#... unless he's drunk

[ysaefinn]

Knight!Suguru x bratty!royal!reader

Okay then, I hear you loud and clear.

Sit with me and think of a royal reader that is the middle ground. Scheming but there's definitely a generous amount of attitude for spice. A brat.

But oh does it work wonders for you, most times. Leaning on a hip, arms crossed, eyebrow raised like whatever outrageous demands you've just made were your god given right, yours just as the crown. The harsh flashing light reflecting off your jewels works like a brain-melting hypnosis. "Yes, your highness!" "But of course, your highness!" "As you please your highness!" Ah- Music to your ears. The world at the palm of your hand.

Hmmm but only most times. Your knight seems to be immune to your spell.

Suguru has made it crystal clear the very first time you tried pulling one of your trusty reliable tricks.

Hands on your hips, rolling your eyes, and teasing him about being 'Oh so cruel' and 'not knowing how to have fun' when he stood between you and the kitchen window you tried sneaking out of in the middle of the night. Unmoving like a brick wall with a polite little smile that could melt gold on his undeniably handsome features– one you wouldn't say you could confidently read. The moonlight contouring his beastly build.

He looks like a big bad hound watching over the gates, his no was as polite as can be, but it was absolute. –Alright then change of strategy–

Batting your eyelashes. One delicate finger slowly creeps up his chest. His breath visibly hitches and he looks almost enamored, clearly lost in the attention. Great! Time to go for the kill! You get on your tippy toes, faces mere inches away from each other. And with the sweetest tone you could muster, you begin "Won't you let me get my way just this once?" A second, another, Suguru is heavily breathing then he... smiles-! Wider than he usually would before placing a big arm over the small of your back. Perfect! He's definitely in your pocket no–OhHuh?! With a swift move, he throws you over his shoulder and starts making his way to your sleeping chambers. "Nice try, but I'm afraid I can't overlook this in particular. Their majesties' orders, I'm very sorry Your Highness. It's quite late after all, we wouldn't want you to miss out on any sleep, now would we?"

Un-be-lievable. Absolutely outrageous. But you swear the heat and redness of your face were results of being caught off guard, nothing much!

It's quite frustrating really. Seems you've met your match. But if anything, it just clears your doubts. From the moment you shook hands with your newly appointed guard do– body guard –ever so thoughtfully appointed by the Monarch–You figured that he won't be so willing to join your endless collection of marionettes. It makes your eye twitch really. You've always been the child who threw tantrums when your noble playmates wouldn't hand over their toys despite having mountains of trinkets already. He is an exception, the enemy of absolute control. A threat, but one that you can't deny is very very enticing.

He wouldn't flat out tell you to act right of course! Perish the thought, he was but a servant! You hold the cards! You are the hand that swings the sword! But he'll find ways. He's very indulging and sweet –it honestly feels sincere– but his messages are received nonetheless.

A sweet gentle smile always present as he tuts and politely reminds you to cut your lady in waiting some slack. To go easy on your maids for misplacing one of your countless rings. To turn a blind eye on the very miniscule alteration made to your breakfast. Maybe he oversteps every now and then. A weird look; a raised eyebrow; a little snicker. The most he has ever gone was playfully threatening to 'tell your father how bad you were being if you kept acting up' not like the king isn't at the palm of your hand as well. But still.

Audacious.

It's like his heart is armored as well!! Why doesn't he listen? Why doesn't anything work? Everyone else is mindlessly dancing to your tune so you know for a fact you haven't lost your magic just yet. What's so different about this man? How does he not only manage to stay untouched but also leave a clear mark on you back?

You almost want to obey, to be good, maybe you'll even get a reward if you let yourself fall into his arms. What if he lets you run your hands over his strong arms and feel up his firm body you've always been so curious about? What if you get the chance to touch his long gorgeous inky hair? What if he lets you doze off on his soft ches-

...

This cannot be happening.

Seems it can though. It didn't take you too long to recognize the longing look in his eyes, clear boundaries were never set, blurred lines were his gateway, and you knew love when you saw it. Before you know it you were inviting him to spend the night with you almost on the daily, kissing him on empty halls, pressing your entire body against him while holding his bicepts during your walks in the garden, he'd hold you in his lap under the shade of tree deep in the woods away from prying eyes, pluck fresh fruit off the trees and hand freed them to you slice by dutiful slice, he replaces your heavy crowns with lighter softer alternatives made with flowers.

He even promised to marry you.

Lovers or not, he will always be your knight. And you were his to serve, his to protect.

