sauronnaise

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“I'm the main character! I can't die yet!" *dies on the spot*

—Fëanor

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Finrod with a tramp stamp.

Is the thought of the day.

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Manwë: I don't understand Melkor.

Manwë: All that evil... is beyond me.

Varda: Buddy, you're just in denial.

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Elrohir: Dad! Dad! Elladan's mean!

Elrond: What did he do?

Elrohir: He called me 'ugly'!

Elrond:

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My lack of reading skills strikes again: I read Macron instead of Mairon. I was confused because what the heck would the French president be doing with Melkor.

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Who's the most stable couple of the Legendarium?

I'm considering Sam and Rosie, Tom Bombadil and Goldberry, but certainly not Fëanor and Nerdanel.

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Sauron: 👁👄👁

Melkor: *exists*

Sauron: 👁🫦👁

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Sometimes, I just imagine Ossë, after Maglor cast the silmaril in the sea, throwing it back and shouting, "Take up your shit, I don't want it!"

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Gandalf: It hurts to think.

Galadriel: To think what?

Gandalf: No. Just to think. Thinking hurts.

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URGENT: Teleporno

Nerds, I need you.

What in Arda Marred would Celeborn's Quenya name be? Tyelperno? Tyelporno? Tyelporn?

That's it. That's the emergency.

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Happy Easter Everybody!!!

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Pippin: *accidentally drops something*

Balrog: *wakes up from a nap* Bonjour

The more I think about it, the funnier the scene gets. The Balrog could have rolled back to sleep, but no, homie was so offended to be woken up that he decided to stir trouble and make everyone's life miserable.

You know what, that Balrog is very relatable.

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Frodo: Why don't you come drink tea with me at Bilbo's?

Merry: I can't.

Frodo: Why not?

Merry: He has this tall mop in front of his house. It really scares me.

Bilbo: It's not a mop, it's Gandalf.

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I dreamt that Fëanor and Fingolfin were arguing. Fëanor said something along the lines of, 'Veni vedi vici buene tiende bon bon bon'. Fingolfin threatened to drop his cellphone in the toilet.

Fëanor, very offended, shouted, 'Mi mi mi mi mi!!!'

He was so loud that it woke me up.

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I forgot Finarfin's Sindarin name for a moment. I thought he was Arafinwë, and only Arafinwë. Since I couldn't remember 'Finarfin', my logic went as follows:

"He never left Aman. Why would he have a Sindarin name if he's never met a Sinda to rename him?"

I would like to think I had some revelation, but no. Google proved me wrong.

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“I yap, therefore I rizz.”

—Fëanor, linguist extraordinaire.

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Pippin: I licked a salt lamp, once.

Merry: And?

Pippin: It was salty.