#Cottage Wally

[amybizarre]

Welcome Home Cottagecore AU

Yeah boi, here we go- I posted about it already on Wattpad and AO3, but I wanted to offer it to more people! ^^ I only have a scribble of Cottagecore Wally rn, but hopefully a more proper drawing will come soon! Aside from that, enjoy some facts about Wally and introductions for the other neighbors under the cut! ^^

About Wally

1) He is 3ft smol! :3 (Yes, canon height >:3)

2) Wally is a little menace. But he's cute. So he gets away with it.

3) He always rolls up his pant legs a little, otherwise they'd be too long.

4) Of course Cottage Wally always wants to look dapper, so he wears his pompadour, a now green ascot, well worn dress shirt, olive waistcoat and his usual or brown shoes.

5) His absolute favorite piece of clothing however is his giant, oversized, beige cardigan, that the newest neighbor in their village (that neighbor being YOU) "lent" him.

6) You'll never get it back.

7) The sleeves are so long, they cover his hands most of the time. Which comes in very "handy" when "borrowing" apples from Howdy's farm.

8) Without his cardigan he gets very cold and upset.

9) That's why he wears it ALL the time. :)

10) All his clothes are mostly brown, beige or green.

11) He loves drawing outside! That's why he always has twigs, leaves and flower petals stuck in his hair. And the occasional bandaid on his "nose" or cheek, cause man's a little clumsy.

12) Wally blinks owlishly (like, one eye at a time) when he doesn't understand something.

13) Home is a tree house in this AU!

14) Underneath Home, Wally has a flower garden, where he grows his own special "spiral flowers".

15) Wally can see through these spiral flowers.

16) Wally has given each neighbor a spiral flower as a symbol of his friendship and platonic love. :)

17) Wally has an especially fluffy bed of flowers underneath Home's entrance, so he can just jump down into them without getting hurt.

18) Wally loves to nap in flower beds. No matter where.

19) He has a swing made from vines.

20) Flower crowns all day baby! One for every occasion and weather.

21) If his flowers wilt a little, he will ask Julie to drop by and talk to his flowers to figure out whats wrong with them.

22) Wally has freckles in this AU! :3

About Howdy

Howdy is a farmer in this AU, who does both: Grow crops and raise animals. Whatever his neighbors may need, be it wheat, milk, butter, cheese or wool - no matter! - he's got it all and is happy to sell or share. It's a lot of work tho, to maintain a farm. Even when he's got four hands! So naturally he appreciates any help he can get and will repay accordingly. A jolly, big floof with a big heart, who adores a good joke to lighten the mood during work.

About Poppy

Poppy loves to go on walks in the woods. She has a little nack for collecting all sorts of mushrooms. But fret not! She knows each and every one of them by heart! Same goes for all types of herbs, nuts and berries and everything else you can forage for. She usually ends up cooking stock, conserving/drying the things she collected, to make tea from it or even home made medicine. She always makes wayyy too much for just herself tho, so she gives a lot of it away to the neighbors. Sweet, gentle and caring as usual.

About Frank

Frank is the local librarian, who keeps the small community building (where the library is in) in check. He's also keeps bees as a hobby. His bees usually fly around either the community area or Howdy's fruit trees. He knows a lot - and I mean A LOT - about all sorts of insects, with his favorite still being butterflies. Frank always seems to act a little off when Eddie's around. He is usually very disciplined and stern, but likes to loosen up every now and then.

About Eddie

Eddie is your local mailman! And if he isn't delivering newspapers or letters, he helps Howdy out on the farm. He just looooves the animals there. He's quite clumsy and gullible, sure, but he has the potential to be the best friend you could ever ask for. His favorite spot to hang out in is the community area of the village. A big guy, who is (not so) secretly an even bigger softie.

About Frank & Eddie's relationship

Now, both of them are obviously gay. For each other. A LOT. Eddie is super chill and open about his feelings towards Frank and likes to flirt with him whenever he gets the chance. Or he flatters him with small gestures like giving his hand a smol kiss, when they meet.

Now here's the thing: Everyone knows that Frank is gay. Except for Frank himself. He's just way too stubborn and proud to admit to himself that he's fallen in love with Eddie. Thus he hasn't even figured out he's gay yet. But: He still gets this fuzzy feeling and red cheeks when Eddie's around. Frank still gets flustered and worked up, when Eddie gives him a compliment. Which annoys Frank to no end, because he cannot figure out why he's feeling the way he does. But Eddie is blissfully unbothered by this, knowing exactly what's going on with Frank. So he keeps up his flirting and patiently waits for Frank to come out of his shell.

TLDR: Shenanigans ensue. In a comical way. And yes, they'll become a couple later on. ;)

About Sally

Sally is an aspiring musician and poet, hoping to swoon the world one day. She can often be found just lounging around in scenic spots, strumming away on her guitar or banjo and humming these sweet, sweet tunes. She is a dreamer and more easygoing character, who adores poetry and duets with her friends.

About Julie

Julie is the local florist in the village. She knows every single flower by name, considering she can speak to them. She likes to help her friends to tend to their gardens and keeps the flowers in the community area in check together with Frank. She is a very chipper gal, who enjoys quality time with others which may or may not involve taking them on little adventures outside of the village.

