#I feel like I'd be a disaster as a roommate

[damnprecious]

apartment hunting be like 'that flat is in an inconvenient neighborhood, that building is right next to a massive construction site, that kitchen hasn't been updated since like the 70s and the stove looks like a fire hazard, this apartment has a super inconvenient layout, this hasn't got enough storage, a minimum one year contract...'

[violentdelightsandviolentends]

Pity Party.

Synopsis - Carmy just wants to see you treated the way he thinks you deserve. He decides to take matters into his own hands.

Pairing - Carmen Berzatto x Female Roommate Reader

Word Count - 3k

Warnings - smut. cursing. alcohol mention. carmys filthy mouth.

Age Rating - 18+

Author's Note - hello hello hello!! i am back!! i had a wonderful vacation soaking up the sun, and i am feeling refreshed and ready to go. i have had so many ideas over the past few weeks, so i'm excited to get some of them written asap!! this was a fic that came to me randomly, as i was thinking about roommate!carmen and how much of a menace he'd be if you ever talked about other guys. this was written as a part of my carmen roommates collection. it doesn't follow on from Finders, Keepers or Sweet Dreams, but it does exist in the same universe - so you can decide if this takes place before or after!! as always, feel free to send me any ideas or thoughts or burning desires you have. so much love <3

as always, reblogs, comments and feedback (even anonymous feedback) are immensely appreciated!! your reblogs are the only way to circulate my fics, which keeps me going <3

Series Masterlist. Masterlist. Inbox.

"You're back early."

Carmy had swung the door open, expecting to come home to an empty apartment. Instead, he's met with the sight of you, sitting on the couch, undoing the straps of your shoes.

"Fuckin' disaster," you mutter, loud enough for him to hear.

He breathes out a chuckle at the stormy look on your face. Carmy thinks you're cutest when you're angry. He aches to smooth the crease between your brows with his thumb.

"That bad?" he asks, taking a seat next you and kicking off his sneakers.

"You wouldn't even believe."

He rises and makes his way to the kitchen, filling the tea kettle and placing it on the stove top. Grabbing two mugs, he casts a glance over his shoulder at you, frowning at your body language. You look defeated.

Carmy steeps two cups of tea, placing one of them carefully into your waiting hands. He resumes his seat on the sofa, pressing his thigh against yours and turning to face you.

"You wanna talk about it?"

You think for a moment before replying.

"You're gonna laugh at me."

His face instantly crumples, confusion written all over it.

"I'll never laugh at you. I'll laugh with you, sure. But never at you."

He nudges your shoulder with his, urging you to go on.

"Okay, fine. The actual date was pretty good. He took me to that Italian place downtown-"

"Dolce Vita? Did you get the truffle pasta I told you about?" Carmy interrupts you before you can continue.

"Yes, oh my God. It was incredible. Do you think you can recreate it sometime?"

"Fuck yeah. They're pretty secretive with their recipes, but I think I can figure it out. You can help me if you want - I'm gonna need a sous chef."

He pulls a reluctant laugh from you, the sound echoing off the ceramic of your mugs. You both know that being the sous chef involves you sitting on the counter drinking wine while Carmy does all the work.

"Of course. I'll always be your sous chef."

"I'll hold you to that."

You smile at him gently, a little taken aback by the sincerity in his voice.

"Anyway. The dinner went great. He seemed super interested in me, asked me questions, told me about his job, his hobbies, his dog. He was hot, and good to talk to. I thought I'd hit the jackpot."

"And then?"

"And then we went back to his apartment. And it all went to shit."

He chuckles, blue eyes glinting in the moonlight.

"Tell me more."

"You really want to hear about all of this?"

It's not like you and Carmy aren't close. You absolutely are. It's just that there's always been this unspoken connection between the two of you. A bubbling, fiery attraction that you both shut down repeatedly, screwing the lid on tight whenever it rears its head. So, you tend to avoid talking to Carmy about dating. You're scared you'll accidentally blurt out the truth - you compare every single date to him.

"Of course I do."

His answer is so genuine it makes you ache. You continue, hesitantly.

"Well... things got a little... heavy. He wasn't a bad kisser, I guess... he just wasn't... a good one? He kept biting my lip super hard and it kinda hurt. Then he pulled my clothes off like a high schooler, and he's on top of me, and I'm waiting for him to sort of... do... anything? And then he's finished. Like, completely done. And then he has the nerve to ask me if I finished."

Carmy's mouth has fallen open, shock etched across his face. After a long, heavy pause, he speaks.

"What the fuck?"

You look at him for moment, before bursting into contagious laughter. He joins you, both of you with your heads thrown back, giggles reverberating around the lowlit room.

"I mean, seriously," he pants, still laughing. "What the fuck?"

"I didn't even answer him. I just put my clothes on, grabbed my bag and left without saying a word."

Every time you try to stifle your laughter, a giggle escapes. The situation wasn't funny at the time, but looking back, it's hilarious.

All of a sudden, you both go silent. You're deep in thought, reflecting on the seemingly never ending stream of bad dates that you've endured. Carmy is watching you intently, ocean blue eyes glued to your face.

"Fuck," you breathe. "This is kinda pathetic."

Carmy inhales deeply, and turns his body so it's facing yours on the couch.

"The way I see it," he begins, "you have two options."

You quirk a brow in confusion and stay quiet, waiting for him to explain.

"You can sit here feeling sorry for yourself, or, you can let me fuck you the way you deserve."

Your mouth falls open in shock at the exact same moment your brain seems to shut down. You can't think. You can't process his words. All you can focus on is the way he's staring at you. You suddenly feel hot under his gaze, the hairs on the back of your neck standing up. A shiver runs down your spine, and you have to remind yourself to breathe.

"Wh-... what?" you choke out.

"You heard me, honey. You can wallow in your little pity party, or you can let me show you what it's like to be with someone who can actually make you come. Your choice."

His voice has dropped an octave lower than usual, the tone warm and honeyed. He's still staring at you, blue gaze unrelenting.

"Is this gonna fuck everything up between us?" you whisper hesitantly.

Carmy reaches out and places a gentle hand on your cheek, thumb stroking careful circles into your skin.

"I don't think anything can fuck up what we have," he murmurs. "You're the only thing in my life that makes sense."

His confession seems to sober you up, the honesty in his words snapping you back to your senses.

"Okay."

He almost does a double take at the sureness in your voice.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. Put your money where your mouth is, Carmen."

"There she is," he chuckles. "You scared me when you went quiet for a second there."

"Well, if what you say is true, you're not gonna be able to shut me up for the night."

He laughs darkly, and slides closer to you slightly.

"Oh, honey. You're gonna wish you hadn't said that."

He tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, tracing the journey of your neck with his fingertips. He rests his hand lightly at the base of your throat, the heavy weight of it making you pant.

"If there's any point where you don't like something, or you want me to slow down, just say so. Okay?"

You nod your head, entranced by the sudden dominance he's displaying. You've never seen this side of him before. You can't believe he's been hiding it this whole time.

"Words, pretty. Need to hear you say it."

"Yes. I understand. I'll tell you, I promise."

He doesn't say anything in reply, just smirks. He lets you sit in the silence for a moment too long, the anticipation slowly killing you.

"Please, Carmen," you breathe. "Please."

"Fuck," he groans, shuffling closer to you. "You sound so pretty when you beg."

Carmy leans in and kisses your cheek gently, testing the waters. He presses a kiss to your other cheek, and pulls back to watch for your reaction. When he's happy, he tilts forward and leaves a careful kiss on your chin, then your forehead, then both of your closed eyes, before kissing you on the side of your mouth. His closeness makes you whine, desperate for him to give you what you want.

Finally, he connects his lips to yours, starting off slow and tender. When you tangle your fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck and try to pull him even closer, his resolve snaps. His tongue sweeps into your mouth, exploring eagerly. You clamber over him and climb into his lap, straddling his hips and pressing yourself into his body.

Carmy can't decide where to put his hands. He's grabbing at your waist, running his fingers up your back, pulling you into him by your ass. You're both groaning into each others mouths, enraptured by the other person and the all consuming way they kiss.

"Can I take this off?" he asks lowly, pulling at the hem of your dress.

Instead of answering, you pull it over your head, throwing it onto the floor in front of you.

"Fuck," he murmurs. "Most beautiful girl I've ever seen."

His hands are roaming all of your exposed skin, as if he can't get enough. He's terrified he won't ever get to see you like this again, so he's not going to waste a second.

You grind your hips down into his, eliciting a groan from the both of you. His hands tighten their grip on your waist, as he leans up to press open mouthed kisses to your jaw. Your fingers fly to the hem of his t shirt, pulling it off swiftly. You manage to shove his jeans down and off, before attempting to pull off his underwear. Carmy stops you in your tracks.

"Nuh uh," he tuts. "This is about you. Not me."

He pulls you off his lap gently and shuffles so his back is resting against the couch cushions. He spreads his legs wide, and gestures for you to sit between them. When you don't move, he looks at you carefully.

"Give me a color, pretty girl."

You take a deep breath, and smile at him softly.

"Green, Carmen. Promise."

You manoeuvre sideways, so you can place yourself with your back to his chest. He wraps his arms around you for a moment and holds you tightly, as if he's scared you'll disappear any second. You relax into his embrace, all the tension leaving your body. You have nothing to worry about. It's just you and Carmen, in the place you call home.

You drop your head back into Carmy's shoulder, and allow yourself to get lost in the feeling of his hands on your skin. He's begun tracing patterns down your arms, your sides, your stomach, until he reaches your underwear. He plays with the band, dipping his finger underneath in a feather light touch. Goose bumps rise across your body and you shiver, practically vibrating with need.

"Carmen," you whisper. "Don't tease."

"But that's half the fun," he murmurs into your ear, and you can hear the smile in his voice.

You can picture it perfectly, too. The way his eyes crinkle, the way his mouth curves, the way he bites his lip to stifle it. The image in your mind makes you melt into him further. You want to be as close to him as you physically can be. You'd completely disappear into him if you could.

He brings you back to reality by cupping you over your underwear, groaning when he feels the saturated material.

"Oh, pretty girl. Is this all for me? Fuck."

Suddenly, his game of teasing has lost all its fun. Carmy twists his fingers into your underwear and pulls them off in one swift movement, throwing them in the general direction of your dress on the floor. He places a hand on each of your thighs and spreads them apart, hooking them over his legs.

Carmy starts off slow, careful. He caresses over your skin, gentle and almost apprehensive. When he gets to your core, he swipes a finger through, testing the waters. When you buck your hips into his hand, he knows you're both on the same page.

"Just relax, okay? Gonna make you feel good."

His deep, smooth, whiskey like voice is doing nothing to help the heat bubbling in your stomach. You only whine in response, wiggling your hips to urge him to keep going.

Carmy throws one arm around your stomach, keeping you plastered to his body. You can feel him hot and hard against your back, and you so desperately want to feel him that your mouth is watering. You grind back into him, and he reads your mind.

"Not yet," he whispers. "This is about you, remember? Need to show you what you've been missing."

With that, he circles your clit with two fingers, slowly but surely. He revels in the noises you elicit. They're making him dizzy, disorientated. He never thought he'd be the one to pull a sound like that from you. He's quite convinced he's dreaming.

