#Accounting Firms Calgary

[wavetaxes]

"Wave Taxes Inc" is a leading accounting firm in Calgary, Canada, offering expert financial solutions. Their skilled team provides personalized tax planning, accounting, and financial advisory services for individuals and businesses. Trusted for their accuracy and dedication, they aim to optimize financial management and ensure compliance with Canadian tax regulations. Whether it's personal taxes or corporate accounting, clients rely on "Wave Taxes Inc" for reliable, efficient, and customized assistance. visit us: https://wavetaxes.ca

[nspccalgary]

Tax & Accounting Services Calgary

At NSPC, we help corporations, small and medium-sized firms, and all owner-managed businesses finish their basic accounting before offering support for streamlining the financial aspects of their operations. A competent small business accountant or designated CPA can help Calgary firms find hidden expenses that are preventing them from making a higher profit in addition to saving money on payroll services and taxes.

[mmtcpa]

In your 20s? Read our Simple Tips to Start Saving for Retirement

We get that thinking about retirement while you’re still in your twenties is daunting, but it’s essential to start early to give yourself the best chance for a comfortable future. Here are some tips to help you get started:

[social12340]

MMTCPA Best Accounting Firms Calgary

One of the top accounting firms Calgary, MMTCPA provides both corporations and individuals with a wide range of accounting services. The team is highly dedicated to provide top-notch services with highest possible standards. All the members of the team of MMTCPA is very skilled and talented in finance so much so that they can give clients all the help and direction in order to make wise financial decisions. All the consultation and guidance given will be beneficial for short term as well as long term needs. Everything works according to the clients needs as clients are always on the top priority.

[dknightconsulting]

Finding the best accounting firm for your company: the definitive guide

The best accounting firm could be the very one you have been looking for when it comes to balancing your business books and exceeding your set goals. If your business is small, the fact that you have chosen the right CPA can be a great help in handling your finances, tax compliance, and meeting business regulations. In this article, we will show how to go about choosing the best accounting services in Calgary.

Follow the steps below to choose the right accounting firm for your business:

1. Assess your business needs:

First, you need to know the objectives and goals of your business and then find an accounting firm to assist you. Given the size of your business — whether you emphasize one field or several, whether you are a financial institution — you need to decide what level of details you will take into account. Those businesses that do not take care of your desires will not have the chance of getting you closer to your goals.

2. Evaluate expertise and specialization:

The field is diverse in the different accounting firms and each of them is specialized in its area of practice. When selecting Calgary-based accounting services, it is advisable to go for companies with expertise in your business or sector. While most companies target a general customer segment, some focus on industrial sectors, for instance, the healthcare sector, the real estate sector, and the technology sector.

Before you sign the contract, you have to remember to check their reference, case study, and their experience with business similar to yours. Research the qualifications such as Certified Public Accountant (CPA) and Chartered Accountant (CA) to make sure that the company’s experts have the right level of experience.

3. Consider service offerings:

Beyond the duties of holding financial journals and filing taxes, accounting firms offer a lot of other services. Your enterprise might expand with services like financial planning, forensic accounting, payroll processing, and audits.

For a customized solution, the organization may take it a step further and provide you with what is ideal. The full-service accounting company will be ready whenever you need assistance in all the business operations that you are up to.

4. Assess technology and tools:

With technology’s aid the accounting processes can be drastically reduced to a great extent in the digital era. TO: Run your accounting business on the basis of various accounting software platforms and cloud solutions for finance management and reporting. In order to make you stick to good choices and keep the lead of the competitors, a tech-savvy company can provide real-time analytics, automated workflows and secure data management.

5. Evaluate communication and accessibility

The foundation of the most effective cooperation between the accounting firms would be the efficient communication. To ensure that the service is provided immediately when the participants need it, consider the organization’s communication strategies, responsiveness, and accessibility.

Consider attributes such as how promptly they are responding to your queries, how often they agree to interact with you or to evaluate your progress, and if they are having a dedicated account manager. Communication with your financial team in a transparent and direct manner will help you to unite goals and foster trust and collaboration.

6. Review reputation and reliability:

Accounting firm’s credibility and reliability are largely reflected in its reputation. Do the necessary by verifying a company’s qualifications through the relevant regulatory agencies, reading online reviews, and seeking advice from colleagues or trade groups.

Think about the firm’s long-term presence on the market, how loyal clients are, and how many complaints and punishments it has faced as the factors of reliability. Expert service and outcomes are more likely to be a result from an experienced accounting firm that is famed for its integrity and professionalism.

7. Consider cost and value:

It is also important to look at the accounting firm’s value proposition beyond the price. Cheaper price doesn’t always mean better quality, so don’t make this your only consideration.

The real worth of the firm’s services could be assessed by accumulating all the possible savings, tax efficiencies, and strategic financial guidance that you could benefit from. It is a good idea to obtain full quotations or proposals from different companies so that you can compare their service offerings, rates, and additional charges.

8. Seek personalized attention:

As your firm matures, its accounting may change due to its distinctiveness. Choose an accountancy firm that wants to learn about your business’s interests, difficulties, and goals. An active corporation can do more than accountancy.

By understanding consumers’ needs and providing customized solutions, the consultant may exceed expectations. Personalized attention includes account managers, frequent performance evaluations, and active development suggestions.

9. Conduct interviews and due diligence:

After narrowing down the options, schedule interviews or meetings with the selected accounting firms to continue examining match and fit. Make a list of questions based on the candidate’s background, customer service style, industry experience, and corporate plans. Check the firm’s ethics, culture, and client benefit now. Research references, credentials, and service or participation agreements before making a decision.

10. Establish a long-term partnership:

Selecting the appropriate accounting firm is more than just choosing a service; it’s about building a long-term collaboration built on trust, cooperation, and mutual understanding. After finding a company that matches your needs, keep communication open and nurture the connection.

Review the company’s performance often, give feedback, and inform everyone of any changes or issues that may affect your business. Strong accounting firm relationships may help your organization achieve sustainability, stability, and prosperity faster.

