#CRAYDL… I miss you… CRAYDL…

[bonemeal12]

i wish there was more CRAYDL in Impulse (1995). I need more CRAYDL in my life.

[cryptocism]

yoohoo, I just need you to know you've ruined my life✌️ /j but like. finished reading frequency, what three days ago now? and since the moment I put it down, I have been. directionless. listless. I am consumed by, not DESPAIR, because despair is too passionate a word but. dissatisfaction? I miss the life I lived while I was still reading it. which is honestly rather appropriate considering some of the themes in the fic. I miss the person I was when half of my mind existed in the realm of the au. I fear I may never get over it and I may never recover the life I once had before this fic ruined me for all others, but I also cannot bring myself to regret reading it even if I never feel satisfaction again. I have tasted ambrosia, and the bread and wine of men shall forever be ash upon my tongue. pay my therapy bill.

i know these asks were sent in july but i love them and want to immortalize before they get buried in my inbox

first of all thank you so much!!! frequency has been one of my favourite projects to do over the past couple years i love that ppl are so into this absurdly niche fic. (i cannot pay ur therapy u simply must reread it forever rip (i mean writing it was like 50/50 self-indulgence and catharsis which means maybe reading it does the same thing lmaoo))

second yes! yeah it was Six who changed the timeline. a big old theme, possibly the main theme, of the whole fic is about change and who gets to create it. Six mirrors Thad in the ways that he believes himself unworthy of importance, and that the capacity to create change is inherently barred from him because of who and what he is.

so it was really important that Six was the one to make the choice to try change things - the guy whos entire powerset relies on being as inconsequential as possible. it shatters the original timeline, it results in his death, it causes a lot of very bad ripple effects, but he also saves Nathaniel. who saves Jude. who together both save Thad - who saves Bart and CRAYDL and defeats Three and discovers his own capacity for change in the process.

that was sort of the point of the whole "the spectrum of change is a horizon, not a tower" litany. there's no hierarchy. anybody can go towards it, they just gotta choose where they're going.

Six doesn't really save the day, but by wrenching the prewritten tragedy off its course, he creates the opportunity for Thad & co. to save it themselves.

[dementedspeedster]

@nrth-wind [Bart] liked for a starter with Craydl!

The AI made of the neon-green goo-like substance twisted and writhed in his amorphous form as he was plugged into the laptop Thad had left for him to explore the web while he was left alone in his lab for a bit. Mostly the AI had been listening to the Rolling Stone's Emotional Rescue Album and catching up on all of the music he had missed in his time away from his speedster. That was until he had noticed he wasn't alone any longer.

>>Well, well, well, if it isn't the bossman's worse half!<<

Craydl called out to Bart as he unplugged himself from the laptop and propelled himself not unlike a slinky toward Bart. He stops short of the speedster, gathering himself and growing in size so not to appear like a pitiful puddle of goo in front of Thad's genetic source.

>>Whatcha think you're doing here? Bossman's not here. If he was he wouldn't be happy to see you.<<

He said certain of that fact before adding,

>>Last I heard the boss punched your ticket. Guess that didn't stick, huh?<<

[hippityhoppityyourenowmyproperty]

Reset!Rant (part 4)

Blackout

Chapter: 1

Thad: "Even though Craydl was programmed to obey my dear grandfather over me, he still could hold a conversation and be useful. While you have some rudimentary communicative abilities, it's not the same. I could say the same of Bart."

This is a put down that comes out of the blue and it shows how normal it has become for Thad to resort to insulting Bart. This insult is especially tasteless when you remember that a lot of ND people have problems with verbal communication/talk too fast/talk too loud or too quiet/have trouble expressing their thought and can go nonverbal. So yeah, basically another slice at Bart for having ADHD, wouldn't you know it.

Thad's vision blacked out and he grabbed the washing machine for stability. If felt as if the bottom fell out of his world. He knew this feeling all too well now, but it had never been as bad as this. He staggered away from the laundry and into the kitchen to sit.

.................................... Helen's voice echoed from the kitchen. "Thad? I just got a call from the school. Bart passed out in class and I'm going to pick him up. I'll be home soon." When Helen returned home with Bart, Thaddeus was waiting in the kitchen with a smirk on his face. "You passed out?" Bart scowled and stomped off to dump his backpack and jacket off on his bedroom floor. Thaddeus snorted, still sneering.

Making fun of someone because they showed physical weakness, that's stereotypical school yard bullying right there. "Haha look at you you loser! You passed out. You're such a weakling!" Thad is so...pathetic in this. He is so desperate for power, so desperate to be superior to Bart. He waited all this time in the kitchen just so that he could throw Bart this line. He clinges to everythign that will make him appear better than Bart. He obssessively seeks out every little one of his flaws and mistakes in order to maintain his big ego. It's almost pittyful. Of course he snots at Bart, of course he is behaving as condescending as possible. Thad is the kind of person who kicks someone who's already on the ground. This is just...So ugly to read. Hey Thad, you nearly passed out earlier this day, I don't see you shaming yourself for being weak. What's the difference? What's making you so special that you don't deserve to be shamed for it?

Hey Helen, you're just going to ignore Thad very obviously and viciously bullying the closest person you have to a son? You're not gonna repriment him for it so that he won't continue to destroy Bart's self esteem and his mental health? No? Great, it would be very confusing if you suddenly started being a responsible parent.

Thaddeus leaned against the doorway with crossed arms. "You're pathetic." He sneered.

Funny that you mention it, have you looked in the mirror lately?

Chapter: 2

Mike gestured to Bart's injuries. "You could say that you got hit in the face with a basketball or something." Bart slung the bag over his shoulder and pushed the bathroom door open. Maybe he could just go home? No, Thad was there, and he didn't want to listen to his evil twin berate him about getting bloodied in a fight.

Through his frequent put downs, Thad now made Bart afraid to show weakness. He knows that Thad will make fun of his vulnerability and won't be of any help to him.

Thad: "No moron, I'm playing with a tesseract puzzle." His voice was dripping with condescending sarcasm. "What else would I be doing?"

Another put down out of the blue. And a very sordid one, I might add.

Chapter: 3

A commotion in the backyard grabbed her attention and she saw Bart and Thad duking it out again. "Oh, for the love of...Wally, I'll call you back. The boys are really at it this time. I swear, Thad needs to get out of the house and get a life, and Bart needs to stop antagonizing him."

