#(esp considering how much copied work ends up there lmao)

[saltymongoose]

Hold on- didn’t you make that wattpad book? “This is all real?” Or something like that-

((NOT A REQUEST PEOPLE MISTOOK IT LAST TIME))

Ah, I expected to get a question like this at some point. To make things short: no, I did not make the wattpad book. That would be a repost by someone else, who copied the original hcs found here.

Truthfully, I don't actually even have a wattpad account since I don't like the website all that much. And it's not like the reposter denied that it was copied, or deleted the comment about that, so I guess I can appreciate their honesty to some capacity lmao.

Naturally, I would have much preferred to have clear credit/acknowledgment in the description as I outlined in this post. However, considering how that book on wattpad predated this by a lot (the rb especially) that comment and response count as just enough acknowledgment in my view to make me withhold any legal action that I was considering at the time. And my name was still in the description, even if they said it was "inspired" by me, so I guess that might count for something (even if it wasn't nearly as important to my decision as the comment). ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

So essentially, that book's a repost of my stuff on a website I don't go to. And honestly, I wouldn't have named it that if I posted it there anyway lol. Thanks for the question, though, it gives me a good chance to clarify things. <3

[collieii]

thinking abt how stampede handles wolfwoods introduction compared to other versions, and to me it kind of fails in a way. one of the big things about wolfwood's character is that he's kind right? he's a good person who was forced to be cruel. they show his soft side by having him interact with kids. it plays out a little differently depending on version, but essentially he sees some kids having a rough time and sacrifices smth (money or food) so they can be more comfortable. its esp poignant in trimax where they were literally stealing from him so it would be understandable if he got mad, but he isn't at all. and this follows the scene of him haggling with the driver, so we know for a fact that wolfwood is not in a good place.

meanwhile in stampede, the the kid wolfwood interacts with is zazie? and at the end of the ep its revealed that they know each other, that wolfwood is working with knives, etc. so it just makes that earlier scene look like a setup, at least thats how it seemed to me the first time i watched the ep.

it also feels a little less genuine than the moment wolfwood had with the kids in the other versions, i'm not sure why. maybe it's because the scene goes by too fast. or because of how different wolfwood is in stampede (he’s so much meaner than his past versions!) so the kindness we see here is just. obscured by how bitchy he is in half of his other scenes. if i'm to believe wolfwood is a good guy, i need to see him be good sometimes idk?

vash's comment about him being good in ep 4 is so jarring to me because it feels like he has zero reason to say that. ik it's maybe not supposed to be 'reasonable' since he doesn't even give an actual reason aside from the ~his eyes~ thing which is not logical at all lmao, just based on vibes. and i do sort of trust that vash has good instincts and can tell when a person is trustworthy or not based on vibes. but when i watched it as someone unfamiliar with the original trigun, unaware who wolfwood was, i was confused as to why exactly vash decided to trust wolfwood aside from maybe his general faith in humanity. the nicest thing wolfwood does is give the kid a lollipop which is sweet but in this context it doesn't have the same effect as giving him his money or smth (and as i said the effect is kinda retroactively belied by the fact that its zazie, not some rando he has no connection too). 

to be fair, his intro scene serves other purposes in stampede. we learn about wolfwood's past in the orphanage, which is important to introduce because his arc with livio is addressed later in the season. it also ties into vash's new internal conflict in stampede about eating and self flagellation and stuff. but that ends up being kinda detrimental to the scene too? instead of saying something normal to the kid that makes us go ‘aww hes good with kids!’ it literally just feels like he’s talking to vash, which he would not be because wolfwood has known vash for 5 minutes atp. obviously im not expecting stampede to copy the scene from the manga or 98, but the fact that they included an analogue of it means to me that they're obviously aware of how important it is to wolfwood's character. still, they managed to execute it in a way that sort of fails to communicate something i personally consider fundamental to his character in any version.

[ilkkawhat]

All the numbers. (If not all then pick and choose a handful to answer).

lol you’re really going for it anon, huh?? 😂 bless your heart. I’ll do all of them and then idk. if anybody wants to send any again, I’m sure I can have a different answer

(I did just answer 7 & 22 so I’ll leave those out. rest below the cut)

1) is there a story you’re holding off on writing for some reason?

I guess if you count all of my active WIPs that have been sitting dormant for months or years, there’s those since I like. I know what I’m doing in pretty much all of them, just as I know what I’m doing in some of my unpublished WIPs, but I think I just need to be in a certain mood/energy to do certain ones (ie, Agony esp is a very heavy fic so I gotta be able to Deal with that)

2) what work of yours, if any, are you the most embarrassed about existing?

I deleted those 😂😂😂 but some of my reeeeeealllllly old stuff is still out there and I cringe thinking about that and though I could easily delete those too, I’m keeping them just since the harddrive that has the docs for it is corrupted lol

3) what order do you write in? front of book to back? chronological? favorite scenes first? something else?

Just all over the place these days tbh. Even chapter to chapter it’ll change, I’ll write snippets in future chapters--and I’m talking like three or four chapters ahead--just to get it out there. But then there’s other days where I’ll sit and just write and not stop.

4) favorite character you’ve written

Nick Stokes, of course 💜💜💜

5) character you were most surprised to end up writing

Any of the Macgyver characters outside of Jack. Cause though I’ll claim not to all the time, I do know that I know the CSI characters (though I’m surprised I’m able to write in their POVs outside of Nick.) I grew up with them. I have a bond with them. The mac characters? I’ve only known for like. two years now and not even that well anymore since I’ve stopped watching the show. 

6) something you would go back and change in your writing that it’s too late/complicated to change now

Expanding on details. Almost every fic I write, I’ll read it again later and be like “ah shit I should have run with this idea...” but I guess that’s how I can do a sequel/missing scene

8) favorite genre to write

hurt/comfort (emphasis on the hurt, really I mean we’re talking like borderline horror)

9) what, if anything, do you do for inspiration?

See I haven’t really honed in on any one particular thing that inspires me to write. It comes out of nowhere, and the following list of things doesn’t like, always work. When I’m listening to a song. When I’m driving in the car. When I’m watching something unrelated to the source material (totes got some inspiring vibes watching Falcon and The Winter Soldier yesterday tbh lmao) When I dream. When I go on a walk. When people send me asks and I just go the fuck off and suddenly ten chapters later I’m writing a fic that they probably didn’t even want (coughSpecimenStokescough)

10) write in silence or with background noise? with people or alone?

I think the last couple times I’ve like, really written it’s been in silence. Definitely alone. Don’t got people to write around, really lmao (unless you count my parents being in other rooms with obnoxiously loud televisions and tablets)

11) what aspect of your writing do you think has most improved since you started writing?

All of it. And I’m sure it’ll keep improving.

12) your weaknesses as an author

Dialogue. I don’t know how people talk 😂

13) your strengths as an author

Detail, description, and I also like to think--emotion? but idk. It’s hard for me to assess my strength tbh

14) do you make playlists for your current wips?

Oh YES! At least for the longer WIPs like Last Breath or Agony. And listen to it on a loop when I’m trying to brainstorm or write if I want to write with music on. I’ve been starting to link the playlists when I’m doing with the fic (which is not many so far)

(I think Hellbound is the only one-shot I made a playlist for that I didn’t share)

15) why did you start writing?

