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#(not that any of them are endgame here rs)
kittkattys · 6 months
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Reverse AU buddies bc I was really getting bored of ignoring the five college assignments I have to do
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superoffbatter · 2 months
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Wolfstack's Ticking Time Bomb | Hard Mode Guide
Are you guys having fun with the new World Event? I know I am. I am having so much fun with my runs (and only 1 self-explosion so far) that I've decided to write up a guide for it!!!
There's around 14.000 of the World Quality left so we don't have all that much time to continue. If you just want to experience the travel, do a medium/easy run!
An Easy run is especially worth it if you just unlocked the ship, even. And the event is very cool!!!! The fear! The tension! The tick-tock of the bombs as you drag the bulk of your ship through the sharp rocks and winding paths, heart racing, eyes full of terror.
The doubt! The way you grow increasingly afraid, increasing terrified, thinking of anything, any solution at all to get out of this problem you have gotten yourself in. The maddening sound, the warmth, the desperation, the growing threat of mutiny quelled only be the ever more terrible threat of an explosive demise.
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This might be the *best* out of all the Living World Events we got so far!
Alrighty, so to the guide part.
First out of everything- admit that you are not going to be able to succeed in the checks. It's fine, if you're lategame to try and go for the medium ones, but the checks in the hardmode can reach up to 24 Zeefaring to 100%.
Yeah, it's genuinely insane. So, ignore them.
But if you can't use half the cards- how will you, a zailor of quality, finish this event's hardmode and get a nice new quality for your mantelpiece?
Here are some recommendations.
First of all, grind as much Strong-Backed Labour as you possibly can. I actually recommend either:
The Bazaar Side-Streets (marginally more efficient with underclay. Don't worry about the 3.50E you've just spent- this event can reach 8 EPA in hardmode, even if you don't have the needed Zeefaring.)
The Southwark statue in Jericho Locks. It's the best option for SBL, bar none, though it requires card draw.
In any other circumstance, I'd tell you to go for the Underclay, but this event is genuinely so profitable the Bazaar Side-Streets become a viable option. Every action you save is worth its weight in gold.
Get *as much SBL as possible.* 6-9 is the absolute minimum in my opinion.
Second: Stock up on Second Chances. Specifically, Dangerous chances. Keep your Suspicion below 5 as well so you can draw a certain very good card in zee.
Next: keep your Troubled Waters low. A bit of pirating here and there isn't too harmful- it doesn't really increase TW that much over the regular cards.
Keep at least one TW-reducing card in your hand, so you can use them to switch regions from Home Waters to London and from Stormbones to the event location. If you have more then one TW-reducing card in your hand, lower your TW, but always make sure to change regions with a TW-lowerer.
This is because your hand is wiped on region change, so to minimize TW you need to do this!
Good cards for TW reduction:
"A Corvette of Her Majesty's Navy,"
"The Wax-Wind" (if you have a zub)
"What do the Drownies Sing?" (if you have a Drownie Effluvia from Fruits of the Zee)
"A Giant Angler Crab" (specifically "Ready the guns and fire at its soft spots" option, reducing TW by 2 CP).
When you get there, every level of TW will be converted into the event menace, Volatility, and reaching 8 volatility will blow you up.
Now, you got to the hard part.
Most likely then not, you are not going to be able to do the advanced checks here, so keep to the Watchful check (which is super easy) and the Dangerous check (which is amazing)! They are, respectively, 'Steady! Steady!' and 'No way! There's no way!' and they will be your salvation.
Those second chances? Those are for the Dangerous check. Never play the Red Science check unless you're very very endgame and utterly loaded on that stat.
(I enjoyed the game telling me that 10% RS check is, incredibly, safer option than the one that has an actual chance of success and I can spend a second chance on.)
There are, at first, only 4 cards in deck, so you can keep drawing and playing those two.
By the time you have Progress to the Admiralty Depot 5, you start drawing a (bad) card called 'Now! Now!'
It's not very good. It has an insanely difficult check which you should never roll on, and an option that spends 1-3 Labours for some guaranteed progress.
When you draw this card, take a deep breath and check your Volatility. Is it below 4? Is it at most halfway to 5? If it is and your progress is *not* 6 or 7, you can bite the bullet and do a zeefaring check to draw again. You can take the damage. If it isn't, simply spend the SBL and draw again.
The card 'We're not going to make it!' has a slightly lower amount of damage dealt to you so pick it, if this happens.
Now, have you drawn 'Steady! Steady!' or 'No way! There's no way!' in your new draw?
Play those.
Now, draw again and hope for one of those two.
If you draw a Zeefaring check again, sigh mournfully and spend the SBL.
Rinse and repeat- even if you have the worst luck ever, 9 SBL should be enough to get you there.
And congratulations! Your heart is racing, your breath is hot- but you have earned your bounty.
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dingoat · 2 years
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For FIVE: 3, 6, 8, 9, 14, 17, 20, 28, 30.
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Just gonna use THIRTEEN'S FAVOURITE PHOTO right here ahaha.
3. What does your oc’s voice sound like? (Or, if you have one, what’s their voiceclaim?) Can they sing, whistle, or roll their rs? Do they have any speech impediments or notable dialects/accents?
Absolutely perfect, posh British, Bond-villain level Imperial. No two ways about it. I'm sure he's pretty good at doing voices as well, and definitely enjoys getting the chance to put fake accents into practice. He can sound as Corellian as they come if he wants to, drawl like a Tatooine farmer, and talk as foul as a Hutta gangster. He sings well, because of course he can, can roll his r's for great dramatic effect, and is definitely a pro at the ear piercing finger-whistle.
6. What kind of clothes is your oc least comfortable wearing?
HAHAHAHA omg maybe 90% of Thirteen's personal wardrobe??? I'm sure Five has some really absurd fabric preferences, things that he physically can't stand the touch of, but I think his vanity trumps everything. Anything that is not completely, perfectly flattering is disgracefully abhorrent.
8. What’s it like inside your oc’s mind? (Literally, or metaphorically.)
Oh. Man. Nobody wants to go there. Five's mind is a perfect storm of obsession, self loathing, self aggrandising, perfectionism, nightmares of the past and present, ambition and aspirations far greater than himself, the pursuit of pleasure, and all the rigid self discipline necessary to stay upright and present a perfect face with all the rest of that going on.
9. What are your oc’s goals for the future? Relationship-wise, career-wise, or other?
For many, many years, Five has worked toward the goal of attaining the rank of Keeper, which he believes would then allow him to begin quietly dismantling and reshaping the Empire more to his liking; namely, less inherent power awarded to incompetent fools purely by virtue of being born able to wield sorcerous magic. He is a man very accustomed to getting what he wants, and to working hard to tear down any roadblocks along the way. Recent events might just be forcing him to rethink his endgame, however.
14. If your oc spent one day free from any consequences or recognition for their actions, how would they act?
Ooof. The ‘lack of recognition’ definitely narrows down the options, hahaha, but I’m sure he has a mile long list of ‘people to relocate or murder as the opportunity arises’ that he’d start working his way through. Probably spend half the day plotting out exactly what series of misfortunes would leave him in the best possible position, then spend the other half of the day enacting the plot. He’s been pretty good at avoiding consequences for the majority of his life, but a free pass? That’s too good an opportunity to let slide, just to see what he can make happen.
17. If your oc had a social media page, what would it be like? What would they post about? How much personal information would they feel comfortable posting on it? How often would they update it?
I’m pretty sure he has dozens of social media pages for various different personas, and at least one profile for his Public Face that he pays a PR team to maintain across all the different platforms (except spacetiktok, he has too much dignity for that). All of them are very carefully managed and curated to present exactly the version of himself that is necessary for various assignments and covers- even though he rarely does fieldwork any more, you just never know when it might come in handy to step out into the street as an old persona.
He has the most fun on websites where he can be completely anonymous, however, and truly let loose as his real self. He would absolutely be The Worst kind of person on the internet, except for the handful of times when he might take a shine to some other anonymous random, use all the Intel resources he has at his disposal to discover who they are and where they live, and if they still meet his standards after that point, just dump a whole load of credits into their bank account that they will never be able to trace or understand.
20. What’s a superpower or magical ability that this oc would hate having?
Something something empathy, probably? What an absolute waste of magic that would be. He can read people just fine without some fake cheater way of doing it, thank you very much, and why on earth would he have any interest in being able to feel some other being’s miserable little feelings????
28. What’s your favorite thing about this oc?
I just love how much what was initially conceived as utterly generic, forgettable Bad Imperial Dude blossomed into such a genuine villain of the story, and just how hard he let the narrative be pushed and the stakes be raised? He’s a complete bastard, but with enough depth and personal motivation that he became a real driving force that allowed for some amazing unexpected turns and emotional weight that never could have happened with a hollow Antagonist Figure that just existed for the heroes to back against.
