#FALLS TO MY KNEES AND SCREAMS INTO THE VOID | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

idcbabyialreadylostmymind · 1 year

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L'appel du Vide

Pairing- Sully Family x Sully!Reader

Summary- You feel the urge to engage in destructive behaviors just to feel alive and your family wants to get to the bottom.

Pt.1 pt.2 pt.3

Warnings- self destructive thoughts/actions, getting slapped, biting someone's ear off, hateful thoughts, description of self harm, self harm, blood/bleeding, crying lmk if I missed something

A/N- did I cry writing the last part bc of my crippling mommy issues yes yes I did but we don't talk about it also tell me how it is 🤭🤭

It's like a call to a void, the adrenaline of putting yourself in danger. Like jumping off a cliff not knowing if your banshee is going to catch you, or slicing your hand with an open blade, or getting into a fight with someone ten times bigger than you. It made you feel real, made you feel alive. And if your not doing it your thinking of it. So why wouldn't you go with your siblings to the old battle field.

"Tuk keep up." Lo'ak said as you pushed a branch out of the way. "Why'd you bring her?" Spider asked and Lo'ak huffed. "She's always like 'I'm telling if you don't let me come you know your not supposed to go to the old battlefield " Lo'ak mocks your younger sibling only making Spider laugh and you roll your eyes at his childish tactics. Tuk pokes her tongue out at him and Kiri comes to her defense. "Don't pick on her." And finally you make it, you and Lo'ak crouch Kiri beside you. "Dad is going to ground you," she whispered to you, "shush can you stop." You reply and she only rolls her eyes. "For life."

behind some bushes you and Lo'ak look around there was all kind of rubble and metal on the ground you hit Lo'ak on the stomach to get his attention. "Let's look around." You say before immediately jumping back, Avatars. "Shit." You whisper Lo'ak looks at them his body freezes. "We have to tell dad." Kiri whispers. Lo'ak goes to touch the microphone on his neck. "Hey dad." Lo'ak whispers, your eyes were glued to the avatars.

"Lo'ak." You hear your father's gruff voice over the ear piece. "Yes we are at the old battle field and there are some Avatars we've never seen them." Silence, "Who is we." Was all your father said afterward you and Lo'ak share a look. "Me, Y/N, spider, Kiri and Tuk." He paused before he said Tuk and you could hear your father sigh. "Just stay safe, Lo'ak Lo'ak!"

Suddenly before you could think your queue was being pulled roughly making you wince in pain. You look around at the kidnappers around you. The avatars. "Show me your fingers." An older man said to Lo'ak and he flips him off and give a screechy hiss and you laugh loudly making Lo'ak chuckle. "Your his alright and you," he says turning around to you pointing a finger. "Your a cute little thing aren't ya' think that's funny?" He asked. You cringe at his statement. "I do actually." He smirks gripping your face. "We'll keep you." He said and all you did was hiss it was deeper and louder than the one Lo'ak previously did.

He gives you a hard slap and all you did was smile as you hear your mother's war call. The man's face fell, "I will kill you as many times as I have to demon." Was the last thing you heard before you saw your father and brother, Neteyam sweep in and get the avatars holding your siblings but they couldn't help you but you didn't need any. As your father held you sister in her arms you took this chance to kick the man holding you kick him in the knee he filps you around arms locking around you and before you knew it you opened your mouth clamping down on the first thing near you and it came off in your mouth the taste of iron on your tongue filling your mouth, the man screamed letting you fall to the ground. You jump up and spit the piece of skin in your mouth blood spilling from it as you spit. "She bit my ear off! The bitch bit my ear off!" He yelled you smiled as you pick a gun up that he had dropped and run off next to your dad.

It was hell after you got home. Your father yelled at you and Lo'ak about how irresponsible you two were and how stupid it was to attack the man holding you. But, this was the usual for you not taking anything to heart but you could see Lo'ak every heart breaking thing your father said to you two it stabbed him a hundred times over. And then your father put everyone of lock down and suddenly everything darkened around you, it felt like you were a dead person in someone you didn't know, like your family and friends weren't really your family and friends.

So there you are sitting at the back of your families home watching the sky, you had the razor blade you swiped from Norm in hand and all of those bad thoughts flew into you again. You griped the balde t as tears fell down your face, "Your not real." Your head thought. "Your nothing." The thoughts consumed you as the blade got closer and closer to your skin and it made contact you held it to the base of your palm. Your eyes clench closed as you held the blade hard and sliced all the way down, the throbbing pain was there and then you take the balde off of your palm and as the blood dropped from your hand, and a sense of comfort fell over you.

Your mother looked at your hand as she wrapped it up, "And you say you accidentally cut yourself when sharpening your dagger." She asked once again and you smile. "Yes I was being stupid I know." You laugh as she lets go of your hand. Before you asked your mother to wrap your hand your father gave you the news you had to leave, it hurt it really did you were leaving the only place you called home but you knew you had to stay strong for your siblings for your Mother.

When you finally made it to the Meykayina all of their eyes were on you and your family it was strange, unsettling. It only got worse the more you stayed there people made fun of you, of your siblings. And that feeling you knew all to well came back you had to cut, and everytime you had a quick explanation. Soon you had scars in various parts of your body, on your sides, inner and outer thighs, your calfs, you even had to wrap you hands up. And after an altercation with Lo'ak and the chiefs son they were forcing you and your siblings to hang out with him and his sister Tsireya. She was nice, sweet you sort of envied her but didn't show it. "Hey forest people." Ao'nung laughed and all you did was roll your eyes. "Hey fish boy." You reply opening your eyes and giving him a sarcastic smile.

He looks taken back but Kiri and Lo'ak burst into laughter as Neteyam hits your arm. "Let's get this day over with." He said getting the ilus saddled up. You stand up and head towards your ikran and they just look at you. "Forest girl where you going!?" Ao'nung yells and you turn around. "I'm going to ride Amhel." And then Neteyam huffed. "What is wrong Neteyam?" Tsireya asked as she lifted her leg over her ilu. "When she rides Amhel that means shes gonna do something stupid and then get in trouble for it." He shook his head as you jumped into her and connected taking off into the sky. It was a dangerous speed, but you didn't care. You did all kinds of things in the air the farther you got into sea. "Flip upside down." You thought and that's what she did. "She's not strapped in!" Tsireya yells watching you as you let your arms swing in the air. Neteyam watched he hates when you did this, but he couldn't stop you.

You made it to the island you land on the warm sand and hop off as the other five to make it to you. Kiri hit you upside the head. "Why are you so stupid always doing dangerous things." She scolded. "Ah and it's not dangerous it's fun have some." You joke rubbing the sore spot she made. "Fun? We rather keep our lives thank you." Neteyam chimed in and you only rolled your eyes. "If I wanted to get scolded I would have stayed with mom and dad..." Trailed off by seeing a huge rock. It was beautiful it started in the water where it has a teal ring, and it goes up as moss and leaves grow on it, it had to be at least fifty felt in the air. "Y/N don't." Neteyam spoke, to late.

You rode Amhel up to the rock and looked down you were sure to die if you jumped and no one caught you. "Perfect." You thought.

Meanwhile on the shore your older brother and sister sit down and put their face in there palms. "Told you, something stupid." Neteyam muttered to the group. Ao'nung had his transparent eyebrows furrowed as he looks between you and your brother. "What is she going to do?" He asked as you got of of Amhel. "Just watch it's so cool." Lo'ak said.

You disconnected you queue as you let the side of your head. "Remember catch me." You whisper to her and she only gives you a small chirp in response as she takes flight. She circles around the rock getting ready to catch her rider. You take one more look down stepping back a few steps you take a deep breath. Closing your eyes you run and jump. Falling through the air you could hear Tsireya yelling, "She's gonna die, she's not gonna catch her!!" This time your siblings got up and started yelling Neteyam jumped to his ilu ready to rush toward you and then everyone stopped as the heard you. "Why are you guys so serious." From behind them.

"Holy shit that was cool." Lo'ak laughed you got off of Amhel and walked to them sitting down in the sand letting the warm sun hit your skin. "I thought you were going to die." Tsireya said sitting down next to you. "Not today." You say smiling as you close your eyes.

"You did What!" You father yelled, you have Lo'ak a side eye, why did he have to be such a blabber mouth. "It wasn't anything serious me and Amhel used to do it all the time back home." You say putting your hand on your hip. "Okay we'll talk about that later but you jumped off a cliff that was over fifty feet in the air, what the fuck is wrong with you." Clenching your teeth, "Nothing is wrong with, I'm sorry I'm not an uptight asshole and like to have fun." You say suddenly feeling defensive as to why he asked what was wrong with you. "Don't curse at me and that's not fun you could have killed yourself." He yelled and you only rolled your eyes. "No more riding Amhel." He said and your face dropped. "What t-thats not fair." You protest before your father clicks his tongue. "Fine." Was all you said before storming up to your room of the pod.

It had been a little past eclipse and your shoulders felt heavy and that question ran through your mind over and over again, "What the fuck is wrong with you." Your father's words never stuck but this did. Your hands shaked you jumped out from under the hand-made blanket your mother gave you. You tiptoe over to your bag and rummage through it and you found it. You bit your lip as you looked at the blade. You sit on your cot and grabbed the blanket you were previously covering up with, putting it between your teeth you bit down, now you look at the blade and you press it onto your upper arm, pressing down hard you guide the blade down you sighed and bite the blanket because of the pain, but the more pressure you put into the cuts the more mental relief you felt. You dropped the blade and looked at your hand you held it so hard it cut through your fingers.

You let the blanket slip through your teeth and your breath was heavy and then you look up and your eyes were met with ones of your mother. You gasp. Flipping the blanket over your arm and hide the blade. Neytiri walks closer bottom lips shaking, "Show me." She demands and you only look away wiping the tears away from you face. "Show me." She says this time a little harsher. "Fine mom, you wanna see!" You say loudly getting up and the balde falls to the ground, you show her what you had just did, then you ripped the bandages you had on your thighs and then your hands. "Is this what you wanted to see." You say crying. Neytiri tilts her head as she falls to the ground. "My baby, my daughter my special girl." She cried out holding the blade throwing it across the room. "Mom don't cry." You say holding yourself looking from your mother's broken figure.

Neytiri was gasping through her tears, "Was it me was it Jake, did we do something, did we do something wrong I know we haven't been the best parents but I tried to protect you I-"

"No it's not you or dad it's me I'm fucked up, I'm fucked up but it's not you mom it's not you." You say falling to the ground next to her. She looks at you and holds your arms, going over every scar she helped heal and guilt fills her. You cry watching her reaction and then she brings you close, "It's okay my special baby, my sweet girl." She coos rocking you back and forth as your tears soak her chest. "I'm sorry mama I'm sorry."

"nothing to be sorry for my sweet." She said guiding you back to the bed holding you she pressed sweet loving kisses to your wrist. "Nothing wrong my sweet girl." She whispered holding you as she did when you were a child and your cries softened and your eyes began to get heavy for the first time you felt loved, you felt safe.

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andvys · 3 months

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Dancing with our hands tied | Prologue

I knew there was no one in the world who could take it I had a bad feeling

Warnings: mentions of injuries, bruises and scars, mention of the upside down, this is post s4, enemies to lovers. mentions of death and the upside down. readers features are not mentioned, besides the accident with the hair dye in the past

Pairing: Steve Harrington x fem!reader

Summary: You and Steve have never seen eye to eye, and it never changed, not even when you were pulled into a world of monsters and risked your life to save him. But tension had always been between you both, something that neither of you ever wanted to admit -- but how much longer can you take it when the pull between you gets stronger and stronger each second you spend by each others side?

Word count: 3.6k+

Author's note: A new fic and another shoutout to my queen @hellfire--cult 🤍 thank you for working on the ideas for this story with me, I'm so excited for this one!

You’re running through the darkness, barefoot, the soil feels wet and slippery beneath your feet, twigs and branches scratch your skin open, the air feels icy cold, the wind blows through your hair and goosebumps arise on your skin, though not because of the cold but because of the growling behind you, the creatures that reach for you, that scream for you, that want your blood and your flesh.

Your lungs feel on fire and so do your legs, but you don’t stop running.

You run faster and faster, hoping to find shelter though this forest seems so big and never ending, there is no way out of this, no way out of here.

There is no shelter and there is nowhere to run – and yet, you don’t stop, you don’t let them get to you, you don’t let them touch you.

Rain starts falling, thunder rumbles through the woods and the ground beneath you suddenly starts shaking, making your knees buckle.

Desperation clings onto you, you can’t fall, if you do then you lose.

The sky becomes redder, shining angrily, the lightning now comes for you, crashing down on the ground right before you, causing you to yelp in surprise.

And that is all that it took, an obstacle thrown into the path that was destined for you to stay on. It caught you off guard, you no longer looked at the way before you, you slowed down and you slipped on the muddy ground.

You can feel yourself falling and it feels as though it takes forever for you to crash, you can feel the breath getting knocked out of you, you can feel the tear running down your cheek, you can feel the darkness taking ahold of you and despite knowing that you are going down, the fall still startles you, making you whimper in pain when you hit your head on something, your vision blurs and your skin aches and despite it, you push yourself up but it’s too late.

The vines are wrapping itself around your body, like snakes that are about to poison you. Panic rises in your chest and your eyes widen when you lift your head to see the creatures running towards you, getting closer and closer.

“No!” Your own voice sounds so unfamiliar to you, so filled with fear and desperation.

You struggle against the vines, though they hold you down so strongly. You try kicking against it, you try fighting against it but nothing helps, nothing will help you, nothing will save you.

Suddenly, you feel something sharp in your skin, in your legs, in your calves, in your arms, everywhere. You scream in pain – in pain and in anger. Tears stream down your face, blood seeps from the ripped open skin, the metallic taste now lingering on your tongue and that will be the last thing you will taste, the last thing you will see is the blood red sky, the last thing you will feel is how you’re being ripped apart.

But even now, as you’re slipping into a cruel death, all you think about is him.

You’re awaiting the darkness, the void – though it’s not what greets you when your eyes close. Light greets you. Bright, disgusting light that makes you want to close your eyes again. Fuck. You forgot to close the curtains last night.

A groan falls from your lips and you pull the blanket up higher, hiding your face from the sun that shines directly into your room. You pay no mind to your racing heart or the fear that still lingers from the dream you just woke from – you ignore it, as you always do.

This one was unlike all the others that have been haunting you for weeks now. Instead of hands around your neck, and the cruel blue eyes staring into your soul as he tried to kill you, it’s been the creatures that wanted you dead this time – and somehow they caused you less fear than he did.

You sink deeper into your mattress, enjoying the comfort and warmth of your bed.

Nothing awaits you today, absolutely nothing.

With a sigh, you lift your blanket and sit up, rubbing your eyes before you squint them open. You pull your legs up to your chest and prop your chin up on your knees, looking out your window as you get lost in your thoughts.

You are taken back to your dreams when the sun gets brighter, reminding you of the lights that surged through the red sky when the creatures – the monsters ripped you open. Not shying away from digging their teeth and claws into your delicate skin. – And to think that you once thought that Tommy and Carol were monsters.. Now you know what real monsters look like, feel like..

They never got under your skin like the monsters in your dreams did, not even when they thought they did. They threw cruel words at you, made up rumors about you that circled around school but as entertaining as it was to some of the students of Hawkins High, you just didn’t care what they thought of you, what they whispered about you whenever you passed by the gossiping girls or the boys who would smirk whenever you would walk through the hallways.

Just like all the other new freshman girls, you were fresh meat, a little lamb in the midst of a lion's den, ready to be ripped apart – or at least, that’s what you were meant to be. The first time Kelli Robertson approached you in order to intimidate you and to make it known who she was, she walked away with a split open lip after she tugged at your pigtails and made fun of the way you dressed. She never approached you again after this and neither did her friends.

You were no violent person but it had always been easy for you to lose your temper around girls and boys who loved to think that they were better than anyone else, that their status in school was something deemed special and meaningful outside of it, that they could push around the ones weaker than them.

Maybe you weren’t better than them, you gave them back what they gave to others, but at least they deserved it. And with them, you had the power to fight back whenever they came at you.

But when it came to him, you didn’t have much power to fight back – only luck was on your side, that night. A battered house you were supposed to die in, saved you. It’s ironic, really.

It’s been a few weeks since the evil had been defeated and you had won – since your friends had won, but not without scars and bruises.

Eddie almost died.

Max almost died.

And you, you almost died too.

Maybe you should have.

You drag yourself out of bed, like every morning, ignoring the sharp pain in your side, the ache that still lingers in your neck – you wonder if it will stay there forever now.

You hate to look at yourself in the mirror, but you still do.

You wash your face and brush your teeth and you stare at your reflection, hating what you see. The bruises that have not healed yet, the ones on your face and on your neck, the scar that he left for you to always look at.

With a sigh, you turn away and leave the bathroom. You make yourself a cup of coffee and sit on your windowsill. You pull your knees up to your chest, closing your eyes for a moment, you enjoy the way the sun feels on your skin. You missed it, the warmth, the smell of spring in the air and giving yourself this moment of peace every morning.

You feel the beating of your heart, the kind that fills your body with fear – the fear that will always linger now.

You can’t stand it.

And you can’t stand that the only way to get rid of it is to be around the person who hates you the most.

The one that ripped your heart out more than once, with nothing but cruel words.

You should stay away, but you can’t.

And besides, your words are just as cruel.

Walking into Family Video, a small smile tugs at your lips when Steve’s frown greets you. He is leaning against the counter, a pencil in his hand as he works on the crossword in the newspaper. He instantly straightens up when he locks eyes with you, a sigh already falling from his lips.

He has been seeing you more often than usual in the past few weeks – every time you walk in here, he ignores the relief in his chest and the pain when he sees those fading bruises on your skin.

By the look on your face, he can tell that you are up to no good.

You’re wearing a sweet smile on your face – one that could never be directed at him. An iced coffee in your hand that you got from the shop across the street, he sees you walk in there, every afternoon.

“Hey Steve,” you smile as you walk up to the counter, placing the cup in front of him. “I got you a coffee.”

Steve raises his eyebrows at you, glancing down at the coffee, not quite believing you or the sickly sweet tone in your voice, you even called him by his name, something that never happens.

“What’d you put in there?”

You chuckle, shrugging at him. “Nothing, I figured you could use some coffee and some company, you look bored.”

The store is empty and he already stacked up all the new tapes. Yes, he is bored but he doesn’t believe you for a second. You’re here because you are bored.

You tap your manicured nails against the counter, tilting your head and looking at him oh so sweetly – your lashes flutter, your lips are curled into a soft smile, you’re wearing a pretty blouse underneath your denim jacket and heart shaped glasses on your head, you smell like cherries. If you weren’t you, he would be flirting away already but unfortunately you are you.

The girl he cannot stand, even now, after you risked your life for a person that means so much to him, after you almost bled out and died fighting someone who was ready to kill you.

He ignores the pang in his chest when he looks at the faint bruises around your neck, you almost got matching wounds now – only his were caused by bats, yours were caused by someone else’s hands. He redirects his eyes to your face instead, not bearing to look at the marks any longer.

He looks into your eyes for a moment, trying to figure you out the way he always does – though you will always remain a mystery to him.

Tempting, he thinks – the coffee, not you, definitely not you.

With a sigh, he reaches for the cup and just as he goes to wrap his hand around it, you beat him to it, snatching it back.

“Oops, I changed my mind.”

You wrap your lips around the straw, keeping your eyes on him as you drink the coffee that you definitely did not order for Steve.

He clenches his jaw, eyes flashing with annoyance as they lock with yours again.

Satisfaction fills your chest, you love teasing him.

“Robin isn’t here, so what the hell do you want, Blondie?”

At that, you clench your jaw.

You can’t stand the stupid nickname that he hasn’t stopped using since Sophomore year.

