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#Buy Old Facebook Accounts
Buy Old Facebook Accounts
Why Choose Old Facebook Accounts?
Established Credibility
Old Facebook accounts come with a built-in credibility factor. These accounts have a history of engagement, interactions, and connections, which lends legitimacy to your profile or business page. With an established account, you can instantly gain trust and credibility among your audience, making it easier to attract followers and expand your reach.
Instant Authority
Building a brand-new Facebook account from scratch can be a time-consuming process. With old Facebook accounts, you can skip the initial stages of building credibility and authority. You'll have access to an account with a pre-existing reputation, allowing you to establish yourself as an industry leader or influencer from day one.
Increased Visibility
Facebook's algorithms prioritize content from active and engaged accounts. By purchasing old Facebook accounts, you can take advantage of established algorithms and boost the visibility of your posts. With increased visibility, you can reach a larger audience, drive more traffic to your website, and generate leads more effectively.
Our Range of Old Facebook Accounts
Aged Profiles
Our aged profiles are meticulously curated to offer the highest level of authenticity and engagement. These accounts have been active for years, accumulating friends, followers, and interactions along the way. Whether you're a business looking to expand your reach or an individual aiming to enhance your personal brand, our aged profiles are the perfect choice.
Dormant Accounts
Dormant accounts may have been inactive for a period of time, but they still hold significant value. These accounts have a history of activity and engagement, making them ideal for revitalizing your social media presence. With a dormant account, you can breathe new life into your Facebook strategy and reconnect with your audience in a meaningful way.
Niche-Specific Profiles
Looking to target a specific audience or industry? Our niche-specific profiles are tailored to meet your unique requirements. Whether you're in fashion, technology, health, or any other niche, we have old Facebook accounts that align with your target demographic. With niche-specific profiles, you can tailor your content to resonate with your audience and drive meaningful engagement.
How It Works
Browse Our Inventory
Explore our inventory of old Facebook accounts and choose the one that best fits your needs. We offer a variety of profiles, including aged profiles, dormant accounts, and niche-specific profiles.
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Make a Purchase
Once you've selected the perfect account, simply make a purchase through our secure payment portal. We accept various payment methods for your convenience.
Receive Your Account
Upon completing your purchase, you'll receive login credentials for your chosen Facebook account. You can start using the account immediately to enhance your social media presence and achieve your marketing goals.
Why Trust Us?
Quality Assurance
We take pride in offering high-quality old Facebook accounts that meet the needs of our clients. Each account undergoes rigorous screening to ensure authenticity, credibility, and engagement.
Customer Satisfaction
Your satisfaction is our top priority. We strive to provide exceptional customer service and support at every step of the process. If you have any questions or concerns, our team is here to assist you.
Secure Transactions
We prioritize the security of your transactions and personal information. Our payment portal utilizes industry-standard encryption protocols to safeguard your data and ensure a seamless purchasing experience.
This comprehensive product description highlights the benefits of purchasing old Facebook accounts, the variety of accounts available, the purchasing process, and the reasons to trust the platform. It aims to inform potential customers and address any concerns they may have while showcasing the value of the service offered.
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usa5stareviewsa1 · 2 months
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Buy Facebook Accounts
Buy Facebook Accounts
In the rapidly evolving world of digital marketing, businesses continually seek innovative strategies to enhance their online presence and engagement. One such unconventional method that has gained attention is the practice of purchasing old Facebook accounts. This approach may seem like a quick fix to gain a significant foothold on one of the world’s most influential social media platforms, but it’s surrounded by a mix of controversy, practical benefits, and significant risks.
Old Facebook accounts are valued for their established histories and perceived authenticity, which can be a boon for businesses aiming to avoid the slow and rigorous process of building a social media presence from the ground up. These accounts often come with existing followers, which can provide an immediate audience to market products or services.
Moreover, the age of these accounts can confer a level of credibility and trust that new accounts simply cannot match initially, making them a seemingly attractive option for businesses looking to fast-track their digital strategy.
However, the practice of buying old Facebook accounts is not without its complications. It raises several ethical questions and legal concerns, particularly with respect to adherence to Facebook’s terms of service, which explicitly prohibits the sale and purchase of user accounts. Violations of these terms can lead to account suspensions or bans, thus potentially wasting investment and damaging the business’s reputation.
Furthermore, the effectiveness of using an old account depends significantly on the relevance of its followers to the new business’s market and the authenticity of the interactions it previously engaged in. There’s also the risk of inheriting any negative history associated with the account, such as penalties by Facebook or a tarnished reputation among its user base.
Given these factors, businesses looking to purchase Facebook accounts must weigh their desire for rapid growth against the potential for long-term setbacks. Understanding the risks and benefits thoroughly is crucial for any business considering this path as part of its social media strategy.
