ragdollhumpty

[ragdollhumpty]

[ragdollhumpty]

Do we think this is a fictive thing? Or...

[ragdollhumpty]

So what brings you to this circus? 🎪

[ragdollhumpty]

I'm wearing my sunday best to attend my Gnostic Reform Mormon sacrament meeting.

Not everyone there is a clown but they know I'm more dedicated to Mother Goose than the demiurge or heavenly mother Sophia.

But it nice to learn how other people shuffle this same deck. It's nice to be in community.

[ragdollhumpty]

thinkin bout her…

[ragdollhumpty]

DEATH OF THE CIRCUS

[ragdollhumpty]

Any other acid-fried sceneDoll clowns 🪿 on this app? I need blogs to follow 🤡🤟🥳

[ragdollhumpty]

Overly moralizing vegan retelling of Jack & the Beanstalk where selling the cow for beans is them going vegan.

And all the gold from the Beanstalk is just a metaphor for how much money they save only eating beans.

[ragdollhumpty]

That's literally not an apology though. That's an identity split amnesia. The fact gangle smiles like that is enough is horrifying. Ragatha literally is the part that holds the emotional abuse memories as explicitly stated in this scene. God are we both sides of this interaction, and if you relate to either or both it's important to know "I would never do that" when they did and can't remember isn't an apology.

bro gangle's tiny smile when ragatha apologizes for what she said to her last episode 😭

[ragdollhumpty]

That. That's baby eyes that's when someone says something and turns you into a baby that can't talk and remembers different things and is less jaded.

I don’t know if this expression is quiet rage or shock at the fact Ragatha apologised to him

[ragdollhumpty]

This was the first clown I drew, I named her molly.

[ragdollhumpty]

Everytime The Amazing Digital Circus references Raggedy Anne & Andy: A Musical Adventure (1977) my ragdoll heart sings 🥰🥰🥰

I love this "candy hearts and paper flowers" ass system. We feel so seen by them. My ragdoll alter is eerily close to Ragatha. And seeing Caine's bullshit have inspired my alters to question our hOSt and tell it she's hurting us for the first time ever.

And and and in this episode 5 seeing Jax get gender dysphoria because the rest of the system wants to wear a dress but now he's fronting and stuck with it. Wonderful. Our body has detransitioned because of a similar vote and Brick felt so validated. He's not really here but he could be in the moment while watching and that was refreshing.

I feel so lucky to see and understand myself better through this story. And the fact me and the animator are both influenced by the same child horror animated masterpiece that is Raggedy Anne & Andy: a Musical Adventure (1977) makes me feel genuinely less alone somehow. I wonder if gooseworx watches that movie the same way I do kinning every character and switching to play all the parts because your alters are perfect fits.

Idk maybe this is all just head cannon and projection and no one else interprets the digital circus as a system story, and maybe its unintentional and I'm just crazy. But I personally value things that make crazy people feel less alone. I value this story.

[ragdollhumpty]

Looking for goobers to be moots with 🤡

We're Humpty a 27 yo disabled system. We love clowns, folk lore, murder musicals, crafting and much more! (but those are the alters that tend to post)

I've been in the queer Facebook world for years but the algorithm has gotten extra hostile to crazy posting and clowns.

But the good news is that means I have content from years of posting there that no one here has seen and maybe showing my old art will help me feel better about not currently being able to make art.

I have so many clown looks I'm excited to share with clownblr!! 🥳🤡🎩🤟

[ragdollhumpty]

Can I die from failure to thrive at 27 lmao

.

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Also speaking of did y'all hear that SIDS like most of the time is the cops and coroner knowing the death was the parents fault but presuming it was genuinenly an accident but they spare their feelings through the entire fake medical category of sids.

And as a system who is baby r@ped / birth defect disabled I can't help but fear actual murd3rs are being let off this way. I relate a lot with these babies, the failure to thrive never made it, stupid parent's fault deaths. I feel like I'm experiencing the same thing but where they lived one day that happened to be the shortest day of the year and I'm living the one day that happens to be the longest but we're both dying for the sins of our fathers and mothers. And we never cracked the shell.

But who knows my shell is cracking maybe this goose will be strong enough to make it but that's why I feel I must call it what it is. I've seen too many elongated deaths from child abuse to subside the rage any longer.

I'm trying my broken best to love mine and others crazies while I can and maybe between us we'll find enough working parts to help some of our dying children in all their different incarnations.

[ragdollhumpty]

[ragdollhumpty]

I have a friend who's family worked with circus elephants for many generations and who grew up around them and they vehemently defend the loving dynamic between the elephants and their handlers.

And they were closer to the reality than anyone who I've ever met whose called it animal abuse.

I’m working on a post related to animal training right now, and my research path has filled in so much of my understanding of the relationship people have with animals and nature and even colonialism.

It’s been so crazy to me how ubiquitous the association between circus and animal abuse is, and it points to the broader misunderstanding of the circus following its decline in the early 20th century.

Don’t get me wrong— in its time, there was no shortage of circus owners willing to do anything to put an elephant or leopard in their ring. But, most people don’t know that the circus as an art form had been developing for nearly a century before anything more exotic than a canary was trained for performance.

Obviously, climate sensitivity and species’ population decline is a major contributor to many exotic animals being phased out of circus performances. But given the resources needed to properly care for animals like this, most modern circuses forgo animals for financial reasons long before ethical concerns began.

So, I think the clearest reason for this shunning of the circus is the very same reason for its popularity in the U.S.— unabated capitalism. If there was genuine cultural interest in circus as an art form, I don’t think the average American would consider Barnum & Bailey and Ringling Bros. As the be-all-end-all of what circus is.

[ragdollhumpty]

I've missed just being an absolute basket case online. I've been on queer Facebook for years which was really nice in its hey day but God does it feel good to unzip my skin and let the shit ooze out cuz who cares about another psycho bitch on the Internet kinda spirals. Facebook hasn't let me do that in years. You literally get wellness check notifications over there. No thank you.

I really gotta stop for the sake of the body now.

Hell is real its the world capitalists create in justifying heaven

The more we remember the less we think we mostly experience co consciousness full childhood amnesias are coming back in their true felt abstraction a million threads of sin.

My hyper verbal echolalia alters are having a rough go rn with muteness. I think that's how I know there's a real medical something besides ya know the vocal scope I already got like the fact the really verbal ones want to and sometimes try a whisperer sentence here and there and then we're coughing and repositioning again like that's not normal this probably isn't some stranger multi alter conspiracy something is happening to me

Hi that was just one of the strangers you encountered walking the plains of spirit prison. Too disabled to be an irl schizo so enjoy the relatability through your evil orb. Progress 🤖🤟🎩

These are just the edible sleepy ramblings of a rotting haunted doll plz disregard or adopt.