#(but my wife can't do that while she's still working this job and our other partner isn't here)

[kirby-the-gorb]

[drghostwrite]

Dark Nights

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x preg!wife!reader

Summary:

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"You can't ask that of her!" Natasha yelled across the table. You were both called into a conference room with Fury and agent Hill, they were talking about a last-minute mission though your wife was concerned about your approaching due date. While they argued and Maria played referee you found yourself staring out the window of the large conference room a million things running through your mind, one hand running along your bump as your baby kicked.

"And who are you to decide that?" Nick Fury shot back at the other agent.

"I'm her wife." Nat responded.

"Oh because that's stopped other agents before." He responded

"Fury you know I respect you but that's my wife, the mother of my child, our unborn child that in case you haven't noticed she's carrying."

"Okay, okay, before this goes any farther... How about we ask Y/N, she is sitting right here." Maria finally spoke up, motioning to your distracted form.

"Y/N?" you're wife gently called.

You rubbed a hand over your eyes trying to clear your head taking in a gasp before refocusing your eyes on them, "If and I mean IF I were to agree to this what all would it entail?"

"Well that..."

"No I want full disclosure, no more confidentiality and clearance levels, if I'm doing this and potentially putting my life and the life of my unborn child on the line I need to know everything." Nat sat next to you and turned to Fury.

"We had a situation a few years back, an agency that's been working against SHEILD, they used to be a part of Hydra but they reformed, they have recruited agaents and took over one of our smaller compounds, though it's to be evacuated this week to keep their identities a secret, we need someone to get in ther."

"That's where I asked why they picked you with being on leave."

"My main concern isn't getting you in, it's the systems on the inside, all the coders did was build into the SHEILD mainframe, they have no access to us but they have similar systems so I need someone that's a trained agent, and good with the computers, it would be in and out, need to know basis, all I need you to do is get in, crash their systems and get out."

"So that's where I come in?"

"Exactly."

"Okay, in and out, only on the condition that you do have agents on site and Natasha is in the command center, I want her in my ear at all times."

"Whatever gets you onboard, let's get you briefed and prepped for the field." Fury said.

---time jump---

You turned down the hallway, dimly lit by soft baseboard lights, you turned another corner but quickly pushed back when you saw two guards stationed outside the control room, any other time you would've just incapacitated them both but being 36 weeks pregnant wasn't helping you much.

"Natasha?"

"Y-Y/N? I'm r-r-ri-ght here what'sss go-going on-n?" The intercoms were breaking up which meant your job was going to get that much harder. "Two guards outside the command room, change of plans."

"Detka please, be careful."

"Will do, intercoms are getting scratchy, if this is it till I get out of here, I love you Natasha."

You made the decision that if you couldn't get in the control room you could still shut it down remotely, so you backtracked and took some different turns stumbling upon the old director's office, silently patting yourself on the back and opening the door.

You walked over to the desk, and brushed your hand along the command bar that's built into the desk, the hovering screens flashed to life. You swiped moving the screens around, they asked for your password and thanked Tony Stark for giving you a built in back door, when Ultron took over he built a back pathway that allowed you access but nothing was associated to you as a person so you had access to the entire system without anyones knowledge. You quickly started working pulling up the mainframe and started untagling the mess the rebellion had created, you were so close to unraveling the whole thing when you felt a sharp pain running through your abdomen.

You stopped in your tracks waiting to see if it was just your imagination, but then another one, this time catching you off guard causing you to keel over using the desk for support. "shit, shit, shit... this can't be happening." you said worry flooding your features, you tried calming yourself but you knew what this could mean.

"Natasha?" You called over the intercoms, but no response so you tried again but you realized there was no signal, you were alone and going into labor. You thought about backtracking and alerting them but as you went to exit the office you heard footsteps, quickly swiping the screens dark again you watched as the guards walked by standing next to the door frozen, you felt the warm liquid running down your legs and realized that this was it, the night just went from dangerous to deadly if you didn't get help quickly. Your water just broke and you were by yourself in an enemy compound with no way to communicate with anyone outside.

You cringed as another contraction took over your body pressing a hand tightly under your swollen bump, "Oh baby not now, please not now." you brought the screens back up typing rapidly, taking the mainframe down meant potentially setting off a bunch of alarms which meant that you would be exposing yourself in the height of labor.

"Okay wait if this is built into the SHEILD mainframe I can get ahold of your other mommy...Oh God..." Another contraction took over, you slid to the floor, pulling out your phone you connected it to the computer sending an "SOS" to Nat hoping that she would get it in time.

"Okay baby, this is me and you until we get help, so I'm gonna need you to slow down a little bit." you ran a hand over your bump closing your eyes and leaning against the strong desk.

You moved quickly into the adjoining room moving into the corner, grimacing at the pain of your baby trying to make it's way into the world, "God you're as impatient as your mother...Nnngghh."

You heard the door to the office start to open and held your breath, hearing light footsteps, and saw as a light scanned the room.

"Y/N... detka are you in here?" you heard a whispering voice call out.

"Natasha?" you called, you listened as hurried footsteps moved towards you, the door swung open revealing your wife. As she looked in on you her worst fears coming true, she quickly got down in front of you, running a hand soothingly along your thigh.

"Y/N what's going on?"

"It-it's the baby...Nnghh, Natasha our baby is coming," you said and tears started to fall, you were a trained agent one of the best to ever step foot in SHIELD, you were an Avenger a super soldier, but in this moment you were scared out of your mind.

"Um, okay baby it's okay."

"M-my water broke...we need to get out of here"

"Okay, Y/N it'll all be okay, Maria is outside getting a hold of Steve she's calling in a rescue team, you know Bucky will be breaking down that door as soon as he finds out."

"I-I cannghh..." you gripped her hand throwing your head back gritting through a contraction, "I got you baby, just breathe."

"Nat this is happening now."

"Okay, then let's do this." she said as you slowly shook your head agreeing with her.

"Okay, my pants you gotta help me." you said pushing at the waistband, she quickly hooked her fingers in your pants pulling them off along with your panties and laying them to the side.

"Y/N, I can see it... I can see the head."

"Whaa- no I-I no this wasn't supposed to happen like this... Nat I can't do this... Hhahh, I can't do this."

"Y/N Romanoff yes you can, you are my wife, one of the strongest people I know I've never once seen you back down from a challenge or a threat and you protect the ones you love so fiercely, I never once doubted starting a family with you, so if anyone knows, I do. I know that you can do this."

"Woouuu...Nnghh." you tried but these contractions were getting closer and closer, "I-I need to push."

"Okay, follow your body." you pushed, your nails digging into Natasha's shoulder as she was bent down in between your legs, she was reassuring you while you fought through a few more contractions.

"Okay Y/N head is out, just a couple more and we meet our baby." you tried to answer but the contractions were too close, you pushed a couple more times before your wife was holding your newborn in her arms.

"It's a girl, we have a baby girl." you listened as her cries filled the room, you started feeling lightheaded.

"Natasha I don't feel so good."

"Y/N, I-Y/N..." she said noticing the blood, you were bleeding fast and she realized that you needed to get out of there asap.

She heard as the door to the office crashed in, "Y/N! Natasha!" you heard Bucky yell out, he moved around the room and stopped outside the door hearing your newborn daughter's cries, he opened it coming in.

"Is that?"

"Yes." Natasha said tears in her eyes, and he quickly realized how dire the situation was.

"Bucky, she, the blood..."

"Okay let's go I got her." He quickly picked you up making sure you were covered and started out the door. Natasha saw the screens still live and hit the execute button, running our behind Bucky with your baby in her arms.

46 hours later and the mission had been executed, you were finally awake and safely at your home holding your baby girl, Natasha was next to you holding you both in her arms, you had minor hemorrhaging after the birth but luckily had some of the best doctors around, meaning you made it out almost completely unscathed and with a perfectly healthy baby girl. Though you and Nat quickly agreed that next time there would be no last-minute missions so close to your due date.

[aperrywilliams]

They Will Never (Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader)

(Not my gif. Credits to the creator!)

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Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Summary: Spencer's girlfriend is jealous. During the Christmas party at their daughter's school, the other moms don’t stop hitting on him.

Word Count: 3.5k

Warnings: 18+; Minor DNI. Suggestive and dirty talk. Smut (fade to black) at the end of the fic. If I forgot something, let me know.

A/N: I’m back!!!! This past months have been a rollercoaster in many ways. Well, talking about this fic, it could be a sequel from "That Wicked Love" multipart I wrote a while ago. Nonetheless, it could be read as a stand-alone.

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I never thought it would be easy. When I discovered that I was pregnant and Spencer wasn't going to support me, I was sure the world had ended.

There were weeks of thinking over and over again about what I would do with my life. Then I decided I would have Olivia, and that's it.

I don't regret my decision. Liv is my little girl, and I love her with all my heart, but motherhood is hard.

Since Olivia was born, my life has mostly revolved around her. Being a mother is a full-time job. But I have been managing the best I could. I continued working after she was born, and with time, some of my personal life returned too.

However, the stability of our little family was broken when a bloody bastard kidnapped my little girl two years ago. She was four back then.

That wasn't enough, though.

What were the chances of Spencer working on my daughter's kidnapping case?

I forgot to mention that I never told him I would continue my pregnancy, so it was a surprise for him to see me and know that he had indeed been a father.

Fortunately, Spencer’s team recovered Olivia and three more kids kidnapped by the same guy.

What followed was a rollercoaster of events and emotions. Spencer wanted to be in Liv’s life, and although I swore never to talk to him again, I couldn't deny my daughter of her father.

He showed regret and swore that leaving me alone while pregnant was the worst thing he had done in his life. He looked genuinely sorry, and he wanted to make it up to Olivia.

Against the odds, I let him.

He became the best dad for my girl. Since then, he has been for her at every step.

The problem? Having him close awoke those feelings I thought were buried the day he left.

I tried to ignore it. I really tried. Even if he never did something to make me uncomfortable in our co-parenting roles, I did feel off with it.

I still loved him. And months after, Spencer confessed that he still loved me too.

Would it be a bad idea? Maybe. But I left my heart to speak louder than my brain. That's why we have been dating for the past three months.

So you can guess how odd it is having your daughter’s dad as a boyfriend. Some people think we are married or living together when we are not. Others believe we are just co-parenting and don’t have a relationship.

Usually, I don't care what people think. But right now I wish things between us were clearer to the world, specifically for the moms who had Spencer cornered in the venue of this year’s school Christmas party.

Am I jealous? Yeah. But how could I not be? Spencer is the epitome of the young-hot dad, caring and lovely. And polite. Very very polite. So much so that even if he had noticed their advances, he hadn’t said anything. Maybe he likes that.

This has me overthinking, and I wouldn't say I like it because it brings all kinds of insecurity thoughts to my mind.

Right now, for example, instead of going to interrupt this obscene flirtation, I'm walking to the opposite side to check if Olivia needs anything. I can't bring myself to do something different.

It didn't help to hear part of their conversation when I was passing by a while ago.

“Your wife is a lucky girl, then,” Kimberly chimed, patting Spencer’s forearm.

“My what?” the man asked, confused.

“Your wife? Olivia's mom?” Kim explains, tilting her head. Then Spencer realizes she’s talking about me.

“Oh! No, actually, we are not married,” he corrected. God, Kimberly’s eyes go wide as if she found a gold mine. The rest of the moms there reacted in the same way.

I have nothing against that fact, but with them knowing it? It's like a door was opened. A door to the shameless coquetry, and I hate it.

I knew Spencer wouldn’t be consciously flirting with them, but seeing him laugh at their jokes and don’t even flinch when one of them gripped his forearm not only made me see red.

It was even worst: it made me self-conscious.

I know it's an irrational feeling. Of course I know there are people better than me in many things. I wouldn't pretend to be a superwoman or something close to that. But since Olivia started preschool, I have been feeling less than the other moms. At first, it was because I was raising her alone and working simultaneously. I couldn't make it to every school event or whatever they planned during the year. Now, also, there is the fact that it’s Spencer who can fulfill that role, and I still can’t. He is the cool dad with a cool job. And there are cool moms with cool jobs too, who he’s talking to at this precise moment.

Doing the math, it doesn't look like I could be up to that kind of expectation.

For the rest of the evening, I avoided being close to Spencer and the other moms. Instead, I focused on the kids and that Olivia could have fun at the party. After all, it was the primary purpose of this activity.

The ride home was mostly silent. I tried to concentrate on driving and not look at Spencer from the corner of my eye. Liv was fast asleep in the back seat.

The streets were filled with snow, and you could see the Christmas lights on the windows of each building we passed. The ambient was clearly festive, but I didn't feel or look that way.

Maybe Spencer felt something was off, but I guess he didn't want to bring it up in the car. He only made some random comments about the party, and for all of them, he got from me a curt hum in response.

When I parked, he took hold of a sleepy Olivia in his arms and helped me upstairs.

It was a well-known routine since we told Liv that Spencer was her dad, and she warmed up to him. Every time we got to my apartment after an afternoon together, he carried our daughter to her room and got her ready for bed. The little girl would open her eyes and demand a bed story from her dad.

Spencer loves reading to her, even if he knows most of the stories by heart. That's one of the many things they share as father and daughter, and I try to give them the space to do that. That's why this time, like others, I headed to the kitchen to make myself some tea.

With a mug in hand, and after switching on the Christmas tree lights, I plopped on the couch. I didn't notice before how much my feet hurt. What can I say? The afternoon’s overthinking even dimmed my body aching.

Great, now I can add ‘old and wasted’ to my self-deprecation list.

