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#GOD im spiraling a little
quillkiller · 1 year
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cannot believe ”dating” includes having to share bits and pieces of yourself. absolutely sick and twisted
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uniquezombiedestiny · 5 months
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"your other fragments went off to see a new galaxy. i bet they've turned into a big, beautiful comet by now."
"you think so?"
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different text placement + no text versions :)
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akalikai · 7 months
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Gonna christen this account with a doorkeay colored sketch from Twitter (yeah its magnet bc I'm fucking cringe and a vocaloid nerd shhh)
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I just love the idea of gerry calling michael those cheesy nicknames like "sunshine" "pretty boy" "blondie" "curls"
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greasydumbfuck · 1 month
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rotating stardew frank in my brain
#frank castle#been thinking about him in relation to the stardew characters#i think sam and vincent are reminded of their dad which is a bit uh oh but when kent comes back it gets better. two dads now#alex gets weirdly competitive with him about sports and exercise in general but then i imagine they could watch gridball together sometimes#penny........ i think penny would be equally spooked and fascinated by him. hes big and scary but also helps around town. kind to an extent#she sees him interacting with the kids once and shes like oh...... waow........#frank does not acknowledge that fascination in any form and eventually it fizzles out and she ends up just respecting him as a person#elliott and him could bond over literature a little bit i think. maybe#jas is deffo scared of him at first moreso than of the regular farmer. i also imagine shed be the first to see the soft side of him#her and vincent yk cuz theyre kids. and we all know how frank is with kids. god im sorry im spiraling this guys such a dad at heart still#who else do i have in mind. him and sebastian nod at each other in acknowledgement when passing byand sebastian thinks frank is cool as hel#him and kent get along great of course they bond over being traumatized by war and frank makes sure kent appreciates his wife and kids#hm. all i have i think. might be wrong or unpolished but yk its just rattling in my skull#sorry ive been playing stardew and thinking about frank all day and nothing else. and then i ate so much pasta i almost threw up
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sophiethewitch1 · 5 months
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kinda wanna write a fic where the dog is literally the deus ex machina
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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The thing about bbc merlin is that the dynamic that's set up between merlin and arthur is so fucking good that I can't even. What can I possibly draw that's gonna encapsulate the feelings between them?
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leafuxxtea · 6 months
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god the announcement of hnk (houseki no kuni/land of the lustrous) has got me in shambles,,, i haven't read the chapters after the 10 000 years hiatus so i gotta catch up (actually I'll probably re-read the whole thing)
‼️rambling incoming‼️
imo, hnk is one of the best series for deep psychological analysis,,, it had such a deep impact on me when i first read it (like 3 years ago) and still remains in my top best/favorites series 🥹🥹 i could ramble abt it for so long,,, the process of one losing bit by bit the parts of themselves and replacing it with something else (both physically and metaphorically) in an endless need to help others, but also as an own selfish wish to become better than who they used to be. Then looking back, and realizing things were so much simpler back then, and mourning that past self. (The fact that all of this revolves around their self-hatred and the belief that they're worthless is just. It's so heartbreaking to me. They've become so desperate for affirmation and yet still keeps getting hurt, by others and by themself too.)
