#*THROWS AND RUNS AWAY*

[justpenguin]

Note: smut post; minors DNi

...

Men who'd still try to squeeze their fat cock into your soaking, little cunny even as it tightens so hard and tries to push their length out. Just relax, mkay? They promise to make you feel real good >>>

-- boothill, wriothesley, alhaitham, childe, gallagher, jingyuan, neuvillette, zhongli, blade + any of ur favs

[fandomsleaveuemotionallyscarred]

The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Scale a Garden Wall

"Ugh! Who was the genius who put a wall this high to protect a garden?" Shuri huffed.

It was her. She was the genius.

But as her repeated attempts at scaling the wall that surrounded the garden of the heart shaped herb, continued to yield poor results Shuri was growing increasingly agitated.

"I will get over this wall! So help me Bast" She announced placing her foot on one of the ivy branches and began climbing.

Shuri could feel the ivy giving underneath her. How were these plants not able to carry her weight? She was such a tiny thing, it was a wonder how she stayed on the ground when a strong breeze blew her way.

Surely these plants should be considered a shame to their kind. Either that or the ridiculous garb she had on was to blame. After all, the corset really was very uncomfortable.

"Miss?" Came a voice from behind her.

"OH great just what she needed! a witness!" She mumbled

"Miss? What are you doing" the voice asked, the deep timbre and heavy Talokanil accent marking the person as a Talokanil man.

"Nothing" She replied simply, before placing her foot on the next branch.

"I think you are doing something"

"I am not"

"Yes you are" the voice challenged

"I am doing nothing! And if you could kindly leave me to my nothing and go and wait inside with the rest of the wolves"

The ivy finally gave causing Shuri to fall, but seeing as she had only made it up all of two feet she was able to land on her two feet.

"Ugh! These vines are too weak!" She exclaimed dusting her hands off

"Miss what are you doing?" The voice asked again.

Shuri realized that if she didn't answer his questions he man would remain so she told him

"If you must know I am trying to ascertain the best way to make it over the garden wall"

"And why is that?"

"Well I want to see what the view is like from the other side- I am running away genius!" Shuri called back sarcastically

She remained with her back to the stranger, her mind still trying to calculate how to get up to the top of the wall.

"Won't people notice you are missing?" The man asked

"I'm sure they won't"

"May I ask why you are running away?" He asked.

Perhaps Shuri was so engrossed in her mission but something possessed her to answer him

"Because I think he may be a beast"

"A beast?" Came the confused reply

"Or a troll! Or a mutant with elf ears and wings on his ankles!" Shuri continued

"Wings on his- who are you talking about?" The stranger questioned

Shuri huffed a laugh "That is none of your business random person"

The stranger grew quiet perhaps he was stunned by her responses or perhaps he had left.

Shuri dared a glance behind her, the man was still there. He was staring at her, an amused expression on his handsome face. Shuri turned her attention back to the wall, there was no point in lingering on the handsome stranger whose eyes seemed to burn through her, not when she was betrothed and trying to escape.

"It's the King of Talokan, the Kuk'ul'kan or whoever he is" She pulled on the vines again, before finishing, "I think he might be a beast"

"So beast or troll, what he looks like matters?" The man asked

"I don't care what he looks like!" She turned to face him then, "What I do care about is not knowing and no one will speak of him so therefore he must be a beast or a troll!"

The stranger chuckled, "Or a mutant with elf ears and wings on his ankles?" He said,  his dark eyes lighting up with humor and what looked to Shuri like interest, but she did not want dwell on that.

"Exactly! So if you excuse me!" Shuri returned her gaze to the wall and finally an idea struck her, the stranger was a little taller than her and his physique looked well enough

"Yes! Do you see there?" She cried, gesturing to a crack in the wall just out of her height range.

"I believe that with a boost I can make it over the garden wall"

"You want me to help you?" He asked voice tinged with disbelief

"Yes! Please now hurry! Just take hold of my waist and lift and I'll do the rest" Shuri explained.

"Princess, I have no intention of helping you" came the strangers reply

Shuri once again turned to face the man. Angered by his refusal to help her.

"I am a lady in distress!" She chastised, putting her hands on her hips

"You refuse to help a lady in distress?"

Then she realized "Wait! Princess? I never told you who I was" she accused.

"That is true you didn't"

The man drew himself up to his full height, cocking his head to one side. The movement seemed smug and the smirk on his face even more so.

Shuri was beginning to become regret the fact she ever considered him handsome

"I refuse to help" he spoke taking a step towards Shuri

"When that lady is trying to climb over a garden wall" he continued moving closer and closer until he had Shuri had backed up against the wall. He had her pinned with his gaze and Shuri felt her face grow warm at the attention.

"So that she does not have to marry me" he finished, whispering the last bit in her ear. Shuri refused to shiver she would bot give him the satisfaction.

