#Eurovision ranking

[columba1234]

My 16 7 winners from this year Eurovision 2023 (in no particular order)

1, Czechia: Vesna - My Sister's Crown

(this is my earliest personal winner when the songs were selected lol)

2, Finland: Käärijä - Cha Cha Cha

(I once rank it last after the first listen, but after a second time, I regretted it. Käärijä, you are my winner)

3, Latvia: Sudden Lights - Aijā

(If this one doesn't qualify, I'll riot. Anyone who can vote in the 1st semi, please vote number 4 please. Thank you)

4, Spain: Blanca Paloma - Eaea

(Spain is really stepping up for Eurovision this year. From SloMo to Eaea (both of them are really good, I just don't really like SloMo last year), so having Eaea this year is perfect)

5, Slovenia: Joker Out - Carpe Diem

(Ljubjiana 2024? A high chance indeed)

6, Serbia: Luke Black - Samo mi se spava

(Like Spain, Serbia is stepping up their Eurovision quality from last year's success of In Copore Sano. Belgarde 2024 is a high chance too.)

7, Austria: Teya and Salena - Who the hell is Edgar?

(POE. POE. POE. (Why the hell can I almost forget Austria? It's one of your winners, @columba1234))

Honorable mentions:

Moldova: Pasha Perfeni - Soarele și luna

Norway: Alessandra - Queen of Kings

Germany: Lord of the Lost - Blood and Glitter

Malta: The Busker - Dance (Our Own Party)

France: La Zarra - Évidemment

Portugal: Mimicat - Ai coração

Croatia: Let 3 - Mama ŠČ

Ukraine: TVORCHI - Heart of Steel

Australia: Voyager - Promise

(actually, this is my top 16 post lol (and they are soooo good, 2023 is truly a strong year) and Eurovision 2023 is in less than 2 weeks now and I still can't watch semi 1 live due to exams....)

[yep-ishouldbesleeping]

Spain and Sweden ending up over Serbia in the ranking is a sin

[aprilskyforever]

Henny ranks Eurovision 2023 - before the show

i’m kinda late with this this year, i admit. reasons? I guess I can say i’ve been busy, but it’s not all, truth is i’m not that engaged about this year actually... of course there are songs i love, but it’s not a year where i struggle to make a top 10 you know? anyway. enough negativity. let’s take a look, shall we? oh and please not that the songs are not in a certain order within each category.

category: can’t we have two winners please?

Sweden - yeah i’m in my patriotic era again. this is euphoria chapter two, in a good way, and it’d be so cool if she won purely from a statistic point of view... howEVER........ 

Finland - wouldn’t it just be great with a winner that was... a little rough around the edges? dirty, gritty, would scare your grandma only to later make her nod and say it’s quite a bop afterall? and it’d be the proper reward for finland who has brought their absolut a-game to their national final for the past few years - even though they’ve in my opinion picked the wrong winner from it. until this year that is. yeah, i think i’d like that.

category: added to my playlist and played frequently

Norway - mgp really stepped up their game as well this year and sometimes i even question if queen of kings is my winner from it (there’s tresko, ekko inni meg, love you in a dream etc etc) but my god it just goes so hard doesn’t it? although WHEN are they putting the version with the intro on spotify?? WHEN!!

Slovenia - you know sometimes i forget carpe diem is a eurovision entry because it just sounds like something i’d hear from an average band in my library?? idk how else to describe it. i just love it. and i love THEM. bojan’s charisma is.... sigh

Austria - it bops and it’s so CLEVER i love it

Serbia - hello??? i’m obsessed

Portugal - as soon as the beat kicked in on my first listen i was hooked. it’s flawless. and it’s the first portugese entry i’ve been really engaged in since.... uh... i started watching?? obviously i’ve liked entries from them but i haven’t really cared. this time i do.