Difference between new Facebook account and old Facebook account
The primary difference between new and old Facebook accounts lies in their age and the subsequent impact this has on various aspects of their use and functionality on the platform. Here’s a detailed look at some of the key differences:
 Trust and Credibility
Old Account: An old Facebook account often carries more credibility among users because it has been active for a longer time. This can influence perceptions positively, making it appear more trustworthy. An established history with genuine interactions and content also supports this trust.
New Account: New accounts may struggle with trust issues initially as they lack historical data and the follower base that contributes to perceived authenticity.
Followers and Network
Old Account: Typically, an old account will have accumulated followers over time, providing a ready audience for posts and interactions. This can be particularly advantageous for businesses looking to quickly establish a presence.
New Account: A new account starts from scratch, meaning it has to build its follower base and network over time, which requires consistent effort and engagement strategies.
Features and Functionality
Old Account: Facebook sometimes rolls out new features and testing phases to established accounts first. Older accounts might also have access to features that are restricted to newer ones until certain criteria are met (like page verification or a minimum number of followers).
New Account: New accounts may not immediately have access to all features. Restrictions can apply until the account has proven its legitimacy and value to the community.
Risk of Penalties
Old Account: While an older account can be advantageous, it also runs the risk of having a history of penalties or violations that new managers might not be aware of immediately. These can affect the account’s reach and visibility.
New Account: New accounts start with a clean slate regarding Facebook’s policies and penalties, which means there are no hidden past activities that might impact its performance.
Algorithmic Familiarity
Old Account: Facebook’s algorithms are more familiar with older accounts, understanding their typical engagement patterns and content types. This can benefit the account by having a more predictable performance in how content is served to users.
New Account: It can take time for Facebook’s algorithms to learn and optimally interact with a new account. Initial engagement might be low as the algorithm determines the best audience for the account’s content.
Marketability
Old Account: An older account with a good reputation and consistent engagement history can be more marketable, attracting partnerships, sponsorships, and ad revenue opportunities.
New Account: Building marketability takes time for new accounts as they must prove their worth through growing engagement metrics and demonstrating effective reach and influence.
Why Purchasing an Facebook Account Could Be Beneficial for Your Business
Purchasing an old Facebook account might seem like an unconventional approach to bolstering your business’s digital presence, but it can offer several potential benefits. This strategy, while not without risks, can be particularly appealing for businesses looking to quickly establish a foothold on one of the world’s most popular social media platforms. Here’s why buying an old Facebook account could be advantageous for your business:
Immediate Access to a Broad Audience
An old Facebook account typically comes with an existing base of followers. This immediate access to a broad audience can be a significant advantage for new or rebranding businesses that need to communicate with a large number of users right away, skipping the slow and steady process of building followers from scratch.
Established Credibility
Old accounts have a history and potentially a track record of interactions and engagements, which can lend an air of credibility and authenticity that new accounts lack. Users are often more willing to engage with and follow an account that has been around for a while, as it appears more trustworthy.
Enhanced Organic Reach
Facebook’s algorithms often favor accounts with established engagement patterns. An old account with consistent historical engagement might benefit from better organic reach compared to a new account. This means your posts could potentially appear in more news feeds without the need for paid promotion.
Quicker Verification Process
Old accounts might find it easier to get verified if they haven’t been already. Verification adds a layer of authenticity to your business, making it more appealing to users and potential business partners.
Advanced Features Access
Sometimes, Facebook offers new features and tools to more established accounts first. Owning an old account could provide early access to innovative marketing tools and features that can be used to advance your business before they become available to newer accounts.
Time-Saving
Building a new Facebook presence takes time—not just to grow follower numbers, but also to establish a pattern of interaction, a recognizable style, and a tone of voice. An old account might already have these elements in place, allowing you to focus on adjusting the strategy to fit your business rather than starting from the ground up.
Potential for Better Insights
An older account will have a wealth of historical data that can be invaluable for analytics and strategy planning. Understanding past engagement trends can help shape more effective future campaigns.
Reasons for Buying an Old Facebook Account
Purchasing an old Facebook account can offer several advantages for businesses and individuals aiming to enhance their social media presence effectively and swiftly. An old account typically comes with a built-in audience, which means immediate reach to numerous followers. This is particularly beneficial for new businesses or rebranding efforts that require rapid visibility and engagement without the initial slow buildup phase.
These accounts are often seen as more credible and trustworthy. The longevity of an account can significantly impact user perceptions, potentially increasing the likelihood of engagement because users tend to trust established profiles over new ones. This established trust can be a critical factor in social media where authenticity plays a central role in user interactions.
Moreover, established accounts usually demonstrate higher engagement levels, such as more likes, comments, and shares. This increased activity is favored by Facebook’s algorithms, enhancing the visibility of posts and potentially leading to greater organic reach.
Another significant advantage is the avoidance of the “warm-up” phase that new accounts undergo. This phase involves gradually increasing activity to avoid triggering Facebook’s automated security measures, which can limit growth. An older account can typically engage in more robust activity right from the start.
