#I guess you could say she really FELL for Raph

[fabuloustrash05]

no need to answer this, but i wanted to know how in your opinion rise raph and monalisa would meet for the first time!!! i have my version of rise monalisa i get all silly weighing on how they would meet!!!

I’ve actually already discussed this before with how Rise Raph would meet my version of Rise Mona Lisa, but I’ll share it again but with more detail and some dialogue!

The story starts with Raphael and Michelangelo deciding they want to have a fun night out together, big bro little bro bonding time. Mikey convinces Raph to “borrow” Donnie’s Turtle Tank and go for a joy ride in the Hidden City, get some pizza and just goof off and have a fun time. Raph is unsure, but Mikey is able to convince him by giving him his puppy eyes. Out in the Hidden City, Raph and Mikey have a blast driving around in the Turtle Tank, but then they crash. The Turtle Tank is practically destroyed and the two brothers panic. Donnie is going to kill them if he finds out they wrecked his car, so they gotta find someone who can fix it and fast!

Lucky, not too far from where they are, Raph and Mikey find a car repair shop in the Hidden City called “Sal’s Garage”. Pushing the Turtle Tank with all their strength, they bring it to the shop where they meet the owner, a blue tongued skink Yokai named Salvatore, or “Sal” for short. A kind older gentlemen who’s left eye is mysteriously missing (But that’s a story for another day). He greets the brothers and after inspecting the damages of their vehicle, he tells the boys that the vehicle is too advanced and high tech for an old man like him to fix. Raph and Mikey worry that they’ll have to tell Donnie the truth, but they Sal tells them that there is someone else who can help.

“My daughter can probably fix this up for you!” He tells them, “She’s around your age, but she’s very talented in mechanics. Maybe even more talented than me!”

Sal brings the two brothers with him in the back to find her. 

“Mona Lisa!” Sal calls out, “Where are you?”

“Up here, Dad!” 

Raph and Mikey look up to find up high on a lift, working on a car was a young blue tongued skink yokai girl, wearing dirty cargo pants, a grey tank top and a hot pink head scarf. 

“We have some customers with a very interesting car,” Sal tells her, “I think you would love to take a look at it.”

Mona looks up from her work, finally getting a good look at the Turtle Tank. Her eyes widened with amazement from the sight of such a beautiful and high tech car. It was unlike anything she’s ever seen before.

“Th-That’s a c-car?! It’s so- WOAH!!”

Lost in wonder from the sight of the vehicle, Mona loses her balances and falls off the car lift.

“MONA LISA!!” her father shouts.

Quickly Raph dashes under the lift, holding his hands out and catches Mona, saving her before she hits the ground. Mona opens her eyes, realizing she is unharmed, she looks up to see who saved her. 

“Are you alright?” Raph asked her, still holding her in his arms.

Mona’s eyes widen, seeing something even more amazing than the Turtle Tank. Her face started burning red as she felt her heart begin the beat face, wanting to burst from her chest. He was so handsome, his charming but gentle smile, the sweetness in his eyes as he looked at her, and his strong arms holding her, feeling safe and protected. 

“I am now...” Mona smiles, batting her eyes.

“That’s good!” Raph smiles, carefully putting Mona down, “And sorry for that. I don’t normally put my hands on a lady.”

Mona giggles, “It’s alright. Thank you for saving me. You’re, um, really strong...”

“Thanks! So, do you think you can fix our Turtle Tank? Your dad says you’re very talented.” 

“Well, I don’t like to brag, but yeah. I can fix it.”

“Great, cause we’re kinda in a hurry. Our brother Donnie is gonna lose it if he finds out it’s missing.”

“For a doll like you, I’ll get it done quickly. This will be a piece of cake,” She winks.

“Awesome! You are such a good friend, Mona!” 

As Mona goes to work to repair the Turtle Tank, Mikey looks at his big brother, glaring at him in shock from what he just witnessed.

“What?” Raph asked. 

“Did you not realize what just happened?”

“What??”

“Mona was flirting with you!”

Raph laughs, “Don’t be ridiculous, Mikey. Mona’s just being friendly.”

Mikey face palms himself, “Oh my god, he’s so oblivious...”

(And he continues to be oblivious for the next year...)

EDIT: I WROTE A FANFIC ON THIS!!

[tellmeallaboutit]

what is the deal with Hope?

All I know of her is the "cRaZy LaDy" you can ally with in the House of Hope level. Does she have any extra details to her story besides being Raphael's prisoner and Korrilla's sister? (in your opinion, if not in canon!)

Holy moly, Hope is something quite complicated indeed. Hope, first of all, is a product of scrapped original writing / creative redirections / House of Hope re-makings.

It’s extremely hard to analyze her because there are mixed signals in all possible directions. I’ll give the main three. All IMHO / headcanon.

1. Hope as a Concept / Poetical Allegory

Probably the original intention. Hope as some incorruptible entity, a concept, that Raphael stole and tried to destroy as a long-winded poetic metaphor and failed to do so.

2. Hope as a person

Hope is also a real dwarven cleric and the sister of Korilla. So, in this version, at one point Raphael thought “oh, neat name, so metaphorical, wanna serve me?”, Hope was like “nope, get fucked”, and then the only logical course of action for a lawful evil character was to throw respect for consent and rules out of the window, kidnap her, chain her in his basement, threaten her, torture her, subject her to some form of sexual assault (unclear what happened there or who did that, but something that deeply unsettled Hope and caused her to describe sexual acts she witnessed in a very disturbing manner).

Yeah, don’t ask me. I am pretty sure that goes against anything devils are supposed to stand for with actual trickery and seduction and gradual corruption. I guess the thought there was “devils only pretend to care about consent and be civil but look at what this guy is doing behind closed doors”. Behind closed doors, he threatens to drench a kidnapped girl in the intestines of a kid. Very edgelordy, Raph.

3. Hope as a romantic / sexual interest

At one point of development, it seemed like there was a sexual connotation in their relationship aka he wanted her as a woman aka an actual sexual creep locking an unwilling woman in his basement.

Clues: “taming hope” with lines like “he looks at her with such hatred and longing”, and also data-mined taming hope volume 3 where she actually refers to him as "flaccid horned-fuck" and his maggoty tongue in her ear, Raphael referring to himself as a hopeless romantic. The “hope ahaha such a tease” line also seems sexual as such context. I think the boudoir line (where Hope says she has been there, but not on her own will) was created during this stage, and then in act 3 chaos it was just left there because why not.

All in all, Hope writing is indeed a hot mess. She was supposed to symbolize how predatory, corrupt and rotten inside Raphael is, but the delivery of this story was rehashed so many times it fell really flat. I like the general idea of Hope, I think it could have been great, but the execution fell on the nose and is still lying there whimpering. I think my personal main take away from Hope story that Raph is obsessive, doesn’t really give a shit about consent (only on a extremely formal put your signature here or die level) and has strong yandere vibes.

Thank you for your ask ❤️

[tmntxthings]

一∑ Collection of Lies・゜・。

author’s note: it’s high time for something slightly fluffy, not all the way, but kinda sorta, at least not dead on heart-stomping angst right??? RIGHT???

warnings: crack, cursing, gaslighting, manipulation, slight angst, sprinkle of fluff, attempt at dry humor, unedited

word association: compulsive liars, denial, heartbreak, telephone-game, sarcasm, dramatic flair

song: “ 50 Ways to Die by Train ”

—————————————————————————

When you thought the next couple of weeks were going to be rough. You didn’t think people were going to call you worried about fatal accidents. Not once did this happen. Not twice. An unreasonable amount of times did your friends call you up, texted you, or even barged into your humble abode to question your wellbeing.

It had been heartwarming at first. Cute afterwards. And quickly became annoying and overplayed later on.

You hadn’t been to the lair in a week. You were busy watching a show when Mikey called your phone that night. You answered on the second ring, before you could speak a word, Mikey could be heard wailing. So much so you had to bring the phone away from your ear. You put it on speaker instead.

“Mikey?!?” You shouted over his sobs.

“Y-y/n?!!???!!?” He sounded surprised that you had answered. “Is that really you???” He was all sniffles. “Uh, yeah, you called me!” You reminded him.

“But I thought you were in a plane crash!” He exasperated. You were stunned to say the least. “What???” Was all you could think of.

“You went to Tahiti or at least tried to! But the plane went down and you died!” Michelangelo expounded further, only furthering your confusion. “Mikey, none of those things happened. Who told you that??”

The line went silent for a moment.

A moment more.

“Hello???” You said into the receiver wondering if the call was still going.

“Still here! Hmm! Looks like I got some things mixed up, whoopsy! OH— gotta go Y/n it’s Hypno—“

And just like that the line was dead.

Now that last bit was nothing out of the usual. The turtles all seemed to be perfectly fine with calling you during odd times like fighting a villain.

What was not normal was the death assumption?!

Whatever!

…

The next day.

Donatello texted you.

[ Is it true that you got crushed in the back of a garbage truck? ]

[ .-. no. wtf? ]

[ Thought so. Thanks. ]

[ hey, you can’t just drop that bomb and dip! ]

[ donnie??? ]

[ akwkcjkwpifiowpwjdeppqoddjqk ]

He didn’t text you back until you had just dropped the topic completely.

But you’ll never guess what happened the day after that. April checked up on you! Visiting your apartment, when you had opened the door to greet her, her face instantly looked relieved! Like she was expecting the worse.

“Hey April?” Long into the visit you decided to ask what had been bugging you. “You didn’t hear anything weird like I’d died in a plane or garbage truck did you?” You were sure April had been asked weirder questions.

“No no nothing like that!” She assured. But her eyes darted away after holding contact for three seconds. Your eyes narrowed quickly. “But?” You threw out.

“…but I heard you fell into a pool of cement mix..”

Your eyebrows couldn’t raise any further. Conveniently. Too conveniently. A call buzzed April’s phone, saying it was her mom and she had to rush back home. She spoke over all your hurried questions and thrown out accusations.

This was getting fucking weird!

And Raph, the last person to check-up, had no hopes of getting out of your questions. Because when he landed on your fire escape. Tapping on your window. You didn’t say a peep until he got inside your room. And just as quickly as you let him in, you locked the windowsill. Now you knew Raph could easily break down the wall if he wanted to escape. But that was the thing, he hadn’t really wanted to. In fact he looked pretty torn up whenever you asked who had spread the rumor “that you had been eaten by a lion.”

A fucking. LION. Where in New York City would I—

“At the zoo!” Raph said tapping his index fingers together meekly.

“Raph, just tell me what I want to hear.”

You had a pretty good guess as to who was behind what now but you needed the affirmation that you weren’t just going batshit crazy.

“It’s…”

“Well…”

You wanted to pull out your hair!! He was being torturously slow. “Spit it out Raphala!”

“Ever since last week Leo’s been acting so weird! And every time we ask why you’re not hanging around or coming over he keeps giving us these weirdly detailed responses about…well how you died!” He says this in one big breath, like he couldn’t get it out fast enough.

You had clued in on it being Leo, but it was just too childish. All because you had broken up with him? He was going this far??

Raph watched as the gears in your head turned. As your expression grew harsher. He cleared his throat. “Ya know.. Raph thinks Leo’s pretty torn up about the whole thing. He won’t admit that you two broke up. He’ll say anything other than that.”

Oh boy had he. Raph thought it was helping to provide the list of lies Leo had fed them all this past week, ‘That you had:

Met a shark underwater,

Drowned in a hot tub,

Fried getting a suntan,

Struck by lightning,

Fell down a flight of stairs,

Caught in a mudslide,

Run over by a crappy minivan,

Danced to death at an east-side night club.’

By the time Raph noticed this wasn’t helping whatever case he was trying to build he coughed and went back on track. “What Raph is trying to say, is Leo’s in denial. Bad. What happened between you two?? If you don’t mind Raph asking..”

You sighed, shoulders slumping slightly. “It’s for his own good Raph, a case of the right person, wrong time.” Your eyes were set in stone on that one. Raph nodded in understanding. “A-and I didn’t want there to be any misunderstandings so I was pretty honest.. maybe brutally..”

You rubbed the back of your neck. You hadn’t wanted to give him any hope. As mean as that sounded. If he wanted a chance in the future with you, then he needed to seriously focus on himself for now. At least that’s what you had thought. Leo obviously didn’t agree. You smiled at his pranks now. Rolling your eyes at the drama of it all.

“I don’t want there to be any hard feelings Raph, especially between all of you.. Mikey, Donnie, April.. you guys are my friends!”

Raph gave you a soft smile. Nodding. “And you’re ours. He just needs more time. The lies were pretty unbelievable to begin with but ya know, we had to check just in case!” He gave you a teasing wink before standing and going over to the window. He unlocked it and you watched from your seat.

“Tell him, he’s being ridiculous!” You called as Raph gingerly maneuvered out of your window.

“Oh he knows that already.” Raph assured.

You got up, racing to the window to watch Raph take off to the building next door. “Tell him… he’ll be okay.” It was spoken low, but you knew Raph heard it as he jumped from your building to the next.

You closed the window. Locking it.

Wondering how many more ways you would die.

—————————————————————————

。・゜・。{ Leo’s POV }。・゜・。

He heard fractions of words.

His heart was paralyzed.

“…Meant to be…It’s me not you….For your own good…”

Words from your lips.

Hurting him. Stinging his heart and pride.

Whatever. He didn’t care. It’s cool.

How could you leave him??? The two of you were perfect! It was meant to be! You wanted space??? Fine! He’d go on like this never had happened in the first place.

So when his brothers asked where you were? Since ya know the two of you had been attached at the hip for so long! He lied. Lied recklessly. Lied habitually. Lied in detail with intensive background. He didn’t care as long as it meant he didn’t have to say the words “broken up.”

He’d never ever admit to that.

“Huh? Y/n? Oh she took a trip to the Sahara, Desert and dried up! Yeah just poof sand!”

Okay maybe they weren’t the best lies ever created. But it got the job done. It spelled out, “don’t ask.” And yet all his brothers kept doing was just that. Like they were expecting him to finally say something different.

Like he was going to say how disappointed he was. Not even in you. But in himself. For not changing, not seeing the signs, not doing enough before it was too late and now the consequences were at his shell.

Leo sighed, flipping a page of a Jupiter Jim comic without even really reading it. He wasn’t good at goodbyes. You knew that. Surely you knew this was how it would be. What was worse, Leo still wanted you. Wished for you to be back already. Missed you. He still had some of your things too! But until you saw the error you drastically made, or he somehow lost his big old ego! Things were at a standstill and he surely wouldn’t quit lying…

Until he ran out of them. That and ways to say ‘die.’

—————————————————————————

[stuckonmain]

On the Road to Nowhere

2012 Raph x Reader

Mutant Apocalypse timeline

Summary: After the mutagen bomb goes off, you manage to save Raph and Donnie. Sort of. Dealing with new bodies, memory loss, missing brothers and friends...was maybe not how any of you wanted your adult lives to go, but the world has changed beyond repair.

So with a heavy heart, you and your battered dream team set off onto the road to nowhere.

In other words, the early days of the Mutant Apocalypse.

Warnings: Angst, sadness, the characters cry a lot, bittersweet ending, really hefty word count, implied capriltello but it's in the background, Raphael is trans in this because it's my fic and my rules

Word count: 13.6k

***

Day 0.

  Donnie was hooked up to some machine of theirs, trying as hard as he could to save his brain as their body was mangled beyond repair, Casey was texting you nonstop, Mikey and Leo were MIA, Raph was curled up on the couch, and you were sitting on the floor trying to process everything.

CaseyjONES:

R you guys okay??? No ones responding. Me and april are at my house 

CaseyjONES:

(Y/N) seriously what’s going on? I know you can see this i see your read symbol

CaseyjONES:

Where are you guys???

  Oh yeah. Now that you were done attaching Donnie to his one shot at survival, you could stop ignoring Casey’s texts. Nice.

You:

Sorry Case’ I was kinda preoccupied for a bit there

You:

Leo n Mikey are missing. Donnie and I retreated back into the lair. Raph is freaking out, I think he hit his head. Would ask Dee, but Dee is compromised. 

CaseyjONES:

Compromised???

You:

They fell off a building and got impaled. Is currently uploading his consciousness into an old Metalhead prototype. Very horrifying to witness. Status update, I feel like throwing up.

CaseyjONES:

…

CaseyjONES:

Shit

You:

Shit indeed

You: 

Anyways, I’m mostly uninjured. Arm mighta gotten mildly sprained but y’know what i’ll worry bout that later. Lair is a mess, only thing really salvageable was the lab. Probably gonna leave as soon as dee is stable. How are you guys?

CaseyjONES:

My sister got mutated. Last thing she touched was our cat so now she’s got claws. Shes freakin out and aprils trying to calm her down with empath powers or whatever. My dad is MIA but good riddance if ya ask me. Broke mty arm so im typing this with 1 hand, and april sprained her ankel. The cat has miraculously survived + is sittig w/ me on the couch wich is pretty cool ngl

You:

So youre all stable???

CaseyjONES:

Yea

You:

Oh thank god

You: 

Cas my phones about to die. Dee n i will contact ya soon as theyre stable. Love ya. Stay safe or i’ll kill u

CaseyjONES:

Cool cool. Love you too. keep everyone+urself safe. Hopefully we;ll see yo soon.

  You sighed as your phone clicked off, definitively cutting off your final connection to your friends.

  Raph whimpered behind you in one of the most un-Raph like ways you’d ever heard, and you turned around.

  “Raph? You okay?” You rasped.

  He was curled around himself tightly, rocking back and forth.

  “Who the fuck are you?” He whispered, tears in his eyes.

  You winced. You were guessing he had some form of amnesia, or some kind of damage to the hippocampus.

   “I’m (Y/N). (Y/N) (L/N). You’re my best friend, but I think you hit your head in all the chaos.” You said slowly, feeling your heart sink even further.

  He gave a strangled sob and shoved his face into his knee pads. “I hate this. Who the fuck am I?”