I let my eyes be entertained by the colored lights, wondering if I was being overdramatic. My thoughts were interrupted by Spencer sitting beside me.

“I couldn't finish the story, and she had already fallen asleep,” he announced, lifting my legs so they could rest on his lap. Thoughtlessly, he started rubbing my feet.

Silence took over the room. I tried to concentrate on the pleasant feeling of his hands on my aching feet, but my face sure didn't hide my sour mood.

“What's wrong?” Spencer asked cautiously, inspecting my features. I tried to play ignorant.

“Uh? What do you mean?” I lied. Spencer frowned.

“You are too quiet. You didn't say anything during the car ride, and I could tell you avoided me most of this afternoon,” he recounted.

Shit. Obviously, he noticed.

“I’m just tired,” I lied again. I didn't want to explain what was bothering me. It was silly, and I felt stupid for it. He was about to say something to question my answer, but I didn't let him.

“Maybe you should go home. I think it's better I go to bed,” I pointed, detaching my feet off his lap and sitting straight on the couch. By all means, I avoided making eye contact because I knew he would realize what I was trying to do.

During the past months, he had spent the night at mine before, but it wasn’t a habitual thing. We decided to take it slow, and neither he nor I had put pressure on that matter.

Spencer’s frown deepened, nonetheless.

“Okay. I’ll go,” he announced. “But first you need to tell me what is bothering you. I don’t bite the ‘tired’ thing,” he declared, shifting his posture on the couch to have a better look of me.

“Nothing is wrong,” I repeated, but my voice sounded even less convincing than before. The man hummed, thinking about what to say first.

“Did you know that in the US the 95% of people who are asked for a confirmation to a statement actually lie about it?” He commented. I huffed, already feeling trapped.

“Great. Now is where your 187 is displayed,” I said under my breath. It was a thought that wasn’t meant to be said at loud. But it slipped.

Spencer tilted his head.

“Hey! Now I’m worried. What happened? What did I do?” he asked in a high pitch tone, scooting to my side. I shook my head, sighing.

Maybe it was better to get clean and tell him everything.

“You - you didn't do anything. I mean, yeah. You were there, all cute and sexy. It's your fault! And they? They were all over you, gawking at you as someone looks at their prey!” I grumbled.

“They?” Spencer asked in confusion.

“The other moms, Spencer! Now you will tell me you didn't notice?” I scoffed, folding my arms over my chest and placing some distance between us on the couch.

“You mean at the party? No way. That not happened,” he refuted, shooking his head.

The bastard was denying the most obvious thing! That made anger fill my body, and I had to stand and start pacing. It was that or scream at the man.

At the loss of words, Spencer stood too, following my pace with his gaze.

I knew he could see the fuming escaping from my ears, but I didn't care.

He wanted to say something, but he didn't know how to start. I bet my pacing in the room wasn’t helping him.

“(Y/N)...” he mumbled softly to catch my attention. I turned to see him. His confused look only fueled my irritation.

“Fuck, Spencer! How can you be so clueless? They were hitting on you! God, if it were up to them, you'd already be tied to their bed frame,” I shouted, hands waving in the air to accentuate my point.

Spencer’s eyes widened.

“What? That's not true. They were being nice. That's all,” Spencer defended. Sure, he has to be oblivious right now. I would have punched him to make him realize the truth.

“Nice, uh? I didn't know nice meant touching the guy in front of the whole people every chance they got. Or are you going to deny they did that, uh, genius?” I sneered now with my hands on my hips. My blood was boiling inside as I remembered the scene.

Spencer cleared his throat. He was recalling those details, and they were hitting him now. Cautiously he took a step forward, hands trying to reach mine.

“Hey, don’t get upset. I - I didn't see that. I’m sorry,” he said, stepping in front of me and prying my arms from their position on my hips. His fingers traced delicate patterns on the back of my palms.

“I should have seen it. I didn't think it was something like that. You know I’m pretty stupid in that kind of thing. I’m really sorry,” he apologized.

I really wanted to stay angry, but seeing those puppy dog ​​eyes, looking intently at me made it difficult.

Argh! Why just one look from him it's all that it takes to feel my knees go weak?

“Don't look at me like that!” I protested.

“Like what?” He asked, kind of amused by the reaction he provoked in me.

“Like you were an innocent pigeon. All men are the same, honestly,” I complained, leaving the grasp of his hands. A new rush of anger came quickly. Spencer pursed his lips; he could tell the reason why I was upset wasn’t just the moms flirting with him.

Before I could turn and walk away, Spencer stopped me grabbing my hand and squeezing it gently so I could look at him.

“Please, don’t go. I’m sorry I didn't notice. But you know why I didn't? Because they are not you,” he declared, intertwining our fingers and grasping our hands with his free one. I looked at him, with some treacherous tears fighting to come out.

He continued.

“They are not you. You are the only one that can get my attention that way,” he declared, bringing my hand to his lips to kiss my knuckles.

“I’m not that special, you know?” I mumbled, pursing my lips to stop the tears.

There it was. The intrusive thought in my mind replayed over and over since it hit me this afternoon.

Spencer narrowed his eyes, realizing there was more than jealousy because of him.

“Don’t say that. Of course you are that special, and much more!” He rebutted, and I chuckled bitterly.

“Am I? I mean, why would you be happy with me when you can get a successful well-manicured super mom like them?” I pointed.

“What are you talking about? What is that thing about super moms?” he asked, now taking hold of both my hands.

I sighed. It was something that was hard to explain, even to me. I left the grasp of his hands, running mine through my hair, collecting my thoughts.

“Look. I don't expect you can fully understand it. Honestly, I think I can’t understand it either. It's just - I don’t know. Sometimes I think I’m not doing enough. I’m not a successful businesswoman with a six-year-old daughter, a nice car, all dolled up, perfect makeup, and baking cupcakes for the whole school, like Kimberly, you know?” I shrugged, feeling small and vulnerable.

Of all that people, I chose to compare myself with Kimberly Garland. The incarnation of a super mom. She was known as a successful CEO at a technological company. Mom of three and recently divorced. She always shows up to school activities, no matter what. And not only that, she actively participates, whether cooking, taking care of the ornaments and decorations, or whatever it needed.

How could you compete to that?

“And do you think that no being like her is a bad thing?” Spencer asked me.

Did I believe that? Perhaps I did.

“Maybe it is. Don’t you think Liv deserves a mom like that? Or you a girlfriend like that? I saw you talking to her today, and I couldn't stop thinking she could offer more than I could.”

It hurt to say those words out loud, but they were the ones plaguing my thoughts at the time.

Spencer's face softened. Great, now I'm sure he felt pity for me.

“She can’t. Kimberly or whoever you’re comparing to. You're an excellent mom, (Y/N). And the best girlfriend I can ask for," Spencer stated now strocking my cheek.

I felt silly making a fuss but the insecurities were there. I couldn't help it. The embarrasment made me downcast my gaze to the floor.

“My sweet girl. Look at me, please," he asked, tilting my chin up. I did so, my cheeks turning red under his gaze.

“Olivia is a lucky little girl, you know? She has the best mom in the world. A mom who loves her and would do whatever it takes so she can be happy and safe. Who cares if you can’t be in all those school activities? Not her, because she knows you love her. It doesn't matter if you are not a company CEO. You have your job, and thanks to that our daughter has had everything she needs. You took care of her alone in her first years. On top of that, you have always sought her well-being and happiness. You let me be in her life even after I hurt you years ago. I will always be grateful that you did,” he said, pulling a strand of hair behind my ear.

“She deserves having her father around,” I pointed. It was a decision that I made when we spoke again after Olivia’s kidnapping. Although my hurt feelings, I couldn't deny my daughter of her father if he genuinely wanted to be in her life. Our problems as adults didn't have to be a problem for her.

“And she deserves the wonderful mom she has,” Spencer declared, kissing my forehead. I blushed at the compliment.

“Now, regarding this relationship,” he began pointing between the two of us. “You have nothing to worry about. They don't stand a chance, and you know why? Because they don't even compare to the most beautiful, smart and brave person I've ever met. Who owns a small bookstore downtown, and my heart. The woman I fell in love with the moment I saw her—the mother of my child. Who gave this idiot a chance to be in her life again even when he didn't deserve it. They are not you, my sweet girl. They will never be, and that's why I could never even look at them the way I look at you.“

Fuck Spencer Reid and his ability with words.

“You mean it?” I asked tentatively. Still unsure if he was being serious.

“Of course I mean it. I’m here for the long run, and I hope someday - sooner or later - we can take the next step. I want everything with you, (Y/N), but I’ll go at your pace. I promise.”

I couldn't help the giggles that left my lips.

Could love make you this way? I felt lighter and confident. Spencer's words made me see that I have no reason to sulk that way.

“Keep talking like that, and you'll get the world, Dr. Reid," I stated, now wrapping my arms around his neck. He chuckled.

“I don't need to get it. I already have it with you,” he said, giving a peck to my nose.

"You're a sap," I teased.

"And you love it,” he added, leaning down to kiss me. I happily obliged and kissed him back, tightening my grasp on his neck. His hands planted on my hips to keep me steady.

The kiss deepened, and only we parted when the need for air was too much.

He looked at me with a devilish smirk on his face.

“You know?” he started, kissing my cheek and then my jaw. “There is only one bedframe I would rather be tied to right now. And there is only one person I wish would do indescribable things to me as I’m tied up at her mercy,” he whispered in my ear, and immediately, I felt shivers down my spine.

“Spencer, don’t. That's not helping,” I mumbled with my eyes fluttering shut.

“Isn’t it? Why? Are you thinking about it right now?” He teased. The bastard knew what he was doing. “You would like to see me all tied up, waiting for my sweet girl to do what she wants? Would you like to be in control and show those moms who own me?” he asked, as his lips left traces of kisses on my neck. His hot breath was hitting on my skin and making my desire grow.

“Spencer,” I moaned, lost in his words and eager for his touch.

"Tell me what you want. I'll give you anything," he whispered in my ear, hands running down my sides, giving me goosebumps.

“You. I want you.” Those words left my lips like a prayer—the utter confession of desire and pent-up tension. Spencer grunted.

“You already have me. I’m yours,” he murmured, pulling up the hem of my shirt, so his hands could sneak under to feel my skin.

“And I’m yours. Totally yours. But I need to feel you,” I confessed. I was so lost in his touch and starved for more.

Spencer understood the meaning of my words, so he kissed me hungrily, walking us backward in the direction of my room.

That night Spencer proved to me, with kisses, caresses, and words of adoration, that my insecurities were unfounded. It's true that I'm not like Kimberly Garland, but I don't have to be. I have a daughter whom I adore and who

loves me, a job that fills me with satisfaction, and a boyfriend that I love and who does an excellent job of showing me how valuable and loved I can be.

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Spencer Reid’s Taglist: @dreatine​ @nomajdetective @jayyeahthatsme @rosalinasam2 @averyhotchner @tvandfanfic​ @lovelyxtom @princessmiaelicia @pastelbabygirl19  @reidsbookclub @alexxavicry @gspenc @spencerreidisbae123 @calmspencer @pauline5525mgg @disaster-in-waiting @pebble-has-a-mirgraine @anamiad00msday @chlochlosworld @milivanili99

[heavyhitterheaux]

Teenage Woes Part 3

Synopsis: You and Jack finally decide on a fair punishment for the triplets, and they get a rude awakening when they are forced out of their comfort zone.

Pairing: Husband!Jack Harlow x Wife!Reader

Read Part 1 and Part 2 first

First Babies of Private Garden Masterlist

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

It had been a week since Jack had gotten his privileges back and he wasted absolutely no time once you had told him. At this point, the triplets were still walking on eggshells around you and in order not to do anything to piss you off, if they had a question they wouldn't ask you unless absolutely necessary.

Jack had convinced you to take a bath and had run the water for you along with lighting a few of your favorite candles and adding your favorite bath bombs. Within five minutes, he was climbing into the tub behind you, and you were surprised that it had taken him that long.

Your head was laying on his chest and the two of you were in a comfortable silence when you broke it by poking his cheek and starting to play with his beard.

"Yes, baby?"

"I've thought long and hard about this and if we agree on this, we can move forward with a proper punishment for them."

"I had been thinking too, but you go first." Jack said while kissing the tip of your nose and you smiled.

"They're going to public school and we are no longer paying for them to go to a private school. That comes with privileges and having the right attitude and being respectful."

"At least for a semester, you agree?"

You slowly nodded your head yes.

"No one is allowed to use their cell phone or drive unless we let them. Axel and Ivy need to get part time jobs and Ivy asked me if babysitting Nova counts even though she's 12. I expected her to ask about Cash and Cam seeing that they're only 6."

"No she didn't ask that…" Jack said while stifling a laugh and looking at you in disbelief and all you did was nod.

"And I have another suggestion." Jack started to say and you nodded for him to go on.

"They give us a percentage of their paycheck every two weeks and we tell them it goes towards bills, but we actually put it in another savings account for them and they can't even touch that one until they're 30."

"Hmm, I like that idea. I can open a new account tomorrow."

"One way or another they are going to learn to respect us and I think that this will be the wake up call that they need."

"I think one of the things that sticks out and pisses me off the most is Axel smoking. Knowing that he had to be intubated multiple times when he was born and has a heart murmur. He's lucky that we even let him play soccer. And has asthma. Like is he trying to put himself in the hospital because I'm convinced that he is. I get that I experimented, well we both did, however we didn't do anything that stupid."

"And remember the time we found weed and he tried to blame it on Urban?" Jack added and all you did was shake your head.

