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it was just going to be a few warmup doodles but then she infected the rest of the page like the ever eternal and spreading spores. hod!!! hod. hod :)
#lobotomy corporation#lobcorp#hod#hod lobcorp#lobotomy corp spoilers#I GUESS i almost forgot i drew her box form#lobcorp spoilers#and michelle actually. ..#both very tiny. itty bitty. microscopic#other sephirah there too as normal. i cant have her alone. and Angelina as well on the top patting her#i have a hard time fully capturing her for some reason. in my mind. maybe its because is the disconnected period!!! mentally#she genuinely wishes to care and be kind yet theres a dissonance with what she does..? or how it ends up being taken or what she does to en#up bringing those actions into reality. she can be forceful? wanting to have employees attend therapy sessions and meetings for suppression#tactics. which i think is also something the safety team is incharge of iirc. so that means shes doing way more that what she needs to on#her job as a sephirah. just for the sake of employees#she really does care as shes one of the only to Directly attempt to change their circumstances and quality of life and health#sure chesed doesnt punish employees when they dont do their work assigned or stress them out with work#but he doesnt actively push to attempt to make changes to aid employees besides the research perks which is to the manager#yesod IS right next to her and does also genuinely care but when it comes to employees hes distant at best when it comes to them and the#way he tries to protect them is by enforcing rules but he doesnt really create or attempt to help them like hod does#yesod is sort of a passive? way of doing it. yes he doesn make a push to enforce said rules but he doesnt make new ones. just follows what#is already there in place. hod tries to make new ways and not just for the safety of people like how yesod's has them physically fine and#not letting them over a certain threshold of mental corruption but she tries to have a program to Directly Address such a thing#its born out of care but the genuine worry of being a good person and her naivety ends up having it do more harm than good#sure there may be some employees that actually like and find it useful but so many are just accepting to their fate of Dying to where#her care seems pointless. shes a sephirah and to them a literal metal box why would they go ahead and feel bad for what an 'ai' is feeling#as she is interrupting their free time in the company#which is rude. and shit. iirc the counseling is compulsory but people go because shes a sephirah and their superior. the thought was there#but again it comes off wrong and ends up not working because shes their superior in the end#EEK!!! yeah... hod. the hod. there is WAY more but i can't fit it all here and i already typed enough
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How can you write a business case study
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Between these four walls



pairing: lee felix x afab!reader
genre: thriller/sci-fi, smut, fluff
synopsis: lee felix is your 89% match. please proceed to the house assigned to you where your relationship will be subjected to various tests. if you manage to complete all objectives and get your match to 100% you may proceed to leave. sex is strictly prohibited. remember, they're always watching.
wc: 13.4k
warnings: desc. of drowning, illness, drugging, tripping (psychedelics/stimulants), mention of needles, paralysis, gutting a fish (yes that's a warning), some blood
nsfw warnings: fingering, handjob, unprotected sex, spanking, cumshot
a/n: felix always inspires me for these kinds of concepts. i hope you enjoy💜
~ divider by @anitalenia
~ masterlist
Lee Felix. 89% match. Congratulations!
You stared at the device in your hand, your heartbeat picking up speed. Finally. Finally you had someone you matched with. The last time you tried a similar, underdeveloped program like this, it only led you to more disappointment and heartbreak.
But, everyone you knew was raving about Cupid Corp. and how they found the love of their life after participating in their program. You asked questions, curious about why they stayed so long in the Cupid Corp. village, what they had to do to get their match to a 100, to walk out with them hand in hand.
Their faces would change from the happy expressions and shiny eyes into something dull, drained of color.
"We signed a document that prohibits us from revealing anything." they'd answer.
It all sounded so mysterious and a little alarming but you were so damn tired of being lonely and seeing all these people walking out of Cupid Corp. with big dumb smiles on their faces.
So, after doing some thinking, you applied.
It was a long process, to say the least. There were tests you had to take, all of them online. Starting with a psychological test, then an IQ test, then a personality test. It took them a month as they asked for everything, from your family disease history to your hopes and dreams for the future.
The more data they gathered, the more detailed your profile became. You even had a few online interviews with a woman named 'Cherry' whose face you couldn't see as she was wearing some sort of mask, only her cherry red lips were visible to you.
"We will take your data into consideration and calculate the best match. Thank you for applying at Cupid Corp. We hope you find your dream lover." the woman talked in a monotone voice.
You didn't wait for too long. Only four days later, you got a package from them, inside it a round device with a screen and one button. You pressed it and when it came to life you were greeted with your match. Just his name and the percentage.
With it, you got a document that stated the location of the village as well as your house number, 14B and a ton of rules, most of them prohibiting you from talking about the activities and 'tests' inside the village as well as a 'no cellphone' rule. You thought it was kind of weird, but you didn't want to back out now. Not when you had a match with such a high number.
It can't be so hard to get it up to 100, right?
You read through all the rules, coming up to the last one.
'You and your partner are not allowed to engage in sexual activites during your stay in the village. Kissing and physical touch is fine unless it is erotic or stimulating in that sort of way. After you sign this paper, you have agreed to all the rules above and are aware that you will be filmed and monitored 24/7.'
You gulped, some kind of unease washing over you as you stared at the document. The little cupid drawing that was the company's logo looked so sweet and innocent but it didn't help the churning of your stomach. Taking a deep breath in, you grabbed you pen and signed the paper.
There is no going back now.
As soon as you entered the village through the gate, it felt like you walked right into a fairytale. The houses were all pretty pastel colors with white picked fences and gardens full of all sorts of beautiful flowers. Everything looked perfect.
The only weird thing was that you didn't see another person anywhere as you walked. It was eerily quiet, only your footsteps were echoing on the pavement and the sounds of your suitcase being dragged behind you. The village was far away from the bustling city so you couldn't hear any sound for miles.
Then you saw it, 14B, a pretty pastel blue house and you smiled to yourself, it looked so cute and cozy. Your heart suddenly skipped a beat when you noticed someone standing outside by the fence.
It was a guy close to your age, and as soon as he noticed you coming towards him, a big smile spread on his face. He waved awkwardly and you waved back as you neared him, your heart hammering in your chest. When you got closer to him, your stomach did a little flip.
He is so beautiful!, you thought as you observed his smiling face, his warm chocolate eyes, his plump heart shaped lips and all the pretty freckles adorning his skin.
"I'm Felix. Nice to meet you." he said, pleasantly shocking you with his deep voice.
"Y/n. Nice to meet you too." you smiled, your face burning up. You hoped you didn't look like an awkward tomato in front of this beautiful man, who was your match! You were already swooning over him as he helped you get your suitcase inside, dragging both of your luggage together while you looked around the garden.
"I guess this is our house." he said as the two of you walked in. You noticed right away that it was decorated in the way you wanted to decorate your dream house, a question you had to answer in one of the tests they gave you. You also noticed some knick knacks you didn't recognize, they were probably something Felix wanted to have in his house.
"They really went all out with the decorations." you said as the two of you made your way to the kitchen and Felix chuckled.
"They did." he nodded, the air between you a little awkward.
"Oh. What's this?" you noticed an envelope adressed to the both of you on the kitchen table.
You picked it up and opened it as Felix peered over your shoulder.
"Dear Felix and Y/n. Welcome to our Village of Love! We hope you enjoy your stay, no matter how short or long it is. You'll find everything you need inside your house, we hope you find it cozy and that you settle in well. Take your time to get used to your surroundings and learn a little about each other before you move onto the next phase. Tests will begin shortly. Have fun!" you read out loud before looking up and seeing a camera staring right at you, the red dot blinking.
"Tests, huh? Doesn't sound too fun." Felix said and you nodded.
"No, it doesn't." you shook your head. "Do you know anything about what happens here?"
"I have no idea. I asked a few of my friends and no one would tell me."
"Isn't that kind of suspicious?" you asked and Felix chuckled nervously, looking up at the camera.
"Aren't they like listening to us right now?" he whispered.
"I'm sure everyone who came here wondered about the program." you shrugged.
"I guess we will find out." Felix said, still being somewhat quiet as he kept eyeing the camera.
You walked over to the fridge and opened it, finding all sorts of groceries inside it, mostly your favorite food and probably Felix's.
"Hungry?" you looked back at him and as if on que, his stomach growled.
You giggled and he laughed, the sound filling up your ears and tugging at your heart.
"I'll take that as a yes. Do you wanna cook together?" you asked and he nodded eagerly.
"I'd love that." Felix answered with a sweet smile so the two of you pulled your sleeves up and washed your hands, getting ready to tackle dinner together as you maneuvered the unknown space.
"What made you decide to apply to this program? You don't seem like you'd have a problem finding a partner." you started the conversation and his cheeks became rosy as he chuckled.
"Well, I tend to fall for the wrong people. The ones who use my kindness against me. And I really don't wanna hurt anymore or just experiment and 'try' again. I want to know that I have the real deal, you know? To be sure that the person is my ride or die."
The honesty in his answer took you by surprise.
'I want my partner to always be honest with me, to tell me the truth even if it is painful.'
You remembered the line you wrote when you were asked to put down on paper everything you wanted in a partner. They had probably looked at Felix's personality test as well as yours, and the things you had written down as your dream partner, putting the two of you together that way.
Your cheeks burned as you remembered how high your percentage is. He must really be the man from your dreams which would make you the woman of his. Butterflies swarmed your stomach.
"What about you?" Felix snapped you out of your thoughts as you continued cleaning the meat.
"Oh, same. I was disappointed many times before. I just want to find someone that will feel like home." you smiled at him.
"Exactly." he agreed. "So, what do you think the tests will look like? Do you think they'll be similar to the ones we had to do while applying?"
"My guess is as good as yours. Though, I must admit I do feel a bit uneasy with all the people not being allowed to say what happened while they were here..." you trailed off, before sighing.
"Then again, they all looked so happy with their partners." you finished. "And I want that."
"Yeah, I feel a bit uneasy myself but we'll go through this together, right?" Felix gave you a shy smile and you nodded as your cheeks warmed up.
After cooking dinner and eating, you had learned a bit more about each other, finding it incredibly easy to keep the conversation going like you've already talked many times before, sharing similar viewpoints and interests. It seemed too easy and you knew that you didn't have to necessarily agree on everything or love all the same things to be a match.
There was definitely something deeper there than the superficial stuff like hobbies and favorite colors when you've already gotten to 89% without even interacting with each other.
"Should we do a tour of the house?" Felix asked when you finished cleaning up.
"Sure, let's do it." you smiled and one by one, you visited all of the rooms starting with the living room that was next to the kitchen.
"Oh, we have a tv." you pursed your lips. "I thought we weren't allowed any kind of electronics."
"I guess they thought having movie nights at home is a date we'd both enjoy." Felix pointed to all the dvds on the shelves around the tv. "We have a good collection of every genre. Skipping horror though, I'm not a fan of scary things." he visibly shivered and you chuckled a little.
"I'm fine with those." you said and Felix gasped a little.
"Well if you want us to watch horror movies together just be prepared that I will be hiding behind like five blankets and probably crying my eyes out."
"Aw, it's okay, we don't have to watch them if they scare you so much." you smiled at him, making his heart skip a beat.
"I'll watch them for you. Well, kinda watch them since I'll be under all those protective blankets."
You chuckled together before you made your way upstairs. Your heart immediately skipped a beat and a shiver ran through your entire body when you saw the bed. Of course, you were meant to sleep together in it.
Felix noticed you staring at it, both of your faces red.
"I can sleep downstairs on the couch." he said, as if reading your mind.
"No!" you said a little too quickly. "I mean, I'd feel a lot safer if you were here with me." you admitted sheepishly.
"Oh." his smile was shy. "Then I'll be here with you."
Gosh, he is so sweet!, you thought, feeling overwhelmed that such a sweet person was your very own match. Not even a day with him and he already checked so many of your boxes. You hoped he felt the same for you.
"We have separate bathrooms." Felix noted and you looked to the right to see a door labeled with your name and on the left his name.
"I think there are no cameras in there, so that's why..." he trailed off and immediately you felt your stomach doing flips. They were really making sure you don't do any funny business which was kind of understandable since everything was being filmed. But then again, why wouldn't they make a special room for the two of you? You had so many questions and any possible answer created even more questions.
The two of you then decided to unpack, the sounds of opening and closing drawers filling up the space.
"We have a backyard." Felix said as he stood by the window in your room. "And a pool."
"It looks cozy except the pool. I don't know how to swim." you confessed, shivering a little.
"Really?" Felix looked a bit surprised. "Well, I love swimming so you can sunbathe while I swim?" he added with a giggle.
"I can." you nodded. "The entire house and the neighborhood looks so nice. Which brings me to this, have you seen another person since you got here?" you asked and Felix shook his head no.
"Neither have I. Weird, huh?" you said.
Felix opened his mouth to answer but the sound the doorbell ringing frightened you both.
"Is that... someone at the door?" he lifted one eyebrow.
"Let's go check together." you stood by his side as your heart hammered in your chest.
Felix walked first and you followed behind him, peering over his shoulders as he slowly opened the door.
You were greeted by a smiling woman and man, standing somewhat similarly to you and Felix.
"Hello, sorry to bother you. I'm Gina and this is Ethan. We were paired up today and noticed we were neighbours so we just wanted to say hi."
"Oh." Felix chuckled and you visibly relaxed, now standing beside him.
"This is y/n, and I'm Felix. Nice to meet you." you all shook hands, deciding to meet up tomorrow for breakfast since the program encouraged couples who were paired up at the same time to become friends.
"You okay?" Felix asked after closing the door.
"I just can't shake off this weird feeling." you shook your head.
Felix bit on his lip, his eyes raking all over your form gently as you hugged yourself. Tentatively, he reach out and brushed his knuckles on your cheek.
"I'm sure you just need time to adjust." he smiled, and you shivered from his gentle touch, your eyes fluttering.
"Yeah. Maybe a good night's sleep is all I need."
"There you go. Positive thoughts." Felix smiled brightly, warming you up instantly.
You got ready in your separate bathrooms and you came out first, claiming your side of the bed as you sat, leaning your back against the headboard and fidgeting with your fingers. Felix came in after a minute or so, smiling at you slightly as he hesitantly lifted up the covers and slid in.
"You sure you're okay with this?" he turned to you, his deep brown eyes looking big and doe like.
"Yes, I'm comfortable." you nodded. "You?"
"Of course. Just making sure you feel okay." Felix then smiled sweetly, making your stomach flip again.
"I am." you whispered. "Um, it's just weird not to have my phone to play with before sleeping." you looked around, noticing a stack of books on a shelf.
"Tell me about it. I'm like chronically online, it's a problem." Felix shook his head with a chuckle. "Or like playing videogames. My computer will be so dusty when we get out of here."
You giggled at him as he scrunched up his face and made a cute whiny sound.
"I like videogames too. We should play together soon."
"Wow, you really are the girl of my dreams." Felix looked at you, wiggling his eyebrows and you laughed, your entire body on fire from the giddiness he made you feel.
He slid down then, getting comfy on his side and you followed suit, relaxing between the clean sheets and melting into the soft pillow.
"How long do you think it will take us to get out of here?" you whispered after a few moments of silence.
"I hope not too long." Felix whispered back. "Sweet dreams, y/n." he added after another pause.