  “You’re Raphael Hamato. You’re the son of Splinter or Hamato Yoshi. You’re the brother of Donatello, Leonardo, and Michelangelo, and the father of Chompy Picasso. You’re the best friend ever to me. You hit your head when Leo saved us from the mutagen bomb. I’m pretty sure it is currently the end of the known world.” You answered slowly, robotically. You were half-aware of how you were saying it for your own sanity as much as you were for Raph’s.

  “Where are we?” Raph said, voice trembling in a way that seemed so out of character.

  “Your home. Well. Sorta. It kinda got partially destroyed, there were a lotta cave ins.” You said numbly, standing up. “D’ya wanna tour? See if it…I’unno, sparks a few memories?”

  He pressed his shell to the back of the couch, scooting away from you. “D’you think that’ll help? …How do I know I can trust you?”

  “...C’mere.” You said, waving towards Donnie’s bulletin board in the back of the lab. Hesitantly, Raph followed after you, though not without a groan of pain.

  “That’s you.” You murmured, unpinning a photo of a smiling Raph and Casey as they posed in front of a wall you’d all spray painted. “I took this photo when we were fifteen, about three years ago. That human is Casey Jones, our close friend.”

  Raph took the photo, squeezing it lightly in his shaky hands. “Show me another.” He demanded.

  “Here’s you and I at the farmhouse.” You smiled fondly at the memory. “I was bored and convinced you to let me give you eyeliner.” Photo-Raph was scowling at the camera, with his arms crossed and pointy winged liner around his eyes. Photo-you was grinning proudly, holding the eyeliner pen with one hand and giving photo-Raph a side-hug with the other.

  Real-Raph accepted the photo. “That’s me, then?”

  “Yeah.” 

  “Why don’t I look like you and this guy?”

  “We’re humans. You’re a mutant.” You said simply. “A turtle/human hybrid, like your siblings.” 

  You pointed to a group shot. “The one with the blue mask is Leonardo, orange is Mikey, and purple is…uhm. Well, purple was Donnie...” You said, trying to choke back tears as you stared at the photo. “I-is any of this…y’know, ringing any bells?” You managed to mumble out through your tears. 

  Raph shook his head. “No.”

  “Oh.” You said, feeling a fresh new wave of dread wash over you. You took a deep breath. “Well. That’s not ideal.” 

  “Where are the other…turtles?” Asked Raph, clearly hesitant to call these supposed strangers his siblings, which nearly broke you even further.

  “Mikey and Leo are missing, and Donnie…” You sighed. “Well, I’d probably better just show you.”

  You lead him over to the table where Donnies mutilated body sat underneath a sheet. Wires ran from underneath it and connected to a tiny Metalhead robot.

  “What’s…wrong with him?” Raph said softly, reaching for the sheet.

  “Don’t.” You breathed, brushing his hand away. “You don’t wanna see it, trust me. They fell off a building and got impaled by shrapnel and debris. Their body isn’t exactly pretty or…y’know. Recognizable as Donatello.”

  “They’re dead?” Raph asked, and the tinge of discomfort in his voice wasn’t nearly enough for the situation- the Raph you knew would be yelling and crying and screaming, not…not being mildly uncomfortable in the way that one is when a stranger dies.

  “Yes and no. He’s uploading his brain into that robot. There’s only about an hour left before it loads. After that, we’re outta here for good. The scavengers’ll be coming soon, so we havta get a move on sooner than later.” You said, an empty hollow feeling in your chest as you said the words ‘for good’. 

  It just felt so real.

  “C’mon. Let’s see if your room has anything salvageable.” You grunted, leaving Donnie’s body behind.

  Raph’s room had partially caved in, but the front of it still looked okay. His drum set sat undamaged in the corner, though you doubted there was room for it in the Shellraiser, so it was a moot point.

  Raph stared vacantly at the place that had once mattered so much to him, without a single hint that he recognized any of it in his empty features. You wanted to hug him so bad. Maybe more for your own comfort than for his. 

  But then again, you needed the familiar hug of your best friend…not this vacant eyed empty shell of a turtle who didn’t recognize you.

  “Oh hey look. That box says ‘photos’ on it.” Raph said lightly, pointing at a dusty shoebox that sat under the bed and breaking you out of your spiralling thoughts.

  “It also says ‘do not touch’.” You pointed out.

  “Yeah well, I think I’d want me to know what’s in my own ‘do not touch’ box.” Raph grunted, sounding like his old sarcastic self again for just a moment.

  You held your hands up and stepped aside, and Raph scooped up the box. 

  He took off the lid, and picked up one of the photos. “...Who’s Venus?” He said, holding up a photo of a little turtle in a red bow with the label ‘Venus De Milo’. 

  You frowned, staring at the photo in confusion. Judging by the line drawn over the word ‘Venus’, Raph clearly had not wanted you to know about it, but the name didn’t ring any bells. “Actually, I don’t know. I’ve never met a Venus. Maybe you guys had some long lost sister that no one told me about?”

  “Seriously? What kinda soap opera bullshit would that be?” Raph snorted.

  “I mean. It wouldn’t be the first time.” You shrugged. 

  “...Wait, really?”

  “S’okay, we’ll ask Donnie.” You said. “Now…I’m pretty sure you’d want me to save your sketchbook and paints. Your canvases too, but we don’t have room for that.”

  He swallowed, flipping through the sketchbook you’d handed him, tracing over the doodles on the cover. “Fuck. I…I don’t remember any of these.” He murmured, not even bothering to wipe the tears from under his mask.

  “And I…I can’t find Chompy.” You whispered, rifling around his room a final time. “Shit. Shit shit shit. M-maybe he ran away…” You trailed off, wiping your face with your torn-up shirtsleeve.

  “Chompy?”

  You looked away from him. “Chompy Picasso. Alien turtle. Your son, basically...and I-I can’t fucking find him anywhere. Hopefully he got out before we came here, otherwise…” You swallowed a sob. 

  Raph stared at you, looking sick. “I had a son? But aren’t we…teenagers?” He said, his voice devoid of the raging grief he would have felt before, and replaced with a look of discomfort and horror at being a stranger to his own life.

  “An adoptive son, practically, yeah. And you…you loved him so, so much…He was so fucking cute…” You cried, your voice cracking. “Shit, Raph. You don’t remember Chompy…”

  “Shit.” He agreed, staring at the ground.

***

  Donnie was stable now, opening and closing his new metal hands.

  “How’s Raph?” They said. Their voice had taken on a metallic ring, though it still sounded like Donnie at its core.

  “Brain damage. He’s got brain damage.” You answered, glancing over to the far side of the lab where Raph sat, flipping through his box of photos.

  “What?!”

  “He doesn’t remember anything. That’s why he's keeping his distance. Said it feels weird.” 

  “Memory loss.” Donnie said, and the creaking breathy sounds that followed could only be described as crying although his new metal face remained neutral. 

  You held out your arms and Donnie fell into them, shaking and sobbing but not really. They were so small now, which felt wrong, because Donnie had always been close to your height if not taller.

  Well, it didn’t matter. This was Donnie now, and that stranger in the corner staring at the photos was Raph, and that haggard looking human in the mirror was you.

  Day 0 of the apocalypse and you were already all falling apart at the seams.

  Nice.

***

Day 1.

  Raph forgot his own name for a few hours, and Donnie panicked. He’d say to you later that it was nice to know his circuitry was still capable of having a panic attack, but his voice would be hollow. Well, more so than it was already with that robotic tremor to his voice. 

  But at the moment, you were sitting with your arms around a trembling Metalhead who was actually Donatello, and making uncomfortable eye contact with Raph who sat across from you on the floor of the Shellraiser.

  His bright green eyes were narrowed in frustration, and his plastron rose and fell quicker than usual. He was probably hyperventilating. 

  You kept your distance. When you’d tried to comfort him earlier, he’d tried to shank you with a piece of glass he’d found on the ground. You didn’t hold it against him, really- he’d yelled “Who the hell are you?! Stay back!” first, so you at least knew it wasn’t out of malice.

  And it also meant that he was more damaged than you and Donnie had originally thought. 

  Probably permanently, Donnie had said through gasping breaths before he realized he didn’t actually need air anymore. 

  Fuck. 

  “I’m sorry, Raph.” You found yourself saying, because you were. It may have stung having him try to hurt you, but what stung more was the look of pure fear and confusion in his face. 

  He broke eye contact with you and dropped his face onto his knee pads again, slumping over in shame and sorrow. 

  “I’m sorry (Y/N), Donatello.” He replied, voice slightly muffled by his legs, which were pulled to his chest.

  “Don’t be.” You muttered. “It’s not your fault. You didn’t mean to.”

  Donnie nodded. “It’s not your fault. It’s mine. I should’ve treated you sooner, then you might’ve stood a chance-”

  “Shut up Donatello. If you had done that then you woulda bled out and died and you are not allowed to fucking die on me, we clear?” You hissed, squeezing his metal shoulders.

  “I did die, (Y/N).” Donnie said flatly, pointing at the bag that held their body.

  “Shit.” You said, letting your gaze follow his finger as you let it finally sink in that yeah you were talking to Donnie, but also that was his fucking corpse in the back of the Shellraiser. “Shit shit shit. You’re still with us, but like…man this is fucked up, huh? You’re not dead, Don, you’re still you, but…”

  “What if I’m not?! I’m a robot! Maybe the real Donatello is dead! What if I’m just a really good simulation?! What if I just think I’m panicking because it’s what Donatello would do?” He exclaimed, tugging on Metalhead’s antennae when he would usually tug on his mask tails.

  “Well if it makes you feel any better, I’m pretty sure human emotions are a physical chemical reaction too. So one could argue that I’m just freaking out because the chemicals in my brain are reacting rather than me actually feeling things, right?” You offered.

  “...I guess…Look I think I'm gonna go into sleep mode now, okay? It’s been a long day.” They sighed.

  “Yeah, okay. See ya tomorrow, Don. Love you.” You said, patting his shoulder. 

  “Ditto.” They said, and then the lights went out in their eyes.

  Raph sighed, staring at his sibling. “It feels weird being taller than them for some reason.” He grunted, breaking the silence.

  “Oh, you remember that?” You said hopefully.

  “Nah. I guess it just….feels weird. I dunno.”

  “Well…Yeah it really does. Donnie always towered over you and Leo. Mikey hit a growth spurt like two years ago and wound up almost as tall, and you nearly cried at that...” You rambled, smiling. 

  “Oh. That explains it, I guess.” Raph snorted. “Was I…taller than Leo? Just out of curiosity, of course…” He added, looking hopeful.

  “Nah. Leo’s 5’2ish. You are 5’1.” 

  “...Fuck.” Raph cursed. “That is unfair, y’know that?”

  “You complained about it often.” You smiled. “It was kinda adorable.”

  “Adorable?” Raph said, wrinkling his snout.

  “Yeah. Ha. I uh….called you that a lot, guess it’s kinda a habit. Not because you’re short but because I thought you were cute. Uh…by which I mean good-looking, not cute like a kitten or something.” You said with a shrug. “Not that it really matters.”

  “Oh. That’s cool then, I guess.” Raph said with a slight smile.

  You smiled. “So I can keep callin’ you adorable?”

  “Sure. Knock yourself out.” 

  You glanced out the window of the Shellraiser. It was still too bright out to travel safely to Casey’s apartment, with too many angry mindless mutants destroying everything in sight. You and Donnie had agreed to wait till the cover of night to head over there, in hopes that the new mutants would retain their usual sleep schedule.

  “Damn. How long’ll this take?” You mumbled. It was six in the evening, but still bright as ever outside…

  A pink thing slammed into the front camera, sending you falling back in shock.

  Upon further inspection, it appeared to be a once-human that had been nearly swallowed by brainy, vein-covered tendrils. You choked back a gag.

  Raph swallowed and clicked the camera off, looking greener than usual as the image faded.

  “Ugh. Gross.” You whispered.

  “So I’m assuming that things weren’t alway like this, right?” Raph said softly.

  “Nope. You, my friend, would much prefer the Old World…” You paused, having a realization. “Shit. I bet that if this were a transcript, ‘Old World’ would be fucking capitalized.” 

  “So….there’s no way to undo whatever happened?”

  “Nah. Dee’s run the numbers. The odds of the Earth bouncing back from this…are in the negatives.” You said, unable to summon anything other than an empty sigh.

  “...What was your Earth like?” Raph asked, raising his brow ridge as he stared at you gently, as if you were some sorta fragile ceramic that could break at any minute.

  Or as if you were a tearful human who’s world had just turned upside down.

  You heaved a sigh, and sat down next to him on the floor.

  “Well…there were trees yesterday. Green trees, not those crystal lookin’ things in Central Park that we saw this morning. And yesterday, this was New York, and it was full of people, not…those brain mutants and animal hybrids and…fuckin’  masses of organs suspended in jello. I dunno how far reaching the mutation bomb was, but Dee’s scanners have picked up on stuff as far as Florida to the south and Quebec to the north, and that’s not even counting the ones that went off on the West Coast and outside of America. Whatever it was that terraformed the Earth did a fucking good job.” You sighed, pulling your knees to your chest.

  “So the old world really is the Old World.” Raph breathed. 

  “Yup. I…I don’t think we’ll ever get our homes back, Raphael.” You whispered. 

  Yesterday morning when you’d said something like that, Raph had pulled you into a wordless hug and you’d pressed your face into his chest and cried. 

  This evening as you sat on the floor crying, Raph stared at you sadly but kept his distance.

  And you were reminded once again that you really were alone.

***

You: Casey we’re headed over

You: Read ya messages case

You: Dude seriously, are you guys okay?

Sent: 4hrs ago, unread

You: We’re here…

Sent: 1hr ago, unread

***

  “Case’? Casey?” You yelled, wandering through his apartment. “April…”

  “April! Casey!” Donnie yelled even louder than you. His face couldn’t emote, but his voice was high and desperate, and you were pretty sure they were twice as nervous as you were.

  “He hasn’t replied to any messages since like three pm, and we’ve searched this dump for like an hour. I don’t think your friends are here, guys.” Raph sighed, crossing his arms. 

  “Shut up!” You and Donnie chorused, and Raph rolled his eyes. 

  “Fine, whatever! We’ll just stay here forever then I guess!” He snapped.

  “Yeah well maybe we’re not being big babies, Raph! Don’t you care about finding Casey?!”

  “I don’t know who the fuck Casey is!” Raph growled.

  Donnie deflated. “...You’re right. I…I’m sorry, Raph. I forgot that you’re…y’know.”

  “Brain damaged? Nice. Can’t fucking relate.” Raph grunted.

  You exhaled through your nose. “Sorry Rafa. We’re just…we really wanted this lead…” Shit you were crying again. 

  “It’s just…I miss them so much. Casey and April mattered a lot to us, and to you, and we thought they’d….we thought they’d be here, but we’ve lost their signal and now I don’t fucking know what to do…” You whimpered, burying your face into your scarf.

  Donnie tried to pat you on the shoulder but only succeeded in reaching to the small of your back.

  “I miss  them too. Well Raph…Casey and April…well, they mattered a ton to me and it just…is so scary to consider that they might…” 

  They didn’t finish the sentence, but you knew what they meant. 

  That they might be dead. 

  Raph stared at both of you with a grimace, seeming to pick up on the meaning too.

***

Day 15.

  Raph stared at the photos a lot, not recognizing any of them.

  Sometimes he woke up on the floor of the subway car that you, his supposed ‘best friend’, and Donnie, the robot who claimed to be his brother, had dubbed the ‘Shellraiser’. He’d sit there trying to remember where he was, only for him to slowly remember waking up in rubble to a wide pair of (E/C) eyes.

  That was always what he remembered first. 

  Then he’d remember the smell of smoke and something he didn’t have a name for, and the feeling of someone hugging him close to their chest and whispering “It’s okay it’s okay-shit- Dee, he’s not waking up, he’s not- Oh my god Donnie, your- your plastron-”

  He’d opened his eyes a crack to see humans mutating, screaming in horror, before someone shifted his head, and then all he could see was fabric.

  Then he was on an unfamiliar couch with someone squeezing his hand. “Donnie…that’s a thing that’s possible?”

  “No, but do I have any other option?!”

  “...Shit Dee, you- you can’t die on me-”

  “I won’t. I swear I won’t, (Y/N). If my theories are concrete, which they have an-” The voice paused to take a laboured breath. “-an 86.3% chance of being, then my consciousness will- shit that hurts- my consciousness will be uploaded into Metalhead…”

  Raph didn’t remember how that conversation had ended, which he was very okay with. 

  Then after that the other things would begin to come back. Right. Right, he was Raphael, and these two people used to matter a lot to him in the Before Times, supposedly.

  He didn't remember either of you, if he was honest. But if the notes on his Past Self’s photos were trustworthy, then you especially meant the world to him once. 

  He held up a photo of you in different, cleaner clothes. Your eyes were brighter, and you were grinning harder than you ever had now. The note on the back read ‘Reference photo 4 drawing (Y/N)’ in a messy script with a heart drawn next to it. Below it, in smudged print, it said ‘I feel creepy for staring at this for so long… Shit why did I write that down?’

  He frowned and looked at another. This one was of a purple-ish pink turtle that gave the camera a wide smile, and the notation on the back said ‘Chompy I love you so fucking much but stop burning my paper please’

  The next photo wasn’t a photo but a drawing. It was a rough sketch of a human hugging a baby turtle that was drawn in pink, with soft shading and a lot of smudges. The back of this one said ‘Shitty drawing of (Y/N) and Chompy. Felt bad throwing it away though for some reason, idk’

  Raph wrinkled his snout. He disagreed with his Past Self, he thought the drawing looked kinda cute. Still, he’d respect Past Raph’s wishes and hide it away in the ‘Don’t Touch Box’. 

  He looked at the next picture. Venus again. 

