ownwolves

[ownwolves]

rich boyfriend keeps trying to give poor boyfriend money in some form or another and keeps getting refused because stubborn and pride and we are equals etc like yall never actually been poor or what

as someone whose pride would literally wither down to nothing but was and has been surrounded by actually poor people: they'd all take the money. They'd all take the gifts. I'd let them pay for my meal. I'd take the free car drive. i would however feel a very misplaced sense of guilt/gratefulness/resentment/discomfort (a mixture of all this and like. I would probably not feel like they're MY person yk. because we're so different) and this would lead to a very fucked up dynamic but believe me if someone was offering me money for free (even just seemingly) while im struggling a ton , I'd Fucking take it 😭

before anyone comes at me, this is from my personal experience and maybe yeah you'd starve before accepting help but i do seriously feel that if youve ever been very cold or very hungry or very filthy... yeah. nothing really matters at that point i guess

[ownwolves]

Tony doesn't tell the Avengers about Peter's secret identity, but Peter starts coming over constantly and chilling around the tower, helping Tony in his workshop or eating dinner with everyone.

Since Tony is weirdly secretive about who the kid is, and the fact that Spider-Man is still a small unknown (presumably adult) hero who isn't on any Avengers radars, they all collectively come to the conclusion that he's Tony's illegitimate child.

Bruce: They do have the same eyes...

Steve: This is an inappropriate conversation to have. If Tony doesn't want to tell us then we shouldn't pry

Natasha: Tony doesn't even like kids. There's no way he would tolerate one if it wasn't because of his guilt complex. I'm surprised there isn't more little Starks running around considering his previous lifestyle

Clint: *cough* drunk slut *cough*. Oh excuse my throat, I meant to say he was a drunk slut

Natasha: Steve they're the exact same. Talk too much, too fast, genius brains that go right over our heads, stubborn, like to cope with humor, same body language. They'll have the same smile lines when Peter grows into them. The only difference is that Peter was raised with manners

Steve: I'm not saying I don't agree, I'm saying it's none of our business. Anyone with basic observational skills can tell they're desperate to fill father and son roles in each others' lives, but Tony's really weird about it, so we should let him keep it private

Clint: We probably make him nervous

Bruce: Because he thinks he's a bad dad?

Natasha: I think he's kinda good at it. Which is extremely unnerving

Steve: Honestly out of all of us I had bets on Bruce having a secret wife and kids hidden somewhere. Tony stepping up to be a father was lower on my list than Nat

Natasha: You have a list?

Bruce: You think I pull?

Steve: That's irrelevant. I think it's nice that they're so close already, but we don't need to press. It might mess up a good thing

Clint: Wait can we go back to this list business. Are these like pragmatic, military leader lists, or are these for pleasure? What other kinds of lists do you have? What about which one of us is most likely to turn on you. Or what you'd turn for. Oh! What about a list of all our weak points based on accessibility and intensity, with contingency plans in case of defection or aliens or brainwashing or alien brainwashing causing defection

Steve:

Natasha:

Bruce:

Steve: This is why Tony won't share his personal life with us.

They last another week before Clint, Natasha, and Bruce team up to steal a strand of Peter's hair and test it for paternity. Steve knows something is up, and follows Clint to Bruce's lab.

Steve: What are you doing...

Natasha: Admit it, you know exactly what we're doing and you want to see the results

Steve: I... well if you already have them there's no point keeping it from me

Clint: Tony Stark is not the daddy!

Tony: Which of my exes have you been talking to?

Clint: AH oh hey Tony didn't see you there

Steve: I'm not apart of this

Tony: Is this about Peter? He told me something plucked his head when he was walking down here. Which of you murder twins was hiding in the rafters

Natasha: Y'know he's not your kid, whoever told you he was lied to you and I hope you get your child support back

Tony: My kid? He's my intern. What funky kool-aid have you all been drinking, that boy is sorting my tool drawer right now. He has slightly better dexterity than Dum-E, it's been quite helpful

Bruce: You have really poor professional boundaries if he's just an intern

Tony: Okay fine. He's actually Spider-Man. I didn't wanna tell anyone cause the Accords were still fishy, but everything should be good now. Anyways, he really wants to train with you guys so you'd have to know eventually

Clint: Who the hell is Spider-Man?

Steve: That guy in Queens who helps bring in peoples' groceries?

Tony: Well, yeah—listen, he's like 14 and he just got his powers. I'm not exactly sending him to fight armed terrorists yet. He'll grow into it, but trust me, there's potential. I'm kind of like his mentor

Steve: You really don't need to do that

Bruce: Yeah we'll all help out from now on

Natasha: Don't take too much responsibility for the boy

Clint: Oh god what have you been teaching him?

Tony: Thanks for the vote of confidence guys. Whatever, now that you all know he'll be hounding you all day for advice anyways. Good luck with that. Friday tell Pete to come down here, the Avengers are gonna train with him

Tony leaves them all, snickering to himself as loud footsteps come crashing down the hallway. If they didn't know any better they'd say several elephants were tripping down the stairs. Then, the doors burst open, Peter's mouth already running a mile-a-minute.