i have too many feelings about the manga 😭😭 im losing myself to the brainrot, help-
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beancalzone · 4 months
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So that apple music top 100 albums list huh
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kyuala · 11 months
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SOOOOOO hard to go through everyday life trying to ignore the never-ending feeling that im just irreparably fucked up and therefore should just give up on everything
#this aint exactly s******* but it aint exactly not s******* either#anyways it gets even harder when i have to live under the same roof as my brother who is so much better than me in every single conceivable#and imaginable way possible like#and i knowwww a LOT of it comes down to us having relatively similar yet wildly different lives despite being 1.5y apart and having the sam#family our entire lives like he has gone through NOTHING and i mean not a single societal issue ive had to face and endure my entire life#he's a man im a woman. he's white im black. he's straight im gay. he's skinny ive always been 'overweight'. he's always been the good#christian kid ive always had issues w faith and religion. he's never been mentally ill i was clinically depressed for nearly 8yrs of my lif#we both lost the same parent and im the only one who got pathological grief and a personality disorder out of it. he's had a great job for#the last 7yrs that now pays him 20k+ every month ive only had 3 odd jobs my entire life and 2 of those my MOTHER had to give me so i would#have SOMETHING and ive never made over 1.6k monthly n my last job was minimum wage only#he's had like 4 relationships and is nearly engaged im so traumatized + emotionally unavailable ive only ever been on 1 date my entire life#he has a good relationship w every family member we have i have Issues w like half the family. he's always been an active member of our#church i can barely listen to like 4 traditional hymns before i start losing my mind and spiraling. i think the only two ways we're pretty#much equal like socially is that we're both able bodied cis and christians but still the cis and christian thing is debatable for previousl#stated reasons so like. do yall see how much better he is doing than me in every little last area in life and how he's always gotten the#long straw when it comes to Not having to deal w certain obstacles in life. n i know its like yea idk what it actually is like to be him an#he could not be doing all that well first of all shut up. second of all if it was 1 or 2 things i'd get it but it's literally EVERYTHING#and i know bc of said things n our v different lives it's unfair to me to compare the two of us but then it begs the question: WHY#WHY did i have to go through these things. WHY do i have to deal w this. WHY did i get the short straw literally every goddamn time#WHY did i have to get THIS life like WHYYYYY why ME GOD. why have I had to put up w all this bullshit for 24 fucking years!!!!!!!!! im TIRE#and this is not me hating or resenting him i know it's not his fault and he is so good to me#but still. why was i left with these things? to live like this?#so yes i guess i do envy him a little bit. who wouldn't#mari.txt#personal#tw negative#dl#btw i do NOT mean some identities are better than others. i mean he is better and is doing better than me in life partially bc he's never#had to deal w certain social issues and obstacles that come w oppressed identities.
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toytulini · 4 months
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wheres that post about how its hard to have like a fucking depression spiral or whatever while knitting bc lemme tell u im sitting here fighting back tears while actively crocheting and its not fucking working
#toy txt post#depression spiral self worth spiral the world sucks and everything is bad and stupid spiral#whatever you want to call it. im fucking miserable and my eyes keep watering and making it kinda hard to see the fucking stitches#guess thatd be less of an issue if i was doing a standard moss stitch instead if a modified variant w half doubles and working into the#stitch under the space instead of in the chain space which is a little more annoying and fiddly to find than the chain space#whatever. its all the same stupid fucking shit anyway. whatever whatever whatever whatever#nothing matters everything is stupid and sucks and whats the fucking point! god#and then dad will just get home and sternly scold me for not looking for a job anyway#as if i could currently fucking handle being asked what my fucking strengths are or whatever#and i bet fucking period is not fucking helping cos hormone fluctuations do weird shit to emotions i fucking guess. whatever#i feel like my head is going to explode#'just let yourself cry let it out!' no. its fucking inconvenient and doesnt even release all the stupid fucking feelings it just leaves me#exhausted and wasting a bunch of fucking tissues. whatever#im a stupid lazy bitch whatever and im Not. but i am#what does it matter#i cant even deal with the fucking ants in my bedroom im just hiding from them in my brothers empty room#i washed all my bedding but havent remade the bed bc im like oh i should wait for the ants to be gone#cant do anything. cant do fucking anything at all ever#i should get out of the house and touch grass and that would be good for me but like. where#i shouldnt even leave the house bc im not insured and what if i get into a car crash? i hate everything#negative#whining
