#(also ignore how the ending goes ✨positivity✨ out of nowhere it was late and i was tired of typing through my eyelids

[chasing-the-persea]

Imagine Percy having a really rough day. His power, what he’s done, who he’s had to be to do those things, are weighing on him. Frankly, he scares himself. He doesn’t know how any sane person would want him around, much less around kids, especially as a counselor.

He puts on a brave face. Maybe if he looks happy no one will remember there’s a person behind that face who can’t look at himself in the mirror.

He doesn’t know how it happened; maybe he agreed to it when he was lost in his mind, putting on the “chill older counselor” face everyone expects, but he finds himself in the sand volleyball pit on the team of campers from the less populated cabins. The Demeter and Hermes cabin teamed up on the other side.

The game itself is a fog to Percy. The only breaks in his gloom come in the form of reminders: that’s only a volleyball (images of a giant hurling rocks at him flash in front of his eyes). they’re calling the ball (the sound of campers crying out for help in countless battles echo in his head). that’s just sand (the phantom touch of Gaia’s earth brush his legs)

Before he knows it his team is cheering: they won. He doesn’t know how–or if–he contributed any. He chastises himself. A good leader wouldn’t let themselves be distracted. Wouldn’t…his shoes are gone.

He could’ve swore they were right there? If he wasn’t so caught up with himself he would know where he put his shoes, that’s so stupid what would have happened if he was in battle and he got distracted, then it’d be on his head if another camper got killed again because of him, he shouldn’t have even played what was he thinking—

A Hermes kid was holding them up, taunting him, retaliating for their loss. He took one step towards them and they took two steps away. Their face was…playful? This was a prank. They’re pranking him. Don’t they know what he’s done, why their cabin is so empty now?

He took another step. This time the kid let out a excited laugh and ran a few feet away. This was a game. For fun. The kid knows but doesn’t care. They just want to have fun with an older counselor. camper. cousin. whatever the relation, they genuinely just want to mess with him.

But why would they—unless. Unless they aren’t afraid of him.

They see him as a leader, and like any other rotten kid, they want to tease whoever’s in charge. The kid is just being a kid, doing kid things. Like stealing someone's shoes and knowing they won't be hurt because of it. Because they believe Percy is good.

He tries to ignore the similarities on the kids face to one he knew so well, one he thought was good when he was the kids age.

I'm not Luke, he reminded himself. A tiny whisper in a corner of his mind hissed how are you any different?

He looked at the kid again, who was still holding out the shoes, attempting to lure him into a chase. The kid took a couple more steps away, grinning wildly as Percy’s face set in determination.

I’m going to be the person Luke needed, and the one he never was for me. We deserve better.

He sprinted after the Hermes kid, laughing lighter than he had in months.

[dreambigdreamz]

When you get this you have to answer with 5 things u like about yourself, publicly. Then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (non-negotiable, positivity is cool)✨💝

Thank you, qween <3

1. My optimism. Call it what you will, optimism or ignorance. But when I'm stuck in a demanding situation, I usually don't freak out or panic. Sure, I'll probably be quieter than usual and just fret about it silently on the inside depending on the size of the problem but I most likely will try to forget it until I'm mentally prepared to tackle it. I think it's at least better than worrying constantly worried over everything that goes wrong in life. I'm also happy that I've began to show that optimism too, when my mother was being uncertain about us having to use solar panels instead of electricity. I told her, "Don't worry, mom. The thing with our family is, whenever we get into some trouble, I have recognized a pattern that we almost always end up better than previous circumstances anyways." Which was true, and it made me so happy that she is still quoting that to others (yes, she likes to show me off 🤧)

2. My willingness. Connecting with the previous point, I always want to give my best every time I do something. If I can't, then I mostly end up despairing over the failure, and sometimes even lose will to keep on trying. Of late, I have come to understand failing once doesn't mean your life is a failure, but failing to try again does. I think I'm just determined to prove myself to others (a thirst, if you will), especially my mom like ^^^ those little rewards of knowing I made my family proud is one of the motivations that fuels me forth to give my best. I also like giving everything a try, except those rare times I turn cowardly, because what I fear most is regret. Is that included in the seven sins? It'd probably be my fatal flaw though. Like Aslan said, "To ask what would have happened, child? No, nobody is ever told that." And what I don't know, I desire to know most. I'm basically open-minded to everything except secrecy. Or like, oblivion? Wait, no, just the fact that you know something's there but you don't know what? Yeah, I hate that feeling.

3. My love. I have an abundance for that, rest assured. Even to total strangers across the world, I have this longing to share and send the care and love all the way to them. Sure, no big deal. Almost everyone I've met online are sweet angels who are very generous with their time and kindness for others. But something I admire more is self-love. This is very rare to witness as most people don't like to express it much, for fear of coming off as a selfish, conceited person. Most probably. And in truth, there really is such a thin line between self-love and selfishness that it's almost hard to distinguish the two. But there are a few I've come across, who I heartily adore for that matter (the asker being included in that category 💞). And I also like to think the same for myself too. I would never degrade myself or could ever hate myself for how I look and sound and think. I just love everything about me so much, and appreciate that I have become a better person with each passing year. For sure, I'd still think I'm not good enough — I'm nowhere near being good enough. But here comes in my optimism and willingness to ensure I keep taking the journey with enthusiasm. Besides, ever since I was born, I have been given everything by my parents who laid their lives for me, and taught me wisely to never succumb to intimidation; be it wealth, knowledge or other. They taught me never to fully become someone's slave, but be an eager student taking lessons from those better than myself. But never, ever, think I won't be able to stand shoulder-to-shoulder with them. And I love that. I love the idea of being in love, I love the idea of loving another, and I love myself.

4. My image. As already said, I love how I look. I also love how I am perceived. It's taken a long way for me to be where I am right now, and I can't help but be proud of that. Many people don't consider me pretty (and I wouldn't either, except when I'm alone in my room and being crazy), but I think I look approachable. Meaning, I don't look off-putting but instead, a friendly open person. Furthermore, I am widely known at school as a hard-working student, and an outstanding one. Since I go to a prep school which is private, word spreads around quick. One of my goals in life is to one day hear from my brother, that one of his teachers asked him, "Hey, are you Snow's little brother?" I've heard my teachers ask this to a friend, and I realized what was going on. My friend has sisters who were outstanding in their own time, and are now traveling abroad to study overseas. They made themselves known in their society, and are easily associated with a good name wherever they go. That's what I would like to accomplish too, to make a name for myself and leave an image. So yeah. I love how I look. But I also love how I am perceived.

5. My thoughts. Nothing. Just that. I can't delve into detail or I might give embarrassing examples and I will never be able to live through it. But yeet.