#09x10: one to go

[hollygl125]

Sara Sidle + Gil Grissom + “i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart).” (*)

“You know I love you. I feel I’ve loved you forever.”

“One to Go” (09x10) // “Immortality” (16) @pscentral event 35: parallels

Insp. (x) + (x)

[ani-coolgirl]

So let's talk about Road Trip (09x10) for a minute!

They've toyed around with this since their introduction, but I'm not a fan of the angel torturer thing. Not that he exists--Heaven has been sketchy since day one--but that he talks/acts/sounds like a demon. I really thing Heaven and Hell's versions of cruelty should come off as different. Heaven should have a more "just following orders" angle to it. The idea of them torturing for kicks annoys me. In DnD terms, I wish Heaven overall was portrayed more as Lawful Evil. They were in the beginning, but I feel like by the time you get to mid-show they've kinda lost the plot.

Dean flipping out and destroying stuff is just so... typically Dean. Not really sure if there's a point I'm making but he does this a lot.

I want to be pissed at Castiel for validating Dean's extremely poor choices, but the guy's a total simp, and to be honest, I think if he reacted any other way Dean would instantly go to throat about all the dumb shit that Cas has done.

Crowley is so valid for pointing out he was the only one to warn Kevin that hanging out with the Winchesters was going to end with him dead. Sometimes it really does seem like he's the only one paying a lick of attention. Ironically, if he were slightly *less* ambitious, he'd be running the whole show.

Crowley, re: Sam: "The poor giant baby's in trouble again, isn't he?" Crowley is also the best because he recognizes that Sam is just a poor little meow meow who needs to be waddled and cuddled.

I haven't actually looked, but there should be more Crowley/Cas content. Crowley's right, Cas is a total flirt. Then again, Crowley's right about everything.

I think Gadreel didn't kill Dean not just because of Dean's plot armor (partial plot armor anyway; he can only die when Sam's around to be sad about it) but because I think he actually liked Dean as a person. Either way, malicious compliance for the win! That's how you show the bosses, Gadreel.

Random demon lady thinking Castiel is hot because he killed one of his kind and stole their grace is A+. Personally like to think all of Hell was sporting uncomfortable boners when he absorbed all the Leviathan and went on a mass killing spree. They're secretly very fond of him for that.

Again, haven't actually looked, but there should be a crap ton of Gadreel/Abner stuff. Hello, they were prison boyfriends!! Where's the AU where Gadreel ditches Metatron and shacks up with Abner instead? Bonus for a scene of Gadreel kissing Abner and Dean freaking out because that's my brother's body, you dick!

Gadreel has Sam trapped in a dream case about "ghouls and cheerleaders." Interesting that he picked a scenario that would appeal to Dean, not Sam in order to keep Sam calm and preoccupied.

Okay, I get why Dean walked off when Crowley's sticking needles in Sam's brain (even though I think he shouldn't have and it once again frames things around Dean feeling bad instead of Sam's actual suffering), and I get why Cas followed (simp), but guys?? You're just gonna leave Sam's body along with Crowley? Guys? Is this thing on?

So Cas blaming Gadreel for "breaking the universe" is pretty funny (very "for want of a nail" line of thinking there). Like, God and Lucifer don't factor in this at all, it's all this one rando's faulyt.

I'll probably talk about it again in more detail at some point, but the fact that there's never a moment where Sam and Gadreel bond over being manipulated by Lucifer is criminal.

Crowley: *indicates he should possess Sam to help kick out Gadreel* Dean: "No. Not happening." Crowley: "Don't be daft. Demons can take what they want. I can burrow into that rat's nest of a head. I can wake Sam up. Just call me plan 'C.'" Castiel: "You can't--" Dean: "You got a better idea?" I bring up this conversation because Dean flipped in approximately two seconds. Amazing the man doesn't get whiplash from how fast he changes his mind.

Crowley: "Besides, I don't want to be inside your brother any longer than I have to. I'm not one for sloppy seconds." This demon is a LIAR, judge! He specifically stays in Sam longer than he has to so he can be a cheerleader! And I'm sure that, as a demon, he has had plenty of sloppy seconds!

So do you think Sam and Dean changed their safe word from Poughkeepsie to something else because of this incident? If I were Sam I would have, just to be petty.

Sam immediately calling for Dean instead of going for a weapon when Crowley pops into his head is... interesting.

"I know how possession works, Sam. You've seen everything that he's seen, even if you can't remember." So I completely forgot about this line but the implications are quite horrifying. I think it's been inconsistent throughout the show, but my takeaway is that when people say that they don't remember anything post-possession, it's because they're either lying or they actively suppressing their own memories. So Sam actually remembers everything he did as Meg, Lucifer, and now Gadreel. Three additional sets of memories are in his head, all three of which involve murder. That's borked, yo.

Again, Crowley fighting to help Sam is adorable. He's no grade-A simp like Cas, but he is secretly fond of him and I love it. Dean, too.

Where are my VOTE CROWLEY t-shirts?

