#Face-off Jimin | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

curio-queries · 8 months

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FACE, LETTER, & CLOSER THAN THIS

Disclaimer: The following post is full of my own opinions and interpretations. I do not share this with the intent to convince anyone else that this meaning upholds for all. My interpretations are also limited to English and that is an important distinction to make when accessing art from another language and culture. There are absolutely intentions and meanings that won't translate. Art is beautifully subjective, and I hope you all find your own reasons to love Jimin's music.

This is quite a lengthy post. Thank you to anyone who reads. I'd love to hear your thoughts as well, so don't feel shy to share! 💜

So FACE has been out for nearly a year, why am I making this post now? Honestly, it's all because of Closer Than This and the few nuggets we can glean from the music video. The very first clip of the mv is of Jimin's team discussing the lyrics and then Jimin's recording session. Honestly, I was quite surprised CTT was written at the same time as all of the FACE songs.

So the question then rises: Why wasn't CTT included in FACE? The answer I've arrived at is because CTT is not part of the journey Jimin was describing with FACE. More on CTT below but first, we need to revisit FACE:

TIMELINE

(US dates - I have to do too much timezone manipulation in my job, I'm not spending the time here):

30 DEC 2018 : Promise Release on SoundCloud

21 FEB 2023 : FACE announcement

16 MAR 2023 : Set Me Free pt.2 Release

23 MAR 2023 : FACE Release

22 DEC 2023 : Closer Than This Release

And here's the FACE schedule:

MOTTO-THEME-GUIDE

These phrases are ALL OVER the FACE project! They're in the digital media that was released, on pretty much every side of the physical albums, on the back of the photocards and postcards... They're pretty much on everything official connected to FACE. They're not just fluff included to fill up space; these words have MEANING in this project. I've been using these phrases as guide posts to help me interpret some of the meanings behind FACE recently, and I would encourage anyone interested in Jimin's deeper message to do the same. I've highlighted my references below.

Circles of Resonance Reflection of vulnerable minds and unexposed wounds. An echo, tremor and small movement to reach you. Face of facing the deepest part of inner-self. Face, the reflection of myself in an unfamiliar appearance. Waves originated from the deepest invisible inner world, pass through the face on the surface and reach others to resonate while transmitting the inner voice. Waves spread beautifully, finding its own flow despite wounds and distortions from a smallest scratch. The face of unwavering effort despite repeated falls and pain.

When asked what the album was about, Jimin freely shares that it relates to the events during the pandemic...and then the conversation usually moves on without any deeper discussion. This interview is probably the most verbose Jimin was any time he described the meaning behind FACE. If you haven't watched it recently, I highly recommend it.

youtube

We know that Jimin rarely shares the problems he's having whilst he's going through them (with us at least). He always waits until after he's moved on so that he can tell us not to worry, that it's in the past. (This concept comes up again in this post so keep it in mind.)

The distinction that I think is important to make is that, yes, FACE is about the pandemic, but it's not a straightforward diary of events. It's about how those events affected him. How the waves caused by the pandemic RESONATE, ECHO, and TREMOR through him - effecting the UNEXPOSED WOUNDS. Jimin found something in himself through this experience and had no choice but to FACE it. There were no distractions anymore, no pushing it to the side to deal with later. And he was able to share that journey with us in such a tragically beautiful way.

THE TRACKS

I made the below gifs for each track but I think they look best as a set without the tags so you can get the full effect of the differing ripples. Check out this post to see what I mean. ☺️

FACE-OFF

I know everyone likes to meme about Face-Off and trying to find who hurt Jimin to make them pay...but I really don't associate Face-Off with an external person. You can betray yourself in much worse ways than anyone else can because you know exactly all of your own weaknesses. You know exactly what pretty lies to tell yourself. And honestly, the source of the event doesn't really matter in the context of FACE. I view Face-Off as the initial incident. The SMALLEST SCRATCH that pushes the waves to spread.