"Night, Felix." you smiled before turning on your side and closing your eyes.
You were nervous for what's to come but Felix's presence gave you a sense of comfort and safety you didn't know you needed. Just the sound of his breathing calmed you down and slowly lulled you to sleep.
Your eyes fluttered open and for a moment you were completely confused. You blinked a few times, rubbing the sleepiness from your eyes as you took in your surroundings.
Right. You had come to the Village of Love yesterday, with your match. Which made you turn around quickly and gasp when you noticed the other side of the bed was empty.
"F-Felix?" you said, your voice a little raspy from sleeping. For a moment, you felt the dread creeping in but then you heard clinking, followed by a few curses coming from downstairs.
Upon arriving to the kitchen you were greeted by a frantic and disheveled Felix. You had to supress in a laugh, but it still seeped out in small giggles.
"Oh, y/n!" he exclaimed, turning around with his eyes slightly widened and his pink lips parted. "I barely slept last night so I got up like at 6am? I wanted to make myself useful so I tried making pancakes? I swear they taste better than they look! It's just that I'm usually not a morning person so-"
"Felix." you stopped his rambling, coming closer to him as you chuckled into your palm, your other hand gently placed on his arm to soothe him.
"Felix, it's okay. I'm sure the pancakes are delicious." you looked down at the half burned scraps of pancakes. "It's the thought that counts." you added with a giggle. "Aren't we meeting our neighbors for breakfast anyways?"
"Oh. That's right, we are. I'm silly." he sighed, turning the stove off with a defeated pout.
"You're cute." you said without thinking, your cheeks warming up as soon as those words left your mouth.
"You think so?" Felix chuckled, a little smirk forming on his lips and you nodded as he stared at you intently. "You're cuter." he leaned in, his breath hitting your face and you almost dissolved right then and there.
"Oh, shut up." you chuckled, making him laugh. "Let's go get dressed."
You got ready in your separate bathrooms, wondering how everything will play out for however long you'll be here. You decided to wear a dress with a floral pattern, something comfy and flowy. You hoped Felix would like it as much as you did.
And he seemed to be stunned the moment you walked out of the bathroom, giving you elevator eyes as he gulped visibly, his cheeks becoming rosy. You stood there nervously as he seemed to be lost in a trance.
"Felix?"
"Oh." he looked up at your face, the redness creeping up on his neck. "You look really pretty."
"Thank you." you giggled, your heart rate picking up while he smiled at you.
"Shall we?" he asked, reaching his hand towards you. You nodded, sliding your hand into his, your palms pressed together and fingers entwined.
They fit perfectly together, like two pieces of a puzzle that were waiting to be completed forever.
You met up with Gina and Ethan who were also holding hands, waving at you enthusiastically.
"Morning, neighbors!" Ethan smiled at the two of you.
"Good morning." you smiled back as everyone greeted each other.
"Did you get the map of the village?" Gina asked and Felix nodded.
"Found it in the living room this morning."
"Us too. Isn't it crazy having all these cameras around?" Gina chuckled and you looked around, noticing that all over the neighborhood there were cameras on every lamp post, every driveway, every front door.
The uneasiness settled in your chest again and you squeezed Felix's hand. He looked at you, squeezing back and giving you a small, reassuring smile. The restaurant wasn't too far away, it was a garden with lots of big trees giving shade to the tables, the sweet smell of colorful flowers mixed with the nice smell of food being cooked, making you even more hungry than you were. Finally, you saw other couples, chatting at different tables and you felt much more at ease. It felt normal.
There was soft music playing from the little building where you presumed the kitchen and servers were situated. The four of you found a table near a koi pond, excitement taking over you as you looked at the pretty fishes swimming around.
"I was about to reach for my phone and take a picture." Felix chuckled and Ethan nodded.
"Same." he said and you shook your head, thinking about how you'd probably do the same thing.
You stared at the koi fishes, who seemed to be mindlessly floating back and forth, confined in such a small pond. You wondered if they ever wanted more freedom, a bigger pond or was this all they knew so they could never think about having more space. Maybe they felt safe in a familiar, tiny enviroment.
One of the servers came to your table with a pen and notepad, writing down your orders and snapping you out of your thoughts.
The four of you made small talk before your food arrived.
"At least these pancakes look better than mine." Felix noted when the plate was placed before him and you chuckled.
"So, what do you guys think the tests will look like?" Gina asked suddenly while you ate. You looked up at the camera above your table and swallowed nervously.
"Isn't it kinda like a video game? We got a map of the place, we will have objectives or tests, we got our 'safe room', like our house where we have supplies..." Felix started and Ethan chuckled.
"I just hope there are no zombies or such. Or like damage." he added and the four of you laughed.
"I'm sure it can't be that bad." you said.
"How high is your percentage?" Gina asked.
"89%." you answered and she gasped a little.
"Ours is 74%. I guess we'll be here longer than y'all." she pouted.
"Well, we can't know that. When we have no idea what awaits us." Ethan said. He was right, you had no idea what Cupid Corp. planned out to put your connection to the test. Your eyes fell on the pond again, the koi fishes spinning around and around in circles, the repetitive motion almost making you dizzy.
~
"Do you wanna take a walk around the village?" Felix asked after you parted ways with the friendly couple next door.
"Yeah, sounds good. I need to get some blood flowing in my legs, we sat for so long."
"We did, I think we clicked with them too. Could it be they put us close to each other so we could become friends?" Felix asked when the two of you started walking, your hands entwined again, making your heart beat faster.
"Probably. I have a feeling nothing is random here." you pursed your lips.
"Me too." he agreed.
The village was really something out of a fairytale book. Not only were the houses cute but there was a cute bakery, a gallery, a flower shop, a cafe and a few other stores for groceries and such scattered around. There was even a little park for picnics and a forest to ride your bike or take a walk there. You saw other people working in all the buildings and couples walking around or sitting in the cafe or riding their bikes. It looked different than yesterday, when everything seemed eerily quiet and abandoned.
You and Felix talked about your families and job, getting to know some random facts about each other as you walked around, the sun warming your bodies up. It felt like you knew each other forever.
That evening, you decided to have your first movie night date. After a short debate since you were both indecisive, you settled on Clueless, a classic, and prepared some snacks and blankets to make the viewing more cozy.
Felix seemed a little nervous and fidgety as you got comfy on the couch, some distance created between you. He played with his fingers and the blanket, picking on it as you clicked play on the tv.
"You okay?" you asked and he nodded quickly, grabbing the bowl of popcorn.
"It's just... I like to cuddle while watching movies. Or um, I like to cuddle whenever, a lot. Physical touch is definitely one of my biggest love languages. I hope you're okay with that." Felix confessed, redness covering his freckled cheeks.
You sighed in relief, a giggle escaping your lips as you scooted closer to him, making his breath hitch.
"Okay? I'm estatic. I'm a big cuddler, it's one of my top love languages too." you nodded and Felix smiled sweetly at you.
"Right. I keep forgetting we matched so well and start feeling nervous. I don't wanna do something wrong, you know? And with the cameras watching, it adds to the awkwardness." he explained.
"I'll tell you if I'm uncomfortable with anything, okay? And you tell me too. Open communication is important." you said and Felix nodded, agreeing. "And forget about the cameras for now. I'm trying not to think about them supervising us the entire time. Let's just enjoy the movie."
"You're really sweet, y/n." Felix smiled cutely, his eyes shining as he stared at you, tongue darting out to wet his plump lips.
You followed the movement for a second, your heart fluttering.
"Says you." you chuckled, poking his cheek and he giggled, relaxing next to you and scooting even closer so that your legs and shoulders touched.
Pretty soon, both of you were relaxed, forgetting that you were being filmed as you enjoyed the movie, laughing and repeating the iconic lines. Your head ended up on Felix's shoulder at one point and his heart started beating fast instantly, his hand reaching for yours. He caressed your skin with his thumb as you giggled at the tv. You've never felt this comfortable with someone you just met.
The entire day was filled with positive experiences that you almost forgot about the weird dread gathering in the pit of your stomach.
You felt a huge attraction towards Felix, your body craved to be in his warmth and when you laid in bed next to him that night, you wanted nothing more than to roll over and hold him. But maybe it was too early for that, you thought as nervousness washed over you.
"Good night, y/n." his warm voice was quiet in the darkness of the room.
"Good night, Felix."
~
The man in the chair leaned over his computer, typing in the log of the day. The two of you were perfect subjects for this village, both of you sweet and kind, ready to welcome each other into your lives. He looked at all the screens that filmed your quiet house, eyes lingering on your calm, sleeping forms. Soon, everything will change.
A whole week has passed by perfectly. It was a little too quiet, too perfect for your liking. You wondered when the actual tests would start, when you were gonna get an envelope with some objective you have to fulfill. It made you feel uneasy the entire time and you had always trusted your intuition so you knew your gut feeling was right.
You had expressed this to Felix and even though he was nervous about the whole experience too, he tried to reassure you that it can't be that bad. That maybe the test had already started by just watching the two of you interact with each other.
It sounded plausible so it calmed you down just a little bit.
At the same time, you couldn't deny the connection building between you and your match. Felix was everything you ever wanted and more, kind and thoughtful, funny and sweet, he listened to you with interest, happy to know every little detail about you; his heart was pure and full of love, not just for you but for everyone. He made you melt on the spot with just one look and smile.
Every time you cuddled while watching movies, you got a little closer, the warmth of his body enveloping you, messing with your senses. You loved being close to him like that and he loved being held or holding you, it didn't matter as long as you were embracing each other in any way.
"It's such a beautiful sunny day. We could have a date by the pool?" Felix suggested one morning, batting his eyelashes at you and pouting cutely.
"Oh, sure. But I'll be watching you as I sunbathe because well, you know." you shrugged.
"Are you scared of the water? I could help you, teach you how to swim. It's good to face your fears." he smiled encouragingly and you chuckled, grabbing his hand.
"Maybe it is. I'll think about it." you smiled.
"Great! That's progress." Felix leaned in, pressing a chaste kiss on your cheek and it was enough to make your heart burst.
For some reason, you didn't think about how the two of you will be almost naked by the pool and that thought crossed your mind only after you put your bathing suit on in the bathroom. A little gasp escaped your lips as your cheeks became completely red.
You decided to throw a little dress over your frame before you walked into the room. Felix was already waiting for you, dressed in swim trunks and a t-shirt. You blushed at the sight of his legs, mentally scolding yourself and trying to calm down your heart.
Felix didn't hesitate to throw his shirt off as soon as you got to the pool. Your eyes immediately went to his abs and chest, a warmness spreading within you as you shifted. He noticed your look, his face and ears warming up. He smirked a little, enjoying the fact that he made you squirm.
"Ugh, I- I left my sunscreen upstairs." you whined.
"I'll go get it for you." Felix said. "Is it in the bathroom?"
You nodded and thanked him as he made his way into the house. After you took your dress off, your attention was grabbed by a sloshing sound of water inside the pool. Your brows furrowed, there was no wind. You gulped, coming closer to the edge of the pool, staring at your distorted reflection as the water kept sloshing.
It was just a milisecond, you couldn't react or realize what was happening, it was as if something invisible had pulled you into the water. With a loud splash your body was submerged under the surface as you started flailing your arms and legs, bubbles coming up where you were desperately trying to breathe. You managed to pull your head above water for a second, panicking as you tried to grab onto the edge of the pool, turning around just in time to see Felix running towards the pool with a terrified expression on his face. You couldn't keep yourself above water but just before you were completely submerged again, a pair of arms wrapped around you, pulling you up to the surface.
You gasped, trying to catch your breath as you clutched onto Felix and he pulled you close, pressing your body into his.
"You're okay, love. I got you. I got you." he kept repeating as he caressed you, holding you tightly as he led you to the shallow part of the pool.
Tears spilled out of your eyes as you sobbed, wrapping your arms around Felix's body, your face buried in his neck.
"It's okay. I'm here. Shh." he tried to soothe you as your body shook against him.
Neither of you noticed the shadow moving away from the window inside your kitchen.
"Let's get you out." Felix led you towards one of the chairs and you sat down as he wrapped a towel around you. He caressed your hair shortly as he grabbed another chair, pulling it closer so it was facing you. He sat down and grabbed your face gently.
"Can you tell me what happened?"
"I- I don't know." your lips trembled.
"I was just standing there and next thing I know, I'm underwater."
"Maybe you slipped?" Felix wondered, his brows furrowed.
"No, it was like something pulled me in." you swallowed and Felix looked back at the calm water.
"Well, whatever it was I am not leaving you alone by the pool anymore. I won't let this happen to you again." he promised, pulling you into a hug, your cheek pressed against his chest. You shivered as you held onto him, but this time it was because you felt his skin against yours. Sure, you held onto him in the pool but you were in such a state of panic that you didn't even feel your body let alone his.
You leaned back a little and looked up at Felix. His eyes travelled down to your lips and he licked at his. Your stomach swarmed with butterflies as your face neared his. Felix held you tighter as your hot breaths mingled, before he pressed his plump lips on yours. You melted instantly as you started moving together, kissing gently and savoring every second of your lips touching like that.
It felt like it was meant to be, like you were made to kiss his lips and he was made to be yours. Felix licked at your bottom lip and you parted them, letting his tongue touch and play with yours. Pressing your body against his even more, you almost forgot about Cupid Corp., the cameras, the pool. But when he bit on your bottom lip, pulling it between his teeth, his hands squeezing your waist, you had a moment of clarity and pulled away with a gasp.
"We can't get carried away." you panted and Felix nodded, swallowing as his dark eyes lingered on your lips. His cheeks were red, his hair messy and his lips looked even more pink after kissing you.
"Sorry. I couldn't help myself, love. I'm really attracted to you." Felix said, pressing his forehead against yours.
"Me too. I like you a lot, Lixie." you smiled and he chuckled sweetly, pressing a few kisses on your lips and cheeks.
"I like you a lot too. I'm so glad I signed up for this program." he said, pulling you into another hug.
"I'm glad to be here too." you tangled your hands in his hair, caressing him and he sighed happily.
"Do you still wanna stay by the pool or you wanna do something else?" he asked and you looked at the water.
"I'll sit here and you go swim." you smiled.
"Are you sure?"
"100%." you nodded and with that, he pecked your lips again and practically skipped towards the pool. You giggled to yourself, knowing he really wanted to swim so you were content with sitting by the pool and just watching his beautiful form in the water.
Goosebumps rose on your neck and you turned to look at the house, feeling like there was some kind of presence there. You tried shrugging it off as you turned back to Felix, watching him having fun and waving at you cutely.
When he got out of the water, you couldn't help the admiration in your eyes as they raked all over his naked wet body, the droplets of water sliding from his chest to his abs and disappearing under the waistband of his swim trunks. Your throat was very much dry in that moment, but your panties were not. Felix smirked at you as he walked slowly, probably trying to seduce you even though you already folded.
He leaned over you, his hands on the armrests of the chair, the water from his body dripping onto yours.
"Enjoyed the view?" he asked as you looked up at him.
"Very much so." you smirked back and he leaned in to kiss you.
"I'm glad you did." he kissed you again. "Let's get inside, it's getting dark." Felix added and the two of you made your way into your house.
As soon as you walked in, a loud beeping noise scared the both of you. You covered your ears as Felix looked around.
