lot of things going on. I may not post for a while.

[neverbacksdown7476]

Don’t Say It (Part 6)

Warnings: Angst

Part 5     Part 7

Pancakes heated slowly in the pan, but the smell of bacon flooded the apartment, with music coming quietly from your phone. Though you weren’t singing and dancing around in your underwear like girls always seemed to do in the movies, you were just taking the time to enjoy your Sunday. It wasn’t often for you to have an actual day off, without having to worry about scrambling to finish paperwork. You were so relieved, in fact, that you didn’t hear Barba walking up behind you.

“It smells good.” Barba said wrapping his arms around your waist, gently placing a kiss on your cheek.

“Well, I hope it tastes good then.” Your face started heating up, turning a late shade of pink. This whole thing with Barba was still really new, a week to be precise. The two of you had decided to start dating secretly, until you could become your own ADA, without Barba having to watch over you constantly.

“I’m sure it will.” Barba said, setting the table as the food finished cooking. The two filled their plates, and sat down to eat.

“So, would you like to do something today?” Barba asked

“What? Like watch television?”

“No, like go to a museum, the park, or if you want to the movies.”

“So like a date?” You almost choked on a piece of pancake.

“Only if you want.” Barba stifled a laugh

“Sorry, I just wasn’t expecting that.” You explained, taking a drink of water. “Yeah, let’s do something.” You were able to regain your composer. “The park sounds nice.” Barba smiled kindly at you, as you two finished eating.

It didn’t take long for the two of you to get ready. You wore light colored jeans, dark blue blouse, and black flats. A cute, but casual look. Barba on pretty much the same hand was wearing dark colored jeans, nice loafers, and a maroon long sleeved shirt. Even while living with Barba it was strange to see him in anything other than a suit and suspenders.

“I think this is the first time since getting hired on at the DA’s office that I haven’t been working.” You said as Barba walked up to you.

“Well it happens once in a blue moon.” Barba slowly reached his hand out taking your hand in his. It all seemed so surreal. The magic ended as fast as it had started when your phone started ringing. You sighed, reaching into your back pocket and pulling out your phone.

“Hello?” You answered the phone.

“Y/N, hey, you need to come to the precinct.” Sonny’s voice came over the phone.

“Don’t you usually call Barba when you need someone to come in?” You asked, and watched as Barba’s head fell back with a silent sigh. Wrapping his arms around you, he pulled you into his chest.

“He will get a call too, but Y/N, it’s David.”

“David, as in, my brother David?” You asked pushing away from Barba. This is when Barba’s phone started ringing. You only saw his face for a second, but it was plastered with a confused look. Not having time to worry about that, you rushed away from Barba in hopes Sonny wouldn’t hear the phone ringing or the man talking. If Sonny did hear anything, he  was kind enough not to ask.

“Yeah, and hurry, it doesn’t look good.” With that Sonny hung up the phone, and you looked at Barba with a somber look.

----

You rushed from the elevator into the squad room, leaving Barba in your dust. Sonny was the first one to come up to you, stopping you before you got too far ahead of yourself.

“Sonny, I need to see David, now!” You tried getting past him.

“I’ve already told him not to talk to anyone until his lawyer gets here.”

“Yeah, I called one on my way over, but I’d like to talk to my brother until then.”

“No, you will not. There is no such thing as brother-sister confidentiality.” Barba advised, walking into the squad room. “And you know that.” He finished, and you sucked in a deep breath trying to calm yourself down. He was right, of course he was right, you just needed to calm down. “Walk me through what we have, and technically Y/N should not be here, so she is not hearing any of this.”

“Right.” Sonny agreed shooting a look between the two of you, before leading you to the white board where everyone sat. Eyes glanced up at you, but it seemed to take forever before someone finally spoke up.

“Erica Walker came to us yesterday, claiming she was assaulted two months ago. After talking to her she said David Y/L/N was the one who had assaulted her.” Fin spoke first, apparently the bravest of the squad, or he just didn’t care about the personal aspect.

“Two months ago? So I’m assuming there is no DNA.” You blurted out, ignoring the look you for from Barba, and the look Benson flashed him.

“Well, no,” Benson focused her attention back on you.