Conclusion:

The accounting firm’s knowledge, services, communication, reputation, and value may influence this strategic option. A trusted partner who shares your financial goals requires a study of the company’s demands, rigorous research, and applicant evaluation. Remember that your accounting firm connection goes beyond transactions. This collaboration advances your firm via innovation, development, and success.

For long-term financial health and expansion, it’s critical to work with a reputable Calgary accounting firm. Streamline financial processes, enhance tax strategies, and effectively handle regulatory regulations with the help of professional accounting businesses

Source : creativereleased

[saraccounting]

Please be aware that neither an audit nor a review has been performed on these business financial statements. As the best Accountants in Calgary, we prepare corporate financial statements for clients and present data that are a representation of management and express no opinion or guarantee on the accounts.

[matrixaccountingcalgary]

Professional Tax Accountants Calgary Professional tax accountants play a crucial role in assisting individuals and businesses with tax compliance, planning, and optimizing their financial positions. Their expertise in tax laws and regulations ensures accurate and efficient tax management, providing clients with peace of mind and potential tax savings.

Professional tax accountants are trained and qualified professionals who specialize in providing tax-related services to individuals, businesses, organizations, and other entities. These accountants have expertise in tax laws, regulations, and tax planning, enabling them to assist clients in various tax-related matters.

Matrix Accounting is one of the best accounting firm in Calgary, with the team of highly professional accountants to deal with all tax matters at personal and corporate levels.

Book a free consultation with experts today at 403-668-4070.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Twinkfrump Linkdump

I'm touring my new, nationally bestselling novel The Bezzle! Catch me in CHICAGO (Apr 17), Torino (Apr 21) Marin County (Apr 27), Winnipeg (May 2), Calgary (May 3), Vancouver (May 4), and beyond!

Welcome to the seventeenth Pluralistic linkdump, a collection of all the miscellany that didn't make it into the week's newsletter, cunningly wrought together in a single edition that ranges from the first ISP to AI nonsense to labor organizing victories to the obituary of a brilliant scientist you should know a lot more about! Here's the other 16 dumps:

https://pluralistic.net/tag/linkdump/

If you're reading this (and you are!), it was delivered to you by an internet service provider. Today, the ISP industry is calcified, controlled by a handful of telcos and cable companies. But the idea of an "ISP" didn't come out of a giant telecommunications firm – it was created, in living memory, by excellent nerds who are still around.

Depending on how you reckon, The Little Garden was either the first or the second ISP in America. It was named after a Palo Alto Chinese restaurant frequented by its founders. To get a sense of that founding, read these excellent recollections by Tom Jennings, whose contributions include the seminal zine Homocore, the seminal networking protocol Fidonet, and the seminal third-party PC ROM, whence came Dell, Gateway, Compaq, and every other "PC clone" company.

The first installment describes how an informal co-op to network a few friends turned into a business almost by accident, with thousands of dollars flowing in and out of Jennings' bank account:

https://www.sensitiveresearch.com/Archive/TLG/TLG.html

And it describes how that ISP set a standard for neutrality, boldly declaring that "TLGnet exercises no control whatsoever over the content of the information." They introduced an idea of radical transparency, documenting their router configurations and other technical details and making them available to the public. They hired unskilled punk and queer kids from their communities and trained them to operate the network equipment they'd invented, customized or improvised.

In part two, Jennings talks about the evolution of TLG's radical business-plan: to offer unrestricted service, encouraging their customers to resell that service to people in their communities, having no lock-in, unbundling extra services including installation charges – the whole anti-enshittification enchilada:

https://www.sensitiveresearch.com/Archive/TLG/

I love Jennings and his work. I even gave him a little cameo in Picks and Shovels, the third Martin Hench novel, which will be out next winter. He's as lyrical a writer about technology as you could ask for, and he's also a brilliant engineer and thinker.

The Little Garden's founders and early power-users have all fleshed out Jennings' account of the birth of ISPs. Writing on his blog, David "DSHR" Rosenthal rounds up other histories from the likes of EFF co-founder John Gilmore and Tim Pozar:

https://blog.dshr.org/2024/04/the-little-garden.html

Rosenthal describes some of the more exotic shenanigans TLG got up to in order to do end-runs around the Bell system's onerous policies, hacking in the purest sense of the word, for example, by daisy-chaining together modems in regions with free local calling and then making "permanent local calls," with the modems staying online 24/7.

Enshittification came to the ISP business early and hit it hard. The cartel that controls your access to the internet today is a billion light-years away from the principled technologists who invented the industry with an ethos of care, access and fairness. Today's ISPs are bitterly opposed to Net Neutrality, the straightforward proposition that if you request some data, your ISP should send it to you as quickly and reliably as it can.

Instead, ISPs want to offer "slow-lanes" where they will relegate the whole internet, except for those companies that bribe the ISP to be delivered at normal speed. ISPs have a laughably transparent way of describing this: they say that they're allowing services to pay for "fast lanes" with priority access. This is the same as the giant grocery store that charges you extra unless you surrender your privacy with a "loyalty card" – and then says that they're offering a "discount" for loyal customers, rather than charging a premium to customers who don't want to be spied on.

The American business lobby loves this arrangement, and hates Net Neutrality. Having monopolized every sector of our economy, they are extremely fond of "winner take all" dynamics, and that's what a non-neutral ISP delivers: the biggest services with the deepest pockets get the most reliable delivery, which means that smaller services don't just have to be better than the big guys, they also have to be able to outbid them for "priority carriage."

If everything you get from your ISP is slow and janky, except for the dominant services, then the dominant services can skimp on quality and pocket the difference. That's the goal of every monopolist – not just to be too big to fail, but also too big to care.