Hmm, that's odd. I could've sworn that Thad was the one who constantly ripped on Bart, was a dick to him and provoked Bart with "You've got ADHD so you're dumb" insults, and Bart was the one who remained friendly despite having to endure insult after insult without retailiating. Are you referring to the times Bart called Thad a jerk and said "Like you're any better"? Are those the oh so bad words Bart calls Thad that justify you saying "He's antagonizing him"? Because, and maybe that's just me, but calling someone who is neurodivergent a r*tard, moron, idiot, shortbus, brainless, annoying, destructive, a nuisance, hyperactive, embarrassing, dense, pathetic, saying that they have "Rudimentary communicative abilities", that they "probably got distracted with by something shiny" and implying over and over again that they're stupid and useless, that you see it as a disgrace to be related to them, that you'd like to beat them up, (and actually beating them up) and that they're inferior to you because of aspects of their personality they can't control is a bit worse than saying "Jerk" to defend yourself in response to being called those insults. And somehow we should believe that Bart is the one who is antagonizing Thad? What the fuck is wrong with you people? Thad is so obviously abusing Bart in this, I don't know how anyone couldn't see this. Screw Helen, she has no sense of fairness and justice when it comes to Bart's treatment. Do I have to explain the word favoritism? How come she lets Thad get away with was worse stuff? Why doesn't she chew him out for all the stuff he put Bart through? He was very clearly shaming him for having ADHD im Helen's presence, and she didn't do shit.

I'm 100% sure Thad started this conflict with some "You're inferior to me" comment and was also the one who got physical first.

Helen: "You don't even know?! Get in here and go to your rooms!" The boys let go of each other and sulked past Helen. "I swear you two, if you were girls, I would be blaming hormones for these outbursts."

Yeah, let's just casually ignore the fact that testosterones are the hormones that increase aggressive behavior and that boys produce about 16× more testosterone than girls, and that men are known to be quicker to express their anger through violence than women. (Cite: Men vs. Women: Hormones; a transgender perspective, Why do women and men respond differently to anger? PsychCentral) I guess I can add "sexist" to the list of things that make Helen an unlikable person. Also, glad to know that she now cares about breaking up a fight between them. Play fighting for fun in the yard? Absolutely not! What were you thinking? Why do you act like that? You should know better! Shady sparring fight in the streets? Sure Thad go ahead! Nothing wrong with beating up your brother to release your anger!

Chapter: 4

Thad answered with a smirk, "That you're a hyperactive brat who would just get more destructive when introduced to sizable amounts of caffeine."

Bart glowered and crossed his arms. "Shut up! I am not!" Thad lifted his chin in victory. "See? Hit the matk. I'm right."

Both Helen and Konner sit next to Bart and they say nothing in response.

Kon chuckled as Bart settled down at the table. "Man, I kinda missed that."

"Missed what?" Bart asked.

"You driving people nuts. Inertia's not Rob or Wondy but he flips out pretty fast." Thad snarled at Kon, "They don't have to live with him!"

Bart has been nothing but nice to Thad. Bart is the one who has to live with Thad's constant belittling. Thad has deluded himself into believing that he is the victim here, but he's really not. Bart is. Bart has been trying to help Thad, even though he was a total douchebag who constantly humiliated him. Bart has to live with Thad.

Chapter: 5

Kon: "Seriously, don't you have any other modes than "up yours" or "sideways"? You're going to die a lonely virgin life if you keep this up. Yeah, I get that your childhood was stolen by an evil madman and all, but you're preaching to the choir here. Dude, get over it. We did." Thad's glare darkened and he clenched his fist. Lunging forward with a punch, he stopped just short striking Kon. Shaking with fury, Thad backed away and left the kitchen. Bart sighed and leaned against the kitchen counter. "He's gonna need to spar today and I'm all beat up already."

"You don't have to be his punching back."

"I'm not a punching back. I hit back."

I agree with Kon up until the "just get over it" part. It's nice to see someone finally calling Thad out on his demanding and shitty attitude, but telling an abuse victim to "just get over it" isn't good advice, either. What Kon should have told him was that Thad should work on his behavior and that him having been abused doesn't make it okay for him to abuse others.

The dialoge after that between Kon and Bart is another attempt on the author's part of justifying this situation. The "I hit back" isn't very encouraging when you consider that Thad is a way better fighter than Bart. The "He needs to spar today and I'm all beat up already" makes it very clear that Bart would rather not participate in a duel, but does it anyway because he feels pressured to keep Thad's emotions in check. Without Bart sacrificing his own well being, Thad would've gotten himself into a lot of trouble by beating up random people in blind rage. And Bart knows this. Despite what this sentence is trying to make you belive, their fights aren't balanced. Thad can easily overpower and outsmart him in a duel. At the end of the day, Bart is still his punching back.

Chapter: 5

Seeking Thad out, Bart found him in the library, talking with a couple of upperclassmen girls. Bart pulled him aside, much to Thad's annoyance. "I'm gonna need some help. Eddie's-" "Not my problem," Thad interrupted. "I don't care what's going on." "Look, getting beat up was just the start of it. He's-" "Not. My. Problem." Thad turned away from Bart. "If he got himself into it, he can get himself out of it. This is a waste of my time." "I just want you to back me up."

This kind of sums up what kind of person Thad is. He takes and take but doesn't repay the favors. He's cold and has no compassion. It doesn't matter to him what Bart did for him, and that he vouched for him. And going by Thad's logic, Max and Bart shouldn't have offered Thad to stay with them because; If he got himself into this situation, he can get himself out of it! Not our problem, we don't care what's going on!

Thad knows that Bart is going to do something really dangerous and could get seriously injured or even die, and he still doesn't give a fuck. He hasn't learned to care for Bart one bit.

Bart grinned at him. "You came."

"Max wanted us to take care of each other," Thad remined. "Letting you get pounded into a smear is a violation of those orders."

This is Thad admitting that the only thing that made him help is Max. I'm 100% certain that Thad would've gladly stood by and watched Bart die if it wasn't for Max. Thad still hates Bart's guts for whatever reason, and he actively shows him that every chance he gets.

Chapter: 7

"Obviously, I got my intelligence from both of our grandfathers. Pity that means there wasn't any left for you."

Hey Thad? How about you shut up and not smack talk Bart every chance you get? It would make you less of a person that deserves to get hit multiple times in the teeth with a brick. This is, very obviously, another put down directed at Bart's ADHD that is disguised as a joke.

Jerking his head up, Bart nodded. "You would do that?" "What kind of evil twin do you think I am?" Thad huffed in mock offense. "I only beat you up and ridicule your intelligence, not withhold precious words of wisdom that can be thrown in Wally's face whenever he gets his tights in a wad about you not being the perfect little sidekick. He treated Bart to a wicked grin. Legacies are more than a name and a costume."

Oh don't worry Thad, you're not the evil clone, you're just the abusive, selfish, cold hearted, self entitled, manipulative, egotistical brother. Yes, you 'only' did those things. They are still reprehensible and loathsome. They will still mess up a person and are unforgivable. Turning your actions into a joke doesn't make them funny or acceptable. The fact that he admits to his wrongdoings but doesn't see them as reprehensible speaks volume about his personality. He talks about his crude actions with such satisfaction and confidence as if he were proud of them. After everything I read about Thad in this, it's very likely that he is.