  There were a lot of photos in the Don’t Touch Box of this ‘Venus De Milo’, and Raph hadn’t gotten any closer to an answer as to who she was. Heck, there were a few photos where she was completely crossed out with no further commentary. Not that it made much of a difference though, since the commentary that was there was ridiculously unhelpful. ‘Took another one of Sensei’s Venus photos. I wish he’d just let me burn all of them, but instead he just gave me this box and told me to hide them here instead of destroying all our childhood photos. Ugh. I hate them so much, obviously you know why, future me.’

  No, I do not. Why are you so cryptic, Past Me?! Raph clicked in frustration, throwing the Venus photos back into the box. 

  “Lookin’ at Sensei’s old photos, Raph?” Said Donnie, making Raph jump back in surprise. 

  “Dammit, you’re awake?!”

  “Yeah, just finished…charging.” Donnie sighed. “That still feels so weird to say.”

  “Well, you’ve only been like this for…what, a week? Two?” Raph said dryly. 

  “...Yeah. I miss being…tall.” Donnie said softly. Raph got the vibe that they’d actually meant something else, but he didn’t feel like unpacking that right now.

  “I miss you being tall.” Raph agreed. “Maybe that’s a good sign as far as memory stuff goes though.”

  “...Hey, maybe it is, Raph! That’s actually really good!” Donnie said, their voice perking up while their face remained uncannily blank.

  “...Cool.” Raph said. “...Hey, Donnie, who was Venus?”

  Donnie jolted. “-Oh. Right. You found those pictures… I actually forgot about- well. Venus… You’re a transman, Raph, and Venus was your name back before you realized you were a boy.”

  Raph frowned. “I’m a…what?”

  “Well…when we were kids, Splinter named you Venus De Milo because you were physically a girl. Then when we were like thirteen or fourteen you told us that you actually were our brother, not our sister, so Sensei changed your name to Raphael.” Donnie said slowly.

  Raph…did not like that information at all. “So…I’m not a boy?”

  “No you are, it just took a bit of time for you to realize it.” Donnie shrugged. 

  “Good. I…do not like the name Venus.” Raph grunted.

  “Yeah, when we were little you used to make us call you ‘Milo’ instead.” Donnie chuckled. “Splinter was so confused, but he just wanted you to be happy at the end of the day, really…”

  Raph swallowed. “Uhh…Donatello, who’s…Splinter?”

  Donnie’s neck sparked. “Right. Right right right…Raph, Splinter was our dad.” 

  “Oh.” He should know that. What kinda person didn’t even recognize their own father?! 

  Why couldn’t he remember the things that made Past Raph so happy?

  Well he didn’t even remember that he was a fucking girl, so clearly he wasn’t the best judge-

  “G’mornin’ guys” You yawned, leaning over the passenger’s seat where Raph had perched.

  Raph shook his head clear and looked back at you. “Hi.”

  “How’s the new body coming, Don?” You asked, stretching your arms.

  “I’m almost done with the shell. I’ve made it segmented this time so that I can actually bend over, see?” They said, bending the large shell made of sewer plates.

  “Oh. That’s really rad, Dee.” You said proudly.

  “Yeah, I’m sick of being shorter than Raph.” He chuckled. “I can't wait to finish this model.”

  “Wait, you’re making a new new body?” Raph frowned. “Did I know about that?”

  “Yeah, I told you yesterday, you must have forgotten... S’okay though. Here’s the design, I made these blueprints months ago.”

  “How come? What’s wrong with this robot?” Raph said, glancing over the taller, sleeker design sketch Donnie had handed him.

  Donnie shrugged. “I guess…this is Metalhead’s body, not mine. And I want my body to feel like mine.”   “Oh. Okay, fair enough I guess?” Raph shrugged, not sure how that made sense. Donnie was in the body, so that made it his right? Why’d they need a new one?

  Whatever, Donnie could do what they wanted, he supposed.

  “I think it looks great.” You smiled, though it didn’t reach your eyes the way it did in the Don’t Touch Box photos. “I love the purple LEDs.”

  “Yeah, it looks nice.” Raph agreed. It really did; it was cleaner than Donnie’s current body, and seemingly more combat-effective if all the hidden blasters in the concept art were any clue. Plus it just looked cool as fuck.

  “Thanks. It should be finished in a few weeks…in the meantime though, (Y/N), we should discuss plans.”

  You nodded, following Donnie to the back of the Shellraiser.

  “We should go on a supply run, we’re low on perishable food and water.” You said, writing ‘supply run’ on the whiteboard Donnie had set up in the back. 

  “Okay, noted. Do we have enough non-perishables?”

  “Yeah. The drawers in the back are full of instant ramen and canned food.” You nodded.

  “So just the usual things then…shelter. What’re we gonna do about shelter?”

  “Yeah, I don’t really like it out here. Seems pretty sketchy.” Raph grunted, spinning around so that his plastron was pressed to the back of the chair and his head was rested on the top.

  “I vote we go to the farmhouse. You’ve run your scans, and I think we just needa….you know, accept that everyone is…out of range of the scanners. We’re just sitting ducks in New York, Don.” You sighed.

  Donnie clenched their fists. “I- I know, but like…what if they come back for us and we’re not here, (Y/N)? What if by leaving we forfeit our chances of finding Casey, April, Mikey, and Leo?”

  “Well what if we do? Who cares?” Raph argued. “They either left or they’re dead, Donatello! We should leave too if we wanna not be dead!”

  “Yeah well what do you know?! You don’t even know the extent of the damage!”

  “Yeah I do. Explode-y bomb things from here to the other side of the planet. Earth getting terraformed in some twisted reflection of the world you knew before. Humans turning into horrifying brainless monsters, and humans that turn into horrified monstrous mutants, and humans like (Y/N) who survived with trauma and dead friends. And friends that lose their memories. Yadayada, all that shit.” Raph said through gritted teeth. “Plus, I saw you guys fighting off those mutants in the last supply run, you barely escaped with your fucking tail attached. Long story short, I vote we get outta here as soon as possible.”

  You and Donnie looked at each other, blinking.

  “I vote what he votes.” You supplied.

  Donnie sighed. “You always did…fine. Fine, guys.  You win. But can we please just stay for one more night?”

  You shrugged. “Yeah, I think that seems fair. Raph?”

  He nodded. “Yeah. Deal. We havta go on that supply run, anyways, so.”

  “Cool cool. So…farmhouse then, Dee?” You said hesitantly, as if you were afraid of hurting Donnie.

  Donnie just grunted. “I’m gonna go into sleep mode. You guys handle the supply run, I have to do some repairs from last time.”

  “Well that wasn’t really an answer.” You said flatly as Donnie’s lights went out again.

  “...No it was not.” Raph sighed. 

***

  “D’ya think I can pull off steel-toed boots?” You grinned, rapping your knuckles on the metal capped toes of a pair of leather combat boots.

  “Well…it seems efficient, so yeah, why not.” Raph shrugged.

  “Yeah, but would it look rad?” You pressed.

  Raph nodded. “It would look badass.”

  “Now that’s the answer I was lookin’ for.” You beamed, pulling on the boots.

  “Do you think I’d look cool in that jacket?” Raph asked, reaching for an aviator jacket. It was useful, from a practical standpoint, with tons of pockets and the ability to hold in warmth, but he didn’t really want it if it didn’t make him look like the characters on the covers of the comics he’d managed to salvage.

  “Raphael, you would look so cool in that jacket. You need it.” You nodded emphatically. “All we’d needa do is cut a hole for your shell.”

  “...Oh yeah. Forgot about that part.” Raph sighed, wrinkling his snout in disdain. His shell was kinda inconvenient. But then again, it did function as a fantastic natural armor, so pros and cons. He tossed the jacket into the hijacked cart anyways.

  You grabbed a tent from the shelf. “I think this’ll probably be useful down the line right?”

  “Well…it’s free, so might as well.”

  “Ooh, lookit this lifestraw!”

  “What the hell is a lifestraw?”

  “It filters water. Turns even the most contaminated junk into safely drinkable water. I’m surprised there’s even one left, this is gonna save our shells.”

  “You don’t have a shell, (Y/N).”

  “I’ve spent the past three years of my life surrounded almost entirely by people who do. Your jargon has worn off on me.”

  “What the hell is jargon?”

  “Your turtle-specific manner of speaking. Like swapping normal words for ‘shell’.”

  “Shit, we did that?”

  “Yeah. It was charming.”

***

  “(Y/N), what’s ‘feminine hygiene’?” Raph frowned, peering down an aisle.

  You glanced up, following his gaze. “Uh…y’know, girl stuff, don’t worry about it.”

  “Donnie said I’m a ‘transman’, so maybe I should.” Raph mumbled, feeling ill at the thought.

  You did a double take. “Wait what? Oh-kay, cool cool. Maybe you do need to worry about it.”

  Raph grunted and crossed his arms. “I dunno why, but I get a very odd, very uncomfortable feeling when you say that.”

  You swallowed, obvious nervousness in your eyes. “Well…that is fair. Raphael…allow me to remind you about the world of…feminine hygiene. Damn. I’m having to give my boyfriend- uh- my best friend- ‘the talk’, this feels weird!” You laughed. “Uh…so how do I put this. Once a month people with feminine body parts…bleed uncontrollably and you havta fix it with the stuff in this aisle! …Yayyyy!”

  Raph suddenly got a very vivid memory of sitting on the couch of the lair with a hot pack on his plastron and an angry feeling in his head.

  Shit, why was one of the few memories he had of the Old World one where he was bleeding in places he didn’t want to be?!

  He groaned and facepalmed. “This is shit, you know that? My life is shit.”

  “Periods ain’t fun.” You nodded. “I dunno if you turtles are affected the same way as humans though, so I could be totally wrong-”

  “No, no, I remember now. It’s the same. Basically.” Raph said, blushing bright red and glaring at the ground. “Aaand I’m calling it on that conversation.” He finished.

  You nodded. “I’ll allow it. Lemme know if you need any help figuring out what supplies you need-”

  “-nO I’m good!” Raph exclaimed. “How about you just get- get some other supplies right now?!” He grinned, trying to mask the discomfort that rose the longer he stood in this stupid aisle.

  You nodded. “Whatever makes you feel comfortable. I’ll be in the next aisle over, the first aid section, ‘kay?”

  “Great.” Raph replied.

  It was only after you’d left that he noticed that you’d called him your ‘boyfriend’ for a second there.

  Well. Well that was an interesting development. 

  Raph hated not having his memories. He was 99% positive that Past Raph would know exactly what you meant by that, but presently? Raph was just so, so confused.

  Maybe he had been your boyfriend in the Old World. If the photos counted for anything, Past Raph had probably liked you at some point- you showed up more often than anyone else, both in the photos and in his sketchbook. And he hadn’t even finished digging through them yet.

  And now instead of having good ol’ Past Raph to comfort you, you got this Raph. The Raph who had forgotten his own name a few days ago, the Raph who didn’t really know what to do when you cried, the Raph who was so sick of not knowing… 

  Heck, he was pretty sure you had been avoiding touching him, which felt just as weird as being taller than Donnie. Even in the photos, you always seemed to have an arm around him or a hand in his, but now you were careful not to stray within a few feet of him. As if he was some kinda ticking time bomb.

  Then again, he kinda was, huh? The last time you’d come near him, he’d tried to stab you in a panic. Maybe you were right to steer clear of him, though the thought of that just made him sad for some reason. 

  He paused and blinked at a mirror that sat at the end of the aisle.

  Huh. That really was what he looked like, all green skin and torn mask tails and neon eyes. 

  He looked tired.

  “Hey Rafa, lookit what I found!” You yelled, and Raph tore himself away from his reflection, dropping his armful of…feminine hygiene products into the cart before following your voice to the paint section.

  “Look dude! Spray paint!” You grinned, bouncing on your feet.

  Raph stared at you blankly, trying to understand your excitement. “Uh…did we…uhm…”

  An image flashed through his head of holding a can of spray paint and stepping back to look at a mural. 

  “...OH! Oh right! I used to like spray painting!” He exclaimed, pleased at the memory. “(Y/N) I remember it!”

  Your eyes widened. “You remember?! Oh Raph this is huge!”

  “...What d’ya say to painting a final mural before we leave the city, for….I dunno, old time’s sake?” Raph said with a hesitant smile.

  “Hell yeah!” You beamed, grabbing as many colors of spray paint as you could and dropping them into the cart. “Dee is in sleep mode so he can’t even stop us!”

  “Yes, I can.” 

  You fell back and dropped your phone. Raph’s fists flew into a fighting stance, observing the phone nervously.

  “Sorry ‘bout the scare guys.” Donnie’s voice chuckled, not sounding even slightly sorry. “I just discovered that I can access you through your phones! I’ll be back in sleep mode soon, I just thought that was a perfect time to test the audio feature.”

  “Wait, you can hear our conversations?” You frowned.

  “Uh….surprise?” Donnie said sheepishly. “If it makes you feel any better, I don’t plan on stopping you from spray painting. It actually seems like it could both help Raph’s memory since it’s so familiar, as well as being just…a nice gesture. My one suggestion is that you add some way for Leo, Mikey, Casey, and April to find us, like a coded key to our whereabouts.”

  “Oh. That’s smart.” You said. “But can we get back to how you’ve been eavesdropping this whole time Donald?!”

  “Lalala, going into sleep mode, can’t hear you, lalala…” Donnie said, ever the terrible liar, and disconnected a second later.

  “That little shit.” You said fondly. “If you’re still listening, I love you, Don, but you’re a total jerk.”

  Raph shook his head, feeling the beginnings of a smile on his face. “If you’re still listening, then quit listening, Donatello.”

  But no reply came from the phone, so you shrugged. “Guess he actually is back in sleep mode. C’mon, let’s paint a mural.”

***

  Raph glared at the wall.

  The spray paint had gathered into a messy blob of color that did not look like a mural.

  The paint bottle felt natural in his hand, yeah, and his lines were steady, but they weren’t coming out right. He scowled and tried to cover the blob with a cloud of red, but then it didn’t look like a cloud, it just looked like blood.

  “AUGUHH!” He yelled in frustration, kicking the wall. He jumped back to hold his foot, which was now throbbing in pain. Shit, why was that his instinct?!

  “You good Raph?” You said, looking over from your side of the wall. Your mural looked nice, with a painting of two turtles, a skeleton, and a red haired girl with eyes that seemed to glow. They were all outlined in thick black and colored in vibrant shades, which made them pop against the gray wall.

  “Fine…” He grumbled, rubbing his foot. “I just- I can’t draw or something.”

  You followed his glare toward his bloody smear of a painting.

  “Oh…did you…”

  “Forget? Yeah. I fucking forgot how to draw.” He said with a humorless laugh.

  “Do you…want a crash course? We’ve still got an hour or so before we have to head out…” You offered.

  He shook his head. “No…we don’t have time. …Did you add the message?”

  You nodded, still staring at him sympathetically. “I wrote ‘guys, find us in the healing place- Red, Purple, and (L/N)’. They’ll know what I mean.”

  “The ‘healing place’?” Raph repeated.

  “The farmhouse.” You elaborated. “We went there back when the kraang invaded three years ago. Leo was in a coma for like three months, and y’know…healed. And I think we all kinda healed too. You were kinda the team leader for a bit there…” You trailed off, eyes glazing over as if you were reminiscing about something Raph undoubtedly wouldn’t understand. You shook your head clear. “...but you know, I think they’ll get it. More importantly, I don’t think anyone else will, so we can’t be followed. Not that we have any reason to be followed, I’m just paranoid.” 

  “Aren’t we like…ninjas with like a million enemies or whatever?”

  You snorted. “Kinda, yeah.”

  “...So the idea that we might be followed doesn’t seem that outlandish, right?” Raph ventured.

  “Hm. Thanks for justifying my paranoia, Raphael!” You exclaimed, not looking any happier.

  “...Uh…I’m gonna say you’re welcome, but I get the funny feeling that you don’t actually mean that, huh?” He said sheepishly,

  “No, I…I dunno.” You said with a humorless laugh. “I’m being weird.”

  “It’s literally the end of your world. You should be acting weird, right?” Raph snorted.

  You smiled half-heartedly. “Ya think?”

  “Donnie’s acting weird, I’m acting weird. You can act weird too.” He said matter-of-factly.

  You sighed. “But that’s just the thing. Donnie lost their body. You lost your past. What the hell did I lose? …You know, aside from my friends…and family…and my old life…but you guys lost that too!”

  “I really didn’t. You can’t miss what you don't remember, right?” Raph said with a hollow laugh. “I have no Old World. No old connections. The world we’re in now is basically all I’ve ever known, so if anything, I’ve lost…the least.”

  You stared at him, a discomforting sense of horror in your eyes. You raised your hands as if to set them on his shoulders, but then lowered them instead. 

  “Raph…Fuck. No! You’ve lost everything! Like, way more than I have! At least I still have good memories to go back to, o-of you, of Chompy, of Leo and Casey and Mikey and April…of Mona, Raph, I still have memories of Mona, and you don’t even have that…” You wiped your eyes with your scarf and shook your head. “Shit, man. We’re all going through hell, I shouldn’t bother comparing it.”

  “Yeah….yeah. That’s a good way of lookin’ at it.” Raph sighed.

  “...Who's Mona?” He asked lightly, after a beat of silence.

  You smiled slightly. “Mona Lisa? She’s this really awesome Salamandrian who we met in space.”

  “We went to space?!” Raph said, eyes widening.

  “Yup. It was very convoluted… Anyways, we both had this ridiculous crush on her…she was so cool. She could beat us at fighting easily, but she also was so sweet…ahhh, what a woman.” You said, perking up a bit more. “Anyways, at least she’s safe…She’s in space.”   

  “What else have you guys not told me about my life?!” Raph exclaimed.

  “I promise I’ll tell you everything once life has calmed down a bit, but there is some stuff that I genuinely believe is too much for you right now.” You shrugged.

  “Well it’s my memories, so I don’t think that’s for you to decide.” Raph frowned.

  You opened your mouth, glaring at him, before deflating. “...I…you’re right. It is your memories, Raph. You do deserve the truth. But the truth isn’t always easy or fun or any of that so can we make a compromise?”