I honestly can’t remember, cause I think I’ve been writing stories (fan fiction or not) ever since I was in middle school?? Maybe even elementary? But I do feel like I had gotten more encouragement for it than drawing from the few people in my life that did actively cheer me on, and there’s just something about writing that is so...fulfilling? Esp since I can’t like. Just manifest the images or make the “movie” in my head, at least I can write them down and hopefully convey what I see/feel in my mind through words.

16) are there any characters who haunt you?

All my neglected OCs lmao. I did and I guess on some level still do want to make an original series.

In a chilling way Veronica also haunts me cause I realize how much of that like, darkness in myself I put in her. 

And Nick, well, he’s just always on my mind.

17) if you could give your fledgling author self any advice, what would it be?

Just fucking go for it! Don’t give a shit if anybody will read it or not. Take your time, flesh out those details. Describe what you see, what they see, what they feel. 

If you think you’re going too far...you’re not. 

keep going

18) were there any works you read that affected you so much that it influenced your writing style? what were they?

I mean any fan fiction I read in the past has probably influenced me on some level. I know that when I came back to CSI in 2018, reading all of kristen999′s nick whump def encouraged me cause I was like “oh...there’s others like me who like to see him hurt!?!?” and I do think that maybe sometimes after I read a fic, I might like. Try to incorporate those styles I see. The way words are described, sentences constructed. Not like, copy of course but I feel like a long time ago my writing wasn’t really idk, novel-like? very short, almost read like a script whereas now, since I’ve seen the way people write their stories (some novel length stories, too), I flesh mine out a lot more.

19) when it comes to more complicated narratives, how do you keep track of outlines, characters, development, timeline, ect.?

I don’t 😂 Thinking of my bigger projects like Agony, I do just kind make up some of it as I go with a rough outline although sometimes it is a bit more detailed--like First Flight actually has a super detailed outline but I know that once I start writing, something might come up, some twist I didn’t think of before--or even one that somebody suggests to me, but idk I feel like I do have a way of tying everything together regardless? Cause especially with those bigger WIPs I will try to go back and re-read if something seems familiar or if I’ve forgotten a detail, or if I’m planning on diving back into it after a long break from it. 

20) do you write in long sit-down sessions or in little spurts?

Depends. I feel more accomplished with the long sit down sessions so I target that, but lately it’s been little spurts with maybe one big dump at the end of the week.

21) what do you think when you read over your older work?

Mostly cringe, but there are times I’m like “holy shit this is really good???” 

like I remember recently I re-read Agony and loved it, when I wanted to delete it maybe like. a week before that. I think it honestly depends on my frame of mind, and why I’m going back to read the fic? Cause I’ve had times where I’m like “wait what was this one?” and then I read it and laugh at how bad it is, but then other times where I’m like, “I wanna read that one fic I did...” and then I do and it makes me happy.

But, I will always kinda criticize at the same time--”aw, I could do this better, I could have expanded on this,” etc

23) any obscure life experiences that you feel have helped your writing?

My life is suuuuuuper boring so. not really lmao. One of my earliest CSI fics that actually created what I consider to be my number one OC (she’d be the lead in that original series I mentioned earlier) came out of me sitting and staring into a campfire lmao. 

also there was this teacher I had (one of those good IRL supports) that told me a story of something that happened to her (or was it her daughter?) and I turned it into a story (back in my teen days) so. I guess there are somethings. 

24) have you ever become an expert on something you previously knew nothing about, in order to better a scene or a story?

Expert? No. But I will do numerous google searches to try and figure some stuff out and get lost in a rabbit hole of “research” for a while and hope that when I do write it, it comes off as I know what I’m doing when really, I do not lol.

25) copy/paste a few sentences or a short paragraph that you’re particularly proud of

haven’t really written much in this past week, and certainly nothing to be proud of, but this line hit me like a ton of bricks for Specimen Stokes and I’m in love with it:

“Because, my dear specimen, I wanted to see if you loved the danger...or if you loved me.”

[laughing-with-god]

Yandere BTS as fanboys

Jin- You’re his idol. He strives to be like you. That outfit you were wearing at the airport last week? He bought a matching one. You mentioned your favorite food on a mukbang V-live? He mastered cooking it. That one funny joke you said on that variety show? He repeats it all the time to his friends because it’s just so funny. If someone said that Jin was the male version of you, he’d be so touched to the point of tearing up. You were perfection in human form. Hate to say this, but if anyone dared to say that another girl idol was prettier or more talented than you, he’d definitely bash.

Prone to- Matching selcas and outfits, being a solo stan, going broke to see you in person via concerts and meets, unsubconsciously altering his appearance to fit your ideal type, bashing your ‘competition’

“Irene has no personality whatsoever and looks like an ajumma. You dare compare her to Y/n?!”

Yoongi- Analyzes your lyrics and uses them as inspiration for his own. Quiet fan, says he doesn’t need people to know that he’s a fan of an idol but really he wants to keep you to himself. Listens to your music at least 10 times a day. Helps him cope day to day and will switch to the acoustic versions when he’s trying to fall asleep. He could pick out your voice from a sea of others. He worships it. Doesn’t pay attention to idol culture, but if it involves you he’ll look out. Has a separate account to follow your social media. Has high hopes of one day working with you and creating a masterpiece together. He won’t get mad if someone disses your looks or personality (he kinda prefers it that people don’t find you as desireable as he does so he doesn’t have ‘competition’) but if someone ever came for you music....god help them.

Prone to- Quiet and solo Stan, has you as his background, skips through your members’ voices to get to yours alone, genuinely believes that you two will end up together, doesn’t consider himself a fan rather an appreciator of your music, pushes himself as a producer to one day work with you

“Y/n is so much more than an idol. She’s an artist. She’s so much bigger than Kpop, it’s offensive that she gets compared to the likes of Twice or Gfriend....”

Namjoon- Protective Stan. Dating scandals? He’s the type to get into a rant showing EXACT ANGLES OF YOUR EYELINE to prove that you weren’t lovingly gazing at the other idol. Controversy? The type to send letters to your company, begging them to sue dispatch and other sites for trying to tarnish your name. The type to try to search for deeper meanings with music videos and lyrics in quest for a story or conspiracy. Will copy your pictures for his own social media and have the caption of some deep quote you once said. Considers himself too mature for fan wars but his three paged rants in YouTube/Instagram/tumblr comment sections will tell you otherwise. Dresses like you and even tries to incorporate some of your mannerisms and sayings into his day to day behavior.

Prone to- Copying your social media presence, sending your company LOTS of letters, getting way too heated with other fans who just don’t ‘get’ you like he does, deadass wants to get a tattoo of a quote from you on him.

“Y/n is just a very complex person. I don’t expect you to understand what she meant by *blank* but trust me it wasn’t that. She’s just very philosophical and wise. Your two brain cells wouldn’t understand.”

Hoseok- LOUD stan. Has a YouTube channel for recreating your choreo. Has another YouTube channel for covering your songs. Has another channel for reaction videos of videos concerning you. Posters on his wall, saved selcas in his gallery, all your songs on shuffle and notifications for your social media are on so he won’t miss a thing. Has a proud tally for all the concerts he’s attended. Will happily roast someone online for the sake of fan wars. Will support your group/members as much as he can but at the end of the day you are his ride or die. Merch King. One of the most well known fans, one day your groups’ twitter account retweeted him and he SCREAMED SO LOUD despite being in public.