Peter: Really, you guys know, you guys will teach me? Can I use the shield, Ms. Romanoff can you show me how to kick, show me with Mr. Barton, or, or Mr. Rogers. I can take down someone bigger than me, I'm actually really strong. Wanna see? Why are we in Bruce's lab, is that my first lesson! Can I touch this? What are you making here, how long has this been distilling, what about my webs, have you ever seen my webs? I did them myself, but I bet we could make them even better, watch out it's really sticky—

Steve ends up with webs all over his face, several of Bruce's beakers broken from the white spray, one reacting poorly with it and exploding all over Clint and Natasha. Bruce immediately shoves them into the decontamination shower, leaving them as two drenched rats wearing skin-tight combat gear. Natasha is already fuming at the thought of trying to peel it off.

Peter: I'm really sorry, I didn't know it was on ricochet... the splitter webs were just 'cause I panicked

Steve: This is why I told you all to leave it be.

"Noted," they all say in unison.

[ownwolves]

I love the identity porn trope where a character is shit talking the person's other identity to the person. Or just in general where they like one version of the person and not the other

Deadpool: Spidey this Parker guy sure likes trashing your rep in the newspaper. Want me to trash his head in with a pipe?

Peter: Um, no Wade. He's just doing his job

Deadpool: And so am I, which is breaking the legs of those who hurt my pookie

Peter: Please don't ever go near that poor photographer.

Johnny: Can you believe this guy Webs? Cocky little nerd thinks his time is worth more than The Johnny Storm

Peter: Yeah he sounds like a real asshole

Steve: I can't stand Stark, what a money hungry, narcissistic, gallivanting, impolite bastard. I can't believe we have to work for that guy. At least he makes good armor, right Iron Man?

Tony: I whole-heartedly agree, what a complete dick

[ownwolves]

Happy Halloween from Irondad and his Spiderson! 🍬🎃🦇

[ownwolves]

Tony asking how Peter's day was as usual when he comes to the lab after school, but this time Peter says "I found five dollars on the ground!" as if he found a million dollar lottery ticket stuck to his shoe.

Peter didn't even sound this excited when he got to meet the Avengers.

Tony makes a small habit of leaving random bills stuck to a rock on Peter's route, in the halls of SI, or "wind blown" to the brick outside the building when Peter is swinging over after patrol. He knows Peter would feel weird just taking the money from his hand, and that part of the excitement is due to the unexpected and lucky nature of the find. He doesn't do it too often, to curb suspicion, but Peter gets just as excited every time.

[ownwolves]

i know i hurt you, tony

marvel text posts 11/?

featuring real messages from theunsentproject.com

[ownwolves]

is theres posts on this site

[ownwolves]

unfortunately i need to be put down immediately

[ownwolves]

just heard the most beautiful sentence at work

[ownwolves]

They should make a "are you mad at me" that is taken neutrally and informationally every time and doesn't make everything worse when you ask it

[ownwolves]

#neverforget the time that Bella wore a full length khaki skirt to meet Edward’s family and he basically lost it because he thought she looked so sexy

[ownwolves]

i love the term “affair”…. not only are you cheating on your partner but its like A Whole Thing

[ownwolves]

source: That's Ms. Bulldyke to You, Charlie! by Jane Caminos

[ownwolves]

and never read such syllables aloud

fandom: mcu

main pairing: clint/natasha

tags: alternate first meetings, very very vague sexual content, groping grinding feeling each other up etc

"Every man she sleeps with ends up dead," Clint gasps out. Natalia nods, and for a second, her face is just the wrong side of somber. She raises herself on her knees, and slides her underwear down — Clint stares, helplessly.

"Yeah," she says. Then: "So, you've got about five seconds to figure out if it's worth the risk."

It takes Clint a moment to catch up.

read on ao3

[ownwolves]

and never read such syllables aloud

fandom: mcu

main pairing: clint/natasha

tags: alternate first meetings, very very vague sexual content, groping grinding feeling each other up etc

"Every man she sleeps with ends up dead," Clint gasps out. Natalia nods, and for a second, her face is just the wrong side of somber. She raises herself on her knees, and slides her underwear down — Clint stares, helplessly.

"Yeah," she says. Then: "So, you've got about five seconds to figure out if it's worth the risk."

It takes Clint a moment to catch up.

read on ao3

[ownwolves]

and never read such syllables aloud

fandom: mcu

main pairing: clint/natasha

tags: alternate first meetings, very very vague sexual content, groping grinding feeling each other up etc

"Every man she sleeps with ends up dead," Clint gasps out. Natalia nods, and for a second, her face is just the wrong side of somber. She raises herself on her knees, and slides her underwear down — Clint stares, helplessly.

"Yeah," she says. Then: "So, you've got about five seconds to figure out if it's worth the risk."

It takes Clint a moment to catch up.

read on ao3

[ownwolves]

Favorite MCU characters + First lines.