#Egoistic Flame

[touhoutunes]

Title: 希望の星 (Star of Hope)

Arrangement: きりん

Vocals: 弟の姉

Album: Egositic Flame 

Circle: EastNewSound

Original: The Sea that Reflects One's Home Planet

[jasper-rolls]

Song: 紅煙月下、惨生ノ絶 (Beneath the Red Smoke Moon, The Miserable Life's Severance) Artist: nayuta Composer: 黒鳥 (Blackbird) Album: Egoistic Flame Circle: EastNewSound

[ddarker-dreams]

In Life, In Death.

Enver Gortash x F Reader.

Warnings: Unhealthy relationships, obsessive behavior, imbalanced power dynamics, manipulation and brief mentions of blood. Word count: 2k.

Control. 

In all its variations, this word is what you associate most with the tyrant hiding in plain sight — Lord Enver Gortash.

If it’s an art form, then he’s a virtuoso. The invisible score he weaves needn’t hypnotize the listener, no, they are drawn in willingly. Lured by innocuous and diabolical plans, shackled into place by unchecked ambition. Though they may feel unique in their role, to him, they’re little notes that shall fall silent once the page is turned. 

The full vision behind the overture is unknown to even you. From the snippets you’ve overheard, it leaves a sinister impression. Discordant harmonies promise a dark future. 

You thought you’d find satisfaction in stilling his tongue. You dreamt of the day, yearned for it, like a bride one night away from walking down the aisle. From your current vantage point, you should be seconds away from fully realizing this goal. The control he exudes over himself and others can’t be infallible. Nothing is. 

If the gods can bleed, then so can he. 

If the gods can die, then so can he. 

If your fellow man can kill, then so can you. 

“One thing’s for certain, dearest,” he comments, his tongue unfettered as ever, “Our evenings together are never dull.” 

Contrary to your wishes, it’s you who is rendered speechless. 

You are hovering above him, the long skirt of the nicest dress you own rising to accommodate the uncomfortable position. Beneath you lies a man whose dark eyes inspire more trepidation across your features than what’s reflected in his own. A perfect politician’s smile accentuates the bags beneath them. The brief struggle — if it can even be described as such — has left his hair more tousled than usual. It’s splayed out against the wooden floorboards of his study. 

When he speaks, his Adam’s apple rises dangerously close to the blade kissing his skin. This is made riskier by how shaky the implement is in your hands. 

“Breathe, darling,” he instructs, stoking your frustration. Only he would have the audacity to make commands of the person holding him at knifepoint. “You’re seconds shy from passing out in a nervous fit. That would be counterproductive to your designs, I take it?” 

Your nostrils flare. “You want to enter the afterlife making insufferable quips?” 

He considers you for a long moment. 

“The delay’s left me with little else to do.” 

“‘Delay,’” you scoff. Your grip around the hilt tightens. “A self-important egoist to the end.” 

“You’ve made up your mind, then?” 

“Long ago.” 

“Hm,” he hums, the low sound resonating in his chest. “I wonder about that. Fantasizing over my death in your head is a far cry from enacting it out yourself.” 

Your eyes narrow into slits. You want to dismiss this as a petty taunt, but you both know that isn’t the case. It’s why his tone lacks condescension — he’s pointing out a fact. Everything is hitting you simultaneously like you’re being doused in an icy pale of water. The soft smile on his face, the steady rise and fall of his chest, how level-minded he remains despite what should be a looming threat.

Then there’s you. 

Sweat beading down your temples, your breathing erratic and your stomach twisting into knots. You’re acutely aware that outside the heavy mahogany doors stands a legion of Banite fanatics. Some disguised as Flaming Fists, the others choosing not to bother. At Gortash’s command, they’d have no difficulty subduing you. The agonies that’d await afterward… you shake your head, willing the thought from your mind. 

Your eyes flicker to the two golden chalices sitting atop his desk. Wanting to build up courage, you downed most of yours, whereas he nursed his. In retrospect, your uncharacteristic indulgence should’ve warned him that something was off. He, playing the kindly host, always offered a vintage bottle during your tête-à-têtes. You rarely took him up on the offer. Alcohol dulls the senses, which you need to keep razor-sharp in his presence. 

“... You saw this coming, didn’t you?” 

Gortash exhales sharply, his eyes gleaming with entertainment. “I expected some form of retaliation. I am the reason your less clever co-conspirators are idling away in the dungeons instead of scurrying about.” 

This makes you bristle.

“They’re my friends, not ‘co-conspirators,’” you hiss, leaning down to glare at him closer. “And they’ve done nothing to earn such a… a… ridiculous sentence! Libel? Treason? Sedition, of all things? What’s next? Blasphemy?” 

“It could be arranged.” 

“Bastard,” you growl. 

“It’s a jest, dear, a simple jest,” he takes a deep breath when you apply pressure to his solar plexus. His eyebrows pinch together from the pain and he coughs. He strains to speak again, though his cadence is unsettlingly calm. “My girl, there’s a great deal in this world you’re ignorant to. Ironic though it may sound now, there was dissatisfaction over your pacifism. Dissatisfaction that almost gave way to drastic measures.” 

Gortash takes your silence as reason to continue. “The Dark Lord and I are in agreement upon your value. The same cannot be said regarding your… compatriots. They lack your finesse — your practicality. Their single-minded pursuit of ‘justice’ had them poking their nose where it doesn’t belong. I can’t abide by such behavior.” 

You grit your teeth. “Then you should’ve come to me, so I could resolve the problem.” 

His response is immediate, requiring no forethought. 

“You’re soft-hearted. Charitable where you should be strict. Why else would they feel emboldened enough to act against your wishes?” 

“I…!” 

He speaks your name, effectively silencing you.

“Answer me this,” his eyes bely a certain intensity that has you swallowing thickly. “How would you see this city become the shining utopia you long so desperately for it to be? Free of poverty, corruption, and injustice?” 

“That’s never the standard I’ve aspired for,” you reply. “If it was, I never would’ve swallowed my pride and worked alongside you. Progress comes in increments. The ills that plague Baldur’s Gate aren’t chronic, the proper alms can lessen the symptoms. Righting the city’s massive wealth disparity is where I’d start.” 

He smiles at you, his eyes creasing with fondness. “My dear, the rich would sooner surrender their souls than their wealth. It’s intrinsic. When faced with outside pressure, they will exert their own, and it will hurt.” 

“I’m aware of the risks.” 

“Are you, though?” He challenges. His voice grates your ears like a drunkard’s warbling. “Your resolve is commendable — I’ll give you that. I have no doubt you’re every ounce of the bleeding heart you present yourself to be. And therein lies the issue. You can’t quell dissent with a slap on the wrist. The bones are better broken, so the hand can never rise against you again.” 

You roll your eyes. “Spoken like a true tyrant.”  

“Is tyranny so terrible?” Gortash cranes his neck upward, forcing you to move your weapon back, lest it break skin. “When I assume the role of Archduke, I won’t inflict suffering for suffering’s sake. The common folk, when left to their own devices, scramble about like livestock; beholden to superfluous pursuits and preyed on with ease. A little order would serve them well.” 

This song and dance rings familiar. 

In undermining his political aspirations, you found your paths crossing more than you would’ve preferred. It’s these ‘coincidental’ meetings that bore what he labels an alliance. You call it a temporary truce. Funds found themselves in the coffers of almshouses, orphanages, and other charitable programs in exchange for your cooperation. Cooperation being loosely defined as a more subtle subterfuge. 

You wet your lips. When did your mouth go so dry? 

“... Truthfully, I’ve never understood why you let a thorn such as myself remain in your side. These aims of yours would’ve been achieved easier with my death.” 

Outside, a bell tolls, revealing the time to be six in the evening. The window pane behind his desk barely muffles the sound of city life. There’s the clank of metal meeting metal and the thumps of arrows finding their targets as the Flaming Fist train. Children can be heard advertising the latest installment of Baldur's Mouth Gazette. A fellow bard strums his lyre and recounts daring tales from Avernus. 

It’s for these folk that you’ve toiled endlessly. You’ve always held the belief that one can rise beyond the circumstances of their birth, so long as they have the resources available to them. It’s a matter of where they get those resources. Amidst the Mistress of the Revels’ enclave, like you, from the Nine Fingers, or worse, among The Dead Three. The options are infinite yet few are good. 

“The answer’s identical to the doubt plaguing you know — ‘what if I’m offing the lesser evil?’” 

Swifter than you can comprehend, his gauntleted hand seizes your wrist. Before a spell can leave your lips, he brings the blade closer, allowing it to nick his skin. Your eyes widen as droplets of crimson gather and trickle down his neck. The setting sun’s rays reflect against the silver weapon, nearly blinding you. When your eyes readjust, you find something about his expression different. Heavier.

“I’ve seen to it that in the event of my death, no harm would befall you,” he speaks without wincing, despite the blade’s tip penetrating his skin. “My estate, research, and Steel Watch; they’d be yours. Whatever painfully altruistic means you put them to are at your discretion.” 

It feels like the air’s been forcefully squeezed from your body. “A bold lie.” 

“In my desk’s bottom-most right drawer, you’ll find a copy of my will proving the opposite.” 

“To what end?” The question comes out breathless. “You’d throw away your life’s work to— to prove a point?” 

He chuckles darkly. “My girl, your ignorance is as endearing as it is perplexing. You can’t see it? The fascination I hold for you that’d drive me to such extremes? My blatant favoritism?” 

Gortash’s grip around your wrist tightens. 

“A death by these untarnished hands…  I’d claim what remains of your innocence for myself. A prize worth the price of admission into the afterlife.” 

Your head aches, throbbing like your brain itself is being squeezed. You break out into a cold sweat. Favoritism? Is that what this is? Can such debauchery align with the word? It’s painfully obvious now; the amusement your indecision provides him. That, along with someone else. Something foreign. A sweet concept that most spend entire lifetimes chasing, twisted into an omen. 

He says your name with enough reverence to stir envy among the divine.

