chronicbeans

[chronicbeans]

I've been on a bit of an unannounced social media break, and it's still going on. Just came on here to say that my curse of immediately crushing on a character only for them to immediately die in a brutal manner is still ongoing.

RIP Temperance from The Gaslight District. You immediately died right as I thought you were my ADHD required fandom crush.

Anyways, social media break back on-

[chronicbeans]

Me getting back into To Eat a God after a lot of people started talking about it on Tumblr is so cool. Especially because I've found that the majority seems to love Nulla, meanwhile I'm over here, having been a Septem enjoyer since before the update came out that allowed up to actually visit Septem and Unum's domains. It's really alcohol because I get to see why people would prefer the other characters to him, and kinda figure out how other people pick their favorites in games like these. Currently it's a lot of personality based things, which makes sense because like... yandere visual novel.

Meanwhile, I love to psychoanalyze characters I like and I think Septem has always been this super interesting case to me. Like, I saw him, and was like "why are you like that?", and now that we know he has a puppet (Rafael), I get to have even MORE info to go "oh, so that's part of why you're like that, so why did it turn out this way?"

Long story short, me trying to explain why I like Septem and Rafael the most be like:

[chronicbeans]

I guess I'll break the mold by saying I DESPISE pumpkin pie. That good ol' Thanksgiving/Christmas dessert. I hate it, and I can tell you why.

I used to love it, because I love absolutely everything "pumpkin spice" flavored, and pumpkin pie is literally made with pumpkin spice or the spices that are named pumpkin spices. I am that guy who will drink pumpkin spice lattes all of autumn just because I KNOW I won't be able to get them during other seasons and I will miss them.

However, one Thanksgiving, I had the most WATERY, BLAND, AND DISGUSTING pumpkin pie in my life. I am big on texture, and that stuff was disturbing. Like, it was watery, lumpy, and not even flavorful? And the crust was soggy, making me creeped out that it might be raw. Then, the next year, the filling wasn't as watery, but it was still lumpy and bland.

Ever since, I've hated pumpkin pie... I just can't eat it anymore, because my stomach gets queasy. Lol

What’s a food from your culture that u HATE #hatersonly

[chronicbeans]

I love making designs for characters that we don't know anything about, be it their appearance or just in general. Like, you have so much free will to make them look however you want, or if you want to challenge yourself, you can even try to make sure they fit in with the world around them.

With this in mind I now must make as many Skiddad designs before Sr Pelo gives him a canon one. Everybody makes him look pretty similar but I'm going to break the mold by giving him glasses! /hj

[chronicbeans]

Alright, so that last post was a joke, but this is genuinely like the 5th time I've genuinely thought about becoming a clown but never went through with it. So my late New Year's resolution is to at least try doing some clown makeup. Balloon animals and costumes are out of my budget but I do have some face paint.

Idk it'll at least give me SOMETHING to do to distract myself. OwO

[chronicbeans]

Everyday I stray further from God and closer to the mental breakdown that shall have me spiral into becoming a birthday clown.

[chronicbeans]

Hey this might be a strange request but can somebody help me find a show/game/any media that has clowns in it that are actually nice and cute? I've already seen TADC and that's not really what I mean. I want a piece of clown media where the clown actually CLOWNS, not just someone who happens to look like a clown.

My ass is still reeling from the TikTok ban going on and I want silly clowns to cheer me up, but trying to find some all I get are scary clowns. Like it may be Spooky Month 24/7 in my household but I'm burnt out from scary clowns and want a change of pace.

Plus I've always kinda preferred regular clowns. Idk what's wrong with me.

[chronicbeans]

Tik Tok is unavailable in the USA right now, so my friend and I are texting each other in pure hysteria at the moment. OwO

"SAVE ME POOKIE SAVE ME" will forever be in my vocabulary now for when I'm distressed.

[chronicbeans]

Hey so I randomly thought of how stigmatized a particular group of mental illnesses still are, even in the community of people who go "we're accepting of mental illness ❤️". That group being Cluster B personality disorders. It's honestly really irritating sometimes when I think about it, especially because I do have family members that are in the Cluster B community, even if I'm not myself (at least, my therapist hasn't brought it up to me and I have no reason to suspect I am). It's genuinely so hard to find information on Cluster B disorders that either isn't a medical paper filled with confusing terminology, includes pop psychology terminology, or doesn't stigmatize the community further, that I sometimes feel like I don't even know my family members well enough to support them through their struggles. Which is DEPRESSING AF to think about.