Prone to- Online stalking, skipping work or school if it interferes with going to your concerts or catching a V-live, going off on a hater and using his platform to protect your image

“Lmao imagine thinking that Y/n gives any types of shit about a weirdo weeabo like you?Talk all the shit you want from behind your crusty keyboard, she’s literally so unbothered💅🏼” *tweet from his fan account bc I picture him being THAT bitch*

Jimin- soft stan. Has a tumblr, wattpad and archive of our own account bc he LIVES for anything that can make him feel like he’s in a love story with you. Fluff, angst, fantasy ect. He’s always seen with his head buried in his phone screen and eyes furiously scanning the latest fic to peak his interest. Has a portable charger bc he cannot risk his phone dying whilst in the climax of a good plot. Not too involved with idol politics but he is very protective of you. Will def notice if you look a tad thinner or tired and type a comment telling you to eat more and rest well. Prob tell your company to lay off if I’m being honest. Supports your group 110% and doesn’t engage in fan wars bc he knows that you wouldn’t approve. The type to tell other frenzied fans online, “what would Y/n think?” Your his ideal type and he strives to be yours, dyes his hair and gets contacts to fit with your type.

Prone to- Obsessing over your well-being, spending too many hours a day reading fics about you (considers making his own), false sense of reality

“I know that Y/n doesn’t deserve this hate but pls don’t go bashing on haters on her behalf. Honestly it makes the fan base look bad and Y/n wouldn’t be proud. Let’s just focus on showing her love to drown out the negative. 💗”

Taehyung- You’re his goddess. Tries to mimic you in every way. Your hair color, your clothes, your accessories, eye colors and even the way you walk or talk. You’re just such an icon to him and so refreshing, he can’t tear his eyes away from you. Every idol is just so boring compared to you. You magnetize him. In his free time he tries to draw you and has honestly gotten so good at it. Another one to try to have a social media theme similar to yours. Got a pet and named it after you. Mimics your style and changes it up whenever you do. Will travel to the places you do, ESP if it’s for a fashion show. Even copies your skincare routine and diet. Follows your accounts but loves your from afar, doesn’t participate in petty fan behavior bc his ego is too big to ever settle for a ‘fan’ title.

Prone to- online stalking and copying, actual stalking, huge ego and warped sense of reality

“Y/n is going to be in Paris next week so I gotta book my flight now. Do you think she’s gonna be at the Gucci or Dior show? I would say Gucci but she never fails to surprise me...”

Jungkook- bby stan. You took his breath away when he first saw your music video. IU who? He watches EVERYTHING with you in it, streams all your music, follows all your accounts and buys all the merch. He strives to be your ideal type. He covers all your music but posts them online without showing his face bc he’s too shy. He used to be a fan war warrior but when he had a lil accident (cough smashing his laptop into a wall when the hater continued to call you a whore cough) he now tries his best not to participate and instead just focus on you alone. He would never admit it, but he’s the type to look up your zodiac sign and his sign to read about how compatible you two are. Doesn’t want to be so obvious as to wear matching outfits as you, but does get small things like the same phone case or necklace as you have. Just to feel closer to you. Would totally go to a fan meet if he knew he wouldn’t have a panic attack being face to face with his soulmate.

Prone to- getting a bit too heated when defending you, ignoring his actual responsibilities to obsess over you, buying small things to feel closer to you, suppressing aspects of his persona that he thinks you wouldn’t like

“Y/n said she liked guys who are laidback. Ugh...am I too practical for her? Maybe I should learn how to go with the flow a bit more. The horoscope did say she was going to have a problem with my Virgo tendencies....”

[icharchivist]

Just realized. Lucifer and Lucio having the same taste in sandy and how they become more human? (Not sure how to put it) around him makes sense when you consider how Lucifer was supposed to complete lucillius, who is a copy of lucio. So yeah, sandy makes a less creepy lucio.

oooh omg good point

i do think in an ironic way the whole Lucio>Lucilius>Lucifer>Sandalphon line showcase very well the whole theme of evolution 

There’s still questions about why the Helels got clones to start with, but it is interesting to me considering Lucio has, for most of his life, lived as a Speaker, an unactive player, a Watcher for a Silent God. If i remember 000 correctly, Lucio event comments a lot on how impressed he is with the way his Clone evolved past some restrictions. 

By joining the crew Lucio already started to question his purpose and started to take steps in order to evolve as well, this whole theme of him going on about how humanity is weak (observation as an unactive player) but yet this weakness makes them stronger than the perfect being (leading him to become an active player to heelp into this endeavor). 

So yeah esp with the whole Helel Reverie quest Lucio has exposed a lot about how he lived for thousands years at least, if not millenials, which was a stagnant extention and tool for a god, to now deciding to act for himself.

And the whole decision to act for himself came from the Crew yes but i doubt it would have come this far had it not been for Lucilius and the plans he set in motions.

While it focuses more on Lucio and Lucifer, a slight detour on Lucilius, we have here a clone who had always felt himself incomplete. Both him and Bubs have some sort of Gods complex and Lucilius esp was an outcast, and it’s to be argued this is because of the fact they are clones. Lucilius mentions having had vague memories of the Tower Lucio is found in, so that by essence Lucilius is connected to a side of Lucio, but by being unable to reason this part of him for such a long time, it had just led him to feel more isolated among his peers, and led to his God complex.

We know from last quest also that Lucilius’s body at least was weaker than his mind could be and that it’s one of the reason he created Lucifer as an extension of himself, more than a perfected one. Like you said, Lucifer was meant to complete Lucilius.

But by trusting him with evolution, setting him with this purpose as well as to watch over it, letting Lucifer call him “my friend”, encouraging Lucifer to take his own decisions ect. Everything led to Lucifer to watch, to question the world. He didn’t have to worry about where he came from like Lucilius did, so he focused on his purpose.

And ultimately, this is this evolution that Lucifer watched over and kept questioning that led him to be more human. Lucifer was watching toward the present, toward the future, was, by design, looking over others people (i suspect that with the reason he was created it’s also not unlikely Lucilius counted on the “more powerful version of himself” to also watch over him in case Lucilius was in a bind).

The Loophole ended that by the fact Lucifer’s purpose was evolution and that he had no reason to question further than that, he evolved. Unlike Lucio that cut himself from the skyrealm for a long time, Lucifer let himself pay attention to it, learn from it.

And then we have Sandalphon which imo works as a mix of Lucilius and Lucifer in the sense that, the lack of purpose made Sandalphon constantly question why he was made. He snapped the moment he learnt he was meant as a remplacement - a clone - to the person he loved, but, on top of that, that he would not be needed anyway. 

It parallels pretty nicely with Lucilius in the sense that, Lucilius didnt know most of his life that he was a clone and it tormented him enough to be constantly questioning it and taking questionable decision as he questioned his existence. Sandalphon spent most of his life not knowing his purpose but it tormented him, and just like Lucilius, he started to take questionable decisions as he questioned the purpose of his exitence.