About Barnaby

Barns is still Wally's best friend and tells his jokes like there's no tomorrow! But the Funny Business isn't his only one! He usually helps Howdy with herding, when Eddie isn't available or does all sorts of odd jobs throughout the whole village. His friends and neighbors appreciate him for his helpful and relaxed nature. When anyone got a problem, he usually calms them down by already having a good solution and offering to help. The only downside? They'll have to endure his petrifying puns all the while!

[cottageimp]

I had an urge to draw some self indulgent oc x canon things! Mosby and Wally... they are so soft together! So sweet! I wanna do more of these... They feel wholesome and give me nice warm feelings of happiness.

[moontearsonthescrean]

So.... I have a suggestion.

What about... Cavetown Wally?

Based on, of course, Cavetown and cottage core aesthetic. I'm still working on the AU, but here's some concept art.

I'll post more about it in the future

[evil-comic-artis-t]

uhh soo this is the au i was talking about (ik, its just the sketch but shhhhhhh....)

I named it: "Hidden Library AU" :D

this was a very quick sketch, i drew it on a car ride but its oddly better than usual :)

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

helloooo have a messy scribble page of oc concepts. unfortunately, im in love and will now proceed to ramble At Length

but before that! rudimentary height chart!

all i know rn is Mairy - the cow - is about the same height as Howdy/Barnaby/Poppy (around 8ft), Hettie & Daisy are in the Wally/Julie/Sally category (around 3ft), and Jesterly is more Frank/Eddie (around 4ft). Derry Drake is fuckoff huge, and Casey is... idk really. tall but not That tall

so. rambles. i... have those, yeah

Mairy Love - she/her - lesbian a gorgeous white/blue cow! originally she was gonna be pink/white, but blue/white is my favorite color combo and honestly? it's dairy colors to me. she's big! she's strong! she's very gentle and sweet but also takes shit from no one, even though she doesn't like confrontation much (unless its playful roughhousing! jokes fly completely over her head! i'm thinking she tends to a lovely orchard of various fruit trees, and probably cultivates some crops for fun as well. maybe seasonal ones? pumpkins for the spooky season, fir trees for those snowy days, etc.

Casey J. Mittens - he/him - aro this orange fella is scaredy cat central! unfortunately for him, he's also curious to a fault! curiosity killed the cat, and he fears the day that rings true for him! he'd rather curl up at home or in a cozy tree, crocheting something cute from one of his many balls of yarn than do anything else. he tries to be a voice of reason, but is too easily convinced otherwise. he's that friend who says "we shouldn't be doing this" as he wholeheartedly assists in the shenanigan in question.

Hettie (currently undecided) - she/her - bi true to her honeybee heritage, Hettie is a florist! she boasts an impressive array of flowers that she tends to like her life depends on it. she's always running around to make sure they're all getting the best care - and she's always checking in on her pals to make sure they're taken care of, too. she's a busy bee who wouldn't know a day's rest if it stung her on the ass! It takes a lot to make her mad, but everybody better watch out when her wings start buzzing

Daisy Hop - she/him - pan i actually created Daisy as a supplementary character for a certain au, but realized i could find a place for her in this little group. i'm thinking he runs a little shop - a roadside stall, more like - where she can both sell her own homemade candy & his friends' stuff! she's the only one in the group that can keep up with Hettie's energy, and even surpass it at times. though unlike Hettie, Daisy knows how to take (and appreciate) a break!

Jesterly - whatever/is/funniest - Derry a menace. they love pranks above all else, oftentimes at the expense of others. he's always up to something and is never not scheming something! there's always Someone to bother! in all honesty she's more like an annoying stray cat that no one can get rid of... and they better not try, or they'll face the wrath of this fool's Very large partner! The jester's cap never comes off, and neither does the mask!

Derry Drake - they/them - Jesterly there's no sugarcoating it - Derry is a big lazy grump! it's almost impossible to get them out of their cave, or off of any place they decide to nap. the only thing that can reliably get them moving is the promise - or prospect - of food. it's a wonder how they've accumulated such a hoard of random things in the back of their cave, seeing as they rarely get up at all. they're incredibly nearsighted and bite first, ask questions later - after all, who knows if the colorful blob in front of them is food or not! better to be safe than hungry!

currently in my mind they have their own little community deep in the woods. Daisy lives in a modified burrow, Maisy has a cute farmhouse, Casey lives in a cozy treehouse, Hettie has a small cottage, and Derry & Jesterly live in a cave. within their community, they share practically everything. want a snack? pluck something from the orchard. need a new pair of mittens? ask Casey! i suppose you could say they're communists <3 (except for Daisy. she won't charge his friends, but anyone else is free game)

Mairy and Hettie have romantic tension, Daisy and Derry are the only ones who can tolerate Jes, Mairy wants Jes dead, Casey is terrified of Derry, Daisy's rapid-fire speech confuses everyone but Hettie, etc. i should make a chart for funsies...

[samgirl98]

Mending a Family 2/?

Prev | Next

TW: MENTIONS OF SUICIDE/ SUICIDAL IDEATION

Disclaimer: I don't know anything about Roy Harper except what I've learned through fandom and Wiki. Please excuse me if he is out of character. Roy accidentally finds Jason.

Roy couldn’t believe his eyes. Jason Todd stood a few feet in front of him. The same Jason Todd who died years ago. He had red hair instead of black, and his eyes were green instead of blue. He was taller and broader, and a kid was hanging to his leg.

Roy would recognize him anywhere, no matter how much he had changed.

