nooneofimportance

[nooneofimportance]

😒

[nooneofimportance]

Really hate when people call people who say they're straight and slept with someone of the same gender "straight".

Gay people who sleep with the opoosite gender aren't any less gay for it.

Asexuals! Exist! And have sex!! Ran into an asshole the other day that said enjoying sex means you can't be asexual. BITCH. SEXUAL ORIENTATION IS (mostly) ABOUT ATTRACTION NOT WHO YOU PRIMARILY HAVE SEX WITH. Hello????

Also bisexuals aren't in a gay or straight relationship unless they say they are (Kinda fucked there are people who exclude lesbian bisexuals and people that exclude bisexuals who aren't lesbians. Fucking hell.)

Let people have sex, god.

Or don't (have sex), as in my case.

And if they change their label later that is their fucking business.

[nooneofimportance]

I learned just the other day that I'm likely allergic to apples. This is *devastating* primarily because I can tolerate like... 5 fruits total. Also devastating because apples were my favorite of those 5 but the thing is that I know I eat poorly and wanted to start doing better and it's now exponentially harder because I'm allergic to 2 of the 5 fruits i can eat at least (also allergic to bananas) although i might possibly also be allergic to cherries as all 3 of those fall under Oral Allergy Syndrome (and just yesterday I got a lil (not enough to be certain but...) itchy mouth after eating something with cherry&acai in it so.....). That's 3 of the 5 edible fruits. That i actually can't eat cause they hurt.

Fresh peaches and occasional grapes please don't hurt me I just wanna be nice to my body for the first time in my life please.

I'm probably also allergic to shellfish because fuck me. Can I at least have non-shellfish seafood? Please?

Reading your posts feels like eating a banana, it’s kinda tingly and itchy and makes me very uncomfortable but I also like it too much to stop

you are allergic to bananas 

[nooneofimportance]

My primary OC is alloaro!! (they self-ID'd as pansexual in their late teens/early twenties and then decided omnisexual worked better for them in their late twenties. Since they've known the terms they've always ID'd as recipromantic, ambiamorous, and genderfluid). (the OC was raised by humans as a human for a decade before being told she's not human so it might be a gray area for this post actually? there is no community or culture regarding her species: her grandmother was a mummy, her mom is dead, her aunt is comatose, and it's just her, her twin sister and all the humans that helped raise them. her twin sister is by contrast a femme demigirl lesbian and her aunt is at least romantically interested in men). She grew up looking at romance and being like "wut? no thank you. i'm gonna sing something now." (similar reaction to the idea of becoming pregnant and having kids one day which only got worse after she learned more about how her species reproduction process worked) and then as a preteen/young teenager she had waaaay more important things to think about (as a non-human raised by humans and she was recently told about it so she's processing—the actual problem being that her biomom was a figurative monster in addition to being a literal one and the OC started internalizing how much of a clone of her mother she was and uhhhhh it was not pretty emotionally speaking). A classmate asked her out in her mid-teens when she was doing better emotionally and she accepted because she wanted to try out dating + the classmate was HOT. She did come to have romantic attraction towards the classmate, although they maintain it was not romantic love by the time of the breakup and gets weirded out (aggravated in later years) if someone pushes that idea on her experience. The classmate broke up with her after finding out she wasn't human and... didn't react well let's say. OC had a relapse that was *far* worse. She wasn't really interested in trying romantic dating again any time soon for several obvious reasons. She spent her early 20s having plenty of sex—either one night stands or friends with benefits or not-friends with benefits and she was LIVING. (I'm still iffy on the idea of her trying more romantic dates at this point or if her experience previous was enough for her to be like "nah i know what i am and how i work fuck you". I like both avenues tbh. she hasn't romantically dated in her later 20s though so if there's a point for more dating experimentation is would be her early 20s.) I also feel that it's super important to point out that her #1 most important relationship is her familial one with her twin sister. Her sister will *always* be her most important person, end of story. (the rest of her family is also super important to her. and while she considers most of the people she grew up with who aren't blood-related to her family as well, she also considers her relationships with that part of her family, especially the ones around her age, to be pretty platonic as well). And tbh she considers her platonic feelings more important than romantic ones too. (at least in a vaccuum. in practice she prefers the idea of having platonic AND romantic feelings for a long-term romantic partner).