Under the Trump administration, FCC chair Ajit Pai dismantled the Net Neutrality rule, colluding with American big business to rig the process. They accepted millions of obviously fake anti-Net Neutrality comments (one million identical comments from @pornhub.com addresses, comments from dead people, comments from sitting US Senators who support Net Neutrality) and declared open season on American internet users:

https://ag.ny.gov/press-release/2021/attorney-general-james-issues-report-detailing-millions-fake-comments-revealing

Now, Biden's FCC is set to reinstate Net Neutrality – but with a "compromise" that will make mobile internet (which nearly all of use sometimes, and the poorest of us are reliant on) a swamp of anticompetitive practices:

https://cyberlaw.stanford.edu/blog/2024/04/harmful-5g-fast-lanes-are-coming-fcc-needs-stop-them

Under the proposed rule, mobile carriers will be able to put traffic to and from apps in the slow lane, and then extort bribes from preferred apps for normal speed and delivery. They'll rely on parts of the 5G standard to pull off this trick.

The ISP cartel and the FCC insist that this is fine because web traffic won't be degraded, but of course, every service is hellbent on pushing you into using apps instead of the web. That's because the web is an open platform, which means you can install ad- and privacy-blockers. More than half of web users have installed a blocker, making it the largest boycott in human history:

https://doc.searls.com/2023/11/11/how-is-the-worlds-biggest-boycott-doing/

But reverse-engineering and modding an app is a legal minefield. Just removing the encryption from an app can trigger criminal penalties under Section 1201 of the DMCA, carrying a five-year prison sentence and a $500k fine. An app is just a web-page skinned in enough IP that it's a felony to mod it.

Apps are enshittification's vanguard, and the fact that the FCC has found a way to make them even worse is perversely impressive. They're voting on this on April 25, and they have until April 24 to fix this. They should. They really should:

https://docs.fcc.gov/public/attachments/DOC-401676A1.pdf

In a just world, cheating ripoff ISPs would the top tech policy story. The operational practices of ISPs effect every single one us. We literally can't talk about tech policy without ISPs in the middle. But Net Neutrality is an also-ran in tech policy discourse, while AI – ugh ugh ugh – is the thing none of us can shut up about.

This, despite the fact that the most consequential AI applications sum up to serving as a kind of moral crumple-zone for shitty business practices. The point of AI isn't to replace customer service and other low-paid workers who have taken to demanding higher wages and better conditions – it's to fire those workers and replace them with chatbots that can't do their jobs. An AI salesdroid can't sell your boss a bot that can replace you, but they don't need to. They only have to convince your boss that the bot can do your job, even if it can't.

SF writer Karl Schroeder is one of the rare sf practitioners who grapples seriously with the future, a "strategic foresight" guy who somehow skirts the bullshit that is the field's hallmark:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/03/07/the-gernsback-continuum/#wheres-my-jetpack

Writing on his blog, Schroeder describes the AI debates roiling the Association of Professional Futurists, and how it's sucking him into being an unwilling participant in the AI hype cycle:

https://kschroeder.substack.com/p/dragged-into-the-ai-hype-cycle

Schroeder's piece is a thoughtful meditation on the relationship of SF's thought-experiments and parables about AI to the promises of AI hucksters, who promise that a) "general artificial intelligence" is just around the corner and that b) it will be worth trillions of dollars.

Schroeder – like other sf writers including Ted Chiang and Charlie Stross (and me) – comes to the conclusion that AI panic isn't about AI, it's about power. The artificial life-form devouring the planet and murdering our species is the limited liability corporation, and its substrate isn't silicon, it's us, human bodies:

What’s lying underneath all our anxieties about AGI is an anxiety that has nothing to do with Artificial Intelligence. Instead, it’s a manifestation of our growing awareness that our world is being stolen from under us. Last year’s estimate put the amount of wealth currently being transferred from the people who made it to an idle billionaire class at $5.2 trillion. Artificial General Intelligence whose environment is the server farms and sweatshops of this class is frightening only because of its capacity to accelerate this greatest of all heists.

After all, the business-case for AI is so very thin that the industry can only survive on a torrent of hype and nonsense – like claims that Amazon's "Grab and Go" stores used "AI" to monitor shoppers and automatically bill them for their purchases. In reality, the stores used thousands of low-paid Indian workers to monitor cameras and manually charge your card. This happens so often that Indian technologists joke that "AI" stands for "absent Indians":

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/29/pay-no-attention/#to-the-little-man-behind-the-curtain

Isn't it funny how all the really promising AI applications are in domains that most of us aren't qualified to assess? Like the claim that Google's AI was producing millions of novel materials that will shortly revolutionize all forms of production, from construction to electronics to medical implants:

https://deepmind.google/discover/blog/millions-of-new-materials-discovered-with-deep-learning/

That's what Google's press-release claimed, anyway. But when two groups of experts actually pulled a representative sample of these "new materials" from the Deep Mind database, they found that none of these materials qualified as "credible, useful and novel":

https://pubs.acs.org/doi/10.1021/acs.chemmater.4c00643

Writing about the researchers' findings for 404 Media, Jason Koebler cites Berkeley researchers who concluded that "no new materials have been discovered":

https://www.404media.co/google-says-it-discovered-millions-of-new-materials-with-ai-human-researchers/

The researchers say that AI data-mining for new materials is promising, but falls well short of Google's claim to be so transformative that it constitutes the "equivalent to nearly 800 years’ worth of knowledge" and "an order-of-magnitude expansion in stable materials known to humanity."

AI hype keeps the bubble inflating, and for so long as it keeps blowing up, all those investors who've sunk their money into AI can tell themselves that they're rich. This is the essence of "a bezzle": "The magic interval when a confidence trickster knows he has the money he has appropriated but the victim does not yet understand that he has lost it":

https://pluralistic.net/2023/03/09/autocomplete-worshippers/#the-real-ai-was-the-corporations-that-we-fought-along-the-way

Among the best debezzlers of AI are the Princeton Center for Information Technology Policy's Arvind Narayanan and Sayash Kapoor, who edit the "AI Snake Oil" blog. Now, they've sold a book with the same title:

https://www.aisnakeoil.com/p/ai-snake-oil-is-now-available-to

Obviously, books move a lot more slowly than blogs, and so Narayanan and Kapoor say their book will focus on the timeless elements of identifying and understanding AI snake oil:

In the book, we explain the crucial differences between types of AI, why people, companies, and governments are falling for AI snake oil, why AI can’t fix social media, and why we should be far more worried about what people will do with AI than about anything AI will do on its own. While generative AI is what drives press, predictive AI used in criminal justice, finance, healthcare, and other domains remains far more consequential in people’s lives. We discuss in depth how predictive AI can go wrong. We also warn of the dangers of a world where AI continues to be controlled by largely unaccountable big tech companies.