"Let me hear you. Don't hold back on me, okay?"

You nod your head frantically, willing to give him whatever he asks if you get what you want.

Carmy slips a finger into you slowly, moaning under his breath at your warmth. When he thinks you're ready, he adds a second finger, and sets a steady rhythm, trying to figure out what you like.

After he's set his pace, he starts to curl his fingers on the up stroke, grinning to himself when he finds the spot.

"Yeah? Right there? That's it, isn't it?"

You're nodding and shaking and pawing at his forearms, trying to tether yourself to reality in any way you can. You think you might be floating, on cloud 9, in some sort of euphoric trance. You can't believe no one's ever made you feel like this before. You're convinced no one ever will again.

Carmy quickens his pace and basks in the glory of your moans. He thinks this might be the most beautiful you've ever looked, spread out completely for him. Every inch of your skin is touching his, and it makes his heart skip a beat for a second.

He presses a kiss into your hair and keeps his mouth there, murmuring honeyed praises into your ear.

"Doin' so good for me."

"You got it, honey, that's it."

"Atta girl. Keep going. Almost there."

"You look so fuckin' pretty like this. Fuck. Gonna be thinking about this forever."

"I'll ruin you, baby. Nothing's ever gonna compare to this, to what we have."

All you can do is moan in response, his filthy words pushing you closer and closer to the edge. You're almost there, but something is stopping you. You whine in frustration, tears welling in your eyes. Carmy feels the tension suddenly grasp your muscles, and leans down to mutter to you softly.

"What is it, sweet girl? What do you need? Just tell me. Anything, and I'll give it to you."

You're not sure how much you trust your voice right now, so you decide to show him instead. You take the hand that he's using to hold you to him and move it up your body until it's resting against your throat. You tighten your fingers around his, and moan in response to the pressure.

"Oh, baby," he coos. "Filthy fuckin' girl. Here I thought you were so innocent, and this whole time you wanted to be choked like a whore?"

The way he degrades you so lovingly makes you mewl. You'd never ever trust anyone else to speak to you this way in such an intimate moment - but with Carmen, there's no hesitation. You know he's just telling you what you need to hear in the heat of the moment. And you love him for it.

"Fuck, Carmen," you manage to choke out. "Keep going. Don't stop, please."

"I'll do anything you want if you keep saying my name like that," he whispers.

"Carmen," you moan in response. "Carmy Carmy Carmy Carmy Carmy."

You're chanting his name like a prayer. He's rutting into your back, hips grinding and circling in time with his fingers that are maintaining their steady rhythm. His fingers tighten around your throat as he crooks his digits just right, and the result is a devastating moan from you that Carmy wishes to have on repeat for the rest of his life.

"So close," you whisper hoarsely. "Harder."

Carmy uses his thumb to circle your clit with one hand, other hand pulling you by your neck back into him tightly. He grinds his hips dirtily into you, and the feeling of him so silky and warm against you is what sends you over the edge. The corners of your vision go white as you arch into him, head thrown backwards into his chest. The sounds you're making are so melodic, so borderline angelic that Carmy almost cries. Heaven, he thinks. This is salvation.

Carmy finishes with you, climaxing onto the soft skin of your back. You both relax simultaneously, chests heaving and panting. He removes his fingers gently and wraps both arms around you, pulling you into him tightly despite the mess. He reaches to brush the hair out of your face, and the gesture is so tender it makes your lip quiver.

"Thank you," you whisper after what feels like hours of comfortable silence.

"Sorry I called you a whore," he murmurs back.

You let out a surprised laugh, vibrating with amusement in his arms.

"I know you didn't mean it."

"I mean I did give you the best orgasm of your life, so... call it even?"

"You're forgiven," you chuckle. "Completely forgiven."

You trace gentle patterns over his forearms with your fingertips, following the black ink of his tattoos. He sighs in contentment and places a kiss into your hair, relaxing further into the couch.

You sit together like that for a while, neither of you too concerned with the time. It's not often you see Carmy so relaxed, so serene. You're enjoying it for as long as you can.

"We should clean up," he says quietly, eventually. "Sorry about the mess."

"It's okay. Worth it," you tease, pinching his thigh. He pinches your side in retaliation, which makes you jump.

"Come on, trouble."

He stands from the couch, never letting go of the grip he has on you. You have no choice but to stand with him, yelping as he half carries you through the apartment towards the shower.

The sounds of both of your laughter bounce off of the abandoned mugs of tea still sat on the coffee table, melodic and joyous. The moonlight seeps through the windows, illuminating the beginning of something special in the living room of your shared apartment.

[valtsv]

if you dont mind sharing, can you talk more about your experience being haunted?

well it was definitely influenced by my paranoid delusions, but after i watched the chernobyl hbo miniseries back when it came out i developed this fixation on the idea that i was being haunted by the judgemental spectres of the real people who'd died in that disaster. it was so real to me that i couldn't even take a shower without feeling like they were in there with me somehow, just silently watching. i started showering in my clothes and barely slept at night because i was certain that there were eyes on me as i lay there, crowded around me. i hardly left the house because i couldn't bear to bring this congregation of ghosts i'd gathered anywhere and try to pretend that nothing was wrong.

i was terrified and visibly unwell but i didn't feel like i could tell anyone or it'd be a betrayal somehow. i didn't think the ghosts would harm me if i did, i wasn't scared that they had any ill intentions towards me at all, but i felt so unbearably guilty at the idea of exposing them to anyone and forcing them to be a spectacle. i think that might have been what induced the delusion in the first place; my guilt at participating in that spectacle (ironic considering i'm obsessed with the terror now, and historical rpf is an ethical minefield but hardly the root of all evil). that and a combination of extreme stress and isolation convincing me that my entire flat was haunted because i would hear noises at night with no discernable source coming from the other rooms - voices and music and activity, despite all my roommates being on holiday and denying anything when i asked them.

i didn't know what they wanted from me, but i eventually started to try to accept that it was irrational to feel so much guilt for an event that happened before i was even born and had no possible way of preventing or changing the outcome of, and the haunted feeling stopped bothering me so much. that's why i think that ghosts are psychological manifestations of emotion, especially guilt and grief. you can be haunted without it necessarily being supernatural in nature. and to me, those ghosts were real and very much present. they were never visible, but their presence was overwhelming. it feels like an insult to myself to deny that they had a real effect on me, even if they were just a delusion, and that's what a ghost is to me.

[wolfwrenweek]

The prompts for the second annual WolfWren Week (Nov 11-15) have been decided! Our theme this year is Tarot Cards, meaning each day of the event will have prompts and a card to use for inspiration. Check out our full About & Rules for more! A text version of the prompt graphic can also be found below.

DAY ONE: November 11 The Moon | Lothal UPRIGHT: Illusion, fear, anxiety, subconscious, intuition REVERSED: Release of fear, repressed emotion, inner confusion

PROMPTS: “Are you following me?” I Can Make Her Worse Fighting as Flirting Touch Starved Eye Contact Vampire AU Sparring Hatefuck

DAY TWO: November 12 The Wheel of Fortune | The Eye of Sion UPRIGHT: Good luck, karma, life cycles, destiny, a turning point REVERSED: Bad luck, resistance to change, breaking cycles

PROMPTS: "You want to kiss me so bad it makes you look stupid.” You'd have to stop the world just to stop the feeling “Why are you looking at me like that?" Soulmate Identifying Mark Bounty Hunter AU Force Bond

DAY THREE: November 13 The Tower | Great Mothers' Fortress on Peridea UPRIGHT: Sudden change, upheaval, chaos, revelation, awakening REVERSED: Personal transformation, fear of change, averting disaster

PROMPTS: "I'd let the world burn for you." “Don’t leave.” / “Please stay.” “I still hate you," "Good." Abandonment Issues Enemies to Lovers "I can help you." Sharing Clothes Injury/Healing Rebel Shin Cowboy AU

DAY FOUR: November 14 The Chariot | Thrawn's Star Destroyer UPRIGHT: Control, willpower, success, action, determination REVERSED: Self-discipline, opposition, lack of direction

PROMPTS: Put her canine teeth in the side of my neck To Be Loved Is To Be Changed “You came?” “You called.” "Going somewhere?” Trans Shin Hati / T4T Arranged Marriage Ancient Greece AU Body Worship Medieval AU

DAY FIVE: November 15 The Lovers | Sabine Wren / Shin Hati UPRIGHT: Love, harmony, relationships, values alignment, choices REVERSED: Self-love, disharmony, imbalance, misalignment of values

PROMPTS: Shin through Sabine’s POV / Sabine through Shin’s POV “It's rotten work" "not to me, not if it's you" Accidental Co-Parenting/Co-Guardians Scissor Till The Cows Come Home Oh my god they were roommates… Florist/Tattoo Artist AU Shin Learning Mando’a Return to Mandalore Love at First Bite Domestic Life Post-Peridea

You can follow along with us on Twitter/X and Instagram as well 💚🧡 If you have any questions or concerns, our ask box is open! Don't forget to add #wolfwrenweek and #wolfwrenweek2024 onto anything you create as well! All the art featured in this post was created by the lovely @sapphicsparkles, don’t forget to go check out their other work too 🗡️

[clarisse0o]

Camp Wiegman-Part 64

Lucy Bronze x Ona Batlle

Alternative Universe : Military School

Words: 5k

Masterlist

———————————————————————

Monday, March 1; 6:15 AM - Alexia and Ona's Room

Returning to my roots stings throughout my entire system. I'm exhausted. My first night away from Lucy's arms was a disaster. Needless to say, I didn't get a wink of sleep. Now she's doing her usual rounds around our beds while I yawn so wide it feels like my jaw might unhinge.

"Rough night, Batlle?" she teases kindly.

I groan pitifully, causing my friends to chuckle. She stops in front of me, scanning me from head to toe, checking my outfit before pulling me into her arms. A sigh of relief escapes me instantly. I bury my nose in her neck, inhaling her scent deeply to ensure I remember it. When I finally lift my head, she lingers on my face. One might think she's scrutinizing my barely-there makeup, but it's probably my dark circles she's focused on. Then she kisses me properly, making Alexia clear her throat after a moment.

"We should get going."

"Yep," Lucy exhales. "Go on, off you go," she says.

I head for the door, following my roommate.

"And Ona," she calls as I reach the threshold.

"Yes?"

"Don't forget your evening classes. Time to get back into the groove."

I smile and nod. We spent yesterday reviewing my classes and finishing the last bits of homework I had left. I'd already done most of them during the evening classes before the break so I wouldn't be bothered during the two-week vacation. It was a good way to get back on track.

"I don’t plan on missing them. Have a good day, Commander."

A smug smile stretches across her lips as I leave the room. I catch up to Alexia, who had gone ahead. She smiles when I reach her.

"Looks like things are going well, huh?"

"Better, yes, but it could still be better without this decision hanging over me."

"Has she changed her mind?"

"Yes and no. She explained the reasons behind her choice," I reply, shrugging. "We'll see. First, I plan to negotiate at my next meeting. Then, I’ll send a few requests to other galleries, and we'll see."

"That's already something. I hope everything goes well."