My primary OC is alloaro!! (they self-identified as pansexual in their late teens/early twenties and then decided omnisexual worked better for them in their late twenties. Since they've known the terms they've always ID'd as recipromantic, ambiamorous, and genderfluid). I hope you were serious about hearing about OCs cause I may have excitedly rambled about them lmao. (the OC was raised by humans as a human for a decade before being told she's not human so it might be a gray area for this post actually? there is no community or culture regarding her species: her grandmother was a mummy, her mom is dead, her aunt is comatose, and it's just her, her twin sister and all the humans that helped raise them. her twin sister is by contrast a femme demigirl lesbian and her aunt is at least romantically interested in men). She grew up looking at romance and being like "wut? no thank you. i'm gonna sing something now." (similar reaction to the idea of becoming pregnant and having kids one day which only got worse after she learned more about how her species reproduction process worked) and then as a preteen/young teenager she had waaaay more important things to think about (as a non-human raised by humans and she was recently told about it so she's processing—the actual problem being that her biomom was a figurative monster in addition to being a literal one and the OC started internalizing how much of a clone of her mother she was and uhhhhh it was not pretty emotionally speaking). A classmate asked her out in her mid-teens when she was doing better emotionally and she accepted because she wanted to try out dating + the classmate was HOT. She did come to have romantic attraction towards the classmate, although they maintain it was not romantic love by the time of the breakup and gets weirded out (aggravated in later years) if someone pushes that idea on her experience. The classmate broke up with her after finding out she wasn't human and... didn't react well let's say. OC had a relapse that was *far* worse. She wasn't really interested in trying romantic dating again any time soon for several obvious reasons. She spent her early 20s having plenty of sex—one night stands, friends with benefits, acquaintances with benefits, clubs etc, and she was LIVING. (I'm still iffy on the idea of her trying more romantic dates at this point or if her experience previous was enough for her to be like "nah i know what i am and how i work fuck you". I like both avenues tbh. she hasn't romantically dated in her later 20s though so if there's a point for more dating experimentation is would be her early 20s.) I feel it's super important to point out that her #1 most important relationship is her familial one with her twin sister. (the rest of her family is also super important to her as well, although sister is far above even them). And she considers her platonic feelings more important than romantic ones too. (at least in a vacuum. in practice she prefers the idea of having platonic AND romantic feelings for a long-term partner). For her, it's more that romance or a romantic partner isn't important for her. If it came up, and she was interested in the person, and she felt up for romantic dating, then sure she'd try it and probably enjoy it. But she's not looking for it. if it happens it happens and if it doesn't it doesn't. One way she describes her recipromanticism to other characters is "I don't get crushes." She doesn't really notice when people are flirting romantically with her and although her sense for when other people are romantically flirting with others is more accurate, she doesn't like assuming how someone else feels about others or their orientations. You really do have to tell her to her face for her to Get it. Flectic attraction to decide if she'll agree to date a person or not when she is asked. They've described themself as having 3 primary interests: family&friends, music, and combat. Romance isn't remotely near that list.

i wish we had alloaro representation in media. a charming character who fucks - both literally AND aesthetically. one that makes other characters go "wow! they're so cool and good in bed, but ultimately un-datable, because as soon as they sense any romantic intention on you, they flee" (kinda like lucifer morningstar from "lucifer". he's aroallo in my heart)

a character who's funny and has a horrifyingly 80's sense of fashion (they have a curly combed-out mullet and mismatched earrings. you'll find them at pride wearing a corn costume because it "matches the aroallo flag" and they're "being subtle") or one who's the embodiment of a 60's greaser (their motorcycle helmet is themed after the aro flag and the back of their leather jacket says "LOVELESS / LOVE LOSES") or one who's a girly fanfiction writer that has more ships than a star wars movie (their fics are muntifandom-ly famous and most their stuff is covered in yaoi/yuri patches and stickers. everyone thinks they're a hopeless romantic because of it, but that's exactly why they're so big on the fiction ≠ reality discourse) or...

anyone else, really. just ultimately a HUMAN who's casually aromantic. one who doesn't make it a parade but isn't subtle about it, either. will they hold other character's hands? maybe. kiss their cheek? perhaps. hang out with them, on picnics and walks along the river? can't see why not! but platonically. or maybe have them be genuinely romance-repulsed & not so eager to participate in anything socially perceived as romantic. that would also be amazing.

let them express themselves sexually! let them fuck. give them a..."fuckbuddy", if you must. or a best friend who's sexually involved with them - classic romcom material, i know - but without it being "complicated"; because there's no romance involved to complicate it.