Kinda funny how Castiel, without either of the boys throwing out so much as a, "Can you give us a minute?" walks off to give them pseudo-privacy. He's such a good third wheel, knowing when he's not needed. <3

Dean's, "All right. Let me hear it," is honestly insufferable. He really thinks that he can get off with a stern talking to, and when that doesn't work, turns to self-flagellation instead. And when that doesn't work, he takes off dramatically to do something that will make himself feel better. At no point does he attempt to make a genuine apology or even suggest the idea amends. For all his "I'm poison" crap, he still doesn't think he did anything wrong. He sucks so bad for this, it's kind of amazing.

Hey, we get to begin the divorce era proper now! Nice.

[addictedtostorytelling]

i’ve been rewatching csi from the beginning (because i’ve never been able to make it past season 9 without grissom) and i’m finally up to the end of season 7… i have like 3 episodes left and i’m SAD. this team dynamic is so special to me and i feel this slow crawl of devastation that i’m (again) witnessing the end of what has been for 7 seasons. soon sara won’t be her usually cute and passionate self (in love too) that we get see in season 7, and she’ll leave, and then warrick is going to die, and grissom will leave… and nothing will ever be the same on this show. i don’t know how to get over it. how did you do it? how do i move on? how do i mourn this team dynamic that i’ve loved for so long and get used to new variations of the team? god, i wish grissom came back for a proper full ep earlier than the freaking series finale and the new show. i’m just… not sure how to enjoy without them all 😭

hi, anon!

yours is a very heartfelt question, and, unfortunately, i am probably the wrong person to answer it, because i never really "got over" the changes to the show post-s7, either.

not gonna lie to you: i have only watched the s10-s15 era of the show once through in its entirety.

the s8 and s9 angst i can deal with in order to get to the happy gsr ending in episode 09x10 "one to go." however, i hate all later seasons of the show beyond that point with all the salt that is in me, not only because of the cast turnover but also because the writing and production values of the show changed so much as to make the series (and the remaining characters) unrecognizable.

most of the time, i just straight-up ignore the fact that those seasons exist, preferring to imagine my own canon-divergent au version of the show (starting from the end of s7) instead.

i really do not engage with them unless someone sends me an ask.

that so, i can't exactly tell you how to learn to accept the new team or get comfortable in that altered narrative landscape. i never did, on either count.

instead, my advice is this: keep in mind you're not obligated to finish watching csi if doing so isn't enjoyable to you. you fell in love with a particular group of characters, story universe, and cast dynamic, and if those things went away or ship of theseus'd themselves into a production that is fundamentally different from the one you fell in love with in every way save name, you don't have to stick around anymore.

remember: you're watching this show as a hobby, not a job.

the #1 rule of fandom is to follow your bliss, so if you're not naturally motivated to finish the series—and especially if the thought of doing so is actively causing you dread—then you don't have to force the issue.

give yourself permission to say, "for me, the series ends with episode 08x01 'dead doll' or episode 09x10 'one to go' (or wherever you want to draw your line in the sand)" and then walk away.

if you need closure, write your own au version of what happens after that point or else find some fanfic author whose vision aligns with your own. keep living blissfully in your s1-s7 happy place with the original team graveyard, where grissom is the boss and sara stays in vegas and warrick doesn't die and they all keep solving cases together until retirement.

and then don't sweat it.

you're not being a "bad fan" or letting anyone down, and there's still plenty of material in the early seasons for you to engage with.

now.

if you absolutely feel you must finish the show (for whatever reason), i guess one thing i might suggest is to engage with work from fans who genuinely enjoy the later seasons. i know there are some folks in this fandom who adore the new characters and team graveyard version 2.0. they write meta and fic and make gifsets about it, and they have a total blast doing so. hanging around their blogs might help you to find things to appreciate.

another thing you might do is give yourself permission to "cherry-pick." watch just to see what happens. if there's stuff you like, go ahead and incorporate it into your conception of the show. the rest, discard. as i said above, you're not obligated to enjoy the show in a certain way and especially not "across the board." so if you like the fact sara has mother-in-law drama but hate the fact she gets divorced? then keep the first thing and toss out the second. if canon makes a stupid-ass decision, you can elect to ignore it.

and regardless of whether you ultimately decide to finish out your watch-through or not, don't forget: the beginning of the story—i.e., those seven golden seasons you so love—will always be there, and you can return to them as often as you want. the beauty of a story is that it exists in perpetuity. grissom, catherine, warrick, nick, sara, and greg will all still be there waiting for you, and you can continue to enjoy their dynamics however you best prefer them.

good luck, anon! if you choose to continue your watch, i hope you enjoy yourself. if not, then i hope you have fun mentally setting up shop in the early seasons.

i certainly do!

thanks for the question! please feel welcome to send another any time.