  He gestured for you to go ahead.

  You squeezed your hands. “I’ll tell you what you need to know, and if you figure stuff out on your own- which is highly likely- I’ll give ya more details. Deal?” You held out your hand.

  Raph sighed. This was probably the best he was gonna get from you.

  …Also…what was with the hand? 

  Raph frowned, staring at your hand, and took it awkwardly. “Deal?”

  You blinked.

  He blinked.

  “Raph why are you still holding my hand?” You coughed.

  “Oh, was I supposed to-”

  “-Let go, yeah, this is a handshake.”

  “-Weird. You guys are weird.”

  “You still haven’t let go?” You said, but you were smiling.

  Would it be weird if he said he kinda didn’t wanna? Holding your hand felt nice…

  “Uh- right.” He grunted, wrenching his hand out of yours.

***

Day 16.

  “Well, I think we’re all set to go upstate.” Donnie said as he finished checking over the items Raph and you had taken.

  “Cool.” You said softly.

  You’d talked about going upstate for the past two weeks, but as Donnie closed the power-cell powered freezer box, it finally hit you that you were leaving. 

  Like leaving leaving. 

  It wasn’t like there was much of a choice. New York was dangerous, more now than before. You and Raph had even wound up in a mild tussle as you made your way back to the Shellraiser last night.

  There were too many scared humans and animals that had gained sentience and horrifying mindless creatures that looked like body-horror inspired abominations to go anywhere without a fight. And frankly, none of you wanted to deal with that.

  And it didn’t help that Donnie’s sensors weren’t picking up on any habitable land in the general radius. You were sure he wasn’t telling you everything, but he had mumbled something about the soil being full of toxic chemicals and unable to maintain life among…other things.

  Essentially, New York City was dying. But maybe if you were all lucky, the farmhouse would be habitable.

  By which you meant…with good soil. It’d be really really nice if you guys could just…plant seeds for food and hang out there for the rest of eternity. Nice, but unlikely, if you were realistic. Still. It was a spot of hope. 

  Raphael stared at you mournfully as you and Donnie finished preparing the Shellraiser. He did that a lot now, and it always stung about the same- he wanted to remember you, but to him, you were a stranger. 

  You hated feeling like a stranger around the person who’d been closer to you than anyone ever back in the Before Times. 

  Not that you’d told him much. You thought there was kinda a power imbalance now, since you knew so much about Raph and he now knew so little about you. He was vulnerable, and you, being one of the ones who had saved him, had a bit more sway over him than you felt comfortable with. 

  He was catching onto you though, you could see that. He’d understandably demanded answers last night, and although you’d agreed to his terms, you were dreading it. Because how could you tell him that he had been your boyfriend if he didn’t even know who you were? Worse, would he feel like he had to immediately go back to that just to make you feel better?

  You’d described your relationship to him as ‘best friend’, which was more accurate, honestly, considering both you and Raph had been a bit odd around romance, but still. It would probably be more to take in than he could handle right now…

  “So. We ready to get this tin can on the road?” You said finally, leaning over Donnie’s shoulder as they stepped away from the newly pumped tires. 

  “...I believe so.” Donnie said proudly, patting the side of the car. 

  And with that, you gave New York City one final good-bye.

  “Seeya, New York…you were one hell of a town to live in. We….had a lotta fun here.” You said, leaning against the Shellraiser to stare at the cityscape.

  “Goodbye pigeons and manholes and starless skies. I-I’ll miss you.” Donnie said fondly, leaning next to you.

  “And I’ll miss pizza gyoza, my fire escape- heck, I’ll even miss Shredder’s lair and TCRI.” You grinned.

  “What a town.” Donnie said, nodding.

  "Hey guys, this is real sweet, but it’s getting dark.” Raph grunted, poking his head out the door. “Let’s get this freakshow on the road.”

  “...Okay.” You said with a rueful smile.

  “...Yeah, we’re coming.” Donnie sighed, and the two of you headed into the Shellraiser.

***

  By the time the sun had set, you had left the city.

  Raph sat in the passenger seat, eating dry pasta like a heathen, and Donnie sat in the roof hatch running his scanners. You weren’t exactly expecting that he’d find anything positive though.

  As you silently drove up the road, you took note of a few things- first off, there were trees out here, at least. Dead trees, but still trees rather than alien shapes that had loomed over you in New York, which was some relief.  

  Secondly…there was no sign of life. The only noise you had heard since leaving New York was the quiet hum of the Shellraiser’s engine, punctuated by Raphael’s crunching on his fucking dry pasta. (Seriously, that stuff could not be good for his digestive system…)

  Thirdly…your hopes of finding an oasis in all of this were running as dry as the land around you. 

  New York was dead, and Earth wasn’t following too far behind it. 

  Donnie clambored back down from the top lookout with a heavy sigh. 

  “So Doc, what’s the diagnosis?” You said dryly, no bothering to turn around. “Lemme guess- we’re doomed?”

  “Well, my sensors have picked up nothing but toxic chemicals and mutagen. There's no living organic plant forms for miles. I’m not picking up on the signatures of Casey, April, Leo, Mikey, Karai, the Mutanimals, or the (L/N)s. I don’t think the Earth will ever heal from this, and our tech has been basically thrown back to the dark ages.” He paused to heave an even more dramatic sigh, before saying “So does that answer your question?” cheerfully.

  You whistled. “Ouch. So we are doomed.”

  Raph crunched on his pasta and glanced up. “Great. That’s….real great.”

  “Raph, are you eating straight up uncooked tortellini?!” Donnie said, gagging.

  Raph smirked and crunched louder, and you cringed at the sound. 

  “Ugh, must you do that?”

  “It tastes good.” He said innocently.

  “Well don’t come to me for help when you get a stomachache.” Donnie said, disgusted.

  You snorted, and refocused on the road as Donnie continued to complain about Raph’s apoca-licious eating habits.

  Because hey. Maybe you were just headed towards certain doom upstate. Maybe Raph would never remember the past. Maybe the fucking planet was mutated beyond recognition…But hey.

  At least you were with your best friends. 

  Heck, if you ignored the metallic tremor in Donnie’s voice and made Raph’s ever so slightly gentler, you could pretend that this was just another peaceful road trip. Just another night of smiling at Dee and Rafa’s antics, of choosing to unsubtly egg them on, of talking till morning with Raph about shit like life and the future and insecurities, comforting each other in that sweet way the two of you always had.

  Yeah, yeah. You’d pretend it was a night like that.

  And for a bit, you’re nearly convinced that when you woke up tomorrow, everything would be alright.

***

Day 17.

  Everything was not entirely alright.

  The farmhouse was devoid of people, and was shrouded in suspiciously pink clouds that hung lower than clouds usually did. Donnie scanned the air though and only got the usual amount of toxic chemicals, so you guys reluctantly decided it was safe.

  “Woah, looks like this place already got picked clean.” You winced, glancing around the main room. It was mostly empty- everything from the furniture to the photos on the wall had been taken.

   The stairs however, had caved in, but with the help of your grappling hook, you made your way to the top without too much effort.

  The top of the house, by comparison, was full of the homey clutter that you had grown to expect from the healing place. Just being there, surrounded by everyone’s old things and the memories around them, made you breathe a sigh of relief. 

  “Anything up there?” Donnie said from the ground level.

  You smiled, breathing in the air of the place you’d briefly called home. “Everything, Don. Case’s spare eyeliner pens, Leo’s matcha powder, Raph’s forgotten sketchbooks and acrylics…everything.”

  With a bit of effort due to Metalhead’s heavy clunky body, Donnie managed to heave themself upstairs too.

  “Woah. Weird being back here.” He said, and you got the impression that he’d be smiling if they could.

  “How’re ya doin’ down there, Raph?” You said, leaning over the stair rail to see him staring into the living room.

  “I…we watched a dumb cartoon there, right? Uh…Chris Bradford the…Barbarian?” He breathed, as if speaking any louder would shatter his ability to remember.

  You and Donnie glanced at each other, swapping a pair of grins. Well, metaphorically, in Dee’s case.

  “Yeah. Crognard the Barbarian…” You smiled. “But we did watch another show about Chris Bradford!”

  “Awesome, Raph!” Donnie said, pumping their fist.

  “...Cool.” He said softly, putting his hands into the pockets of his jacket. “So…this is the safehouse, then?”

  “Well, ‘safe’ is a strong word…there’s a heck of a lot of danger we got into here last time.” You said, sliding down the stair banister. 

  “Out here in the middle of nowhere?” Raph snorted, turning towards you. “How the hell was this dangerous?”

  “You got mutated into a plant once,” Donnie supplied.

  “Ooh, Bigfoot tried to marry Don,” You grinned.

  “Who’s bigfoot?”

  “This forest cryptid who had a crush on Donnie.” You said with a chuckle.

  “(Y/N), please know that I would be rolling my eyes at you right now if I still had them.” Donnie sighed.

  “I wouldn’t expect anything less.” You said, giving them a mock-salute.

  Raph entered the dining room. “Did anything terrifying happen here?” He said curiously.

  “Hm…Oh yeah. We fought off mutant frogs.” You said, nodding at the memory. “They were all named after conquerors and they hated humans. …One of them talked like Napoleon Dynamite….not that you’d know that reference…”

  “Ha, what?” Raph chuckled. “Our lives sound weird. What other things did we do?”

  “Oh they very much were.” You nodded. “Let’s see…what other shit did we do? Uhm…there was this one time when you got your brain swapped with a kraang, that one was weird.”

  “What exactly is a kraang? You’ve mentioned them before, but…”

  “Oh, right. A kraang looks like- well, here.” You pulled up a photo of a snarling kraang that you’d taken a selfie with. “Voila.”

  “Eww.” Raph cringed. “Why is it like…all goopy and gross?”

  “Evolution, I guess.” You said, wrinkling your nose. “Gnarly, right?”

  “So you’re tellin’ me I got my brain swapped with that thing?!” Raph said incredulously. 

  “Yup. It was pretty freaky seeing your body completely…not-like-you, but hey, we figured it out.” You chuckled.

  “Hey Raph, you might wanna see this!” Donnie said, yelling over the stair rail.

  “Uh, okay…” Raph frowned, heading towards the rope you’d hung over the caved-in stairwell. You followed after him.

  “See, lookit this-” 

  “Hey, this- this is my room!” Raph exclaimed, shoving past Donnie and into the room. “I- I remember this place! I remember sitting there,” He said, pointing at the bed, “And coming this way-” He spun out of the room and down the hall to the bathroom- “And-....oh.” He frowned, opening the bathroom door. “I…I get the weird feeling that somethin’....happened here, huh?” He said softly.

  You winced, reaching to put a hand on his shoulder, before thinking better of it. “Yeah. This is where Leo…was in his coma.”

  “...You sat with him every day, Raph, ‘till he healed.” Donnie said gently.

  Raph nodded. “Ha. I…ah…don’t remember that.”

  “Well, you did remember your room, and a piece of your old daily routine, so I’d say this is a win! Robo-high-three!” Donnie said cheerfully, holding up their hand.

  Raph wrinkled his snout “Uh…okay…” He held up his own hand, mirroring theirs,  staring at them with an awkward shrug. “Hello, three? Uh…satisfied?”

  Donnie lowered his hand. “...I shoulda seen that one coming.”

  Raph rolled his eyes, shoving his hand back into his pocket. “Whatever, Don. What was it you called me up here for, anyways?”

  “Your old sketchbook! I know you have the one from the lair, but this one  is full of all the stuff you did here!” Donnie said excitedly, handing Raph the book.

  Raph shrugged and accepted it, flipping through the pages. “Woah. These are pretty nice.” He said, starting to smile a bit.

  “Ooh, can I see?” You asked hopefully.

  “Sure.” Raph nodded, angling the book so you could see the art too.

  This page was full of the planning-stage-sketches for what you recognized to be the painting he’d done on the party van.

  “Oh dude, these rock.” You grinned.

  “Yeah…I just hope I’ll be able to…y’know.” He clenched his hand, giving it a sad stare. “Do them again someday.”

***

Day 20.

  “Well ladies and gentlefolk, turtles and others, I have gathered you all here today to present…The Donbot V.1!” Said Donnie, staring into the mirror. 

    It was a pretty nice design, if they did say so themself. It was taller than Metalhead’s model had been, standing at his usual height of 5 '6-to-5' 8-ish, and was made of a dark green steel he had salvaged back in the city. In a burst of inspiration, they had added purple accent lights.

  For the first time in days, they didn’t feel so wrong about looking into the mirror. The face that stared back at him wasn’t his, really, but it was…closer. The blank face felt somehow more comfortable than Metalhead’s imitation-turtle one.

They shook their head, chuckling to themself slightly. If only he were presenting his invention to a crowd of scientifically minded peers instead of to his friend and his brother. Then he might prepare something flashy and exciting, presentation-wise. 

  But alas, it was the end of the world.

  So instead, he simply glanced at themself one more time before leaving the bathroom, revealing his new body without any fanfare.

  You patted his shell and said they looked ‘rad as hell’. Raph shot him a wary look, but it went away fast, and soon enough Raph was congratulating him too- albeit, with a bit of mild confusion.

  Ironically, the brother that would have once understood better than anyone what it feels like to be in a body you don’t want….just happened to be the brother who had recently forgotten that he usually had dysphoria. 

  Donnie supposed that in a post apocalyptic world where gender was so irrelevant that Raph hadn’t even realized he was trans, it wouldn’t even occur to Raph to be dysphoric. (Hm. Maybe the end of the world had its good sides!)

  But secretly, selfishly, a twisted part of Donnie wished that Raph was still in the state of mind to relate to them. It was unfair, and a cruel thing to wish on his brother. Logically, Donnie knew that. But maybe a part of them wanted to just…feel a little bit more understood. Less like an alien. 

  It wasn’t like he didn’t notice the way you and Raph flinched when he entered the room, looking at them like he was some- some thing. Some freak. Maybe a cruel voice in the pits of his now-wire-filled stomach whispered things about how much he wished Raph remembered how it felt, how much a part of him wished you had been mutated in the explosion  so someone, anyone would understand the soul-crushing loneliness of not being in the right body-

  Shit. That was dark. Maybe he was losing more of his humanity than he’d initially theorized-

  Donnie swallowed their thoughts and opened the fridge, only to close it again upon remembering that he was physically incapable of eating,

***

Day 21.

  “AAAAUGHH!” Raph screamed, dropping to his knees on the dead grass. He threw his arms around his stomach- something in his guts felt like something had crawled in there and died and oh shit was this that girl thing?

  “Raph! Are you okay?!” Said Donnie, dropping his bo staff and rushing over.

  “Ow- ow- shit- Donatello, I-I gotta take a -oh- a -ow- a break from practicin’.” Raph grunted, using Donnie’s arm to pull himself up. 

  Time to go fucking deal with this now, he supposed. Just what his stupid life needed right now.

***

Day 24.

  “AAAAIIIEEE!” Raph screeched, chucking the stupid fucking salad prongs across the room.

  “Raph! Dude!” You snapped. “Look, I know you’re frustrated but ya can’t expect to get it right the first time!”

  “Well it’s NOT my first time using sais, is it? Aren’t I supposed to have some kinda muscle memory or whatever?!” He snapped back.

  “Raph, bud, bear with me- you lost your memory, hon’.” You sighed. “You gotta be patient with yourself.”

  “Maybe my self needs to hurry up already.” Raph said, crossing his arms. 

  See, it would be one thing if he’d entirely forgotten how to use his sais. But the thing was- he did remember. He remembered the feeling of their leather, he remembered spinning them and smirking at himself in the bathroom mirror, he remembered holding them in his fists and destroying things and how satisfying it was- but he couldn’t do those things anymore.

  It was just as fucking pointless to try as drawing had been.

  Shit, there were tears in his eyes.

  “You okay, Rafa?” You said gently, doing that annoying thing you did where you reached for him. He always let himself hope that you would actually follow through with it this time…he wasn’t sure why, exactly, but it always felt like a stab to his metaphorical heart everytime you lowered your hand instead of patting him on the shoulder or squeezing his hand or giving him a hug or anything oh good lord he’d take anything- You lowered your hand again, and yet again he felt something shatter in his chest. (Why did he still bother to hope? He’d just thrown his sais in anger. Of course you were nervous around him.)

  He rolled his eyes. “Yeah, whatever, (Y/N). I’m fine.”

  “...Okay…well…I’m here to talk if you need me, y’know?” You said, smiling softly.

  “I don’t wanna talk.” He grumbled. I want a hug, I want warmth, I want someone to say everything is gonna be okay-

  You nodded, staring at him sadly. “...Okay.”

  You left the makeshift dojo, leaving him alone with the blank walls of what had once been a living room.

  Raph wiped his eyes and glared at your retreating figure, half-aware that his anger was misplaced. It wasn’t like you’d done anything other than be understanding and supportive…but still.

***

Day 25.

  “BACK OFF!” Raph yelled, glaring at the robot.

  “Raph, it’s okay, it’s me, your brother! Donatello!”

  Raph had brothers?

  …No, that didn’t sound right- this robot was probably here to hurt him- a vague memory of fighting a similar robot flashed through his mind, reaffirming his certainty that this thing was bad and dangerous and wanted to hurt him-

  He bit back a whimper as the robot got closer, instead snarling as viciously as he could. “Get away from me ya fucking toaster.”

  The robot stepped back.

  Huh. The…robot stepped back…?

  The robot in his memory shifted into a turtle with a worried look on his face and a gap in their teeth and a purple mask.

  Donatello.

  Oh…right. This was Donatello. His brother. He was at the farmhouse with you and Donatello….Donatello who was a robot now.

  “Shit.” Raph mumbled, staring at the robot that was Donatello. “I…I did it again, huh?” 

  “RAPH! DEE! Jeez, are you guys okay?! I heard yellin’ and-'' You said, slamming the door open. The kitchen door. Raph was in the kitchen. The farmhouse kitchen.

