#BUT THEN im like 36 is too far away i can’t even imagine turning 20 next year it’s not worth it

[evermoredeluxe]

.

[karasunonolibero]

2019 writing self-evaluation

so i did this over on my main last year, and since i had what i felt was a productive year, i wanted to do it here! i’ve included all works, from every fandom i wrote for, so there’s definitely a variety but also a clear distinction of when i stopped writing 1d and started writing for haikyuu, heh. anyway, i’m proud of all the work i’ve done this year, so here’s to 2020!

ALL FICS MUST HAVE POSTED ON AO3 IN 2019

1. Number of stories (including drabbles) posted to AO3: 50

2. Word count posted for the year: 147,038

3. List of works published this year (in order of posting):

two loves have i (5 january)

it’s only your imagination again (25 january)

the pain’s only temporary (8 february)

blow a kiss, fire a gun (9 may)

waiting to be found (14 may)

a swim with a shark (6 june)

sweet and lowdown (19 june)

one more time as if we planned it (24 june)

always be my thunder (23 july)

will your mouth read this truth (30 july)

tumblr drabbles & prompts (last updated 3 august)

I’m on my way up (’cos you make me bliss out) (completed 4 august) (collab with Rider_Of_Spades on ao3)

even mountains crumble into the sea (7 august)

we’re on each other’s team (14 august)

dangerous, tainted, flawed (20 august)

life can do terrible things (25 august)

the night before life goes on (1 september)

when the letter says a soldier’s coming home (17 september)

when the air ran out (19 september)

something missing tonight (21 september)

built castles from sand (26 september)

underneath the stars we came alive (8 october)

sweet talk and sugar (10 october)

got my name on this treasure (11 october)

just a little taste, babe (14 october)

iwaoi horror week drabbles (completed 1 november)

don’t let the tide come (31 october)

daisuga week drabbles (completed 24 november)

how (not) to put on a condom (26 november)

taste the tension, now i’m begging (2 december)

kiss the boy (7 december)

till tonight do us part (11 december)

i wish i could be there now (13 december)

on our way to twenty-seven (15 december)

for the dream far away (24 december)

a collar full of chemistry (25 december)

fall down and commune with me (28 december)

a little of love’s electricity (31 december)

the city is at war (last updated 31 december)

4. Fandoms I wrote for: (stats pulled from the ao3 filter feature on my works)

haikyuu!! (41)

one direction (9)

the legend of zelda: breath of the wild (3)

all time low (1)

crystalline (1)

5. Pairings: (i didn’t count side or past pairings)

iwaizumi hajime/oikawa tooru (14)

sawamura daichi/sugawara koushi (13)

oikawa tooru/sugawara koushi (4)

azumane asahi/nishinoya yuu (3)

kuroo tetsurou/sawamura daichi (2)

kuroo tetsurou/yaku morisuke (1)

akaashi keiji/oikawa tooru (1)

sawamura daichi/sugawara koushi/terushima yuuji (1)

sawamura daichi/terushima yuuji (1)

sugawara koushi/terushima yuuji (1)

link/revali (1)

mipha/zelda (1)

louis tomlinson/harry styles (5)

louis tomlinson/zayn malik (1)

alex gaskarth/louis tomlinson (1)

liam payne/louis tomlinson (1)

zack spade/pixel fade (1)

6. Story with the most:

Kudos: two loves have i (275)

Bookmarks: two loves have i (34)

Comments: two loves have i (25)

9. Work I’m most proud of (and why):

on our way to twenty-seven! i was digging into some identity and sexuality issues that i myself have dealt with in the past and writing about it was the first time i’d really dove into some of that stuff, so i really enjoyed writing it and i think it’s some of my best.

i’m also really proud of i’m taking back the crown and i wish i could say why. i just really like the way it came out. writing oikawa as this desperate dethroned prince trying to reclaim his kingdom at any cost only to be beaten at his own game in his own home was just...ugh. it was so much fun to write.

10. Work I’m least proud of (and why):

one more time as if we planned it, definitely. i just felt super rushed writing it. it was for the one direction rarepair fest, which was super fun, but i had Just finished a longer fic a few days before this one was due and i initially tried to drop out because i thought i wouldn’t be able to finish it, but i did, but i still feel like it’s rushed and just not as good as it could have been if i’d planned better and given it some more time.

11. A favorite excerpt of your writing:

im gonna do what i did last year and post more than one, because 1. i can’t decide and 2. i quite honestly am pretty proud of a lot of what i wrote this year

from when the letter says a soldier’s coming home —

Tooru’s squealing somewhere behind them, and Hajime’s gruffly trying to get out the door, and he’ll have to call the school and make up something about being sick so he can spend the day catching up with Daichi, but it can wait. It can all wait. Because Koushi’s waited long enough. It’s about time the rest of the world waits for him.

from strawberries on a summer evening —

Suga hums against him, licking strawberry seeds from between Daichi’s teeth, like he’s just as intoxicated by Daichi as Daichi is with him. Daichi could live here, in this feeling, ignoring everything except how Suga sounds (like bliss personified), smells (like sunblock and sweat), tastes (like sugar and salt). He’s the hottest part of the summer, high noon in mid-August, just this side of too much to handle, but addicting in how it leaves you at its mercy.

from on our way to twenty-seven —

“Sorry, what was your name again?”

Tetsurou opens his mouth to say his American name, but he catches Daichi and Suga looking at him, and he swallows it down. “My name is Tetsurou. Tetsurou Kuroo.”

“I thought you wanted people to call you Tyler,” Timothy says.

Tetsurou shoots him a glare and says it again, feeling his confidence start to grow. “My name is Tetsurou Kuroo. Tetsu is fine, too, but I don’t go by Tyler anymore.”

12. Share or describe a favorite review you received:

any time tasteofsummersnow left me a comment, it made my heart go doki doki!! her comments are so in depth and so very sweet and it’s so much fun to see her real-time reactions to my writing. i go back and reread them like once a week they’re so nice ;_;

13. A time when writing was really, really hard:

the spring/early summer in general was tough, like from march to june. i didn’t post anything between february and may, and i feel like i was struggling a lot creatively around like may/june of this year. i think it’s because a lot of stuff in the 1d fandom was really turning me off at the time and that’s when the burnout fully hit.

14. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you:

definitely sugawara in the city is at war. i was writing that first chapter and initially i just wanted to see him step up when daichi wasn’t around but he very quickly turned sadistic and ruthless and scarily sharp, which is just so much fun to write him as. and his relationship with daichi is just—ugh. love that violence-fueled romance. they would kill a hundred men for each other and be turned on once they were finished.

honestly, all of the city is at war has surprised me. the idea came to me in a dream on a long bus ride, of all the clan leaders having a meeting and being attacked, and i woke up and banged it out in 36 hours. i meant it to be a oneshot but as i wrote it, i realized i loved the au so much there was no way i could leave it at that. so now it’s got a whole plot and all that. fun!

15. How did you grow as a writer this year:

last year i said i felt i grew writing angst and exploring different emotional themes, and i think i built on that even more this year. i did a bunch of shorter pieces this year and i feel a lot of them really explored emotions and characters more than plot, and that’s been so much fun. and then as well, like i said before, i’ve branched out into the crime-action genre with the yakuza au. and! iwaoi horror week was my first real attempt at spooky/creepy/horror-type writing, and, it was a fun challenge for sure.

i also said i wanted to just keep writing and be spontaneous and i definitely did that this year. i posted so many fics not caring how long it had been since the last one—sometimes it was less a day. numbers stopped mattering to me. i posted just because i wanted to put my writing out there and share it with the world, knowing there had to be someone out there who’d like it.

16. How do you hope to grow next year:

i feel like 2019 was a year of trying a lot of new things, so in 2020 i’m hoping to explore some different ships and tropes. the sheer number of characters and ships in haikyuu means there’s a ship for just about every trope and au out there, and i want to play around with some dynamics i’ve never written before.

17. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc):

as always, a shoutout to the loggies, who have been a fantastic source of inspiration and support all year even after i retired from 1d fic. and i would also like to thank the people i met via various hq discord servers—you know who you are!! thank you for the sprints, the encouragement, the inspiration, and the friendship. as someone brand new to the fandom, the support and sense of community has been nothing short of amazing, and you guys are part of the reason i felt so comfortable in this fandom so quickly.

18. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year:

actually, yeah. even mountains crumble into the sea was written the night before i broke up with my ex. i wrote it as an exercise to get all my feelings out, lay them all on the table where i could see them and pick through them, and then imagine the best possible way the scenario could go.

19. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers:

honestly—just write! write what you’re happy with. write even if you don’t post it. write, because everything you do is practice that’ll help you improve.

and don’t be afraid to write out of order or write more than one project at a time. i know that won’t work for everyone, but for me, if i didn’t immediately write what was on my mind, i probably wouldn’t have posted half of what i did this year.

20. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year:

hey remember last year when i said i was gonna finish the breath of the wild au?? L M A O i’m really gonna finish it next year i swear!!

i have a fic posting in the spring for the nsfw big bang which i’m ALSO very excited about! i’m lucky to be working with such a talented artist and the end result is gonna be amazing and i’m so so excited.

i also want to keep going with the city is at war, because that plot was a pleasant surprise. and there’s an ever-growing list of fic ideas and aus that i’m so excited to write—some of them were originally for larry aus but i’ve repurposed them for haikyuu pairings and that’s helped breathe new life into some old ideas.

21. Tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read.

anyone who sees this and wants to do it! just tag me, i wanna read your answers!

[captivatingalyeska]

Day 1: My room turned into a ocean. I swear I found fishes and sharks swarming into my lungs. Or maybe that was the remains of you trying not to escape but desperately needing to

Day 2: You weren’t at school today and I should’ve been happy, I was more sad

Day 3: I thought I was ready to move on, then I saw you with her.

Day 4: We haven’t spoken in days now. My mind thinks its being shoved off a cliff.

Day 5: I wish it would just hit the bottom

Day 6: This will be the first weekend we dont hang out. I know you’ll be seeing her and I know you’ll be smiling without me. I’m trying hard to learn how to too

Day 7: I asked you for help on a history assignment and you replied with “Ask Amber im busy”. I texted back: “Tell Emma I said hi”

Day 8: You posted a video with her on the only social media site you have. When I saw it I erupted. I spewed lava every where, oh god its every where

Day 9: My mom made me sleep next to her on the couch. She was afraid I would try and do something like I did two years ago when another guy tore up my heart. I actually had thought about it

Day 10: I slept in your sweatshirt one last time so I can feel myself engulfed in you. I know you wanted them back so I had to feel you and smell you just once more.