30. Tell a random fact about this oc!
Five’s assets include, but are not limited to, a Dromund Kaas based recording studio (mostly supporting independent classical musicians, but also promoting a couple of popular bands), an oyster farm and an upmarket cafe on Alderaan, a private game reserve on Onderon, an apartment complex on Coruscant and an entire block on Nar Shaddaa, some land on Taris that he is yet to do anything with, and is currently in negotiations for some land on Naboo.
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nastyburger · 4 years
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How would you rate each of the season finales from best to worst and why?
hmmm season one didnt really have a finale though? like it just ended on control freaks which was a good episode but not really a finale uhhh i guess i should rate the 2-parters in general since thats a little more fitting. theres no real structures to them being finales and they crammed 3 of them into season 2 lol
1) reign storm is number one for me, both RS and TUE rank very close and story wise (in terms of concept) i like TUE more but story for RS (in terms of actual execution) felt much more filling. im not a fan of the ecto-skeleton, especially with how they kinda tossed it away afterwards, but thats really the most i didnt enjoy from it. a lot of character dialogue and interaction was at its best in this episode and vlad especially was entertaining as hell with his antics.
2) i know its a little blasphemous to rank the ultimate enemy at #2 but i explained a bit of my reasoning lol. like, i really like TUE conceptually a lot and theres a lot of potential for a lot interpretation and story and all that, but time travel is a very delicate idea to work with in stories which the show certainly uh.......did not have. the episode fumbles a lot in execution with some aspects being a little too silly to take seriously (like the opening scene showing how amity advanced so much and made you think it was like hundreds of years into the future but it was only 10? danny’s reaction to certain events not being written the best? how the literal crux of the episode was explosive burger sauce???). but you know, the episode gave the phandom a lot of materials and ideas to work with in fan content and while TUE sorta falls apart if you really focus on details, its still a good episode overall.
3) hnnnnnnggg reality trip i guess? honestly the vast divide between how much i like the first two vs these last ones is a gosh darn canyon. similarly with how i like RS an TUE at about the same level but for different reasons, i also DISLIKE RT and PP at about the same level as well. I talked a bit about this one in another ask, but basically this whole episode is just a marvel rip off and hardly transformative of the concept in any way. the whole “secret reveal but then reverse it by the end of the episode” couldve worked great but only if we actually explored the concept a bit more instead of using it as a driving force to have the kids be chased across the country (not that it doesnt make sense but we hardly tackle the concept itself in favor of just having it happen for plot). and you know, i hate how they handled the reveal with the parents. i understand reversing the effects of having danny’s secret revealed for everyone else like the GiW but jack and maddie literally show themselves accepting danny for who he is and show that danny doesnt need to worry about being dissected molecule by molecule?? but then he just??? mind wipes them anyway???? im just not a fan of that lol. i guess one good thing i can say about this episode is the roadtrip aspect? idk i liked seeing the trio go to different places and hang out in diners and stuff like that, so ill give it that.
4) aaaand we all know what goes here, of course its phantom planet. everyone knows the problems with this one, we all are well aware of it! RT was bad because it was mostly boring and formulaic, but PP just had a whole smogus board of bad decisions. honestly, in my rewatch of danny phantom a couple months back, this series finale really had every problem of season 3 bundled up into one little package. sam’s arc, how every episode lowkey doesnt make any sense, the overly weird focus on the sam/danny endgame, its all here! its all right here in phantom planet like a full course shit meal! the characterization is awful and just a disgusting display of decay to end the show on. the worse part is that i feel like it couldve worked too, in some way if just everything was done differently with different writers and different everything else this concept couldve worked! but it didnt, just like everything else in season 3, it was good conceptually but when it came down to execution it just didnt work. and thats that.
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kethsi · 4 years
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I've been playing RS for around 15 years. I have no skills at 99. What can I do?
(There’s a TL;DR at the end if you’re in a hurry) One thing before I address the question itself - wow. From the bottom of my heart, WOW. You’re here for longer than most of us, anon. Remember you can put us all to shame by incorporating any old holiday outfits into your fashionscape. If you weren’t into events back then, slap on the 15 years cape you buy from Hans - it’s far more impressive to see than another max or 120 cape. Overall, remember that RuneScape’s a game. It’s here for your entertainment. You don’t need 99s to enjoy your favourite aspects of it or make some money. Now - here’s a few things to keep in mind when deciding on a course of action: Levels of Interest - you have to ask yourself which 99s you want, and which skills you’re willing to put up with. Some people hate dungeoneering, some hate agility, there’s even a weirdo here and there who hates combat (me. I’m that weirdo). Consider which one you’d want as your first 99. This is a moment I wish I could come back to and change myself. Which untrimmed cape is most appealing to you? Attack? Prayer? Slayer? Fishing? Herblore? Agility? Maybe one I haven’t mentioned here that belongs to your favourite skill? Do you intend to keepsake the cape once you get it to keep that memory? Or would a couple of screenies be enough? If that doesn’t matter to you, test some exp rates in different skills and simply work towards the fastest one you find. Try two or three different methods for each skill you know you dislike and ask yourself if you can see yourself wanting to dedicate any time to those methods at all. The biggest/best known ones are on the RuneScape Wiki. It’s always worth a look. Remember you can alternate between them so even if you like something, there’s no shame in training other skills instead of, for example, jumping around on an agility course for too many hours a day in a row. Ask yourself why you want to max a skill - Is it about some specific skill you know you’d be proud of until the other capes are within your grasp? Is one of the skills speaking to you emotionally/represents some dream job you would’ve liked? Is it about the Fashionscape? If it’s any of those, that’s completely fine. Creating your own neat memory of the first skill you chose to master is a lot of fun and is an excellent reason to go for it. But if it’s RuneScape being too well known for the “CAPE” part of its name, that’s an old meme. Some people feel the need to level simply because Jagex is keeping some of its new content behind higher-level doors, which is annoying as it’s Jagex’s own doing but if it does play a role, please remember to take a step back and remember this is an unfair element of the game design that isn’t very friendly to those of us who don’t chase exp at all costs. You don’t have to feel pressured if unbalanced game design is a big part of what pushes you to “fix” something about your character that isn’t broken at all. Prioritize your health - If you have work/classes that you’re tired after, a physical condition (especially with your hands/arms/back) that prolonged sitting and clicking around may worsen, ADHD or any other mental condition that makes long repetitive/boring tasks you hate seriously affect your mental state, or even if it’s “just” annoying/exhausting, these things can build up, so avoid the methods. What people forget about runescape is that there’s always more than one way to gain exp in stuff. “wasting” exp by taking breaks or doing fun stuff is the most fun thing to do in this game. Take it from me, procrastinating hard enough to drop my gainz rate to negligible is one of the only reasons I didn’t feel a burnout with this game. Distractions&Diversions (”activities”) - Several skills offer quicker bursts of exp/bonuses that make gaining exp easier for a short while. Familiarize yourself with them. For Divination, there’s Guthixian Caches. For Dungeoneering, there’s sinkholes. For Hunter, there’s Big Chinchompa. For Agility, there’s the Serenity Posts in the Hefin district in Prif. For Mining and Woodcutting there’s shooting stars and evil trees respectively. For Farming and Prayer (with slight exp in Dungeoneering and Mining too) there’s Nemi Forest. There’s also the Wild Jade vine for slight Farming&Slayer exp. All of the above are dailies, some can even be done twice a day. There’s also the weekly Skeletal Horror for some Slayer&Prayer exp, and God Statues for Construction (and a choice between Prayer and Slayer), if you need it. There’s also the weekly Tears of Guthix that raises your lowest skill, Circus for Magic, Ranging and some Agility (thieving&firemaking depending on what quests you did). Remember you don’t need to do all of these in a day or a week. My goal wasn’t to overwhelm you or make you feel like you need to do everything, I just want you to be aware of your options. YOU choose the skill to get EXP in - Continuing with d&ds/ activities, there are some that let you choose which skill you want your exp to go to. There’s Penguin Hide&Seek, every week, Agoroth which does the same after you fight it, Troll invasion which gives you more exp in a skill of your choice once a month. There’s also the Jack of Trades Aura - the best Aura in the game - that gives you daily exp (more exp the higher your level and the better the aura tier). These (along with Nemi Forest) are the ones I’d recommend if you have limited time and can choose only a few activities. There’s also Stealing Creation, which allows you to use your points to choose from a not unlimited, but wide enough range of skills to give yourself bonus EXP in (unfortunately it DOES take a long time to accumulate points in this minigame, so only do it if you actually find it enjoyable and have time to spare). This brings us to- Bonus EXP - Notoriously given by Jagex daily from Treasure Hunter and usually used to diminish people’s suffering leveling the slowest skills in the game or bankruptcy leveling the most expensive ones, pick the skill or two you know you hate the most and dump all of the prismatic stuff you get into it. Alternatively, you can put it all in the one skill you want to get 99 in first. Proteans and training dummy crates are in the same category. You usually get a choice what you want to use them for. I recommend making it after you’ve seen which skills are easier or more difficult for you. If you’re taking a stance against the whole thing or are playing on an ironman account now, more power to you and feel free to disregard this. Still, Stealing Creation is also a source of bonus EXP as mentioned above. So you can always use that, too. Quests - if you don’t have all of the quests in the game complete yet, check the RS wiki for the Experience Rewards you get from quests. I added a link for your viewing pleasure. Usually Master or Grandmaster quests you haven’t finished yet would either give neat chunks of EXP that can level you up in a skill or two, or a “choose your own gainz” lamp. Some might have an added exp bonus post-quest after you’ve reached a certain level. Sliske’s Endgame (I know, I know, big yikes), The World Wakes and While Guthix Sleeps, Children of Mah and the last of the Myreque quests provide some of the best “choose your own EXP” in the game for their completion. Always worth taking a look, maybe you haven’t done one or two of them yet. Get another opinion - Talk to friends or clanmates. Ask them what methods they’d recommend for any particular skill. Training cooking? maybe they just found the one fish in the game that can be bought raw for relatively cheap today. Training Summoning? maybe your clan follows patch notes and hidden updates and they’ve noticed some monsters drop crimson charms more often. Training Farming? Many wonderful people would lend or give you breeding pairs of animals you can breed and raise at Manor Farm. Hell, I can give you some animals myself if you want them. Chinchompas are the cutest thing since baby geckos and I have breeding pairs to spare!