And his to correct, on occasion.

It was his fault really. This was bound to happen eventually. Nothing is set in stone and the crown heir must prove themselves worthy –Something you excelled at. It was something he admired you for, truly! You're clever, very aware of your strengths and use them to your advantage, the perfect leader, he loved you for it...just not now.

A shiny carriage from the west arrives early in the morning. Out emerges a new shiny toy, a prince gift wrapped in silks and gold –you always loved shiny. The royal foreigner makes his way not to your father, not your mother, but directly to you. And Suguru might be a brute good-for-nothing soldier, but it doesn't take a genius to put the pieces together, this is the suitor your parents have chosen for you. The firstborn prince of esteemed royal birth, from a country that is nothing to scoff at, of course, this is happening. A marriage of convenience to strengthen the bonds between the nations someting something the fishing industry isn't what it used to–Oh piss off.

Suguru is right at your side when the obnoxiously sparkling man finally comes to a stop before you, he is right there beside you when he holds your gloved hand and places a kiss at your knuckles, and he is right there when you –without missing a beat– giggle at the gesture and bat your lashes right back at him.

Suguru's body freezes, then his jaw clenches and snaps back to place and he can't help but snarl.

Guard dog. One in dire need of a leash.

He knows you have no choice but to play along, he knows that you marrying another man is the most likely outcome. But he is selfish enough not to care, he wants to pull you close by the waist, tuck you underneath his chin and send the envoy back to wherever he came from. He is your knight, and you are just as much his. It wouldn't have been a problem if this were only one of your many masterful performances, he wouldn't have minded much. What you have with Suguru was real, not a business move, not a transaction.

But it still itches at his core.

No matter how many times you reassure him that it was all fake, no matter how many times he pins you the walls of your room and makes you repeat declarations of love, no matter how much you promise that you'll get rid of the foreign prince, that you'll get in your father's head, that you'll do something, anything. Suguru is still very much bothered.

It's never enough, nothing puts him at ease. Every time you finish a conversation with a kiss to his forehead and walk away to be with that other man, it feels as if Suguru's wounds were stitched without taking away all of the cancer. It never mattered whether it was real or not. Suguru is a selfish man, and a greedier lover.

And you came to find this out after an incredibly inappropriate night of wine and poetry with your supposed future husband.

Come on. You were pushing it at this point. How could you think he wouldn't be feining to claw into your newest toy by now?

But poor you. Couldn't have been caught at a worse time. Frustrated from having to shush an aggressive snarling attack dog on an almost daily basis and being a little tipsy from the alcohol, clearly having forgotten your manners near the empty bottles of wine before coming back to your real man, you waste no time tearing into him about how whiny and needy he has been, how he has no basis to any of these accusations he's throwing around so carelessly, how it shouldn't even bother him this much anyway as he is nothing but a servant to you, and that he should to act like one.

His to protect. His to serve. His to correct.

So...act like a servant? Your word is law, Your Highness!

You don't know how or when exactly you found yourself pinned to the wall with your wrists tightly held together and dwarfed by one big hand, while the other tightly grips your tummy keeping you frozen in place.

"W-what do you think you're doing-?!" "Act like one, huh?" He moves to kiss you all messy and rough, for the first time in weeks, undoing all the progress that pest may think he had made.

He pulls away leaving you warm and needy.

"S-Suguru I'm–"

"Be quiet" he snaps, yet he doesn't raise his voice, he sounds calm and controlled, but Oh so betrayed. You've possibly done irreversible damage to the man who adores you most."You've said enough, listen to me very closely" his glaring hurts so good this is a new side of him you aren't too guilty you lured out of the shadows. "Whether or not you'd like to admit it. I am your man." It sounds more like a judge's verdict than a knight's oath.

"I'm not one of your little toys. I'm your husband" and it sounds so right, you didn't know how much you needed to hear it.

"But sure. I'll indulge you, Your Highness." but this felt like a slap to the face in all honesty, you worked really hard to get him to use your name, the title was only a little bit between the two of you at this point, but he has never said it with more venom than now.

"I'll act like your knight once more, and teach you some manners."

[lace-tf]

daily koss #7 … 2025.02.24 … bsky

they’re there for the free energon 🤦

[wispforever]

they already got the party platter actually. it came with enough alcohol for ten people

[itsbebebrainrotting]

As the time of Pangi going to Brighton comes closer... I'm thinking of how they said they might be in fireball Friday together.... Bebe they're already so giggly around each other.... Then drunk.... 🚬🚬🚬

Oh god mika I forgot about the potential Pangkey Fireball Friday 🚬🚬🚬🚬 I can only imagine that they will reach levels of rpf, giggliness and obnoxiousness never before thought possible... I am NOT ready

[pvlvsdog]

how easy or hard is it to make the sinners finish? also are you fine with yandere stuff? I want to ask before requesting. Also if your requests aren’t open then feel free to ignore.