And the reason why he does Bart a favor here? Again, just doing it for himself. He tells Bart these things not becaus he likes Bart, but becaus he dislikes Wally for that whole legacy thing and wants him to suffer. Thad is self projecting about his issues with his legacy.

[duke-nitro]

Mercury Falling AU: Part 7: #%@$!

(Also on ao3!)

Thad is 100% sure he's going to ace this essay on the French Revolution. That doesn't stop him from reading and re-reading it the entire bus ride to school, though.

After he's re-read it around 50 times, he takes a quick look around the bus and he sees Bart sitting next to Carol and Preston in the row opposite, trying to write his essay as fast as he can without tearing the paper or setting on fire. It is, at best, barely legible. He goes back to reviewing his essay.

When the bus reaches the school Thad makes sure he's the first one off the bus and first inside, which he does every day, so that he can minimize the amount of people he has to be in close proximity with. Hell, the only people he really talks to are teachers and the theater club, and that's just because he has to.

He gets to the classroom before the teacher is even ready and sits down, ready to blow everyone away with his essay.

For the last few weeks Max hasn't successfully meditated even once. He's "fallen asleep" every time he's tried. This sudden narcolepsy is rather worrying considering last month's medical crisis, but Max doesn't mention it in hopes that it will just pass. Well, that and he doesn't want to stress everybody out, especially not when everything is finally starting to calm down.

But today, Bart and Thad have just left for school and Helen is going to be at work all day, so Max is going to take the opportunity to try and meditate non-stop, and if he falls asleep he'll try again when he wakes up.

He realizes that this is probably a very bad idea, but he figures that if he manages to succeed just once, he can figure out and solve the problem before anyone else notices.

"Class, I hope you remembered to do your essa-" Thad stands up so suddenly his chair just about falls over, but a super-quick move prevents that embarrassment. He walks over to the front of the class just a little too fast to be normal.

The teacher looks at him quizzically and says "As I was about to say, I hope you did your essays, but if you haven't finished them yet, you can either finish them or review them to make sure you're actually done with them during recess."

Thad decides take this opportunity to reread his essay few more dozen times, just to make sure it's perfect. Around his tenth readthrough, he feels someone lean over his shoulder. His immediate instinct is to stab whoever just dared to violate his personal space. However, he doesn't have anything sharp within arms reach, so he decides to punch them instead.

Then he hears "So, did you finish this shitty assignment?"

Suddenly, all the fury in him disappears. Now, the only thing on his mind is a burning question, and after momentarily wrestling with himself, he turns to the boy with the eyepatch and asks:

"What does that word mean?"

Eyepatch Boy gives him a confused look and responds "Which word?"

"Shitty", Thad replies matter-of-factly.

"S-seriously?"

"Yes."

"Do you know any swears?"

Thad, starting to get more than a bit frustrated that he's not just saying what it means and wasting his time, snaps "Just tell me what it means already!"

Eyepatch Boy jumps a little at the outburst and says "Jeez, give me a minute!" and takes a moment to close his eyes and think. During that moment, Thad almost decides to take a millisecond to go get a dictionary, but Max and Helen do keep telling him to socialize more, and, not wanting to disappoint them, chooses to wait.

Eyepatch Boy snaps his eyes open and looks at Thad with a gleam in his eye that, if he could read people to any degree, Thad would recognize as pure mischief.

"Alright," Eyepatch Boy says confidently as he plops onto the bench next to Thad, "so there's shit, damn, ass, bitch, to name a few."

Thad gets lost in thought for a moment, silently berating himself for not knowing such simple-sounding words. Then he is consumed by need to learn, to fill in any cracks in his (vast, if you were to ask him) intellect, so that he can protect his ego from those embarrassing situations where he misses key words and responds to what he thinks they said.

Thad asks "Why did you call them swears?”

A vaguely malicious grin creeps across the other boy's face as he says "Because people swear by them, duh!"

Thad makes a mental note to drop his body into a whirlpool if he talks down to him liked that again.

Eyepatch Boy continues "You haven't heard them because they're fancy words, used only by the most distinguished people. Hell, most people have never even heard the words said out loud!"

At this point, Thad is starting to get suspicious, but he figures that of he was being lied to Craydl would start vibrating his watch at a frequency that signals "liar". Unfortunately for him, he grabbed the wrong one. The watch was made while he was impersonating Bart, and it was modelled to look exactly like Bart's, so that no one would ask where the new watch came from.

Meanwhile, Bart is starting to think his watch is broken. It's really hard to write an essay while your arm is about to get shaken off, so he puts it in his backpack.

"Alright class, step up and read your essays."

Thad doesn't need the prompt. In fact, he never even bothered to sit down.

He takes his place next to the desk and scans the room, looking at all the people whose lives he's sure he's going change with his essay.

He notices Eddie, who had introduced himself after helping Thad with all the different ways the words can be used. Eddie gives him a thumbs up.

Thad grins, clears his throat, does a short vocal exercise, takes a deep breath, and starts reading his rewritten essay.

The ringing of a phone startles Max from his meditation. He sighs and moves to pick up the phone, ready to tell yet another salesperson that he doesn't want what they're selling. He should really get around to asking the phone company to fix the caller ID.

He grabs the phone, but the caller starts talking before he can make a sound.

"Hello? Is this Maxwell Crandall?"

The voice on the other end of the line isn't a salesperson, surprisingly. It's a voice Max has unfortunately heard far too much of in the last year.

The school's principal, Edith Crimbleton.

He steels himself and says "Hello, Edith. What did Bart do this time?"

"It wasn't Bartholomew this time. It was your other child, Thaddeus."

Max facepalms and responds, somehow sounding more tired then when he was sick, "What happened?""

"Thaddeus started... started... spewing such horrible vulgarities!"

Max is startled by the sudden outburst. He's never heard her get this loud, not even after that time Bart accidentally lit his desk on fire.

He opens his mouth to speak, but Edith doesn't give him the chance.

"Then he committed pugilistic actions against his fellow classmates!"

Max bites back a curse. He just knows he'll never hear the end of this at the next PTA meeting.

"I'll be there as quick as I can."

When he gets there, the first thing he does is have a superspeed talk with Bart, who is trying to set his broken nose so that it doesn't heal weird.

"'kay, so Thad was reading his essay, right? And there was so much cursing! Like, every fourth word was a swear!"

Max's face contorts into the visual equivalent of an exasperated groan. He already doesn't know how he's going to talk Edith out of expelling Thad, and he hasn't even headed the whole story.

Bart continues "And everybody's laughing, 'cause it was hilarious. But Thad just looked pissed."

"Language, Bart."

