#⛅ thoughts

[drunk-on-dk]

i just… have so much written… and just not finalized…. please i will be releasing so much soon i am SO SORRY… i have pending asks that i am waiting to release as well as some playlists writings omfg but i am too excited and still reading through/fixing

[sunflawyer]

imagine; cuddling with your f/o at night.

You found yourself in their arms, nestled comfortably in their embrace with the gentle sway of their breath lightly brushing your hair. You can feel the soothing beats of their heart against your body as you snuggled closer to them, your legs intertwined beneath the blanket.

"Hey," they murmured, "can't sleep?"

You shook your head.

They shifted slightly and planted a soft, gentle kiss on your forehead, "It's okay," their whisper like a melody in your ear, "we can stay up late together."

And so you talked. About everything and anything. You laughed, you cried, you smiled. Until the dawn broke before you two know it. They chuckled and gave you another kiss, this time on the lips.

"Thank you," they said, ever so gently, "that was really nice."

[sky-drgn]

Rereading Chev's route again since it's voiced and found this little line from chapter 3

What do you mean collected?!

Those oddballs are his brothers?? HE DIDN'T COLLECT THEM???

[yibo-wang]

All my life I hated oatmeal so much (I have no idea why—it tasted disgusting as far as I can remember) but like I tried it again like two days ago and it was the most delicious thing I've had ???? (pretty sure my tastebuds have changed a bit) but yeah I've been having oatmeal thrice a day like a child from the great depression

[scaramutuall]

Kaoru growing his hair out like an ugly baby bird getting it's feathers

[matryosika]

Just popping to say I am alive and hanging around the blog! I haven't posted anything because I am working on kinktober stuff, but I am here. Please, don't forget about me 🙏🏼

[thereprisesystem]

fucking. anti.

[dancingastralwitch]

Ngl switching from traditional to digital art had been super refreshing with the endless amount of brushes and the undo button is a godsend but my only downside is not being able to draw on my tablet anytime whenever :(

[u3pxx]

when's it my turn? wouldn't i love love to explore that shore up above? out of the sea wish i could be part of that world ⛅🌊🐚

YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW GLAD I AM THAT I GOT TO DRAW SOME EMAMAYA FOR @onceuponaturnaboutzine!!! i've wanted to draw these two in a high-effort drawing for a long while now and this zine just gave me the perfect opportunity, truly a dream come true! ✨

like this art? it's a print, here! | like what i do? support me on ko-fi!

some initial sketches for what their designs are! just some big inspiration from the disney movie and also splatoon unintentionally, WHEEZES. also, i just thought it'd be hilarious if phoenix was maya's fish sidekick instead

i also originally had a more busy composition but it was just too cluttered and i couldn't find a way to make it work so i decided to just focus on a single moment instead of several!

[zephyricd]

yato has absolute garbage stereopsis after losing his eye--it was not an easy adjustment to make either, especially in the spring of coming of age. he’ll still misjudge where things are in his peripheral ( especially on his right ), sometimes even right in front of him. it’s a difficult handicap to notice as someone who quite skilled with auditory awareness, so yato tends to not turn his head much to compensate for his lack of sight, and this loss of judgment comes off more or less as simply being a bit of a klutz. anyone that knows why he’s impaired to begin with will know he’s struggling--he hates it, in all honesty, but he knows he can’t do anything about it.

additionally, in order to compensate for gauging distance, he tends to estimate based on units of time rather than units of length ( that is, how quickly does his bird fly to the destination or back from it ). once again---as a trained falconer, much like the rest of his family, this does not at all appear to an outsider like anything more than a display of skill. in reality, he just wants to know if something is a little away or a lot away.

[drunk-on-dk]

i’m trying to revamp my blog a bit now that i have a better idea on my theme and im getting there w the mobile but URHJWJJ MY DESKTOP ISNT LOADING CORRECTLY AND IDK IF ITS MY LAPTOP OR WHAT

[larstudy]

⛅ 15.02.2024 // not a great day honestly. It went really really well for most of the day, I was tired but motivated and full of energy and productive! I went to my lectures and studied biochemistry for 4h when I went back home.