There's also a lovely bit of foreshadowing with the lyric "Like crazy, everyone shout out, yeah yeah". CIRCLES OF RESONANCE. Not singular, multiple; we are in for a bumpy ride.

INTERLUDE : DIVE

I admit, I only listen to this track when I'm doing a full album listen. I love instrumental tracks but this isn't instrumental to me, it's sound effects. And I just personally have a sensory issue that comes out to play here BUT it's important to include in our discussion so don't skip it when you're trying to delve into the meanings!

The message I glean here is just how pervasive the issue is becoming. Jimin can be going about his life, trying to disregard it but the UNEXPOSED WOUNDS are there lurking underneath it all.

The pretty music overlaying the track may sound like glitz and glam, but this is just the beginning of the WAVES SPREADING BEAUTIFULLY, FINDING ITS OWN FLOW DESPITE WOUNDS AND DISTORTIONS...

LIKE CRAZY

I've been promising a post on Like Crazy for ages and this may be the closest I get to it. Let me know if any of you are interested in a more in-depth discussion on how the movie and the song work together. My short summary for both is this: there are moments when you willfully take actions that you KNOW are against your best interest. Not in a fleeting eats-too-many-cookies way. In a I-know-putting-my-hand-on-the-stove-and-turning-it-on-will-burn-me way.

I hope none of you experience this to such a damning extent. I have. Despite being the kind of person who I thought would never venture down such a path. It's not something I wish upon anyone. This is the WAVES ORIGINATED FROM THE DEEPEST INVISIBLE INNER WORLD, PASS THROUGH THE FACE ON THE SURFACE...

ALONE

Have you ever repeated a word enough that it starts to sound bizzare? What if you got the point where you thought the weird sound was reality? And then you were confronted with the truth. This song is that point. Where you are left with the sober understanding of yourself. FACE, THE REFLECTION OF MYSELF IN AN UNFAMILIAR APPEARANCE.

SET ME FREE pt.2

The rise! Jimin was able to find a way to push himself beyond the betrayal of himself. It absolutely wasn't easy and there were setbacks, but this is a clear call to any who find themselves in similar circumstances: you CAN overcome. THE FACE OF UNWAVERING EFFORT DESPITE REPEATED FALLS AND PAIN.

Remember when I said earlier that Jimin only tells us about his struggle once it's over? I honestly believe that's why SMF was the pre-release track. He needed us to know that there was a happy ending before he would tell us about the pain he went through.

LIKE CRAZY (English Version)

As I mentioned my sensory issue above, I cannot talk about Like Crazy without mentioning the whispered English at the beginning/end. I HATE it sooooo much! It just twigs my brain in all the wrong ways. It's a huge part of why it took me a long time to appreciate LC. As much as I hate it though, it's absolutely necessary for the interpretation of LC. It firmly gives us a landmark into where and how the song relates to the movie. It also creates a bookend structure that gives the original and the English versions their own rightful places to exist.

LETTER

My very first post on this blog was a simple comparison of the lyrics in Like Crazy from the translation on the original music video to the english version. There is absolutely a difference here and I think it's a very important distinction that there are two versions of Like Crazy in the album. One is AN ECHO, TREMOR AND SMALL MOVEMENT TO REACH YOU. This phrase is for us, the audience. None of the other phrases use "you". Even though Jimin has set himself free, there are still CIRCLES RESONATING.

If you have seen any of my posts prior to this, you likely know how obsessed with Letter I am. I have the hardest time naming anything as a favorite (even favorite colour, there's just sooo many good uses of different colors) so I hope you understand how revolutionary it is for me to unequivocally state that Letter is my favorite song. Like ever. For all of my (cough*decades*cough) of music-listening, opinion-having life. Letter is THE ONE. Letter is it. I probably have stronger feelings about Letter than any relationship I've been in (but I'm aspec so take that with a grain of salt...)