You wanted that blonde you saw on Dolly Parton in the magazines, only for a bright yellow to end up on your head. You begged your sister to let you stay at home, but she pointed to the door for you to face the consequences of getting hair dye without her permission.

And since then, you went back to your natural hair color, not touching a dye in your life again.

Steve won’t let you live it down, always bringing up the nickname he knows you hate so much.

Though you don’t know whether he gave you the name because of the yellow hair you once sported or because you love the band so much.

“Well, I wanna rent a movie,” you shrug as you play with the straw. “I figured you could recommend one to me. You know, since you work here and everything.”

He rolls his eyes, “just get The Breakfast Club and leave.”

You put your hand over your heart, feigning pain. “Are you trying to get rid of me, Lego head?”

He clenches his jaw harder than before, you can tell that he is trying his hardest not to roll his eyes.

“I watched that movie last week. I wanna watch something else now. Give me a few recommendations or I’ll speak to your manager,” you tease him.

He shakes his head, pinching the bridge of his nose as he walks around the counter, nodding his head at you to follow him.

“I wouldn’t put it past you.”

You follow him, sipping on your coffee as you look down at the way his jeans are hugging his ass.

“How about Teen Wolf?” He asks as he walks into the horror movie section, he reaches for the movie and turns back to you, gripping the shelf as he gives you a fake smile.

“Hmm,” you scrunch your nose up as you pretend to think. “No thanks, I got enough Teen Wolf in front of me.” You gesture to his hair and the chest hair that peeks from his unbuttoned shirt.

You try to not look at the scar around his neck, the vision of him being held down against the ground while the bats tried to bite chunks of flesh out of him still pains you and makes shivers run down your spine.

With a snort, he rolls his eyes and puts the tape back on the shelf.

“What do you want, horror, action, rom-com–”

“Do I look like I’d enjoy a shitty rom-com?”

“Right,” he mumbles, scratching the back of his neck as he looks you up and down. You actually do look like you’d enjoy a shitty rom-com. Besides the constant glare or the frown on your face, you actually look like a sweet and approachable girl – that’s where he was wrong. You are unapproachable, you always have been. You’re rough and you’re mean, you never bite your tongue and you don’t shy away from fights or arguments, that is something that caught him off guard the first time he talked to you. The pink skirt, the bow in your hair and the innocent look on your face was a disguise for the little devil that was hiding behind those pretty eyes.

Your looks still don’t match your personality. – Even now, after the horrifying things that you have been through only weeks back, you are still you. Still the same mean girl he always knew you to be.

There was a shift in your behavior after last summer, something had changed in your eyes, a sadness lingered in them, one that hasn’t been there before, he doesn’t know what happened, if you had gotten hurt or if you had lost something or someone, but even if, that clearly wasn’t enough for you to change either.

Nothing seems to change you.

You are just cold and unreachable in your emotions – for the most part.

“Alright then no rom-com,” he sighs.

He continues to offer you movies, ones that you keep saying no to. He can feel himself growing frustrated the longer you do this, knowing damn well that you aren’t here for a movie, especially not for tonight, you’re hanging out with Robin tonight.

Once you make it to the last aisle, Steve is officially fed up with you. He leans against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest while you innocently look at the movies in the thriller section. You are sipping on your drink, eyeing some tape that you just reached for. You put it back and sigh, pretending to be bored.

While Steve had been trying to be less harsh with you than he was weeks before, he can’t help but roll his eyes at you.

“Why are you here?” He grumbles. “We both know you don’t want to rent a movie.”

You turn your head, eying him up and down before you start making your way over to him.

“How would you know?”

“Because I know you,” he mumbles as he takes a step closer to you. “I know you’re here because you’re fucking bored.”

You smirk, tilting your head up as you look into his hazel eyes.

“Get a job and let me do mine,” he rolls his eyes and finally brushes past you, making his way back to the counter.

“I don’t need a job, I have enough money to do… uh.. well nothing for the rest of my life. Just like you, Harrington. Why don’t you take that hush money we were gifted with and get the hell out of here?” You ask, curiously as you follow him. “You could be relaxing, traveling through the country, staying in fancy hotels, taking out hot chicks.”

“How fun,” he snorts as he stops by the register. “You go do that, if that’s what a dream life looks to you. Or get a freaking boyfriend or something and stop getting on my goddamn nerves, Blondie.”

“Who would keep your life so entertaining if I got too busy with a boyfriend?” You ask. “You’d die of boredom.”

Steve picks up the pencil he dropped earlier, trying to ignore you as he continues working on his crossword but you don’t let him obviously. You place the drink you teased him with, in front of him and lift yourself up on the counter, making yourself comfortable next to him.

He rolls his eyes, looking up at you through his bangs to find you looking at him already, a smirk lingering on your lips. You’re close enough for him to smell the perfume on your skin, sweet and flowery, another misleading thing, you’re not sweet, not in any way.

“You really think you have that much of an impact in my life?” He asks. Like the bruises on your body don’t anger him, because he couldn’t help you when you were fighting for your own and someone else’s life. Like he didn’t hold your hand when your cold body was laying in the hospital bed. Like he didn’t pray for you to make it out alive.

You bite the insides of your cheeks, blinking as you continue to look into his eyes.

You nod. “I think you would miss me so much if I was gone.”

He glares into your eyes, taking deep breaths as he moves his tongue along his bottom lip.

How can you speak of such things when you almost lost your life? He wonders.

“Yeah, you would definitely miss me,” you smirk and reach for your drink, only to be stopped by him when he reaches for it first, smirking back at you as he brings it up to his lips, wrapping his lips around the straw – not caring that your lips have touched it first.

Your jaw drops a little, only a little, though enough for him to be amused by the shocked look on your face – that is rare.

He takes a sip of your coffee, humming. “Mhmm, Vanilla? How’d you know it was my favorite?”

You purse your lips, squinting your eyes at him.

“Don’t look at me like that. You’ll give me the wrong idea and make me think that you have a crush on me or something.”

What an idiot.

“You wish, Lego head.” You snort and jump off the counter, letting your face drop into your regular expression.

He chuckles, tilting his head at you. “Right, I forgot, you don’t have such a thing as feelings.”

You blink, cracking your knuckles as you meet his eyes again.

Yeah, you heard that before and it stung, really badly.

“Not when it comes to you.”

He crosses his arms over his chest, looking at you with a bored expression.

“I’m so wounded.”

Nothing you would say or do could ever hurt Steve Harrington.

Not even the cruelest words from you would hurt him.

Because you don’t have the power to hurt him.

You don’t have an impact in his life.

You wouldn’t leave a void in his life if you just disappeared – not like he would in yours if he were to disappear.. But he doesn’t need to know that.

He couldn’t care less about you, he surely wouldn’t care if you left this town like you should have a long time ago, he surely wouldn’t care if you had died that night. You would have been long forgotten by now, a faceless someone in his memories.

“Heidi or Summer or Kayla will surely patch those wounds,” you smirk as you walk towards the door. “Or are you still getting over Nancy… you know after she rejected you… again?”

He nods at you with a glare, clenching his jaw at the reminder.

You chuckle and turn around, you open the door and step out.

“Look both ways when you cross the street, Blondie!” He calls out to you. “You don’t wanna end up in the hospital again!”

You flip him off, rolling your eyes at his chuckle that you hear before the door closes behind you.

The afternoon sun is shining down on you, leaving a warm feeling on your skin, a smile pulls at your lips as you glance at the growing flowers next to trees.

The sky is blue, no cloud in sight to hide the sun, it’s quiet, peaceful – almost too peaceful.

This is how it should be, right?

The war that was fought in secret is over.

But, there is still one upon you.

You and the man you just walked away from.

Will you make it out alive this time?

Or will you be left more broken than before?

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#steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington angst #steve harrington series #steve harrington enemies to lovers #stranger things angst

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megalony · 3 months

Text

She's Going Down

This is an Eddie X Buck X reader imagine that I hope you will all like, feedback is always greatly appreciated.

Taglist: @lunaticspoem@sj-thefanthefan@hellsdragon@im-an-adult-ish@crazylittlethingg@allauraleigh@onceuponadetectivedemigod@ceres27@avyannadawn@sleepylunarwolf@coverupps@justagirlthatlovedtoread @musicistheway @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @luula @missdreamofendless @bradleybeachbabe @woderfulkawaii @amberpanda99 @daggersquadphantom @marvel-and-chicago-fan @angryknightstatesmantrash @minjix @lyjen @kmc1989 @itsmytimetoodream @noonenuts @hiireadstuff

911 Masterlist

Summary: When a little boy falls down a mine shaft, (Y/n) goes down to get him. But when she becomes stuck and in danger too, her boys do everything to get her back.

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I found him!"

(Y/n) flopped down onto her stomach, feeling the squelching mud soak into her jacket and slither up her exposed neck when she leaned closer. Her nose crinkled as she brought her gloved hand to her mouth and bit down on the end of her glove, ripping it off so she could dangle her arm down in the landmine.

Her knees pushed down into the mud that felt like quick sand trying to swallow her whole. The tip of her boots started to sink down and her armpits burned against the edge of the wood in front of her that she was leaning over.

"It's okay honey, take my hand." Her voice strained and her arm started to shake the further she tried to reach down.

Just a little further and she would grab him.

A few more inches down and the five year old would be close enough to take (Y/n)'s hand. She would pull him up out of the landmine and hand him back to his petrified parents.

"Come on," Her lips curved into a smile despite the wince that flashed across her face. (Y/n) pursed her lips and tried to keep smiling to reassure him.

He wasn't moving. He wasn't reaching his hand out. He needed to meet her halfway, (Y/n) couldn't lower herself down any more without falling and crashing down with him. She needed him to help her get him out of here.

"Please? That's it."

With a deep breath, (Y/n) shimmied further across the mud until her upper chest was tilted over the side, imbedded into the rotten wood framing the edges of the square mine hidden into the Earth. She could see how he had fallen. There was nothing around here to suggest there might be tunnels down in the field and a few bits of wet, rotting wood weren't enough to stop people from falling down here. It must have been very decrepid for a light weight child to break through like this.

(Y/n) tensed her knees and her thighs as much as she could, grunting as she swatted her hand out. She could feel his small hand skim the tops of her fingers but she couldn't quite grasp him yet.

"(Y/n), what are you doing?!" Evan's frantic voice carried over the field along with the bustling wind that swept through the field like the start of a tornado.

Her lips clamped together as she tried to ignore her partner and focus on the little boy. He didn't look too panicked considering the situation he was in. His face was void of any emotion, the only thing giving away his panic was each frantic, shallow breath that he took.

Her fingers skimmed his hand again and (Y/n) did her best to curl her fingers around the back of his tiny hand, envisioning Chris hanging beneath her, desperate to be saved.

Just as her hand found his, his other hand slipped from the rod of metal he had been clinging to so he didn't fall further down the rabbit hole. His hand was too slippery to hold on to. She couldn't tighten her hand quick enough and pull up before his fingers were slipping through her hold and he was falling.

"No!"

A violent scream burst past (Y/n)'s lips and she could feel her chest sliding forward against the mud that was dragging her down. Her boots scratched through the dirt and slimey, watery Earth she was laid in. Her body tilted down and started to go forwards but it wasn't enough to let her grab the little boy before he was tumbling down into the darkness.

The mine swallowed him up and vanished him from (Y/n)'s sight until all she had were his screams echoeing up to mingle with hers.

Hands clamped down around (Y/n)'s waist when her hands scrambled to press into the walls of the mine to stop herself following the boy down. Her fingers scraped through the mud and imbedded in the crumbling walls.

Evan's chest smashed down into the back of (Y/n)'s thighs, pressing her down into the mud like he was trying to make a cast of her body. His fingers punctured into her hips and scratched against her stomach to bind her against him and stop her from falling. His head whacked into her lower back while he smashed his knees into the dirt and pulled up before he started falling too.

He reeled himself up and dragged (Y/n) with him, letting her body propell backwards until her head banged into his shoulder and her weight fell onto his chest and pushed down into the mud on his back.

All the air crushed out of Evan's lungs and he laid gasping while he moved his trembling arms to bind around (Y/n)'s waist to reassure himself that she wasn't about to fall. He wasn't about to lose her.

"He fell."

Tremors rattled through (Y/n)'s body causing her to flail back and forth against Evan. She couldn't stop the tears that started to drench her face. She had been so close. An inch closer, a second faster, a better grip. Just a little difference and he would have been up in her arms already. He would have been safe and sound back in his mother's arms if (Y/n) acted a second faster.

"We'll get him out." Evan stayed laid out on his back for a few more seconds, unable to move until he heard the rest of the team heading their way.

If Evan had been a second later he would have watched his girlfriend disappear down into the depths of the Earth. A split second difference and he wouldn't of grabbed her in time to stop her from falling. Five seconds later and he wouldn't have even seen (Y/n) laid out in the mud, reaching for the little boy. And the team would have been stumped trying to find the boy and (Y/n).

(Y/n) turned her head to the right and pressed her face into the crook of Evan's neck until he felt her tears soaking into his skin.

"I… I nearly had him."

Opening her eyes, (Y/n) lifted her head from Eddie's shoulder and looked over when she noticed Bobby start to aim their way. She could feel Eddie's hand smoothing up and down her arm and his lips pressed to the back of her head as he sighed into her hair.

Waiting for everything to be set up felt like they were waiting for the world to end. And the longer they waited, the worse the weather was becoming. They needed to hurry before the little boy lost consciousness and his state deteriorated.

They didn't even know if he was okay down there.

"I think we're ready." Bobby stood in front of the team with his hands on his hips and his eyes doing a sweep over each of them, silently asking the question.

Who was going to go down?

"I'll do it." (Y/n) straightened up and smoothed her hands up and down her thighs to try and get rid of the adrenaline doing summersaults in her stomach. She wanted to be the one to go down and get him out. She had been so close earlier, she wasn't going to let him slip through her fingers again. She wouldn't fail him again. (Y/n) would go down into that mine shaft and get him back out again safely.

"No."

Her head turned to the left and her eyes narrowed in on Eddie. His expression was stoic with pursed lips and narrowed eyes that gave nothing away. "I'll go," was the only thing Eddie gave as an explanation.

"That's not your call and I'm smaller than you. I'm going down."

Eddie couldn't decide for her whether she chose to do this or not. It was (Y/n)'s decision and her mind was already made up. She wasn't sitting around, waiting for something to go wrong and for someone else to do the job she had failed the first time around.

Besides, (Y/n)'s frame was more petite than Eddie and Evan and even Hen. She would fit better down the new shaft they had dug up parallel to the one the boy had fallen down. She would be a better fit to get in a harness and squeeze down to find him. It would be too much of a tight fit for Eddie to go down and then connect the boy to his rope and winch them both up together.

"Are you sure?" When (Y/n) nodded, Bobby pointed over his shoulder as a signal for her to go and get ready.

(Y/n) could feel Eddie walking close behind her along with Bobby and Chimney hot on his tail. Her chest tightened and she held her breath when she felt Eddie's hand reach out and clamp down around her upper arm. His chest pressed up into her back and his lips hovered over her ear, breathing hot air down her neck that contrasted to the brisk chill in the air that made her shiver.

"If you can't get him for any reason or we need to pull you up, you listen. Alright?" There was something tense behind Eddie's strained voice but (Y/n) found herself nodding before she even understood what he was saying.

He didn't want her to fight them if the weather turned bad or their time was running out and (Y/n) couldn't reach the boy in time. They all knew how she would think, she would want to go against orders and do anything she could to save this boy just like the rest of them. But Eddie wouldn't risk losing one of his partners, not for anything. And he needed (Y/n) to promise him that she would listen.

Eddie pressed a light kiss against (Y/n)'s cheek before he moved to stand with Evan who was leaning over, looking at the new hole they had dug with the crane. But when Evan looked up and his eyes locked with Eddie, his shoulders slumped and his hands dropped from his hips.

"She's going down, isn't she?" Evan didn't need an answer. One look at his partner showed he was right.

The rain poured down around them and made the ground even more sloppy and unsafe than it had been this morning when they arrived. Evan could feel each droplet pouring down the back of his neck and trickling down his back making him twist and itch uncomfortably.

His fingers itched in his gloves that he pulled tighter to make it easier to move in them before he moved through the swamp of mud towards (Y/n).

Her doe eyes looked up at him but neither of them spoke.

(Y/n) watched Evan as he moved to take hold of the harness she had pulled over her shoulders. He gave it a sharp tug to make sure it was in place properly before he pulled it around her middle and clipped it into place. Once it was in place, Evan swiped the helmet from her head and replaced it with the hard hat he handed over.

(Y/n) clipped the circular hat over her head and wiggled it into place. She hated the straps on these hats, they cut into her throat and chin like a noose.

"Please be careful."

"I will, I promise." (Y/n) let a smile dance across her lips when Evan pressed his gloved hand beneath her chin and tilted her head up, pretending to check her helmet. She watched his eyes glance around before he leaned down and stole a quick kiss from her lips before his hands moved to her hips.

He turned them both around and walked close behind her, guiding her over to the winch where Bobby and Chimney were knelt down in the mud.

"Let us know when you find him and his condition before we pull you up. You don't have long down there with these conditions."

"Okay."

Evan took the clip from Chimney and attached it to (Y/n)'s harness, giving a sharp tug to make sure it was attached and not at risk of coming loose. The last thing they needed was for it to deattach and having to get someone else to go down for both (Y/n) and the boy.

When (Y/n) leaned over to look down the dark hole in the ground, she had a sudden urge to jump. The rain beat down against them all and pattered into the hole like an endless, open drum. The bright LED light set up over the hole didn't give a lot of light cast down, barely three feet of the ground were exposed before it went pitch black.

(Y/n) turned on the light on her helmet and slumped down to sit on the floor. The mud squelched beneath her and she could feel the blood leaving her stomach to fuel her head and her hands when she dangled her legs down into the gap.

"Let's go," She nodded over at Chimney and once he turned on the winch, (Y/n) leaned back and slowly let herself slide down.

Her stomach flew up to her throat when her legs dangled free and she felt all her weight fall down. The harness tightened around her thighs and her stomach and felt like it was pinching her lungs. It was like she was sat on a very odd, uncomfortable zipline that was going down instead of across. She didn't like the way her weight pooled around her stomach and the rope felt like it wasn't strong enough to hold her but (Y/n) tried to push those fears aside.

When she looked up, she could see both her boys leaning over, both wearing stern, tense expressions until the small torch on her helmet couldn't find their faces anymore.

(Y/n) kept one hand on the rope and briefly moved her other hand to the radio strapped to her left shoulder, just to make sure it was still there and ready for any emergency she might have.

Her feet pressed up against the mud in front of her but she made sure not to apply too much pressure. She didn't want her feet pushing through and creating a sink hole or crumble some of the walls in here. The tips of her boots pressed against the mud and started to move like she was walking to help lower herself down steady and safely.

Evan braced his hands on his knees and hunched forward as if looking deeper would let him see some angle of his girlfriend. All he could see was the rope disappearing out of sight, feeding the ground like a never-ending cycle.

His fingertips scratched through his trousers and his lower back arched out as he continued to look down. If he moved away from here he would only panic and there wasn't anything else he could do right now. Evan couldn't go and comfort the parents when he had no way of telling them everything was going to be alright. Especially not when he was worried because it was his girlfriend that had gone down to get their son out.

Sighing through gritted teeth, Eddie tilted his head back and narrowed his eyes up at the darkened sky.

They had quite a few lights set up near the house and all around the field and there was a huge LED light attached to the crane. It gave them ample light to see what was going on and so they could help (Y/n) if need be, but the weather wasn't doing them any favours.

The rain was making the mud worse and the whole field was becoming swamped in rivers. It made things unsafe for (Y/n), the ground was better when it was firm and dry and hard. And the thunder and lightning crackling through the sky was indicating a storm heading their way. They didn't have long before they would have to retreat and wait out the storm until it was safe to go back down again.