(Jason’s death was the reason he fell to alcoholism and tried to commit suicide via Killer Crocodile.)

“Daddy, I want to get closer to the edge,” Lian said.

Lian had wanted to see Niagara Falls for her sixth birthday. He never imagined he would run into a dead boy.

Jason hadn’t noticed him yet. Roy had no idea what to do. It’s not as if he could Dick and say, “Hey, how have you been? Did you know your dead brother is walking around Niagara Falls with a kid in tow?”

Roy could imagine how that conversation would go.

“Sorry, sweetie, it’s too dangerous,” he answered his daughter a beat later. His little girl pouted. Roy couldn’t help but smile. He loved Lian so much it hurt sometimes.

Suddenly, the little boy holding on to Jason looked at Roy with eerie green eyes before tugging on Jason’s pants and pointing at Roy. Jason looked at them. Roy watched as Jason’s eyes grew in fear before he got the little boy and ran. Well, if that wasn’t confirmation, Roy didn’t know what was.

Roy didn’t want to leave Lian alone, so he let his old friend run from him. It seemed he had some favors to call.

____

Raven was the only person Roy could think would help him without wanting to spill the beans right away. Wally was Dick’s best friend and would tell him immediately that they found his little brother alive; Starfire was out of the picture for similar reasons. Garth wouldn’t be able to keep it a secret. Cyborg could go either way. And Donna would want to go to Dick without even investigating first. So, Raven it was.

 Once Roy explained who he saw and why he went to her, Raven agreed to help him.

She teleported them to Niagara Falls.

“There is a feeling of death here; it’s very strong.”

“Well, he did die. If he’s back…”

Raven shook her head, “It’s more than that. It feels like death magic but not malicious.”

Roy blinked. How was death magic not malicious?

Raven lifted him telekinetically, and they flew past the Canadian border.

Twenty minutes later, they landed in front of a little cottage in the middle of the forest. Jason was sipping a cup of tea on the porch on a rocking chair. He glared at Raven and Roy.

“If you wake my kid, I’m gonna kill you,” he threatened in a low voice. “What do you want, Harper? Did Dick send you?”

Roy blinked at Jason’s hard tone, and then what he said caught up to him.

“Dick, why would Dick send me? Aren’t you supposed to be dead?”

Jason snorted.

“Of course, they didn’t tell the hero community about the failure of the Batfamily coming back,” he said bitterly.

Roy blinked and turned to Raven, who frowned. Then what Jason said hit him, “Wait, Dick knows you’re back?!”

An hour later, Roy knew everything, and he was fuming. Dick had no right to keep something like this from him. So Jason had come back angry and spiteful; who cared? He was better now. Roy could understand not telling the whole damned world, but he couldn’t have told Roy that Jason was back? Roy almost committed suicide because of Jason’s death!

“So, how does the kid factor into all of this?”

Jason drank the rest of his now cold tea.

“I found him when he got spat out through a portal. I couldn’t leave him. I know it sounds weird, but I have a connection with him. We’re similar.”

“Not similar,” Raven said, “the same. Whatever he is, you are, too.”

Jason smiled sadly, “We’ve been touched by death and came back different. He’s not fully human. He’s half ghost, half human. Please, don’t tell the Bats you found me. They’d take him away from me, and I don’t think I’d survive it.”

Raven put a hand on Jason’s shoulder, and he felt a wash of calm come over him.

“Don’t worry; I know how you feel. I won’t tell anyone.”

“Me either, kid.”

Jason gave them a grateful smile. His eyes were suspiciously wet,

“Thank you.”

There was a beat of silence.

“So, when can we meet the tyke,” Roy asked.

Jason frowned, “When he wakes up. He doesn’t sleep enough, so I try to let him catch his Zs.”

“But I’ve been awake this whole time, papa,” a small voice said; no one was around.

Roy looked a bit spooked, and Raven looked surprised. Jason sighed.

“Danny, show yourself.”

A little boy with black hair and blue eyes appeared before them.

“Chum, you’re supposed to be asleep.”

“I couldn’t sleep; I felt a weird spirit’s presence. I wanted to make sure you were safe.”

Danny looked at Raven.

“You’re not like me and daddy, but you’re not fully human, either. What are you?”

“Danny, that’s rude,” Jason scolded him.

Danny pouted, and Raven laughed.

“It’s okay, Jason, he’s just curious. I’m half-human, half-demon.”

“That’s so cool! Me and daddy aren’t fully human, either. We’re halfas—half-human, half-ghost.”

“Danny, I’ve already told you I’m not a halfa. I don’t have any powers.”

“Okay, whatever you say, papa,” Danny said in a sing-song voice. Jason sighed.

Suddenly, Danny turned serious and pierced Raven and Roy with an intense look, “You’re not going to tell those bad people about us, right? They hurt daddy.”

Both Roy and Raven looked at each other. Raven flinched when she felt Jason’s overwhelming sadness and grief hit her. He was fingering a scar he had on his throat. How had he gotten it?

“Danny-lad, I already told you; I hurt them first. It’s okay; you don’t have to be mad at them.”

Danny’s eyes turned an eerie shade of neon green that had Raven shivering in her skin. Jason’s eyes turned into the same shade in response.

“It’s okay, Danny,” Raven tried to reassure the kid, “Nobody will find out about Jason from us.”

Danny looked at her for a while longer before nodding.