But around 6pm my exams results were put online (and yes I don't have either the details of the grade nor the correction). I was expecting to be deceived as I know how my uni works and how unfair the grades can be. But yet, I was expecting to at least not have to retake this subject I worked really hard on. I don't understand any of this. At first I was reaaaally angry and some people were reaaaally really nice to me and it helped a lot (thanksss fr) but now I'm just feeling empty and tired (hey, it's the five stage of grief ig). I try to not listen to my thoughts, to stay busy until they fall silent. It'll pass within a few days but it's hard being a student nowadays ahah

Edit : Fuck I forgot my logs, here they are :

🧾 logs

glasses of water : 💧💧💧💧

hours of study : 4h (+2h of lectures)

hours of sleep : 5h30 (tired zzzzz)

[sky-drgn]

Chevalier hiring various writers to compile short stories in to a book or two (or more) for his Belle so she could read a short story at night before bed.

Because who wants to read a whole ass novel as a bed time story?

[idcallmyselfhuman]

XiaoAether Masterlist 👹⛅

Edit: version 2.0 here

Or, every XiaoAether moment that I can remember (and an attempt to organize them)

Starting this off with the one scene that made us all go "wait a fucking minute" at the very start of the game,

Battle of Osial

Aether's feet were already steadied. Xiao could've let go, or let him fall as gracefully as Mountain Shaper did to that guard (I would've hated him forever) but considering that he insists that being near mortals is such a biiiig no-no, he could have, but he didn't. No, even more, he fucking tightened his hold.

-

Teyvat Food Notes (Sweet Dream, Adeptus' Temptation and Satisfying Salad)

Next! The promotionals during Xiao's release as a playable character. Specifically, Teyvat Food Notes. To celebrate his release, they made an Almond Tofu + Sweet Dream Food blog.

Note: Both google translate and Papago seem to use Mandrill instead of Xiao, so... just know that's who it's talking about.

This is where we learn that Xiao didn't even make "Sweet Dream"; this dish was Aether's thank you gift to him. Xiao's specialty dish is a gift from Aether. I'm- agh. ANYWAY.

We actually also see Sweet Dream in Childe's birthday art. And I'm really sorry to Tartaglia but seeing it stole all his thunder. I could not get over it.

I like to think Aether was so busy making Childe food that he absentmindedly started preparing Almond Tofu in the way he's used to (because of how often Xiao requests it :'> ).

Just when I thought that was it for the Teyvat Food Notes and I could've moved on, I found this in the Adeptus' Temptation food note; the one they made for the first Lantern Rite.

Note: "Fairy/Buddha Jump over the Wall" is apparently an actual Chinese delicacy that the Adeptus' Temptation is based on!

I found this part really cute, especially right now because of the poetry event. Since the beginning, Aether's always known that Xiao was capable of being poetic, it just took them being close and his encouragement for Xiao to actually make a poem.

Lastly, Aether's Satisfying Salad. This isn't connected to the food blog this time (since that one's for Mona), but rather, this and Almond Tofu are the first dishes Aether has ever given Xiao in the game. I included this despite it being pretty minor because in Moonlight Merriment, Smiley Yanxiao actually brings this up again.

Smiley Yanxiao: The boss told me to take care of him, but this guy, let me tell you - he is one tough nut to crack. He usually turns his nose up at everything that isn't Almond Tofu.

Xiao willingly ate something that wasn't Almond Tofu because... because what, it was given to him by a cute blonde traveler? The jury's still out on that one.

-

Lantern Rite 1.3, Baizhu Story Quest

I'm sure we're already familiar with this scene, right?

