#^Idk if you guys are interested in those(besides school ofc) as well

[im04]

hi hiii!!! your art is so scrum-diddly-upmtious!!! *leaves with suspicious art shape in throat* <333

AAaaa thANk q so much!! TTTTTT

Careful don't choke on it *cuts it into small pieces and stuffs it back down your throat gently*

(And also sorry if that sounded weird)

[inknose]

mdzs read diary part IV, the end

It’s inspiring how much self care wwx is gonna finally get now that his husband will go along with whatever he does, so he’s gotta look out for lwj’s well being if not his own. that is emphatically the STUFF

dragging my hands down I face as I read this, after all these chapters of getting up close and personal with ghouls bleeding from every orifice, slaying ancient beasts, rebelling against the entire cultivation world, the two of them are absolutely paralyzed by middle school crush sleepover math

chicken

he actually drew kissy doodles .... he....

IDK I THINK I JUST DOCUMENTED THIS PART CUZ I WAS STILL SCREAMING you cant expect me to have very useful things to say at this point

this is torture you are both so mushy you are so GONE

This part really stood out to me, it’s an attitude I feel like wwx implies with his inner narration a few times but most clearly says here: he’s not one for allowing himself to exaggerate how bad his circumstances are/could be even a little bit - he’s already lived through some extreme low points and found a way to keep going, so he never makes sweeping statements about what he couldn’t live without (Inner JingYi: you’re supposed to say you’d be lost without him here!!!) Instead he seems to accept as a given that being alive doesn’t guarantee him any pleasantness or joy at all, and as a result his feelings toward being in TRUE LOVE are surprisingly pragmatic, but also colored with such gratitude. There are a lot of things in the novel that struck me, like this, as being just a little to the left of familiar tropes/sentiments, and were more touching for it. Whether it be the influence of culture difference as opposed to what I’m used to reading in most western romance stories, or MXTX’s unique outlook, or a combination of both, it was really refreshing and made me pause over it. Not “I can’t imagine living without you” but “I could be living without you, but instead I get to be with you and I think that’s the best thing that could happen.”

ADJFDKFJ THE UST BEING SO STRONG THAT EVEN THE VILLAIN COMMENTS ON IT IN THE MIDDLE OF EXECUTING HIS EVIL PLANS IS ONE OF THOSE THINGS THAT WILL NEVER FAIL TO MAKE ME LAUGH MY ASS OFF. hes like god damn! here I thought I had problems

it was at this moment that I realized we were doing this Now... I’m still recovering. What a scene. I am so glad I saw the most incredible fanart soon afterwards, bc the fact that someone has already drawn a perfect comic of this part means I don’t have to

I love you so much, you are so annoying, you are perfect... I like how he’s been experiencing openly requited love for all of ten minutes but he’s already figured out how to weaponize it to piss people off

doing!!! his!!! job!!!!!

ahh... it’s a really good story. JGY is a great character. One of the most interesting differences for me between drama watching vs. novel reading experience is that without an actor to bat his vulnerable doe eyes at you and smile faintly with his cute dimples, the book does not go much out of its way to try to lull the reader into a false sense of security around him or *endear* him to you the way the show does. But just by seeing events through wei wuxian’s POV, its still enough to evoke pity or understanding towards him. The overall impression is a bit more detached though, there’s less emphasis on the spectacle of how he could manipulate everyone closest to him and more of a general feeling of resigned tragedy that everyones the worst on this bitch of an earth.

I CANNOT DEAL WITH YOU FOR EVEN ONE MORE SECOND!!!!

I clearly paused to take note of less and less parts at the end & the extras due to: a) too excited to reach the end b) too spicy to photograph and c) too sleepy cuz I kept reading in the middle of the night. but I absolutely took the time for Bro We Are Teens appreciation corner:

I’d absolutely read 40 more extra chapters of their monster-of-the-week field trip antics.

god... poor Jin Ling now basically has to deal with divorced parents that talk shit about each other to him whenever he is saying with one of them. except they are both his uncles. just a disasterhood of all uncles from start to finish. AUUUGH wei wuxian and jiang cheng have fucked me up completely, I dream of them reconciling but I also REFUSE to believe it would ever be easy. let me know if theres a fanfic that absolutely tortures you for decades before they hug

HAHAHA oh no this man ain’t making it to immortality thats for damn sure. HE’S JUST GONNA TRY AS HARD AS HE CAN HIS WHOLE LIFE NOT TO LOOK AT HIM BUT THEYRE *MARRIED* SDLKFJSF ohhhh it’s too funny, like... the mundane domestic family drama IN the fantastical swords and sorcery setting is what really ratchets up these things from amusing to fucking hilarious I think

aaaa the end... final random thoughts? No not final, I would like to please keep discussing at length and exhaustively, all the time please - CQL has gotta be one of the best TV adaptations I’ve seen. ANY adaptation of anything would be lucky to be so good!! reading the novel has just made me appreciate it even more.