"I swear, I don't recognize my kids anymore. At least the other three act like they have some sense."

"When should we tell them?"

"Well school starts back up next week so I can call tomorrow and get them enrolled and can you be in charge of making sure they find jobs?"

"Of course baby, and they can't work for us either. Because I know Ivy will ask."

"They are in for a rude awakening. We'll tell them tomorrow and if someone disobeys our rules, a disciplinary school is next. Never thought I would say that out loud but here we are."

"I hope we don't get to that point, but if we do, so be it."

"I just checked on all of them and Autumn snuck out again. She's not in her room and I watched the security cameras."

"Hmm, she can have her fun now but come tomorrow she's going to be in for it. I don't even have the energy to yell or argue with them anymore. It's the fact that I'm calm and I admit that's probably the scariest thing that I could be."

"Oh, trust me, I know."

All you did was eye him as he leaned down to kiss you.

"I love you."

"And I love you even when you get on my nerves."

"Was that last part really necessary?" Jack asked as he sucked his teeth, but all you did was laugh.

"Of course it was. Wouldn't be me if I didn't say it."

Jack simply rolled his eyes as he began to kiss down your neck and you knew where this was going.

"You aren't tired yet?" You asked and he immediately shook his head no.

"I've missed out on an entire month and I need to make up for lost time so spread your legs and let me work."

The next morning, you got up early and fixed breakfast for everyone for the first time in about a month and a half. Jack woke up about thirty minutes after you and came down to help you. All you could basically put him in charge of was drinks, but you were still grateful to have his company.

Meanwhile upstairs, the triplets had congregated in Axel's room and they were confused since they heard both of you downstairs and knew that something had to be up.

"She's actually cooking…" Ivy whispered, not actually believing it herself.

"Well maybe she forgives us?" Axel suggested but the girls shook their heads no.

"That's way too easy. She couldn't have and she didn’t even say anything about it either."

"Uncle Urby said she holds grudges like no other and the last thing we want to do is be in the line of fire when she gets pissed off."

"But we're her kids. She can't stay mad at us forever."

"Autumn, you've done enough shit for her to be mad at you for the rest of your life." Axel said and she immediately rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, okay. Don't say anything when you cough up a lung knowing that you smoke and have asthma." She quickly fired back as Ivy simply sighed.

Jack suddenly knocked on Axel's door and peeked his head in startling them.

"You three get your brothers and sister and come eat."

"Dad! What is mom up to?" Axel asked and all Jack did was laugh to himself.

"You three will find out soon enough, come on."

The three of them exchanged nervous looks as Jack walked away and went back downstairs.

"Welp, we're all going to die. So it was nice knowing you two." Ivy said before walking out Axel's room to get Nova while Axel went to get his brothers.

Once downstairs, everyone had fixed their plate and was eating at the table when you and Jack were simply eyeing each other making the triplets even more nervous. Ivy quickly caught on with you two exchanging looks and finally asked.

“Um, why are you two looking at each other like that?”

“Babe, you want to tell them?” Jack asked while looking at you as you were sipping on your tea.

“Well, if you insist. Ivy, Axel, Autumn, the oldest of my children who I carried for 33 weeks and had to be resuscitated twice once they cut you out of me even though Autumn claimed that it wasn't a big deal and you all still continue to disrespect me, me and your father have something to tell all of you.”

“Wait…. YOU DIED?” Axel exclaimed since you had actually never told them.

“Not once, but twice. Stay on topic, Axel. And you almost did too, but that's not what this conversation is about." Jack quickly cut in while the girls were looking at you with concern.

“But you never told us that!” Ivy exclaimed and Autumn looked to be upset.

"We need to unpack that because…. WHAT?"

“Another story for another day when the three of you are actually back in my good graces again.”

Nova, Cash, and Cam stopped eating to try and listen in on what was going on with their siblings as they nervously looked on.

“Come next week, the three of you will be going to public school since me and your father are not going to pay for you three to go to private school that has top tier educators and continue to disrespect us so that’s a thing of the past, Ivy and Axel, you two need to get jobs and all three of you will decide which bill you want to contribute to in the house since Autumn already has one. You are not allowed to have your cell phone unless we say so and you can only drive to and from work. If one of you steps a toe out of line, you don’t want to know what is going to come after that because you definitely won’t like it. I do not expect any failing grades either.”

There was only silence for a matter of seconds before you quickly heard their protests.

“PUBLIC SCHOOL?”

“WITH NORMAL PEOPLE!?”

“WE HAVE TO PAY BILLS NOW?!”

“WE HAVE TO RIDE THE BUS TOO?!”

“As long as you live in this house you will abide by our rules and respect them and we aren’t going back on this punishment so you three will have to deal with it.” Jack told them as Ivy simply had her mouth hanging wide open, but her face quickly turned to a look of anger as she looked at Autumn.

“This is all your fault! You told her that we were cut out and not pushed out and looked what happened!” Ivy said while rolling her eyes.

“How is this all my fault? I didn’t tell you to cuss out your teacher!”

“No, but you had to go and be a bitch and be disrespectful to our mother who would do anything for us and you’ve acted out ever since Nova was born because you were jealous that you weren’t the baby anymore!”

“We were only four when she was born!”

“And you still act as if you’re four years old! You almost let Nova fall down the steps ON PURPOSE when she was little and she would have seriously gotten hurt if I didn’t catch her in time!  You’ve always been the one to get in trouble and now we’re in trouble right along with you! And always beg daddy to bail you out when you know that you’re in the wrong. You’re so selfish!”

“How am I selfish? I have covered for you plenty of times when you snuck out with Damien!”

“YOU LITERALLY SNUCK OUT LAST NIGHT!”

“YOU TWO, SHUT IT RIGHT NOW! And we do NOT call each other names, Ivy!” You yelled and the two of them instantly went quiet.

“Ivy, when did you sneak out?” Jack asked while looking at her and all she did was stare back at him while picking off her fingernail polish.

“Don’t lie because we have security cameras.” He continued as Autumn was smirking.

“Autumn wipe that smirk off your face. It looks like we now have to make an executive decision. Babe? They do their junior year and entire senior year in public school.”

“Now, wait a second! I was going to be dance captain this year!”

“Autumn, shut your mouth because I’m not waiting for a damn thing and it looks like they’ll have to choose someone else. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes and Ax, you’ve been mighty quiet but let me tell you if we as much catch you smoking or even smell weed on you knowing that you have asthma, you don’t want to know what’s going to happen. The last thing we ever want is you having an asthma attack and getting a call from the hospital because your inhaler didn’t work. We have gotten enough calls from the hospital concerning you to last more than four lifetimes. When you were born you literally couldn’t even breathe on your own.”

“And no boyfriends or girlfriends so NO dating. Open your mouth to talk back to either of us and we’ll ship you off to military school at this very moment. Your choice, so choose wisely. Now enjoy your breakfast while I make a few calls. Jack, the only thing that they can look on their phones for are jobs today. Once they fill out at least five applications, they have to give it back to you. Do you agree?”

“Sounds like a plan to me.”

“We love the three of you very much, but you’ve left us no choice and have brought this on yourselves. I hope this serves as a good lesson to you and maybe just maybe if you three actually stick to being on your best behavior, you’ll slowly start to earn your privileges back.”

“Mommy?” You heard Cash ask and you quickly turned to him.

“Yes, my baby?”

“Can I have more orange juice?”

“Of course you can and Nova and Autumn come in the living room.”

“Am I in trouble?” Nova asked terrified as you poured juice for Cash and you shook your head no. She hated getting in trouble and would always cry when she was younger if she was caught doing something that she wasn’t supposed to do.  

“No, just need you for a second.”

The three of you walked into the living room and you gestured for them to sit down.

“Autumn, I am tired of this imaginary competition between you and Nova and it needs to stop at this very moment.”

“I…”

“No, and do not pretend to not know what I’m talking about because Ivy is right. We prepped you as much as we could but I didn’t even know I was pregnant with her because I would have liked to have done a better job. You are now 16 years old and she is 12 and looks up to her big sisters and wants to be like you and Ivy. We love all of you EQUALLY and no one has gotten special treatment at any time. So, do a better job of being a sister to her. I don’t have mine anymore and I wish that I did so the two of you better learn to get along. When me and your dad are not here anymore, all you’re going to have is each other. Do you understand?”

“Yes.” She quietly said while looking down at her feet.

“Nova, do you understand?”

“Yes.”

“The two of you can go finish eating.”

“Mom, what ever happened to your sister?” Nova quietly asked as she got up from the couch and Autumn went back into the kitchen.

“It’s not important and it’s a story for another day.”

The triplets were three weeks into the school year when all three of them came through the front door and you could tell that Ivy had been crying. Jack was the first one to notice and asked her what was wrong.

“Ivy? What’s going on?”

“I HAVE TO WORK TODAY! WHEN AM I GOING TO FIND TIME TO DO MY HOMEWORK? AND IT’S SO HARD. I HATE PUBLIC SCHOOL.”

“Me and your mother went to public school and we turned out just fine. You’ll be okay.” Jack replied while shrugging and looking at her, when she was quiet, he spoke again.

“I hope you weren’t expecting sympathy from me because if you were, you need to look elsewhere.”

“But…”

Just then you came down the steps and saw how upset she was and asked what had happened.

“What’s going on?”

“She’s fine. Ivy, go get ready for work and you’ll do your homework once you get back.”

“I AM NOT FINE! Mommy can I PLEASE go back to private school? Public school is scary and the food doesn’t taste good and they don’t have Fiji water in the cafeteria and the drama club sucks, and….”

You held up your hand to cut her off and all she did was sigh.

“Give it a chance, bubs. You’re only three weeks in and I have the utmost faith in you.” You said while pinching her cheek and all she did was sigh.

“You two aren’t changing your minds any time soon, are you?” Axel quietly asked while looking at how frustrated his sister was.

“Nope.” Both of you said at the same time and you went to lay in Jack’s lap as you grabbed his phone from him to order food since you had been busy all day and didn’t really have time to sit down. 

“If I finish my homework before dinner, can I play on my phone for an hour?" Autumn quietly asked and the two of you simply turned around to look at her. 

"Never mind. Can I watch Netflix then?"

"Hmm, what do you think?" Jack asked while looking down at you.

"It's Wednesday. No."

"Anddd there's your answer Autumn. You can read a book instead." Jack said as he looked towards her and all she did was nod her head accepting that as an answer before going upstairs while you scrolled through Jack’s phone.

"You know Nova asked me what happened to my sister a few weeks ago."

"Are you going to tell them?" Jack asked as you handed him his phone for him to add what he wanted to the cart.

"It's not all that important. It's not affecting their lives."

"But it's affecting yours. Not as much as before but it still is."

All you did was shrug.

"No matter how much time has passed and how much she wants to talk to me, I am never giving her the time of day or him for that matter. They knew what they were doing all along for it to come back and kick them in the ass later. She literally will never be in my good graces again. She had more kids other than me so she can focus on them. She literally did drugs while pregnant with me and I was born to addicted to a whole bunch of shit so she can go fuck herself. Anyway, did you add what you wanted? I want a milkshake too."

"I added it. It should be here in an hour."

"Okay. I just want them to understand that when we're not here anymore, all they're going to have is each other and they need to start treating each other better. Especially Autumn and Nova. Nova just kind of brushes it off, but I know it still bothers her. While Autumn can just be downright mean sometimes to her. And the thing is that she had her little jealous phase and I thought she grew out of it, but within the last few months she's doing it again."

"I think because of you telling them that, that they'll come around and be better about it. When I see those two, I get flashbacks of me and Clay and I do not want that happening again. And Autumn has got the message loud and clear now. We aren't putting up with her shit anymore."

"And it won't. In the end, I know that they'll be okay and it will just take a little while for them to get there."

"Now, are you sure we can't make another one?" Jack asked you and you looked up at him like he was crazy.

"Another WHAT?!"

"Um, never mind. I'll ask you later."

"If you are talking about me bringing another person into this world, the answer is no."

"But…"

"We have 3 boys and 3 girls. We are done. My uterus is done. My vagina is done."

"I'll ask you again next week."

All you did was look up to Jack to see him smirking and trying not to laugh and you couldn’t help but to laugh yourself.

"I cannot stand you."

All he did was lean down to kiss you and you continued to laugh as he placed kisses all over your face.

"It's just because you're a damn good mother. Just to watch the way you love and care for them is amazing and I knew from the beginning it was going to be like that, despite what was going on between us."

"Those first two years were hard. Between me wanting to separate from you, postpartum depression, thinking that we were going to have to bury one child, but we're still here."

"We are and thriving despite what may be happening around us."

"I'm so thankful you were able to realize something was wrong with me when that happened." You quietly said as you thought back on it.

"I know you like the back of my hand and inside and out… literally. I know when something is wrong with my baby. But seriously, that scared the absolute shit out of me. Second to their actual birth."

"I can't describe it, but it was a weird feeling. Like an out of body experience you could say."

"And that's why you were nervous to have Nova, scared that it was going to happen again."

"And thankfully it didn't."

"I don't know what I would have done without you and I know I tell you this all the time, but I seriously do not take for granted every single moment I get to have with you. Even if we're having a good day or not. I literally cannot put into words how much I love you."

"The good always outweighs the bad and I love you more than life."

"We can get through anything as long as we have each other."

The triplets were at the top of the steps as they overheard you and Jack talking and if they didn't just feel bad before, they felt even worse now. 

They didn't say anything to each other as Ivy went downstairs to ask the both of you for her keys so that she could drive to work.