The very first time Xiao promised Aether that no matter what, as long as he calls his name, he'll be there. Right after that was Moonlight Merriment, where the game literally specifies that Xiao made that promise just for Aether. Way to make your commitment subtle.

Ah, Xiao, you're so easy... Of course, this wouldn't be the last time that Aether calls for him and Xiao arrives immediately. This also happened during Baizhu's story quest to, yet again, the astonishment of everyone around excluding these two. (Xiao's dedication is one of a kind)

Xiao worries over Aether often, despite knowing that they're both formidable in their own right. I also think it's sweet how every time they meet, Xiao's departing words are always a reminder to call for him whenever needed, to the point where there are times that Aether just goes "Yeah, we know." before he can even finish the sentence.

Unfortunately, though, there is one time where Xiao failed to reach Aether when he called him, but only because he physically wasn't able to.

-

Perilous Trail (Interlude)

The only thing that prevented this man from getting to Aether like always was being in a different plane of existence. Romeo and Juliet wish they were this romantic istfg

Aether: Come find us.

Xiao: No.

Yanfei: But Aether's in trouble!

Xiao: How do we meet?

Now where else did someone pull this tactic recently-

...Again, XIAO YOU ARE SO EASY. But anyway, back to the Chasm bc I wasn't quite done with that-

As soon as Yanfei tells Aether that Xiao is awake, Ae comes running. Just full on "stop saying you're fine i'll be the judge of that"

And he looks so angry when Xiao brings up writing a will. augguh they are sooooo- (i would put a reaction pic here if i didn't have an IMAGE LIMIT fuck tumblr bro)

To finish off the Chasm Interlude on a more serious note, this entire conversation was really touching, and I love seeing the progress these two have made over the years. Xiao letting himself open up with Aether's help year by year is one of my favorite things about this game.

-

Teapot and Character Voice Lines + Birthday Letters

For the first and second Lantern Rite, Xiao was still adamant on not even stepping foot in Liyue Harbor, declining every invitation to go there because of how much he disliked being near mortals.

Yet in his teapot voicelines, once you reach a high enough friendship with him, Xiao actually takes the initiative to invite Aether to go to the city, if only to understand him better. Xiao explicitly says that his willingness to go to the harbor was for him.

More About Xiao I: I'm willing to protect you.But don't think about getting close, and stay out of my way, or all that awaits you is regret.

More About Xiao V: It's too late. The connection between us is too strong. Even if you wanted to, it's too late to sever it. Hm? You've never thought to sever it?

About Shenhe: It seems Shenhe places a great deal of trust in you. Well, how could she not. There are few people in the world as kind and good-natured as you.

Shenhe, About Xiao: My first impression of him was that he's not one to smile. After meeting him again more recently, however, he's still as reserved as ever, but… he seems a lot more relaxed now. Maybe he… met someone special.

That line by Shenhe made me happy. Aether's effect on Xiao benefitted not only him, but the people surrounding Xiao as well. We even see that in his birthday letters, where at the most recent one, he follows Ae's advice and goes to spend time with old friends.

They're also all just insanely romantic, I feel like that goes without saying. Every year, I wonder how Genshin would possibly top the one before it that isn't just an explicit confession of undying love.

-

Lantern Rite '23

I'm here to remind you all of a beautiful scene that should never be forgotten for years to come.

Regardless of Genshin trying to be mysterious and making us guess who saved Aether, the fact that they both came rushing over is incredible on its own. They know that Aether isn't a damsel in distress, and Paimon's acting was so on the nose, but they still couldn't allow even the slightest possibility of harm to come to him.

Xiao looking away and talking in circles just to say he really was worried is the funniest fucking thing.

