#Fucking Facebook

[lookninjas]

Blows my mind to see people saying shit like “Well, maybe Iggy Pop should try wearing a shirt!” or  “Maybe Robert Smith’s too old for wearing lipstick!”  Maybe you should stop expecting the nonconformist heroes of your youth to suddenly turn Normal just because that’s what you did because you felt like you had to and now you’re second-guessing your life and your choices.  Maybe you should try that.

[publiccollectors]

[Apologies to On Kawara] 

Sometime yesterday, March 17, 2024, someone hacked my Facebook account, connected it to their Instagram account, and was promptly caught by Mark Zuckerberg himself probably (such a hero) and my account was disabled. Thus far I have not been able to re-able my account and it is locked. There is nothing to see here (there). Facebook’s instructions don’t work and they haven’t invited me to rejoin the party. I’m trying not to feel hurt. 

So many thoughts have crossed my mind. I could create a new account but—and this is such a weird thing to think about—I would never be able to reconnect with my Facebook friends that are dead to see how their old posts are doing. 

About 14 years of posts are just gone, I guess? I could start a new account (maybe, if I’m allowed) and feel like Rock Hudson in the creepy movie Seconds, starting a whole new life (except with probably a lot of the same friends all over again and the same job and stuff, so maybe that's not a good comparison). 

I made entire publications of my Facebook posts, and the posts of others that I collaborated with. It could be a very productive space for me, and a lot of new friendships sprouted from being on that platform. A lot of old friendships became deeper too. I wrote and posted a lot. It was mostly a very positive place in my experience. Being on Facebook generated a lot of creative opportunities. It has also destroyed a lot of people and countries and attention spans. I'm sure I read fewer books because of it. It has come with a price.

When Facebook started and all of my friends were signing up and talking about it, I waited. I hesitated to join because I was afraid that I would like it too much, and I would lose a lot of time using it. I eventually joined and quickly found out that I was correct. There are many people on that platform that I have not met in person but interact with online all the time, and have only known through email and social media for multiple decades. In many cases I don’t know any other way to get ahold of them. If I choose not to start a new account or can’t get my old one back, I will miss my interactions with those friends. 

Multiple times over the years people have told me that they enjoyed my posts so much that I was the only reason they stayed on Facebook. That’s a lovely compliment (that I mostly don’t believe). Now that my account is gone, I assume they will all leave the platform en masse. 

In the meantime, I suspect that my productivity will soar, at a time when I have multiple creative projects that demand a lot of attention. So for now, I am here and I am still alive. Feel free to message me, or email me at: marc [at] publiccollectors [dot] org. I love you. It’s been facetastic. 

[interstellar-lamb]

Me *has an entire facebook feed full of werewolf porn stories*

Me *tries to hide, block, report ads an hour straight*

Facebook feed: *coughs up more werewolf porn*

Me: *reports bug to facebook*

Facebook feed, half an hour later: would you like this post about evangelical christianity to go with your werewolf porn

[keltaithecrafty]

Why the fuck did I, a grown ass person, not have the brains to stay off the Book of Face, or if I could not, under no circumstances read the comments?

I'm going to need at least an hour of brain fluff before I sleep or I'll wake up feeling like I tried to bite through a bank vault.

[gaykarstaagforever]

...I don't know who you are as a person if your response to Twitter dying is "Oh thank god, Facebook has just created an equivalent!"

40 year old white men with Zoom jobs are going through some shit right now.

[shochmonster]

I just need to vent somewhere, but boy is the internet exhausting sometimes. I joined a Facebook community for something I like a lot, and all the moderator does is berate the community for this, that and the other thing. I joined and remain in the group because I wanted to talk to other people about THE THING I LIKE, but the moderator makes me feel icky. She and her friends have spent the last hour telling me how wrong I am for wanting more focused content.

[hobohobgoblim]

So I'm old and still have a FB account, on which I posted "Happy Ides, go out and stab a tyrant" which was blocked by FB for like 4 minutes because of "community standards". A friend replied with "wasn't that yesterday?" To which I replied "happy second of Ides! Go out and stab ANOTHER tyrant." At which point I got FB banned for the SAME FÖKKING JOKE THEY JUST REVIEWED AND FOUND HARMLESS.

[alarrylarrie]

Hey.

If you live in the US, especially if you live in a state where abortion is now outlawed, especially ESPECIALLY if you’re a person with a uterus in a reproductive capable age:

Delete Facebook messenger. Or, at the very least please DO NOT discuss anything having to do with your healthcare, medication, your menstrual cycle, etc. etc. etc. on Facebook messenger, or really any social media platforms.

https://techcrunch.com/2022/08/09/facebook-helps-cops-prosecute-17-year-old-for-abortion/amp/

Stay safe out there y’all.

[just-absolutely-feral]

I'm in Facebook Jail for the fourth (4th) time this August. And I would be lying if I said it didn't feel like an obsurd achievement...

But now I'm curious who reported the "How to deal with a Narcissist" posts I've casually posted the past few days on there cause apparently they don't like it. Plus I wanna remove them as a friend, cause this is the funniest reason I've been in FB Jail aside from a "Whatta dick" comment that got me 30 days before appeal.

So uhm, hey Tumblr... Thanks for not being an asshole and banning me for tryna help other people. I promise to share my first post after 7 days...

[rincewind87]

[randomrosy]

[image ID: screen shot of Facebook “minion meme of the day” post dark text on a yellow background with one of those Facebook me-emojis in the bottom right corner, text reads“Oh i miss the good old days when you could post your opinion without offending somebody”]

See on a baseline this statement is agreeable, accept for the part where literally no one is stopping you from voicing your opinion Minion memes daily. If your opinion means that much and you’re willing to stand by it then people being “offended” shouldn’t matter. Block them, debate them, ignore them. The only reason you wouldn’t post your opinion for fear of people being offended is if you A) Know it is offensive and/Or B)Don’t want it linked back to you

In any case people have gotten way to comfortable posting every thought and opinion that crosses their mind, some thoughts should be inside thoughts.

[eatwriteruncraftrepeat]

Tell friends don't just talk to you when you're struggling.

[thesoftboiledegg]

[phantomrose96]

It always surprises me how many deactivated users there are here. And maybe most of them are the natural consequence of URL-hopping, but beyond those, the ones that intentionally deactivated--just the idea of actively deciding to terminate an account is so foreign to me.

I'm in the business of atrophy.

My Neopets exist, and persist, and are dying and continue to die for the last ten years my account has been dark. My penguin lived until the day Club Penguin died, immobile in its igloo, decoration among the puffles. My Webkinz stand in rooms which time refuses to allow even the dignity of gathering dust. My footprint stuffs the digital shelves of datacenters for sites and accounts I do not remember making.

I've made a horde of scattered exoskeletons, shells which I cannot even call ghosts because that implies a presence. They are husks. They are archives. They are records. I do not ever consider the mercy of allowing them to die.

[leggywormy]

Has this been done yet

[thebibliosphere]

Hey, if you’re gonna take the time to reblog and tag my stuff as “munchie” (a derogatory shorthand for Münchausen syndrome favored by redditors) and a whole slew of other horrible stuff, maybe don’t do it on a blog where you post full face selfies that can easily be reverse image searched back to your Facebook where it reveals you are a nurse :)