"What is that?!" you asked.
"I don't know." Felix yelled over the piercing noise. He followed it with you trailing behind him and holding onto his back.
"Oh. Look!" he exclaimed, grabbing the round device you had gotten in the mail.
As soon as he clicked the button, the loud sound stopped, the screen lighting up.
90%. Congratulations, Felix and Y/n!
"D-did we get a point because of me drowning in the pool?" you shivered.
"I think we got a point 'cause I saved you." Felix bit on his lip, his expression turning into one of worry. You looked up at the camera in the kitchen, your eyes wide. Just what kind of sick game were Cupid Corp. playing? And what did they have in store for you?
~
"You think they really tried to drown me on purpose?" you asked Felix when the two of you got under the covers.
"It seems so." he said as he chewed on his lip.
"I think they could escalate things." you gulped and Felix looked at you, scooting closer to your side.
"What kind of test is that? Who wouldn't jump in to save someone they love? And even someone they don't know. I'd jump in anyways." Felix got upset.
"I know, I don't understand either."
"At least we are closer to 100%." Felix said, reaching out for you. You got closer to him and he smiled sweetly, his arm wrapping around your waist.
"Will you let me hold you like this?" he whispered, rubbing the tip of his nose against yours.
"Yeah, of course." you whispered back, kissing his sweet lips.
"I'll keep you safe, love." he smiled.
"I hope they don't hurt you."
"They can try. I'm stronger than I seem."
"I belive that." you nuzzled into him as you wrapped around each other. It felt so good to be in his embrace, like nothing bad could ever happen to you.
When Felix opened his eyes the next morning and saw you sleeping so soundly in his arms, he almost melted into a puddle. He gently tucked your hair behind your ear, caressing your face as his sleepy eyes observed you.
It didn't take long for you to wake up too, seeing that Felix was already looking at you made you whine and shut your eyes tightly.
"Don't look at me." you said.
"Why?" Felix chuckled as you tried hiding your face with your hands.
"Because I don't look the best when I wake up."
"What are you talking about?" Felix gently moved your hands away. "You're beautiful." he added and leaned in to kiss you but you blocked him quickly with your hand.
"Morning breath."
"Do I look like I care?" he giggled against your palm, grabbing your hand in his and kissing you despite your protests.
"So beautiful." he rasped.
"Has anyone ever told you that you're a sweet talker?" you smirked.
"No, but I'll take that as a compliment." Felix giggled. "Mm. Let's stay like this." he pulled you closer, his chin resting on the top of your head.
"I'd love to. But don't we have a brunch with Gina and Ethan?"
"Ugh. We do. Five more minutes." Felix said and you giggled, pressing your lips into his pulse. You heard his breath hitch and felt him tremble as your lips brushed against his skin.
"Don't make it harder for me to resist you, love." he whispered and kissed your head, making your cheeks warm up instantly.
"Sorry." you leaned back and he gave you a lazy smirk as he played with your hair.
~
"Ethan is sick." Gina whispered to the two of you after you rang the doorbell.
"Sick?" your brows furrowed as you noticed her eyes being shifty, darting left to right like she was on high alert, looking around to spot danger.
"Yes. High fever. Tremors. Headache." she craned her neck to look behind the two of you and you followed her eyesight, not noticing anything out of the ordinary.
"I have to go. I have to go. They're watching, you know? They're watching." she murmured before disappearing into the darkness of her house and closing the door, the clicking sound indicating she had locked it.
"T-that was weird." you swallowed.
"Very weird." Felix backed away, pulling you with him. "You wanna go to brunch still?"
"Yeah." you nodded as the two of you walked away from your neighbor's house.
You kept throwing glances back, noticing the curtain on one of the windows moving as a figure disappeared behind it.
You couldn't stop thinking about the state Gina was in and what the hell was happening inside her house?
Sitting by the koi pond, you couldn't help but think that all of you were just koi fishes and the village was just one small pond that was being observed by a bigger creature.
"You okay?" Felix put his arm around your shoulder, his other hand placed on your knee.
"Just worried about Gina and Ethan. And... us."
"Us?"
"What if the same happens to us. Or worse." you swallowed, your eyes becoming big as you looked at Felix, fear bubbling up inside you.
"It won't."
"How do you know that?" you asked, your eyes filling up with tears.
"I'll keep us safe, I promise." Felix pressed a lingering kiss on your forehead.
Your heart was still hammering in your chest, your stomach churning.
Something was wrong.
~
"Y/n, do you trust me?" Felix held you as the two of you stood in the shallow part of the pool.
"I do. It's just-"
"You're scared, I know. If it becomes too much, we'll get out immediately. But I'd love it if you at least tried. I'll hold you the entire time, okay? I won't let you out of my sight."
His reassuring words chipped away at your fear, replacing it with warmness and safety. You've never met someone like Felix, someone who was so invested in helping you get over your phobia.
"Okay, we'll start walking first." he pulled you in, holding you against him as you clutched at him.
"Relax." he tried soothing you as his hands caressed you and slowly but surely you started feeling relaxed.
"I'll hold you and swim. You try to move your legs like I told you, okay?" Felix guided you and you struggled a little at the beginning but the more he smiled at you and reassured you, the more confident you felt.
"Just stay close." you said.
"Of course, sweetheart." he smiled and your heart leaped out of your chest as your face warmed up.
Soon, you didn't even realize you were moving on your own, with Felix hovering next to you.
"You did it, y/n!" he laughed, his arms wrapping around your waist as he pulled you into his body.
"All thanks to you, Lixie." you giggled, turning around in his arms so you could look at him.
"Well, you had the will to try so it's on you too." he said, pecking your lips. His kisses were addictive, whenever he'd press his lips on yours, it was hard to stop as the two of you clung onto each other like you've been glued together.
The kisses escalated as your tongues massaged each other, your hands roaming on his freckled back. Your legs wrapped around him and he pulled you in closer, chest against chest, his hands on your butt.
"F-Felix." you stuttered, nails digging into his shoulders when you felt his erection brushing against your core.
"I'm sorry." his arms wrapped around your waist as he buried his face in your neck, lapping at the droplets of water dripping down your skin. "I can't help it. You're so delicious, sweetheart." he nipped at your sensitive neck.
"T-the cameras." you looked around at the five different cameras in the backyard.
"I know. I know." Felix kissed your lips with a huff before he swam you both back to the shallow part.
"You can get out if you want. And give me a second to calm down." he looked at you sheepishly.
"Okay." you giggled, wrapping your body up with a towel.
Felix swam a little more while you made some lemonade, keeping an eye on him from the kitchen window.
He got out just in time as you brought the refreshing drink outside. He wiped his body with the towel quickly, throwing it aside as he pulled you closer, making you squeal, the two of you losing balance. You ended up in his lap as he sat in the chair and you chuckled as he squeezed you tightly, rubbing his cheek against your back.
"Are you sure this is a smart position right now?" you asked and he smirked at you.
Before he could answer, the familiar beeping sound blasted next to the two of you. Your heads snapped towards the device you brought everywhere, hoping the percentage would go up.
"Felix! 92%!" you gasped when you grabbed it.
"92? How did we get two points?" he stared at it.
"I have no idea! But we should celebrate. Just 8 more. And then we can leave together." you smiled as you turned you body towards him.
"I can't wait, my love." Felix smiled, leaving kisses on your arm.
You wondered why you got two points. And if it was really that easy.
~
That night, Felix was clingier than usual, completely wrapped around you as he spooned you. His lips kept pressing gentle kisses on your neck and shoulder, making goosebumps rise on your skin, heat erupting inside you.
Felix couldn't help it anymore, his own body betrayed him as he got excited again, being so close to you, feeling you pressed against him, he craved nothing more than to be even closer to you.
"L-Lix." you felt him against your backside.
"Fuck, I'm sorry. Don't worry about it, it'll go away." Felix whimpered quietly, and you squeezed his wrist as he pressed into you tighter, unable to contain himself.
"It's okay." you guided his hand down to your panties, feeling desperate for his touch too.
"Y/n." he whispered. "What about the camera?"
"It's dark. And they can't see under the covers. As long as we stay quiet and don't move too much, we should be fine." you whispered back, pushing his hand beneath the waistband of your underwear.
"That's a test within itself." Felix joked and you giggled.
"Please, Felix." you begged as he hesitated.
"Fuck, baby. You don't have to beg for me. You have me always." he bit on your shoulder, his fingers exploring until they pressed into your clit when you spread your legs just a little so he can have more access. Felix started drawing slow figure eights on your sensitive clit, dipping his fingertips into your heat to gather some wetness and smear it around.
Your breath hitched and you gripped onto the cover, bringing it closer to your lips so you could muffle the little sighs coming out. His tongue darted out to lick at you neck as he played with your clit, moving slower but pressing hard. Felix sunk his teeth into your neck, sucking on it and creating a purple bruise marking you as his. You moaned quietly and he shushed you, teasing your little clit and making you clench around nothing.
"Felix." you said quietly.
"Yes, baby?" he whispered between kisses.
"I wanna touch you too." you said, so quiet so that only he could hear it. Felix's cock twitched against the back of your thigh.
"Okay." he said and you turned around, sliding your panties off and pushing them aside. Felix did the same with his underwear and grabbed your leg, putting it over his so he could spread you a little.
His hand was back between your legs, now without any tight obstacles and you had to bite back a moan as your eyes flitted towards the red dot blinking in the corner. You gripped the cover and pulled it up, only leaving some space for air and so you and Felix can kind of see each other.
You sneaked your hand down his chest and abs, fingers playing with his happy trail leading down to his leaky cock. The tip was already wet with pre cum and Felix almost groaned when you touched him, smearing it around as your fingers massaged him.
"B-baby." the tip of his nose touched yours and he leaned in to kiss you as your hand wrapped around his length. He sighed into your mouth and you swallowed it, breathing in his air while he slowly pushed his finger inside your welcoming heat.
You bit on his lower lip when he pushed in deep, your pussy clenching and begging for more. Felix groaned quietly, pushing into your hand while you moved it slowly, giving him gentle pleasure. Both of you moved in sync with each other, keeping the slow and torturous pace that was somehow sweet. You were both lingering on edge, wanting more.
Felix pulled his finger out and before you could protest, he started pushing two fingers in. The entire time you were making out, swallowing each other's moans and breaths.
"God, faster please." Felix whispered and you looked at the direction of the camera again, excitement rushing through you at the thought of getting caught. You sped up, pumping his cock as he fucked your pussy harder.
"Shh, quiet down love." he said when you started moaning silently.
"Sorry." you whispered and leaned in to kiss his neck. Felix immediately threw his head back, a quiet grunt escaping his lips as you attacked his skin with bites and kisses, flicking your wrist.
"I- I- can't." Felix groaned quietly. "Y/n." his fingers stilled inside you as he came, spilling his hot cum on your thigh, hand and the sheets. You helped him ride his high, kissing his lips and whispering quiet praises against them.
"Bring your legs up." he said, pressing your legs together, sliding his arm under your knees and lifting them towards him.
"Wh-what..."
"Shh. Trust me, sweetheart." he said as he leaned over you a little, his fingers sliding on your wet slit. He slowly pushed them back in, the position of your legs lifted up and pressed together like you were in a fetal position added to the pressure between your legs, his fingertips pressing right into your sweet spot.
"F-Felix!" you whimpered and he pressed his free hand against your lips, shushing you as he started fucking his fingers in and out of you.
You feared that this was definitely visible on the camera, the movement of his hand was too frantic under the sheets. Your muffled whines made Felix lean in and leave sweet kisses on your face.
"Shh, it's okay, just relax and let go, sweetheart." he cooed at you, his tongue licking at your ear.
Your eyes fluttered closed as he removed his hand from your face and pressed his lips on yours, his fingers ramming into your sweet spot repeatedly.
"Lix." you whined against his lips as he licked at them.
"Cum for me love." he encouraged and your pussy clenched around his fingers, your heart beating out of your chest as you let go, spilling your release on his fingers, some of it ending up on the mattress below you.
"Shit." he cursed quietly, caressing your wet pussy.
You clutched onto him, kissing him again like you needed it to breathe.
"You okay?" he asked, his hand searching around for his boxers.
"Y-yeah." you answered. "You?"
"More than okay." he smiled as he grabbed the boxers and cleaned both of you up as much as he could. "Um. We can't really change the sheets now, it would look suspicious." he added, throwing both of your underwear sneakily on the floor next to his side, where the camera wouldn't see.
"We can sleep on your side?"
Felix smiled and pulled you over, making you giggle quietly as the two of you settled against each other. He buried his face in your neck, his hand gently caressing your figure as you played with his hair, running your fingers through his soft locks.
The man in the chair smirked. Bingo.
When your eyes fluttered open the next morning, you were greeted with the cutest sight. Felix was still sleeping, his face smushed against the pillow as he drooled a little. Overwhelmed with your growing feelings for him, you leaned in and bit at his cheek.
Felix groaned quietly and you giggled, kissing where you had bitten him before you went lower, biting his neck and then his shoulder.
"Y/n." his deep voice made you shiver and you giggled against his soft skin again before sinking your teeth into his arm. His eyes fluttered open as he smacked his lips and looked at you.
"Interesting way to wake me up, not gonna lie." he smirked a little before grabbing you and making you squeal as he suddenly flipped the two of you, him being on top.
"Felix!" you chuckled when his fingers ghosted on your sides, tickling you slightly.
"Yes, sweetheart?" he smirked, burying his face in your neck and teasing you with little licks and kisses.
"D-don't. It's daytime, the camera-"
"I'm just gonna bite you a little. Return the favor." he blew on your neck before biting into your skin and sucking. You had to bite on your lip to stop yourself from moaning. Isn't this prohibited too?
"F-Felix, you have to stop." you whined.
"You're lucky the cameras are here. Otherwise, nothing would be able to save you from me." he wiggled his eyebrows and you chuckled, playfully pushing him away.
The morning started beautifully and you completely forgot about the rules whenever Felix smiled at you. You were both walking on cloud 9 and you couldn't wait to get out of this place so you can go anywhere with him by your side.
"Do you think they saw us last night?" Felix asked while the two of you munched on your food.
"I hope not." you said, your cheeks becoming red as you looked away from him.
"Getting shy on me, sweetheart?" Felix smirked, fingers brushing against your cheek.
"A little." you confessed, biting on your lip as your heart sped up.
"Don't be." he smiled wide as he leaned in, pecking your face with kisses. You started chuckling before you grabbed his face and kissed his lips.
"There. Better?" you asked and he nodded.
"Much better." Felix said and stood up to put his plate away. You took another sip of your coffee before a loud crash made you jump.
You turned around instantly to see the plate broken into pieces and Felix grabbing at his stomach.
"F-Felix?" you stood up abruptly, your chair flying on the floor.
Felix struggled to open his mouth and speak, he struggled to breathe as he clutched at both his stomach and chest.
"Oh my god! Felix!" you cried, grabbing at him as his face got red and his eyes watered.
"W-what is happening?!" you panicked, not having any kind of phone or knowing what to do in that moment. You turned to the camera in the corner.
"Help us, you fucking assholes!" you yelled at the camera as Felix shook and heaved in your arms.