Eddie moved round and stood a foot behind Evan so he could slouch his shoulders up against the metal beams holding up the light fixtures. One arm folded over his chest but he reached his other arm out and tightly gripped Evan's shoulder. He smoothed his thumb across his neck and silently watched the panic roll through his boyfriend.

After a minute or so, Evan sighed and moved back. He was only going to panic everyone by hovering like a worried mother hen and he couldn't help. Bobby and Chimney were in charge of the winch and the construction manager was stood watching and waiting in case he needed to add any input.

Evan backed up a few paces until he was level with Eddie. He slumped to the right and let his head flop onto Eddie's shoulder. His feet sank into the mud and he slouched his legs down to lower his height to make it easier on his neck to lean into Eddie like this. He felt Eddie's hand move from his shoulder to curve around his waist and Evan's eyes fell closed when he felt his boyfriend's lips press against the top of his head.

"Okay, I'm down. Give me a few feet to move around." (Y/n) wiggled her body and shimmied around when her feet finally touched the floor and she could stand up straight instead of dangle down like a worm on a hook.

She held the rope and pulled it a little as they fed her enough so she could move around. It was safer to move while still being connected to the rope, just in case she needed to be dragged back out in an emergency or in case she fell when going across into the mine shaft.

(Y/n) made sure the rope was tucked under her right arm so she didn't trip on it before she moved to the hole broken through the muddy wall. Her nose crinkled and she coiled her arms into her chest as she climbed up and started to shuffle through the wall.

"Adam? Honey, can you hear me? I'm here to get you out."

She poked her head into the old mine shaft and took a quick sweep around but her heart dropped to her stomach when she looked down.

There he was.

There was more water in here than she expected. The rain had been collecting up for a while to have such a swamp down there with him. He was clinging to a broken, rotting piece of wood to keep him afloat. His chin was slumped on the wood along with both his arms, but he was conscious. His small head was tilted up towards her and his eyes were wide when they locked on her.

"I see him! I- I need another ten feet of rope, he's swamped in the water." (Y/n) flopped her legs over the edge and braced her hands on the wall. She had to go down at least five more feet to reach him and she needed rope to give her leeway to get down safely.

"(Y/n) be quick, the weather's turning up here."

"I'm trying." With a push, she slumped off the ledge and let herself dangle down once again as the rope started to go down. "Stay there Adam, I'm almost there."

When a ragged screech cut through the tunnel, (Y/n) lifted her head up and braced her hands on the wall.

"Fuck!"

The rope was getting caught on the roof of the bridging tunnel connecting both mine shafts together. If she let it keep getting caught it could crumble the tunnel or break the rope or get it imbedded in the mud and she and Adam would be well and truly stuck down here.

"Stop, that's enough." (Y/n) pressed her helmet into the wall and moved both hands back to the wall as she tried to think. "Sorry boys," She whispered quietly to herself before she reached down for the buckle.

Once it was unclipped from her harness, (Y/n) looked down as both hands held tight to the rope so she could work out where to drop herself down.

She took a very deep breath to inflate her lungs before she pushed back from the wall and let go of the rope. Her arms spread out and her eyes snapped closed as her stomach bolted into her mouth from the rush of falling. All the air swept up around her but as soon as her feet touched the water, her whole body went cold.

Freezing cold water enveloped around her body and dragged her down until she was trembling and jolting from side to side. Her arms frantically flapped around and she kicked her legs until her head broke through the surface.

Deep gasps clamoured past her wobbling, jittering lips and (Y/n) shook her head to rid her eyes of water. She had landed just behind Adam where she wanted to be so she didn't knock him or drag him into the depths with her.

"(Y/n)?! (Y/n) what the fuck did you just do?"

"(Y/n) what happened? Answer me!" Eddie's fingers pressed so tightly into his radio that the plastic started to creak beneath his grip and a slight crunch made him let go before he broke his only connection to her.

He pushed forward along with Evan who was already on his knees in the dirt, leaning as far into the hole as he could without risking himself falling.

Eddie felt bile rising in the back of his throat and he choked when Evan reached forward and grabbed the rope. He pulled it up with so much ease that Eddie almost cried. (Y/n) wasn't on the rope anymore. If Evan could pull it that like that, there was clearly no weight dangling on the end of the rope.

"(Y/n)?"

"The rope g-got stuck, I unbuckled for a minute. I've got Adam, he's conscious. We're coming back up to the tunnel now, it's okay."

"You shouldn't do that!" Evan all but screamed into the radio as he sank back on his heels and tried to take deep breaths. He tilted his head back until the back of his head bumped into Eddie's thigh.

He thought the rope had snapped. He thought she had dropped even further down into the shaft and they would lose her for good. Eddie had been telling himself he would have to gear up and go down after all. She needed to tell them what she was planning to do. She couldn't just take it into her own hands and frighten them like that.

"Up you go, honey. Grab the rope and get into that tunnel, I'm right behind you."

(Y/n) hoisted Adam up out of the water by his waist and held him as high as she could without sinking down below the surface. Her knees braced into the wall and she took deep breaths to keep her lungs inflated and herself afloat.

Once Adam reached up and grabbed the rope, she moved her hands to his legs and pushed him until he grabbed the ledge and wiggled into the tunnel.

The moment he was safe, (Y/n) curled both hands around the rope and pulled as hard as she could. She braced her feet on the wall and started to climb like she was absailing in the wrong direction. Her left hand dug into the tunnel and she let go of the rope, bashing her knees into the dirt as all her weight moved into her arms. Groans and harsh breaths wheezed past her lips until she was finally laid on her stomach in the tunnel.

She had him.

He was here with her and he was safe.

"Get back on the rope, we need to move you both now."

Her arm curled around Adam's waist and she tucked him deep into his side and crawled into the second tunnel the team had dug out. Her feet planted down on the floor and she gently stood Adam down on his feet. But when (Y/n) tilted her head back and looked up, another shiver rocked down her spine and her body started trembling in fear as well as frozen chills.

"Cap, this tunnel is too narrow…I'll have to send Adam up first." There wasn't enough space for (Y/n) to be winched up at the same time as Adam, they hadn't made this tunnel big enough.

"Quickly."

"Okay honey, hold onto this and the firemen will pull you up. Your mummy is waiting up there for you." (Y/n) strapped the spare harness tucked into her side around Adam and clipped the buckle onto his harness.

"And you?"

"I'll be right behind you. He's ready, pull him up." (Y/n) leaned her head and shoulders up against the wall and watched Adam slowly disappear like a package being delivered up to the Gods.

"Pass him 'ere." Eddie held his arms out and quickly picked Adam up once Chimney unbuckled him. He spun on his heels and treked through the mud towards Hen, the paramedics and Adam's parents. But when a clap of thunder broke out through the sky, Eddie shuddered and slumped forward.

He barely felt Hen take Adam from his arms before he was spinning around to look behind him when he could hear raised voices. His shoulders pulled inwards as tremors rattled through his system when lightning struck the sky and the weather shifted.

Eddie watched, helpless, as Chimney started to run with the rest of the crew and Bobby dragged Evan away just as the crane started to fall.

Shockwaves ran beneath the surface and the ground seemed to rupture and shift beneath them. Eddie's legs were taken from beneath him and he was pushed backwards until his back hit the dirt and his lungs stopped breathing and restarted themselves.

Evan braced his hands over his head and buried his face in his arms when he and Bobby stumbled to the ground that started to shudder and move beneath them. No air left his lips and his whole body jerked back and forth as his mind started to scream. He was going to be sucked into the mud. He was going to fall through the ground to the centre of the Earth. The ground was giving way beneath him.

He could hear the electricity sparking and combusting through the sky when the crane took out half of the electric lights they had set up around the field.

Eddie had never heard his partner scream like that.

He had never heard such a shrill, broken sound as what left Evan's lips in that moment and carried across the field over to where Eddie was laid, flat out and stunned into silence. He pushed himself forward, struggling for breath but his eyes focused in time to see Evan bolt across the hazardous field.

"(Y/n)!" Her name fell from Evan's lips in a tortured scream and his tone rose an octave the more he started to scream out her name. He slumped down to his knees, throwing the metal rods out the way that had previously held up the winch and the light fixture.

"(Y/n)! No, no (Y/n)!"

Evan dug his gloved hands as far into the soft, sloppy soil as he could and started to rake it up. He moved mountains of dirt either side of his knees and leaned forward, scrambling to dig and dig until he could burrow his way down into the Earth to find his girl. They had moved. They had let her go down there alone. They didn't give her any back up. They didn't get her up in time.

It was supposed to be the boy they risked losing down there, not (Y/n). She was Evan and Eddie's priority and at the end of the day, she was the team's biggest priority. They looked after each other before the people they served in the community. (Y/n) was more important to them, they had to protect her first and foremost.

No one had protected her this time.

"(Y/n)," Her name fell past Evan's lips in a broken sob and he brushed his eyes against his shoulder to try and clear his vision and focus himself on his task.

"Buck, Buck stop." Bobby reached down and tried to hold Evan by the shoulders but he was roughly shoved away.

"Get her out! Dig. Get her out she's stuck down there!"

"(Y/n)? (Y/n) can you hear me?" Eddie pressed his lips to the top of his radio and pressed the button until he could feel it crunching beneath his finger. His tongue darted out to run across his lips when they all waited but they got nothing in response. No crackle of the radio, no scream. No fists pounding the Earth showing she was still okay down there. Not even the sound of her breath. "Baby please…"

His hand dropped the radio and moved to tangle in his damp locks as he threw his head back and stared up at the starless, bleak sky that had done this to them.

What were they going to do?

"Buck, step away."

"Evan." Eddie crouched down in front of his partner and wrapped one arm around Evan's chest and the other around his back. He heaved him up, trying to ignore the sudden grip Evan had on his arm and push him when he fought to stay scrambling in the dirt.

"We need to get her out-"

"Baby we can't dig over a hundred feet into the ground by hand." Eddie pressed his lips to the top of Evan's head, letting his tears soak into his boyfriend's hair as he managed to flop Evan down onto the floor. He knelt down beside him, tightening his arms around him until Evan was squashed into his chest with his head on Eddie's shoulder. He panted and gasped into Eddie's shoulder, gripping his arm so tightly he was about to tear it off.

They couldn't dig that far down into the ground with their hands. They had to find another way to get down to (Y/n).

Eddie could barely feel each breath that passed through his lips, but he could feel himself shaking.

He shouldn't have let her go down. He should have insisted that he be the one to get on the harness and go into that stupid tunnel. He knew it was too dangerous to send her down but he let her go anyway.

What had he done?

"What do we do?" Eddie looked up at Bobby while he began to sway Evan back and forth to stop him from passing out. He was already in the middle of a panic attack and Eddie couldn't comfort Evan and try to keep his mind on (Y/n) at the same time.

"The crane is down… either we try and get someone down the original shaft if it isn't completely collapsed, or we find another way to dig the new one again."

"Get the winch back up and running and I'll go down and get her. We can't dig again, we don't know how much air she has down there." Eddie's voice came out muffled against Evan's hair but his eyes were focused on Evan. His partner was sat, suddenly silent as he stared at the ground that had effectively swallowed up their girlfriend.

Eddie would go back down the original tunnel, he didn't care if it was crumbling and close to collapse. He would go down and get their girlfriend back out. They couldn't waste time, no one knew if she was suffocating or if she had an air pocket keeping her safe.

Digging with shovels was going to take time to get as far down as they needed to reach (Y/n). A winch would be quicker and Eddie didn't care how unsafe it was, he would take that risk to find his girl.

"W-what if we can't find her?"

Evan tilted his head back and squinted at the rain pouring down his face and soaking into his eyes. He smushed his cheek into Eddie's shoulder but he hated the blood rising to the surface of Eddie's skin turning his neck and face burnt crimson. And he hated seeing the tears mingle in with the raindrops on Eddie's face.

"We will. We're not leaving her down there." He sounded so certain and sure and it calmed one of the many nerves in Evan's churning stomach.

But Evan still coiled Eddie's arm tighter to his chest and started to rock back and forth again. Because what if they didn't find her? What if she was lost down there? What if they found her too late and they couldn't revive her? Neither of them could live without (Y/n). They wouldn't be able to forgive themselves if they couldn't find her in time.

***

"I'm trapped down here!"

A broken sob left (Y/n)'s lips and she choked on air, coughing up blood, spit and flecks of dirt that were still coating her lips and tingling in her mouth.

"Boys. Boys, get me out," (Y/n) let her head fall to the right on a pile of crushed dirt and coiled her arms to her chest that hadn't stopped shaking since she fell back down into the water.

The dirt wrapped around her like a blanket, trying to soften her decent down into Hell as she waited for death to take her. She had tried moving back into the tunnel when she realised the shaft she was in was caving in on itself. She got halfway into the tunnel before a blast sent her flying down into the water in the original broken mine shaft. The only good thing had been the falling dirt. It clogged up the water and stopped her from drowning.

The water was still freezing cold. She could feel hypothermia setting into her bones that were trembling and her skin was now a very bad shade and shrunken and tight.

She didn't know what to do.

The other tunnel was completely blocked off and caved in. This one wasn't much better and every few seconds, the walls would shudder and more droplets of dirt and soil would fall down onto her. There was no where for (Y/n) to go, she couldn't climb up the walls like a spider, she wasn't connected to any rope or a winch to pull her up. And her radio didn't seem to be working.

She was cut off, trapped and felt like this was going to be her last moments on Earth. Her final moments weren't going to be spent with her boys.

That thought sent a guttural cry bubbling past (Y/n)'s lips and her arms cocooned tighter to her chest before she moved one hand up and clenched her radio again.

"Eddie… Evan… please! I'm still h-here."

"(Y/n)?!"

A gasp tumbled past her lips and she pushed herself to sit up in the mud bath she seemed to be trapped in. Her back ached and clicked into place and her hand tightened around the radio that she dragged to press it against her lips.

Did she hear that right? Was Eddie really talking to her? Or was this her mind trying to calm her down in her last moments?

"Eddie? Eddie, please, please get me out. Eddie?" She tilted her head back to look up but it was a sky of darkness surrounding her. (Y/n) couldn't tell whether the tunnel had been completely blocked off by the crumbling soil or if there were air pockets and streaks of light somewhere high above. All she could see was darkness with white spots from her eyes dancing above her.

But she had a bubble of air, for now. And static was crackling through the radio along with her partner's voice. They would know she was alive. If they heard her they would know to keep fighting and trying to get her out of here. They would know that she wasn't dead yet.

"(Y/n)… I- ell… pr- …now."

Broken fragments of a conversation crackled through the radio, but it was enough to lift (Y/n)'s spirits somewhat. He was saying her name. Either he had heard her and he knew she was alive, or he was trying to reach out to her and see if she could hear him. It didn't matter which because (Y/n) knew they were trying to find her.

"Eddie. Evan." Their names fell past her lips on a loop until the walls started to crumble.

Her shoulder hunched inwards, her hands clasped tightly around the radio that she pressed into her chest and her head tucked down. Her knees pulled up to her stomach when everything started to move and shake and a desperate, howling scream left (Y/n)'s lips when she moved.

Oh God, was she going to be buried alive?

***

"Get me down there. Now!" Eddie swiped the spare harness from the floor and bolted across to the original mine shaft. There was roughly five or six feet scraped away but with how easily they were able to start clearing it, the dirt was loose and the shaft wasn't fully closed in.

He wasn't waiting any longer for everyone to scrape and shovel away the dirt. He would get hooked up and go down now. Eddie would bash his feet into the dirt and winch down with a shovel and make a path as he went. It would be quicker and if he stood on the dirt and started to move and jump, he would surely fall down quicker than it took them to dig.

(Y/n) was alive down there. She had screamed. Eddie heard his name and a croaky version of Evan's name before she screamed. That was his girl and he had to get down to her now because something was happening to her.

He stumbled forward as he slung his legs through the harness loops and pulled them over his shoulders.

"Eddie not yet-"

"I'll dig my way down if I have to but I'm going now. She needs me."

Eddie dared to look away from Bobby and sneak a glance behind him at Evan. He had dropped his shovel the moment he heard (Y/n) scream their names and he was stood shaking his radio, hitting it and breaking it to try and speak to (Y/n). Eddie didn't want to leave Evan like this but they couldn't waste anymore time.

Just as Eddie reached down to grab the buckle and rope, he stumbled forward when he felt Evan grab his shoulders. His partner shook him so violently he almost went down on his knees and his neck snapped forward in pain. He could hear Evan shouting his name in his ear before Evan suddenly let go of him with a final shove and started to run.

"Buck- what the fuck-" Eddie waved his arms out at his sides and dropped the rope as he watched his partner run, skid and stumble through the sloppy mud at their feet.

Where was she going?

A horrid scream tore through the air and for a moment, Eddie wasn't sure who made the sound. But when he narrowed his eyes and looked into the distance, he realised it hadn't been Evan who screamed like he thought it might have been.

It was (Y/n).

Eddie pushed past Bobby, bashing his shoulder into his captain as he set off into a sprint after Evan.

There she was. Not trapped over a hundred feet down beneath the ground. Not drowning in rain water or choking beneath a pile of dirt. She was stood halfway across the field, screaming as much as her lungs would allow. The closer Eddie got, the more frantic he became. She was drenched. From head to foot, (Y/n) was lathered in water, dirt and flecks of pebbles and grass. Water was dripping from every inch of her skin and clothing.

She was stumbling. Her knees were barely keeping her upright and her arms were stretched out in front of her before she went down on her knees and flopped onto her stomach.

Rough wheezes and broken sounds left her lips and a horrible tremble was making her writhe around in the mud.

But she was here, and she was alive.

"Baby! Oh God- oh baby!" Evan crashed down into the dirt the moment he was close enough to reach out for her. His arms swooped down around her and he reeled her up until he could slump her against his chest. His fingertips dug into her waist and his other hand moved to cradle the back of her neck that was frozen stiff and as cold as the artic.

"Sweetheart- hey, hey it's okay. Look at me, hm? Come on,"

Eddie bashed his arm into Evan when he went down beside him in the mud. His hands reached out and cupped (Y/n)'s jittering face that felt like rubber from how cold and wet she was. He lifted her head up and leaned down to press their foreheads together. He didn't like the purple and blue tinge to her inner lips that were parted enough for her to start crying.

"I- I couldn't… I-"

"Shh, shh we've got you now. It's okay." He kissed her frozen lips that were barely able to move and he swiped his thumbs beneath her eyes, collecting up her tears that continued to fall. Eddie could feel tears flushing down his own face as he sniffed and tried to compose himself, but he couldn't.

"You're alright baby."

(Y/n) wasn't sure if Evan was telling her or if he was reassuring himself but either way, she relished in his voice. Both of their voices. Violent tremors racked through her body and she clung to Evan's arm, digging her nails through his florescent jacket while she pressed her forehead down into Eddie's chest.

They had her. Whatever they had been doing up here sent her breaking through another tunnel that led out into the lake. She had gotten out, she was safe and back in their arms again where she wanted to be for the rest of her life.

Eddie gently smoothed (Y/n)'s hair back behind her ears, wondering at what point she had taken off her helmet. He kissed the top of her head while Evan leaned over and tucked his face into her shoulder, both of them leaning closer into Eddie.

They had her back. They were all going to be okay.

#evan buckley x reader #eddie diaz x reader #evan buckley #evan buckley imagine #buck x reader #buck imagine #imagine #911 imagine #eddie diaz imagine #eddie x buck #buck x eddie #eddie x reader

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sp1cy-t0ss · 1 year

Text

Antares

https://archiveofourown.org/works/45534721

The first thing Nightwing hears upon regaining consciousness is ominous chanting. A man’s voice rings out over the rest, ranting about an Eternal King, infinite power, and -- oh boy -- sacrifices. He tunes it out to assess the situation.