TL;DR
1. Choose the skills you have the patience, mental and physical health for or the one you want to get 99 in the most 2. Compare training methods for those skills, using the RS wiki and your friends’ advice. Feel free to try some and find out what works best for you. 3. Get to training. Remember to take lots of breaks or alternate between skills or methods when necessary. 4. Distractions and Diversions are your friends. Especially the weekly/monthly ones that give you the direct choice of skill to dump exp in (Penguin Hide&Seek, Agoroth, Troll invasion). Also, Jack of Trades aura. It adds up like you would not believe. 5. Dump your bonus EXP in either the first skill you want to max, or the one/s you know you don’t have the patience for training. 6. If all else fails, check your quest list for any grandmaster quests you haven’t done yet. Maybe training the skills you’re “missing” for these quests will give you some feeling of set goal in the meantime. The rewards will push you a bit closer when you’re done. 7. This is a game. At the end of the day, if anyone tries to shame you or bring you down for not having a 99 in some skill, Buy the most expensive seniority cape Hans will Sell you and let the cape-obsessed noobs know you have unlocked the most important aspect of the game: Having actual fun in it for more time than they have.
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14x09 watching notes
jingle bells, bobo smells,  It is no fun, for us to wait All christmas in hiatus
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Berens... please...... I beg you........... don't kill the sweet precious moonchild that is Garth. Please. The joke is "how are you still alive!?" and it would be a disrespect to Bobby's memory, and he represents a stable post-hunting endgame that was a beacon in season 9. In this essay I will
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They used Dean's dead-voice "we're the guys that scare them" speech about hunting monsters in 13x05 to open. I wonder if Yockey wrote that thinking it might be the logical open to 13x23 and instead they used "this is boring, got any music?" also from one of his episodes.
[i guess! meme]
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The recap left us hanging about if Jack was alive or not for the Kaia recap which turns out to be rude even though I know that he's fine ("fine") now because I am so emotionally affected by this dumb lump of nougat that not seeing an instant "he's okay haha tricked you!" legit raised my stress levels a notch.
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Maybe because it's 4am and I was demolishing a slab of toast before the December chill in my room got it first, but I don't think there was any particular art or storytelling to the recap worth mentioning or musing on, and this came across almost more like the recap AFTER the break because getting back to plot stuff like seeing Mikey things again... The 13x05 lines make me wary on Dean's emotional behalf but obviously these are for very different reasons so the only real thing that might come up is that Cas is hiding his deal from Dean and Dean sounded so dead in the feels because Cas was dead. Obviously the real stress right now is what's up with Dean re: obvious nerve-wracking things like the djinn bouncing off his head or his swooshy vision, things we've been collecting up to ask more pointed questions about when Michael's in the room.
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Americans: "that's downtown Vancouver!/an actual American city!/the ACTUAL American city in the caption!" me: "hurrrr skyline"
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How much budget for Christmas music
I hate this episode already
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Okay the blood and screaming is improving things.
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Listen, werewolves always have so much fun these days. We had the knock knock one in 13x09, the Kardashian ones in 13x23, and now we have wereSanta here, who just spotted the mistletoe. D'aaaw.
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These halo-shaped lights in this apartment Michael picked sure are gonna come in handy if the director knows what they're doing.
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GARF. Please say you're here undercover.
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OH SHIT. Michael KNOWS. Being in Dean's head does that to you. All his peeps get embedded in your brain. Please tell me some 2 way vessel/angel nonsense happens and you can't bring yourself to harm him.
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GARTH HAS A LITTLE GIRL NOOOOOOOOOOOO
She adores Mr Fizzles. Garth spends hours with them hanging out together.
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I don't believe him though. I mean. He's just telling Michael what he wants to hear, right?
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Having a little girl is such a way to die, though. I mean. Can we just... not do that?
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Let Garth Go Home For Christmas
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Those halos sure aren't landing over Michael's head no matter how many of them there are
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Jack: eating gross cereal made of cookies at midnight in the dark
Me: I love and support you and have done the same
Cas: *SQUINT*
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Dadstiel is the best
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Sam being the "it will rot your teeth" dad is also the best. I love the Dad Heirarchy being established here. Sam is still Dad no.1 and the one who lays down the rules and gets disobeyed about midnight cereal, full on domestic dad-ing. Cas is the dad who hears you munching from across the entire Bunker and sighs and gets out of Dean's bed where they've been watching movies together (I extrapolate from missing data) and comes to investigate but ends up in the Secret Midnight Cookie Cereal Pact instead.
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If Garth dies he may bequeath Mr Fizzles to Sam to help parent Jack, who is now keeping secrets about midnight cereal consumption and needs an expert lie-detector to help him parent.
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Okay, so, in season 9 after Dean took the Mark of Cain he was up all night eating cornflakes and not sleeping. The corn was symbolic to Cain. Jack goes through all he did and has cookie cereal which is just his sweet tooth. But he had foreign grace implanted in him, and also is tapping a lil bit of his soul to be alive, meaning he's in a weird power situation and we don't know what's up with him at all. TFW are very much like "upright and not coughing blood is good enough for us", especially when with magic involved it's not like they might have an actual science explanation ever come their way.
Jack sitting in the dark is obviously symbolic of hiding things, his cookie cereal is disapproved of and a guilty secret from Sam in the first place, he's consuming something - willingly - that's bad for him and will rot him right after the sweet sweet probably not Gabriel grace he ingested 2 episodes ago, and added all up makes a secret - and he and Cas of course share Cas's deal secret so it's not like Cas can go stomping around complaining to the other dads what he found Jack doing without Jack being like yeah well guess what CAS did.
It's sure a fun way to parallel the beginning of Dean's dark dark arc and Jack's sugary sweet dark arc.
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Dean: kid if you are going to sit in the kitchen at weird hours and eat cereal, at least self-flagellate a little *slams the box of cornflakes down in front of him.*
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Jack also is wearing a lot of red lately.
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Though his new jacket is santa-coloured not like... Mark of Cain doom blood death coloured like demon!Dean's infamous red shirt.
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He's currently wearing Cas-coloured shoes and sitting in Dean's spot from 9x13 aka the iconic cornflakes scene in question.
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"If you can't sleep, that's understandable, given recent events." "You mean dying and coming back to life."
Cas has been around the humans too long. He talks in euphemisms and gets called out by his too-literal son.
The tables turn.
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Oh Jack... so full of worries about Heaven and if his mom is safe, and making Cas confront that nothing is perfect, even Heaven, and have to say it out loud because he can't lie to Jack and sugarcoat this.
Reminds me of 13x06 where he had to tell Jack that yeah sorry not all angels are perfect either. Sweet lil foetus!Jack sure picked the correct angel to be his guardian.
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Naomi is "complicated"
Cas. Hon. *hands him a blanket and a bowl of cereal*
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OH MY GOD Jack calling him out on why can't Sam and Dean know about the deal.
Having Jack around is so much a breath of fresh air that Cas is starting to regret ever kidnapping him in 12x19.