Czechia - go ladies go!! i really hope this will be as epic on stage as in the mv. please please please

Malta - this is a sort of recent obsession, i didn’t really get it right after the nf, so we’ll see how long this lasts but i’m always having fun listening to it

category: also in my playlist but not as frequent

Estonia - it’s beautiful! but maybe not so original. my winner of eesti laul was meelik /:

Switzerland - i actually don’t mind the lyrics and i love the chord intervals in the chorus

Croatia - chaotic fun. and sticks to your brain like glue. mamaaaa kupila traktora... SC!

United Kingdom - this song was like a bubble gum. lovely and fun the first few listens but i got tired of it kinda quickly, sadly

category: i can recognize the talent here but i guess it’s just not for me?

Latvia - i’ve seen so many people hyping this and everytime i listen it’s like yeah this is good! and then i don’t feel the urge to listen again

Spain - yeah the performance was captivating but... that’s where it ends for me

Italy - it’s nothing Wrong with the song itself but it didn’t grab me and i had so many other options from sanremo i’d rather see here than Another Male Italian Ballad and this time by a returning artist on top of it so uhhhh yeah

France - i’ve listened to la zarra before the contest so i had some hopes for her and they were not fulfilled )): i like the disco beat and the last chorus - because that’s when everything finally reaches a fullness it should have reached WAY earlier in the song. do you feel me?

Moldova - you know i think i just need a few more listens to this and i’ll get around to it

Ukraine - don’t have much to say about it but it’s alright!

Georgia - this is that kind of song that you only hear in eurovision but when you do you absolutely love it and she does have very impressive vocals, i gotta say

category: they’re fine i guess/i don’t care!!!!!!/no that’s definitely not for me

Belgium - song is kinda catchy i’m ngl. but i cannnnnNOT cope with his styling.

Azerbaijan - it’s cute! that’s about it

Albania - i’ve listened to this exactly once and it was alright but nothing core shaking you know?

Netherlands - this one i think is alright everytime i hear it and then i immediately forget how it goes after it’s done. i couldn’t sing it back to you know matter how i tried honestly

Denmark - yeah it’s fine

Cyprus - i don’t caaaare i don’t care it’s alright but i don’t caaare

Lithuania - ehhhhh why couldn’t we have had beatrich instead ):

Germany - i guess i see why people like it but yeah no this is Not my thing at all

Australia - same with this

Armenia - this could go in the other category above here but.. i don’t like it enough actually

Iceland - yeah no. i don’t get it

Greece - for the love of god couldn’t someone have paired him up with an experienced songwriter and/or producer here because there are many great ideas but they just sound like a mess? it sounds so unfinished?? and i think i really would’ve liked this if it just sounded more... polished. worked on.

Israel - again a mess of a song with too many ideas in it and a very weird build. can’t get around to it

category: good god no

Ireland - someone asked an ai to write the most generic song ever and this is what we got

Romania - dude. bro. no.

Poland - this could’ve been a very basic but somewhat ok entry had there just not been the whole story with how it was picked and what kind of person she is

San Marino - this song feels like a threat. and WHAT is with the singer’s posture?? STAND UP STRAIGHT jesus christ

and there we have it! how much do we agree?

[thylacinetears]

I've taken forever to post this, but here's my full ESC2023 ranking!

With comments and scores out of 10! Long post obvs:

#37 Romania: DGT - Theodor Andrei: (0.5) Gross, boring, just all-around terrible. The staging is awful. The singing is bad ("aLL oF YouR DEmoNs coMe SCREEEMIMANNEHHH" haunts my dreams). The lyrics are gross, and the attempt at wordplay doesn't even make sense? All of it is trying so, so hard to be sexy and failing miserably. Half a point for having some Romanian, but that's it.

#36 San Marino: Like An Animal - Piqued Jacks: (1.0) Worst singer this year and it's not even close. The lyrics are also terrible and kinda give me creepy vibes. 100 songs in the national final and this is the best they can get? But it does get one point for having a pretty good instrumental, and the drummer is killing it.