He’s in an old warehouse. Robin’s here too, looking even more annoyed than Nightwing feels, and both of them have their hands and ankles bound in rope. His comm is on silent, just as he left it, like an idiot. The ranting man and his followers in matching robes are gathered around a ritual circle in the middle of the floor. Yeah, that tells him all he needs to know. They need to get out, now.

Unfortunately, that’s exactly when the leader finishes his speech and turns to them.

“So,” the man asks with a cruel smile. “Which of you ‘heroes’ will have the honor of bringing our Lord to this plane?”

“I will.” Robin’s voice is sharp, unyielding.

The man is obviously surprised to receive an actual answer to his taunt, but obliges. He pulls Robin away without another word.

“What?! No! Robin, you can’t--” Nightwing’s protest is cut off with a punch to the stomach from one of the robed lackeys.

“I have my reasons, Nightwing; it must be me.” Robin’s face reveals nothing, but he gives a subtle hand signal: I have a plan.

Nightwing forces himself to calm down. They’ll get out of this. He just has to trust his Robin. While everyone’s eyes are off him, he quietly works at the amateur knots.

The leader drags Robin into the circle without a fight. He raises a jeweled dagger, intentions clear...

But Robin is faster. He bites his own wrist, hard, and spits his blood into the circle. The runes light up in terrible Lazarus green, and Robin pushes himself upright with a malicious grin.

The lead cultist scrambles back from the circle and into a deep bow. The chanting stops as his minions follow suit. Robin continues to look far too smug for his situation. Nightwing feels a headache coming on somewhere under his renewed panic.

This is his plan?!

There’s a blinding flash of light. When the spots clear from Nightwing’s vision, the Eternal King is floating in the circle, mere feet from the bound Robin.

The Eternal King isn’t quite the grotesque horror he expected. Their body is a glittering black void, a sleek humanoid shadow with misty white hair and bright, bright eyes of toxic green. A cold fog rolls off of their body in waves.

“Antares,” the shadow rumbles, and Nightwing feels static thrum in his bones with the sound. The room is painfully cold, but the King doesn’t seem aggressive yet. Maybe they really can bargain their way out of this mess.

Robin doesn’t flinch. He looks the Eternal King right in the eyes, utterly fearless, and smirks. “Hello, Beloved.”

What?

The King stares silently, floating closer. For a long moment, no one moves. No one speaks.

“My lord, does the sacrifice please you?” The ringleader cuts in, standing up with a greedy gleam in his eyes.

Something in the air changes as the King turns toward the man. Something cold, electric, heavy under the skin. Nightwing suppresses a shiver as he works through the last of the rope.

“You d̵̢̛a̵̼̽ṙ̴͎e̵͙̐.”

The leader pales and falls to his knees. “My Lord, if this offering is insufficient, we have another--”

The King s̴̱̖̺̺̓͊̕̕ć̵͇͇͔̈r̴̥͐e̸̥̬͌̂̌̊a̴̭̔̓̀̔͘m̵̯͑̋͌͠s̵̗̤̻̭̍̿, a furious howl that blurs Nightwing’s vision and claws his ears. The sound is everywhere, driving him to his knees. Growing shadows seem to absorb his little brother just as Nightwing realizes he’s blacking out.

They’re falling, they’re falling someone help they’re screaming he’s screaming make it stop dead on impact blood and bones make it stop make it STOP--

When he comes back to himself, it’s quiet. Nightwing blinks tears from his eyes, gasping for frigid air that pierces his lungs like knives. The floor outside the circle is covered in blood splatter. The cultists have all been struck down, and many aren’t moving.

But he’s not looking at them.

Because the monster is coiled around Robin like a snake, eyes burning as it surveys the room. Robin seems unharmed for now, but he has to get his baby brother away from that thing.

He steps forward, and those endless green eyes lock onto him. It snarls at his approach, revealing multiple rows of teeth. Claws subtly tighten on Robin’s shoulders. Nightwing sinks into a combat stance, and the creature braces itself to leap.

Pure, animal instinct screams that Nightwing won’t survive this fight.. It doesn’t matter. He’ll give his all like he always has, and Robin can escape. The others will find a way to take it down. He just has to buy time.

“Dove, it’s alright.”

To Nightwing’s amazement, the creature freezes. It turns to look at Robin, warbling in apparent confusion before turning back to Nightwing with a hiss.

Robin grabs its face in both hands and forces it to look at him. “No. That’s Nightwing, remember? He will not harm us. I am safe. We are safe.” His voice is steady, soothing as he gently presses their foreheads together. A spark of awareness slowly returns to ‘Dove’s’ eyes.

“Come back to me.”

The monster sags in Robin’s grip, slowly folding in on itself until a nearly-human teen with snowy white hair is left floating gently in its place.

Robin smiles, gentle and shockingly warm. “There you are.”

‘Dove’ is shaking. Their eyes are locked on Robin, as though he’s the only thing in their universe. “Antares,” they breathe, before wrapping Robin in a tight hug.

Robin briefly looks to Dick, gesturing toward the cultists. He then returns his attention to the distraught being, resting his chin on their head and both hands on their back. The obvious dismissal makes Nightwing uneasy, but the kid has a point. They'll just have to check him for hypnosis or mind control back at the Cave.

Now that Nightwing is actually looking at the cultists, their injuries are horrific. Deep lacerations, stab wounds, frostbite, severed limbs...none of them seem likely to die with medical treatment, but every last one is maimed.

The ringleader is worst of all. His eyes are gouged out, and his hands ripped off and cauterized by the same unearthly frost that burns scattered marks into his skin. An unfamiliar symbol has been clawed into his chest.

Nightwing looks back to the circle, where Dove is quietly sobbing. Their face is tucked securely into Robin’s neck, and Nightwing hears whispers of I was scared and can’t lose you too.

This is the same person?

By the time the cultists are all secured and the police have been called, Dove seems to have calmed down. Time to play the diplomat. Again.

Damn, maybe Steph has a point about Eldest Daughter Syndrome.

“I, uh, hate to interrupt, but we should probably get out of here, yeah? GCPD will be here in a couple minutes,” he proposes with a friendly smile.

Dove wipes their eyes. “Right.” Then they look around the room and wince. “Uhm, sorry you? Had to see that? I...panicked. You’re okay though, right? Not hurt or anything?” The question is disarmingly earnest, and there’s nothing but concern in their eyes. Hm.

“Nah, not a scratch,” Nightwing dismisses. Then he remembers he’s apparently talking to a king. “Thank you for saving Robin, Your Highness,” he adds with a bow of his head.

“Nuh-uh, no titles. Gross.” The King makes a face, then smiles with renewed cheer. “Call me Phantom. He/him, ghost, and general pain in the ass, at your service!” He floats higher and punctuates his announcement with a midair flip. “You might as well know, since we’re gonna be seeing each other a lot now.”

Crap. “I’m afraid I don’t follow,” Nightwing ventures.

‘Phantom’ exchanges a meaningful look with Robin. Nightwing barely has time to register the mischief on both their faces before Robin pulls the being down into a kiss.

A deep kiss now. Really deep. Yeah, they’ve definitely forgotten he’s here.

When they finally separate, Robin looks quite satisfied. Phantom, however, sticks out a forked tongue and scrunches his face. “Blech, blood. What did you...” His eyes land on Robin’s still-bloody wrist, then the droplets still in the circle.

“You didn’t.” A grin creeps across his face. “You have me on soul speed dial and you still hijacked a whole-ass summoning!”

“Tt. I was making a point.” Robin crosses his arms.

Phantom cackles. “You are literally the most dramatic person I’ve ever met!” he crows.

Robin raises an eyebrow and gestures to the warehouse full of mangled cultists. Phantom opens his mouth to retort, but it’s at this point that Nightwing finally manages to pull his jaw off the floor and speak.

“Robin,” he says with deliberate calm. “What the fuck.”

And then they hear police sirens. Fantastic.

“Crap. Don’t worry, I got it!” Phantom declares as he rips a green hole in existence. Robin is unfazed, which is rapidly getting less and less surprising.

A woman in the corner stirs. Phantom makes a ‘one moment’ gesture before he stalks over and yanks her forward with a growl. “You’ve kept your tongue for a reason. Spread the word: Robin is mine.” (Robin stands taller, obviously pleased by that extremely concerning statement.) The woman nods frantically, and Phantom drops her to the ground.

Without further preamble, Phantom zips back over and shoves both vigilantes through the rip.

Just like that, they’re all in Damian’s bedroom. The two boys immediately sit together on the edge of the bed, while Dick remains standing. Dick doesn’t even know where to begin, so he can only give a helpless ‘why’ sort of gesture. Thankfully, Damian seems to take pity on him.

“Richard, this insufferable fool is my Beloved. His name is Danny, and he is seventeen.” Then he smirks. “You may refer to him as High King Phantom of the Infinite Realms; The Tyrant’s Bane, True Balance, Son Of Stars, Pride of Time, Death’s Chosen--”

The ghost groans dramatically, flopping across Damian’s lap like a wet noodle. “Oh my gawd, Dames, why would you tell him that?”

"It is very important that Richard recognizes your position and authority.” Damian says, not even trying to sound convincing.

Danny reaches up and pushes at Damian’s face. It brings to mind a pair of cats, especially with Damian doing his best to look annoyed instead of fond. “Betrayal! I want a divorce!”

That’s the last straw. Dick chokes on his own spit and has to thump his chest a few times to breathe right again. With monumental effort, he manages to wheeze out a strangled “Are you MaRriEd?!”

Danny tries to sputter out a reply, but Dick is distracted by Damian laughing. It’s a low, light sound, with no attempt made to disguise it.

“Of course not,” Damian says. He cards a hand through Danny’s hair, the other boy sighing contently and looking up at him with adoring neon eyes. “We've only courted for seven months now. It will be another three years before we wed.”

Dick is just. Gonna ignore that last bit. For his own sanity. “Wait, how did you keep a whole boyfriend secret for seven months? In this family?”

“Bribery.” “Threats.”

Yeah, that sounds about right. Babs and Duke probably know then.

“Cool, good to know. One more question.” Well, more like a billion, but he may as well start with an icebreaker before the inevitable interrogation. Besides, it’s a big brother's duty to embarrass his siblings. “Why Dove?”

Damian says nothing, but his deep blush is almost audible.

“Because I’m cute and fluffy!” Danny chirps.

“Hardly,” Damian scoffs. “It’s because you are raucously annoying and constantly crash into windows.”

Literally everything about this situation is baffling, but Danny looks so offended that Dick can’t help but laugh.

“You lying asshole!” Danny screeches.

Damian turns to Dick. “He attempted to use a grapple three times and broke eleven windows; four of them with his face. I have videos.” Danny gasps, the two start bickering, and Dick is left to his thoughts once more.

Even as the pair separate to point fingers and trade increasingly creative insults, their body language is completely relaxed. As much as Dick is panicking about a powerful undead monarch around their family, Damian is happy. He has been for months, now that Dick thinks about it. He’s been loosening up a little, leaving the manor more, and even mentioning a few new friends (though he refuses to use the word.)

Whoever or whatever Danny is, he’s been good for him.

“Well,” Dick cuts in, interrupting an inventive declaration about overripe cheese. “We’ll obviously need to talk about this. But for what it’s worth,” he smiles. “I’m happy for you, Baby Bat.”

With that said, Dick walks out of the bedroom. Danny gives him a grateful smile, and a quiet thank you, Richard can be heard as he closes the door behind him.

Dick walks away at a leisurely pace until he reaches the end of the hallway, where he promptly breaks into a sprint toward the Cave. Checking the Batcomputer to make sure Damian hasn’t noticed the planted bug yet, he turns on his comms. Unsurprisingly, the entire family is yelling and demanding answers.

Well, at least he won’t be the only one having a heart attack tonight.

#dp x dc #dead serious #they're 16 and 17 #danny says he wants a divorce at every mild inconvenience #danny has dozens of titles and damian has memorized every last one entirely to annoy him #they alternate between adorable cats and those heckling muppets #spice writes #dc x dp #danny x damian

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eddiesghxst · 5 months

Note

https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cz3vEYss15I/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== (SFW LINK!)

Okay but imagine Eddie having a secret talent for card tricks like this if he ever did this to me imma jump his bones on the spot 😔✋

Eddie: *shows card trick* impressed?

Still Eddie: …. Wait why are you looking at me like that? 😳

(Eddie screaming like a banshee in mere seconds after tackling him)

GOD HE WOULD, he so would oh my god, he’s such a nerd i hate him

————

he would be so confused when you’re immediately all over him, pawing at him and tugging at the jawstring of his sweats, pulling his soft dick out as you mouth at his neck.

“woah, princess. what’s your deal, huh?” you lean back to look at him as you languidly stroke his cock, nuzzling against his hand when he reaches up to push your hair back. you frown, because it’s stupid and you can’t believe fucking card tricks sent you into a goddamn heat.

“the… the cards.” you mumble.

eddie raises an eyebrow, “the cards?” and you groan, dropping your head to softly thump against his shoulder, “please don’t make me admit it, eds.” you grumble into his shirt.

you swipe your thumb over his tip, his cock now alert and slowly filling out with excitement from your touch, and eddie hisses, hips bucking up against your hand. he breathlessly chuckles, “i’m a little confused, babe.”

you roll your eyes, pulling back to look at him again, “the card tricks were hot, eddie.”

and eddie almost laughs, he almost does, but then your squeezing his cock and fuck— the cards go falling to the ground in a white flurry, scattering all across the living room floor just like eddie’s fucking brain.

and sure eddie might be annoyed that he has to pick up all those cards, and he’s gonna be even more pissed off when he counts the cards and realizes he’s lost a few of them to the void that is the space under his couch— but shit, he can’t seem to find a reason to care because now you’re sinking down to your knees— and jesus christ, eddie’s gonna learn more card tricks after this.

#he can shuffle my cards anytime #and i don’t mean the ones that come in a deck😮‍💨😩#<<< that made no sense BUT THE VISION IS THERE #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson #eddie x reader #eddie munson smut #drabble

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loveharlow · 7 months

Text

DANCING WITH YOUR GHOST

PAIRING‧₊˚ JJ Maybank x Fem!Reader

SYNOPSIS‧₊˚ [2.3k] After a violent run in with Rafe and his guys, the group of Pogues is left with one less member, leaving a void in the heart of a certain blonde

WARNING(S)‧₊˚ swearing, death/murder, mentions of blood, mild violence, mentions of hallucinating, grief, mentions of a funeral, general angst

PROMPT‧₊˚ " 'cause our love is a ghost that the others can't see, it's a danger."

A/N‧₊˚ part of my angstober event!

˗ˏˋ jj masterlist ˎˊ˗

YOU FELT THE PAIN BEFORE ANYTHING ELSE. You felt the pain in your abdomen before you felt the familiar warmth of JJ’s hands on your waist as he caught you before you hit the ground. You felt the blood coating the lower half of your body before you heard Kie’s earth-shattering scream. You heard yourself make a gurgling sound as a metallic, repulsive taste filled your mouth. You tried to speak, your big and pleading eyes drifting to your five friends above you. You couldn’t understand why they all looked so sad, so worried.

Their voices were like distant chatter in your ears, barely there. It sounded like they were underwater but you felt like you were the one drowning. Your vision was going in and out, the act of making out their faces getting harder by the second.

Kiara was crying hysterically, hands over her mouth as tears cascaded freely from her eyes. She looked like she was struggling to catch her breath between cries. John B looked dumbstruck, standing so still you questioned if he was even a living thing at that moment. Pope was clearly discomposed but there was an undertone of anger in his stance, tears in his eyes but his fists balled so tightly. Sarah sported a quivering lip, muttering what sounded like ‘sorry’ over and over.

JJ was closest to you, on his knees as you finally registered the feeling of his hands pressing on your torso. He was sobbing, talking a mile a minute and you had not even a small clue as to what he may have been saying.

The drama between Rafe, his crew, and your friends had come to a head tonight when the two groups came across one another in the woods — harsh words exchanged, insults thrown. It just kept escalating. You had a gut feeling something would go wrong.

Rafe threw the first punch, clocking John B in the jaw. Everything after was a blur — punches thrown, knuckles split, and then the cocking of a gun rang out. No one knew why none of you expected Rafe Cameron to pull out a gun.

And why no one expected him to use it.

All you could really recall was Topper, the loyal lap-dog he is, trying to calm the erratic blonde down as he waved the firearm recklessly. He failed, nevertheless, Rafe falling into a spiral while wielding the gun as if it was a toy.

Everyone flinched when it went off, ducking beneath their own arms.

You don't know exactly what happened or how it happened. You just knew that, suddenly, you were hot. You felt frozen in time and a fire seemed to spread from the center of your being and you felt everyone’s eyes turn to you. You caught Rafe’s eye, watching as Topper and Kelce pulled him away and the three of them disappeared into the thick of the woods.

When your mind had finally caught up to your body, only then did you realize the stray bullet had found its home in you. You went into a panic at the realization, attempting to sit up, only to be met with a harsh, burning pain that had you shrieking. Somehow, that pain cleared your senses — allowing you to hear the voices of your friends and see them clearly now. The downside being that you were now all too aware of your wound and the blood spilling from your mouth.

“Hey, hey, look at me,” It was JJ talking, your eyes slowly drifting towards him. “Don’t try to talk o-or move, okay? W-we’re gonna get an ambulance and you’re gonna be fine.” He spoke nervously, tears trailing down his chin. “You’re going to be fine.”

Unable to speak, you nodded unsteadily, trying to focus on breathing. Everything felt so hard to do, things that should've come naturally. Your whole body hurt and ached. Your airways felt congested and you had no way to clear them. Your hands were fisting the dirt in reaction to the searing pain you felt.

The blood pooling in your throat became too much at some point, you began to cough mercilessly, the crimson substance splattering from your lips, coating JJ’s shirt.

“No, no, no...” The blonde began to panic. “Sarah! Where’s the ambulance?!” He yelled, startling the petrified girl who clutched her phone in her hands.

“I don’t know, I-”

“You don’t know?!”

“I don’t know! There’s no service, no one is answering-” She panicked, shoulders stuck in an upwards position showing just how uncomfortable she was. A part of her felt guilty, as she always did for the actions of her brother.

“You didn’t think to say anything five minutes ago?!” Pope roared at her.

“We’re all scared, guys! Give her a break-” John B tried to defend.

“My girlfriend is bleeding out because of her psycho brother, John B! I don’t give a shit about how scared she is!” You were still hacking up blood clots as the group argued, doing nothing to remedy the situation. You felt like your chest was caving in on itself. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I'm trying.” JJ apologized, voice wavering under the self-imposed pressure to keep you alive.

“I got it! Someone answered- hi, hello?” Kie announced, still distraught but more level-headed as moments passed, allowing the fog in her mind to clear.

JJ cooed, trying to calm your coughing fit. “I can’t turn her on her side without taking my hands off of the wound but she’s coughing, guys, I don’t think she can breathe.” JJ rambled and ranted as Kie remained on the phone. “I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to do! Guys!” His voice then went underwater again and your vision clouded over once more.

You didn’t know if you were still regurgitating blood, you didn’t know anything. All you knew was that your eyelids were forcing themselves shut and the pain you once felt started to dissipate into nothing as everything fell behind a blanket of warmth and darkness.

You felt everything until you felt nothing.

By the time the ambulance had arrived, you'd gone still. Paler than anyone had ever seen you with blood coating every inch of your frame. The pogues had to hold JJ to let the EMT’s load your body onto the stretcher and into the truck.

Dead on arrival, was what they told the pogues. They'd managed to regain your pulse on the drive to the hospital but it was lost again just two minutes before you were barrelled the doors and handed off to the doctors.