I listen to Letter A LOT (sometimes on literal repeat - there's a video on YouTube that loops it for over an hour and I've definitely contributed several of those listens) and while working on this post, I would still get emotional hearing it at the end of FACE. This song is the absolute definition of the beauty that can only truly be understood after utter tragedy.

To me, Letter is about how this experience has effected Jimin to the point where there's a noticeable difference in the way he interacts with and appreciates those he loves, in all interpretations of the word love. WAVES...REACH OTHERS TO RESONATE WHILE TRANSMITTING THE INNER VOICE.

I am not using this post to debate the merits of exactly who Letter is for: a significant other, ARMY, or Jimin himself. Frankly, I don't think it matters to the meaning of the song. Use whatever flavour most appeals to you. That's the real genius and gift of Jimin's music imo. He creates it in such a way that we can fold it around our own personal stories and needs.

WHAT WAS THIS POST ABOUT AGAIN?

Right, so rewind to the release of Closer Than This. I'd had very little sleep as I traveled for the holidays and was absolutely feeling the timezone difference. But I stayed up to hear Jimin's new song. I listened to it first in Spotify and thought it sounded like a beautiful, happy, well-produced gift of a song - perfect for the end of the year and to comfort us with his departure for military service. Then I watched the mv to read the subtitles... Y'all, I absolutely was NOT expecting to see clips from the time covered in Jimin's Production Diary! I wouldn't have been surprised if it was the same team that Jimin worked with before but at a later time - he trusts them artisically after all. BUT these clips were the same angles and same conversations we saw from the development of FACE.

So I started my due diligence. Is it possible CTT was supposed to be part of FACE but they held it specifically to release when it did? I listened to FACE multiple times trying to insert CTT into the narrative. And it just doesn't fit this journey...at all. Like not in the slightest. I thought maybe immediately after Letter or even replacing Letter but no. I even tried inserting Promise as a bridge and it just doesn't work in the context of FACE.

CTT has a pretty literal storytelling narrative. It describes the journey WE have been on with Jimin. It lists his promises to US going forward. The music video being an album of memories, supports the nostalgic and loving viewpoint of the song. It has absolutely nothing to do with how Jimin was affected by the events of the pandemic or anything he found inside himself because of it.

Both songs have been described by Jimin as a 'fan song' and as I described in this post, there are many reasons that support both of them falling into this categorization. To me, Letter is more about Jimin having a deep intimate conversation with us because he trusts us. While CTT is literally about the relationship between ARMY and Jimin.

Anyway, I think that's all I've got to say about it for now. What are your thoughts? Should Closer Than This have been included in FACE? Was it just a marketing ploy to keep generating our interest after Jimin left?

(BTW I'm really happy with those FACE gifs and how the ripples look when they're together. They took some time to figure out. I just wish I had some better software to turn them into gifs so the colours display better, but alas, beggars can't be choosers. They look really great in the ppt that I made them in but I guess that's just for me to enjoy!)

#park jimin #jimin #FACE #Face-off #Interlude: Dive #like crazy #alone #set me free pt.2 #like crazy (english)#Letter #closer than this

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jmdbjk · 2 years

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Oh, Jimin...

These are my personal impressions, thoughts, interpretations and opinions on Jimin’s solo FACE album. Some of the things I say here are built on things I know from past original content, interviews and what Jimin has shared personally. Some of it is just me reveling in my first experience with Jimin’s long awaited album.

It is such a serious album. Jimin said this is the story of what he was feeling, chronologically, 2020-2022, during the pandemic era. At the beginning of 2020, BTS was rising higher than any Korean artist ever had before and then all of a sudden the momentum came to a halt, and there was nothing. Having the life you’ve known suddenly jerked away from you is traumatizing.

Once the king of social media, Jimin almost ceased by the end of 2020 and never went back. “Oh, he just outgrew it.” No, the man was struggling with his issues and not only did he not need to see the extra crap spewed all over social media but he had nothing left to give, nothing left inside.