give them funny scenes. another character tries to kiss their lips or ask them on a date? they laugh nervously, the scene cuts and we get a hilarious shot of them escaping through the bathroom window. or audibly saying "ew" and then regretting it. another character is struggling to write a romcom/romance book without it being corny? we get a scene where our character casually describes the most romantical (and, to them, unappealing) plot ever - because, much like aces acing the smut department, they're far from misunderstanding what is or isn't heartstopping for alloromantics - only to have the other character stare at them like "?????????? HELLO????". give us a scene of them being confused as to why their hookup is yelling at them for acting "so casual" and responding with a quotable shitty line ("just because we had sex last night i can't call you "bro"? / "what? expected me to marry you or something? get off my bed, it's 9AM" / "would you rather have me mad? sad? what's happening here. give me a hint")

but give them complicated scenes too. scenes portraying the loneliness that comes with being aromantic but not asexual, the lack of community. them talking about how hard it is to maintain sexual relationships just sexual. the painful "breakups" because one of their friends declared their undying love for them but they cannot possibly match that energy, even if they wanted to. have them weep because somehow that keeps happening. the unfairness in being accused of heartlessness and selfishness by other queers. the shame on being told they're fetishistic and the reason why queer men/women/people are seen as sex-crazed or impure.

...anyways, i'm rambling- do y'all have any aroallo ocs? or ideas for alloaro characters? maybe aroallo headcanons? i'd love to know what you think! :)

(don't tag as #ace / #asexual / #asexuality)

[nooneofimportance]

bisexual->asexual & agender->asexual & agender & cupioromantic->asexual & agender & aromantic->asexual & agender & loveless aro->asexual & demigender (constant agender, flux antigender feminine) & loveless

what was y'all's identity progression? mine was something like

lesbian -> bi -> bi & ply -> ply -> ply & gray ace -> bi & gray ace -> bi lesbian & gray ace -> bi lesbian & gray ace & genderqueer

(there were a bunch of acespec and gender microlabels in there too that sorta come and go and come again but i simplified)

[nooneofimportance]

this is such vital information !! fight genocide by learning and only using the Palestinian words for the towns and cities of Palestine, because they are PALESTINIAN.

do not let Palestine be erased through language. the colonisation of language is just as deadly.

(edit with the link! please reblog this version instead!!!!)

[nooneofimportance]

if i say "the queer community", i am referring to the community of self identified queers. if you're not a self identified queer, then i wasn't talking about you!

"i don't like to be called queer because it hurt me!" cool, fine, whatever. the word gay hurt me, i get it. but see, i didn't actually call you queer, i was talking about, and this might be difficult to follow; people who like being queer! that's why i said "queer community", to refer to the broad community of queers.

"but i'm gay/lesbian/bi/ace/whatever and i don't like it being used as an umbrella term!" okay, cool. if someone forces you under an umbrella you don't like that sure does suck! i hate being forced under the "LBGT+" umbrella myself. i absolutely loathed "trans*", i get it, trust me. i would like to draw your attention to the fact that i just said "queer community", which explicit in text and implicit in meaning, refers to a community of people... bare with me here.... people who are queer. if you do not consider yourself queer.... then it wasn't about you. it was about me and my community.

"but i know what group you're talking about and it applies to me too!" okay but you see that, you see that you're putting yourself under the umbrella there right? and then complaining about it, right? it's not my fault you decided it was about you? you're always going "it's okay for you to use, but" and then attack us when we do use it for ourselves, by shoving yourself under an imagined umbrella of your construction, hurting us in the shove, and then screaming like you were forced in here.

"but it's a--" listen.

listen to me.

you might think i'm being obstinant and maybe i am a little! but i'm trying to illuminate a point here. you've constructed an idea in your head of "us" as a monolith, a singular group that you want covered by a singular umbrella with a singular term; and you've decided that this "us" group - including you - is who i'm talking about right now, and then you've gotten shitty at me for using a word you don't like for an idea you projected over my words.

but here's the secret: there is no singular group like that. there is no monolith. there is no singular cohesive "us". there's just people, individuals with infinite experiences and selves and sexualities and genders and loves and all these beautiful things, and sometimes when we're similar enough we band together into groups and pick labels; gay, trans, queer, rainbow, whatever. these are just names, names for imagined groups, imagined groups with fake made up boundaries! people will argue there are definitions, gay means this, lesbian means that; but people will always disagree, so the names expand and the groups get broader. msm, wlw, bi, pan, genderqueer, rainbow quiltbag alphabet soup!

