opinionatedranting

[opinionatedranting]

Some Favorite Essays, Short Stories, Novels

Essays: 1. Helene Cixous - Laugh of Medusa  2. Anne Carson - Evil and Suffering in Modern Poetry  3. Kathy Acker - Myth of Romantic Suffering 4. Virginia Woolf - On Not Knowing Greek  5. Adrienne Rich - Women and Honor: Some Notes on Lying        - Adrienne Rich - Three Other Essays  6. Alice Walker - Looking for Zora  7. Anna Klobucka - Helene Cixous & Clarice Lispector 8. Joan Didion - On Self-Respect 9. Margaret Atwood - Am I a Bad Feminist?  10. Jeffrey Meyers - The Savage Experiment: Arthur Rimbaud 11. Jennifer Nash - Practicing Love  12. Paul J. M. van Tongeren - “A Splendid Failure” Nietzche Suffering 13. Albert Henrichs -  Loss of Self, Suffering, Violence: Dionysus 

Short Stories:  1. Clarice Lispector - Love  2. Anne Carson - 1 = 1 3. Margaret Atwood - Stone Mattress 4. Amy Bloom - Silver Water 5. Gunnhild Øyehaug - Same Time, Another Planet  6. Anne Carson - Back the Way you Went  7. Tatyana Tolstaya - Unnecessary Things 8.  Kirstin Valdez Quade - Christina the Astonishing (1150-1224) 9.  Clarice Lispector - One Day Less Novels: 1. Helene Cixous - Stigmata  2. Helene Cixous - Ex-Cities  3. Helene Cixous - Three Steps on the Ladder of Writing (my favorite) 4. Jean Genet - A Thief’s Journal (another link) 5. Judith Butler - Bodies that Matter 6. Clarice Lispector -  AGUA VIVA  (my favorite) Happy Holidays, friends. I hope you enjoy. - Love, E 

[opinionatedranting]

20,000 Follower Post | Writing Resource Dump!!

Thought this deserved an ounce of celebration and decided to finally release this list from my drafts folder!

In shaking the lint out of my bookmarks, I thought I’d gather all my writing related links into one list for you guys. Some of it is specific research for specific projects of mine, so it will seem random but also personal because many of you have been with me during the writing process. So, from me to you, I hope you find this useful!

Getting Started

How To Write A Captivating Opening Sentence 

3 Things You Must Have in Your Novel’s First Paragraph

What Makes an Amazing First Chapter?

5 Tactics Every Writer Should Know 

50 Questions for Your Outline 

10 Lessons I Learned While Writing My First Novel

15 Reasons Why Not to Become a Writer

Keep reading

[opinionatedranting]

“Writers - if you’re stuck on a scene and don’t know how get it done right, don’t be afraid to use filler[.] […] Just. Keep. Writing. You’ll figure it out. Sometimes all it takes is writing a later scene to crack it.“ (C. Robert Cargill)

[opinionatedranting]

Screenwriting tip: If you ever find yourself wondering “Where does my act II begin?” think of National Treasure. Think of Nicholas Cage gazing at the declaration of independence and murmuring “I’m gonna steal the declaration of independence” and then walking off like a dramatic hoe. Now look at your script. Where does your character decide to steal the declaration of independence? That is the start of your act II. You’re welcome.

[opinionatedranting]

DAVID LYNCH TEACHES CREATIVITY AND FILM - “Creativity and the Writing Process”

[opinionatedranting]

by David Corbett

The source and exact nature of the curious phenomena we refer to as characters remains something of a mystery, but the craft of characterization is not. 

Although it’s clearly a cause for celebration—or at least relief—when a character appears in the mind’s eye fully formed, the reality is that for most of us, this is a rare occurrence. Certain techniques are required to will our characters to life. We need to draw on the unconscious, memory, the imagination and the Muse until our characters quicken, assume clear form and, with hope, begin to act of their own accord. 

Can this process—so inherent to the success of any novel—really be condensed into a single method? In my experience as both writer and writing instructor, the answer is, to some extent, yes. The key is first to understand what your characters require from you in order to come to life, and then to determine how you can draw on your best available resources to give them what they need.

[opinionatedranting]

Does a protagonist has to have some kind of goal in a story in the beginning? My character doesn't really have goals at first but she does find one later in the story.

tl;dr: in the wise words of Kurt Vonnegut, “Every character should want something, even if it is only a glass of water.”

Usually, your character will have a goal, even if it’s a very simple one, one that goes against the direction of the story, or a self-destructive one. If she doesn’t have a goal for maybe a chapter or so, she will have a particular opinion or outlook on life that will face conflict, causing her to acquire a goal to remain true to these beliefs or overall world view. Otherwise, something will disrupt the status quo, and her goal will be something like, ‘to reinstate normality’.

You don’t say how much later in the story your character acquires her goal… but it would be difficult for a reader to go through several chapters of a character not really aiming for anything. 

So in short, I would recommend your character has some kind of goal, even if it’s not a very big one, and even if it changes to the goal she has at that ‘later’ point you’re referring to.

Recommendations / Examples

M.R. Carey’s Fellside (character lacking a goal, acquiring a goal, changing her goal).

Brave (2012), Disney Pixar (character with simple, routine goals, turned into a clearer goal after the inciting incident).

Jojo Moyes, Me Before You (unambitious character who develops goal after given a new opportunity in what was previously an uneventful life).

Nabari no Ou, by Yuhki Kamatani (apathetic character, very unwilling ‘goal-less’ protagonist for the most part).

Resources

Ask: Character Motivation

Proactive Vs Reactive Characters

Goals

I hope this helps…

- enlee

[opinionatedranting]

Degrassi S14E04: Can't Stop This Thing We Started

Oh, no. Oh, please no. Tell me we're not regressing back to Season 13 territory. That's the last thing Degrassi needs.

1. The Clare Plot:

Before: Does she seriously think nothing is going to change? Um, hello, Earth to Clare Edwards, a baby changes freaking everything!! Sweet Moses, this pregnancy storyline gets more and more ridiculous every day. Also, OMG YAY ELI IS COMING BACK I LOVE HIM. Writers you better not crush my Eclare shipping heart any more than you already have.