“Good, they don’t deserve him.”

Jason sighed.

“C’mon, I’ll make us some breakfast.”

Raven got up and followed the boys into the little cottage. She frowned as she felt a disturbance in the air. She looked south; something big was coming.

Hundreds of miles away, a green portal opened. A young teenage girl with red hair and glowing, teal eyes stepped out with a toddler in her arms. She was armed to the teeth.

“C’mon, Ellie, let’s go find our brother.”

Jazz is here! Is it a bit early, maybe, but I couldn't help myself. I chose Raven as the Titan to help find Jason because of her empath powers. She'd be able to understand Jason, and she's half-human like Danny and Jason. Jason is in denial that he is a halfa, but his powers will come in the future. We might not see the Batfam for two or three chapters.

@justwannabecat @idontgetpaidenoughforthisshit @skulld3mort-1fan @vythika96 @theauthorandtheartist @emergentpanda-blog @jaggedheart11 @fisticuffsatapplebees @booberrylizard @fantasticbluebirdfan @thegatorsgooseoose @cyrwrites @kjoboo91 @crystallicedart @amaramizuki666 @spekulatiusmuffin @meira-3919 @kilasmess @bubblemixer @lexdamo @wonderland-daisy @mj-arts-n-stuff @amyheart19 @dolfay @the-church-grimm @undead-essence @aph-mable @lizisipancardo

[javadoodles404]

(AppleBlood AU) The day everything changed

This was just randomly in my notes so It's not written well, but I tried :D

*Home* used to have an actual name but due to things that happened he prefers to be called "Home"

He's the one that took in Wally, Sally, Frank, and Howdy when they were just kids and had nowhere else to go.

Wally and *Home* loved doing late-night walks, in one of their walks they found an abandoned mansion deep in the forest, it was their little secret.

Until one night, the dreaded night happened, *Home* went into their little cottage scratched up and burnt, he looked at the kids "Alright kiddos, we're gonna have to move, Sally, go grab Howdy from the bedroom, make sure to cover him with a blanket" Sally followed as she runs to the bedroom to get Howdy

*Home* then looks at Wally "Wally, we're gonna need to share our hiding place with the others. The mansion? Mhm, that's where we're gonna live now, We can fix it up a little, there's gonna be room for everyone, be sure to not be seen by anyone okay? Stay as hidden as possible, and go out the back door, I'll have to stay behind and say goodbye to our old neighbors but I'll catch up, no worries" He explains to Wally

Sally then goes out of the room carrying Howdy, *Home* smiled at the four of them, giving them all a kiss on the forehead before leading them out the back door "Remember, stay hidden, don't let anyone follow you, wait in the mansion for me, now go!" A crowd of angry people could be heard from the front door as the kids ran into the forest.

(That's all I could write before my brain fries itself)

[delicatuscii-wasbella102]

Cottage Garden by Kent R. Wallis

[aheathen-conceivably]

Back at the cottage, the sound of playing children and laughter could be heard from nearly every room of the house. Summer and Isaiah’s children were just as rambunctious as Zelda expected, roping Violette into all of their games and lifting the remaining melancholia from the air.

Even Wally, who would usually rather read alone than engage in such joviality, found the energy infectious; so he stayed amidst the noise rather than seek out the studious quiet that he and Virginia were used to in their own home.

The sounds echoed up the stairs into the small second story hallway, where Virginia and Zelda were standing outside of Rosella’s old room. They were both staring at the door as though it sheltered a trove of terrifying secrets, silently daring the other to be the first to open it.

Zelda went forward, her hand on the knob before Virginia could say a word. She turned the handle and eased open the door, letting out the smell of dust collecting in the sunshine.

They stopped in the doorway, marveling at the accumulation of toys and memorabilia, before Zelda pushed the door open wider and walked into the center of the room, “Goodness, Virginia. Have Mother and Isaiah been using it for storage all these years? With brother’s growing family you do think they would have need of it, perhaps transformed it into something more useful.”

Zelda’s question snapped Virginia back to reality and she followed her sister into the room. Her characteristically sharp countenance returned to her face as though the fear had never been there, “I see the new world has made you a bit bolder hasn’t it, sister? We can’t all be so comfortable around things that continue to pain us.”

She turned away before Zelda could respond, searching the room for what she had come for, “Hell, where is it? So many trinkets amongst so few people. I could have sworn they told me it was up here somewhere…”

“Ah-ha! Here it is,” Virginia bent down, moving books and toys out of her way, “I wouldn’t think that you had heard, but a few years ago Harrington Estate fell on hard times….”

Virginia paused momentarily to allow herself a triumphant, gloating smile, “Modernity finally caught up with the old ways, I suppose. Lord Harrington had to break up the whole thing and sell it off piece by piece. During the process he sent a servant down here with this package...”

Without an ounce of the fanfare that the moment called for, Virginia pulled a bright, gilded frame from behind the dresser and propped it up on a trunk, “He said they found this in one of the rooms, thought we might like to have it after what happened.”

The very gravity of the room seemed to shift, recentering itself on the pair of bright green eyes looking off into the distance longingly. Throughout the last seventeen years Zelda had only seen Rosella in a handful of family photos; but none of them compared to this: her sister lovingly painted in a fine formal gown, her curls flowing over her shoulders and rubies draped around her neck.