Additionally, older Facebook accounts may have access to advanced features before newer accounts. Facebook often tests new tools and features with established accounts, providing them a competitive edge in utilizing the platform’s latest functionalities.
These accounts also come with historical data, offering valuable insights into past engagement trends and audience behaviors. Such insights can guide more informed marketing decisions and strategy adjustments.
From a marketability perspective, an older account with a solid track record can attract more lucrative partnerships and advertising opportunities. Brands and marketers often look for established platforms with a dedicated following to maximize their reach and impact.
While there are clear benefits to buying an old Facebook account, it is crucial to consider the ethical implications and potential risks involved, including the violation of Facebook’s terms of service. Understanding these factors will help in making a well-informed decision that aligns with both business goals and platform guidelines.
Benefits of Facebook account to grow your business
An old Facebook account can be a valuable asset for businesses aiming to grow their online presence more effectively. Such accounts come with an established audience base, which means immediate access to a group of users who may engage with your content right from the start. This immediate reach can accelerate the growth and visibility of a new business or a rebranding effort.
The credibility associated with an older account is another significant benefit. Users tend to view long-standing accounts as more trustworthy, which can enhance the perceived reliability of your business. This established trust is crucial for fostering lasting relationships with customers and enhancing brand loyalty.
High engagement levels are also a hallmark of older Facebook accounts, thanks to their history of interactions and possibly a larger follower count. High engagement increases the likelihood of your content appearing in user feeds, as Facebook’s algorithms prioritize active interactions. This enhanced visibility can lead to increased organic reach without the need for substantial advertising spend.
Having access to advanced features sooner is another advantage of using an older account. Facebook often grants new functionalities to established accounts first, providing them with innovative tools to engage audiences and manage content more effectively.
Moreover, an old account provides rich insights into audience behavior and engagement patterns, thanks to the accumulation of data over time. These insights are invaluable for crafting targeted marketing strategies that resonate with the audience, improving the efficiency of your social media efforts.
Additionally, bypassing the initial “warm-up” period required for new accounts can be a significant time-saver. New accounts typically undergo a phase where they must prove their legitimacy to Facebook’s algorithms, limiting their initial reach. An established account can post more freely, allowing for a more aggressive and immediate content strategy.
Lastly, an old account with a solid engagement record and reputable history is attractive to potential partners and advertisers. It opens up opportunities for sponsorships and collaborations, which are essential for business expansion and increased revenue.
While these advantages are compelling, it’s crucial to be aware of the potential risks and legal implications of acquiring an old Facebook account, including the possibility of violating Facebook’s terms of service. Businesses should consider these factors carefully to ensure their growth strategies align with ethical practices and platform guidelines.
Importance of old facebook account for fast business growth
An old Facebook account holds significant value for businesses aiming to achieve rapid growth in the digital landscape. Such accounts come pre-equipped with a built-in audience, which is a substantial advantage. This means that from the moment a business takes over an old account, it has immediate access to a group of users who are already engaged, eliminating the need for the time-consuming process of building an audience from scratch.
The established presence of an old account also enhances the business’s credibility and trustworthiness. Users tend to trust older accounts more than new ones because they have been active for a longer time, suggesting stability and a reliable history of interactions. This level of trust is crucial for attracting new customers and encouraging repeat business.
Moreover, these accounts often enjoy higher engagement rates due to their established histories. Facebook’s algorithms favor profiles and pages with consistent user interactions, so an older account with a track record of active engagement benefits from increased visibility. This can lead to organic growth, as higher engagement rates improve the likelihood of content appearing in more users’ feeds.
Having access to Facebook’s full features from day one is another critical advantage. Older accounts are typically granted access to new tools and features before newer accounts. These features, which might include advanced analytics or enhanced advertising capabilities, can provide a competitive edge, allowing for more sophisticated marketing strategies.
Additionally, the time efficiency gained by acquiring an old account cannot be understated. Businesses can bypass the initial phases of establishing trust and building a follower base, allowing them to focus immediately on strategic actions like market expansion, product promotions, and customer engagement.
Lastly, the marketability of an old account with a solid engagement history and a large follower base makes it an attractive partner for other businesses and advertisers. This appeal can lead to lucrative partnerships and collaborations, further accelerating business growth and expanding market reach.
While the advantages are clear, it’s important for businesses to proceed with caution and ensure that any acquisition of an old Facebook account is in compliance with Facebook’s policies to avoid any potential legal or ethical issues. This strategic approach can enable businesses to harness the full potential of social media for rapid and sustainable growth.
Considerations Before Buying an Old Facebook Account
Before purchasing an old Facebook account, several critical considerations must be taken into account to ensure that the decision aligns with both business objectives and ethical standards. Understanding the risks and benefits is essential to making an informed choice.