After: *simultaneously sobs and seethes with frustration* I hate this plot. I really really hate it. After I write this review my plan is to use my super-secret advanced alien technology to wipe this plot from existence because, dear god, it is annoying. Why do all the seniors on Degrassi have to get pregnant anyway? Uggghhhh. It's so pointless. It's being written so poorly. I don't think I even have the mental strength to write about it any longer. *takes deep calming breaths* Okay. I can do this. First off, I get why Clare hasn't told her mum or Eli (even though it's a cowardly move) but has Jenna completely vanished from the Degrassi-verse? Her and Connor are never seen. Literally. When was the last episode they were even mentioned in passing or seen in the background, let alone had their own plot? Jenna had a freaking baby. Surely Clare, being friends with Jenna, would've asked her for advice or something. But no. Because Degrassi writers seem to lack the most basic human characteristic: common sense. Another obvious mistake was when Audra was like, "Who's Eli?" Um, only one of your dead son's best friends. Honestly, Adam has been completely forgotten about since his death. Beckdam's epic romance had seemingly been wiped from everyone's minds, including Becky and Drew's, and now Adam's friendships are being forgotten too. Audra was talking to Clare like she didn't even know her. Surely they would've met a few times because of ADAM YES ADAM REMEMBER HIM? Actually, this episode did do a few things right. One, it made Drew actually talk sense. One of the only times I've actually agreed with him is when he was telling Clare that she can't just continue with her life as normal once the baby comes. And two, the Bhandallas scene at the Dot was just too cute. Glad to see not all the couples on Degrassi are based purely on the writer's nonsensical whims. (Just most of them.) Eli's face when he found out Drew was the father was heartbreaking, but when I think about it, I wouldn't expect any other reaction, and I find it stupid and selfish for Clare to either. I don't even want to bother with next week's episode, but I will because I'm a sucker for more Eli.

2. The Winston Plot:

Before: Yes Winston! "Everything was so much better before you got here!" Thank you for saying what everyone else was thinking. I hope Miles doesn't side with Tristan in this argument. I feel like Tristan is influencing him with his selfishness, and Miles is becoming more like him. I hope to god I'm wrong.

After: "Your shirt is ugly" is now officially my favourite insult. I quite liked how this portrayed how some people have real trouble telling their friends when they're upset. Tristan was even more annoying than usual in this episode. Boyfriend dibs? Bitch, that is so immature even 12-year-olds would frown on it. And Triles as a couple in general were less believable this week. They were just plain awkward. All the time. It's most likely the actors not being accustomed to interacting with each other in a couple-y way, but it might be something else, something to do with the actual characters. At least, that's what I think. I'm glad Miles and Winston aren't going to be going their separate ways anytime soon. Side note: Miles admitted that he's with Tristan because of Maya breaking his heart. I'm not sure what I think about this. I want Triles to be over because it's unhealthy, but I don't want Matlingsworth to re-start because, right now at least, it wouldn't be that healthy either. If it's messing with my head, I can't imagine how Miles feels about it all.

3. The Zig Plot:

Before: Zig feeling emasculated? This I have got to see.

After: I've got a mixed feelings about this. One on hand, I liked the don't-give-in-to-peer-pressure message but the guys-have-to-be-stronger-than-girls message was annoying and unnecessary. I feel like it tried to address how gender stereotyping affects guys as well as girls but it fell a bit flat in the end by being all oh yeah, Zig stood up for himself like a MAN. However, I do love Grace and everything to do with Grace so the scenes where she beat everyone at arm wrestling and bluffed about giving Zig a home tattoo I enjoyed quite a bit. I much prefer the Maya/Zig/Grace/Tiny friendship to any of the other sophomore friendships this year. I'm glad Maya has been able to get close to some people who won't suddenly turn around and stab her in the back. Isn't it ironic that, out of all the Grade 10s, the "troubled" kids are the nicest? It's kind of a reflection on society as a whole. Those who say what they think and stand up for themselves are frowned upon and shunned, whereas those who look pretty and perfect on the surface, but are as fake as the plastic their beloved credit cards are made out of, are treated with respect, fear, and almost glorified. Oh yeah, I'm getting deep today.

Guys. I really want to know who's going to guest star next week. I'm really hoping it will be Clare having a dream about/hallucinating about Adam, so he can tell her to get her shit together and deal with the fact that she has a foetus growing inside her. I just really miss Adam, okay?

[opinionatedranting]

Degrassi S14E03: If You Could Only See

Ack! I forgot to review Degrassi last week so I’m doing it now before the next episode airs and I officially get behind. Being completely honest, my main problem with Degrassi is the shitstorms it stirs up on the Internet, especially on the Wikia and Tumblr.

So here’s my fuel that I’m adding to the fire:

1. The Frankie Plot:

Before: Oh dear god, this will end so badly. Frankie and her self-esteem issues annoyed me in season 13 ‘cause that was basically the only episode she had a plot in so I didn’t know her at all and therefore didn’t care about her. Now we’ve seen more of her and, although I love Frankston, I’m still on the fence about Frankie. I suppose I’ll find out in this episode if she’s got character or not.

After: I feel like bashing my head with a brick. See, this is why I’m a feminist and completely against the sexist society we live in. Because it makes young girls believe that the only weapon they have is their bodies. Instead of using her brain to come up with a solution to her mother’s irrationality - another thing I hate about the patriarchy: women and girls who self-shame and shame other women and girls - Frankie thinks the only way she can get back at this fucked-up-ery is to let Zoe bully her into taking and sending nudes for money. ‘Cause, hey, at least that way she’s in control, right? Wrong! Zoe is the one controlling everything. Because Frankie is so upsettingly ignorant of what feminism actually is, she’s easily pushed into Zoe’s warped version of it. Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with sexting. If that’s what you’re into, and it’s not being done or distributed without your consent, then, great. I think it’s a great way for couples or even single people who just enjoy it to interact and be sexy with each other. But what it isn’t, is a business, a way to make money, a fucking fundraiser. Those are just cover-up names for what Zoe was kinda bullying all those cheerleaders into doing this episode, which is child pornography, and, yes, il-freaking-legal. She was essentially pimping them out! I felt so bad for Frankie, seeing her inner struggle with it all. What I said before, about nude photos being taken and/or distributed consentually? Yeah, consent wasn’t something that was running through Frankie’s mind when she eventually gave in and took the picture. And the thing that really gets me is that Zoe of all people shouldn’t be manipulating others into doing stuff they’re reluctant to. She could clearly see how uncomfortable Frankie was with the whole thing, and yet she ignored her just to get her own agenda going. I get that the reason she set it up was to take back the power from guys, and that her rape has deeply affected her, which is not at all surprising and very understandable, but she’s going completely the wrong way about it. For fuck’s sake, she’s taking advantage of girls that are younger than her, and deeply impressionable! That is not okay.

2. The Maya Plot:

Before: I’m really looking forward to this. In the last episode Maya showed real concern for Miles and it didn’t do much, as he was refusing to let anybody in. I hope he opens up to her this episode. I think Maya’s still upset over Cam’s death, which was just over a year ago in Degrassi time, so she’s seeing all these danger signs and this time she refuses to let the sufferer go through it alone. Maya has so grown on me.