  “Just…another incident. Don’t worry about it.” Raph muttered sullenly, wiping the spit off his mouth that he must’ve gotten from all the animalistic hissing.

  “Ah.” You said. “Are you both…okay then?”

  Donnie nodded wordlessly, ducking out of the room with his head down and shoulders slumped.

  Raph scowled, hugging his knees to his chest. “Same as I usually am, I guess.”

  “So…not great?” You frowned.

  “Not great.” He confirmed.

  “Ah.” You leaned forwards hesitantly, hand outstretched. 

  This time Raph didn’t even flinch when you inevitably lowered it and followed Donatello out of the room. He just shoved his face into his kneepads and tried really hard not to cry.

***

  Donnie slipped outside, staring out at the wasteland that used to be a forest.

  Raph had forgotten him again. 

  Honestly, they didn’t know why it hurt so much. It wasn’t the first or even the second or third time Raph had forgotten him…but Raph went into the feral mode around Donnie way more than he did around you. 

  And logically, Donnie knew exactly why that was. You looked the same as you always did, albeit more battered and less smiley, while he, Donnie, looked entirely different. He was entirely different. 

  His sensors picked you up behind him on the porch.

  “Hey.” They said glumly.

  “Hey Dee.” You said, sitting on the porch steps next to him.

  “I don’t think the world will ever heal again, (Y/N).” Donnie said softly. 

  Your eyes grew glossy (although maybe they already had been), and you looked away from them. “...I know.”

  “I miss everyone so much.” He whispered.

  “Me too.” 

  “Casey and I first became friends in that barn…April kissed me by the stump…” He said, trailing off. He put a hand on his face, remembering where Casey had first kissed him. That had also been at the farmhouse…

  God, they missed Casey and April.

  You nodded. “Me and Raph once buried a dead turtle over there…it used to be the prettiest part of the yard.” You said bitterly, pointing towards the spot where the pond had been just a month ago. Now it was reduced to another patch of dry, dying grass.

  “So it was a turtle? I thought you guys killed someone.” Donnie said, only half joking- They remembered vaguely how he’d walked in on Leo lecturing a guilty-looking you and Raph on ‘honorability’ one morning. They’d glanced outside to see a suspicious grave outside that hadn’t been there the night before, and put two and two together…nice to know that it was just an unmutated turtle.

  “Yeah…Raph thought it was like, a blow to his masculinity or something to tell you guys that he cared about animals.” You said with a snort. 

  “Well that’s stupid, we all know he loved animals. He was like a Disney princess around them.” Donnie said, shaking their head. 

  “Yeah…very true.” You smiled. 

  “What do you plan on doing about your whole….thing with Raph, anyways?” They said, changing the subject in hopes of distracting their thoughts from existential dread.

  You sighed, running a hand down your face. “Fuck, man. I don’t know. Like…I love him so much, but it’s not fair for me to right now. He’s vulnerable and scared and doesn’t even know who we are half the time…how can I put the pressure of a relationship, or even the implications of a past relationship, on him right now? That’s just…so unfair. Plus, we’re the only people he has right now. What if he thinks not liking me will mean us…like, kicking him out or something fucked up like that? What if he tries to force himself to feel the same just out of guilt? What if-”

  “Well first off, overthinking things? That’s my job, stay outta my turf.” Donnie teased. You smiled slightly. “Secondly- who says you have to tell him? Because you really don’t.”

  “Well, he’s not dumb, Don- he’s figured out that I’m hiding something.” You said dryly.

 “Are you though? Because I’m pretty sure you’ve been fairly honest about things- he’s your best friend. He always was. Just say ‘yeah we were like close or something’, you know? It’s not like you guys ever kissed or anything, at least not much, so it’s not much of a stretch.” Donnie suggested.

  You nodded. “Yeah…I guess you’re right…who knew you were so good with relationship advice?”

  “Nah, I just know you and Raph pretty well.” He chuckled.

  You smiled, putting an arm around his shoulders in a side hug. “Thanks Don.”

  “Hey, thanks for distracting me from my existential dread.” They snorted, hugging you back.

***

  Day 35.

  “What if I can’t feel feelings?” Said Donnie, lying awake next to you.

  “Hnnghh…Go to sleep Donnie.” You grunted, pulling your blanket tighter around your shoulders.  It may have been more secure and safe to have all three of you stationed in the Shellraiser rather than the house, but man, between Raph’s snoring and Donnie’s shitty sleep schedule that you knew full well he had programmed himself to have, it certainly made sleeping hard.

  “But what if this is all a dream! What if I died and this is a severely messed up dream I’m having in my last few minutes of life?”

  “Shut up Donatello.” Raph groaned, trying to muffle Don’s voice with a blanket.

  “What if I'm in a coma and I’m dreaming this and the Earth is actually fine?”

  “Go to sleep, broooo…” You moaned, covering your ears with a pillow.

  “I don’t usually go into sleep mode for another…mmm…two hours.” Donnie said. “Damn…sleep mode! (Y/N), I’m not a person anymore, am I?!”

  “Donatello. Buddy. Pal. I love you dearly. You are a beautiful,  fantastic, brilliant person. Let me fucking sleep.” You hissed.

  “...Mmm…Okay. G’night.” There was a click, and Don-bot powered down.

  “Oh thank god.” Raph grunted, shoving his face into his pillow.

  He proceeded to snore incredibly loudly.

  You groaned. 

***

  You blinked your eye open at the sudden silence.

Raph had somehow wound up with his arms tightly wrapped around your arm in his sleep. He was shivering, which made sense considering the cold.

  You were tempted to pry him off so that he wouldn’t be awkward or uncomfortable when he woke up. But he looked so peaceful, and you missed this…

  Plus you were too tired to do anything. So maybe you’d let him stay…

  You’d pry him off before morning though.

***

Day 37.

  Raph was pretty sure that Past Raph had had the hots for you. He’d finished reading through his old sketchbook, and it was full of little paragraphs in the margins and crossed out text where he could just barely make out the word ‘(Y/N)’. 

  He supposed it made sense. He may not have remembered too much of his life, but he had a decent recollection of what pretty people looked like- and you definitely fit that category. Plus, you were funny and cool and sweet….not that it mattered much nowadays. 

  After all, Past Raph and Current Raph’s circumstances were vastly different. So maybe a part of him was tempted to bug you for more info…but he knew enough to just let it be. 

  That was the Old World. 

  In the New World, trivial things like relationship status mattered very little. 

  (Still, was it really asking so much to have someone who’d hug him? Was he so wrong to wish for a hand on the shoulder once or twice, the way you always were in those goddamned photos?)

  (Meh, probably.)

  He hugged himself, staring up at the ceiling. 

  “Oh hey, you’re awake!” You grinned, poking your head into the Shellraiser. “Mornin’ Sleeping Beauty! Breakfast is inside if you want it.”

  Raph sat up slowly. “Okay…”

  “How’re you doing?” You said as you led him across the yard. It was still cold and dark out, and Raph shivered.

  “...Tired.” He grunted.

  “Understandable.” You nodded. “I’ve been pretty tired too, but it’s so hard to sleep when it’s so freakin’ cold at night and like, a million degrees the instant the sun rises.” You complained, passing him a plate of eggs from the remaining unmutated chickens. 

  “Says you, the one who's warm-blooded.” Raph teased.

  “Oh shit, you must be so cold at night!” You said, seeming to have just remembered that Raph was a reptile. 

  “Freezing.” Raph nodded. 

  “Maybe Don can build a heat lamp!” You suggested. “They’re still in sleep mode right now, but we can ask when he wakes up.”

  Raph perked up. “Wait, that exists?”

  “Yeah, shit- I can’t believe I didn’t think of that like…forever ago. I guess I forgot that you’re cold-blooded…and now that Donnie is…non-blooded, it must’ve slipped their mind too…I’m so sorry Rafa!” You exclaimed.

  “Wait. So this WHOLE TIME I could’ve NOT frozen my tail off every night?!” Raph groaned.

  You shrugged weakly. “...Yup.

  “This is so stupid.” He sighed, stabbing his eggs with one of his sais.

  “Dude…you're using that as a fork?” You cringed.

  Raph scowled. “Well it’s not like I know how to use it as a weapon anymore.”

  “But…but…Raph you have stabbed through people with those! There is no way that that’s even slightly sanitary!” You squeaked.

  He shrugged and ate his breakfast off the end of the sai. 

  You looked ill. “You are… such a teenage boy. Please stop.”

  He sighed but swapped the sai for a fork. “Okay, okay. Jeez.”

  “Thank you.” You groaned, patting his shoulder unconsciously.

  And suddenly it felt like his brain had short circuited.

  Oh god, he remembered you. 

  How could he have ever forgotten you?! All the memories shot into his brain at record speed- sitting on a fire escape with your arm around his shoulders, spray painting the side of TCRI, making fun of Casey and Donnie’s crushes on April, beating up bad guys, the look on your face- that toothy grin that you never ever wore theses days, a familiar hand resting comfortingly on his shoulder- and oh god, he remembered you!

  “I- I…(F/C)!” He gasped. You jerked your hand away guiltily, but he caught it before you could. “(Y/N). Your favorite color is (F/C)!”

  “W-what?” You said, eyes wide.

  “(Y/N) I remember! I-I remember you! Not everything probably, but- but I remember you!” He exclaimed, gripping your hands in his.

  Your eyes widened even further. “Raph, you- what?!”

  He grinned and hugged you to his chest as tightly as he could. Tentatively, you relaxed into it, rubbing his shell gently.

  “I remember you!” He exclaimed. 

  You nodded, still looking baffled. “Like…what?”

  “I remember how we met- I fell onto your fire escape! A-and I remember eating breakfast here with you and talking about…well, something, probably, but it was definitely here at this table! And I remember…I had this pet turtle, right? I think his name was…Slash? No! Spike! Slash was the mutant…? Whatever! I remember you sitting….uh…there, by that broken window, and I drew this picture!” He grinned, holding up a page in his sketchbook. It was a portrait of you, with soft shading and a bold outline. 

  “Woah, Raph?! You just- remember all this?!” You said, still staring in disbelief.

  “Bits and pieces, yeah- I think it was ‘cause you…you know, touched me. It’s like…muscle memory? I dunno. Might hafta ask Donnie…”

  “Raph!” You grinned, hugging him tightly. “I just- wow! This is so cool, I-”

  “Woah, are we interrupting somethin’?” Said a familiar voice.

  You and Raph jolted into defensive positions, hopping up to face the person-

  And then your brain seemed to short-circuit.

  “Casey?” You squeaked. “CASEY!”

  “(Y/N)! RAPH! Dude I can’t believe we finally found you!” Casey shrieked just as loud, diving in to grab you and Raph in a messy group hug.

  You grinned, hugging your friends close. “Casey Jones, I’m so glad you’re okay- fuck man, I thought you must’ve gotten kraang-ifed…”

  Raph pulled away, staring at Casey. “You’re…the skeleton dude- Casey Jones?”

  “Uh, no duh- who else would I be?! Casey Jones is in the flesh babeeyy!” He grinned, pumping his fist.

  “Raph…uh…hit his head in the mutagen bomb, Case’.” You mumbled, and Casey’s grinning facade shattered.

  “Oh. Shit.” He said, staring at Raph. “Do you remember…like…anything?”

  Raph shrugged dejectedly. “...Some of it. I remember…you and I would spray paint, I think? I remember a lotta (Y/N) apparently…I’ve got some vague recollections of Donatello, mostly their nerd-stuff…”

  “Jeez man. That’s…depressing as fuck.” Casey said, blunt as he’d always been.

  “Yeah.” Raph grunted.

  “So…is it just you?” You asked, fearing the worst.

  “Naw, I just found you guys first.” Casey  smiled. “Red n’ Angel are searching upstairs…but I hear them coming down right….now.” He said, nodding right as the sound of two people tripping and falling off the treacherous stair-rope Donnie had installed.

  “Oooh.” You and Casey winced.

  “How ‘bout you? Any sign of the others? …Where’s Donnie?” Casey’s voice lowered for the latter, in an anxious tremor.

  “Dee’s….fine. They just…look different than they did last time…you saw them. And…they’re pretty insecure about it.” You mumbled.

  “Casey! Casey, we found evidence of someone upstairs- (Y/N)?! Raph!” April said, running into the kitchen as she noticed you. “You guys are here!”

  “C’mon O’Neil, rule one of bein’ a ninja is ‘Don’t ever question the vague instructions you get from graffiti’. Didja ever doubt it?” You teased, grinning.

  “I-I was so worried, guys! I thought that since my psychic powers stopped working-”

  “Woah, how’d that happen?”

  “Too many big auras now. They’re impossible to tell apart…trying just gives me a headache.” April explained. “But I thought it meant that you might’ve been dead…” She whispered, and Casey put an arm around her shoulders.

  “Woah. So this is your turtle, Case’?” Said a new voice, and a teenage cat mutant leaned into the kitchen. “Hi.”

  Raph only grunted in response, and the cat mutant that must’ve been Angel nodded. “Fair.”

  “So where is Dee then?” Casey said.

  “Shellraiser. In…uh…sleep mode.” You said. “I’ll go get him…but would you guys mind…shit this sounds wimpy. But could you guys…come with me?” You muttered. A part of you was 100% convinced that the instant you left them they would all fade away.

  But Casey, who would usually make fun of you for such a childish request, slung his other arm around your shoulders- and you realized he probably felt exactly the same. 

  “Sure thing.” He said, smiling softly.

  “Thanks guys.” You beamed.

  You were finally smiling the way you did in the photographs.

  Raph couldn’t help but smile too. 

***

  When Donnie woke up from sleep mode on Day 37 of the Mutant Apocalypse, he was greeted by four familiar faces- two of which were the only faces he’d seen at all in the past month, and two of whom were what convinced him that they were probably somehow dreaming. 

  But they were a robot, and dreaming wasn’t physically possible anymore.

  So that meant this must, somehow, be real.

  “Hey Donnie.” Said April, smiling at him, and he wanted to cry even though he didn’t have eyes.

  “‘Sup Don.” Said Casey, grinning his gap-toothed grin that looked so much like Donnie’s old one.

  “You’re here.” Donnie whispered, feeling his new antennae shoot up. “Holy chalupa you’re HERE?!” 

  You smiled, helping him up. “Hey Dee, I forgot to tell ya- we’ve got company.”

  Donnie stared at the humans. They were here. He had so many questions, but most importantly-

  “D’you guys like the new look?” He chuckled, only half joking.

  Casey shrugged. “It’s different, but it looks metal as fuck.”

  “Yeah that’s ‘cause it is metal, ya meathead.” Said Raph, smiling.

  “It looks so cool Dee.” April said, smiling warmly. 

  Donnie really really wished they could still emote right about now, because the dopey grin that they would have grinned for that was unreal.

***

Day 40.

  You and Raph lay on the roof of the farmhouse, watching the red sun set, leaving the sky that weird glowing purple color that it had begun to adopt.

  (It really did remind you of some of those old Space Heroes episodes.) 

  “I really miss the stars.” You said lightly. “But I guess this is sorta pretty too, huh? In like…a weird way.”

  “Hey, isn’t that true for all of this shit?” Raph said. “I really miss the stuff in those photos, those glimpses I get of the life we had before…but hey. In a weird…sort of fucked up way…this life is kinda nice too. Don’t get me wrong. It’s really frustrating, I hate my brain most of the time, and I’m like 90% convinced that I’ll never really be the same person…but at least I’m not alone in it, y’know?” He sighed.

  You took his hand, squeezing it gently, and he squeezed back, and continued. “I’ve got you and Donnie. I guess now I’ve got Casey, Angel, and April too, and if they survived, who's to say my brothers didn’t?”

  You nodded. “Yeah…I guess if we’re out here on this road to nowhere, there’s no one who I’d rather have on my side.” You chuckled half-heartedly. “Still sucks though.”

  “Yeah, it really does.” Raph agreed.

  You smiled and pulled him into a side hug, suddenly swallowed by bittersweet nostalgia for those days when the biggest threat was Shredder.

  But hey, Raph had a point. 

  At least the outcome, well perhaps a huge downgrade from the breathtaking beauty of the stars, was still sorta pretty.

  At least you were on the road to nowhere together.

***

Author's note: I am so glad that Mutant Apocalypse was made into an AU. If it had wound up as the canon ending, that would be...messed up, man. But I like it as an AU, and I hope you've enjoyed journeying through it with me- it's a sad sad ride, but boy did I have fun writing it.

[yorshie]

Okokok but if there had to be a song that the Bayverse boys sang or just played for their S/O (either to serenade them or just to share something he thought was neat) - what would it be and why?

(◕‿◕)

Oh! Ok! I’m sorry I guess I thought way too hard on the first one lol. I get what you mean now!

(Yorshie used growl. Yorshie is confused. Yorshie hurt herself)

Snort. Let’s see let’s see~ (thinking outside the trash box) god there’s so much music. Oh my god where do I go~

Michelangelo - Hands Down by Dashboard Confessional. (If you’ve heard of this and are trying to block it out. I’m sorry. But! If you haven’t, I hope you’re ready to cry lol) but my reasoning is it’s a song about love, and it’s a song about two people existing outside the expectations of others. Also it’s super sweet and I can hear him singing while dancing with his S/O around the room. I think Mikey would really serenade his S/O with anything under the sun though. Turtle would try with Elmo’s World if it came on the tv, probably switch it up and make it “Mikey’s World” or something.