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"They CAN I just don't WANT them to know" CAS. You've been forced to Verbalise A Thing Using The Correct Language. I am giving you an entire gold star. TWO GOLD STARS. I'm drawing a smilie face on them.
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Jack is upset that Cas made the deal for him: "they don't need that burden. you don't need that burden" "of course I do. You did that, for ME" - the ole season 2 Dean thing, where it took until 2x08 to know for sure what John did and it basically killed Dean 3 times over and he was a Mess. Not knowing but not having all the answers and being worried/suspicious about what's up with the neat circumstances of being alive again is hooorrible. And this is calling out the whole Winchester cycle of sacrifice (conveniently now with us knowing that John will be dropping by for an episode to really hammer the point home) by addressing how Jack now has to carry the burden of knowing that Cas did that for him.
Cas is like, "Yeah don't worry I haven't been happy in all of Creation." Jack looks earnestly at him. "I'm sorry."
Cas diverts to eating the gross cereal, which he apparently also secretly indulges in, or else, as Mittens pointed out to me, Dean does too and either way Cas is being gross and adorable and hanging out with his kid and this is horrible I hate it oh god it's more sickly sweet than the cereal they're eating.
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Garth hiding in the kitchen to panic and phone mom to get him from the party.
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"THIS ISN'T YOUR MOM, GARTH, THIS IS AN ARCHANGEL"
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And he's just learned to say "balls" appropriately too.
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Sam immediately gets The Guilts because he's  being leaderly and losing Garth would be his first major blow as a leader oh god oh god no oh Sammy oh GARTH I can't handle this.
Berens sure is invested in the leader!Sam stuff and telling this story long before anyone else was and had his minion Glynn tease us with Maggie earlier in the season D:
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I'm calling mom to get me from the party
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"It's Ketch" Sam raises his eyebrows like "I forgot he was in this season"
Does that mean Ketch skyped Cas first
that's hilarious all by itself
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He has tea because of course he does
-
Oh my god he's skyping with Jack. Are they buds? HAS HE ADOPTED JACK?
Honestly of all the characters in the entire show he's probably resisted longest so far when it comes to adopting Jack if they ever met even briefly in Apocalypse World.
This is how you can tell he's the worst :P Rowena "I will never love again" MacLeod took all of 20 seconds to adopt Jack.
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He's been in England for like a week and his accent is 100x more hammy. "ExPRopriATE"
He's rolling his Rs. I mean. Is that even in our accent? Not in mine.
-
Jack watching attentively while he tells his story with no judgement forthcoming, just pure interest in what Ketch says... good thing Ketch is too self-centred on his tale of derring-do or he might find Jack's sweet interest flattering and begin wondering if he has it in himself to be fatherly.
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I'm suddenly legitimately interested in the unstoppable force of Jack's adoptability vs the immovable object of Ketch's ego.
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He posted it. Around Christmas. Look I'm friends with a postie and she's hucking around a bag as big as herself.
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Maybe he put a ribbon on it.
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From BUDAPEST. Paying extra really is gonna speed THAT up
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"Where is our weapon?" "It's been sitting in Guam for a week. I don't understand. Why is it in Guam?"
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TFW all react with snark, side-eyes or despair at Ketch, and 2.0 doesn't even get a reaction because I don't think Jack understands how dumbass Ketch is because he's too smol to have fought the mail :P
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"We appreciate the effort" "DO WE?"
Cas is staring into the void, meanwhile. Internally, "Well at least I can be sure I'm not going to worry about allowing myself to be happy any time THIS month"
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Oh, sweet! The laptop is set up right next to Britain on the map table :')
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Hey if they have to brave the post office to get the egg, they can find out Harper is still stalking Jack :D
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Cas can't even work out which direction to start rolling his eyes, gives up and walks off. Dean gestures the screen, look what you made him do! You asshole!
-
"Only thing that can take him down now is the full Ichabod" "?" *gestures decapitation* "oh."
Poor Garth. Werewolves really are the worst. I can see why you were so upset about being turned.
-
Remember when Sam described him as an "ichabod crane alike" or something, I think in 9x12 when asking at the hospital about him? Maybe? I swear to god that might be a less subtle hint Garth is going to die than Charlie's "merry christmas"
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Garth honey nooo
-
I'm pretty sure we saw Michael mind-controlling the werewolf in the cold open which means we're in for SOME sort of drama next
-
Oh good Cas is back, I guess he went to scream outside.
"Oh it would have made it if it wasn't closed for the holidays" Sam is being so withering I hope Ketch can feel it from Budapest.
-
Garth you are going to get in so much trouble and I'm so scared for you and your family at Christmas
-
At least in this scene Dean n Cas are playing footsie under the table if nothing else.
-
With Michael holed up in a towerblock for Christmas I am so worried that I should have watched Die Hard before getting here.
-
D'aw Dean teams himself up with Cas without even hesitating.
-
Holy shit they used a season 1 clip of the Impala driving past a field of cows.
"Hi we shot this for 1x06 it's practically an easter egg now"
-
God, it's the promo scene and we're 16 minutes in.
Not over Cas being like "you're happy" because he can't be happy but he's seeing Dean being, you know, cheerful. It's worrying because it's so close to endgame... if they kill Michael, Dean can be happy. And if Dean can be happy...
bye bye Cas
-
It's so easy with Dean looking away for Cas's silence to be "lol never" instead of "I ought to tell you the string that is attached"
-
*quietly climbs into the garbage pile as I think about how neither can be happy while the other is as a literal plot mechanism*
-
Them leaving the door open seems so significant I thought we were going to see Bad!Kaia comically hiding behind it
-
Awwwwww Jack wants to break into his first building with lock picks!!
I can't believe they're doing this in broad daylight.
I can't believe there was a Gish item to go to a post office after hours dressed as Santa's elves and that's what Jack is doing with that coat
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"Who taught you to pick a lock?" "I did. And the internet"
Sam's "that's my boy" face.
-
"I wanted to stay useful"
that was your cue to tell Jack he's useful regardless
On the other hand he got the door opened and smiled up at Sam so I guess he gets the validation that way instead.
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"HAPPY Holidays" Jack is SO PLEASED the box is saying something nice.
-
BOOM you have witnessed, once again, Sam being knocked out.
Wow, no. His skull is getting thicker, he manages to cling on long enough to watch his boy being abducted.
HAPPY HOLIDAYS, SAM.
-
Awww Michael came to oversee it. HAPPY HOLIDAYS, Michael!
-
Sam is way too concussed to deal with this. Or drive.
-
Michael has a really similar coat to what he had in the AU but for a fancy rich lady instead of a badass hot cowboy which really begs the question of why he dressed SO SO OTT for Dean, even given his fashionista tastes for the other 2 vessels we've seen.
-
I am sad we don't have the other Michael vessel just because he's off making out with Constantine on Legends of Tomorrow (meta textuality of THAT to be unpacked by fandom at length :P), but she's an absolutely uncanny female double for him with the coat and the ominous camera angles and her general scary vibe.
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"You're going to kill me anyway" *MOOSE CHARGE*
I stan one concussed boy
-
Blorp
No fancy weapons for you guys, use your heads.
Not Sam's head, he's just taken his 3rd hit in a minute.
-
Garth gets caught snitching though I suspect Michael knew he was listening in and sent Dean to get attacked by Bad!Kaia anyways.
There's chess being played here.
-
Er, and you're the pawns.
I think Dean is the other player and everyone ELSE is a pawn in Michael's reckoning.
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"WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHAT DO YOU WANT?" Kaia, they just shouted like 20 minutes of the plot so far at each other, you know as much as we do at this point.
-
I love Kaia's fighting stance but oh my GOD Dean walking up to the spear and having it put against his heart. He knows it's a power move but it's also a gentle one, and he's waved enough guns in her face and our Kaia's face... This is one of those moves you use both on frightened animals and also to show you are a good unarmed nice guy and it's an attempt to re-negotiate after all he's done to Kaias over time >.>
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"if you're not going to give it to me, kill me" Dean says, at the end of his big emotional appeal to Family And Saving People as his divine guiding forces in the universe by which he sets his moral compass and acts as the best version of himself in the defence of.
Cas behind him like "I hope this works because I love this dumbass and if you ACTUALLY kill him I'm contractually obligated to murder you so like, pls don't escalate this"
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"How do I know if you're telling the truth" well he's not so jot that down.
Cas like "can you please stop talking, Dean, I am not agreeing with any of your policies here" because not only did he drag Jack into it, he made a promise that Jack's completely unable to uphold since he, you know, doesn't have the power to get Kaia home any more.