“What shall it be, darling? My ironclad rule or your fleeting paradise?” 

“...” 

Your hand falls limp. 

You wordlessly move to accommodate as he props himself up. Gortash cleans the blood off your knife with a handkerchief. Next, his ornamented fingers find the hair loosened from your updo during the struggle, tucking the stray pieces behind your ear. The interaction feels like it lasts a lifetime. Warily, you eye the weapon in his non-dominant hand. There’s still a chance that this is a ploy, meant to humiliate you in a final violent act. 

As if sensing your thoughts, he raises an eyebrow. “Out of consideration for our partnership, I’ve never done you any harm, have I?” 

“Physical harm is but a single category,” you murmur, the words notably sluggish. 

“True enough,” is his blasé response. He holds his palm open, as if expecting you to relinquish something. When you remain still, he sternly utters your name. “Give me your hand.” 

You obey his command. 

The gold metal forming his claw-like gauntlet is cold against your skin. He closely scrutinizes your hand, manipulating it so he catches every angle. This dedication reminds you of when he’s tinkering with a new invention. The mental notes he takes, how he maps out dimensions and improvements for future iterations. It could be paranoia, but you swear he studies your ring finger with special interest. 

Slowly, while looking you straight in the eye, he presses an open-mouthed kiss against the bruise forming on your wrist.

“Now that that’s settled… was there anything else on your agenda for the evening?” 

[dashitsxx]

i'll wait for your love | gojo satoru x fem!reader | (I)

summary. If only you had given attention to the emotions your boyfriend felt in your relationship, it would have never reached to this point.

genre. angst. sfw.

word count. 1.4k

warnings. modern au. messy plot. in an established relationship. toxic relationship. toxic!gojo. mean!gojo. toxic!reader. prob workaholic!reader. inconsiderate behaviour. mentions of actions of neglect/abandonment (reader). invalidation of feelings (reader & gojo). fighting. mentions of past arguments. cursing. yelling/shouting. a bit of egoistic behaviour (reader). miscommunication. abrupt toxic break-up. party. light drinking.

disclaimer. Please note that this work is entirely fictional. It is not intended to condone, glorify, or encourage any form of violence, illegal activity, or harmful behaviour. All characters (credits to the manga artists), scenarios, and events are products of the author's imagination and/or used in a fictional manner. Any resemblance to actual persons or real events is purely coincidental. The purpose of this work is to entertain and provoke thought, not to promote harmful behaviour.

notes. ngl, i love ariana's eternal sunshine :(( it's her best album, i fear! her songs are so pretty especially this one--but i might have probably used the painful interpretation in this song, but i kind of didn't like the plot i thought tho... but anw, have fun!! also, there might be a possibility of continuation of this one-shot. not sure about it yet :))

"You know what? Fuck you," Satoru cursed at you aggressively as he stormed out of the living room. Your jaw dropped, taken back by what your partner said. Did he just curse you? He did. He just told you to go off. You feel your blood boiling, you cocked your jaw as you pursued his steps to the bedroom.

You push the door open forcefully as Gojo sits on the bed with his head in his hands.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" You questioned him firmly with crossed arms. However, he didn't give any response to you while you waited. Annoyance soared through your body as you spoke in the same emotion you were currently feeling, "Do you have a problem with me? Talk to me, Gojo. You are really pissing me off!"

A huge snort left Gojo's lips as he lifted his head, tilting it in the process. " 'What's wrong with me?' That's what you are asking? God, Y/N," he vexes at you. This time, your expression transforms into confusion, which makes your boyfriend feel exasperated. "You really don't know?"

He turns his head away from you while your expression remains unchanged. "It's always like this, isn't it? You don't even know…" A sudden pang shoots through your chest as you hear a trembling tone in his voice. What does he mean? You wonder. What have you done wrong? You walk closer to him but keep a certain distance. "Please, Satoru, talk to me."

Another snort leaves his lips and looks up at you, behind his bright ocean eyes were burning in rage red flames. He was angr—no, furious.

"You are so unbelievable. I can't even imagine why I am still dating you."

Your current emotional state was abruptly replaced by a look of shock, causing your mouth to hang open and your eyes to widen. The corner of your lips twitched as you exclaimed, "Why are you getting so angry at me for no reason? What's wrong with you?" Your voice rose in volume as you spoke.

"For no reason?!" Gojo stood up abruptly, deathly glaring into your eyes. "I am fucking infuriated because of you!"

"Then, what the hell did I do? I have never done anything wrong!"

"Yes, you did!"

"What is it?!"

"You abandoned me!"

Pain flashed through your eyes as the tension brewed more bitter in the atmosphere. Stinging silence surged between the both of you, but a heave of breaths sounded in the room. What did he mean?

"I—w-what?" You stutter, yet your boyfriend sarcastically chuckles. "Remember the time when I booked us for dinner? I waited for 2 hours, but you never came. Why? Work. Oh, how about the other time when I asked you to pick me up? Another 2 hours wasted, again. Why again? Work again! What a world record!" His hands turn into fists as veins pop off underneath his skin.

"Also, the time when I fucking needed you the most because I was going through something—where were you? Over at the club, having fun with you coworkers and just getting fucking wasted, just for me to bring you back home." There was a bitter taste present in his voice.

You shake your head as you approach him carefully. "I-I never mean—" But he cuts you off and dares to continually speak.

"By the way, I love the part where you just went batshit crazy on me for no reason last week! I love the time you stormed out and ignored me for the whole day while in the same house. I love it, really. Now, who is being unreasonable between us?" Gojo gives you a full hand clap as if you have achieved something innovative. A puzzled expression was displayed on your face, you didn't know how to react or what to say. You didn't know Gojo was feeling this way, well, he should have told you sooner then.

You opened your mouth shakily and asked, "Why didn't you tell me before?"

A loud, ridiculing sound escaped Satoru's lips. "It's because you never listened," he gritted through his teeth. This time, you rolled your eyes. "I would have listened if you had told me sooner."

He placed his hands on his waist, making a mocking face and said, "Well, I tried! And you never did! Because you are so focused on your stupid work!" You noticed his voice raising in volume and his words made your blood boil hotter. "Stupid work? I work because I want us to live a life where we do not have to worry about money! I work for us to have food on the table! Are you not proud I do that for you, for us?!"

"I don't even give a shit about the money!"

"But I do! I want to live a comfortable life!"

"But how about me? Have you ever thought about my feelings, Y/N?! My feelings."

You clamp your mouth shut and bite the insides of your cheek, unsure what to say. The once-forgotten silence lingers once again. A sudden urge to escape emerged in you and honestly, you were tired of this arguing with Satoru. With that, you let out a defeated sigh.

"I don't want to talk anymore, Satoru. Come on, let's go to bed. We can talk about it tomorrow morning," you attempt to persuade him, yet your boyfriend widens his enchanting eyes in disbelief. He couldn't believe you.

Satoru gave a sarcastic laugh as he mutters the word, 'unbelievable.' This only made you frown as you walked closer to him. You reach your arm out to touch him, but before you are even an inch closer, he aggressively slaps it away. Your jaw dropped open at his action and this time—something in you snapped.

Shouts after shouts echoed in the room, bursting in anger. Words were thrown against each other. The stress accumulated from the relationship and work got the best of you.

"I'm done with you. I'm fucking leaving you," Gojo walks out of the bedroom and you sit down on the bed, placing your head in your hands. "Go on then, like I care." You utter under your breath. You were so exhausted and your throat was feeling sore because of the yells you voiced out a while ago.

A huge bang reverberated throughout the entire house, which indicated that your boyfriend left the house. You lift your head before a tired sigh escapes your lift. You didn't want to deal with all the stress you are currently feeling instead you brushed it off by settling yourself into bed. You figured that Satoru would be back in the morning.

However, you were wrong.

A year later...

You take a sip of your wine as you give a huge grin towards the capturing camera, flashing brightly in your direction. You giggled as your friends cracked a laugh. Conversations continued before you informed them to leave for some breeze.

There were some hazy-looking objects as you tipsily walked, the wine glass being supported by the hold of your hand. It took you a while to find a room with a balcony til you encountered an open door. Currently, you were invited to an event hosted by your company in a 5-star hotel. You were definitely enjoying the night you deserved. However, you got a bit carried away with your alcohol intake.

Your heels clack against the floor as you enter the empty room before proceeding to the balcony. You sigh in contentment once the wind brushes your face, your hair dancing with it. You lift your head up to stare at the gleaming light between the vast ocean of darkness and luminary clusters. The moon had a very light shade of blue around its rim as your eyes continuously gazed at it.

You leaned your arms on the railings of the balcony. No matter how you try to push them to the back of your mind, even the celestial body reminds you of him. That darn white and blue shade, you curse.

Nevertheless of your daydreaming of missing him, progressive footsteps vibrate through the ground, which you had not given attention to.

Until they spoke, "Y/N."

Your eyes widened at the familiar voice behind you as you turned your body to find the source of the voice you were now facing upfront. A disbelief expression replaced the tranquillity you felt a while ago. You feel your body nervously shake at the figure in front of you, not in fear but in anxiety. You shakily move your mouth as you utter the name you have never attempted to leave your lips.

"Satoru."

all dividers are from @/cafekitsune, thank you <33

[elegantjellyfishwerewolf]

Zhen is not worthy of the title "dragon warrior"!

Consider this mini-post an addition to this huge post with an overview of the fourth part. And my first complaint about Zhen is that she is selfish. It's just that Jen never cared about the fate of China. She participated in the Chameleon's plan to conquer China and she didn't care that a lot of people might die in the course of this conquest. And in the end, Zhen goes over to Po's side not because she is worried about possible victims, but because the Chameleon does not appreciate her (What a surprise!)! And the first thing Zhen does when she goes over to Po's side is to try to persuade him to run away. Indeed! Let's forget about the Chameleon and China, which will burn with blue flames because of Jen, because she helped the Chameleon to get the staff! I just think that a candidate for the role of a dragon warrior should be concerned not only about the lives of his friends and family, but the lives of all residents of China in general.

