onceuponymous
onceuponymous
a nice, neutral title
20K posts
I'm Michelle.  Queer, she/her. https://www.etsy.com/shop/YarnFauna
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onceuponymous · 54 minutes ago
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which 3 US presidents do you think would be the best omegas and which 3 bisexual pop stars would be their best matched alphas
1) John Adams
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John Adams was a tireless advocate for the revolution (i.e. topping from the bottom) and he once described himself as "obnoxious, suspected, and unpopular" - "he was known for his bluntness, impatience, and tendency to be easily frustrated with those who disagreed with him." As a brat in Congress, his personality was repulsive, but everyone listened to him and they all still wanted him. They wanted him so bad they made him president. Kind of makes you think.
His match:
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Adams needs someone with a strong personality to challenge his - someone who's not afraid to repel the mainstream in order to realize their vision. Gaga has it, and he needs it. "Bad Romance" in many way encompasses Adams' struggles through the 1776 Continental Congress. They could teach each other much.
2) Theodore Roosevelt
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A man dedicated to the preservation of natural parks and ecological wonders - and for what? To run through the trees under the full moon as his pheromones wafted through the air? We know.
His match:
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Grimes once described herself as becoming "way less gay" after she became pregnant, which is 1) weird, and 2) the reason I'm sticking her with Teddy. I don't think that he could fix her completely, but she seems the type to maintain no moral compass of her own, simply adopting the political ideology of whomever she's with, so maybe there's hope. Maybe Grimes could introduce Teddy to shrooms, and Teddy could take her out on trips in the forest. And then we can find out if Grimes getting a man pregnant makes her more or less gay.
3) Richard Nixon
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Best known for his one legendary debate with the handsome JFK, wherein he became a stuttering, sweating mess, unable to focus or say what he meant. Interesting!
His match:
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Bisexual icon Taylor Swift is also struggling to appease both sides of the political aisle. They could share their woes and their love of good ol' fashioned Americana, and then Taylor could tie him to the wall and make him bark like a dog. The pregnancy would be difficult on both of them with Taylor's extremely busy schedule, and Nixon would regrettably terminate it in the second trimester, causing a rift in the relationship that would never be mended. The resulting laments that Taylor composed about Nixon's abortion would of course be dissected and attributed to a secret relationship with a woman - Nixon's wife.
I welcome critical analysis.
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onceuponymous · 13 hours ago
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what are yall doing that we need this??
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onceuponymous · 18 hours ago
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Just made myself so so sad thinking about Aang's marble trick because from a physics perspective, keeping dense spherical objects afloat on an airstream is not trivial, and he's doing it in a tiny little space without moving his hands. Bending is usually very gestural. So. Everyone in the era of the show is, at best, impressed THAT it is airbending. But Aang's an incredibly young master airbender. He wouldn't be acting like this was the bestest trick ever if it didn't take at least some skill; he's a goofy kid but he's also a prodigy. I bet other airbenders were absolutely blown away (pun fully intended) at the level of precision and force and minimalism of movement on display and now there's no one who understands at all why he expects accolades.
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onceuponymous · 18 hours ago
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@uncharacter-istically
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FAKINHAGE! ❤️ 🤍 ❤️
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onceuponymous · 2 days ago
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Bigtop Burger "Required Reading" List
It (Stephen King) - 1986
Frozen - 2013
"Weird Al" Yankovic (album) - 1983
Cats - 1981
The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari - 1920
Night of the Living Dead - 1968
Austin Powers 4 (Worthikids) - 2020
Shrek - 2001
Living Dead Girl (music video) - 1999
SPACE (Worthikids) - 2017
Palpatine's Journey (Worthikids) - 2019
Dracula - 1897
Beavis and Butt-Head - 1993
Night Moves (Bob Seger) - 1976
The Adventures of Pinocchio - 1883
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onceuponymous · 3 days ago
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daily affirmations:
i am kind
i am in control of my emotions
it does not bother me when someone is in the kitchen while i was planning to be in there alone
everyone in the house has the right to be in the kitchen
i am kind and in control of my emotions even when someone is in the kitchen while i was planning to be in there alone
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onceuponymous · 3 days ago
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So, fun fact about the skinned FurReal pony - I got the ID wrong, but only because Smores and Butterscotch's necks are semi-fixed in position, and I didn't think to google if the image I had of Butterscotch was mirrored.
The skinned horse IS Butterscotch, not Smores, but all of that's besides the point.
The reason I'm making this post is that y'all need to know that they skinned Butterscotch to turn her into a flamethrower
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onceuponymous · 3 days ago
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onceuponymous · 3 days ago
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onceuponymous · 4 days ago
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I did some more palette swaps
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onceuponymous · 5 days ago
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Naughty List Notes
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onceuponymous · 6 days ago
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rewatching the under the red hood movie and i gotta say as much as i love jason’s speech to bruce about how mad he is that the joker’s still alive, i still maintain that a severely underrated speech in this movie is from ra’s when he’s talking to bruce and in essence says ‘yeah so i hired the joker to distract you which was my bad because he totally went overboard and killed your son :/ and i felt so guilty i decided not to try and fight you anymore and then i stole your son’s corpse and tried to revive him via lazarus pit so i could like. make amends. except that was also my bad because we fucked that one up real good and when he came back out BOY was he weird in the head. killed my guys and then fucking jumped out a window and we lost him. my bad. and i thought he’d died again but apparently he’s in gotham and is like. totally destroying your whole lives which again, my bad. shouldn’t have tried to help. sorry about that. i’ll just stay out of your business from now on.’ which is actually the funniest characterisation of ra’s i’ve ever seen
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onceuponymous · 6 days ago
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eh, screw it *releases my fucked up vampire au from the confines of my mind*
anyway I decided my blog is for me and I can draw and post all the weird silly concepts of my dreams and nobody can stop me. I actually have a lot of potential comic ideas ping-ponging in my head for this AU — not a linear story or anything (beyond what's on this post), just some good fun and shenanigans.
bonus:
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onceuponymous · 6 days ago
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on the ethics of drinking your friends (what's the big deal???)
part of my Modern Vampire Marinette AU (intro | tag)
(Support me on ko-fi if you'd like!)
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onceuponymous · 7 days ago
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Trying to make canon make sense and just over and over coming to the conclusion that Bruce had a lot of misplaced confidence in his parenting ability. based off of how well Dick responded to him. B was coasting off of Mary and John’s hard work that even Bruce’s mistakes in mentoring/fathering couldn’t completely break down and then with Jason it’s like why the fuck aren’t you easy.
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onceuponymous · 7 days ago
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Apparently I never posted about the Angie Yonaga I made. She's cheaper than usual on my Etsy since she's an older creation
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onceuponymous · 7 days ago
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@thejakeformerlyknownasprince
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