[self-loathing-angel-of-thursday2]

Beautiful Spouse’s Rewatch Thoughts SPN 09x10 Road Trip

“I was probably right to be skeptical that he’s not dead, but I think they’re trying to tell us that Kevin Tran is dead” “If you stand any closer, you’ll fkn burn yourself” “They just did that to light up his face and ear” “is the ear part of the face?” “crust” “What did Dean like about Kevin Tran so much?” Dean feels responsible

“I got that” Dean isn’t emoting healthily

“I think he realized that only after he destroyed $10K of lamps” “what the fuck? That was so weird” “maybe should have called security” “what’s the bottle next to the gun? Oh it’s table salt!” “It’s salt” “the pretty gun is purty expensive” “where was Cas at that time?” Cas was freshly human

“The lighting is fkn delicious” “well let’s start with torture and needles and other creepy shit” “or we can go to Crowley. That makes more sense” “I’m right up there with Crowley’s ask” “wouldn’t that imply that Plan B is better? I know he’s trying to convey his plan is better” “Way to show all your cards man” “inexplicably” “Does he not know he needs to put gas in it?” “oh it’s the pimp mobile” laughter

“He fkn said it” “I said the same thing”

“Did he think the gas goes in the butt like Dean’s car?” “Why are they both in the back?” “Oh yeah bud” “Hell yeah” “who did he kill?” He was the only who let the snake in the garden “I already forgot” “Is this how all cults get started? Jesus fkn Christ” “yes muffins” “bloody muffins” laughter

“Well shit” “This was Plan A, for real?” “When was Dr. Sexy?” Idk. Like S4

“Phallus on wheels?” 

Laughter “what” “that’s such a canned thing” “he’s fkn killing people” “gotta kill an asshole” “oh never mind” “what?” “Is he not a wise man? Is he one of the 3 dwarves?” NO, he’s not a wiseman who visited Jesus LMAO

“If this guy stabs his friend, all angels are shit.” “Except for Cas I guess” “I shouldn’t generalize, but a lot of them are shitty” “I hate those light switches. Those half-cocked sideways things’

“That’s a lot of jello powder” “with the fist thing” “why would you ever tell your boss that?” “Sorry ma’am. Just playing both sides” “some fkn party” “ghouls and cheerleaders? I want that episode” “That would have been a good episode. They realize they’re in the angel dream. That would have been a better way to write that. Would have been so badass” “Is this just brain damage that the angels can fix?” “just gotta lobotomize him no worries” laughter

“Small talk” “you split up and didn’t work together so….” “he made some ass joke” “you damn sonuvabitch” laughter

“Dean wouldn’t exist if it weren’t for Gadreel so idk” “can’t or won’t?” “not even king of hell would do this without getting paid first” laughter “what the hell man. He’s so good with the words. It’s crazy” “just a weird thing” “it is a bad joke.” “can’t he just say the word again?” “I need a go word” “We don’t have a go word” We can come up with one “Isn’t it Gadreel’s dream that he invented?” “gulp” “That’ll leave him all in one piece no problem” “oh yes the Lincoln” “Is’nt that brand dead now?” “the goodest guy” “he planned that out” “that was good though” laughter

“They don’t have him miked up very well so it sounds funny. That’s what I’m laughing about” “they must not believe in lawyers and health care directives” laughter

“How many sons of bitches are there?” “the fkn lighting man is so good” “so fkn good” “like in some shows, it doesn’t feel intentional but this one feels like a paintbrush”

[queermania]

#boooooo i had a long tag essay and was almost done and then i accidentally clicked on a notif and it disappeared :(#the short version is you're right!#dean did a shitty gross thing and i'm not going to defend it. it sucks!#i also think in a really shitty bass-ackwards way dean is trying to ask for help here#what you said about the weight being unbearable really stuck with me#if you look at just the gadreel decision alone that's huge#but he is also carrying the weight of holding sam charlie cas and kevin's lives in his hands and feeling like the only one who could help#cas and charlie came back but that doesn't erase the pain of watching them die and feeling like it was his fault.#plus the guilt he felt at bringing them back#if we go back to s8 he's carrying sam through the trials and before that he's carrying cas and benny out of purgatory#s7 it's the weight of losing cas and bobby plus trying to hold sam (and later honey cas) together#s6 it's lisa and ben plus sam's soul. s4-5 it's making sure heaven and hell don't kill sam.#is he partly to blame for placing this burden on himself? sure. is he handling things well? nope!#but it doesn't change the fact that he is carrying so much and he feels like he must carry it alone#(and sometimes others give him more to carry and/or tell him he must carry it alone)#dean does think he's responsible for everyone and to blame for everything. he does think he's poison.#most of the time he processes and deals with that alone which makes it so striking that he voices it in 09x10#and i think he takes the step to say it out loud because he is being crushed by his real and assumed responsibilities#and he just wants someone to help him#this may be unfair of him to ask for. it is certainly unfair to ask the way he does and at the time he does.#again i am not defending him this is a super shitty thing to do#I just think it's interesting to look at this as the straw that broke the camel's back so to speak#spn (via @monstermoviedean)