"Um, can I have my keys please?"

Since you were laying on Jack’s lap, he simply got up, but picked you up along with him with you letting out a yelp and went to get them out of the safe.

"Jackman, you can put me down now." You said as you laughed. He placed you on your feet before handing Ivy her keys.

"Go to work and then come home. No detours because we will find out." Jack told her and she simply nodded before grabbing both of you and pulling you into a hug, startling you both.

"Um, bubs, are you okay?" You quietly asked while hugging her back.

"Yes, I just love you both a whole lot. I have the best parents in the world."

"Oh. Well we love you too." Jack said while looking down at you confused and all you did was shrug.

"I'll see you both when I get back." Was all that she said before she walked out the door and all you and Jack did was look at each other.

"What just happened?" Jack quietly asked while looking at you, but you were at a loss for words.

"I'm not really sure, but I'm not mad at it."

It was now nearing the end of the semester and the triplets had been on their best behavior and following all of the rules that you and Jack had set in place for them.

The both of you knew that their report cards would be sent home today and were hoping for good results.

You were currently in your room looking over possible dresses that Julissa sent over for an upcoming event and you had told her that by the end of the day, you would decide which one you wanted.

Your door was open as Autumn poked her head in and knocked.

"Mommy?"

"I don't even remember the last time you called me that. Is something wrong?" You said while looking at her in the doorway and she quickly shook her head no.

"Then what's going on? And are you just going to stand in the doorway or come in?" You asked her and she quickly came in to sit next to you and simply stared at you.

"I got my report card." She said while handing it to you.

You took it from her and looked it over seeing that she had gotten all A's and B's.

"This is good, bubs. I'm proud of you." You said while looking back up at her and all she did was start to cry.

"Autumn? What's wrong?" You asked while putting her report card on your dresser and hugging her as she cried into your chest.

"I'm such a horrible daughter and sister. My siblings probably hate me."

"What?! No you aren't! And no one in this house hates you!"

"You and daddy have given me so many chances that I really shouldn't have gotten. And Nova does hate me! I've been nothing but mean to her since she was born!"

"Okay, Autumn, you need to breathe. Like I said no one hates you. Nova is just in her own little world, and has a very big heart. You’re her sister that she looks up to and all she wants is for the two of you to get along. I know that she'll forgive you and she wants the two of you to be close."

"And you went through so much to give birth to us and I'm sorry that I ever said that it wasn't a big deal. You died. Twice. And went through postpartum depression and you were going to separate from daddy and…."

"Pause. How did you know that last part?"

"We overheard the two of you talking." She quietly said while looking up at you.

All you did was sigh.

"Autumn Danielle, all six of you are our greatest joy and I wouldn’t change a thing because that's how we got to this point. You've been doing a lot better and all we want is for all of you to be successful, respectful, and responsible, knowing that you can lose everything in a blink of an eye. Just continue to do better, okay?"

"Okay." She said while sniffling and hugging you tighter.

"I love you and I'm sorry if I don't say it enough or don't act like it." Autumn added while playing with her bracelet that you and Jack had bought her for her birthday.

"I love you too and that is never going to change. We are always going to be here for you no matter what."

Just then Axel peeked into the room to see the two of you and made his way in also having his report card in hand.

"Mom?"

"She's occupied! Get your own!" You heard Autumn yell and all you did was laugh.

"What the? She is MY OWN. She was my mother before she was yours! I'm two minutes ahead of you!"

"And I also made it in here before you so you can leave. We were having a moment."

"Autumn, be nice! Ax, let me see the report card."

Once again, you saw all A's and B's.

"I expected nothing less, very proud of you."

"And I haven't smoked and I got your favorite muffins. They're downstairs."

"Oh, I would have known if you smoked anyway. I look at the number of puffs you have left on your inhaler. When you were using it more, you kept saying you needed another one."

"Um…"

"Bubs, I have 24 years on you. I wasn't born yesterday." You said while smirking at him.

"Autumn, move over." Ax said and she scooted over to make more room for him. 

"Mom? Can we have tacos later?"

"Text your dad the ingredients that I need."

About two hours later, Jack walked in to see three of his oldest children surrounding you on the bed with all of you knocked out sleeping and all he could do was smile.

All he did was snap a quick picture to show you later. 

Hearing his footsteps, you fluttered your eyes open to see your husband smiling at you.

"What?" You asked while smiling back at him and all he did was hand you his phone to look at the picture he took.

"No matter how old they get, they're always going to need us."

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[astorytotellyourfriends]

The one thing that everyone seems to know about Eddie Munson is that when he's not out touring the world with his band, Corroded Coffin, he makes a point to be as invisible as possible in order to spend time at home with his family. Eddie, along with his wife Chrissy of seven years and their two young children, graciously invited Vogue into their Hollywood Hills home that's about as secluded as you can get while still having that coveted Los Angeles zip code.

Vogue: I have to admit, given what I've seen of Corroded Coffin on stage, I think I expected your home to reflect a bit more of that personality.

Eddie Munson: [laughs] You can thank Chrissy for that. She's the brains behind this whole operation, I just do what she tells me.

So there's no hidden dungeon in the basement?

Hate to burst your bubble, but nope. I've been trying to get a sacrificial altar for the backyard, but I haven't found one I liked yet.

Really?

[laughs] I'm kidding. But I had you going, right?

You really did. But that's what you've always done, right? Leaned into the mania of Satanic Panic and made it work for you?

Yeah, I guess so. I mean, people are gonna believe whatever they wanna believe anyway so I might as well give 'em what they want, right? Plus, [laughs] it's a hell of a lot of fun.

What's it like having that devil-worshipper stage persona with two young kids at home? Do either of your kids know what their dad does for a living?

Oh, yeah. They [redacted] love it. Wait, can I say [redacted]?

We can't print it, but you can say it.

[Redacted] yeah. Our little one doesn't really get the whole stage thing yet, but she sure looks cute in those big-ass headphones.

And your other daughter?

Oh, if she could be on stage with me every night, she would be. On our last tour, we had this gimmick where Gareth rigged a bunch of blood packs to his drums to explode during the encore and she thought it was the coolest [redacted] thing in the world. He even offered to let her do it when we were in rehearsals!

And did she?

Maybe.

From the look on your face, I'm guessing she did.

[laughs] Don't tell Chrissy.

Scout's honor. Until this article comes out, anyway.

[Redacted]. Is it too late to say off the record?

Way too late.

[Redacted]. Oh well. Worth it. She had the biggest [redacted] grin on her face when she was covered in fake blood, it was priceless.

Seems like you might be raising a mini version of yourself. Would you support your kids following in your footsteps and joining the music industry?

[Editor's note: At this point in the interview, the eldest Munson child came running out of the back door and pounced on her father, who took it in stride and continued answering questions as though he didn't have a six-year-old hanging over his shoulder.]

I mean, if that's what they wanna do, then hell yeah.

[gasps] Daddy said a bad word!

Daddy did not, Daddy said hell.

Mommy said hell's a bad word.

Mommy also said you were supposed to stay inside, didn't she?

Pip was crying. She misses you.

Do you need a moment?

[laughs] Believe me, if I took a moment for every time I wanted to be with my kids, I'd never get anything done.

Because you love us so much?

Exactly.

How much?

To the moon and back.

That's a lot!

Sure is, kiddo. Now shush and let the nice lady ask her questions.

Ooh, ask me! Ask me! I got lots of stories.

If you don't mind?

It's your funeral. [laughs] She'll talk your ear off if you let her.

What do you think about your dad being a rockstar?

[shrugs] It's okay.

Wow, thanks for the endorsement, kid. You heard it here first: being a rockstar is just okay.

Would you rather he had another job?

[shrugs] What other job?

I dunno. Playing music's the only thing I've ever been good at.

Nuh-uh! Daddy's good at lots of things.

Like what?

Telling stories. Playing with me. One time, he built me a big castle out of pillows and chairs and blankets and we played in it all day 'til Mommy said it was time for dinner. And then we all went to bed in it. Like camping!

Camping? When did you go camping?

Mommy let us sleep outside and said it was like camping. It was when you were gone. I don't like when you're gone. It makes Mommy sad. And then I'm sad. And Pip's sad. You're not going away again, are you?

No, baby. I'm staying right here with you.

Good. [to Vogue] Do you wanna see what Daddy brought home for me last time he went away?

I'd love to.

Okay!

[Editor's note: just as quickly as she came, Munson's daughter ran off to go fetch the present from inside the house.]

Do you need a minute?

Nah. It just… [sighs] never gets easier, you know? Hearing how much they miss me when I'm gone. I miss them all the [redacted] time.

I'm not surprised. Just from the last five minutes, I can see how much she adores you and I can't imagine what it's like to leave that behind, even when it's to go on a worldwide tour.

It's tough. I love my job, don't get me wrong. It's what's given us this house, all the [redacted] that the girls need, anything they could ever want, but… [shrugs] I dunno. Sometimes giving it all up doesn't sound half as hard as leaving them is. Maybe that's just me being ungrateful.

I don't think so. I think it means you're human. Stuck between a rock and a hard place, you know? Torn between two worlds.

[laughs] Now there's an idea for an album. The dichotomy of being a rockstar and a father.

I'd listen to it.

Hell, so would I.

(might continue this with a lil follow-up fic of chrissy and eddie reading the interview before it goes to print... thoughts? 👀)

[sehodreams]

they agreed (more like he demanded) that he's the breadwinner while she stays home. but she gets bored and wants to make some money on the side (such as selling the honey that she cultivates in their garden, or selling flowers from her garden). conservative toxic riize reaction? u dont have to do all mmbrs btw 💣

Ahhhh my sweet little 💣, always bringing balance to my blog 💘

TW and Tags: toxic!conservative!riize, use of violence and gaslighting.

I think the only one who would hate that is Eunseok, the others don't mind that you have a job, or if you were doing those little works, they wouldn't give them too much importance, after all, for them they are insignificant little things in your life that at the end don't take too much of your time, and you would still be pretty much focused on them, so they would even laugh telling his friends and calling it "my wife's little hobby".

Eunseok is the only one who would burn inside, and would lose himself for a second. If you sold some of your pretty flowers to your neighbors or friends, he would say something like, "what do you need more money for? What I give you is not enough? Are you trying to tell me that what I earn from my hard work, even if it pays all our bills and keeps you well fed and dressed, is nothing to you?". Feeling like you're disrespecting him, he'd show you that side you never liked to see and that always pushed you to do your best to satisfy him. However, cleaning, looking pretty and giving him your sole focus when he was at home was not enough, he wants to control your every thought and action so you never act out and always behave like a real married woman should.

Sure you'd shake your head denying his words, telling him that you were only bored and wanted to do something on your own to keep yourself busy when he wasn't around, but doesn't matter how much you try to explain yourself to make him understand, he'll never do it, getting more angry with every word that comes out of your mouth since you're treating him like an idiot and talking back when you should've just nodded and immediately stop with his word.

Nothing would be enough to calm him after that, he'd destroy your garden, containing himself to not burn it down, he'd tell you to forget about flowers ever again, smashing the pots that decorated it one by one in front of your crying face, taking away the only place that made you feel some sort of happiness without him. Also, just to prove even more his point, he'd fuck you in front of it, and pushing your naked chest to the cristal of the sliding door, he'd order you to look at it. If you closed your eyes, simply with his hand pressing on your jaw or throat, like instinct your body would comply his wish, making you see with blurry eyes all your pretty creations scattered around like garbage, saying with a soft but firm voice, "I love you honey, but I can't let you disrespect me like that, you understand that I do what I do for your own good, right?", smiling when you nodded, because just like he wanted, since you two started, you had convinced yourself he did everything out of love.

[leidensygdom]

ENNU EPILOGUE RECAP!!

OKay! So, our campaign ended! Yesterday was the 81 session, and last one of it- Our DM did a wonderful job at running it. We basically got to ask them for the scenes we'd like to see, and the session was built around that. It's been three years, so it was wild to see it come to an end! Here's a recap tho (a lil bit more focused on my blorbos since they're the ones you know)

The epilogue happened two years after the campaign's end, with a couple of flashbacks going some time back

First scene was welcoming Blasma (one of the party members), who had been on a trip all this time to heal her soul at her grandpa's dubious laboratory. She's pretty okay currently- if we ignore soul healing is something theoretically impossible. Probably many questionable things happened there. Osten traveled with her to make sure she was doing okay

Next scene was her welcoming party. A bunch of shenanigans happened. Yxala tried so play cool aunt, got her a motorbike. They ended in somewhat odd terms and my girl was trying so bad to get her trust again

Pulsar and Tephra- each polycule's kids- appeared to be overall terribly adorable. Yxala talked a lot about her Sweet Potato. Tephra is Yxala and Relé's biological kiddo (as evidenced by the branched horns), 6 months old, and just one of these big hefty babies who is starting to munch on everything (here's a token of baby her, and what she's like grown up!)

we also got to see the closure of Mythannae, Yden and Jorven's polycule! Myth and Yden recovered their enchanted clothing business. They specialize in magical clothing adapted to specific needs- Like fireproof clothing for fire genasi, helmets with bag-of-holding like pockets so you can put them on with horns, that stuff. Jorven has now been working on music again. (For context, Myth was my previous character before I switched for Yxala!)