It now seemed to Shuri, like there was no air left in the garden. Which her scientific mind told her was ridiculous because trees create oxygen and so if anything the garden was full of it.

No her breathless has everything to do with the handsome, dark eyed, brown skinned man who had her backed up against a wall, in literally every way.

The King of Talokan

The Kuk'ul'kan

Namor

Her future husband.

✖✖✖✖✖✖✖✖✖✖✖✖✖✖✖✖✖✖

Well I said I would do it... and it's late but there I've done it!

The Seaprincess x Queen Sophie Bridgerton Au

The fact that I was only able to write this at 1 am (after writing a punishment essay from my boss) is got to be the most hilarious thing ever.

She can write but she can't do it on command🤣🤣

[thetoastedalmonds]

because I have writers block here's a compilation of sassquill in my fic

Below the cut has unreleased chapter spoilers!!

[sweetpotatofries-wat]

[lambment]

Are we still friends? can we be friends?

[sunderberry]

and angel was so proud of himself for being able to carry mr-hollow-bones husk over here

based on the hc where husk died from falling, and that's why his demon form is an ironic mix between two animals that should not be taking fall damage

so yeah he's afraid of heights and that's why he doesn't fly

aftermath:

they'll be okay

[nibeul]

libs are so damn annoying, if you have to choose one guy to “protect democracy”, your democracy is fucking dead. “If there is an election where you are forced to pick between two evils, then it’s your duty to pick the lesser evil” if there’s an election where you are forced to pick between two evils, then it’s your duty to rid of the system that’s producing them in the first place

[hua-liansimp]

Actually wondering how long would it have taken Hua Cheng to confess without his Fanart Cave being discovered.

[dewinabsentia]

whenever the ghouls sneeze, their element pops off ever so slightly. rain sneezes, the faucet trickles. cumulus sniffles, some papers slide off the table. it’s not very troublesome, even with dew, the most he ever does is light a candle or singe a leaf on one of mountain’s plants. but swiss. swiss, much like his multi elemental ability, is a wildcard. he’s popped lightbulbs, thrown open locked doors, froze an entire pot of freshly brewed coffee completely solid. some caffeine loving ghouls are still holding a grudge over that one. and phantom, ever the instigator, finds this endlessly entertaining. if he’s bored, he’ll light a candle that he knows will get swiss sneezing. the rest of the ghouls have taken to banning anything labeled “rose scented” from the den.

[maomango-doodle]

Jazz puns, am I right?

Some random doodles

[lostagoodcigar]

Brought to you by a tiktok where this guy was talking abt a girl he was seeing and how every time they had sex she’d give him a little treat afterwards (like a lil candy bar)

Like it starts when you jokingly toss Johnny one of the chocolates you had sitting on your nightstand after he ate you out like his life depended on it- he eats the candy immediately obviously as he laughs

Then you end up with a little candy dish on the nightstand, or in the drawer, any time you and Johnny have sex you give him a piece of candy, throw him a bone so to speak. Not on purpose but you think it’s cute- the way his face lights up when given the candy

You find yourself fucking somewhere in the house that isn’t the bedroom? Johnnys right behind you as you make your way to your shared room for his treat, not even realizing he’s doing it.

Whether you forget on purpose or on accident one day he just kinda stands in the kitchen like a kicked puppy and, “didn’t do somethin’ to upset ya did I hen?” His head tilted to the side slightly.

“What? No- what do you mean?” You are genuinely confused until he mumbles a “didn’t get my treat- ya know-“

You have to stop yourself from laughing as you ruffle his slightly overgrown mohawk before you’re off to the bedroom to toss him his little candy.

Honorable mention: I’d like to think Johnnys somehow ended up explaining this to the others, maybe just Ghost at first. And Ghost immediately understands it and is thankful his smile is covered by his balaclava- leave it to Johnny to get himself trained like a good dog

Basically what im trying to say is doing this to Soap would have him so down bad I think

[skeletoninthemelonland]

A human that looks like a robot,

And a robot that looks like a human

[samarecharm]

Ryuji having the worst bi crisis of his fucking life bc his mom just had to fucking ask “oh, whats this young ladys name?” when he showed her a picture of Akira petting Morgana. Like okay yeah Akira is like objectively pretty, hes like the Classic Delicate Pretty Boy just like Yusuke which is like whatever; straight dudes have eyes, and they know what women like to see. But now hes like. Seeing things he likes in girls IN Akira now and he cant make it Stop like its genuinely keeping him up at night 😭

Pretty boy used to be A Face that would come up in his mind when he thought of the term. There was no specifics in mind, just like. Pretty Boy. Pretty boy! You say that and theres like a Face Template that shows up in ur minds eye and hed just attribute that to any dude who was like Vaguely Pretty. But now its Akira 😭 and he finds himself cataloging things that Akira does that he KNOWS he finds cute when girls do it. The hairtuck behind the ears. The headtilt when he mishears a question. The Actually Pretty Doe Eyes. The breathy, nearly inaudible chuckle he does in place of a Real laugh (thats made better by the fact that its so hard to get him to laugh in the first place). He likes cute snacks. He blushes easily. Ryuji is sitting here like ‘theres no fucking way man. Like theres just no way. That shit makes NO sense (a lie)’ lying in bed in the middle of the night looking like this vvvv w his phone in his hands (looking at pictures of akira)