Your friends were crowded into a far corner in the waiting room when the doctor came out, a solemn yet professional look plastered on the man’s face as he explained that there was nothing they could do, that you’d lost too much blood. It was quiet for a few beats, then Kiara broke down, Sarah following. John’s B face fell into his hands and Pope cried silently. JJ had stormed off, angry and heartbroken. He was emotional beyond belief and the only thing he could think as he marched out of the Kildare County Hospital was that he couldn’t be the one to face your parents knowing he couldn’t do anything to save their daughter.

YOUR FUNERAL ONLY MADE JJ ANGRIER. It was held not too long after you passed, only a couple weeks after the incident that had taken your life in the first place. Rafe went MIA but no one outside of the people there that night knew he was the one who’d killed you, anyway. Topper and Kelce’s lips were sealed and the pogues were too stuck in their own bubbles of grief to even want revenge against him just yet.

But that wasn’t why JJ stood with a stormy expression as a semi-circle was formed around your coffin. He was angry because none of this was what you would’ve wanted. There were dozens of people there — kids from school who never even knew you, local shop owners who’d only seen you a handful of times. Sure, they should be able to give their condolences but you wouldn’t have wanted them here, feeding your parents empty apologies and whispering about how ‘such a nice girl could’ve met such an untimely end’.

Needless to say, he didn’t stay long. Your mother and father had tried to talk to him, see how he was doing but it’d been weeks and he still couldn’t face them. In his mind, he’d failed to protect their child.

JJ’S ROOM AT THE CHATEAU WAS CROWDED AND STUFFY. He hadn’t left the space much in the last couple weeks and John B was beginning to worry. Through the locked door, he could hear JJ rewatching old videos of you both, listening to your voicemails on repeat, and he was fairly sure that the boy still texted your phone and looked through your social media. The accounts that your parents hadn't known about and taken down anyway. John B had to slide food under his door just to make sure he ate.

But what worried him the most were the late nights that he’d hear mumbling and realized at some point that JJ was talking to you, or at least what he thought was you.

It was close to midnight and JJ sat on his bed, a plate with a sandwich still sitting in front of his bedroom door. It was probably warm by now.

“You have to eat something.” The all too familiar voice of your ghost, or whatever it was, rang out in the staleness of JJ's room.

“I will.” He spoke. His face was red and raw from crying.

“You should probably shower, too.”

“I will.”

“You can’t go on like this, JJ-”

“I know that!” The blonde shouted. “You think I don’t know that, Y/N?” He scoffed, pushing himself up off of his bed harshly and pacing around the small space. He’d been 'talking to you' for the last couple of days now. His brain not allowing him to process your death properly, wanting you alive and back in his arms so badly that he’d started seeing you — hallucinating you. He was scared at first, then he was relieved but now he just wanted you to go away because he knew you weren’t real.

The shadow of you that appeared in the same corner of his room every night was not you. It was the memory of you that his mind had conjured up. You looked like a person, like yourself. You looked so real, like if he reached his hand out to touch you he'd feel skin but he wouldn't. He tried the first time you appeared. He didn't care that you looked exactly the same way you did the night you died, blood stains and all. It sounded like you and looked like you. It talked like you, it made the same facial expressions as you and at first that was enough. But he knew that it wasn’t you.

“I’m not trying to upset you.”

JJ ran his hands down his face. “Why can’t you just go away?” He asked despondently. He didn’t know if he meant it. Sometimes, your phantom presence could be comforting. Other times, it was just another haunting realization of the fact that he’d never be able to hold you again. “You make me feel like I’m losing my mind. I already let you die and I have to live with that. Do I have to live with your ghost lingering in the corner of my room now, too?”

“You didn’t let me die.”

“I did.”

“No, you didn’t, JJ. I was shot. You did everything you could.”

“I didn’t do enough-” He claimed angrily.

“You did your best. You all did your best-”

“Then my best was not enough! We didn’t do enough!” He yelled, kicking the plate with the uneaten sandwich against the wall, watching as the plate shattered. He was breathing heavily as he fell to his knees, sliding against the wall. “Two minutes…” He mumbled. “All you had to do was hold on for two more minutes and they could’ve saved you.”

“You don't know that. I was in pain, JJ.” He hated how unreal your voice sounded. It was yours, the pitch and all, but it echoed and reverberated through the room as if you were in a chapel. “I was dead the minute that bullet went through me. Those were two minutes I never had.”

“You don’t know that.” He sobbed, curling up on himself. “I needed you. I still need you. And you left me.”

“I’m sorry. I didn't want to.”

“You're always sorry- will you stop apologizing?!” He shouted tearfully. “It’s not your fault.”

“But you blame me.”

“I blame myself. I don’t blame you, I could never blame you.”

“But you said-”

“I know what I said! But I don’t know what I’m saying, okay?!” He bellowed. “Please, please, just go away. I want to be alone. So, go away.” When he was met with no ghost-like response, he looked up to find your corner of his room empty. He let his head fall to his knees, his arms wrapped around them.

He sat like that, crying into his own arms until he fell asleep.

“YOU CAN’T KEEP DOING THIS!” John B’s voice bellowed in the living room of The Chateau as he trailed behind JJ who’d come out of hiding. The shaggy-haired boy hadn’t gotten any real sleep with JJ incessantly arguing with your ghost every night. He understood his friend was grieving but clearly his gentle approach was only encouraging his best friend’s delusions.

“What do you want me to do?” JJ barked back, the two boys now inches apart but still speaking at boisterous volumes.

JJ was well aware that John B knew of his odd and off-putting coping mechanism. He felt bad that his friend, more like brother, had to endure his grief on top of his own. He truly did. Everyone was still grieving you in their own way.

Kie had created a memorial table for you at The Wreck with her father's permission, a table that guest would never sit or eat at. Purely there to collect gifts and memorabilia.

Pope has become hyper-focused on repairing his academic profile, knowing you wanted nothing more than for him to gain back the scholarships he'd lost over the summer. You were his motivation.

Sarah had been distant. She felt partially guilty for what happened, despite the constant reassurance that she and Rafe were two different people. She visited your grave the most, a product of her deep-rooted guilt.

John B had carved your initials into the tree in his backyard, along with the signature 'P4L' to end it off. He'd even moved everything you'd ever left at his house - sweaters, blankets, socks, into the room where he kept all of his father's things. He figured you could both rest in peace together. Big John did always like you.

So, JJ was truly sorry that he couldn't pull himself together but he figured John B would be more understanding. He didn't know that John B had been as understanding as possible.

“You’re feeding into it! I get that you’re grieving, okay? But this has gone too far, man.”

“You don’t get it.”

“No, JJ, you don’t get it. She’s gone. She’s been gone.”

That struck a hard nerve in JJ. He knew you were gone. But he didn't like to hear it. He hated every variation of it. Gone. Passed Away. Dead. Deceased. Resting. He hated them all.

“Shut up.” JJ gritted through his teeth, but tears were brimming in his eyes.

“She’s dead. She’s been dead for almost two months-”

“Shut up!” The blonde yelled, pinning the brunette to the nearest wall. John B knew this was probably good for him, so he put up no fight.

In JJ's mind, John B just didn't get it and he never would. JJ loved your ghostly presence when he was crying so hard that he couldn't breathe and your voice would ring out, reminding him that you loved him and that you'd see again some day. But he didn't like it so much when that same voice was encouraging him to get up and take care of himself, or reminding him that the day he pulled himself together was when you would be gone for good, ghost and all. Because then he wouldn't need you anymore.

“You need to let her go.” Was the last thing John B said before JJ stared him down like a sad but feral dog. It was seconds that felt like minutes then the blonde released his friend and stormed back into his room, slamming the door behind himself.

He was sick of John B. He was sick of everyone. JJ knew he wasn’t grieving well but he didn’t know how he was supposed to.

He didn’t want to visit your grave, declining when the rest of the pogues extended the invite. They went weekly, replacing the flowers and plush animals each time.

He didn’t want to face your parents who’d been requesting his presence at the house he’d frequented plenty of times.

He didn't want to go to school. The pitiful looks he'd receive from classmates who previously saw him as nothing but trouble. Your locker had been bombarded with cards, stuffed animals, and pictures. God, he hated the pictures. They were all pictures of you with other people, usually the person who hung them up. 'Hey, look! I was sort of friends with the dead girl!' To him it was all false grief, people using your death as some kind of sick icebreaker.

'Did you hear about what happened to that girl? It's so sad.'

'She was so young. It could've been any one of us, y'know?'

He'd burn that locker to ashes if he could.

But the final crack in the glass came when he laid himself out on his bed, still heated and furious, typing out a text message to you about how much of an asshole John B was. Unexpectedly, when he pressed send on this message...

The bubble turned green.

It was a harsh realization, the boy freezing in place for a moment and before he knew it, JJ hurled his phone at the wall. Conveniently, in the same corner you always appeared in.

Through his rage, however, he noticed something on the floor in the corner that he hadn't before in all the times he'd conversed with you. Swiftly walking towards it and snatching up the object, he was brought down from his anger when he realized it was a photo of you and him that he thought he'd lost months ago. He'd planned to frame it but never got around to doing so.

It had him balling violently in seconds, John B coming in hesitantly at the sound of his borderline horrific cries and rubbing his best friends back as he sobbed, clutching the photo to his chest.

You were gone.

And he had to let you go. He didn't know how to and he didn't want to. But he knew he had to.

General taglist; @livlaughquinn

JJ Maybank Taglist; @ronnieissupermegafoxyawesomehot @maybankslover

Event Taglist; @timmytime17

feedback is appreciated! thanks for reading.

©loveharlow

#Spotify #angstober23'#jj maybank x you #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank #obx jj #jj maybank x reader #jj mayback imagine #jj mayback x reader #rudy pankow x reader #rudy outer banks #rudy pankow #jj maybank smut #obx jj x reader #obx netflix #obx

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vermilionpearls · 1 year

Text

❤️‍🔥 PAC: Dirty (+18) and sexual letter from your future spouse❤️‍🔥

This PAC includes their explicit letter, a song, and a quote.

I swear to God that if you are not of age and you read this, your guides will bother you and give such headache that you will have to take a nap that lasts, at least, 4 hours.

@vermilionpearls is @pearl-tarotist NSFT (+18) blog!

“Lean in to kiss me in all the places where the ache is the most special.” ( Sanober Khan)

PILE 1

(5oC -10oP – Page of Cups – Page of Swords – 4oC – 5oW – The Lovers)

“I hate to see you with someone else. It pains me to see you with others and I hate even more that you are willing to put your attention on them. You make me so jealous and mad; I hate your indifference and I just want to make you mine. I want to mark you and make you realize you are mine.

I hate the fact that we are away from each other and that I must conform myself just to the thought of you. And when I think about you, my future partner, my wife… I am just able to picture you with others at your feet, trying to worship you when it should be MY position. I am willing to fight anybody to make you mine and I want to be the only one loving you. I want to touch, caress, and lick the soft meat of your legs. I want to walk my fingers over your skin and see the goosebumps forming on your body. I want your legs to shake and to be unable to move. I want them around my body, and I want your weight on top of me, tired, restless and at my mercy. I want to take care of you.

I touch myself at the thought of you, even if I don’t know you yet, I can imagine all the things I want to do to you. I can imagine your moans and raspy breaths, the warmness of your tongue on my tip and the strength of my hands in between your hair. I want to be the only one to see you like that. And I want to grab your ass and spank it once for every time you let any other man touch you. The image of it just makes my movements faster, I want to orgasm at the thought of you. When you will be mine, you won’t be able to return to anybody else. Your pleasure will become mine too.

And I swear that I will be so good to you, I will get down on my knees and I will make your mind go blind and void, and I will make your eyes roll until you faint while I am tasting and enjoying your wetness. All your attention will be on me.

Think of me when you touch yourself too. Do not let other see you in the way I will see you. Hide your face from them, cause if I know they can see you in that way: eyes closed, cheeks red and mouth open I will go crazy. They are not worthy of you. It just makes me so mad that I have to bite my lips not to scream and moan. I have to be the only one to see that expression of your face. I am the only one that can cum at the thought of you and to the thought of your face.

I want the cum that falls in my hands to fall in your face and lips, that's the only thought I can cum to.

God, why did you have to be so pretty?".

"Hate to sound sleazy,but tease me,I don't want it if it's that easy" (Tupac Shakur).

PILE 2

(8oP – Page of Cups – The Empress – 8oC – 4oS – The Lovers – 9oP – 6oC )

“My love,

The mere thought of you dominates me, but it seems that I am a no one to you. No matter where I go or what I am doing your energy and aura cannot leave me alone. You are always on my mind, in the most dark and hidden corner. You burn me to frustration. I have so many fantasies of you and of what I want to do to you that I am unable to express them … You do not give me the chance to do so, and your indifference just makes me want to chase you even more. Stop blocking our relationship or the messages that I am sending you. You dominate me, my thoughts, and actions. But it’s not the same for you. Stop paying attention to others.

(It is possible that he has tried to reach you, but you are blocking him, I don’t know if mentally or physically…).

Every time I see you or think about you, I must fix up my pants because my dick starts throbbing and twisting without control. It makes things so complicated, having to hide the effect you have on me to others. Do you enjoy the power you have over me? I cannot tell as you do not dare to look at me.

But I look at you… And you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. You are independent, abundant, beautiful, clever and Jesus!... You have such a beautiful body. Your curves drive me crazy, and I just cannot stop looking at you and that chest of yours…round and heavy in my hands. I want to bite and suck your nipples while you close your eyes and enjoy the sensation. Your own body is an invitation to enjoyment.

But you always hold that expression of your face as if you were better than me, you make me feel so dangerous, as if I was the one causing all our feelings, as if I was a wolf chasing you… Why do you feel so much shyness? Why are you acting so innocent, little angel? I know you want me to make you surrender. We both know that this is a fake act. You want me to beg because it feels good to you, you want me to cry for your consent. You feel powerful when you make me go dumb and irrational.

You love it when I tell you I want you to touch me and that I want to touch you, you act all shy but the wetness between your legs cannot lie. No matter how much you want to hide it, you always end up with the taste of my fingers in your mouth… You like it when I push your limits. And those eyes of yours are so angelic and at the same time so dirty that they make me want to push you even more. I cannot wait to fuck you and see how your boobs move when I thrust into you. I swear to God that your body is so hypnotic that when I focus on it I feel like dying, I could cum in seconds, you make me so horny and needy it’s embarrassing. You feel so good and warm… There’s no better place in this Earth than inside of you.

I can not wait to treat you as you deserve, as a queen. Please let me show you how good I am, I have been working hard to become the emperor and the man that you need and deserve. I can not wait to fight with you for the throne that we both want, that would make you put your attention on me, right?

Always yours, (their name)”.

+ Stuff: they really love your bobs! (No matter if they are small, big... They do not care). – They felt really offended at first when you did not care about their first approaches to you. – They really think you are the most beautiful and powerful woman ever.

"Anyone who is observant, who discovers the person they have always dreamed of, knows that sexual energy comes into play before sex even takes place. The greatest pleasure isn't sex, but the passion with which it is practiced. When the passion is intense, then sex joins in to complete the dance, but it is never the principal aim." (Paulo Coelho).

PILE 3

(Page of Cups – Knight of Wands – The High Priestess – the Hanged man – 10 of Cups – Ace of Swords)

“Finally! It made a lot of time that I wanted to communicate with you, I was getting so stressed and worried, darling! Thanks for coming to me. The first thing I want to do when I meet you is embracing you and finally feeling your whole body, your complete self. I know you are going to be perfect in my embrace.

At first, I will want to take you far away from everybody, I would like it to be just you and me. And I want it to be such a pleasuring trip, I want the best for you, honestly. You make me feel so soft and safe that I just want the same for you and the only way I know how to do it is by kissing you shoulders and back lovingly and slowly. I want things to be slow and deep, I want you to realize how much I love you and how much I desire you and respect you. You are like an ancient masterpiece that I have to take care of with and endless amount of patience and dedication.

I will make love to you. I will focus only on you and I will lick and press all the right places and zones. I want to hug you while I am fucking you, kissing you and twisting your nipples. I want to press and push your clit so softly and delicately that you will feel overwhelmed with my love.

I swear I will make that trip so pleasuring to you. I won’t stop touching you, no matter if others can see… I will fuck you and caress you until you are tired, sleepy, and satisfied between my arms. I will even stop on the side of the road if that’s what your body is asking of me.

Ultimately, I will focus so much on you and in your beauty; on how much you seem to understand and balance me that I will just find myself upside down. As if my whole world had just changed due to your presence. I will always look at you and those pretty legs of yours. I will make myself upside down so I can just get a better look at you, at your whole figure and at your most sensitive spot. I don’t care if it will change my attitude as it is possible that it is for the best. You will make so malleable that it is shameful; it’s shameful how little I will care.

You could tie me up to the bed, use me, play with me and I would still love it because it is you. I love to hear all your dirty ideas and words, it made me feel like a young boy again, your love makes me feel rejuvenate. The love and the emotional fulfillment when we are one is the beginning of a new era for me and there’s no words to describe how that makes me feel.

Thank you for appearing in my life, I love you a lot”.

+Stuff: there was a nickname that appeared so quick! But I don’t think it was for everyone, so I did not include it in the letter and it was: “my little wild flower”. – Not just that but this group is fond of nicknames…darling, babe, honey… - The majority of girls is going to have black or brunette hair… that’s something that is going to be really attractive to your fs. – This letter is not as explicit as others because your fs wanted to focus on the emotional side and how much they love you and want to make you feel good.

"What's a fuck when what I want is love?" (Henry Miller).

#tarot pac #tarotblr #pac #nsft tarot #free tarot #future spouse tarot #love tarot #pap #pick a pile #pick a picture #spotify #Spotify

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intynidad · 11 months

Note

The cult leader yan fic is so @#*")-/_+&-?! I can't explain it but *eats fic from how good it is*

Also, I would like to know what does the deity think about the influx of followers, but not for him but for them?

-teacher anon (am I really an anon if I don't ask anonymously LMAO anyways)

I hope my fix tasted well lol

I’m glad you like it so much! Welcome teacher anon!! Also have anyone play cult of the lamb? Because this is inspire by it lol

Yandere cult x cult leaver reader x yandere deity pt2

You sink to your knees, your hands clasped in prayer, as your consciousness begins to drift away, transcending to the ethereal realm of your master.

In the depths of this mystical connection, a resounding voice booms around you, its source elusive yet all-encompassing. It speaks with a commanding presence, echoing from every corner of your being, as if the very fabric of existence is alive with its words.

"Little lamb..." the voice reverberates, its power resonating through your core, drawing you deeper into its enigmatic embrace.

“Master, may I speak freely?” You said still looking into the ground

“You may, my little priest…” Only when your master gives you permission do you dare to rise from your feet, no longer in you cabin but in a dark void where you feel the very fabric of darkness crawls and grabbing your body, not in a malicious way but in a way of making sure you don’t fall.

“You did what I asked you…?”your master say with difficulty

“Yes master, your flock is growing and many people have done the oath in your name”

“Yet they do not follow me” your master booming voice rise in volume

You get to your Knees again and put your hands together.

“They are-are just mindless lambs that do not understand the magnificent of your presence my lord, give them some time and they shall learn” you say not fearing for your life, yet for the ones of YOUR followers

You felt an invisible hand take your cheek delicately

“Make them understand, little lamb and i shall reward you with pleasures and salvation that your human mind cannot comprehend yet”

And with a movement of the same hand you were gone,back into your cavin with a small tear falling down your face.

Meanwhile, in the ethereal realms of your master, a powerful figure gazes upon the chains that bind their form. The once unyielding iron seems to have weakened, but its grip remains firm and unyielding. Despite the exertion and relentless struggle, every attempt to break free is met with the unrelenting resistance of the chains that hold them in place.

However, your master is a patient and tenacious being, having endured the weight of captivity for what feels like an eternity. The longing for freedom courses through their veins, fueling their determination and resolve. They refuse to surrender, even in the face of imminent liberation. The shackles may hold them for now, but the spirit of liberation burns brightly within, ready to seize the moment when the chains finally yield.