Poor Bad!Kaia though. Spent her life running from monsters too. She and our Kaia have the same trama, but she's so hardened by it :(
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"If you don't bring this back to me I will find you and kill you"
Yikes, magic weapons are having a bad run in these parts, I think Dean's pretty much a gonner :P
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I love that the Wayward Sisters music plays around Kaia but it makes me so so so so sad
-
"So, what, is he playing us?" he's playing YOU Dean. Your move!
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"Don't you go in there alone." "I know, drive fast"
Aka concussed bab is gonna go in there alone if you don't hurry.
-
I have literally no comprehension about the driving times involved in this episode because I don't know US geography like that, but it's Berens not Dabb but he's mentioned specific locations so he better have looked these all up on google maps because this is one heck of a fact checkable episode with 4 distinct known and named locations and you all driving to and fro.
-
I love Michael's new apartment. It has a dark Heaven aesthetic vibe which is perf.
Jack's here and he's immediately deposited under the halo lights.
I can not WAIT for a Jack vs Michael scene.
*chin hands*
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"Why didn't you kill me?" *eyebrow raise*
Poor nougat is being made to feel useless again :( This is Michael grinding his heel into Jack while he has him on the floor, kneeling in supplication under those halo lights.
-
Michael is into villain monologuing. A terrible, terrible habit.
"Death from above," Michael says, the first time he's had halos over his head.
His concept of soul ownership intrigues me because he would get all the humans who died in an attack on this city in his original world. In this he's turning them into monsters but with his grace, so they belong to him. That means that somehow or other he's probably overriding not just their nature to be controllable by him, which overrides in turn Eve's control over all monsters. She totes isn't dead BTW she's just in Purgatory. I'm like 100% sure of it :P Anyway I do wonder if Michael's control over the monsters extends so far as accidentally granting them passage to Heaven by claiming them and overriding Eve's control. Who knows. The thought wandered by and really tickled me.
Because it's a long game with the real value in people for beings of this level just being in their value as collectibles after death, and season 5 was all about our Michael getting all the souls by killing all the humans and storing them away in Heaven and that was his Paradise he was fighting for. And if he's converting entire cities to monsterhood in order to gain control over the territory in a quiet no mess way, then his control and command of them is passed on through the bite thanks to whatever he did to them. At the very least he's managed to make himself into their new Alpha.
I mean unless this is a phase one and he's sacrificing getting the souls of these lot in exchange for a lot more souls down the line.
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LOL Michael pulls "I'm your only kin" and Jack's like, uh, REAL Michael is in the cage, POSER.
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I love how Jack's got the such simplistic child language of "I hate you" which comes out so honestly and fiercely. Jack's 1 layer personality is reaaally deep even if it is mostly 1 layer. A very very thick slab of nougat. Full of goodness. It's EXCELLENT character writing to balance a character like this. He has a good understanding of the world by now, evidenced by very clearly being able to distinguish AU!Michael from his living kin of our Michael in the cage, and yet at the same time his emotional range is still 100% whatever he feels about a thing and so for Michael it's hate. Because when kids get upset they can yell "I hate you I hate you!" in a tantrum, and Jack's personality is that but moderated and adult and reasonable, and that... What a good approach to writing a character. Om nom nom.
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This vessel is definitely way more expressive than the previous two Michaels, which is something I've noticed in a looot of the vessel gender swaps, which really makes me go sociological on why gesturing and fiddling and so on is so much a part of presence for a female character on screen, while male characters are allowed to stand still and just kind of radiate presence. I mean, she HAS presence, but she's been moving her hands a lot and it's the main detail which makes her not match up as neatly. Jensen threw his whole personality into not moving Michael's arms, to follow on from Christian's portrayal.
I think Raphael's second vessel was menacingly still. That actress did a great job. That slow head turn after they hurl an angel blade at her in 6x22... Nice.
Lisa Berry strikes a nice balance at huge presence and only necessary gestures, and Julian Richings was always fiddling with junk food as Death despite his cosmic presence.
Meg was all in the voice and eyebrows, both actresses.
-
Why am I musing on this? Because it's 7am and I'm having a wave of immense sleepiness and I think I need tea to keep on watching but it's cold so I'd rather stay bundled in blankets >.>
... I have now turned on the heating and got tea and done some stretches to try and ward off the cold-blooded lizard stupor I was sliding into. Brrr. We get Christmas break on episodes because it's so hard to watch in the cold.
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"Our relation is more a matter of scale, power." Ooohohohooo but you just said you weren't killing Jack because he was powerless.
I mean I'm crowing at Michael for maybe revealing a flaw in his monologue to me but at the same time that's terrifying for what he plans for Jack because that presumably involves powering back up but under HIS control. Nephew theft.
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I say smugly having posted Jack being kidnapped by Michael in Andrea's Diner for his power/money last week so that I can just ride this one out with a "in before this plotline" raised eyebrow.
I mean I was using a hybrid season 8/14 set up with Naomi still being Michael's flunky but the important thing is that he was trapped in an office in a towerblock which may or may not now be exactly this one since I have eyes on it and Michael was gonna do whatever it took to get Jack's share of the company until Cas marched in and saved the boy.
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Yeah my diner AU has corporate drama, deal with it.
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NOW we're getting to the epic speeches. The time that makes mountains. Epic. And Michael is like hey you and me are the only ones left... And as your power returns and grows, we'll only become more alike. Cut to Jack being HORRIFIED by the concept of becoming anything like his AUncle and losing his human compassion and turning into this evil being that cheerfully talks about how not only to level cities but to improve on the concept.
Finally, we hit the epic tragedy level of Jack's story he's been hiding from in other genres from disney to rom coms to cute twee Christmas movies and even a detour into 1800s consumptive child drama to avoid it. But Hamlet's procrastination has to be challenged occasionally, and so they're face to face and Michael is taunting Jack with how he might be cute as a nougaty 2 year old but oh dear the terrible 2s are nothing to the terrible 2 billionties.  
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I think this room even has Heaven's furniture, as a riff on it. What's one world to another? One Heaven from another, as Michael says. Find a head office, treat it like a place of power and intimidation and it becomes one.
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All Jack says is "Sam, Dean and Castiel. They'll come for me." Because he doesn't know much but in his 2 years he HAS learned who fights for him and considers him family, and who he will really set his morality by.
-
Of course if Cas ever allows himself to be happy, then ALL of Jack's family has an expiration date and no one can follow him through those eons to stop him straying.
-
Also: now eternity has a sense of horror to it. The reminder that immortality is awful and this is what it does to ancient eldritch beings. And as a result, that finite humanity may be better when it doesn't come at the cost of erosion of self.
To thine own self be true, to quote a terribly mis-used part of Hamlet and yeah yeah I studied it I know Polonius said that and it's meant to be a ridiculed line. But it's still emotionally relevant >.>
Jack's fierce sense of self and family is his only weapon here. Michael can't cast doubt on that. Maybe fear for the future, but in the immediate presence, Jack has a ROCK.
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That red coat also makes him very distinctively the only real colour in the room.
Michael is wearing dark blue for the red vs blue coding, but it's dark enough to not stand out in the decor.
TFW are all wearing brown and tan.
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I'm actually quite fond of this stupid jock werewolf.
Awkward silences with jingle bells in the background... why are they making werewolves inherently comical in Dabb era, I don't know. But I LOVE it.
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RIP the sexy werewolf.
Dumb jock werewolf has already run off, which MAY be a reminder to panic about all the monsters in position, or he might get stopped on the way by TFW in a strategic position...
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RIP other sexy werewolf.
Both, sadly, as hot as they were, die with amusing riffs of jingle bells to accompany their decapitations. No dignity in death for these fuckers.
-
Sam may or may not be doing a Red Meat by taking them on alone but he sure is in a better position with only a mild concussion leftover from the earlier attack rather than, you know, a barely-treated gut shot.
-
Man I hope Cas healed up the residual damage of that before the end of season 11.
-
Sam is indeed alone as he promised not to be while 100% intending to rush right in, which means that dumb jock werewolf did indeed run off into the city, which means that with 10 minutes left a whoops we let Kansas City turn into monsters cliffhanger might be a lark.
-
Merry Christmas everyone but Kansas City.
-
I mean Sam doesn't need to rush on the Jack rescue, Michael literally has eons of AUncle-nephew bonding planned.
-
The fact Alex has visible chicken pox scars on his forehead amuses me so much. While Jack fast-track grew in 12x23 he randomly inflicted the pox on himself as part of the childhood experience. Like, oh, I better get all my immunity from mom so when my 3 dads collectively fail to get me vaccinated at least I've got that. *boop* chicken pox scars appear.
-
S'gonna be Garth on the other side of that door
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OH NO IT IS
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Oh no Sam, it's a trap, he's gonna eat you. Oh no oh no you can't cut Garth's head off. He's a Beloved Sweetie Pie.