Day 11: I gave you all of your stuff back and you thought I looked like a warrior but really I went home and tried getting you out of my bloodstream

Day 12: When will my eyes stop flowing?

Day 13: I snuck out with a boy and smoked weed on his couch. He talked about love and how much it hurt. I only pictured you.

Day 14: I woke up next to that same boy and I woke up screaming. The boy was worried and confused but I knew why I screamed. I imagined you laying with another girl on your couch. I ran out of his house so fast you'd think Id be better at running from you.

Day 15: It’s spring break and I’m with my best friend and your with her and I swear I can feel you tracing her spine the way you used to trace mine

Day 16: I ignored your birthday and it felt worse than the puking I did that night

Day 17: I’m treading icy water while you’re swimming away searching for warmth. I guess I just hope you’ll loop around and find your way back to the shattered, but still there, us

Day 18: I don’t remember the sound of your voice. I don’t remember the color of your eyes. I don’t remember your the taste of your lips. I can’t feel your hands on mine or on my body. I don’t remember how soft your hair is. I must forget, all of it

Day 19: No amount of screaming gets your name out of my head

Day 20: I got on a plane today and when we took off I swear I almost walked to the door and started flying

Day 21: They say it takes 21 days to break a habit but I think I just manage to fall more in love with a greedy monster

Day 22: I saw you today and wished you a happy late birthday and promised we’d watch the third Hobbit together. I’m beginning to hate myself more

Day 23: Its the end of the month maybe next month won’t be filled with thoughts of you and killing myself. I think I’m beginning to get over you

Day 24: April fools

Day 25: I think I understand now. When you first told me you loved me your mouth curled up on the edges, two days before you left when I gave my bare self to you your mouth was a straight line as you muttered “love you”

Day 26: If you’re trying to kill me it’s working

Day 27: I woke up this morning to my blankets and pillows piled in a corner in my room. It’s something a ghost would do to make his presence known. I’m haunting myself, or maybe its the ghost of us taking over my body

Day 28: It’s almost been a month since you told me it was never me. I almost texted you happy easter but I saw those text messages we last sent and just got angry

Day 29: I hate that you act like you didnt break my heart. I hate that you think I’m fine that I’m not writing a shit poem about your shit personality

Day 30: Thirty days since you’ve wanted me. Thirty days since I told you I love you. Thirty days since you’ve slipped from my fingers. I tried catching you. You’ve been gone far too long. Thirty days is too long

Day 31: I had a nightmare last night about you. You told me you loved me and kissed my forehead. I woke up breathing heavily and shaking. I want you out of my life

Day 32: Running on no sleep isn’t fun

Day 33: I’ve been awake for over 50 hours in fear that I’ll see you in my dreams again. I cant risk that. It hurts so much. Get out of my head

Day 34: My mother told me that love will do this. That its cruel and torturous and breaks you into such little pieces not even she can pick them all up. You know where they all are, please come back and pick them up

Day 35: I talked to another guy last night we stayed up late and he asked me questions about you. We were sober so it wasn’t easy spitting up vowels and similies and euphemisms explaining the empty feeling in my chest after you left

Day 36: Fuck if i stopped seeing you everyday I swear I’d be over you.

Day 37: My knee didnt touch your leg like it used it I promise I didnt do that fuck

Day 38: You told me that the wrinkles on my leg bothered you when I sat down. That’s not what you said when we were trying not to get caught in the back of your car

Day 39: You told me you’d take me to prom and in two days it’ll just be another day you promised to spend with me. It’s funny how our plans turned to dust in a matter of seconds after cleaning

Day 40: The thunderstorm of us was inside of you and maybe that’s why it felt so close. I keep counting the seconds between the boom and light hoping you arent moving away but I fear that you are already letting others feel your storm. The plants you grew are dying, maybe you should come back to water them

Day 41: Ten days since its been a month since you left. I cried at prom because all I could look for in the crowd was you.

Day 42: I got so drunk all I could see was your face. The guy I fucked kept telling me his name wasn’t yours. I cant even scream and cry anymore, I’m burnt out. You’re all I still think about despite your efforts to continue to push me away

Day 43: I should be getting high today but if I do I’ll just write more shitty poems and think more about a shitty guy who will never care

Day 44: I think I’m trying to gain feelings for someone else because it’ll make moving on from you easier. I’m afraid to write that it hasn’t

Day 45: You traced my leg like you used to. It was like dandelion tea. It made my insides fill with happiness, you’re my yellow paint.

Day 46: Van Gogh used to eat yellow paint because he thought it would put happiness inside him. He would consume it everyday in the hopes that it would bring his sadness to rest despite the fact that it could kill him first. I guess you were my yellow paint, emphasis on the were. See, I’m not going to write about you anymore, because when I write you down I’m under the impression that you’ll stay with the words but you don’t. This is the last sentence I’ll ever write about you

[pentopaper23]

UPDATED PROMPT LIST!

This is an updates list for the prompts that have already been sent in :) I will post one of these after every 10 asks, so that we don’t get any double ups.  

When sending in an ask, please please please add the ship and number!! 

Otherwise I have to guess the ship and I would hate to pick the wrong one for you guys, which has already happened and I got a rather nasty message saying I didn’t answer the ask right and “if you're not going to do what your followers ask then don’t post a prompt list” 

and as im being honest with you all, I cant even handle picking what to have for dinner don’t put this on me! 