For the Lantern Rite event itself, if you've read this far in, you're probably already familiar. I really wish there wasn't an image limit because I have so many screenshots I want to put in here. If you want a refresher, watch this and start around the 2-hour mark

I wanted to put my own video in the post but you can only put one :/// I'm fist fighting whoever put these limits. 1 video file and 30 images? who are you

BACK TO THE TOPIC

There really isn't much I could say that I haven't already said before. For XiaoAether shippers, this was hoyo spoonfeeding content on a silver spoon. It's Aether and Xiao at their most comfortable with each other, talking and spending time with the people they care about. It's Aether fulfilling his end of the bargain of bailing Xiao out of uncomfortable social situations, because if you haven't noticed throughout all of these examples (or even outside of that), Aether is so perceptive when it comes to the comfort of the people around him.

This was also the event where we find out that for Xiao, the most distinguished guest in his eyes was Aether (Even though Ae thought he was going to say Zhongli..)

I have a lot of love for this event. But since this isn't just a lantern rite post, I'll move on.

-

Waterborne Poetry

The catalyst for this post. The reminder of how lovely this ship is, and how far these two have come.

As we have all learned from Xiangling, Yanfei, Venti and Hu Tao, you only need to mention Aether's name to convince Xiao of whatever it is you're planning. The part where Aether and Team Chongyun were trying to convince him to come with them and touch some fucking grass was really cute.

This event and the previous Lantern Rite also had Aether and Xiao talking privately, only to get interrupted by Paimon/Xiangling (as well as calling them out lmao)

And, of course, the scene that everyone freaked out over,

This. I don't think I'll ever get over this.

The fact that they had Zach voice this- A short, but sweet moment where Aether looks at Xiao from afar and immediately gets inspired, performing a poem where the real meaning is shared only between the two of them...

And Xiao's smile.

An expression that Aether had done so well to bring out.

2023 was the year of XiaoAether. Thank you, Hoyo.

-

Done! I HAVE SO MANY SCREENSHOTS AND I COULDN'T EVEN USE MOST OF THEM ToT. I actually had clips that I edited but Tumblr said no. Good thing there's YouTube.

Another reason as to why I made this was because some shippers said that XiaoAe didn't make sense because it lacked depth and I was so affronted by it that I did all this out of spite (and love for these characters. mostly love.)

[simp4konig]

My personal thing, if you don’t mind me sharing <3, about König, while I know he has the potential to literally kill you without a second thought, I feel like he has a soft spot of children. Parents not so much, but he always spares the children. Now, for the bad behaved children I feel like he would give a scary talking to 👀

Because König feels very strongly about bullying, so if he heard a kid was bullying the other kid? Would come to their immediate rescue and shut the bully down harshly. For him, that’s a mercy, but he promises that if he ever hears word or sees them acting like that again he won’t be as “merciful”. But to the Victims he would console them, but also give them his harsh reality of “you have to be stronger than your enemies” and as much as he wants them to keep their innocence, he doesn’t want them to be weak either. Or worse killed.

But that’s just my little HC 😌

Anon rhis is such a good headcannon???? 🥹🥹 lemme just..,🤏🤌

No i don't mind qt all!!! 😊 If anuthing, im so glad you shqred this with me 🥰💖 bc I felt IMMEDIATELY inspired by this headcannon !!😽✨💖...

... so jere are MY headcannons for YOUR headcannon 🙈🙈⛅🌻💞💕💓✨🌼 Took me a short while to formulate my answer, so srry for the delayed reply 😿 I saw this as soon as you sent me this an i dont want u to tjink i ignored you at all:(</33

König with a soft spot for children headcannons🥺🥺

+ father König drabbles🤭

Word count: ~2022

*If you ignore my VERY angsty depiction of König's childhood, then it's totally pure fluff all around 💖✨🤗

*General headcannons for König

Writinf block is fuckinf AGONY and im in PAIN 😭😭💔💔 give me time to recover and ill powt two fully-fleshed out fanfics sometime soon 🙏🥺

Tag List ♡ @simpforkonig ♡ @abysslovesyou ♡ @puff0o0 ☆ @rustic-guitar-notes ☆ @happy-mushrooms ♡ @reyner-lee

...