While Sandalphon did end up filling his original purpose to remplace Lucifer, he is much more influenced by this time he lacked purpose which is pretty big for a Primal. While chaotic, Sandalphon took his own first few steps into deviating from the path made for him out of pure spite, which is a sort of evolution by its own rights. And Lucifer’s death and passing his purpose on Sandalphon just led Sandalphon to question more in general. (also ironical since Sandalphon did inherit Lucifer’s memories, so like Lucilius, he had flashes of another life, but unlike Lucilius, he knew where it came from and could reason with them to put them in perspective as knowledge, rather than questions about his existence.)

And finally, while Lucio had joined the crew of the Singularity earlier (but idk the details as of why so i really base my interpretation more on 000), Lucilius last attempt to overthrow God, as well as Sandalphon arriving and living up to all this experience that Lucifer passed over, was probably the showdown Lucio needed: 

on one hand, Lucilius was stuck in the conflicted feelings about his own existence, stuck in trying to understand what he’s even evolving from since he doesn’t know, and that perhaps this is why he was meant for higher things. On the other, Sandalphon, while still struck with grief and unsure exactly how to fill his goal, has evolved and has been more certain about the way to exercise what he wants to do further than his own purpose.

That showdown that we know Lucio saw (even if Lucilius had left him in a poodle of blood at this point) was imo the one argument needed for Lucio in term of Getting Stuck In The Past VS Allowing Yourself To Change.

So, undeniably, while Lucio probably started to change already because of the Singularity, i think it’s Sandalphon, being the last in his clone’s line, and coming right after Lucilius that was the first one, that really struck a point about what it means to evolve past your purpose, and past the issues that had risen on your way.

And like Lucifer kept asking himself question as he watched over people (and arguably the whole thing with his last words that he applies to “people” can just as well be applied to how he understood Sandalphon in the end, “anger when denied” thing. Not to mention that Lucifer had been wondering about Sandalphon’s feelings since the Rebellion without coming up with an answer and seeing where that led, so reflection, thanks to Sandalphon, was essential for Lucifer), Lucio saw those actions, saw this evolution coming from his line, and decided just as much to observe, but also to become an active player in questioning, and in acting when time comes (ie destroying the Pandemonium).

So yeah dLFJDLF this was a whole word vomit but i do find it exteremely interesting because, yeah, Lucio being the first in the line really showcase how much each member of the line led to the next one evolving, up to the point that when all of this was reunited in the Tower (since, while Lucifer was dead, we also see Sandalphon constantly bringing up Lucifer’s way of thinking, plus ofc the Lucifer that appear behind Sandalphon when he uses Paradise Lost), when all four of them were together in one place, i think it served as a way to reflect on what was, what is and what could be for Lucio. He saw the different path taken by his own line, how slight different circumstances changed one self,

and, of course, Sandalphon, who was meant to stay quietly in his place as a spare, constantly taking his destiny in his own hands, and working through both his new found purpose and who he decide to be for himself, as well as his role for the rest of the world. 

Sandalphon’s existence was enough as of which for Lucifer to be more at peace and be more himself rather than the Supreme Primarch. By his relationship with Sandalphon, Lucifer was allowed to act outside of his purpose and imo, this is what gave him the insight he needed to question once he lost Sandalphon to Sandalphon’s free will in the Rebellion. 

I think Lucio is coming at it from the backward perspective of seeing where Sandalphon is now after taking conscious steps to justify his existance, despite seemingly having to fit Lucio’s steps. 

Hell i wonder how much of “Lucilius was close to God” and “Lucifer served as much as he could” was stuff Lucio could relate to for both of them. Then Lucifer rebelled against his own master when he went too far. I wonder if Lucio didn’t project a minute and wondered if he could do that, too, if needed. And probably that could be realization enough for Lucio that he has to change.

but this is whole set in motion because Sandalphon took his own path, and is the one in the Tower for making the point about Evolution as it is.

So in a purely thematic standpoint this is evolution in action leading to question, over and over and Lucio could take all of this into account when all this evoltion came barging at his door lmao.

But also yeah, the idea is also possible that Lucio would have been the OG attracted to Sandalphon idea and that this self spliting gave Lucilius his brain and Lucifer his heart enough to like Sandalphon tadaaaa o/

also technically me saying “that was a word vomit” was to bring to a conclusion but then i got into even more details i’m so sorry dKLJFDF i really find this fascinating and Lucio is especially set on a character journey i find interesting because he is doing so after having observed how people from his cloneline has decided to take actions. And from that Lucio can just learn to move on past being a Speaker, and act by himself. Inspired by Sandalphon. Which is in himself the current conclusion to line of questioning that spread throught the whole LuciLines.

anyway wmtsb good.

Thanks for coming in to mention it! and Thanks for reading through it all if you did DLKJFD

Take care!!

[nonbinarysasukes]

hokage!kushina au

minato rejected being hokage bc he knew his fiance had always wanted it, and bc he knew she had better leadership skills, so he recommended her for the post instead. and when the new hokage was announced as kushina uzumaki, kushina didn’t cry (minato did though). she squealed and hugged minato, then calmed herself down saying, “a hokage has to be cool and composed-ttebane!”

because of kushina’s smart thinking to put mikoto and fugaku on watch while she’s birthing, kurama is held back and sealed into her once more after naruto is born. minato and kushina raise their son into a wonderful (gay) boy. kushina and her bff mikoto find out abt danzo and have him sentenced to death. the members of root, including the children, are freed. 

kushina also abolishes the shitty team setup of “two boys one girl” and starts failing the incompetent boys and passing more girls instead. women’s rights in konoha have never been this good. more than half the anbu is now the women who never got a chance to fight bc of konoha’s elitist system. mikoto is promoted to captain like she should have been so many years ago.

kushina outlaws the hyuuga branch system to much outrage which thankfully calms down soon enough. hinata is never kidnapped bc konoha’s guards aren’t negligent. as a result, hizashi never dies, and he and neji are treated fairly. neji, hinata and hanabi grow up like siblings. hinata grows out of her stuttering habit and becomes a calm, mature young ninja. hanabi is the same bright, talented firework who goes on to lead the hyuuga. neji settles down with lee and gaara as an anbu of konoha many years later.

team gai remains the same, with their wholesome dynamic. neji plays along with lee’s rivalry, all the while hiding his huge crush on lee. tenten just smirks at them the whole time.

tenten gets to study under kushina - surprisingly the uzumaki clan also has a history of weapons. tenten falls in love immediately. she and temari draw in the chuunin exams and tenten gets enough courage to ask her out. they get married after steadily dating for five years straight. temari is the kazekage, so they get to meet on political missions (which end up being just makeout sessions but no one needs to know)

team 8 have kurenai sensei, as usual. she’s not with asuma bc he’s a creep but dates shizune instead. kibahinashino is a thing ok?! hinata is the team leader no questions asked. kiba and shino work amazingly well with her and they all lead feminist rallies together. kurenai has fun with her kids.

anko gets actual. fucking. therapy. kushina lets her nuke oro***maru herself. jiraiya is given a proper dressing-down for his perverted and irresponsible behavior and reforms himself. he takes an active interest in helping orphans and starts tons of orphanages. tsunade returns to konoha eventually and is also given a right scolding by rin and kushina. shizune joins in too.

