rwkigano-blog

[rwkigano-blog]

“A bitch can write!”

That’s what I said to my ex lover when I bragged about you.

“she writes linnneesss on lines on lines. I swear she creepin’ into my blood veins with that music.” 

-I’m looking for that green sweet sap. that jealousy that’s plagued me all year.

-rwkigano 

[rwkigano-blog]

When you meet someone new.

And the only thing they can offer you

is a chance to forget someone old.

I like that

When you can forget together

And lick wounds.

And pour coconut oil on scars.

Warm chamomile for swollen eyes.

That’s why my bed is never empty on Friday night.

My lips ache to recite these lines.

She rolls her eyes.

“Girl, you are always bringing home these losers.”

I light my Newport. Inhale.

“Let’s go grab a drink!” -I say 

My gut swallows the truth. Heavy with wine and cheap cigarettes. 

-rwkigano 

[rwkigano-blog]

Sometimes.

Writing poetry is like

making a list

of all the mother fuckers

who did me dirty.

And then turning them into

Music.

On pedestals

long fallen.

Stages

eternally empty. 

Playing only the notes

I write. I approve.

-control

-rwkigano

[rwkigano-blog]

I just gravitate towards you. 

Like.

It’s not even me.

It’s not my fault.

And I can’t do nothin about it.

We collide. 

And trying to separate 

would just rip us raw.

I feel like we should invest

in one of those surgeons 

who specialize in conjoined twins.

Maybe then we can at least prepare

for who isn’t going to 

survive the split.

-rwkigano 

[rwkigano-blog]

I slip you on.

you never

fit

right.

But my

bare skin

cracks

when your

silk

is absent.

-longing

-rwkigano 

[rwkigano-blog]

My anxiety 

lives

right underneath

my skin.

So close to the surface

I watch it seep

from my pores.

These lines.

On my hips.

These are My Anxiety.

Gnawing at my bones.

Preparing to escape

at the seams.

My anxiety 

sleeps

in the deep centers

of my iris.

Biting.Scratching.Screaming.

Begging to be seen.

Waiting.

But Today.

I slip on my gold sunglasses

Lean in. Smile. Blush.

I fall into your lap.

All you will remember

is my 

blue lipstick.

-rwkigano 

[rwkigano-blog]

Love Letter

to my next lover.

Don’t try me.

My silver hair.

And sharp tongue.

The way I cut.

-I had to show him who Babe Ruth is real quick | Nigga I always hit it out the park

-rwkigano

[rwkigano-blog]

stranger

I wonder if you

still love me.

Or if i have morphed

into the strange

foreign enemy

that you resent

because you will

never understand

the pieces that now

bring me together

Because that is who

you are to me.

Now.

And i still love you.

Stranger.

-rwkigano

[rwkigano-blog]

And just like that.

Smoking a cigarette.

Pulling at the gray hair

dyed from last years 

heartache.

I am numb. And empty.

I forget. Everything.

I panic. 

I grieve for my

forgotten lovers.

I grieve over

soft moments. Lost.

And i feel guilty. 

And i feel detached.

And I feel empty.

And.

I smile at the peace

found in disregard

This is The Forgetting.

-rwkigano 

[rwkigano-blog]

Jua

Today the sun is collecting

in the back of my throat.

Dancing Bantu.

Making home within

the spaces once barren.

Jua.

Come to me.

Let me swallow you.

And become you.

-rwkigano 

[rwkigano-blog]

How to talk to a lover turned stranger?

Dont.

New lovers are searching for you.

Foreign eyes cannot find you

if you are surrounded by Old.

Open yourself.

Make love to fresh waters.

Wrap your thighs around new gardens.

-new

-rwkigano

[rwkigano-blog]

My knees are raw/my body is heavy/I collapse at the ocean/the salt burns/and/leaves me pink/I purge/and release/and grow/from the seeds/the ancestors/bore within me

this one is you.

you reincarnate.

in me.

Mother.

-birth

-rwkigano 

[rwkigano-blog]

the curve in my hip/when you dip just the tip/my legs wide open/gardens/and flowers/and waterfalls/and rivers/you will never taste again

are you parched?/are you starved?/do you remember it yet?

my breasts that you cupped/that you drank/and you spanked/my ass that you fucked/now raw/bleeding/my hair that you snatched/shoved into the pillow/and rammed/and slammed/lay to rest in my pillow

my soft black neck that you choked/watched me gasp/in pleasure/while you choked

my peppa grain naps/my purple/”not the pink”/my black/and my brown/and my 50,000 shades of goddess

remember it all/write it down/take a picture

-one night stand

-rwkigano 

[rwkigano-blog]

“My sandals slap against/hot black concrete/Thick thighs are browning/My ass peaks out from/underneath pink shorts/Sweat slides down my spine/from the back of my head/My hair is wild/Brown fat curls fall/against gold sunglasses/My pineapple mango mojito/keeps spilling against my breast/I lick it off”

-miami

-rwkigano 

[rwkigano-blog]

“I have become so terrified of relationships and commitment and any sort of companionship lasting more than a few sleepovers and a happy hour. It has become this pathological fear around the entire concept of giving myself to another and allowing them to introduce pieces of themselves into me. It is the fear of becoming, or believing that I have become, more whole with them than I would be without them. I would rather feel broken, alone, than whole and not own the rights to all of my pieces.” -rwkigano 

[rwkigano-blog]

“I’m wet/drowning/you spill all over my lips/thick wet black ink/i stretch my tongue out/searching for more/you leak all over my face/stain/you taste like ice/and lemon/and my favorite cucumber cocktail/but i keep rubbing/and my tongue is raw now/and i can’t get you out of my mouth/and i can’t get your cold black tired heart/out of my pink mouth”

-rwkigano 

[rwkigano-blog]

“when it rains/I pretend we are oceans/rising and falling with the moon/we drown in each other.

-tides 

-rwkigano