I noticed how Jimin looked physically back in 2020. He was downright frail y’all. The man was trying to give us what we wanted at the expense of his mental and physical health. That breakdown he had during the ending ments in Memories 2020 was too much. They were all stressed out, but Jimin... those that said he was being over dramatic... the man was struggling with his mental health.

I wrote this last June, 2022 but never posted it:

After Memories 2020 dropped, we’ve heard Jimin say he struggled after everything got canceled. Days upon days that turned into months upon months and more than two years passed before they finally returned to in-person performances. He stated that during isolation and lockdowns he wondered what was the purpose of his life, or that he had lost his purpose.

Jimin’s struggles were most likely much more severe than he let on and he 100% kept it to himself because he didn’t want us to worry about him. That sounded like solo delusional projection but think about Jimin and how he’s behaved in the past...always telling us not to worry. Always saying things to reassure us that he’s happy, he eats well, don’t worry.

There was no working, no performing, their lives and his life changed drastically overnight just like all of ours did. Would we ever get back to normal? What will happen in the future? When will all of this end?

Face-Off

The album opens with a carnival calliope, it was a little jarring and unexpected. The images it conjured in my brain as the notes played were of a worn out circus winding down. It made me think of the big wild circus that WAS his life, and it just wound down and keeled over.

Knowing the premise of the album, I think the title, Face-Off, implies Jimin is looking at himself. Speaking to himself. The lyrics could also imply he is speaking to someone else, like people he once trusted. But I don’t think so.

He was having a confrontation with himself. Reasoning and bargaining with himself.

Maybe he once trusted himself but in this time and place in which he finds himself, he questions what is he doing? and second guessing himself. Day in and day out, the days are all the same nothingness. Hiding his feelings, faking it, pretending it was all ok. It’s all cool. It’ll be all right. He has said many times he looks back at that time and thinks he could have done more for the fans. Being hard on himself. His own worst critic.

And then this enters the picture: using alcohol to self-medicate. Getting drunk. Numbing the pain. Forgetting. Drink all night. Oh, Jimin...

We know he has a very high alcohol tolerance. He once mentioned that he used to drink a lot. When he declined the champagne during the live after the Busan concert, we all made jokes about it and moved on. Oh, Jimin.

Face-Off feels like it could have been a purging song when he wrote it. A little primal, you know... just scream, get it out. Painful but cathartic.

This is the lyric that was scary: “tonight is a beautiful night, I think I’m close (or I think I have it all/I think I’ve found myself)” were chilling to me because they did not come across as optimistic, they came across as being at the end of one’s rope after becoming a shell of a person. He follows that line with “tonight I don’t want to be sober.” Oh, Jimin.

His vocals open very low and moody then transition to a plaintive cry, punctuated with anger.

Pour it down, pour it out... the anger, the emotions, the words, just pour it out.

Interlude: Dive

Like the calliope that sadly wound down, Dive opens with the melody slowly winding back up to speed. Another day starting. Someone knocks, voices, the ambience of a normal day, breathing, running footsteps. The crowd cheering and Jimin’s voice during his ending ments at the Busan concert, more sounds of people in his life. We hear Jimin’s footsteps trudging, it sounds like we hear him climbing steps, entering his house, closing the door, and first thing he does when he is alone in the quiet is pour a drink and drinking deeply. I am concerned.

Maybe it is supposed to represent the closing of Chapter 1, about a day in the past that was once a “normal” day, since it included the last things he said during that concert.

The music track is dreamlike, repetitive. Living in a dream. Every day. Same thing. Go home. Drink. Do it again. Dive means go deep. In deep. He’s in deep.

There is a very subtle line between drinking in order to make it through another day/night versus drinking to relax and wind down. A slippery slope to walk on every single day.

We’ve transitioned from the world changing overnight to living in a daze trying to pretend everything is ok. Coping.

Like Crazy

(I am going to express my thoughts using the English version of the song.)

Jimin has explained the song is influenced by the movie of the same name.