I just want to let my followers and any who see this post know that this blog is accepting and actively trying to learn the TRUTHS about Cluster B disorders, especially from the people who have them. I may mess up from time to time and say something stupid, but it's not from malice or hatred, just me genuinely not knowing. It especially doesn't help that it's so stigmatized and pop psychology terminology is unfortunately a thing, one so common I've found many websites that claim to be made by psychologists using these terms despite them not being officially recognized or made to grift people. As much as I may be accepting, I wouldn't be a safe space if I wasn't willing to learn about the people I want to provide a safe space for. And luckily, I've always been a curious person, so I'm more than willing.

If I ever do say something, don't be afraid to correct me, since I'm always willing to learn from mistakes and learn about other people (in fact I'm sure I've messed up a few times already, just statistically with how common those people psych terms are I'm bound to have mistaken one as being real..). I just don't actively ask people because I don't want to be someone who's going around asking too personal questions on accident. Going around and asking people about their mental or physical health isn't the best way to make someone feel safe, but so many people seem to think it is for some reason. So here's my invitation to correct me if you feel comfortable doing so, I'll be happy to hear from you!

If anybody who doesn't have a Cluster B personality disorder but are accepting and open to learning more about people who do want to, you can reblog this post.

I'm not usually one of those people who make posts saying "reblog this post if [blank]" since I know I'd feel like I'm reblog baiting, so I'm not going to word it like that. However, I genuinely do want people to find their safe spaces and for others to learn how they can make their blogs feel safe by actually listening to people in the Cluster B community and not articles that may, unintentionally or not, stigmatize them. I feel it's important for people to be able to feel safe with a good variety of people regardless of their mental or physical health status, but it's also good to let people know if you're a safe space for them but aren't a part of their community, in case they have had bad experiences and aren't ready or don't feel comfortable interacting yet.

[chronicbeans]

I got art markers for the first time today! The first thing I had to try drawing is, of course, my OCs lmao! Took a while before I got him correct but this is the best version I made!

I'm still figuring out the markers and coloring in general (I rarely color my sketches), but I'm proud with how my first finished attempt turned out! Also don't mind my terrible camera quality my phone sucks.

Update: He's my profile pic now.

[chronicbeans]

My horror loving mind has been very curious about something. There's this whole horror cliche I like to call "we just opened this thingy here and we didn't see what was expected". So, I want to see between these two options I've been thinking of, what would be more frightening out of the two.

Scenario 1: You've been good friends with someone for a few years. However, one day, they get into a bad accident. Instead of seeing flesh and bones, you see that they haven't been human this entire time. Instead, they're made of some form of inorganic material (metal, rocks, wires, etc.).

Scenario 2: You just bought a new cellphone. It works perfectly, and you love it more than your old one. One day, after a few months, you drop it, and to your surprise there's red liquid coming out. You open it up to try to see what is going on, and inside is fleshy, organic material.

I'm mostly just curious because I see these two cliches a lot and they have a lot of similarities, but I'm pretty sure the horror factor for each is extremely different. The types of attachments people have to one another vs their electronics is completely different, so I'm interested in seeing which would terrify people more.

[chronicbeans]

YIPPEE!!! I haven't seen this show but it's always nice to see a friend's doodles on my dashboard!

finally started watching pantheon !! here’s a caspian doodle for your troubles :]

[chronicbeans]

Now that New Years is Over it's back to Halloween Season!

That's how my family is. And I started hyperfixating on Spooky Month again right after New Years-

[chronicbeans]

Wicked vs Barbie Marketing

Just so everybody knows this isn't necessarily a CRITICISM of either movie's marketing, but I just realized something! Both the Barbie Movie and Wicked had semi similar marketing strategies, but nobody really complained about Barbie's as much as Wicked's. I'm sure people complained, but it wasn't as much as I've seen for Wicked. So, I thought I'd write something, because I think I might've figured out why that might be, or at least a part of why.