"Whatever. Like I was saying, Thad looked angrier than I've ever seen him. Like, he was so red I thought he was gonna explode!", Bart says while fanning his arms out in an attempt to mime an explosion.

"Then he ran over and started whaling on Evil Eye!"

"That kid with the eyepatch?"

"Yeah. So I went over to pull him off, and he kicked me in the grifein' face!"

"Bart. Just because Thad was swearing doesn't mean you can."

Bart looks a lot more hurt by that than Max would have expected, but Bart continues recapping anyways.

"After that everything's kind of a blur. Thad stopped when the teacher yelled at him."

There is a moment of awkward silence after Bart trails off. Max gives him a hand motion that says "go on".

"Oh!" Bart exclaims. "That's it."

Max pinches the bridge of his nose and steels himself for the difficult talk ahead of him.

Forty-five minutes of intense negotiating later, Max finally manages to convince Edith to not outright expel Thad.

Thad does get a month's worth of detention, effective immediately.

Max decides to give him the "Don't try to beat the life out of your classmates" talk when he gets home.

Thad has never felt so ashamed. He should have known he was being tricked!

He looks around the detention hall and sees his deceiver, Evil Eye. Thad can see a black eye peeking out from under his eyepatch.

He wishes no one had stopped him from getting his vengeance.

Half an hour later, the teacher steps out for a moment and Thad hears a chair quickly move and quick footsteps coming towards him. He grips his pencil tight, ready to stab him if the first words out of his mouth aren't begging for an apology.

A hand slams down on his desk as Eddie loudly proclaims "I realize what I did was wrong, and I apologize." he extends his other hand and adds "Friends?", far too cheerily for Thad's taste.

Thad looks at his hand, then looks him dead in the eye and deadpans "You just want me to be your dumb muscle, don't you."

Eddie scoffs and says "What? No, of course not!"

Thad levels him with a glare that could peel paint. Eddie is completely unaffected by it, but he spills the beans the moment Thad starts to stand up.

"Okay, fine, you got me! But can you blame me? You have the quickest hands this side of Central City!"

Thad settles back down in his chair and retorts "I can and I will blame you, and if you try to trick me again you will regret it."

The threat, much like the glare, doesn't affect Eddie much. In fact, it doesn't even make Eddie miss a beat, as he immediately responds "Okay, okay, I get it, you're still mad."

An understatement, Thad thinks.

"But... I know a very good way to work it off."

Once it becomes clear that he won't say what it is until Thad responds, Thad sighs and begrudgingly says "Fine, I'll bite. What is it?"

"Do you wanna torch Herbie Hawke's car?"

Thad runs the name through his memory to see if he knows it. He doesn't. And, against his better judgement, he asks "Who?"

Eddie looks incredulous as he says "You don't know Herbie Hawke? The guy whose been campaigning for mayor since the last election? Two years ago?"

Now Thad knows he's being lied to. And he decides to voice that opinion.

"I'm insulted that you think I'm stupid enough to fall for that."

Eddie freezes, like he can't believe what he just heard. He then takes a single step to the side at points at the huge billboard across the street that has an image of a very pasty man on of and reads "HERBIE HAWKE FOR MAYOR".

Thad's not entirely sure if it's legal to put a political ad right next to a school.

In an attempt to hide his shame, Thad asks "And why should we?" in the most condescending tone he can manage.

'C'mon dude, just look at the guy!"

Thad glares at Eddie before taking a closer look at the billboard. There's not much to it, Thad thinks, just your average middle-aged, doughy, balding politician with an empty smile. What little hair he has left is brown, but it's only still that color due to the worst dye-job Thad has ever seen.

Then he looks into his eyes and a shiver runs down his spine. There is not a single drop of emotion behind them, the kind of eyes Thad could imagine on a serpent, one ready to strike the moment you turn your back on it.

While Thad is looking at the ad, Eddie begins to recite the laundry list of things that should bar Herbie from campaigning.

The list contains, but is not limited to: Drugrunning, blackmail, embezzling, attempting to rig an election, and at least one suspected murder.

Thad scrunches his nose up and asks "How do you know all that?"

Eddie chuckles and says "Both my dad and grandpa are career supervillains, so they know about a lot of the dirt that happens here."

Thad weighs his options; either ignore him and go about his day, or wreck some dirtbag's car in such a way he could easily make Eddie's death look like an accident. Only if Eddie betrays him, of course.

Thad thinks that this is maybe the easiest decision he's ever had to make in his life.

Around the time Max is wondering when Thad is going to get back, as he usually comes home the first moment physically can, the phone rings. Max prays to any god that will listen that it's not more bad news, and picks up the phone.

"Hello?"

Max immediately recognizes the voice as Thad's, and an extremely bland conversation follows, the end result of which is Thad telling Max that he's going to patrol for a bit before he comes back.

After he hangs up, Max goes to help Helen with dinner, more than a little bit glad that Thad is at least trying to make up for what he did.

It's not going to stop him from getting lectured later, though.

Thad hangs up the payphone, feeling far worse than he thought he would about the lie.

He sneaks back into the bush across the street from Herbie Hawkes' mcmansion, where he and Eddie are waiting for night to fall.

The wait is an arduous task, but they pass the time by talking about stuff like "What is the best way to pickpocket somebody" and "Where is the best place to hit someone and knock them out without causing lifelong injuries".

The fact that they're talking about committing crimes while waiting to commit a crime against someone for committing crimes is not lost on them.

It takes an hour for it to get dark enough so that they won't be seen. They creep across the street towards the car parked on the curb. As Eddie gets to work picking the lock, Thad starts to wonder why Herbie parked his car out here when, in his line of sight, he can see the three-car garage connected to his house.

Suddenly, just as Eddie gets the door open, Thad is nearly deafened by an alarm. He vibrates his hand through the hood of the car and breaks the alarm as fast as he can.

Then, silence follows.

Neither of them dare to even take a breath until they're sure the coast is clear. A whole minute later, after no response, they share a sigh of relief.

Then a door slams open.

Thad and Eddie scramble to get underneath the car and out of sight. They hear the door-slammer screaming "WHY WON'T YOU GOSHDARN HOOLIGANS LEAVE ME ALONE!?"

The distinctive sound of a shotgun cocking is almost drowned out by the door-slammer's rant continues "I SWEAR TO THE FATHER, THE SON, AND THE HOLY GHOST THAT IF I SEE ANY OF Y'ALL, I'LL SHOOT YER DANG HEADS OFF!"

He goes on and on like that for about ten minutes before Thad scoots forward to at least see what's happening, and what he sees is a middle-aged, doughy, balding man prowling the lawn with a shotgun, screaming at people who, under normal circumstances, would be miles away.

He is suddenly snapped out of his thoughts by the sound of Eddie hitting his head off the bottom of the car trying to get a peek at the action.