The book's out in September and it's up for pre-order now:

https://bookshop.org/p/books/ai-snake-oil-what-artificial-intelligence-can-do-what-it-can-t-and-how-to-tell-the-difference-arvind-narayanan/21324674

One of the weirder and worst side-effects of the AI hype bubble is that it has revived the belief that it's somehow possible for giant platforms to monitor all their users' speech and remove "harmful" speech. We've tried this for years, and when humans do it, it always ends with disfavored groups being censored, while dedicated trolls, harassers and monsters evade punishment:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/08/07/como-is-infosec/

AI hype has led policy-makers to believe that we can deputize online services to spy on all their customers and block the bad ones without falling into this trap. Canada is on the verge of adopting Bill C-63, a "harmful content" regulation modeled on examples from the UK and Australia.

Writing on his blog, Canadian lawyer/activist/journalist Dimitri Lascaris describes the dire speech implications for C-63:

https://dimitrilascaris.org/2024/04/08/trudeaus-online-harms-bill-threatens-free-speech/

It's an excellent legal breakdown of the bill's provisions, but also a excellent analysis of how those provisions are likely to play out in the lives of Canadians, especially those advocating against genocide and taking other positions the that oppose the agenda of the government of the day.

Even if you like the Trudeau government and its policies, these powers will accrue to every Canadian government, including the presumptive (and inevitably, totally unhinged) near-future Conservative majority government of Pierre Poilievre.

It's been ten years since Martin Gilens and Benjamin I Page published their paper that concluded that governments make policies that are popular among elites, no matter how unpopular they are among the public:

https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/perspectives-on-politics/article/testing-theories-of-american-politics-elites-interest-groups-and-average-citizens/62327F513959D0A304D4893B382B992B

Now, this is obviously depressing, but when you see it in action, it's kind of wild. The Biden administration has declared war on junk fees, from "resort fees" charged by hotels to the dozens of line-items added to your plane ticket, rental car, or even your rent check. In response, Republican politicians are climbing to their rear haunches and, using their actual human mouths, defending junk fees:

https://prospect.org/politics/2024-04-12-republicans-objectively-pro-junk-fee/

Congressional Republicans are hell-bent on destroying the Consumer Finance Protection Bureau's $8 cap on credit-card late-fees. Trump's presumptive running-mate Tim Scott is making this a campaign plank: "Vote for me and I will protect your credit-card company's right to screw you on fees!" He boasts about the lobbyists who asked him to take this position: champions of the public interest from the Consumer Bankers Association to the US Chamber of Commerce.

Banks stand to lose $10b/year from this rule (which means Americans stand to gain $10b/year from this rule). What's more, Scott's attempt to kill the rule is doomed to fail – there's just no procedural way it will fly. As David Dayen writes, "Not only does this vote put Republicans on the spot over junk fees, it’s a doomed vote, completely initiated by their own possible VP nominee."

This is an hilarious own-goal, one that only brings attention to a largely ignored – but extremely good – aspect of the Biden administration. As Adam Green of Bold Progressives told Dayen, "What’s been missing is opponents smoking themselves out and raising the volume of this fight so the public knows who is on their side."

The CFPB is a major bright spot in the Biden administration's record. They're doing all kind of innovative things, like making it easy for you to figure out which bank will give you the best deal and then letting you transfer your account and all its associated data, records and payments with a single click:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/10/21/let-my-dollars-go/#personal-financial-data-rights

And now, CFPB chair Rohit Chopra has given a speech laying out the agency's plan to outlaw data-brokers:

https://www.consumerfinance.gov/about-us/newsroom/prepared-remarks-of-cfpb-director-rohit-chopra-at-the-white-house-on-data-protection-and-national-security/

Yes, this is some good news! There is, in fact, good news in the world, bright spots amidst all the misery and terror. One of those bright spots? Labor.

Unions are back, baby. Not only do the vast majority of Americans favor unions, not only are new shops being unionized at rates not seen in generations, but also the largest unions are undergoing revolutions, with control being wrestled away from corrupt union bosses and given to the rank-and-file.

Many of us have heard about the high-profile victories to take back the UAW and Teamsters, but I hadn't heard about the internal struggles at the United Food and Commercial Workers, not until I read Hamilton Nolan's gripping account for In These Times:

https://inthesetimes.com/article/revolt-aisle-5-ufcw-grocery-workers-union

Nolan profiles Faye Guenther, president of UFCW Local 3000 and her successful and effective fight to bring a militant spirit back to the union, which represents a million grocery workers. Nolan describes the fight as "every bit as dramatic as any episode of Game of Thrones," and he's not wrong. This is an inspiring tale of working people taking power away from scumbag monopoly bosses and sellout fatcat leaders – and, in so doing, creating a institution that gets better wages, better working conditions, and a better economy, by helping to block giant grocery mergers like Kroger/Albertsons.

I like to end these linkdumps on an up note, so it feels weird to be closing out with an obituary, but I'd argue that any celebration of the long life and many accomplishments of my friend and mentor Anne Innis Dagg is an "up note."

I last wrote about Anne in 2020, on the release of a documentary about her work, "The Woman Who Loved Giraffes":

https://pluralistic.net/2020/02/19/pluralist-19-feb-2020/#annedagg

As you might have guessed from the title of that doc, Anne was a biologist. She was the first woman scientist to do field-work on giraffes, and that work was so brilliant and fascinating that it kicked off the modern field of giraffology, which remains a woman-dominated specialty thanks to her tireless mentoring and support for the scientists that followed her.

Anne was also the world's most fearsome slayer of junk-science "evolutionary psychology," in which "scientists" invent unfalsifiable just-so stories that prove that some odious human characteristic is actually "natural" because it can be found somewhere in the animal kingdom (i.e., "Darling, please, it's not my fault that I'm fucking my grad students, it's the bonobos!").