It drives him insane bc like he did Not see any of these things as like inherently girly or whatever. Like thats just akira thats just his bro! And he does OTHER weird shit that cancels all that shit out. Hes like a messy engineer/tinkerer, he rolls out of bed and whatever situation his hair is is everyones problem. He wears that AWFUL gym uniform and doesnt tweak it AT ALL?? He likes baseball?? hes got a whole binder of trading cards that he will show off if u show any moment of weakness. Like hes just Some Dude but also manages to be Some Girl at the same time and Ryuji is like thats not fair. Life sucked ass but at least it made sense before Akira stumbled into it 😭

[alfairy]

Nimona AU where Ballister and Nimona do leave the kingdom and go over the wall to find a new safe home. Years pass. The kingdom is more paranoid than ever because the queen killer and the monster were never caught and could presumably still live among them or return to cause more chaos.

The director decides one day that they need to take the fight to the monsters, strike first before they are stricken again. Knights are sent out beyond the wall to search the surrounding land and burn down the woods in order to “smoke the monsters out.” Destroying everything, trying to fight a monster that was never even there.

During one of these instances, Ambrosius and Ballister finally see each other again face to face for the first time in years since that fateful interaction at the institution. They’ve both changed, physically at least; Ambrosius’ hair is longer, Bal’s got some more grey streaks and a new arm upgrade. But underneath all of that they’re still the same, still got that lingering hurt and romantic feelings. Nimona is still the same as ever and hasn’t aged a day.

(Also idea that maybe there’s other small communities and people living outside the wall that Bal and Nimona ended up quietly settling down in. People who are far more open minded and accepting of others, and who are more concerned about the walled off kingdom with guns pointing at them than this nice guy and his cool daughter. That’s their neighbor and they’re not gonna let some knights storm in and cause trouble for him.)

[juniebug113]

AHHHHH be nice!!!!!!!!!!! i'm being brave here!!!

[queenie-ofthe-void]

A Desperate Fool - Part 1

written for @steddiemicrofic

Prompt: 'fool' | wc: 454 | rated: T | cw: hurt/no comfort, break-up

~~~

“Stevie, baby, please answer the door,” Eddie begs just as the front door bursts open to reveal Robin Buckely in all her righteous fury.

“You need to leave,” she says, and god, he’s never heard her sound so cold before.

“No Robin, please, you don’t understand. I’ve been a complete f-”

“Fucking asshole?” Robin spits.

“Well,” Eddie sheepishly replies, “I was going to say fool, but, yeah.”

“Fool is a bit of an understatement, don’t you think? It’s been almost a year, and you just show up?" Her hands are white-knuckled and shaking, like she’s physically restraining herself from attacking him. Eddie’s pretty sure he'd deserve it. "How did you even find our new place?”

Up and coming rockstar money certainly has its perks, so he hired a PI.

“I asked Dustin,” he lies.

“No,” Robin cuts him off, “no you didn’t. The kids would never betray his trust.”

Not like you did rings unspoken. 

Months worth of tears finally spill over, a small sob wrenching his body forward. He harshly rubs his face in an attempt to ground himself. Gathering his breath, he looks up again to find Robin glaring, hard and unyielding.

“Robin please,” he sobs, leaning to glance around her, desperate to catch a glimpse of the boy he left behind. “I just want to talk to him. I need to tell him how sorry I am. I regret everything. All of it. I never should’ve said what I said or did what I did.”

“Oh!” she rages. “Do you mean when you celebrated your first big show by ditching Steve and hooking up with some rando in the bathroom?”

She’s yelling now, stepping out onto the front stoop to crowd his space. People are starting to gather on the sidewalk, among them a group of girls with their phones out, recording everything. 

This could ruin him. His reputation, future gigs, possibly the band as a whole. 

He doesn’t care. It’s his reckoning.

“Or, was it after he moved out and you threw a massive drunken doxxing bitchfest on TikTok and said– how did it go again?”

Her voice drops to mock his own ”’a rockstar can’t be seen dating a normie, suburban, ex-high school jock who’s only bullshit dream is to raise kids. That’s just bad for business.’”

“I didn’t mean any of it,” he whispers.

“I don’t care,” Robin says, voice hard and resigned. “You cheated. You embarrassed him publicly. Then you left without a word. Now I need to you to get off my porch and kindly fuck off.” 

Robin steps backwards into the townhome, and just as she’s slamming the door in his face, Eddie swears he sees a flash of chestnut hair and wet hazel eyes.

~~~

Part 2

Homesick on ao3