Compliance with Facebook’s Terms of Service: It’s paramount to recognize that buying or selling Facebook accounts violates Facebook’s terms of service. Engaging in such transactions can lead to the account being suspended or permanently banned. Businesses should consider the potential repercussions of acquiring an account in this manner, as it could lead to a loss of investment and damage to the business’s reputation.
Verification of Account Authenticity: Prospective buyers should thoroughly investigate the history of the account to ensure its legitimacy. This includes checking for genuine engagement, the quality and relevance of the followers, and the overall activity history. Accounts padded with fake followers or those involved in spammy activities can harm a business’s reputation and provide little to no value in terms of engagement.
Legal and Ethical Implications: Ethical considerations are crucial when acquiring an old Facebook account. The ethical stance of engaging in such a practice should be evaluated, as it could impact the brand’s image and customer trust. Legally, it’s important to ensure that all aspects of the purchase are transparent and do not infringe on any laws or regulations.
Potential for Inherited Problems: An old account may come with historical baggage, such as previous policy violations or a tarnished reputation among its follower base. These issues can be challenging to rectify and might affect future engagements and the effectiveness of the account in promoting the business.
Transitioning the Account: Changing the original tone and purpose of the account to match the new business’s objectives can be challenging. There is a risk that existing followers may not respond well to new management or a shift in content, which could lead to a loss of followers and reduced engagement.
Security Risks: Security is another significant concern. The account might be at risk of being reclaimed by the original owner or targeted by hackers, especially if proper security measures are not in place. Ensuring the account’s security settings are updated and securing ownership rights are crucial steps in the purchasing process.
Integration with Existing Marketing Strategies: The old account should seamlessly integrate into the existing marketing strategies of the business. There must be a clear plan on how to use this account to complement and enhance current marketing efforts rather than working against them or duplicating them.
Cost vs. Benefit Analysis: Finally, weigh the costs against the anticipated benefits. While an old account may offer quick access to a large number of followers and potentially higher engagement rates, the financial and reputational costs of acquiring such an account under questionable circumstances might outweigh these benefits.
Careful consideration of these factors will help in making a decision that is both strategically sound and aligned with the long-term goals and ethical standards of the business.
Considerations Before Buying an  Facebook Account
When contemplating the purchase of an old Facebook account, there are several crucial considerations to keep in mind to ensure that the decision aligns with legal standards, ethical practices, and the long-term goals of your business.
Adherence to Facebook’s Terms of Service: First and foremost, it’s important to understand that buying or selling Facebook accounts violates Facebook’s terms of service. Engaging in this activity can lead to the account being permanently banned or suspended. This can not only negate any potential benefits but also harm your business’s reputation.
Account Authenticity: Verifying the authenticity of the account is essential. It’s important to ensure that the account’s followers are genuine and that its engagement metrics are not inflated by bots or fake interactions. An account with a fabricated follower base will not provide the expected value and can lead to issues with Facebook’s authenticity guidelines.
Risk of Previous Violations: An old account may have a history of violations or issues that could impact its future use. Any penalties previously imposed on the account, such as reduced reach or temporary restrictions, could carry over and affect your marketing efforts.
Legal and Ethical Implications: From a legal perspective, owning and operating an account obtained through purchase may expose your business to liabilities. Ethically, the practice of buying an account can be seen as deceptive by customers and business partners, potentially damaging trust and credibility.
Integration with Existing Marketing Strategy: Consider how well the existing follower base and the type of content previously posted on the account align with your current marketing strategy. Mismatched content and audience expectations can lead to poor engagement and follower drop-off.
Security Concerns: Ensure the account is free from security risks such as previous breaches or compromised information. It’s crucial to have all necessary security measures in place, such as updated passwords and secure access protocols, to protect the account from unauthorized access.
Cost vs. Benefit Analysis: Evaluate whether the cost of purchasing an old account will yield sufficient benefits in terms of saved time, increased reach, and other factors. Sometimes, investing in organic growth or paid advertising might offer a better return on investment without the associated risks.
Potential for Future Growth: Assess whether the account has room for growth and expansion under your management. An account that is already highly specialized or has a narrowly defined audience might not offer much flexibility for pivoting or expanding to new markets.
Considering these factors thoroughly will help ensure that your decision to purchase an old Facebook account is well-informed and aligns with both your immediate needs and long-term business objectives. It’s often beneficial to explore alternative ways to build a Facebook presence that comply with the platform’s guidelines and foster genuine customer relationships.
In conclusion, while the allure of purchasing an old Facebook account might seem tempting due to the immediate access to an established audience and enhanced credibility, it is crucial to approach this strategy with a high degree of caution and thorough consideration. The legal, ethical, and operational risks associated with this practice can often outweigh the potential benefits.