After: My heart. It aches. Before I go into the utterly gut-wrenching compassion Maya has for people that are screaming for help but won’t say a word about it, can we talk about Zig, Grace and Tiny? I mean, because Maya is concerned about her ex, that means she’s automatically jealous or still in love with him or homophobic? It’s like they’ve never even met Maya. And the hallucination/daydream/whatever it was where Miles falls of the balcony thingy just like Cam did, which serves as a fantastic metaphor for what is happening in the real Degrassi world where Miles is on the edge and about to fall and Maya is the only person around who can see it but she can’t save him even though she’s desperately calling out to him. (I’m great with metaphors.) That next scene with her mother was heartbreaking. She reveals her dark fear: “What if he hurts himself?” The parallels to Cam grow stronger. She cares deeply for Miles and doesn’t want the same thing to happen to him.

3. The Becky Plot:

Before: I am so glad she’s decided to move on with her life and the catastrophe that was Drecky is over.

After: “There has to be a better guy out there for me than Drew.” No kidding! Becky, how can you not see that literally any guy is better than Drew (apart from maybe, like, Tristan, but luckily you don’t need to worry about him). Can I just say that even though I love Imogen and Jack, they annoyed me in that scene because they didn’t listen to why Becky was saying. She’s not who she once was, and I think any one of us can relate to that feeling and the irritation you get when people can’t seem to see it. Another thing I hated was the thing that was so obvious but nobody pointed out: even if Becky was still the same old Becky, that guy wouldn’t have been a good match for her anyway. We never end up with someone exactly like us, we need a partner who is different so the relationship isn't boring. Not as different as fucking Drew, though! Uggghhhh!!!! I thought Drecky was over!! It’s just so unnecessary and gross and bleck!! It stops me from being able to be articulate!

Afterthought: Grace is awesome, although she’s fallen down the ladder of admiration in this episode for helping to set up the Degrassi Nudes website. Her calling Zoe and Frankie “pom poms” was my favourite part of the episode.

[opinionatedranting]

Degrassi S14E02: Wise Up

This week's Degrassi was a discombobulated emotional rollercoaster. Everyone broke up, and out of all the break-ups, the most toxic one is the one that got back together.

1. The Miles Plot:

Before: OHHHHH CRAP. Shit's about to hit the fan. I hope my eyes deceived me and Mr. Hollingsworth isn't going to physically abuse Miles, 'cause if he is I will personally climb into my TV screen and claw his eyes out myself.

After: Miles. No. What. My heart bleeds for you. Please don't pretend everything is okay. I was so upset by the end of this episode I didn't know what to do with myself. A car is not an acceptable apology for what Miles' dad did. It's not even an apology at all, it's a bribe for Miles to keep his mouth shut. Even though it isn't, it has that feel of emotional blackmail. And I'm warming to Maya so so much this year. I think the main reason I disliked her before was because I hated her storylines, with stupid Zig and stupid Miles being all territorial and jealous and just basically fucking her life up. Now I can see that that was their fault, not hers. I really feel like a bitch for thinking she was just annoying when really all she ever tries to do is make the best out of a bad situation. She's so sweet, I'm baffled as to how anyone could actually hate her (although way too many people do, which is super unfair to her). And in this episode you can see her heart break into a thousand little pieces as Triles kiss, but she's more concerned with Miles' wellbeing than her own. My thoughts are that she feels guilty over Cam, and that she feels like there was something she could have done about it - even though she couldn't. She just wants everyone to be okay, or if not, then to at least realise when they need to ask for help. It's heartbreaking. And that's why Tristan annoyed me so much this episode. Because he only cared about himself, which is a recurring pattern with him. I know that he doesn't realise what he's doing, and how much it hurts other people, but it pisses me off so much. Miles was obviously very distressed when he was trying to talk to Tristan in the classroom, and Tristan just brushed him aside because he was upset about their relationship being outed, assuming it's all Miles' fault when really Miles had no control over the situation at all, and if Tristan had stuck around to listen to him, he would've known that. This is why I've been sceptical about Triles from the start. I just know Tristan is too selfish to be able to offer Miles the emotional support he needs, and Miles is too dependant on other people for Tristan. They're both issues they need to deal with, and until they do they shouldn't be in a relationship with anyone, much less each other. And finally, Miles' dad. What can I say about Miles' dad except that I really, really, really hate him. As if years of emotional abuse wasn't enough, he has now resorted to physical abuse as well. I also feel my anger extending towards the other Hollingsworth kids somewhat. I know it's not their fault, but they defend their father so strongly, even after witnessing how he treats their older brother on an almost daily basis. And then they even suggest that Miles defending himself is part of the problem, which is the worst possible thing you can say to a victim of abuse, accusing them of being to blame.

2. The Drew Plot:

Before: I can't be bothered with this Clew baby bullshit.

After: I can't be bothered with this Clew baby bullshit. (But at least the disaster that was Drecky is over now.)

3. The Zoe/Zig Plot:

Before: Please for the love of god, writers, if you do one good thing this season, do not break Novas up.

After: I... WHAT DID I JUST SAY??? THEY DIDN'T EVEN GET TOGETHER AND NOW YOU'VE TORN THEM APART!! *takes deep breath* Okay. This probably isn't the end of Novas. We still have Zig cheerleading to look forward to. I'm ready to be objective now. Zig has come so far since 13C. I disliked him to the end of the universe back them. To be honest, ever since he was first introduced I've never been more than neutral towards him. But since he got out of the gang, got over Maya (and himself), and saved Zoe when she was at her lowest point, my respect and love for him have only grown. His cluelessness in this episode was stretching it a bit, though, and if I were Zoe, I would've been annoyed too. That's what I love about her, though, she doesn't take any shit. And even though she said it's over, I have a feeling that will only push Zig to do something even bigger and better to prove to her that he's worth her. (I just really want Novas, okay? And that cheerleading scene.)

[opinionatedranting]

"The Maze Runner" by James Dashner

Over the past couple of years I’ve been really annoyed by the abundance of mediocre future sci-fi apocalyptic YA novels that have been unworthily deemed “genius”. So I was very sceptical and cynical before I read “The Maze Runner”. However, I was itching to see the film as I love Kaya Scodelario and Thomas Brodie-Sangster, and the last time I saw a film before reading the book (“The Hunger Games”) I regretted it so much I refused to ever do it again. I truly have learned from my mistakes, because I’ve just finished the book and I just know there is no way the movie will live up to it. (I’m still going to see it, though. Obviously.)

My mind was very closed at the beginning of this book, and I was even more concerned with how it was going to turn out when I noticed it was written in third-person. I have a very biased disdain of books written in third-person, with a few notable exemptions whose plot and characters and writing style make up for it (the “Harry Potter” books, and also anything written by Michael Grant). Because most of them have a really hard time getting into the heads of the main character. Obviously a lot of first-person books do a terrible job of conveying their thoughts and feelings too, and god knows I’ve ploughed my way through enough of them to realise that, but the good ones make me feel more connected to the main character somehow. Anyway, whatever the case, after the first few pages I already disliked “The Maze Runner”. I was annoyed that nothing was being explained, that none of the Gladers would tell Thomas anything, that the story was not moving at all.