"Absolutely!"

We step outside, where most of our friends are waiting. My eyes fall on Alessia, reminding me of yesterday’s anxiety. She and her sister know about Lucy. I don’t expect them to tell anyone, but it's still a situation that could make things awkward. We greet everyone before heading to the cafeteria. Good habits really are coming back.

"Your sister’s not here?" I ask Ale.

"Well, turns out she’s got a girlfriend now."

"Really?" I ask, surprised.

"Yeah, apparently she's here, at school, so I assume she's with her."

"Wasn't she a bit difficult because you were away for two weeks?"

"Nope. Seems like having a girlfriend has its perks. I plan to find out who she is just to thank her."

I laugh. I'm curious too. With everything that happened before the break, I hadn’t noticed her getting close to anyone in particular.

"We’ll do our investigation if you want," I tease.

"Oh, for sure! If she thinks she’s going to keep her in the shadows, she's dreaming."

"And you’re the one saying that?" I tease again.

"My case is different."

"Of course," I mock. "Still, it’s time for her to introduce her at least once."

"Yeah, yeah. Soon, since the year is almost over, and I plan to move in with Jenni after school."

Seems I’m not the only one thinking about the "after school" period. I hope she tells her soon because I have a feeling this situation might backfire given how Alba is. We reach the cafeteria. Once we’re served, we sit at our usual table. From where I am, I can see Lucy join her side with Ingrid. I don’t linger, though, afraid I won’t be able to look away from her. The others start recounting their fantastic vacations. I turn to Alessia, who’s sitting next to me. Best to address the elephant in the room right away.

"How were your holidays?" I ask her.

"Pretty good," she admits. "And yours?"

She’s calm. A bit too calm, and probably a little embarrassed too. Lucy did make a point of kissing me in front of her to stake her claim the day they caught us together. I still don’t know if Alessia saw that. All I know is that Lucy marked me with a huge hickey on my neck again last night, just to be sure. My friends haven’t seen it yet since I’ve kept my scarf on, and I plan to keep it that way for a while.

"Good as well," I reply with a small smile.

"Is your girlfriend planning to keep an eye on me from now on?" she retorts, without much emotion.

I glance over at Lucy and see that, indeed, she’s sneaking looks at us between sentences with Ingrid. I bite my lip to suppress a smile. She’s impossible. Yesterday's lecture about jealousy clearly wasn’t enough for her. Maybe it’s time I tell her how much I love her to get her to relax.

"I'll talk to her. Don’t worry."

"Have you seen the hickey she gave her?" Alexia teases mockingly.

"Stop," I groan, unconsciously covering my neck with my hand. "It was the only way to leave without a ten-hour lecture."

Alessia and Alexia laugh at my expense, making me blush even more. To be honest, I like Lucy’s jealousy, but I’d never admit that to them. After our cold moment, she simply reminded me that she loves me no matter what. She knows how to reassure me.

"Did someone say hickey?" 

We turn toward the voice we all recognize. Alba stands behind me with her tray in hand. I smile softly at her. I’ve missed her, actually. I didn’t expect to get so attached to her personality, but I have. She’s genuinely a good person deep down.

"Mind if we join you?"

It’s only then that I notice someone standing behind her. It’s Misa, and judging by the look she gives me, there’s no doubt she’s the girlfriend Ale mentioned. She never hung out with us much, but it happened occasionally. All I remember about her is that she wasn’t very friendly. Her choice surprises me, but after all, I don’t know her well enough to judge their relationship. The question was mostly for show, as they sit down at the end of our table. I exchange a look with Ale, who doesn’t seem thrilled with what she’s seeing. She’s understood the situation just like I have, but I know from previous conversations that she doesn’t like Misa much either. Neither of us knows how to place her.

"So, what’s this about a hickey? Who’s the victim?" Alba asks again.

"Ona," Alessia replies. "Apparently, from her girlfriend."

"Really?" she asks, surprised. "You’re with someone?"

I run my hand through my hair, feeling awkward. I didn’t want this to spread around the table. I feel like Alessia is challenging me, which is irritating. But if Lucy gave me a hickey, it’s because she wants people to know I’m taken, right? After that little internal debate, I nod.

"Uh, yeah. I’ve been dating someone for a little while," I admit.

"Wow, didn’t see that coming," she smiles. "That’s cool! Is she from here? Do we know her?"

"Alba, that's none of your business," Alexia cuts in. "And you? When were you going to tell me you were dating Misa?"

I'm relieved by her intervention. It gives me time to breathe, and she knows why. I can’t afford to reveal Lucy’s identity.

"If I’d waited as long as you to admit I was seeing someone, I wouldn’t have told you until next year," she retorts proudly.

- "What nonsense," she muttered, rolling her eyes before glancing at me.

I stifled a small laugh. I gave her a sympathetic smile, but in reality, her sister wasn't wrong.

- "So, are we not allowed any juicy details?" Alba returned to the original topic.

Of course, she was back to me. Unfortunately, I hadn't had time to think. I just shrugged. I would like to share with them, but I know I can't reveal everything.

- "She's a girl. A few years older than me, and well, that's it. We've only been together for a few weeks."

Only a few weeks. Now that I say it, it feels like we've been together for months. I'm already eager to reach our first month. Unfortunately, that's in a few days, and we'll still be here. I'm trying to stay positive, reminding myself that we'll be in Barcelona this weekend. At least I’ll have the advantage of being on my home turf. I can plan something for her at a place she doesn’t know, with Mapi as my accomplice.

- "So, you're into girls too?" Misa asked.

I leaned to see her as she was sitting just next to Alessia. She kept eating while glancing at me. Surprisingly, she smiled. Now that she knew she had nothing to worry about with Alba, maybe she’d behave differently.

- "Indeed" I replied, without going into detail.

- "And this girl," Alba asked again, "does she treat you well at least?"

Alexia rolled her eyes again, making me suppress a laugh. Honestly, they should have stayed away from each other if they were going to act like this in each other's presence.

- "Absolutely. She's amazing, even if sometimes she struggles to grasp that she's the only one who matters to me."

I punctuated my words by showing off the huge purple, almost black, hickey on my neck. She had pinned me down against the mattress, leaving me no means to defend myself. My friends gasped in disbelief, making me chuckle slightly.

- "Damn, seeing it again now, I realize she didn’t hold back at all," Ale teased as I quickly covered the evidence. "Think I can tease her about it?"

- "You? Tease her?" I raised an eyebrow. "I’d love to see that," I mocked.

- "Oh, shut up," she mumbled.

- "Wait, you know her?" Alba asked, surprised.

- "Yeah. Who do you think I spent my vacation with?"

- "Any particular reason she marked you like that?" Alessia asked, trying to prevent a sibling argument.

- "I don't know," I admitted, shrugging. "Jealousy, I guess. She knows a bit about my friends... I mean, I tell her about them a lot, so she probably feels threatened," I quickly corrected myself.

- "I wonder why. You practically devour her with your eyes. You'd have to be blind not to notice," Ale commented.

I hid my blush behind my mug of hot chocolate. I knew how true her words were. I just hoped it wouldn't be too obvious here at school. Even though there were only two months left and Lucy had said she didn’t care if she got expelled, I wasn’t on the same page. I wanted her with me until the end, so I hoped we could stay discreet. It had been a while, so I glanced over at her table. I was disappointed to find it empty. I looked quickly toward the line where people were clearing their trays, but I had to admit the truth: she was already gone. Clearly, I was already missing her, judging by the pang I felt at this realization. This day was going to feel longer than I’d like to admit.

Monday, March 1st; 5:15 PM - Lucy and Ingrid's Office.

I tried not to seem too eager when I headed to Lucy's office. First, I had to be patient while Alessia talked to me after class, and then I had to weave through the students in the hallway. If it were up to me, I would have sprinted from class the moment the bell rang. But sadly, that only happens in movies. So here I was, standing in front of her office door, which was wide open. I tapped on the wood to announce my presence before stepping inside. I didn’t wait for permission anymore—I felt at home here after having come so often. I was greeted by an empty desk on the left and Lucy behind the one on the right. We were alone. Perfect.

- "Hello," I said cheerfully.

- "Close the door," she ordered without taking her eyes off the screen.

I was already almost at her desk when she gave the command. Oh, she didn't seem to be in a good mood. I turned back to obey without complaint. A few months ago, I would have already retorted for her to do it herself. But now, I sensed this wasn’t the moment. I hoped everything would be fine. I had missed her so much today, and I didn’t want to spend the little time we had together in a bad mood.

- "You're late," she noted, as if it needed pointing out.

- "Did you miss me?"

I tried to joke to lighten her mood. To my surprise, she stood up abruptly to face me.

- "Hell, yes."

Before I could react, she spun me around and pressed me against her desk. Her slightly cold hands slid under my already open jacket. I smiled against her lips as she took them without asking. She grabbed my thighs firmly, lifting me onto the desk. I welcomed her between my legs, running my hand through her hair. For someone who wanted to keep our two relationships separate, we were far from her long speeches.

- "Take off that scarf," she growled, tugging at it.

I laughed harder as I unwrapped it before she could strangle me with it.

- "You like seeing your marks on me? I got so many comments because of you."

- "Really? I didn’t see you take it off today."

I raised an amused eyebrow. So she was watching me. Good to know. To be fair, I wasn’t any better, but now I understood why I kept running into her in the hallways.

- "You did it on purpose, didn’t you?"

- "I have no idea what you’re talking about."

I laughed, wrapping my arms around her neck. She smiled mischievously in return.

- "Well, just so you know, my friends know I’m taken. I talked to Alba this morning, and the others figured it out. They teased me all through lunch trying to figure out who you are. I said you weren’t from the school, but they think I’m lying."

- "Why would they think I’m from here?"

- "No idea. They think I don’t have a life outside of school."

"Well, aside from Mapi, you don’t see many people from your old life," she reminded me. "They’re not wrong, really. »

- "Well, it's easy to meet people nowadays. There are social media or even dating apps."

- "As if that’s your thing... It isn’t, right? Maybe I should take your phone away…"

- "Hey! No way, you idiot. As if I’d do something like that."

I roll my eyes before she kisses me again. I’ve missed her lips. It’s hard to go from two weeks straight together to a sudden cut. I’ll be happy when we no longer have to deal with the constraints of school.

- "Did Alessia say anything?"

- "No. She thinks you’re very... How do I put it? Vampiric. Or something like that. I don’t think she expected you to devour my neck."

She laughs and kisses the mark. I checked it in the mirror again during lunch and realized it’ll probably stick around for a few more days. She then steps back from between my legs, signaling that our little break is over. I hop off the desk, landing on my feet.

- "As long as she doesn’t hover around you anymore, I don’t care what she calls me."

- "Oh please, like she’d even try to go up against you. It’s a good thing she knows now."

- "Hmm... Alright, get your stuff out so we can tackle your homework. How were your classes?"

- "Boring, as always," I sigh. "I’ll be glad when I finally graduate."

- "I get that, me too," she admits with a small smile. "But we’re not there yet. By the way, I talked to Wiegman about your interview."

- "Already?" I ask, surprised.

- "Yup. The sooner it’s settled, the better. That way, we can avoid unnecessary arguments."