I have learned that the dialogue from the movie was NOT original to the movie but hired voice actors specifically for the song: “I think we can last forever.” “I’m afraid that everything will disappear.” “Just trust me.” And at the end: “How long again?” “What’s the point?”

He has said the dialogue that was used fit the message of the song. I have not seen the movie. I don’t think the song is a literal interpretation of the movie. I think the song’s basic concept is the emotional struggle trying to maintain a dream. But maintaining a dream is unrealistic no matter what you do to try to make it last. Jimin had to come to terms with that.

Jimin’s vocals begin very light and airy, very dreamy.

[God, he’s fine.]

The vibe of the song is sort of retro, very much evokes the artist, The Weeknd. It has a very 80′s synth beat. It is a very danceable song. Like I said, on the surface.... very dreamy.

Vocals transition and it still seems like he’s having a conversation with himself, or with a voice within himself. A voice telling him to “trust me, follow me... I will make it good for you.” Me: gives a side eye to that voice in Jimin’s head because now I know it’s not trustworthy. “I’ll take the pressure off, been reaching for the stars.” Chasing that high. Go easy, Jimin. Please be careful.

Yes, the lyrics are also very sexy... “give me a good ride,” and “Let me have a taste.” Yep, I’m with ya on all that... ahem...

[Wow]

[side note: I love the make up in the bathroom scene with that stroke of silver under his eye.]

“All my reflections, I can’t even recognize.” ...what he sees of himself is not reality. He doesn’t recognize himself. Don’t try to save me. I want to stay like this.

To me, the mud on the floor, the mud flowing down the walls, the mud on the hand that grabs his wrist at the beginning of the song, the mud on his hand at the end... could represent his perceived imperfections, flawed, therefore dirty: his struggle to cope, his less than perfect thoughts... substance abuse... the struggle that he needs to be perfect on the outside or the attempt to appear perfect on the outside but there’s all this dirt on the inside that he can’t hide any longer.....the huge pile of mud at his feet is out of place in the otherwise normal room of his life. Becoming overwhelming for him.

Some of the visuals of this song are, to put it bluntly, very, not heterosexual. Again, these are just my impressions and opinions. But a friend pointed out the photo on the front of his pants and I went looking for information about the art photographer, Robert Mapplethorpe. He was heavily involved in New York’s gay BDSM scene. Some of the things written about him:

“In a rapidly changing society, he fearlessly confronted taboos surrounding gender, sexuality and mortality, seeking to instill beauty and dignity into subjects that lay outside accepted social norms.”

“... a man who consistently brought his audience face to face with the unknown and the unseen.”

The song ends with him reaching toward the camera to smear it with the mud to hide his imperfect self. When Jimin puts his face in front of the camera, he doesn’t want us to see his imperfections. He wants to be as perfect as he can, he says it all the time, he wants to look pretty for us, but I hope he has realized we accept him as a real human being even with his very human imperfections.

Alone

The alarm clock goes off...yet another day...doesn’t trust the people even if they are nice to him...he’s lost...day in day out... passing out drunk and not remembering...what am I doing? am I the only one feeling like this? Alone, pretending to be ok...every day the same...how much more until I can go back to before? Feeling more and more isolated within his own mind, pretending to be ok but losing himself every day. Mayday. The cry for help. Telling himself it will be all right (we all told ourselves this back then). The small nagging voice that doesn’t believe it.

Realizing you’ve changed and you are never going back to the way you were before.

Not gonna lie, that line right there broke my heart. Gives new meaning to Set Me Free Pt. 2′s line: "raise your hands for the past me.”

He was in so much trouble and no one knew. He reassured us over and over that he was fine. Not to be over-dramatic but I don’t want to think about how close he was... I have seen a few people say this song really resonated with them. It is a very powerful cry for help.

Jimin’s vocals blew me away. The vocals start out very subdued, almost beaten down. His vocal fry squeezes my heart. He ends crying out “what do I have to do to end this darkness?” Bad twilight. Night’s can be hard.