1. “Why are we at a strip club?” 2. “I’m sorry, you said what to your teacher?” 3. “Am I dead?” 4. “It’s always been you. You and only you.” 5. “If you loved me, you’d fight for it. If you loved me, you’d show it. If you loved me, you’d fight for me. Do you even know what love is?” 6. “Stay with me.” 7. “How about we put the gun down and talk about this?” 8. “I came here to kick ass and chew gum.. and I’m all out of gum.” 9. “Whatever it is I didn’t do it.” 10. “Don’t make me regret saving you.” 11. “Are you-are you flirting with me?” 12. “I’m proud of you. I’m proud of us.” 13. “I trusted you.” 14. “Am I supposed to be impressed?” 15. “Don’t tempt me.” 16. “I’m going to kiss you now.” 17. “Is that my shirt?” 18. “Would you quit moving around?” “It’s not my fault we’re tied up together!” 19. “Does your life revolve around embarrassing me?” 20. “I can’t do this anymore.” 21. “Do you smell burning?” 22. “Look at the sky.” 23. “I didn’t know you could do that.” 24. “I will not hesitate to murder you.” 25. “It’s simple really. Here let me show you.” 26. “I’m pretty sure that’s not how it works.” 27. “Hey have you seen my- Oh.” 28. “Go to hell.” “Already been but thanks for the invite.” 29. “Look at me.” 30. “Go away! I don’t ever want to see you again!” 31. “Don’t tell me how to calm down, you calm down!” 32. “Where did you get that?” 33. “Oh my gosh is that blood?” 34. “What are you doing here by yourself?” 35. “Here, take my hand. Everything is fine, just hold onto me and keep moving.” 36. “I don’t know who I am without you.” 37. “You don’t need to protect me.” 38. “Stop looking at me like that!” 39. “I can’t believe you talked me into this.” 40. “All I wanted was the truth.” 41. “I had a nightmare about you, and I wanted to make sure you were alright.” 42. “You make me feel like I’m not good enough.” 43. “I told you not to fall in love with me.” 44. “I forgive a lot, but I never forget what was said and done.” 45. “Again?” 46. “Please shut up. Just shut up.” 47. “I’m tired of being your secret.” 48. “You know, it’s okay to cry.” 49. “Go on, tell me. Tell me you don’t love me.” 50. “I just want to be alone right now.” 51. “Those things you said yesterday.. did you really mean them?” 52. “Just say it is okay. I just need to hear you say that.” 53. “I love you and I am terrified.” 54. “Promise me you’ll come back.. I need you to promise me.” 55. “That’s distracting.” 56. “I think I picked up your coffee by mistake.” 57. “Wait a second.. are you jealous?” 58. “This is by far the most stupid plan you’ve ever created. Of course I’m in.” 59. “You did this for me?” 60. “I’m afraid this conversation is going to end in goodbye.” 61. “Would you just hold still?” 62. “We’re running low on time here.” 63. “You’ve got something on your cheek.” 64. “I’m not bothering you, am I?” 65. “Really, right now?” 66. “Wait, you’re my soulmate?” 67. “I really wish you told me your mother was in town.” 68. “You’re wrong and I’ll prove it.” 69. “I can never say no to a picnic.” 70. “I could tell it was your favorite book from all the notes you wrote in the margins.” 71. “I never imagined myself in a wedding dress.” 72. “I’m yours, in every way possible.” 73. “We’re not just friends, and you know it.” 74. “Well. Yell, scream, say something, anything.” 75. “Where do you think you’re going?” 76. “Nobody thinks what I think.” 77. “Despite what you think, I am completely capable of taking care of myself.” 78. “Just please be my best friend right now, and not the person I confessed my love to.” 79. “I think you’re just afraid to be happy.” 80. “Make me.” 81. “Well if you insist.” 82. “We’ll get through this, I promise.” 83. “I can’t believe you don’t like Disney movies.” 84. “You’re lucky you’re cute.” 85. “Sometimes I really dislike you.” 86. “You’re getting crumbs all over my bed.” 87. “It’s too early for this.” 88. “But then I’d have to put pants on..” 89. “If my parents knew what I was doing they’d kill me.” 90. “Are you trying to make me to hate you? Because it’s working.” 91. “Don’t open those till later!” 92. “For some reason I’m attracted to you.” 93. “To be honest I could care less.” 94. “Go on then, tell me. Tell me you don’t love me.” 95. “Hold my hand, we have to make this look convincing!” 96. “I’ll make it right for you.” 97. “When you smile I fall apart.” 98. “I don’t know what I did to deserve you.” 99. “I really don’t know why I’m crying.” 100. “I won’t let you fall.” 101. “I’m like 20% sure this plan work. There’s an 80% chance we could die horribly and violently, but this plan is solid, I swear.” 102. “I’m not happy here.” 103. “I’m so stupid to make the mistake of falling in love with my best friend.” 104. “I’m tired of being your secret.” 105. “Well if you’re up for the challenge.” 106. “I’ve moved on.” 107. “I’ve seen the way you look at me when you don’t think I can see you.” 108. “If I die, I am coming back to haunt you.” 109. “If you don’t want to talk about it then say so. Don’t lie and pretend to be fine when you clearly aren’t.” 110. “If you walk out that door don’t you dare think about coming back.” 111. “Is that a challenge?” 112. “Is it supposed to look like that? Are you sure?” 113. “I made you cupcakes cause I knew you liked them.” 114. “Is there something you want to tell me?” 115. “I mean, it could be worse.” 116. “This wasn’t supposed to happen like this.” 117. “This was all a dream?” 118. “It’s not what it looks like.” 119. “It’s okay I’m here for you.” 120. “Wait, you did what again?” 121. “Just talk to me.” 122. “Just leave me alone!” 123. “Let him go! It’s me who you want!” 124. “My parents asked about you again.” 125. “Make a wish.” 126. “None of this makes sense.” 127. “None of that matters anymore.” 128. “Wait this is your handwriting? I thought this was hieroglyphics.” 129. “Not a day goes by that I don’t think of you.” 130. “Oh my god! You’re in love with her!” 131. “Please don’t give up on me.” 132. “Please listen to me.” 133. “Please don’t go.” 134. “Please.. I love you.” 135. “Please, take me instead!” 136. “Please don’t leave me.” 137. “Please don’t argue with me.” 138. “Promise me you’ll take care of her/him.” 139. “Promise me you’ll take better care of yourself.” 140. “Promise me you’ll stay.” 141. “Why are you taking so many photos?” 142. “I didn’t know you could play.” 143. “You can sing?” 144. “Teach me how to play?” 145. “Are you okay?” “Why do you ask?” “Because you’re wearing two different shoes.” 146. “Want to talk about it?” 147. “I just really miss talking with you.” 148. “Things don’t always turn out the way we want them to.” 149. “This isn’t just about you. It’s about what’s best for all of us.” 150. “You made me what?” 151. “Times up!” 152. “There’s something I need to tell you.” 153. “We could’ve had it all.” 154. “Are you sure you two aren’t married?” 155. “Well.. don’t keep me waiting.” 156. “Please look at me.” 157. “What have I ever done to you?” 158. “What are you doing here?” 159. “When are you going to realize I don’t care?” 160. “When you love someone, you just don’t stop. Ever. Even when people stop to roll their eyes or call you crazy.. even then. Especially then!” 161. “Where did that cat come from?” 162. “Where did you get this from?” 163. “Why are you up so early?” 164. “Why can’t they see they’re meant for each another?” 165. “Why did you choose me?” 166. “Why don’t you say it to my face?” 167. “Why couldn’t you come to me with your problems?” 168. “Would you stop for a second so I can say something to you for once!” 169. “You need to calm down.” 170. “I know you told me to stop thinking about you, but I can’t get you out of my mind.” 171. “You are nothing like them.” 172. “You were the greatest thing that ever happened to me.” 173. “I never believed in love till I met you.” 174. “I don’t need a Prince Charming saving me.” 175. “You can’t sit on the sidelines your entire life!” 176. “You deserve so much better.” 177. “You did all of this for me?” 178. “You take my love for granted.” 179. “You haven’t even touched your food.. what’s going on?” 180. “You know my name?” 181. “You need to wake up because I can’t do this on my own.” 182. “Stay the night. Please.” 183. “What did you say?” 184. “Why are you so annoying?” 185. “Don’t ask me that.” 186. “Don’t ever mention that again.” 187. “What’s with the box?” 188. “Say it!” 189. “Stop pinning this on me! You started it!” 190. “Did you do this on purpose?” 191. “Don’t give me that look! You started it!” 192. “It’s not fair!” 193. “I could kill you right now!” 194. “Don’t you dare give me that look!” 195. “Screw you!” 196. “Just shut up already.” 197. “You are so infuriating. 198. “Listen to me!” 199. “I dare you!” 200. “Please pretend to be my girlfriend/boyfriend.” 201. “You think I’m insensible enough to fall for that?” 202. “I’m not going to apologize. I can’t anymore.” 203. “Is this seat taken?” 204. “It’s midnight, what do you want?” 205. “You are strangely comfortable.” 206. “Imagine if it could always be this way, even in the city.” 207. “I don’t know how to feel any more.” 208. “At what point did you think that was a good idea?” 209. “Just marry me already.” 210. “Did I stutter?” 211. “Did I just say that out loud?” 212. “Did you hear that.” 213. “Don’t say you love me.” 214. “Don’t you ever do that again.” 215. “Everyone deserves a second chance.” 216. “I try so hard to forget you, but every single time it comes back to you.” 217. “H-How long have you been standing there?” 218. “Hey, I’m with you, okay? Always.” 219. “I didn’t ask for any of this! But do you know what I put up with it all? Because I love you!” 220. “I just need you here with me right now.” 221. “I love you. I’ve loved you since the moment I laid eyes on you and- Oh screw it!” 222. “We can’t lose each other, we just can’t.” 223. “I’ve never felt this way before and I’m terrified to be honest.” 224. “I never meant for anyone to get hurt.” 225. “I waited and waited, but you never came back!” 226. “I’m sick of feeling useless!” 227. “Is that what you call an apology?” 228. “Is there anything you want to tell me?” 229. “Somebody’s in love!” 230. “It’s not what it looks like.” 231. “Just hold me.” 232. “You’re the best part of me.” 233. “I don’t want to think about what I’d be like without you.” 234. “Can I hold your hand?”235. “Let’s go get lost somewhere.”236. “I just don’t know how to look forward anymore. 

[academicsapphic]

70 questions tag

i was tagged by @academicsapphic​ omg thank you so much!!!

01: do you have a good relationship with your parents? yeah, i like to think so. it’s better when i don’t have to live with them, as is my relationship with my entire family. you know what they say about absence

02: who did you last say “i love you” to? my dad

03: do you regret anything? so many things but can’t change it so 

04: are you insecure? literally all the time!!! i don’t know what it’s like to have confidence or to not hate yourself!! maybe someday!!!

05: what is your relationship status? single, as it has been for 18.5 years, as it will be for 18 more

06: how do you want to die? i truly don’t care as long as it’s painless. i don’t wanna feel shit.

07: what did you last eat? 2 scrambled eggs, a handful of spinach and 1/2 cup of onion

08: played any sports?

i briefly played basketball and did cheerleading and gymnastics as a young kid, but i play softball for like 12 years on and off. wish id stuck with cheerleading though that shit’s amazing

09: do you bite your nails? yes as long as i can remember. and now when i let them grow out, they grow away from my 

10: when was your last physical fight? never been in one. i talk about how i wanna fight literally all the time but if it came down to it i’d either run or get my ass beat

11: do you like someone? after a whole year of liking girls who turned out to be straight and white boys who all disappointed me, i’m tryna stop cause i’m tired of getting my feelings hurt. it’s not cute.

12: have you ever stayed up 48 hours? i think i stayed up almost that long at the beginning of freshman year

13: do you hate anyone at the moment? i’m sure there’s lots of people i am a small person filled with hate and rage

14: do you miss someone? my friends and my freedom. does that count as a someone?

15: have any pets? we have a dog at home, but i individually don’t. i might get a therapy cat someday at school we’ll see

16: how exactly are you feeling at the moment? tired and bored and mad cause it’s hot outside

17: ever made out in the bathroom? no why that location? seems gross

18: are you scared of spiders? horrified to an unnatural degree. i have a really awful fear of bugs and it’s ruining my life

19: would you go back in time if you were given the chance? fuck no i’m black my ass would be grass i don’t even wanna be in this current time i’m tryna go 100 years forward

20: where was the last place you snogged someone? my imagination

21: what are your plans for this weekend? sleep, exercise, chill

22: do you want to have kids? how many? i’m 100% sure that i don’t ever want to give birth. that shit is so painful i dont understand why anyone would ever do that voluntarily. my period cramps are severe enough to make me wanna kill myself. if i have kids, we’re adopting or surrogate or something like i refuse. never in my life. also kids are a massive huge responsibility which you can never get rid of and that terrifies me. i’ll begin to consider having kids in ten years, but right now it’s a hard no.

23: do you have piercings? how many? ears, 2.

24: what is/are/were your best subject(s)? in high school, i consistently got A’s in my english and humanities classes, in college the only class i’ve got an A in so far is italian

25: do you miss anyone from your past? no? not really. if you’re in my past i probably hate you and that’s why you’re not in my present.

26: what are you craving right now? i try to distract myself from wanting food or being hungry cause i’m trying to lose weight and i’ll drive myself mad

27: have you ever broken someone’s heart? lol no. does my best friend in the 9th grade who told me he liked me then i stopped talking to him for a solid six months count? i doubt it.

28: have you ever been cheated on? can’t be cheated on when you’re single 😏

29: have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? never had one

30: what’s irritating you right now? the fact that summer is a thing and the fact that bugs exist

31: does somebody love you? yeah, lots of people im sure

32: what is your favourite colour? purple

33: do you have trust issues? i mean i guess kinda? i’m just really insecure with myself and afraid of people hurting me but also i trust really easy so i’ve clearly learned nothing

34: who/what was your last dream about? i don’t remember 

35: who was the last person you cried in front of? i normally don’t cry in front of other people, but i think when i had just got home from school and i was in the car with my parents and they started grilling me about my major and how bad i did first year and i had been holding it in for so long cause that whole year i literally thought i was gonna kill myself that i just had a breakdown, i mean sobbing so hard i was incoherent. then i spent all of lunch trying not to cry again. it was a mess.

36: do you give out second chances too easily? lol not anymore, since i got to college if you even slightly wrong me one time, im fuckin done with you. permanently.

37: is it easier to forgive or forget? forget

38: is this year the best year of your life? my first year of college was simultaneously the best and worst time ever? idk but i’m really excited to go back

39: how old were you when you had your first kiss? i haven’t had it yet 👍🏾

40: have you ever walked outside completely naked? no why would anyone?