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If this ends with watching Mr Fizzles get a hunter funeral I am sending Bobo a mountain of coal for Christmas.
-
Love that universal trope of the werewolf ducking away for an embarrassing uncontrolled transformation that looks somewhere between puking and period cramps. Moonsickness.
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Michael is the moon controlling it in this case.
Cosmic bodies.
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Don't touch him, Jack!!
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Transformations with glowy eyes suck :<
-
This is just CRUEL to make Garth be like "I'm sorryyyyy" as he charges at Sam.
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LOL THIS IS A CRYPT SCENE. He's in Garth's head!
"You don't have to do this!" "You can fight this, Garth!"
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Me, staring at my mess of red string connecting crypt scenes: How did I get to Garth wolfing out while shouting apologies at Sam and Sam begging him to stop when this all started with Dean n Cas fighting over a lump of rock 6 seasons ago
-
Oh thank god they ended it with Sam vulcan neck pinching Garth to sleep after Jack took a rolling tackle at him and Garth ends up still controlled and shoved in the back of the car for later problems.
We'll file this under the failures section between bros and move on though I won't deny Berens had me in a cold sweat that I was going to have to throw years of work out because Sam would grab Mr Fizzles out of Garth's pocket and soothe him back to himself :P
-
Mr Fizzles x Garth as the Destiel parallel of the year
-
"Thanks for waiting for us," Dean says, angrily gesturing the alive and rescued Jack while uselessly holding the spear.
-
It's okay baby there's 7 minutes left and Cas still doesn't have fake blood all over him.
I think Mikey might come back around to gloat. He strikes me as the supervillain type to do that.
-
They figure out the last few chess moves that Michael made while sitting on the trunk that Garth is locked in. Rough.
In the background, Cas strides over to the brooding Jack.
Boop.
-
"I wouldn't bet against us."
In Which Dean Nearly Decapitates His Brother
-
Rousing family speech about no odds or element of surprise or fear from Michael, and they go dramatically walking off towards the elevator with blaring Christmas music.
I hate this
-
Everyone has a weapon except Jack, who just has a series of incomprehensible troubled looks every time anything happens.
The Boy Is Concerned. But is it about what's going on around him, or inner turmoil disrupting his nougaty centre?
He looks placid again during the dramatic walk, while everyone else has their hero faces, he's surrounded by his dads so he can just be like :3 and enjoy the adventure.
-
Michael is bored and pacing because they took too long having broments downstairs and walking slowly towards the elevator and he wants to do this great dramatic turn when they arrive but the elevator is craaaaaaawling up the building.
Fine, what if I'm not by the window but sitting down with my back to them.
Is Michael NERVOUS?
Big talk about being a zillion years old and then getting impatient.
-
What did Michael just see? Because he lit up his eyes and got a lot more confident...
"There... he... is" he smirks.
Me when Cas
-
Cas doesn't usually nearly get a killing blow on me, though. Nice move, bud.
-
HEY, RUDE. DOn'T HURT HIM
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I know he just tried to stab you but I'm allowed to yell that. Also stabbing archangels doesn't tend to work on them but whatever :P
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Come on Dean, GET HIM. He hurt the bae! And Sam and Jack now! But nowhere near as dramatically!
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Ironically if Michael had just had any patience he wouldn't have fallen for being baited into coming to see Cas snooping around his front desk.
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OH NOICE THIS IS THE SAME FIGHT WITH MICHAEL AND DARK KAIA BUT DEAN AND MICHAEL
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Ow, Dean not doing so well after all.
-
Is that Sam or Jack inching a hand towards the spear. If Sam stabs Michael then it's a thanks in return for stabbing Lucifer. If Jack does... Badass, kid needs a big kill.
On the other hand, we're so near cliffhanger time territory that.. well.
-
Nope, Sam just did the slide a weapon back to Dean thing and Dean got in a hit on Michael in their duel.
-
Same arm he got stabbed on.
-
"trust me, that's gonna leave a scar"
Jack I hope you are paying attention to Dad no.3's use of one-liners because he is a master.
When he isn't, like, "you're the shortbus, shortbus."
-
UHOH Michael is standing with aaaaaall the haloes reflected behind him in the window and Dean is having Suspicious Killing Hesitation
aaaand there's the whooshy vision wow what a surprise
-
I KNEW IT WAS COMING AS SOON AS MICHAEL'S SHOULDERS WENT ALL CONFIDENT AND HE STARTED STARING AND I'M STILL UPSET.
I mean I knew it was coming as soon as Dean stumbled in like ??? I'm not Michael???
But in the short term, argh.
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WHAT IS THIS BAR
-
It has a moose head, Jo's shooting game from the Roadhouse, and the old jukebox from 4x01's diner where Sam and Ruby hung out.
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Aside from anything else this is a horrible ploy by Michael to get the spear.
-
WHEN DID MICHAEL BARTEND.
I am so intrigued.
-
But yeah, checkmate, Dean Winchester. Snapped your magic spear and melted to magic egg. What next?
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Oh good and now he has the halos behind his head :< :< :< :<
Wanek I am so angry. You get coal too.
-
LOL Michael giving them a lesson on maaaaaaaybe asking important questions about things instead of just leaving them as soon as a character appears to be functioning on the surface, I type with this paused with Jack in the corner of my screen as a fortuitous example
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Michael gloating about breaking Dean is the worst Christmas cliffhanger.  I hate you Bobo.
-
You aren't seriously going to end the season on a snap and make us make Michael is Thanos jokes all hiatus? I mean he already fucked up one planet, decimating it in the name of a better world. Please. Don't do this, Bobo.
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He did it.
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Reminds me of the end of 3x10 as well, with demon!Dean lurking under Dean, waiting until before the credits to snap his fingers from within Dean's subconscious to remind us he was lurking and waiting.
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Aw man this sucks.
Now Jack has to murder Dean after all.
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You're not gonna watch endgame?? Why not?
Ok, before I say why, i just want to clarify: my reasons are to do with my opinion. I don’t have anything against other people watching it, or having fun with it, that’s awesome. These are just my personal reasons for not watching it.
I’m tired. I’m just tired of the whole franchise. The cowardice of the directors (not making any heroes LGBTQA+, having the bare minimum of POC heroes and no main Asian heroes [Dr Strange was a great opportunity]), the plotlines (we’ll get to that later), the sloppiness, the forced relationships, the mischaracterization of a lot of individuals. The balance between mistakes/bad conduct and good content has swung negative for me, and I’m just tired
The cowardly plotlines. Everyone is a hero and nobody makes hard decisions. True, they’ll self sacrifice till the cows come home, but sacrifice other people for the greater good? We saw in Infinity war they’d rather kill a bunch of Wakandans indirectly than directly murder one robot man. Having a hero choose to sacrifice others would have been interesting, but instead they were cowardly.
Mistreatment of Thor. This one really is personal, because he’s my fav. Constantly, he gets sidelined, his powers get buffed or nerfed according to the movie, his personality swings like a yo-yo for no reason (I like what Taika did, and I personally headcanon he went a little kooky bc he was by himself adventuring for a few years, but that didn’t get explained), and from what I’ve heard, his pain, depression and grief gets turned into a massive comedy act in Endgame. Making fun of mental health is never ok. Also people constantly wielding his hammer cheapens its purpose to me. He always get sidelined for things he could easily do  - take the nuke out of NY in Avengers, for example, easily follow ultron to base in AOU - and it’s all to do with lazy writing, because they don’t know how to do deal with an extremely powerful character. I saw a wonderful post about if he had used the infinity gauntlet instead, and it made far more sense than what I’ve heard happens. (Here it is, I found it)
Bad female characters. Marvel only knows how to write a Black Widow character (sexy fighter). They’ve got better in their stand alone films, but there’s still only 1 major one (Cpt Marvel) and 3 side characters (Valk, Shuri, and Okoye) who are good. There were some in Spiderman too, but i don’t think they’ll play any major roles in Endgame.
I’ve stopped caring about 90% of the characters. Hawkeye sadly never had a character. Neither did Black Widow or Scarlet witch tbh. Tony stopped being a lovable gremlin ages ago. Steve has no character/very bland character in ensemble movies, and will never get a natural ending being in a relationship with Bucky (this was even foreshadowed probably by mistake in Winter Soldier). The Guardians of the Galaxy are very similar to the Avengers’ characters. Vision didn’t have a character either (Avengers Assemble even does him better). Just…I don’t really care about most of them, see 1.
Shock value. I don’t care if someone dies or not. Just make it a good story. I’ve been told endgame has some good twists, but I don’t trust the R*sso Br*th*rs anymore, and see 1.