Blasma's player also had an epilogue for his previous character- she's a tired old lady, who is now joining another tired old lady to get in politics. An improvement, given they were cops before that

Centi got to resurrect the weird celestial wife of an old teacher of hers- Who had been snatched up by Sol Ascensus and transformed into a monster. I can't wait to show Niereva to y'all tho, she's a bit of a weird aminal (a mantis/naga-like aasimar)

She may have done a fucked up pact with a psychopomp tho-

We had Yxala's, Relent's and Uri's wedding, we knew that was coming! It took Urion a long while to recover from after the Deep Lab, and they still struggle a lot with that they did as The Onirist

We had a scene of Urion's recovery. Initially they didn't even want to come to terms with being Urion- They were The Onirist. Relé had a hard time forgiving them too, bc they DID hurt Relent a lot. Yxala was a bit more fine about it, even after having her heart carved out by them.

they're all going to therapy lol

There's actually a cult to The Onirist/Ataraxia now though! Some people loved the idea of a godly machine that could solve everyone's hurts and ailments, and they're asking for them to come back and fix the world. maybe the mind control microchips were fine, y'know

(uri isn't doing great about this)

We had the ceremony- Money and seeds are given to the partners as a sign of prosperity and life. They're gonna have a great garden.

The polycule drank (alcohol-free) wine imbued with each other's blood too bc ceremonies there go hard- (this one is seen as a bit more archaic)

And a major exchange between marrying partners is expected. They exchanged basses- They had them custom made many decades ago, with Urion's being based on clouds (after Relé), Relé's being based on fire (after Yxala), and Yxala's being based on bismuth crystals (after Uri's). Now Uri has the fiery bass, Relé has the bismuth one, and Yxala has the cloudy bass

Urion was the bassist for Demonwire, a group they were a part of with some other anarchist friends. This bass has a very long history and it's very significative. Yxala was a bit shocked.

After that, the wedding after-party took place. Blasma set a date with Osten- They didn't actually get romantically involved up until now (and it's probably gonna be very slow still gfhudhdgf)

I forgot to mention this but Urion and Relent are now involved with an organization to help the people who were affected by the Deep Lab and The Onirist's actions. Uri had a very awkward interview about it.

We had few other closure scenes here and there. Finding out two other npcs are marrying, the fact the weird undead guy somehow has a new kid, that stuff- and then we went onto the final one

Which was a concert by Demonwire. Urion played with them for the first time in 12 years, and gave an awkward speech, and it was super sweet and just a great point to end the campaign in!

With that, we're now set to go play the next campaign- Which will happen 8 years after this epilogue (ten years after the end of the major campaign events). I'm going to be playing Siegmund, one of Yxala's kids, and I'm very excited for that.

Yxala won't be doing any major stuff- She's gonna still go fight corpos in the streets and she's going back to the Mecha Derby (did y'all know she was a mecha pilot in a sports competition lmao. I'm working on her pilot fit, it's cool!). Urion is going to be back on Demonwire, mostly to raise funds for those hurt by The Onirist and Ataraxia, and will have a bigger role coming up- Specially given Siegmund's (and Vyxander, his twin) have a lot to do with that. Relent will also be doing some major stuff, but it will remain spoilery for a time. He's got some big things to handle!

I may have cried a bit at the end because it's been so long. I'm glad the characters won't be fully gone. Next campaign will have a lot more lore stuff to gush about- We're going to adventure outside the city, and meet people from all over the world. There's a country that uses souls in place of nuclear fission. It's gonna be wild! (And thank you for reading-)

[neymarcouncil]

Okay, so hear me out, it's always the jealousy imagines that are out there, but what about an imagine where a girl in the medical team or something keeps flirting with neymar and it has been going on for months or something, even tho he is married (to y/n or oc) and he always just never replies cause like, lady there is a ring on my finger, so she just assumes that he is okay with it and never tells his wife, and during a practice or something y/n decided to visit neymar on the way home and she sees that girl and tells her to stop flirting with her husband and the girl is all smug like "are you afraid he's gonna leave you for me" and y/n's like "no, I'm tired of convincing him to not tell your boss to fire you"

I got the idea from this writing prompt, so if you could please add the link in the fic, thank youu ♥️♥️

https://at.tumblr.com/write-it-motherfuckers/703390114339012608/f3uscn2aw1g7

2.7k word's

{give me imagine's or ff ideas

A simple story

Tw: grammar, people tryna link up

Y/n pov?

It's been an exact year since Neymar proposed to me our relationship has been quite healthy only arumgemts that lasted a few days but we worked it out and Davi hated to see us in disputes I didn't let our little arumgemts to tare us apart of make Davi feel uncomfortable with me in anyway

His family loved me and brought me in like I was a blood he's sister especially loved me the most she treated me like a real sister

______________________________________

                        Time skip rn

I woke up to Neymar not in bed but I heard noise's in the kitchen

I got out of bed went to the bathroom to wash my face to get my up

I got out of our room and saw Neymar was cooking for the both of us(you and Davi)

"Chef Neymar what are you making today? You said going to kiss him on the check

"F/F for one of the most important people in my life' he said to you with is casual smile

"Why don't I take over? You might be late for practice" you said to him trying to take the pan

"Fuck I forgot about practice thank you meu amor" he said letting go of the pan and quickly going upstairs

You laughed at him and quickly went to the stove to handle what he was cooking

"How does he forget a whole job just for cooking" I mumbled to myself and continuing to finishing what he was making

"Y/n what are you making" you saw a little boy call out to you, it was Davi

"Oh good morning sweetheart, I'm just finishing what your father was making, "F/F" he said out loud looking at what I was cooking

"Yep, do you like F/F?' I said to him

"I do, is it ready?" He asked me happily

"Yes it is may you go get me plate"

"Of course Y/n" he said rushing to get 3 plates for all of us"

As Davi got the plates and began to place them on the table. I dished for all of us

"There you go love" I said giving Davi the plate "Thank you Y/n" he said going to the TV room to watch his shows while eating

"No problem buddy" I said while a smile on my face

As I covered the two other dishes to go upstairs and check up on Neymar

When you opened the door to your and his shared bedroom you both bumped into each other

'Im sorry you apologized" as he did the same

"Foods ready, Come eat before you go" you said to him with a smile

'Thank you Meu amor"

As you both went down stairs you have Neymar his dish and put yours in the microwave

"You're not eating now?" Neymar said to you in confusion "I'll eat later I'm not that hunger

You said quickly going upstairs to take a shower and get ready

______________________________________

"Okay, your still here goodbye tho my love" you said giving him a hug around his neck

Neymar got up from his seat getting ready to go to the car when you stopped him

"Where's Davis baby sitter?, You can't leave him, and I'm about to leave for grocerie shopping? alone security isn't enough"

You said to Neymar leaning in the kitchen table

"Oh yeah she'll be here at around 7am "

"Don't worry" he said as he Heard the baby sitter at the door with a knock

"Hello Mr and Mrs I'm sorry I'm a bit early"

"No problem I'll leave the rules at the table call if anything goes wrong byee" Neymar said quickly taking his kit and rushing outside 

"Bye Sweetheart" you said to him leaving

"Bye papa" Davi waved to him

You were getting ready to leave and buy groceries for everyone, and maybe buy something for yourself"

______________________________________

Neymar arrived at the Psg training private era

As Neymar Parked the car and both of you got out

"Finally you made it" Kylian said to him

"Rin has been nagging us to when you were coming, she's so annoying"

"She still hasn't stopped be so clingy to me? That's getting tiring' Neymar said with a sigh

"Have you told Y/n about her?" Kylian

Questioned

"Nah I don't wanna worry her to much about"

"Alright man wish you best of luck" kylisn said they both walked to the training yard

______________________________________

             

"Oh my God, Neymar there you are" Rin yelled running to hug Neymar

"I thought you got hurt, never scare me like that"

"I'm fine Rin, and get off me... please" Neymar said in an annoyed tone

"Hey Ney, let's warm up"

"I have to stay with you, imagine you get hurt I could help you, Ney pleaseeeee" Rin cried out to Neymars shoulders "Yea sure whatever"

"Thank youuu Querido" Rin said taking of her jacket

"I'm sorry for not wearing something pleasant or sporty today to maybe help you guys train" Rin said trying to get Neymar's attention

"Wow a doctor wants to work with the team"  Neymar said sarcastically

"Okay let's go Neyyy" Rin said going to catch up with Neymar

"On my I don't think I can run anymore I'll go sit down Ney" Rin said with her breath hitching

"Wait may I wear I shirt of yours mine looks a bit to reavling if you mind"

She wined to him

"Will you leave me alone? Then yeah whatever"

"Thank you♡" Rin said walking off to get Neymar's bag and Change as she sniffed the shirt and mumbled to herself

"God your perfect"

I walked out of the changing room just to see a random female sitting and where Neymar's seat was

I walked over slowly to her trying to Guess who she was

"Oh hello Ma'am, are you medical team or something?"

"Oh no, I just came back from somewhere and decided to visit someone"

"And that shirt looks like I've seen it who's is it?" Y/n questioned

"The Neymar jùnior let me wear it" Rin said confidently

"He did? Oh Alright" Y/n said tensely

"What's wrong?"Rin was cut of by Neymar walking by to say give you a hello and and a peck on the check he didn't know you we're coming to visit him

"Oh, your the 'Y/n' huh?"

"Yea, if i may ask how do you know me?" You asked her

"Me and Ney are close thanks to this job so he's been acting like he weird for someone named Y/n, and that's you"

"You're an imbosel going after married men" Y/n said blanky

"Why scared I'll take him from you keep thinking that, we all know it's true"

"No, I'm thinking why hasn't we report you and Leave you in fucking bloody hell, it's a real pity your parents aren't child free you know?"

"Someone's scared I'll take him huh? How cute, that ring on a finger cna always be taken off reminder!"

"And sueing can always be free you know that"

"I feel unwanted by you Y/n so I'll leave bye honet!" Rin Said leaving you pissed already

            Later during the day

______________________________________

Narrator pov

Neymar got injured by his ankle so the medical team had to take a inspection though his whole leg to make sure he was fine

You got a little bit worried from seeing his face in complete pain

"You guys can head out I'll take a look at him" Rin said after they placed him down

"Okay Ma'am" the two doctors lead out of the room leaving you alone with Neymar

"Are you okay Ney, don't worry I'll take care of you♡" Rin said with a glowing smile on her face

"It's just my ankle Rin, Nothing that serious" He argued

"Your a very key player Ney, everything's important you have to take of your shirt for testing"

A sudden knock played out to the door

Sigh "Come in Rin answered annoyed by seeing your figure at the door

"I just came to check if he was okay?'

"Y/n, don't worry I'm fine just an ankle problem'

"You know you're distracting me from working on Him'

"Apologies I'm advance we just really have to go"

"Oh then you'll have to wait... Outside.

"No problem, I just need the key's from his bag"

You quickly grabbed his bag and lead out"

"Okay she's gone now, Shirt off examination time"

Examination over bc I don't know what they do.

"All done, Visit me every morning to check perfectly tho"

"Uh alright thanks"

______________________________________

"Are you Alright?" You quickly got out of your seat

"Yeah Rin ran some useless Tests but I'm all fine okay?"

"That's great to hear let's go home Davi's babysitter is about to leave

"Wait Ney" You both heard Rin call out

"Your shirt silly how'd you forget? I'll go change quickly"

Rin Changed and gave him back his shirt

"Thank you for leading it to me"

"Yea No problem" You watched the two blanky just walking out of the era and waiting at the car

"Hey Y/n wait up!" Neymar said quickly catching up with you

"What's up with that girl, and getting so close with you?" You questioned getting into the car as he did the same

"Who Rin?, I don't know she's been like that since she got hired"

"And you're not reporting to her boss?"

"I didn't think about it like it doesn't mean I like her"

"Yea but still, she already on my nerves" you said looking out the window as he drove back home

"Look if it makes you feel any better Meu amor, I'll talk to her boss about it Tomorrow"

You remained silent and just simply nodded to his action

The whole trip was silent you didn't want to talk to him thinking he had been okay with her busy flirting with him

You both got home and Davi rushed to hug his father's leg

"hey buddy missed me?" He crouched down to give him a hug too

As soon as you walked into the house Davi slide away from his father's hug to come hug you

"Hey there Davi, how are you" you questioned him and he simply have you a smile

Neymar stood back to his normal height and held your wrists making making you worried

All Davi did was go back to watching TV

You both went upstairs he went to take a shower and you were getting the bed ready

You saw as He got out of the bathroom with his pajamas on

"Y/n do you wanna talk?" He's face seeming worried and guilty

"He sat at the edge of the bed and you were standing Infront of him

"Look Y/n, I'll report her as soon as Tomorrow"

"Why didn't you sooner" you exclaimed

"Because I never really payed much attention to her, I have you"

"That doesn't make it better but I shouldn't be mad or jealous over small stuff I'm sorry"

"It's okay I'm sorry too, are we good?"

"Yeah we're good" you said with a smile Carling up your face

"I see that smile, Come on let's go make dinner" he said getting up and holding your hand

You and Neymar made dinner for You,Him and Davi as soon as you were all done eating you washed the plates and had to take Davi to bed and you both Also went to your shared bedroom

"I think I gonna sleep now good night my love"

You said resting your head on his chest as he switched off the lights and wished you a goodnight

Morning came and Neymar left early then usual even Davi was still asleep you decide to take a bath and get something ready to eat you woke up Davi and he quickly too a shower you gave him he's food and both you headed out of the house

"Y/n am I also coming to see dad?" Davi questioned in the back seat while you were driving

"Yep, I just need to also give him his food is that Alright?"