Firstly, the violation of Facebook’s terms of service is a significant deterrent, as it not only poses a risk of account suspension or ban but also invites potential legal challenges that could harm your business’s reputation and operations. The ethical implications of deceiving customers with a bought presence can further erode trust and integrity, which are cornerstone values for any successful business.
Moreover, the practical aspects of acquiring an old account—such as the authenticity of its followers, the relevance of its engagement, and the potential for hidden violations or security issues—require meticulous verification and can complicate the integration of the account into your existing marketing strategy. The initial advantages might seem promising, but the ongoing challenges and adjustments needed to align the account with your business objectives can be considerable.
Additionally, the financial aspect of purchasing an old account should not be overlooked. It involves not only the initial cost but also the potential ongoing investment required to rectify issues, secure the account, and adapt it to suit new purposes. Often, building a new account organically or enhancing an existing one through targeted advertising and genuine engagement strategies might offer a more sustainable and cost-effective approach.
Therefore, businesses should carefully evaluate their ability to achieve growth through more traditional and compliant methods before considering the purchase of an old Facebook account. Investing in organic growth, leveraging paid advertising options, and engaging in authentic interactions with customers are proven strategies that not only abide by social media policies but also build lasting loyalty and trust with audiences.
Ultimately, the decision to purchase an old Facebook account should not be taken lightly. A comprehensive assessment of all risks, costs, and potential benefits should guide any actions. For many businesses, focusing on ethical practices and sustainable growth will prove to be the most beneficial strategy in the long run, ensuring compliance, brand integrity, and genuine customer relationships
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torikuzzaman · 6 months
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reminiscingtonight · 23 days
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Tech Support
Alexia Putellas & Putellas!Reader (Jana Fernández x Putellas!Reader)
Word Count: 1.2k
[WOSO Masterlist]
“So I am… supposed to click this?”
Alexia’s hand is swatted away at record speed before she can make contact with the screen.
“No, this one.”
Who would’ve thought. Captain of the country. Legend of your club. The La Reina may be feared by players worldwide, but even she could be beaten by something as simple as a new phone.
The two of you have been at this for a couple hours now.
When your sister first slid the box across the table at you, your eyes nearly bulged out of your head. You didn’t even have time to thank Alexia before she crushed your dreams right then and there. What you first thought was a present for you turned out to be a resigned plea for help.
As the resident tech genius you were high in demand. Last week it was setting up your mami’s tablet. Yesterday it was fixing Olga’s laptop. And today it seems to be Alexia’s turn.
Though now that you think about it, “genius” may be a stretch. It’s not until the third time you stop yourself from throwing Alexia’s phone at her that she lets it slip that Alba was actually her first call for help. It’s no surprise to hear that your middle sister was quick to refuse, given that the last time she helped Alexia set up a phone resulted in heated words and staunch refusal to speak to one another for two weeks.
Given that she’s your club captain the loss in communication is something you can’t risk, but you’ve always thought of yourself as gifted when it comes to technology. If you could teach your mami how to use facebook without spamming her personal page with posts about you and your sisters, surely helping Alexia transfer her data and set up a new phone would not be too hard of a challenge.
Oh how you’re wrong.
Though you’re only eight years younger than Alexia, she still manages to struggle as if she’s well into her nineties.
Ask if she’s backed up her data? Might as well have told her to recite the first fifteen digits of pi.
Ask if she’s taken note of the apps she needs to redownload? Might as well have asked if she knew the secret to happiness.
Tell her to grant certain apps permissions to her phone? Might as well have told her you were transferring to Real Madrid.
Ask her to re-sign back into her multitude of accounts? Might as well have asked her to transfer to Real Madrid.
If you had known just how teeth pulling this would be, you would have left Olga to deal with Alexia herself.
Despite your clear and well-informed instructions of what to click where, which settings to enable or disable, Alexia kept bulldozing through your words, thinking she knew better.
Spoiler, she did not.
Jana’s already been by to give you some words of encouragement, but after the fifth time you quietly asked if she could make up an excuse to drag you out, she hunkered down on a nearby couch with Olga. The two of them, traitors at heart, are having a blast watching some trashy reality tv show while you struggle away with Alexia.
At this point you’re one more question away from factory resetting Alexia’s new phone, but a promise from Olga to buy you lunch and a burning desire to prove to Alba that you’re a better teacher than she is leaves you clinging to the last piece of sanity you have.
After what seems like an eternity, Alexia finally sits back from where she’s been hunched over your shoulder, poking and prodding at her phone.
“I still don’t understand why I have to set up a passcode when I could just use my fingerprint to unlock everything.”
The only word capable of describing Alexia at this moment in time is brooding. Arms crossed, face drawn in a frown, your thirty-year-old sister is brooding over your insistence at setting a passcode.
You sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose. “What if you’re at training and you need Mapi to pull up something from your phone while your hands are busy?”
Alexia huffs, smile on her face as she thinks she’s got you. “Simple, I would never trust Maria with my phone!”