Anne wrote a classic – and sadly out of print – book about this that I absolutely adore, not least for having one of the best titles I've ever encountered: "Love of Shopping" Is Not a Gene:

https://memex.craphound.com/2009/11/04/love-of-shopping-is-not-a-gene-exposing-junk-science-and-ideology-in-darwinian-psychology/

Anne was my advisor at the University of Waterloo, an institution that denied her tenure for fifty years, despite a brilliant academic career that rivaled that of her storied father, Harold Innis ("the thinking person's Marshall McLuhan"). The fact that Waterloo never recognized Anne is doubly shameful when you consider that she was awarded the Order of Canada:

https://nationalpost.com/news/canada/queen-of-giraffes-among-new-order-of-canada-recipients-with-global-influence

Anne lived a brilliant live, struggling through adversity, never compromising on her principles, inspiring a vast number of students and colleagues. She lived to ninety one, and died earlier this month. Her ashes will be spread "on the breeding grounds of her beloved giraffes" in South Africa this summer:

https://obituaries.therecord.com/obituary/anne-innis-dagg-1089534658

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/13/goulash/#material-misstatement

Image: Valeva1010 https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Hungarian_Goulash_Recipe.png

CC BY-SA 4.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/deed.en

[nhl-stories]

Did You Come? – Matthew Tkachuk

Summary: Deciding to pick up and move your life doesn't make you stupid, right?

Author’s Note: Angst, infidelity, and adult content below, enter at your own risk.

Word Count: 2.6k​

Album Series Masterlist

Was she good? Just what you liked? Did you come? How many times?

I used to be smart, I swear.

I was logical and calculating. I made pro and con lists, had five and ten-year plans. I thought things out. Some called me rigid; I called it goal-oriented and it had been working out for me.

Then I met Matthew and I became an idiot.

The worst part is I loved every moment of it.

I loved the spontaneity, how I had to loosen up and go with the flow of his far more unpredictable schedule. I loved the tweaks I made in my ten-year plan to fit around him.

I spent years swearing I would never be the type of woman who would change for a man and yet here I was about to tell a man I was willing to pick up my entire life and move 4,000 km for him and his dreams.

I really was smart once, I swear.

But now I’m in front of a foreign house with a pros and cons list that just has one pro: because you love him. And that pro outweighed everything else.

I finally build up the courage to ring the doorbell, happy it doesn't have a camera. I wait for a minute before trying again. I look at my phone, wondering if the time change has turned me around and he’s not at home. That there’s a game or practice I didn’t account for.

But before I can berate myself for not quadruple checking my plans, a shirtless Matthew opens the door.

The daily sun exposure has been good to him, his golden skin makes me want to cry. I didn’t realize how much my body had ached to be near him and I throw myself into his arms before he even has time to react.

I squeeze him so tightly, like I can’t believe he’s real or that if I let go, he’ll disappear like a mirage. I squeeze tighter to keep my mind off sobbing.

“Babe, you’re suffocating me,” he finally chokes out and I let go, embarrassed.

I pull back and smile, the speech I had rehearsed already forgotten as my brain turns to goo around him.

“What are you doing here?” He runs a hand through his hair, which is messier than usual even with his curls kept short.

“I wanted to surprise you,” I swallow before I can admit the rest, trying to gauge his stoic expression.

“I– I want to move down here,” I put on a brave face, I want to show how sure I am about this.

“Seriously?” a smirk turns into a grin.

I can’t speak, my voice is certain to crack, so I nod instead.

“You’re gonna love it down here, it’s so different from Calgary but it’s great. And I’ll help you figure out how you can take the bar down here and we’ll find you a new firm and–“

I cut him off with a kiss. It’s the first we’ve shared since we packed up the last of his boxes in Calgary and you could tell in how quickly it becomes heated.

My tongue explores his mouth as if I’d find something new after all these months and he’s pulling me closer and closer as if he could merge our bodies by force.

I have to pull away because I feel woozy but I can’t bear the separation for too long. I move my lips along his jaw towards his ear.

“I missed you so much.”

I bite his ear lobe and hear him growl, primal and low, in response. He picks me up in a flash and before I can even register the layout of his place, I’m on my back in his bed.

“I can’t believe you’re really here,” he has a wolfish smile as he hovers above me, but there’s sincerity dripping from his tone.

He kisses me firmly and I feel my bones melting as he moves down my body.

“I never thought you’d come,” he whispers against my collar bone and I’m the one who moves to get my shirt off.

“Eager, are we?” He laughs at my hands already working their way down to my pants.

I can’t even think of a good response.

Because I’m an idiot now.

So instead, I just nod. Desperate for his touch, his attention, his praise. He’s suddenly my sun and my world revolves around him.

“I think I can do something about that.”

He moves my hands and pins them over my head with one hand and pushes his other under my waistband. He kisses me gently as his fingers brush against my soaked underwear and I can feel his cocky smirk against my lips. I can feel my blood leaving my brain.

“It’s been a while, huh?” he takes his sweet time dipping his fingers in, “no one knows how to touch you like this.”

I can only let out a whimper in response. He’s right, my vibrator can only do so much.

“Let me show you how happy I am that you’re here.”

He moves between my aching legs and suddenly I’m exposed as I can feel his hot breath and it takes all my will power to not just shoves his face in there.

“Matty please,” I hate how desperate I sound.

Usually, he likes to tease things out, make me fall apart until I’m begging. But it’s been months and I’m making that pretty obvious so he gives in pretty quickly. I almost let out a sigh of relief when his lips wrap around my clit.

I thread my hands in his curls and try to focus on the individual sensations to make this last, but I’m overstimulated. I squeeze my thighs against his head and find myself orgasming far too quickly.

“Fuck, that was hot,” Matt rests his head on my thigh and looks up at me, pupils blown out.

“Yeah, sorry.”

“No need to be sorry,” he kisses my thigh, “cause there’s more where that came from, once I catch my breath.”

I have just enough time to run a hand lovingly through his hair and slow my heartrate to an acceptable level before he begins his second assault.