Davi just nodded going back to play with his iPad

You both reached The psg era you got out of the car and opened Davis door to unbuckle his safety belt

He got out of the car holding your hand  but still glued to his device

You walk past to see Rin with a box of medical supplies with her and a fuming expression on her face

"This is all your fault you fucking cunt, don't worry none of this is over be warned."

She said fo you storminess out of the Psg era

"Oh she's fired" you mumbled

You and Davi both Walked out of the era looking for Neymar as you found him coming out of an office room

"I see she's fired, here's you lunch to by the way" you said with a closed eye smile

"Yeah she's fired and there isn't practice today so we can have a whole free day!"

"That's perfect we can finally have a night together" you excitedly

Narrator pov

Neymar decided to leave now as he wanted to spend most of the day with you both of you left psg's training era and decided to relax most of th day and go out at around night time

Davi was already asleep in the car drive so he decided to put him in bed and let him sleep

As you both got home you felt a weight getting lifted from you

"Love, do you think we can get take out today I don't feel like cooking today?"

"Of course, you don't always have to cook Meu Amor"

"I know Davi's already fast asleep so I thought you might be hunger"

"Don't worry about it, let's just get ready"

Neymar ended the conversation with a slight peck on the check

You went into your closet to find a dress/suit to wear

(I don't want to pick for you bc it's Y/n u🤷)

As soon as you found your outfit for you a night with your husband he already had gotten ready before you finished, he was already waiting for for you downstairs you went down as a rush

"You look beautiful as always" Neymar complicated you

"Thank you and you look handsome as always" You complicated him back

"Ready to leave?" "Yep let's head off"

Neymar went to lock Davi's door and the house you waited in the car for him busy scrolling on your phone

As he opened th car door and entered "Alrighty then let's head off"

"You still haven't said where we were going too you know?"

"It's a surprise that's why" he said rolling his eyes

As you just continued scrolling through your phone

You both finally arrived at your detention and you were shocked to see "A club?" You questioned

"No a club I helped you in"

"Oh yeah, but if there's paparazzi following us I'm out"

"There won't I promise" he laughed at you word's

"Alright let's go"

You both went Into the club era trying your best not to be spotted and go to a private line at the party

Just after a few minutes you saw bright flashes and some recorded phones around Neymar

"Are you both official?"

"Neymar you've moved on from bruna?'

"How does it feel being in a relationship with one of the best football players?"

You quickly ran away from them holding Neymar wrists

You both hide under the table and sneaked Into the car

You heard Neymar suddenly laugh

"Oh my GOD what a day" he said in between his laugh's

"Just drive"

"Alright" he said teary from laughing

You both went home you were pissed paparazzi ruined you day with him but he made it up to you by watching a movie and cuddling with each other

End.

LMFAO correct any mistake I wrote this at 2am I'm literally dying ong

https://at.tumblr.com/write-it-motherfuvkers /703390114339012608 /f3uscn2aw1g7

Was there promote go check it out bc this story is kinda like it? Ion

I wanna kms I don't know if I'm doing this right I'm usually a Wattpad writer and write w parts so ion about here btw gimme request's

(2 am mfs help(

[angelisgonnastartchangingurls]

tell us everything about your day yesterday

oh, ok!

i woke up at 5:30am and went out for a run. it was pretty short, 3 miles, i was back in a half hour. i got really sick a few weeks ago and my lung capacity is still not 100%, i ran five miles a few days ago and i threw up on the sidewalk.

anyway, when i got back home i paced around in the backyard for ten minutes to cool down, and then i slipped back into the house to my bedroom and woke up jake by sucking his cock. we fucked (me on top, no real foreplay, the cocksucking only lasted a few seconds and we went straight to fucking) and we came at the same time, and then i laid in bed leaking while jake got up and showered as the kids woke up. at this point it was like 6:40. i got up and made oatmeal for my kids (with blueberries!) in a robe and jake was all dressed and ready before 7, so i left him to get the kids dressed and stuff and i answered a bunch of emails. i do this now in the mornings so i can get to the office after everyone but i already have them working on stuff. LOL.

the kids were playing for a bit before school, and margot woke up, so jake made breakfast for me and margot and himself, so i ended up out there with them having coffee and chatting until 8:10, and I was still in just a robe, so Jake walked the kids to school, which is usually my job.

i got dressed (no shower, LOL. white panties, no bra, jeans and a t-shirt - very professional) and margot was making a shopping list so i tried to remember everything i needed (i forgot most of it, i always do, so i have to go to target today). and then jake got home so i kissed him goodbye and left for work. i got to the office at 9:20. i had meetings with various little teams from 10-12 and by the end of the second meeting I was very bitchy and everyone was like, "OK stop giving angel new information" which i thought was a very insightful analysis of me as a coworker.

i had coffee and two cigarettes with jane, a fairly recent hire who is like a 40s goth punk chick who reminds me a lot of ivy if ivy had never gone corporate and had a dozen babies. i love jane, she's 15 years sober from heroin and she rocks. she also compliments my waist a lot, she (like many of you lol) can't believe i pushed two kids out of my pussy.

then i walked to my friend casey's work to meet her for lunch. i don't know if i ever talked about casey. i think so? she is like 27 years old and she has a baby and a much older husband and a stepdaughter who is 19. when i was in my lexi-obsessed phase she was adjusting to returning to work with a baby in her life so we didn't hang out much but now we see each other all the time.

we had lunch at a bagel place and i was back at work by 1:45, just in time for more meetings, but these were with clients and i was nicer. the t-shirt with no bra was a very good strategic decision, one of the bigger guys at the company stared at my tits the whole time, and agreed with everything i said. i wore my hair down too and played with it a lot, you know, alternating between ditzy hair twisting and sort of gathering it and arranging it behind my back like i was about to put it into a blowjob ponytail.

N.B. the ponytail blowjob is such a stereotype/meme but i never do that. i let my hair fall all over the place when i am sucking dick. men love my hair.

i had an hour in my office during which i accomplished literally nothing. i looked at my phone and deleted some emails. that's it. then i had a meeting with my boss, and we talked exclusively about sex with our respective partners. his wife is cumming really easily lately, which on the one hand he likes and on the other hand doesn't like because she's wrapping up sex really early. he said about half the time he doesn't get beyond eating her pussy; she cums and then sucks his cock and won't stop until she's swallowed every drop. but even when they get to fucking, he said she cums in like 40 seconds and hops off to suck his cock. i told him to start slapping her clit with his cock to stop her orgasms. he said she'd get so mad at him if he did that and i said, "i would beg for more." anyway, he told me i am doing a great job with the team lately so i flashed my tits at him.

alice called me at 4 and just clearly wanted to talk at me, but i let her, it's kind of like a podcast, and so she was in my ear for the end of my work day and my ride home.

when i got home, margot and the kids were in the park, so jake fucked me in the kitchen, quick and hard, panties and jeans down, bent over the kitchen island, his hand on my clit. he came inside me again and i pulled my jeans and panties up right over the mess and walked around like that all afternoon, making dinner and catching up with everyone. dinner, did a puzzle with my daughter, bathtime for the kids, storytime, bedtime, and i just took my jeans off and relaxed on the couch with jake and margot and we watched a movie. i fell asleep on jake's shoulder after the movie was over, and he moved me over on the couch, took margot to her room, fucked her and came on her tits, took a picture of it and sent it to me, which woke me up, LOL, but i was too tired to move so i let jake come in, naked, and carry me to bed. at some point in the night i took my panties off because they were full of dried cum, and this morning i woke up next to jake, he was naked and i was in just a t-shirt, so i pushed my ass against him until he woke up and fucked me from behind nice and slow. i came twice.

[mr2swap]

Exchange therapy: Take a picture of "me"

-Hey son! Take a picture of me with Superman! The boys in the gym will love this! - my son slowly leaned towards the plastic statue that attracted so much attention from all the children, I took out the cell phone from a small backpack and with my small hands pointed towards the 30-year-old frontman me and took the picture then flexed his arms showing the messy hairy bush that was in his armpit even though now I'm in my son's skinny body and I can't smoke or drink I was having fun, unlike my son I was sober, maybe it wasn't a good idea to leave him my credit card, but he knows what he's doing, and I'm having an amazing time at the water park!

The relaxed and carefree life of a teenage boy had completely intoxicated me, there were times when I even forgot that the man with the hairy pecs in front of me was originally me, the body-swapping machine had done a great job with us, everyone our skills and memories were also exchanged, I barely remember what it was like to be an adult, I even forgot how to drive!

Before all this relationship with my son was screwed, we used to argue all the time and my son started to hide things from me like that my son was actually gay and that my ex-wife had a hot new boyfriend, after the divorce with his mother my son's grades dropped to the ground, he started fighting at school and behaving like a real bratty teenager. Still, of course, that was after-life swapping therapy.

The school psychologist recommended me to one of her colleagues with an experimental therapy sponsored by SwapCorp, it's pretty simple me and my son swapped our lives for a month to understand each other better, and after that… well we're still at it, supposed that would only last a week, the therapy was a complete success!

The first thing my son did when he got home changed his clothes and go straight to the gym to test his new strength and the first thing I did was lock myself in my new room to play video games, eat Doritos and discover the pleasure of jerking off a cock. Young and virgin with my soft little hands, when he started touching me I couldn't stop until I shoot my hot and stinky load on a dirty used t-shirt.

In just one week, my son had become a responsible adult, I didn't even miss a day of work when he was in my body. I don't think anyone touched him we exchanged our bodies, not even my ex-wife, it was a bit awkward when I heard her new boyfriend fuck while I was sleeping in the next room in my son's body.

But the strangest thing was when guided by my adolescent instincts I quietly sneaked into my wife's room and masturbated watching how my new "dad" fucked the witch who had made my life miserable for so many years, her new boyfriend was super hot! He had a thick cock and a hairy ass that took all the attention away from my wife's breasts that I missed so much.

With one hand I tried to silence the moans that came out of my mouth and with the other, I massaged my teenage cock until I ejaculated while she wore the pajamas my son had given her the year before for Christmas.

While reviewing the photos on the phone, my son ordered a couple of drinks and flirted with the bartender. I had been away from romance for too long, but my son had only been in my body for a couple of weeks, and now he's quite a casanova, maybe it's better if we stay like this for another time he seems to be enjoying his new authority and his new responsibilities as a single father.

This is supposed to be only temporary, but the doctor secretly confided in me that we could stay like this as long as we wanted we just need to both agree on this, it's not so bad being an ordinary teenager when you get used to having to masturbate 6 times a day with gay porn and getting a boner in sports class.

Hey! You can support me to continue creating stories and see all my stories on my patreon and have access to the stories on my discord server.

[trash-soup]

Weird and fun and slightly unhinged (and SPOILER FILLED) Stardew Valley headcanons i have:

My cows are transmasc (like Otis from Barnyard) so every time I (the player character) see them i say "Gentlemen" and give them a nod

Maru and I share notes on things we've built in the past few days every time we see each other

M. Rasmodius had two kids with two different women in town (which is why the witch divorced his ass): Abigail (duh) and WAIT FOR IT...Sebastian. We know nothing about Sebastian's father, but Seb himself is very attuned to nature and has the same slight smugness at the beginning as the Wizard. Do Seb and Abigail know they're related? No. Will they ever? Who knows. Do they feel a strong connection between them? Yes. Has it been confused for a crush and will it dissapate into a sibling-like relationship eventually? Absolutely.

Marnie knows she deserved better than Lewis. That's why she's been considering Marlon.

Gil (the monster slayer rewards guy) is Jodi and Harvey's dad.

Lewis siphons money from the town's taxes into various "town _____ funds", most of which he keeps for himself. (gold for a solid gold statue is expensive) the only reason he doesn't keep the agriculture fund is because I moved into the farm.

Evelyn and Grandpa had a long and storied romance before she met George. They were middle school sweethearts all the way through high school, but when they graduated, she left for a job in the city, and he stayed behind on the farm. He eventually met our grandmother, who he married, and when evelyn came back she was a bit saddened but she kept in touch with both of them. Soon after she met George, and that was that.

Pam and Clint are cousins

Gunther is actually running a small smuggling ring with his wife, the Travelling Cart woman (I call her Maureen). They smuggle artifacts and supplies over enemy lines.

"Our beloved Mona" in the cemetery is actually Jas and Shane's Mom, Marnie's Sister. Shane had a rough relationship with her, opting to go with his dad in the divorce, but when dad turned out to be an abusive ass, he came back to mom's. He and Mona got along a bit better and he even started thriving in school. She would make him homemade Jalapeno bacon pepper poppers as a reward for good grades, and threw him a pizza party when he made the Varsity gridball team. After he graduated, she had Jas and named him her godfather on top of being her half brother. Then she had an awful accident about a year and a half later. Shane spiraled, latched on to the addictive tendencies given to him by his father's genes, and began drinking. He asked aunt Marnie if they could crash with her for a while. He's still reeling from his mom's sudden death 7 years later when we move in.

Demetrius is working on secret military projects but can't let his family know, so he wanders off (to the lakeside and to the fountain) to work on them.

Harvey has a shelf in his apartment full of ultra expensive and intricate model planes, half of which were gifts from Jodi

Kent and Harvey have a strained relationship due to Kent having seen the true horrors of war and Harvey glorifying service in the armed forces. They get along but only just.

Pierre's secret stash is not porn, but Money. He keeps a rather large sum of gold tucked away from his family "just in case".

Shane and Alex hang out and talk about gridball more than you would think. In fact, Alex is one of the very few people Shane likes.