and you can expand and contact and refine and broaden but you will never cover everyone. at some point, you have to just accept letting people self define, and decide if they want to be in the group. if you have a "gay" group, the socially straight msm will get shitty at being called gay and it's not the fault of either the gays or the word "gay" that they're not included! people will expand and stretch and redefine and shrink, all these groups and labels will ebb and flow as different people have different needs and want to include - and exclude!- different people for their communities.

but some of "us", many generations ago, got sick and tired of constantly redefining labels and groups and decided to pick a nice word for ourselves and welcome anyone who liked it to use it, and that's queer. maybe it was already a slur that we reclaimed, maybe it was already our word before it became a slur, maybe it was just common slang for someone a little unusual and oddball and we liked that! historians both academic and communal disagree! it doesn't even matter, it's our word; "our" being anyone who likes it. if you like "queer" and want to be queer and respect the existing queers, you're welcome. and generation after generation, we pass it on for anyone to use, to say: it's okay not to box yourself in, it's okay not to define yourself down to the molecule, it's okay to be free, to come and go, to love and be whatever. it's our sanctuary. you are queer if you want to be queer. that is the gift that was given to me by the queers that came before me, i will gift it in turn to anyone that wants to carry it forwards. not everyone has to be queer, but we chose to be.

and you motherfuckers.

you motherfuckers keep smashing through the windows of our sanctuary, declaring it to be your umbrella, scream about slurs like we've never been hurt in our lives, and then hurl violence and vitriol at us because you personally hate being inside our sanctuary and want the entire structure destroyed and rebuilt for you.

fuck you.

i suffered through years of torment and abuse being called gay and having it spat at me with hate, being berated in church for questioning love, being screamed at and beaten by family and classmates and having them spit - literally - the word gay at me. i suffered through it, i survived it, i flourished to spite it and was embraced by queers who taught me love for myself and gave me safe sanctuary in this beautiful, ambiguous word, and you don't get to take that away from me.

if i say "us queers" and you come at me about how it hurts you and start yelling about umbrellas and slurs: 1) i wasn't fucking talking about you, 2) you're not part of my community and don't get to tell me what i call it, and 3) you are the fucking problem here, you are the one doing the hurting right now.

when you come into my community of queers and tell me that our sanctuary is "a slur", you are indistinguishable to me from the people spitting "gay" as they beat me.

if you're gay as in happy, you're free to be that and i won't stop you or tell you your whole core is a slur. you pick whatever umbrella you want to imagine for yourself, and i'll probably chose not to stand under it.

because i am queer. as in fuck. you.

and you will have to kill me to stop me being queer

[nooneofimportance]

Me in a time loop.

The main downside is that any progress I make on my hobbies (video games, writing, etc.) won't be saved. :(

I want a protagonist who gets stuck in a time loop and just. uses it to take a staycation

[nooneofimportance]

"AFAB genitalia" includes T-dicks, phalloplasty penises, and intersex anatomy. Don't use it as shorthand for "vagina".

In general, AFAB and AMAB are useful terms in very specific contexts. Slapping them into sentences as replacements for "male" or "female" is not as inclusive as a lot of you seem to think.

[nooneofimportance]

i feel like there's a trend i'm seeing, esp in online queer spaces, of being, like, oddly against the idea of people being attracted to each other

like I've been seeing the word “sexualization” tossed around to mean sexual attraction and framed as a bad and disrespectful, bordering on nonconsensual, thing.

recently in a sapphic group I’m in, a teenage lesbian mentioned that she’s attracted to her friend and and keeps getting distracted by her boobs. she was immediately dragged by dozens of grown ass adults telling her this was gross and inappropriate

it would have been one thing to tell her not to stare (she already wasn’t tho tbh), but the general gist of the comments was that seeing someone’s body and feeling attraction is *inherently* inappropriate and unethical

it’s totally fine to be attracted to someone. and you know what, a lot of people like boobs and that’s also fine

basically i just keep seeing stuff cropping up in the queer community with the message that sexual (and i guess now romantic?) desire is bad

and that’s uhhh what’s the word, fucked

on the other hand people are chill with tinder and hooking up and there are a ton of “normalize having sex with your friends!!” posts

people are cool with sex but they are not ok with desire

tinder, i think, feels fine because it’s really not about attraction. it’s about fulfilling a general need for sex and isn’t about the person at all.