kakashi, who moved in with kushina and minato not long after obito’s “death”, grows up as naruto’s big bro/uncle of sorts. rin grows to become a strong medic-nin, even learning from tsunade, and is easily able to fight off her kidnappers with a few punches, thus staying alive. obito never finds rin’s body and soon realises madara’s intents, managing to kill him while he’s asleep and running home to konoha where he reunites with his team. obito is fully pardoned by kushina, who gives him a huge hug as she announces his pardoning. minato cries.

there’s no uchiha coup bc they saved the whole damn village and are now respected and well loved. the uchihas also show their warmer side to konoha, which endears them further. fugaku retires from ninja work bc he’s Stressed TM and becomes a househusband. mikoto’s cool enough for both of them anyway, he reasons.

kakashi retires from ninja-ing at 20 and starts dating gai, whom obito sets him up with. rin and obito become the closest of friends but never get together bc obito gets over his puppy crush and rin’s aro. yamato adopts shin and sai, and obito and yamato start dating. 

naruto, sasuke and sakura are still put on the same team with yamato as a sensei, but naruto and sasuke grow up as really close friends. sakura never has a rivalry with ino bc sasuke’s always goofing around with naruto and doesn’t come off as ‘cool’ and ‘crushable’ - though he does grow into his coolness later lmao - and sakura later starts dating ino. (sasuke and naruto and sai set them up.)

team 7 are the BEST of friends, and when sai is added to the team (having had to undergo therapy to reverse root’s brainwashing) he fits in perfectly. he and sasuke have fun making dick jokes. naruto and sakura just face-palm at the two.

naruto’s still a bit of a goof and quite awkward, but he doesn’t have such a problem with chakra as he used to. he’s also talented with sealing, having been taught by kushina personally! he’s all-round average as he doesn’t have much stamina, but a brave shinobi. when he is fourteen he’s made the jinchuriki in an official ceremony.

sasuke pretends he can control naruto through his sharingan and scares him for nearly a month before revealing he’s joking. naruto was so mad (esp bc kushina and minato played along, like of COURSE)

sakura learns from rin rather than tsunade, who turns out to be a wayyyy better role model. she learns a lot about being a medic-nin and even develops her own style of taijutsu - blossom fist, which relies on strong and super-fast attacks by focusing on making the chakra overflow in an opponent’s bones, essentially breaking them. sakura also spends a lot of time with sasuke, both training their genjutsu together.

sasuke awakens his sharingan when he is twelve and itachi comes home half-dead from a mission. he turns out to be extremely talented with the doujutsu, perhaps more so than any member of his clan. itachi teaches him swordplay as well. sasuke also hones his lightning ability and, having never relied on the mangekyou, becomes a master of the regular ability of the sharingan. he receives training from kakashi and becomes almost as good a copy-nin as him.

tenten becomes hokage soon after kushina. sakura is her right-hand. sasuke and naruto are joint anbu captains (minato and fugaku are so proud). kushina officiates sakura and ino’s wedding. everyone’s actually happy.

kushina is regarded as konoha’s strongest hokage until tenten. she and tenten are considered to be on the same level. they’re even called “the twin queens” across the five shinobi countries.

anyway thank you for coming to my ted talk lol ik this got long but i wanted everyone and sadly i couldn’t have the akatsuki and everybody bc let’s be real how much can i type? i might put it in a part 2 tho!

[janiedean]

(1) Can I just say I hate all this Freddie Mercury biopic wank with a passion? Like, this hellsite went from "Queen is one of those boring 'classic' bands all whites are obsessed with bc they won't even consider new music by diverse artists u.u" to "WWRY is clearly a song about rebellious queer youth, cishets don't touch Queen u.u" after someone pointed out Freddie's ethnicity and sexuality, to "why aren't they making Freddie gay in the biopic!!!11" and... whatever they're whining about now.

(2) And I HATE looking at all this bs and thinking "fake fans", bc I'm pretty damn sure that by most standards, *I* count as a "fake fan", too. I mean, most stuff I know about the band's history is actually stuff about Freddie, thanks to a few documentaries centered around him and my mom, the long-time fan with a big crush on Freddie who introduced me to Queen when I was a kid. Hell, I couldn't even name all their albums or anything needed to be considered a "true fan". But ppl on here... ugh. (3) It's like they're really embarrassed bc they were called out on mistaking "woke" stuff for "unwoke" stuff, and now they have this desperate need to prove their ability to discern wokeness by getting offended about something they don't even care all that much about, as loudly and dramatically as they can.

HAHAHAHAHA.

okay so, tldr: I hate this discourse and I honestly hope that it dies within two weeks out of the biopic for a whole lot of reasons amongst which the ones you said, but like, this discourse actually highlights a shitload of issues with the usual tumblr discourse which I will gladly go into now because I’m fucking tired and this movie isn’t out yet.

now, premise: while I don’t think that true fans are a thing - at most there’s casual fans or in-depth fans but I mean, a fan is a fan so I don’t believe in the *fake* fans thing..... the problem here isn’t that they’re fakes. it’s that they aren’t fans. period.

other premise: from what you’ve said you’re a casual fan which is normal and you DON’T count as fake I mean if you like them and listen to them and know something it’s basically being a casual fan same as I am with idk the rolling stones, I like the famous stuff, I have the fundamental records and I like them when they’re on but that’s it.

but, yours truly is a Not Casual Queen Fan in the sense that a) I got into them when I was seventeen and I’m thirty now so thanks it’s been a while, b) I own all the records, c) I own a decent portion of roger taylor’s/brian may’s solo records (and I have listened to all of them that I couldn’t buy), d) I went to see them live once (k it was with paul rodgers but nvm guys not my fault if I wasn’t born in time for freddie) and I love queen’s music and I’m also fucking cishet and you know what? these people Are Not Fans and they should stop pretending they are and just stop making themselves look like assholes.

SPECIFICALLY:

the movie’s not out yet and I’ve had to see FIFTEEN ‘FRIENDLY REMINDER TO ALL CISHETS THAT FREDDIE MERCURY WAS GAY (at least a couple said he was bi and they were less asshole-ish) AND POC AND IF YOU DON’T KNOW YOU’D BETTER LEARN NOW HAHAHAHA YOU THOUGHT HE WASN’T. spoilers: every fucking casual queen fan who has bothered to buy three records knows that. yes, also the cishets. like, as someone who went from VERY CASUAL (ie: I know three songs) to NOT CASUAL in the span of two months I can 100% assure you that before getting into queen the usual preconceptions are that freddie was gay and that queen = freddie + three other people. the first three things you learn when getting into queen are (more or less in order but it can change) that a) the band was actually brian may + roger taylor first, b) that roger brought freddie in because they knew each other already, c) that mary austin was a fundamental person in freddie’s life and that she was also brian may’s ex and knew him first before they got together, d) the members’s backstories including where freddie was born, so like...... this idea that CASUAL CISHET FANS wouldn’t know that freddie was a) not heterosexual, b) poc is just something a NON-FAN would say because guess what, most queen fans even at a casual level are 100% aware that freddie was a) not heterosexual, b) not ethnical british. and saying that OMG CISHETS DON’T KNOW it’s ridiculous because guess what, everyone knows and if they have no idea they do, though luck, we did;