#35 Albania: Duje - Albina & Familja Kelmendi: (2.0) Really overdramatic. I don't like the instrumental, it's way too sparse and random. The message is meant to be pro-family but it just comes off as anti-divorce? But the intention is nice, and Albania having a song in their own language for once is nice.

#34 Greece: What They Say - Victor Vernicos: (2.5) Just generic. There's not much I can say about this song because I forget it every time I stop listening. It's not intolerable to listen to, I guess?

#33 Germany: Blood & Glitter - Lord of the Lost: (2.5) It's unique, but somehow really boring. I don’t really like this genre so I'm biased, but this is just noise to me.

#32 Switzerland: Watergun - Remo Forrer: (3.0) Nice voice and piano, but wtf is Switzerland doing singing about war? I don't like the lyrical execution of the concept at all. Definitely not a fan.

#31 Malta: Dance (our own party) - The Busker: (3.5) It's a nice sax riff, but they run it into the goddamn ground. The rest of the song just isn't very good. It's cool, but kinda annoying.

#30 Ireland: We Are One - Wild Youth: (3.5) Also very generic, but it has a nice arena-pop sound to it. The message is well-intentioned, though so incredibly overdone.

#29 Lithuania: Stay - Monika Linkyte: (4.0) Nice concept, but it just sounds really bland to me. I don't really know what I don't like about this song, but it just doesn't click with me.

#28 Denmark: Breaking My Heart - Reiley: (4.0) It is very much corporate TikTok bait. But there is a good song underneath all that, and I actually like the vocoder.

#27 Croatia: Mama SC - Let 3: (5.0) Yeah, it's very weird. I don't like the repetition, but I do unironically like the instrumental in the "Onaj mali psihopat" part. Not the best novelty/political song, but not the worst - solid 5/10.

#26 Azerbaijan: Tell Me More - TuralTuranX: (5.5) I like it, it's quite nice and feel-good. But it seems like a complete rip-off of Something Good by Bic Runga?

#25 Poland: Solo - Blanka: (5.5) Ignoring the context and that live performance… It's a bop! It's not super original but it's really catchy and fun.

#24 Israel: Unicorn - Noa Kirel: (6.0) Kinda disappointing, after all the hype. (Why couldn't she have saved Thought About That for ESC instead!) But it has a nice chorus, and some good hooks.

#23 United Kingdom: I Wrote A Song - Mae Muller: (6.0) Very British, and very pop! But that chorus just doesn't really hit for me, and I'm not a fan of the spoken word part.

#22 Cyprus: Break a Broken Heart - Andrew Lambrou: (6.0) This is actually a banger though! I'm biased because Australia, but still. Simple concept but good execution.

#21 Georgia: Echo - Iru: (6.0) No, I don't know what on earth is going on in the lyrics either - guess that's just Georgia though. I love the drama of the instrumental, and Iru has a really powerful voice!

#20 Portugal: Ai Coracao - Mimicat: (6.5) It's cool! I love the culture, and Mimicat has a great voice. But for some reason it doesn't really click with me.

#19 Moldova: Soarele si luna - Pasha Parfeni: (6.5) I'm usually a big fan of the folktronica entries, but this doesn't quite hook me as much as Fulenn or SHUM. But it's still pretty good, and I love the concept of the lyrics!

#18 Serbia: Samo mi se spava - Luke Black: (7.0) Super unique! It's good, it's just that there's so many good entries this year, so it doesn't stand out so much. Gives me Grimes vibes, like a hybrid of Violence and My Name Is Dark.

#17 Belgium: Because Of You - Gustaph: (7.0) So incredibly unapologetically queer, and I love it for that. Such a fun song, makes me want to get up and dance!

#16 Iceland: Power - Dilja: (7.0) Uplifting, upbeat, poppy - this season needed a song like this. She absolutely kills those vocals, too!

