quantumelepant

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december mood

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I'M BACK HELLOOO guess who posted a new chapter after SIX months? That's right, not me, because it's been four months so it could have definitely been worse.

In this one you'll get people fighting, people crying, a dash of a long awaited backstory, funny interactions, a promise, and a fleabag reference too

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This blog is my adult version of cutting pictures out of magazines and glueing them on to paper

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Just wait untill my 6 tumblr mutuals hear about this

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"But that ship is toxic and problematic" okay ❤️ yay ❤️

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this wouldn't be happening if i had a mentor that was deeply interested in me and my life and guided me with a firm hand even when i was overwhelmed. whatever.

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Remus: Are you seeing someone?

James: Yeah.

Remus: Is it serious?

James: No, it’s his brother.

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✟ Sin for me, baby ✟

underpinkskys ⭑ ☾⭑

Hello! This is my entry for the @hpfemininomenonfest you can read it here.

✟ Blasphemy

✟ Religious Guilt

✟ Romance

✟ Dark theme

✟ More humour than one might expect

✟ Finding love in unlikely places

Please go check out all the other amazing works in the collection <3

Thank you to all the lovely mods for organising 🤍

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I'm back with a new chapter,

In this one we have wolfstar hitting the aquarium, which is typical gay shit, cause we love clichés in the clerb, thank you very much. It's sprinkled with trauma, which is also typical gay shit so nothing too crazy.

I really do need to tone down the unhinged posts about this fic.

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no way ppl are using ai to write ao3. what happened to being a tortured writer. what happened to blood on the page. what happened to the ao3 curse. people used to get run over, have their houses burned down, break their entire spines and they still put in the work to finish a chapter. fuck you, using ai. y’all are weak

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I was reading through my drafts and it looks like they are the most unhinged concoction of sleep-deprived brain mush I've ever laid eyes on.

What a ride.

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Yooo I'm back at it, this chapter is what the-people have been waiting for (I guess, I think, I ASSUME), so there you go, jegulus soup for you!

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I'm starting a collection

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In the subway rn waiting for the train, the girl beside me tried to hide her phone but GIRLLLL I know what you are, I would recognize the ao3 font from Saturn

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Chapter 12 of The irrational urge to jump is out, but this one's special because I can finally reveal the tracklist of the first album of the band (also, you get Dorlene, Rosekiller and Wolfstar all in one go).

Click 'more' to read what each song is about. Is it crazy work? Yes, yes it is, but I swear I have a good reason. Maybe an okay reason. I HAVE A REASON.

THIS comes directly from the terribly-written documents in which I annotate everything about a fic so it is, in fact, barely readable. Since the album is about a chaotic descent to hell, here's where each song is "placed".

Legend:

Paradise - Purgatory - Hell

the gloomy wood: (quoting the gloomy wood at the start of Dante's journey). It’s about change and running away, about how much you leave behind, and the weight you still carry around. Eventually it will lead you back to the original cause - lyrically there are multiple references to the original sin. This is the song in which Sirius and James stop singing/playing and there’s that upside-down moment, then Sirius sings: “I will die in the claws that I grew up in".

Wait for a…: this is added at last as the second track. It's only music. No one really gets it, but Regulus insists. He's connecting it to crystal boy ("wait for a crystal boy"). It being only music underlines how Regulus has been left alone to wait for his brother’s voice to come back to him in a 'Waiting for Godot' kind of way.

Crystal boy (Drawer): It's about Sirius. It's called Crystal boy because Regulus 'breaks' this song into different lines he scatters in this album and the following one.

The uneventful life of David X.: storytelling-style. It’s about this David X. man who leads an uneventful life, then one day he disappears in the woods and never comes back. As he does so, he lives all sorts of fantastical and psychedelic adventures. This is about drugs as an escapism but it's not explicitly stated. Upbeat and calm in tempo, when we get to the adventures (chorus) it gets crazy sound effects and strong belting.

Seen: it’s a song about sin, subtle references to religion and sex, but poetic. The basic idea is that although fully aware of the gravity of the sin, one keeps on doing it because it feels too good.

Parasight: About falling in love with the last person you should fall for. It's very slow and romantic at first, then it’s full pandemonium, after that it’s slowed down again in a robot dying kind of way. The title is a play of words, it means love is a parasite, nothing pleasant, it eats you from the inside. But Para-sight means paranormal sighting and it’s the whole sci-fi thing it has going on.

Sorry for the inscription: A song about wrath (the sin). It’s a series of nasty things they would write on the tombstone of someone they hate.

Pearly gates: It's a series of good things they did in life. It uses the devices of a heteronormative relationship to convey the message. Social critique. This song and sorry for the inscription are meant to be listened one after the other.

If murder was an option: More hardcore. This song is surprisingly about sex and lust, though.

Where did it all go wrong?: Sirius wrote this one. It’s about running away. Another hardcore punk in genre. The title is a title of an Oasis song.

Proper ways to fall: title of the album, it’s very blissful-ukulele sound wise. It’s one of the worst, most sacrilegious songs on the album lyrics wise though.

Wonderful: Reference to a famous Italian song (which I guess doesn't exist in this world): Meraviglioso. It's about a suicidal man and an angel coming down to tell him about the good of the world.

Crayon nightmares: about finding yourself in the very pit of hell, but it's much more different than the horrors people expect it to be. Turns out, hell is a crayon drawing, two-dimensional. It follows psychedelic dives into this madness with a flickering candlelight as the only guide for the protagonist, it has multiple references to childhood. Overall it's pervaded by a slight sense of anguish. Peter wrote this in one night with James when they were super high. Actually Peter did everything, James only had the candlelight idea, which will then become a secret hint Regulus will use in future songs.

STUCK!: It's about a climb and the continuous slippery quality of a phantom hill. It's a metaphor about not being able to escape a situation that cages you (home, for the brothers). The song ends and then there's one last verse completely unexpected where the song changes meaning and it's about the inevitability of a feeling you don't want to face, so it gains a new meaning: I'm stuck with you. It's the last track in the album and Regulus DOES write it about James. It's the very first instance where he does. A line in this song is: “This is how I learned I won't sleep no more” (it's the first reference regulus makes about his insomnia as well).

Sun can only cut so deep (Drawer): it's a full WAR of a song, all screamed/sobbed about not being allowed love and being totally fine with it until you realise all this time it was the only thing you've ever craved. It's super tender and it's the first reference to the sun/James Regulus makes. It starts off generic and ends up being totally about James. At one point he says something along the lines of being about to die, blood dripping, beeps intensifying in one long and dreadful line (heart monitor) and having rhythm being reinstalled in him (with a direct reference to the drums). This will end up being the only fully recorded song in the drawer because he records it at dawn on a cd as a demo to give his band and then as the morning progresses he thinks it's too explicit so he puts in the drawer for good instead. (Hell in Paradise).

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Holiday Wolfstar they have my heart