Both Thad and Herbie turn to the sound, Thad silently shushing, Herbie leveling his gun, poised to fire the moment he sees movement.

Thad would run away, but Eddie has a death grip on his leg. Normally this wouldn't stop him, but he found out that Eddie is Morlo's grandson when they were passing time, and he actually kinda likes Morlo so he doesn't want to get on his bad side.

Thad turns back to see Herbie creeping towards the car. It takes an agonizingly long time for him to get there, and when he does, Eddie looks like he's about to have a heart attack.

Just as Herbie starts to crouch a trashcan down the block falls over. Herbie breaks into a mad dash towards it, rounding the corner to chase the supposed vandal .

Thad and Eddie drag themselves out from underneath the car. Eddie pulls a bottle with an oily rag sticking out of it out of his jacket, prompting Thad to hiss "What are you doing!?" as Eddie yanks the rag out.

Eddie doesn't respond, instead opening the door and liberally emptying the contents of the bottle over the seats. Once the bottle is devoid of fluids, he hands the rag to Thad, who gives him a quizzical look as he produces a lighter and sets the rag aflame.

Thad immediately panics and throws it into the car, which instantly bursts into flame. Eddie belts out a victory whoop and runs away, Thad on his heels not a second later. They run and run and run until Eddie yells "Split!" and makes a sudden right turn down an alley. Thad figures this is the best time to go home and take a shower.

He has his hand on the doorknob when he realizes "Wait, cars have gas in them. Fire explodes gas."

Cue desperate sprint back to the car. It takes him less than 5 seconds to remove the gas tank and make a break for it, tank under his arm until he can find a place to property dispose of it.

On his way to the dump, he sees something that makes him screech to a halt. He so did not want or need to fight a supervillain today.

The villain in question is one Thad has never seen before, but he looks a character from those obscenely bloody movies Bart always watches, what with his massive physique, hockey mask, flannel shirt, and coveralls, not to mention that he's as silent as a tomb.

The only thing keeping him from that aesthetic is the fact that he is currently attempting to steal a monster truck with what appears to be tons of psychically controlled mud.

Thad hears a crackling sound behind him, so he takes a peek over his shoulder and freezes when he sees the fire that has been trailing him since he took the gas tank.

He looks at the tank. Then at the villain. Then back to the tank. Infinitely done with today and not willing to take the time to think of an alternative, he chucks the tank as hard as he can at the villain, who encases himself in a ball of mud to avoid harm.

The tank embeds in the mud, exploding when the fire catches up to it. Fortunately or unfortunately, depending on your viewpoint, Thad forgot to consider if the truck also had gas in it, so that explodes too, the shockwave flinging the mudball over the horizon.

Thad wipes the sweat from his brow and runs home again, this time actually managing to get inside.

He immediately feels a ball of shame and guilt form in his gut when he realizes he missed dinner. Who does that? Who shoves themselves into someone else's life then denies their hospitality?

Thad is interrupted from his downward spiral by a gruff voice saying "There's leftovers in the fridge."

Max walks past him and settles down on the couch, gesturing at the seat next to him. Thad had almost forgotten about the lecture.

He is in no mood to have this talk, so he decides to get out of it the most efficient way he can think of: the truth.

"Eddie and myself have come to an..." Thad stops to think of the right word. Grife, he hates these past languages. He finds the word, snaps his finger and says, a tad louder than necessary, "Understanding!"

"Uh-huh."

The almost non-answer doesn't stop Thad from continuing "So if we can do this tomorrow that would be preferable because I really need a shower."

"I can tell." Max deadpans.

Thad takes that as a cue to go, but he stops at the foot of the stairs and timidly asks "You're... you're not mad, are you?"

Max sighs and says "No, I just have a headache."

Thad, relieved by the answer, goes to take his shower.

Max turns the TV on and changes it to the news, which is trying to report two stories simultaneously; a supervillain attack, and the vandalising of a mayoral candidate's car. It doesn't take too much thinking to connect Thad smelling like gas, a torched car, and a villain defeated by a gas explosion.

Great, yet another thing he has to get Thad to explain.

They cut to an interview with the haggard candidate, who is ranting about the "degenerates" who wrecked his car.

The man goes on and on and on, making Max think maybe, just maybe, he'll let Thad get away with this one. On second thought, Bart would probably take it personally, so that's out of the question.

Eventually, the news becomes background noise and Max drifts off to sleep.

In the middle of his slumber, Max realizes that he is standing, but he cannot move any part of his body.

He stands there for what feels like ages until a tiny shock of electricity gives him just enough energy to open his eyes.

What he sees leaves him with the most intense feeling of déjà-vu he has ever felt. His vision is completely taken up by an endless purple maelstrom.

Max suddenly recognizes where he is: The Speed Force. But something feels... wrong about it. But he can't place what that something is.

"Max, Max, Max, haven't we done this enough times today?" a voice drawls behind him.

A particularly hard smack on his back is followed by a completely featureless purple man swaggering into his line of sight.

"Well, technically I brought you here this time, but hey, semantics, right?" Max feels like the man would have a shit-eating grin plastered on his face if he had one.

"As you can probably tell, I am very busy." He gestures at the purple energy enveloping everything. "And I don't have the time to keep wiping your mind, as fun as it is."

"Now, I am a gracious host, so I'll give you a fighting chance." The man, quick as lightning, grabs Max's face. Instantaneously, the memories of the entire last month of meditation is returned to him.

Still reeling from the shock, he nearly misses the man say "If you can guess my name, I will let you keep those memories. Five minutes. Though I bet you'll get it before then."

Max immediately starts trying to deduct who the man could possibly be. He seems to think that Max has far more information than he actually does. His thoughts are only interrupted by the man chiming in for every minute passed.

Just as Max concludes that he has no idea who he is, the man cheers "Time's up!"

He reaches out his hand, crackling with electricity, towards Max as he says "One chance. No retries. Good luck!"

A bolt hits Max, giving him the energy to make at least one movement, maybe less.

So he does nothing.

It takes the man less than fifteen seconds to become irrationally impatient, saying "C'mon man, didn't I give you enough?" He blasts Max again.

Max remains completely still. He gets blasted another three times. Still nothing.

The man, who'd previously kept himself at arm's length, storms up to him, yelling "You'd better give me an answer before I do something you'll regret!"

So Max gives him an answer, in the form of a punch to the face.

The man explodes as the Speed Force screams and turns to a more reddish-purple.

Max then feels the unpleasant sensation of about two thousand fists colliding with him at the same time.

Suddenly the man is inches from Max's face, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt, flinging him around like a ragdoll and screeching "HOW DARE YOU!? I'LL THROW YOUR DOG OFF A BRIDGE AND BEAT YOUR MOTHER WITH WHAT'S LEFT! I'D RIP OUT YOUR GUTS AND WEAR THEM AS A HAT IF I DIDN'T ALREADY HAVE ONE!” he points at his own head so forcefully that he makes contact with his head and he freezes.

