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Suzanne Collins really looked at all the fans simping and fangirling over TBoSaS!Snow and slammed SotR in their faces to say, “Keep going” and I am LIVING for it.

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When some celebrities/actors are so insanely pretty that I have to channel my envy into making them a face claim for an OC-

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It’s such a weird thing when you’ve been complaining about this thing for so long (two years) and in a matter of three hours that problem is no more.

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I watched the production of Oedipus at the Old Vic today, and I really enjoyed it overall, despite many reviews bashing it!! I was in the same room as Rami Malek so that in itself was so, so cool, and I snuck a video/picture during the curtain call, so I now have Rami Malek in my camera roll in a bloody shirt! Indira Varma was amazing as well (her acting is so freaking good), and the chorus’ choreography was absolutely incredible (one of my favourite aspects)!

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Having to change all my bio descriptions from minor to 18/legal is the worst reality check ever.

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AB’s Writing Blog / spatial-jump / thetempscommission

“No, my consciousness is fifty-eight.” — Five Hargreeves, the Umbrella Academy

BRIEF ABOUT ME:

Female, minor, Asian British (Indian), Pisces, INTP/INTJ, Gryffindor, daughter of Poseidon, reader, writer, procrastinator, grammar freak, likes aquamarine and royal purple, plays netball and badminton, is barely surviving A-levels (in Maths, Economics and Classical Civilisations), basically a British version of Five Hargreeves

SOCIALS:

Tumblr: Main

Quotev: Main, Writing Account

Wattpad: Main

AO3: Main

Pinterest: Main

Discord: ABADA17

FANDOMS I WRITE FOR:

(The universes I’m weak on are towards the end of the list.)

Harry Potter, Marauders Era, Fantastic Beasts, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Heroes of Olympus, the Umbrella Academy, the Maze Runner, the Hunger Games, Stranger Things, Once Upon a Time, Anne With an E, Divergent, Chronicles of Narnia

MY WORKS MASTERLIST:

(The list below is all my published works. All of my WIPs, both published and unpublished, can be found here.)

(Key: Q = Quotev, WP = Wattpad, AO3 = Archive of Our Own, Completed [note: none of them])

Harry Potter Universe: Is Anything Better Done Than Said? (Q), IT WAS THE NIFFLER ( a Time-Turner story ) (Q, WP, AO3), RUN. (Q), Sweetest Kind (Q), Did You See the Moon? (Q), Marauders: A New Tale (Q), Sisters of House Black (Q), Descendants of the Founders (Q)

Riordanverse: N/A

The Umbrella Academy Universe: N/A

The Maze Runner Universe: N/A

The Hunger Games Universe: N/A

Stranger Things Universe: N/A

Once Upon a Time Universe: N/A

Crossovers: Destined to Die (Q, WP, AO3)

Non-Fanfics/Quizzes: Reading Preferences (Q), SMUDGED INK. (Q), Reasons to Hate Dumbledore (Q)

REQUESTS:

I am more than happy to receive requests — though, fair warning, I’ll be more obliged for a one-shot idea than an actual fic, since my tendency to procrastinate and get writer’s block is astounding.

Any one-shots that are written, whether inspired by my own sheer will or another, will be posted on Tumblr, as well as the other platforms I operate on (linked at the top of this post).

RULES AND INFORMATION:

I will not write any smut.

I will not write any inappropriate ships or tropes (e.g. incest, student/teacher, romanticising the wrong things, e.t.c.).

I do not mind writing expletives.

I do not have any triggers, so I am pretty much open to anything! I will, of course, provide warnings for readers.

I will almost definitely write canon x OC requests. For canon x canon characters, it does depend on the ship itself.

I am highly averse to love triangles, so please do not ask me to depict those! Jealousy ones are fine.

I am British, so I may use expressions and/or phrases that I don’t realise are slang here.

It may take me three hours or three months to write your request, as my inspiration is incredibly volatile. If yours falls into the latter, please be patient with me!

I reserve the right to decline any requests. Please don’t be offended and take it to heart if I do (unless it’s problematic)!

On that note, thank you for visiting my writing blog, and I hope you enjoy perusing my works!

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Happy Birthday (deep breath):

Luther, Diego, Allison, Klaus, Five, Ben, Viktor, Lila, Marcus, Fei, Alphonso, Sloane, Jayme, Christopher and all the other super-powered people born on 1st October 1989.

May you all rest in peace. 🌂

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How I speak to insects is how Five speaks to other human beings.

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You know what? I’m going to make a S4 analysis for each character because I have a lot to get off my chest and therapy isn’t free.

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It’s okay, guys. That wasn’t Five in S4. It was a Greek imposter with hideous hair called Jerome.

Look.

They are not the same person!!

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The way we thought this still was a really wholesome Hargreeves family moment when it was actually the scene that started the snowballing disaster of this final season.

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My only hope now to cleanse me of that indescribable season is fanfiction. Reading it, writing it, manifesting it, you name it.

I do have some ideas for TUA fanfictions, and I can assure you, if I ever progress to/they are set in S4, I will definitely change some things up.

The only reason I waited before I started writing fanfics for TUA was because I wanted all the canon aspects, to make sure anything I wrote wouldn’t contradict with anything mentioned (which I’ve seen with fanfictions released before S3 and S4). But now, now I can get writing.

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Spoilers for all episodes of the Umbrella Academy Season 4 and profanity below.

What the actual fuck was that finale?? Was I watching the same thing directors looked at and went, “Yeah, this is cool!”

Those last two episodes were a total shit show. An absolutely horrendous finale to a wonderful TV show.