- "What did she say?"

- "She’s giving you permission to go, since it’s after your time here. But she’ll have to inform your mom."

I shrug, indifferent. It’s not like my mom doesn’t already know I had an interview. She’ll figure it out soon enough.

- "Will you come with me?"

- "Of course, I’ll drive you," she smiles. "There are perks to still being your guardian. Now, you just need to call Mr. Fields to find out the date."

- "Yeah... Can we also check out other galleries?"

- "I’ve already done some research," she tells me. "I made a list and sent it to Beth. Since she’s more knowledgeable and knows their reputations, she promised to review them and let me know which ones are worth sending your resume to."

- "Thank you. You’re amazing," I reply sincerely.

- "It’s only natural," she says, linking our hands. "I’ve thought about it a lot, and I want to apologize again for making you think I wanted to push you away. That was never my intention."

- "I know, don’t worry," I smile softly. "Let’s wait to see what Fields says before getting ahead of ourselves. He might offer something else."

- "Don’t get your hopes up too much. He can have as many apprentices as he wants. If you say no, that might be it for him."

- "We’ll see," I say confidently. "He seemed really interested in my profile. Maybe he won’t want to let me go so easily."

- "Babe, seriously. I don’t want you to get your hopes up and be let down. I’ll be happy if he offers you something else, but it’s better not to expect too much."

I nod. She’s right. Ever since I got the positive response, I’ve been feeling confident, but I’m likely setting myself up for a fall. I sigh, sinking into my seat.

- "Shall we get to work?"

- "You’ll get to work," she replies with a small smile. "Try to do it on your own, and I’ll correct it. I’ve still got a lot of work to do since the break is over."

I groan as I pull out the management assignment from this morning. Our teacher didn’t go easy on us, and we’ve already been hit with five exercises under the pretext that we need to be ready for the big day.

- "It’s not as fun without you."

- "Oh, come on. I won’t be sitting next to you during the exams. This is the final stretch. You need to learn to handle it on your own now."

I sigh and pout but still get to work. In a few months, I’ll be sitting through the same kind of exercises, except it’ll be on an exam paper for four hours straight. For now, I have nothing to complain about. The stress is slowly creeping in. I know I won’t be fully prepared, especially in my main subjects. Let’s not forget I’m two years behind. And to top it off, I found out today that we actually have compressed courses. Murphy explained that due to the school’s structure, we’re missing a semester out of the usual three years. After quickly doing the math in my head, we only have three semesters instead of four in a given track. At least I understand now why we’re moving faster than normal. Fortunately, my teachers often revisit points that were covered in previous years during the course. Thanks to Lucy, I’ve started asking for help more often. While I think most of my exams are out of reach, Lucy believes in me. She says I might have some terrible grades, but I can still pass. That’s all the support I need. I’m determined to prove her right. I don’t care about having outstanding grades, just passing is enough. I’ll focus on excelling in the subjects I’m stronger in, like literature and languages. They won’t be the most heavily weighted, given the track I chose, but it’s better than nothing. Time passes, and I finally finish the exercises for my upcoming classes.

- "Can you check my work?" I ask my girlfriend.

- "Of course."

She pushes aside her pile of papers and grabs my assignments. She picks up a pencil and starts reading through them. I take advantage of the calm moment to admire her. She moves her long brown hair to the side, making her even more beautiful. I smile as she unintentionally reveals the mark I gave her. It’s much smaller now and a few days old. Our bubble bursts with a knock at the door, followed by its immediate opening to reveal my management teacher. His sudden presence reminds me that we’re never truly safe from being interrupted, even with the door closed.

- "Oh yes, I forgot about your evening classes," he murmurs. "Good evening, I hope I’m not disturbing you."

- "Not particularly," Lucy replies. "How can I help you?"

- "I was just following up on the field trip, but I can come back later if necessary."

Lucy leans back in her chair, crossing her legs, but she keeps my packet of assignments in her hand and removes her glasses—the ones that make her look so irresistible—with the other. She places them on the desk and massages the bridge of her nose, closing her eyes for a moment before opening them again.

- "I’ve already told you, Ona isn’t a problem. What do you need?"

I can’t help but smile at her cold tone. He’s definitely getting on her nerves. I turn back to my teacher, who looks slightly flustered.

- "Well, I wanted to confirm that Miss Engen and you will be part of the teaching staff accompanying us."

- "Alright. Is that all?"

- "For now. I’ll let you know the date of the trip and which group you’ll be in charge of."

- "Hmm. If you’re organizing the groups, make sure Ona is in mine. Since I’m designated as her guardian until the end of the year, it’ll allow me to keep an eye on her."

I can’t help but laugh at that request. Thank goodness Wiegman put her in charge. We’re definitely taking advantage of it now. I thought I was being discreet, but Lucy must have heard me because she raises an eyebrow as she glances at me. I bite my lip to stop myself from laughing again. I love it when she plays the serious role like that.

- "Any objections?" she asks me.

- "None," my teacher responds.

It’s too much; I have to laugh again. He doesn’t even know who she’s addressing anymore. Lucy doesn’t miss the opportunity to remind him.

"I was talking to Ona. »

- "No problem, Bronze," I replied with as much seriousness as I could muster in that moment.

- "Good. Well, that's settled then. I'll be waiting for your update."

- "Great. Thanks again for agreeing."

Before he turned to leave, I smiled when I noticed him lingering on Lucy's neck. She couldn’t have chosen a better time to show off the mark I left on her. Then his eyes shifted to me, narrowing slightly.

- "See you tomorrow, sir," I said innocently.

- "Hmm... see you tomorrow."

- "Have a good evening," Lucy added just before he left.

I turned back to Lucy, who had resumed correcting my work as if none of that had just happened. Her glasses were back on her nose. With the door closed again, I seized the opportunity.

- "Is he always that annoying?"

- "He never was."

- "Really? I think he is. He tries to get to you at every chance he gets."

- "Well, now you can be sure he won’t come by after class, not with you here."

Her mischievous tone didn’t sit well with me. I slumped back in my chair, crossing my arms. It was obvious that if he wanted to be alone with her, he wouldn’t come by at this time anymore. That idea bothered me a lot.

- "You're not going to sulk, are you?" she teased. "I was as cold as possible. I think I made it pretty clear, didn't I?"

- "Hmm..."

- "Plus, I made sure you’d be in my group for that outing," she added. "I couldn’t really do much more than that."

- "Yes, you could. You could tell him outright that you’re not interested in men."

- "Fine. I’ll do that if that’s what you want."

A silence settled in. My mood lifted a little. I hadn’t expected her to go that far, but I felt relieved. At least I wouldn’t have to worry about him anymore. I watched her as she reached the last page. She had used her pencil several times, so I could already tell there were corrections to make. When she finished, she handed everything back to me.

- "Here you go. You made a few mistakes, but you’ve understood the essentials."

- "Thanks," I replied shyly.

I took my papers and started working on my errors. Most of the time, they were just careless mistakes. Management requires a lot of formulas, and even though I’d memorized them with Lucy’s help before the holidays, I still mixed them up sometimes.

- "How was your night?"

- "Rough," I admitted. "I had trouble getting used to my small bed again, and I didn’t sleep much."

- "Your nightmares came back?"

- "No... I’m a bit afraid they will, but we’ll see. Worst case, I’ll ask to sleep over with Alexia."

I felt close enough to her now that I could ask her for that. I was sure she wouldn’t mind if I did.

- "Hmm... If it’s just her, I think I can accept that," Lucy said with a small smile. "You should take a page out of my book, you know. I know how to control myself."

- "Is that so?" I giggled. "Shall we talk about how you stared down Alessia after I talked to her? I saw you," I accused her shamelessly.

- "I think we should calm down," she laughed. "It’s not like we just spent two weeks living together."

I smiled. She didn’t even try to defend herself.

- "We should, that's true, but I doubt I could resist. I love your jealousy. It makes me feel important in your eyes."

- "You can. You're the most important person to me anyway, baby."

I blushed softly at her unexpected compliment.

- "You are too. Never doubt that. No one even comes close, no matter who I talk to."

- "Noted," she smiled. "Just make sure to remind your friend that you're taken."

- "You do that quite well on your own," I teased, tilting my head to expose my neck. "She knows, don’t worry."

- "Then we have no problem," she smiled wider.

Indeed. Aside from the issue of next year, there didn’t seem to be any more problems between us. I sincerely hoped everything would turn out fine, and even if it didn’t, I was confident we’d find a way through it.

[starlightiing]

Anyway I have to start writing again. I have some of the next part of Car Crash Hearts written but I'd like to work on something else for a minute.

The descriptions are awful but there's not a lot of room to expand on them.

1. Pierre majors in sports cardiology and his roommate Esteban is an athlete. Esteban ends up in F1 at the end, with Pierre as his personal physician.

2. Pierre works in the hatchery with baby dinosaurs and Esteban is on asset containment security. Disaster strikes and they're left behind when the Evac boats leave. They have to work together to get off the island.

3. Pierre is a highly advanced state of the art android and you can't really tell the difference between him and a human unless you were to open him up. Esteban is his technician and the only person in the world who can fix him/maintenance him. But something happens that ends up in Pierre and Esteban going on the run (Estie has now technically stolen this android) and they fall in begrudging love along the way.

4. Pierre is found half-turned. Esteban puts him out of his misery and finishes the job (he's been a vampire for a while). However, Pierre's other sire comes back and makes a lot of problems for them. More than they are prepared to deal with.

5. If you haven't read the first part of Car Crash Hearts, I implore you to. But yeah Pierre gets into a horrible car accident (personal, not on the track) and Esteban is still listed as his emergency contact. He's left to pick up the pieces and deal with his complicated feelings regarding Pierre while he's watching the poor guy fight for his life in a hospital bed.

6. Pierre gets into a crash on track and he ends up paralyzed from the waist down and unable to drive. There are some other medical conditions as well. He requires a full time caretaker. Nyck de Vries is who Pierre's mum ends up hiring. He's a licensed counselor, a registered nurse, and one of the best caretakers in the world. Even he is not prepared for the wonder and mess that is a broken hearted, stubborn, scorned Pierre Gasly. Angst, healing, and love abound here.

7. Train AU - Pierre and Charles grow up poor (I haven't decided on the time period yet but it's far in the past). Pierre has a plethora of medical conditions (heart condition, severe asthma, among other things) and he's unable to do much of anything at all. Charles, even as kids, always put Pierre first and stayed loyally by his side. He ends up coming up with a plan to get them to a better life and maybe finally get Pierre into a doctor...but it's unknown if Pierre will be strong enough to survive the trip. Charles tries anyway.

8. Pierre rejects Charles. Charles turns to Esteban as a rebound. Esteban is incredibly wary, but he can't deny Charles what he needs. Things get a bit hairy, Esteban gets hurt a few times, but they do work it out in the end. Estie/Charles in the end.

[chaoticbooklesbian]

tell us more about going to dashcon what was it like!!!

I'll start out with a disclaimer: I'm one of the approximately five people who had an actually good time at Dashcon as it was happening. I was also 19 years old, my This Is Bad meter wasn't fully developed. These two things are intrinsically linked.

