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consider:

papyrus has never seen the moon

papyrus may legitimately think the moon has a scent

he assumes it is a good scent 

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*exits stage right*

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Hey blue, have you ever seen a boob up close

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hmmm

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Iridescent clouds, looking like a rainbow in the clouds.

A diffraction phenomenon caused by small water droplets or small ice crystals individually scattering light. Larger ice crystals do not produce iridescence, but can cause halos, a different phenomenon.

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Do you ever get a little scared the day before your birthday?

I’m not sure if this is standard procedure. I used to hate my birthday for like a decade. Like the first while to be edgy and then because of s-word ideation but like... i’m excited this time.. or I want to be??

Maybe it’s because I really want to celebrate it with someone. I’m of course gonna tell my co-workers but... idk. We’ll see.

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Me, in my infinite wisdom, turned on the burner instead of the oven. I come back 5 minutes later to notice this my biscuits cooking on the burner.

“Aww. I left it on. Oh, I’ll just grab the metal tray with my BARE HAND.”

Nothing went wrong.

I’m physically invulnerable to extreme heat because of sheer force of will.

“The heat never bothered me anyway~” I say while one finger is under the foset while the other scrolls through tumblr so anxious ass stays still.

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I’ve found a new hobby!

I go into the comments section of ambient sound videos like one where someone “drives you home” or a crackling fire place with a thunderstorm outside. Like, so many people have these cutsy wholesome conversations or RP random stuff. Like.. i don’t expect that out youtube but damn, it’s just the best.

People are just so adorable.

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*me after trying to be healthy by drinking a liter of water in under a minute*

I’m feeling like shit.

Time to read erotic!

PEACE the fuck out to OBLIVION.

Follow your dreams,

And never look back!

Bye!

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*when dating power is maxed out and my skill tree is fucking perfect*

Me: show me some bone ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

My human partner: uh...

Me: shit, wrong species. If only there was a skeleton in my closet that I could woo!

*checks closet to find no horny skeletons*

Me: ah well, murder it is.

My human partner: wut???

Me: If there are no magical skeletons to be found, *cracks knuckles* then store bought ones will suffice.

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Me: I finally found the secret formula for the cutest Killer Sans platonic ship ever. It makes me cry at night knowing how amazing I am.

Me, showing my incomprehensible chicken scratches to Flopsy: LOOK AT MY MASTERPIECE!!!! It has hand holding! There’s even a cute life lesson and everything!

Flopsy looks at it for a solid 5 seconds, then looks away.

Me: SHE HAS APPROVED!! The sage says it must he done. Let the cuteness... begin.

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Before garden work party: social hermit mode ACTIVATE

After: PLEASE, pretty PLEASSSSSE, can we go back? With a cherry on top?

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Me whenever writing a new ship and notice the lack of chemistry:

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Flopsy: *tries to get my attention*

Me: IGNORED! Phone here. Phone everything. Phone is... my precious

Flopsy: *jumps on said phone*

Me: NOOOOOOOO! Not the drugs!

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Me dealing with the fact that my story’s more episodic than I’d prefer:

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Oooh! This brings back a fun memory. When I was a kid, my grandpa used to make our family nutcracker sing to the tune of Happy and You Know “put your finger in my mouth, I won’t bite! Nom nom!” Obviously, I put my finger in that damn nutcracker’s mouth every time. Rip fingers. Gramps was lying.

Now, I’m just imagining that but

“put me in your mouth, I won’t stealyoursoul!

Put me in your mouth, I won’t stealyoursoul!

Just put me in your mouth, I swear I’m not lying.

Now put me in your mouth, I won’t stealyoursoul!”

i’m 1000% sure this meme is dead and someone already did this but this has been on my mind for weeks