And the confrontation between Zhen and Chameleon looks mediocre. Because in the end, we are told that Po had everything under control, and if Zhen had failed, nothing terrible would have happened. It's like if Shifu came out to us at the end of the first part and said, "Well, actually, I pretended that I couldn't handle Tai Lung so that Po could prove himself. So if Po had lost, I could have easily fixed it." Because of this, the hero's act is not felt, because now we know that there was no risk, well, why did I worry about the hero then if he always had a "lifeline".

In general, it's easy to go up against the main villain when you have support in the person of a dragon warrior and a cool magic staff behind your back. I'll just remind you that Po went against Tai Lung with only an empty scroll.

If you look at it that way, the Wolf Boss's act when he disobeyed Shen looks more heroic and strong than what Zhen did. At least because the Wolf did not have a magic staff and support in the person of a dragon warrior. And he went against the main villain not because his master turned out to be an asshole who did not appreciate him, but because there was a direct threat to his pack from the villain (and as for me, contradicting Shen is much scarier than challenging a Chameleon who can only throw you down the stairs).

So this is just my opinion, but for me, Zhen is an egoist who has never worried about possible civilian deaths and who defected to Po because her former employer did not appreciate her.

[thefiery-phoenix]

YANDERE MANAGER KIM HEADCANONS

Words cannot do justice how much I simp for this man, please why are the Lookism verse characters so good looking😭

With the sort of nonsense he's had to endure during his lifetime battling yakuza bosses and gangsters and unruly teenagers with the ego complex larger than Zeus himself, he has a pretty good reason to be protective and possessive and obsessive of you. The man here just wants to keep you safe at all costs no matter what and will do anything to ensure your safety, even if it means getting his hands dirty, for the sake of you to be happy. He just genuinely loves you. A lot to the extent that he's willing to murder people over it

He might have a stoic and aloof exterior and personality at times but he's a soft man at heart. He's someone who understands the passion of romance and he'll feel the flame of love igniting deep within his soul whenever he thinks of you. After all he's the one who's convinced Warren to love someone even if it's only temporary because in his opinion, a man truly becomes a beast and most powerful when he has a loved one to protect. This ex soldier here was quite lonely for a while without having a partner. He didn't really want to have a partner with raising his daughter Minji and him being worried about how she'd adapt to the new changes. However when Minji suggested he find himself a partner he was stunned to hear that from his daughter and decides to give it a shot anyway

A few days later he bumps into you, you work at the local bakery downtown and the second he steps inside your bakery, he's surrounded with warmth and the heavenly scent of baked goods lingering in the atmosphere as a soft smile forms on his face when his eyes land on you. You were busy baking some muffins and you had a pretty apron around your waist as you spotted him and waved towards him. When you smiled at him politely and greeted him and noted down his order, which was a red velvet cake with 2 blue berry muffins and 2 chocolate chip cookies, you mentioned that it might take a while to make. He didn't mind waiting honestly, it would give him an excuse to be in your bakery more and admire you. He struck up a light conversation with you and found growing attached to you rather quickly. However he did get slightly concerned when you told him that you lived alone, why would you live alone? There are so many dangerous things happening around the area in the country and you're living alone? That's something he's not too thrilled to hear about

You hand him his order in a box as your soft warm fingers brushes against his rough large calloused ones and he feels something warm creeping up inside him. A fuzzy warm feeling, a familiar spark and jolt of electricity and passion that he thought he might never get to feel before. His heart twinged slightly as he bade you a goodbye and sighed as he walked out of your bakery. However he started heading over to your bakery everyday, sometimes just to make conversation with you since he does find your company and presence rather pleasant. He doesn't want to burden you with the stories of his past from when he was Code 66 back during his military days nor does he want to tell you that he works at the white tiger job center for a certain fighting obsessed lunatic since he doesn't want to scare you off. He wants to protect you and shelter you from the bad things that keep happening. He can see the glimmer of innocence in your eyes, something that's quite rare these days since most people he's encountered were just plain egoistic corrupt people. But you're so different...a ray of sunshine in a dark world filled with chaos and entropy

He's an ex soldier with God tier fighting and detective skills. He'll ask Hansu to find out some information regarding you, ignoring the teasing from Jincheol about how he's fallen head over heels in love with you already. He just sighs and pointedly looks at him but he doesn't deny it. Hansu will end up finding everything about you in less than an hour and he'll have pages and pages of your biodata for Kim to take a look at. Kim knows he's being a bit out of line here but he just can't help but be curious. If you're in any kind of trouble or whatever he'll take care of the problem quickly. If someone's harassing after you or you have a creepy landlord, well good news for you because you don't need to pay your rent next month. Just ignore the broken bones and the bruises on the landlord given to him by a certain man who comes over to your bakery everyday

Have you seen this man fight? His kill ratio is insane, there's a reason people shiver when they're facing him against a fight. He might be soft and affectionate and warm towards you but when it comes to dealing with people to protect you, he'll be absolutely ruthless and will give zero damns who he's up against. He'll use his string and his fighting skills and put that person in the hospital for a while. Or just straight up murder them, depends on the sort of crime they do to you. Either way he will not relax or let it go if someone messes with you and harms even a single strand of hair on your pretty little head. When he goes on a murder rampage, not even Hansu and Jincheol would be able to stop him which is why they just let him do his own thing. Oh, and speaking of Hansu and Jincheol, congratulations, you now have them both looking out for you as well

His obsessive and possessive feelings for you would start when he feels like you're in danger from something. He'll invite you to stay over at his house for a few days and you can't even refuse him because the way he speaks will make you doubt yourself whether or not you're truly able to take care of yourself. You don't get a choice in this matter, you're staying with him and that's final. It's also a good time to introduce you to Minji. However little did you know, both father and daughter were obsessed with you. Minji greets you with a polite smile and she's finally glad she got to meet the person who's made her dad happy. She's another one who's willing to do whatever the hell it takes to ensure you'll stay with her dad. She's a sneaky one, if your coworkers are messaging you things she's not too pleased about, she'll sneakily delete their number from your phone and make it seem like you blocked them on social media. You're supposed to be with her dad, not some other undeserving person

Breakfast, lunch and dinner include you sitting with them and having your meal. Of course, no phone during that special time. Kim would love to do the cooking, he'll cook the best meals ever to ensure you have a good meal. He does get slightly tempted to embrace you from the back at times and kiss the nape of your neck softly while you're busy doing the dishes while Minji is secretly smirking to herself about how things are going well and how you're a part of their family now

If you try to go back to work, Kim might be a bit disgruntled at first but he'll allow you to do so to not seem controlling. However he'll fill your head with things like how you don't need to earn when he's there to take care of you and you could take a break for a while and such. He just wants to take care of you and shower you with his love. Minji would side with her dad too. They both are possessive over you, they know they're being possessive but they're overlooking it. It's for your safety after all. If you try leaving them, Minji would be hurt and upset and Kim would be hurt and devastated too. But he'd be determined to bring you back and it wouldn't take him long for him to find you. He'll just carry you in his arms and you can throw all the tantrums you want but he's not going to budge while he's taking you back home with him where you belong. He won't yell at you or raise his voice at you, he doesn't believe in hurting the ones he loves. But he'll gently chide you like a stern parent telling off a naughty child for their bad behavior. The next day the locks of the house will be changed and there'll be bars on the windows to prevent you from leaving

He's not completely heartless to prevent you from going outside either. He knows and understands you feel trapped which is why you'll still be allowed to go out. Provided it's with him or Minji. No more going out on your own, not even to the grocery store that's ten minutes away from the house either. However when it comes to someone taking you away from him...I want to say I hope they might be safe but who am I kidding at this point. He'll literally obliterate them from his path. How dare they mess with you, they'll literally pay with their lives. Or bones. He can't bear to see you cry, it hurts his heart. Minji and Kim would be on either side of you hugging you while you cry as Kim will gently brush away your tears and lovingly caress your cheek. You're his and he'd do anything to make sure it stays that way...

[nhularin]

西村 力 EGOIST

PAIRING just soccer player!niki GENRE blue lock AU, niki as rin itoshi YUPPPPP WARNINGS anxiety and doubt, no x reader! WC 0.23k

the stadium buzzed with anticipation as niki stepped onto the soccer field, his heart heavy with determination. this was his chance to prove himself, to leave his mark on the game he loved, to step out of his brother's shadow. the pressure weighed on his shoulders like a double edged sword, pushing him to excel but also threatening to make him fail

as the game unfolded, nikis skills ignited like lightning, his every move showcasing his passion and talent. he maneuvered through defenders with ease, his feet leading the ball like a marionette. the crowd erupted in cheers, their support fueling his desire to succeed.

but among the euphoria, there were moments that pierced through his confidence like a sharp blade. mistakes crept in, tiny cracks in his performance that stained his otherwise fluid play. each misplaced pass, every missed opportunity, added to the burden he carried, amplifying the whispers of doubt in his mind

the game reached its climax, the scoreline tightly contested. nikis body screamed with exhaustion, his mind a whirlwind of emotions. his legs trembled, threatening to buckle under the immense pressure. but he refused to give up, fighting to the final whistle.

when the game ended, nikis heart sank. the scoreboard displayed a draw, leaving him with a bitter taste of dissatisfaction. abd though he had left his heart and soul on the field, he couldn't escape the haunting thought of what could have been. regret weighed heavily in his chest, overshadowing the moments of brilliance that dotted his performance.

with defeated strides, he trudged off the field, his head bowed with disappointment. but as he glanced back at the green field, the silver of hope shimmered beneath the layers of anxiety. this was just one game, he thought, one chapter in his soccer journey. he had learned from his mistakes and grown in his shortcomings. the road ahead, paved with victories and defeats, would be an opportunity to rise from the ashes, to prove that he was more than the doubts that haunted him

As niki stepped out into the night, the haunting echoes of the game slowly faded into the background. In their place, a flame of determination flickered within him, illuminating his path forward. with renewed resolve, he promised to himself to let go of the moments of the past and embrace the challenges that awaited him, ready to soar higher like a lion and claim his place among the stars of the soccer world. like a real egoist.