“Then why is my brother already in police custody waiting on an attorney?” You asked snapping your head to the side, as Sonny put a hand on her shoulder in attempts to calm you down.

“That’s what I’m wondering.” A familiar voice came from behind you. All eyes fell on Rita, a lawyer everyone knew all too well.

“There is a witness.” Sonny said, tightening his grip on your shoulder just a little.

“I’d like to talk to my client.” Rita sighed slightly

“Very well, you can let him know he’ll be transferred to the tombs tomorrow.” Benson said, as she broke away from the group, leading Rita to interrogation.

“Alright, you need to go,” Barba told her.

“What? No, David is still-” You started, but was interrupted.

“Not right now. You will have your chance to talk to him, but this is not the time, nor the place. You need to go home.”

“Carisi, why don’t you take Y/L/N home.” Dodds spoke up, probably to ease the tension in the air.

“Right,” Sonny put his arm around your shoulders, guiding you out of the squad room.

---

Three days had gone by, seventy-two hours. Your phone had been blowing up with texts, and phone calls from family and friends. Everyone wanted to know what was going on. You didn’t have any answers though. David claimed he had consentual sex with this girl. The girl claims she didn’t want to, that he forced her. There was also surveillance video of the two of them leaving together.There was another girl who said she heard this girl crying and saying ‘no.’ Rita talked about taking a plea, but it would put him on the registry, and in jail for five years. David didn’t want to take the plea, even though you told him to.

So your phone layed on the other side of the room, buzzing aimlessly. You just laid on the couch, where you had hardly moved from in the last three days. You had moved back home, even though the threats haven’t stopped. You couldn’t take the chance of going to Barba’s though, because Sonny had been coming over almost non-stop.

“Y/N, open up.” A voice came from behind the door along with a knock, but you just ignored it hoping he would just go away. “I know you are in there.” Sonny yelled through the door, so with a loud groan you for up and answered the door.

“I’m fine, you don’t have to keep coming over.” You told him as you walked back to the couch.

“You didn’t show up for David’s arraignment.” Sonny walked into the apartment, closing the door behind him.

“Nope,”

“Why not? Your parents, and brothers seemed pretty upset.”

“That is probably why my phone has been ringing more than usual.” Sonny let out an exasperated sigh as someone else started knocking on the door. “And why everyone keeps showing up.” You didn’t budge, so Sonny went to answer the door. Okay, so you might have been acting just a little childish, but you were so tired. Tired of people bothering you.

“Barba funny seeing you here.” Sonny said as he looked back at you.

“I came to let Y/N know bail was set at $100,000, which he has already made.” He walked past Sonny, setting his briefcase on the coffee table, and sitting next to you on the couch. “Also to see what’s going on with you.”

“I’m fine.” You said, looking away from him. Staring at the ground, because that was the only place you could look where there weren’t eyes staring back at you. The DA had given you the week off, and with you back at your own apartment you hadn’t seen Barba in three days. So things were really tense between the two of you.

“No you’re not.” Sonny interjected sitting on the coffee table, right in front of you. You didn’t know what to tell them, how to explain to them the feeling of overwhelming fear and sadness for your brother. Your emotions welled up in you, and tears burned the back of your throat. You put your hands on your shoulders, as if you were hugging yourself, trying to comfort yourself.

“He’s my brother.” Your blurted out as the tears started pouring down your cheeks. “I help put away rapists, but now my little brother is being accused of being one. Even worse, I can’t help him.” You cried, and hung your head, whether in shame or just trying to hide the tears.

“It’s going to be okay, we are going to figure this out, together.” Barba said, putting his arm around you, pulling you into a hug, and letting you bury your face in his chest.

@scarletsoldierrr

[neverbacksdown7476]

When are you going to write the next part of Don’t Say It ? I love the series so much :) !!

Funny story. So I write on paper, because I’m old school, and have it written alread. I just have to find my laptop and type it up. Should only take me a couple of days.

[neverbacksdown7476]

Don’t Say It (Part 5)

Hey, I’m alive! Not my gif! Sorry this took so long.

Warnings: Angst

Part 4     Part 6

“Y/N!” A voice shouted behind you, “Y/N!” The voice got closer to you so you turned seeing Sonny jogging towards you, holding two cups of coffee. “I need a favor.” He handed you the cup. Fall had set in completely, so the warmth of the cup was appreciated by your bare hands and your fingers that had begun to turn pink.