(spoilers: I also am 99% sure that those ppl have no idea that roger and brian actually sing on the records and composed a shitload of the music and queen =/= ONLY FREDDIE but okay)

they have no idea that rock music in the 70s/80s was not so heteronormative and was not the cishetmalething they think it is. like, please look at led zeppelin (ie THE PEOPLE WITHOUT WHOM YOU WOULDN’T HAVE HEAVY METAL) and tell me they were heteronormative. like, you saw robert plant? yeah, me too. and the thing was that queen were revolutionary in the sense that they brought an operatic/theatrical approach to the music that no one tried before but guess what, the point is that they made it sell. the thing that I would like tumblr Woke People to grasp is that what made queen groundbreaking as far as Wokeness goes is that they managed to sell and become the monster-moneymaking group they were (while keeping things quality) with a frontman who was Not Heterosexual, Did Not Try To Pass For Heterosexual One Day In His Life and Never Shied Away From It. like, idk if people are aware that while the scene was way less heteronormative than they think it still wasn’t the most openly talked about topic around (I mean guys elton john did marry a woman at some point X°DDD), but going around in the seventies flaunting your non-heterosexualness around and selling millions of copies making your stage persona a selling point of your music wasn’t exactly common. like ffs one of the most famous queen songs has a video where for 3/4 of the time they’re in drag and the other part has freddie performing with the royal ballet (and guess what the song was actually written by john deacon and the idea of doing the video in drag was roger taylor’s and none of them as far as we know is Not Heterosexual, but never mind giving the rest of the band some credit when it came to Not Caring About Heteronormativity) and fine, that video was banned/controversial, but it still was a huge british hit and it’s in the top five queen songs Everyone Knows. and tbh I’m terrified of that video being shown in the biopic (which it should since the works was from ‘84 and they stop at ‘85) because I’m 100% sure that those people have no idea it exists and when they find out how long is it gonna take them to decide that IT’S PROBLEMATIC? I mean, Woke Kids on here think the rhps is problematic, I’m shuddering at the thought of what they’d think of the i want to break free video;

actually a lot of us cishet queen fans might have had a wake up call including, er, finding out certain preferences, thanks to either their music or their shows or their videos (*cough* I 100% assure you that watching roger taylor in drag was what made me realize crossdressing was my thing for good like I knew before but I didn’t actually put two and two together until I saw that video and went like ‘............. AH WELL SHIT THEN THAT’S IT FAIR ENOUGH’), and a lot of us cishet queen fans who weren’t, like, strictly playing to heteronormative rules back in the day found a lot to relate to in their music even without being queer ourselves and guess what I’ve never met a single queen *fan* who could give less of a damn about freddie’s ethnicity or orientation (as in: everyone was a-okay with it) regardless of their background. that was what made them groundbreaking and extremely important as well, because they managed to be that kind of record-selling records-breaking band while not shying away from having a Not Heterosexual frontman AND Not Heteronormative Heterosexual Band Members Who Also Didn’t Give Two Fucks About Their Lead Singer’s Sexuality so going like OMG NOW WE’RE GONNA TEACH YOU THAT FREDDIE WASN’T HETEROSEXUAL BECAUSE WE’RE WOKE is ridiculous because dearest susan, we already knew and we already were woke about that and to us he was the frontman of a band we liked for a bunch of reasons;

also I don’t think people realize that freddie was a role model/example for the entire next generation of rock bands frontmen even in genres that had zilch to do with him - I mean guys AXL ROSE had a hero-worship for freddie and sang bohemian rhapsody at the freddie memorial concert WITH ELTON JOHN and grn really aren’t the same exact sphere as queen jsyk, but if you look at axl on stage esp. when he was younger? guys. it’s obvious. like you can see the influence. but lmao, now ALL the very cishet(-ish) singers who OPENLY SAID FREDDIE INFLUENCED THEM DIDN’T KNOW ACCORDING TO TUMBLR DOT COM?

LIKE, fuck’s sake, one of freddie’s major accomplishments in that sense was to ending up being a role model for younger singers in a genre where heteronormativity is way less common than everyone thinks BUT where not many people esp. back in the day would be open about their sexuality because it still was a taboo-ish thing -- like, gender roles were a lot more blurred but you wouldn’t hear many of those people admitting openly they were bi or gay or Not Heterosexual and the entirety of the rock scene especially mainstream but also not was entirely fucking aware of it, do these people think THE FANS wouldn’t?

also, we will rock you was WRITTEN BY BRIAN MAY AND IT WAS ABOUT A FUCKING ENCORE WHERE THE FANS SURPRISED THEM AT ONE SHOW IN LIKE MID-SEVENTIES which already shows that They Know Nothing because if they think freddie wrote all the queen songs then it’s already obvious they have no fucking clue about how queen worked as a band because all the members contributed something (guys john deacon wrote at least two of their major hits, roger taylor sang on all the records along with brian may and if you hear the back harmonies on ‘39 he goes way higher than freddie and a part in seaside rendezvous has both him and freddie mimicking other instruments with their voice and you wouldn’t know if no one told you first, brian may wrote a SHITLOAD of music for queen and it was an all-four effort, not just freddie + three other generic british dudes for fuck’s sake) so like, anyone saying that is already giving ample proof that they have no idea;

now of course you can interpret it as whatever the hell you want, but assuming that all of queen’s music that might relate to queer issues was written by freddie ABOUT QUEER ISSUES (this when freddie’s main topic of interest was... not really discussing his sexuality especially in the seventies like again, I want to break free is one of the queen to-go songs everyone brings up when it comes to that topic and IT WAS WRITTEN BY SOMEONE ELSE and the video concept was THANKS TO SOMEONE ELSE) just shows that a) you don’t know shit about the band’s history, b) you’re not a fan because you didn’t even bother to look it up on wiki, c) you’re trying to look woke at all costs;

they have NO FUCKING CLUE that most people in the 70s/80s/90s in the business were NOT politically correct according to their standards LIKE LITERALLY NO ONE WAS;

goes unsaid they probably haven’t listened to one full queen album from beginning to end not even the greatest hits.

tldr: I hate that they don’t seem to realize that things existed before 2005 and that music in the 70s/80s COULD and WAS diverse and *woke* already before they were even born, I hate that they decided that ALL CISHETS DIDN’T KNOW when thank you I think even my damned parents know and they don’t listen to rock music, I hate that they decided that queen APPARENTLY DIDN’T HAVE A FANBASE BEFORE THEM (lol) or that that fanbase didn’t understand them (triple-lol), I hate that they’re reducing freddie to his sexuality when he didn’t want that in the first place, I hate that they’re falling into THE MAIN MISCONCEPTION AROUND ABOUT THIS BAND as in THAT IT WAS FREDDIE + THREE OTHER PEOPLE and not an all-around group effort of people who were friends and deeply loved/respected each other and put the same share of work into it, I hate that they moment they see the movie and are introduced to the actual music/the actual story they’ll MOST LIKELY find problematic things to wank about because like hell they wouldn’t and I hate that they’re basically pretending to give a fuck about a band that I love and have loved dearly in a very non-casual way when they actually fucking don’t.

fucking hell please never let anyone make a biopic about either springsteen or led zeppelin or other people I actually like because this is bad enough, I don’t even want to think of what tumblr ppl would say if they knew anything about any rock artist of medium-large fame back in the day. peace.