He runs a hand over his hatless head and looks down at his barren torso. He lets go of Max's battered form and puts both hands on his smooth face, during which the Speed Force returns to it's previous purple hue.

The man sheepishly mutters “Uh... whoops. My bad."

He pulls Max back to his feet and, brushing off nonexistent dirt, conversationally saying "No wonder you couldn't tell who I was!"

Once Max is sufficiently cleaned up and re-frozen, the man takes a step back and admires his handiwork. He then appears to get lost in thought for a minute, until a figurative lightbulb lights up over his head.

He jams his thumbs into where his eyesockets would be and twists them around until he's satisfied. When he pulls them out, two blindingly white orbs taking up the previously blank space. Not quite done, he grabs his jaw and tears open a jagged mouth for himself.

He looks over to Max and remarks "I'm doing a pretty good job, wouldn't ya say?" He then proceeds to cackle at his own joke for a while until he smacks his cheeks lightly and says "Right, back to work."

He digs his fingers into his hip and drags it up his chest diagonally, an upside down lightning bolt forming after it. He spins on his heel like a top before striking a pose like a stage magician, declaring "Now for the peace day resistance!"

Max wishes more than anything that he could do anything to make him shut the hell up.

The man gestures dramatically at the wall of the Speed Force and a chunk of iron flies out of it. He starts molding it like a sculptor would clay, rambling  "You know, I was just as surprised as you are now when I found out that people aren't the only things that get sucked in here. You're probably thinking, "Oh, he's so cool! I wish I was as smart as hi-" Ah! It's done!" He holds up the finished product, a familiar helmet, with reverence.

"Well, it's almost done." He waves a hand and some copper wire flies into his hand. He quickly gets to work fashioning it into the shape he wants, saying "Gold doesn't last too long in here, so I have to make due. And... done!"

The man proudly puts the helmet, now complete with tiny wings, and struts up to Max, saying "Now to deal with you."

He puts his hand almost entirely over Max's face, leaving his eyes exposed. "If it makes you feel any better, I wasn't going to let you keep those memories even if you did guess my name."

Max clenches his hand into a fist, surprising the man.

"Oh! You're stronger than I thought. I guess I should tell you something about me." He smiles an almost friendly smile at Max. "Right? Right."

Then, faster than Max can comprehend, his head is slammed against the ground and held there.

The man, with a crazed look on his face, snarls "I. Have. No. Rival."

Electricity shoots through the man's arm and straight into Max's skull as the man says, chipper as can be, "See you in a couple weeks!"

Max wakes up so violently that he almost falls out of bed.

Once he composes himself, he tries to remember what the dream was, but his headache is so blinding that he can't. Oh, well.

He then starts his morning routine, which consists of the usual stuff people do in the morning; getting dressed, brushing teeth, taking a shower, making a detailed schedule of the day, and... huh.

He can't remember the last time he's meditated. Hmm. Of course, he thinks, now he has two kids to teach and he barely had the time to mediate with just one!

Routine finished, Max goes downstairs to get breakfast and to tell Thad that it's not okay to beat up your classmates or set people's cars on fire and no, it doesn't matter if you think they did something, you still need proof. He can't believe he has to have this talk again.

It's going to be a long day.

[bonemeal12]

craydl... come home... please...

CRAYDL FANDOM WHERE YOU AT‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥

[dementedspeedster]

meta: cradyl

Accepting || send me a topic to write a meta about my muse on @legacychosen

I'm emotional about green goo, (actually an AI inhabiting technoplasm). But regardless I'm emotional!!!

Craydl is absolutely Thad first friend and probably his best friend for however long Thad has been alive during the events of Impulse (so like 12-14 years). I am so emotional about Craydl having two modes of communication programmed into him. One is conversational mode and HE CALLS THAD 'BOSSMAN'.

If anyone ever calls my Thad, 'Boss' or 'Bossman' he will dislike/hate it because only Craydl can call him that. Those are the nicknames he associates with Craydl and only Craydl.

Craydl also has so much personality and is willing to call Thad on his bull. Specifically, the fact he calls him out on his obsessiveness regarding Bart is my favorite. Honestly if Thad ever got a solo series or returned to comics I would love to see Craydl as a balancing force for Thad, who can call him out when he or his actions become a detriment to himself.

Ok, so regarding my Thad's relationship with Craydl: Thad in the comics (Flash: Fastest Man Alive) last sees Craydl in his lab in the future and then later down the line dies during the events of Rogues Revenge because he sorta tricked them (it depends on how you look at it; they're both at fault) into killing Bart, but because of this I believe that Craydl is left in the 31st Century due to his death. Thad loves Craydl. He cherishes him so much as his first friend, first best friend, he's the first thing he ever had at his side and Craydl was his caretaker as well. But Thad is also a coward, he's scared of his father, returning to the future, the potential of confront him or being captured (because time travel is very closely monitored by the Time Police in the 31st Century, so Thawne would know the moment he steps into the century), and just the threat that if he is captured that something will happen to him. That he is risking his life, the life he has made for himself in the 21st century and how he has grown and changed himself in his time here, and the freedom he has gained by separating himself from his family.

He's scared and has a strong sense of self preservation that he does put ahead of everything else (though there are the rare exceptions), so he can't will himself to return for Craydl, but he does miss him. Maybe one day he will go back for Craydl, but his desire for self preservation and he does feel guilt over that. He can't and won't replace Craydl, but he can't go back for him just yet either.

...Writing this just makes me want Thad and Craydl have a reunion, so that Craydl can see the kind of person he has become because he has changed so much.

[dementedspeedster]

 ☼ questions: 1) what do you like about me most? 2) what do you miss the most about our time? 3) favorite food?

Accepting || Send me a ☼ and my muse will answer yours 100% truthfully about any 3 things your muse asks mine, even if it’s something they want to hide.

@deborahmorgna

“1. I like your personality the most. You’re caring, strong, stubborn.” Thad flashes Deb a teasing grin, “All qualities I love about you. 2. Well, I miss Craydl who’s still probably waiting in my lab, but that’s not really something about the future. I suppose I miss the tech, honestly. You know I’m not exactly fond of our home century for any of the...let’s say ‘normal’ reasons.” It might have been where he was created, but nothing was tying him there anymore.

“And 3. I’m going to be as general with this as possible because you know how hard it is for me to pick a favourite food. Seafood.” 

[duke-nitro]

Mercury Falling AU: Surprises

(Also on Ao3!)

On a particularly lazy Saturday, Helen is filling out some paperwork in the living room. Well, she's trying to, but with Bart running to the window every time he hears a car slow down it's getting pretty frustrating having to hold the papers down every time a car passes.