“Ale!” you groan. “That’s not the point.”
She’s not wrong. The last person to mistakenly trust the blonde haired woman with their unlocked phone received the device back with fifteen added stories to their instagram account. Though that was on the tamer side of what the defender was capable of, no one’s really let her borrow their phone since.
You catch Jana’s twinkling eyes over the back of the couch as she shares a giggle with Olga.
“Okay, what if I get hurt on the pitch and you’re too busy consoling me? I’m sure Jana would appreciate being able to use your phone to call mami to let her know I’ve been hurt.”
Alexia rolls her eyes. “First, Jana already has mami’s phone number. Pretty sure she likes your girlfriend more than the both of us.”
The number of times Eli has called you just to ask if Jana would be coming over for a family dinner would be insulting if you weren’t smitten with the idea of your girlfriend having fit right into your own family. Though the two of you haven’t officially been together long, years of friendship meant Eli was more than delighted when she found out the two of you were together. It also meant she was quick to catch Jana up on any and all family events she was hosting.
“Also, that’s not a problem because mami never misses one of our games so she’d already be there!”
It’s almost as if Olga can see the steam coming out of your ears. She’s quick to walk over, rubbing you back apologetically before throwing an arm around Alexia’s shoulder.
“Would you please set one for me, amor? Sometimes I misplace my phone and yours is closer.”
It’s maddening the way Alexia instantly starts nodding like a lovesick puppy. She plucks the phone right out of your hands, swiping until she can get to the right screen.
From over Alexia’s shoulder Olga gives you a wink.
With her girlfriend wrapped tightly around her, you take your cue to exit.
Jana opens her arms wide and you enter willingly. The older girl chuckles when you instantly bury your face against her stomach, arms tightening around her legs.
“I wanna go home,” you grumble, ignoring the way you can feel the vibrations of Jana’s laughter.
“Don’t you wanna stay for lunch?”
As much as you loathe the hours wasted on Alexia, the promise of free sushi did sound pretty good. All you have in your fridge is some leftover pasta from the night before, and you’re never one to pass up free food.
“Hermanita, what’s this I’m seeing about unlocking my phone with my face?”
You stiffen.
On second thought, leftovers didn’t sound too bad.
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wilwheaton · 2 years
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the scorpion doesn’t care who it stings
I posted this on my Facebook four days ago, and it seems to have taken on a life of its own for a minute.
I thought I’d repost it, here:
I can not fathom the emptiness, the insecurity, the insatiable need for attention and validation, the staggering arrogance, the malevolence and total void of human experience that is Elon Musk.
He's the richest man on the planet. You can't go anywhere or do anything without interacting with something he's part of in some way. There are literal millions of people who uncritically worship him, in spite of overwhelming evidence that he's a douchebag. Some number of them will come after me, as they come after anyone who points at their naked emperor. They'll spend entire days going after me and people like me, slavishly serving a man who does not even know they exist. They are his army of fools, uncritically serving his every whim. And it still isn't enough.
He can have any material thing he wants, and he will *never* be happy or satisfied. He has no real friends. Every single person around him is either a viper, a parasite, or both.
So what does he do? He bullies and threatens and harasses and trolls and behaves like the weak, scared, insecure child he has always been. That's a tragedy for him, but it's dangerous for us. He doesn't care what he destroys or who he hurts as he chases this existential thing he cannot ever have.
You know the saying "hurt people hurt people"? He's a hurt person who is hurting our society, making people I care about less safe. The consequences of this one man's midlife crisis are global, and that terrifies me.
In a comment, about an hour later, I added:
You know what's really interesting is the tiny number of people who are attacking and harassing me are either typical right wing idiots who all spew the same garbage from behind their wraparound sunglasses, or these weird nerds who are DESPERATE to justify how toxic and cruel and destructive Elon Musk is. Like, nerds, listen to Old Man Wheaton, please. 
Don't hitch your wagon to Elon Musk. There are countless people who are amazing and genuinely good, who do all the things we wish we could do. Stop defending this piece of shit who would push you into a volcano without even learning your name, if it would save him half a second on his way to his next shitpost on $8Chan (formerly known as Twitter).He doesn't stand up to anyone. He doesn't stand up FOR anyone. He is not your champion. He's angry and chaotic and destructive, and you have to understand that the scorpion doesn't care who it stings.
Finally, I want to add two things: 1) It’s interesting to me that a lot of the people who came to my post to be dicks used a lot of MAGA language. It reminds me of this thing my friend says about concerts: the audience looks like the band. Of course there’s substantial overlap between the angry, hateful, terrified, cowards who support Trump and the same who Stan Elon Musk, and it’s real interesting to see it in action.