Oh my! I made a whole tier list with a friend^^ just need to pull it up. Over half the credit goes to the skinny dipping ask anon, haiii^^ also I’m all good with yandere stuff. I just might have difficulty with certain characters (base ID for Greg to name one, that might not be very long if I’m asked to write something about him; I’ll still write about him, but there’s not a lot to work with for the yandere theme in my eyes) but I will absolutely write it^^ also you will get bonus characters. Because it’s fun^^

TW: 18+, UNEDITED

Not finishing (sorry!):

Faust - sorry but I don’t think she ever came during sex. You can use toys or she can do the job herself and that works, but that’s it honestly. It’s not that you’re doing something wrong, she’s still choosing to spend time with you in that way, but I just think she would finish from touching herself. After all Faust knows Faust the best

Takes a long while:

Ryoshu - it’s not hard to make her finish but if you rush it, she won’t react well. It’s a whole process, getting to that first orgazm. She likes playing around before it, holding it off until she’s satisfied with the act. Like, she won’t ignore you in favour of her pleasure, she wants the both of you to get the most out of this. Which means neither of you is finishing quick, sorry

Sonya - also not that easy. He’s a chill guy, he doesn’t seem like he would mind. He likes you and it was a decent time either way, so it’s not a big issue if he didn’t come. I just feel like, despite his easygoing demeanour, if anything from the book carries over to the game, he miiight have a hard time letting himself be vulnerable during sexual encounters. Participates still, but it’s not a carefree ordeal and it makes orgasming harder. Can use his hand just fine though and doesn’t consider it a wasted night

Demian - kinda hard. Like, I just feel like it would be hard for him to reach a release, but he’d be damned if he still didn’t try. He’s fairly confident and knows himself well, so he has no problem guiding you a little so both of you can orgasm. With his tips it’s not really hard. Side note, but I feel like the experience you’d get is worth it, come on, in the book he’s such an agent of chaos it’s iconic. Yeah he’s calm. But like, if I asked that man to tie my shoes he could as well run off with my shoelaces to prove some point he made earlier hhh

Last above average:

Verg - kinda hard? Like, it’s easier than with the ones above, but you will have to put some effort into pleasing him. He’s guarded and keeps most at an arm’s length so to have a genuine sexual encounter with you, he needs to trust and know you a bit. I don’t think he would be a 10/10 at communicating so you also wouldn’t have a lot to go off of. It changes with time, the communication part, but he still takes a bit to finish

Ishmael - she takes some time as well. I think she’s pretty experienced and has had many amazing as well as mediocre encounters so given that range, don’t expect to just waltz into her room and make her scream your name upon your touch. Good thing is, she has a good idea about what works, just take her suggestions and you’ll get there (she’ll do to ;3). Other component could be the fact that she often doesn’t feel comfortable letting her guard down and not being in control. So, especially if you’re more dominant, I could see some issues stemming from that early on, because as open as she would be to give things a try, if you’re a more dominant person, it could be difficult for her to work with. Not your fault, just give her some time. In bed and outside of it

Hong Lu - I can’t explain it much, I just think it’s not super easy as well. Again, you won’t have him panting and moaning just from doing the bare minimum, but let our curious man explore, make it worth a while, and he’ll reach an orgasm at his pace

Kromer - takes a bit too. She’s pretty horny with a high sex drive but she likes to have her time with you. Likes that you have you to try a bit before she’ll come too

Standard timing 😌😌:

Dante - i feel like they have a pretty average timing. Perhaps it would be faster but they overthink a bit and it’s all a little bit „new”. They don’t even fully know (or well, remember) what they like so that also plays a role. Again, it’s easier than with the characters above but they don’t come super fast

Yi Sang - also pretty much within what you would expect, you have to get him a bit worked up, it’s not as long of a process as it is with some other sinners, but definitely enough for you two to get a bit creative with the foreplay and such

Meursault - I think we just figured getting him placed in the middle of the tier is just funny considering his demeanour. That man is the standard, the average, the perfect representation of the mean. Sex with him definitely isn’t vanilla, I just think he finishes at a very predictable timing, never having you too worked up but also not rushing it