Sloppy writing. Especially with Infinity war and AOU in mind. The villains were awful, no character, not interesting. The battle at Wakanda was avoidable and actually winnable if they had any competent generals writers (see this).  Thor not chopping off Thanos’ arm or head when he 100% could have.  Ultron not actually taking over the internet or hijacking all of tony’s tech. The fucking farm. I guess at this point I’m just expecting more of the same frustration. See 1.
It’s a superhero movie. I get it’s meant to be fun, simple and flashy, but that’s not how it’s hyped. It’s presented as something that’s meant to be mind blowing, clever and ground-breaking. It’s probably a good film, but in my opinion it doesn’t deserve the massive hype. They left behind ensemble fun in Avengers 1 (was that even fun or just in-fighting? idek anymore) and see 1.
They got so obsessed with the overarching big bad plotline that they haven’t developed relationships between characters that much. Are half of the Avengers even friends? I don’t know, I’ve never seen them interact. Does Natasha drink with Thor? Do Bucky and Tony just get along now? Dr Strange and Carol? Bruce and Spiderman? idek. See 1. Tbh the whole franchise would have probably worked better as a tv series.
i don’t like giving disney money,  they’re satan
so yeah, long post about that. If ya don’t care about my opinion, don’t read, because that’s all this is.
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worldguardian · 5 years
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I think you bring up an interesting point on how powerful the world guardian is. Out of curiosity, how do you think the WG’s power should be handle at its full potential/what do you think the powers should be besides being immune to god magic? How would the WG be able to stop Sliske without their full power being unleashed or do you think the outcome should have been handled differently (eg. not 'killing' Sliske off by the WG)?
thank you for sending this in! I’m sure I’ve said it a million times but nothing brings me more joy than when people interact with this blog and get in on the discussion. love that stuff.
as for your question... that’s a hard one! someone else in that reddit thread brought up the extremely important (and true) point that the WG is pretty much exactly as powerful as the narrative calls for in any given moment. it’s why the WG can clear a certain challenge with ease and then catastrophically fail that exact obstacle the next time.
unfortunately, this can - and has - lead to some serious in-narrative power creep where because the game has to be playable, and the player must always be able to win, they’re in a position where they have to constantly up the stakes of what the WG faces in order for it to still be a “challenge”, because the WG just breezes through everything thrown at them in the end.
this is a seriously unsustainable form of tension-building and usually eventually leads to either jumping the shark (which I would definitely say has already happened with the aforementioned “killed sliske” thing + others), or else the narrative stakes kind of eventually fizzling out because the writers run out of bigger fish.
this is why constraints and limits are good in writing! the hero can and should be defeated sometimes!
anyway that was basically all preamble and now I’ll actually answer your questions. to do so I’m going to answer very much from a headcanon angle, and I’m also going to treat things as if RS were a story instead of a videogame, because like I explained, gameplay takes absolute priority over story and in that framework my answers just won’t work. hope that run-on sentence made sense!
the basic tenets of the World Guardian blessing are as such:
- total immunity to god magic unless expressly consented to. an important note is that this does not seem to extend to physical actions or magic that the god has worked upon themselves to then “act upon” the World Guardian. see: Seren floating to catch the World Guardian above the lava during Children of Mah. technically, no god magic was worked upon the World Guardian, and the blessing didn’t extend so far as to interfere with what Seren was doing. there’s definitely some loopholing to be had here.
- inability to ascend. this is pretty straightforward and I like this one a lot.
- quite possibly related to the above: the inability to permanently absorb or be powered up by elder artefacts. after Guthix’s death, it’s noted during Dishonour Among Thieves that the World Guardian can only temporarily channel the Stone of Jas’ power, and this boost will very swiftly leave them after contact/possibly close proximity is broken.
from here, everything is either stuff that would Just Make Sense, or headcanon. for example, it’s reasonable to assume that the World Guardian has some kind of augmented lifespan, because of course Guthix wouldn’t leave the fate of the world/universe to a human that’s gonna die after like sixty years.
(I’ve explained my own version of that before, but to sum up I basically have it as a kind of conditional immortality. until the World Guardian’s purpose is fulfilled, their soul remains bound to their body and thus they won’t pass on if/when killed.)
- probably physically and magically boosted as well, though not much on the magic end since we still have to use runes, etc. once again, leaving a task of this magnitude to something as squishy as a human is just not a good idea.
as for “the World Guardian’s power at its full potential”, I think we’re already at that. it’s a very clear-cut power and duty: deny the gods. I don’t think that will - or needs to - develop any further. I think any progress should be from the WG personally; e.g. learning stronger spells, becoming better at combat, etc. I called the WG blessing a defensive power and I think it serves its purpose in the story best as one.
cut the super saiyan thing out entirely. deus ex machinas are almost never good and once this kind of power is introduced you’ve pretty much gutted any and all tension you could possibly hope to build. who cares that the World Guardians in their tightest spot yet? they can just super saiyan their way out. this is why I said it’s looking like we’re headed straight to elder god stories, because they’re some of the only things that can stand against a plot device like that haha.
as for Sliske’s death... it absolutely should have been handled differently. if we’re trying to respect the story’s already-extant rules and lore, there’s just no way the WG should have managed that. there are better options available. the one I mentioned was Seren - having her swoop in and vapourise him while the World Guardian was a distraction or something would have been super cool! it would be an opportunity for her to actually do something, for the sake of the world rather than her own selfish means. a selfish action - revenge - that nonetheless aided the world would have been a great addition to her character and we wouldn’t have had to leave that thread hanging.
Zaros would have been an option too. he absolutely would not have tolerated a risk factor like Sliske after all the shit he’d pulled by the time of endgame, especially if you’re in a timeline that assumes Zarosian World Guardian.
shit, even Azzy. the snake killed his little brother and we can see that he’s pissed at that.
not everything in the story has to be done by the main character! they had the choices there.
I’m gonna cut this here because endgame in particular had so many holes in it writing-wise that I could be on about this all week. thank you once again for this question, and I hope you enjoy your essay!
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lucidpantone · 2 years
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I agree with you, except that’s not the season they wrote, that’s the season they think they wrote. Making a couple break up is a cool idea because it’s the closest thing to the spirit of og skam which has been missing for a long time (teenagers having insecurities, shame! and starting and failing! to navigate the world). They only could do it with mayla because they were the established couple people actually cared about. The season they should have written was the one in the flashbacks (1)
anon cont: the one about a failing relationship not the one about an already failed one (that’s the reason they had to “betray” the format and include them because we had not seen the cracks in the couple). They went the skamfr way and had to include a triangle with an underwritten character with barely original scenes in their relationship only parallels to the og couple, gave the main a medical condition, resurrected a grandma so that maya had a secret so that lola felt betrayed and justified in her decision, and stole a ep from the main pov, etc. So yeah the break up was a cool idea as a conclusion to a season not as a starting point, that’s what’s naturally upsetting people. In S5 with Arthur it worked bc it was a natural conclusion after what people had seen. Instead they wrote a 1st break up and then included a sex scene so they had cornered themselves into a second breakup (3rd in their rs) and people don’t wanna believe it’s definitive because, well, they cried wolf before so...
This is a interesting idea what if the conclusion of the season had been the end and not the beginning...... here is the thing tho doing the moonwalk back to an ex is very common. So if you we want to talk about being realistic that is very realistic people sometimes dont have a clean break up. They go back and forth dip their chip a couple of times in the sexy sauce until they realize its not healthy its not moving their personal wellbeing forward.
I mean it has happened to alot of our evas right? They go back and forth with their jonas a bunch. I think the issue here is something you hit on which Mayla is a massive fan fav couple. Probably the most popular couple of the new gen of skamfr and btw I dont think them being wlw is what makes them big even tho it does help its more so because we have seen them for so many seasons and we see that they aren't perfect they feel like a very young adult couple that has ups/downs with two young women trying to be together but also figuring out who they are as individuals. This is something I think lacked a ton with Fatou/Kieu-my but they are still in the NRE(new relationship energy)-phase but that all couples like Eliott said go through their moments of either reinvention or break up. I do get why we had to have a lola episode because we wouldn't understand the ultimate decision of why she cut it off but personally i dont think we needed it. I think staying with Maya and really examining how journeyless she is with/without lola is the point. Lola doesnt make maya more or less journey less this is on maya. She needs to create the parameters of her life and she needs to COMMUNICATE them to lola. I dont mind the June thing but I actually wished we had used it as a plot device. I wish maybe we had highlighted that Maya is a bit of serial dater and maybe Max even harps on this that she moved on quickly to lola and it hurt him but also this would highlight how Maya never takes time to reflect and mourn a relationship so her finally mourning in a healthy manner would explain her behavior of moving so quickly with June. Plus who doesnt have that friend who literally jumps in and out of relationships. I dont personally hate this season I actually think its one of the most flesh out character driven seasons we have had. Like I understand Maya 100%, who she is, whats makes her tick and what motivates and frightens her but once again i am ok with mayla in any format so maybe thats why i watch this season and the endgame question doesnt really matter to me at all.