- I don’t think I can do justice to what I find most fascinating about comparing the two versions briefly, to do that I need to get drunk and ramble at my friends for hours but... the condensed version is something like this. Really all the significant differences between the two versions (besides the ones which can be attributed to censorship and therefore aren’t worth discussing) are a side effect of the structure of how the story is told - there’s barely anything changed arbitrarily. Aside from having a cold opening, the drama sticks to a very linear version of the story, and I think for a TV show or film, that’s probably the best way to do it. We see everything, we get shocked and tricked and betrayed and surprised along with the characters, we feel the biggest impact at the climactic scenes having experienced all the build-up. The novel on the other hand is not only much more non-linear in WHEN we learn bits and pieces of information, but that information is also obfuscated under wei wuxian’s multiple layers of Unreliable Narratoritis, which are as follows: 1) difficulty remembering things because of personality/avoiding painful memories/actual memory loss, 2) No Homo Goggles still on, and 3) a wry sense of humor that makes the reader unsure of how much they can trust his attitude toward things, especially near the beginning. The experience of reading is a puzzle the reader has to mentally piece together through all of the above listed camouflage, and the puzzle itself is a three-sided mystery: One - How Bad of a guy was Wei WuXian really, and how exactly did all the bad stuff in his life go down; Two - wangxian epic pride & prejudice gambits; Three - political murder mystery. (I love stories like this btw... though I fully admit I’m glad I watched first this time bc it might have taken me a long time to tackle otherwise.) Because of this, where the drama wants to pull you in and submerge you in all the most potent emotional parts, the novel in direct contrast deliberately side-steps around these things and asks that you hurt yourself by filling in the blanks. In fact the more intense emotions and painful memories involved, whether it be his relationship with jiang yanli, his DEATH, the darkest days of war times etc, the more the novel evasively withholds details. I actually really like both styles of storytelling but each one is obviously way better suited to its medium. ANYWAY.... THATS BASICALLY WHERE MY BRAINS AT WHILE IM READING GAY SWORD WIZARD BOOKS

- The extras are so saturated with domestic married bliss that it’s a good thing I stopped taking pictures because I’d just take a picture of every page. this is too much for me to take... I did jump the gun a few times and read a few fanfics while I was still mid-read of the book (I tried to hold out but alas I am mortal) and at one point after finishing I was like “wow what fic was it in where lwj says something cute and wwx kisses him in public but they’re in the corner of the restaurant so no one really sees... OH NO WAIT that was actually in there.” and ... and that’s the LEAST OF IT... *stares into the distance* theyre married wow

- I ofc couldn’t help but see a few vague blogs beforehand so honestly I was braced for something like, wildly ooc for the sake of porn to happen in the extras... I definitely appreciate how the incense burner porn interludes could be uhhh a lot for many people and not my personal cup of tea in terms of smut however [here follows the words of a poisonous frog who has dwelt her whole life in the rainforests of BL] the concept is also surprisingly SWEET SDFLKJF like wwx sees lan wangji’s darkest mixed-up violent teenage fantasies and he’s just like aww babe you had a crush on me!! just... good for them

- I swear I’m not gonna rehash every cute married thing they do but wei wuxian grading papers in the tub........................rEALLY GOT ME

- I want to Draw - ok thats enough if I keep going I’ll just write “wei wuxian grading papers in the tub” seven more times probably

[bnha-imagines-hcs]

Hey dude! You're making great stuff! Could I please have B, K, and W from the fluff prompt for Aizawa, Hizashi and Spinner? You know Aizawa and Hizashi are my darlings, but I've recently developed a fondness for the lizard boi.Thank you so much!

( the lizard boi… is kinda cute. but what is UP with his SWORDs!? | also i fucking love kamojis… JesUs ChrisT )

fluff alphabet;

| aizawa; headcanons.

BREATH     just exist… in his life… y ea h. tbh aizawa is just always A Huge Fan of u and the fact ur there in a nice way, so like??? yeethaw bby always a fan.

he a sucker for the whole boyfriend shirt thing, it’s just he doesn’t have a whole lotta clothes beside his professional look (dress shirt and slacks) and his actual working look (fuckin… pullover/overall/bodysuit thing lmfao wtf). you could,, ofc,,,,,, put on a huge frigging sweater - the kind commonly used as a dress - and like… thigh highs…. ehrem. (kitty pattern optional but super effective.) and just. hair down (or up) and just. and just.

                    be there.

also if u ever back him up or lead him in a fight, whether it’s frontline business or just you tryin ur best to evacuate a few peeps, well… that’ll do the trick. #synergy TM. he loves the fact ur partners, so anything that actively demonstrates/proves this is… multo bene.

honestly tho just breathe this hobo is a total softie and he so weak for love… so weak for love.

KISS    he actually adores kisses, yet doesn’t indulge often - as with most things that bring him simple pleasure & relaxation, shouta straight up forgets. just- forgets about it. 

it’s not small pecks and chaste things that he really adores - those are. kinda awkward, really. if it makes ya happy go for it, gestures, but. ehh. eh? eh.

long and involved kisses, that’s where it’s at.                                     hands messing w/ ur hair as he draws you close or draws in close himself or both or (we’re very big on equality here), able to drown in dark & warm comfort, feeling u and keeping u locked away in his little corner of the world until you’re ready to go. these happen in private, if aizawa can help it. it’s his prize for bein’ a martyr all the damn time (cough needlessly hard on himself cough), so the rest of the world can fuck off and just let him have this.

he doesn’t initiate ‘long and involved’ in public; don’t mistake this for a lack of interest! he’s just being decent (●´∀｀●)

WILD CARD     the only thing high-maintenance about shouta is the situational factors. he just wants to chill, have a home that is place & person, someone he can have intelligent conversation and comfortable silence with… just to share their lives without infringing on each other too much.he’s very… myeah. non-conventional? if you’re poly and he’s not, have fun with that it’s cool. if you’re busy a lot like him, that’s cool. if you wanna live separately, np. if you need to take time to yourself for a couple years, you do you.what he does demand is truthfulness. not that you don’t have secrets, but that you can just say ‘man i don’t wanna tell you’, rather than deceit. he’s a liiiiiiiittle sensitive about lies, even small ones.

