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A GOOD LEADER:

Inspires and motivates others

Displays high integrity and honesty

Solves problems and analyzes issues

Drives for results

Communicates powerfully and prolifically

Builds relationships

Displays technical or professional expertise

Displays a strategic perspective

Develops others

Innovates

A GOOD FOLLOWER:

Think for themselves

 Carry out assignments with energy and assertiveness

Are self-motivated, self-starters

Take calculated risks

Receive high ratings from both superiors and peers

Taking initiative and not waiting to be told what to do

Having a broad view of what your job entails. A good follower never says, “that’s not my job,” but pitches in and helps out where needed.

Mentoring, teaching, and helping co-workers

Having strong support for the mission of the organization or group

Encouraging a sense of fairness in the group and organization

COLLABORATION WITH: Mera Limpao II

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HOW TO CONTROL YOUR EMOTIONS

1. Learn to respond instead of react - Take a moment to pause and consider what just happened instead of just instantly reacting to new information or a new situation. By taking a few seconds to pause and consider, you can calm yourself briefly and you will be likely to produce a better response.

2. Focus on what you can control - Once you have been presented with a stressful or emotional situation, try to identify what you can and can’t control. If something is done, you can’t change it. You can only determine what to do now.

You can control your response, and to a certain degree, you can likely control what happens next. By focusing on what you can control, you are empowering yourself. By dwelling on things you can’t control, you disempower yourself and make yourself more frustrated and more stressed.

3. Figure out what’s important NOW - When you are presented with a challenging situation in life, it’s important to prioritize what things you have to act on now.

So many people freak out about little urgent matters and lose sight of what’s really important for them to focus on first. Again, by taking a few moments to pause and consider, you can refocus your mind on what’s most important right now and prioritize your plan of action.

4. Know that you can handle anything - It’s been said that if people made a circle, put their problems in the middle, and had to pick a problem to take back out, most people would pick their own problem to retrieve. Whatever challenges you are facing that may cause stress or negative emotions, you can handle them.

We suggest you ask yourselves this question at times of stress:

Am I going to die right now?

If the answer is “no,” then realize that you CAN handle the situation. Sure, some situations are extremely difficult to deal with, but step by step, we can find solutions and move forward.

5. Change the meaning you give to “negative” events. - The more you practice the points above (especially pausing to respond and realizing that you can handle any challenge), the more you will start to view challenging events as more neutral than negative. You’ll even start finding the good in difficult situations in terms of what lessons you can learn, skills you can develop, and new motivation you can gain.

This skill of turning negative into positive develops like a muscle and becomes almost instinctive over time. Start by saying “No problem” a whole lot more. Pretty soon, you’ll condition your mind to believe it.

COLLABORATION WITH: Mera Limpao II

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‘’THIS WORKS FOR ME TOO!’’

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Dear Ate Sar,

Gusto ko lang i-share yung problema ko tungkol sa sarili ko. Napansin ko lang na ang bilis kong ma-depress, ang liit ng self-esteem ko, at ang hilig kong mag-overthink. Yung feeling na ‘’I’ll never be good enough’’. Lagi ko yung nararamdaman. Pag napapadaan ako sa may mga salamin at nakikita ko sarili ko, parang ang dami ko pang pagkukulang. Minsan napapatingin rin ako sa ibang babae tapos na-fu-frustrate ako kasi di ko sila magaya na bagay sa lahat. Tapos pati sa bahay, parang lagi na lang akong kinukumpara sa ibang tao. Na parang kahit anong gawin kong effort, hindi pa rin ma-a-appreciate or enough. Hindi lang sa bahay, pati na rin sa ibang tao. Naisip ko na baka naiinis sila sa ugali ko. So yun, ang bilis kong ma-depress, hilig mag-overthink. Gusto ko sana tigilan yung habit na laging nag-ooverthink at nade-depress pero di ko ma-figure out paano. Pwde mo ba ako tulungan o bigyang ng motivation? Maraming salamat!

Malika

Dear Malika,

Napagdaanan ko na rin yan. Alam ko yung feeling na yan. Yung feeling na hindi ka magiging sapat. Yung titingin ka sa salamin tapos hindi mo magugustuhan yung nakikita mo. Yung gusto mo baguhin yung nararamdaman mo sa sarili mo, pero di mo magawang mahalin sarili mo. Siguro galing ka sa isang masamang relasyon na nakalimutan mo nang mahalin sarili mo, na iniisip mo na walang magmamahal sayo bilang ikaw. Lagi mong tandaan ito kapag feeling mo ‘’you’ll never be good enough’’.