Of course, that was before the story started moving. Which it started to do after just a chapter or two, with the arrival of Teresa. I was also irritated by her. She was initially described as “beautiful.” Ugh. Why is that her most notable quality? Anyway, I don’t really care that much about her introduction now, after finishing the book, because she does prove herself as more than a pretty face throughout the rest of the story. Her and Thomas’ telepathic bond was stretching the boundaries of even the world of the Glade, but I warmed to it along with Thomas.

And over the course of the book, I warmed to everything else as well. I started to really enjoy the plot, after the night in the Maze where Thomas not only managed to keep himself alive, but Alby as well, and proved himself to Minho. And I liked the characters a lot more, except Gally obviously. Especially when Thomas reveals they’ve all been named after famous intellects (though I desperately hope that doesn’t mean Teresa was nicknamed after the Mother Teresa, cause that would definitely put a damper on it.)

I do this thing where I let a thought about a plot in a book or a film or a TV show pop into my head, but I don’t really dwell on it because I’d rather just learn the story as the characters do. More often than not, my little thoughts are correct. And I hate people who are all “I guessed the twist!” but I did actually guess that Thomas would get stung by a Griever on purpose. I mean, it just seemed the most logical thing to do. You can’t remember anything, how you got here, who you are, who put you here. Going through the Changing gives you your memories back, if only for a while. So what are you going to do? Get stung by a Griever so you’ll be given the Serum and be able to remember. I mean, why would you not do it? (Yeah, I know insufferable pain, yadda yadda yadda.)

I also wasn’t very surprised that Thomas and Teresa had helped build the Maze. It was very heavily foreshadowed. Then again, I have a feeling that was on purpose. There didn’t need to be that many surprises, that way the big ones would stand out. Like Alby sacrificing himself. And Gally being alive. And Chuck saving Thomas’ life but losing his own in the process. Wow, I’m the spoiler queen today, huh?

There really were a lot of central characters killed off in this first book of the trilogy. It makes me wonder if anyone but Thomas (and maybe Teresa) will make it out of this alive. I suppose I’ll have to read the next two books and find out.

I usually refrain from shipping book characters that much. The ones I do ship are always canon. (Well, nearly all my OTPs from movies and TV are canon too. Yeah, I’m boring, I know.) So for now I’m not going to invest myself in Newt/Thomas. However, after I’ve seen the film - and read the other books - my mind will probably change. I mean, come on, Newt calls Thomas “Tommy”. And Thomas even told Teresa that Newt was the only other person besides her that had a nickname for him. And she’s the supposed love interest, so … Yeah, I’m grasping at straws, but whatever. You know you secretly want it to happen, too.

I just need more, like, yesterday. I’m sorry this was quite a bit shorter than usual, but all I can think is: “The Scorch Trials, The Scorch Trials, THE SCORCH TRIALS, THE SCORCH TRIALS, THESCORCHTRIALS!!!!”

Ahem. So I’m gonna go read that.

[opinionatedranting]

Degrassi S14E01: Smells Like Teen Spirit

So, it's back, and I'm still as conflicted as ever about it. Is it getting better than the trainwreck that was season 13, or will it continue with it's mediocrity this year? Well, if the first episode's anything to go on... Yeah, I still have no fucking clue. This show is confusing.

1. The Clare Plot:

Before: Who's the father? IT BETTER NOT BE FUCKING DREW. I wonder if she'll keep the baby. An abortion storyline would be interesting considering Clare used to be (and still is, even though Becky kind of took over the role) the über-Christian of the school. Also, what about a miscarriage? That would be something new, and it makes sense as the statistics say that 1 in 3 pregnancies end in miscarriage, so it's a lot more common than people think. (Then again, we are talking about Degrassi here. What does and doesn't make sense seems to be of absolutely no importance.)

After: Right. Well. That made no sense whatsoever. So, first Clare is super-decided, like, "OK, I have a foetus inside me, it has to go." And she doesn't even question her decision until she goes to the hospital? I have a hard time believing that if the spotting hadn't happened, she would've just gone through with the abortion without thinking twice. That is not the Clare Edwards I know. But of course, she does decide she can't get rid of it, and now the drama shall unfold, and the Clew baby plot will undoubtedly be as annoying and unnecessary as the Clew plot was.

2. The Miles Plot:

Before: So I'm pretty sure one of the only good things that will come out of Triles is Miles dealing with his dad's disapproval. He's gone so long hating his dad and now he's trying to live up to his unattainable expectations so I want to see what happens when Miles decides he's had enough of the verbal abuse and bullshit that his dad comes up with.

After: You go Miles! It's time the world found out what an asshole your dad is. That'll ruin his campaign for sure, and boy does he deserve it. Not to mention Sassy!Miles at breakfast and his refusal of being labelled. (But seriously. He couldn't have found a better boyfriend than Tristan? I still haven't forgiven that little bitch for how he went off on Maya like that last season.)

3. The Becky/Zoe Plot:

Before: Zoe's gonna do WHAT? This looks scary.

After: Uggghhh. I have so many thoughts on this. First off, what the actual hell Becky? All that character development over the last two seasons and now you're back to your judgemental, grudge-bearing ways. Zoe did NOTHING to you. She was the VICTIM. How would you feel if you were in her position? You have no fucking right to be so self-serving. What's with the whole, "Cheerleading is my thing," attitude? Cheerleading is a GROUP ACTIVITY. It is about a TEAM. You are not the centre of the freaking universe. Get your head out of your ass, pronto. On the other hand, the way Zoe dealt with it was totally out of line. I'm not really that concerned about how it made Becky feel, but what about Clare? Even though she's annoying as fuck, Zoe had no right to tell anyone her secret. Again, it goes back to the "how would you feel if that happened to you?" situation. Empathy, man. These girls are severely lacking it. It wasn't Zoe's fault that Becky got distracted by what she said and fell, but she was so cold about it afterwards. "Ooohhh, goodie, now I can get on the team!" Like, no. Go and see if she's all right. Jesus Christ.

However, there were some parts of this episode that I loved. Novas, in particular. That sexual tension is getting louder by the minute. And just the Zoe/Maya/Zig friendship in particular. Now that Zig isn't hung up on Maya anymore, and Maya and Zoe are not at each other's throats, I much prefer it to the Zoe/Maya/Tristan friendship. I still don't get why Zoe is friends with Tristan though. But I guess that's for her to decide.

And Dallas' practically only line: "Why do I have to be the guy that notices everything?" GOLD.