Claire (the cashier from Joja) hates Morris. She hates working for Joja. She hates the fact that they're causing problems in the valley. She wishes she could just own her own business here some day. And she does. When the Junimos restore the Joja building into the movie theatre, she gets a mysterious letter in the mail that says "Come bak tu valley, muvee plase is yours" (Junimos had to ask hat mouse to write it)

I have a ton more but that's it for now.

[sukifoof]

I was thinking about Asriel as the Royal Scientist, and I remember in one post you said in the tags, how you considered drawing him as one for your Asriel survives AU, before saying you can't imagine him holding down any job without freaking out

Now, I'm not asking you to draw him anyway, I'll be fine either way. It is just important context cuz that's what gave me my personal thoughts right now about him, and I wanted to spread them because I think they're optimistic in the end, if cliché and generic (warning, I'm really bad at sympathizing with other people, so I might be just, completely wrong about what I say next)

I have little doubt Asriel would be very lost at first about what he is going to do with his life now that The Barrier is gone. Typical confusion after exiting a time loop, compounded by the years of untouched trauma and other mental health issues. Maybe spiralling further as he may consider himself a burden for all those problems he can't handle on his own

He would try resuming being The Prince, go back to what he thinks people want of him, but it's not going to work, he distrusts himself too much after everything he has done. When he inevitably fails, he hits a new low. But eventually, perhaps with Frisk's encouragement, he finds it in himself to open up about it, talk to other people, seek help

Alphys, who in a very real sense is his creator (slightly more metaphorical in this AU, but she's still the one who woke him up from his coma), and one of the few people who know how he works, might be one of the first people that Asriel speaks to about his problems, feeling that she'd understand. They talk to each other about the regrets that they have, bonding over similar troubles, and maybe shared interests (bonding as friends. Alphys is faithful to her wife, and Asriel is on the aspec, so it doesn't go further)

At some point one of them might just naturally suggest that Asriel help out around the lab, and while he's helping, and they're talking with each other, Alphys realizes just how much knowledge about all sorts of things Asriel has, and one day she offers that he become a full-time assistant at her lab. This freaks him out, and in the moment he rejects it and runs away, which both of them later despair over, in a sense of "oh god I was to hard on him/her, now I destroyed our friendship, I'm the worst, I can't do anything right"

But eventually they talk to each other about it (encouraged by their friends) and they realize that neither is harboring any resentment towards the other, and they make amends. Asriel starts out working with her part-time, and while it's initially very scary for him, and he probably has several other freakouts along the way, I think Alphys, being prone to freakouts herself, would be more than understanding. Eventually he becomes her full-time assistant after all

Hopefully combined with therapy which he really, really should receive, he eventually starts feeling good about himself again, even if it takes years to get there. And he realizes, yes, this is the job he wants to do. He can help people without actually having to be there, with a much more manageable amount of responsibility to handle. He's finally happy, as the Assistant Royal* Scientist (* although at this point it is possible that Asgore and Toriel would abdicate, seeing as their son won't take over from them, it might just be easier to end the monarchist government right then and there)

Of course, while Asriel is immortal, Alphys is not, and as the decades pass, she will get older, weaker, less able to do her job. The day when she resigns from her post to let the (physically) younger Asriel become the next Royal Scientist will be a difficult one for both of them, and even more so when she finally turns to dust, although I hope that by this point he would be better equipped to handle the loss of those close to him. It will still hurt, but I hope with new experiences and skills he's learned over the years, he'll be able to deal with that pain, or the pain when his parents or his other friends die, better than he did with the pain of Chara's death

Frankly, not being seen as royalty anymore, especially by the younger generations who won't remember monarchist rule, he might find life easier as he's no longer so isolated as he was as a prince, no longer has to reach the same standards as before

The trauma, and other pain that follows, they will never fully leave him, but he's got a quite literal eternity to learn how to live with them and not let them control his life. And if mortals can do it, then I think he too can, over the course of several years, or even decades, figure it out. I think, as fucked up as he is, at the end of this nightmare road there is happiness waiting for him, however long it takes him to get there. I just want him to be happy goddammit. And I think that a 30-or-40-something Asriel will be happy

Thanks you for listening to my TED talk, and have a magical day

HI IVE BEEN MEANING TO ANSWER THIS FOR SO LONG CUZ ITS SO GOOD AND IN CHARACTER!!! u are so right for this i LOVE this i dont have much to add on cuz ur points are all so good. asriel has so many issues and i think he would probably feel a Bit Better if he was able to put his knowledge to use to help people and it might help him come to terms with death a little better..... anyway they are siblings and they occasionally bother each other. extremely kind mayor who took over after papyrus and local freak scientist who is seemingly some kind of sludge <3 i may draw more of this when i get the chance cuz the idea of these middle aged freaks is so funny to me i love them dearly

[crystalelemental]

My wife moderates a fanfiction forum, and informed me that is it Femslash February. We have no idea if this is something specific to a particular fandom, but I'm interpreting it as a general "post yuri." Can do, boss. I hope to have a few for the month, though admittedly life circumstances as they are, fewer have made any progress than I'd like. But, I did finish some. Starting with one for Little Goody Two Shoes, because at the end of the day, I just think Elise/Lebkuchen is cute.

I've mentioned before that, in the broad scope of the game, I think the sacrifice endings are more thematically resonant, while the happy endings can feel a bit off. These posts are a good summary of my general stance on the endings, and why they don't feel like they land as well. I do think the story does best with the sacrifice ending, and really sets up that this is what Elise would do.

That said, I'm currently in a state of enjoying the fluffy stuff, and I really like Lebkuchen, so I make a bit of an exception for Bells of Dawn. Not because I think it's doing anything better than the other two happy endings, it's purely personal preference. But I do think it's a bit...abrupt, and kinda too neat and tidy? I feel like Elise's life isn't going to change all that much, especially at first. Traveling costs money these girls do not have, and Elise's work history as it is, she's likely going to fall into the same odd jobs as before. Her decision to pick Leb over wealth, while a fluffy emotionally happy outcome, means she's still poor and breaking her back for minimal pay, and likely a bit miserable. I don't get into it as much, but Leb's kinda similar. Her whole deal is being kinda frustrated at how much the villagers take advantage, demanding her attention and support at all hours of the day while Father Hans is overly critical of everything she does that isn't perfect. But while she's leaving to escape that, Leb's also open about how she knows she's working herself sick for these people even as she hates it, and isn't making much effort to get away. As far as the canon ending goes, Leb's still at the church where Elise expected to find her; she'll stay where she hates being without intervention. Running off may eventually break that hold, but the first thing she's likely to encounter is that she's going to be quick to help people and burns herself out doing it because she won't directly push back. I don't think either start their journey happy.

So while I'm all for a satisfying ending, and wanted to write something I thought was cute for the two of them, I did want to give the impression that it's not all ideal. That both aren't entirely happy in their situation at first, but the difference is having each other. The main draw here is that Elise would put Lebkuchen's safety first to reach the good ending. It's not so much "I can forego the desire for riches," but rather "I can't put Leb in danger for it." If it wasn't for Leb's presence, I doubt she'd bat an eye about a demon contract for wealth.

This was also an attempt to be a little more...purposeful in what I'm writing? I dunno how it turned out, but I like to think it went okay. Hopefully you enjoy it, too.

[onlyonetifosi]

I don't want to

-> Word Count: 1810

->Author note: I would appreciate if you send some ideas or requests for me to write. English is not my first language so sorry for mistakes <3

I'm so excited to meet Lando's family! His niece is adorable and I can't wait to play with her. Lando is such a great guy, and I know his family will be just as wonderful.

His sisters Cisca and Flo are going to be there aswell as Oliver, his older brother and his wife and daughter Savannah and Mila. I can't wait to meet them all. Lando speeks wonderfull things about everyone.

-Baby, you have the lego's for Mila?- I ask my boyfriend while leaving our house to get in his luxurious papaya mclaren to go to his family's house in Bristol.

-Baby, of course I do. You know how much I love my niece.- he responds kissing me on the forehead as we get in the car and start our drive to his family's home. We make small talk about work and our plans for the future as we drive, and before I know it, we're pulling up in front of a beautiful house.

Lando opens my door for me and helps me out of the car, then we walk hand in hand up to the front door. Lando's mom greets us at the door with a big hug and a warm smile.

-Hello, you must be Lila. Lando has told us so much about you. Come in, come in.- she says as she steps aside to let us in. We step into a beautiful home with a warm and welcoming feeling. Lando's mom leads us into the living room where we're met by his brother, sisters and his dad.

Everyone is so friendly and I feel right at home. We spend the day playing games, chatting and getting to know each other better. It's been such a great day and I'm so glad I got to meet Lando's wonderful family.

It was almost lunch time and I was with Savannah feeding Mila some fruits and playing with her new lego's, wich she loved.

While we were doing so, Lando, Adam, his dad, and Oliver were chatting looking at us.

-I see why you love her, you are made for eachother, she's so sweet and caring and she's going to be a fantastic mumone day- His dad said. Lando smiled and nodded getting up from the couch and walking over to us. He bends down to pick us up and kisses me on the cheek before laying Mila on her playmat. -Hey babygirl- he says while kissing her head, she gurgled at him and he began talking baby talk with her. I couldn't help but laugh watching them together, it was so cute! We were all sitting there chatting when Lando's phone began beeping. He was looking at his phone mouthing sorry to me as he put it to his ear.

-What?? No? No you can't be serious! Okay... okay... I'll be right there! -He ended the call and stood up running his hands through his hair, obviously stressed out. His family must have seen the concern on my face because they all jumped up asking him what was wrong. -It was Zak asking me to go to the factory tomorrow- he explains and I feel very sad for not being able to spend all week at his house like we were planning. His family start to leave the living room and he turns back to me. -I'm so sorry that I have to work on our first week together.- He looks really sad and I can't bare seeing him like this. He walks off in the direction of his room not looking back. -Wait!- I call out after him but he just keeps walking up the stairs and I listen him closing the door loudly.

-Lan, open the door, it's okay baby, I'm not mad or anything, it's your job and I accept that- I try to convince him to open his door beacouse he locked it.

I hear him move around a little but he doesn't open the door. I can't take it anymore and I go lie down on my bed. I look at the time and it's 11:00 PM, he still isn't back are anything. I'm really worried about him so I decide to go see if he's doing okay. -Lan baby, please open the door- I beg him to come out and open the door but there's no response from his side.

-Lan, please baby, they're really sorry, they say that the statistic of his last sim practices didn't went good and they couldn't do much more than make you repeat them- I try to explain to him why he had to work today so maybe that can calm him down a little bit. But there's still no response from his side.

-Baby, please, let me in- I beg again but now tears run out of my eyes beacouse this is just getting too much for me. The only sound that comes from his side is him crying quietly which makes me cry even more. Suddenly the door unlocks and opens slowly revealing a very sad looking Lando whose eyes are red from crying and he has some wet marks on his cheeks where tears have dried up already. He looks up at me with red puffy eyes as he tries not to cry again when we stare at each other for what seems like forever before someone steps into view behind him making him plop onto the floor right after stepping out of his room causing an extremely loud sound!

I immediately jump back scared of what might happen next because something tells me that this isn't going to end good. The house get into a tense atmosphere including even Mila who can see something is wrong.

Lando looks up at me from the floor with a hurt expression as he silently cries while trying to keep himself together, I want to go and hug him and tell him everything is going to be alright but I don't want to make the situation any worse than it already is. He starts to pack his things to goback to Woking on the morning but i decide to make moves beacuse i can see how this is affecting him so i call his bosses.

I borrow his phone to have their numbers and i call them.

-Hello, Zak Brown talking, who am i talkin to?

-Hello Mr. Brown, Im Lila McMillan,Lando's girlfriend- I explain to him

-Oh, yes i remembre you Lila, what can I help you with?

-Lando is devastated because having to work more, beacuse his exhausted mentally and physically of last week and we are in bristol in his childhoom home with all his family, I call to ask if it's extremely necesary or if it can be done next week as it was scheduled ? Please Mr. Brown, we really don't want him to leave and I'm pretty sure he is not able to fly, I hope this is a clear message.

-Yes it's clear Lila, take care of him very well- see you in Woking.

I go back to the table where Lando's sitting with his family, they are all talking while eating breakfast so i sit next to Lando and I grab his hand under the table but he pulls away slightly. -Lila! What have you been doing?- i take my phone out of my back pocket and show him our texts.

-I just talked to Zak Brown to let you rest in peace and enyoying your holidays alone with no worries.- I explain to him with a smile in my face.

-Lila, you can't do that- he panicks

-Late, I already did.

-I'm gonna kill you if i get fired.

-Lando, everything will be fine. The can't get a new driver mid-season. -He starts to calm down a bit but still he looks concerned.

-Lila, you know we have a reserve driver and not for nothing- he says while looking me in the eyes with so much kindness that i feel my heart pounding fast in my chest, it's so close to mine that i can hear its beat.

-you are an idiot do you knew that?- I say with all my heart in my words. He looks at me for a few seconds and looks like he's going to say something but then his little sister comes over and sits on his lap after saying hello to me. He pushes her away quickly, walking off towards the lake so she throws some of her breakfast at him and we all laugh when we see Lando getting mad at her.

You quieten down slowly as you finish eating and help his mother clear the table up but she asks you to go see if his father in his studio because he wants to talk to you about something important. You leave the table quickly, thinking that it has something to do with Lando but when you get there you find yourself more confused than ever because his father shows you some old family albums and explains to you how this place is gonna be your home from now on and how they already consider you part of the Norris family.