#prev tags#i think this is one of the worst side effects of the two of them rarely spending significant time with anyone else especially in seasons 8-9#dean IS asking for help here but he's asking for help from the person least equipped to help him in that moment#and possibly the person it's least fair to ask for this specific help in this instance#but who else can he ask?#he and cas are still sort of dancing around each other and he's carrying no small amount of guilt there already#and he doesn't really have any close friends at this point#they're still in the all our friends are dead era#i also think he's trying to force his relationship with sam to be recriprocal in a way it just never can be for so many reasons#who offered sam absolution (eventually) when he went off the rails with the demon blood and lilith?#who stood by him while lucifer had the wheel and gave him something to anchor himself to?#who pulled sam from the brink of suicide literally less than a dozen episodes ago by contradicting all sam's worst fears about himself#dean functions as sam's sin-eater over and over again throughout the show (this will not be the last time)#and he is looking for sam to do the same for him here#but sam cannot do that for dean for all the reasons dean must do it for sam#because their relationship is so entrenched in the parent-child dynamic#and that dynamic really doesn't move the other way so easily#i also think this is the culmination of several seasons' worth of dean's loved ones unintentionally making him last priority#in ways that specifically feed his worst self-image rather than contradict them#dean doesn't take the mark because sam said one cruel thing to him (or didn't say one thing he needed to hear)#dean took the mark because of that AND because cas didn't trust him with the angel tablet AND because benny didn't come back with sam#AND because cas let go of his hand in purgatory AND because sam didn't even try to get him out#AND because cas took in the souls and said they weren't family AND because cas wouldn't stop when dean begged him#AND because lisa and ben wanted him gone in the end AND because emma was born to kill him but died herself AND because#sam was out of the cage the whole year and nobody told him not even bobby AND because his mother's only living family loathed him#AND because cas went to crowley instead of him And and and and and and#seasons 6 through the first half of 9 were just a neverending avalanche of people literally choosing death over staying with him#and 9 tines out of 10 it wasn't even about him but look me in the eyes and tell me dean doesn't think it is#dean winchester#dean studies (via @darkshrimpemotions)

yeah you guys get it

perhaps my most controversial take as a deangirl is that dean is so wrong for what he says to sam at the end of 9x10. (what sam says isn't necessarily okay either but it is understandable in terms of how much time he's had to process the gadreel situation [read: like none] and the problem with what he says is more that it's part of a larger pattern of behavior but that's a discussion for a different time.) what dean does is... one of the grossest things he does in the entire series. he tries to guilt sam into forgiving him for something he's not even sorry for. and i think that's the real crux of the issue: dean's not sorry; and i don't think he should be but because he's not sorry, he doesn't know what to say, or how to move forward.

dean is very good at apologies. he's very good at saying, "here's what i did wrong. here's an acknowledgement of how it hurt you. here's the reason i did it. i know that doesn't make it okay. here's what i'm going to do going forward." but that's not an option in this situation. he's not sorry for what he did and he'd do it again in a heartbeat. so instead he says, "i'm so bad and evil and it makes me so sad" with an edge of "i'm saying this so you'll disagree with me and tell me how good i actually am and that you forgive me." but of course sam doesn't do that (and it's silly to think he would). so dean just leaves. and it leads directly to him taking the mark of cain.

and it's not that he's doing any of it on purpose. i don't think he even realizes he's doing it. part of what makes this situation so unique for him is the kevin of it all. dean's not sorry for saving sam's life but he is sorry that it got kevin killed and the weight of that is unbearable. there's nothing he can do to make it okay. but like, that doesn't make what he's doing here okay either.

all that being said, he's still my babygirl, and i support the angst scruff he's about to grow. <3

[mybrainproblems]

[idristardis]

SLSRS FOR NCIS: LOS ANGELES - “FORASTEIRA” - 09x10

Two of these in less than a week? Look at me go!!

While everyone else in the fandom was enjoying Superhuman (episode 10x02) on Sunday evening, I was taking another trip in the wayback machine to catch up on more of Season Nine. Slowly but surely I’m gaining on you all!!

I have to say, of the four episodes I’ve watched recently, I think this felt the most non-season-specific, and in a way, filler-ish. But I don’t mean that in a negative way - yes the case was a bit generic, and not really connected to the season’s overarching themes and recurring characters, but it was still well-plotted, fast-paced, and populated with interesting side characters (Ellie, bar owner of The Riven, for one). The episode even made room for a pretty funny/interesting side-plot with Deeks helping to find Guy’s stolen bag.

Things kicked off with an exciting cold open - the music chosen to underscore the fight as Pietra took out the three guys in the bar added a level of flair and energy to what was already a really well choreographed sequence. It was well staged/directed and the actors and stunt performers really pulled it off well.

I greatly enjoyed Eleanor (ahem, “Ellie”) and wished we could have seen more of her. She definitely had a lot of personality, and I agree with her about Tiny House Hunters - after I inevitably end up binge-watching six episodes I am always torn between loving the houses and wondering how anybody can realistically live all smooshed up like that for any length of time. I hear ya, Ellie.