The first thing I am so fucking pissed about is how they’ve written Five in this season. They ruined him. They tore apart the aloof apocalypse-obsessed arsehole who loves his family, destroyed it, spat on it, and then danced on the grave before crushing it under an anvil.

In no fucking timeline whatsoever would Five and Lila be a thing. I understand where some people would come from to defend it — that yes, they were both isolated for seven years and could only find company in each other, distorting their relationship as they sought comfort which mistakenly and incorrectly transpired into ‘love’. No, it’s messed up. It’s so fucking messed up and creates unnecessary drama that the writers probably wanted since they were undeniably lacking in the finale. When I first saw the camera angles and shots they were getting prior to Year Five in the subway, I was naïvely thinking, “Surely not. Please don’t tell me this is where I think it’s going.” And lo and behold, I was right. And I’ve never hated to be right so much in my entire life.

Lila (WHO HAS THREE ADORABLE CHILDREN WITH DIEGO, BY THE WAY) has known Five for absolutely ages — since he was in the body of a thirteen-year-old child. Mentally, he’s however many decades older. Regarding the actors, Aidan and Ritu, themselves, there is a fifteen-year gap between them. But my point is, Five is not a home-wrecker. Five is the type of character who would not deliberately fuck around with his brother’s wife because he absolutely adores his family. It’s not in the nature that has been presented to us, and goes completely against his values — and for what? To serve exclusively as a shitty love triangle so that Diego and Five would fight in the finale and break up the family even more at the most crucial point for them?

Five is your textbook example of a pragmatist. He knows how to prioritise, and would certainly not decide that the time to fight Diego was when two of their siblings were badly injured and another had merged to bring about the Cleanse — a.k.a. end of the world, again.

I am so, so disappointed with this, especially as Five is the character I’ve had the strongest attachment to, ever. I think I’ve managed to disconnect S4 him from the first three (that fucking greasy rat’s nest hair of his has finally been given a beneficial purpose), but I’m still sick to my stomach.

Anyway, next thing: the episodes. I know we were told in advance about how there were only going to be six episodes, and we knew they had a lot to fit in to make it work.

It didn’t. It was executed very poorly. I understand some fans didn’t like the unnecessary subplots and fillers from the previous seasons, but S4 was a bit too rushed? I mean, they found and drank the marigold within the first episode. And floundered around at the end, not even bothering to stop the Cleanse until it had been aired on TV. I get they might’ve wanted to make the show more fast-paced, but it could’ve been handled differently. They didn’t have to do a ‘Stranger ThingsTM’ and make four goddamn films for a Part One. They just needed to properly iron out everything, and that didn’t happen, which is a massive shame.

The finale itself (not the erasing their identities, but from the moment Ben is shot) deserves some YouTuber to pick it apart with a four hour video until it’s dust. It was badly structured. Normally, you see a rather pleasant — not exactly linear, but in the concept we’re progressing positively — pattern as the episodes and plots build up to the finale. We see the family find out about an apocalypse, they fight and break off individually, then they slowly pair up, eventually coming together to save the world. This was not like that.

Instead, you had one sibling fucking around in a subway with his physically much older and mentally much younger sister-in-law, another that was hopelessly obsessed with a girl he just met (but no hate for him — no one exactly told him that being closer to Jennifer was just harming them both and the world), one germaphobe who, despite not taking drugs or drinking, is off looting money wherever he can find it and deciding that was the moment to pay off his debts??, three others doing fuck knows, and then the last one who actually gives a shit, teamed up with his hideous father, and tried to prevent him from killing Ben as long as possible because he knows what it’s like to end the world, and is therefore the only one who did anything useful. God, that was a long sentence, so I’m sorry for those of you who struggle with it.

The finale was not your Umbrella Academy finale. Once everyone had (I say this in the lightest way) been ‘brought together’, they had no bloody idea what to do. In the meantime, they’d disbanded about three times within the thirty minutes of screening because of petty fights and the drama I’ve already discussed. Five leaving them at the most essential moment (due to Lila and Diego, blah, blah, blah) was an error in his character. This old man has survived through apocalypses, the one who tries to round everyone up despite everything he has seen. Even with his doubts in the S3 finale, he was still there — and his doubts were shared enough that they created a majority. In this S4 finale, there was no majority. It was just Five, and Five alone. There were gaping holes and shredded pieces of the beautifully developed characters the show had done so well in portraying. They did this with Allison during that scene in S3, where they took her villain arc too far. There are so many flaws in this, and there is definitely many people out there who can communicate it better and more concisely, but here is my two pennies anyway.

I have a lot more thoughts, but I’m currently bone-tired. I might post another rant if I remember anything else — but don’t be too surprised if it’s Five x Lila related.

I am thankful and appreciative that the Umbrella Academy was one of the lucky shows that saw its way to the very end, but I think all of us are entitled to a little disappointment at its quality and execution as it was brought to a close.

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As soon as I walked into the leisure centre, fifteen minutes after S4 was released, Don’t Stop Me Now (the very song that plays in the background when Five is fighting Hazel and Cha Cha in Gimbel’s in S1) started playing. Don’t try and tell me that this is a coincidence.

Update: [I’ve Had] The Time of My Life (karaoke song at Luther’s bachelor party) played as well. This is fate.

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☂️🌂

I will be a changed person when TUA S4 comes out. I will simultaneously feel whole but eternally destroyed inside. Can’t believe tomorrow is the last time I will see my favourite dysfunctional family :’)

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The Umbrellas fighting the Sparrows in S3 E1 is basically Greeks vs Romans, and I cannot un-see it.

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Priorities? Yeah, I have priorities… like watching the AGGGTM TV show right here, right now.