2) also.. he loves to just read together. he doesn’t have a fireplace but if he did, it’d be readin’ by the fire.

| hizashi; headcanons.

BREATH     no offence but this man’s usually short of breath, what with the constant noice production. the things about life that leave him breathless are what drive him, what fuel him - it’s always somewhere on his mind.if he ain’t livin’ his best life, he about to.

so honestly? hmmm. he’s most often kinda in that state, but – ohhh yeah. big droopy sweater + thigh highs used as sleepwear or just. just. on his s/o… pls sit on his lap. pretty please? pleeeassseee… frick.movie night and it’s warm enough and u come out in that and sidle up to him and oh ooohhhh b o y . he’ll just curl an arm arnd you and light his hand upon ur arm, real gentle, not pouncing or w/e just - enjoying tf out of that.

KISS    mmmmmmmm, y e s. hizashi does not, in fact, believe in PDA - the term and general consensus suggests that displays of affection are somehow meant to be absent from day to day life, as though we ought hide our hearts and pretend to be cardboard.not exactly this guy’s thing.

where shouta will seek out privacy for a kiss with real feeling, hizashi– won’t. sure, if things get particularly heated he’ll suggest a break or a, hah, room (if others haven’t already). but as long as it’s warm loving mmmmm yes i love you mmmm hizashi feels there’s nothing improper about it and will give very few shits about commentary. you will end up in a bitchfight with him if u push it- kisses without wandering hands are not indecent, gdu, and any attempt to make he or his partner feel shame over it will be met with… vehement opposition.

alternatively if you are simply highly uncomfortable and respectful about it, ofc they can save it for when you’re not forced to be in the same room as them. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

     every kiss is a real kiss \o/. hizashi positively glows under the weight of lil pecks and ‘i’m leaving’ / ‘i’m back’ / ‘i’m gonna miss u already’ / etc cheek kisses. very fond of the ‘let’s kiss every lil bit of ur face’ style. subscribed to ‘oh? you think this part of u is undesirable? KISSSSSS’ series. proud author of ‘3 hours of body worship is an aperitif, my love’.

WILD CARD     swings and like, those old-school playgrounds for preteens - those are still the shit. hizashi loves lazing around on a swing, gently rocking back and forth while talking about everything or nothing. it’s easy, there’s literally no pressure whatsoever, it’s nostalgic.pushing each other on the swings?? chill as fuck. riding those errr those things w/ the big-ass springs underneath - also cool. oh my god riding those things err SHIT IDK WHAT IT’S CALLED ... ‘cable ways’ ..? The Shit.

just innocent play time pls. no stress & chill.

| spinner; headcanons.

BREATH.      pls. pls play games w/ him and go wild - that’ll do it. if you rock out playing racing / gta / etc games, he’ll love watching u go go go and just. hang back. needlessly awe-struck. it’s just nice to share smth he loves, smth non-serious without strain, and have the person he likes enjoy themselves with it.

KISS     well it’s scaly, we can’t deny that. ‘s not bad though, and that’s esp true if you’re more of a monster fucker than a coward. smooth, stumbly, and generally a lil awkward cuz he’s not at all used to ppl even ??? wanting ?? a lil smoochy smooch from him??? yeah.

eager, though. spinner’s got pretty normal dreams with yer picket fences and vidya games and maybe even a house that’s like inhabitable… yeah. a life where you can just reach out and touch and have it be affection rather than… disgust……… he’s always more affectionate than sexual - that’s more important to him, and his self-image is such that getting turned on doesn’t even really happen. and boy does he have an assortment of cute lil kisses as a result.

soft, careful pecks to test the waters even though you’ve responded well 50 times already - spinner’s someone who’ll ask for permission more often than not, wary of finding out something good has become something… not so good. it��s a hang-up he’ll not let go of soon. lingering ‘i can’t believe this is happening oh shit should i move? fuck am i-’ cheek kisses while he’s arched awkwardly to reach over the couch.sloppy ‘i can’t believe i’m this lucky but i’m too sleepy to question it’ morning / late night kisses.‘hey i was gone for a while and i can’t believe u still want me to kiss u!!! sc o rrrrrre and also oh god are u ALRIGHT.’ less restrained, embraces, face kisses, accidentally kissing ur eye. that happened.he has an excited ‘oh my god u made us hot chocolate’ kiss that stems from i’m living the fucking life finally ho god. 

he’s just. so happy. so happy to have someone he likes and likes him back, smn he can just be domestic with. sure he does crazy shit, but he loves to.. be homey. and lots and lots of little, tentative kisses at every opportunity.

also mini hand touches, but he’s still working on that.