PERM TAGLIST @avocarua @misoxhappy

[bluelocksource]

Otoya Eita’s trivia (source: twt & Egoist Bible).

☆ Character's colour: Bright green.

☆ Weapons: Off-the-ball movement and agility.

☆ Nickname: ‘Ninja’.

☆ Birthday: 3rd December.

☆ Current age: 17 (3rd year of high school)

☆ Zodiac: Sagittarius.

☆ Birthplace: Aichi Prefecture.

☆ Family: Father. Mother. Older sister. Himself. Younger sister.

☆ Current height: 177 cm.

☆ Dominant foot: Right foot.

☆ Blood type: O.

☆ Starts playing football: At age 6.

☆ Team before joining BLUE LOCK: Kirigakure Academy Soccer Club.

☆ Motto: "Step up or step aside." **

☆ Favorite food: Churros. “It tastes great.”

☆ Disliked food: Pickles. “It doesn’t taste great."

☆ Favorite animal: Phoenix. “It is a flaming bird.”

☆ Favorite season: Summer. "Do I need a reason?"

☆ Favorite football player: Minamino Takumi.

☆ Favorite music: He likes listening to neo city pop genre.

☆ Favorite manga: Moteki. “It’s top-tier, no objection.”

☆ Favorite movie: Home Alone. “The unbeatable Christmas movie.”

☆ Favorite TV show: FNS Kayousai & Music Station Special Superlive. “I can get senselessly hyped up.”

☆ Favorite celebrity: Aso Kumiko. “I’m seriously dying!”

☆ Ideal type: Bright and honest woman. (don’t count on it, he’ll change it soon).

☆ Hobby: Tour around TDR (Tokyo Disney Resort). “Riding Tower of Terror at DisneySea is a must!”

☆ Mushroom shoots vs Bamboo shoots: “I only eat the chocolate part of the mushroom. I’ll give the rest to you.”

☆ What goes best with rice : A cute girl. “I like watching girls who eats rice deliciously.”

☆ What makes him happy: Something exciting.

☆ What makes him upset: Something boring/depressing.

☆ What he thinks his strength is: “I forget unpleasant stuff after sleeping.”

☆ What he thinks his weakness is: “I forget important stuff after sleeping.”

☆ Favorite/Best subject: English. “I only take the class seriously because the teacher is beautiful.”

☆ Dislike/weak subject: Other than English “Studying is boring.”

☆ What made him cry recently: He got hit in the eye from being slapped. “Cheating’s not good.”

☆ Usual sleeping time: 8 hours.

☆ What he usually ends up buying from convenience store: Breath care. “Who knows if I’ll be kissing my girlfriend later.”

☆ Place he washes first when taking a bath: Between the toes. “Don’t want to get athlete’s foot.”

☆ Fixation: Scent. “I can tell our compatibility when you hug me.”

☆ Number of chocolates received from previous Valentine: 1. “It’s from a senior I was dating at the time. I was really into her.”

☆ At what age he experiences first love: At age 3. “With Dokin-chan.”

☆ The first time he got confessed to: Happened when he was 5 years old. “I kissed about 95% of the girls in nursery school, and 50% of them confessed.”

☆ What will he do if received 100 million yen: "Charter a night pool party for as long as I can."

☆ At what age he stops receiving presents from Santa: At age 12.

☆ What was his last wish from Santa: New spikes. “With some exciting design.”

☆ How he spent his holiday: "Either hanging out with friends or going on a date. I love the fluttering feelings prior to dating. The feeling wears off once I date the girl, though."

☆ What will he do during his last day on Earth: Enjoy the moment.

** I translated his motto before (link to the post). It was difficult for me to translate it but a user who replied on that post worded it better than mine so I use them here :) thanks @thats-miss-spider-to-you !

note: i want to apologize in advance for any mistake made in the translation!

[post-leffert]

Greece: First issue of the anarcho-nihilist newspaper “Blessed Is The Flame”

In the following link we provide the digital version of the first issue of the newspaper of our project “Blessed Is The Flame“, a project for the diffusion of the theory and praxis of black-flag anarchy* While the newspaper is in Greek, we would like to see it translated in other languages too and be disseminated internationally. If any comrades are interested in this undertaking, contact us at blessedistheflame (at) riseup (dot) net, and we can provide you with an editable .odt version of the file.

PDF: Ευλογημένη Η Φλόγα Τεύχος

In this newspaper we will cover topics like international and local anti-info of the two most recent months, discussions, claims of responsibility, ideas and tips about direct action and anti-surveillance.

Editorial: “The present newspaper is the printed form of the project Blessed Is The Flame, which will be irregularly issued. The purpose of this project is not only to disseminate black-flag anarchy, but more generally to disseminate the radical thoery, praxis and criticism that stems from the act of insurrectionarry armed desire, recognising that the social situation we are in, and which we did not choose, leads our lives to bankruptcy, to the alienation of our Egos.

We do not attempt to persuade anyone, we do not wish to bet on the mass mobilisation of a robotised society. What we are trying to do is contribute in building a communication bridge between those who have chosen to revolt here and now and those who want to revolt. We are what we are because we got courage and inspiration from the rebels who show us what is possible. We do not postpone the insurrectionary and revolutionary action for an indeterminate future because we are liberated from the bonds of hope. We are not nihilists because we are simply pessimists. No, we are nihilists because the situations around us do not allow us to think of future utopias, because we do not wait for freedom to come, but we bring freedom each time we act with defiance and without compromise against society, state, capital, and any other aspect of civilisation. This is the most immediate realisation of anarchy.

Long live direct, anarchist and guerrila action No resignation, no truce, no peace For anarchy and nihilism”

*In the terminology used within the Greek radical circles, black anarchy (μαύρη αναρχία) refers collectively to the nihilist, individualist, insurrectionary, anti-social and egoist currents of anarchism.

Posted in LibraryTagged Anarchist Newspaper, Anarcho-Nihilist, Anti-Social, Black Anarchy, Blessed Is The Flame, Egoist, Greece, Individualist Anarchist, Insurrection, PDF, Publication, Revolution

[hansolz-moved]

hoppin on the trend :3 credit to whoever started this LOL

[smoooothoperator]

Save Your Tears

08: Trust Issues

Driver! Mick Schumacher x opera singer! OC (Ophelia Becker)

Strangers to friends to lovers, love at first sight, long plane flight, personal drama, opera references

Words: 2.8k

Warnings: drama, Stephanie (she's a warning)

Every way of feedback is very welcomed

Masterlist

previous part

She liked the perfume of the flowers. They reminded her of success, of good work. After a concert she always received a rose or a small bouquet of flowers as a little trophy for her hard work.

But three days ago she started hating the smell of them. 

They always said that on funerals they decorate the room with flowers that have a strong scent to avoid the smell of death and putrefaction.

And now, watching the church decorated with flowers, it made her feel nauseous.

"Are you okay?" Mick asked her when he saw her take a deep breath.

"I don't like the smell of those flowers" she sighed. "It's okay, don't worry"

Mick sighed and nodded, holding her hand on her lap, brushing her knuckles. He wants to stay with her a little longer before he has to go with Josh towards the aisle, standing next to him and watching in the first row how he gets married with who he thought she was the love of his life.

Only thinking about it made him feel nervous, playing with the ring Ophelia wears on her pointing finger.

"Mick" she whispered, resting her head on his shoulder. "And you? Are you okay?"

"Why are you asking that?" he whispered, looking at the front but never stopping playing with her ring.

"I know when someone is nervous" she said. "And right now you are very nervous. I bet your friend is not as nervous as you"

He knows she tried to say that to make him smile. But it only made him sigh and shake his head. 

"I don't know if I'll do something stupid" he whispered. "You know, like something that only happens on movies"

"For example?"

"I don't know. What if once I see her I can't hold it anymore?" he whispered. "What if I can't watch them getting married?"

"Love is egoist, Mick" she whispered, sounding hurt. "Even if they are your friends, you love her. And a wedding confirms that you can't have her"

He wanted to look at her, tell her that he's praying that those intrusive thoughts will never happen. That he will stay calm because he knows that right now his heart beats for her and only her.

But he can't. He can't say that because he can't trust his own words, his own promises. 

So the only thing he knew he could do was wrap his arm around her shoulders and pull her close to him, pressing his lips on her temple and breathing in her scent.

"I have to leave you here, okay?" he sighed, brushing his thumb on the skin of her shoulder.

"Don't worry" she smiled. "I'm going to be here"

He sighed and nodded, kissing one last time her temple and getting up, walking towards his friend Josh.

"Who is she?" Josh smirked.

"A friend" Mick answered smiling.

"Mhm, a friend or a girlfriend?" he laughed.

"A friend" he repeated.. 

"She looks cute. Where did you meet her? I think you never talked about her, what's her name?" Josh smirked, nudging him softly with his ankle on his ribs.

"Ophelia" he said, looking at her with a smile. 

"Nice name" he chuckled. "Are you really going to be secretive? Really? Come on!"

"This is your wedding. I don't want to steal the spotlight, Josh" he sighed. "By the way, focus. Stephanie is coming soon"

That's the first time he calls her by her name in front of his friend. No nicknames. Just Stephanie.

And he felt a little proud of it.

He looked at Ophelia and smiled when he caught her looking at him. Those flames inside his chest were getting bigger and hotter, and it only made him smile more.

She could be more than a friend. Now he knows. 

He just wants to know her more. But he already feels that he knows her. Even if it's only after talking about simple things. 

The church started to get more crowned, and that feeling of relief when he started to think about Ophelia, started to change into anxiety.

What if the feelings for his first love are stronger than the feelings he has for Ophelia?

He heard the first notes of the string quartet that was playing the entry of the bride and he tried to not look at Stephanie. He focused his eyes on Ophelia and immediately tried to suppress a laugh.