Someone loves you. You are someones’s whole world. May mga kaibigan kang nagmamahal sayo kahit hindi mo nakikita. There are people who want you to love yourself the way they love you.

Minsan, hindi mo kailangan ng ibang tao para malaman kung anong worth mo bilang tao. You need to know and love yourself first.

You don’t have to be size 0 para masabing maganda ka. Lahat ng tao, unique. You are who you are. Kapag natutunan mong mahalin sarili mo, siguro ma-a-achieve mo yung true happiness.

Focus on the good, not on your flaws. If you have pretty smile or great sense of humor, ipakita mo. Stop comparing yourself to others. Dahil wala namang perpektong tao e. Everyday, tumingin ka sa salamin, say five things out loud what you love about yourself.

Only let people in your life who lift you up. If you have a friend or someone who puts you down or makes you feel worthless, pabayaan mo sila. They don’t deserve you. 

Wear something that makes you beautiful. Show the world what you’re made of.

 From someone who thinks you’re beautiful and good enough,

Ate Sar

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Habib Ali Al-Jifri: “This is a lesson we need to learn today. That the relationship between a man and woman should be rooted in selflessness.”

“The Prophet never forgot Lady Khadija, never stopped mentioning her after her death, even 10 years later, 11 years later, until he passed away himself.”

The Greatest Love Story in Islam: The Prophet Muhammad (SAW) and Khadijah (RA)

Many of what we call ‘love stories’ today are nothing more than stories of lust and desire, physical attraction disguised as love. Yet, I can find no love story more powerful, more spiritually uplifting, more awe inspiring as that of Prophet Muhammad (SAW) and Khadijah (RA). It is a shining example of what an ideal marriage is. I cannot help but reflect upon, one of the greatest of all love I’ve known. And it is the kind of love that I want.

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MANDALA

Sun and Moon

Sun and moon signify the basic principle of life, where there is good, there will also be bad. They also represent the fact that everything has a dark and a light side. Nothing in the world we have created is perfect. The essence of being human is the lack of perfection. Both these ideas occur simultaneously in everyone’s life and there cannot be only good or bad in any person’s life. As the sun rises and sets everyday, every person has his days of glories and nights of darkness in his life. Some people also believe that the union of the sun and the moon represents unity in diversity or the feeling of oneness. The sun and the moon also represent cycles. Everything has a cycle: that which lives must die. Cycles are a necessary part of life, and they make life all the more worth living.

I placed an anchor in the center as it can be something/someone who holds one in place, and can provide strength to hold on no matter how rough things may get.

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To people who expects so much from me:

PLEASE understand that I’m not perfect. I make mistakes and I say things I don’t mean. I have an indecisive and over analytic brain that’s beyond my control, even though I always try to control it. I’m not a judgmental person, but I’ve been guilty of judging a book by its cover. Sometimes I lie because I’m too scared for people to see what’s really hidden behind closed doors. I can be pushy, selfish, and overconfident. But also, I can be negative, careless, and I can feel as if all the weight in the world is placed on my shoulders. I can be the happiest person on this planet, but also I can feel as if I’m just done with everything. I get good grades but I also get bad ones. I’m not a perfect person and throughout my whole life I’m going to be disappointed, brought down, and discouraged. However, I’m also going to disappoint, bring down, and discourage. Life is full of ups, downs, lefts, and rights. It’s full of lessons and it’s full of mysteries. Achieving perfection is nothing but a myth. The only way we can really achieve perfection is by making our own definition. I guess all I’m trying to say is I’m only human — along with everybody in this world. I’ll continuously hurt and be hurt, laugh and make someone laugh, and also love and be loved. It is what it is. Life’s only what you make of it.

I know I’m not perfect but I’m trying my best to do good, be good, and at least meet the expectations of everyone else. 

(Writing this essay/letter was a challenging thing to do. I first had to realize that I had flaws, and that everyone makes mistakes just like I do. So I wrote this to also let people know that they are not alone in making mistakes. It’s natural. Things happen).

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READ THIS IF YOU’RE FEELING DOWN/STRESSING OUT

Hey, you!

Yes, you!

