sassyshoulderangel319

[sassyshoulderangel319]

Jason being immortal but it’s kinda like Klaus from the umbrella academy in the sense that he doesn’t fucking realise that he’s immortal. Damian is the only one who knows and it’s been pissing him off for YEARS that Jason won’t get with the fucking program.

the thing is, Jason never questioned what exactly woke him up back in that coffin. he was slightly distracted by dealing with the wood and dirt attempting to suffocate him back beyond the grave, and once he’d gotten free and was wandering around Gotham, he didn’t have the presence of mind to do much but zombie-walk around until the league found him. after that? well he was too busy with training, annoying Ra’s, helping raise Damian, and just overall getting used to life without being Robin to think about the fact that he’d come back to life at one point.

Damian, on the other hand, clocked that Jason was immortal as a toddler when he watched his new older brother accidentally fall off a cliff during a ‘nature hike’ that was actually endurance training that Damian had been allowed to attend from a chest harness that, luckily, he hadn’t been inside of during the fall. he peered off the edge of the stomach clenching drop, sharp spikes littering the bottom, to see Jason un-skewer his shoulder from a rock and stand up to crack his neck, before casually calling up that he was fine and it was ‘just a little fall’. little Damian called bullshit.

things continued like that the entire time Jason spent at the league, and it pissed Damian off to no end that Jason kept just walking off fatal injuries and absolutely REFUSE to believe that they were fatal. ‘i just have a high pain tolerance.’ ‘you got shot in the neck, ahki.’ ‘it skimmed me.’ ‘YOU DIED.’ ‘stop making up stories, demon brat.’ it’s driving the kid insane. the worst thing is he can’t even tell anyone else for fear that Ra’s gets a hold of the realisation and decides to use Jason in his research for finding better ways to prolong his lifespan.

Jason, bursting into Damian’s room in the early morning, spurting blood from an arrow wound to the chest: Dami- Dami- u- argk-

Damian, half asleep, watching blankly from bed as his brother bleeds out on his floor:

Damian:

Damian: *deep sigh*

-twenty minutes later, Jason wakes up on Damian’s floor completely healed-

Jason: …

Damian:

Jason: wow, sorry Dames, guess i drank too much last night and blacked out. didn’t mean to crash here.

Damian, unimpressed and holding a bloody arrow: grandfather says you stopped an assasination attempt on my mother.

Jason: haha yeah, craaaazy night

Damian: get out.

Jason: -getting out.

eventually Damian heads to Gotham and, of course, his overprotective immortal brother follows soon after with the mission of building a crime empire, killing a clown, pissing of the fourth Robin at any opportunity, and infuriating the fuck out of Bruce Wayne. after a while the Red Hood gets his identity reveal, and gradual tentative truce, and Damian gets both of his families to be more or less on ok terms for once.

the issue is Jason is still really bad at staying alive. and the rest of the family is kind of sensitive to that specific thing. and Damian’s apathy is not appreciated. it takes them a while to figure everything out.

~

*all four batboys are captured by a rogue, Bruce on his way but they need to stall*

Rogue: and now, you will have to pick amongst yourselves who will DIE!

Jason and Dick, instantly: ME!

Damian, dryly: Red Hood.

Dick: ITS GOTTA BE M- Robin what the fuck

Damian: *shrugs*

Jason, so used to Damian being weirdly ok with his more dangerous activities he’s not even offended: YEAH SHOOT ME. I CAN TAKE IT!

Tim: no he can’t, don’t shoot him!

Damian: no, shoot him.

Tim and Dick: ROBIN!

Jason: bite me non-believers, i’m getting shot today-!

Damian: please do it quickly so he shuts up.

Rogue:

Rogue:

Rogue: the others told me the new Robin was fucked up but like i didn’t realise exactly how much-

~

Tim: me and Damian didn’t really get off on the right foot, on account of he kept trying to kill me.

Jason: ? so? that’s just what he does when you piss him off. he tries to kill me all the time.

Tim: ?

Jason: i called him a wanker last week so he shoved me off a building with no grapple. luckily the garbage can broke my fall and saved me haha!

Tim: ???

Damian, fully never wanted Tim dead and was instead so used to never having to worry about hurting Jason that he forgot that murder was actually fatal to his other brothers: yeah that’s my bad, Drake. it was instinct.

~

*Bruce walks into the batcave to see Jason, gunshot in his forehead, laying obviously deceased on the ground with Damian stood over him, nudging him with his foot and holding a gun.*

Bruce: oh my- oh my god, Jaylad no please-!