2) I haven’t used Twitter for years. I quit before it was popular (lol) because it was better for my mental health. I logged in once when my book was published, and I deleted all my tweets when he announced he was buying Twitter. When he took over and immediately amplified a conspiracy theorist, I made my account private. In a perfect world, I would delete my account entirely. But I have to keep it for reasons I hope I don’t have to explain. After I posted this on Facebook, it made its way around Twitter (still is, four days later, which is ... a thing that is happening) and when people went to look at my account, they saw that it was closed. As much of a fucking manbaby Elon Musk clearly is, he didn’t do anything to my account. In fact, the only reason he even knows I exist (if he does) is through a vanity search of his name. I locked my account on my own, and so should you.
I am only on:
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Facebook (itswilwheaton)
Instagram (itswilwheaton)
and my blog that I’ve been neglecting for too long at wilwheaton.net.
I’ve had a Reddit account since 2006, predating user-created subs! I’m u/wil there.
Okay that’s all. Thanks for listening. Please choose to be kind.
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ladymirdan · 5 months
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So I typed up a long response with facts and lore snippets about how things change in the 40k universe all the time and was ready to post it as a response to a Facebook thread going insane about the new Woman Custode. But then I thought better of it and deleted it.
These people crying about it dont care about either lore or facts. They have their hate and misogyny and that is all that matters. They love to make others just as miserable as themselves and I refuse to engage in that.
Its like the old saying, “Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their leven and beat you with experience.
So what can we do that is actually constructive to meet these idiots? Do it with love, with happiness and joy. Trolls crack in the sunlight after all.
If you have a Facebook or Twitter account, go to the post and write how happy and excited you are about these releases. Show others they arent alone in wanting this. And of course, the bottom line, if you have the expendable money, buy the things you like.
And if someone responds negatively to your comment, just block them and move on. You won't miss them.
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cryptomiracle · 6 months
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more creepypasta headcanons
(+ marble hornets)
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WARNINGS:
Ooc? Idk
I started this at 2 am and you can tell
Cursing
I write on my phone so the format may be a little weird
Any brands, games, or characters mentioned in this do NOT belong to me, nor am I sponsored by them in any way.
This is very unserious, I've noticed that a lot of my other hcs usually take a "dark" turn and so I decided to make some that didn't.
You could even say they're a bit... silly.
You should totally check out my masterlist for more hcs (it's pinned)
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Characters: masky, hoodie, ticci toby, jeff the killer, and BEN DROWNED.
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Jeff:
he's extremely hard headed, he WILL argue/fight with someone over the dumbest things and he'll never stop arguing, even if he knows the other person is right.
He has an "emo accent"
He likes to start drama between people, and then leave the crime scene.
He is so ashy you could strike a match off of his elbow
He's been wearing the same beat up converse since 2012, them things are being held together by duct tape and a prayer.
His favorite animal is a raccoon, he says they're sneaky and nocturnal like him.
He refuses to get a new phone, he won't even steal one.
He curses all the time just cause he can, sometimes he'll even jumble random curse words together.
BEN:
He listens to vocaloid and he doesn't play about miku
He runs one of those "rage bait" accounts that are painfully obviously bait
Still quotes old memes and refuses to let them die
Example: yeet, t-posing, and "sanic the hedgehog"
He scams old people on Facebook and e-daters, he doesn't feel bad about it either.
He uses the money he gets from scamming to buy v-bucks and overwatch coins
He once doxxed someone for dissing miku
slender had to take away his mic privileges because he was keeping everyone up at night by yelling bloody murder at people on fortnite/overwatch
once showed up at someones house because they emoted on him after killing him in game
Toby:
He vapes, and thinks he's so cool cause he can do "vape tricks" and he makes people watch him while he does them
Someone once gave him apple cider, told him it was alcohol, and he pretended to be drunk.
His phone gallery is filled with random photos, like there'll be a low quality picture of a tree and then right beside it a picture of a ceiling. Just random stuff
Mint chocolate chip ice cream enjoyer
He's really flexible, although he has bad posture he can do back bends, the splits, etc
more on his terrible posture; when he sits he literally looks like this: ) )
When he first started working for slenderman, he REFUSED to live in the manor and lived outside. While he lived outside he became friends with a lot of the wildlife, slender eventually made him move into the manor because there was a rumor that toby was going to make a "possum army" and try to overthrow slender
He will fight anyone and anything he really doesn't care about his, or their well-being.
Had a "weeb" phase when he was in middle school and he still has nightmares about "naruto running" away from his bullies.
Hoodie:
He can make a killer sandwich (lol) he's not the best at cooking other things, but if you get him to make you a sandwich, he'll bless your taste buds.
He loves karaoke, he can't sing for shit but he still does it anyway
He acts like a millennial (I'm sorry) not to the point where it's completely unbearable, but he will send people "relatable memes" every now and then
He enjoys online arguments, he'll never participate but he will scroll through different threads of people arguing for hours on end
He likes for people to say stuff like "GO WHITE BOY GO" to him
He blushes when he lies, he's a scarily good liar but if you ever want to catch him in a lie, point out the fact that his cheeks are red.