I can keep my thoughts straight this time around, at least for the time being. I can focus on the feeling of his tongue and the pressure of his suction and how his fingers curl just so inside of me.

I throw my head back and notice a hair tie sitting on the bedside table, the side that would be mine. In the moment my brain is flashing red flags, but another part of me thinks that Taryn was probably here at some point, and another part of my brain feels Matt nip at my clit and curl his fingers in the perfect way.

That last part wins out and all I can do is ride out the waves of pleasure and roll my eyes into the back of my head.

Have I mentioned I’m an idiot?

We wake up several hours and orgasms later, Matthew’s head on my chest. He says he missed falling asleep to the sound of my heartbeat.

I carefully slip out from under him and take stock of his new place. I start in the kitchen since I haven’t eaten since I got here. His fridge is mostly bare except for some sports drinks and coconut water and beer.

Thankfully, Matthew has a bit of a sweet tooth and there’s ice cream in the freezer. Not the most nutritious refuel, but I’m too euphoric to really think about it.

I survey the place now; it clearly has had a woman’s touch. I suspect Chantal had a big hand in that like she had in Matthew’s old place.  But it’s still a little too put together, without any intervention he’s been known to get a bit messy. I remember insisting on spending time in my much tidier home early on in the relationship.

I peek out his curtains to see the backyard, there are a couple of plants by the pool I know he couldn’t keep alive on his own.

“Going out there naked?” I jump at Matthew’s voice.

“As fun as sunburning my vag sounds,” I laugh and feed him a spoonful ice cream.

He wraps his arms around me and I feel like this could be home.

We spend the rest of the day lazily wrapped in each other. The heat has died down but it’s not any less intimate. Any excuse to be close and touch we take. My heart aches thinking about all the time we spent apart because I had to think it through and not just dive in headfirst.

Things already feel pretty normal when I’m getting ready to go to a game the next day. Going through the motions feels so familiar though I need far fewer layers, which makes me feel a bit naked as I take an Uber to the rink.

I eventually find my way to the family suite and am greeted by a familiar scene and a familiar face.

“Oh my god, I didn’t know you were coming to town!”

I’m wrapped into the tight embrace of Sam Bennett’s girlfriend, Maeve, our time together only briefly overlapped but we had instantly bonded over being born and raised Alberta babes. Another piece of home.

“I kind of surprised Matthew.”

“I’m sure it was a hell of a surprise, how long are you here?”

“Forever?”

Her smile falters for a second, “No shit. I guess I never thought getting you out of Calgary was an option.”

“I didn’t really either,” I shrug as a knot begins to tighten in my stomach.

“I’m really happy you’re here though,” she squeezes my hand before pulling me towards some of the other women, who have not-so-discreetly been trying to figure out how I fit in.

“Guys, this is Matthew’s –– girlfriend,” Maeve’s pause between her last two words makes me uncomfortable.

“Oh?” One woman speaks up before a list of names is rattled off and I can’t get out of my head enough to remember any of them.

There’s a tension in the suite and I can tell it’s not about the game, although that’s fairly close. I try and ignore it by keeping the focus off me, just making small talk and catching up with Maeve.

Halfway through the second period another woman walks into the suite. She’s tall, tan, and maybe a bit overdressed for a hockey game, even by some WAG standards. She silently acknowledges the group before taking a seat.

Then I feel everyone’s eyes on me and I feel desperately out of the loop. I look over to Maeve with a blank stare, hoping for some clarification.

“That fucking bastard,” she says under her breath but loud enough for me to understand exactly what’s going on now.

Like I said, I’m a fucking idiot.

“Let’s go get a drink,” she says dragging me out of the suite, a buzz of whispers from the other women growing distant.

I’m surprised when we actually start standing in a drink line, but everything feels so surreal I can’t really comprehend anything.

Maeve orders two drinks and hands me one, I down it in one go.

“I’m so sorry,” her eyes are glossy and I don’t know how I’m not crying, not collapsing on the floor.

“I– I– I guess I don’t get it,” my words haven’t caught up with where my brain is already.

“I didn’t even realize you guys were still together. I mean, I don’t think the girl is that serious, but still.”

When I don’t respond she tries to fill the space, “I can take you back to Matt’s place and get your stuff. You can stay with me and Sam until you get a flight or whatever.”

I swallow hard around the thick ball of despair lodged in my throat.

“No,” I croak out, “I need to see him.”

Maeve just nods and we go back to the family suite and I act like nothing happened. I pretend the other woman doesn’t exist.

Maeve holds my hand the whole time.

We go down by the locker room when the game ends, we hang towards the back of the group.

Sam comes out and grins when he sees me. I can’t help but smile and relish the big bear hug he gives me. Then he sees what Maeve already sees: Matthew comes out of the locker room and the other woman practically throws herself at him, hanging off of him as she gives him a sloppy kiss.

Matthew pulls away as fast as he can, like somehow that will make her not exist.

His face crumples when he finally makes eye contact with me.

Finally, the smart person within me takes over. I march right up to him and smack him across the face. The sound reverberates in the hallway and I turn to walk away before I can see anyone’s reactions.

I don’t really know where I’m going, but I hear footsteps chasing after me and I know it’s Matthew.

“Baby,” he says as he takes hold of my wrist.

“Just take me back to your place Matthew, so I can get my stuff and get the fuck out of here.”

He thinks for a moment like he’s going to say something, but instead he just leads me to his car.

“Was she good? Did she make you come the way you like?” I sneer at him once he puts the car into drive.

He lets out a heavy and shaky sigh.

“You said you’d give me time to think about this, about us,” I don’t want to give him the satisfaction of my tears but I can only fight my body so much.

“Is this what giving me time means to you? Fucking someone else?”

He doesn’t say anything for a long while and I realize we’re parked in his driveway. I look over to see the redness from my slap blooming across his cheek, I take some pride in that.

“You hadn’t made any progress in months and you didn’t give me any signs that would change.”

“So, that makes this, okay? It’s my fault you found someone else?”

“Fuck, no, that’s not what I mean. I just never saw a world where you actually came down here and things with Casey just sort of happened.”