The painting was rendered in exacting, lifelike colors that Zelda could hardly recall looking at the sepia photographs of their youth, giving the illusion that Rosella was once again back in her room with her sisters, telling them stories of her life at the manor.

Zelda stared forward, unbelieving, “Virginia, I don’t…I don’t understand. What was this doing there? For god’s sake who would have painted it? And how utterly strange that her hair is down; she never would wear it down, even at home. You must remember that, don’t you?”

Virginia didn’t take her eyes off the painting, perhaps so that her own expression wouldn’t give away what she knew of the Harringtons. In answer she kept her gaze averted and shrugged her shoulders, “Whatever it may be, I thought you might like to have it. Perhaps you’re the only one left who can really still look at it and feel joy.”

Zelda eyes shined, “You’re right, sister. And it gives me another idea.”

(My immense and immeasurable thanks to the amazing @scythesms for this lovely painting. Without you this scene would be nothing more than an idea and I appreciate you greatly ❤️)

[amybizarre]

Flower Crown Time Baby!

It's da bebe! Cottage Wally, my son- Wanted to sketch him in a cute flower crown as a warm-up before I tackle Julie's design for the AU, but it turned into a fully colored drawing whoops XD

Can you spot the lil secret I hid in there? >:3c

[cottageimp]

I created this mock up of a cover for a fic I'm writing! It's a silly little story revolving around the cast being contained within a facility...!

It's sort of an AU? But less about the cast and more about the setting and story. It's full of headcanons that I hope are faithful to the characters and a mix of wholesome, tense and silly moments!

Did I also mention it's from YOUR perspective? Yes yes! It's a reader insert story because those are my favorite! I've never made an AO3 account before so this will be interesting. I hope you look forward to it! I sure do. I'm currently finishing up the first chapter as of writing this!

[chronicbeans]

Welcome Home Fae AU x Human Reader (Prologue? Concept?)

While trying to figure out what type of fae folk the other neighbors would be, I kinda came up with this idea if how an x Reader fic might start out. It only really has Wally and the Reader interact, since he is the only fae character I have made, and Eddie is stuck in the Fairy Realm. I just wanted to write it down before I lost it in all my other thoughts. As always, feedback is welcome and appreciated! OwO

TW: Small Mention of Threatened Harm

You watch your father cradle the small baby in his arms, which, in all the years that it has spent in your family, has never grown at all. How many years has it been? Fifteen? Twenty? It doesn't matter exactly. It disturbs and saddens you that this baby, who was acquired before you were even born, has not grown an inch, while you are now an adult.

Your father sighs, rocking in his rocking chair. His hair is a mess and his shirt covered in dirt. "It will be okay, little fella," he says, letting the small babe in his arms grab onto his finger "the wet nurse should be here, soon. Mom may have left, but we can still feed you once the nurse arrives. Isn't that right, (Y/N)?" You weakly smile, nodding "Yeah. She should be here in a couple of minutes. Let me light some candles to warm you up, Liam. I know you don't like fire, so the candles will be a bit better than the fireplace." You hurry over, lighting a few candles as your father mutters a soft "Thank you, sweetie. That would be lovely."

Once you return with the candles, you set them down on the table near your father's rocking chair. He hums, seemingly trying to soothe the now crying baby in his arms. Then, he looks over to you as he asks "Did I ever tell you why I never leave Liam alone?" You nod in response "People want to hurt him, right? They want to hurt him because he never grows." "Yes... but there is more. You see-" the front door to your little cottage resounds as the nurse knocks on it. "I will tell you later. Would you be a dear and go pick some berries from the forest? Some mushrooms, too. I will make us some dinner to eat while we talk."

With that, you take your daily stroll through the woods. Your cartage is close to Faeshire, but not so close as to be able to see the village. There is no path to and from the village from your cottage, either. Your father explained it as a way to protect Liam from the people who wish to hurt him. He even said that it was why he left his mother. She wanted to hurt him, too. The only situation you have heard about that is similar to Liam's is... well, fae folk got involved somehow and messed things up. Despite this, it is clear that your father loves Liam very much, despite his oddities. Who wouldn't? Liam is so sweet and has done nothing wrong...

You are so lost in though, you didn't realize that you were also physically lost in the woods. You look left and right, unable to spot your cottage or Faeshire. You do, however, see a berry bush nearby, deciding that you might as well check them out. They... LOOK edible, but you have never seen them before. Neither have you seen the oddly colored mushroom ring a few feet from the bush, or the singular apple tree a few feet further. Stepping closer the the strange ring, you instantly recognize it as a fairy ring. Blues, reds, yellows and even purples and greens all dust the mushroom tops. You stand a few feet away from the fairy ring, knowing full well that it acts as a transport to the Fairy Realm.

A rustle in the apple tree catches your attention. You look up, expecting to see a squirrel getting ready for winter. It is late autumn, after all. Instead, you see a pair of dark eyes peering through the leaves, as well as a few specks of yellow and blue peeking through. Letting out a yelp, you step back a few paces, causing a snicker to emit from whatever is in the tree. "Hello, human!" A monotone voice says, followed by a few more rustles as the creature climbs down the tree to a lower branch.

Within moments, you finally get to see what it is. A man... no... thing is sitting on a branch. Its yellow skin contrasts its blue hair, which has a few tree branches seemingly tangled or growing alongside it, neatly styled alongside the hair itself. The large, dark eyes stare you down as it grins, a set of pearly white teeth seeming out of place for this clearly inhuman creature. You point to it, your hand shaking as you ask "You are a fae, right? What are you" "Wally Darling, dear human! Do not be afraid. I'm a simple dryad. A kindly dryad. Much better than a pixie or a troll."