51: favourite food? italian food, french fries, honestly potatoes in all forms, ice cream, chocolate anything, things i wish i could eat right now but i cant.

52: do you believe everything happens for a reason? yes this belief is the only thing that keeps me sane sometimes when i want something so bad but cant have it

53: what is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? watched fitness and weight loss videos cause i do that every night cause im pathetic

54: is cheating ever okay? no and people keep trying to normalize it and im like???? fuck off

55: are you mean? i definitely can be

56: how many people have you fist fought? none

57: do you believe in true love? more than anything else, i guess

58: favourite weather? raining, cloudy, overcast, dark, just anything where the sun is gone

59: do you like the snow? yes, but i guess cause i live in nashville and we don’t get a lot so it’s not a hassle

60: do you wanna get married? yes so much :’( but also i dont really care about the legal part, i kinda just want a nice ceremony. i might just do the ceremony without getting married

61: is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? wouldn’t know

62: what makes you happy? being at school, listening to music, when i finally write a song that i don’t completely hate, eating

63: would you change your name? no cause i don’t hate it and i wouldn’t know what to change it to

64: would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? i don’t understand this. is there supposed to be context?

65: your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?  

*i just wanna say i don’t like term “opposite sex/gender” cause as we know, these things are a spectrum and there are no opposites cause theres more than two. for the sake of these questions, im gonna assume it means a guy cause im a girl but know i dont like it i’ve been in this situation and if a) they know i know/they told me, i get super uncomfortable and stop talking to them, or b) if they don’t know i know, i get super uncomfortable and try to send them a bunch of signals i only like them platonically so they’ll get the hint and never ever bring it up ever

66: do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? i have close friends of all genders so yeah

67: who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? assuming a guy again idk my dad? or one of my bosses

68: who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? can’t remember, probably one of my friends at school i don’t have many of those

69: do you believe in soulmates? yes i love that idea, i think it ties it with everything happens for a reason

70: is there anyone you would die for? i would die for any girl i just ran into on the street, god i love girls

thanks for observing this overshare 👍🏾  at least it kept me busy

[wholesome-lesbiab]

Wanna do all the numbers?

I assume you mean the “wanna be nosy” post? If not, blame the sleep deprivation and here it is anyway. You really want me to do all of them? All 44?? Well ok I’m only doing it because I can’t sleep and im bored

0:Height: 187 cm or 6′1 ? idk how you say it in inches1:Virgin?  Yea2:Shoe size  393:Do you smoke?  nah4:Do you drink?  Oh how I wish I had a bottle of vodka rn. Yes.5:Do you take drugs?  no6:Age you get mistaken for  17 goddamnit I hate that one bussdriver who always asks that7:Have tattoos?  I wish8:Want any tattoos?  Yeah9:Got any piercings? Yup, earrings10:Want any piercings? I think I’m ok with just the lame earrings 11:Best friend? Two best people I have had the blessing to be friends with for over 15 years. I love them so much 12:Relationship status Single and not ready to mingle13:Biggest turn ons  a kickass gaming computer and huge game collection14:Biggest turn offs  Being too pushy 15:Favorite movie  Uhhhhhh.... Impossible to pick one so I’m just gonna say all the POTC movies because they are my life16:I’ll love you if  take me to a museum17:Someone you miss  My best friends18:Most traumatic experience  First thing to come to my mind was that one day as a kid when I was walking my dog and a large dog attacked her out of nowhere, ripping a huge piece of her skin and making her flee. 19:A fact about your personality I’m awkward when I meet new people but oh boy do I still try and embarrass myself20:What I hate most about myself Not being able to sleep, among the many other thins I hate about myself but that’s just the “depressed sleep-deprived me” talking. 21:What I love most about myself The “depressed sleep-deprived me” doesn’t know what to answer to this lmao. If you ask me again when I have slept for two days straight, I might be able to give a proper answer22:What I want to be when I get older  Well slept. Also a history professor23:My relationship with my sibling(s)  We have that weird “we hate each other but deep down we care about each other but are too stupid to actually show it”. There are six of us and we like to say more “I hate you” than “I love you”. I can’t see myself ever saying that to any of my siblings. Does that sound too mean? Not in this family.24:My relationship with my parent(s) It’s ok, better than it used to be25:My idea of a perfect date TAKE ME TO A MUSEUM GODDAMNIT26:My biggest pet peeves  I dont really know27:A description of the girl/boy I like I havent felt romantically attracted to a guy in ages so idk28:A description of the person I dislike the most HOOO BOY she’s a one - nvm I’m not gonna be mean it’s all in the past and I have totally not forgiven her 29:A reason I’ve lied to a friend Maybe just to make myself look better/cooler30:What I hate the most about work/school The teachers are horrible and not supportive at all31:What your last text message says My... social security number hah hah32:What words upset me the most there was this one word but I cant remember what it was33:What words make me feel the best about myself I dont really know34:What I find attractive in women their make up skills35:What I find attractive in men their make up skills and some other stuff36:Where I would like to live far away from this god forbidden land37:One of my insecurities For so long it used to be my height and thin figure but now it’s just the acne38:My childhood career choice an actress. What was I even thinking? Even imagining myself on stage gives me an anxiety attack39:My favorite ice cream flavor chocolate40:Who wish I could be someone able to get decent hours of sleep every night. Also wealthy41:Where I want to be right now Away42:The last thing I ate Chocolate43:Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately Jensen Ackles44:A random fact about anything I was told to lie about my height in one model competition a while ago because the person who said that thought I was too tall. When I was being interviewed, the judge asked if I really was the height I told him (186cm as I was told to lie. Just one centimeter change. Why?) The judge was clearly baffled of my height, even slightly mockingly, so I swallowed my pride and lied about my height even tho I have been so long proud about it. I hated myself because I couldn’t just say “no, in fact I’m slightly taller”. It left a bad taste in my mouth because I couldn’t stay true to myself. I know it’s just a centimeter difference but it means a lot to me. I just hate it when i’m apparently “too tall” 

If anyone read this far I applaud to you and thanks for asking.

[auxon]

tagged by @sneezingbeagle​

god the formatting on this is awful sorry but i cant really be assed to fix it. also it’s very long so i’ll put it under a cut

Rules: once you have been tagged you are supposed to write 92 truths about yourself. at the end choose 25 people to tag.

LAST: 1. drink: ginger tea 2. phone call: uhhhh god i don’t even know, a few weeks ago i had to call customer service for something so i guess that 3. text message: "nerd” to @dragon-cabbage​ 4. song listened to: working man - imagine dragons 5. time i cried: yesterday but like out of happiness and only a little bit HAVE YOU EVER: 6. dated somebody twice: technically but we were only not dating for like a week 7. been cheated on: not as far as i know 8. kissed someone and regretted it: mmm yeah 9. lost someone special: in a way i guess 10. been depressed: yeah 11. gotten drunk and puked: i’ve never been drunk so no THREE FAVOURITE COLOURS: 12. lmao i don’t even have favorite colors anymore 13. i wear a lot of blue because it’s a safe color but it doesn’t excite me 14. i like black with bright colors as highlights IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU: 15. made new friends: i think so 16. fallen out of love: yeah lmao 17. laughed until you cried: don’t think so 18. found out someone was gossiping about you: no??? 19. met somebody who changed you: i don’t think so 20. find out who your true friends are: what is a “true” friend 21. kissed somebody on your Facebook list: yeah im facebook friends with my boyfriend so HOW MANY/MUCH: 22. facebook friends do you have in real life: all of my facebook friends are people i know irl, slightly fewer of them are people i’m actively friends with  23. pets: two cats

24. want to change name: already did 

25. did i get for my last birthday: idk i got some cool shit like a polaroid camera and some records 26. time i woke up: ugh like 6:50 b/c school day 27. doing at midnight: sleeping 28. something you cannot wait for: probably the rocket club trip to alabama in... less than a month 29. last time i saw my mum: approximately 30 seconds ago 30. something you wish you could change about your life: uh, be a cis guy, not have fucked up so many friendships/relationships 31. listening to right now: nothing 32. something that gets on your nerves: idk lots of things, my brother being an ass 33. talked to a person named Tom: i have no idea 34. most visited website: tungle.hell 35. elementary school: what is this question asking  36. high school: cant wait to get out 37. college: god the dream college would be caltech or mit but i probably wont get in so... :/ 38. hair colour: brown 39. long or short hair: i like having short hair bc i’m not masculine enough to have long hair and be secure in my body image but both are attractive on other ppl 40. crush: @a-wandering-intern 41. what do you like about yourself: i’m smart? also my face looks pretty decent from some angles 42. piercings: none but i have seriously considered getting a facial piercing 43. blood type: not a clue 44. nickname: the name i use is danny which is technically a nickname, also occasionally people call me danny boy which i Really Like, and sometimes people call me dan which is.... not great 45. relationship status: dating @a-wandering-intern 46. zodiac: capricorn 47. pronouns: he/him 48. favourite show: what is... a tv? jk probably stranger things because it’s one of the few shows i’ve seen recently and it was really good 49. tattoos: none but i want one of the greek letter delta 50. right or left handed: right FIRST: 51. surgery: um i got my tonsils out when i was little 52. piercing: none 53. best friend: uh... i had a best friend named sophia in like, kindergarten, but i don’t think i was her best friend :( 54. sport: god sports have never really been my thing but i did basketball for like one season in either 4th or 5th grade, god knows why 55. vacation: i dunno but i remember having gone to japan when i was really little, i don’t remember anything about it just that i went 56. pair of shoes: lmao what

RIGHT NOW:

57. eating: nothing

58. drinking: nothing

59. im about to: send some shitty photoshopped pictures to a friend and then study physics

60. listening to: my own keyboard (wait wasn’t this question earlier on this meme)

61. waiting for: i dunno

62. want to see: not really sure

63. want to get married: for the longest time i didn’t or at least i professed not to, but after some consideration i think that i do actually want to get married to someone i love and even if it’s not something i want super badly i wouldn’t mind having a kid as long as they were adopted

64. career: i want to be a physicist but am currently a depressed student

WHICH IS BETTER:

65. hugs/kisses: uh i like kissing but hugging is just so emotionally comforting and grounding so i think i’m gonna have to go with hugging

66. lips/eyes: i feel like this is comparing apples to oranges. i would rather have both lips and eyes

67. shorter/taller: is this question about which is more attractive to me because either one, but i like it when people are my height/shorter because i am insecure about the fact that i am personally short

68. younger/older: in terms of which it’s better to be, both have their pros and cons, but i would rather be younger than like, really old. in terms of dating, i wouldn’t date someone more than a year older or a year younger than me so idk really

69. romantic/spontaneous: i honestly don’t even know what this means

70. nice arms/nice stomach: what exactly do you mean by ‘nice’ and again this is like comparing to apples and oranges. both are separately very nice

71. sensitive/loud: i dunno, either?