You start tearing up and you wrap your arms around his neck. You were about to thank him when Lando finally walks into the room and he looks very happy. He asks his father if they can have a word in private and after an intense staredown between father and son, they finally walk out of the room. You're left there alone in the studio but with more questions than answers. Lando comes back to the studio a few hours later and he gives you a small smile before grabbing your hand and leading you towards the forest, saying that he wants to show you something important. When you arrive where lando was leading you, you see a small cabin and once you both entered you see a fantastic room with petal roses in the bed and wine.

-We are going to spend tonight here and cuddle all day- he explains while hugging me from behind. -This is our own paradise and nobody knows about it, not even my father- he adds.

We spend the night in front of the fireplace drinking wine and eating strawberries. Lando was really happy and you spend the evening talking about future plans and playing games to see who knew each other more .

-You are the first person who knows about this place- he confesses.

The next day we spend in Lando's cabin, we make love all day and we don't leave the bed. -I want to stay here forever with you, I don't ever want to leave your side- he says after making love.

You feel exactly the same and you can't imagine your life without him anymore.

I hope you like this! send me whatever you want to my asks.

I would love to know somethin about you!!

And would you like a mention list? like for me to mention you in my fics

[aladaylessecondblog]

a flame in your heart (gortash x tav pt. 17)

Author's Note: More Gortash POV. Struggled a bit with this one but didn't want to delay it any longer. Tooth-rotting fluff.

-------------------

I woke up with the worst headache I've ever had in my life. Like someone stuck a sword through my eye, out the back of my skull, and was jiggling it around just to torment me. Too much whiskey, of course, but I wasn't about to swear off drinking when I knew damn well I was probably going to just do it again. Not when the burn of that Rotgut Red is so strong it can keep me awake when I need it to.

On my side, pillows behind me, and a potion on the bedtable for the hangover. I sat up, guzzled it, and looked around for Tav once the throbbing in my skull finally stopped.

She wasn't there.

(Normally, I'm the one to wake first, or at least to get up first. When she sleeps in my bed she thinks I don't notice her pretending to still be asleep. Lazy little thing.)

I didn't remember coming to bed. There was a vague recollection of the cool night again against my skin...an owlbear, for some reason, and one of the Flaming Fists. Then a whore from Sharess's Caress. What in the hells happened?

"Ah, good morning, m'lord." One of the chamber servants entered as I continued to puzzle. "The bath is a bit cool but we can redraw it if need be."

"No. No, that won't be necessary."

I'd bathe, then I would figure out what had happened the night before...and why exactly that whore keeps showing up in Wyrm's Rock. Tav has been known to be open to sharing before, but that was before she was a married woman. Perhaps that woman was here for her, but...no, she has never looked away from me as a source of...excitement.

She enjoys my firm hand too much, and I'm certain no one else could scratch the itch she has to be controlled the way I can.

As for me...

What if she got the idea I was looking outside of the marriage for excitement, without saying anything to her first...the Black Hand is one thing, what happens with him is akin to a mass, a communion. Not the sort of thing that can be easily refused. Whores are another thing entirely.

I can do what I want, when I want. If I wanted to visit Sharess's Caress daily, I would do so. The other ladies of Baldur's Gate would likely tell Tav she should be glad of the relief.

Still...

I shall endeavor to be only what the role requires, Lord Gortash

The idea that Tav could speak those words again, turn that same look in my direction was...unsettling, and I hate the fact. As if a wall had come up between us--resignation, sadness--I still remembered that look, and I didn't want to see it again.

It is obvious now more than ever why Bane discourages love. The feeling makes me weak. Yet at the same time -

Only one of us is wearing a crown right now, my love.

Maybe it had been a slip of the tongue, but when I heard those words, there was a bloom in my chest I'd never felt before. A bloom that's still there when Tav directs her smiles at me.

Gods, I really can't get her off my mind. I don't want to tell her about that whore being in my quarters but she's going to find out anyway. Best to get the disappointment over with.

I let the valet do his job for once while I thought over the situation. Then when he was done helping me dress I asked, "Where is my wife?"

"She is currently...feeding the little Lord Cald, Archduke. From what I can gather she means to take the morning off, Berlina says she didn't sleep well."

Well, it wasn't a mystery as to why she would be worrying about that, I supposed.

Tav smiled at me as I walked in, and the bloom hit me again. Gods, what did I do to get this? Neither of us cared for one another when this started. It was a means to an end, all of it. Cozying up to her, whispering what I thought she wanted to hear, and slowly extending my power over her. Finding she wanted it...enjoyed it. Certainty in an unsteady world.

Focus

"Is he well?"

"Well enough," Tav said quietly, "Cald has another tooth coming in, and he's been quite fussy."

"Baba!" Cald spotted me, and from his spot in Tav's lap raised his arms. "Baba!"

"He wants you...you aren't still drunk, are you?"

"Of course not, I slept that off...though...speaking of which..." I took Cald from her when she offered, and looked down at--my son's dark eyes. My eyes.

And he was smiling. My son was smiling at me.

"You look upset, is he...filling his diaper already?"

Tav's words were a little unsteady, but the smile still hadn't left her face.

"No, it's nothing to do with him," I replied, waving my free hand absently. "It's...about last night."

"Ah...the trip back. I apologize." She shook her head. "You refused to come back on your own, so...I was asked to assist."

"I won't be hearing about it, will I?"

"Possibly...I asked the Flaming Fist who was with us to try and keep anything from getting out, but...I'm not sure how much he can do. You were...you were, ah...naked."

"Naked."

By the black hand, not THIS again.

"You told me you were too hot and...I suppose instead of calling for ice, or getting something cool to eat or drink your addled mind decided stripping was the best idea. I did the best I could, but...well, I imagine you were seen. I though if I carried you back as an owlbear it'd both making carrying you easier and ensure that they'd pay more attention to that than to you...but it remains to be seen whether I'm right. I haven't exactly been able to check."

"I suppose that must have been when I..."

"When you what?" she asked.

Again that look. She really must have known, I'm not the sort of man to stay quiet when I'm...enjoying myself.

"When I ordered that whore into my room."

I waited. I waited for a look of pain, or an expression of anger. But neither ever came, and Tav did something entirely unexpected.

She laughed.

The woman laughed.

Cald, in my arms, followed with a little giggle of his own. Mother happy, son happy. It was almost soothing to watch.

"I fail to see what's so funny about it, I've...we never settled if it was--if you were amenable to--"

Gods, why does speaking to this woman make my tongue malfunction?

"First of all, you could do as you please and dare me to say something about it, but I am...glad, very glad, that you think of discussing these things with me first. I'm not opposed to sharing you, so long as they don't think to take my place and we talk about it first. Our communions with the Black Hand prove that well enough...he doesn't desire to take my place, it's more that he...owns...both of us."

"But not with a--"

"Enver, let me just stop you before you tie yourself up in any more knots. There was no whore in your room last night."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because I was," Tav huffed like she was holding back a laugh. "Twice now you've gotten drunk with me around. And twice now you've mistaken me for that woman from Sharess's Caress."

"I--what?"

The thought had never occurred to me.

"You get drunk and think I'm her, but that's not even the best part." Tav's soft smile deepened. "The best part is that you see me, and tell who you think is her to bugger off because you're a married man. Both times you did that."

I--

"And do you know what else you did last night?" She went on as she stood and moved in my direction, "My dear, faithful husband?"

I had no words. There were no words in my vocabulary to convey the thing I was feeling in that moment. 'Short-circuit' would be the most apt term to describe what happened, I think.

A peck on the cheek.

"You said you loved me."

Heart pounded in chest. Throat. Ears, even. How Cald didn't notice, I don't, but he seemed to quickly be settling in, utterly comfortable where he was.

"Now, I'm fairly certain you didn't mean it, but those three words...ah, they made the entire trip worth it." Tav rested her head against my shoulder then, and reached up to ruffle Cald's hair. "My poor drunk husband, insistent he can't bed me because he's married...and when I asked why that should matter, he says 'because I love her.' Now...if you don't mind, I'm going to call the wet nurse. I have a full afternoon so I need to eat quickly and have that nap."

As she was heading for the door I finally found my words again.

"I did mean it."

Tav stopped in the doorway, just after calling for the wet nurse. "What?"

"I DID mean it," I swallowed. "That I loved you."

Every muscle tensed, pulled taut. I waited with more anxiety than I felt each passing second when Durge and I stole the Crown of Karsus. I could've died back then. But this felt--something more than the fear of death.

Tav seemed to tremble, and didn't say more until the wet nurse came in to take Cald from me.

Then we were alone again. She walked back into my room with me.

"You love me?" she finally asked.

Another pause, a lean against me, a deep breath.

"I never thought to hear those words from you. Or that I would love you in return."

I took in a sharp breath.

"But I do."

[ussjellyfish]

new job?

I interviewed at a different district on Friday. (I'm a math teacher). I have been teaching 7th/8th, with the advanced classes, because no one wants them, so the fun stuff like geometry and fancy algebra). I've had 4 different classes in the past year, which was a lot, but I did a good job.

I interviewed at a suburban district where my brother lives with his wife and kids. I have been teaching in St. Paul, big urban district. 3rd biggest in my state, 30,000+ students, 8 middle schools, BIG district.

My school has about 600 students, and 5 math teachers.

Potential new school has 1000 students, and 7 or 8 math teachers. It's wealthier. Myold school is in a nice neighborhood (too nice for me to ever afford a house) but it's very mixed economically and racially. It's in an odd position because there are some really privileged students who are really advanced and need one set of things and other students who have really strong needs another way. It's a difficult balance. The kids are great.

I'm sure the kids at the new school would be great. It's wealthier, newer building, more resources. I probably wouldn't have to fight to get whiteboard markers.

more under a cut

Murray (current school) - upsides and downsides

Upsides

I know everyone. I really like most of my coworkers. They're great. I have a work best friend. We're gaining a really fantastic 8th grade history teacher that I could work with, which would help my floor.

I'll get to teach more interesting math. I'm the department head. I have a lot of power (sort of) and I get to pick the interesting classes and can really reshape the department. (partially because no one else cares, but it's fun).

It's the least effort, I'm set up to go back there, I have a plan that works for Felix (he goes to a new school in the 4 year old program. He gets to ride the bus home, which is a big step and I'd have a much easier commute immediately.

I could move to a smaller apartment near work and walk. (in January). I'd still have to drive Felix until he's in kindergarten, but he'd go to a really good elementary school, and I'd be in a really nice little walkable neighborhood. Great little grocery store, taco place, parks, playground, walking distance to work best friend's house.

Pension/retirement here is really good, like, stunningly good.

Downsides

My principal is incompetent, tone deaf and really difficult to work with. He's incredibly privileged, lives in the suburbs (the far out rich suburbs), he has a fancy car, he loves to hear himself talk. He's...someone I avoid rather than enjoy talking to.

Assistant principal thinks she's saving the world while is literally the embodiment of every meme about terrible admin. She's the one who gives a kid a cookie when they cuss you out. She's dragging the building down in so many ways and principal can't do anything to stop her. (there's something weird where she's kind of blackmailed the district? she can't be fired, but desperately needs to retire and won't. She's saving the world, the rest of us are terrible. (she seems to genuinely believe this and it is weird).

We had to go on strike to get a 2% raise in 2020. Our contract is up again and we're negotiating, and we nearly went on strike in 2022 but they gaved at the last minute. With the economy being what it is we're probably going to ask for 5%, and not get it and...there's some uncertainty.

I don't have tenure and will finally get it after this year. (This is in the middle, I guess?)

I am CONSTANTLY asked to cover other classes because we don't get enough substitutes. (like...once or twice a week, it's a lot).

New School SLP -

Upsides

Principal seems amazing. I've only met her for an hour and half, but she trained with my favorite principal ever. She's new to the school and very excited to be there.

Math department is really competent and the way they do teaching and grading is awesome. Really neat program of self reflection for students. I'd be walking into something made by people who know what they are doing and I wouldn't have to make it. I could just use theirs.

They asked my pronouns in the meeting. I had to argue to get current job to talk about them.

I drive to visit my brother's family at least once a week, and it's 20 minutes one way (with freeway). It would be about 10 minutes, no freeway. We could walk on a nice day.

I could move in January (my current lease doesn't run out until then and the penalties are stiff). I have a wide variety of apartments to chose from, near parks, near schools, some of them are in nice walkable areas. It's the suburbs, so slightly different lifestyle. I could definitely bike to work, good paths for that.

If we live in SLP we're much closer to brother and that would even out some of the responsibilities for Dad. I'm definitely moving, by myself in January, so dad needs his own plan by then, but, who knows what he'll chose.

Downsides

Absolute chaos in the near term. I'd need to leave one job (turn everything in, exit, meet with new HR, etc etc. We're going to Scotland on Wednesday so it would be fast and furious for awhile.

I don't know anyone at new place. (I will but...that's scary in the middle term).

Felix would need a different school. So I'd have to find one. I think I can make it work, but it'll be annoying for me.

My commute will be awful until January.

It will be harder (though not impossible) to hang out with my one friend from old work.

I'm struggling here, so this one is probably better?

6th grade math is less interesting, but less behavior problems. They're squirrels, but they're cute at that age.

smaller district? if it sucks, it'll really suck. (but I don't know yet).

Pension is less good. Any salary gains I got would be gone in how much I'd have to put away for retirement.

Brother #1 who lives in Iowa says it's okay to have two decent choices, and they kind of are. It matters how much admin/work culture influences my job, and where I want Felix to go to school. (there is a push that sububrbs would be better for him, I thnk he'd be fine anywhere, he's a good kid).

The short term chaos would be a LOT. (I can do it , it's just a LOT).