Donnie - Believe by Cher. OR OR OR take me home tonight by Eddie Money. Yes. I said that with a straight face. You can be mad. You can hate me it’s ok. Don’t think I haven’t forgotten that Dee is a major Dorkasaurous Rex. (Or would be be a Doyouthinkhesaurous?<- haha. Reference for the win) He would serenade the pants off his S/O with this song. He’d wait til everyone else was asleep and crank up his Lab’s speakers, that’s it new headcanon unlocked new music genre to associate Donnie with ok people we’re done here pack it up~

Leo - when I first got into the fandom, there was this one shot by memes-in-a-half-shell called “All I Wanted Was You” and I. Fell. So. Hard. For Leo over it. I cried over it. And now I can’t ever get him completely free from Hidden in the Sand by Tally Hall because of it. Everytime I hear it I just imagine Leo swaying his S/O in his arms, humming into their hair. Yeah. Imma go cry now. (Yorshie is confused. Yorshie hurt herself once again). Another one I could see is She Lit a Fire by Lord Huron. If his S/O’s not fem, he’d change the She accordingly I’m sure.

Raph - ooooo big red might be the hardest. Give me a moment~ ok. Whew. Gave it a little bit. Can I say Señorita or Mercy by Shawn Mendes? Cuz I feel like that’s about as soft music wise as Raph’s capable of. I feel like he falls more towards the “seduction not serenade” end of the music spectrum. Like. If this turtle starts playing music for his S/O or a song comes on and he looks over at them. Haha~ Nice knowing you hypothetical person. Good luck and all that.

[trashiewrites]

Some things never change

Pairing: Rise!Leo x F!Reader

words: 753

A/N: Okay! So my new obsession! I swear ill go back to cod but I needed to get this out my system! I may or may not do more ROTTMNT content idk not sure yet! Alrighty hope to those that read this enjoy!!!

WARNING: POST-MOVIE SO MOVIE SPOILERS?? KIND OF?? NOT REALLY!!

"LEO!!" (Y/n) rushed over, wrapping the blue turtle in her embrace. Resting her head on his shoulder as she sobbed. "You IDIOT! Scaring me like that! Scaring everyone!" She gripped onto his plastron, tears rolling down her face. Leo slowly placed a hand on her head, softly caressing her scalp. "I thought I'd never see you again! Your generally crappy one-liners, your charming smile," she went on and on; the others stood behind staring fondly at the two. They all shared her sentiment.

Leo moved her to see her face, "Woah Woah, you saying you don't like my one-liners!" He cupped his hands around her face wiping fresh tears as they fell. "First of all, how dare you~" he cooed at her, "secondly... I'm sorry. Keeping you safe, keeping everyone safe was my first priority." He spoke in a serious yet sincere tone, flashing her his iconic grin. She couldn't be angry as much as she wanted to be, she was just scared. "If my sacrifice promised you a better life, I would in a heartbe-"

"A world without you Leon, god, I can't even imagine it!" She wrapped her arms around his neck, resting herself in the crook of his neck. "Leonardo, I think I speak for everyone that without you; life, the world would be incomplete." Leo's eyes open wide, hearing those words come from her mouth. The others nod as Leo's eyes scan the room; overwhelmed by emotion, his eyes well with tears. Casey Jones looked on seeing the two acting like this made him relieved. It made of think back to his times, times he would be up late seeing master Leonardo sitting alone on the lookout.

Especially after the death of Raph and Donnie, Master Leo looked at those wastelands with a cloud of fear. Nights were then joined by his wife, who always brewed him a fresh cup of tea. The two always talked till late into the night, and despite being in the apocalypse the two always laughed about something. She kept Master Leo looking forward, looking straight. In the hell he lived in, he never saw a man happier in his life.

Coming back to reality Casey sighed, "I'm glad some things never change." He smiled, not yet realizing how loud he said that.

"What doesn't change Casey!" Mikey leaned closer to Casey, staring up at him intently.

"Oh sorry, I didn't mean to say that so loud! It's nothing!" He laughed nervously; he pulled his mask down slowly. His face flushed red from embarrassment.

"No no, go on Casey. I'm deathly curious now!" Leo raised his brow, giving him a smirk. Casey rubbed the back of his neck, "let me guess! Me being the greatest and strongest ninja ever~"

"Leo!" The group laughed in unison as he shrugged. (Y/n) wiped tears from her eyes as she stared lovingly at Leo. "All that talk about it not being about you!"

"What can I say, old habits die hard~"

"Okay shut it, Leo, let him speak." Donatello pulled out a notepad and waited intensely, "the next thing he says could possibly expand my research into quantum time theories and the existence of multiple timelines!"

"It's nothing that important," Casey rubbed his shoulder, "It's just for those two, even despite future changing their care for each other hasn't. It's kind of a relief to me." Casey raised his mask again, his eyes down to the floor, "I even see why they got married in my time..."

"MARRIED!" The room went into chaos after Casey spoke these words. Mickey and Raph were gushing, April wasn't reacting that much but had an approving look. Donnie threw his notepad on the floor in a huff and Splinter well he was silent, eyes closed while nodding his head; who knows what happens in there... (Y/N) was a stuttering mess, Leo watched her in amusement and even teased her from time to time. In any case, Casey should have never said it.

"Some things really never change" he spoke quieter this time. No need for another freakout.

BONUS!!

Leo: See (y/n)! We were destined for each other!

Y/n: M-m-m-m-ma-ma...

Leo: oooohhhh a wedding in an apocalyptic time, that must have been fun! Butalsolikereallydepressing... did we go on a honeymoon?

Casey: You guys got married before I was born so idk...

Y/n: m-m *passes out momentarily*

Leo: oughhh boi, I think we genuinely lost her... oh she must be so happy she died~

All: LEO!

Leo: JOKING joking! Jesuss- she passes out when she gets super overwhelmed, she's fine!

[turtle--soup]

Next Mutation episode 8 liveblog beneath the cut

"You said there would be babes here!" Mikey my dude you fell for that? Unless there's just been some genuine miscommunication here. Mikey asks if there's gonna be babes and Donnie's like 'hmm there's probably going to be intelligent women there as well...' "Yes Mikey there will be babes. Obviously."

"I'm emailing him directly into his brain" Nice. Plot relevant?

Ooh laser light show!

I have no idea what's going on.

Oh they kidnapped Quease okay.

I have this theme tune playing in my head 24/7 please send help

"Ey, have a ball heh heh heh" Honestly Raph being relatable again. My sense of humour and delivery exactly lol

Leo you can't get mad at her for not knowing sports terminology she's adorable stop bullying her 😤

"Donnie's hero is a complete wackazoid" Well that tracks I guess

"May I eat you?" "Certainly not." Interaction of the century

I wish I could make literal mental notes for myself ngl

Donnie trying to bribe Mikey with food, Leo by polishing his sword, Venus by meditating with her, Raph by sparring with him. Interesting that he apparently tried them in that order?

Squeaky toy noise. I love Wick.

Wtf even is that machine?

You can plug the controls into your brain? Some classic Demon Headmaster shit right there. (In that case you should be able to defeat it with puns. These guys will be fine.)

"They (mutants) invented themselves" I... guess you could see it that way?

"Ah shellacious I found you." I love how that was dropped in like a normal word honestly that was fun.

"Who who who who who who who who who WHO are you?"

Dude just listen to him ffs

God okay so he's siding with dragon dude bc he wants to use his lab to dissect Donnie. For science, you understand.

I lose 10 years of my lifespan whenever he says "Raph 'n' roll" I swear.

Did that vehicle roar at me? Like a big cat. Does it do that every time?

"Sassyyyyyyyyyy... I must remember to rectify that" You can't just do that to a Donnie, bro. It's built in.

Honestly poor Donnie. Never meet your heroes I guess

Every time Raph speaks I remember that it's Matt 'Ed from Ed Edd 'n' Eddy' Hill and I just asdghghfgdgk

Mikey whatcha doin?

Dragon dude why are you playing along with a knock knock joke? Come on.

Omg Mikey that's hilarious well done

Shelladelic. Honestly I might make an actual list. A frickin dictionary, perhaps.

Yeah that vehicle roared at me.

"Does your face hurt? Well it's killing me!" This Raph inherited 1987 Raph's Bumper Joke Book (I love that for him)

Splinter's question to Donnie about whether it's really Donnie who needs Quease to believe in him... 🥺 After he tried to dissect him and everything 🥺 Donnie I get it bro but you deserve better buddy.

[nagichi-boop]

I'm Not an Idiot (ROTTMNT fanfic)

I was held at gunpoint and told to write this because I was being mean to myself. /j

Jk, I actually had this idea and was given an excuse to write it. So without further ado...

— x —

April scowled at her homework, impatiently tapping her pen against her head. Leo, who was sat reading a comic nearby, looked up to see his friend struggling.

“You good over there, April?” he asked curiously.

“Yeah, I’m dandy,” April answered sarcastically. She stared at her work for a few moments before before sighing loudly and leaning back in her seat. “This homework is impossible! Why did teach give us this during our holiday week? It’s not fair.” She took a deep breath. “Sorry, I don’t mean to be this ridiculous over this.” “Nothing ridiculous about it,” Leo replied sincerely. “Do you need help?” “I might need it,” April admitted. Leo stood up and had just made his way to April before she continued speaking. “Do you think you can get Donnie for me? It seems like something he is best able to help me with.” Leo tensed up a little.

“Sure thing,” Leo smiled through gritted teeth, then began to walk away. He stopped. “By the way, you need to divide by 4 to isolate x.” April looked up in surprise, but before she had the chance to say anything, Leo had already left the room.

After briefly visiting Donnie in his lab to deliver April’s message, Leo went to his room and flopped on his bed face first, burying his head in his pillow. He grumbled into it frustratedly for a while.

“Leo, are you okay?” Mikey asked as he peered around into Leo’s room, startling Leo.

“How long have you been there?” Leo responded, turning his head to the side. “I didn’t hear you walk up to the room.”

“Not too long,” Mikey answered, then smiled proudly. “I have been practicing my sneaking.”

Leo frowned, then turned his head to face the wall. “I’m not in the mood for jokes right now, Mikey.” Mikey paused for a moment before speaking again.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really,” Leo huffed in annoyance. After the room fell silent, Leo began to feel guilty. “But…I guess I wouldn’t mind some company.”

“You sure? I can leave you be if that would be better for you.” “It’s fine,” Leo insisted, speaking more softly than he had before. Mikey walked into Leo’s room, sitting down and leaning beside his bed. They remained quiet for a bit before Leo began to feel restless. “If I tell you what’s wrong, you won’t snitch to anyone?” “Of course not,” Mikey assured. “Dr Feelings doesn’t share information about his patients.” “I don’t want to talk to Dr Feelings,” Leo bemoaned. “I want to speak to Mikey.” “Oh,” Mikey responded, a little surprised. He smiled again. “I can do that, too.”

Leo remained silent for a while, trying to compose his thoughts. “I guess…I’m just a bit annoyed that people seem to underestimate me all the time.”

“What do you mean?”

“April was doing her homework earlier and didn’t even ask if I could help before she told me to get Donnie for me,” Leo clarified. “I mean, I know I’m not very smart and Donnie is definitely in a better position to help April, but for some reason it still annoyed me.”

Mikey hummed thoughtfully. “It sounds a little like imposter syndrome to me,” Mikey commented. “Which…is a poor name for it.”

“What’s that?”

“Well, it’s more of a narrative that someone has rather than a syndrome, which suggest it’s an affliction that-”

“No no,” Leo interrupted. “I mean what is imposter syndrome?”

“Oh, my bad,” Mikey apologised, playfully poking his tongue out. “It’s a term people use to describe someone who believes they’re not qualified for something, even if there is plenty of proof to support the opposite. Everyone in the world could tell that person they are great at something, but they won’t believe it themselves. So in your case, you believe you’re not smart despite the opposite being true.” “Oh yeah?” Leo spoke, forcing an insincere smile. “What proof do you have of that?” “How many times have me, Donnie and Raph rushed into a situation that you insisted wasn’t safe? Who was is that accurately guessed what his brothers did when we fought against Shredder? Heck, who was it that tricked Big Mama in order to get the mystic collar?”

“I did,” Leo reluctantly acknowledged. “But you all still treat me like an irresponsible kid.” “That has less to do with you than it does us,” Mikey confessed. “Sometimes being aloof makes people make assumptions. They assume you’re irresponsible, stupid, immature; those kinds of things.” Leo spun his head around and looked down at Mikey. “That doesn’t mean that’s the truth, it’s just how others see it.”

“That was…awfully accurate and specific,” Leo remarked. He then paused and thought about it, then his eyes widened in realisation. “Wait, are you talking from personal experience?”

“See, you are smart!” Mikey chimed playfully.

“I’m sorry we’ve made you feel that way, Mikey,” Leo apologised remorsefully.

“It’s alright,” Mikey spoke half-heartedly. “I guess we are both a bit guilty of it, huh?” Leo sat up and began to pat beside himself, inviting Mikey to sit with him. His younger brother jumped at the opportunity, quickly standing and then taking a seat beside Leo. To his surprise, Leo placed his hand on Mikey’s head and gently guided it to his shoulder, then moved his hand to Mikey’s shoulder for a side hug. Mikey’s happy façade slipped a little and he closed his eyes to take in the moment.

“So you really don’t think I’m dumb?” Leo croaked insecurely.  

“Far from it,” Mikey replied without hesitation. “I know you insist you’re just the face man of the group, but I think we would all be genuinely lost without you.” They went quiet as Leo rested his head atop Mikey’s.

“I’m sorry for treating you like a kid sometimes,” Leo softly spoke.

“I mean, it’s not always a bad thing,” Mikey admitted. “I can go a bit off the walls sometimes. And you cut me a lot more slack than Raph does,” Mikey pouted.

“Yeah, I know what you mean,” Leo sighed. “But he’s not doing it maliciously. Raph just feels a heavy weight as the eldest sibling because he feels responsible for our safety.”

“But that’s not his problem,” Mikey spoke up, unaware of his volume, to which covered his mouth in shock.

“I know, but what we do and think isn’t always rational,” Leo noted. He then tensed up a little. “And, well…being put in the position of responsibility, I sort of understand how he feels.” Mikey looked up at him sadly. Leo took a deep breath, then smirked at Mikey. “I guess I’m glad I have such competent brothers.”

“And we are lucky to have such a smart leader,” Mikey grinned back. The two of them leaned closer into each other, smiling contently.

“Alright,” Leo suddenly spoke up, interrupting the silence. “Enough of this mushy stuff. What’s say we raid the arcade while Donnie is busy helping April?” “Are you sure you’re okay?” Mikey questioned out of concern. “I am here to listen if you have anything else on your mind.” “You’ve helped me plenty,” Leo confirmed. “But maybe I’ll take you up on that offer another day if that’s okay?” “I’m always down to listen to you,” Mikey assured.

“Thanks, little bro,” Leo spoke as he pet Mikey’s head. He then shot up off the bed, stretching his arms above his head before smirking smugly at Mikey. “Okay, enough stalling. Let’s race to the arcade. Last one there has to give up a slice of his pizza at dinner.” “Oh, you are so on,” Mikey contested. The two brothers grinned at each other knowingly, then immediately sprinted out of room on their way to the arcade.

— x —

I haven’t proof read this btw lol

[notavalidusername]

TMNT (any version—you pick) for the fandom ask game?

Heck yeah! I'm excited about this one because I've really only just gotten into tmnt, but, boy, have I watched a lot of it!!

Thank you so much for the ask!

I'm going with rottmnt, mostly. I'll specify versions if I'm jumping between them!

The first character I first fell in love with: Donatello. I watched Rise first, and he's just the best. He's got the tech, the sass, he's the funny one, he's obviously a genius, he loves his brothers, and he's got the best eyebrows (even if they are drawn on). Donnie is my favorite in every version I've seen. (1987, 2003, 2012, 2018, Bayverse)

The character I never expected to love as much as I do now: April! I was a little confused going into it why a girl hangs out with mutant turtles, but it makes sense now. I love the Rise version the best. She's so cool!!

The character everyone else loves that I don’t: Hmm. Idk, most if the characters are pretty lovable or at least entertaining. I don't really like Timothy from the 2012 version, but I haven't finished it yet, either. Idk if people like him or not, though.

The character I love that everyone else hates: I mean, the Rise Kraang, I guess? I love them as in they're really good villains for the movie. The stakes felt so high!

The character I used to love but don’t any longer: Draxum (not really, just bummed he wasn't in the movie!)

The character I would totally smooch (or hug): I'd give Rise Raph a hug. He's got a lot on his plate as the oldest. He just needs a little reassurance.

The character I’d want to be like: I'd have to say Leo. I could use some more leadership skills and excellent jokes to deal with tough situations. Though, I would also like to have some of Donnie's genius and mad dancing skills.

The character I’d slap: A slap for the Shredder!

A pairing that I love: There aren't really any pairings I love. The Splinter and Big Mama reveal was very entertaining, though!

A pairing that I despise: I guess April and Casey Jones. I haven't really seen it, but I hate the idea of it!

[anglepanda]

Leo x reader pt.5 confession

Narrator: it’s been a month since you knew the turtles and you were just leaving school until you got a text from Leo stating that he wanted you to visit him down in the lair because he wanted to talk to you about something…alone. So you called your parents(mom/dad) and said that you were heading to your friend Aprils house for the night they asked if you needed any clothes but you said no cause April had some for you they said ok and hanged up. When you got to the lair before you could even say anything to anyone Leo grabbed you by the arm gently and pulled you aside and to his room. When you two were in there alone you immediately started asking questions.

Reader: Leo!? What the heck is wrong with you I didn’t get to say hi to anyone yet you just pull me aside for no reason and for what!?

Leo: i-I’m sorry I wasn’t thinking right i just wanted to talk to you so badly…I guess I got a little too impatient…huh reader(your name).

Narrator: he looked at you with sad apologetic eyes and you couldn’t do anything but sigh and smile at him.

Reader: fine I forgive you Leo but I have to ask what was so important that I had to come down here just to be dragged into your room.

Narrator: when you said that Leo took a deep breath and gently rubbing your hands with his.

Leo: ok so…what i wanted to tell you was…well it’s really a confession.

Reader: a confession?…About what?

Leo: about my feelings…for you reader(your name)…

Reader: f-feelings for me…!?