König, having been bullied all of his childhood, is FIRMLY against bullying.

To see a little girl/boy being labelled an outcast is oh too familiar to him, and hits far too close to home than it should. Brings back the insecurities, the feeling of being utterly humilated, a permanent reminder of his not fitting in. Literally.

Primary school: bullied for being a beanstalk, for head hitting the door frame, for being abnormally large, a "mutant"; balls hurtled at him in dodgeball, all competing in finding out who can knock out the "freak"; knees kicked from behind and legs buckling from the attack, a stampede of legs stamping on him as he cowered on the floor, helpless, and no one caring to help, teachers observing idly nearby.

Secondary school: nose broken to "fix" his crooked features, his "ugly" face; cast aside in class photos for "ruining the picture"; people of his own age turning their heads in the other way in disgust, avoiding him like the plague.

As if his "ugliness" was contagious, and if anyone was to touch him they'd catch the disease.

Power surpassing his tormentors, yet too powerless to fight back, he endured, yet didn't overcome.

Lasting trauma changed König's own perception of self completely.

It took a long time becoming the cocky and confident commander he presents himself as. To stand up to his full height and embrace himself for who he was and is, to be self-assured, domineering, and boisterous with others irrespective of their rank. The Colonel; a hardened soldier; a strict man of discipline exerting his authority over all, not at all sympathetic towards anyone.

Deep down, he is still that young boy, vulnerable in the center of a circle of so many pointing fingers and sneering faces. All became a collective body of ridiculing smiles, of sing-song laughter, so many that he lost count.

So, personally vowing to NEVER let his future children (or any children) go through the same turmoil, he would intervene whenever he had the chance to.

For instance, perhaps König was speed-walking home one day, dufflebag slung over his shoulder as he rushed to get back to you as soon as possible after being deployed these past weeks, and maybe he was passing by a playground.

Initially focused on the goal at hand, he couldn't help but turn his head, a small smile under his mask as he felt a wave of nostalgia crash over him. Nostalgic of times before he was forced to integrate with callous society.

Smiling at the oblivious children playing together, kicking their chubby little legs on the swings, sliding down a slide and falling, squealing. All giggling with glee, so innocent.

All except one. His eyes would land on a small girl, bawling on the ground, no older than five years old.

Surrounded by three others, all pointing fingers and laughing, the ringleader making fun of the poor thing as his henchmen stomped the remainder of her sandcastle, kicking sand at her. Hands on hip, chest puffed out triumphantly.

Rubbing her puffy eyes, thick pouting lips drooping in an open-mouthed frown, chin quivering as she struggled to contain her broken sobs, she kneeled on the ground, hugging her knees to her chest.

Usually, in these types of situations, people tend to behave in two very different ways when they see something that happened to them happening before their eyes:

"Why should I help them? I went through the same thing, so it's not my problem" or "I should help! They shouldn't have to go through the same thing".

You can probably already guess under which category König falls into.

He was NOT about to actively play a passive role in ignoring the poor blubbering child, to be downright apathetic like the other adults were in their radius. No way.

Still carrying his dufflebag, imagine the horror of the little shitlings*: seeing an imposing giant 2ft+ taller than them, huge body trudging towards their little troupe; cold, icy-blue eyes half-lidded staring into their bulging ones. Glaring.

Little band of clowns would probably actually shitting themselves fr 💀

Not only does König give the brats a stern talking to (all the while they are nodding their heads with jaws on the floor, knees trembling and nearly caving in on themselves), he later makes it his due diligence to track down the parent(s) and scold them too.