[opinionatedranting]

Wizards vs Aliens S03E01-02: The Secret of Room 12

IT'S BACK!! And it surprised me, because I thought either the Nekross would return despite the series 2 finale, or there would be an all new species of antagonist aliens altogether. I was wrong, because it wasn't just one of those things - they both happened!

First off, I have to admit that the main reason I was so exited for series 3 is Benny. I want to see him go on his first date! I also wanted to know if my theory/number one wish of Quinn/Benny would happen. I felt a bit let down that neither of these things happened in this episode, but I'm still holding out hope for them to happen in the future. And I actually sort of get why they haven't happened yet, because the name of the show is "Wizards vs Aliens", not "Benny's Love Life".

Another thing that upset me but which I was, quite frankly, expecting, was the lack of Lexi. "The Thirteenth Floor" both broke my heart and made me a crazy Tom/Lexi shipper. And even though Tom made her human and sent her to Benny Jr. at the end of last series, I was still sort of hoping she'd return in series 3. But alas, there go those pesky writers, proving me wrong yet again.

(I'm totally kidding, the writers aren't pesky, I love them and I love "Wizards vs Aliens" and I wish for many, many episodes in the future.)

So, Varg got married. I can't stress enough how much his wife annoys me. She's like a little slug. And that bird! Ugh. I think I'll hold back an opinionated rant on them for now, otherwise it'd overshadow the rest of the review, and there were much better and more important parts of the episode that I'd rather focus on.

For example, the Prospector, an entirely new alien who works for something called "the Consolidation", an exciting new development that extract the cores out of selected planets and then sells them. I'm very intrigued to find out more about this Consolidation. I also want to know if the Prospector got disintegrated or merely beamed back home (wherever his "home" is). It'll be cool to see him reappear as he was quite an interesting character and I want to find out more about him.

I've really missed Tom and Benny being best buddies. Their friendship has always been one of my favourite aspects of the show, and I was glad to see it again just a few minutes into the episode. I'm happy that Benny got to go to M.I.T., I can just imagine him geeking out over all their equipment (which he basically does as soon as Tom asks him about it). And, Quinn not knowing what M.I.T. is - that was adorable. Benny just getting exasperated, like: "It's famous!" My little heart was singing. My mouth my have let out a little squeak also.

I don't invest all my emotions in fictional characters and who I think their soulmate is. What? Where did you even hear that? *cough*

Moving swiftly on...

Is it just me or has Ursula become more easily shaken? Not necessarily weaker, just less "oh-that?-that's-just-an-alien-they're-stupid-don't-worry-about-them-we're-fucking-wizards". I mean, she gets startled by a little banshee. And then, when Benny goes to find her and he's all "Ahhhhh there is a great danger HELP!" like he's done every week since he met Tom, she just freaks out too. Although, I have to say, I think that was only the first half of the episode, because she was super-cool when she dealt with the Prospector. I loved the love spell, it was a clever way to get rid of him. And her attitude towards him being disintegrated/teleported away was so awesomely blasé. "Oh, it never would've worked out." I hope that Ursula is the one who stays for the remainder of the series, not the scaredy-cat one from the beginning.

Finally, I do like Katie, and her and Tom's relationship is cute, I guess, but they really have to expand on it, because right now there is no reason for them being together and also Katie's character is quite underdeveloped. We don't know what things they have in common, how they became friends, how long they've known each other, or even what attracted them to each other in the first place. I could jump on the Katie/Tom ship, and I can see myself doing so in the future, but only if it evolves from a rotten plank of wood that can't support the weight of a sparrow to a big yacht worth a million pounds. Or, even just, like, a dingy. That would be a vast improvement.

[opinionatedranting]

How to Get Away with Murder S01E05: We're Not Friends

Last week's cliffhanger made me yearn for more HTGAWM like it was a drug and I was an addict (which, let's be real, is the relationship between most good TV shows and their fans), but this week's gave me chills. Actual chills. So right now I'm in less of a craving more state, and more of an enjoying the high while it lasts state. Because those last two minutes were phenomenal.

Let me just say that the thing which really makes this show the masterpiece that it is - besides the plot - is the acting. It's pretty safe to say that the actors in something can make or break it, which is usually the case with a lot of TV shows and movies. HTGAWM has particularly great writing, but you can't deny that if the lines aren't delivered in the right way, with the right tone of voice and the right spark in the eye, that no matter how shocking or profound they are, they won't have the same effect.

So, without further ado (or gushing praise for the actors and actresses that do such a great job at bringing this thriller/mystery to life) let's look at this week's storyline.

The case was about a seventeen-year-old who shot his father after years and years of watching his mother get beaten by him. It was surprising, in the sense that up until now I haven't cared at all whether Annalise's clients get found guilty or not. This week, I did. Because this week the defendant wasn't actually a bad person, just someone who had done nothing for so long that they had finally been driven to the most extreme solution to a horrible problem. It makes for a nice change from people who just want to save their own skin.

I have to admit, I just don't get the whole Laurel/Frank thing. To me it just seems weird, a guy essentially giving a student he has the hots for an opportunity so she will then feel indebted to him. At least, that's how I see it. We learnt literally nothing about Frank this episode, he remains as boring as ever. The only thing we've been told about him is the fact that he sleeps with his students, of which we were informed in, like, his second scene in the first episode. If that's someone's defining characteristic, I just can't see how they could be beneficial in any way to those around them. But hey, maybe that's just me.

As for Laurel, we did learn more about her this episode. But it was kinda stuff we already knew. Like that she'd slept with Frank sometime before the bonfire. I mean, duh. And ... oh wait, that basically all we found out about her. I guess you could count the whole jury nullification thing as her being resourceful or whatever, but to me it seemed like a stupid and risky move. She could easily have been seen and they would have lost the case instantly, not to mention she'd lose her spot in the team and probably her place at law school too. 

Is it clear that I don't really like Laurel? It's not that I hate her or anything, I just find her to be the most boring character of them all, with the exception maybe of Asher, who, like Frank, we know nothing about. I don't know, I guess I'm just hoping that in future episodes Laurel will start to really flesh out as a character and my feelings towards her will change from annoyance to anything else. I'd rather have someone who's easy to hate than someone who's just sort of pointlessly ... there.

Okay, so, the phone. The photo on the phone. Annalise and Sam's confrontation. Oh my gosh, how heartbreaking that was. And then it went from heartbreaking to full on ugh-I-hate-you-Sam-listen-to-your-wife-and-let-go-of-her-you're-being-crazy-and-borderline-abusive-why-are-you-even-on-this-show-you-suck. Seriously, over the course of this episode I went from hating him, to realising my hate is wasted on him because he's despicable and it won't change anything, to just giving up and not giving a fuck, to hating him again for scaring Rebecca so much, to wishing he didn't exist.