WILD CARD     pls sit on his shoulders and let him scale rooftops like that. adrenaline junking together is The BeesKnees. u wanna get thrown?? the boi will throw u. u wanna cliff dive?? yeet let’s go. u wanna rollercoasterrrrrr rid es. s /? !? ?!? FUCK YES LE’S GO.

[wolgrahas]

not to be horny on main bbbuuut....

it’s a fuck-ass long rant so beware lads ;’)

i just want to find someone who i can have a deep connection with and.... fuck a lot ahgagahahssjkd

i’m  a virgin and i’m horny and i have severe social anxiety and i wanna fuck with someone afdhsdagsdshs, but... with someone i love ://

and the worst thing is that i’ve been reading a lOT of smut aka written porn with felings the past days and fffffcukkkk i just wanna have someone i can share my body with and both feel good... and i’m 20 which makes everything worse bc i have never had sex and neither i’ve been interested in anyone (just... one boy... in high school... who was the only one who treated me well and well... i was 14 and fucking depressed and my family and friends treated me like shit so it was like “oooooh shit, someone who treats me well... now i wanna fuck him :))” it was kind of weird tbh, tho we didn’t even talked that much sfhfsgdagsfsdc) 

and one of the worst things is that... if i hate my (naked) body so fucking much that i can’t even show it to my mother, nor sister..... and especially any doctor (and worse if they’re a man afshsfahsfg) (and yes, a gynecologist has never checked on me agswfgdfgf) how the fUCK AM I GOING TO BE NAKED IN FRONT OF SOMEONE???? i mean... in the dress up rooms i had to change my clothes in one of the bathroom’s cabins while the rest of the girls dressed up in front of each other... and i remember the first time i had to take a shower in a broading school and i.... started crying in silence bc the glasses that separated every shower weren’t opaque :)))) ffuck... i just hate being this weak... i wanna cry m8

i’m losing the chance of meeting wonderful people and having great experiences bc of my mental illnesses... bc they make me feel like shit with such simple stuff like buying food in a supermarket or take a walk outside??? g0D i’m sooooo fucking tired man.... i just wanna be able to talk to people like a normal person, i don’t even want to be the life of the party ://

i’m so desperate to find someone who i can have a deep connection with... bc i have never had someone who understood me fully... who had the same interests... who we could share the same points of view... who i could be intimate... i have nEVER been myself with friends, sometimes i was myself with my family but they called (and keep calling me) stupid for expressing how i’m feeling or my thoughts... i just want someone who i can rely on... 

i was used to be alone most of my life... but this emptiness... this loneliness... this... hatred towards.... myself??? it is MCfucking exhausting, i can no longer stand it, i’m tired. but... what if i’m a manipulative, toxic lil bitch with my partner??? what if i’m an asshole??? what if i.........  fuck things up??? what if.... idk man, i just think that i will be hateful bitch... bc my family always told me that i was a “psycho” and a “snake” some years ago... well... my mother was the one who used to tell me these things mostly.... bc at first i hid my hatred towards her, but at the end i didn’t even care if she got offended tbqh and also: she’s a fucking abusive bitch agadfahd, bUT... i was angry, so sO fucking angry at them, so misunderstood and so alone... so... hated....i felt so guilty bc my mother is a single mother... and sometimes i thought she would had prefered if she had aborted me (even she told me that some months ago when we were arguing ahgdfhadghadg). besides, my life was a living hell in elementary and  high school... and then come back home and see that they treated me the same way wasn’t something quite wonderful y’know??, and i told them numerous times about how the bulies made fun of me and criticized my physical appearance (they constatntly called me “ugly” and even nicknamed me in elementary/high school lol) and they just usually said: “fight back” and i always thought: “gREAT BITCH, how can i fight if i stutter just looking at the bullies?????” and they were a group of six i think??? idk, and ofc, they were boys another point to prove why men suck :)))

now, how the fUCK can i have someone special in my life if i get nervous by just hearing people of my age come closer???  fffUCKKKKKKKKKKK bc in the php center i shared these thoughts and the other patients and therapist were like “but you have to meet new people to find the ‘special’ one :)” bITCH thank you i cOULDN’T EVEN KNOW THANKS FOR YOUR FUCKING ADVICE ughhhhhh, obviously i knew that shit, i just wanted to get it out of my chest and they just told me obvious stuff?? ok thanks... perks of being the only one who had severe social anxiety / avpd in the php center i guess??? ughhhh, obviously i smiled and said “thank you” bc i’m not an asshole :))), perhaps a fake bitch for not saying my real thoughts?? maybe

and besides... i haven’t talked about this with my psychologist, and i think is one of the most important things that is happening in my current life, bc srsly: i’m horny aLLL THE FUCKING TIME, but i don’t even wanna fuck anyone real, in my fantasies my partner doesn’t even have a face, it is just... the enjoyment of sharing something with someone you love and both having a good time, to be intimate with someone... but irl if a guy touches me like a handshake or touches my shoulder i become so fucking tense... with women same but not as much... i remember one of the php center therapies was massages and g0DDD i hated so fUCKING MUCHHH bc idk how the fUCK therapists didn’t notice how tense i was m8, i wanted to run away when we had that therapy and... ughhhhh i thought i was gonna die when my companion was a guy shghsfghf i just wanted to kick him the balls and run the fuck away and cry like a baby