#15 Italy: Due Vite - Marco Mengoni: (7.5) Really gorgeous and emotional, with incredibly beautiful lyrics. I get chills when that second chorus comes in, honestly. But it's just not quite as good as Italy's other entries.

#14 Armenia: Future Lover - Brunette: (7.5) Has a real 2000s pop/RnB diva vibe, and I love the lyrics. The instrumental is amazing, and I love the blend of genres.

#13 Ukraine: Heart Of Steel - TVORCHI: (7.5) I love the RnB groove mixing with the dramatic violins! It's really grown on me since it was first released, it's just super slick.

#12 Austria: Who the Hell is Edgar? - Teya & Salena: (7.5) So wacky, and yet such a bop. It manages to successfully balance a hilarious concept, catchy beat, and somehow a serious and relevant message? I actually can't believe they managed it. Well done, enjoy your gas station champagne from me streaming it, lmao.

#11 Latvia: Aija - Sudden Lights: (8.0) There's no other song like it this year (or maybe any year!), and I love its post-rock sound. However I admit that at least 50% of why I love this song is that outro.

#10 Norway: Queen of Kings - Alessandra: (8.0) THE pop banger we needed! I love the electronic bassline and Alessandra's incredible vocals.

#9 Australia: Promise - Voyager: (8.0) Not at all my genre, but I love it! That electronic intro and his vocals are everything. I don't like the scream after the second chorus, but the rest is amazing.

#8 Czechia: My Sister's Crown - Vesna: (8.5) Unique, cultural, powerful, and arguably the best chorus of the year. Those harmonies, man. Czechia is absolutely killing it at the moment.

#7 Estonia: Bridges - ALIKA: (8.5) This makes me really emotional, as I definitely relate to the lyrics. But even without considering that, this is just everything good about ballads - gorgeous piano, excellent vocals, and beautifully convincing delivery.

#6 Spain: Eaea - Blanca Paloma: (9.0) I'm so glad Spain went traditional this year. Hypnotising, gentle and yet powerful. The imagery of the lyrics is so beautiful, and of course Blanca's incredible voice carries the whole thing.

#5 Netherlands: Burning Daylight - Mia Nicolai & Dion Cooper: (9.0) The Netherlands continues its sad era with this gorgeous song. I love the two voices, the lyrics, the slightly detuned piano... But most of all I love the outro - I relate to it so much.

#4 Finland: Cha Cha Cha - Kaarija: (9.0) THE icon of the season. This really is worth the hype - fun, dancey, crazy, party! It really hits its stride in the second half, but honestly I just love the whole thing.

#3 France: Evidemment - La Zarra: (9.5) I'm a France stan, what can I say! But they just keep sending quality - from the dramatic intro to that incredible disco-pop beat drop to the amazing bridge.

#2 Slovenia: Carpe Diem - Joker Out: (9.5) Basically my favourite from the beginning! It puts you in a good mood from the first line, and just keeps the energy all the way through to the end. My favourite part is the guitar solo after the first chorus leading into the second verse. It's so cool...

#1 Sweden: Tattoo - Loreen: (10.0) Right in my dance-pop loving heart. Loreen is truly like no other - a once-in-a-generation performer. When that second chorus hits... It's almost too perfect. But I love how there's that unusual chord progression to keep you interested, too. There's just nothing to fault about it, I love every single second!

[popblank]

My Eurovision Song Ranking 2023

I have been unusually busy in the last couple of months so this ranking is very late and not too detailed. For this year’s ranking I generally listened to the official videos 3-4 times, though in a few cases I did either watch the video with captions/translations or looked up lyrics. Not feeling that strongly about most of the songs yet.

It’s Loreen

(1) Sweden, Loreen, “Tattoo” – The song is okay but I really like Loreen’s performance, both vocally and onstage. She makes the song compelling in a way that I think few other artists could.

Would listen to again

(2) Finland, Käärijä, “Cha Cha Cha” – Very catchy & instant. The melodic final section makes more sense after reading the lyrics.