Did you know that:

You’re loved

You’re important

You’re strong 

You’re wonderfully made

You’re beautiful

You have purpose

You’re good enough

You’re beautiful

You’re worthy

You’re amazing

You’re wanted

You’re needed

I also want to remind you that:

Everything is going to be okay

It’s only a bad day, not a bad life

It’s okay to cry!

It’s okay to lay in bed all day

It’s okay to eat whatever you want

Your feelings are valid

You’re not weak

You’re not a burden

You’re not alone

You’re more than all this sadness

You deserve happiness

Your life matters

Don’t forget to take care of yourself:

Rest and relax

Drink lots of water

Stretch

Go out and breathe in some fresh air

Sleep when you need it

Surround your life with positive people

Do things that make you happy!

I truly believe that in order for you to take the first step, you must put that phone down, get off of your computer, stop reading this, and live your life to the fullest. Give it everything you’ve got. You’re not alone. You’re going to get through this and come out on the other side stronger than you ever knew was possible. 

“You’ve got this”. 

When stressing out in school:

Remember that intelligence is subjective, and academic achievement is not always a proper way to measure it. Success as a student is largely dependent on one’s ability to operate within a certain system, but it’s not always the best preparation for the real world. A person’s character, experiences and connections, not grades, ultimately determine their direction in life. Success requires passion, perseverance, emotional intelligence and the ability to understand the value of failure. In the end, grades are just arbitrary letters on a page. True achievement is a product of making observable and altruistic changes in the real world.

So if you’re having a hard time getting good grades and honors, don’t despair. Life is full of ups and downs, and while we learn a great deal in school, the real education occurs after you leave the classroom. Never stop learning, never give up and remember to enjoy the ride along the way!

                                                   FROM FRIENDS

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‘’Personal Development and Career Goals’’

Achievements:

Career Goals:

Feel happier and more positive during workday.

Develop more friendships at work and try to be less competitive.

Double sales or productivity.

Pick up and learn a new skill.

Be known as an expert in a certain field or area.

To be paid only as much as the job position is worth for the company.

Satisfied with whatever job I am doing.

Gets into a stable company.  

One of my goals for the future is to be happy regardless of what I choose to do. I want to be satisfied with my decisions, to be able to accept and forgive, and most of all to be able to live up to the expectations I have for myself. I realize I cannot set my goals and dreams on the basis of others and I need to achieve things for myself. I will only accomplish my goal in being happy when I am able to live my life for myself and still able to provide love and support to others.

My other goal is to give my parents a better life than what we have now. They deserve the best and I would like to offer that to them when I finish my education. I believe nothing is impossible in this world as long you are determined to make it possible. If I don't finish school and if I don't strive for my very best I would amount to be nothing to this world and it will not open any or new doors in my life. I am proud of myself that I stayed strong and challenged in this cruel world. 

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                                        ‘’The Selfie Project’’

Hey there! My name is Sarah Malika B. Magondacan. I live in Iligan City, Philippines, and I am currently 16 years old. I was born on 29th February of 2000. Soooo, that makes me a leapling/leap-year baby! I always expect people telling me how lucky I am but I don’t feel anything special because I’m leading a perfectly normal life just like everyone else. 

I am an only child. I'm often asked if I was lonely growing up without siblings. I really wasn't. Without siblings around to play with, I was forced to figure out ways to entertain myself. I was comfortable being alone very early on. When this was combined with my teenage desire to be independent from my parents, it became very frustrating that I always had my parents' attention. I felt like I was always being watched. But I enjoyed being an only child. I never felt like I was competing with anyone or anything for my parents' attention. Whenever I needed to or wanted to talk about something, I had an attentive parent. As a result, I was always fully supported in my major interests.

As for my hobbies and passions I really love just spending time with friends and family, watching KDramas/KShows, surfing the net, and singing.

🙊 I might seem shy at first, but in reality I’m very sociable.

🍍 I really love food, but I like also to keep my body fit so…I’m sure you know what I’m talking about (small fights between stomach and brain).

👠 Addicted to every type of clothing. 😻 Loves cute stuff/things

🌾 Keeping on with good vibes and smiling every day (anyway I know I’m very moody).

☺ If something is in God’s will, it will happen.

I hope to be a doctor someday. And as of now, my focus is to finish my studies and enjoy my youth. I don’t stress on the past and my future but rather I try to focus and enjoy what’s in my present.

Other than all this I’m just your typical 16 year old trying to figure out where I fit in this world. ✨