So. I had a really good time, personally. It was also a dumpster fire of an event. I was originally going to go with a partner, but we broke up and they wound up not even going. I'd already bought my plane tickets, so I reached out to the organizers and we worked out a combination of volunteering and panels that would get me a pass and a hotel room for free.

Yes, I was on multiple panels at this event. I was, and still am, an absolute nobody, and I was on multiple panels with now-published-author Mark Oshiro, who was already a Somebody when the con happened. I also volunteered at registration for basically the entire weekend when I wasn't doing panels or taking a quick trip to the expo hall. I hung out with some really cool people, I embarrassed the living daylights out of myself at one of my panels, I met some people I'm still friends with to this day. That's the good, and that's the impression I was left with when I left. It was a dumpster fire, but I had a really good time.

There was definitely some bad for me personally, too, though. Because my hotel room was on the con, I was going to be rooming with strangers. I got to the hotel having just schlepped over from the airport, met one of the organizers, and was given a key to a hotel room I'd be sharing with a married couple...and which only contained one king size bed. I changed out of my airport clothes and found the organizer who'd gotten me the room, told them what happened, and they switched me to a new room with two other volunteers who already knew each other. Everyone was super nice about it, at least. When the infamous $17k "ransom" hit, I gave literally all the cash in my wallet, leaving me with the less than $20 in my bank account to eat for the rest of the weekend. I didn't eat much. I spent most of Sunday afternoon holed up in a suite with one particular organizer and a bunch of other misfits waiting for their rides to the airport to go home.

The worst thing that happened for me, personally, over the entire weekend, involves someone else's private information that I do not feel comfortable disclosing. The short, non-disclosing version is that I and my roommates were called in to help with a situation that none of us were in the least bit qualified to help with and which was grossly mishandled by the organizers present. If I were in that same situation now, I would have handled it very, very differently, but I was 19 and listened to the people I perceived to be the adults in the room.

Overall, while I had a good time, I don't have any rose colored glasses about it. It was the worst event I've ever attended, I don't regret going in the slightest, and I've got a much better barometer for when an event is going to be a disaster and I should just stay home (or go home early, as the case may be).

[mamichigo]

⚠️(blood and injury)

--

The impact to his head must have been greater than he thought, if Cyno's first instinct after this disaster of a mission was to jump through one of the open windows to Alhaitham's house. There was a trail of blood where he had crawled towards the door, before collapsing on his numb legs. The room was empty; there were no signs of Alhaitham--or even Kaveh, he realized belatedly, almost forgetting the two were roommates. As Cyno laid there counting his breaths, he wondered why he was here. It was foolish.

He'd die pathetically at the Grand Scribe's office for something as nebulous as "instinct."

Still... Cyno clenched his jaw. If it was Alhaitham, he'd surely help--that's what he had thought. He tried to laugh, but couldn't. When exactly had his suspicions turned into blind faith? How silly. Alhaitham wasn't here. Cyno needed to get up and get actual help (preferably from a trained professional).

He wasn't here. Cyno closed his eyes.

"Alhaitham..."

It was barely a whisper. It couldn't possibly get anyone's attention. And yet, after a few long seconds, the door creaked open. Light poured into the room; through squinted eyes, Cyno saw a familiar silhouette.

For a moment, nothing happened.

He might have briefly blacked out, as the next time he opened his eyes, Alhaitham was crowding into his space. Something wet was pressed firmly to his brow, where blood had been gushing out into his left eye.

"Alhaitham?" He called out.

If he didn't say his name, Cyno couldn't be sure this was real. There was hazy quality to all of his senses, colors and light blurring with only the muted, gray tone of Alhaitham's hair to ground him.

"Why do you sound surprised?" He shot back. "You're in my house."

With that, Alhaitham got back to work, quickly bandaging whatever needed to be mended. "You're quite lucky none of your wounds were deep, otherwise you would've bled to death all over my office floor."

Cyno couldn't tell what Alhaitham was thinking. There was no particular inflection to his voice, no flicker in his expression. Perhaps he had overstayed his welcome, Cyno thought with sudden clarity.

It was hard to say where they stood with each other lately. They worked well together, even if Alhaitham did get on his nerves. But were they friends? Colleagues? Barely that? Cyno stared down at the neat row of bandages on his right arm, and decided Alhaitham had done more than enough for him.

"Thank you for helping me," he muttered, the words clumsy on his tongue. It was hard to speak, still. "If I-- You don't need to--"

Cyno pressed his lips into a thin line and wondered what he wanted to say. Ultimately he went with nothing at all. Instead, he supported himself on his wobbling arms and tried to force his legs to listen to his commands.

"What are you doing?"

Cyno snapped his head up, startled, and immediately regretted it. The world spun around him, his vision went white.  Then, Alhaitham was by his side again. He pressed a warm, wide palm to Cyno's eyes, shielding him from the light. The hand on his back soothed the bout of nausea before Cyno even realized how close he had been to throwing up.

“You don’t need to go running off as soon as you open your eyes, you're still concussed,” Alhaitham huffed. “I’m not going to take advantage of you now that you're weak, if that's what you're afraid of.”

Cyno blinked behind Alhaitham's palm. It wasn't a lack of emotion he was hearing in his voice, it was the same tone Alhaitham had back in Aaru village: quietly bitter. Cyno pulled Alhaitham's hand away, but kept his fingers on his wrist. He looked into Alhaitham's eyes, a somber green in the dark, like the ocean during a storm.

"Are you angry?" He asked, for lack of anything better to say.

Alhaitham chuckled, if the little puff of breath could be called that. There was no actual amusement in it.

"Did you think I'm so uncaring I'd feel nothing over seeing you bleeding and unconscious on my office floor?"

All of a sudden, Cyno felt like he could finally think through the fog clouding his mind. He became all the more aware of the wrist in his palm.

"You're shaking," he noted, awe coloring his voice. "Your pulse, too. It's racing."

"Signs of an adrenaline spike, yes."

A fight or flight response, a defense mechanism--because he had found Cyno injured. It was his morbid curiosity that compelled him to ask, "Do you care about me?"

"Yes," Alhaitham answered without pause, "more than you know."

Cyno nodded to himself and exhaled. The ache of his injuries was distant, now. His muscles unwound, and Cyno fell forward unrestricted--into Alhaitham's tense arms.

"I knew you'd help me," Cyno whispered into the dip of his collarbones. "I knew."

Alhaitham hummed in understanding, and Cyno pressed closer to feel the vibration of it.

"I think I get it now," Cyno continued, consciousness starting to slip away from him. "I get it."

"Get what?"

"Why I fell for you."

Alhaitham's hand was warm on the back of his neck. The world grew dark.

Cyno thought he felt a kiss being pressed to his head, and hoped that, too, was as real as the murmur of Alhaitham's voice against his ear.

"As for me, I've understood why a long time ago."

Cyno slept.

[toastywatchesstevenuniverse]

S1 E45

Rose's Scabbard

Okay so I've learned a lot today.

Also this episode much like the fireworks one made me..

Very uncomfortable. But even more so than that one did.

This episode was just......really fucking sad man.

First off:

None of the gems seemed to like Greg so far (Except Amethyst) but Pearl especially seemed particularly not very fond of him. I kinda didn't think much about that. I just assumed it was because "Greg is a slob & Pearl doesn't like that he's a slob." And honestly given his current state in the show rn, I ain't exactly too fond of the man either. Though the winter episode definitely made me like him more.

But uh....now I'm starting to think Pearl's distaste for him isn't as simple as that. Because Pearl....

This whole episode Pearl was being like....

Okay look we can't word this in any other way: PEARL WAS BEING A MASSIVE HOMO™ THE ENTIRE TIME LIKE GOD DAMN SHE WAS GAY™ AS FUCK ABOUT ROSE THIS EPISODE LIKE WOAH OKAY NOW I GET WHATS GOING ON HERE. PEARL IS A MASSIVE FUCKING LESBIAN™ FOR ROSE & NOW THAT THIS REVEAL HAS HIT. Well to be honest that actually explains a lot. Like, huh, yeah actually this makes sense & explains a lot about why she's like this.

Guys when I called her a Gay™ Disaster™ all the way back in the start I wasn't expecting to actually be correct. I was like half joking when I said that????

I WAS TRYING TO BE FUNNY I WASNT TRYING TO BE A PROPHET HERE WHAT THE FUCK WHY WAS I ACTUALLY CORRECT¿???????¿¿¿¿¿???

I WAS JUST BEING A GOOF WHY DID I END UP HAVING THE GIFT OF PROPHECY???? FUCK OFF APOLLO.

PEARL & ROSE WERE APPARENTLY 'VERY CLOSE FRIENDS'. ROOMMATES OR WHATNOT. SHE EVEN FUCKING BLUSHED & HAD THE QUEER™ EYELASHES. DAMN PEARL I THINK YOU MIGHT BE SUFFERING FROM A CASE OF BEING A FUCKING SIMP, YOU FUCKING LESBIAN™.

MY GAYDAR™ IS OFF THE CHARTS RIGHT NOW. THIS MF IS GAY™ AS FUCK. 💀 THIS IS BEYOND NORMAL GAY™. THIS IS ADVANCED GAY™.

So idk what happened that led to Rose vetting with Greg but yeah, suddenly I'm realizing Pearl disliking Greg is definitely a case of her being....

Well. And excuse me for the vulgar metaphor here but I can't resist.

Pearl is bitter because Greg was the one who got to put the sword in Rose's Scabbard when she wanted to put her sword in there in the first place.

And honestly if I lost out to someone like Greg who....let's face it is kind of a pretty shit dad so far. Yeah I'd be bitter too. It actually makes the fact she's the one trying the hardest to be Steven's mother make more sense & honeslty it makes her even more sympathetic. He's the closest thing she has left of Rose & the fact she's so caring & all just....if Rose had to sacrifice herself for Steven to exist, the fact Pearl isn't resentful towards Steven at all for that is so nice. Because it'd be so easy for the writers to just have her be like that for cheap drama but no, they don't. Thank you for that writers. That's so wise to avoid that bullshit bc I'd hate this episode if they went that direction....look idk how to word this rn but damn Pearl has some serious emotional issues. And Amethyst had some trauma reveal a few episodes ago too....

So if this pattern continues....

Guys I don't even know if I want to find out what fucked up shit Garnet is going through because I feel like hers is probably gonna be the most fucked up of the lot. Like I don't even think I WANT to find out what shit she's carrying in her head. I mean....like, fuck all of these people need therapy & a hug.

Anyways Pearl was definitely being shitty by the halfway mark (I mean what she said to Steven was legit fucked up I ain't gonna lie, like, damn, you said that to a CHILD, Pearl. Holy shit. I get that you're upset about the wife thing but he's literally a child I think he's probably upset about his mom being gone just as much as you are.) but y'know-

Okay quick side note: Amethyst I get that Pearl was being shitty but you have no right to be talking shit about her like you didn't just do some pretty fucked up shit just a couple episodes ago. Neither of y'all are in ANY position to be acting all high & mighty. Pearl just SAID something but you straight up fucking used your transformation magic to torment a man about his dead wife. You don't have any fucking high ground here girl. Garnet is the only one of you that has any room to be acting above it. She hasn't done anything like that so far so she's the only one that gets to talk shit. Sit tf down ma'am.

ahem, anyways Amethyst was being shitty too just a bit ago. And like I said then: when you're that mentally fucked it leads to that kinda behavior. It's not an excuse but it does mean you know there's a legit reason for why they'd act out like this. And it's not entirely their fault that they have a tendency to be that irrational. But Pearl, like Amethyst, you can tell she felt remorse.