(3) Lithuania, Monika Linkyté, “Stay” – Introspective, dramatic, singer-songwritery with a slightly-too-abrupt chorus that is kind of hypnotic. It took a few listens to really grow on me.

(4) United Kingdom, Mae Muller, “I Wrote A Song” – On my first listen I thought, “it’s not bad, though it’s not amazing.” Upon repeat listens I am finding it holds up well and I like that it tells a little story about channeling negative emotions constructively. Hope they have decent staging. 

(5) Portugal, Mimicat, “Ai Coração” – Liking the wordy uptempo Portuguese.

(6) Czechia, Vesna, “My Sister’s Crown” – Dark and dramatic and rather pointedly political; I wonder how good it will sound without the echoing chorus. 

(7) Spain, Blanca Paloma, “EAEA” – I like the flamenco electronic pop, yet feel I should like it more than I do since it seems to follow in the footsteps of “¿Quién maneja mi barca?” (one of my all-time Eurovision favorites). It is a bit hard to follow as it does not quite have the relentless drive of that song.

The rest below the cut:

Enjoy it.  May not seek it out but won’t skip it.

(8) France, La Zarra, “Évidemment” – She really has that dance-pop chanteuse thing going on. It’s compelling as I listen but afterward I can’t remember any part of the song except the title word, and something about her pronunciation of “évidemment” in the official recording is really throwing me off. It almost sounds like an American trying to speak French and it does not sound that way in the live recordings I can find.

(9) Pasha Parfeni, “Soarele şi Luna” – Obvious comparisons to “Shum” and “Fulenn” which were both in my top 5 pre-competition. (Not complaining.)

(10) Ukraine, TVORCHI, “Heart of Steel” – Prefer it to last year’s song, really.

(11) Serbia, Luke Black, “Samo Mi Se Spava” – The music actually evokes video game music in addition to using games as a metaphor.

(12) Austria, Teya & Salena, “Who The Hell Is Edgar?” – Fun, catchy, about something other than the usual topics (love, heartbreak).

(13) Estonia, Alika, “Bridges” – Piano ballad.  I like the repeated rising line in the chorus.

(14) Albania, Albina & Familja Kelmendi, “Duje” – Albania doing what it does.

Okay/Would have to be in the right mood to listen

(15) Iceland, Diljá, “Power” – She has a decent voice and I like the rising line of “oh-oh-oh-oh” at the start of the chorus.

(16) Slovenia, Joker Out, “Carpe Diem” – Musically fine but does not grab me. I generally like the concept of the lyrics but would hope for a little more of the implied angst to come through.

(17) Azerbaijan, TuralTuranX, “Tell Me More” – It doesn’t sound like a Swedish import, which is a pleasant surprise.

(18) Norway, Alessandra, “Queen of Kings” – Initially catchy but really isn’t standing up for me on repeats. I may be biased because MGP was the only national selection that I paid any attention to this year other than Melodifestivalen and my favorites were Ulrikke and Rasmus Thall.

(19) Armenia, Brunette, “Future Lover” – Thankful for the changeup partway through after the twinkly piano & strings. Little bit hard to follow the lyrics but reading them I like the idea of the song. Not a fan of the video though.

(20) Latvia, Sudden Lights, “ Aijā” – Solid. It’s fine.

There is something in it I might like, but not enough for me to seek it out

(21) Croatia, Let 3, “Mama ŠČ!” – Consciously offbeat. Not sure what’s going on, it’s catchy but the song doesn’t seem interesting enough on its own unless they can attach it to a great stage performance.

(22) Australia, Voyager, “Promise” – Starts out OK, nice that it goes a bit harder but only for maybe 10 seconds. With the barrage of questions in the verses, the whole thing feels like an interrogation followed by a bunch of demands. Sounds good though.