You relax slightly. Yes... The dryad are naturally kind, as long as you do not harm the trees. You haven't done so, so this dryad should be kind to you, right? Might as well shoot your shot and see if it can point you in the direction of home, or to Faeshire. Either one is good. "Okay... I am so sorry for asking, Wally, but... Can you help me home? I live in a cottage not far from Faeshire. I lost my way while searching for berries and mushrooms for my father. I am not asking for much more than a simple point of the finger towards either place." He leans back in the tree, resting his back against the bark of the trunk as his legs lie along a large branch. "Hmmm... That should be easy. Too easy. There is something else on your mind, I can tell. A little-big brother, perhaps?" Your eyes widen. How does he know?

He then chuckles as your expression, pointing to you "Here's a little deal for you, human! I know that you want help with his situation. I'll point you in the direction of your cottage, like you asked so kindly for. Once you get home, I'll give you... let's say three days to bring your little-big brother to me. After that, we shall make another deal that gives me something proper in return. The first two days should be spent getting both yourself and your brother prepared for the cold. Then, on the third, simply walk in a straight line through the woods, and I shall put you on course to this exact location. Got it?"

You stand as still as stone, staring up at him. This deal is a bad idea, you know for sure. Deals between humans and fae almost always go wrong. In fact, you are pretty sure they never go right for the human, which... well, you are the human in this deal. The sky is growing darker, though, and the cold is slowly seeping through your cloak to the very marrow of your bones. You didn't dress for the weather, due to only expecting to be out for an hour or so. Soon enough, when the sky goes pitch black with night, the air will freeze you as you wander blindly through the forest. Not only that, but this dryad seems determined to make a deal. Yes, the dryad's are naturally kind to good humans... but what if this one doesn't see you as kind? It may use whatever powers it has to make you even more lost if you don't agree.

"Okay... I agree." It grins, with a smile as wide and sly as a cheshire cat. "Good human. Now, let me see... Over there is the best path. It has the most edible berries and mushrooms, and will lead you straight to your cottage." It points somewhere behind you. As you take a few steps in the direction it pointed in, the dryad calls out "I'll be sure to keep you safe on your way." Then, you hear it scuttle back up its tree.

It was right, as within a mere minute, you have mysteriously arrived home, your basket full of berries and mushrooms and your father holding you tightly. "Never go missing like that again, (Y/N)! I was worried someone might have hurt you, or worse..." "Don't worry, dad. I was just a bit lost. On the bright side, I have brought us a lot of berries and mushrooms for dinner. I don't know what you would make with these... but whatever you make is fine."

You look down into your basket to count how many mushrooms you got, only to be surprised by an odd fruit in the basket. Picking it up, you see a nice, ripe, red delicious apple has somehow found its way into your basket.

[welcomehomeincorrectquotes]

*The Viewer walks in via an oaken door, wearing a cottage core aesthetic, and gives Wally a chocolate covered honeycrisp*

Wally: *gives a tiny gasp and stares at the honey crisp with stars in his eyes* Howdy, look, apple!

Howdy: *looking up from his documents, still snuggled in his new kotasu* That's great, shrimp- wait, was that oak door always there?

[anonymoushouseplantfan]

Episode 4

Royal wedding montage. No, Samantha Cohen didn’t tell you some weird Rainbow Fish story. That did not happen. 

Voices of journalists talking about how amazing she is and how she is going to change the family for the better. I guess the royal coverage is good…as long as they say nice things.

“I don’t know how I was so calm.” Drugs, Meghan. It was drugs. 

Wedding crowds montage. Same song as Four Weddings and a Funeral because these two think they are living a rom com. Celebrities attending the wedding. International coverage. Amal and George and the Beckhams. Will and Harry. No one mentions that it was Wallis Simpson’s car. She didn’t talk about the “real” wedding three days before.

There was no expectation, Harry. You were supposed to get married in Craithie Kirk because you were a man of the people. That was the first story that came out.

CWK talks about the dress. Doesn’t mention the Commonwealth flowers in the veil. No mention of the tiara drama or the egg debacle either. 

Bold choice going with the vampire bride shot. Yes, KC was important to you Meg. He single-handedly saved your train wreck wedding. Lots of discussion about the Kingdom Choir and no one mentions that they perform at all the Commonwealth events. 

They sold their wedding pics, just like Peter. They are soooooo tacky. They laugh about cutting the cake with the sword. That wedding cake was truly symbolic, a priceless collection of gold pedestals propping up a mediocre confection. Her mom ditched her for the celebs. That is hilarious. Of course she did.

Interesting that Meghan hasn’t looked happy once during this whole documentary, but she sounds truly joyful when talking about the wedding. That was the highlight of her life. 

Kate’s face in the wedding pictures is everything. Says it all. I wonder if Meghan sold a Kate pic. I haven’t seen one yet. Never mind, I just rewound and, sure enough, she did.

Interesting how they are appropriating narratives—she’s a hugger, writing in a new character, modernizing—that were created by the tabloids. Every single word this Archewell guy is saying was written by Camilla Tominey, Andrew Morton, or Valentine Low. He is parroting the royal experts Harry was mocking last episode.