72. hook up/relationship: relationship absolutely i dont think i could trust a stranger or even a not-very-close friend enough to hook up with them

73. troublemaker/hesitant: i am extremely afraid of doing things wrong or getting in trouble

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. kissed a stranger: no

75. drank hard liquor: ok so one time i had some sort of cream liquor (liqueur?) i can’t remember what it actually was and idk if it counts. also it was like literally half a sip that one of my parents gave me at a family gathering

76. lost glasses/contact lenses: one time i literally dropped my glasses in a lake and had to get new ones. now i wear daily disposable contacts so i’ve never, like, lost them, but i have had them fall out and couldn’t get them back in

77. turned someone down: i dont think so...?

78. canoodling on first date: is this a euphemism for sex because if so then no

79. broken someones heart: i mean i don’t like that term at all but yeah i’ve hurt someone i was dating and i still regret it

80. had your own heart broken: yeah, it’s complicated

81: been arrested: nope

82: cried when someone died: like, almost

83: fallen for a friend: real question is who have i ever fallen for who wasn’t already a friend

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84. yourself: sometimes

85. miracles: ~a post-war economic miracle~ haha jk but actually... not supernatural miracles

86. love at first sight: no i think you kinda have to get to know someone to really love them

87. Santa Clause: i mean.... LOOK AWAY NOW IF YOU BELIEVE IN SANTA CLAUS he’s ur parents so i don’t believe in some dude that lives at the north pole and breaks into ur house but i do believe in the concept and i think it’s really cute

88. kiss on first date: depends on the way the stars are aligned

89. angels: nope

OTHER:

90. current best friends name: eleanor and ceci (also cyrus if u count my boyfriend as one of my best friends, which i generally do)

91. eye colour: blue

92. favourite movie/s: repo man, which is a shitty movie from the 80s. god it’s so bad i love it

ok im not gonna tag anyone because i’m too lazy but if u feel like doing it go ahead

[mynameisnotkarl-blog1]

1/2

I see people are coming to me about assumptions lately

Things im hearing seeing would make you think these dudes hate me

its 50/50 so i guess they can split that evenly

Going outside is feeling more like a chore now

thoughts im having would make you think i gone senile

i been so self aware that its hard to be me now

so selfish i don’t even pretend to be me now

THIS SHIT CORNY 🌽🤣😂🤣😈

but this what the pression sounds like on a good day

and i know this shit can get worse like anyday

i know im selfish i didn’t even show up

Im feeling whoozy i think im bout to throw up

running from my problems like dont ask me

i don’t believe that l#%$ is real if you ask me

feelings going in remission

i missed it with it precision

i just couldn’t risk it

(Ive been in that void)(pitched down)

Ive been out that void

and i still cant tell difference

like who making these decisions

I got some good news

you can’t fit these shoes

i got some bad news

i can’t get over ...

it’s been a few years

ok maybe a couple fews

i mean couples views

i wish weren’t different

and the thought of it yeah it really hits

i hit the doc for a script

you don’t know it but you are god-sent

maybe that was a little extra

why do i be so extra

and then i thought about it but i really didn’t think about it lol

Aint nobody going to judge me harder than i do me

last years of high school got me feeling like a zombie

last years of colle got me feeling like i want to harm me

yeah i know i don’t fit in

but this trigger just clicking

“well did you check the safety”

oh yeah that’s my conscious

i say we get along

he barely do me wrong

when i step like iverson

broad day victim going missing the public

don’t go outside cause a niggas mind is sick

oh you getting closer yeah i think i got to dip

oh im getting so sober yeah think it’s time to sip

and when the reason is no reason at all

When i see heaven i just want to ...

But its bugged when you on the other side

or in between

thinking back on it yeah i wasted my teens

opana had my lov i should of got therapy

i had these tears all froze in my face

i had these feelings all put away

this shit lame and wack

you need to grow up👿👺

Maybe you can turn this shit all around

you didn’t mind being the clown

Thinking their laughter is more important than the pain that you’re feeling now

Goal #1 look in the mirror more

#2 try more

yeah wish it was that simple

but simple how im feeling lately

looking in the mirror thinking why that guy hates me

hate i know it can be a strong word

so excuse me for my ignorance

I seem to lack for a better word or world

and it all seems the same

like how every song sounds sad and it’s starting to become lame

imagine putting your all into a track just for anthony to call your shit lame🤣😂🤣 i guess you got to start somewhere

i got so bored i was going to put %£$ name in the google search bar and face my worst nightmares and see if i can handle it or not

ive made myself an object of a pointless concept

no strong purpose

i think it’s funny how their is always someone who will take the news of your death with laughter and it will be a genuine laugh

told my $&@#%£* marriage is a cool concept n all but really dude

btw im the last person you should be taking advice from

compliment

read n tak a hint

ask &@$ if &@$ wants to get use to just touching each other

is this a relationship

can it be this simple

No

sometimes i realize how sad i am

and how pathetic i look and sound

do people get mad at you when you’re this pathetic

am i pushing it if i say im average

i wonder if my ancestors went through something like this

i feel like the future can be bright but no time is better than it is now

i wonder if $@&#%€ thinks about me

i wonder if i made anyone cry

i used to think about 9/11 daily

but then $&@ came along then

it was $&@ every other second

the adderall help but the isolation did not

i think about how i thrived in my world

but in your world i could not

i once thought about how i could just be being dramatic

like how im concerned if “just be being dramatic” is grammatically correct or incorrect or if i should just know that either way it’s not the first time nor the last (even this is a edit)

first time I seen the &@“$& i was scared to death

the second time i seen the &@“$& i was at peace

ive🔒 a note with all my thoughts and now i dont know my thoughts

you ever get so conscious of your walking you feel like every step you can trip

i want to make a song named “I stay strapped in Prague”

i found my 👇

thoughts

1. they was close now they talk behind my back

2. are they friends or are they just using me

3. most of the whispers are about me

4. why do i want people to like me

5. i see dark objects that are not there

6. the majority of people i meet are against me

7. i know that i exaggerate things but does it stray away from the truth

8. i thought they was close but i got to cut ties now

9. i can absorb the outside world but it is difficult to interact

10. they can see right through me

11. they try to hurt me for a reaction

12. i cry most of the time just because it is good for me

13. they request things of me i don't want to do

14. isolated is when i feel most comfortable

15. i distance myself to protect me and sometimes others

16. i think im selfish even when im not trying to be

17. people think i don't like them but i don't have the energy for them

18. sometimes i avoid looking in the mirror

19. eye contact is becoming more and more difficult

20. most of my expressions are manufactured

21. don't care for the future don't got any plans

22. i love my family i love my family

23. i think about disappearing never coming back

24. ideal death will be alone deep in the forest

25. im scared

26. i damaged myself far past the chance of repair

27. distance distance distance

28. dissociation is easy

29. i don't know my family

30. why am i holding on to this anger

31. i might be sick

32. i don't know if i care

33. i think im pathetic for doing drugs

34. its hard to remember my childhood

35. i wonder if eight or ten year old me will like me now

36. accomplishments feel anything but

37. i notice things

38. im done with a lot people even ones i like

39. my thoughts paralyzes me

40. trust is difficult don't trust

41. don't know what my thoughts on what &&&& is yet

42. i don't want to do this how do i get out

43. i need help

44. i don't want help

45. enemies will laugh and joke in your face

46. if i try to enlist in the military they will deny me

47. i cant tell nobody about the problems i got nobody

48. i don't know where im at right now i just hope he is alright

49. j coles kod got me thinking he the goat and i only listen to the intro

50. ?i deleted this one it was too dark?🙄😢🙇🏾🤦🏾‍♂️

51. the album-art cover of the kod is amazing. subliminal

52. kill edward is jcole

53. if this is it im not

54. itiiinimpressed

55. im going to stop thinking about her

56. regret is a persons worst enemy

57. pretty sure i got an anxiety disorder

58. pretty sure i got ptsd

59. i use to skip meals because of my anxiety

60. i don't need nobody to tell me i need help but i know

61. im sick

62. im sick

63. how did i get sick

64. im a little dramatic

65. tpye mistake but i didn't want to backspace

66. thought this line should be a dark one but nah 6ix hundred more to go (ಥ﹏ಥ) that was an accident too but it still works i guess

67. fiona and v that will be a good 3hree

68. believe im capable of love but choose not to

69. i don't want to get high anymore but i am

70. i find myself in that empty place quite often

71. i dismissed all her advances im sorry

72. this is going to be... a long one

73. im not good with eye contact for a lot of reasons but i seen something in someone's eyes thinking how is s•• alone? is s•• alone? and things were never the same it changed everything it happened too fast but feelings weren't mutual and now i feel numb most of the time

74. i suck at rapping and producing but it feels like i can change that so easily but im lazy and scared mostly scared lol

75. i hate that shit "lol" but i still do it smh devon no lol

76. sorry its just most of the time ur not

77. im too busy trying to love myself

78. oh im sorry if it looks like im trying too hard but i am

79. i would do anything to push people alway but very little to keep them

80. everyone is against me i got few if not any

81. i need to get swollen i already told some people i was planning on too

82. i only laugh with my friends i think

83. hope this car ain't no scam hope is empty but it feels good

84. i just want it to feel good

85. i think ye might have lost it

86. i have problems sleeping

87. i slipped in that dark place again and i don't want to be there

88. behind my back

89. thunder without lightning how frightening

90. it's either i care too much or for not

91. i really don't want to disagree

92. Cringe

93. how do u make demons out of angels

94. if i hit the lottery with millions i promise myself to show someone this list

95. who are you?