Eventually, she asks why he keeps running back and forth.

He replies "I won a sweepstakes!"

"Which one?"

"...I don't remember."

Helen pauses for a moment and asks "How?"

"Well, I did enter every sweepstakes that Alabama was eligible in."

Helen rolls her eyes with a smile and asks "What did you win?"

"All I got was a call that said I would get what I won in the mail."

Helen thinks that might be one of the fishiest things she's ever heard but she doesn't want to rain on Bart's parade, so she lets it slide.

(Thad hands her a paperweight a few minutes later.)

An hour and a half later, the mail still hasn't come and Bart is now sitting next to the mailbox, just about ready to jump into traffic the moment he sees the mail truck.

Just as Bart is starting to wonder that maybe it's Sunday, (that happens sometimes) the mail truck comes. He almost causes a pile-up trying to get to it.

Bart nearly gives everyone a heart attack with how suddenly he slams the door open. He takes almost too much joy in shoving the letter in everyone's faces.

When Thad tells him to "Just open it already!", He tears it open and opens his mouth to say something but no sound comes out.

After about thirty seconds of Bart standing there, silent, Thad walks over and yanks the letter out of his hands and reads it. He squints and tilts his head in confusion. He turns to Max and asks "What's mini golf?"

As it turns out, Bart won a free month's worth of mini golf. At one course. He is not pleased about it. Mostly because one of the other prizes was a dirt bike, but also because he hates golf. Like, a lot.

Helen and Max were trying to be optimistic on the drive there, but when they get there they have to re-check the address they got to make sure they have the right place.

The course is, to put it nicely, rustic. If you're not putting it nicely, you could say that the place looks like it could have been abandoned years ago, were it not for the one person working there.

The one employee, who is a teenager who clearly does not want to be there, tells them that if they don't have clubs they can grab some from the bin in the corner. The clubs are... not in good condition. Some of them don't have grips, some don't have heads, and almost all of them are bent.

Somehow, mini golf is more boring than regular golf. The only thing that Bart is even remotely enjoying about it is that the club he picked is bent at a ninety degree angle.

On hole three out of ten, they see the employee get in his car and drive off. Max and Helen share a worried look.

Four holes later Bart yells "Hey! Watch this!" Everyone turns to look at him just as he winds up for a massive swing. Before anyone can tell him to stop he yells, at the top of his lungs, "TOUCHDOWN!!!' and swings as fast as he can.

He misses, and the club flies out of his hands and disappears into the clouds.

After a few moments of stunned silence, the transponder on Thad's watch turns on and a voice comes through it nervously saying "Hey, guys? There's a... umm..."

But before Thad can ask what Craydl is talking about a fireball falls from the sky, smashing the building they got the clubs in.

Once they recover from the shock, Max takes a step forward to see what fell. But the moment he does part of the wreck flies off, landing mere feet from Bart. They look at it and notice that it has NASA written on it.

From the wrecked satellite emerges a very tall (about seven feet), rail thin metallic man. He walks, unscathed, out of the fire.

He booms "Who do I have to thank for freeing me from my void-prison!", holding out a scorched golf club as he speaks.

Thad turns to glare at Bart while Max asks who the metal man is.

"My name is Katmos!", he says very loudly "And I was the ruler of this planet in the year eight million B.C.!"

Max asks what he was doing up there. Katmos responds "I was imprisoned in the void by your paltry military after I was denied my rightful place by that... that troglodyte that you call The Flash!"

"But now that I am free, I can continue my quest to reclaim my title as absolute ruler of Earth!"

Max walks towards him and says "Listen, you can't d-"

Before he can finish, Katmos strikes him upside the head, knocking him out instantly.

Bart and Thad rush in the moment Max gets hit.

They don't have much more luck.

Katmos struts away, laughing to himself as he goes.

Thad's transponder turns on again, but he's not conscious enough to answer it.

So Helen does.

Craydl says "Well, that sure happened."

Helen is in no mood for jokes and demands to know why he didn't help. Craydl responds "My Technoplasm is undergoing maintenance!"

"Your WHAT!?"

"Anyways", Craydl interrupts, "I can't really do much right now. Do you have any ideas?"

Helen brainstorms for a moment before coming up with something. She tells Craydl the plan and he says, through his laughter, "Oh man, I can get that done in ten minutes. God, I hope this works!"

Eleven minutes later Helen catches up to Katmos just as Craydl gives the go-ahead.

She drops to one knee and pledges her allegiance to him. Katmos cackles and says "Ha-ha! Getting my first subject was easier than I thought it was going to be! I didn't even have to use my mind-control gun! Follow me, my loyal servant! We shall go this nation's capitol and- wait, what's that in the sky?"

He points a tiny green spot in the sky. Helen smiles.

Suddenly, a dozen black dots come out of the green dot. Katmos exclaims "What are those?!"

Helen puts on a worried voice and says "It's the military! You have to run!"

"Why!? My might far exceeds theirs!"

"You've been space for years! You don't know how far they've advanced!"

Realization dawns on Katmos' face and he runs back the way he came. Helen yells after him "No, not that way!" He changes direction so suddenly he trips and falls flat on his face.

He runs back and says "Where am I supposed to go then!?"

Helen pauses, as she hadn't thought she would get this far. So she says the first place that comes to mind.

"Albuquerque!"

"Albuquerque!? Where's that!?"

She points in a random direction and says "That way!"

He starts running but Helen yells "You can't run there, the military can track you! You have to dig!"

He starts tearing at the dirt at a surprising speed. Just before he's completely underground Helen calls after him "If you see Bugs, tell him I said hi!"

Katmos pops out of the hole, looking almost absurdly stern. Helen thinks that maybe the jig is up, but then he does a gesture that she is almost one-hundred percent sure is some kind of ancient salute so she does it back. He smiles and burrows back underground.

After making sure he's gone Helen sighs in relief as the lab junk that Craydl repurposed falls from the sky.

On the drive back, Bart is laughing to the point of tears as Helen and Craydl recount what happened. Thad is confused By how hard Bart started to laugh the moment "Albuquerque" came up. And Max is just proud.

When they get back home, Max feels like they forgot something important. Oh well, maybe he'll remember it when he meditates later.

He remembers two weeks later, when the obliterated mini golf course shows up on the news. Nobody actually reported that it was destroyed, the traffic copter just happened to fly over the crater.

(Flash Fact!: Katmos' first (and only) appearance was in "The Flash, issue 105 vol. 1", in the story "The Conqueror from 8 Million B.C.!")

[duke-nitro]

Mercury Falling AU: Monsters 2: Electric Boogaloo

(Also on Ao3!)

Max is having some complications in his weekly Speed Force meditation. Partially due to Thad turning the house upside trying to figure out where Bart keeps disappearing to, but mostly due to the fact that the Speed Force isn't responding at all.