Train trip with the Queen. Why does she wear a necklace in some shots, but not in others? They are splicing different interviews and using filters to make it look line one interview. This section was edited into incomprehensibility after the death of the Queen.

Grenfell. LOL, she makes it sound like she was in the UK when the tragedy happened. Wild. I like the Grenfell ladies but why are they spending time on this and not covering her current charities? 

Bitching about Nott Cott, which actually looks super cute. “I don’t know who lived here before.” Your brother, the heir, lived there before, Harry. You know that.

 That’s how she decorated it? Pottery Barn circa 2001? No wonder her domestic goddess career never took off. All of this just to upgrade from 2000s Pottery Barn to 2014 Restoration Hardware? But….they weren’t living in Nott Cott. They rented a Cotswolds farmhouse before the wedding and lived there until moving to Frog Cott. That’s why all these pics are of them getting dressed. They were just using Nott Cott to prep for London events. 

Wait, did they just bitch about their multi-million cottage in Kensington Palace being too small right after the Grenfell segment? Yes, they did. Wow.

Pregnancy. She sold her sonogram pictures. Australia. You weren’t showing already, Megs. There was no bump. Cue shots with no bump. This is epic gaslight. We can clearly see she’s not showing, but they flat out say she was.

Lol, she wasn’t that popular. Her polls peaked at 41% net approval after the wedding and dropped like rocks. And Australia wasn’t the turning point, Lucy. It was her dad talking to the media all summer long. Isn’t Lucy Harper a pr person? Shouldn’t she be able to interpret polling data? Headlines about how popular she was…including the 2018 Time’s Most Influential List, which is hilarious because they were sandwiched between Donald Trump and Saudi Arabia’s MSB. Yeah, the royals were really jealous of that. OMG, they show Meghan’s covers and its…Woman’s Day and Hello! Canada. One of the headlines is “Freddy Mercury’s Secret Wife.” 

Wait, now he’s happy because the media put Meghan on the front pages? They have a very strange relationship with the media. Hold on, he thinks Meghan outshone The Queen? Seriously?????? He thinks the frumpy brocade dress outshone The Queen? I remember calling that a hater cover because Meghan looked so terrible in it. No one thought she overshadowed The Queen. Literally, no one. 

Archewell guy speaking again.  He seems to think that the royals, who were desperately trying to cover up the epic disaster of the Australian tour—which included insulting the Australian government house, exaggerating an incident with a faulty heater, assaulting an embassy employee, walking out of a United Nations event, making a staffer cry in front of a reporter, wearing jewelry gifted by an allegedly murderous despot, and trolling her father by saying he hadn’t paid for her college—were jealous of how “well” she did in Australia. This is delusional.

Lol, now they are bitching about avocados. It wasn’t the avocados. It was her dad. They just jumped from blaming the royals for the bad press to blaming racism. First The Queen was jealous, then the staff were scared, then the media was racist and giving Kate better press…I’m getting whiplash. Pick a villain, guys! I can’t follow this argument at all. The Queen was upset because Meghan stole her Woman’s Day cover with Freddie Mercury’s secret wife so she leaked stories about Meghan’s favorite perishable fruit and the evil tabloids turned that into the racialized avocados of death? Whaaaaaat????? I love how Harry throws up his hands and says “well, if you can’t see it, I can’t do anything for you.” See what? None of this makes any sense.

BTW, they used the “Hurricane Meghan” headlines even though Meghan told Oprah she hadn’t heard about that. The Oprah interview also implied she never knew about the bump-holding headlines and they used those in the documentary too. Oprah read them to her and Meghan acted as if it was the first time she was hearing about it. The only headlines Meghan, according to their statements during the Oprah interview, was supposedly aware of were the “made Kate cry story” and the avocado story, and she laughed at the avocado story.

Walkabout in Liverpool. A member of the public scolded her about her dad. See? The problem was her dad. Harry and Meghan, however, blame family lies and the tabloids. Her dad was giving interviews right and left, and people were watching him in real time, complaining about how he was treated.  No one in the palace was leaking this. No one was lying about it. He was out there, giving interviews to anyone with a couple of bucks because he wanted to explain that he did actually pay for her school. Her sister was doing the same thing.

And here’s the Diana 2.0 stuff. Wait, she was going to kill herself…over the racialized avocados of death? I paused to re-read the transcript of the Oprah interview because I remembered the suicidal ideation story as being a lot more sympathetic than “the Kate story and the avocados made me want to end it all.” In that interview, they start with the tabloid stories, but then Oprah asks her whether she felt lonely and she talks about Harry working all the time and being all alone. She talks about not being able to leave the house and see her friends and also about the tours being exhausting and having to smile through it all. She also claims there were talks about Archie not being a prince and not getting security and how that was stressing her out. Then she talks about people being concerned about Archie’s skin color and then she talks about her suicidal ideation. That kind of emotional build-up is what Oprah brings to the table. That’s why she gets the big bucks. Here, they just jump from “our Australian tour was super successful” to “mean tabloid stories about Kate and avocados” to “I just didn’t want to live anymore,” and it’s not as powerful, particularly since the behind-the-scenes pictures they keep showing us are all happy pictures. 

Also, we skipped over the big show of support at Sandringham.  And Doria can also do the “one tear, left eye” trick. It must be genetic.