There’s something in the way he actually says her name that feels like an extra stab.

“She isn’t just a fuck buddy, is she?”

He shakes his head, “But–“

“No! You don’t get to justify things. You had a million chances to end it with me or tell me you didn’t want to be exclusive or literally anything else and you didn’t. I loved you so much I was willing to uproot my entire existence for you and you couldn’t even give me the decency of being honest.”

“I love you too.”

“I wish I could believe that.”

I stuff the few things I’ve taken out back into my bag, wanting to get out of here as soon as I can. But I leave my pros and cons list on the bed before I storm out.

I hope reading it keeps him up at night. Remembering how much I was willing to give up for him and how selfish he was instead. I hope my handwriting haunts him.

And maybe that makes me an idiot.

[wavetaxes]

Wave Taxes Inc: Your Trusted Accounting Firm in Canada. We provide expert tax and accounting services to individuals and businesses, ensuring compliance, financial clarity, and peace of mind. Let us navigate the complexities while you focus on growing and thriving. Discover a smoother financial journey with Wave Taxes Inc. visit us: https://wavetaxes.ca

[nspccalgary]

Tax & Accounting Services Calgary

Looking for reliable accounting services in Calgary? Look no further than NSPC Certified Public Accountants! Our team of experienced professionals is dedicated to providing comprehensive accounting solutions to meet the needs of businesses of all sizes. From bookkeeping and tax preparation to financial planning and reporting, we have the expertise to help you achieve your goals. Contact us today to learn more about how our services can benefit your business!

[mmtcpa]

8 Smart Reasons Freelancers Should Hire An Accountant

Unless you’re an accountant in your own right, here are eight reasons freelancers should be outsourcing tax preparation and financial planning to an accountant, starting today.

[saraccounting]

How Corporate Tax Return Calgary is done with us

Corporate taxes may be difficult, but you will face greater difficulties and fines the longer you wait to file your return. The professionals with us can assist you with any tax issues your business may be having and lessen the pressure of late tax filings with our knowledge!

Why make an independent attempt to manage your finances when a group of certified accountants can develop your company's tax strategy?

Using accounting software or paying strict attention to detail, the majority of individual tax returns may be prepared yearly with little difficulty. Our corporate tax return Calgary has intricate financial systems and must adhere to a lot more rules during tax season. Correct bookkeeping and an understanding of corporate taxes are required.

Keeping Money under Control

Many companies think they have control over their finances, but it's simple to overlook a few components of corporate taxation. These simple mistakes can lead to inaccurate or late tax filing, penalties, and reassessments, all of which can prolong the filing process.

If you find yourself facing a terrifying audit or appeals procedure, we can help you by using our knowledge of the Canada Revenue Agency and its rules to simplify your problems.

Understanding how the CRA works

The CRA regards corporation taxes very differently from how they approach personal and individual taxes. Corporate tax rates can vary, just like personal tax rates, therefore it's important to know how your specific business organization type is taxed. You will be able to decide how much of your money is taxed and how much is retained by the corporation by doing this. We can guarantee that your tax returns are submitted appropriately because they are familiar with how the CRA operates. They can also let you know what tax rate is applicable to your business.

Plan Your Corporation's Taxes

Preventing problems is usually preferable to trying to cure them. We can work with you to develop a tax strategy so you may focus more on your company and investments and less on the organization's financial stability.

[matrixaccountingcalgary]

https://matrixaccounting.ca/key-benefits-of-hiring-a-professional-tax-service/

Key Benefits of Hiring a Professional Tax Service

Hiring a professional tax service can offer several key benefits, making it a wise decision for individuals and businesses alike. hiring a professional tax service offers expertise, time savings, error prevention, audit support, and customized tax planning. It allows individuals and businesses to navigate the complexities of tax laws effectively, ensuring accurate and compliant tax filings while maximizing tax benefits and financial opportunities. https://matrixaccounting.ca/key-benefits-of-hiring-a-professional-tax-service/

[sameersomanica]

Accounting firm in Calgary

Are you looking for an accounting firm in Calgary Sameer Somani is a professional accounting firm that provides accounting and auditing services. their accounting firms to handle your business financial tasks and financial statements. such as taxing many of the services Sameer Somani firms offer. For more details visit our website or call us at 1-403-250-5587.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

KPMG audits the nursing homes it advises on how to beat audits

Tomorrow (May 10), I’m in VANCOUVER for a keynote at the Open Source Summit and a book event for Red Team Blues at Heritage Hall and on Thurs (May 11), I’m in CALGARY for Wordfest.

Auditors are capitalism’s lubricants, who keep the gears of finance capital smoothly a-whirl, allowing investors to move their money in and out of companies without having to go pore over their books and walk through their facilities. Without auditors, the gears of capitalism would grind themselves to dust:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/02/18/ink-stained-wretches/#countless

If you’d like an essay-formatted version of this thread to read or share, here’s a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/05/09/dingo-babysitter/#maybe-the-dingos-ate-your-nan

Unfortunately for capitalism, auditing is irredeemably broken. The Big Four auditors (PWC, EY, Deloitte and KPMG) have merged to monopoly, becoming “too big to fail” and “too big to jail.” These four gigantic firms have spun up fantastically lucrative “consulting” divisions that advise companies on how to cheat on their audits and attain incredible (paper) gains. The work of these “consultants” is worth far more than the accounting and auditing jobs the companies do, and the weaker the audits are, the more profitable the consulting is:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/06/04/aaronsw/#crooked-ref

This crisis has been a long time brewing. Back in 2001, the accounting/consulting giant Arthur Andersen was at the center of Enron’s fraud, which lit $11B in shareholder capital on fire. Enron had been making everyday people angry for years, engineering rolling blackouts and incredible energy-price gouging, but no one cares about working peoples’ complaints. By contrast, stealing $11B from rich people was something the authorities couldn’t ignore. They gave Andersen the death penalty, trying to teach the surviving accounting firms a lesson about what happens when you fuck with plutes.

But those other firms learned the wrong lesson: the collapse of Andersen was so disruptive that it soon became clear that the authorities would never take another giant consulting firm down, no matter how egregious its conduct was. They doubled down on crime, and then doubled down again.