A moment passed and his breathing started getting more normal, his face becoming paler in contrast to the redness that appeared before. His eyes were glassy, hands shaking as he slumped against you, falling to his knees. You quickly wrapped your arms around him as he gripped at you, seeking comfort from you. Heat radiated from his body and you touched his forehead, realizing he was burning up with a fever.
"Oh, Felix. Can you hear me?" you held his face in your hands as he looked through you.
His lips opened and closed a few times and he blinked before focusing on your eyes.
"I-it hurts." he rasped, his fingers desperately digging into your arms.
"What hurts, baby?" your body filled up with fear and anger. They did this.
"Everything." Felix sniffled and you helped him get up as he leaned on you.
"Let's get you to the couch." you led him to the living room before making him sit down. He looked horrible, a 180 from just a few moments ago when everything was normal. He was sweating profusely, his skin pale, his breathing heavy.
The doorbell suddenly rang, making you jolt.
"I'll be right back." you said, covering Felix up with a blanket as he was shivering even though he was burning up.
You had no idea who to expect at the door, maybe a paramedic, maybe a savior, maybe an explanation.
But you didn't expect Gina.
"G-Gina?" you eyes widened.
"Here." she shoved a box in your arms.
"W-what is this?" you asked.
"Medicine. They said... I had to deliver it to you. He'll be okay like Ethan. Just be careful. Be careful. They watch, you know? They know everything. They know." she looked a little panicked before she turned around, murmuring to herself and repeating how they watch and they know.
You opened up the box and sure enough there were different vitamins, medicine and bags of tea inside it.
You turned to look at the camera with a scowl on your face before you rushed off to Felix.
"Y/n." Felix whimpered, his bottom lip trembling as he looked up at you with teary eyes.
"It's okay, baby. You'll be okay." you tried to calm him down even though you were panicking too. You quickly fluffed up the pillows and helped him lie down.
"Are you comfy?" you asked.
"C-cold." he shivered, clutching onto the blanket.
"I'll bring another blanket for you." you said.
"Don't leave me!" Felix looked panicked as he gripped at your wrist.
"I won't, I'll be right back, I promise." you leaned down to kiss his burning forehead. He made a little noise but still let you go, albeit reluctantly. After finding another blanket, you tucked him in, taking it upon you to make him some tea, give him medicine and try to get his fever down however you could. You say next to his legs and placed a wet cloth on his forehead making him whine as he threw his arm around your thighs.
It was weird. The way he suddenly developed a high fever was unnatural. He wasn't sneezing or coughing, just shaking and sweating. You racked your brain, spinning different scenarios in your head and ways of how they could make him sick.
Then it clicked. The food.
But, how did you not get sick, just Felix? You couldn't understand how it was possible for these faceless and nameless individuals to play god with your health and safety. And what the hell did that have to do with you being a good match?
You wondered if the two of you could leave before you get to 100. You've never heard of such cases but surely there was a way? Maybe you could run away? Who could stop you, right? You have free will and you can leave whenever you want, you're not a prisoner.
"Y/n." Felix said weakly, his eyes fluttering open.
"Lixie. How do you feel? Any better?" you asked and he nodded.
"A bit." he said.
"I'll make you some soup." you said, knowing you have no other choice than to trust that not all your groceries were laced with some kind of virus.
"Okay." he said and you caressed his face shortly before standing up.
"Call me if you need anything. I won't be long." you said and he nodded again.
As the soup boiled, so did your anger. First they try to drown you then they make Felix sick? What's next on the menu? You looked up at the camera for the nth time.
"Hurt him again and I'll find you." you said quietly but the man behind the screen heard you, typing away on his laptop. He felt a bit bad for you but there was nothing he could do, he was just tasked to watch and report the progress.
"Can you sit up?" you asked Felix after you brought the warm soup to the living room.
"Ugh. Help me." Felix whimpered and you wrapped your arms around him as he held onto you, pulling him into a sitting position.
"I feel weakness in my arms and legs." he muttered.
"You'll be back on your feet in no time." you tried to soothe him as you sat next to him. "If they don't lace more of our food with a virus."
"How are you so sure?" Felix gulped.
"Because I'm taking care of you. And if they try something again I will burn this fucking village down." you made sure the camera picked up what you said and Felix let out a pained chuckle, grabbing at his side.
"Feeling protective over me?" he asked and your cheeks reddened instantly.
"I- I mean... Yes." you nodded and he smiled.
"If I wasn't in so much pain, I'd be really turned on right now." he said and you giggled, rolling your eyes playfully.
"Shut up and eat your soup."
"Feed me?" he pouted.
"Sure." you chuckled, shaking your head a little as he acted cute. Well cuter than usually.
"Will you cuddle me?" he asked after you managed to feed him the soup without making too much of a mess and you nodded, scooting closer to him and covering yourself up with the blanket too.
"Come here." you whispered and Felix leaned in, pressing his forehead into your neck. He was still warm but less than before and you hoped that the worst had passed.
"I don't think it was the food." he whispered suddenly, making goosebumps rise on your skin. The tv was loud enough to not let the camera hear what you were whispering about and after glancing at it you glanced down at Felix's sleepy face pressed against your chest.
"What do you mean?" you whispered into his hair.
"Look at my arm. Very carefully." he whispered back and you pretended to caress him until you uncovered his sleeve, acting nonchalant for the camera. Your brows furrowed as you stared.
"Is that a needle mark?" you asked.
"I think so." he looked up at you and you covered him up and held him tighter against you.
"You think they snuck in while we were sleeping and put some kind of virus into your body?" you asked and he nodded against you.
"That's sick. That's really sick. I- I think we should leave."
"We can't, not until we get to a 100." Felix said, rubbing his cheek against you and squeezing you tighter.
"B-but what if they do something worse?"
"It'll be okay." he muttered as he drifted off.
You sighed, running your hand through his hair soothingly as you stared at the tv absentmindedly, a random movie from the dvd collection playing on it.
You looked at him occasionally, admiring his cute sleeping face. Did you really have to wait until 100 to start your life with Felix?
Over the course of the next two days, you had been by Felix's side the entire time. The medicine worked perfectly and pretty soon Felix was back to his old self, healthy and full of energy.
"Y/n. Love." he held you tightly. "Thank you for taking care of me." he stared at you with sparkly eyes before he kissed you like his life depended on it, stealing your breath away.
"Of course." you smiled as you parted.
The loud sound of the device startled you both. Felix neared it, picking it up and looking at the screen.
"95." he scoffed.
"For what? Almost killing you." you said. "This is some sick game to you, isn't it?" you turned to the camera then, furious.
"Sweetheart, don't. We're almost done." Felix pulled you into him. "I have a plan." he whispered into your hair and you nodded.
You were going to escape the village.
~
That night, you got ready for bed as usual, your hands reaching to open the covers so you could get in. Before you could even touch the blanket, you were grabbed as Felix wrapped his arms around you and lifted you up, almost making you scream.
"Come with me." he pulled you into his bathroom.
"Felix we can't-"
"We're leaving anyways." he said, closing the door before pinning you against it. His hands held your wrists gently but firmly as he pressed his body against yours, nudging your legs apart with his knee.
"Felix." you let out a little gasp when his thigh pressed against your warmth.
He couldn't wait anymore, one hand still pinning your wrists and the other gently holding your chin as he crashed his lips into yours. Both of you whimpered quietly into each other's mouth as your tongues collided. Your mind became fuzzy instantly and Felix was becoming impatient, his hand wrapping around your neck and squeezing ever so slightly as his other hand slid down towards your chest.
"It's hard to keep my cool around you. I just want you so much." Felix talked lowly, both of his hands grabbing your breasts and massaging them. You whimpered, grinding against his thigh on instict.
"I want you too, Lixie. I can't wait anymore."
"Yeah? You want me to take you right here, against the door?" he smirked and you gasped as he leaned back with a smirk, pushing your panties aside and touching your clit.
"Y-yes." you whispered and he chuckled, hands on your waist as he swiftly turned you around to face the door. Your palms slapped against it and you dug your nails in as he slid fingers over your wet pussy.
"I think she's ready to take me." he leaned over you, lips brushing your ear as he pulled his boxers down. You swallowed when you felt the tip of his cock pressing against you. Warmness washed over you and you clenched in anticipation.
"Tell me if it's okay. Or do you want me to prep you?" he asked, his hand sliding down your back.
"J-just fuck me, Felix." you begged and he chuckled darkly.
"My baby has a dirty mouth, hm?" he slid his tip between your folds, back and forth, slowly, teasing you and torturing you.
"Please." you whimpered again and his own desperation got the best of him, he couldn't tease you and himself anymore so he slowly pushed in.
You moaned while he filled you up, your eyes fluttering shut as your knees buckled.
"Fuck. So tight." he groaned, bottoming out.
"L-Lix." you whimpered and he gripped your hips, moving slowly at first, letting you adjust.
You pushed back into him, meeting his thrusts as you let out moans of pleasure, your voice getting more high pitched every time his tip pressed into your sweet spot.
"You take me so well, baby. You really were made just for me." Felix moaned, fucking harder into you, his hips smacking against you.
You were a mess, not even able to answer as he got you drunk on his cock instantly.
"Fuck." Felix groaned as he looked at your ass, his hand coming down on your flesh, spanking you and making you whine out loud.
"You like that, sweetheart?" he smirked behind you and spanked you again.
"Y-yes!" you moaned and he sped up, his hips unforgiving as he shook your body, his hands gropping and slapping. He felt you clenching around him, his arms wrapping around you, hands on your breasts as he pulled on your nipples and played with them.
"Are you gonna cum for me, baby? Make a mess on my cock?" Felix fucked into you harder.
"Yes, ah!" you whimpered, your legs shaking as you spasmed and came all over his length.
"Good girl. You make me so proud." he groaned, chasing his high.
"Y-you have to pull out, I didn't take the pill... Since I got here." you moaned, feeling overstimulated.
"S-shit!" Felix whimpered, pulling out of your pussy and giving himself a few tugs, exploding behind you, his cum landing on your ass and back.
"So pretty." he gripped at your ass. "Mine."
"Yours." you whined back when he spanked you again.
He let out a low chuckle and wrapped his arms around you, turning you so you were facing him.
"That was absolutely not how I imagined our first time." Felix said, pecking your lips.
"How did you imagine it?" you held onto him with a smile on your face.
"Dinner, flowers, you know the whole thing. You put on some pretty lingerie for me and then we make love the entire night." he pressed his forehead against yours.
"Aren't you romantic?" you giggled, kissing him gently.
"I am. A lot." he grinned, pulling you into a hug.
"We can do all that when we get out of here. Which is what we should be doing right now."
"Yeah. You got your bag ready?" he asked and you nodded.
"Let's clean up then."
~
The streets were dark and empty, the only light that was coming from the lamp posts was dim and barely illuminated your path. It must've been around 3am. Dead silence filled up the space, every house was dark and quiet. No one was awake. The two of you stalked towards the gate, knowing the cameras are watching you.
There was no blind spots, they thought of everything. You didn't give a damn anymore. They can come and stop you themselves instead of playing these sick games.
Of course, the gate was locked.
"Felix?" you swallowed and his head snapped towards you. "That wasn't there when we got here, right?" you pointed and he gasped.
Electric fence.
Everywhere you turned to look, there it was.
"What the hell?" Felix frowned. "Are they crazy?"
"Obviously they are." you stated. "What should we do now?"
"How about the forest? Could be connected to like a main road? There's no way they put this electric fence all around." Felix looked frustrated.
"We could try." you nodded, your hand reaching out for his. With fingers entwined you hurried the other way.
Suddenly, a loud alarm pierced through the calm night air, making you both scream out as you grabbed at your ears, the sound pounding inside your head, making you want to pull your hair out.
Your vision became blurry and you tried to stay close to Felix as the sound became even louder and in the corner of your eye, you saw shadows moving.
Everything went black.
~
You woke up in your room, drenched in sweat. It was still dark out and you looked around, noticing Felix was still sleeping and the device on his night stand was blinking.
"Lix." you shook him gently.
"Hm."
"Lix." you repeated, leaning over him to look at the little screen.
"98?" you frowned. "Why?"
"What?" Felix sat up slowly. "What is it?"
"We're up to 98. Because we tried to escape?"
"I- I don't know. Ugh, I feel weird." Felix said and as soon as those words left his lips, you felt lightheaded yourself.
"I can't feel my legs." he gasped.
"What's happening to us? What did they do?" your eyes watered as you felt the same paralyzing feeling.
"T-they drugged us." Felix tried to grab at you but his arms weren't listening to him no matter how much he willed them to move.
"Felix." you whimpered, feeling some kind of tiredness washing over you. "I love you."
"I love you." he whispered back before everything went black again, neither of you noticing the device was now blinking with 99.
The light was barely coming in through the branches, the sun not being completely up yet. The air was damp and smelled of the earth, rain and trees. You took in a deep breath, wiggling your fingers against the ground, feeling the texture of moss under your fingertips.
You felt as if you were floating even though you were very clearly touching the ground. Your eyes slowly fluttered open and you gasped. Everything seemed distorted, like you couldn't focus your eyes on what's in front of you. Weird sounds filled up your ears, ones you couldn't recognize or understand. One moment they seemed like distant shouts and the other it was as if someone was talking gibberish right into your ear.
You lifted your shaky hands towards your face as you felt hot tears sliding down your cheek and into your hair splayed on the earth. Your hands. You were looking at them but it was as if they were separated from your body, like you weren't in control of them. You stared for however long, not being able to conceptualize if it was 10 seconds or an hour.
When you finally sat up, your head started spinning and you saw shadows moving in the corner of your eye, hiding behind the trees and melting into the ground. You blinked a couple of times but your sight remained blurry even when you got up. Your legs buckled for a second and you almost fell, grabbing at a tree next to you.
Find him. Find him.
Something whispered and you felt a buzzing sensation spreading all over your body. You grabbed at your ears as the whispers kept getting louder until-
FIND HIM!
A yell, a dark screeching voice echoed inside your brain.
Felix. You have to find him.
You had no idea how you even ended up in the forest and what was wrong with you while you were walking, your limbs felt like they were disconnected, your head pounded with a headache and your forehead was covered in a thin sheen of sweat.
You heard a smacking sound on your right, like something hit the wet ground and you turned to look but couldn't see anything there.
"Felix?!" your voice came out weak, your throat burning. "Felix!" you whimpered, more tears spilling out your eyes.
The whispers and the smacking sounds became louder, closer, more of them surrounding you. You started freaking out, panic building up within you. The sound of cracking caught your attention and you screamed out when the trees started growing in towards you, their branches becoming longer and reaching out to grab you. You kept screaming as you squatted down, covering your head up and crying.
"Please, stop!" you cried. It was silent. You lifted your head up slowly and the trees were exactly how they were before. No menacing branches hovering over you, reaching to take you.
You quickly stood up, your sight a little less blurry as adrenaline from the fear kicked in. Your legs reacted faster than you could anticipate as you started running, small twigs snapping under the weight of your feet.
The smacking sounds were back and now you could see what they were. All around you, koi fishes wiggled and smacked against the floor, trying to breathe in the dry air. You gasped, wondering how the hell was this happening.
You must be tripping.
The rational part of your mind reminded you that whoever was behind Cupid Corp. didn't hesitate to use all sorts of methods to execute their 'tests'.