96. i don't want to think about it when i think about it

97. you don't want to know the places i go

98. had to correct that👆👍

99. just sitting here chilling with my shoes on unlaced

100. i think im sick... in the head

101. i think about the most darkest things

102. i don't think im going to sleep for a long time

103. now i know why people go to far with things

104. but when you do it right the outcome is amazing

105. i can understand someone else's choice better than i can explain min

[internetdetectives]

8/31/19 - Chat with Moonman and GHOSTBABEL

moonman31 12:04 PM: ((A screenshot of a news article reporting that hurricane Helena is no longer headed towards Moonman’s location is posted))

moonman31 12:04 PM: "damn y'all”

Slinky stinks 12:05 PM: "is that good or bad”

moonman31 12:05 PM: "it moved away”

Jos 12:05 PM: "Yes,”

Slinky stinks 12:05 PM: "dont tell me the goddamn ritual worked on the AO timeline too lol”

moonman31 12:05 PM: "what”

Slinky stinks 12:06 PM: "its kinda hard to explain without breaking the 4th wall a little so lets leave it there”

moonman31 12:06 PM: "Y'all fuckin with magic again huh”

Jos 12:06 PM: "

we did a little ritual to the "sun", the counter of luna, as a joke to move the huricane away, and it worked? lol”

Jos 12:06 PM: "Just kidding”

Jos 12:06 PM: "how it is going”

moonman31 12:07 PM: "I mean good now that I won't get eaten by a giant storm”

Slinky stinks 12:07 PM: "yeah are you good n stuff”

Slinky stinks 12:07 PM: “well, thats nice to hear i guess”

Jos 12:07 PM: "that might be the fetish of someone outthere on the internet”

Slinky stinks 12:08 PM: "rule 34 my friend”

Slinky stinks 12:08 PM: "huricane rule 34”

Slinky stinks 12:08 PM: "imagine that actually exists”

Jos 12:08 PM: "well, seems like AO is pretty chill rn”

Jos 12:08 PM: "and jid is the same”

Slinky stinks 12:09 PM: "and the elegy didnt do that much of a thing apart of making moony see that thing (sorry again)”

ARGdov 12:09 PM: "tl;dr a friend of ours performed a ritual as a joke to redirect the hurricane”

ARGdov 12:09 PM: "Well”

ARGdov 12:09 PM: "I dunno if he was joking, he got a few other friends to do it too”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "oh rigth”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "we also did it”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "so it kinda counts”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:10 PM: "sᴏ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴀs ɪᴛ ᴛʜᴇɴ, ᴛʜᴇ sᴜɴ's sᴏɴɢ?”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "nope”

Jos 12:10 PM: "Helios song*”

Jos 12:10 PM: "but with images”

Jos 12:10 PM: "lol”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "we invoked helios with something”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "yeah lol”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "imagine now we can use gods aswell lmao”

Slinky stinks 12:10 PM: "that would be rad ngl”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:11 PM: "sᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘʟᴀʏᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴇ sᴜɴ's sᴏɴɢ ᴍᴀɴᴜᴀʟʟʏ? ᴏʀ ᴛʜᴀᴛ's ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅɪᴅ, ᴇssᴇɴᴛɪᴀʟʟʏ. ᴠᴇʀʏ ᴘʀɪᴍɪᴛɪᴠɪsᴛ ᴏꜰ ʏᴏᴜ.”

Slinky stinks 12:11 PM: "no, we didnt play any songs”

Slinky stinks 12:11 PM: "a friend did a kinda ritual and told us to draw a image so it would make more effect”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:12 PM: "ʏᴏᴜ ᴍɪss ᴍʏ ᴘᴏɪɴᴛ. ᴇɪᴛʜᴇʀ ᴡᴀʏ ᴡᴇ'ʀᴇ ᴀꜰꜰᴇᴄᴛɪɴɢ ᴇᴀᴄʜ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜᴏsᴇ sᴏʀᴛs ᴏꜰ ᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴs sᴏ ᴛᴏ sᴘᴇᴀᴋ.”

Slinky stinks 12:12 PM: "oh”

Slinky stinks 12:12 PM: "i dont know how to read sorry”

Jos 12:12 PM: "pff, songs are for casuals, manual is better…”

Jos 12:12 PM: "yeah”

moonman31 12:13 PM: "fuckin casuals”

moonman31 12:13 PM: "git gud like my ID boys”

Slinky stinks 12:13 PM: "songs are for normies reeeeeeeee”

Slinky stinks 12:13 PM: "so aprantly now if we do a ritual it may also work? or wtf does this mean lol”

Jos 12:14 PM: "The song of time fucked up AO on oyur time, the magic can also move the storm on your universe so we can affect stuff from here”

Jos 12:14 PM: "the thing is why, maybe because tyler is there?”

Jos 12:14 PM: "he is there and therefore that universe was affected”

Jos 12:14 PM: "as this universe was affected when he used to be in this one”

Slinky stinks 12:14 PM: "oh rigth”

Slinky stinks 12:14 PM: "bc he is our link”

Slinky stinks 12:14 PM: "ok it makes sense”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:15 PM: "ᴍᴀᴋᴇs ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴏɴᴅᴇʀ, ᴡʜᴏ ɪs ᴏᴜʀ ʟɪɴᴋ? ᴀʀᴇ ᴡᴇ ᴀʟʟ ʟɪɴᴋ?”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:15 PM: "ɪ ᴄᴀɴ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴊᴏᴋᴇs.”

Jos 12:16 PM: "probably your tyler”

moonman31 12:16 PM: "oof”

Slinky stinks 12:16 PM: "lol”

Jos 12:16 PM: "from your universe, or someone else”

moonman31 12:16 PM: "that's some deeplore humor”

Jos 12:16 PM: "Hiiija!”

Jos 12:16 PM: "pot break sounds”

Slinky stinks 12:16 PM: "GNHA!”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:17 PM: "ɪ ʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴛʜɪɴɢs ᴏɴ ᴛʜᴇ ɪɴᴛᴇʀɴᴇᴛ.”

moonman31 12:17 PM: "can't really blame you lol”

moonman31 12:17 PM: "ok so”

moonman31 12:17 PM: "that is gud but”

moonman31 12:17 PM: "we are still kind of in a stalemate”

moonman31 12:17 PM: "plus now we have some new spooks about apparently so”

otherLiam 12:18 PM: "That’s true. Right now we’re sort of waiting on GB to get us into the subspace.”

Jos 12:18 PM: "I still wonder who is the AO with the alien mask”

otherLiam 12:18 PM: "As usual, we’re all dependent on his skills.”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:18 PM: "ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ, ɪ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴇxᴀᴄᴛʟʏ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴡ.”

Slinky stinks 12:18 PM: "yup”

otherLiam 12:19 PM: "Oh, awesome. Do you know how long it’ll take?”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:19 PM: "ᴡᴇ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴏɴᴇ sᴍᴀʟʟ ᴘʀᴏʙʟᴇᴍ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ɪ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴇᴀʟ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʙᴇꜰᴏʀᴇ ᴡᴇ ᴄᴀɴ ᴛʀᴜʟʏ ᴘʀᴏᴄᴇᴇᴅ.”

Slinky stinks 12:19 PM: "what problem…”

Jos 12:20 PM: "enemy eyes?”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:20 PM: "ɪ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ɪᴛ ʙᴇsᴛ ɴᴏᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴛᴇʟʟ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀs ᴏꜰ ɴᴏᴡ ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ɪ'ᴍ sᴜʀᴇ ɪᴛ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ᴀ ᴘᴀɴɪᴄ, ʙᴜᴛ ɪ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ʀᴇᴀsᴏɴ ᴛᴏ ᴡᴏʀʀʏ ᴀs ᴏꜰ ɴᴏᴡ.”

Slinky stinks 12:20 PM: "you lost the hat?”

otherLiam 12:20 PM: "well that’s unsettling”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:20 PM: "ɴᴏ.”

Slinky stinks 12:20 PM: "okay…”

otherLiam 12:20 PM: "but alright, handle your business. let us know if we can do anything to help.”

Slinky stinks 12:21 PM: "yup”

Slinky stinks 12:21 PM: “tho if its a very big problem you should tell us so we can solve it”

otherLiam 12:21 PM: "Is there anything we can do to prevent Nocta from doing whatever he did to Moonman to other people?”

Jos 12:22 PM: "I think the problem is telling us”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:22 PM: "ɪ ꜰᴇᴇʟ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛʜɪs ɪs ɴᴏᴛ ᴀ ᴘʀᴏᴍɪsɪɴɢ ɴᴏᴛᴇ ᴛᴏ ʟᴇᴀᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴏɴ. ʙᴜᴛ ɪ ᴄᴀɴ ᴀssᴜʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴛɪɴᴜᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴏᴠᴇ ꜰᴏʀᴡᴀʀᴅ. ɪɴ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴇɴᴅ ɪ ᴡɪʟʟ ᴛʀᴜsᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ɪɴᴅɪᴠɪᴅᴜᴀʟ ᴏᴜʀ ꜰɪɴᴀʟ ᴍᴏᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ ɢᴀɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ɢʀᴏᴜᴘ's ᴛʀᴜsᴛ ʙᴜᴛ ɪᴛ ɪꜰ ɪᴛ ɪs sʜᴀʀᴇᴅ ɪ'ᴍ ᴀꜰʀᴀɪᴅ ᴀ ʀᴏɢᴜᴇ ᴡɪʟʟ ᴘᴜʟʟ ᴀɴ ɪɴᴛᴇʀɴᴇᴛ ᴅᴇᴛᴇᴄᴛɪᴠᴇ ꜰᴀᴍᴏᴜs sᴛᴜɴᴛ.”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:22 PM: "ɪ'ᴍ ɴᴏᴛ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ᴀᴛ ᴅᴇᴄɪᴅɪɴɢ sᴏ ɪ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜ sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴄʜᴏᴏsᴇ.”

moonman31 12:24 PM: "lol”

moonman31 12:24 PM: "idk feels like a troll to me”

moonman31 12:24 PM: "i mean at least as far as making yall choose”

Slinky stinks 12:25 PM: "ummm”

Slinky stinks 12:25 PM: "who tho”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:25 PM: "ᴀɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴛᴀʙ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴏꜰ ᴘᴏʀɴʜᴜʙ ᴡʜɪʟᴇ ɪ'ᴍ ᴏɴ.”

otherLiam 12:25 PM: "Nah, it makes sense. I’d be worried about us doing a headass move too.”