(25) Georgia, Iru, “Echo” – Entertainingly dramatic, but kind of hard to understand and the lyrics barely make sense.

(23) Germany, Lord of the Lost, “Blood and Glitter” – Sonically a nice change of pace.  A bit repetitive without using that to good effect.

(24) Italy, Marco Mengoni, “Due Vite” – It’s very Italian. Not really sticking yet but it might grow on me (“L’Essenziale” did). 

(26) Belgium, Gustaph, “Because of You” – I should like this more (upbeat, dance-y, uplifting) but my brain just hears background music.

(27) Denmark, Reiley, “Breaking My Heart” – Denmark and Cyprus can hang out and mope together. The repetition isn’t doing it for me.

(28) Ireland, Wild Youth, “We Are One” – All it needs is a music video where people of all shapes, sizes, colors, genders dance around together (see also: the videos from “Story of My Life” and Malta’s “I Am What I Am”).

(29) Netherlands, Mia Nicolai & Dion Cooper, “Burning Daylight” – Talky midtempo. Vaguely Coldplay at end.

(30) Cyprus, Andrew Lambrou, “Broken Heart” – Dramatic wailer, lots of falsetto. Voice is more interesting than song.

(31) Greece, Victor Vernicos, “What They Say” – Different direction for Greece. Not sure about this boom-clap thing at the end.

(32) Romania, Theodor Andrei, “D.G.T. (Off and On)” – Kind of enjoying the bluesy 6/8; reading the lyrics it’s a familiar theme but the official music video stage performance is a bit off-putting.

Dislike outweighs like

(33) Malta, The Busker, “Dance” – While I feel the message of the song, the saxophone riff and “I feel better in my sweater” are deeply annoying to me.

(34) Poland, Blanka, “Solo” – Not offensively bad, just vaporously insubstantial.

(35) Israel, Noa Kirel, “Unicorn” – What exactly is the power of a unicorn, mythologically?

(36) Switzerland, Remo Forrer, “Watergun” – Feels faux-deep and particularly odd coming from Switzerland. Sounds like an attempt to cross “Arcade” (playing games theme) and last year’s Swiss entry (muddled message).

(37) San Marino, Piqued Jacks, “Like An Animal” – Kind of like Finland’s song last year but less fun. “I can smell you like an animal,” charming. 

[charlotte-bopp]

so eurovision rankings.....

My ranking the big 5 and Ukraine for eurovision 2023

France

UK

Ukraine

Germany

Italy

Spain

Just my opinions right now It might change during the next week but as of Wed 3rd.

I'll try making my full rankings soon.

[pinan-stutor]

My Top 10 for ESC 2023

Might do YouTube embeds and/or one-sentence commentary later, but I wanna at least make my first ESC post while I've got some brain momentum!

1. Käärijä - Cha Cha Cha (Suomi/Finland 🇫🇮)

2. Teya & Salena - Who The Hell Is Edgar? (Austria 🇦🇹)

3. Pasha Parfeni - Soarele Şi Luna (Moldova 🇦🇩)

4. Alessandra - Queen of Kings (Norway 🇧🇻)

5. Voyager - Promise (Australia 🇦🇺)

6. La Zarra - Évidemment (France 🇨🇵)

7. The Busker - Dance (Our Own Party) (Malta 🇲🇹)

8. Lord Of The Lost - Blood & Glitter (Germany 🇩🇪)

9. Joker Out - Carpe Diem (Slovenia 🇸🇮)

10. Mae Muller - I Wrote A Song (United Kingdom 🇬🇧)

[borisbubbles]

2024 Ranking Announcement

Regardless of what happens tonight, I will still rank this year. The last two days have proven one thing: This is a DISASTROUS contest. Never has Eurovision been this divided, hijacked and dismembered by factors that have NOTHING to do with music. Tension and toxicity are at an all-time high. The decision to include Israel has snowballed into a calamity beyond any of our wildest imagination. But the contest has long since been a place of happiness, of safety for me through the years. A beacon through manic depression. Now Eurovision has become the manic depression in my life - and these beautiful artists, male, female and neither, asked for none of this garbage. They deserve recognition for their craft.