They probably drugged you and everything you were seeing right now was a hallucination.
With that realization in mind, you carried on through the forest as it got thicker, ignoring all the voices around you and the fishes seemingly falling from the sky.
Things lurked in the bushes and behind trees, shivers running up your spine as it got darker. You thought you heard Felix calling for you among all those distorted voices.
"Felix?!"
"Y/n!" you heard a distant sound.
"Felix? Where are you?" you hurried up, almost slipping on the moss.
"I'm here!" the voice was clearer now, to your left and you ran and ran until you were stopped in your tracks. A huge koi wish wriggled on the ground where Felix should've been.
"Felix?" you were perplexed as you stared at the sight before you.
"Get me out of here."
Is he... inside the fish?
You noticed a knife on the floor next to it. You blinked and the next thing you knew you were standing in front of the fish with the knife in your hand. You stabbed into the flesh, blood oozing out as you started cutting up the fish like a maniac, guts spilling from the inside until Felix emerged, covered up in all of the fish goo, the stench of it making you nauseous.
"What the fuck?" you swallowed and then everything disappeared, pulling you into the darkness again.
~
The loud piercing sound of the device you prayed to every single day shook your entire body. You jolted up, realizing you were in bed and Felix was waking up next to you.
No fishes, no guts, no forest, no whispers.
100%! Congratulations and have a safe departure from our Village of Love!
"Village of love? More like village of horror." you said as Felix leaned in to look at the screen. A loud sound scared you again, a masked voice following after it.
"Thank you for participating in our program. You've proved your love to each other, built up devotion and trust in just a month. You are now the perfect match. We apologize for any discomfort you felt here and offer you The Juice of Oblivion so you may forget about the... less fun experiences you had here. You can choose not to drink the juice, but remember after you leave through the gate, you're obligated by law to not talk about our tests here. Enjoy the rest of your life together!"
You glanced at the night stand, seeing the suspicious blue liquid inside a bottle.
Felix suddenly started laughing next to you and you looked at him. Laughter bubbled up from your throat too and the two of you cackled for a good minute, until you were heaving for breath and wiping tears away.
"This was fucking insane." he said.
"Were you really stuck inside a fish?" you asked and Felix looked at you like you were insane.
"Was I what?"
"I had to gut a koi fish to get you out, in the forest." you explained and he shook his head.
"You were tripping. We both were, I figured that the moment I stepped foot on the pool. Like on the water. And you were under it, trying to get out but it was as if there was some kind of barrier keeping me from you. I had to find a spot to pull you out. The amount of anguish it gave me..." Felix licked at his dry lips and you reached out to grab his hand.
"Do you wanna drink the juice?" you asked.
"I just wanna get the hell out of here." he said and you agreed.
You were pretty sure this was illegal, all of the stuff happening here; them not disclosing the use of psychedelic stimulants or whatever the drugs were in the contract was also illegal.
But at the same time, if you never participated, maybe you would've never met Felix.
"What are you thinking about?" he asked as you approached the gate with a few other couples, including Gina and Ethan.
"How I'm glad I met you. But I'm gonna need therapy." you said and Felix laughed.
"We'll go together. This is just the first day of the rest of our life." he smiled, kissing your forehead and squeezing your hand.
The man in the chair watched all the couples leave. His lips turned upwards into a smirk as he saw new cars approaching the village.
He wondered what kind of sick tests they had in store for the new inhabitants of the Village of Love?
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(taken from a post about AI)
speaking as someone who has had to grade virtually every kind of undergraduate assignment you can think of for the past six years (essays, labs, multiple choice tests, oral presentations, class participation, quizzes, field work assignments, etc), it is wild how out-of-touch-with-reality people’s perceptions of university grading schemes are. they are a mass standardised measurement used to prove the legitimacy of your degree, not how much you’ve learned. Those things aren’t completely unrelated to one another of course, but they are very different targets to meet. It is standard practice for professors to have a very clear idea of what the grade distribution for their classes are before each semester begins, and tenure-track assessments (at least some of the ones I’ve seen) are partially judged on a professors classes’ grade distributions - handing out too many A’s is considered a bad thing because it inflates student GPAs relative to other departments, faculties, and universities, and makes classes “too easy,” ie, reduces the legitimate of the degree they earn. I have been instructed many times by professors to grade easier or harder throughout the term to meet those target averages, because those targets are the expected distribution of grades in a standardised educational setting. It is standard practice for teaching assistants to report their grade averages to one another to make sure grade distributions are consistent. there’s a reason profs sometimes curve grades if the class tanks an assignment or test, and it’s generally not because they’re being nice!
this is why AI and chatgpt so quickly expanded into academia - it’s not because this new generation is the laziest, stupidest, most illiterate batch of teenagers the world has ever seen (what an original observation you’ve made there!), it’s because education has a mass standard data format that is very easily replicable by programs trained on, yanno, large volumes of data. And sure the essays generated by chatgpt are vacuous, uncompelling, and full of factual errors, but again, speaking as someone who has graded thousands of essays written by undergrads, that’s not exactly a new phenomenon lol
I think if you want to be productively angry at ChatGPT/AI usage in academia (I saw a recent post complaining that people were using it to write emails of all things, as if emails are some sacred form of communication), your anger needs to be directed at how easily automated many undergraduate assignments are. Or maybe your professors calculating in advance that the class average will be 72% is the single best way to run a university! Who knows. But part of the emotional stakes in this that I think are hard for people to admit to, much less let go of, is that AI reveals how rote, meaningless, and silly a lot of university education is - you are not a special little genius who is better than everyone else for having a Bachelor’s degree, you have succeeded in moving through standardised post-secondary education. This is part of the reason why disabled people are systematically barred from education, because disability accommodations require a break from this standardised format, and that means disabled people are framed as lazy cheaters who “get more time and help than everyone else.” If an AI can spit out a C+ undergraduate essay, that of course threatens your sense of superiority, and we can’t have that, can we?
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james buchanan ‘bucky’ barnes
masterlist • marvel • 04/25/25
˚‧⁺ ・ ˖ · ୨ৎ recs five
one two three four

𑣲 how to impress a 21st century girl I @brunchable
Sam had forced Bucky to use Tinder to solve his abysmal love life. Bucky tells himself that if third time isn't a charm, he will officially give up trying to find a partner.
𑣲 i don’t want you like a best friend pt2 I @/brunchable
Bucky can't decide if the universe loves him or hates him. Maybe it loves to hate him. Maybe it's mischievous. Because he’s in love. He’s madly, deeply, painfully in love with a girl that he knows he’ll never have. Because the heavens created arguably the most perfect creature in their repertoire, dangled you in front of him for his entire life, and chose to rip you away before he had the chance to tell you how he felt.
𑣲 the best worst day ever I @jobean12-blog
You're having a shit day but then you see a dog and things start looking up...
𑣲 game night I @mugglebornmarvelite
Steve’s mandatory game night takes a turn when you and Bucky are paired up.
𑣲 bleeding heart I @mournthebird
You're his assigned nurse.
𑣲 domestic ws / soldat hcs I @/mournthebird
𑣲 cold metal I @/mournthebird
Soldat's arm gets cold. You are the solution.
𑣲 shower suds I @/mournthebird
You give Soldat his first bath out of captivity.
𑣲 silver and garnet I @/mournthebird
Soldat hurts himself a lot.
𑣲 condition I @/mournthebird
Soldat refuses to sit down, you notice he's in pain.
𑣲 gentle hand I @/mournthebird
Soldat has a panic attack.
𑣲 stained I @/mournthebird
Soldat continues to have nightmares.
𑣲 apricot toast I @/mournthebird
Soldat doesn't understand care can be without price.
𑣲 knots I @/mournthebird
You help the soldier with some self care.
𑣲 honey girl I @violentdelightsandviolentends
The Universe shows you your soulmate when it feels like you need them most. When you least expect it, you're given yours - Bucky Barnes. Your Dad's best friend. You can try to refuse it all you like; but the Universe wants what it wants. There's no denying fate.
𑣲 bucky can’t stand you I @buckyalpine
𑣲 mob!bucky I @/buckyalpine
𑣲 easy I @jaggedamethyst
life with bucky is amazing…but it’s easy to feel like you’re not enough when your relationship is a secret.
𑣲 sugar and skin pt2 pt3 pt4 I @tteotlma
Bucky’s never been sure if normalcy is something he’s cut out for. But when he meets you—a baker with a pretty smile—he starts to think maybe he could try.
𑣲 toy soldier pt2 pt3 pt4 pt5 pt6 pt7 I @vunblr
She had been the tool Hydra used to keep him operational; he, the weapon manipulated by their tendrils to execute their ambitions. Years after breaking free, fate Sam Wilson brings them together once more. Now, they must navigate the challenges of forging a connection beyond the twisted dynamic that once bound them in the past.
𑣲 to mend a soldier I @/vunblr
Pressed by a worried Sam, Bucky reluctantly agrees to try an alternative -and, if you ask him, weird- therapy program: rent-a-mom. What starts as an obligation soon turns into something far more meaningful than he ever expected.
𑣲 what if…? I @/vunblr
Bucky navigates his insecurities and guilt from his past as he grows closer to his new neighbor, a nurse.
𑣲 roots and branches pt2 pt3 pt4 I @/vunblr
Bucky has built a quiet life in the woods, content to keep the world at arm's length. But when a new neighbor moves to town, her presence ignites emotions he’s hesitant to face.
𑣲 foundations pt2 pt3 pt4 pt5 pt6 pt7 I @/vunblr
Bucky is doing his best to build a stable life for his newfound son, rescued from the guts of a Hydra facility. As he struggles with unexpected fatherhood and his own circumstances, he meets someone who slowly becomes part of their lives, establishing a connection he never saw coming.
𑣲 plump and ripe I @/vunblr
On a routine visit to the fruit shop, Bucky ends up with more than his usual goodies.
𑣲 built to last I @/vunblr
Bucky took up carpentry to keep himself busy, but didn't expect a hardware clerk to make him want more.
𑣲 touched starved I @mrsbuckybarnes1917
You accidentally walk in on Bucky touching himself when he thinks he is alone. Turns out he is thinking about you.
𑣲 a quiet escape I @thebarneschronicles
During a holiday stay at Clint Barton’s home, you’ve been desperately trying to steal a moment alone with Bucky—your super-soldier boyfriend—but the Avengers are constantly interrupting. Between Clint’s kids, Steve’s “bromantic” grocery runs, and Nat pulling Bucky into sparring sessions, it feels like you’re constantly fighting for his attention. Frustration finally boils over when you confront Bucky about your lack of privacy, only to discover he’s just as eager for some alone time as you are - and willing to do anything to get it.
𑣲 deny me I @drewbarymore
In which you feel like Bucky’s ashamed of you.
𑣲 dreamscape I @wkemeup
When Bucky falls under the spell of a Djinn, the line between fantasy and reality blurs. In order to survive, he must fight his way back to the real world - even if it costs him everything he's ever wanted.
𑣲 someone’s calling my name (and it sounds like you) I @mellowsaturns
after a mission gone wrong, bucky finds himself on the brink of unconsciousness and then you show up which causes him to reveal his true feelings
𑣲 mine I @cherrypickertheory
A new recruit joins the team, and gets a little too close to you for Bucky’s liking.
𑣲 dial tone I @atlaese
𑣲 lessons in lovemaking pt2 pt3 I @artficlly
You and Bucky Barnes go undercover as a married couple, but when a fake kiss gets too real, he unexpectedly finishes in his pants—leaving you both stunned.
𑣲 bitter I @/artficlly
Bucky doesn't do relationships, but maybe you'll be the one to change him
𑣲 his girls I @/artficlly
alpine barely tolerates anyone but bucky, so when she curls up in your lap without a second thought, the team is left reeling—especially when it leads to the not-so-subtle revelation that you and bucky have been sneaking around for months.
𑣲 loverboy I @thevillainswhore
Bucky, a lovesick, pining super soldier, vows to keep his feelings for you a secret — no matter how obvious his crush may seem. Those plans are ruined between a meddling Sam, an embarrassing fall, and a visit to the medbay with you.
𑣲 revenge sweeter than honey I @/thevillainswhore
When Bucky’s professor unfairly grades his college assignment, ruining his perfect GPA, he finds a way to get revenge — And doesn’t his sweet little wife look delicious?
𑣲 do i even have a chance? I @noceurous
you’ve found him and he was sure he didn’t have a chance
𑣲 b.b. boy I @bucky-bucket-barnes
Bucky and you have been friends ever since he arrived that rainy at the Compound. Silently pining, you’d hope he would pick on the numerous hints you dropped. It’s not until a small miscommunication happens that he confronts his feelings for you.
𑣲 hooked on you I @elysium-library
𑣲 which avenger are you destined to date I @marvelettesassemblenow
When Natasha found out about the Quiz which showed which Avenger you should date, the Avengers decided they all should take the test and go on these dates.
𑣲 your touch I @/marvelettesassemblenow
Bucky hadn’t been long at the compound when he noticed that others sought you out to calm down. So slowly he started too and had to figure out his feelings for you
𑣲 the catalyst I @aquaticmercy
In this universe, you and Bucky are happy. In other universes, it might not be that simple.
𑣲 jackass I @/aquaticmercy
Everyone is horrified that Bucky is flirting with a married woman, but then they realise there's a reason why.
𑣲 have we met before? I @/aquaticmercy
America Chavez says that you and Bucky are together in every universe.
𑣲 laryngitis I @skaye44
You're super talkative and your fellow agents tease you, but you don't care. You always chat up the quiet hunky super soldier who always manages to spend some time around you. One day when you can't talk due to an illness, Bucky gets concerned and seeks you out to make sure you're ok. He ends up talking to you for once.
𑣲 arm pat I @/skaye44
You go on a date with Bucky and hit it off, or so you think, but it ends weirdly. Nat steps in and gets other agents involved to send you flowers and gifts to get Bucky's attention and make him jealous for screwing up.
𑣲 stuck in the middle I @helaintoloki
you come home from work to find the last person on earth you want to see cooking dinner in your kitchen
𑣲 somethin’ stupid I @/helaintoloki
a drunken confession spoils a perfectly good evening
𑣲 everybody loves somebody I @/helaintoloki
Thrown into a blind date against his will, Bucky does his best to prepare in the days leading up to Saturday night, a feat that proves to be much more difficult than expected thanks to his neighbor across the hall.
𑣲 back to you I @/helaintoloki
Yelena’s interest in y/n forces Bucky to confront his feelings for her as the Thunderbolts take refuge in her home
𑣲 a favor I @/helaintoloki
you pretend to be Bucky’s girlfriend in order to help his campaign despite your very real feelings for him
𑣲 misunderstanding I @/helaintoloki
you accept Bucky’s invitation to attend Tony’s charity gala as his date, but your night quickly turns sour when you find out about his bet with Natasha
𑣲 40s!bucky I @/helaintoloki
after accidentally sending yourself back in time, you run into a younger version of the man you loathe only to find yourself questioning your feelings for him
𑣲 it’s been calling me I @godmadeaterribleerror
You've had these… dreams. Strange, realistic, detailed dreams of the same man, almost your whole life. But they're just dreams. You've been so sure, for so long, that they're just dreams. So sure, until you're not.