Leo: yes…i had a crush on you since the day we’ve met reader(your name) and I was wondering if you wanted to be my…p-partner…

Narrator: you were flattered by what Leo said and you couldn’t say no cause you had a crush on him as well…so you agreed to be his partner and he smiled and gave you a gentle kiss on your lips you blushed but seeing Leo happy and becoming his partner was the best thing that ever happened to you. You started getting hungry and told Leo that you were going to order some pizza for y’all and the others. After ordering the pizza you decided to go tell April about you and Leo dating you didn’t tell Donnie,raph,Mikey,and splinter cause Leo wanted to without them freaking out about it.

Reader: hey April you got a minute…

April: yeah sure what’s up

Reader: ok don’t freak out but me and Leo are dating now…

April: wait…are you serious!

Reader: yeah…that’s why he wanted to talk to me so badly because he wanted to ask me to be his partner.

Narrator: April was really excited for you two she couldn’t believe you guys are finally together after all that time…you ignored her comment and said that you ordered pizza and that it should be here soon. When the pizza arrived you brought it into the kitchen and everyone came rushing in after dinner you were kinda tired so you gotten cleaned up and dressed but instead of heading to you room you went to Leo’s room instead and you snuggled up next to him and fell asleep he blushed,kissed your head gently and fell asleep.

[halfdeadfullgay]

Pepperoni Punks - Chapter 4

When you're talked into confessing your obvious crush(1/2)

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AN// This is the first part of a "holiday" special. The slow burn stops next chapter because I underestimated my ability to write a slow burn lol. Sorry if this is a short chapter, it was supposed to be longer and posted earlier but I had midterms and wanted to die.——————————————————————————Summary - Donnie and Mikey are annoyed with how long they have had to put up with Casey's and Raph's painfully obvious crushes on each. So, they come up with a plan to talk to each of them and have them each plan to ask the other out.

“Cya later, dudes!” Casey said as they left. They had left around noon, needing to pick up their sister. They had already said bye to Raph who was still in his room. Raphael came out a bit later to get something to eat. Luckily, there was not going to be any training today. Mikey was in there too, playing with Ice Cream Kitty in a cooler. “Hey Mikey!” Raph looked at the other. Mikey quickly turned to look at him with Ice Cream Kitty turning to look as well. “You good, dude?” Mikey asked. “Obviously. I need someone to talk and no one else is available.” Raphael told his brother. It was an obvious lie to excuse the whole conversation about feelings that would happen. “Well, spill it dude.” Mikey said as he sat Ice Cream Kitty on the counter. Raph took a minute, trying to figure out how to word it. “Well last night Casey slept in my room with me sharing the bed.”

“And? What happened, did you confess your painfully obvious crush?” Mikey teased. “No, Mikey! I mean techally I did, I guess.” Ice Cream Kitty meowed in curiosity, seeming to try to participate in the conversation. “They said good night then fell asleep on me and then I said good night and that I loved them. They didn’t hear me say it because they were asleep.” Mikey rolled his eyes, “Man, you messed your chance. You should’ve said it before.” Raph groaned in frustration, “Leo said that as well. He also suggested that I should do something nice or something they like with them and then confess.”

“1. That’s good advice but 2. you really went to Leo before me?!” Mikey acted offended. “I didn’t ask Leo, he was fucking eavesdropping!” He sighed and took a breath. “What should I do? I know that they would like to play some street hockey and obviously smoke and get pizza but what if that’s not what they want before a confession or-“ Raphael didn’t like this feeling. He didn’t like this type of anxiety. He especially didn’t like his siblings seeing him this anxious. “What if I mess things up? What if-“

Mikey cut Raph off, “Hey, everything will be fine. I’ll help you come up with a game plan.” Raph nodded a thank you. Donnie appeared out of nowhere, “I’m heading out, Casey and I are going to the junk yard. I’ll be back with pizza. I’d be telling Leo this but he is in her Space Heros trance.” Mikey told him to just go, that he didn’t need anyone’s permission. “I thought that Casey had to pick up their sister.” Raph said. “Casey just texted that she is staying with her friend for another night and that they will be staying over tonight if we don’t have any plans for tomorrow.” Donnie explained quickly before leaving.

“Guess we have to plan something now.”

-

“Alright, Camel Face. What parts are you looking for specifically?” Casey asked as they lead the way to the part of the junkyard without cameras. “No need for insults, Cave Mouth. Anyways, I’m look for lights and some rims.” Donnie told them. He and Casey didn’t fight anymore unless sparing, they had actually found common ground when Donnie was working on the shell raiser. Casey just nodded, making a mental note. They were less talkative than they usually were when the two of them did supply runs. Donnie would’ve chalked it up as a connection of their behavior from the past few months but he could tell that something was actively bothering them. “Are you okay, Casey?” He asked, going to walk next to them. “Yes? I honestly don’t know.” They said, continuing to walk. They were thinking about last night, they thought about how they opened up to Raphael, how they thought they heard him say something before falling asleep and then how he helped them after a nightmare.

They weren’t oblivious to their own feelings about their best friend, the others weren’t either except for Raph. Donnie observed how Casey was acting and took some mental notes. “There is a high possibility that I will regret it but do you want to talk about it?” Casey was surprised that he was willing to let them talk about feelings. “Yeah. I slept in Raph’s room and we shared the bed. I opened up to him and shared a whole lot of shit that I haven’t told anyone else. I fell asleep in his arms twice, man.” Casey started talking. They held open a piece of the broken fence for Donnie. “And? From the tone of your voice, I can not tell if it’s bad or good.” He went through the fence, waiting for them on the other side. He did a check of his surroundings, making sure that no other humans were there. The junkyard didn’t have too many cameras or employees for that matter. So sneaking around wouldn’t be too difficult.

Casey followed, their hoodie getting ripped a bit. “It’s a good thing, I guess. But it gets worse.” Donnie went to a pale of axles and wheels. “Worse?” He questioned. “What do you mean worse?” He started analyzing all the parts, trying to find the best ones. “Well, he comforted me after a nightmare. It was just unexpected. And..” Casey paused for a moment, “I think that he said that he loved me. I don’t actually know if he did but I heard him say something like that before falling asleep.” Donnie looked up at them, putting down the parts in his hands. “Are you sure? You could’ve just been sleep deprived.” Casey shook their head. “No. I know that I heard the word love.” They tried to take their mind off of it. They went to look at a pile of alternator. “But I know that one of you usually drop in to say good night. Besides I’m his best friend and not many relationships like that last. Besides, I’m pretty sure that he doesn’t even like me lik-“

“Oh dear gods! Casey just shush!” Donnie groaned. Casey looked at him. “It is so obvious to see that you two like each other. More so that he likes you! When you ‘disappeared’ for the last few months, he couldn’t stop talking about you and how worried he was about you.” He was annoyed at how long this had been going on. “Just tell him. Also, Mikey and I may have been planning to set you guys up.”

Donnie looked at Casey to see their reaction. “What?! What have you guys planned!?” They reacted just like he expected. “We didn’t plan anything. We just agreed to talk both of you into confessing and having a nice ‘not date’.”

Casey just rolled their eyes. “What are the suggestions for the ‘not date’?”

[fabuloustrash05]

ROTTMNT Love Interests Headcanon

If the Rise boys were ever given love interest, here’s who I headcanon they should’ve been and what their dynamic would be like:

Note: Raph and Mikey's love interest are my OCs/HCs of a Rise version of existing characters.

Leo’s love interest would be Yuichi

Leo met Yuichi through Hueso, who Yuichi works for as a new waiter for his restaurant in the Yokai city

Suddenly Leo constantly wants to go to Hueso's restaurant for lunch/dinner and his brother quickly figure out it's only because he wants to gawk at the cute new waiter.

Leo is overly flirty but Yuichi doesn’t notice him, not that he’s uninterested, it’s just he has lots of admirers, so sadly Leo in the beginning blends into the crowd.

It’s not until Leo takes a more forward approach by hitting on him with a cheesy pick up line, then proceeds to trip over himself and be humiliated by everyone, except Yuichi. He found the act endearing and Leo has now caught his eye.

Yuichi finds Leo annoying at first, but also charming/endearing thought he hates to admit it

*flirts* *flirts back* “I was not expecting this outcome, tf I do now??”

Leo tells a dumb joke and Yuichi thinks he’s a comedic genius.

They spar together, exchanging sword fighting tips/techniques

Hueso is their third wheel

Raph’s love interest would be Mona Lisa

My HC on how they first met (I guess you could say she really FELL for him ;D )

Mona is obviously in love with him but Raph is painfully oblivious. Everyone knows she likes him except Raph.

“She’s just a really good friend!” *said "friend" is wearing a shirt that says "I <3 Raphael"*

Raph would be very obvious to Mona's flirtatious actions towards him and not realize he's being hit on. Everyone knows Mona likes him, except Raph himself.

It took Raph a whole year to realize he liked Mona too. His bros can't comprehend his obviously stupidity when he asked his bros if he should ask Mona out and says he's worried she doesn't like him back (Raph end up freaking out and nearly faints when his bros tell him Mona has liked him the entire time)

She fell first, but he fell harder

For a while, Raph is conflicted with asking her out for a few reasons:

1) “What if she lost interest in me and I’m too late?!”

2) He feels he’s too busy as the oldest to have a relationship but his brothers encourage him to ask her out because him having a GF does not mean he’s being selfish for doing something for himself that makes him happy.

3) Mona’s got an overprotective father who hates the idea of his daughter dating. He liked Raph better when he was just her friend, but when Raph started having feelings for Mona he became a threat.

Eventually Raph does asks Mona out and she says yes! They become boyfriend and girlfriend shortly after their first date.

Everyone feels a wave of relief and satisfaction when these two FINALLY get together! "IT'S ABOUT DAMN TIME!" But everyone soon realized that they are annoying as a lovey dovey couple, "Stop shoving your happiness in our faces!!"

Donnie’s love interest would be Kendra

Partners in crime, on again off again romance

Fake dating trope in the beginning with them both having plans to steal each others tech, “I’ll woo him/her and when they’re off his/her guard, I’ll robbed them!”

They actually start to fall in love with each other, but then the truth comes out and they “break up”

Now constantly bicker anytime they see each other, blaming the other for the betrayal and “break up”

Check out my post on how I HC they first started “dating”

*Cue “True Love” by P!nk*

Argues then proceeds to make out then argue again

They are the first couple to get together, but them being really officially together is a secret. They secretly date after their first "break up" and everyone doesn't find out about them until much later on, to which Donnie just mentions he's actually dating Kendra so nonchalantly while everyone just looks on at him with shock. This is after Leo x Yuichi and Raph x Mona became couples.

Mikey’s love interest would be Renet

Renet is a human orphan who grew up in the Yokai City and is practicing to become a witch, specifically a time witch!

They met when Mikey was in the Yokai city and came across Renet when she was practicing her magic spells (aka she fell on top of him when practicing a teleportation spell)

Everyone struggles to figure out if they are dating or just REALLY close.

Best friends, goofy dummies who eventually fall in love with one another slowly over time

Innocent young love. A playground crush.

Mikey hangs out with her a lot because he likes her. He doesn’t realize he likes her and no one tries to tell him cause they thought he knew he liked her

Act like a couple loooooong before they even become a couple.

“Are you two dating or just friends?” “Yes”

That tweet of that girl asking her bf if they are dating (they are living together and have a kid) cause they never confirmed they are boyfriend and girlfriend, so when she asked the bf he responds by fist pumping his chest, giving her a peace sign and saying "we're just Bros"

[starry-kattz]

Okay, so I finally read the original TMNT one-shot (courtesy of V.1 of the Ultimate Collection and ...

....

....

I have so many thoughts.

Okay so, Shredder is their second fight. Ever. They fight and kill a group of Purple Dragons, it's their first real outing ever, and that's enough for Splinter to decide they're ready to take on the master assassin/crime-boss??? Also, speaking of Splinter, he kinda sucks as a person??? I guess they all do tho, like cycle of violence much. Yoshi probably wasn't much better, he was part of the Foot too after all. Anyways, Shredder is their origin story. He's not their story. What. Like, dude is so insanely impactful in so many iterations of their story and you're telling me Shredder-Prime fell off a building and blew himself up with his own grenade??????? Wtfwtfwtf. Yeah I know they won the fight first, but he really went out like a punk. How did this man acquire Main/Major Villain status? He lost a fight to some kids whose training was mostly theoretical at that point. Kids that he beat up and tired out first. That were trained by a rat. A rat that only is a ninja because he mimicked his owners training in a dojo. And he lost. To them. Like, I could see the Foot being a recurring problem. But I find OG Shredder kinda pathetic.

Circling back round to Splinter cause I got more to say about him. First! Rats don't live that long. Which I know isn't the point, but damnit I gotta say it. Like, my dude must've been a mutant rat already to live like 20 years before his master even got murked. It bears repeating- Splinter is a shit parent. How shitty? Depends on your personal opinion and your own relationship to your parent(s). But this rat gained sentience, watched four little baby turtles gain sentience, looked at them and went- ya know what these kids would be good for? Weapons! Then spent 13+ years making them ninja! And not cool-movie-good-guy-ninja like their modern version but the kind of ninja thug that caused this mess in the first place!!! It wasn't for self-defense or any kind of nobility or heroism, just straight up revenge. I'm sure the Rat is actually a cool dude and gains some complexity as the story goes on, but my god I can see why so many versions of him kinda suck as a parent. It's baked into his og character.

And as usual, the less said about what happened with Tang Shen the better. I will always say the woman deserves better until she gets it. I know this was originally a parody/one-shot wink-and-nudge towards Daredevil, so not complaining about it much. There's only so many pages to work with, and ultimately the backstory was just an excuse for weird Turtle Ninja violence. But also, it's weird to me that Shen apparently couldn't defend herself? She had to be part of the Foot Clan right? Like they wouldn't just let their ninja court whoever they wanted outside the clan right??? Nagi and Saki had a whole ass family that was apparently happy to help mold Saki into the Shredder. Like, they can't just not know right?? It wasn't like Yoshi and Nagi were going to a high school during the day, then Ninja Cram School at night. It's nuts to me that neither of them could defend themselves, but I suppose that's how fridging works.

I think if that had been it, it'd just be a fun one-shot by itself. It's kind of amazing to me that you can feel the echoes of this one comic from so long ago throughout the entire franchise and it's many iterations. The Turtles themselves are all kinda same-y in the One-Shot, but at the same time you can see very small seeds of the characters they would become being planted. Leo being the leader, obviously- it's his voice narrating a majority of the story, he's the one who reports their success back to Splinter, he's the one who rallies the others against Shredder, he gets the final stinger in. Raph gets to be the one to deliver the challenge to Shredder and says that he loves the night air, and Leo earlier notes Raph's love of fighting.

[turtle-go-brrrr]

The gang during movie nights

Leonardo

Easily impressed

Like, there is an arrow shooting off toward the camera and he's ducking

It's hilarious

He gets so invested, especially in shows, like I can't stress enough how attached to the characters he can be

Won't cry, but will be deeply hurt if anything bad happens

Doesn't handle r*pe scenes well at all (none of them really do, but he'sthe worst)

Doesn't understand why they need to be shown on screen when the implication of that act can be just as disturbing and powerful

Likes to know how good the actors were treated on set too

If he learns that they weren't treated well he's gonna shit on the director for a really long time

When no one can decide on a movie he's the one choosing

Will sometimes let you choose, but dont count on it very often

He loves thrillers and mysteries, trying to guess what will happen along the characters

Not as good at it as he thought he would be though

Donatello

Unless he's captivated by the movie, he's the worst person you could watch anything with

Talks constantly

Critiques any illogical thing he can see

Don't tell me about plot holes

Goes on and on about character development

Discussing a movie with him is fantastic, but watching it? No sir

Unless you're like that too

He has the best taste in movies tho

He loves indie movies the best

His favorite movies (as of late) is The Shape Of Water

(He just loves the fact that the two characters fell in love because of what they are instead of despite it)

(Also it's a monster lover movie and he secretly hopes he can find someone at some point)

Will put his legs on your lap but won't share the blanket

Will give you unlimited access to his stack of snacks tho

Raphael

Pretends to love horror movies because he's the Tough Guy but actually hates them

Either because they're not scary (and therefore cringy) or because they're too scary

And he doesn't like being vulnerable

Will watch any and all movies starring Vin Diesel

His favorite is Baby Sittor

Doesnt like the Fast and Furious movies as much as he makes it out, he just has a big crush on Diesel

Really likes animated movies

If they want to explore dark themes, they have to do so subtly instead of throwing blood and sex scenes in your face all the time

They have to be creative about everything and he likes that aspect

If you guys are watching an horror movie, he'll cling to you at every jumpscare and act as if he was just shifty

Will silently claim unbreake loyalty to you if you hold his hand during the scary parts

Will put you on a pedestal forever if you don't tell anyone about any of this

Michelangelo

Always in his phone

It's not because he's not paying attention, he just needs to do something at the same time to be able to pay attention better

ADHD amaright

Cries easily too

Not just from sadness, but from laughter too

Really likes comedies, but loves thrillers and drama even more

The shittier, the better

He just loves being fake interested in the characters life and criticizing every bad choice they make

"Don't go back with him Linda, he cheated on you!"

Ends up being real invested and cant take his eyes off of the screen (he gotta knows what happens next)

This is especially true with Christmas Hallmark movies

He knows exactly what will happen, the acting is bad and it's all too cliche

But he has to see it anyway

The ultimate snack maker, but won't share his

Will give you as many blankets and pillows as you need

Will also most likely fall asleep on you

Which is a huge problem when you need a bathroom break, because no one will help you move him without waking him up

April

She doesn't really have a favorite genre

But if there's murder in it, she's gonna live it

"I'm just saying, it would have been a lot better if he died after falling down the pit." "What did you expect from Dora the explorer?!"