This line-up is, after all, pretty darn good. And thus, I will rank them. I will try to do it quickly (before i leave on holiday - around the end of June) because I don't want to drag it out for another year, but I will sing the praises of these unfortunate artists, stuck in this shitstorm of a year.

I do not like everyone, so do expect the usual harsh words for those stuck in the basement of my ranking. But I'm sure I can muster ~positivity~ for most of the others.

I will do my part in voting for my favourite SONGS tonight, and I hope many will do the same. Let us not make matters any worse by voting based on flag. Vote for the MUSIC, not the flag that comes with it.

In the words of my home country's favourite entry:

United we stand, together we will fall.

[peaceowatermeln]

you wanna know what my thing is about the jury? well too bad, i’m gonna tell you anyway.

two words: elitism and subjectivity

so, the point of the jury is that they (supposedly) have more music knowledge and therefore are better and more impartial judges of music, right? (i mean… we know that’s bullshit but that’s the design)

well here’s the thing. like most art forms, music is subjective, meaning what someone thinks about a song is influenced by their own taste, opinions, and feelings. this doesn’t magically disappear once you learn… i dunno, how time signatures work, for example. someone with music knowledge would be able to hear a song with something musically neat in it and go “hey, that’s neat” but ultimately that doesn’t change if the sound of the song lines up with their own taste.

(and as someone with a music degree, lemme tell you, having music knowledge doesn’t make a listening experience any more helpful or enjoyable.)

so, in our eurovision setting, where the entire point of the contest is to rank songs and crown a winner based on what is the most universally liked, and everybody voting (including our beloved juries) has their own opinions and biases about music and what is appealing to them, why are juries held as these objective elites with The Facts of what good music is? why are the opinions of 5 people who can maybe acknowledge a cool drum pattern worth the same as the opinions of the rest of a country’s over-18 population?

because they’re more impartial? sure jan.

[yep-ishouldbesleeping]

Are we ready to rage for the ranking everyone??

[thisismyobsessionnow]

Dizzy by Olly Alexander just jumped up in my ranking because it made me think about Jance

[eurovision-del]

Finland have definitely become one to watch in recent years, so going into Eurovision season they were one of the countries I was most excited for! With UMK happening this weekend, here's my ranking of the competing songs:

Mikael Gabriel & Nublu – Vox populi

Sini Sabotage – Kuori mua

Jesse Markin – Glow

Cyan Kicks – Dancing With Demons

Sexmane – Mania

Sara Siipola – Paskana

Windows95man – No Rules!

Despite being just seven songs, this was a super hard selection to rank – honestly you could ask me tomorrow and I’d probably switch them around again. This is a very even competition in my eyes - every song is good in its own way and I enjoy them all, but there's no standout. I was in a weird position after my first listen through all these songs when they were released where I felt really positive about this selection, but then struggled to recall any individual song. A couple of weeks to get familiar with them all has definitely helped.

Right now, I think my favourite is Vox populi. It’s a super fun track, their style of Eurodance with the slightly rockier guitars and drums creates this fantastic energy – it’s great pump up music. It’s also pretty cool that it’s bilingual, with a rap verse each in Finnish and Estonian. In fact, we’ve got a fair amount of rap and hip-hop here which I love to see, since I feel they're genres that go underrepresented in Eurovision and national finals in general. Even better, they’re all very distinct from each other. Kuori mua is another rap track, but it couldn’t be any different, with the attitude it exudes and its super slick beat. I love the sharpness of it all, and how it mixes in the piano in the second half to create a more positive sound, lifting some of the tension but keeping all the energy.