𑣲 the time thor third wheeled I @mercurial-chuckles
𑣲 option two I @nev3rfound
after nightmares continue to haunt his nights, bucky knows there’s one person left who could potentially provide some form of comfort, but is she still willing to see him after all this time?
𑣲 shut up I @fandoms-writings
𑣲 his only contact I @cjsinkythoughts
𑣲 the soldier and his mission I @magical-reid
When a trigger sends Bucky back into the grip of the Winter Soldier, he shadows you with an unyielding protectiveness that leaves the team on edge, though he doesn't harm anyone. After days of tension and careful steps, Bucky finally breaks through the icy barrier, returning to himself in a quiet, tender moment, finding solace in your presence.
𑣲 from one perfect moment pt2 I @yikesdrama
bucky’s birthday is coming up soon and you just want to do something special for him, maybe even take a time travelling trip to see his maa….
𑣲 the third wheel I @writing-for-marvel
When Bucky finally asks you out on a date, the last thing you expect is for his high school crush Connie to also have been invited.
𑣲 in too deep I @marvelstoriesepic
After Bucky calls, and you come running, you end up locked in his bathroom, trying to get rid of the evidence that something hasn’t gone well this time.
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𑣲 drabble I @bcksbarnes
𑣲 echos I @brokenbarnes
Bucky's worst nightmare comes true. You come back to him after taking a turn in Hydra's electric chair.

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i may have slept through my first class today and until noon, but it has been such a long day. it's 4pm.
#went from feeling confident and kinda having fun on an assignment to my professor leaving rude comments on it#had an appointment with my psychiatrist who made me feel really mentally ill#she said that she thinks i was discharged from residential too soon and she thinks the best thing for me right now is a residential program#she thinks what is need is not even a local program. she suggested like harvard's program because they're like the best#she understands that i want to stay at school though. she thinks i need a really structured program after iop#i'm starting a new med that i'm kinda scared about because we have to monitor things really carefully and i have to get blood work for it#she brought up ECT...i know it's supposed to help but it sounds scary and i think it causes like memory problems
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cognitive dissonance pt 1 - spencer reid


˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚ part two
who? tutor!spencer reid x student fem!reader
category: fluff, smut
content warnings: NSFW MDNI!! dry humping, fingering
word count: 5k
a/n: scheduled post as i am away at a new years music festival with my friends :] i will be back with you all in a few days <3
The first time you saw Spencer Reid was during a lecture hall mix-up in your second week at the university. You had rushed in, clutching your notebook and hoping to secure a spot before the professor started, only to find yourself in a room filled with students much older than you. At the center of it all, there he was—leaning casually against the podium, flipping through a worn-out book with an intensity that made the rest of the world blur around him.
He wasn’t the professor, but he might as well have been. His sharp, confident voice cut through the murmurs as he corrected an older man’s calculation on the whiteboard with such precision that the room seemed to collectively hold its breath. You’d learned his name that day from the whispers: Spencer Reid. The prodigy. The genius with more degrees than anyone knew what to do with.
From then on, he became a background character in your university life—a distant figure who seemed too brilliant, too out of reach, to exist in the same world as you. You heard the rumors, the awe-filled anecdotes: he’d started college as a child prodigy, aced every test like it was nothing, and was now juggling multiple Ph.D. programs.
Your own academic pursuits felt mundane in comparison. Sure, you worked hard, but you struggled. Like now, for instance, staring at the red marks slashing through your latest assignment—a problem set for your advanced statistics class.
“You’ve got potential, but you’re missing the fundamentals,” your professor said when you approached him after class, cheeks flaming with embarrassment. “I’m assigning you a tutor.”
“A tutor?” you echoed, your stomach dropping. Group study sessions were bad enough; working one-on-one with someone felt like an invitation for them to witness your shortcomings up close.
“Don’t worry,” he said with a knowing smile. “You’ll be in good hands. I’ve paired you with one of the best.”
You didn’t know what to expect as you walked into the library that afternoon, clutching your notes so tightly your knuckles turned white. The email from your professor had given you nothing but a time and a name: Spencer Reid.
Your heart raced as you reached the designated table tucked into a quiet corner of the library. There he was, surrounded by open books and a tower of index cards, his familiar mop of brown hair falling into his eyes as he scribbled something into a notebook. He looked up when you approached, his hazel eyes locking onto yours with an intensity that made you freeze in place.
“You’re here for tutoring?” he asked, his voice softer than you expected, though no less confident.
You nodded quickly, struggling to find your words. “Y-yeah, I’m… I’m Y/N. My professor said you’d be helping me with stats?”
A small smile tugged at the corner of his lips, and he gestured for you to sit. “Let’s get started, then.”
As you settled into the chair across from him, you couldn’t help but feel like you were stepping into another universe—one where Spencer Reid wasn’t just the untouchable genius you’d admired from afar but someone real, someone tangible, someone who, for the first time, was looking directly at you.
You weren’t sure what you expected Spencer Reid’s tutoring style to be, but it certainly wasn’t this. You’d assumed he might be aloof, perhaps brisk, throwing around jargon you’d struggle to keep up with. Instead, he was patient—meticulously breaking down concepts into manageable pieces while his pen skated effortlessly across his notebook.
Not that you could focus on much of it.
His presence was… distracting. The way his long fingers tapped thoughtfully against the edge of the table, the faint crease between his brows when he explained something particularly tricky, the way his lips pursed as he considered your answer before gently redirecting you to the correct one. All of it sent your mind spiraling into a whirlwind of thoughts that had nothing to do with statistics.
“Does that make sense?” Spencer asked, tilting his head as his hazel eyes searched yours.
You blinked, realizing too late that you hadn’t heard a single word of his explanation. Heat rushed to your face as you fumbled for a response. “Um, yeah! Totally. Makes sense.”
He raised an eyebrow, his lips twitching like he was fighting back a smile. “Really? Then can you explain why we divide by the square root of the sample size in this calculation?”
Panic flared in your chest. “Oh, uh… because it… balances the equation?” you ventured weakly.
Spencer set his pen down, leaning back slightly as he studied you. There was something disarming about the way he looked at you, like he could see straight through the flustered exterior you were so desperately trying to hold together. And, knowing Spencer Reid, he probably could.
“You’re nervous,” he said, not unkindly, but with the clinical precision of someone stating a fact.
Your breath hitched. “What? No, I’m fine!” you lied, your voice raising an octave.
He tilted his head, his gaze softening. “It’s okay,” he said gently. “A lot of people feel overwhelmed during one-on-one tutoring. It’s a different kind of pressure.”
You opened your mouth to protest, but the sincerity in his tone stopped you. He wasn’t mocking you or trying to make you feel small. If anything, he seemed… concerned.
“I just want to make sure you’re comfortable,” he continued, his voice almost soothing now. “Because if you’re too focused on feeling self-conscious, it’s going to be harder for you to process the material.”
You nodded, unable to find your voice. Spencer smiled—a small, reassuring curve of his lips—and slid his notebook closer to you.
“Let’s try this,” he said, switching tactics. “Instead of diving into the calculations right away, let’s talk about what you’re struggling with conceptually. No pressure, no judgment. Just a conversation.”
That did help, marginally. His calm demeanor and methodical approach were like a balm to your frazzled nerves. But every now and then, he’d catch you staring at him for a beat too long, your mind wandering to thoughts that had nothing to do with statistics. Each time, his gaze would flicker with amusement, like he knew exactly what was going through your head but was too polite to say anything.
By the time the session ended, your brain felt like it had been wrung out like a sponge—not just from the math but from the sheer effort of keeping yourself together in his presence. As you packed up your things, Spencer handed you a few pages of handwritten notes.
“These should help,” he said, his voice still as calm and steady as ever. “And if you have questions before our next session, feel free to email me.”
You nodded, clutching the notes like a lifeline. “Thanks. I’ll, um… I’ll do that.”
As you walked away, you could feel his eyes on you, warm and curious. And though you were mortified at how obvious your flustered state had been, a tiny part of you couldn’t help but hope he didn’t mind.
You were determined to be better this time. You’d spent hours poring over the notes Spencer had given you, even rewatching a few recorded lectures for good measure. If you couldn’t control the embarrassing way your brain short-circuited around him, the least you could do was come prepared.
But as you approached the table in the library’s corner and saw him already seated, legs crossed, pen twirling lazily between his fingers, you realized preparation could only take you so far. He looked up as you neared, his hazel eyes lighting up briefly in acknowledgment.
“Hi,” you managed, your voice sounding far too breathy for your liking.
“Hi,” he replied, a slight smile playing on his lips as he motioned for you to sit. “Ready to dive in?”
You nodded quickly, lowering yourself into the chair and flipping open your notebook. Spencer wasted no time launching into a review of last session’s material, but as he began sketching out a new problem, you felt your focus slipping again.
It wasn’t your fault, really. Who could concentrate with him looking like that? His hair was slightly messier than last time, a few stray curls brushing against his forehead. He chewed absentmindedly on the cap of his pen as he thought, the motion inexplicably captivating. And when he leaned forward to jot down a formula, the faint scent of his cologne hit you, warm and woodsy, leaving your thoughts spiraling once more.
“Did you catch that?” Spencer’s voice cut through your haze. You blinked, realizing you’d been staring—again.
“S-sorry. What?” you stammered, gripping your pen like it might anchor you to reality.
His lips quirked up, amusement flickering in his eyes. “I was asking if you understood why we’re using a t-distribution here instead of a z-distribution.”
“Oh! Uh… yes?” you said uncertainly.
Spencer chuckled, leaning back in his chair and folding his arms. “You’re lying.”
Your stomach dropped, and you immediately ducked your head, cheeks flaming. “I’m not lying,” you mumbled.
“You are,” he said, and though his tone was light, there was an unmistakable confidence in his words. “Your body language gave it away. You looked down and shifted in your chair when you answered, which is a pretty common tell.”
You groaned softly, mortified. “Okay, fine. I don’t know why we’re using it.”
“See? That’s progress.” He grinned, and you could swear there was a hint of mischief in his expression. “But I can’t help noticing that your attention seems… elsewhere.”
Your head snapped up at that, your wide eyes meeting his. “What? No! I’m paying attention.”
Spencer tilted his head, his smile widening slightly. “Really? Then why do you keep staring at me?”
Your heart practically stopped. “I’m not—I wasn’t—I mean—” The words tumbled out of your mouth in a flustered mess, and his grin only grew more pronounced.
“It’s fine,” he said smoothly, cutting off your babbling. “I just couldn’t help but notice. You’ve been doing it since last session.”
Your mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water. “I wasn’t staring,” you lied weakly.
His gaze held yours, unwavering and far too knowing. “You were,” he countered, his voice low and teasing now. “But I’m curious—why?”
“I wasn’t—” You stopped yourself, realizing you were only digging the hole deeper. “I’m just… thinking.”
“Thinking?” His eyebrows lifted slightly, the corner of his mouth twitching. “About the statistics, or something else?”
You wished the floor would open up and swallow you whole. “The statistics,” you said firmly, though your voice wavered.
Spencer let out a soft chuckle, the sound warm and almost smug. “If you say so.”
He leaned forward again, his elbows resting on the table, and you felt the air shift between you. “For what it’s worth,” he said, his tone softer now, “it’s not a bad thing. People observe things they find interesting.”
The words hung in the air, and you swore your pulse echoed in your ears. You couldn’t tell if he was being matter-of-fact or if there was a deeper implication in his statement, but the knowing glint in his eyes kept you from relaxing.
“Let’s try again,” he said after a beat, tapping his pen against the notebook and effortlessly shifting the conversation back to math. But the playful smirk that lingered on his face for the rest of the session made it clear: he wasn’t letting you off the hook that easily.
When you arrived at your usual table in the library, Spencer was already there, meticulously arranging his materials. His long fingers smoothed out the corner of a page in his notebook, and he glanced up as you approached, offering a small smile that made your stomach flutter despite your best efforts to stay composed.
“Hi,” you greeted softly, sliding into your seat.
“Hi,” he replied, his voice warm and low. “Ready to tackle some more statistics?”
You nodded, pulling out your notebook and pen. He scooted his chair slightly closer—not enough to be obvious, but enough that you could feel the faintest brush of his knee against yours under the table. You froze for a moment, unsure if it was intentional, but Spencer didn’t react.
“Okay,” he began, leaning toward you to sketch out a problem. As he wrote, his shoulder nudged yours lightly. The contact was brief, but it left your skin tingling.
“Let’s start with this,” he said, his pen gliding smoothly across the page. “We’re calculating confidence intervals today. Do you remember the formula from last time?”
You stared at the problem, willing yourself to focus, but the warmth of his proximity made it difficult. “Uh… I think so?”
“Let me jog your memory,” he said. His hand moved toward your notebook, his fingers brushing against yours as he adjusted it to face him. The touch was fleeting, but it sent a jolt through you.
“Sorry,” he said casually, his eyes flicking to yours for a moment. “Didn’t mean to invade your space.”
“No, it’s fine,” you replied quickly, your voice higher than usual. You tried to tell yourself it wasn’t a big deal, that the contact had been accidental. But then he leaned even closer, his arm grazing yours as he explained the formula.
“See how the standard error fits into this part?” he asked, his voice calm and steady.
You nodded, though you weren’t sure what you were agreeing to. It was impossible to concentrate with the way his sleeve brushed against yours, the subtle movement sending a ripple of awareness through you.
“Let’s work through this part together,” Spencer continued, his tone patient. He slid his hand over the notebook, his fingers brushing against yours again as he pointed to a specific number. The touch lingered just a fraction longer than necessary, but his expression remained neutral, as though he hadn’t noticed.
You couldn’t tell if he was doing it on purpose or if you were imagining things. Either way, the warmth radiating from him was making your thoughts hazy.
“You okay?” he asked suddenly, his head tilting slightly as he looked at you.
“Yeah! Totally fine,” you said quickly, though your face felt like it was on fire.
He smiled, his expression soft but unreadable. “Good. Let me know if I’m going too fast.”
You nodded, gripping your pen tightly to ground yourself. But Spencer didn’t make it easy. Every time he reached for the notebook or gestured toward your notes, his hand would brush against yours. Once, he leaned forward to grab a pen, his shoulder pressing lightly into yours for a moment that felt both casual and deliberate.
By the time the session was over, your nerves were shot. Spencer handed you a fresh set of notes, his fingers grazing yours yet again as he passed them over.
“These should help,” he said, his voice soft and steady. “You’re doing better than you think, by the way.”
“Thanks,” you murmured, clutching the notes to your chest.
“Same time next week?” he asked, his eyes lingering on you for a moment longer than usual.
You nodded, too flustered to say much else. As you walked away, you replayed the session in your mind, questioning every subtle touch, every quiet moment of proximity. Was it intentional, or were you imagining things?
The worst part was that you couldn’t tell—and that you didn’t really mind either way.
You weren’t sure why you’d agreed to have Spencer tutor you at your place. The library felt safer somehow, more neutral. But when he’d suggested it—citing the possibility of fewer distractions—you’d found yourself nodding without a second thought.
Now, as you sat across from him at your small dining table, you were second-guessing every decision that had led to this moment.
“Nice place,” Spencer said as he set his bag down and took in the cozy, slightly cluttered room. His eyes lingered on a stack of books by the couch. “Suits you.”