Hopkins - adding him as a silly bonus, I just think it’s funny he stuck in my brain. He also takes a pretty expected amount of time, he has to have some solid foreplay but it’s not like, really hard for you to get him to finish. Just let him have his fun first

Fairly easy:

Don - if you know where her „weaknesses” lay (and it’s not a difficult thing, she’s pretty obvious, I think. Again, I’m keeping in mind how easily she gave herself away when she was questioned about her feelings on being beaten up in CIII, that woman was stuttering like crazy. So like, just go for whatever flusters her and that’s your cue as to what you should do during sex) it’s a very short road from there to having her orgasm. Being easily excitable seems to seep into that part of her life as well :3

Rodya - she knows herself well and is used to putting herself first (since life taught her that if you don’t, nobody else might. Not so say she isn’t a generous person when she can, but like, it is often something she does for attention or praise in general, I think sex is a bit of a different case) so her objective is to have a good time. It might change as you two grow closer, but for the main part she just uses her own knowledge in what gets her off and works from there. Not saying you don’t have to put any work in on your part, but she will make it very easy. If she wants to have sex with you, at least before you two get closer, it’s so that she can have a release, so that will be her main priority. She’ll be nice to you sure, she knows how to be sweet and charming, even when there’s sweat rolling down her face and her back is arching while she adjusts your hands to grip her just right. But before she’s ready to be vulnerable, the sex is more so to fulfil her needs (coming, feeling important, so on) than to grow closer to you

Outis - my funny explanation is “fast but only if you’re Dante” but my actual reasoning for saying that she would be rather quick to finish is that I think it’s been so long and she’s so pent up that it just makes sense. Like, she’s not about to ask for sex from just anyone, she ignores that need too much. So when she finally has sex with you, oh, she clearly means it and has been wanting to do so for a very long time. All in all, she’s on the brink anyways so getting her off is a very easy task

Gregor - that man is starved and kind of easily… well affected by your actions, let’s say. He has no real experience with being desired by someone so you don’t have to try much to get him worked up. Your honest advances and the way you treat him oftentimes leave him exasperated (he can’t believe over the half of things you’re saying, especially given that he would probably make you aware how his modifications will affect any intimate relationship you might want to have with him), but he’d be lying if he said that whatever you were doing wasn’t working. Like, he’s not surprised he’s into it, he just can’t believe that you would want to make such advances towards him in the first place. Honestly if it wasn’t for his self deprecation and fear of hurting you, he’d be on the bottom tier. But those dark thoughts accompany him even when he’s being intimate (or, well, especially then) so he’s still only somewhat below average. He probably blames it on his stamina (which also could be a factor, he’s not as senile as he makes himself out to be but he certainly does struggle keeping up in bed) and probably mumbles something about being “too old for this” and how “you’re going to end him if you keep doing things like this” (his very roundabout way of saying that you affect him greatly). So, with all that in mind, he doesn’t last very long. The only thing keeping him from coming undone upon your touch is concern for your safety should his body act up because of the strong emotions you cause him to feel

Gotta go fast (sorry):

Heathcliff - not sorry about putting him in this category, only sorry for the joke. I mean, that man is pent up, worked up and so, so oblivious to his own feelings that you won’t be having any troubles with making him come. I mean, for the past few years he dedicated himself to the thought of what could (or in this case - couldn’t) be and his ability to reflect and own up to the fact that you’re making him feel a very specific kind of way is hindered as a result. That man could get a raging boner every time you touch him and he still would hold off on reflecting on his feelings. So when he’s finally in a position to have sex with you, you will have him all worked up in record time. Heaving, panting with drops of sweat rolling down his forehead. He desires you greatly, even if he has a hard (hihi) time admitting that (well, that would mean that his whole… thing was a waste of time and also would call into question if he was ever wanted by the person he’s been chasing this whole time, I mean, he couldn’t imagine having her act towards him in the same way you do. Which… well, he doesn’t love the thought). That and his lack of experience with all things sexual leads him to release around the time you’re trying to get started. He tries to last longer and he won’t leave you hanging if he doesn’t. Well… I can certainly tell you that he won’t. But he’s going to try anyways. Just don’t tease him about it, that might actually work in the opposite way. Or do tease him, if that’s what you’re into ;3