Also, I'm a bit sick with a fever and my mind is constantly scattered, so this might not be that organized. I'm actually partly writing this to distract myself from my headache. Sorry if it's hard to understand at times!

So, for transparency, I haven't seen Wicked or Barbie. I couldn't afford to go to Barbie and I just wasn't interested in Wicked. I haven't seen the Wicked musical or book, either. This is entirely about the marketing campaigns and is trying to be as unbiased about the actual movies because... well, I haven't seen them.

However, for the marketing, I will say my thoughts on it because it does have importance to the point I'm trying to make. I felt like I completely avoided the Barbie marketing campaign, while I was a bit annoyed by the Wicked campaign. The keyword there was felt. I was completely fine with the Barbie movie ads and collabs being on my feed and didn't even notice it, but was very annoyed when everything turned pink and green for Wicked.

To try to sum up my feelings on the Wicked campaign, the best I can say is that I just grew very tired very quickly. It wasn't the dramas surrounding the movie, either. I just grew tired of Wicked shoes, Wicked food, Wicked soap, Wicked everything! It felt like something I wasn't interested in was being forced onto me. Because of that, I think I actually feel less inclined to see the movie (which sucks, because I hear it's good and I'm just not able to afford to go watch a musical and the book doesn't interest me). I never felt that way with Barbie and haven't seen these sorts of complaints, but I think I figured out why.

It wasn't that Barbie's marketing was less aggressive, for a lack of a better term. It's that most people are used to Barbie marketing. Barbie has been a toy like for a long time, so people know her! As a 2000's kid, I remember walking into the girl's toy aisle and a good half of the items there were Barbie branded. We are used to Barbie make-up, Barbie hair accessories, Barbie clothes and even Barbie foods because it's been around for so long! A lot of people have Barbie nostalgia, have watched the animated movies and such... Barbie is just a thing that's been in the background, in a way?

It wasn't that I avoided the Barbie movie campaign, it's just that I was so used to the Barbie brand being aggressive in it's marketing and collabs I didn't even notice it. However, I hadn't even heard of Wicked before outside of Twisted being a Starkid parody of it the musical. I'm pretty sure that Wicked is a lot more niche compared to Barbie, and before the movie, was mostly something that a lot of people into musicals know about more than the average person. So, when Wicked started using a similar marketing strategy, it felt a lot more obvious. It's something a much smaller group of people would know about despite the musical and book being out for a long while, so a lot of people's first exposure to Wicked was this campaign, and it seemed like it was being pushed heavily. If not, more heavily marketed than the Barbie Movie, despite that not necessarily being the case.

In short, I think people were just more desensitized to Barbie than Wicked, and more people have an attachment to Barbie than Wicked. So, people either didn't notice how aggressively Barbie was being marketed or if they did, they didn't care. Meanwhile, with Wicked, people aren't as attached and aren't used to Wicked being marketed like this. So, the reactions were very different.

Personally, I think I'm getting a bit more relaxed about Wicked's marketing now that I've realized this. I still won't see the movie since the premise just isn't something that interests me, but I'm no longer irritated whenever I see something silly, like "Wicked Mac and Cheese". Now I just laugh at it instead of rolling my eyes, which I guess means that Wicked has brought me some joy in my own way. Maybe not through the movie, but for some good laughs.

[chronicbeans]

Me trying to write fanfics when I'm perfectly healthy (or as healthy as someone with chronic illness can be):

Me, suffering with a fever, writing an essay on something I don't care about for zero reason other than I thought of something I think is interesting:

[chronicbeans]

🎉✨HAPPY NEE YEARS✨🎉

Here's a bunch of gifs I found by looking up New years/New years resolutions, some of which are not entirely related to New Years.

Why not make a post about my resolutions? Because I don't have any because I never fulfill them when I do. 😊

[chronicbeans]

The entire reason I saw Sonic 2 and Sonic 3 was for Agent Stone and Robotnik ngl. Also, thanks for the box of cursed Sonic plushies!

we saw the yaoi movie

no seriously. why was this movie so gay.

(( @chronicbeans ))