She tried to keep a serious face, but with every failure the musicians made, every out of tune note they played, she rolled her eyes or simply made a face of pain.

Mick smiled looking at her, how she hugged herself and pinched her nose. It's cute, she's cute. 

She was nervous. 

She never thought she could go this far. And now it was too late to go back in time.

When the music started to sound she took a deep breath, holding tight the flowers bouquet.

It's too late now. Too late to regret everything.

When the doors opened the first person she saw was Josh. He looks handsome, really handsome. But next to him is the person she wants.

But, wait… why is he not looking at her? Where is he looking at? Why is he smiling?

She looked around, trying to find the reason of his smile. Maybe he's looking at her sister, who he came with. Yeah, he saw a blonde woman.

But wait. That's not Gina. Who the hell is she?

The moment she walked the few stairs that got her closer to her soon to be husband, she looked again at Mick. 

He's not looking at her. She's looking at that girl she doesn't know.

Why? Why? Why!

It was always like that. He never looked at her the way she wanted. He was away all the time, never thinking about her.

Now he's there, staring at another woman, again. 

But that's her fault. If only she was honest and said the things how they were instead of being with someone she doesn't love. If only she stayed more with him.

It has always been him. She loved him since they were four years old. She always looked after him, trying to get his attention. But it was hard since he started his racing career. Whenever she wanted to be with him he said that he had training, or a race, or he had to fly to the other side of the world. 

She never was part of his priorities. She never had a space on his agenda, so that's why she tried to get his attention by dating Josh. But it never worked. So she tried harder. She invited him to events where she had to go with Josh. But he never said anything. 

He only accepted their relationship and let them be on their own.

She never wanted that? How the hell can you make Mick Schumacher jealous?

So she told him that she was getting married to Josh, maybe that would make something to him. But nothing, nada. Only a smile, a nod, a "congratulations" and a hug. 

What is wrong with him? Why can he look at her? Who is that girl she's looking at?

"Stephanie" Josh whispered, holding her hand and frowning. "Everything okay?"

She just hummed. 

But nothing is okay. She's not with the man she wants, she's not getting his attention. This wedding is not what she wanted. The last name she's going to have is not the one she wanted.

She couldn't stop the storm of feelings inside of her head. Jealousy, because those blue eyes are not on her; regret, because everything she did was to get his attention; anger, because he's not the man that is standing next to her.

"Stephanie, do you accept Josh as your future husband?"

She snapped out of her mind and looked at Josh. Then at Mick. Then at that blonde girl.

Who is she?

"Steph?" Josh frowned looking at her. "Say it"

She felt his hand holding her tighter and the nausea started to get more persistent. 

She went too far. This is not what she wanted.

"I… I…" she frowned, trying to find Mick's eyes.

And when she finally found them, she felt a stab in her back. He was frowning, asking what was going on with his eyes, why she's not saying what she's supposed to say. 

"I need to breathe" she excused herself, trying to escape from her fiance and grabbing her dress, running downstairs and out of the church.

He was distracted by Ophelia all the time. 

She looked so wonderful, and he felt so happy that he didn't even look at Stephanie. He couldn't be more happy.

It was like she was his cure. The cure for his broken heart and soul. 

When he didn't hear Stephanie answer he was confused, and looked at her, finding her staring at him. 

Why is she not looking at Josh? Why is she not answering? What is going on? What did he miss?

The moment he saw her run away he looked at Josh.

"What is going on?" he whispered, and he only heard Josh taking a deep breath trying to not panic.

"I don't know" Josh swallowed thickly. "Yesterday she was acting weird. I should go talk with her"

"Let me" he said. "I am her friend too"

Josh sighed and nodded, rubbing the palm of his hand over his face and took a deep breath while he saw Mick follow Stephanie.

He opened the door and saw her walking side to side, taking deep breaths. She looks like she's having a panic attack, rumbling things under her breath and hugging herself with her arms.

"Stephanie?" Mick frowned, making her stop. "What is going on?"

"What is going on?" she said loud, not turning to look at him. "Who is that girl?"

"What?" he frowned, confused. 

"Yeah. The girl you were looking at. Who is?" she asked again. "Why her?"

"What are you talking about?" 

"You were supposed to bring your sister!" she exclaimed. "And that bitch doesn't look like Gina"

"What the…" Mick frowned. He never saw her act this way. "Don't you dare to call her like that"

"Why her?! Why her and not me?!" she exclaimed, turning to look at him. Her eyes were red of jealousy, of anger.

Mick looked at her wide eyes. What is going on? What type of dream is this?

"What does it mean?" he mumbled. "Stephanie, this is not funny"

"God, you are so blind" she groaned. "Everything I did was because of you! Since we were four!"

This is a hidden camera right? 

"I started dating Josh because I wanted your attention! But instead of that, you just accepted it and stepped away" she groaned. "I did so many things, I fucking tried so hard to get your attention but you never looked at me!"

This is really a hidden camera. 

How on Earth can this happen? In which moment something like this could happen?

"You are joking, right?" Mick laughed bitterly, not knowing if he should be happy or mad. "I looked at you! Always!"

"A few minutes ago you weren't" she frowned.

"I fucking loved you, Stephanie!" he exclaimed.

None of them noticed curious people going towards the door of the church, listening to them.

None of them noticed the groom and the blonde girl walking closer to the pair.

"You were my first love! I loved you since the day I met you, but then you started dating Josh" he said. "Why did you start dating him? To get my attention? Well, now you have it! But not the way you want it"

"I never wanted this to happen" she said, taking a step closer to him, too close. 

"It's too late now"

Stephanie frowned, taking a step closer and holding both of his cheeks. He said she was his first love, right? 

He wanted to take a step back. His brain tried to remind him of images of Ophelia, of how it feels holding her hand, kissing her temple, kissing her… is she kissing her now?

Her lips are soft, just how she imagined. He wonders if the red lipstick she's wearing is now on his lips too. She kisses really well…

He opened his eyes a little, and when he saw the brunette hair he gasped, pulling away from Stephanie.

"What the hell?" he frowned.

He heard gasps and the next thing he felt was someone pushing him to the side. A blonde haired person. Ophelia.

"Ophelia! Wait!" he called her.

She saw it. She saw them kissing, as well as more than half of the guests. Josh was standing a few meters in front of her, watching how Stephanie kissed him and how he kissed her back.

He has what he wanted, right? He has the woman he loved. She was there only to fill the emptiness he had on his heart thinking Stephanie didn't love him. Well she does. 

She heard him calling her, but she decided to ignore him. She has a pride to defend, he doesn't deserve her tears.

"Ophelia" he sighed, holding her wrist and stopping her, only receiving a slap once she turned around.

"Are you happy?" she asked. "You have what you wanted. Are you happy? The girl of your dreams and you didn't even need to confess. Congratulations"

"Ophelia please, let me explain" Mick asked, holding her hand.

"Explain what, Mick?" she frowned, getting free from his hold. "You love Stephanie and she will always be the woman you love. And by the way, you have a terrible taste in women. She's an attention seeker and it's so obvious that she only wanted you for your fame and money. You are an awful person, Mick! You really made me believe you felt something for me. And silly me, I fell in that stupid trap and started thinking that we could be together"

"Y-you what?"

"Don't call me ever again. Whatever I have in your house just throw it away" she said, wiping away her tears angrily. "I'm so disappointed with you"

He saw how she walked away from him. He saw how she cried, this time because of him.

He heard how her heart broke even more when she talked.

He promised to heal her but this time he was the one that broke her.

She couldn’t believe she fell for him. 

All those touches, those kisses. She really thought he felt  something for her, that those small touches meant something for him, that he was telling her how he feels.

When he went towards his friend, up there on the aisle, she couldn’t stop looking at him with a smile, thinking about all the butterflies he makes her feel in her stomach, about how good he looks while he smiles, about how good that blue tie looks on him and making his eyes shine even more.

She knows he loved Stephanie, those words were engraved in her mind. But she had that little hope thinking that she could make him forget about her, that both of them could have a chance in love.

Ophelia never believed in love at first sight, she thought it was something that only happens in fairy tales. But the moment she looked at him she really thought Cupid was a few meters away shooting his arrow and stabbing it on her chest, making her fall for him, for Mick. And she thought he felt the same, that he had the same Cupid’s arrow in his chest and maybe because of that he couldn’t stop being next to her, that he needed her next to him as she needed him next to her.

The moment Stephanie walked inside the church, she felt glad that Mick was looking at her with a smile, not even fixing his eyes on the woman in white.

But then she saw her run away, and Mick going after her. Ophelia tried to convince herself that he only went to check on her, to make sure she was alright. That he went there as a friend.

Time passed, maybe minutes that felt like hours, when she saw the people from the last row of benches getting up, looking out of the church and whispering between them. 

If it wasn’t because of her curiosity, she could have ended the day happily ignorant, not knowing what happened outside the church while the guy she likes was talking with his first love. But she had to get up and walk towards the door when she heard gasps, she had to see what was happening.

Them kissing each other wasn’t something she expected. Or maybe it was. Maybe she was too scared to admit that she knew something like this could happen. She knew Mick loved Stephanie and not her.

So she walked away, bumping accidentally into him in her try of escaping the situation. She heard how he called her, how his voice was getting closer and closer. She felt his hand on her wrist and the touch was burning her skin.

Ophelia trusted him with her heart, she let him hold her in her worst moment and he only played with her heart. He had her heart in his hands and he only squeezed it.

taglist

@racinggirl @elisysd @lorarri @musingsbyshreya @vellicora @rileynicol3 @generalnav @kakorrhaphiphobia

[bibururokku]

Narcissus Game

Angst? — In which the resident heartbreaking womanizers of Blue Lock get played at their own game by some random girl. [Author's Note]: This came about because I was thinking about making an OC that matched Aiku and Otoya's energy, so that's why this is centered around those two, but you could honestly switch out the one time I mentioned their names for someone else. Anyway, I got carried away with my thinking and planning, which brings us here to this imagine. Enjoy(?)!