“Thanks,” you replied, fidgeting with your pen. “I, uh, wasn’t expecting company, so it’s kind of messy.”
He gave you a small smile, his gaze warm and easy. “It’s fine. Ready to get started?”
You nodded, grateful for the excuse to focus on something—anything—other than the fact that Spencer Reid, in all his impossibly distracting glory, was sitting in your home.
For the first few minutes, you managed to keep things professional. Spencer explained a complex concept with his usual precision, and you actually managed to follow along. But then he leaned closer, pointing out a detail in your notes, and you felt that now-familiar flutter in your chest.
“You’ve got the right idea,” he said, his voice low and steady. “You just need to be more precise here.”
He tapped the edge of the page, his hand brushing yours in the process. The contact was brief but enough to make your breath hitch.
“You okay?” he asked, glancing up at you with those impossibly perceptive eyes.
“Yeah, fine,” you said quickly, though your voice betrayed you.
Spencer’s lips quirked, but he didn’t comment. Instead, he shifted slightly, his knee brushing against yours under the table. It felt so casual, so natural, that you couldn’t decide if it was intentional.
For a while, he kept his focus on the notes, but his proximity seemed to grow with each passing moment. The air between you felt charged, like static electricity, and you could feel your resolve slipping.
“So,” Spencer said suddenly, leaning back in his chair and studying you with an intensity that made your pulse race, “how are you finding these sessions so far?”
“They’re good,” you said quickly, avoiding his gaze. “Really helpful.”
“Helpful,” he repeated, his voice laced with something you couldn’t quite place. “You sure about that?”
“Of course,” you replied, glancing up at him.
His eyes locked onto yours, and the weight of his gaze was almost too much to bear. “You seem… distracted sometimes.”
“I’m not distracted,” you said defensively, though the heat rising to your cheeks said otherwise.
Spencer leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. His voice dropped slightly, the teasing edge unmistakable. “Are you sure? Because I get the feeling you’ve been paying more attention to me than the math.”
Your stomach flipped, and you looked down, trying to steady your breathing. “That’s not true,” you muttered.
“Isn’t it?” he asked, his tone soft but insistent.
Before you could respond, he reached out, his fingers grazing yours as he took the pen from your hand. The movement was slow, deliberate, and it left your skin buzzing.
“Relax,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “I’m just helping.”
You swallowed hard, your heart pounding in your chest. He leaned closer, so close you could feel the warmth of his breath against your skin.
“Spencer…” you began, your voice shaky.
“Yes?” he murmured, his gaze flicking to your lips for the briefest of moments.
You couldn’t move, couldn’t think. The tension between you was palpable, and for a moment, it felt like the world had shrunk to just the two of you.
Spencer’s hand moved slightly, his fingers brushing against yours again. This time, the touch lingered, deliberate and unmistakable. “Tell me if I’m reading this wrong,” he said softly, his voice low and steady.
You opened your mouth to respond, but the words caught in your throat. Instead, you found yourself leaning ever so slightly toward him, your body betraying you before your mind could catch up.
That was all the confirmation he needed.
With a slow, careful movement, Spencer closed the distance between you, his hand resting lightly on yours as he tilted his head. The kiss, when it came, was soft and tentative, like he was giving you every opportunity to pull away.
But you didn’t.
Instead, you leaned into him, your heart pounding as you let yourself get lost in the moment. When he pulled back, his eyes searched yours, his expression a mix of curiosity and something deeper.
“Still distracted?” he asked, a small, teasing smile tugging at his lips.
Your heart thundered in your chest as his words hung in the air. You couldn’t decide if the heat coursing through you was from the kiss or the way he was looking at you—like you were the most fascinating puzzle he’d ever encountered.
“Very,” you admitted softly, your voice barely above a whisper.
His smile widened slightly, but it wasn’t the smug grin you expected. It was softer, almost tender, though his eyes still carried that flicker of mischief.
“Maybe we should take a break,” he murmured, his voice lower now, almost inviting.
You nodded, your breath catching as he stood and motioned toward the couch in the living room. You followed him, your nerves on edge but your body moving of its own accord.
The moment you sat down, the tension between you snapped like a rubber band. Spencer hesitated for a fraction of a second, as though giving you one last chance to stop him, before leaning in again.
This time, there was nothing tentative about it. His lips met yours with more certainty, his hand sliding up to cup your jaw as he deepened the kiss. You melted into him, your hands gripping the fabric of his shirt as the kiss grew more fervent.
Spencer shifted closer, his knee brushing against yours as his free hand settled on your waist. The pressure was light, grounding, but it sent a shiver down your spine all the same. His thumb traced a small, absent-minded circle against your side, and the simple motion made your thoughts scatter like leaves in the wind.
You tilted your head slightly, allowing him to angle the kiss more deeply. He responded immediately, his fingers threading into your hair as he pulled you closer. The world outside your apartment ceased to exist, leaving only the heat of his body and the intoxicating pull of his lips against yours.
When you finally broke apart, both of you were breathless. Spencer’s forehead rested lightly against yours, and you could feel the rapid rise and fall of his chest as he caught his breath.
“I think,” he said after a moment, his voice rougher than usual, “we’ve officially crossed into not studying territory.”
You laughed softly, your hands still clutching the front of his shirt. “You think?”
He chuckled, the sound low and warm, before leaning back just enough to meet your gaze. His fingers lingered on your waist, and the way he looked at you made your heart skip a beat.
“You’re full of surprises, you know,” he murmured, his thumb brushing against your cheek.
“Me?” you replied, raising an eyebrow. “You’re the one who—”
Before you could finish, he kissed you again, effectively silencing any protest. This time, it was slower, more deliberate, like he was savoring every second. You sighed against his lips, your hands sliding up to his shoulders as you gave in to the moment.
Spencer’s hands, steady but careful, slid down from your waist to rest on your hips. He shifted closer, and you felt the subtle press of his body against yours, his touch firm but never overwhelming. When his knee nudged between your legs, your breath hitched, the pressure sparking a warmth that spread through you like wildfire.
You froze for half a second, unsure if the movement had been intentional, but Spencer didn’t pull back. Instead, his lips moved against yours with more intent, and his hands tightened ever so slightly on your hips, guiding you just enough for the tension between you to crackle and deepen.
“Is this okay?” he murmured against your lips, his voice rough and low, sending a shiver down your spine.
“Yes,” you whispered, your hands gripping his shoulders more tightly as you let yourself lean into him.
Encouraged by your response, Spencer deepened the kiss, his knee pressing more firmly between your thighs. The sensation was maddeningly slow, his movements deliberate and measured as though he was testing every reaction. You gasped softly, and he swallowed the sound with a small, satisfied hum.
His hands slid up your sides, his thumbs brushing against your ribs just beneath the hem of your shirt. The touch was gentle, but the heat of his palms against your skin left you trembling.
He leaned closer, his breath warm against your ear as he murmured, “I’m going to ask you a question from one of our sessions. If you get it right, I’ll keep going. If you don’t…” His hands stilled against your skin, and he pulled back just enough to meet your eyes, his smirk growing. “Well, I’ll have to stop.”
Your mouth went dry. Was he serious? The challenge in his eyes told you he absolutely was.
“Spencer…” you started, your voice shaky with anticipation and a tinge of frustration.
“Hm?” he prompted, his hands sliding down slightly but remaining just beneath your shirt, a silent reminder of what was at stake. “What’s the formula for calculating a confidence interval?”
You stared at him, your mind scrambling to recall the formula you’d seen so many times in your notes. But all you could focus on was the way his fingers were still, waiting, as though they held the key to your ability to think.
“Um,” you began, your voice faltering. “It’s, uh, the mean… plus or minus… the critical value?”
Spencer’s smirk widened, his head tilting slightly as though he was considering your answer. “Close,” he said, his hands retreating slightly. “But not quite. Want to try again?”
“No, wait!” you exclaimed, your cheeks flushing as you tried to focus. “The mean plus or minus the critical value times the standard error?”
He hummed softly, his fingers resuming their slow circles. “There it is,” he said, his voice smooth as silk. “See? You can focus when you want to.”
Your heart pounded as his hands slid higher, his thumbs brushing dangerously close to the underside of your bra. The sensation was enough to make your breath hitch, but you barely had time to react before he spoke again.
“Next question,” he said, his tone taking on a slightly firmer edge. “What’s the first step in solving a regression problem?”
Your brain felt like it had been set on fire. How were you supposed to remember academic concepts when his hands were touching you like this?
“I—I think…” you stammered, biting your lip as you tried to focus. “The first step is… identifying the variables?”
Spencer’s brow lifted, his expression a mix of amusement and approval. “Good,” he said, his hands sliding back down to your waist. “But don’t forget to check your assumptions first. Details matter.”
You let out a soft whine of frustration, but the sound turned into a gasp as his knee pressed gently between your legs again, reigniting the fire building in your core.
“You’re doing well,” he murmured, his lips ghosting over your jaw as he spoke. “But I think you can do better.”
The challenge in his voice sent a shiver down your spine, and you felt your resolve crumbling under the weight of his attention.
“What’s the difference between Type I and Type II errors?” he asked, his tone almost clinical despite the heat radiating from him.
“Type I is… rejecting a true null hypothesis,” you managed, your voice shaky. “And Type II is failing to reject a false one.”
Spencer grinned, his lips brushing against the corner of your mouth. “Excellent,” he said softly. “You’re such a quick learner when you try.”
The praise made your heart race, warmth blooming in your chest as his words sank in. You barely had a chance to respond before his hand slid lower, resting on the bare skin just above the waistband of your pants.
“You deserve a reward,” he murmured, his voice low and smooth, sending a shiver down your spine.
“A reward?” you managed, your voice breathless and unsteady.
He chuckled softly, his lips moving to your neck, pressing a series of slow, deliberate kisses along the sensitive skin. “For all your hard work,” he murmured against your skin, his fingers toying with the elastic of your waistband. “Don’t you think you’ve earned it?”
Your only response was a soft, shaky nod, your hands gripping the fabric of his shirt as though it was the only thing keeping you grounded.
“Good girl,” he said, the words barely above a whisper, but they sent a jolt through your entire body.
His hand slipped beneath the fabric of your pants, his touch deliberate and teasing as he traced the edge of your panties. He paused for a moment, his lips ghosting over your ear as he murmured, “Tell me if you want me to stop.”
“I don’t,” you whispered, your voice trembling but filled with certainty.
That was all the permission he needed. His hand slipped lower, his fingers sliding beneath the fabric of your panties to find your most sensitive spot. The first touch was light, almost experimental, but it was enough to make you gasp softly, your body arching into him.
“That’s it,” Spencer murmured, his voice filled with quiet satisfaction. “You’re doing so well.”
His fingers moved in slow, deliberate circles, the pressure just enough to leave you trembling in his grasp. His other hand slid up to cup your jaw, tilting your head slightly so he could capture your lips in another searing kiss.
The contrast between his steady, controlled movements and the growing intensity of his kisses was intoxicating, leaving you completely at his mercy. He broke the kiss just long enough to study your face, his eyes dark with desire but filled with a surprising tenderness.
“Look at you,” he said softly, his thumb brushing against your cheek. “You’re so beautiful like this.”
The praise made your cheeks flush, but before you could respond, his fingers pressed more firmly against you, drawing a soft whimper from your lips.
“That’s my good girl,” he murmured, his lips brushing against yours in a featherlight kiss. “So responsive. So perfect.”
His words and touch combined left you completely undone, your thoughts scattering like leaves in the wind. All you could do was cling to him, your hands gripping his shoulders as he continued his slow, deliberate exploration.
˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
taglist: @opheliahotchner
#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid fic#spencer reid oneshot#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid smut#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid#criminal minds x reader#bau x reader#missarchive
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Back and Forth - Art Donaldson x Reader
A Stanford!Art Donaldson and Stanford!Reader fic :) Kinda slow burn, very soft very sweet.
Word Count: 3.9k
---
The California summer sun beamed down on the court, making the colors of the advertisements and signs around you appear almost neon. Upbeat music flowed through speakers that you couldn't quite place, embodying the feeling of the tennis matches that surrounded you, the back-and-forth beat pulsating through your head. It was almost overstimulating, but this was your normal.
You were pre-med at Stanford, volunteering at some local tennis camp to fill your summer and add fodder to your resume. You didn't do much, occasionally helping some rich, pompous kid stretch out their wrist, or their knee, or their ankle, or whatever. The days blurred together, they all spoke to you in the same condescending way. For most people, it would be mind-numbing.
But it was exhilarating. You had this intrinsic love for tennis, you always had. Perhaps it was that love that led you to signing up for this gig, and not the resume experience. But you would never admit that to anyone. You had played tennis for fun your whole life, with your family growing up, with your friends in high school. It was only when you shattered your wrist sophomore year that you had to stop.
It sucked. It sucked at the time, and it sucked now. You weren't professional-level at tennis, not like these people, but it was nice to have a hobby unlike anything else people expected you to do. The pre-med thing, the reading, the studying, it came naturally to you. And it wasn't like you didn't enjoy it, and it wasn't like you weren't good at it, but you loved tennis. And every now and again, you missed it.
So here you were. Your head followed all the heads in the crowd in a practiced, synchronized, subconscious back-and-forth. There wasn't really ever a crowd, the games at the program were often informal, the audience often consisted of coaches and other players. But this was a unique match, Stanford's players engaged in a captivating display of athleticism. It was almost like a dance, the way they seemed to know the moves of the other before they made them. You could feel the intensity from your tent by the end of the bleachers.
Stanford's star player (well, one of them)—Art Donaldson. You'd half-watched him play from your tent whenever you weren't working. He was elusive, but undoubtably one of the best there. You had never spoken. He was enigmatic, focused on his training and on helping others. He had perfect technique, people said. Now, you had the chance to really see how he was. And he was. Top of his game.
Usually.
The air was thick with humidity. Your gaze flickered between the players, boredom warring with the gnawing anxiety that always hummed beneath the surface during matches. Then, a sound sliced through the rhythmic thwack of the tennis balls—a sharp cry of pain.
Your head snapped left like a whip, your heart leaping into your throat. There, sprawled on the opposite side of the net, lay Art. His face was contorted in agony, one hand clutching his ankle at an unnatural angle. His racket lay a few feet away, as forgotten as the polite pleasantries that had filled the air before the match.
The shitty plastic chair beneath you creaked in protest as you scrambled to your feet. Ignoring the surprised yelp from the equally shitty excuse for a supervisor you'd been assigned for the summer tennis program, you sprinted across the court. Dust billowed in your wake, blurring the vision that was already swimming with a mix of dread and the adrenaline rush that always came with seeing someone hurt.
You skidded to a halt beside him, kneeling. His eyes, usually bright with playful competitiveness, were screwed shut, teeth clenched as he fought back a string of obscenities you knew all too well.
"Hey," you said, forcing your voice to remain calm despite the tremor running through your body. He flinched at the sound of your voice, a flicker of something akin to fear crossing his normally confident expression.
"Hey," he managed to rasp out, opening one eye a sliver. He tried to push himself up, but his face crumpled again as a fresh wave of agony shot through him.