“Sonny, come on, seriously?” You had learned real fast that when an SVU detective asked for a favor you were going to have to do something or ask someone you really didn’t want to. The detectives also learned that sending Sonny to ask you would get them a lot farther than asking Barba.

“Please, Y/N,  it’s important this is a really bad guy.”

“They are all really bad guys.” Sonny stopped grabbing your arm gently as to stop you too.

“I’ll make you dinner tomorrow night.” He offered you, but you just sighed. Suddenly you had to think of a lie, an excuse why that wouldn’t work. You had been staying with Barba for the last few weeks, and no one could know, not even Sonny.

“Sorry I can’t do dinner, but I’ll take a rain check.”

“You have been acting strange here lately, should I be worried about you?”

“Of course not, Barba has just been pushing me pretty hard lately. I guess sometime soon they are wanting me to work on my own, so I have to know what I’m doing. Sooner than later.” You sighed, that wasn’t necessarily a lie, but not true either. Yes they wanted you on your own soon, but you were pretty sure it wouldn’t be until you had worked with Barba for a year. “Besides that, these crazy detectives keep bringing us cases that involve a lot of leg work, which brings me back to; what do you want Sonny?”

“I need a warrant.”

“I assumed.”

“This guys name is Kevin Preller,”

“Okay,” you handed off the coffee, you had only barely sipped on, back to Sonny. Pulling out your phone, you started typing his name into the notes.

“We need a warrant for his home computers, looking for child pornography, and for the rest of his apartment, looking for souvenirs that we think the perp took from these girls.”

“What do you think he has.”

“A heart necklace, a scrunchie, and a little pink purse.”

“Age of the girls?”

“Nine, and ten years old.”

“And how do you know this is the guy?��

“Well we think he has been hanging around the park that all three of them went to.”

“Wow, you think? I can’t ask Barba for a warrant on ‘think.’”

“Y/N, can you at least try?” He handed you the coffee back, as you put your phone away. His hand landed on your shoulder, causing you to look up at him. He had a half cocked grin on his face, and eyes that matched a puppy, or maybe a kitten. You couldn’t quite put your finger on which kind of sad it was. Letting out a loud huff to let him know you were not happy about the situation.

“I will try, but no promises.”

“I owe you.”

“There is a bar down the street, a lot of pool tables, and cheap beer.”

“Alright, I’ll pick you up after work.” Sonny said, as he turned to run off to head back to work. So you did the same, walking into the building, sighing as you rushed to find Barba who was working diligently on a huge stack of paperwork.

“I know we decided to always get to work at different times, but even so you are running a little late.”

“I ran into Sonny on the way here.”

“What does he want this time?” He asked setting his pen down, and giving you all of his attention.

“A warrant.” You told him everything Sonny had given you, and could see the hesitation on his face.

“It won’t be easy. No judge is going to want to sign that based on that information.”

“I’m aware.”

“I’ll ask for it today, but this is the last time I go begging for a favor, just because Detective Carisi asks you,”

“Thank you?” You said, almost asking because you felt offended by that statement. As if you had stepped out of line, or offended him in some way. This was your job though, his job too. When the detectives needed something, it was your job to try to get it for them. So why was he acting so weird? You decided to just ignore it, and move on. You started drawing up the paperwork for the warrant. If there was one thing you knew better than anything by now it was paperwork. You picked up almost all of it since you got there, especially the stuff that Barba didn’t want to do.

Things were getting dull around the office, and honestly you were ready to start doing your own work as a lawyer. The paperwork sucked, and you wanted to sit in the first chair, and you wanted to argue with scumbag lawyers in judge’s chambers. Those were things that you only got to observe Barba doing, and observing Barba was your biggest issue. During the day you couldn’t keep your eyes off of him, how he would strut around the courtroom with cockiness, pride, and confidence. The way he would sit at his desk, sleeves rolled up, hunched over, and the mischievous grin that would occasionally cross his lips.

After work was even worse though. His jacket thrown over the lounge chair in the living room. They way he slumped on the couch, eyes focused on either the television or whatever book he was reading, only a few feet from you. Within arms length of you, yet so far away.