[lunebinnie]

(1/11)Oh my gosh yesss I'm glad that you like long messages too because I talk way too much 😂 (And yeah about my friend and just hanging out w/ her more that's exactly what I was thinking 😂) It's actually kind of funny bc just yesterday I was hanging out at her house and her younger brother needed to go to Walmart and I was like 'I've been meaning to go to Walmart, I'll take you' and ofc since I have a bluetooth radio adapter the whole drive I had my Spotify going with some quality k-bops, lol

2)And as we were driving I noticed him kind of jamming and I was like 'Oh my god Mickey do you actually like this???' And he was Like 'yeah, these are some good bops 👍' I was shooketh. I had to go home before I had the chance to show him any music videos but he says he's open to watching some with me next time I see him. One way or another I'm going to turn someone in my social circle into a kpop fan you mark my words ☝ and then maybe we can team up and try to work on his sister some more 😂

3)I only started first getting into kpop last June so I'm still very new, but it's definitely super frustrating how so many ppl act like it's an inherently bad or cringey genre of music just bc it's kpop! The stigma is ridiculous! I also started out with BTS (lol) and since they're pretty popular in the US at least I was able to be like 'See, this isn't just a niche thing, lots of people know abt and like this group' but of course my dad still says 'Just cause it's popular doesn't make it good'

4)And I'm like? You're a band teacher, you of all people should understand that music doesn't have to be in your native language (or even have lyrics) in order for you to enjoy it, but go off I guess... It's the same with one of my college friends. They make fun of me for liking kpop but this is coming from some who still treats March 22nd (the day My Chemical Romance broke up) as a day of mourning. Like, no tea no shade no pink lemonade, MCR was a good band nothing wrong with liking them.

5)But like if you're 22 and you still haven't grown out of your emo phase do you really have room to pick on other people for their music taste?  🤷 Anyway that's the person who follows my main that I didn't want to know I had a kpop sb. I think I made it around July. Tbh it was pretty dead for most of 2018. But like I said I've started using it way more since I recently revealed that it exists, lol. Especially since that good good Astro cb 👏💗😩 But honestly Astro is such a blessing

6)Idk how I lived so long w/o them. When I first got into kpop I was planning on just sticking to BTS since the reaction to me being into kpop was so volatile. I was like 'I'm only into one group, ppl already are negative about me liking kpop so I'm just gonna stick to this and not become a full on multifandom fan' and then in Nov I accidentally let myself fall in love with Monsta X and that plan was foiled. And realizing I wasn't gonna be able to stick to just one anymore opened the floodgates

7)And I was like okay in that case, let's just start getting into *all groups* Lol. My story of getting into Astro was actually bc of my best friend's roommate (can you tell I have like one friend and my whole social circle kinda revolves around her? Lol) so this roommate when she heard me being sad about having no kpop friends was like 'oh hey, I'm kinda into kpop' and it turns out she didn't like very many groups and was one of the ppl who blah blah BTS is overrated, which ya know isn't ideal8)But I was just really desperate to have someone to talk about kpop with. And Astro was her favorite so I was like, okay I'll get into them so that I have something to talk about with her! So I started watching some videos and I fell in love with them pretty much instantly! And I was real excited bc #1 now I can talk about kpop with someone! And #2 this group is actually amazing? Bonus! ... And then they got in a big fight about their living conditions and the roommate ended up moving out RIP

9)So that didn't work out, lol (Your story about finding them during that internship sounds amazing though! Haha) But yeah, so this is my first cb too! And although I love them w/ my whole heart and would have loved to have them in my life even sooner what an amazing cb to be your first! The concept was wonderful, the album was excellent, the visuals were to *die* for. They worked so hard and I'm so proud of them and I'm so happy we got to see their work come to fruition and get them a win 🤧🤧

10)The dance practices though? You're so right omg 💗 Me and my Rocky bias *fully* understand 😂 All of them are such good dancers?? I never fail to be impressed. Of course you know who I always end up watching tho 👀 lol (̶i̶f̶ ̶I̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶h̶a̶l̶f̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶p̶r̶e̶t̶t̶y̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶R̶o̶c̶k̶y̶'̶s̶ ̶f̶o̶o̶t̶w̶o̶r̶k̶ ̶I̶ ̶w̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶a̶l̶m̶o̶s̶t̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶p̶r̶e̶t̶t̶y̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶e̶y̶e̶s̶.̶.̶.̶)̶ ̶ I also love how at the end they always pause all dramatic for a minute and then start screaming 😂

11)It's like? Amazing talent *and* dorky personalities? What more could you ask for? Lol. In regard to your last question though Unfortunately I also won't be able to see them 😔 I live in the smack middle of the US and since they're only going to coasts all of the venues are way too far away to get to. Esp since it's the school year and I can't skip class to drive cross country for a concert much as I'd like to (Holy lord I talked over twice as much?? Why am I like this?) Talk again soon! -ASA

Okay SO I’m very sorry I haven’t had the time to answer everything until now bc I’ve been busy studying for midterms and also I was a lil trashy today since my uni closed bc of freezing rain so I slept in but I’m glad that FINALLY everything got sent like damn tumblr you really don’t want us making friends huh. 

Yessssss I love the feeling of seeing someone else also get into the same interests! I’ve been pretty lucky in the sense that I grew up around mostly other asian americans, so kpop was never something that was considered super “weird,” like some people were into it and some weren’t but even if you weren’t you still would’ve been familiar with the more popular groups from when you were younger. Even now, I have a bunch of friends also into kpop (one of them is even my roommate) so tbh I was definitely the one in my friend group late to the party aha. Even my university hosts kpop nights at our bar and I’m pretty sure we have a kpop dance team as well? So tbh if I met someone new there’s probably like a 50% chance they’re into kpop or at least listen casually. 

Tbh I used to be a little bit judgy too but moreso because of the obscene amount of money I’ve seen some of my friends spend (no joke one of my friends has spent probably like $500+ on Loona stuff in the past month and a half and another friend bought like 5 copies of the same album for herself like damn idk how do you have that much money).

I also really don’t like it when people bash other people’s music tastes, since I feel like it’s something so personal? Idk but for a long time I used to be really self conscious about sharing my music with other people and even now I feel like that sometimes. For me after getting into BTS I kind of expected to get really into other groups since I was in Korea anyway and I was already listening to a lot of other artists casually. For me it started with NU’EST (fell for them immediately at the same concert that I saw Astro at) and then after was Astro, and then I just started slowly getting into other groups after that (even though I haven’t totally been able to get into Got7′s music they’re SO funny and I just kinda fell for their personalities  you know). 

I honestly think that they did such a wonderful job with this comeback too! I like seeing their concept evolve and mature but they’re not straying too far from their original cute concept so I feel like it’s a nice middle ground that’s very unique to them, you feel? Also I feel like the visuals especially and the execution of the whole plant concept was just done so well?? Even my friend who’s not in kpop was like “k idk who they are but that was the prettiest music video I’ve ever seen”. What are your favourite eras and songs? For me I’d have to say either the Spring Up or Baby era BUT right now my favourite song is probably Again/Should’ve Held On though tbh my mood and my tastes change like every few weeks loool. 