"Don't move," you ordered, the calmness in your voice surprising even you. You reached out, gently placing a hand on his shoulder. His skin was slick with sweat, and you could practically feel the heat radiating from his injured ankle.
"'S bad, huh?" he breathed, a flicker of vulnerability in his voice.
The concern in his eyes sent a jolt through you. It wasn't just the pain; it was the fear.
"Don't worry," you said, your voice softer now, "We'll get you checked out. Just...hold still."
Ignoring the sting of sweat in your eyes, you carefully slipped your arm around his waist, offering what little support your slight frame could provide. Heaving him halfway onto your leg, you began the slow, agonizing walk towards the medical tent. Each step sent a spike of pain through Art's leg, reflected in the way he gritted his teeth and winced with every movement.
The supervisor, finally spurred into action, scurried behind you, muttering something about ice packs and paramedics. But your focus remained solely on Art, on getting him to help as quickly as possible.
You knew what it was like. Maybe that's what spurred your immediate action, your need to help him recover, to keep playing. You knew what it was like.
The antiseptic sting of the medical tent assaulted your nose as you hovered beside the injured player. Sweat beaded on his forehead, and he clenched his jaw with each prod from the trainer.
"Think they all saw that?" he finally rasped, a hint of amusement battling the pain in his voice. You blinked, surprised by his oddly timed humor.
"Doubt it," you played along, a small smile tugging at your lips. "'S not like you're Art Donaldson or anything."
A sheepish grin replaced his grimace. "Thank god."
The trainer finished his work, leaving you and the injured player alone in a tense silence. He cleared his throat, his gaze meeting yours for the first time.
"So," he began, trailing off as he stared into the ceiling of the tent. There was something in his expression, the physical pain, the fear that comes with injury, the odd quiet of an unfinished game.
"So," you mimicked, sitting next to him in another shitty chair.
Something hung in the air, something all too familiar to you. He turned his head to look at you, to make eye contact, keeping his body flat on the cot. You realized then how close you were. Close enough to see his eyes, the sharp point of his jawline, the strawberry blond of his curls.
You averted your gaze, looking out into the brightness of the tent entrance. The typical ambiance of the outside seemed to be drowned by the odd intimacy you'd created together, the silence between you and Art seemed to be the only noise you could hear. His shoddy breathing, despite his attempts to pretend he was okay, only brought you back to when you felt the same way he did, all those years ago.
A blush crept up your neck. You fumbled for something, anything, to break the charged silence in the tent. "I, uh, broke my wrist sophomore year," you blurted, surprised by the words leaving your lips. "Tennis, ironically. One minute I'm playing—probably terribly—and then I'm in the ER holding a bag of frozen peas. And, I don't know, I guess I'm just saying... I get it. Sort of."
"You trying to distract me?" he asked, a slight smile tugging at his lips.
"Yeah," you admitted, a hesitant smile mirroring his. "Is it working?"
"Yeah, actually," he conceded, leaning back on the cot. "Tell me more."
You felt a genuine laugh bubble up from your chest, the first since the moment you saw him crumpled on the court.
---
And that was really the last time you saw Art. Suffice to say you hadn't forgotten about the encounter. It was actually stupid, how often you thought of it. He didn't even know your name, but you remembered the timbre of his voice, the softness of his gaze.
In your defense, he was hard to avoid. Now that the spring semester had started, tennis season was in full swing. His picture was plastered around the most of the facilities you frequented, future NCAA champion Art Donaldson.
The scent of freshly cut grass and blooming jasmine hung heavy in the crisp California air as you hurried across the bustling Stanford campus. The semester had sprung with a vengeance, bringing with it the usual flurry of activity—overloaded backpacks, animated discussions about last night's party, and the ever-present anxiety of looming deadlines.
Today, however, an extra weight sat on your shoulders. Your pre-med advisor dropped a last-minute surprise: mandatory tutoring for a struggling athlete. Juggling med school coursework with a part-time job at the campus health center was already a tightrope walk, and adding this felt like a precarious extra step. But you managed it, as you did most things. How you had some semblance of a social life was a mystery. And maybe your very obvious lack of a love life was why you thought about Art so often. You didn't have time to psychoanalyze yourself, though. You barely had time for whatever this tutoring session was about to be.
Reaching the designated classroom, a small, windowless space usually reserved for last-minute group study sessions, you took a deep breath before pushing open the heavy door. The sterile light inside momentarily blinded you, but as your eyes adjusted, a sight unfolded that caused your breath to hitch in your throat. Sprawled across a cluttered table, papers piled haphazardly around him, was a man who you'd spent the better part of the last few months thinking about.
There, unmistakably, was Art. His signature strawberry blond hair, slightly longer than you remembered, covered with a backwards baseball cap, curled at the edges, framing his face. A deep furrow creased his brow, a testament to the frustration radiating from his hunched form as he focused on a massive biology textbook. An unsettling warmth bloomed in your chest, a reaction entirely too potent for a tutoring session.
The memory of him sprawled on the opposite side of the tennis court last summer, his ankle twisted at an unnatural angle, flickered across your mind. The panic that had gripped you then seemed almost comical now. The sterile environment and the way his eyes had held a curious blend of pain and something else—gratitude, maybe?—all formed a vivid memory you hadn't realized had imprinted itself so deeply.
His presence filled the small room, unexpectedly stealing your breath and injecting a jolt of something entirely different into the monotonous routine of your day. A shyness spread across your face, tinged with an unfamiliar nervousness as you cleared your throat, the sound echoing awkwardly in the sudden silence.
A slow smile took over his features as he looked at you, crinkling the corners of his eyes in a way that sent a shiver down your spine. For a moment, you were caught in that smile, a memory resurfacing from the hazy days of summer.
"Hey," he said softly, his voice warm. He reached a toned arm, pulling out a chair for you.
"Hi," you blinked, momentarily flustered by the gesture and the echo of familiarity in his voice. There was a moment of tension in the air, of uncertainty, of a strange sense of reconnection. Finally, you managed to force out the words, "How are you?"
"My ankle's a lot better now, if that's what you're asking," he replied with a playful glint in his eyes. His gaze lingered on you for a beat too long, making you hyperaware of the way your heart hammered against your ribs.
"You remember me?" you blurted out, the question leaving your lips before you could stop it.
"Course I remember you," he said, his voice laced with amusement. You couldn't ignore the way his eyes flickered from your face down to your body, and back up. Blatantly checking you out. And you could hear his smile in the way he spoke, warm and genuine, sending a familiar flutter through your stomach. The memory of his teasing laughter in the sterile medical tent resurfaced.
"Right," you replied, your voice barely above a whisper. You shifted in your chair, suddenly hyperaware of the weight of his gaze on you.
The next hour or so unfolded in a way that surprised you both. Art's initial confusion melted away as you hovered next to him, animatedly explaining each concept. Social life, love life, Art Donaldson, you couldn't explain. Biology, medical stuff, sports, you understood.
And he was beginning to as well. Time became a forgotten entity, measured only by the turning of pages and the occasional frustrated groan from Art. He wasn't the cocky athlete you'd half-imagined, but someone with a genuine curiosity about the world around him and some kind of depth hidden beneath his confident facade on the court.
Finally, Art leaned back in his chair, a satisfied smile playing on his lips. "We should probably call it," he declared, stretching his arms above his head with a satisfied groan. He thanked you, looking into your eyes as he said your name, the syllables dancing off his tongue in a way that made you feel like it was more than a word you had offhandedly mentioned to him.
"Yeah, sure," you replied, your voice softer than you intended.
The study sessions became a regular occurrence. The two of you exchanged numbers, only to arrange meetings, you reminded yourself.
But whenever he called, you found yourself talking about so much more than biology. It started with him asking how you were, a simple courtesy that somehow felt more genuine coming from him. Yet, as you replied, a comfortable ease would settle in. You'd find yourself laughing at inside jokes, dumb stories, the kind that wouldn't be particularly funny to anyone else, would mindlessly tumble out, fueled by the comfort you felt in his presence. It was a kind of nonsense, a space where you could just be yourself, and somehow, it felt like everything and nothing all at once.
---
Now, it was late, and it was finals week.
Papers and textbooks were scattered across your desk, a battlefield of scribbled notes and highlighted passages. You were in the trenches, neck-deep in the intricacies of biochemistry, desperately trying to cram information into your sleep-deprived brain.
Suddenly, the familiar buzz of your phone cut through the silence of your cramped dorm. You fished it out of your pocket, a flicker of annoyance battling with the ever-present hope that it might be a break, a distraction from the relentless onslaught of scientific jargon. Gratefulness shot through you when you saw Art Donaldson's name on the screen.
You answered the call. His voice crackled through the phone, laced with desperation. "I need your help," he blurted out, completely unlike his usual easygoing self. "What the fuck is molecular cell biology?"
You couldn't help but let out a small laugh. "In general?" you replied, already picturing the hours that it would take to explain the subject. Finals be damned, apparently.
"Can you just come over?" he groaned. "If you aren't doing anything."
You glanced back at the flashcards on your desk. "I'm not doing anything."
So here you were, knocking on the door of Art Donaldson's dorm. You heard rustling from the other side, making you wait just a beat longer in the dimly lit hallway. You rocked back and forth on your heels, chewing the inside of your cheek and rethinking your current appearance. The oversized Stanford hoodie, mess of your hair, and lack of makeup now seemed ill-fitting for a meeting with the boy who had somehow winded his way into becoming your crush. You felt like a kid again, back in high school.
You were starting to worry you had the wrong room until the door swung open, bathing the hallway in a golden, hazy light. There stood Art, moving his large frame out of the way to gesture you into his room with a short greeting and a "thank god." You didn't know what you expected, really, but there you were, slinking a little too closely past him as he stood in his doorframe. You felt his breath on the back of your neck as he stood behind you, guiding you to his tiny desk in the corner of the room. His hands ghosted over the small of your back, and you felt his warmth, despite him not actually touching you.
The room itself was small. It wasn't unlike yours, or any of the others on campus. But it somehow felt smaller with Art next to you, burying his face in his hands every time you patiently explained a concept you'd gone over already. His face. He was so close to you now, the quiet of the night and the room only making you feel closer.
The energy of this study session felt so different from all your others in the past. You weren't in a classroom, or meeting him after practice in the library. You were seeing another side of Art, the part of himself he didn't publicize. Every freckle, the stretch of his faded t-shirt over his body, the curls he brushed out of his eyes every now and again, the way he flexed his callused hands as he cracked his knuckles, a nervous fidget.
It felt like time slowed down. You labored over the biology textbook, finding practice questions and asking him some of your own. You were gentle, cautious. Maybe it was the weird intimacy of the moment, maybe it was the lack of air in the cramped dorm. Your voice was soft, and you couldn't help but notice how the tension Art held over the phone and when you entered the room melted away. Did you do that? You felt this reciprocation, possibly imagined. But whenever you cracked a dumb joke, he'd laugh and put a hand on your arm. The contact always made you freeze. The touch was a reminder he was real, he was tangible. Every fleeting gaze, every smile in your direction.
You had almost reached the end of the chapter, and Art was getting almost every practice question right. You fidgeted with a sheet of his messy notes, reading it over to continue some rant you were on about RNA.
"...made up of nucleotides, which are ribose sugars attached to nitrogenous bases and phosphate groups..." You trailed off, looking up from the papers only to find his gaze already on you. How long had he been looking at you? And the way he looked at you...
"Do you want to take a break?" He tilted his head.
You quirked an eyebrow, unable to fight your smile. "Sure."
He got up with an over-exaggerated sigh and stretched his arms over his head, exposing the bottom of his toned abdomen. For a moment. He reached under his desk, pulling out a box of some cheap canned beer. He popped the tab of a can, taking a long draw and passing it to you.
You looked away from his watchful eyes as you took a sip. Your face heated as you took into account the fact you were drinking from the same can he had.
You winced. "God, that tastes like ass."
"Sorry." He laughed, taking the can from you. Warm, callused fingertips brushing against yours.
"I didn't take you for a Steel Reserve kinda guy."
"What did you take me for?"
"I don't know. Gatorade?"
"Okay." He shook his head. "No more for you."
"Wait, wait, okay, I take it back."
He held out the can for you again.
"Mhm."
"Still taste like ass?"
"It tastes like what I imagine WD-40 tastes like."
You felt your heart swell as he laughed at that. You hadn't noticed how the two of you now sat impossibly closer, thighs brushing, shoulders sending sparks whenever they met. The half-empty can of beer felt like a nervous talisman being passed back and forth between you. Dumb jokes tumbled easily from your lips, punctuated by laughter that echoed weirdly loud in the quiet room. Finals week stress had completely evaporated, replaced by a warmth that had nothing to do with the shitty beer.
It was so easy, talking to Art. Easier than it should have been, considering you were explaining the intricacies of cellular respiration to a man who once thought mitochondria were a type of pasta. But he listened, truly listened, his eyes locked on yours. You caught yourself getting lost in their depths, a dizzying kaleidoscope that mirrored the nervousness in your stomach.
He leaned in, as if to hear you better, and you mimicked the movement unconsciously. The space between your faces shrunk, the air thick with unspoken words. His gaze did its familiar dance—right eye, lips, left eye—and this time, it lingered on your lips a beat too long.
A sudden self-consciousness washed over you. Should you pull back? This wasn't your intention. But before you could overthink it, Art's lips were hovering over yours, a question in the way they hovered, hesitant but hopeful.
"This okay?" His voice was impossibly low, breathy, quiet. His eyes raked over your features, eye contact shifting from left to right, back and forth. His hand, warm and calloused came up to cup your cheek, grounding you in the moment.
"Yeah." You breathed.
The kiss, when it came, was soft and unexpected. More of a tentative exploration than a passionate assault. It tasted of desperation and relief, of unspoken feelings finally finding a voice.
Your hands moved from your sides to toy with the curls on the back of his head, earning a barely audible groan from Art. His thumb brushed over your cheekbone, his other hand moving down to pull you impossibly closer by the small of your waist. His touch was shy, tender.
After what felt like forever (and you wouldn't have minded had it been), you pulled away slowly, breathless, a blush painting your face. His eyes searched yours for some unknown answer. For a long moment, the only sound was the ragged rhythm of your breath.
A slow smile spread across his face, mirroring the one blooming on yours. "God, you're so pretty."
Leaving Art's dorm room felt like navigating a dream. Your head spun, a mix of the cheap beer and the potent aftertaste of the kiss. Your lips still tingled where his had been, a brand new sensation that sent shivers dancing down your spine. Relief, sweet and unexpected, washed over you. Months of stolen glances, late-night calls disguised as study sessions, and a simmering tension that had threatened to consume you—all of it had culminated in that single, electrifying kiss.
As you walked down the quiet hallway, a giddy smile stretched across your face. It wasn't just the kiss itself, though that replayed in your mind in a loop—hesitant, searching, then deepening with a shared sense of discovery. It was the way he'd looked at you afterwards, his eyes soft with unspoken emotions, mirroring the whirlwind in your own chest. A nervous flutter remained in your stomach, a delicious mix of excitement and uncertainty.
But beneath it all, a quiet confidence bloomed. He felt it too. This wasn't just some fleeting moment, a stolen kiss in the dead of night. It was a turning point, a bridge crossed, and the future, once shrouded in the haze of exams and unspoken feelings, now shimmered with possibility.
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