She was someone who fit their standards and matched the description of their ideal types, though Otoya's preferences change a lot, so maybe she doesn't actually, but he did say his type was someone bright and honest, and she was exactly that. A refreshingly bright and honest girl who was very charming and charismatic, too. Y'know, the one who can say the most shocking and outrageous things and get away with it because that's just how she is. Aiku's type is someone who looks like they aren't a hassle to break up with, and she's exactly that. Cute with an easygoing vibe, she was popular and constantly surrounded by people. The type who'd draw others in like a moth to a flame, and that's how she gets them.

Like all their flings, it was nothing serious. Just a few dates, maybe a bit of intimacy here and there, but it was all for fun.

Perhaps a bit too fun, like a game. One that they would all want to play over and over and over again.

That's why there were others in their so-called relationship, but she never bat an eye over them. Makeup? Clothes? Perfume? Hairties? Another woman in her entirety? Absolutely nothing. Seeing her ignore the constant affairs was kind of sweet, if not downright pathetic.

Nonetheless, to these egoists, it was like a dream come true.

Surely, she just loved them so much that she turned a blind eye to everything. No, she has to. Just like that, whether they were aware of it or not, their affairs started to dwindle, and they never took it too far because they were sure of it.

She had to be the one.

It isn't until they see her with the other that their dreams become a nightmare. But it made sense. Neither one of them paid much attention to her, and why would she hound them if she also had a plethora of lovers herself? These poor boys, so full of themselves that they couldn't even fathom being sidepieces as well, and the fact that she perfectly matched their ideal type just added salt to the wound.

Maybe it was because they loved her that she was so bright to them at the moment that it burned as she gave them the most honest and brutal breakup they'd ever experienced with no hassle. Or perhaps it was because they were sore losers who knew that with the two of them, love was a game, and she just won. All because they fell for the behavior she reflected back at them, like the narcissists they were.

[jasper-rolls]

Song: eternity sky Artist: きりん (Giraffe) Album: Egoistic Flame the Instrumental Circle: EastNewSound

[webwanderer]

WIP Ivantill fic?!

I tried to cook something Ivantill related, headcanon story post Round 6. Based on my and other fans theories. I just wrote this part but I plan to expand it way more. I just wanted to have a feedback before going on with the fic🙏

(I know this is lacking context so far, pls spare me)

TW: indirect SA mention, slight gore description.

Till's POV

As sudden as a bolt from the blue, I felt a shiver run down my spine. Something cold as ice breezed over my nape and a sharp tingle roared along my nerves, paralysing me there where I was sitting. Still as a statue, I held my breath. Or better, my lungs refused to inflate, my ribs acting as a cage for my squirming meat. I could feel my flesh melt to putty. The muscles of my  thigh were melting off of my femur, and all I could do was sit there and witness my body liquefy. Terror set in as I felt a large palm envelope my forearm. A visceral scream filled my mind. That hand was burning a deep mark on my skin. I was suddenly drowning in a white blaze that was hungrily devouring me whole. The flames were dancing around me and I could not breathe, the air lit on fire the last parts of my body that weren't already inflamed. 

There was no way out of that hell.

Until, I felt a hand wrap around my chin and a velvet thumb gently rubbing my cheek. I opened my eyes and looked up. There I saw some dark iris gazing down at me. For a moment, the scorching fire vanished, the noise made by the cries in my head calmed down, and I could finally breathe again. 

There, I realized how soft his hands could feel. 

Ivan sat next to me.

«Are you ok?» He asked me.

I looked at my arm: there was nothing but fair skin. Despite not seeing any trace, I could still feel the weight of forceful fingers engulfing my frame. At that moment I stood there lifeless, frail, thin as an ink stained piece of paper abandoned by a taunted poet who lost his inspiration. I didn't know what to do with myself.

I hesitated.

«Cheer up, Till.»

Ivan's POV

It had been a few hours and Till disappeared from the cafeteria of the Base without mutterings a word. I was sitting at one of the many metallic tables, staring mindlessly at my empty mug. I was brought back to reality when a warm hand touched my shoulder and I felt a presence sitting next to me. At the corner of my eye I was able to catch a glimpse of shiny pink locks and a pair of glossy emerald eyes. I tuned to face Mizi.

«I think he's in his room. He must still be metabolizing everything that happened. It will be hard, but I'm sure he'll manage to go back to his hot-headed self.» she said with half a smile.

Even though her eyes wanted to scream the opposite.

I nodded slightly and laid my attention back on the lonely cup.

It didn't matter that Mizi and I were on good terms, the silence created between us two started to fit uncomfortably tight on me.

«Er-um… Ivan, I was thinking that maybe» I listened attentively, despite still looking at the mug, «you could go and check on him?» she rushed the last part of the sentence. 

I understood her, though. This situation must have been really awkward. Still I wonder how could I look so calm. The reality was that, earlier, as I was staring at that stupid cup, my emotions were stirring messily inside of me. Blood and words and thoughts all mixed together to create an anxious mingle that was corroding me from within. Was it because I was worried about Till? Why did he run away to his room like that? Or maybe it's what happened in our round? Why did I do it? How could I do it?

I was meant to die. I was meant to die and save Till. Touch him, fake an aggression, be disqualified, lose. But I've never been strong enough. When it came to him, I could never control myself. And so I kissed him. I fucking kissed him. And I hated it. I hated myself. I forced him to kiss me. I forced the ungovernable spirit I adored to follow an order. How fucking egoist,  hypocritical. Perhaps I'm actually no different from Them. I'm just a sack of scum. I had promised myself to never show this side of me. My love should have stayed a secret. Among the exhausting demands of our owners, the relentless routines and the abuse, my love is now one of the many burdens that Till has to carry. I'm one of the deadweight that saddles him. I went too far.

I was about to explode, when Mizi arrived and woke me up from my brooding.

«I can go and check on him» I answered back. 

I didn't let my emotions transpire. I  wanted to spare Mizi, at least. She already lost Sua, she didn't need my emotional baggage as well.

I got up and left the Cafeteria. I was directed towards the dorms, towards his room, when suddenly I heard a distant humming. I walked fast and reached the end of the corridor, on my right the way to our dormitory, on the left the provenance of that faint melody. I followed my hearing. A few steps and I saw a small bench in front of me. A shady figure sitting on it, not facing me. I slowly approached the shadow, entranced by its voice like an eager seaman bewitched by a siren. Once the sound became intelligible, I immediately recognized the boy in front of me. Till was sitting alone, looking out one of the windows of the Base and humming some song.

Apparently he was too immersed in his song and didn't hear me.

Without thinking, I stretched out my hand to touch the back of his neck.

He jumped under my touch, freezing on his seat. With my palm I reached under his chin and held his face. With that action I hoped to show him that I was no harm. My figure was towering over him from behind, when he turned his face upwards to meet mine.

There, I realized how soft his gaze could feel. 

Pale as a ghost but cheeks lit red, eyes puffy and melancholy frowned brows. He was staring at me as he just witnessed death. 

I sat down next to him. I asked him if he was okay. He didn’t look okay. I briefly recalled something.

「«Do you have anything to say to your next opponent?»」

«Cheer up, Till.»

A.N. Tbh I'm very proud of this and could go on a 1h rant explaining my writing choices but I'll refrain from doing that (for now). Anyway, I wanna hear your opinions to see if some of yall would be interested in a full fic🙏

Also tell me if the way events are told is digestible enough. Like, I tried not to write a boring linear story but give it a little spice, but idk maybe I went a bit overboard with it lol.

[vijayasena]

Chapter II.....

Faith is the bird that feels the light when the dawn in still dark..

- Rabindranath Tagore

No one's p.o.v..

The sun blazed through the white translucent curtains of the wooden oak window which situated in the north wall of the messy fairly large room as if trying not to make anyone know about its uninvited arrival. the yellow painted room lit up in advance making it shone like gold.

extended banks of cloud like long french loaves glowed pink as the sun the sun spread its last rays of the day and ready to set in the arms of yamuna. the distant roof tops shined like rose tinted blush. breeze was silently singing the melody of monsoon and the distant crops danced flawlessly alluring the first rain of the year and ready to bring the relieved grin on the face of the hardworking farmers who silently prayed to god for mercy.

" it doesnt even matter they are confiscating the land if you are unable to pay the tax and the rain not being plentiful this year isn't helping the situation much"

The female with Lotus brown eyes narrowed her eyes ever so slightly as if a brown ship changing its direction according to the direction of wind her cupid lips formed into a thin exasperated stressed thin line as the long and cold fingers of hers ran through the pages of her journal.

But the brown pupil burned like rings of fire engulfed in destructive flames that just wanted to burn the white nasty hands off from the pure land of her motherland from torture and miserability those nasty hands.

Closing those eyes with thick long lashes hiding the burning rings of fire like clouds compelling to hide the sun. Her brown skin shone like gold under the blazing heat.

" Two farmers attempted suicide Niyati, the revenue officers are nothing less than an bunch of pricks marching with sepoys beating them to death if they are unable to pay the tax"

She looked at the small ideal of shri ram resting on the nearby table silently asking him to take her to don't let her rott in misery but as if the god was telling her to compel their decision that she couldn't die when she had a job to free her beloved mother land.

Tears pricked at the end of those Lotus eyes like gandharaj shedding sweet nectar but her face remained hard as rock.

These people were hardly human they didn't had any kindness not even a sense of humanity for the real citizens living on their motherland. Exploiting their people. How can they be so cruel? But whom was she kidding. They were here to ruin their country and there was no way she was going to sit back and observe her country being vanished away ruined by the nasty white hands.

She wondered how much more blood of innocents will grace the sacred pure land of her Bharat. This soil was dirty by being exploitation of its sons and daughters in most unjust ways. It was like how much pain and suffering those whites could give to them.

" your husband-" the voice of the another female came out as a hesitant effort to blurt out the truth or not her long slender fingers fidgeted with the pen in her hands as she thought if it was a good time to tell her best friend about this or not her eyes Snapped at her friend who bit her lips in anticipation fighting with the urges inside thinking if she should tell the brown eyed woman about this or not.