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mdsabbirh · 3 years
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shipcestuous · 7 years
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(1/7) RS anon here; just completed 'Children of Mah'. It didn't have as much interaction between Zaros and Seren as I might have liked--more of its focus was on Zaros and Zamorak--and what there was wasn't as shippy as I might have liked, but I think it does still bear mentioning. First, though, it is necessary to mention that Zaros and Seren have a tribe of younger 'siblings'. Z and S are unique as the children of Mah's body, mind, and essence, but after Z escaped Mah's cruelty, she dreamed
(2/7) the Mahjarrat into existence. As a result, Z and S both view these Mahjarrat as much younger siblings, or even adoptive children, though Zaros did not encounter them until much later. The Mahjarrat have revered Mah as their mother and patron goddess for most of their existence, performing ritual sacrifices of their own kind to her, which they believe her to have instructed them to do. During the quest it is revealed that Mah was never lucid enough to do any such thing; Seren
(3/7) impersonated her and commanded the Mahjarrat to sacrifice themselves to her because every time they reproduced, it weakened Mah further. By sacrificing themselves to her, they could return some of this ‘stolen’ energy. Seren still believed it was her duty to look after her mother, and this is how she chose to do so. When this is revealed to the Mahjarrat during the quest, they all become very angry with her because the rituals she instituted on false pretenses have brought their species
(4/7) to the brink of extinction. When one of them moves to strike Seren–though this would, of course, be an entirely futile against a being as powerful as she–Zaros interposes himself and blasts them all back with a shout. Including his own friends and followers. She then gets upset with him for sticking up for her: ‘Do not defend me, Zaros! You will never stand beside me again’. A few moments later, she finishes the thought, ‘I cannot stay here any longer, but this is not over between
(5/7) us, Zaros. Not this easily. You will pay for what you have done here. Mah’s death is on your hands, and while I still draw breath, I will stand against you’. Not super shippy on her part, obviously, but they do say that ‘Heaven hath no rage like love to hatred turned’. For his part, Zaros continues to defend her actions to the Mahjarrat after her departure. When the player explains to him that Mah was not fully dead when his ritual was complete, and that Seren was forced to put her
(6/7) out of her misery, he laments, 'Oh, sister… Seeing Mah like that must have caused her immense heartache. Her reaction is even more understandable after making that decision’. I went back to talk to him again after the quest and asked him how he felt about seeing Seren again, he responds, 'I was very glad. Does that surprise you? We are family. No matter our squabbles, seeing her whole again gives me hope that we may someday reconcile’. Supposedly Z and S will interact more in
(7/7) another recent quest, 'Sliske’s Endgame’; I will update you again when I find the time to complete it.
Thank you for updating us on the next part of Seren and Zaros’ story. Even though I only know of them from what you have described to me, I also feel a little disappointed that it wasn’t shippier. It seems like there might have been more that was suggestive, just based on what else we know about their relationship. But at least Zaros still loves her so deeply even when she is at odds with him. 
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shadowtongued · 7 years
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Meta: GALRA and similarities that Galra and Mahjarrat share.
send me a topic to write a meta about my muse on(no rly plz. almost anything is fair game. even grody/gory/immoral/nsfw shit. help me world-build a species/character with like hardly any lore)
forewarning: not all answers to this meme are canon, some is headcanon based on personal interpretation. differing opinions are a welcome thing here/on this blog.
blue, this is the fucking best question :,,)c , i s 2 g . this right here is one of the main reasons i NEED™ to sit down and write out a VLD verse bc, tbh, there are A LOT of similarities. some i probably haven’t even thought of yet.
i had waaaay too much fun with this. this was a fuckin’ 10/10 question.
- both are very warlike. galra more militaristically so, but mahjarrat parallel in the factor that where there’s a fight, there’s a chance they are interested. their whole home environment of freneskæ was essentially ‘if you survive maturity, congrats. you’re still eligible to die in a rejuvenation ritual for the better of us all. make sure you contribute to an enervation ( their breeding ritual ) so we don’t go extinct. no one really cares about what you think about it all.’ i have a feeling they would agree whole heartedly with zarkon’s statement of ‘weakness is an infection’ and the galran concept of ‘success or death’. they make it pretty culturally obvious through their rituals that only the strongest get to move their species forward and it’s super canon that despite the factor there is >10 mahjarrat left ( RIP what’s left of my baby boy tbfh post-endgame), those >10 are very intimidating and powerful through years of culling and being the winners. put it this way, unintentional genetic/natural selection took place and even their rituals ( which was stated after they were introduced, they literally built their culture around the rituals ) are super political; post-zaros’ banishment/post zamorak’s ascendancy and the factor that they SPLIT into two ‘political’ sides you win a fight and you kill the sacrificial kin/show your prowess over the others, you get to be closer to the ritual marker and get most of the energy. you drag ass and barely survive or just sit there and agree sycophantically with the others on a decision on who dies; you get to be in the back line and get just enough to get you through the next five centuries, sucks to be you. should have shown off and taken a risk.
- i’m not in the recent season yet, but from spoilers, i get the feeling in the past before the current paladins, zarkon/some galra were decently peaceful. which is cute. it kinda makes me realize before seren ( look, i love her but her choices had a huge impact : ((( ) showed them the rituals in order to preserve mah ( mother mah the stunted elder god who created both zaros, seren, and the four tribes, is by far my favorite ) the mahjarrat and other tribes were probably nothing more than little, confused nomadic people, worshiping their creator, who were probably hardly violent, if at all. seren’s implications of using the rituals to find a balance between the safety of mother mah and the four tribe’s population/creation to cycle energy between them all went haywire and ended up breeding hatred, spite, and hostility between each other, even what ‘family bonds’ they have are very, very fucking shoddy ( i.e; they aren’t above sending their relatives to slaughter: zemo turning on his cousin lucien ). it’s much like the headcanons i adore from you and your friends where some galra have no problem assassinating each other if they want a military rank freed up for thier possible taking.
- physiology wise? it’s not really too fuckin’ mentioned/paid much mind in RS but some mahjarrat look super fucking different from each other ( uhhh, pre-god, mahjarrat legatus zamorak has totally different horns than most of them and hardly any skull ridges ), hazeel bby obviously doesn’t count with his Massive Horns™ because he’s a Transformer: Mahserrat in Disguise, but some mahjarrat really look like they can physically differ a lot for being one tribe, out of four ( unless there actually was some form of breeding between tribes before they all in unison decided to Hate Each Other, we just don’t fucking know lore wise when it comes to pre-ritual/early freneskæ life ). just like how there are so many different galra traits, mahjarrat in RS kinda are streamlined for the sake of just….. being lazy and reskinning facial models, but i’m very sure and headcanon that some of them look vastly different from each other. i mean look at fucking azzy’s goddamn glorious chinspikes compared to the rest of them. look at how fucking towering at 8″ zemo and lucien are to the average 7″ of the rest. look at how only certain ones, sliske included, have more pronounced, horn like first ridges on their skulls. look at how some have one crystal in their forehead, and some have a whopping four or more. BREATHES DIRECTLY ONTO AND KEESES THIS CONCEPT ART OF MOST OF THEM.  i could go on. but in short, they have a lot of various species traits like galra. i love it. i love them both. they both have fucking wicked teeth and eyes. i’m 100% sure most galra could look at sliske/any mahjarrat and go ‘what fucking hairless subspecies are you?’ sans his obvious obnoxious yet fantastic taste in clothing, he physically might fit in**. low key strokes those stripes, don’t get me started. ** also, uh, there are so many inconsistencies in RS lore/concept art, i don’t at all accept that slissy has a fucking Stereotypical Villain Goatee™ in my linked fav artwork. he has nice chinspikes, not facial hair…. mahj just…. don’t…. fucking…. have hair. it’s not canon to me personally. we don’t talk abt that inconsistency, just like i refuse to believe in his horrendous endgame model and 360 personality change…… endgame sliske who???? who’s that??? i don’t know him??? n e ways…..
- they both can rely on energy sources: quintessence and the raw elder energy. galra can survive without it obviously versus mahjarrat very fucking much having a need for it lest they become skeletal and not as powerful. but it’s still neato they can absorb that tasty energy. 
- this is half baked and more of my yelling at a screen, but the druids totally, straight up, without a doubt, reminded me of mahjarrat. i remember just seeing that first fight between keith and the druid and later shiro with haggar and yelling in my room. the teleporting. the magic use. THE FUCKING SHAPESHIFTING AND ILLUSIONS. all of that is hallmark mahjarrat strats and i was just sitting there like (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و !!!! 
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