It was great to see some switching up of the partner-pairings - with Deeks off helping Guy, it was Kensi’s turn to take Hidoko along for a field trip (last week, in Fool Me Twice, she was with Sam investigating the location where the Syndicate held Joellethane). It’s like Hidoko’s getting exposure a little bit at a time to how each member of the team functions - it’s letting her see how they work, both individually and in a unit, in a way that Moseley doesn’t really get to experience. I think/hope it’s helping Hidoko bond with and appreciate the team and see how what they have is special.

Annnnyway, I really enjoyed her working with Kensi - they fed off each other well, shooting ideas back and forth and really building on each other’s insights and trusting each other’s instincts. Great to see a pair of kickass ladies working together to get stuff done. 

Back with Callen and Sam, they’ve been forced into suits (which neither of them seem to like, but they both look sharp) and into playing Moseley’s bodyguards as she tries to get to the root of the case at the Brazilian Consulate with moderate success. Their scenes together throughout the episode were good, solid, and felt a bit more like the Sam and Callen of old - this episode we weren’t dwelling much on Sam’s recent losses or Callen’s romantic past. It was just about working the case, and the boys seemed to be back to their normal banter and snark - it was kinda heartwarming to hear, actually.

I particularly liked the bit about Callen picking up a girl at a bar “like The Riven” but in Georgia (as in the former Soviet Republic of...not the US State of...), and how when Sam asked whatever happened with her, Callen’s answer was “she tried to kill me” and Sam essentially kind of said “somehow, they always do” (or something along those lines). It made me laugh and made me realize that Sam seemed a bit more like himself this week, which is progress - on a very long road, but progress nonetheless.

In terms of the side plot, Deeks had his own thing going on this week - after pulling himself off of the main case to go and help Guy with his stolen property. There wasn’t too much focus on the specifics of getting back the bag - Deeks calls in a favor from someone else he knows at LAPD and manages to find it and get it released early from processing. Rather, the premise is an excuse for Deeks to spend time with his mother’s trainer/boyfriend.

Their interactions are mostly played for laughs - Guy meditates and remains unruffled while Deeks chatters and flutters around him, clearly uncomfortable with spending that much one on one time with someone who is romancing his Mom. There was a minor nugget of information Guy dropped regarding how much Roberta worries about what both Deeks and Kensi do for a living and how hard it must be to live such a dangerous lifestyle as their job requires. I’d think that it was another little bit of foreshadowing for what I’ve heard comes later in the season for Densi, but Deeks barely reacts to it - walking away complaining about $14 mango juice instead.

(Though, to be fair, that’s an atrocious price for mango juice).

The episode stinger provides a mixed emotional bag - some sweet tenderness with Deeks seeing Kensi’s injuries from her fight with Pietra (another fight which was awesomely choreographed, by the way - the fight choreo this whole episode was on point) and fussing over her, but also Kensi revealing that Guy’s sketchbook held an image of Roberta that was like “Rose in Titanic,” which made Deeks squirm and cringe. All in all, I wish they’d stayed in the tender moment a little longer, especially since Deeks and Kensi spent pretty much the whole episode apart, but I did think the sketchbook thing was funny and it made for a good button for the episode.

Side Note: I would have loved for there to be more space/time in the episode for Kensi and Pietra to have a real conversation (or at least one where Pietra isn’t aiming an RPG at someone). There was a tantalizing little tidbit Kensi mentioned when trying to talk Pietra down - it was about how she’d also lost her father as a teenager and “done some awful things.” Makes me wonder if that was during the time she lived on the street for a year that we heard about a few seasons ago and has never really been mentioned again. Hmm....

Overall, a really solid, well-done, exciting episode - probably my favorite of all the ones I’ve watched of late.

[halcyonfawn]

If “I love you” replaced every Doctor’s “I have duty of care”.

“Under The Lake”  (09x03)

Doctor: Or even better, another relationship. Come on, you lot, you're bananas about relationships. You're always writing songs about them, or going to war, or getting tattooed  

Clara: Doctor, I'm fine.

Doctor: I just felt that I, I, I had to say something.

Clara: I know. And I appreciated it.

Doctor: Because I love you.

Clara: Which you take very seriously, I know.

“The Girl Who Died”  (09x05)

Doctor: The human race, you're obsessed. You all need to get a hobby.

Clara: I've got a hobby, thanks. It's you, by the way.

Doctor: Well, get a new one.

Clara: Not this.

Doctor: Tomorrow it's going to be a bloodbath.

Clara: Don't even ask.

Doctor: These people all died hundreds of years before you were born

Clara: I'm not running.

Doctor: I love you. 

Clara: No, you don't, because I never asked for that.

Doctor: Every time we do something like this, I keep thinking, what if something happens to you?

“Face The Raven”  (09x10)

Clara: Die right. Die like I mean it. Face the Raven.

Doctor: No. This, this isn't happening. This can't be happening.

Clara: Maybe this is what I wanted. Maybe this is it. Maybe this is why I kept running. Maybe this is why I kept taking all those stupid risks. Kept pushing it.