I have no idea why I tend to be most attracted to the dances rather than vocals or rap (maybe has to do with the fact that it’s something I’ve always wished I could do but have always been bad at lmao). But Astro’s stood out to me for the exact same reason! I just thought it was so funny seeing them all break character at the end because you really get to see how hard their choreos are and you get a glimpse of their personalities like damn, how can you not stan these dummies?

That’s really unfortunate that you won’t get to see them either :/ They’re also coming to the closest city to me but it’s on a Tuesday, but I *hypothetically* looked up flight prices and tried to see if I could get away with just missing a day of classes if I flew back in the middle of the night since I have some friends who did the same thing and drove down to Buffalo but I seem to have underestimated the size of New York State LMAO. But apparently my university’s too far from the airport so it’s “not realistic” (and also I’m hella broke from travelling to Taiwan and Japan while I was in Korea but that’s a minor issue ig). I hope we do both get a chance to see them live though! Who knows, after the success of this comeback I’m expecting a lot more cbs and world tours out of them ;)

[lambdaorionis]

some thoughts about the goldfinch

the first trailer was what got me curious about it so i was planning to watch it before reading the book, but they ended up delaying the release in my country (and eventually cancelling it) bc it didnt do well in the states, so i read the book last week and watched the movie last night what i liked the most about the book: -read a post the other day about the importance of love being at the core of stories (not necessarily romantic love) and i agree, and obviously theo’s love for the people in his life is important in the book, but what i liked the most is his love for art. this book felt like a love letter to art, and it didn’t feel too cheesy or pretentious, it just felt warm and homey.  i really enjoyed the part when he spoke about antiques and furniture and restoring, which doesn’t surprise me bc i love old things and i’m a very sentimental hoarder, so even though i’m not an expert on chairs and chests and stuff like that, i grew quite fond and curious of it same goes for paintings, i mean i did study some of that stuff but i’m no art expert, anyways i def got some paintings i latched on to in a weird and inexplicable way  (“—if a painting really works down in your heart and changes the way you see, and think, and feel, you don’t think, ‘oh, I love this picture because it’s universal.’ ‘I love this painting because it speaks to all mankind.’ That’s not the reason anyone loves a piece of art. It’s a secret whisper from an alleyway. Psst, you. Hey kid. Yes you.”) music had a minor part compared to paintings and antiques, which makes sense considering it was more pippa’s thing (and part of what connected theo to her), but it was mentioned a bit with boris and his mom too and i liked that

-what theo says vs what he shows us i read some (book) reviews when i was still reading the book, and i dont get why people take everything he says as The Truth. Even if you don’t assume he’s an unreliable narrator from the beginning, it’s obvious when you’re halfway through the book.  What he says about drugs: he’s an addict but it’s different from other addicts, he could easily stop if he really wanted to, he has a whole plan on how to get through withdrawal and get clean, it’s under control What he shows us: he ODed, had a few close calls (which he underplays, but who knows?), when something goes wrong or when he’s bored and needs to get by he goes right back to it, he can’t stay clean for long What he says about Pippa: they’re perfect for each other, he’s the only one who really knows her and loves her for who she is What he shows us: most of what he knows of her he learned through Hobie, they’re awkward around each other, he loves the idea he has of her etc So it baffles me reading reviews about Theo and Pippa’s relationship being the center of the story. It’s important, but it doesn’t outshine his relationship with Hobie, Boris, his mom, or the Barbours. If you really had to pick the core one obvious choice could be the painting. To me it feels more like a good balance between the painting on one side and the people in his life on the other.  When it comes to the painting we see more of who he is (guilt, anger, depression, ...) When it comes to the people we see more of who he wants to be (part of the family with the Barbours, belonging and being family with Hobie (but also indispensable business partner, bc if he isn’t that he feels like he doesn’t deserve to stay with him), true love for Pippa) About Boris I’m a bit torn: there are some moments (esp when he’s a kid) when I feel like he tries to be something with him too (cool friend, always down to try new drugs and drink). Other moments I think he’s himself with Boris. Like when Boris tells him later Theo’s a blackout drunk, and about all the crazy stuff he did like jumping from the roof or trying to set the house on fire. I wonder if Boris brings that out of him or if it’s just that he doesn’t have to pretend when he’s with Boris. I’m leaning more towards the latter, but it’s not just Boris. It’s Boris and the drugs and drinking. You can’t really separate it. We see adult Theo who gets drugs to get through social meetings and interactions and life in general. And then we see drugged Theo with Boris, which is different. And it’s hard to remember any scene where Theo is with Boris and is sober. So there’s that. Even if you try to see the good parts of Theo and Boris’ relationship, there will always be drugs and alcohol and self destruction.  What I didn’t like about the movie:

I read some stuff about the director and his view on the story, I don’t really agree with him about it but it doesn’t matter because tbh there’s a bit of a gap between what he wanted to convey and what I saw. IMO if you take every single scene separately there’s nothing wrong with it, the cinematography is cool and the actors are ok. But the movie as a whole was patched, like they filmed every single scene from the book and then had to cut out stuff to make it 2 hours long, and tried to glue together what was left.  The low ratings from critics didn’t faze me, I know sometimes they praise and hail movies I hated, or criticize movies I liked. The difference between critics and audience scores + the really low score on rotten tomatoes (I mean...24%...lmao) made me suspicious, so I didn’t let that influence me.  But yeah I didn’t like it that much. I don’t expect movies to be carbon copies of the books, and I appreciated the attention in some details and small references to the book. I just felt like it skimmed in a very superficial way over the topics and relationships of the story. Especially the last 45/30 minutes, very crammed and quick. It’s a lot of stuff for a 2 hour movie so I’m not that surprised.  Before watching the movie I read some comments from book fans that talked about how criticts didn’t get it, and I thought they meant the usual “they watched it, understood what happened, but didn’t really get the message of the movie”. After watching it I think the same but like...they really didn’t understand it. Not in a philosophical way but literally. I’m 100% if I hadn’t read the book I wouldn’t have understood it either. Even someone who is 100% focused and watches the movie two or three times won’t understand wtf is going on, unless they read the book or other people’s explanations. 

When I watched The Arrival I was really confused but after a second and third rewatch I got it. Reading people’s theories and analysis made me notice some details and small stuff, but I got the gist of it from the movie. I don’t think I would’ve been able to do that with The Goldfinch without the book, and that’s not okay. The book is a different medium and it allows you to get really into Theo’s perspective, unlike the movie but that’s normal. But the movie doesn’t stand on its own. And you can’t expect every single person who watched the movie, to have read the book as well. It has to stand on its own. + I still stand by the fact that they tried to get the message through by quoting some parts of the book, but it fell flat. Very pretty and great to look from the outside, empty inside.  It’s a difficult book to adapt. On a less serious note: Boris teaching Theo how to swear in Russian and then Theo swearing like his life depends on it when Grisha asks him to...one of my fav scenes. I hoped they would include that, but it’s a minor scene not crucial for the story so I’m not disappointed or surprised, just sad.