-----

Lining up your shot, you pulled the pool cue back then thrusting it towards the ball. You watched it smack into another ball which just barely missed the corner pocket. You groaned as you pushed yourself off the table, and looked over at Sonny.

“Alright, what’s going on with you?” He asked leaning against the pool table.

“What do you mean?”

“That’s the fifth shot you missed,”

“I don’t see why that’s so weird.” You said lifting your beer to your lips

“In all the years I’ve known you I have never been able to beat you.”

“Maybe I’m just having an off night.” You retorted

“Nah, come on spill it.”

“There is nothing.”

“Is there talk of a promotion?” Sonny asked

“No, have you heard anything?”

“Something going on with your brothers?” He continued to grill you

“Haven’t talked to Mark, or Brian in two weeks, and Gabriel is enjoying his second honeymoon in Jamaica. Rich bastard, I wish I could go on vacation.” You joked, earning a small chuckle from him.

“Well I haven’t heard anything from my folks about your folks. So the only other thing I can think of is a guy.” You lifted your beer to your lips again, and started drinking until it was gone. “That’s it; there is a guy!”

“No, when would I have time to date?” You grabbed the pitcher of beer refilling your cup.

“Okay, so maybe you aren’t dating anyone. You have a crush on someone.”

“I liked you much better before you became a detective.”

“I bet you did, so who is it?”

“No one. Come on Sonny, just drop it.”

“If it was someone I didn’t know you would have just told me.”

“Sonny, enough with the interrogation.” You sighed

“Alright, alright, I will leave it alone, for now.”

“Mhm.” You brushed him off, but saw that look in his eyes. He wouldn’t let it go for long, but you were probably safe for the night.

-----

You tried to unlock the door quietly, and sneak into the apartment which was pointless since the lights were still on. Cocking your head to the side, you looked at an irritated Barba hunched over a stack of papers sitting on the coffee table. That wasn’t the unusual part, the half empty bottle of scotch on the table, and a glass in his hand, was. Suddenly, you felt an awful lot like a high school kid getting caught sneaking in after curfew.

“You’re still up?” You mumbled, in the form of a question.

“Yeah, I was catching up on some paperwork.”

“Paperwork? I’m pretty sure I have most of it finished.”

“Most, that was the key word.”

“I could have finished it tomorrow.”

“Probably.” He said as he lifted his glass of scotch, taking a big drink of it. You began to wonder who had drank more tonight, you or him. “Where were you tonight?” He finally lifted his eyes to meet yours.

“I was out, with friends.” You told him

“With Carisi?”

“I don’t see how that is any of your business.” He chuckled finishing off his glass. That’s when it dawned on you, the anger, the worrying, all the questions about Sonny, it was starting to make sense. You watched him pour another glass of scotch. As he lifted it to his lips you made your way to the couch, where you sat next to him. When he set the half empty glass of scotch on the table, you picked it up with an almost smug grin. “You are jealous.” You stated, finishing off the scotch he had left. His eyes stayed focused on the paperwork ahead of him. Silence fell over the two of you, because you didn’t know what else to say.

“Even if I was, there would be nothing I could do about it.” Barba finally broke the silence, not moving his head, but looking at you out of the corner of his eye. “As of right now I am your boss.”

“You kissed me before, that wasn’t a problem.”

“No one knew about that.” Finally turning his head to make full eye contact with you. There was a sort of lust behind his eyes that you were drowning in, a look you were sure you had as well.

“No one knows we are living together either.” You said moving slightly closer to him, as he leaned closer to you. “No one has to know if you say you are jealous either.”

“I’m not jealous of Carisi, just so we are clear.”

“Then what is it?”

“I’m jealous of all the time the two of you get to spend together outside of work, so casually.” He said as he continued to lean in closer to you.

“All you have to do is ask.” You mumbled, a smirk ran across his lips before they crashed against yours, his hands tangled in your hair pulling you closer. You savored every moment of the kiss. His soft lips, the taste of scotch, and the passion behind it. The kiss ended so quickly, as he pressed his forehead against yours.

“Yeah? And no one has to know?” He asked

“No one.” With those final words his lips pressed gently against yours again.

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@scarletsoldierrr