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yutadori · 3 days
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sometimes you just need to hit your head against a wall at school and move on
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l0rd-0f-c0ws · 17 days
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I frequently feel completely isolated no matter how much I talk to people. So that's fun
#sorry if anyone sees these im tired of using my personal discord servet to vent. i always spiral too much#anyways i have an idea for a good poem to write for class because of recent events#ughhhh idk i just wish i wasnt so annoying about asking if i can open ip to people#or if someone would just ask if i was okay. i mean actually id probably lie i am not actually good at being open.#but like hey idk it feels nice to feel like people genuinely want to know#ughhhhfhfhf i do this to myself sometimes JSHSJSKDJDJD#welp its just how life goes. i feel lonely all the time and i soldier on#surely helping the next person will make me feel better! nope. surely helping yhis next person will make me feel better! nope. surely-#tgats me. thats what i sound like#yeah idk it feels like everyone is going through something worse than me so itd be a moral failing on my part#to ask them if i could just like. feel bad. noticeably#not even talk about it just look down and out of it for a day#yknow i emailed one of my teachers asking permission to go by a new preferred name#this is at like. a massive very queer and trans art school.#and i asked him permission to do this#and i was joking with my friends about how pathetic i sounded in it#and one of them patted me on the head and said “there there buddy” like very jokingly#but i almost cried because thats the first time in so long someone has like. really tried to comfort me#or shown me much physical affection#my mom gives me hugs and stuff but thats always about her. i dont blame her shes got a lot of stuff going on#but idk its really selfish of me but i just wanna have people see me and feel bad for me and it be about my pain for a little while#ill get over it im just being a teenager but shit god fucking damnit#i just want a break from feeling like my world is falling apart#then getting some footing#then it falling apart again#okay i feel a bit better now better stop the complain train JDJDJSKSJD#hey why do i never hear that it rhymes and everything thays so good#damn i gotta use that more#welp weve reached our stop sorry if anyone ever read thjs. hope you have a nice day tho lol
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allsnarker · 3 months
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feeling incredibly fragile rn
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glitterghost · 5 months
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It's a very emotional over bad omens kind of day.
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six-of-ravens · 5 months
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help my brain is doing that thing where it brings up something that an old friend said to make me angry in 2016...but then realizes this person actually had, for our whole relationship from like jr high through to young adulthood, a habit of being rude, condescending, or just plain mean. and also getting mad anytime someone told her "hey, that was mean" and refusing to apologize and....huh, i guess i shouldn't be surprised she eventually burned down our friendship by making fun of me for having a "marketing job" because it wasn't "cool" enough for her, the upper-middle-class kid whose parents paid her way through university and young adulthood so she literally never worked a day until she got her dream job...
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eosofspades · 6 months
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Question for you, on the subject of SPOP ships: would you have been okay with Glitradora (essentially the poly trio) being a thing, had Nate Stevenson decided he wanted to go that direction? I'm just curious as someone who loved how the Catradora arc was done in the show.
(And for the record, I understand your indifference towards both Korrasami and CaitVi--the latter will need some more seasons in the oven to really flourish, while the former is severely hampered by the constant executive interference Nickelodeon pulled on LOK during its original run.)
if glitradora were made canon i would have eaten my own face (/pos) my god the CONCEPT,,, the DRAMA,,, the DYNAMICS,,,,, that would have been my roman empire actually
also agree w everything you say here indifference is a great word for it. caitvi i actually see the potential in them i don't dislike the pairing it just rlly isn't compelling to me. i actually felt a little,,, weird about it? it felt like it came out of nowhere to me?? which i know isn't true but something about it just strikes me as Rushed idk (vi is still one of my favorite characters though)
as for korrasami i lowkey feel bad hating on it bc i KNOW how much the network screwed over the writers about it, but like,,, man i don't even see the potential in this one ahgakjsdas. i will admit though a big part of this is just the general writing of tlok i felt wasn't great so the character dynamics seem sorta weak to me. i AM glad for what they did for representation in kids' cartoons though and i'm glad ppl are having a good time shipping them. the fanart is gorgeous also
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