I'll stop ranting about him now 'cause it's clouding my judgement of the storyline and making me hate him again which is pointless.

Right, I get why Annalise doesn't want her husband to go to prison, but at the same time I wish she'd just tell the truth and give the evidence to the police, if only to prove Rebecca's innocence (and also get herself some sweet, sweet revenge). But I learned a long time ago that I can't control fictional characters by shouting at my laptop screen/tv/Kindle/rare book made out of actual paper, so all I could so was watch her break down as she wrestles with all this information that has been kept from her. Plus, she has one friend stab her in the back and another lie to her about who told the jury about nullification. She has to put up with constantly being lied to. The whole way through my heart just ached for her.

This episode also has bits of humour scattered here and there. Now that Asher has realised Connor is gay - silly Asher, so slow - he's all "tell me all your secrets, I want your website but for straight people, please just be my friend". Okay, well, maybe not exactly like that, but their ten-second conversations are pretty funny, especially when Michaela starts to talk too and Connor's just like: "We're not friends." Hence the title of the episode.

But that still wasn't the best part.

The ending. The cliffhanger that isn't really that much of a cliffhanger because we all think we know what'll happen anyway (big Wes/Annalise confrontation). But that doesn't make it any less dramatic. Or any less awesome.

Wes returns to his building to find Rebecca's door open with the keys still in the lock, and all her belongings gone. So he calls her to find out what happened, and she gives him a hint. The wallpaper. She'd seen it earlier that day when Annalise had invited her over so Sam find out if Rebecca knew it was him on Lila's phone (ironically) under the guise of giving her a psychological evaluation. It was the same wallpaper as the one in the photo.

So Wes goes to the Keating residence to see it for himself. Annalise jumps at seeing him in her house and demands to know what he's doing there. The tension and the music rise, and Wes looks at the wallpaper, and, whaddya know, Rebecca was right. "The picture on Lila's phone ... it was taken here. Your husband's Mr. Darcy." And boom. Thend. 

It was fucking spectacular.

[opinionatedranting]

"The Manifesto on How to be Interesting" by Holly Bourne

I'm usually quite a fast reader, I have in the past read a book in a day (most recently "Messenger of Fear" by Michael Grant) but a testimony to how good "The Manifesto on How to be Interesting" was is that I finished it in just one sitting. The last time I did that was when I read "Fangirl" by Rainbow Rowell, which is one of my favourite books. And now, so is "The Manifesto".

When she first mentioned Logan Fellows, I had an annoyed feeling. I felt like it was one of two possibilities. Either,

a) Bree had a massive crush on her teacher and was going to be all pathetic and mopey about it during the whole book, or

b) Bree was having an affair with her teacher and was going to be all lovey-dovey and immature about it during the whole book.

I was relieved when it was neither. Or rather, when it was a bit of both, but instead of being annoyed at the storyline, I actually enjoyed it. Because while I was reading "The Manifesto", I was feeling everything that Bree was. A lot of the time with third-person narratives I feel detached from the main character because I don't feel like I'm seeing the world through their eyes, rather, through the invisible narrator's eyes, like when you watch a film. And what I love so much about reading is that you can get inside someone else's head. So third-person narratives often don't connect with me on the same level as they would if they were first-person narratives. But "The Manifesto" did. (The similarities to "Fangirl" increase.)

In mostly all YA books, even ones that tackle big, important issues and/or have a strong storyline that isn't about romance, the main character ends up with their love interest. What I love about "The Manifesto" is that that didn't happen. One of Bree's many realisations at the end of the novel is that she does not need to be in love to be happy. This is especially important as, when she and Logan are together, she says that he makes her feel happier than she has ever felt. Of course, that's not healthy, as a lot of people know, because it's vital to be happy when you're alone before you can be happy with someone else.

The self-harm storyline was so very well done. It doesn't make it too graphic for squeamish readers, as the scenes wherein Bree actually cuts herself were not shown in the book. It does, however, describe her feeling of emptiness, of being so numb that she just wants to feel something, so she chooses to feel pain because at least she can control that.

There's a bit about control in "The Manifesto". A while after Bree begins her quest to be interesting, things start to tumble out of her control, and she desperately clings to her exercise sessions with her mother as she says they're the only thing left in her life she can fully control. It's not explored very much, it's not explicitly stated that Bree is a control-freak, but there are definitely some strong hints.

Bree's mum is a character I honestly despised at the beginning. On the surface she's one of those mothers who put their daughters down by telling them what to eat to be skinnier, what to wear to look nicer, what to do to be popular, and are constantly disappointed in them. Another attribute to how amazing the writing is, as this is exactly how Bree feels about her. But as the story progressed, both myself and Bree found out that her mum really wanted to spend time with her and care for her, and actually loved her a lot. Bree's mum gives her help with becoming "attractive" and "popular", and gives her advice when Bree talks to her about Hugo, the guy at her school that every girl is in love with. And at the end, she helps Bree pick herself up, and move on with her life, and not be a victim, along with Bree's father.

He was a much less developed character as he was absent for most of the book, in the same way that he was absent for most of Bree's life, being a workaholic who is never at home. However, by the end I could tell that he really does love his family, and they really do love him back. My lack of respect for him dissipated as soon as he told Bree to stick up for herself and not be a victim. Her mum was completely willing to let her walk away from her problems so she wouldn't have to deal with any more pain, which is completely understandable for a parent, but her dad knew that it would be better for her in the long run to face her demons and fight them for all she was worth.

Which she did.

And it was awesome.

I loved loved LOVED that scene where Hugo and Bree have a stand-off in the from room. Bree was so fricking cool even though she was "jelly" inside. I admired her so much in that scene. And, of course, in the February fifteenth canteen scene.

Okay, I've ranted for long enough without mentioning the "perfect posse", which are one of the most important parts of "The Manifesto". Those girls who rule the school, who everyone admires and loathes in equal measure, who everyone secretly longs to be, or even just be friends with.

Bree manages to do both. She pretends to be completely uninterested at first, when Jassmine invites her to a girly night at her house after admiring her über-trendy lipstick (courtesy of Bree's amazing mum) and practically falling over herself to be closer to Bree, who is now on the same power level as her thanks to her makeover that previous weekend (again, thank you mother dearest). And, just like that, by being snarky and a tad bitchy - just enough to get away with it - Bree is in with the perfect posse.

And she discovers that they are actually human and have real feelings and emotions and she shouldn't be blogging about everything she's learnt about them and she probably shouldn't have slept with Jassmine's boyfriend Hugo just to be interesting. Unfortunately, she realises this far too late, after Hugo has shown the whole school the video he made of them without her even being aware of it.