Mr t series good 12:25 PM: "im not even on pornhub rn”

Slinky stinks 12:25 PM: "ay i closed the tab 15 mins ago”

Slinky stinks 12:25 PM: "dont @ me”

moonman31 12:26 PM: "i was about to say”

moonman31 12:26 PM: "i don't think he was talking to me”

otherLiam 12:29 PM: "give thr info to Jos.”

Jos 12:29 PM: "o/”

otherLiam 12:29 PM: "we voted”

moonman31 12:29 PM: ":open_mouth:”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:29 PM: "ᴀʟʀɪɢʜᴛ ᴛʜᴇɴ.”

Slinky stinks 12:30 PM: "\o/”

Mr t series good 12:30 PM: “ok”

ɢʜᴏsᴛʙᴀʙᴇʟ 12:32 PM: "ɪᴛ ɪs ᴅᴏɴᴇ. ɪ ʜᴏᴘᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡɪʟʟ ᴋᴇᴇᴘ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘʀᴏᴍɪsᴇs.”

Slinky stinks 12:32 PM: "neat”

Jos 12:32 PM: "I know nothing tbh”

otherLiam 12:33 PM: "aight neat.”

moonman31 12:34 PM: "i don't really know what's going on tbh”

Slinky stinks 12:34 PM: "me neither”

Xenquility 12:34 PM: "No one has know what's been going on for the past four years”

Jos 12:34 PM: "I wish i knew”

Slinky stinks 12:34 PM: "well moonman how is that hurricane crisis going”

moonman31 12:34 PM: "same”

otherLiam 12:34 PM: "GB is being paranoid about our stupidity, that’s all.”

Slinky stinks 12:35 PM: "i think he should be”

otherLiam 12:35 PM: "Rightly so, yeah.”

Slinky stinks 12:35 PM: "lol”

Slinky stinks 12:35 PM: "well, any news about my fuck up?”

otherLiam 12:36 PM: "What do you mean? Like, “has anyone seen Tenebris lately”?”

Slinky stinks 12:36 PM: "yup”

moonman31 12:36 PM: ((A meme mocking the player Slinky is posted))

Slinky stinks 12:36 PM: "just that”

Slinky stinks 12:36 PM: “honestly, AO memes are better”

otherLiam 12:37 PM: "damn that’s cold”

otherLiam 12:37 PM: "and im not sure we’ll know the full extent of how bad you fucked up for a while.”

Slinky stinks 12:37 PM: "im gonna pull out the Alpha version of that meme”

moonman31 12:38 PM: "what”

Slinky stinks 12:38 PM: ((A meme mocking the player Slinky is posted))

moonman31 12:38 PM: "damn”

Xenquility 12:38 PM: "oh hey what a cool and original meme”

moonman31 12:38 PM: "tom and jerry is classic tho”

Slinky stinks 12:38 PM: "yeah tom and jerry is the best”

Xenquility 12:39 PM: "whoever made that must be extremely sexy”

Jos 12:39 PM: "ᛨᛆᛘᚾ”

Slinky stinks 12:39 PM: "jos with his runes s freaking me out”

Jos 12:39 PM: "ᛋᛚᛁᚾᚴᛦ᛫ ᛒᚮᚮᚮᚮ”

moonman31 12:39 PM: "damn cold xen”

moonman31 12:39 PM: "i saw that shit”

(...)

Xenquility 5:24 PM: "I'm still of the opinion none of that spellcasting stuff was canon”

ADULT_LINK 5:24 PM: "it does that”

Xenquility 5:24 PM: "I know what it does in the actual game”

Slinky stinks 5:24 PM: "wait is the MOON on ooc?”

ARGdov 5:25 PM: "You guys should probably be talking about this in ID”

Slinky stinks 5:25 PM: "or is it a normal moon”

Slinky stinks 5:25 PM: "yeah thats what i said”

mfgreth 10:31 PM: ((Greth posts a “thinking” emoji))

moonman31 10:34 PM: ((Moonman posts a “thinking” emoji))

moonman31 10:34 PM: wait”

moonman31 10:34 PM: mindfuck”

Slinky stinks 10:35 PM: "lol”

moonman31 10:35 PM: "is that actually greth”

mfgreth 10:35 PM: ")()()()(“

Slinky stinks 10:36 PM: "i guess he is”

moonman31 10:36 PM: "i thought you were evil”

Slinky stinks 10:36 PM: "wait”

mfgreth 10:36 PM: "i thought you were dead”

ADULT_LINK 10:36 PM: "why would greth be evil”

moonman31 10:36 PM: "i thought you guys said he turned evil”

Slinky stinks 10:36 PM: "mindfuck”

ADULT_LINK 10:36 PM: "i think that was some time shenannigan fuckyness?”

ADULT_LINK 10:36 PM: "¯\_(ツ)_/¯”

mfgreth 10:37 PM: ":okretard:”

moonman31 10:37 PM: "i actually never noticed him being here”

moonman31 10:37 PM: "isn't that like inherently a bad idea”

moonman31 10:37 PM: "it also fucks with me on so many levels”

Slinky stinks 10:37 PM: "this is a mindfuck lvl 600”

Wolfcat 10:38 PM: ":munky:”

Wolfcat 10:38 PM: “me rn”

Slinky stinks 10:38 PM: "UH OH”

ARGdov 10:38 PM: "Wait what”

mfgreth 10:38 PM: "awa”

moonman31 10:38 PM: "i mean but seriously”

ARGdov 10:38 PM: "Last we checked Greth had been posessed by Patrem”

Slinky stinks 10:38 PM: "yeah moony”

ARGdov 10:38 PM: "And he was travelling paralelos”

Slinky stinks 10:38 PM: "i feel you”

Slinky stinks 10:38 PM: "yeah”

Slinky stinks 10:38 PM: "this is ooc greth i think”

ARGdov 10:39 PM: "Although he may not know hes being controlled?”

Slinky stinks 10:39 PM: "its a big mindfuck”

mfgreth 10:39 PM: "big brain time”

moonman31 10:39 PM: "i want to meme but i'm freaked out”

ARGdov 10:39 PM: "This is weirdo”

mfgreth 10:40 PM: "perhaps you should all aggregate your thoughts”

Slinky stinks 10:40 PM: "moony this is more confusing to us”

moonman31 10:40 PM: "kasjf”

moonman31 10:40 PM: "what”

ARGdov 10:40 PM: "Perhaps we should”

ARGdov 10:40 PM: "I guess”

Wolfcat 10:40 PM: "very wyrd”

ARGdov 10:40 PM: "What does it mean”

Slinky stinks 10:40 PM: "Aggregation”

Slinky stinks 10:40 PM: "AGAIN”

ARGdov 10:40 PM: "@mfgreth who are you?”

mfgreth 10:40 PM: "I'm Greth, what?”

ARGdov 10:41 PM: "Are you “our” greth”

Wolfcat 10:41 PM: "are you ok arg”

ARGdov 10:41 PM: "Yes”

Slinky stinks 10:41 PM: "yes he is greth”

mfgreth 10:41 PM: "sometimes I wonder that”

Slinky stinks 10:41 PM: "but WICH greth”

mfgreth 10:41 PM: "I mean am I your Greth?”

mfgreth 10:41 PM: "or is your greth here now”

moonman31 10:41 PM: "you mean me fuck off with that”

ARGdov 10:41 PM: "Moonmans not from our timeline”

moonman31 10:41 PM: "yeah”

moonman31 10:41 PM: "you know what they meant”

ARGdov 10:42 PM: "So no hes not “our greth””

mfgreth 10:42 PM: "i said it was big brain time”

ADULT_LINK 10:42 PM: "im confused so”

ARGdov 10:42 PM: "I am wondering though”

ADULT_LINK 10:42 PM: "i'm gonna go back to playin diablo 3”

ARGdov 10:42 PM: "Ok guys”

Slinky stinks 10:42 PM: "Big brain time huh”

ARGdov 10:42 PM: "Remember when Tyler or whoever said things were about to get more complicated”

Slinky stinks 10:42 PM: "oh shit”

Slinky stinks 10:42 PM: "yeah”

mfgreth 10:42 PM: "ok you all are angry so let's have a candid conversation”

ARGdov 10:42 PM: "Thorin suggested a third timeline could be getting thrown into the mix”

ARGdov 10:42 PM: "Were not angry”

Slinky stinks 10:43 PM: "oh no”

ARGdov 10:43 PM: "Just confused?”

Slinky stinks 10:43 PM: "oh yeah”

ARGdov 10:43 PM: "Is “greth” ok?”

mfgreth 10:43 PM: "I am better than ever”

ARGdov 10:43 PM: "Do you remember the vlogs?”

mfgreth 10:43 PM: "yeah because I shot them”

ARGdov 10:43 PM: "The vlogs you made”

ARGdov 10:43 PM: "Ok”

Jos 10:43 PM: "Whats going on?”

ARGdov 10:43 PM: "Hmm”

ARGdov 10:43 PM: "Greth is talking”

Jos 10:44 PM: "Resume”

ARGdov 10:44 PM: "Its confusing”

mfgreth 10:44 PM: "honestly”

mfgreth 10:44 PM: "Everything is great.”

ARGdov 10:44 PM: "Theres that phrase again”

Jos 10:44 PM: "Wait if moonman os beta Greth”

moonman31 10:44 PM: "this stepford motherfucker”

ARGdov 10:44 PM: "Could mean something or nothing”

ADULT_LINK 10:44 PM: "wait hold up”

ADULT_LINK 10:44 PM: "i didnt suggets a third timeline”

Jos 10:44 PM: "Nocta?”

ARGdov 10:44 PM: "@mfgreth are you still in the timeline you originated from?”

ADULT_LINK 10:44 PM: "i said it'd be fucked if there was a third”

ADULT_LINK 10:44 PM: "nothing indicates that there is”

ARGdov 10:45 PM: "Same-same, really”

ARGdov 10:45 PM: "I mean”

ADULT_LINK 10:45 PM: "ehh”

ARGdov 10:45 PM: "Im just trying to figure this out”

mfgreth 10:45 PM: "timelines are pointless imo at this point but yeah”

ARGdov 10:45 PM: "Who this is”

mfgreth 10:45 PM: "I am Greth PRIME”

ADULT_LINK 10:45 PM: "its greth you dingdong”

mfgreth 10:45 PM: "or whatever”

ADULT_LINK 10:45 PM: ":P”

Jos 10:45 PM: "Aka nocta?”