Doctor: This is my fault.

Clara: This is my choice.

Doctor: I let you get reckless.

Clara: Why? Why shouldn't I be so reckless? You're reckless all the bloody time. Why can't I be like you?

Doctor: Clara, there's nothing special about me. I am nothing, but I'm less breakable than you. I love you. 

Clara: I never asked you to.

Doctor: You shouldn't have to ask.

“Hell Bent” (09x12)

Clara: Four and a half billion years?

Doctor: If she says so.

(Clara drops to her knees.)

Clara: No. Why would you even do that? I was dead! I was dead and gone. Why? Why would you even do that to yourself?

Doctor: I love you. 

[hollygl125]

Sara Sidle + Gil Grissom + “One to Go.” 💕💕💕

“But we have a big decision to make, right? Because we have to risk everything we’ve worked for in order to have her. I couldn’t do it.”

[hollygl125]

On January 15:

January 15 was the original air date for two hugely significant GSR moments, so I’m curious—in your mind, which is the more iconic?

Angst x 1000 🦋 (“Butterflied,” 04x12, original air date: January 15, 2004):

Rainforest reunion 🌴 (“One to Go,” 09x10, original air date: January 15, 2009):

[hollygl125]

Well, everything has changed And now it’s only you that matters I will find any way to your wild heart (*)

Part 1 | Part 2

[hollygl125]

shelikesvegitation:

[Sara storms in]

Sara Sidle [angrily] : You weren’t in your office.

Gil Grissom : And good morning to you too, Miss Sidle.

shelikesvegitation:

[Sara storms in]

Sara Sidle [angrily] : You weren’t in your office.

Gil Grissom : And good morning to you too, Miss Sidle.

shelikesvegitation:

[Sara storms in]

Sara Sidle [angrily] : You weren’t in your office.

Gil Grissom : And good morning to you too, Miss Sidle.

[hollygl125]

I am drawn I am drawn to her Like a moth to flame She leads me down Unbound (*)

[hollygl125]

[hollygl125]

On the end of CSI: Vegas:

*Please be warned: This is not in fact a post for fans of (the non-GSR portions of) CSI: Vegas. This is (shocking, I know!) a post for fans of Sara Sidle + Gil Grissom.*

I’d like to pour one out for CSI: Vegas. 🥂

I didn’t watch the series finale of CSI: Vegas, which aired this past Sunday, even though I’d told myself I might, just for the heck of it. I didn’t watch any of last season’s episodes with Greg Sanders, even though I’d told myself I would, though maybe someday I will if I get around to it.

I only watched the first ten episodes of CSI: Vegas—the GSR: The Epilogue episodes—but for those ten episodes I am awfully, terribly, tremendously grateful.

I mean, let’s be real, getting to see the two characters from a long-running TV will-they/won’t they couple come back and be so beautiful together is a one-in-a “I can’t remember seeing it before in my several decades of TV-watching” opportunity.

I’m going to start by quoting what I said on Twitter (for as long as I can stop my iPhone from updating the app it’s still a blue bird and I can use it) a few days after the CSI: Vegas cancellation was announced:

I’m so grateful to CSI: Vegas. By letting us see Sara + Grissom be as beautiful + perfect + magical as I’d have imagined them to be when finally allowed just to be (happy) together, it made the #GSR love story of the original CSI even more satisfying (to me, at least). 💕💕💕

I’m incredibly leery of revivals, which have the ability to wreak so much havoc. On this topic, I’d recommend checking out the story of the 2019 revival of Veronica Mars + the resulting death (murder) of that show’s fandom, if you’re not familiar with it.

Maybe it’s because I read an angstier (for GSR) earlier script for the CSIV pilot. But victories are all too rare, and I can’t call getting to see my two favourite science nerds be happy + gorgeous together anything but a win. Thanks always to JF + WP for being so magical. 💕💕💕

For those not familiar with the murder of the Veronica Mars fandom, I’m going to summarize it, because (in my mind, at least) it forms a kind of interesting parallel with CSI (specifically, the GSR of it all), despite being a three-season (and a movie and a fourth season) cult show, as opposed to the fifteen-season, most-watched scripted show of the millennium.

At the end of the second season (2/3 of the way through the original three seasons, which I’ll roughly line up with “Way to Go” (CSI, 09x10)), Ms. Mars and her beloved were happily reunited. But, by the time the show was cancelled a year later, TPTB had split the couple up. A movie was needed to reunite them and give everyone the happily-ever-after the show’s creator knew the fans craved. (I mean, does that not sound familiar? In the case of Veronica Mars, the movie was a Kickstarter-funded theatre release that came out in 2014, seven years after the show’s cancellation, but still; there’s a parallel to be made.)

Then roughly five years later an eight-episode revival was announced. Veronica Mars + Logan Echolls (“LoVe”) are one of my all-time favourite fictional couples. So was I excited? No, I was terrified. We’d left them happily together and in love. Why f*** with that? I tried to convince myself everything would be okay.

