#*cuts to video of a distraught Bruce looking at Clark’s phone where Clark has a map of the US up* | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

raeofgayshine · 2 years

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Bruce Wayne, drunk and full on Brucie mood in the middle of a gala: You know, that accent doesn’t really fit in around here. It’s cute. Where are you from?

Clark, internally debating every life choice that led him to this moment: I’m from Smallville. Kansas.

Bruce, leaning closer to Clark with a flirty smile: Oh you’re cute and funny. You know, I like that in a man.

Clark, very confused but trying to just go along with it: Thank you??

Bruce: I mean, everyone knows that Kansas isn’t real but I do always enjoy a good laugh.

Clark: What.

Bruce: What? Everyone knows that Kansas was made up for Wizard of Oz.

Clark, unsure if Bruce is fucking with him or if he’s just really deep into this dumb act: Bruce, Kansas is a real place. It’s one of the 50 states that make up America.

Bruce, tilting his head a little confused: There’s 50 states? Since when?

#ravenpuff rambles #bruce wayne #Clark Kent #incorrect batman quotes #incorrect batfamily quotes #superbat #if you want to read it like that I mean Bruce is definitely flirting with Clark #and annoying him at the same time but really that’s just their relationship #anyways shout out to my sister who texted me ‘You think Bruce pretends Kansas isn’t real to annoy Clark?’#haven’t been able to stop thinking about that since then #The thing is Bruce absolutely went into this as just a way to fuck with Clark but he got drunk and maybe leaned in a bit too hard #and then the next thing he knows he’s waking up to the news story ‘Bruce Wayne shocked to find out Kansas is real’#*cuts to video of a distraught Bruce looking at Clark’s phone where Clark has a map of the US up*#‘See there’s Kansas’#Bruce: ‘My whole life has been a lie?’ *looks to the camera* ‘Dick Dick did you know that Kansas was *real*’#Dick snickering: ‘Yeah B they taught us that in school’#Bruce: ‘Why didn’t anyone tell me?’#His kids never fucking let him live it down nor do any of them believe Bruce when he tries to defend himself and say he knew Kansas was real #all along. They just pat his arm and go ‘Sure you did B’#Brucie Wayne my beloved himbo of a man

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