Again, the way they resolve it without a drawn out argument...but instead it's just Pearl openly showing her vulnerability & Steven just showing her a sign of affection. No argument. No yelling. Just a genuine moment of sincere emotion. Steven understood. While what she said was horrible, he gets why she said it. They both miss her. But they have eahcother. I am going to fucking sob typing this oh my god.

Yeah this episode made me cry a lot. Absolutely stellar episode. And the ending was just beautiful.

Further cementing the fact that Pearl is my favorite. I can't wait to see how much the show uses her emotional baggage to rip my heart in half & stomp on it mercilessly.

Second best episode of the entire show so far. Only just slightly behind 'On The Run'. (That one just hit me on a more personal level so it still has my heart by the throat.)

[thebreakfastgenie]

Hawkeye, 2,3,5,9 :3c

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

I mean really where to begin, I could go with anything, but I'm going to highlight something I think doesn't get enough attention in fandom: I like that he's cool. Hawkeye is the big man on campus. He's popular. Guys like him, Radar looks up to him as a male role model (bad idea but also maybe good idea), women adore him, the man gets laid all the time. He's very good at his job, so he's respected professionally, but he's also well-liked. He's well-liked because he's funny, hot, friendly, and usually nice. He's also kind, but he's nice to people, too, unless he feels they've earned derision (e.g. they support the army). Hawkeye is a chad! He's also very anti-establishment. I've called him a jock before but I think he's more of a greaser. A hero to the students, despised by the principal (beloved by the cool teacher, Henry). This is a really important part of the show. If Hawkeye were an underdog outsider it wouldn't have the same impact that he hates the army so much. MASH uses his strong social position to communicate the morality of the show, which is topsy-turvy by conventional standards. He loves sex, booze, and gambling, he breaks rules and flouts authority, but he's morally right because he knows war is wrong. And through loving Hawkeye, maybe we start to think about whether sex, booze, and gambling are really so bad, whether rules shouldn't be broken sometimes, whether authority shouldn't be questioned. I like that he's the popular kid.

3. Least favorite canon thing about this character?

This one is really hard because even the bad things make him a better character to me... I genuinely don't even mind that he's kind of sexist, like, I'd be surprised if he wasn't. I guess my least favorite thing is some of the attempts at character development... I don't mind Hawkeye being less interested in casual sex (for him as a character, I actually do kind of mind the show going that direction in the conservative 80s because nothing exists in a vacuum) but the way it's handled in Who Knew totally sucks. He says he always made sure the women he slept with knew he'd be gone if they wanted a more serious relationship... that's what you're supposed to do! That's being honest! It's okay to only want casual sex and the way it's framed suggests it's not! But I think if they'd gone the other way, and had Hawkeye actually take advantage of women by implying he was open to something more serious than he really was (as is implied early on, although there's often subtext that the nurses are just in it for fun too which softens it a lot) it would come off too gross and make him too unlikable.

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?

Honestly the first song is Saturday in the Park by Chicago because of GFA. July 4th, 1953 was a Saturday! Required viewing courtesy of @movietonight:

Other than that... I just checked my MASH characters as Billy Joel songs post and I gave Hawkeye I Go to Extremes which makes sense. I also associate Teachers by Leonard Cohen and Fourth of July by Sufjan Stevens with him.

9. Could you be roommates with this character?

Yes, but if we had a third roommate that person would kill us both. Our place would be disgusting, but neither one of us would get mad at the other about it because we'd both be equally responsible. We'd be complete disasters but I think we'd have fun.

[haveyoureadthistransbook]

Grese Bats by Archie Bongiovanni

goodreads

So, no one told you life was gonna be this gay! Grease Bats stars Andy, a trans genderqueer individual who is both tough and loving, and their BFF Scout, an all-feelings-all-the-time mistake-maker.  Andy and Scout are best buds, roommates, and gay disasters. Along with their friends and plenty of beer, they’re just trying to make it through their 20s, survive late capitalism, and navigate the dating world. Tough and loving Andy is a genderqueer trans individual, who dates like there’s no tomorrow, while Scout, an all-feelings-all-the-time mistake-maker, is still languishing over her ex-girlfriend…from like two years ago.

Mod opinion: I haven't read this graphic novel myself yet but I might check it out at some point.

[cataztrophi]

TAZ Balance 12: First

Just three more entries to reach my goal for @taznovembercelebration this year! My card for this entry was "first," so this is a silly one about new experiences!

“Oh my God this is a disaster,” Kravitz groaned, doubling over in an attempt to calm his anxious stomach. 

“It doesn’t sound that bad,” Magnus said from his desk chair, where he'd been watching Kravitz pace their dorm room for the past 10 minutes.

“I can't believe I let you talk me into this.”

Magnus shrugged. “You said you wanted to get more confident. I thought trying out for the play would help.”

“I know.” Kravitz sounded miserable. “And it was a good idea, but I thought I'd be getting a bit part! Like one of those fairies with one line, or maybe a tree?”

“Wait, isn't it good that they gave you a bigger part? They liked your audition!”

Kravitz straightened up and started pacing again, his stomach still twisting itself in knots. He'd thought the same thing, too, when he first saw the cast list. Kravitz knew his competitive nature could be a blessing and a curse, but he thought he'd successfully harnessed it for good when he spent hours perfecting his monologue to audition for A Midsummer Night's Dream. Now it felt more like he'd been building his own guillotine. 

“It's not that I don't appreciate being cast as king of the faeries,” Kravitz began slowly, wondering how much he could tell Magnus before triggering his excitable-golden-retriever-man instincts. “It's just that, well, there's the whole thing with Titania, and pretending to be in a relationship thing, and they said there might be a kiss scene….”

Realization dawned on Magnus’s face. “And you think it's going to be weird kissing a girl?”

This was so far away from what Kravitz was worried about that it almost pulled him out of his anxiety spiral. “No! Well, that might have been a little awkward, but….” He was too deep into it now. There was no way he'd avoid spilling his guts. “They didn't cast a girl.”

Magnus frowned. “Oh. Okay, who did they cast, then?”

“Taako.”

He looked more confused than ever now. “What’s wrong with Taako?”

Nothing, Kravitz's brain replied instantly. Taako was absolutely perfect, and that was the problem. 

“No, it’s not that there’s something wrong with him, it’s just… well, kissing anyone for a show feels weird to me, and I don’t want to make him uncomfortable, and-” And the thought of kissing Taako made him go weak at the knees.

“Oh. Well, I wouldn’t worry too much about that. Taako’s a professional, he’s been acting since he was like… ten or something? So he’s not gonna feel weird about it.”

Kravitz knew he was a professional, of course; he’d been to every show Taako had been cast in. He’d even worked up the courage to bring flowers to the last one, although he had been so dazzled when Taako came out after the show that he essentially just stood there for five minutes before thrusting them in his direction and walking away. And now Taako had to kiss the guy he probably only knew as “Magnus’s weird roommate who almost hit me in the face with roses and lilies.”

“Maybe I should quit the show?” Kravitz suggested, without much hope.

“Aww, come on, Kravitz!” Magnus said, in his cheerful pep talk voice. “The only way out is through. You’ll be great!”

Kravitz opened his mouth to refute this when he heard a knock at their door. He didn’t think they were expecting anybody. He looked at Magnus, who shrugged. 

Kravitz walked over and peered warily out of the peephole. His heart lurched when he saw Taako’s warm eyes and bright, gap-toothed smile staring back at him.

“It’s Taako,” he hissed, panicked.

Magnus shrugged. “So let him in.” He stood up and began tossing things in his backpack. Kravitz debated whether he could just pretend he wasn’t home until Taako went away.

“Hey, either you let him in or I will, buddy,” Magnus told him. Right, right. He was being silly. He unlocked the door, took a deep breath, and pulled it open.

“What’s up, lover?” Taako asked, then burst into a fit of laughter at Kravitz’s no-doubt panicked face. 

“Uh,” he said as Taako stepped into the room.

“I just thought that, since you’re playing my eternal paramour now, we should, you know, chat a bit. Talk about how we’re seeing the characters.”

“I’m heading to class,” Magnus said cheerily, slinging his backpack over his shoulder. “You two have fun!”

Kravitz knew for a fact that Magnus didn’t have class for another forty minutes, but he couldn’t call attention to that without risking a barrage of pointed questions about why Magnus thought he needed time alone with Taako. Instead he stood there in silent betrayal as Magnus waved goodbye and closed the door behind him.

“Uh,” Kravitz said again. He watched Taako sit down on his bed and smile up at him. Taako had been in their room before, but always as Magnus’s friend, and never with just Kravitz. 

“So, Mags tells me you’ve never really acted before.”

“Yeah,” Kravitz said, grateful to have finally latched onto the English language again. “Just never really got the chance.”

“Well, you clearly blew your audition out of the water! Oberon’s a tough one to land, you gotta have that certain… je ne sais quoi, you know?”

Kravitz nodded like he had any idea what any of that meant. “Right, yeah.”

“Anyway,” Taako dragged the conversation forward valiantly. “I know people can sometimes get hang-ups about touching other actors, romance, kissing, stuff like that.” He said this all very casually, as though he wasn’t cracking open everything Kravitz was currently shaking with anxiety about. “So I just wanted to chat about what you’re comfortable with, any total nopes, whatevs.”

He looked at Kravitz, waiting for a reply. Kravitz couldn’t think of anything he didn’t want to do with Taako, just not necessarily in front of an audience. The problem was trying to find a reasonable human answer to Taako’s question that didn’t make him seem either against the concept of touching in general or just ridiculously horny.

“You okay?” Taako asked, after a few minutes of silence in which Kravitz was completely incapable of developing a non-objectionable response.

“Um, yeah, I’m fine.” Surely the best policy was to be honest, at least to some degree. “You’re right, though, I don’t have a lot of experience with this, so I’m… sort of nervous about all of it.”

“For sure.” He stretched his arms up over his head, his shoulders popping, the motion pulling up his crop top to reveal more of his perfectly freckled stomach. Kravitz fixed his eyes on the wall behind Taako’s head to keep himself from staring at the strip of soft hair that disappeared into his jeans. “If it would help, we could always do a few practice runs before rehearsal.”

“We could- what?” Surely Kravitz had misunderstood him. There was no way this gorgeous man was suggesting they should practice kissing each other.

“Practice it. The physical stuff, so we’re not trying to work it all out during rehearsal.”

“Practice… kissing?”

Taako shrugged. “Sure, why not?”

Kravitz needed to lie down. He needed to lie down with his feet elevated for at least 30 minutes until his brain started getting properly oxygenated again. 

“If it makes you uncomfy we don’t have to,” Taako said, possibly misreading whatever dumbstruck look was on his face at the moment.