"Was wird deinem Gören zu Hause beigebracht? What do you teach your brat? This behaviour is unacceptable. You have set a terrible example, Du verdammter Idiot. How dare you allow this? Bulling is wrong. Scheiße, are you listening to me? Because you should, Dummkopf. You should be ashamed. I am sure ashamed of you. I swear to Gott—"

Cue 1 hours later, he personally grounds them (the child and parents)... 🤐

...And the child goes with it? Even the adults? 😭

I mean, to be honest, I would too, if a 6'10, body-so-broad-that-it-blocked-all-sunlight-and-did-not-fit-in-the-door-frame Colonel, gesticulating wildly, projecting strongly his German-accented voice, cursing in an aggravated amalgamation of furious English and a spiteful spit of German... Yeah, I'd be pissing my pants not even gonna lie 😭

I'd imagine that the parents would be immediately saluting, images of stupidity on their faces, completely dumbfounded to have their parenting challenged and to learn that their "precious little angel(s) that can do no wrong" actually can do wrong. (sorry guys i hate toddlers with a RAGING PASSION... rant over fyi no more of me insulting shitheads🥰)

As for the sweet, weeping girl, he would crouch down to her height, gentle eyes genuine behind his menacing mask. Slowly lifting the fabric, wary of his facial deformities, his scars, he'd do his best to give her a comforting smile, wanting to make her at ease.

She was not put off by his appearance at all. If anything, she maintained eye contact — was curious yes, so with no filter whispered, "You... you have a nice smile, sir. I like your eyes.

"They're—" a loud sniff, wiping her nose with her sleeve "—they're pretty. "

Taken aback, König's eyes widened. Then, in soft whisper:

"Meine Süße, I'm so very sorry about those— those idiots..."

The girl giggled a little, dimples appearing on her tear-stained cheeks.

"And I'm so very sorry, but there will others. Other idiots," he allowed himself to smile, letting out a dry chuckle.

A tentative hand dropping to her round shoulder, squeezing it every so slightly to emphasise his words. "And you have to be strong, Mädchen. You must be strong. This world isn't a good place for angels like you."

Obviously, he didn't sugarcoat the truth. Situations like this would be unavoidable. He would make that clear.

"I do not condone violence, but—" a wink, acknowledging the irony behind his words. "—if you stick your foot out when one of those brats are walking down the corridors, surely nothing will happen, ja?"

Seeing the girl lighten up, smiling brightly, no signs anymore of crying, he ruffled her hair with a toothy grin.

Letting the veil drop down his face, he suddenly fixed his posture and gave an exaggeratedly goofy salute as he turned to head home, satisfied. All the while the girl waved at him energetically, eyes crinkling up in an adolescent's adorable smile.

On another note: I never really gave it much thought before, but... König as a father? 🥺🥺

Your headcannons unlocked a part of my brain that had been locked. 🤭✨ Needed to upgrade my König skill tree before I got to this poin. 🦸🏼‍♀️ Sure has been worth it, though. 🤩

Ever since he was past his teenage years, the thought of a family was something he longed for. Desired.

Maybe it's because he was taught traditional house roles in his European household, or was longing for something that was out of reach, he couldn't tell.

What he was certain about was that it was his biggest wish. His dream.

Deployed in a foreign country, his favourite past-time was fantasizing about his future with a special someone, to have a big family, and to raise his children, giving them everything good he never had, and to shield them from everything bad he had experienced.

Something in being the breadwinner of the house was so masculine to him, and coming home to so many short, out-stretched arms, so excited to be reunited with their papa clinging on to his long legs brought a tear to his eye.

And, once you two officially became a couple, he knew that he wanted to start a family with you at some point. From the moment he met your eyes, intuition assured him that you would be the right one for him.

If you're a [fertile] female, he wants nothing more than to see miniature you and him running around, sweet cherub faces and their chubby cheeks smiling at him, calling him papa, calling you mama.

Seeing your belly swell up with his baby would strangely give him a sense of pride, proud that you would both bring sacred life into the world together, and would practically worship the ground you walk on. He would want to get this right, for everything to be perfect.