It wasn’t. The show’s creator sh*t on the fans in the worst way possible, and his justifications for it were positively insulting, just, you know, to women as a whole. (Luckily the season dropped earlier than scheduled on Hulu, and I was spoiled and spared the agony of actually watching it.)

So, as I noted on Twitter, I am incredibly leery of revivals. Sometimes we need the chance to give a proper ending to a beloved story (as in the case of the Veronica Mars and CSI (“Immortality”) movies). But sometimes a story needs an actual ending—it needs actually to end—so it has meaning and finality. And that is impossible when things keep getting revived.

My threshold then, for a revival, the bar by which I measure it, is simply that I need it not to f*** up what came before it. The Veronica Mars revival failed horribly (to put it mildly) in that respect. Whereas CSI: Vegas . . . well, to my mind, it made the GSR storyline of the original CSI even better and more satisfying, by letting us see how perfect and beautiful and happy and luminescent (and I could go on . . .) Sara and Grissom would be together if finally allowed to be just that.

I usually like to respond to what I would consider to be negative “bad takes” simply by making my own more positive point(s). But I am going to break that rule here for just a minute. On Twitter (yes, I know, my own fault!) sometimes I still see GSR fans complaining about CSI: Vegas: the “cut kiss” or GSR not getting enough screen time or GSR not seeming married enough (I think because they never got naked—I don’t know—I don’t really get that take myself—they were so divinely married!) or . . . again I don’t know. And it makes me kind of sad, and it drives me kind of ’round the bend. I really think that, if a GSR fan cannot appreciate the beauty WP and JF gave us in CSI: Vegas, they are snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. (I think they tend to be young, and I want to tell them: “Life is hard enough!!! Don’t set up roadblocks for yourself!”)

Aside from the GSR of it all, CSI: Vegas admittedly wasn’t really my cup of TV tea. Tonally it felt like it existed in a somewhat different universe; it reminded me more of Bones than of the OG CSI. Now, I watched all of Bones, more than once, so this isn’t meant to be an insult to Bones; it’s just not what I would be looking for from CSI.

But, the truth is, I wasn’t looking for more CSI. All I needed was for CSI: Vegas not to f*** things up for Sara and Grissom, and on that score it didn’t just meet but exceeded expectations.

I also love that CSI: Vegas put together such a diverse cast; they deserve an A+ for that. Although I didn’t watch either of them, I’m really unimpressed that CSI canned two women-led procedurals. (An obvious response here is that I should have been watching them, but I watch very, very little new TV these days and don’t live in the U.S., anyway, and honestly I just can’t with NCIS anymore.) Progress is achieved in fits and starts, I guess.

(I also will mention that literally hundreds of people work on these shows—Zuiker says 400 in his “Immortality” commentary. So, while it’s the nature of the industry, it’s always rough for those hundreds of people who had presumably-coveted network drama jobs suddenly to be in search of work, so I find it pretty insensitive to be revelling in the cancellation of a show, no matter how much you personally may not have liked it. That’s aside from the fact that, even if you didn’t like it, presumably some other people did.)

I guess that’s all I needed to say, for now.

Whoops, no, one more kind of important point for me: I watched CSI as it originally aired, and Sara + Grissom together were my favourite part of it, but I was not in any sense down the rabbit hole for them. I watched “Immortality,” I was incredibly grateful they were reunited, I wished they had kissed, and . . . I thought of them no more. For some reason OG CSI repeats have never been available where I live? So I thought of them no more—until CSI: Vegas started. We were in the midst of a pandemic, and I shelled out $100 to iTunes so I could rewatch CSI as love story. My CSI rewatch and CSI: Vegas reignited the spark, the disastrous path my mental health was on provided the lighter fuel, and I wound up down this rabbit hole with all of you. . . .

If you’re interested in that angstier earlier script for the CSI: Vegas pilot . . . well, I’ll save that for another day!

But, for now, won’t you join me in pouring one out for CSI: Vegas? 🥂

[magnificent-winged-beast]

♥️ Destiel Watching Thing SCHEDULE ♥️

Thank you so much to @risenlucifer @sketching-fox @cateyes315 @navajolovesdestiel @mercurialkitty @amethyst-shard @anjinhafeliko for voting, suggesting and let me choose the following Programming for tomorrow:

February Thursday 13th

18:15 EDT- Lazarus Rising ∞ 04x01

19:00 EDT - Free to be you and Me ∞ 05x03

19:45 EDT - The man who will be king ∞ 06x20

20:30 EDT - Goodbye Stranger ∞ 08x17

21:15 - 21:30 - Cockles Intermission

21:30 EDT - Heaven can’t wait ∞ 09x06

22:15 EDT - Road Trip ∞ 09x10

23:00  EDT - Tombstone ∞ 13X06

23:45 EDT - The Trap ∞ 15x09 

Please take in count the follow about this program:

The idea it’s to start at 18:00. According the confirmed assistance, if the majority wants to, we can start earlier.