She wasn’t allowed to get help? Girl, they knew you were nuttier than a fruitcake. They would have sent you to a shrink in a hot minute. And they weren’t afraid about how it would make the institution look. Harry admitted to going to therapy and it went fantastic. James Middleton went to therapy too. They put up pics of Megs looking sad…and they are all from events that happened afterwards.

The households separated because of leaks? Bullying isn’t even going to get mentioned? No, it isn’t, and neither is the big social media campaign KP did to support Meghan.

I’m blown away by the fact that all this drama is about a story about bridesmaids’ dresses. The Oprah Winfrey interview was motivated by this one story about making Kate cry. The Archetypes podcast was about the story about making Kate cry. They made a six-hour Netflix documentary about a story about making Kate cry. There is now an entire subgenre of royal coverage based on Princess Charlotte’s bridesmaid attire. This one story has been living rent-free in Harry and Meghan’s heads since Fall 2018.

Harry keeps talking about trading stories and not playing the game. He totally planted the Rose Hanbury affair story as revenge for the “made Kate cry” story. Absolutely,

Happy Nott Cott Christmas.  She wasn’t allowed to text photos? Lol, you weren’t texting photos bc you were saving them for Netflix.

People Magazine article. I guess these were the friends working with the magazines. Wasn’t their privacy super important? Weren’t they in danger if their identities were revealed? That was the argument that was presented under oath to the court. Now it turns out she was just saving the reveal for the Netflix special. Baby shower. OMG, Amal Clooney making floral arrangements, wtf? Backlash because of course. 

They are gifted Frogmore Cottage. Archie’s birth. Vintage footage about royal births. She had a long-standing relationship with her UK doctor? How? Seriously, how? They couldn’t do the photocell at Portland Hospital? Didn’t Fergie do it at Portland? Twice?

Birth announcement drama. The problem wasn’t that you broke protocol, Meghan. The problem was that CBS got the exclusive and you lied to the press about the birth. They bring in academics to say it was about racism because of course.

Archie. They took a picture of the nanny with the baby in a mud cloth carrier, lol.

South Africa with Archie. They couldn’t do a hospital photocall with the baby, but now they are taking him on tour. Doria just said “it’s not the institution’s baby, it’s her baby,” but they are taking him on an official tour. They can’t be expected to serve their child on a silver platter for literally two minutes, but they can take him on a week-long tour. I had to double-back and check the dates because I felt this wasn’t nearly as jarring and contradictory when it happened, and it wasn’t. The tour was several months after the birth and they had already taken the baby (who was supposedly too young to fly to Balmoral for the summer) to Ibiza. They way they presented it in the documentary, however, sounded ridiculous.

BTW, no coverage of the Vogue magazine, Smartworks capsule collection, the summer vacations at Elton’s house, the private planes, etc…. All of these were roundly criticized (well, not the Smartworks capsule) and yet the only story that matters is the Kate story.

Lol, the Archewell guy just admitted the royals were afraid Meghan would cause an international row during this tour. Not afraid that she would embarrass the royal family with her activism, noooooo. Afraid she would cause an international row.

Tutu. Wasn’t this footage intrusive two episodes ago? Make up your minds, guys! Tom Bradby. Is she trying to spin the interview as an oopsie due to exhaustion? Is she saying Tom tricked her? She really thinks people are stupid. Also, she takes no responsibility for anything, not even the Uber-narcissistic “I trusted too much.” She’s not even capable of that.

{Edited: Apparently Harry is doing another interview with Bradby. Guess he didn’t really trick them then.]

Astroturfed supportive hashtag. Guess her huge investment in Twitter bots paid off. LOL, my kid squints at the screen and says “all the tweets have the same timestamp.” Yes, they do.

Oh, the Diana footage is a bad idea. You can tell she was trying to act like Diana during the Africa interview (so much eyeliner). They really do think she’s Diana though, and they planned their tours (Australia, Africa, big meeting with African leader, big tour with baby) to bolster that impression. It’s interesting that worthy projects (Smartworks capsule collection, Vogue, Morocco girls’ meetings Ireland tour, dog shelter) that would make Meghan look good, but don’t support the Diana narrative are simply not mentioned. The India hygiene project is not featured in the documentary, but the Diana-like pictures in traditional dress are. 

You Don’t Own Me for closing credits. Hahaha. Harley Quinn music. So appropriate. The music in the last three documentaries is better than the music in the first three. 

Husband and group chat both discuss the Diana 2.0 stuff. She really thinks she is Diana and the documentary is trying to present her as Diana. Everyone agrees that she is no Diana. The psychologist thinks she should have worn more eyeliner. The lawyer tells her that eyeliner wasn’t the problem. There isn’t enough eyeliner in the world to turn her into Diana. Everyone thinks the music is good. Much texting about how much the tiny cottage cost. Someone looks it up on Zillow and it’s an insane number. Many “but my palace was sooooo small” jokes. Many comments about a KP cottage, no matter how small, being much classier than a California McMansion. Many comments about the Archewell guy sounding slimy. 

On to the next episode.

[bluecote]

Alfred Wallis

The White House (Norway Cottage)

C. 1925 -35

[theonetrueblu]

I made a Welcome Home au!!! Meet Familiar's Brew Wally! He is the owner of a gothic cottage core themed cat café!

The au takes place 10 or so years after Welcome Home goes off the air. Wally decided to pursue his love of animals and open a cat café! He's a very tired man, but he loves his cats.