and what i also hate about my situation is that i know lOTS of theory about: psychological and other forms of abuse when you are in a relationship (so basically, you can know when a guy is being an asshole, tho it’s not that easy bc you are in a such a bad mental state that you don’t even notice), advice when going to parties (which... tbh... i’ve never been in one, and in spain... people party a LOT agsfgfs), human physiology (y’kno... for the... ahem... sexual stuff  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), tho it’s useless bc the first time is nothing like you expect gdnabdnhgjad i guess??), postures, etc... and NO, I DIDN’T GET THIS INFORMATION BC OF PORN (basically, bc the porn industry is an industry full of abuses, sexism, unrealism and darker stuff y’kno, so... ahem... i hope the men in that industry leave women alone and those same women choke those men to death :))) ) i got it mostly by articles by sexologists and .... y’kno... people on the interenet which... i know is not a good idea ahaghhghgghgsa 

but anyway... i know i don’t have to rush... but.................. i wanna meet someone who i can be myself with??? who i can hold hands with?? who i can share the same interests?? who i can be... ahem... intimate??? that’s my wet dream m8, the sexual stuff is mostly my fantasy... but i think is bc our current society is oversexualized and quite obsessed with sex?? (thanks to the porn industry that basically only focus in the man’s pleasure and how to treat women like shit :))) ) but..... g0D, pls, why did you make me like this?? i’m such a fucking weird nerd m8, i don’t even know i’ll meet someone who i like??? all my crushes have been fictional characters?? and only one (1) guy at high school when i was 14 asfgshsfjhsjdhsgdhdg, and obviously nobody has ever had a crush on me ://, so i guess i’ll die alone ahghdsg

anyway thanks for reading the weird adventures in rami’s head, it was a pleasure lmao

[boo1a4]

11 question tag!

Hey guys so I was tagged by 5 of my fav gals to do the 11 questions tag (THATS 55 QUESTIONS WHY ARE YALL LIKE THIS) but anyway I was tagged by @s-lay-ing @sambashua @achuu-nice @indiepoptime and @yongpal-i (this tag is fucking eternal help me)

Cloud’s Questions!

Do you know a ksong by heart? (bc I don’t :x I can hum a trillion tho)

Blackpink’s As If Its Your Last, Heize’s Star, Day6 I loved you and You Were Beautiful, most of seventeens title tracks and most of their ballads, lastly  Pristin’s Aloha! I'm sure my pronunciation is way off but those are tho the ones that I've taken the time to actually sit down and learn!

When it comes to friendships, are you low or high maintenance? (As in your friends gotta talk everyday with you or you’ll feel like the friendship is dying OR if you can spend days without talking to them yet you still remain close)  

Ummmm I think it depends on the friendship? also I think I can tend to be a bit of both (cause I'm an insecure ass binch), tho I don't ever feel like my friendships are dying lmao

Do you have a secret that you will take to the grave? (Ofc I’m not asking you to reveal it)

not that I can think of?? like I'm sitting here thinking if there is anything and like honestly no????

Recommend me 5 songs (not necessarily kpop songs)

Dracula Teeth - The Last Shadow Puppets(honestly cloud just listen to all of their music is so great) Daydream In Blue - I Monster (this is honestly one of my all time fav songs I love it too much) No Way Down - The Shins (you know I can't go 2 mins without mentioning them, some great lyrics right here tho also give September a listen in beautiful) Beechwood Park - The Zombies (I'm assuming you know the zombies cloud but on the off chance that you don't BINCH THEY ARE MY ACTUAL FAVORITE well beside cream and zeppelin but they are up there) Kimbra - Miracle (kinda of a random one but this song just never seems to leave me!) Big Bird -Hyukoh (oh that was 6 BUT THIS SONG IS SO GREAT also listen to wing wing!!)

What do you prefer?: first, second or third gen kpop songs?

I generally prefer second generation??? I think????? I like a bit of all of them tho. but like there is no definitive answer to when each of the generations start and end so like I don't even know??? but most of my fav groups as far as music goes are older around 2nd gen but a fair amount of them are gen 3, I have a really strong love for kpop that was released between 2009-2014.

What’s the cheeeeeeeeeesiest thing you’ve done? (one time a former friend of mine was telling me about a problem she had and at the end of our convo I kissed her in the forehead bYE)

girl idk just my whole fucking life tbh, but my family members and irl friends will all tell you I do this thing where I yell sing songs and change the lyrics to their names this includes badly sung kpop songs IM SCREAMING THO CLOUD WHO ARE YOU AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

If you were asked to participate in a variety show, which one of the following would you pick and why? (Pick two!): problematic men, master key, hello counselor, weekly idol, one fine day, law of the jungle

um probs ofd?? id say weekly idol also but damn the hosts would literally be like who is this weird binch!

Your top 10 kpop songs of 2017?