The Cockles intermission it’s just a silly suggestion for the amount of episodes we will be watching. If the majority agrees, we can skip it and go straight (pun unintended) to the next episode to finish earlier.

The last episode was a lovely suggestion by Gio @sketching-fox made as a comment in this post, and I completely agree because has the loving and candid tone of the rest of the episodes we will watch earlier. As you can see, I avoid several episodes from season 10 to 12 because even if there are a few good scenes between Cas and Dean, the relationship gets kinda sour and/or one of them feels miserable and/or is taking abuse from the other (cough Dean).

I make the schedule as a guide for the ones who want to assist even if is just to see one or two specific episodes. Meaning, you are not obligated to be at the start of the Screening or the very end. The last episode is a suggestion to test THE HARD CORE CLOWN BASE. So if you want to watch just one episode and hold my hand for an episode, and you only got that time to give, I’ll be so grateful to see you briefly, even if it’s just for the Cockles Intermission.  

I’m tagging my beloved friends in tumblr, that showed interest in this Pre-Valentine’s gathering, even if they don’t ship Destiel. My eternal love for @bamcrux and @jenabean75

See you tomorrow ♥

Because some people ask me about this, here is a brief guide to use this new Site KAST:

Please go to this link first: https://w.kast.gg/ then follow the steps to create an account.

Once you have an account simply put this link: https://s.kast.gg/g/lbfyvnfh59 in a browser, either on your Phone or PC CHROME IS BETTER for both.

You don’t need to install the Software for PC. The software for Pc/Mac works for if you want to host the KAST. For example, host your own Watching Party, or show/teach something on your Computer. But if you want you can install it, and from there search the room with the name: THE FINAL COUNTDOWN.

@hi-its-teamfreewill @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @fangirlxwritesx67 @michyribeiro @naruhearts; @castiel-saved-me-from-myself; @flyingcatstiel; @destielette @babyinthetrench; @4evamc; @misccee; @destiel7337; @braezenkitty; @julesthequirky; @thatsnotwhoifuckingam; @gatstiel ; @bluefirecas @ain-t-bovvered;  @helianthus21; @emblue-sparks; @mcinspires @mmmexperimental; @dean-cas-in-the-impala; @agusvedder ; @mishezza  @cassielshalo  @princessofthefandomrealm; @webcricket; @cas-you-assbutt-dean-needs-you @mishandjen-tellmehow @trenchcoatsandfreckles @legendary-destiel @jessalrynn @lykanyouko @agus-likes @lugiadepression @maleansu @lizleeships @soleeryx @ptashka-naspivala @joey-ramone-is-my-spirit-animal @lyselkatz​ @crxstalcas @ryugarika @kittykatkatlyn16 @verobatto-angelxhunter @fingergunsbidean @rennerator @skycruise @dancingtuesdaymorning @instantlymellowwasteland @strawlessandbreles @tranquildes @destinyisalady @ivegivenupugh @bluestar86 @amwritingmeta @dw-sw @pray4jensen @the-faerie-circle @starsinursa @jemariel​ @mrsaquaman187 @ltleflrt @jupiterjames @zationao3 @iashstuff-blog​ @shixpe

♥️ Destiel Watching Thing ♥️

Hello my fellow Destiel shipers and Supernatural lovers.

I got this last minute idea about a Watching Party this Thursday of the most iconic Destiel episodes. My personal reasons for this proposal are:

This will be one of the few Valentine’s, in Canon, when Cas and Dean will be together. (My Head-Canon is: They recruit Sam to baby-sit Jack and still work in their issues)

There will be no episodes till March 16th.

It’s Valentine’s the following day and I’m alone with no plans or date.

This could be a good way to clown together for the last time… AKA the show is ending in 3 months. 😱

So, with the help of @zeeimpalaangel and @soleeryx we get to the following list of episodes that will be screening in our usual Kast room:

Lazarus Rising ∞ 04x01

Free to be you and Me ∞ 05x03

Heaven can’t wait ∞ 09x06

Tombstone ∞ 13X06

Now, I NEED YOUR HELP AND ADVICE to decide the rest of the episodes, 2 or 3 more to watch on that night. Although, if you get any other suggestions please reply in to this post.

The End ∞05x04

The third Man ∞ 06x03

The man who will be king ∞ 06x20

Goodbye Stranger ∞ 08x17

Road Trip ∞ 09x10

The screening will be on:

February Thursday 13th

I’ll be starting the screening at 18:00 EDT. When Lazarus Rising will be played to start the night that could last till 01:00 of the 14th, or according to the assembly of clowns assistance. (consult the daylight saving time change).

The Link is:

The Final Count Down 

To be able to enter the party go to: https://w.kast.gg/ and create a free account, is very easy to set, you only need your email.

As usual I’m tagging the people who I wish could be there with me. It’s also open to anyone that wants to join me in the Clowning. Yes, this time if you are alone and don’t have plans, you’ll be doing me a favor 😘💗

If any of the ones I tagged doesn’t Ship Destiel or is uncomfortable about being included. I’m sorry, please DM me to avoid confusion in the future.

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