It’s hard to pick a winner in the Big Four Accounting Firm Corruption Olympics, but KPMG is a strong contender, with a long history of just being monumentally inept and wrong. Back when Enron was unspooling, KPMG devoted itself to threatening people who linked to its website “without a license to do so”:

https://web.archive.org/web/20020207141547/http://chris.raettig.org/email/jnl00040.html

A couple years later, they declared war on wifi, trying to convince normies that wireless networks were an existential risk to human civilization:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/technology/2885339.stm

But there’s not much money in wifi scare stories or licenses to link. KPMG are good dialectical materialists, devoted to money over ideology, and boy did they figure out some wild ways to make money. For one thing, they figured out that they could get more accountants certified by cheating…on ethics exams:

https://www.marketwatch.com/story/the-kpmg-cheating-scandal-was-much-more-widespread-than-originally-thought-2019-06-18

KPMG’s top managers bribed regulators to give them the answer-sheets for ethics exams. What did they bribe those public employees with? Jobs at KPMG:

https://www.pogo.org/investigation/2020/01/how-accountants-took-washingtons-revolving-door-to-a-criminal-extreme

There’s hardly a month that goes by without another KPMG scandal somewhere in the world, with enormous monetary and social fallout. During the lockdowns, Justin Trudeau’s Liberal government outsourced the creation and maintenance of ArriveCAN (a contact tracing app for people who entered Canada) to a grifter called GC Strategies, who billed millions for their services. GC Strategies didn’t do any work — instead, they paid KPMG $1,000-$1,500 day to hire freelancers to build the app. The app itself was a catastrophic failure, and that failure didn’t just embarrass the government — it also failed to protect Canadians during a once-in-a-century global pandemic. KPMG raked off a 30% commission:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/01/31/mckinsey-and-canada/#comment-dit-beltway-bandits-en-canadien

In the USA, KPMG helped Microsoft work up a radioactively illegal tax-evasion scheme. Microsoft poured the millions it saved by cheating on its taxes into dark-money operations that lobbied to defund the IRS so that KPMG and Microsoft could cook up even more illegal tax-evasion schemes:

https://www.propublica.org/article/the-irs-decided-to-get-tough-against-microsoft-microsoft-got-tougher

But KPMG doesn’t content itself with screwing over everyday people and rotting our democratic institutions — it also engages in the dangerous business of helping billionaires steal from millionaires. KPMG was the auditor that signed off on the scam “oil company” Miller Energy Partners, a fraud that operated for years thanks to KPMG’s rubber-stamp on its crooked books:

https://www.desmog.com/2021/06/03/miller-energy-kpmg-auditors-oil-fraud/

The company was run by serial fraudsters with long rapsheets for stealing millions. They staffed their C-suite with executives from disgraced companies that had been busted for running Ponzi schemes, issuing press releases praising those execs’ “proven track records in raising capital.” KPMG ignored every red flag, ignored the hundreds of millions in fraud on the books — and when the whole thing came crashing down, the responsible KPMG partner kept his job for years, until retiring with a full and fat pension.

More recently, KPMG made millions by confidently certifying the stability of a large regional bank, assuring investors and depositors that it was managing its risk and could be trusted. The name of the client that KPMG was so bullish on will be familiar to you: Silicon Valley Bank:

https://www.wsj.com/articles/kpmg-faces-scrutiny-for-audits-of-svb-and-signature-bank-42dc49dd

KPMG epitomizes the idea of Too Big To Fail and Too Big to Jail. Despite being at the center of virtually every major finance scandal, it continues to thrive and grow. Remember the Carillion bust, in which billions went up in smoke and swathes of privatized government services vanished overnight? Not only did KPMG sign off on fraudulent Carillion books, but it escaped fines for doing so — and got paid to help administer Carillion’s bankruptcy:

https://www.reuters.com/business/finance/uk-watchdog-fines-kpmg-24-mln-over-carillion-regenersis-audits-2022-07-25/

Despite this, KPMG continues to find willing buyers for its services. After all, when the sector is dominated by four giant, lavishly corrupt firms, there’s not much choice in the matter:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/11/29/great-andersens-ghost/#mene-mene-bezzle

This is bad news for the investor class, of course, but it’s even worse news for the people who rely on the services that KPMG certifies, even as it helps grifters destroy them. Every kind of business relies on audits, from transit to aviation to day-care to eldercare.

Here’s a scary one for you: in Australia, the job of auditing residential eldercare homes’ compliance with safety and anti-abuse rules has been outsourced to KPMG. While KPMG earns a mid-sized fortune from these audits, it earns far more advising the owners of residential aged care homes on how to beat those audits:

https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2023/may/04/firm-performing-australian-aged-care-audit-also-charging-providers-for-expertise

KPMG says that the division that ensures the safety and dignity of elderly people is firewalled off from the division that advises companies on how to spend as little as possible on that safety and dignity — but KPMG also went to great lengths to keep the fact that it was selling services to both sides a secret.

Once the secret got out, an anonymous KPMG spokesmonster said, “When considering a request to perform an audit, we undertake a detailed process to ensure the engagement is free of conflicts.”

It’s hypothetically possible that this is true, but anyone who believes anything KPMG says is a sucker. The company’s rap-sheet goes back decades. This is, after all, a company that cheated on its ethics exams.

Catch me on tour with Red Team Blues in Vancouver, Calgary, Toronto, DC, Gaithersburg, Oxford, Hay, Manchester, Nottingham, London, and Berlin!

[Image ID: Two business-suited male figures seen side on; each has a bomb for a head, and each is holding a lit lighter that has ignited the other's fuse. Each bomb is wearing a green accountant's eyeshade. In the background is a fiery mushroom cloud. They wear KPMG logos on their lapels.]

Image:

Vectorportal.com (modified) https://vectorportal.com/vector/business-deal-illustration/23215

CC BY 4.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Inspired by an illustration by Matt Kenyon for the Financial Times: https://www.ft.com/content/07184d86-81cf-11e2-b050-00144feabdc0