Whenever he has a drink with a straw, he holds the straw in-between his tooth gap.
he sends streaks.
Masky:
He has a NASTYYY side eye, and sometimes he'll scrunch up his nose while side eyeing someone just to make it sting even more
Contemplated getting a mullet once, he never went through with it though.
He coughs like someone's grandfather who smoked three packs of cigarettes a day for 40 years
If someone says a word that reminds him lf a song he likes, it'll automatically get stuck in his head and he'll hum it all day after that.
he isn't weak when it comes to stinky smells, but if it's stinky enough to make him gag he's extremely overdramatic.
he learned how to sew because of how much he ripped his jeans, shirts, etc.
Sleeps so hard sometimes people think he's dead, he'll just be laying there looking casket ready but everyone is too scared to check on him cause he gets super grumpy when woken up.
he always keeps a little money hidden somewhere, even if it's just a 5 dollar bill.
he's superstitious, if he sees you attempt to walk under a ladder he will physically drag you back and make you walk around it.
he has a pair of brass knuckles which he only saves for "special occasions" they're his favorite things ever, he even named them.
he only uses his phone to call, text, or search something up, and that's it.
he doesn't even have YouTube installed.
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I will be reading over this to check for any errors, ty for reading - M
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sturnioz · 1 month
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ugh sorry for the double ask but like stalker!matt ideas are BREWINGG rn. just rewatched a bunch of timestamps in the video and i literally SQUEALED it is not funny.
stalker!matt i fear who is way too smart for u to realize what hes doing :/ got everything planned out and he just is soo careful with everything until he finally gets to bang you ?? lowkey steals ur panties but buys you the same exact pairs to replace so you don't notice. im sick i fear
you could literally send a hundred asks if you want idc
but whew yes.🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ stalker!matt is literally so careful and smart that its scary... follows you around wearing a hoodie and cap, a toothpick or gum in his mouth to chew on to distract himself from the urge to pounce already, hands in his pockets to constantly adjust himself whenever he's around you because fuck he just gets to hard even looking at you. knows everything abt you — family, friends, family friends, ex-friends, old relationships. has seen everything — your old facebook posts, the old instagram account you had because you forgotten your password and just made a new one, your twitter account, pictures that you're tagged in by others and so on.
idk if you've seen this but it's a korean stalker movie called 'unlocked' and the guy hacks into the main girls phone so he has all her pics, texts, recent calls etc etc — has a live feed when she goes on her phone and idc but thats stalker!matt (the version i have in my head anyway... sorry. im gonna go dark with it)
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jacarandaaaas · 4 months
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Any modern madrigals hcs?
ooh I love this ask!!
isabela loves supporting local farmers and florists! she even volunteers at a flower stall!!
luisa has a squishmallow collection that she’s very passionate about!
antonio loves roblox and animal crossing! he often plays with mirabel and camilo (both of them suck)
camilo plays on the local soccer team! he’s also head of the theatre club in school
julieta is a baker! she often donates her baked goods to charities in need <3
mirabel has her own etsy store where she sells embroidery, crochet, sewing etc she also participates in the art club!
dolores loves podcasts! she gets really immersed in them! I also feel she would love pinterest
pepa & felix met at a nightclub! pepa was so tipsy she started dancing on the bar and that’s the moment felix fell in love
felix is a stay at home dad! pepa runs her own business! (Im not sure what for yet)
agustín is really active on social media he mainly just posts 😄👍 under every post
alma loves facebook she posts the exact same selfie at the exact same angle every single time! one time camilo told her “hoes mad” was slang for whats up and alma actually captioned a selfie “hoes mad”
antonio and luisa visit the petting zoo on weekends
isabela is studying ecology
luisa is studying to be a physical education teacher
mirabel wants to major in fashion design
camilo wants to pursue performing arts!
dolores studies music! (or psychology)
bruno is a playwright!
bruno is basically like an old man! doesn’t use social media probably says “get off my lawn” a few times! and definitely sleep deprived
Has a soft spot for the madrigal grandkids!!
In contrast to bruno mirabel is VERY active on social media
Isabela has an Instagram account for plant of the week
camilo posts shitpost tiktoks and writes wattpad fanfiction
pepa and felix are super proud parents so any social media post is some form of “look at my baby!!!”
alma loves sudoku
isabela loves biology and finds it really interesting! she would often just tell people random plant facts (usually whoever is around most of the time it’s unfortunately mirabel)
luisa loves the sims and has a load of cc
mirabel is also in the theatre club
mirabel loves buying homemade earrings or making her own she also would have butterflies on everything
luisa loves barbie movies
Isabela loves hair dye
isabela also prefers books to movies as does dolores
alma STILL sucks at humor😭
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