When he amasses a multitude of devoted followers and receives the offerings and sacrifices needed, the barriers separating the mortal realm and his ethereal existence will weaken. With each loyal disciple and every sacrificial act, his power grows, edging closer to the coveted goal of manifesting in a tangible form. The anticipation of that transformative moment fills him with an intoxicating mix of anticipation for when he finally gains a physical presence in the mortal realm, he will unleash his divine influence upon the world…

And claim you as his rightful spouse, he dreams of the day he might finally claim you and hear you scream but not from pain but from the pleasure he is planning to give you.

Once he get a physical form he will not let you go,his little lamb

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jooeyoo · 1 year

Text

Full parts: Until death do us part

Pairing: Douma x femReader

Tags: mentions of blood, self mutilation, manipulation, kidnapping, obsession, gore, douma himself bffr.

Summary: He kidnaps you after finding you wounded, and keeps you around for his own amusement-until you can’t take it anymore.

“I told you, you weren’t going to leave. Ever”

Her breath hitched as she ran through the ruins of a town she once called home. It was unrecognizable, a distant memory that would still escape her as she grew older, a reminder not all things last. A reminder of life’s misery. The hem of her kimono ripped as she ran as fast as she could, her legs beginning to sore, her heartbeat irregular, the tears in her eyes clouding her vision through the tall ivory flames into the night sky. The heat of the air radiated onto every living creature, the smoke was intoxicating and caused her to suddenly stop as she grew victim to a coughing fit. Her lashes flickered, and shot wide at the sight of the blood all over her hands, and down her chest. That’s right...I had been..impaled

Her knees grew weak as she fell to the hard ground, the pain coming back to her now as she held onto the gaping wound. She spat as a pool of blood leaking out from the depths of her gut- she stared in horror. I’m going to die...I’m going to die in this god forsaken place

Her vision began to falter once more, blurred by the smoke and the antagonising feeling of pain in her stomach. Fatigue slowly began to creep onto her body, as the unavoidable darkness of the void crept into her vision of sight. Her limbs no longer felt her own.

All dreams and aspirations she had, gone

All the memories, pain, and happiness she had endured, had been reducing to nothing- to ash in just mere hours.

Everyone she knew..who had even survived..?

Did it really matter, she was going to die herself. She thought she was at peace with the idea of death, at peace with the idea that the world is never ending, never stopping, constantly evolving yet she couldn’t deny the pit that formed in her stomach. It was so much more uncomfortable than the pain she had now grown accustomed to. Her eyes shot back open, the pupils much more dilated- they shook at the very idea of dying. Where would she go? Would a God punish her for her sins, for her mistakes? Or embrace her, and tell her she did well? Or was there nothing at all, a void devoid of any joy or misery- simply nothingness. A place where no gods, or angels roamed- but only the darkness. Darkness

Her head snapped back behind her. The city had grown quiet, no screaming or yelling could be heard- no clanking of swords. Had the fight ended? Had those people succeeded in killing that monster? Or had it..won?

The question itself made her tremble with terror, she forced herself to her feet. She wouldn’t die like this- she wouldn’t allow it. But regardless of what she wanted, within mere moments of standing- she fell back down to her knees. Another pool of blood escaped her mouth, staining her lips.

I am going to die here

Her vision began to blur, as her head hit the ground.

At-least, I’d die with dignity

Her vision became black, her mind no longer conscious.

“Oh,..oh my” A cheerful tone crept up behind the girls unconscious body. The man’s looming presence shadowed over her, he held a human leg in one of his hands- his mouth stained with blood.

“It seems a lost little lamb escaped from the hoard..” The man tutted, a wide grin on his face that was supposed to mirror a friendly smile. “Though.” His voice suddenly became cold, blank, devoid of any emotion. He let the leg fall to the floor, with a thud. He leaned down to the girl, inspecting her face, and the wound in her stomach. “You’re almost dead.” The smile on his face, had evaporated within seconds- as did his cheerful tone. He tilted his head to the side, pondering.

“How did you..run all the way out here..with a wound like that..and with a small, weak..body like that..” The man slowly pulled a strand of hair away from the girls face, revealing his long nails. “How sad..for a girl like you to slowly die like this...such a beautiful face gone to waste as well! How despicable of my comrades!” He hummed with glee, that friendly face returning to the surface. Oh, how he could just eat her all up!

Though, he was full right now..but he couldn’t let her go to waste! Not such beauty, no! How cruel he’d be to let such a girl die in such a way, he’d only allow her to be devoured by him, savoured him, saved by him!

What to do? He tapped his head before a teethy grin emerged.

What would be so wrong, about a souvenir?

YN awoke with a gaping feeling in her stomach, as she looked down- she was met with bandages that had been carefully placed. Her mind was still foggy, her vision barely stable. Her throat felt dry, and sore. If she had died, this was certainly no better. She quickly stood to her feet, to inspect her new surroundings.

“Hello..?” She noticed she was no longer in the entertainment district but a room devoid of any actual furniture, apart from the futon she had awoken on,

- but decorated with various artworks of locus’s.

“Oh, you poor thing.” She jumped at the sudden voice that had appeared behind her.

A voice ridden with amicability and cheerfulness but there was also a hint of pity. As she turned, she felt her eyes grow wider as a enormous glooming presence struck her in very core. She was met with a man, who towered over her, with eyes like rainbows and platinum blonde hair. His hand slowly reached her shoulder, purple nails slightly digging into her shoulder- his grip was firm, but not painful- but it was freezing cold. It sent shivers down her spine.

“You awoke so quickly! I expected you to be out for longer..”

His smile grew wider as it hit her.

“..You’re..you’re a demon!” Fear struck her core, as she took a step back away from him, trying to balance her footing.

“Oh dear! You caught me!” Before she could even reply, a frightening whiff of wind passed her, as he stood now behind her once again. His body still, pressed against hers, his head peered down into the crane of her neck. “Afraid? That I’ll gobble you up? Or maybe I’ll toy with your body first! Tear it limb..from limb..” The amicability in his voice remained, yet his eyes had grown wider and more erratic. His smile seemed more creepy now, than it did friendly. YN stood still, paralysed like a deer looking into headlights, into death. Her body was frozen to the core until a pair of sharp teeth grazed just the surface of her neck which caused her to suddenly turn around.

“Why haven’t you..?”

The man paused for a moment, pondering in thought. His smile never faded.

“It’s better to savour ones food, don’t you think so? To relinquish one’s desire to simply savour it more..to appreciate the beauty in all things living, first.” He hummed.

An innate sense of danger filled her to her core

He’s a madman

“The beauty..of all thing’s living..? You mean you’re just going to toy with me until you’ve had your fun? You’re sick!” She spat out- until she realised the words she said, her eyes briefly widening in shock.

The demon stood there, for a moment he felt like laughing. “I didn’t think you’d be so resilient.. you..seemed so weak and frale! Oh how cute! I must have hit the jackpot!” His charismatic and cheerful aura beamed throughout the room clashing with YN’s who beamed of disgust.

“You mean to say..you’re not going to kill me..?” Her voice grew meek, quiet, confused, disgusted.

“Oh not yet! Anymore, atleast! You seem fun! I’m so bored these days, you see.” His voice peered to the side, as he looked her up and down causing her to take another step back. In retort, a small laugh escaped his mouth as he covered his smile with his hand.

“You seem to be in so much shock! Aren’t you relieved?”

“I’d rather kill myself now, then to be your last meal!” She screamed back at him, eyeing the door but before she could even take a step towards it- he had appeared before her.

“Why don’t we start over..?” He pretended to be upset, by her words- yet his eyes did not mirror the sentiment.

“My name is Dōma! What’s yours?” He beamed, as if her answer would be the most interesting thing he’d ever hear. Though, a silence grew beyond the two. Their eyes peering into one another. Dōma’s beamed with anticipation yet there was this..odd feeling to them..

Was it the colour of his eyes?

YN’s eyes were fierce, the fear long hidden within her now- as she had always been taught to do.

“It’s almost as if you’re trying to kill me with that look!

“I am.”

“..they say not to bite the hand that feeds you..I was the one to save you from that horrible wound” His voice grew cold, almost devoid of emotion.

“You shouldn’t have.” YN mirrored his tone.

“You shouldn’t say such things! You should appreciate life! Afterall, that’s all humans have..you all..inevitably die..” He closed the distance between the two, peering into her eyes, observing.

“I’d have preferred to live the miserable life I had lived then and dying from that horrible wound, than living within your presence to only be devoured by you.” She spat at him, though she couldn’t help but swallow the pool of saliva growing in her throat. No matter how hard she tried, his sheer aura sent shivers down her spine.

“A miserable life? You found no joy in your life..? How unfortunate” He mirrored a tone of pity

How strange he is

“Humans really are..pathetic things...aren’t they?” His face became completely devoid of any trace of emotion, she was taken aback by the expressionless look in his eye. As if she was peering into darkness itself.

“What…?”

“To understand the beauty of all things living, you must first peer into the darkness.. It’s there to help us understand it. Would life be beautiful if we never knew what sorrow and misery felt like?”

His face quickly changed back to his signature smile, he rested a hand on her head.

“Is this what you tell yourself as you indulge yourself in massacring people?”

She was taken aback by his laugh

“Oh, dear. I simply save them from a life they can no longer see the beauty in! Simply pathetic beings! Cant see what’s further than what’s in front of them”

“And you believe, you’re saving me from a life I ‘No longer see the beauty in’..? What about what I would like?” YN removed herself from his grasp.

His eyes beamed, curious. “What is it?”

“To leave, if you’re not going to kill me- I’m not staying.” She tried to usher him out of the way, by swatting her hand at him but he simply caught her wrist and pulled it back- which caused her to fall into his chest. His other hand quickly grasped her waist, firmly and sharply.

“I didn’t say you could leave”

Her eyes grew wider, peering into the redness of his shirt.

I can’t leave..?

My last moments are going to be toyed with by a demon that wears the face of a man

How ironic

In truth, YN had been one of the many young girls who worked in the entertainment district; having met a variety of men that left all types of memories that disgusted her to her core. This was not dying with dignity, but humiliation. Her mind froze for a moment, trying to find an ounce of something to hit the demon back with but she fell to silence. Perhaps if she bored him to death, he would kill her. Yet he did nothing, and simply stood there. Listening to her heartbeat that accelerated every growing moment- oh, how he wondered how that felt

To be so afraid, you freeze and your heart begins to beat out of your chest

Even if she tried to bore him to death, he’d find something to find interest in- she was eccentric! She was the opposite of what he thought her to be! How couldn’t he not want to know more?

Suddenly, Dōma reached out to YN’s chin, forcing her to look up at him.

“How about a game?”

“A game?”

“Stay here, until you die of old age!”

Where..was here?

“It’s not like you have anything else, anyone else..your town, gone- along with any familiars”

Her eyes widened, she had failed to realise the gravity of her situation the previous night- everything..was in flames

Her hand subconsciously touched her wound

His hand moved to the side of her cheek, caressing the skin.

“Besides, what life is it serving men?” He whispered, the smile never faltering.

“..So..serve a demon instead..” She scoffed

“No, you’d have free will.” He beamed with amusement

“At paradise faith!”

“How is this a game..you’re asking me to..live out my life..here..? Why.” She stared at him, with confusion

“Because you intrigue me; it’s not often I’m met with a human who knows what I am, who isn’t begging for mercy” His voice became a chilling cold tone.

“If I started, would you?" She didn't need to say more, for him to understand the question.

He didn’t, he never did no matter how much she begged. Months passed, and she was met with laughs, snorts, rolling of the eyes- no matter how much she cried and begged for him to just simply get it over with. He never did. During her ‘fits’ as he liked to call them, he’d simply sit down, rest his elbow on a surface with his head on his palm. His eyes always beamed with curiosity, excitement as she screamed, and tears ran down her face. As if this was a play for him to enjoy. Then he’d hold her shaking body and tell her everything would be okay, as if he wasn’t the problem. She tried to steal one of his golden fan’s once, to maybe slice her throat with it. She was met with a hand around her throat- and nothing more. She tried to insult him, hurt his pride, his weird cult- nothing worked. He’d dismiss her like a child having a fit. He’d often converse with her, force her to speak her mind on whatever subject he had chosen- which is why he found her intriguing. He was so sure, when she was lost in thought in his questions that she’d forget what he was, where she was- which was her beauty; her unique perspective of the world, of emotions. He slowly started to think he understood them, although devoid of them. He was so sure, she would be the key to helping him understand such a complex tool- he didn’t want her to leave his side.

Had it become obsession?

The way he would dismiss his followers, if she so beckoned- how he found no joy in his meals any more apart from her crude reactions to the blood. How he thought of her every waking moment of the day. How he pondered on her opinions, thought them over- found the beauty in her speech. She wouldn’t be salvaged forever if he devoured her, because her beauty was in her liveness, in what she’s lived, how she lives and how she speaks. He simply and utterly didn’t want to do it. He only ever wanted to feel her warm breath against his ice cold skin. That made him feel alive. If only she ever allowed him to show her how much he truly did appreciate her; if she’d devote herself to him entirely. But she just wouldn’t, and it captivated him more- she did not see him as a messenger of God. But he saw her as a sign from something above, although he knew, nothing was there. He would devote himself to her, if she allowed it. He sought her touch, yet her hate grew by the time and he was so oblivious to it. Why cant she love me?

She inspired him to be more, he didn’t want to revel in the slaughter anymore, he didn’t feel alive anymore in the cruelty- but his heart beat when she spoke. He had never listened so attentively to someone before, so closely. Was it love?

He’d need to ask her about that next

Dōma walked attentively down to YN’s room, curious as to what she might respond with. He was trying to formulate an idea in his head

How exciting

Until

He was absolutely stricken with horror as he opened the shoji, to be met with a gruesome sight.

Fresh blood stained the floods, as her body laid beside it. The blood quickly nauseated all of his other senses, the smell was so sweet to him.

“Oh, Oh dear”

She was still alive, but barely.

He approached her quickly, setting her head on his lap as he looked at what she had done to herself. A gaping wound in both of her wrists stared back at him- she had lost so, so much blood

Dōma’s heart skipped a beat, it only ever beat

..for her

And for what?

He stared at her, her eyes had shut, covered by her hair, her lips had grown pale and cold and the life within her skin slowly decreased. He could fear her heartbeat becoming slower, and her body becoming colder.

What an odd..sentiment

His hands would have shook, if he was capable of it.

He felt something, something alien to him but he couldn’t describe it no matter how hard he tried.

The second time..

Someone he endeared took their live

He wouldn’t allow this repetitive cycle to continue

A quick slash to his wrist caused a waterfall of blood to emerge- trickling down to her mouth.

He could only hope he would chose her.

Mere hours later, YN awoke in Dōma’s chambers. An insatiable hunger in her stomach almost brought her to puking. She couldn’t remember what had happened.. her name..? What was it ..? Where was she..?

“YN! I’m so glad you’re okay!” She was met with a familiar set of rainbow coloured eyes, who seemed to be genuinely happy.

She groaned, bringing her hand to her head- feeling an annoying headache form- which is when she realised.

The length of which her nails had grown, much sharper, much more predatory.

She stared back at Dōma, who watched attentively.

She suddenly remembered, all of the blood, all of the pain.

She suddenly jumped up from his futon, and pulled up the hems of the sleeves of her kimono- to reveal no cuts. The pit in her stomach grew even wider, but not from hunger- rage and hate.

She ran to the mirror, her kimono loosely falling down at the shoulders- as she stared back at a monster that was not herself. Her hair, had turned to such a white colour- and her eyes- predatory, those of a killer. She opened her mouth, to reveal the set of sharp canines that now housed her mouth. She gasped, before a large hand snaked itself around her waist. Dōma’s head rested in the nook of her neck. YN screamed. “How could you do this to me! I never asked for this! You’re so selfish that even when I decided to take my own life, by my own hands, by my own meanings. You interfere like the parasite that you are!” Her screaming only grew louder but he did not reply, he did not react. He simply held her body, as she tried to fight him off- but even now as a Demon, she was still weaker. “You’re a horrible void sucking monster! Let me go!” Her screaming had turned to cries, the tears had ran down her face, staining her now pale complexion. She thought herself a horrid monster- yet Dōma found her beauty to still be exquisite. Her knees threatened to fall down to the ground, he held her weak and limp body up as she scream cried into the air. He reached out to turn her, to face him- he held her face in his hands.

His signature smile reappeared but his eyes grew more intensely and bright than they ever did before.

“I told you, you weren’t going to leave. Ever”

part 2

Hate

It was such a complex emotion.

It was something a person felt at the very depth of their core, of their soul. But what is hate? If not accompanied by rage? And what is rage? If not accompanied by pain and sorrow? But pain and sorrow, couldn’t be felt without joy and joy couldn’t be felt without love.

All emotions, that the man that sat before her, was completely and utterly vacant of.

Dōma sat cross legged, his chin resting on his palm- as he always did. He sat there as if there was nothing wrong, as if he wasn’t covered in blood- as if she wasn’t either. As if, there weren’t various slashes and cuts in the fabric of his clothes, and likewise her.

What was hate, if there was no cruelty? No violence? No urge to kill them?

Would hate, not then be meaningless?

She would make him pay for what he did to her- even if he didn’t care, even if he didn’t flinch, even if he secretly liked the attention. It made her feel better, and that was enough- for now.

YN stood there, her hair had grown to an immense length and her complexion had only become paler. She resembled the devil that sat before her, now.

Her own divine punisher, how cruel. She certainly didn’t believe in a God now..

Her dress, a white colour to resemble her hair- a gift from the man she despised.

Riches wouldn’t buy her heart, she wasn’t sure she had one any more, but that only made her hate herself more; as each day passed- she became more like Dōma.

More cruel, more ravenous, more despicable.

Each time, she looked in the mirror- all she could see was the similar hair coloured that now nested in her roots, the similar void in her eyes and the similar porcelain complexion. But he adored it. He wouldn’t let her forget how beautiful he thought she was now, how they were the same now, how they’ll be together forever.

It took time, to brush her long hair, now. She’d sit in front of the mirror, tears prickling the corners of her eyes until he would appear out of the shadows. He’d snake his arm around her and take the brush. How she despised him so, yet the man was so arrogant and stubborn- he always did get his way.

“I..despise you” YN finally mustered out.

She was met with a snort.

“Do you?” Dōma’s head tilted to the side, his eyes for a brief moment became completely blank yet his tone remained all the while mockful.

How sad, it was- for such beautiful colours, to be so dull, she thought.

“More than anything, in this life and the next.” Her voice shook, tears threatened to fall, all this time spent screaming, crying, scratching and hitting him over and over again. All it was, was a constant reminder of life’s misery.

And every time, the cycle was the same.

She’d yell, she’d scream

He’d ignore her, laugh at her

She’d hit him and he would hit back

She would cry, he would pretend to care

And he never did forget, to remind her that she was his.

Suddenly Dōma stood, all injuries he had obtained had already vanished into thin air but the blood still stained the floor, as did all that time ago..the memory still engraved into his mind.

YN stared at the floor, as she heard his body slowly reach hers. He cupped her face in his hands, another reminder of how small she was, how weak, how irrelevant she was in the world.

“You really shouldn’t say such false things, hm?” He smiled, a monster hid beneath the mask.

“..The sight of you makes me sick” Her voice was quiet, almost a whisper.

Dōma stayed silent for a moment, before he spoke

“I saved you, how could you say such mean things..?” His voice grew colder, as did the sensation in his hands, but neither could feel such things any more.

“You wanted to die?” His face slowly approached YN’s ear, as he pulled the hair out of the way. His breath hitting her skin and his teeth making an appearance as he spoke.