" snap out of it Meera" the Lotus eyed woman's voice was laced with annoyance and frustation as her chest heaved up and down in a rhythmic way calming down the amount of anger she had for those people who came to have trade and formed the territory!! as if after a tremendous storm the ship sinks down in the vast depth of the undefeated sea she stared at the woman in front of her. She was being ridiculous right now. She needed to tell what was the matter ?

And when it got something to do with the so called egoistic sadistic husband of hers no wonder she didn't got one of the nicest feelings. After all it was him, a person who gave more importance to those who came from foreign land.

Who ruined everything about Indians and India.

Who tortured people.

Who used them like a piece of rag who exploited them. Who beated them to death after making them suffer. Who left thm rot in misery .

Who disclosed the indian education policy being very proud of western culture.

Who manipulated that they were the only ones destined for greatness.

The ancient sculptures were being burned in the Asiatic society so as if to completely vanish the proofs of the greatness those pages carried the witnesses that this sacred land was touching the heavens until someone came in expensive leather boots in hope to conquer it crush it's maginificense with hunger in the eyes.

Who made the next generation completely disclosed from their own country's excellence which was beyond a tiny white brain's understanding.

Whose history held the maginificense that no one else could match.

Her jaw clenched in a slight manner doing everything in her power to reduce her anger and fury the blazing heat striked like waves of the lava on her oval shaped face bringing out unappreciated beauty. Remembering that education policy they have just brought. Established universities in many parts of Bengal, Bombay, odisha, madras, and finally Delhi.

Teaching about western tactics which the people of this land didn't even needed.

It was a way of manipulating the younger minds two completely vanished the Indian education system under the curtain of Western class and policies like the education India possessed was nothing. Anything related to their country was a waste and garbage. That the European culture was everything and it was the only thing that was right.

Like the English literature the language and the content they brought was everything one needed to look intelligent and just by following the Western tradition was the only thing one needed to become smart and face the world.

as if India was not the land to give them with the real knowledge of science with their secret manuscripts. Her Bharat was the land which discovered the reality of this universe by its unimaginable knowledge.

Compelling the young minds to forget their own roots and cultures. And become the puppets of them working in the civil services for those nasty i white hands helping them making the administration more strong so that the great Britain can spread its Glory all around the world. who didnt even knew hat was the psychology behind the indian education system and how it was so vast and complex because only the people worth its value could understand those syllabus and scripts.

making large buildings in city hubbub amid the noises of where the world was in a rush and chaos were unfolding it wasnt a way to gain knowledge in between the solace of forest between the sweet melody those tall trees of deodars produced.

Where the forest hummed sweetly as the dense mesmerizing greenery surrounded the souls like a blanket preventing them to go in the outer noisy busy world trapping them beneath the fragile leaves dancing along the song with the summer wind and despite the heat the sudden change of the weather making the white angry ball of fire disappear behind the dark dense clouds with the cool Breeze making them get to know the depth of clear knowledge palms tingle happily and smile in contentment.

This was what the siksha of gurukul was about.

And that needed to be returned back. The people needed to realise what their ancestors had predicted for their sacred land . What this land was capable of doing and how they have lost their glory over the time as a planned way by the Britishers so as to manipulate them. They had forgotten the true glory of their

" Ram was there" she stopped writing in her journal the orange sheath veil laid across the soft mattress just behind her as her breath hitched in her throat hearing this from her fellow partner.

Thinking of all the worst possibilities and outcomes her mind could come up with. Her brown irises asked for the matter the another female was hesitant in blurting out.

Well familiar with the fact that once she got to know what have happened. She might lose her composure and end up doing something that can cause them alot of trouble and all of the planning all the hard work could be go in vein in a snap of the finger. And the hard work will be wasted in seconds they needed to stand cool sometimes reaction could make everything much worse.

They were rebels. And one careless moment and they would be finished.

" Meera what is it ?" Her voice held seriousness and authority this time a strictness which wasn't visible much because of the role of dual personality she was playing betraying her true self transforming into something else who was completely unknown to her true self. Something she hated behaving like . But these small sacrifices needed to be put in order to provide the freedom they were struggling for.

"He was the one whipping the farmers when the revenue officer complained that he was being soft to HIS people he whipped them until they tested death" Meera's voice came trembling the gentle yet throaty voice was completely transformed into a voice of a freaked out cat after not knowing what the female was going to do after hearing this.

Flinching slightly she managed to peer her dark orbs at the silent solitude of the young woman whose hands held the chair in an unmistakable grip as if imagining the throat of her so called husband.

Her bitter chuckle made another woman gulp in fear as releasing a shuddering breath escaped from her chapped dry lips.

"My dagger ? Did you got it sharped?" The female looked like an Apsara mistakenly fallen on earth As sun did it's best to add more beauty in her gold like skin. The lotus eyes looked balls of fire engulfed by flames.

A Shiver ran down from Meera's spine as he with a shaky hand put the delicate realism drewed dagger on the soft mattress.

Wondering if she was planning to become widow ?

*

*

*

*

*

________________________________________________________________________________________

The winds were so fast and undefeated, opposing the intensity of the Rain and its speed, the downpouring not stopping even for a minute. There was no sign of moon in the dark mysterious invisible sky, just black clouds hiding everything acting like a big blanket. Like protecting the enchanting beauty of the big and hypnotic apperance of moon from the evil eyes.

The street was abandoned, not a mere sight of life, just the lights of street lamps were providing the much needed light and help the needy to find its way to the desired destination without having any more trouble.

shops were closed, water flowed on the slaty gray flat bricks, on the road, washing the dirt and rubbish on its way streaming into the drainage pipes through the narrow passage which were situated at both the ends of the road the mud and dirt mixing with the clean and cold water droplets making it look all clean and fresh.

The young man's footsteps echoed along the voice of the rain and the poem of the earth as his mind pondered over the just events that took place few minutes ago while silently walking in the rain ignoring the stinging pain of rain drops slapping against his tanned skin as if the nature was warning him to follow the right steps and vanish this facade he was holding. Performing since everyday with his rough calloused hands tha now was covered in such thik clot of blood unable to get it cleaned as the crimson now flew in his conscience.

He didn't knew what was happening with him. Somedays he felt everything at once and some days nothing at all. He didn't had any idea what was worse drowning beneath the waves or dying from the thirst. ?

The guilt was too much to handle .

The emotions were too much to understand.

The feelings were too much to even count.

On the other hand he was again in those painful memories that haunted him each day every day provoked him to go further every day. Whenever he stopped, feeling it was all too much to take those words that promise that he made helped him to keep going no matter what happens.

The pain and heart wrenching guilt sometimes got too much that it was confusing what to feel about and what should be laid beyond the misery of his. But who cared anymore ?

He needed to find that gond man and handle him to the British authorities and it will be end soon?

He sighed tapping his foot beneath the wet pebble only the time would tell. His mind ran back to the incident that just took place.

As if the today's torture of gracing his conscience in red crimson with the blood of an innocent harmless farmers wasn't enough.

He disgusted himself. He hated himself and then did more things which made him hate more of himself who even thought he deserved to live ?

And another innocent will be punished just because they dared to raise their voice against unjust.

Flashback..

The morning breeze of the capital layed still in the afternoon sunlight grazing in the over crowded streets of Delhi. The housing chambers having protests all overs due to the absence of governor. In the large hall which led through the huge corridor lightened by the blazing heat as much as it could muster up as it made its way through the black clouds that shielded the sun.

Even being the hall was large and twice as three basket ball courtyard he still felt suffocating as all the air have been knocked out of his puncturing lungs. Breathing was turning hard. Standing there in between these people in their service. Risking their lives.

He felt disgusting and filthy but that needed to be done. After all what more bad could happen with him? The voices echoed in his eardrums piercing through the veins hurted his soul. He felt blow after blow but dare let anything show on his extremely beautiful face. While standing there in between hundreds of whites.

The professional yet throaty voice of Edward Lambert the security officer echoed in the giant hall. As the sepoys the ones who were just there to enjoy show the ones who were being discriminated yet followed orders and the ones who had to serve another nation putting Stone on their heart while watch and be living witnessing their country's down fall.

The chair persons the churchils and governors of Bengal Madras and Bombay being the sub ordinate to the governor of Delhi listened with somewhat annoyance yet showed they cared after all everyone was hungry for power eyeing the throne of Delhi like prey?

But had to maintain that facade to show how much they cared about each other.

"And that's the gist of it we have a hunter targetting the governor roaming free in Delhi we shouldn't be really bothering about imbecile tribes however our good friend the Nizam, thinks they might trouble us and since this conercerns the governor we should act on it and with a good deal of bother "

Edward paused pacing around the wooden platform with somewhat concern evident the lack of melanin in their body didn't even gave them a good eye colour. As he looked at Peterson maculey the governor of Bengal briefly. " Alright Sir we will apprehened this bugger" Martin George the public prosecutor said in a very passionate tone as if trying to show his enthusiasm and loyalty to British Empire.

Edward tilted his head as Martin stood up from his chair his head high in a hope of getting most confidential information his voice again asked " Though I would rather roast this swine on a bed of coals"

The hall which was silent by now erupted into praises as claps echoed in a void of distance irritating Ram's ear more than it ever could his blood boiled like lava as his grip tightening around his wrist. He chanted under his breath to calm himself down. As all praised Martin for his words. Some gave him disgusting and filthy looks looks being a brown Indian soldiers had their own disparity and discrimination.

But who could understand him ?

Edward sat back in his chair with the satisfaction. Adjusting the buttons of his coat as Martin raised his hand "let us have the file sir" he demanded.

Edward leaned forward trailing off all a sudden struggling with the correct choice of words.

" well, yes that's the catch officer we have nothing on him" his lips in a thin line bore a hole in the table and then stared at Martin who gave him a look of disbelief. Twitching his right eye he shifted in his feet .