In no order but 1. Would U - Red Velvet 2. Let’s Hang Out - SF9 3. Night Rather Than Day - EXID 4. Aloha - Pristin 5. Missing You - BTOB 6. I Loved You - Day6 7. Teenager - Got7 8. Habit - Seventeen 9. As If It’s Your Last - Blackpink 10. You, Clouds, Rain - Heize

Would you rather live in a huge mansion or a compact studio house?  

Im a real messy binch so definitely compact studio

Tell me a fun childhood story (I’ll start! One time an aunt gave me money to buy ‘papas’ (potatoes) at the grocery store so bc I’m obedient af I went and asked the counter lady how many of em could I buy with the money I had so she went ‘uhh, not many tbh’ so i ended up getting like two and when I returned to my aunt’s house she laughed her ass off and said: I meant ‘papas fritas’ (potato chips) Not those! - and uh yeah this is funnier in Spanish but it proves that I’m such an innocent angel I mean wow)

ok so I spent a lot of time at my aunt Lori’s house when I was a kid (like summers, and after school) and my cousin was the BUG queen so she hand made leashes for her pet toads (that she caught) and we walked them around on leashes for like a week but I was always so afraid of them and also hurting them so I WAS NOT ABOUT THAT ahahaha dumb story but it makes me laugh alsoalsoalsdo they had this bench swing in their back yard and my cousin my sister and I would swing on it together for hours at a time and one time we were swinging real hard (REAL HARD) and the links?? or whatever that held it to the ceiling it was hanging from snapped and the three of us of us flew off of it and we all collectively blacked out??? it was so weird but I woke up to my cousin stuggling to get me off of her and then there lays my sister underneath the bench just blacked out chilling (she was fine) then my aunt came running out cause she had just heard the loudest crash ahsdfasdf not long after my uncle put stronger links on it and that bench is still there! From time to time when the three of us get together this story gets brought up its still the most hilarious thing ( ALSO CLOUD YOU ARE SO PURE I LOVE)

If you were offered to start a band, would you accept?

yeah I love music so much why not! not sure I would be able to contribute much  lmao

Mir’s Questions!

If you could travel anywhere, but were completely by yourself, where would you go?

hmmmmm do you mean like I wouldn't be visiting anyone and just traveling alone?? or like going someplace where I know no one?? ok cause for the first I would book it straight to az TO SEE YOU MIR!! AND SISTER!! but for the second I would love to go to Japan (my cousin lives there tho so that also doesn't technically count lmao)

What inspires you?

Music, books, and tv shows! Also really well written characters or just interesting people I guess! but on like a ??spiritual?? level my mom?? she's just that binch you know ( like seriously Ive never met anyone kinder or more driven and hard working in my life she's wild)

How many pets would you have in your ideal future? Any specific names or types in mind?

47 KITS, no realistically I want 2 kittos and they will be named Bellamy and Murphy cause I got too also lowkey want to name a cat rami or Elliot or also kaz or Inej damn all the good names wow. Also the name Calloway is my fav name of all time and I WANT SOMETHING WITH THIS NAME

What are you opinions on fedoras

um eww?? what other opinions are there?? what is this question mir I'm???? but like ngl when worn in a none cringe manner then can look nice!

how many spoons can you balance on your face at once (picture or video proof preferred (i’m trying to get someone to do it pls anyone))

girl I've done my time (lowkey did you put this on her cause I told you about my gravy spoon today???)

What is your favorite type of tree?

I like Birch trees!

If you could convince one person to like kpop who would you convert?

damn MY MOM cause then she might listen to something other than bruno mars once in a while

What are three things you are normally associated with and/or what are three things you want to be associated with?

art, sleeping, reading and um idk?? tbh??? like maybe not being shitty and being funny??? idk??? like I don't know????

If you were in a kpop group what position would you hold (ie. leader, main vocal, moodmaker, etc) feel free to tag your mutuals and who they would be!

um hm im a moody binch bonch so probably moodmaker?? mir is main dancer cause yes duh ivy is leader cause she's the only sane one kennedy I feel would be a great rapper like she got that chic thing going she could do it I feel??? and cloud would be our talent tbh??? nom would be the maknae cause she's small I feel! Jeddy would be my happy virus bud cause she's a fun and funny gal ( I love) Jamie ALSO ONE OF OUR TALENTS wow yes I feel a main vocal here she’d go solo and be singing ballads left and right! JESS WOULD BE THE SWEET MOTHER MEMBER THAT EVERYONE LOVES AND IS JUST THE SOFTEST,,,A SUNSHINE GAL.

If you could have any wild animal as a tame pet what would it be?? (i’m ocelot loyal all the way)

damn idk I'm like horrible at taking care of things (including myself) so like honest id just stick to the kit kats

What is your opinion on mint chocolate chip ice cream? (for maj)

The best ice cream (tho I can't eat it anymore and its very cursed)

Nom’s Questions!

how are you? :D

I’m good Nom thanks for asking!

sad ballads or happy upbeat songs?

Im a ballad ho these days they are honestly all I listen to anymore, but I do love me an good upbeat song I'm just slightly more picky about them!

fave anime movie?

ok tie between Whisper of the Heart and Howl’s Movie Castle, I honestly need to see more that arent Ghibli!

dogs or cats?

Cats! (my dog is practically a cat tbh)

do you keep stuffed animals in your room?