“Did you want me to lay your rotting corpse in the courtyard? For all to see? How pitiful you are?”

His voice, was devoid of anything at all. This was the afterlife, accompanied with darkness itself, the void itself- devoid of anything.

“It was so disappointing, that someone as intelligent like you..would believe there’s anything after this cruel life..” His eyes met hers.

“I don’t. But anywhere else is better if you’re not there.” She spat back at him, the hate as bright as ever in her eyes.

“Don’t say such things..YN” He masked a look of sadness

“I do enjoy how you always keep me on my feet, but would it kill you to smile?” He turned his head to the side, wrapping a hand around the crane of her neck and the other on her cheek. He treated her like a child, and to him, she probably was. YN approached him, their bodies against each other. She stared into those dull eyes of his, no matter how hard he tried- she would see past his fonts and his masks. She leaned up to him, leaving mere centimetres between the pairs lips- his eyes never faltered, never blinked and neither did hers. Yet his heart beat, and hers did not.

“I’ll smile when the sun fucking burns you”

Dōma giggled, his grasp tightening. “Oh, how romantic” He cheerfully smiled

“but”

“I’ve grown tired of this game, YN” She yelped as his hand rapidly met her jugular instead- squeezing it violently. He would pop her head out of her socket, if he so desired- but where’s the fun?

“You scream, and you kick- When will you love me?” He whispered, his gaze never leaving her eyes.

“Could you ever? I’ve began to wonder..”

“You once said, you’d love someone who’d devote themselves to you, and who understood you beyond compare..but you don’t love me, you never could- can you?” His grip tightened, the tears now began to fall. He wasn’t going to kill her, she knew. He would torture her before he killed her, he would make her life worse than it is- just as a reminder of what he is and who is. To remind her of her place. But it wasn’t out of bad volition- he’d care for her afterwards, like he always did when he went too far. When he showed her who truly was stronger, that he could stop her fits within seconds if he wanted to- but he didn’t- because he wanted to please her! Make her feel better! Isn’t that what you do in a relationship? They were in a relationship, after all. The fact she wouldn’t let him near her, didn’t bother him at all! After all, sex was a mundane activity, he was devoid of anything- he could only fantasize about the feeling that lust gives you, but he could never truly ever actually feel it. He could only mirror it, copy, mimic- at core, he was nothing at all.

Even the devil weeps, but he didn’t.

“I gave you a chance at life...to be what you want, who you want to be- to not serve men! I only asked of you to remain at my side. Yet the months go by, and..you continue this facade of hate.”

“Have I not been good? Have I not listened to your every wish since? I’ve tried to make it up to you, YN.”

All she could do was stare, in shock? In offence at his words? But the way he spoke, and the words he chose always did have impact- he was taught the art of speech from the youngest age- he met all kinds of people, all kinds of stories who sought the words of a God- and oh, did he provide.

Deep inside her heart, she couldn’t help but rethink her actions. Had she been cruel? Too cruel? He always did try. Was that not enough? And deep down, she did know- all she had was him.

Living a normal life now, with a husband and children was impossible, physically impossible.

Living anywhere else, a demon slayer would certainly catch whiff of her- she didn’t know how to live the life of prey, and predator. But Dōma, he had lived for years- he understood this life.

He understood the brutality of it all.

A second chance at life? Yet all she had done was scream and cry and reject it entirely

Had it truly been her fault, all along?

“You know, all you have is me- and it’s all you need.

I would give you the world, if you sought it- I would shape it to your liking, it would be your world. All you have to do..is one small..little thing.”

She felt weak, mentally and physically. Her mind no longer the vast wonders and thoughts she used to have, but blank like a puppet. His eyes almost seemed hypnotic now, and his smile..that devilish smile

And that confirmation, that reminder

That she did in fact, only have him- was enough to break her.

“One small..little thing?”

She repeated, almost robotic, the tears in her eyes still formed and they still poured down her face.

He hummed In response, as he approached her ear once again. His body leaned down to her level

“To love me..as I love you.”

His voice was almost angelic, yet any peering eyes would know it was a devil’s gamble.

A deal with the devil, rather. A deal with the most despicable of them all, but what other choice?

Behead herself, or walk into the sun? Did she have the willpower for that again? To know she would die for good? Did she really want to cease to exist? Who would remember her?

Dōma?

‘As I love you’

The words meant nothing to her, she knew they were false. He wasn’t capable of love, he admitted to her he felt utterly nothing. How wrong, she would be if she knew the truth of it all.

Of course, this wasn’t love, as anyone would describe it. But it was love, in some shape or form. If your heat beat, in excitement for someone- did it not mean something? When it would never beat at all?

“Devote yourself to me, as I’ve devoted myself to you, how romantic it’d be no?

If we both helped saving those poor innocent souls..”

He meant reviling in slaughter.

“You’d be my wife, at my side. All would envy you, as your beauty knows no bounds. No harm would ever come to you, you’d do as please. The world would be yours, you just have to..love me”

His words were like programming.

Perhaps this was his plan all along, to break her into two, to make her a doll devoid of anything at all. To suck the innocence out of her heart and mind- create a monster equal to him.

She wondered, if her life would be better. If she simply did, just say she loved him. Perhaps the hate would dissipate, perhaps he’d treat her better. Perhaps she wouldn’t be a toy any more, to play with and break apart at his will. A familiar pit in her stomach grew, fear. Fear of the unknown

Perhaps he wouldn’t keep her here, against her will- but was it even against her will any more? She had many opportunities to leave, forever. Yet she never did. Because she always knew, she only had him. What life, if bound by solitude?

But what life, if bound by the devils grasp?

That was the devils gamble

One hell or the other.

His eyes peered into hers, tilting her chin up with his index finger- her eyes slowly lifting to meet his gaze.

He was awaiting her answer, she knew. And she knew deep down, what her choice was. The only choice she ever had.

“Okay..” Was all she could muster out, a weak simple word.

“Okay, what?” There was that, absence of emotion once again.

“I…”

His smile, retuned though it took much more of a sinister look to it.

“will..love you..” A tear rolled down her face, Dōma simply rubbed it into her skin.

“Until death do us part..” He hummed, with excitement.

What was hate, without love?

It would be meaningless.

Dōma placed a kiss on YN’s head, relishing the contact.

She knows she’s made a mistake. But, it doesn’t take that much to break someone apart, and put them back together to your liking. Her words never meant anything to him, her screaming and crying was simply background sound. A deal with the devil to even grasp a fraction of solitude- she could only envy his followers, a sweet release of death.

But she was so afraid of it. Her body felt utterly weak, as if it no longer belonged to her. Dōma instantly took notice.

“You poor thing, let’s have you rest hm?” He gently guided her to lay down, her head on his lap. He hummed and stroked it. In a moment like this, she would have thought him to be a kind man- as he desperately tries to make her believe, but she knew better. She had seen him, covered in blood that was alien to him and corpses surrounding him like trophies, as he feasted. All the smell, had attracted a lower demon, who had tried to start a turf war over her meal- Dōma had quickly ended the altercation, with a new head to gift Gyokko; as he told her.

She suddenly peered her eyes open, to remember the state she was in, covered in blood.

It had even stained her hair, she looked up to Dōma who was already looking at her- to be met with a familiar sight. Even now, he always reminded her of herself as his hair had taken the same gruesome look as well. “Tell me, what are you thinking?” He asked, gently- his smile warm though it was only a facade. “I can’t stand having your blood on me like this” She spoke quietly yet the disgust in her words remained. She slowly got up from his lap, feeling obviously groggy. “Oh dear! Aren’t husbands and wives supposed to share their bodily fluids?” He raised a finger up in question, but he was only teasing- he knew better. And her face only grew more disgusted at both the statement and the sentiment of ‘husband and wife’.

We aren’t even married.

“I’m going to bathe.” She changed the subject yet before she could completely slip out of Dōma’s grasp, he grabbed onto her wrist. “Oh, but I’d like to come.” He smiled, innocently- but it wasn’t an innocent smile at all. In truth, YN wouldn’t have cared. Many before have seen her naked body, Dōma has probably spied on her before, she didn’t care- yet she knew where this was going. He wanted to ‘seal the deal’. Even though, he had no pleasure in the activity, he wanted her to be pleased with his capacities to pleasure, he couldn’t have her looking for another demon now, could he? “I’d like some time to myself, Dōma” She explained, with a gentle voice- she would simply match his facade. The hate would, one day dissipate, wouldn’t it? Had he eternally punished her? Or was he her saving grace? She was at an internal fight.

“Oh, but you’re so tired! That was some fight!” He knew no bounds, so she accepted.

As he stood, his head once again met the crook of her neck, where his teeth lightly grazed the surface. “You know,” He paused. His breath hitting her skin.

“I really think..I do love you.”

It wasn’t love, it never will be.

final part

"“I would feed my heart to you, if you just asked, my love.”"

The thunder crackled throughout the black clouds and ashen sky, a mirky smell of humidity to accompany it. Every animal had already fled back to it’s designated den, and every little critter had hidden behind various rocks stones and trees. They all hid for a reason, they all hid from something.

That was mother nature, that was the way of life.

YN sat on the makeshift stone bench, watching the clouds get darker and angrier. How she understood those clouds all too well. There was always a sensation of peace, and calmness before a storm rolled in- she had sat all afternoon observing it. Yet, even through that serenity, there’s a slight whiff of something sinister. It’s hard to catch it, not all can sense it. But it’s there, lurking and forming. How it mirrored her heart so. She had became herself again, observant and thoughtful, curious and artistic. How it pleased the devil she housed with. He was so content, that she regained her beauty, her liveness- but especially that her love for him did not falter.

Though, even now she wondered if she truly loved him with all her heart, or if it was fear- fear of solitude, of death.

So, she chose to love him. In some shape of form, touching somebody’s body in the name of love, is still love. Doing favours and tasks, conversing and bathing- it was enough for him. After all, the only thing that mattered to him, was the conversing. She didn’t lose her humanity, tears would still prickle her eyes as she ate her meals- Dōma would simply laugh and tease her. But he wanted to understand, and she helped him. She helped him understand emotions he couldn’t fathom to comprehend. But one still escaped her, explaining love. She had tried, yet she didn’t comprehend it herself entirely. For Dōma, his love showed itself violently yet also gracefully. He had already killed in her name, on multiple occasions, but he’d also bathe her body so tenderly- as if his palms weren’t stained with the blood of thousands. She had grown accustomed to that sentiment. Allowing a killer to touch her, to stroke her hair, to whisper soft words in her ear- but was she not the same now? Was she not also a killer? She did it because she had to survive, like all creatures- but she had became his creature. All who knew this, knew she was his weakness.

A weakness he made, that he allowed- for the simple craving of what he could never have.

But that’s how it usually works, isn’t it?

Envious for something you cannot obtain, cannot have.

His eyes, always peered to hers. And that gentle smile, only ever faltered for her.

She had grown to accept Dōma, for being this way. It was strange, if someone said to her now- that he was a brutal killer, and a monster. She wouldn’t disagree, but she would still fight in his name; How strange it was, to spend so much time by someone’s side that you would still pick them over a warm heart, and not a cold one. But, being around coldness makes you used to it- the warmth begins to burn. And this was true vice versa, but Dōma didn’t think the heat burned, no. Instead, he fantasied about the touch. Like a moth attracted to a flame, her heart was his saving grace.

He truly did feel something for her.

Time had become irrelevant, she did not know how long she had been at the temple- she did not know how long she had known Dōma now. Yet, it did not matter, because old age would escape her now as it would him.

Together, for eternity, as he’d say

She took in a deep breath, the humidity entering her lungs. A solitary bird, flew over the court yard- and she couldn’t help to wonder what that felt like. To be free, to go wherever you want, to not be plagued with the mind of a thinker.

Dōma appeared from behind her, he bent over to her height to place a kiss on her cheek.

“I’ve been looking for you all over, my love.” He smiled.

She didn’t reply, instead she kept her gaze up at the sky. Dōma’s followed, the colours in his eyes seeming more dim than usual.

As he sat down, his hand travelled along her thigh, moving his thumb in a circular motion. YN’s eyes didn’t falter from the sky. She never knew what he wanted, he was a man, or more so devil, incapable of understanding.

“If I died, what would you do?” Suddenly, Dōma spoke. The question itself made YN’s eyes jump to his face, and without a surprise, she was met with utter nothingness.

“Why would you ask such a question?” Her voice was quiet and meek. Not because the subject of death itself bothered her but because she, in truth, was utterly afraid of what she would do. Her entire existence revolved around him. As a human, she had no family and no understanding of her place in the world- taught to simply serve men and nothing more. It was a skill of survival not of life. Yet, regardless of what he had done to her- forcing her to come to his sanctuary with him, breaking her apart for his own amusement and satisfaction- he had never touched her without her permission. He had never taken advantage of her, nor had he ever put her in any real danger apart from herself. If he hurt her, he made sure it was a lesson and not a beating. Though, she had hurt him too. It was simply how their love worked, there cannot be hate without love- and there cannot be hate without violence. If he died, she would have no meaning whatsover. She didn’t have friends. She didn’t relate to the cultists who believed in a God who didn’t exist, whom was dead. And if he was real, he certainly laughed at their pity and despair. She didn’t relate to them at all, because she was in fact not human any more. It was an aspect she often forgot, and her creator, before her- had been the one to teach her everything she knew. How could she not have some sort of pact with him? Regardless of the hate she had buried deep within her, regardless of the lies she told herself. That was life, that survival. And he didn’t care, because words, were just words. And actions, were just actions.

She swallowed.

“I don’t know.”

“Would you find someone else?” He asked, his gaze turning to hers. His eyes would always become so dull, and it never made her fail to realise, how utterly vacant he was.

“No.” She answered truthfully. Because, the raw and hard truth was, she couldn’t ever love someone again. Not because of some hidden morals but because he had destroyed the meaning. His love was so violent yet so tender at the same time, any other form would seem meaningless and empty to her. It wouldn’t be love to her anymore. All the screaming and all the blood would accompany all the nights spent with nails in her thighs and sweet little nothings in her ear. How, could she even possibly fathom to find, such a distasteful love ever again?

Yet she wouldn’t have it either way, and neither would he.

Dōma didn’t answer, he turned his gaze back to the sky. The question had spawned worry in YN.

Did he do it on purpose?

Or was he genuinely curious?

“Are you afraid of dying?” She finally mustered out, her hand rested itself on his- to which he stopped his movements.

“No.”

“Yet, I’m afraid of you dying.”

The statement didn’t surprise her, instead it filled with her an odd sense of false security. No matter how violent and toxic he was, he would protect her- but maybe just not from him.

Soon, the droplets of rain began to fall.

Without another word, Dōma had gently guided YN to her feet, and his hand met her lower back before he leaned down to her ear.

“If you did die, I’d kill myself to join you.”

Her heart had skipped a beat for a moment.

The statement itself didn’t shock her but the tone he had used. It had a certain animosity to it, it wasn’t devoid of emotion but it didn’t exactly have any either.

That was when that pit of fear begun to emerge in her stomach again.

Fear of the unknown.

She was right to have observed the storm rolling in, because something had changed.

But, as they entered the temple- she was suddenly remembered of his words long ago.

“Until death do us part.”

Did he mean that, literally?

Did he know something she didn’t?

Was he planning to kill her? Or was he ordered to? Or was he simply in a bad mood?

If he was going to kill her, she’d rather know than not. He could atleast have the decency to give her the mental preparation , though he always was a selfish man- even in bed. Which was quite ironic considering he didn’t even care for it but saw it as more of a hobby.

Lost in thought, she had failed to realise he had guided them to their bedroom. It was odd, considering prayer time was soon and the two would be expected to make an appearance.

Before she could speak, she was met with his cold lips against hers. It wasn’t rough, but it wasn’t exactly passionate either. It was hungry.

For Dōma, the heat that radiated off of her lips was almost intoxicating. They weren’t cold like his, her heart constantly beat, with fire and warmth. How she resembled him so, yet not at the same time. In truth, he had done this on purpose. He had orchestrated the entire thing. He already knew, who she was before he found her almost dead. After all, he was the one who impaled her.

But she didn’t know that, and she didn’t need to know.

The entire reasoning of it all was for a simple reason.

A life long partner.

Although he didn’t understand love and affection, he wasn’t oblivious to social cues. He knew nobody truly actually liked him. And his devoted followers loved him because they were told to.

But he could force someone to love him, couldn’t he? Afterall that was what that woman had told him, when he sought counselling on his troubles. Of course, her good advice now lays in the bowels of his stomach.

So, he had stalked for a partner.

The entertainment district, had truly never failed to amaze him. There were all kinds of people, and beautiful women- he just had to choose wisely- and he did at that. It was a rarity for him to have bad taste after all.

In truth, he knew everything about her before she even knew of his existence.

He knew she had no family, no ties to the outside world- that she was born into this work and never truly knew what love was. It was easy, he just had to make her believe this was love because he was incapable of showing it any other way.

He had found her to be quite exquisite, and he had already noticed that fire inside of her. The warmth that he had been looking for, for a century.

His mother was unable to give it to him, and another woman failed at it- she would be the last option. If she failed, he would kill himself entirely. He had decided.

He would die in a battle, he knew that.

Regardless, before he died- he wanted to know what love felt like. He was always so cold, he had become numb to it and although she was the same breed of monster he was now, she wasn’t so cold.

He knew he’d have to break her into two to make her love him

He knew, he’d have to lie and deceive her- but did he ever claim to not be the devil?

After all, he is cunning but also beautiful- and he once was an angel.

Perhaps this was a pointless fight, to be fighting for something that he will never truly obtain- but he’s had everything he’s ever wanted apart from that.

He didn’t care for walking in the sun or power

He revelled in slaughter because it made him feel something and likewise now, he could only fall under the spell she had put under him.

His hands travelled up her waist and down to her hip bone before he lightly bit at her bottom lip.

What would she say, if she knew?

She was so erratic, maybe she would kill herself. Afterall she tried it once before, who’s to say she wouldn’t again? She would leave him wouldn’t she? Why would she not? Everyone else had.

Everyone he had ever taken a liking to, would simply leave.

Perhaps he shouldn’t have turned her into a demon in the first place

Maybe he wasn’t deserving of love

“Dōma?”

Suddenly, his mind wandered back to reality. It was not often that he zoned out, after all, he was so perceptive- yet when it came to her, he became a man he didn’t even recognise.

He hadn’t even noticed, that he placed her onto the bed, and loomed over her. He had kissed her neck before abruptly stopping and his gaze becoming devoid of any emotion.

“What’s wrong?”

How funny it was, he thought. That she cared

His signature smile returned, as his slightly closed yet were still open enough to see those multicoloured eyes.

“Nothing at all, my love- since you’re here with me” He whispered, and placed another kiss on the crane of her neck before moving to her collarbone before he was met with a rather violent pull of his hair which led him for just a moment- to widen his eyes.

“First, you ask me such a ridiculous question, then this, and then you just suddenly gaze into nothing. Explain yourself.” Her voice had broke, she wasn’t upset but worried and dumbfounded.

He always kept her emotions in disarray.

Should he tell her?

Would it be proof of her love if he did?

That he had in fact orchestrated the entire thing?

One of his hands reached up to her cheek, as he stroked it lightly.

“Do you remember, how we met?” He asked, gently.

“When you..kidnapped me?” She scoffed, looking back at the memory it was foggy and blurry. A reminder of a previous life, a life where she still didn’t have any freedom.

“Hm, yes I suppose..for you..that’s how we met.” His tone became cold.

“..?..”

“That monster, that you had seen- it was me, my dear.”

“I was the one that caused the city to become ruin.”

She was met with horror as distant memories suddenly became anew.

She had shoved them to the back of her head, she hadn’t once thought about what she had seen.

Only the flames, were describable but not the other horrors.

The way the other girls were screaming and crying as pillars of wood fell and the smell of copper filled the halls. Mutated legs and arms scattered around the building like children’s toys.