being attracted to someone, though — looking at or thinking about a specific person who’s already in your life and wanting to have sex with them — that’s what it seems a lot of people aren’t ok with

there’s a level on which i get it. the person is just existing, they didn’t specifically and intentionally put themselves in a space for sexuality like tinder

but, y’all.

this is how attraction works. you spend time with people, you do things alongside them, you get to know them… and maybe you start thinking they’re hot. maybe you want to fuck them or kiss them. this is literally so totally fucking fine.

the thing that’s disrespectful is when you actually do shitty stuff! don’t say vulgar things to them. respect their boundaries. don’t make them uncomfortable. if you approach them for sex or dating and they say no, accept that. etc

but there’s literally nothing wrong with wanting to fuck someone or wanting to date someone.

[nooneofimportance]

This happened on a monsterfucker server I'm in: Someone politely pointed out afab didn't cover everyone who could get pregnant and other people, mostly the mods I think, many of whom are trans I believe, jumped down their throat about it. Specifically citing that "people could feel dysphoria about getting pregnant." and completely talking over them when they brought up intersex people.

- stop saying “afab” when you mean “has a vagina”

- stop saying “amab” when you mean “has a penis”

- there people who were assigned female at birth who have penises

- there are people who were assigned male at birth who have vaginas

- a big part of the reason agab terminology was developed in the first place was to acknowledge and work within the social effects and trauma of coercively assigned gender without assuming what peoples genitals look like and assuming afab = vagine and amab = peen undermines that, makes the whole point null and entirely re-invents coercively assigned gender with “inclusive” paint

[nooneofimportance]

Couldn’t help but notice this reblog in a certain recent “queer is a slur” discourse post.

Beyond being ahistorical, it is significant in its third paragraph, which is almost entirely made up with TERF and alt right dog whistles. For anyone who has even a basic idea of what to look for, this blogger has just outright shown their hand.

Let’s start from the beginning of the text I’ve marked in blue:

“a pedophilia and incest apologist”

This is a very handy tactic especially prevalent in alt-right rhetoric these days. It stigmatises anything it is attached to, in this case the person who coined the term “queer theory.” Topics like pedophilia and incest are extremely taboo and emotionally laden, and attaching them to a subject will cause many people to automatically distance themselves from that term out of a semi-instinctive desire to not associate themselves with such things. Spread this attachment widely enough, and you can push entire groups into abandoning terminology, praxis, and people.

For the record, I’m not sure of the source for this claim. The woman who coined the term “queer theory” was Teresa de Laurentis, and I’ve never seen anything by her which tries to excuse pedophilia or incest. She certainly wrote about the gendered nature of incest, but this was in no way laudatory. This may also be a reference to the work of Gloria Anzaldua, who helped further popularize the term. She spoke frankly and openly about her sexual fantasies, many of them of a taboo nature, because of her firm belief in de-stigmatizing discussions about human sexual behaviour. Not only are such fantasies extremely common, they are in no way apologetics for real life abuse, nor do they predict real life behaviour.

“a straight woman with a fetish for gay men”

We’ve gotten to the transphobic dogwhistle now. This is an accusation frequently used against trans men and nonbinary AFAB people, especially those who pursue relationships with men. With the current surge in transphobic public rhetoric, it has received a new breath of life, and trans mlm are currently facing a slew of accusations of being straight women/girls who have just fetishized gay men to the point that they’re trying to “become” gay men/boys themselves (CW: link leads to transphobic hate site genderhq.org). These accusations are even being used in queer circles–including by trans people–to gatekeep who “gets” to write fiction about mlm. Just a week ago, for example, queer writer Alex Marraccini accused indie trans mlm author Ana Mardoll of fetishizing mlm, claiming that Ana’s “fetishistic” writing isn’t nearly as groundbreaking or liberating as the work of real cis gay men.

I’m not sure who the blogger is referring to here as there’s no real consensus on who first used the term “queer studies.” However, I think they may be referring to Eve Kosofsky Sedgwick, who was most certainly not a straight woman. She was queer and came out as a trans man, though as far as I know continued to publicly prefer she/her pronouns (hence my own pronoun use here).

“use intentionally over academic language”

Ah, good old anti-intellectualism. If I can’t understand you, you must be using over-academic language just to confuse me on purpose. This dogwhistle not only gives people an excuse to dismiss anything they don’t understand straight away, it pushes the conspiracy theory that we academics are part of an ivory tower conspiracy to Queer Everything for…reasons (see below).