Damian: in my defence he told me the safety was on.

Bruce, crying: JASON PLEASE NOT AGAIN-

Damian: just give him like ten minutes

Bruce: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT- OH MY GOD HIS BRAIN’S ON THE BATCOMPUTER

Damian: again, not my fault.

Dick walking in: hey whats all the noi- LITTLEWING?!?!!

-

*ten minutes later, the family is sobbing and Damian is tapping his foot impatiently*

Jason: wooaaaaah, headache. …is everything ok?

Everyone else, devastatingly shocked:

Damian: i shot you in the head and you died again. they panicked.

Jason: ha-ha, funny as always brat. what’d you do, hit me with the butt of the gun or something?

Damian, turning to the others: it is a miracle he ever managed to get his GED.

[sassyshoulderangel319]

I'm rewatching BBC Merlin for the hundredth time and just need to talk about The Witchfinder episode from season 2 and how this impacted Merlin's decision to keep his magic a secret.

By now, Merlin has been in Camelot long enough to see how Gaius is a trusted advisor to Uther. They've been friends for decades. Uther trusts Gaius as much as he is capable of trusting anyone.

And yet. And yet Uther STILL orders the execution of his most trusted advisor on the word of the Witchfinder.

To Uther, the years of service and trust mean nothing in the face of sorcery. Uther tried to apologize (ish) later, and rightfully so, Gaius refused to just brush the near execution aside.

Now think about Merlin. He has come to care about Arthur as a person at this point, not just part of his destiny, but they aren't as close as we know they will be later.

Merlin has been traumatized by seeing his father figure almost die because the king was blinded by his hatred of sorcery. Merlin knows it was almost his own execution here.

It's no wonder he didn't want to tell Arthur at this point. If Uther was ready to kill Gaius, we know canonically he was fine with Merlin dying.

Once Arthur became king, I believe Merlin still remembered this. We know what Merlin said: he didn't want to put Arthur in this position, to have to make the choice of life or death. But I believe there was still this deep seated fear that his years of service and council would never be enough to out weigh the death sentence of being a sorcerer in Camelot.

[sassyshoulderangel319]

Thinking about how wild it is that enshittification starts as a way for the rich to squeeze the populace for more money but ends up infecting everything so even luxury products decline in quality. They’ve got more money than fucking God now and for what? Literally they can’t even buy fun nice stuff for themselves because they killed craft.

Anyway this post is about Dhaka muslin but it’s also about everything.

[sassyshoulderangel319]

[sassyshoulderangel319]

Me and you

[sassyshoulderangel319]

[sassyshoulderangel319]

[sassyshoulderangel319]

literally half the reason i tag stuff on here is so i can go back and browse my own blog. i am my blog’s #1 fan

[sassyshoulderangel319]

I just accidentally made un-tea?????

I made green tea, but I forgot there was an old bag of chai in the kettle, so I mixed chai water with decaf green tea, then I mixed in like a half table spoon or something of that honey from the dollar store that they aren't legally allowed to call honey because there's too much corn syrup in it and some almond milk and a single drop of coffee creamer because we ran out and???? It tastes like??? Nothing????

It has LESS flavor than my tap water! HOW do you EVEN-

I think I made a flavor that's only perceptible to shrimp, that's the only explanation

[sassyshoulderangel319]

they dont tell you this but like half of adulthood is just washing the same FUCKING pan

[sassyshoulderangel319]

i like tagging posts with my ocs and then never actually posting about them. i wonder what my followers think their deals are

[sassyshoulderangel319]

Reblog to give prev the power to write their fanfiction

[sassyshoulderangel319]

Going to a city you know a mutual lives in like hello general area my friend is in. You’re somewhere

[sassyshoulderangel319]

[sassyshoulderangel319]

saw this cute post and now I'm not going on reddit for the rest of the day. quit while you're ahead

[sassyshoulderangel319]

A good rule of thumb for AI is "would you trust a trained pigeon to do this?"

"We trained a pigeon to recognise cancerous cell clusters and somehow they're really good at it" okay great, that's something that could plausibly be a thing.

"We trained a pigeon to recognise good CV:s and left it in charge of sorting through all our job applications" uh perhaps consider not doing that.

[sassyshoulderangel319]

doing anything with technology these days is an unending cycle of going no i do not want to use AI. im not interested in setting up copilot. I do not want help building my site. I would like my autocorrect to make sense again. I do not want AI generated search suggestions. no. nope. still not. die