And the sudden golden tinted fan that had her in her chest before she fell from the window.

It was in an effort to catch her.

Her mouth grew dry.

She had understood now, why their first encounter was so strange. He didn’t decide to keep her on a whim, he had decided long before. He had caused the city to burn, for her. In an effort to break her, to have her. To make her believe that he was her saviour, her god.

“..What..”

What, was the only word she could muster out as Dōma shadowed over her.

His eyes had a glint in them, they weren’t so dim. As if he was glad to have the lie between them finally revealed, as if they growing anew- as if this would be true love.

“I had seen you, quite a few months back- walking home after working.”

He smiled

“Oh, it was quite funny, you didn’t even see the poor girl I was feasting on..”

His canines shined under the small luminosity that housed the room

“But, you just caught my eye. You were so beautiful! And just so lost in your own mind, it was exactly what I was looking for! I had to know more.”

He bent down now, cheerfully and joyous as he placed a toothy kiss to her neck.

Goosebumps filled her body.

“You..stalked me.. and then burnt the entire fucking city to the ground?”

Her voice broke again, she was dumbfounded? Afraid?

Horrified was more the word for it.

“And I would burn the world, just for you.

You didn’t need that city, what good did it do? It only harmed you, my love.”

He pleaded his case.

“You were exactly what I was looking for, intelligent and creative yet you had this striking beauty to you, though the sadness and despair wasn’t something I had ignored either- I wanted to save you, you poor thing.” He whispered into her ear, yet the words meant nothing- it only fuelled the sickening feeling in her stomach.

“You..manipulated me..?” Her voice had grown quiet, tears now threatening the corners of her eyes.

“Oh, YN. You were always so exquisite when you cried.” Dōma approached his mouth to her left eye, before gently licking the corner.

It filled her with disgust.

“You..took everything away from me..and then denied me death just..for-..for-” YN couldn’t finish the sentence before a muffled sob escaped her mouth.

“Took everything away..? You never had anything in the first place..

I gave you everything you’d ever need” He stroked his thumb on her cheek.

She wanted to tell him to get out, to scream at him and to cry and sob.

After all this time, she had been so stupid

She had ignored the simple truth, because she had already known.

Yet, she couldn’t accept it, because she had nobody else.

The hate had dissipated, for the simple reason of lying to herself.

Dōma now telling her and affirming her suspensions all along, all in some sick and twisted way of proving his love to her made her realise, that what she had grown to love was a monster, and would only ever be a monster.

He didn’t just kidnap her, he destroyed everything in his path to make sure she had nothing else to return to. That he would be the only thing she would have, turning him into the same creature that he was, into the same monstrosity- was assurance.

He didn’t manipulate her in his mind, he simply bent the truth.

Stalking was such a big word, he had only just learnt every single detail about her before making his move. Was that normal? He wanted results, not failure.

Her muffled sobs brought a grin to his face, an erratic one. He always did like to see her cry, it reminded him that she still had her humanity- that she was still so different from him.

He approached her ear with a sweet shushing sound as if to soothe her.

“I even kept their bodies, in case you ever missed them”

“...you’re fucking sick” YN finally managed to muster out, with a cry to accompany it.

“If being in love with you makes me sick, then so be it!” He cheerfully smiled

“This isn’t love!” She tried to push him off, but he was stronger. He always was. He pinned both of her wrists down with one arm- his veins making an appearance.

“You don’t think I love you, YN?” Dōma masqueraded a look of sadness before a golden fan met his free his hand, with a swift movement, it opened.

“Do you want me to prove to you, that I do?”

His voice became devoid of any emotion.

Before YN could answer, or even comprehend his sudden act- she was met with a gush of blood hitting her face.

A small empty laugh filled her ears and as she looked, she realised he had slit his throat open- the fan was still impaled into his neck and was making it’s way through the bone deeper.

“I love you so much I’d be prepared to die for you, are you?”

Before she could react, the fan had already met her neck.

She whimpered as it slightly cut her skin- though he hadn’t cut her nearly as deep as he had cut himself.

His skin had already begin to heal.

“There shouldn’t be any lies between us, my love. If you died, I’d go utterly insane.”

“Please..get off of me.” She whimpered as her white hair and porcelain skin was now stained with his blood. Though, he himself didn’t care. Instead, he shoved another kiss on her lips. This time it was rough, a mixture of the taste of blood and saliva pooled the two’s mouths as he harshly bit at her lip. In an effort to make him stop even for just a moment, she bit him back yet this caused absolutely no reaction at all and seemed to just fuel his blood lust further.

He pretended to be a kind man when in truth, he was nothing but hell itself among mortals.

“What does it matter?” He finally breathed into her mouth.

“It was so long ago now, hm?” He stroked her hair, his own fingers stained with crimson red.

“It matters because you killed everyone that I knew! You burnt my home to ash!” She cried out

“Had you not said, you had lived a life of a misery?” He tilted his head, to which YN was met with silence in her own mind.

She had said that, hadn’t she.

“Did I not give you a somewhat better life? Regardless of my past actions? As they say, let’s not cry over spoiled milk, my dear.”

“..Why..”

Dōma reflected for a moment

“Does it matter?” He asked, emotionless.

It didn’t, she had concluded.

It didn’t matter, because regardless she was stuck here. She wouldn’t leave, she knew she wouldn’t. She was stuck within the devils grasp- and he wasn’t letting go.

Deep down, maybe she knew the answer. But it didn’t matter.

It never did, because in truth, she would most likely die from her hand- and him his own.

It was a story that was never bound to have a happy ending.

After all, their entire existence was against the codes of nature and so was this so called love.

“I would feed my heart to you, if you just asked, my love.”

She wished, she had killed herself that day.

#kny #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer #kny x reader #kny douma #kny doma #kny doma x reader #kny douma x reader #douma x reader #kimetsu no yaba x reader #demon slayer x reader #anime x reader #xreader #femalereader #yandere douma #yandere doma #yanderexreader #yandere x female reader

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dellalyra · 1 year

Note

you putting “megumi needs his mom rn” in the cw makes me wonder how he and the family reacted to yuuji dying after the detention center mission (and also what was the reaction to him coming back since i’m assuming gojo told reader before they revealed it to everyone else)

Family Formations - Part Eleven

Summary: Deja vu visits you when your son loses his best friend.

Warning: swearing, angst, acc kinda soft too, mourning, mentions of blood and vomiting, canon typical violence, MDNI

A/N: I had already started this fic when this request came through so loving the telepathy going on here. Also. This is sad. I’m sorry. I’ll make it worth it dw dw.

Recommended Listening:

Daylight - David Kushner

No Surprises - Radiohead

Ghost of You - 5 Seconds of Summer

Sparks - Coldplay

Your doorbell chimed, glancing at the clock hanging above the fireplace from you’d spot on the sofa, 8 pm? Satoru wasn’t due home until 9 pm plus - he just warped inside your home. Did he order your flowers again? You check the baby monitor and see your 4-month-old is still sound asleep in his crib.

Walking up to the door, you sensed a very familiar cursed energy. Megumi? What’s he doing here, it’s Wednesday.

You could hear the rain and thunder pouring and hitting your windows in waves.

You open the door, and you see nothing.

A whimper emanates from beside you, and on the ground – slumped against the doorway is your eldest boy.

You fall on your knees beside him.

“Megumi! Baby, what’s going on? You’re going to catch a cold.” You brush his hair out of his face, and you are stricken with the realisation that he is crying. His angular face is so devoid of any emotion, but the tears scream otherwise. You could count the number of times you’ve seen him cry in 10 years on one hand and you hadn’t been prepared for this tonight.

“Jesus, baby what’s going on?” You try to heave him up from the ground and he’s as limp as a rag doll as you try to guide him inside the door. The hallway is as far as you can manage his weight before you give in and shut the door to the outside world. He’s now just leaned against your sage green wall, if he wasn’t breathing, you’d think he was comatose.

Only now do you realise he’s bleeding. His lip is busted, and his eyebrow is too. But what type of curse would elicit this reaction?

“Megumi? Honey? Talk to me - what’s happened?” You kneel beside him, one hand on his shoulder, the other on the top of his head.

Empty eyes, now a dull blue, look up at you through lashes soaked with rain and tears.

“He’s dead.” The tiniest voice, again, void of emotions.

Satoru? No – you had been on the phone with him 20 minutes ago.

“He killed him.” His eyes are facing you – but they’re looking straight through you.

“Who’s dead, Megumi?” You probe – anxiety gripping your stomach like a vice.

“Sukuna – ripped his heart out. In front of me. Just ripped it out. His heart. He’s dead.” The words are barely intelligible in the mumbles that come from his out and you’re still as confused, Sukuna? How could- oh my god Yuuji is dead.

Yuuji Itadori.

Dead.

“Oh my god – fuck. Megumi, my sweet boy.” At this point, he turned to you.

He looked into your eyes.

He turned his head and vomited on the floor beside him.

You pull him into you, tears flooding your face as you think about that sweet, sweet boy – a soul too good for this world so brutally ripped out of it.

You wipe his mouth on your sweater sleeve and once again haul him up into your grasp he almost falls but you pull on every muscle fibre you had – you needed to get him dry and cleaned up.

A memory played in your mind, a sense of déjà vu – Satoru vomiting and sobbing and you shaking with tears curled up together – the loss of another best friend. The fates were cruel masters to make you relive this scene again.

Once he was up the stairs you lay him on his bed. Where he just sat on the edge, legs still on the ground and stared at his shoes. He went to vomit again, and this time you caught it with a bucket you’d retrieved from the closet.

“I need to get a cloth. I’ll be right back.” He didn’t acknowledge this. You just needed a moment to gather yourself before you went back in - you’d be no good to him if you continue to try to help in the state you're in, a mess of shock and grief and anger. White hot anger.

You shut the en suite door of his room behind you, and you rush to the toilet and heave up all of your remaining food at the mental image of that darling boy laying cold and dead and gutted on the ground.

You give yourself a moment – your son and you breathe so that you can deal with everything later – wait, does Satoru know?

Grabbing a cloth – you go into the room, laying the cloth down for a moment, you go into your and Satoru’s room and grab one of his sweatshirts. In Megumi’s room, you pull sweatpants from his wardrobe and look at your son. He’s dripping rainwater onto the carpet and there’s blood from his injuries mingling, tinging it pink.

You think some of the puddles might be tears, his or your own, you don’t know.

You stand in front of him, remembering the times when you’d do this to help him into his frog pyjamas - he was only 6 back then – 16 now and 5ft 9 – almost a whole foot taller than you. You lift his arms and unzip his jacket – his T-shirt underneath is soaked through too. You peel them both from him and check for cuts on his torso – bruises, old and fresh – but no blood.

You pull Satoru’s sweatshirt over his head, and he doesn’t even seem to notice that you’re moving him. He’s just limp in your arms, and you swear to anyone who’s listening to if you could take that pain and shoulder, it yourself then you would.

You peel his slacks down, pulling his sweatpants (a Christmas present from your brother) onto his lanky legs you tuck his hair behind his ears and dry it with a cloth. You then dab at his bleeding wounds, they’re clotting now, and the bleeding is stopping.

You throw the cloth away to the far side of the room.

He’s seen enough blood for today.

Tears are flowing freely from you both as you sit beside him on the edge of the bed.

Your proximity must trigger him back to this plane of existence and he looks at you.

“I couldn’t save him.”

“I know sweet boy, but it’s not your fault. You did everything you could.”

“It was a special grade – he, the curse had a finger. Our mission didn’t say any of that.”

“A special grade? Was Satoru there?” He couldn’t have been, he was in Osaka today.

“No. Just me and Kugisaki and Itadori.” His voice quavers.

You knew exactly what happened. It was clear from even the bare minimum you had heard.

But – now was not the time. Willing yourself to push the thoughts aside. Megumi doesn’t need that right now.

“You did everything you could, ‘Gumi. There was nothing you could have done.”

This was his kryptonite. A heavy, choked sob broke through the air and his body collapsed onto you.

“His heart – he ripped it out. He was right there and he just – momma, he’s dead. I couldn’t save him, Momma.” You broke down, sobbing yourself, cradling this boy – this poor broken boy, into your chest as you hugged him so tight you could feel every shake of his body in your own. You carefully moved. you both so you could sit against his headboard with his sobbing head laid on your stomach.

You are so grateful that Akio is a heavy-sleeping baby because you need to focus on your oldest son now. He needed you, and you were his to protect him, 100%.

You stroke his hair and whisper placating nothing into his ear. Nothing will fix this. Nothing will make it easier or make it feel better. You just need to be here; you just need to hold him now. You can tell him until the cows come home that he did all he could, he couldn’t have stopped Sukuna, that it was not his fault – but all these worlds will refuse to sink in until he’s ready to hear them. Yet, you tell him anyway. Over and over again.

You’ve no idea how much time passes. Your tears mingle with the lingering water on the side of his head as you cry with him but eventually, the sobs turn into heavy breaths, and you realise he’s passed out. Sheer exhaustion has taken his body hostage and for a second, you’re put at peace knowing at least right now – his mind will be quiet.

You slip your phone from your pocket, without moving or disturbing the boy on your lap.

‘Please call me.’ A message from Satoru.

You ring him.

The phone barely dials once before you hear his voice – hoarse.

“Y/N. I –”

“I know ‘Toru. Megumi came home.”

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t there.” He sounds so broken.

“You have no reason to be sorry baby, we both know how this managed to come to pass.” You hated that he always still felt the weight of the whole world on his shoulders.

“I’ll kill them all.” He says, and you know he’s serious.

“You could, but you won’t. Maybe 10 years ago – maybe then we’d have done it together. But not now, not anymore.” You reply, voice still thick with tears.

There’s silence.

“Where are you, ‘Toru?”

“The morgue.”

“Shoko?”

“On her way in.”

“I can’t leave the boys.”

“I’ll be home soon.”

“I love you.”

He hangs up the phone. Nothing more needs to be said. These feelings are sadly all too familiar to you both. You realise Shoko will have to do the autopsy.

She delivered Akio 4 months ago. Now she’d be cutting up the corpse of the boy who waited outside of the labour ward for 16 hours.

You lean your head back – closing your eyes. Flashes of a pink head tossing back in laughter and strong arms hugging you in thanks, of meatballs served to you as you nurse your newborn and the Spider-Man lamp being plugged in making you smile at the giddy teenager. The faces change, now they’re old and wrinkled and whisper words with serpentine tongues laced with deceit and heartlessness in their actions. They knew what they were doing. Satoru wasn’t in Osaka for no reason. They knew.

They all fucking knew.

They sent him to his death, knowingly and intentionally. They sent three children into a trap all because they are scared. Cowards who hide behind words of ‘the good of society’ and the guise of ‘the greater good’. Satoru and you had screamed and pushed and threatened to stay the execution, but they found a loophole anyway.

They risked Megumi and Nobara – did they think you wouldn’t piece together the big picture? Did they think that you wouldn’t realise?

You don’t know how long you sat there but your phone buzzed again.

📲Satoruuuuu is Calling… ✅⛔️

You pick up.

“He’s alive.”

“What?”

“He’s alive. Yuuji’s alive. Sukuna woke him up…” There are so many tones in his voice and so many thoughts in your head you have to close your eyes.

“Are you sure?”

“Well - he’s talking and walking so unless The Last of Us was accurate then…” he attempts a joke – relief clear in his voice.

You softly lift the head from your lap, and place it on the navy pillow. He doesn’t stir.

You walk out into your room, sitting on the balcony – the air was what you needed.

“I don’t know what to say.” That is all you can manage.

The torrent of emotions your mind went through was making you so dizzy you sat on the wooden chair looking at the sky.

“He’s not safe here, they’re going to come for him.” Satoru’s voice comes, quiet through the phone.

“What will we do?” You say.

“He needs time, he needs to train and learn to manipulate and use his cursed energy. If he can protect himself…” Satoru begins.

“We need to hide him. He can’t stay at school or come here.” Your sorcerer’s brain was switched on now.

“I can’t bring him to the Gojo estate either, the elders the family visit too much.” He speaks.

Lightbulb.

“They visit your family… but they’d never think to visit mine. Satoru, bring him to my mom’s. I’ll call her, you can train him there every day, and if we’re being watched it’s not suspicious to visit our own family. She’ll take care of him.” You say, you knew that your family would protect this boy with their lives, he was family to Megumi, family to you.

“Y/N… we can’t tell anyone. The only people who know are me, you, Shoko and Ijichi.” He says, and your heart stops.

You’ll have to lie to Megumi.

“Fuck. It’s too dangerous for him to know – if they catch wind of this, and they find out he knows…” you say.

“He’ll be branded a traitor. Who knows what they’d do for information.”

“He’s going to hate us.”

“He’ll understand. He’s a smart kid.”

“Come home to me, to us – ‘toru. Bring him to my parents and then please come home.” You whisper to him.

He agrees and tells you he loves you.

The weeks fly by as you feel yourself crumbling from the weight of the sadness spilling from your son, Kugisaki isn’t much better and Satoru is still reeling from the elder’s deceit. You stormed to the council meeting the following day and threatened to burn the place to the ground if they so much as considered harming a hair on the head of the other kids.

“Unfortunate circumstances occur on missions. Nobody knows the outcome of these situations.” They fought.

“Oh – you knew the outcome of this one. You knew full well. All of you, every single one of you knew and you allowed it. In legal terms, that’s murder. You’re all sociopaths and whatever awaits you in the next world, I hope it hurts even a fraction of the pain you’ve all caused. Endanger my family again, and I’ll deal with you all personally – never mind Satoru.”

The training was going well – you had gone to your mother’s house two days after his resurrection, after the water cooled and you were sure you weren’t being surveilled.

You had run to Yuuji, running your eyes and hands over every bit of him, checking for wounds and crying into his shoulder. He had died, and somehow you were being comforted by him.

Satoru and you explained the situation, taking turns to train with him. They came up with a ridiculous idea of Yuuji playing Jack in the Box at the exchange event all you could do was allow it.

Back home – you explained to Megumi that the mission had been a nefarious plot concocted by the elders and higher ups to get rid of Yuuji, since you and your husband kept getting in the way – they took the opportunity of your maternity leave to send Gojo to Osaka and place the kids in the path of a Special Grade Curse. You hoped being armed with this information would help him understand why you and Satoru had lied to him, and allowed him to grieve. It hurt you, but his safety was paramount.

When the day came and Yuuji was released, you stood beside Megumi as he and Nobara watched him return from the dead. Jaws hanging open, they couldn’t tear their eyes from their friend.

Reunions and rejoicing complete, you and Satoru pulled Megumi by the sleeve away from the scene, into your classroom.

When the door shut, you began to sob.

“‘Gumi, I’m so sorry. We didn’t have any choice but to keep it a secret. It –” Satoru wraps you into his chest.

“We had to keep it secret, because they would have killed anyone involved if they found out, kiddo. We had to keep you safe.” He says hand on Megumi’s shoulder and a crying wife clinging to him.

“It’s okay.” Megumi shrugs.

You freeze, you thought he’d never forgive you.

“What?” You and Satoru say in unison.

“I get why you did it. Thank you, guys, – for helping him, and uh – for protecting us all.” He says and God this boy will never fail to amaze you. His maturity was something you and Satoru could only have dreamed of at his age and even rarer was hearing such genuine praise from him – he was softer with you, but this was directed to you both.

Wordlessly, you and Satoru wrapped him in your arms and he begrudgingly and awkwardly reciprocated the affection.

Over his head, you looked at your husband. His crystalline eyes filled with relief and love for you and your patchwork family, and you pressed a soft kiss to his lips – a silent thank you for everything you do. The road was never easy, but God was it worth it.

TAGLIST: @vesta-ro @lilithlunas @mialexandruh @sassy-cat-in-town @madam-ri @cjm-cookiethief

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