He wouldn't allow you to lift a finger despite your protests, catering to your every need, caring for you in any and all ways he could:

Carrying the groceries, 3 carrier bags in each hand, serving you while simultaneously subtly making you swoon, not missing the googly eyes you made at his strength from his peripheral vision;

Doing the bed, making sure to stock up on additional soft pillows and fluffy blankets so you would rest well, removing all stress from your morning routine, and the discomfort of finding a comfortable sleeping position at night;

Insisting you eat balanced meals, preparing nutritious food that had all the nutrients you would need, the sustenance to feed you and develop a healthy baby.

The gore and guts he had witnessed in the battlefield did not compare at all to the sight of blood staining the hospital bed sheet. The look of horror in his eyes as you went into labour, death grip on his hand, knuckles turning white. He'd be hyperventilating, almost feeling the same pain you were going through 😢💔

Not to say that your agony was worth it, but seeing the beautiful blanketed bundle in your arms, you cooing at the little one, made every single horrific moment combined in his life worthwhile.

All the struggles, the hardships, the troubles; all worth it if it meant seeing you with his child.

If you're anything other ([infertile] female, male, non-binary, etc), König would get so emotional when adopting a newborn with you.

He'd be teary-eyed, unable to hide the emotions.

To think that he'd be rescuing a child, giving them a second chance and making it feel so wanted, so loved. To give it all the love he was missing, the feeling forgotten through years of bullying, abuse, and violence, and war.

He would waste no time building the nursery. Painting the walls, building the crib, buying plush blankets, stuffed teddy bears, toys that would be in no way a choking hazard.

His helicopter parent preparations aside, his dream would be to grow old with you, and be surrounded by children, grand-children, and even great-grand-children, sharing stories as the lively atmosphere was bubbling with life, with a family.

Piggy back rides would be a MUST!! 😡 Or, better yet, his infants (taking turns — dunno if three kids at once is very practical 😭) sitting on his shoulders, seeing the world from so high up. Reaching out, and their head in the clouds.

Bouncing them on his knee, like a train conductor going through heavy turbulence, all the while the little ones would be laughing happily, telling him to go faster.

Every single one of his children cuddled up to him; in his lap, over his shoulders, splayed over his legs, clinging to him like a pack of koalas. 🐨

Reading bed time stories, stroking their head, stood in the door way minutes after his children had fallen asleep. Keeping them safe.

A family of his own. To eventually embarrass endearingly, to squish their cheeks, and tickle their sides, play-wrestle and tease by keeping objects out of reach. His extensive research also included horrible dad jokes, which were made hilarious by their poor translations into English.

Wanting to raise his children the way his mother had raised him while she was still around, to give his children the happy childhood he hadn't had, to make school a positive journey into adulthood. He'd teach them to deal with bullies, to stand up for themselves when he never could...

...And, athough he has good intentions, the truth is that with a father like him no snot-nosed brat would ever dare to mess with the Colonel's children ☠️

...

Note: Omg you. csn tell that i got so carried away w/ this😭😭 you know rhat line where König "fantasized" about a family ?yea that was me the entire time wiritng this...💔 God i need to stop daydreamimg excessively ajd return to reality 🥲 ...

...,,jk i wont 🥰💅✨💫 good mental health??😰😰 guurrl we don't know her 💆🏼‍♀️💫✨🧚‍♀️💓

Functioning like a normal human being💔🤮🤮🤮<<<<< Making up vivid scenarios in my head💓💓 😍😍😍

*fyi, shitlings is a loose translation for "gówniaki/gówniarze", an insult you have for children in Polish (similar to the English "shithead"). Do what you will with that new knowledge. The world is your oyster with that one ig 👍

[that-kid-fromtheplayground]

⛅ 𝕋𝕖𝕒𝕞 𝕊𝕥𝕒𝕟 𝕨𝕚𝕥𝕙 𝕒 𝕄𝕠𝕞 𝔽𝕣𝕚𝕖𝕟𝕕⛅ (these are platonic Hcs)

⛅First of all, they didn’t trust you, I mean- you were a 6th grader! and the 6th graders boys tended to bother them.