The overall production level in all these songs is great – this whole selection is high quality and just sounds good to my ears. The one slight exception is No Rules, which I feel goes a bit too heavy on the fake eagle screeches, although it very much fits the overall tone of the song. This one slight annoyance, and the fact that I preferred Vox populi when it comes to Eurodance, was what made it end up at the bottom of my list, but I honestly feel bad about it – it’s still a very fun song and does what it’s doing  well. I didn’t want to rank any of these songs last!

Because the songs are so even, I couldn't even suggest what deserves to win this Saturday. It's going to all depend on performance for me. Finland are never going to do better than last year's Eurovision result, but UMK has honestly become one of the best national finals over the past few years, and I hope this is enough to keep up the qualification streak they're on.

[docholligay]

37. Switzerland

The absolute stones. The brass ones. I mean, I can almost appreciate it’s so bad.

This is a very pale “war is bad mkay” song, and more specifically this is a song from a sad Swiss boy about how he doesn’t want to go to war and play with real guns :(. Which, given the way of the world, I suppose could be touching, minus the fact that Swiss has had the policy of “Go fuck yourselves, i don’t give a shit” since 1815, and has not participated in a non-civil war since then. And the civil was was in the 1840s.

This would be akin to some 19 year old from America singing about his fears of land invasion. Oh no, wait, we’ve been invaded by land much more recently than the Swiss have been involved in a conflict!

Given their extreme neutrality which has come under fire for actually being, you know, a kind of evil, this songs moves from being milquetoast to offensive. Switzerland serves the world’s elite and stands on the sidelines to see who’s left standing at the end.

In the EuroBubble, I’ve gotten some blowback for my extreme dislike  of this song, because Switzerland has compulsory military service, to which I would say “When you know you are never going to war, it becomes an inconvenient summer camp.” Swiss military service also allows a number of schemes that can get you out of anything military at all: civil service, assisting firefighters, and, even “being declared unfit for military OR civilian service” which is what 20% of conscripts do and weirdly only comes with an extra tax, and weirdly, is more common for conscripts from rich cities hmmm hmm hmmmmm.

I’ll get my ass chewed for this, but this song would feel much more compelling coming from a country like Ukraine (Who wouldn’t let this go through because pf their approach to the war) or even Israel (Who would ABSOLUTELY NEVER let that go through because it would be deeply critical of the government) you know, countries where conscripts face a chance of actual death. Finland, even! I am willing to accept so many answers here, but Switzerland SURE AS SHIT is not one of them.

It’s so tone deaf, I would hate it in peace time, but now it seems so distasteful when Switzerland is rubbing their little temples about whether it’s naughty and bad to not send Ukraine guns but Russian oligarchs can keep their art (which is just a kind of hidden international money--like gold) all over the place.

Unfortunately, he actually can sing this song.

I don’t think my reaction will be singular, and I don’t think the song has enough “tricks” to overcome that in a non-juried semi.

Disclaimer

[itsmeimcathy]

Europe blink twice if sweden and israel are holding you at gunpoint

[rewritingcanon]

What pop music do you like? what have you been listening to lately?

oh baby the songs i listen to all came out six-ten years ago and they’re the clubbing music you white girl dance to 😭😭 sorry to disappoint!!

all time favs are lady gaga and glass animals. i used to be OBSESSED with melanie martinez and i still know all her songs soooo. still obsessed. the best era of music would always come around may when eurovision would happen bcuz im not kidding they have the best fucking songs but i will be boycotting from now on soooo. idk if that only includes watching the contest or if that includes listening to the songs, i will have to find out.

im just trying to think of consistent people i listen to and im really struggling urhm. used to be obsessed with nicki minaj and i still know so many of her songs but i do not support her and havent for a while…

in terms of recency i guess ive been getting into pastel ghost and crystal castles? idk if thats pop but i like how it massages my brain. iris by crystal castles is SO good

yeah this was a long way to say my recent tastes is actually decades old 😭

[s4pphic-sh3nan1gans]

slovenia's eurovision entry has me in a chokehold