“No!” Much too loud, much too fast. What was wrong with him? “I mean, I think it’s a good idea. Get used to it, you know?” He’d definitely like to get used to kissing Taako. But this was a Professional Acting kind of kiss, and he shouldn’t be weird about it! He absolutely shouldn’t be looking at Taako’s lips already and thinking about how soft and kissable they looked.

“Cool, cool, let’s get to it, then!” Taako stood up and clapped his hands together. “Do you wanna take it from your line?”

“Oh, right.” Kravitz cast about his desk for a moment until he located his script. He had already gone through it and highlighted all his lines, plus highlighting his stage directions and cues in different colors. He flipped through the book until he found Act 4 Scene 1, then cleared his throat a few times.

“Don’t be afraid to really go for it, my fella,” Taako said encouragingly. “Taako’s all about enthusiasm.”

Kravitz stared at him, his face burning. “You-” He cleared his throat a final time and tried again. “You mean the lines, right?”

Taako shrugged. “Those too, I guess.”

“Um, right.” Kravitz took a deep breath, praying that he wasn’t about to look like a complete fool, and began. “‘Sound music. Come, my queen, take hands with me, and rock the ground whereon these sleepers be.’” His whole body hot with embarrassment, Kravitz extended a hand. Taako took it delicately, his head held high as he channeled the haughty elegance of a fae queen. Kravitz was already mesmerized by him.

Taako stepped in closer, and Kravitz leaned down to give him a peck on the lips before immediately drawing back again.

“Um, was that okay?” he asked, while Taako looked startled that it had ended so quickly.

“Uh, yeah, my dude, not bad for a first try. But you know, we’re supposed to be like, fae-married, right? You can put a little more oomph in there if you’re comfy with it. Taako’s down with whatever, cha’boy’s pretty chill about this stuff.”

Kravitz could feel himself beginning to spiral again. Was Taako going to think he was a bad actor now? Or a bad kisser? Oh God, was he a bad kisser?

“Hey,” Taako said, his voice gentler now, pulling Kravitz from his thoughts. His face was earnest, and more serious than Kravitz was used to. “It’s okay if it’s weird, alright? This stuff is pretty weird if you think about it too long. But I think you’re a pretty good dude, Krav, and I don’t think you’d make me uncomfortable on purpose. And if you do it on accident? We’ll talk about it and figure it out. Sound good?”

Some of the panic in his chest loosened slightly. He took a deep breath, and let it out. “Yeah, sounds good. Sorry, if I’m–”

Taako shook his head. “Ain’t no sorry, my man. Besides, acting should be fun! You gotta get a little wild with it sometimes, you know?”

Kravitz nodded. “Okay. Okay, I think I’m ready to try it again.”

“Let’s take it from the top, kemosabe!”

He repeated his line, inviting Titania to dance, and held out his hand again. He tried to get more into character this time, imagining himself as a proud and commanding faerie king. When Taako took his hand he pulled him in close, and he heard him let out a soft breath as their chests collided. His other hand went to the small of Taako’s back as though in preparation for a waltz. He took his time, lowering his face slowly towards Taako’s, and he saw Taako’s lips part slightly, his eyes dark and sparkling with something Kravitz couldn’t place. He lingered in the kiss, and this time he allowed himself to savor the feeling of Taako’s lips on his, soft and yielding and perfect. In the instant before he pulled away, he felt Taako’s teeth catch against his lower lip.

“Was that better?” he asked, his voice rough. Taako was breathing hard, open-mouthed, his cheeks turning pink as he looked up at Kravitz.

“Yeah,” he said finally, still breathless. “Much- much better.”

Neither one of them stepped away from the embrace. Kravitz’s heart thundered in his chest as he became aware of the way Taako’s body was pressed into his, with no sign of him wanting to move. All Kravitz wanted was to kiss him again.

“You know,” Taako said after a moment, “they say practice makes perfect.” He leaned up towards Kravitz for another kiss.

[lnc2]

i know this won't sound like a revelation and i mean maybe it's not because of course i've known i've been living it but like

pet death is so fucking painful and real and constant

like losing rory was like losing a part of myself and even when i was at my worst (hospitalized) i still felt guilty for being so distraught and even though it's been nearly six years this december i'm still so easily triggered and can be set off if i'm not expecting certain reminders or anniversaries and like

yeah a bunch of other things happened around that time and the way it happened really cemented the Trauma and deeply embedded it into my body but i don't cry for my pets from childhood the way i do for rory

and i think about losing toby and i just... can't handle it?

and i've finally accepted or believe even though i've always Known it's because they're with me always. like your pets, especially the ones that are v present and interact w you in a v real way and are so smart and have their own personalities, they're yours, they're your kid, they're your best friend

i don't spend time with anyone the way i spend time w my dogs. i told/tell them everything, i schedule my days around them.

good morning toby, how's my boy, are you hungry, did you sleep well? i have a doctor's appt today, i'm anxious about this, can i have a hug? do you want to go to the park? let's watch a movie, i have to go out of town but i love you, are you feeling okay? do i need to take you to the vet? am i just being crazy? is this my trauma or my instincts telling me you're sick?

every year with him is one more year without her and one more year closer to being without him and just

i grieved rory the week she died before the accident even happened just sobbing like i'd lost her even though i had no reason to and didn't even know why i was crying and then i lost her bc no one believed me when i said she was sick and i didn't advocate or fight hard enough for her until it was too late.

so now toby slips when trying to jump on the sofa or sighs too much or his nose is runny or whatever and i'm on the verge of a panic attack and calling my mom to make sure i'm not being crazy before i schedule an emergency vet appt and just how do i know what's my trauma and what's my instincts? i don't know when to trust myself anymore all while knowing i can only trust myself.

i'm neurotic about his health, his environment, who he's with. if i can't have him in a place i can 100% control and guarantee is safe then i want him with people i know will take his safety as seriously as i do because they know if something happens to him i will lose it, catastrophically, wholly, entirely.

there are ways rory is still with me that are good and then there are ways that are very much... not.

idk if it's just because it was her and the how and when of it all but the end result was just complete and total devastation of my entire world. and i know it will be the same with him so even though he's happy and (hopefully please god hopefully) healthy i spend most of my time worrying that i'm not doing enough even though all he wants to do is to lay at my feet and play tug of war.

maybe it's bc i live alone, but idts i was crazy about her even when we lived w roommates, and i know i'd be the same with toby and i don't even know if i could trust someone to live with us anyways because would they see all the potential disasters as naturally as i do and make sure nothing happens? would they care like i do?

idk. rory's birthday was this past week and i was so exhausted from wedding stuff i don't think i was feeling any of it consciously but i'm feeling it tonight bc anniversaries are really hard even the happy ones, even so many years later.

everything with rory was a fight and a challenge (so so worth it, i've never connected w anyone spiritually like i did with that damn dog) and toby for all his size and sometimes annoyingness and for all that i resisted loving him the first year i had him is mostly so easy even when you think he shouldn't be. idk what it says about either of them but i think the universe sent him to me because they knew i needed a hardy dog, one that was sturdy even though he is a giant baby, and one that would take my anxiety and just let it roll off of him because everything after that left me so so fragile.

i'm sad she would have been eight. i'm said she never saw three. toby is five and will be six. numbers like these play through my head always. i've had him longer than i had her and yet and yet and yet

i keep telling myself i shouldn't still be crying this many years gone but it feels so new and so now whenever i think of her so i try not to think of her (my therapist says it's PTSD) but then i only remember the bad and not the many, many good.

it's okay i'm still sad, or something stronger than that. i love her and that's good and it's okay to cry. toby is taking care of me and i'm taking care of him and hopefully in many many many years they'll take care of each other.

i just needed to get this out, somewhere, i know it's disjointed and doesn't have a point but so are my feelings and i just wanted to acknowledge them even if it was only to myself

[misty-lake101]

Live and Learn AU - Headcanons

Hey guys! I haven't updated Live and Learn for moment cause life has been so busy and now I have COVID which absolutely sucks! But I am trying to work on the next few chapters. I'm not sure how long it will be, but until then, I thought I'd give y'all some headcanons in the meantime! They mainly pertain to everyone's career choices and house habits so you'll get an idea of their dynamic.

Sonic - Major: Sports Communication

Sonic cannot cook. Period. All of his roommates agree that leaving him unsupervised in the kitchen is a fire hazard. He tends to order takeout more and microwaves leftovers. But as he got older and was forced to manage his money a little more, he did learn a few basic things at least. The fact that he’s on a meal plan with the college helps as there are some places that serve decent food. Given how athletic he is, It’s a wonder he’s managed to stay healthy this whole time.

He’s also a huge slob. His room is a disaster and he’s the type to just throw his clothes on the floor when he gets back, and then toss it in the laundry at the last minute. He's also that person who can easily find items in a messy room, but feels lost when the place is sparkling clean.

Sonic and Shadow were on rival sports teams in high school. They didn’t see each other for awhile after graduation, but then meet again when Shadow transfers to GMU and becomes their roommate.

Silver - Major: Pre-medicine

Grew up in foster care, and therefore not used to treating a place like his own home. He used to always have a mindset of ‘I'm in someone else’s house and have to follow their rules’. Moving in with Sonic changed that for the better, of course. But of all the inhabitants, he is the most flexible as far as habits go. Like Sonic, his own room can get pretty messy, but he's more conscious of others and therefore a little better at keeping common spaces clean.

He mostly relies on his college’s meal plan but over time, is trying to learn how to cook. He's pretty bad at it too, but it's more because no one taught him anything. Espio uses his restaurant job to his advantage to help him in this area.

His sleep cycle can be a mess since he works night shift for his job. Keeping days of the week and dates straight is often a challenge and he often has to be reminded that no, it's Saturday morning - not Friday night. His daily routine depends on his class/work schedule or what he feels like doing that day. Without that as some kind of structure, he can have almost no concept of time

Shadow - Forensics, but at some point, Undecided

Being in military school and having a strict guardian as well as a chronically ill and severely immunocompromised sister resulted in some extreme habits for Shadow.

He is the epitome of a neat freak. Every nook and corner of the house will be subject to a good vacuuming and mopping if he can help it. He’s an early riser and has a specific morning routine. Comically, these things end up being a source of conflict between him and Sonic when he first moves in.

Unlike Sonic and Silver, Shadow is very good at cooking and becomes the de-facto chef of the house. He's very adept at everything from basic to gourmet meals and knows how to tailor in dietary restrictions of all kinds. He also won't allow anyone but Amy to help him out in the kitchen.

Amy - Nursing, but is thinking of changing her career

At the start of the story, Amy's life was a bit of a mess before she moved in with Sonic and Silver. She lived with three girls in another house and they were generally pretty awful to her, as was her boyfriend. After thirteen months of that, she moved out early when the stress reached a boiling point.

Yet in terms of house habits, she (and to a certain extent, Silver too) is the obligatory "how am I the most normal one here???"

She generally gets along with everyone. Though she and Sonic dated briefly in school, there's no bad blood between them and they're good friends. She bonds very quickly with Silver since they're both in the medical field and can understand each other's struggles that are unique to that career. Silver also looks to her a lot for dating advice. Amy has a pretty civil relationship with Shadow and they gradually become very good friends as well.