⛅But then you started offering to babysit them when they were unsupervised.

⛅Kenny loved you the first time he saw you, I mean, look at you! you were a fucking sweetheart! and there you were, babysitting them.

⛅The other boys were more reluctant to accept your pressence, although they were polite with you (not Cartman-)

⛅You always took good care of them, you watched them closely and made sure they eated and didn’t get hurt.

⛅The first time you saw Kenny die was when all of you were in recess time and a swing broke Kenny’s neck with an horrible crack.

⛅When that happened Somehow Someway you managed to cover Stan and Kyle’s eyes with your hands as a maternal instinct.

⛅You didn’t cover up Cartman’s eyes because you knew this scene wasn’t going to have a big impact on him, I mean, he is a manipulative kid who has killed adults.

⛅Kenny’s death lasted 3 days, and after those he was back in bussines.

⛅Sadly, you didn’t remember his death but you seemed to remember that something bad happened between him and the swings, and so, the next time he was near them you took him by the shoulders and pushed to your left side, the one who didn’t face the swings.

⛅That seemed to happen with all of the deaths you saw, because when he came back you seemed to turn protective of him when the group was near the thing that caused his last death.

⛅The one of the boys that worried you the most was Stan, he seemed like a good guy but he always had this depressing actitude.

⛅After some time and reasurance he finally opened up to you, he told you about everything that worried him and you comforted him and tried to give him your best advice and comforting hugs.

⛅You and him established that Sunday night would be the regular day to have a talk about his emotions and worries.

⛅He was so greateful for that.

⛅Your relationship with Kyle was a very good one.

⛅yeah, at first he didn’t talk to you much because he thought you were there to hurt them or mock them.

⛅But Oh! Surprise! You weren’t there to do that, you were there to form a friendship and to look after them just like a mom would do.

⛅He was quickly to gain a part of your heart because he was such a sweetheart towards you once he got enough trust with you.

⛅When all the team met at your house to do the homework you soon noticed how incredibly smart he was, so you turned your atention to help the others with their homework as soon as you finished your own.

⛅That lead to a very cute scene, ‘cause as soon as Kyle noticed how you atended the rest of the boys more than him he couldn’t help but form a little pout with his lips, and so he called your name and told you that he had a problem with something.

⛅You were quick to realice that he didn’t have a problem and just wanted your attention, you laughed at that cute behavior and gave him a hug and a kiss on the forehead telling him that he didn’t need your help, to wich he just sighed defeated.

⛅You gave him a bunch of your atention for the next hour after that scene and Cartman got quite annoyed by that because he wanted your attention aswell.

⛅With Cartman you got along quite well, your relationship with him wasn’t as intimate as with Stan’s or as lovely as Kyle’s but it was a funny one for sure.

⛅Remember that thing that he does with his mum name? Like dragging the las syllabe of her name? Yeah, he deffinetly does that with your name too 😅

⛅You learned to bring a bunch of snacks in your bag, they hapen to calm down Cartman if he’s being a bratty kid.

⛅You definetly will have to step in between Kyle and Cartman sometimes to stop them from killing one another.

⛅Believe it or not, Cartman respects you more than anyone in this world, I mean- have you seen yourself when you protected them of a group of 8th graders???

⛅It’s still a mistery (for you-) why those 8th graders tried to hurt your lil beans.

⛅And YES, he has definetly called you “moma/mommy” (not in a sexual way) sometime... and YES, Kyle is still mocking him for that, when he does, surprisingly Cartman does not get violent, he just blushes in shame and shouts “Well, SHE IS our mom! right?” 

⛅And when he says that “right?” he just looks at you with the most confused and adorable expression ever made and you just can’t say no to him.

⛅And so, since then, they call you mom/momma/mum/mommy 

⛅And, just ‘cause you find that adorable, you call them lil bean/son/my beloved/darling/hun.