I have one! its a portal companion cube! its not technically an animal BUT I LOVE IT ANYWAY ITS ALL IVE GOT!!!! also if you count tsum tsums I've got a few big hero 6 ones!

someone you miss?

My dad, its been especially hard lately.

describe your phone case?

its like rainbow watercolor! I have a pop socket that matches

favorite lore/myths?

Not technically myth or lore but Beowolf! I've seen the movie at least 40 times and I've read the epic! generally I find northern european mythology/literature to be more interesting than southern. but if we’re going for like ubran myths tbh not really my thing ahahaha.

eardbuds or headphones?

both for different things! but when I first listen to an album I like to listen with my headphones!

can I steal your heart?

you already have ~~~~~~~

favorite thing about your ult bias?

His sensitivity and kind heart! I love a sweet boy! Also I'm really here for Boo’s cheeks!

Jamie’s Questions!

If you could only listen to one song for the rest of your life what would it be and why?

ohhh there are a few songs that I really really love, Heize’s Star is a song that I listen to daily and I feel like I could listen to it for the rest of my life! also September by The Shins! Miracle Aligner by The Last Shadow Puppets also. Idk man I just really love songs with a mystical quality to them.

If you were in a kpop group what would your group be called and what would your fandom name be?

BINCH AND OUR FANDOM NAME WOULD BE BONCHES

If you could acquire mastery over ONE skill instantly, what would you pick and why?

Singing!! its just about the only kind of musical talent I think I’d be any good at! Im a vocalist ho I just want to be like my favessssss

First reaction if you spotted your favorite celebrity on the street?

I would literally hide so fast omg

First reaction if your favorite celebrity followed you on your favorite social media site?

SCREAMING ALL THE LOVE FOR BOO SEUNGKWAN 24/7 and literally only doing art of him and nonstop posting it

Snap your fingers and you get to steal your favorite outfit off of a kpop idol. What outfit do you pick, off of whom, and why?

OK literally all of Soonyoungs airport looks cause damn that boy does not get enough credit for his fashion (he's the best dressed in the group fite me)

If you were to get a painless tattoo that you could remove with the press of a button, what would you get and where would you get it?

umm probably something really pretty? and colorful? I'm not sure what put I like  arm tattoos!

What is your most prized possession?

probably my laptop?? also my collection of sketchbooks!

What’s a YouTube/online challenge that you have always wanted to try?

Im always interested to try those youtube art challenges, I've done the three marker challenge before and the draw this again challenge also!

You get a guarantee that your favorite celebrity will see your social media post but you only get 100 characters. What do you say to them?

I would literally just send my art to them! I feel like it says more than 100 characters can!

You wake up in your dream room. What does it look like?

LITERALLY A LIBRARY AND LIKE NICE AND DARK AND WARM BUT NOT TOO WARM LOTS OF BLANKETS

Kennedy’s Questions!

Make a 10-song playlist for your current mood.

it is here

What vine do you quote the most?

what is that?? who you fighting?

What do you value most in a friend?

I like people who are good listeners! but also people can keep a conversation going! But really tho just genuine kindness and openness.

If you could learn any kpop choreography instantly, what would you learn?

DAMN THIS IS HARD, so many great ones that I love a lot but probably Red Flavor?

If you go to your Tumblr activity page, who does it say is your “number one fan?”

damn Idk them so I'm not gonna like tag them or something lol

What is your ideal clothing style?

I like simple dark clothing that is comfortable.

What is your favorite Snapchat filter?

I really like the ugly ones tbh I don't use them enough

What subject would you like to study, but wouldn’t necessarily want to make a career out of? (for example: I really want to learn about botany!)

psychology, I really love learning about how people work.

Would you rather be constantly half an hour early to everything, or constantly 15 minutes late?

early of course, I hate being late

Would you rather have a single day to spend with your top bias or a week to spend with your number 2 bias?

damn neither??? ahahah no a day with boo would be very blessed!

If you could bring back any disbanded OR inactive group, who would you bring back?

F(X) BINCH I NEED MORE MUSIC

My Questions!

if you had to chose one kpop stage outfit to wear for the rest of your life which would you choose?

favorite music video aesthetic?

Group you are most excited for in 2018?

Recommend me some underrated kpop songs/groups?

If you could join any group other than your bias group who would you join and why?

Favorite soloist? and some song recs?

Childhood Story? (thanks Cloud)

Were you in any fandoms before you got into kpop, if so what were they?

Favorite Comeback/debut of 2017?

astrological sign? Myers Briggs type? Hogwarts House (I'm a Gemini, infp, and Gryffindor)

Random question but what are your favorite names?

Tagging : @s-lay-ing @sambashua @achuu-nice @indiepoptime @yongpal-i (y'all can do mine if you feel like it!) @forgetjunnot @babybyuny @kae-popx @kiheehyunie @jeonwoooo @trbldean130 @howcaniwait @joshhjs @maetaamong and if you’ve already done this you don't have to do it again ahahahaha I feel like everyone has done it already lol

ok thats it do it if you want!

[littlemockingjay]

Alright. I feel like some stuff needs to be written down, as i am mentally a complete mess, and this is definitely not helping with exam season right now. I mean, i just failed one exam this morning, and since it’s an oral one, i got the mark right away. The mark was justified, so i’m not mad about it, i’m just disappointed in myself, but i think there’s just been too much going on in my head recently and this was the explanation as to why everything was mixed up in my head this morning and i suck for that. usually i am able to keep my head cold and separate things but well, seems like not anymore.