“to obfuscate that their founding texts and members are Marxists”

Aaaand here we are, the full show of the hand. This blogger is either alt-right or well down the pipeline to becoming one. The old chestnut that These Academics We Disagree With are all secret Marxists is one that is, you guessed it, strongly tied into antisemitism and Nazi conspiracies that push the belief that Karl Marx, Marxism, and Marxists are part of a global Jewish conspiracy that seeks to destroy the West.

And of course we have one more “incest and pedophilia” whistle to round things off, just to doubly ensure that people understandably disgusted by those things attach them to queer theorists.

Anyway, once again I beg the good people of Tumblr to please pay close attention to TERF rhetoric, where it comes from, how it’s used, and the other movements that it is tied to. I am not being a paranoid conspiracist when I say that “queer is a slur” discoursers and “pedophilia and incest” scaremongers and their ilk (including anti-kink discoursers) are tied to TERF rhetoric, which is itself allied increasingly with the alt right. They are telling you this for themselves. Listen to them when they tell you who they are.

[nooneofimportance]

[nooneofimportance]

There’s a particular attitude I often see on the internet that goes something like “If you aren’t part of a particular marginalized group, then you could never understand their experience, so don’t pretend to relate.” And while obviously you’re never going to relate to every aspect of that identity unless you are also of that identity, I feel like this attitude really diminishes opportunities for finding kinship and bonding in similar experiences even if those experiences aren’t exactly the same and/or are the result of different identities.

For example, I’m white and neurodivergent, and I was talking to a Black neurotypical friend about masking, and how I feel like I have to change the entire way I present myself in order to not be considered weird in public. She responded with “Oh, some of that sounds kind of like code-switching— how I have to switch away from using AAVE in white-dominated settings in order to be accepted.” And then we bonded over how frustrating and ridiculous it is that AAVE and stimming are both considered unacceptable in “professional” settings.

Another time, a straight Jewish friend was telling me about a book she had just finished reading, which was written by a Jewish author and had a Jewish main character. She was saying that it was really nice to read a book written by a Jewish author, because even when gentile authors do their research and write a pretty accurate Jewish character, they never quite feel Jewish— you can always tell the author was a gentile. And I said “Oh that sounds kind of like when I read queer characters written by straight authors— you can always tell the author was straight even if they do their research and get things fairly right. So even though I’m happy when any book features queer characters, it’s really especially nice to read queer characters written by queer authors.” And we bonded over this similar experience, and we were both excited that the other understood even if we were coming to this experience from different angles, and then we swapped book recommendations. This conversation is also a great example of when that internet attitude DOES apply— when someone outside of a particular group is trying to understand that group’s entire experience well enough to accurately write the world as seen through their eyes. They’re never quite going to get it right, and that’s ok! It just means it’s important to also have Own Voices authors writing those types of stories also.

Sometimes it seems like people who have been in internet circles exhibiting this attitude for too long are afraid to ever try to relate to the experiences of anyone in any groups other than their own for fear of causing offense, which is honestly pretty counterproductive. Understanding each other and bonding across groups should be the goal! Relating to each other is not a bad thing!

[nooneofimportance]

[nooneofimportance]

Here’s the thing about LGBT+ vs. Queer.

I’m ace, nonbinary, and demiromantic. With LGBT+ I’m included in the plus. And I’m happy to be included! Indeed, folks pointedly using LGBT without the plus makes my hackles raise.

But. I am sick of being in the fucking plus sign like an afterthought.

And no, adding more to the alphabet soup doesn’t help that feeling. There’s a limit to what human brains can cram in. I don’t think it’s reasonable to make folks say an increasingly long acronym every time they mention the community. I appreciate the effort, but you’re always going to either leave someone out or cram them into the miscellaneous field the plus sign represents.

With Queer I’m just there, alongside my queer siblings. The details may be different, but I’m just as queer as a cis allo gay man or a trans allo straight woman or a genderfuck individual.

We already tried to meet folks who don’t like queer as a word halfway with MOGAI. Marginalized Orientations, Gender Alignment, and Intersex. It’s inclusive without using the Dreaded Q-Word. Surely, if the objection was to “queer” as a Terribly Traumatizing Word (just like, oh, every other word used for us: “gay” was the slur of choice where I was growing up), MOGAI would be the perfect solution, yes?

And yet, that was thrown back into our faces and turned into an insult. So, at that point, I said fuck it and fuck you. I’m queer, and if its inclusivity makes you mad, good.

[nooneofimportance]

Mobius strip pride flag