" You mean nothing?" He asked one more time to confirm if he heard right. Edward scowled looking down as Martin paused and again threw.

" identifying features? Criminal history?" He asked still unsure.

In response the British man leaned onto the table without using any words showing the extreme level of lack of information about the "hunter" they had planned to catch.

Martin who looked way too confident till now turned around and sighed taking his seat back not knowing what to say.

The senior police officer who sat on the other chair of member of chairman turned to look at Edward " it's quite an impossible task"

" how the hell are we supposed to catch him ?" Another person the organiser of the committee immediately added in a helpless and questioning tone.

The room which was echoing in a complete absolute silence under the humid breeze which made Ram's skin itchy and the room was waving in the silence suddenly went feral that could make a normal person hear the sound of the pin falling . Was now replaced by hushed murmurs everyone was beyond shocked and confused that how they didn't had any information regarding this matter.

The police men started talking among themselves asking what kind of thing was happening hushed whispers echoed "Do they expect us to capture a tribal with no criminal history ?" Officer's said to each other.

Until the woman with strawberry blonde hair the wife of governor general scott Catherine who sat on top of the red velvet throne like chair stared at the people. Her wrinkled face showing off her falling age but the evil that masked behind that face was unknown to the best. Her witchy eyes spoke of attitude the way she despised the skin colour brown was beyond any understanding. To shut the mouths she spoke in a loud authoritative voice for every person to hear.

" the one that accomplishes the impossible will be promoted to the. Rank of special officer "

Her voice stated Edward looked at her questioning his ability of hearing Martin, George was completely astonished to hear the set of words coming from Lady Scott. Silence

Complete silence engulfed the whole room. As no one knew what to say.

" do you want him dead or alive ?" A husky voice with thick Indian accent said in a loud manner making a Shiver ran down from their spine. As it held a kind of power in itself. The series of officers who were standing in front of the owner of the voice and Ram came out visible in the gaze of lady Scott.

The ruthless lady eyed him up and down as soon as he came into view.

Based on the perspective either she was checking him out like he was a piece of meal or either like a dirt to crush under her feet just because he was brown and an Indian. The Police head looked at Ram in amusement his eyes wide . Taking a deep breath he made his way to lady Scott and leaned against her shoulder so as to speak slowly.

" I can vouch for this man if anyone can do the job it's him." With that he again made his way to his chair  Lady Scott nod barely recognisable her gaze still fixed to an emotionless ram who stood there like a statue waiting for the final orders. Her lips lifted up in a mocking smirk.

"You bring him dead, you recieve a bounty - you bring him alive you will be promoted to special officer" she said in a slow tone words flowed effortlessly from the filthy mouth of hers as Ram's eyes suddenly blazed with a uncombustable flame looking ahead of the world map printed on the front giant Wall. And England's flag printed on the colonised countries and continents he did the salutation. Exploiting those ones as well.

Bitching around the world according to normal mindsets.

For them it was like spreading their glory ? According to their self obsessed mindset.

But for those who were suffering. It was a beginning of a new era.

*.        *.         *.          *.          *.            *.          *.        *.        *.           *.         

Flashback ends..

When Niyati's feet stepped inside her 'home sweet home' it was already twilight the orange glory spread its beauty in the yamuna as water provided more beauty to the capital. Her steps were so soft that even cottons would be defeated. The drastic change in her personality was wonderous. Just a moment ago the lotus eyes woman was planning to show other's hell and now she walked as if even the ground floor will be in pain. With her head low she closed the door and turned around just to face her very dear husband.

Only the almighty God and she, herself knew how much it took her to lower her gaze and control herself from choking that man standing before her to death, with her head still standing low keeping up with the act of sweet innocent wife she was considered as. She step forward to walk away from his sight. As he never fancied acknowledging her.

The urge to slam him against a wall and kill him right away stabbing him with her now sharped dagger was eating her from inside . Her heart took the pace as Her sweet smell of gandhar Raj and morga was still in the monsoon breeze. The soft and subtle itra danced around the walls of the house. Just when calming down she was about to walk past him too disgusted to even see his face, she halted her pink pastel cotton saree was tugged behind her.

Her lotus eyes widened as if a new flower just bloomed out when she realised her so called husband dared to pull such stunt. Rage was a very small word to describe what she was feeling at that moment. Her heartbeat quickened as she fisted her soft hands against the cotton fabric of her saree kept reminding herself this wasn't the time to kill him. Never in a million years she expected this from someone like him.

He was digging his own grave by doing this. Relaxing her stiff back the black raven hair blew on her face making her huff " the fucking bastard" she thought as she gritted her teeth in fury. Clenching her jaw she closed her eyes shut taking a second before changing her face back to polite, blank face every housewife was expected to wear.

"My pallu -" she trailed off her voice slow hesitant wasn't her she didn't talked like that but she had to as she cringed internally at her own voice that she wanted to dig herself a hole sox feet under.

However much to her surprise, Ram walked past her his steps rushed and wanting to get away her perfectly threaded eyebrows met each other as she frowned but covered it within a blink of an eye. " it's stuck in the drawer" with that he walked away giving her the usual cold shoulder. Niyati's jaw dropped in shock instantly. She looked back and indeed her husband was right and honest. Gritting her teeth, she roughly tugged her pallu in annoyance and fury so hard that a half part were torn too. However she didn't care about that.

All she cared about was to trap this bastard so that she could save her precious motherland her features softener  as she thought about those farmers the memory lane went back to those precious people who shed their sweat so that they can have their meal and no one sleeps hungry? However she quickly hid it.

The poor family of them what would they going to do now as the only person who was the soul earner of the family went away.

What would their future going to hold how will they survive in this cruel world? Her eyes welled up as she shook her head she couldn't break right now. She still has to seduce this bastard without seducing him. Letting her messy bun open she quickly gathered those black lucious locks which touched her hips like mohini. She put it in a braid. Washing her hands and tugging the now wrenched pallu against her flat belly.

Rolling her eyes she entered inside the fairly large kitchen. Small mercies of life the kitchen was shining perfectly cleaned. Small mercies of life as none of them had either breakfast or lunch not that she cared about him.

Slowly making mental plans she started to sort her plans for tonight. She was going to make this man regret himself with every fibre of his being for the stunt he pulled and how many innocent lives he took by hook or by crook.

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[yua-nism]

Blast it! by RE-O-DO, JOSHUA, JUDAH, 2(YOU), MOMOCHI, A' (en tl)

disclaimer: this is my first time translating a song, so please bear with me if there's any mistakes. by the way, this is the full version.

Blast it! Blast it!

Are you ready? Let’s go

Don’t forget that Innocence

The fragrance of Hyacinth(s), those precious memories

Even if beaten down by weakness, I’ve never thought of giving up on this EXiT

Egoistic, isn’t that nice too

It’s the light that we lit up

Blast it! Blast it!

Definitely not wrong at all

Blast it! Blast it!

Taking the INiTiaTiVe

Blast it! Blast it!

Even if the road ahead can’t be seen

We’re going ahead without hesitation

Believe in yourself and move forward

The night sky is gently shining

The moon is reflecting your beauty, enwrapping it

Being unable to do anything on my own

I realized that I would have been unable to get through this without you by my side

Even if we’re far apart, to you who’ll be gazing at the same night sky

Blast it! Blast it!

This treasured feeling

Blast it! Blast it!

I pray that it can be conveyed

Blast it! Blast it!

Not only tonight

I’ll always be thinking of you

I wanna say thank you for my Dear…

Do you feel the Agitation?

Stop chitchatting and follow up

Something like Retreat(ing) doesn’t suit me at all

Trouble is fine, so bring it on!

Stop saying those annoying words

Use your voice to feel it For real

Blast it! Blast it!

Hitting it cleanly with a straight

Blast it! Blast it!

Roar and shout it out

Blast it! Blast it!

This moment will decide the winner

Now feel my determination

Pointing straight to the New World ahead

Loving each other wholeheartedly

That should be it right?

The Relation between us

What I truly want to do

Has to be decided by myself

No matter when, it’s not too late

Compared to the uncomplete me from yesterday

The me of today is the one You know

Blast it! Blast it!

A red car is driving forward

Blast it! Blast it!

More and more passionate, day after day

Blast it! Blast it!

Aim towards the goal under the orange sunset

That seemingly burning STARLIGHT

Is right in front of these hands stretching out

Those words that are shaking one’s heart

A touchable spirit, asking me for forgiveness

Show me, even just for a moment

If all my heart’s desires can be fulfilled

Understanding this twisted love

Means you have already accepted this life

Blast it! Blast it!

Ephemeral bubbles

Blast it! Blast it!

This illusory world

Blast it! Blast it!

Right ahead of these roaring flames

Searching for a single truth

The trick bird has long since soared away

Blast it! Blast it!

Blast it! Blast it!

Gazing into the mirror in the evening

It should be fine even if I don’t feel any guilt, right?

Witness this four-leafed clover’s magic

There’s nowhere to run even if you’re scared now

Pretending not to hear the S≠O≒S

Dodging the Calling Cat skillfully

Blast it! Blast it!

It’s a kamu kamu miracle

Blast it! Blast it!

An invitation for the future

Blast it! Blast it!

Now let’s become HAPPY

This feeling will definitely get through

No way (it won’t), this is certain right?

Praise our song

Please witness this stage we unfolded

Thank you for accompanying us through this survival

Praise our song

Face the present and future with courage

Thank you for enjoying this stage alongside us

(This story) will always continue

Rock our future Blast!

Let’s go

March forward

Swearing upon the moon

Putting thoughts into song

With my true self

Continuing this dream

And painting the future

Notes

The bold words are the ones that reference other songs. The more confusing one would be Atan's. To explain, no way = massaka, which references Massaka no Massacre. The roaring flames in Momochi's part refer to Guren shinju. Lastly, the "gently" in Joshua's part refers to yasashi no oiru.

Also, the "straight" in Judah's part might be referring to one of his drama tracks' names in Evolve, but I wasn't sure so I left it out.