So basically, what’s been going on is that during the holidays, i didnt manage to study at all, my grandma’s been sicker and sicker by the day, and even if now, she’s getting better, it was hard to focus on studying knowing this was going on. Now, i’m trying not to think too much about it, but it’s still in my mind, popping up when it shouldnt.

In addition to that, i still dont know what i wanna do later but then again, this has been a recurrent problem in my life since basically the day i needed to decide what to do after high school. Well.

And finally, but not the least problem parasiting my head right now is love stuff. As per usual, because it’s basically the one thing that makes me write here. Else, i would just do something else. So well. Good things first, i’m definitely over ~him~, the guy that i’d have a crush/been in love with for basically 3 years of uni. But then, this guy showed up during my erasmus, and we’re living in the same area now, which was great. However, this guy was/is in a relationship, but it didnt stop him to let things happen. I was not innocent in the process but anyway, after a few months apart, i saw him again and was like ‘YEAH. i just want to be friend with him” no ambiguity, i was genuinely looking forward to having a wonderful friendship with him; except a few weeks later, we went out with his friends and even if technically nothing happened, things got real weirnd and ambiguous. I was really mad the next morning and few days, as i don’t know what happened and yes, i was attracted to him, but definitely not the right thing and choice for me. So this was on my mind, but now i made up my mind and really don’t want to have nothing with him, except a good and healthy friendship, but this will probably require me talking to him, setting the record straight. Which i hate doing btw. So after exam season, this might be to do, but i’m quite anxious about it.

Furthermore, another boy issue appeared. So i’m doing this moot court competition with three other persons, including ‘this’ guy. Which now might be my new crush/love interest/thing i dont know how to describe. THIS IS AWFUL. I mean no, it’s good, he’s so nice and intelligent, and i feel good when i’m beside him, and he’s adorable, and knows a lot of stuff, i could speak for hours with him (i mean, i did already and it was awesome). Anyway, the reason i know him is this moot thingy and at first everything was just purely ‘professional’ if i might say so, but then, ofc, friendship started to grow within the whole team but at some point, it ended up with 3 of us being real close, and another girl being a bit to the side because honestly, even if she has some qualities, team spirit was not one of her forte and she is sometimes really really annoying. Anyways, as the weeks would go by, we just started hanging out more, and there were a few days were we would just be me and -him-, working at his place or hanging out a little bit later, and i started to get attached. Fast forward a few weeks after that, we’re at a party at a friend’s from uni and a few glass later, we end up making out in a bathroom (yup) before i ‘stop’ it (despite not really wanting too) because of me panicking being like ‘omg what’s are we doing, there is still this project blabla i don’t want things to become weird and what shall happen’ and i kept going on and on but in the middle of that we were still kissing and idk, it was good but confusing. then someone knocked on the door saying they were leaving and basically, the party was ending (it was 3 or 4 am by then i believe) and what happened is that he told me i shouldnt be worried about this, that this doesnt mean much and everything will be okay. We actually meet with the others from the team the next day  and everything goes as if nothing happened and at the moment, i felt really happy about it, as i thought this would not have any impact on the project and everything will be turning out fine. After that however, it was the christmas holiday, and we’ve been keeping in touch mainly through our group chat. And then, we all got back to Brussels, all the exams started and i saw him multiple times since, and we’ve being studying together alone at his place for a few exams, and i’ll be honest and say those were great day, just because i spent them with him. Firstly, he’s really helping and then, he is so calm, it just soothes me, and really, just adorable. So basically, that’s how i realized i might have feelings for him; and now basically every day that i dont see him makes me cranky (ok, i might be exagerating but you see the point) . We’ve also had weeeird conversations (sex related and stuff like that) but also really interesting ones (i mean, who quotes Platon just as if it were nothing?° But i’m starting to be afraid. Why would you ask ? Because he is one of the only guy i’ve been into where there is actual chances that 1) he likes me back (not completely sure bout that tho) and 2) if he does, that the thing might lead somewhere. Until now, every guy i had a ‘thing’ with had a girlfriend so basically, nothing could’ve ever really happened. -He-, on the other hand, has basically anything one could ask for and this scares the hell out of me. I mean, not everything’s perfect, i’m really not sure if he might like me back (making out while drunk is surely a hint, but it might have been a mistake for him though, idk), i mean, there has been no other signs since then , or i might just be blind idk, but also, because of the moot, i think we’re both aware it’s going to be too weird to start something or even to talk about it and then, what if something happens again?? i don’t think i’m good enough for him, he’s way smarter than i am, more cultivated, friendlier, idk... and also, he told us (it was not just me at this point) that he ‘gave up on love’ and that it’s not for him and blabla and what the hell am i supposed to do with that. Once the project is over, should i just get us both drunk and make us talk about that ? Idk i’m confused. But i really like him, but this might mean commitment, and i’ve been afraid of commitment my whole life ,so what will happen ? FML seriously, why do such problems always come during exams...  I wish it was easier.

So basically, this has been what’s going on in my head for the last month or so. Reallly nice