Hugo is such a pig. From his very first scene, I hated him. I mean, who actually uses the word "gash"? And in every other sentence! Sorry, I don't care how good-looking he is, please get that boy away from all girls everywhere. He constantly cheats on Jassmine, who actually loves him a lot, and isn't that evil on the inside, so doesn't deserve it at all. And the way he treats Bree is bordering on sexual assault. It's most certainly sexual harassment. I want to grab a hammer that has "NO MEANS NO" written on it and smash it into his narcissistic skull.

Finally, lets talk about Holdo. He annoyed me at the beginning. Because he annoyed Bree. (Have I mentioned how great a writer Holly Bourne is yet? This is the last time, I promise.) He was hardly in the book as Bree becoming "interesting" - A.K.A.: a complete and utter bitch - was bullshit and he wasn't going to stand for it. But when he reappeared at the end I was glad (because Bree was glad, yes). He was a tad too pretentious for my liking, but he more than made up for that by showing Bree how much of a success her blog was.

There were just so many emotions that I felt while reading this book. But that scene where Bree reads all the adorable comments and finds out she has 45,597 e-mails from people who read her blog and also one from a publishing company made me so ecstatic. It was the high point of the book, and it uplifted me, making me feel like all the shit Bree had been through was actually made sort of kind of worthwhile. Not like it was all worth it, but like something good had come out of an awful situation. Never has such an optimistic thing resonated with me so much (I'm the queen of the pessimists).

So you can see why I adore this book. It was so goddamn fantastic and I related to it so well and I have no more intelligent comments so I'm going to stop here before I just start blathering on about how spectacular it is and how much I love it.

Oh wait, I've already done that. Oh well.

[opinionatedranting]

Finding Carter S01E05: The Heat

So I watched the four previous episodes last week after seeing a picture of Kathryn Prescott in something I hadn't seen of hers yet and well I absolutely adored her in Skins so I immediately decided I needed to watch it.

I did consider writing reviews for all the episodes so far, and I might actually do that at some point in the future, but for now I can't be bothered.

Let me start by saying that this episode made me laugh out loud on more than one occasion, and made me want to punch my screen more than five times. I'm not used to having such mixed feelings about a show. Let's start with the good at work our way to the dreadful, shall we?

1. Carter's not such a brat:

I have to say, I never disliked Carter, I knew she was just being a rebellious teenager who wants to find the woman who raised her while being essentially trapped with a bunch of strangers. But I was glad when she seemed to sort of, I don't know, mellow? Yeah, in this episode she mellowed. She's still got an attitude, she's still in pain, she still feels like her world has been completely turned upside down, but she's dealing with it all a little bit better. And I know she was only being nice to Elizabeth to find out stuff about and/or get her to stop tracking down Lori, but by the end I think she really was grateful that Elizabeth was trying harder.

2. Max and Taylor loveliness:

I like that the writers decided not to drag out the Carter/Gabe/Taylor love triangle for more than a couple of episodes, because it was really starting to annoy me, as all love triangles do if they're not dealt with quickly. And Max is definitely one of my four favourite characters on the show - the other three being Grant, Ofe and David. And he and Taylor balance each other out so adorably. I loved the scene where he was trying to help her with her SAT vocab, and then when he literally picked her up and carried her out of the room in a way that was both insanely unromantic and outstandingly cute. I laughed out loud when Carter walked in on them making out in Taylor's room near the end of the episode. Her reaction was probably exactly the same as mine would have been. (Well, okay, I would have thrown my arms in the air and yelled "OTP!" Then I would've done what Carter did.) And speaking of Taylor kisses...

3. The seven minutes in Heaven with Ofe and Gabe:

Ofe is literally someone who would be my best friend. You know, if he were real. I loved him teaching Taylor how to kiss. Gabe had no idea what the fuck he was letting himself in for. This dialogue after his seven minutes with Taylor though:

          Bird: "What happened in there, guys?"

          Gabe: "I don't know. I don't know ... what that was."

          Ofe: "I taught her everything she knows."

          Gabe: "I owe you."

4. David not taking any more of Elizabeth's shit:

The scene where they're watching the movie and then her phone rings could have been heartbreaking if we'd known the characters longer. Another thing is they keep telling us that before Carter was abducted Elizabeth was completely different, but we've never actually seen that side of her yet, so it's hard to care about her at all. Which is why I was so happy when David was like fuck this and left the room. Hopefully he'll also leave the marriage before too long. And his literary agent, Toby, is HILARIOUS.

          David: "Should I do it before or after I tell her I want a divorce?"

          Toby: "Gasp! Embellish."

          David: "She's cheating on me."

          Toby: "Double gasp."

          David: "For the second time."

          Toby: "Go on."

5. Grant's movie girlfriend:

Carter calling Grant "armadillo". AND THE FREAKING EUPHEMISMS!!!! That is all.

And now for the not-so-good parts.

6. Bird being irritating:

Seriously, what's up with this girl? It's so upsetting because I really liked her up until this episode. Even in the last one I liked her because she wouldn't let Carter boss her around like everyone else did, especially after Carter insulted her art. I'd call her a jealous paranoid girlfriend, but she's not even dating Crash, so I've got no fucking clue what that makes her. What, was she trying to intimidate Carter or something? It wasn't intimidating, it was just plain annoying, seeing as Carter kept saying she wasn't interested in Crash anyway. I swear she said that like seven times throughout the episode because she got questioned about it so much. (And okay maybe she was lying considering next episode's trailer but if you disregard that and only focus on this episode, I'd say she made her feelings pretty clear. And people don't just snap their fingers and fall for someone, it happens over time - usually - so it's completely probable that Carter doesn't even realise her own feelings because they're not big enough or important enough to be noticed yet.)

7. The dead body:

I'm sorry, I know a lot of people will say that this was a big moment in Carter's life and all that stuff but I just really didn't like the way it was done. The viewer is supposed to experience what the characters are feeling and thinking, and I just didn't. I think it's because we have so many crime dramas and murder mysteries on TV nowadays so seeing a dead body on a screen is just something we've grown used to. Obviously seeing one up close and personal is a completely different experience, but Carter was the one going through it, and not me, the audience. All I was seeing was Carter seeing something and having feelings about it. It didn't make me feel anything at all. 

8. Lori:

In the first episode, I liked Lori a lot. I thought she was a cool mother and when they were like "she abducted you" it didn't make me think any less of her. Probably mostly because I hadn't actually seen her do anything evil yet. When TV shows tell me things about characters instead of showing me those things, I find I don't care as much, if at all. (Sort of how, for most of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., the characters kept saying Skye was amazing and stuff, but we never got to actually see her being amazing and stuff until the last few episodes. But that's for another post.) The thing is, once they started showing Lori tracking down Max, being all desperate and slightly deranged, doing everything she can to get Carter back, that's when I started believing that she could be the sort of person to steal a three-year-old girl from her family. And I didn't like that person. Like Max said, she selfishly made him an accomplice, and she's trying to repeat the same crime she committed 13 years ago, and it's just totally messed up. As much as I hate Elizabeth, Lori is no better.