Unironically loves really bad movies

Velocipastor, Vikingdom, Sharknado and the likes

They have this weird, we-got-drunk-and-made-a-whole-movie-before-the-hangover kind of energy that she loves

Don't let her choose the movie because she will choose this kind of trash film

If she manages to pull it off, you two will have the time of your life in from of this trash

Like constant laughter, trying to guess how far they'll take the absurdity etc

Just an honest good laugh

Casey

Adventure kinda guy

Like Indiana Jones, Jumanji, The Mummy, etc

He just loves the adventure and action ok

Especially if Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson is in it

He has a secret crush on him

(As secret as Raph's crush on Vin Diesel, so not so secret)

Also has a thing for romances

Really really likes them if they're somehow tragic

Like "two lovers getting separated during the war and finding each other again in the battlefield" kind of tragic

Doesn't like it if it ends on a bad and depressing note

Like it has to at least have a message of hope at the end

He's the one shushing everyone when it becomes too much

Also the one to refill snacks, and give you "secret" snacks if you help him

(It's your favorite candy)

Likes to act as if he was giving you drugs or soemthing when in reality it's like. Caramel

[moxfirefly]

Leo with prompt #8 please

Pretty pretty pretty please

With so many thank you on top. You're writing sends me into the best mood.

Aww shucks it always makes me happy to hear that!

Rated Explicit (18+ only)

Leo was an asshole.

Not just in general terms, an obvious statement that Raph could literally break his neck agreeing with you, but Leo was an honest to god asshole.

You wanted to throttle him. Possibly even slap him. Maybe knock over one of his bonsai trees.

Okay that would be cruel at the very least, guy loves his bonsais, but...

You felt another jolt rip through your body causing the drink in your hand to slosh about. Some of it spilled on the hardwood floor and by the looks of it Vern would have a coronary due to it. April placed a hand on your shoulder, concern in her eyes. “You alright y/n? You look a little in pain?” She was only looking out for you but the only thought in your brain was to just yell, ‘Leo is a fucking asshole’.

Speaking of said asshole, he was over by the billiards table, resting against it while Casey and Raph had their latest competitive bought. The blue banded leader was the very picture of innocence, hell he wasn’t even drinking the god damn boy scout. “Hey Leo, you ready to get your ass handed as soon I finish handing it to your brother” Casey rested his weight on the billiards stick, possibly another coronary for Vern who had them imported from some fancy woodwork place.

Leo was busy looking at his phone, his thumb running across the screen in a nonchalant flick. “Might have to rain check that one, Case” His expression was neutral, bored at best. “Oh come on man, my birthday my rules” The birthday boy in question frowned, even more so when a ball was knocked into the corner pocket where he was standing. “Sorry, chief Vincent has been texting me all night updates of a new case” He flicked his thumb more rapidly, Casey assumed probably pictures of the possible offenders.

“Are we working later?” Was Raph’s question as he lined up another shot, which Casey prayed he would miss. He didn’t naturally.

“I’ll let you know, but doesn’t seem so” Leo actually felt proud of himself, an honest to goodness lie out of his own mouth. You would be proud of him, if you weren’t busy glaring daggers at him.

The situation was the following, you had only yourself to blame, but it had occurred to you to incorporate some outside play with Leo. So, you had purchased a remote control vibrator, a fancy little egg shaped thing that was currently resting inside your underwear. It could be controlled remotely via a phone app and while Leo wasn’t big on public stunts like this, that reptile part of his brain was yelling in excitement.

Two hours.

Casey’s little birthday party had been active for two hours. Which meant a that Leo had been running dangerous circles around his phone screen and you were already forgetting how to walk and talk at the same time. Vern’s penthouse was a little more packed than the usual gang it could inhabit, a few off duty officers that Casey hung out with and knew the terrapins were there.

You had told April by now that your day of the month had come up and the cramps were just a little more harsh than usual. Knowing all too well those woes, she rubbed your arm affectionately. “You don’t have to stay if you’re too beat up” She was bummed out, it was fun to have a human female friend given her circumstances had her putting up with five testosterone filled men, four of which were literal giant turtles.

You shook your head with a smile. “And miss out on drunk karaoke? I’m good, I can handle- th-this” Oh that was dangerous, that was truly entering very dangerous territories. When your eyes landed on Leo, stupid smug brat with his pretty lips and holding his phone like the prized possession it currently was, you glared. Excusing yourself you made the slow walk towards Leo, he had been standing at the mini bar area (that you found clashed horribly in this man cave) looking quite proud of himself.

“I’m going to kill you” You stage whispered at him, a full smile on your lips. Your large terrapin boyfriend chuckled, phone at his side and his thumb making a series of swivels on it. A hand landed on his plastron, nails pressed harshly on the plates. “You look a little red faced, too much wine?” He turned slightly, reaching over the mini bar to grab a seltzer water.

“You are the biggest asshole at this party and that says a lot given that Vern lives here” The treacherous buzzing eased off when Leo took a second to unscrew the bottle of seltzer water. You took the opportunity to breath but just as he took a sip, he was back to swiping his finger. “May I remind you that you bought it and you told me to do this, I really don’t see how I’m the bad guy here” He left the phone on the small counter space, another brief reprieve.

“But if I’m the biggest asshole here, I guess I should live up to the title” He smiled, he honest to god gave you that typical sweet boy smile.

Before proceeding to basically DJ his phone screen with an index finger.

You pressed your face to his arm and prayed to god that, welll, just, fuck!

“Leonardo I can’t have an orgasm in public!” Your words were muffled by the skin of his arm, regardless the party was on full blast. There was a delicious thrill at the idea of it though, as Leo wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you close to him, you could make out just how much he had been enjoying this game.

He kissed your temple, nothing salacious about it, just a sweet peck.

Then his mouth fell closer to your ear.

"I don't give two shits that we're in public and people are watching."

Your eyes went wide, the intensity of the toy being put on full blast and Leo twitching his finger on the screen without any intention of letting up.

He hugged you closer to him, smiling against your temple as your grip became iron tight on his clothes. As the music got heavier and the chatter picked up, you did all you could do to muffle your moans of pleasure against Leo’s plastron, thankfully using the same thing to hide your face.

Because your eyes were rolling back and Leo didn’t seem to have any intention of slowing down. Even when Raph’s gaze landed on the pair, Leo just mouthed ‘cramps’ at him with a sad expression, the large brute made a sympathetic look before returning to his own on going conversation.

Only when he felt you start to tremble, incoherent babbling he could only make out to be begging, did Leo ease up to a soft rumble that only served to shock you from time to time. When you felt like your vision returned, you looked up at him all red faced and shakey breathing.

Leo petted your hair, smirking down at your slightly disheveled state. Surely this was going to be his favorite toy, even if it was currently back firing on him. He was hideously turned on and your warm body against him only served to make things worse for him.

But naturally you wanted some payback, since he had been a wonderful, delightful and merciless asshole.

“Sensei, please?” You whispered up at him, all pouty lips and innocent eyed. Inside you were grinning victoriously when he grunted and held you tighter.

Even when his eyes landed on the bathroom, you knew the real winner had been you.

[imherebabycakes]

SHEABUTTABABY🍯🍫 pt3

donnie\femreader tmntbayverse 14/16 the guys are 20+

*i do not own anything tmnt*

i didn’t proof read a damn thing😂(sorry)

my oc’s name is Blaze,Neptune Marie

24

military veteran

a black woman from the south side of washington dc

she’s 5’5

has light grey eyes

black wavy hair *bra length*

lets just say she’s the type of woman you’d see in king magazine. she fire 🔥

loves trap, the 90’s hip hop r&b as well as Jamaican country

chill & laid back, can twerk also

……………

so there we stood, the purple masked terrapin & myself , blushing at one another looking dumb as hell

ehemm…..are you to okay? raph say’s staring at me & his brother with a sly grin on his face.

umm yea…..yea im straight, i say almost instantly snapping out of a trance, and perking up as if i wasn’t just imagining donnie kissing me all over.

donnie! you good? mikey asks

oh yea mikey im…uh never better donnie answered. obviously lying through his gap teeth.

i peep the scene and its hella awkward and stuffy even if being outside.

well guys, umm it was nice to meet y’all but i better get home,im jhi tired…

jhi? what does that mean? mikey asks with a slight giggle.

well in dc its slang & we use it to emphasize a few things but in this case it just took the place of the word really.

ohhhh wow thats so cool, i love dc slang its different

im glad you do mikey,

but guys i do have to get gone. i got work in the morning unfortunately. as i got my stuff in the car i pop back out an ask , umm do you guys wanna link up again or is this just a one time thing?

well idk, will you tell people of our existence? asked leo hoping right in face , a little to close but i guess this was his attempt at coming off threatening . which wasn’t working at all

i chuckle to myself as i slide a little to the left to get some space between us,

“nah man i wont tell a soul” thats my word.

he looks me over and huffs “yea well see”,

almost immediately they ascend back to the roof tops disappearing into the night. 

see later sexy chocolate!!! mikey yelled

shut up mikey !! the rest

them yell in unison.

………….time jump…..2weeks later

it was now friday 5:30pm finally free from the plantation i call work. while walking to my car i thought about a few things, like i loved my job as an SPO, working at Children’s hospital  but my real passion is fashion design and today my sergeant caught me drawing a few sketches while on duty and grilled me for it.

she can kiss my black ass and i mean it , i cant stand that old bitch it wasn’t even that serious to be honest .

walking out of the elevator and into garage towards my car all i could think about were those four unique brothers out of my head, Especially the tall one in purple.

now that i think about it i didn’t even get his number, shit i been out the game for a while , but its cool i’ll see them again one of these days….. right?

i sigh and push all those thoughts to the back of my mind. i threw my sketch books and gear in the car and drove off.

about 25 minutes later i sluggishly enter my cold apartment kick my shoes off,lock the door then proceed to my bedroom. i plopped down my lush king sized bed, looking at the ceiling lost in my thoughts of the full day i had and the next thing i knew i fell asleep.

i woke up around 10pm realizing i had fell asleep in my clothes, i reluctantly made my way to the bathroom where i ran the shower to get it nice and hot to my liking, while stepping in the air/steam relaxed me even more, damn this feels good, i needed this….

donnie pov

its been almost 2 1/2 weeks since we’ve seen blaze.

patrols have been the usual not alot of foot clan activity a few attempted muggings but nothing has really changed.

but i noticed that i couldn’t concentrate on any of my work since i seen that Beautiful woman.

i couldn’t get her out of my head, i mean i’ve been with other women before, yea they were mostly in the police department but still. hell i’ve even had a girlfriend once upon a time.

it was something special about blaze, and i honestly think its because she a black woman.

to be honest i i’ve always been with a white woman or latin or asian and i don’t know much about black women or culture for that matter outside of rap & r&b music that i listen to.

or what the media sometimes portrays but im not one to judge and everything is not what it seems so i don’t stereotype people. i mean i wouldn’t have room to judge anyways im a mutant turtle for crying out loud. i sigh slumping in my chair, i don’t know what to do.

you should go see her bro,im sure she’d be happy to see you again, she seems cool even though i didn’t think you’d go for her type say’s mikey

umm……mikey first off how long have you been standing there listening to me? and secondly whats my type?

long enough to know you got the hots for blaze…..look bro she likes you man.

i saw the way y’all looked at each other. she fine as hell but you know usually go for white skinny girls like april.

you know the runway “model type”. & blaze is the opposite she’s got body oddy oddy for days he said laughing.

you cant handle all that wagon she’s draggin ,but you better get on that and wife her up before i do… he says slyly.

oh please mikey she doesn’t want you , your to immature for a woman like that and plus her having a curvy body doesn’t matter to me in fact that’s actually what i like about her

yea ok Donnie, im not the one who needs convincing , you’ve fucked only skinny white, latin,or asian woman only . you sure blaze isn’t just some fetish for you bro?

what!! of course not mikey i’ve only fucked those other women because thats all thats around us, people usually date who’s in close proximity to them you idiot. if more curvier women lived around here black woman included then maybe i would date them.

umm bro sorry to burst your bubble big bro but the thing is, black woman mostly definitely are around, and there’s alot that work in the police department to . open your eyes dude and admit you have a type he says laughing and walking away

damn he got me stumped… i…i guess i do, well did have a type but obviously not anymore. i gotta see Blaze again.

turning to my computers i figure its time for some hacking and background checking.

(blazes pov)

…..

after that lovely shower and hot meal, i decided to sit on my balcony with some wine to look out onto the city. as im sitting there, i think about my life and whats ahead,like how i love fashion and design, and my dream is to be big time designer. but how will i get there.

just as I’m pouring another cup of wine my phone starts vibrate uncontrollably then all of a sudden a greenish hologram of green bean Donatello pops up

“hey there, its ummm Donatello you know the turtle guy!?….anyways umm well i hope im not interrupting anything. i’m a bit of a computer whiz & nerd hence me hacking in your phone .  I just wanted to say that you seem cool and I would like to meet up again sometime if that’s OK with you?

that’ll be great donnie i don…..

THIS IS A RECORDED MESSAGE !

HIT 1 FOR YES OR 2 FOR NO!

THIS IS A RECORDED MESSAGE !

HIT 1 FOR YES OR 2 FOR NO!

all right all right!. sheesh give me a second , feeling a bit stupid because i thought it was a live conversation . (hits 1) “you’ve chosen number 1, please stand by for follow up text.” then like turning off a tv the hologram of him shut off

!Bing Bing Ding!

damn that was fast as shit donnie, you really wanna see my sexy ass huh i joke. i open my phone and the text read

hey blaze this is donnie again, im glad you said yes, if you can, please meet me at the same spot where we met at 7:30 pm 2 blocks away from the double take on saturday. well im looking forward to seeing you😂😅

i chuckle to myself at the thought of he’s such a nerd, but a fine ass one, and i’ve honestly been thinking about this for weeks now. not knowing what he wants to meet up for specifically i don’t know what to put on. I want to look good but I also don’t wanna overdo it. aw who am i kidding i look good naked, he’ll like me in whatever. plopping on my bed i drift off to sleep with the wonders of whats to come tomorrow.

mmmmm…. donnie!

(Donnie pov)

yes yes and hell yes!!! i screaming and squealing while fist pumping in my lab chair,

whoa i say getting overwhelmed i have a date, well not a date date. but we’re meeting up! got damnit its a date thats unofficially officially a date! 

omg omg omg this is amazing…

wheeeew,wheeeeeeew….calm down donnie this is not your first date, relax buddy i say to myself. its honestly not my first date but with a girl like her it might as well be. I wonder what we will have to talk about she’s so much different than girls ive dated before, down to her her body ,skin tone ,her lingo and where she’s from. sitting down on my bed, i sigh and lay back with only one thing on my mind, in the words of Tpain

IM SPRUNG!!!!

…time jump 3pm next day…..

( blaze pov)

I don’t know why I’m so nervous this man has me sweating like a hooker in church, not wanting to do too much I just do what drake said. put my hair tied up and chill with no make up on. and if he really fucks with me like he says then he’ll see that I’m beautiful naturally. but in the meantime all this planning gotcha girl hungry I think a quick meal will suffice nothing too heavy though, probably like a BLT with some chips because i don’t want the bubble guts on the first meet up.

time jump 7:28pm saturday night

(donnie pov)

hopping on the roof, i stare at the city below me, i got here with 3 minutes to spare. blaze should be here any minute now. well i might as well sit and wait and sing.

(start singing his version of ushers “nice N slow” )

its seven o clock on the dot im on the root top, looking at the city,….i’ve got a real pretty pretty black queen that im waiting to see, when she pulls up, ill be anticipating, her good looks, damn she’s amazing, i got plans to my hands on her waist,looking up to see if she’s really feeling me!! let me take you to the park where its quiet, there ain’t no one there to attack us, i can feel the rush, cuz i just wanna get to know you more…… blaze tell me what you wanna do

(blaze pov)

pulling up to the same spot i almost got robbed at made me uneasy, but since donnie was meeting me here i knew i was okay. i do one last look in my rearview mirror to look at my hair and face. and like i said earlier, I kept it chill and i put on my favorite black juicy sweatsuit & my black & white Jordan 12’s and my hair was in a messy bun. and i couldn’t forget my mouskatool. getting out the car i start to text donnie to let him know im here, when i hear singing and beautiful singing at that, i slightly walk into the alley where i hear the melody an look up to see my green bean singing what sounded like ushers nice and slow song

i didn’t want to startle him so i let him continue, & what i heard next made a shiver go down my spine, not only could he sing well but if im not mistaken he’s singing about… well me!! at least i hope he is. unless its about another black queen. not wanting to waste any more time I shoot him a text.

you sound amazing!….and am i a queen to you? 

(donnie pov)

hearing my phone go off I figure blaze is on her way but to my horror i see,

 **you sound amazing!….and am i a queen to you?**

which means not only was she here but she’s been here and not only has she been here she heard me singing and not just singing but singing about her. naturally my heart went to my ass and i felt my stomach tighten immediately. im so embarrassed. then i hear blaze say

**YO Rapunzel let down your hair! she says laughing. c’mon down here song bird or should i come up there?**

ummmm no ill come and get you give me a sec. i flip down and see blaze staring at me smiling at me with those beautiful grey eyes and she has cute button nose. wait when did she get a nose piercing? has that always been there?. man does she look stunning , i mean she’s effortlessly beautiful, her hair was in a messy bun and she had a simple but cute track suit on that hugged that body of her’s sheesh. baby got baaayyyack . snapping out of it i realize she’s leaning in for a hug, OH SHIT HUG HER YOU IDIOT*

hugging donnie i say, damn i didn’t know you had pipes like that green bean, you sound amazing. you remind me of a 90’s r&b singer,i love that. noticing he’s in a daze i snapped twice in his face, hello earth to Donnie are you there? “oh my bad blaze, sorry i got distracted. can you repeat what y said please?

shaking my head laughing i repeat myself. donnie i said your singing is amazing man. and what did you get distracted from that fast?

honestly blaze….. well..i got distracted by…umm… y-your beau…hmp…. I GOT DISTRACTED BY HOW BEAUTIFUL YOU ARE!!

going wide eyed by his raised voice and words , i just give a sly smile and say. like wise