Sinclair - if you two getting heated, you’re already halfway done with making him come. He gets horny easily and fast, but usually (always, prior to meeting you probably) his hand has to do. And in the book he is quite filled with thoughts of pretty sexual nature (that are quite a cause of his shame). But insecurity and guilt play a part here too, making him believe that he doesn’t really deserve to experience nice things like that. So when you’re so close to him, something he fantasizes about quite often, it’s making him overwhelmed in the best, most alien way. All the thoughts that could hold him back are gone and instead he is overcome with lust. Which then leads to a very fast release. Just like Heath, I totally see him worked up, heaving and absolutely coming undone. Buuut with the way he is, I don’t think it’s just him being all shy and cumming cutely just to lay down and stutter out a ‘thank you’. That lad is filled with so much anger issues and unprocessed, strong emotions that what you are more likely to get is an extremely horny, awkward, rough encounter and after you blink he’s done and in the process of folding under the weight of post nut clarity (saying this lovingly, not to be biased as the author of this, but this is absolutely a ‘would’ for me. I just don’t think he’s what you would consider… conventionally “good”. Which is subjective, even if there is a ‘popular version’ of what good sex should look like)

[allastoredeer]

Have u heard about deers/elk/moose get absolutely fucked up drunk on apples…and the absolutely irony of radioapple being symbolised as🦌🍎…

Radioapple is so canon

I HAVE AND I AM OBSESSED WITH THIS NEW FACT.

I'm stuck between writing something about it, or drawing something about it. It's so so good. The image of Alastor getting drunk on apples, of all things, is too hilarious not to do something with.

[stew4]

NEVER FORGET RENARIN APPEARED ON PAGE BEFORE DALINAR DID. NEVER FORGET.

[alicentsaegon]

'Moon is goddess, wife of sun'

[elegy-for-the-present]

Intertwined

Rating: G Relationship: George Russell / Max Verstappen Fandom: Formula 1 RPF Words: 1551

"'It hurts to be something, it's worse to be nothing with you' - Promise by Laufey.

Mid season summer break. George and Max find themselves on the same island. On track and in the paddock, they are constantly mad at each other. Here, they are both tired and softer. Under the brilliant morning sun of August, they find comfort in each other."

This piece is inspired by one of my favorite fanart pieces, this one by @zazhitigertasha. I love this pose so, so much and I wanted to write something about it for a long while, I just couldn't figure out what scenario I wanted to put the boys in. I finally settled on some context and wrote this during the weekend. My favorite thing about the fanart is the simplicity of it, the cleanliness of the lines, and I tried to match this style by using short sentences and simple dialogue in the fic (couldn't resist a couple of metaphors, though). This is once again an emotional hurt/comfort type of fic, because it is my favorite thing to write. Thank you Tasha for your wonderful art!

[brokendreamscreation]

@alteregozowie cont.

“Hurray! Thank you, Alastor! I love experimenting with food and drinks too. I just made one actually. I call it “Lucid Dreams Float!” There’s no alcohol, but you think Husker would be interested in it too?”

[kalied0skull]

this was funnier to me than I'd like to admit

in reference to my @sodapopcurtis-dx-asks sodablog, i decided the only way to make fanart is to show off how often i beat up steve over there

now playing: American Pie - Don McLean ♪

★ mini-ramble under the cut !

I'd like to thank the podcast circle of fandoms for doing this to arthur lester & jonathan sims otherwise I'd have had no inspiration for this

the song in the title is just whatever was playing by the way 💀 absolutely had no significance here, good song though

when i was making this i thought two specific things

1. I don't hurt his legs enough, need to get to that more /j (/hj, i feel evil today)

and 2. people need to stop letting me BEAT THIS MAN, because when i started this I didn't think there'd be so much, until i was remembering everything and was like WAAAITTT A MINUTE ...

anyways I'll probably come back to this with updates every so often if i DO throw him around some more, but either way this was really funny documentation 💀

people who just don't know the lore i do on the sodablog are probably confused, but to me this makes perfect sense AND i probably missed a few things... but who knows

[h3llblazer]

❓What's your struggle meal? Like when you actually have to get off your ass, stop drinking and smoking for a min so you don't die of starvation, what do you eat?

No.

[xxplastic-cubexx]

How do you think mags would act drunk?

a silly fellow ........

[spikyiwaizumi]

there is a canon to dick ratio you must adhere to to give credibility to a fic. for instance, rationally, I don’t think kuroo would smoke but I’m giving into my dick on this one. because I think it’s hot. but because of that I have to characterise him correctly in other instances or it’ll all fall flat. some fic writers may choose to write with all canon-adjacent stuff, some may choose to lean more heavily into what their dick wants. I respect both but I like to toe the line . respect the balance, if you will