Thad is getting seriously ticked off not knowing where Bart keeps going. All Craydl is telling him is "He's not leaving city limits", like that's helpful.

The only clue Thad has is that twice a week Bart goes missing and comes back covered in mud. (Which is a nightmare to clean, by the way)

So now he's searching the whole house to see if there's anything hinting at where Bart's going.

However, in the middle of his searching Max tells him, with irritation laced in his voice, "Why don't you look for a place in town that has mud?"

Thad doesn't pick up on the tone of his voice but takes his advice anyways.

Once he leaves, Max goes back to meditating.

Still nothing.

Thad has been looking all around town for half an hour (that's a lot longer for a speedster) and he still hasn't found anywhere with mud, let alone anywhere with the amount that Bart keeps getting covered in.

That is, until he sees the swamp.

Well, he saw it halfway through his search but he didn't think that Bart would be dumb enough to trudge through a swamp multiple times a week. It isn't until it's the only option that he finally goes in.

After a long while trudging through the swamp Thad finally hears Bart behind some bushes.

Peeking through, he sees Bart playing in the mud with... some kind of monster man?

Well, it doesn't look like the monster is actively trying to kill Bart, so Thad decides to ask what the hell he's doing here.

Bart nearly jumps out of his skin when he hears Thad.

Once Bart manages to calm down a bit (and after throwing a rock at Thad) he explains what he's doing.

"Well, this is... omigod I forgot what his name was." Thad facepalms.

"Anyways," Bart continues, "he's just... a lonely kid, y'know?"

Thad looks over to what he just found out to be a child, who is currently trying to make something out of sticks (poorly).

He sighs and runs home, jumping in the river on the way back. (He didn't want to track mud everywhere)

Max is starting to get close to giving up his meditating when the Speed Force finally starts to respond, but before he can actually do anything with the connection he is suddenly sprinkled with just enough water to break his concentration.

He opens his eyes to see Thad flitting around the room, looking for something.

Max pinches the bridge of his nose and asks, exasperated,  "What are you looking for this time?"

Thad turns and timidly says "Some tools?"

Max tells him to "Check the shed".

Thad thanks him and runs off.

Max goes back to his meditating.

And he's right back to square one.

Bart is still hanging out with Hector (Bart ran over to his parents to ask what his name was) when Thad comes back with some building supplies. (Hammers, nails, some boards, the works)

Bart nervously asks "Hey, uh... why do you have that stuff?"

Thad scoffs and says "Look at that", pointing at the stick-structure "That won't last a day without any reinforcements!"

After a moment Bart starts laughing at Thad's extreme perfectionism, flustering Thad to the point of him throwing one of the hammers at him.

The three of them spend the rest of the day building stuff until Hector has to go home. They promise to come back in a couple days and run home.

Thad pushes Bart into the river on the way back.

Meanwhile, Max manages to connect to the Speed Force. (It only took four hours)

And what he sees disturbs him, to say the least. The Speed Force is silent.

Usually he can hear an ambient hum or the vague sound of people talking, but today there is nothing.

The only thing visually different is that there is a purplish tint to everything.

After probing for a while, Max comes to the worrying conclusion that the Speed Force is completely empty.

But just as he's about to stop meditating and contact the other speedsters, he sees a faint outline.

He starts to approach what he can now tell is the outline of a person, but before he can touch it or even see it properly, the figure turns to look him and Max is hit with a splitting headache, one so intense he passes out.

When he wakes up later, he figures that he fell asleep in the middle of meditating.

All he remembers is that he wanted to tell the others something, but he can't remember what that something was.

"Hmm" he thinks, "Maybe meditating later might help jog my memory."

Wash, rinse, and repeat.

[duke-nitro]

Mercury Falling AU: Chicken Edition (part two I guess?)

A continuation of this post. (This one isn’t really a story, it’s just a few things I didn’t want to divide into multiple posts)

  It takes a long time for Thad to name the chicken. Like, two weeks. He eventually settles on Bessie, which really frustrates Bart. (”That’s a cow name, Thad! You can’t call it that!”) No one is sure why he calls it that, as it’s a plain brown hen. Max, having grown up in very rural areas, can understand why he wanted a chicken. Helen, on the other hand, doesn’t really get why but it’s one of the few things that can make him smile almost without fail, so she just rolls with it. They make a day of setting up a small chicken coop even though it’s mostly an indoor pet. Bart almost breaks his thumb trying to hit a nail with a hammer. He missed. 

  Wally is... surprised, to say the least. He hadn’t really interacted that much with Thad before, so he didn’t really trust him not to double-cross them. But he trusted him enough not to do something like this. Now instead of worrying the they might be betrayed, he’s worrying that Thad might become Impulse 2.0. Linda has seen a lot of weird shit in her life so this doesn’t phase her at all. Bessie latches herself on Wally’s head thinking that it was a nest of some kind. (Wally hadn’t taken a shower in a while. Being The Flash is very time consuming.) It takes around ten minutes to get her off him. Wally is very glad he heals quick, but he knows he’ll never live this down.

  One time, when Thad was taking Bessie for a walk, (He had to make a leash for her) a hawk tries to swoop down and grab Bessie. Thad thinks “I think the fuck not.”  and grabs the hawk by the neck and just chucks it. It seems fine, but Thad doesn’t care. He grabs Bessie and runs home, normal speed, in case someone was looking. God, he hoped that no one saw that.

  After  Bart and Thad move in with the Garricks (They don’t mind Bessie that much. It does make Jay think of his old pet turtle for some reason.) and start settling into a new school, someone tells them a story they heard from somebody else. It sorta goes like this: A kid was walking down the street in what he’s fairly sure was Alabama, when they saw a boy walking his pet... dog? Yeah, that sounds about right. Anyways, this huge-ass bird tries to scoop up the dog but the boy just chokeslams the damn thing. Then the boy picked up his dog and ran away at like, Olympics-level speed.

  Thad feels like he’s dying inside and Bart’s trying to figure out how he never heard this before. The dying inside feeling doesn’t go away for a while. And that’s how Thad somehow became a schoolyard tale, one that drives him do research on how to remove stories from word of mouth circulation. He finds a way to achieve this, but Craydl points out that what he’s theorizing might actually be a super bad idea if someone else uses it. Thad doesn’t believe him, so Craydl forces him to read 1984. Thad listens to him for once, and scraps the whole thing.

(I’m just gonna say here that I have no idea what Thad was planning. Also, Thad’s moral compass sorta just... breaks from time to time. Like, he’ll start doing something rather morally questionable but the moment someone points it out he takes a step back and goes, “What the fuck was I doing?” Eobard tries to use that to convince him to switch sides. Thad actually does chokeslam him.)