ARGdov 10:45 PM: "So Im guessing hes our greth”

Slinky stinks 10:45 PM: "greth dont meme pls”

Slinky stinks 10:45 PM: "but if he is our greth”

ARGdov 10:45 PM: "Who probably has Patrem in there”

Slinky stinks 10:45 PM: "why is he no patt”

Slinky stinks 10:45 PM: "exactly”

ARGdov 10:46 PM: "Just lurking in the background”

ARGdov 10:46 PM: "Because patrem doesnt need to posess someoen full time”

Slinky stinks 10:46 PM: "just when he is asleep i guess”

ARGdov 10:46 PM: "He can just stick around in there head and when he takes over they blackout”

Slinky stinks 10:46 PM: "hmm”

Slinky stinks 10:46 PM: "still confusing af”

ARGdov 10:47 PM: "Not really but ok”

ARGdov 10:47 PM: "Think of it as Jekyll and Hydr”

Jos 10:47 PM: "Oue greth might be nocta”

ARGdov 10:47 PM: "*Hyde”

Jos 10:47 PM: "Be cautious.”

ARGdov 10:47 PM: "Wait what”

ARGdov 10:47 PM: "No nocta is Kevin”

Jos 10:47 PM: "If moonman os greth beta”

Jos 10:47 PM: "And greth vlogs got possesed by patrem?”

moonman31 10:48 PM: ":moony: :gun:”

moonman31 10:48 PM: “tbh”

ARGdov 10:48 PM: "God fuck I dont know”

ARGdov 10:48 PM: "This is bizarre”

ARGdov 10:48 PM: "I gotta go for a bit”

Wolfcat 10:48 PM: ":truth: :moony: :truth:”

mfgreth 10:48 PM: ((An image titled “meta.gif” is posted))

ARGdov 10:48 PM: "Aaaah”

ARGdov 10:48 PM: "Ill be back in a bit”

Jos 10:48 PM: "Well fuck”

Slinky stinks 10:48 PM: "oh KAY”

Jos 10:49 PM: "Moonman, send product please”

Jos 10:49 PM: "We need to evade ourselves from this chaos”

moonman31 10:49 PM: "oh ok”

Slinky stinks 10:49 PM: "moonman send your dealer”

moonman31 10:49 PM: ((Ascii art of marijuana is posted))

Jos 10:50 PM: "Perfect”

Slinky stinks 10:50 PM: "ah yes”

Jos 10:50 PM: ":cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud:”

Jos 10:50 PM: ":cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud: :cloud_lightning:”

Slinky stinks 10:50 PM: "D I G I T A L   W E E D”

Slinky stinks 10:50 PM: "hope babel does not get high”

Jos 10:50 PM: "Oh shit, so much smoke i made a ecosystem”

Slinky stinks 10:50 PM: "Josniverse”

Wolfcat 10:50 PM: ":wariowaggle:” 

Wolfcat 10:50 PM: “:cloud:”

Slinky stinks 10:51 PM: "ave you guys seen the gif greth sent”

Jos 10:51 PM: ((Jos reposts “meta.gif”))

Slinky stinks 10:51 PM: "he deleted it”

Slinky stinks 10:51 PM: "File name?”

Jos 10:51 PM: "Meta”

Slinky stinks 10:51 PM: "Of course”

Slinky stinks 10:51 PM: "this is kinda meta”

Jos 10:52 PM: "Ton”

Jos 10:52 PM: "Undertale confirmed”

Slinky stinks 10:52 PM: "na na NA NA”

Slinky stinks 10:52 PM: "you know the song”

Slinky stinks 10:52 PM: "okay, now talking about that gif”

Slinky stinks 10:52 PM: "you know what does it look like?”

Slinky stinks 10:52 PM: "just spitballing”

Jos 10:54 PM: "Probably”

Jos 10:54 PM: "Also offtopic:”

Jos 10:54 PM: "Who is more badass”

Jos 10:54 PM: "Scp foundation “

Jos 10:54 PM: "Or”

Jos 10:54 PM: "Windstorm ?”

moonman31 10:55 PM: "ok im out”

moonman31 10:55 PM: "my life has been weird enough lately”

moonman31 10:55 PM: "bbl”

Jos 10:55 PM: "Mm why?”

Slinky stinks 10:55 PM: "windstorm?”

Jos 10:55 PM: "Dont leave man”

Jos 10:55 PM: ":c”

moonman31 10:56 PM: "no im just logging off discord”

moonman31 10:56 PM: "sheesh”

Jos 10:56 PM: "Alright”

mfgreth 10:56 PM: "bye”

Jos 10:56 PM: "Be safe…”

Slinky stinks 10:56 PM: "take care g”

moonman31 10:56 PM: "FUCK OFF”

moonman31 10:56 PM: "not you guys other me ok”

moonman31 10:56 PM: "sayonara”

[dayumpeterpan]

1) Put your iTunes on shuffle. Give me the first 6 songs that pop up. Arabella - The Arctic Monkeys The City - The 1975 Ferrari - The Neighbourhood Cigarettes in the Theater - Two Door Cinema Club Postpone - Catfish and the Bottlemen Silvertongue - Young the Giant 2) If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? My soulmate, I suppose 3) Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17. "As newborn babies. We might, anyhow, be natural..." from No Exif 4) What do you think about most? I guess love 5) Ever had a poem or song written about you? No, I haven't 6) Do you have any strange phobias? Yes, I'm deathly afraid of needles like it's not just a fear it's a diagnosable phobia. 7) What's your religion? I'm agnostic. 8) If you are outside, what are you most likely doing? Walking I guess. I do a lot of different thinks outside. 9) Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band? Catfish and the Bottlemen, no question. 10) What was the last lie you told? I told my friend I had to miss rehearsal cause I was sick when really I needed to go to dance class cause my parents paid a lot of money for it. 11) Do you believe in karma? Not really. 12) What does your URL mean? Well, my crush dressed up as Peter Pan for Halloween one year so my friends and I started saying, "dayum Peter Pan" when we saw him... well mostly just me. But now it's just because I love Peter Pan. 13) What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength? My greatest weakness is either my vanity or my selfishness. I can be selfless and usually I am, but when I'm selfish I feel like shit. And I just have such an obsession with being pretty because I get such a sense of power from it. Not sure what my greatest strength is. I guess it's my mental/emotional strength. I really think that I handle most situations very intelligently. 14) Who is your celebrity crush? I really don't have one. 15) How do you vent your anger? I guess by yelling when it's really bad and when it's minor I just count to ten and let it go. 16) Do you have a collection of anything? I used to collect snow globes. Now I guess I collect Disney stuffed animals. 17) Are you happy with the person you've become? Generally, yes. I'm not perfect but I'm really happy with the way I handle situations. 18) What's a sound you hate; sound you love? I don't know off the top of my head what sounds I hate. I love lots of sounds so that's hard too. I really just don't know. 19) What's your biggest "what if"? I guess I don't have one. I'm not a "what if" kind of person. 20) Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens? I don't really believe in ghost, but I won't count them out. I definitely believe in aliens. This universe is way too big for us to be the only intelligent life around. 21) Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm. My wall and my blanket. 22) Smell the air. What do you smell? Ugh, I can't smell anything, my nose is stuffed. 23) What's the worst place you have ever been to? The doctors office or the hospital to get my blood drawn. 24) Most attractive singer/s of your opposite gender? Fucking Shawn mendes is hot as hell im sorry. Also there was his boy on the voice that was fine as fuck. 25) To you, what is the meaning of life? I believe that life has no predetermined meaning, you give it meaning yourself. For me it's to be as happy as I can be. 26) Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed? Not yet. 27) What was the last movie you saw? Sing Street... good as hell 28) What's the worst injury you've ever had? I've never had a serious injury. 29) Do you have any obsessions right now? No, I'm not an obsessive person. 30) Ever had a rumor spread about you? Not that I know of. 31) Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong? No. I don't usually trust them right away but if that act differently I will give them the benefit of the doubt. 32) What is your astrological sign? Scorpio. 33) What's the last thing you purchased? My dress for the dance. 34) Love or lust? Love, I'm not a super horny person. 35) In a relationship? No, I wish I was. 36) How many relationships have you had? Ha, none cause I'm a loser. 37) What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you? I'm just really smiley and light and laughy with them. 38) Where is your best friend? At home I think. 39) What were you doing last night at 12 AM? Sleeping. 40) Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend? I think so. 41) You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do? Save the fucking dog, I'm not a horrible person. 42) You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid? a) I'd tell some people so they have time to prepare because sudden deaths are horrible. But I wouldn't tell everyone. b) I'd spend it traveling with the people I love. c) Hell yeah, id be terrified. 43) What's a song that always makes you happy when you hear it? Right now, silvertongue. All the time? Sidewinder. 44) In your opinion, what makes a great relationship? Trust, mutual comfort and adoration, and an unreal amount of friendship. 45) How can I win your heart? Smile at me and be a kind person. I love people's smiles and I hate assholes. 46) Can insanity bring on more creativity? I don't know, I've never been insane. I'd imagine it's subjective. 47) What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far? My decision to be confident and not rest my feelings about myself on others judgements. Also, not settling. 48) What would you want to be written on your tombstone? She did it all. 49) Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word "heart." Being in love I guess. 50) Basic question; what's your favorite color/colors? Mostly white but I also love grey. 51) What is your current desktop picture? The mermaids from Peter Pan 52) If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be? I want to say Trump but then we be dealing with Pence. I'd need to do some serious research for this one. 53) What would be a question you'd be afraid to tell the truth on? Are you naturally pretty? 54) You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power? Shape-shifting. 55) You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again? When I was in Alabama and I was laying on the dock at night with the water reflecting the lights across the bay and everything seemed infinite and I felt at home. 56) You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? I don't know. I don't have one that stands out. 57) You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be? Probably Shawn mendes or that guy from the voice. Idfk. 58) You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go? Venice. No idea why I'm saying that but it feels right. 59) Ever been on a plane? Yeah, a long time ago. 60) Give me your top 5 hottest celebrities. I don't fucking know stop asking me this.