Her house habits don't really have anything too extraordinary about them. She's pretty good with cleaning up after her self and is flexible with others. Amy's expectations aren't very high beyond, "please clean up after yourself" and "don't do the nasty in shared spaces and leave 'evidence' of it".

When Shadow first moved in, he and Sonic would bicker a lot. Amy did her best to stay out of it, but there were times she had to intervene. When this happened, she and Silver would take turns deciding who would be the one to break them up.

[thethistlegirlwrites]

♔ : Finding the other wearing their clothes

♜: Shoulder rubs

♥: Reacting to the other one crying about something

♦: Slow dancing

For Sierra and Shay (you know why I sent that last one 😉)

Ah my precious human (and non-human) dumpster fire disasters I love them dearly and I know you do too... they got long so once again they're below the cut!

"Is that my sweatshirt?"

"Correction. Our sweatshirt," Sierra replies.

"I didn't realize communal property extended to my clothes."

"I did the laundry this week, so yeah."

"No fair. I can't steal your stuff on my week."

"You could, but it would be kind of funny." She chuckles at the thought of Shay in one of her t-shirts; it would look like a crop top on him.

Between her chronically broke bank account and landlords' (unfortunately still fully legal) refusals to take on a vampire with a criminal record as a tenant, she and Shay had finally decided the most practical option was sharing her place. A one-bedroom apartment isn't a lot of room for two people, but with a coffin of home earth replacing the dilapidated college-purchase futon in the living room, they're making it work.

They're splitting the rent fifty-fifty, Sierra buys food (as the only one who actually needs it) and Shay takes care of utilities. They trade off on the chores. Pete made them a literal actual chore chart for the fridge.

He sure does love his spreadsheets.

"Well, I'm not going to fight you for it," Shay says, grinning and reaching past her to the blood shelf in the fridge.

"I'd hate to have to reset the 'Days Without Incident' board," Sierra says. They literally have one of those too, courtesy of her and Shay's tendency to ruffle each other's feathers and say things that set the other off. If they make it to seven days, it's cause for celebration.

'We haven't murdered each other yet' seems like a pretty low bar for roommates, but Sierra thinks that in this case, it's actually a pretty good one. They're living (or maybe undead, in Shay's case) proof that humans and vampires can co-exist.

And in a world where that's becoming increasingly important to prove, 'we survived another day together' might be one of the most valuable statistics they have.

She's pretty sure, somewhere, Pete has all of this on a spreadsheet. ... "Isn't it a little weird to be visiting a graveyard after hours?" Pete asks, glancing behind them at the chained gate.

"Well, I sort of wanted you all to meet him, and Shay can only come at night. Besides, unless they've changed their tactics a lot in the past couple years almost no one patrols this place. My high school friends and I used to come out here when we wanted to be sure no one would catch us drinking or smoking." She shrugs. "Now it feels kinda weird knowing I could have been sitting on my dad's headstone that time Javy convinced me to try my first cigarette."

Shay laughs, a sort of harsh sound that echoes off the stones. "Okay, you have to admit, that is pretty funny."

Sierra stops in front of a rough-cut, unassuming stone. It's probably from the ranch; her dad was the first generation not allowed to be buried in the family plot on their own land, but his family clearly wanted to leave a piece of his home with them.

It's like some inverted theory of home earth. Sierra kneels down, tracing the letters cut into the stone.

"Hey dad. It's me again. I brought friends this time. Well, better friends than I used to bring." She swallows, feeling warmth running down her night-chilled cheeks. "This is Pete, and this is Shay. Pete's my hunting partner. And Shay's a vampire but I think you might have liked him." She shrugs. "If it counts for anything, your brother doesn't actively hate him."

It's supposed to come out as a laugh, but it's more of a choked sob. "Nice to meet you, Mr. Stoker. Gotta say, you've got an awfully nice grave. Take it from someone that means something to." Shay lays a hand on top of the headstone, and this time, Sierra does laugh.

She knows what he's doing, but she doesn't mind. She'd rather laugh than cry, she thinks her dad would approve.

Pete just shuffles, clearly not as comfortable with the whole joking in the presence of the actual dead thing, but he takes a sprig of mesquite bush he'd found on the ranch earlier and lays it on top of the stone, tied around with a thin bit of red string. Apparently that's something from his family.

"Okay. We have two more to visit before we leave." Sierra leads the way to a pair of low graves with simple small stones at the heads, in a weedy, neglected corner.

"Who's here?" Pete asks.

"These were the graves of the vampires I staked." Sierra traces a finger over the stones. "When they died in a gang war, they were unclaimed and ended up buried here." Their ashes are scattered somewhere in the desert now, but it still means something to her to see the place they should have been laid to rest.

"Most hunters believe, on some level at least, that killing a vampire is simply freeing their soul. Like those stories about ghosts who are only trapped because they have unfinished business, and solving it helps them cross over." Sierra says. "But I didn't know that then. I didn't care about giving them peace, or freeing them. I just wanted them dead because I thought they were monsters."

"So what do you think? Am I a tortured soul you're doing a disservice to by letting me live?" Shay smiles a bit, fangs showing. "Would we both be better off if you freed me?"

"I think you could say the same thing to justify killing a human," Sierra replies. "As long as this life is what you want, I have no right to take it from you."

Pete taps Sierra on the shoulder and then points toward the entrance. "Lights."

He's right, a car is coming, and the way the road curves is going to send those lights right over all three of them.

"Okay, let's get out of here." ... Sierra parks in the lot of the library and glances at her passenger. The sun has been down for at least an hour, but Shay still looks nervous about getting out of the car.

"You still want to do this?"

He just nods.

Cody has been supplementing the LAPL's "Human Library Books" program with his suggestion of "(Non) Human Library" since they got the event off the ground. Robin's gone to almost all of them. Uncle John says Emma has gone a few times, when the events are in the evening late enough for her to feel comfortable going out but early enough she doesn't have to run her club.

But it's Shay's first time.

"I'm pretty sure half of the agency's going to be here. If anyone tries to harass you or pull something we'll deal with it." She's heard stories of people 'checking out' vampires only to try and poison them with garlic or expose them to UV light. There's a security process now, to make sure they're not carrying stakes or any other harmful items, but that doesn't mean someone can't get disturbingly creative.

"I'm not worried about that." He shrugs. "I just...I don't usually tell people about my past. Before I turned. They either pity me or start looking at me like somehow being an addict was worst than being a vampire." He tugs at the cuff of a sleeve. "If they ask what it's like to be me now, I can answer anything, but if they ask how it happened or what that was like..."

Sierra reaches across the car to rest her hands on his shoulders. The tension in his muscles is vibrating like an idling engine, and she rubs her thumbs into the back of his neck, hoping to ease it.

"You told me. And Pete."

"Yeah."

"And we don't treat you any different."

"Well, to be fair, I don't think it was going to get worse than handcuffed in the back seat of a Camaro."

"You are never going to let that one go, are you?"

He laughs. Halfhearted, but still real. "Nope."

"My point is, the people coming here, if they're being genuine, want to understand other people. They're not coming here to judge you. They're coming to learn what it's like to be you."

"Okay." He opens the car door. "Maybe you're right. I mean, I got to ride up front this time."

Sierra slaps his shoulder. "Okay, go on, get out of my car. I'm right behind you." ... "I don't think I fully realized what finding out I was a Stoker was going to involve," Sierra mutters, tugging at the flowing skirt of her gala dress. "Apparently I'm expected to represent my family name by showing up to this shindig in an evening gown." 

"Well, you are basically ribbon-cutting this program," Pete says, adjusting his own tie. "It was your idea."

"I threw it at Maira and ran out her door. Figuratively. I had nothing to do with the past two years." She swishes the extravagant skirt around her ankles. It's not terrible, it's only ankle length and the slit side allows her both freedom of movement and access to the stake holster on her thigh, but she still doesn't have to like it. "They just want me here because I'm the legacy name with a connection to it. I'm going to trip over this thing and make a fool of myself."

"Well, that would certainly liven things up around here," Shay says.  "Stop it." Sierra slaps his arm gently. 

"Okay, go on, they're waiting for you." Pete says, tapping her arm and pointing her toward the stage.

She doesn't trip on anything, or mix up the notecards on the podium, but she's still glad when her speech is over and the actual party gets started. Even if she's not much for the dancing that picks up once dinner is over.

At least John convinced their DJ to include some Tejano in the mix. If she closes her eyes she can almost see her parents dancing to it playing on the Camaro's radio, in some empty field.

She's still in her seat, watching Pete tripping over his own feet trying to keep up with Saanvi, one of his fellow forensic accountants, when Shay pushes his own chair back from the table, stands up, and holds out his hand. "Would you like to dance?"

"Do you know how?"

"Do you?"

"Fair point. I know line dancing." Sierra motions to the room full of people. "And this is not it."

"Then it's perfect. Neither of us knows what we're doing and I think we're both coordinated enough to avoid stomping each other's feet." 

The current song ends just as they step out onto the floor, and the new one is slower and softer. Sierra curses under her breath. She could fake her way through something high energy and upbeat. She's not good at calm and graceful.

She settles for sort of leaning into Shay's arm and swaying, moving incrementally like she's trying to keep the floor from creaking under her shoes.

It's actually not terrible, once she catches onto the rhythm and the music's tone, and eventually, as it grows louder and stronger, her steps gain confidence, until by the last few powerful notes she feels confident enough to spin out to the end of their connected grip and then whirl back to finish the song how they started, leaning against each other but not quite touching.

She looks up, wiping back an errant strand of hair that's escaped her neat bun, to see there's a circle of several feet of space all around them and most of the other people on the floor have stopped dancing.

Shay seems to have realized the same thing.

"Are they all watching us?"

"A vampire and a Stoker sharing the dance floor, as partners no less. This is probably real life 'Beauty and the Beast' to them," Sierra says.  Shay chuckles, and Sierra leans into his shoulder as the song ends.

[lackablazeical]

God can't imagine the after math to end well, mikeys a mama's Boi and already doesn't like usagi, donnies also cares(at least wants her approval) and splinter(not need to elaborate) and how would usagi feel,I mean his place in the family is already in a weird and awkward position,and being the indirect cause of one bm death?

All this to say, family dinner will be awkward afterwards

HAHAHAHHHAAHAHHAHA no. It wouldn't go well at all. But, in the end, Leo has the final say. Leo could put his brothers down if he wanted to, and they know it.

Mikey, Don, and Splints would be distraught. Splinter wouldn't really be angry, just completely crushed, Mikey and Don would be tho. Absolutely furious. Mikey would definitely blame Usagi, but i'd be surprised if he stuck around at all. He'd probably leave to live somewhere else, away from all of that. Donnie would stay but I can't imagine the disaster twins relationship would ever improve or really be repairable at all. More like unwilling roommates at that point.

Raph would honestly side with the majority. He thinks Leo ripped apart his family for someone he's only known a bit more then a year or two. How dare he?

Usagi would definitely have to watch his back. Dealing with BM and a furious Leo is already traumatic enough, but the rest of the Hamatos also at his throat? I'd be surprised if his poor rabbit heart could take it :-)