[opinionatedranting]

Degrassi S13E39-40: Thunderstruck

I just saw the Degrassi season 13 finale.

What I thought - before watching the episode and after:

1. The Tristan/Miles Plot: 

Before: Oh god no, not Triles. Miles is so dependent on relationships and other people, he needs time to stand on his own two feet and survive without a girlfriend/boyfriend. Also, I hate Tristan 'cause of how much of a bitch he was to Maya about the whole Yates thing. Plus, he needs a break from dating too.

After: Most of the plot was what I predicted - flirting; Winston being awesome and telling Miles to stop messing around with people's feelings; Miles ignoring him and kissing Tristan anyway. But. The pool scene. Tristan was surprisingly mature, accepting that the kiss didn't have to mean anything and that they could just move on and forget it, and Miles was truthful about his behaviour and feelings for once. I actually believe that both Miles and Tristan have genuine feelings for each other. I hope they can sort of take things slow and that the writers won't screw it up (even though they undoubtedly will). I didn't like how it came out of nowhere. I mean yes there was the crush on Tristan's behalf in Paris but that was over half a year ago and was never brought up again until this episode. It felt rushed. Plus the thing I said before about neither of them being in the right place to start a relationship now. So I ship it, but I know it will end and I'll be glad when it does.

2. The Eli/Clare Plot:

Before: YES!! Omigosh Eli is back! And Clare is gonna see him! And he's not over her! My OTP together again! Probably! (Honestly I didn't care how it worked plot-wise, I was too giddy about Eclare returning to think about that.)

After: Daaaawwwww. They so cute. The awkward "where will we both sleep?" scene. The adorable kebab scene. The post-Columbia-interview-I'm-not-over-you scene. I was so happy to see Eli and Clare hanging out together after so long. The last time they had a lovely, angst-free conversation was back in season 12, and I was so glad to see that side to them again. Add to that the possibly very likely getting back together bit, and it was easily my second favourite plot of the episode (after Imogen's).

3. The Zoe/Maya Plot:

Before: Oh great. Just when I thought their friendship was improving, Zig goes and acts like an idiot. Can't wait for the inevitably annoying catfight that is sure to follow.

After: Maya annoyed me, right until the make-up scene. I get that she was drunk, but drunk people do annoying things. That doesn't make them any less annoying just because they're drunk. I'll be honest, I've not been Maya's biggest fan up until the last few episodes of season 13. I never disliked her, I just never really liked her either. (I did, however, admire her for telling Mr. Simpson about Yates and for ending things with Miles during Zoe's trial. As I've said before, as much as I love him, that boy needs to learn to be independent.) I feel like Zoe has really grown as a character towards the end of season 13. She was outstanding in the previous two-part episode, which centred around her trial. And she followed Maya out into the storm even after Zig said he would, when she could have just let him go and stayed warm and dry and safe in the Matlin house. But she didn't and she probably saved Maya's life, when Maya was saying all those mean (yet true) things about her. And when they solved all their issues I thought to myself: Hallelujah. Seriously. I'm so glad they're trying to be friends and move past all the bitchy things they've done to each other. Both of them are really great characters and I can see this as the beginning to a beautiful friendship.

4. The Becky/Drew Plot:

Before: WHY DO YOU HATE ME, DEGRASSI WRITERS? DRECKY IS SUCH A NO-GO ZONE. HELLO? REMEMBER ADAM? WHY ARE YOU PUTTING THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE AND HIS BROTHER INTO A NEAR-DEATH SITUATION TOGETHER? I AM SO DONE.

After: WHY DO YOU HATE ME, DEGRASSI WRITERS? DRECKY IS SUCH A NO-GO ZONE. HELLO? REMEMBER ADAM? WHY ARE YOU PUTTING THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE AND HIS BROTHER INTO A NEAR-DEATH SITUATION TOGETHER? I AM SO DONE.

And now for the things that weren't in any trailers so were a pleasant (or unpleasant) surprise.

5. The Frankie/Winston/Miles Minor-Plot:

After: Silly Miles. You really think it's Winston's fault that you and Maya didn't get back together? *Sigh* When will you realise you rely too much on other people for your own personal happiness and that you (maybe) have Dependent Personality Disorder and should get some help? I couldn't decide whether Frankie and Miles fighting like real-life siblings was adorable or scary. It certainly was funny. The charades game made me confused as to whether their rivalry was just normal brotherly-sisterly or if it actually runs deeper than that. And Winston being a total boss and laying the truth on Miles about how he always ends up hurting the people he cares about was epic. 

6. The Imogen Minor-Plot:

After: All of the scenes with Imogen in them were pure gold! Her dramatic warning about global warming. When she said: "Why does no-one ever take me seriously?" wearing that adorkable rainwear. Her and Dallas dancing to Mambo Number Five to cheer Becky up. How incredibly worried she was about Becky going missing. And just all the Jackogen cuteness. Not to mention the scene near the end when she's just going around randomly saying "I love you" to everyone and everything. (Plus her cherry outfit for the dance was THE BEST.) My favourite plot of the whole episode.

7. The Zig/Grace/Zoe/Maya Minor-Plot:

After: Even though Zig was only in a little bit of the first half of this episode, and Grace was in it even less, I loved their scenes. Grace making him realise that he just unknowingly invited two girls to the dance, and him being totally confused when she explained to him why it's such a bad idea, with the Maya/Zoe history. And then when she suggests using alcohol to diffuse the tension between the two girls and he actually does it. That Never Have I Ever scene was funny then turned sad. I found it weird that there wasn't any Zig/Zoe/Maya scene at the end, after the storm, but I guess they could only fit so much into the 43 minutes or however long it was. And I was sooo disappointed that there wasn't much - if any - Novas action at all. Not even a kiss! Man, I just ship Zig and Zoe SO HARD.

8. The Dallas/Drew Minor-Plot:

After: Dallas, I am disappointed in you. Shipping Drecky? Really? You almost made up for that by this, the best conversation of the episode (maybe even the season):

          Dallas: "You're not even dating the girl and you still manage to put her life in danger?"

          Drew: "Dallas, I may suck at dating but I don't put anyone's life in danger!"

          Dallas: "Didn't Bianca almost get killed by a gang, like twice?"

Annndddd, OF COURSE...

9. The Clare Major-Plot:

After: That pole scene was hilarious. Also, yay! She got into Columbia! And Eli! Oh, what's that, Degrassi writers? You can't just leave this episode be, sort of half-amazing, half-awful? You have to put the final nail in the proverbial coffin that this season has become? YOU'RE GOING TO RUIN CLARE'S HAPPINESS AND SAY SHE'S PREGNANT?

Well, fuck you.