Set Me Free Pt. 2

From my post on March 17, 2023:

Going insane to stay sane. Raise your hands for the past me. Now set me free. This is where I literally cried. Oh, Jimin.

Going crazy trying to fake being ok.

Now I know this song is about him saving himself, setting himself free from this prison he was in, the depression, breaking the chains of alcohol dependency, of telling the naysayers out there and his own internal naysayer to go fuck themselves, Park Jimin is back. Strong and beautiful and fierce. The light of the moon shining on us.

We know he still considers soju his joy. He sounds like he’s taken control, not totally abstaining, but in control. I only wish the rest of his days are happiness and stable mental health well-being.

Letter

So unexpected. I was in shock. My heart floated away.

People talk about how Jimin’s album has no collabs on it, unlike the previous member’s solo work. My opinion is, when you are sharing deeply intimate feelings and emotions and struggles about yourself you don’t want or need other people/voices on your song. It’s not appropriate.

The only exception to this was… Jungkook…not exactly a collab, but he’s there. The other songs used background vocalists who are not members of BTS.

This song was hidden. Yes, there have been other hidden songs. But come on...

Letter has a strong stroke of Promise in the “oh, oh.” And when Jungkook starts singing it is like the world is set right because those two voices blend like nothing else I’ve ever heard. And he comes in in the middle of the song gently supporting Jimin’s vocals. But unmistakably Jungkook. I know it’s up to interpretation, but for me, the lyrics from then on take on something a little extra in meaning with Jungkook there singing with Jimin.

You held your hand out to me and now I will hold on to you. So simple and beautiful. The sounds of the surf remind me of the song “Okinawa” that Jimin posted once. Which also reminds me of their pics at Santa Monica beach...

Letter seems to be an actual letter. When the members told him to write it down, put it in a song, maybe Jimin’s first impulse was to write it as if it was a letter. The lyrics are simple and very to the point and convey:

“...though I’m not good with words, I want to sincerely say let’s make each other happier. You who showed me I am bigger than my small self. You've been by my side and I will be by yours. I hope we stay together until the cold winter. Though the future is unknown and scary, let’s stay together. Never forget we’re together.”

There are references to past songs: Sea, Spring Day. Both of those songs were from 2017.

But Jungkook. On a Jimin song. That was hidden. Clever. That we had no idea about...even though Kookie knocked us over the head with it when he played the guitar for us, making sure we knew he’d only had one lesson. Who do you think gave him that first guitar lesson? Jimin... and Kookie blurting out some English in his last live... who do you think he’s been practicing English with? Duh, Jimin.

It was a hidden song AND the credits were hidden on the page in the book. They were printed in varnish only, which is basically shiny, clear ink.

You know what I think? Jungkook knew about this song since Festa dinner. The teasing about not being offered the chance to listen to the song. That little shit. I KNOW IT WAS THIS SONG!! I JUST KNOW IT!! This was the rumored subunit. Or at least one of them. I guess we’ll eventually see if there are any more between the others.

They sound so beautiful together. I love them. And as I keep saying, they are fine… they’ve been fine.

Last words...

Anyway, that was a lot of words. Maybe I got too deep. Jimin explained himself about how the album originated.

As I was telling my friend earlier...everything in this album has peeled a layer, or several layers, away from EVERYTHING I've seen and heard from Jimin and the group since 2020. I had written some things in the past, like last June and even before that, about how Jimin seemed not well mentally. Things that I had no business saying in public because who the hell am I to think I can say something like that about someone I have never met? So I never posted those words. I never thought I would be so close to the mark in thinking those things. He’s been through it, wrote songs about it, and moved on. And I am so proud of him and this album.

#jimin face #face-off #like crazy #i'm so proud of jimin #if they were trying to quash any ships this was not the way to go about it #i said that after hickey-gate too #also jikook #did i mention i am so proud of jimin?#and kookie is so funny

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