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obsessedelusional · 2 years

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Your Pretend Boyfriend

paring ✦ Eddie Munson x Reader

summary ✦ Eddie was your pretend boyfriend. Your mutual dislike for Jason Carver brought you together. You met during Thanksgiving break and had to separate to go back to college. Christmas break could not come fast enough. CONTAINS SMUT

word count ✦ 3,144

authors note ✦ absolutely baffled by the sheer amount of love y’all have given me since my last post I’m almost to 600 followers and have over 10,000 notes, thank you so much (((I didn’t mean to leave part one on a cliff hanger tumblr just loves to cut my text short and won’t let me fix it)))

MASTERLIST ✦ PART ONE

FEEDBACK AND REBLOGS APPRECIATED!!! If you like this let me know if I should keep it going, I got some ideas...

⊹ ꙳ ✦ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹

“You’re so dramatic.” Your dorm mate, Tiffany laughs.

“And what about it?” You ask, tears brimming your eyelids.

“Christmas break is three weeks away. You only have to make it three weeks till you can see him again.” She sighs, pulling you in for a brief hug.

“You two met two weeks ago and now you’re crying after being separated for less than twenty four hours? Is he like Jesus himself reincarnated or something? What did he do to you?” She laughs, pulling away from your embrace. Your brain immediately races thinking of all the lovable qualities about Eddie. Remembering the last time you were with him. Where you confronted him about your relationship status only for him to tell you everything you had hoped he’d say. Eddie is your boyfriend. Long distance boyfriend.

“He’s just so-“ She cuts you off.

“He must have like a massive dick. Be amazing in bed or something.” She says, you can’t help but grin at her comment. Your smile through the tears tells her all she needs to know.

“Oh my god. You’re addicted to what the dick did, huh?” She laughs.

“Okay maybe I am. Is that a crime?” You groan, pulling your sleeves past your fingers and wiping away the tears.

“No I just ain’t ever seen you like this. The two years I’ve been your roomie not once have you even brought a guy around, let alone cry over one. It’s cute.” She says, her tone teasing.

“Whatever.” You stand up making your way to the bathroom.

“This is not the end of our conversation. You will be telling me everything.” She hollers at you as you slip into the bathroom, smiling at her comment.

You slip your jeans down your legs, letting them rest at your ankles as you sit on the toilet. After doing your business you go to wipe, only to find blood. It all making sense now why you’ve been so emotional. You laugh to yourself, thanking whoever is listening that you’re not pregnant. Not that you thought that was an even an possibility. The second time you and Eddie slept together, you told him to not wear a condom. Wanting to feel him raw, feel him fill you up with his warmth. Needing nothing more than to feel him spilling his release inside you. Putting all your faith in that little white pill you take once a day.

—

“Let me guess, Eddie?” Tiffany teases and she walks into the dorm to find you on your phone, face timing someone.

“Yeah,” You smile momentarily taking your attention away from your phone.

“Listen Eddie the quicker you let her clean the dorm with me so we can pass inspection the sooner she can come home to you. Okay?” She interrupts shoving her face in the face time call.

“Okay.” Eddie sighs dramatically, “Let me know when you leave. Drive safe, princess.”

“Will do.” You say, the cheesiest grin on your face. He had realized quickly what that pet name did for you. So he used it the most amongst the others.

“Y’all are gonna make me sick.” Tiffany says, pretending to throw up causing you to roll your eyes.

“Bye Eds,” You sneak a smooch face when she’s not looking before hanging up.

“Can we get this over with?” She ask, passing you the coffee she brought you.

“I guess so.” You stand up from your bed to begin prepping the dorm room for winter break, you get a whole month in Hawkins. You take a sip from the sweet drink as she turns on some music. As you tidy up and pack your belongings away, you can’t help but think about the last three weeks.

When you weren’t in class or working your part time job, more often than not you were on the phone with Eddie. Staying up late in your car not to disturb Tiffany. The sexual aspect of your relationship never slowed. Constantly sending each other explicit messages usually accompanied by nude photos. Eddie would save any photo you’d send his way, he could never get enough. Having to decide what he’d delete on his phone so he could save more photos of you.

You try hard not to think of them time when Tiffany was suppose to be at her boyfriends apartment. So you set up your laptop, giving Eddie the best view of your body. Legs spread perfectly so he could see your wet cunt as you rub circles on your clit. His camera faced toward his cock where he was desperately tugging on it. The sound of the dorm door being opened and lights turned on caused you to scream, slamming the laptop shut hurrying to cover your naked body.

Tiffany screamed too covering her eyes, “Jesus Christ can you warn me next time your gonna do that? Put a sock on the door or something.” He tone mostly teasing you.

You mutter out an sorry before grabbing your clothes and going to the bathroom. As soon as your in there you hear her laughter fill the dorm room. Takes you some time but eventually you find the courage to leave the bathroom. Tiffany looks up from what she was doing, a understanding smile on her lips.

“I’m not upset or anything. Actually kind of amused by the entire situation, that your so horned up you felt the need to do that. Can’t judge though if I lived farther from my man I’d be doing the same.” She let’s out a soft chuckle.

“Speaking of your man, weren’t you supposed to be at his?” You asked completely disregarding the rest of her words.

“Unfortunately for you, he got called into work girly.” She laughs, you sink into your bed absolutely mortified.

“Come girl you know damn well I’ll never let you forget that?”

“I know.” You groaned.

And she didn’t. Every time she came into the dorm room she’d knock obnoxiously loud, only to enter with her eyes covered. Asking if it was safe to enter or if you had all your clothes on.

—

It had taken much longer to prep your dorm room for winter break than you thought it would. Once you were finally done, your car packed with a suitcase filled with more than enough clothing to last you well over a month. You said your goodbyes to Tiffany and made the dreadful car ride home. Only this time it wasn't so dreadful, for once you had something to look forward to, Eddie.

The plan was to drive straight to Eddie's house. Your parents weren’t expecting you till Monday so you had all weekend uninterrupted with Eddie. The first hour or so of the drive was spent on the phone with him, only hanging up because service was spotty until you got closer to Hawkins.

With the shit service and nearly dead battery you didn't bother checking it again. The sun was just beginning to set when you arrived to Eddie's trailer, parking right in front. Wasting no time, you take your phone and keys up to his front door, knocking eagerly. Your excitement grows as you watch the door handle rattle as he opens it.

Your greeted by Eddie, he looks just as happy as you are in this moment. You step forward wrapping you arms around his waist, taking a moment to breathe in his smell. He follows your lead, hands wrapping around you. Before he can speak you reach to his level, fingers finding his hair. They always end up in his hair. You cut him off by kissing him deeply, for a moment he drops into the kiss only to pull away. Your face contorts to a pout upset at the loss of contact.

The sound of someone else clearing their throat alerts you to their presence. It’s Wayne, Eddie’s uncle, the man you’ve heard so many stories about. Eddie’s only family whom you’ve never met before. His first impression of you was you throwing your self at his nephew.

Eddie’s face is apologetic as you smile at Wayne and introduce yourself, his face flat with no emotion.

“Nice to meet the one that’s been occupying all my nephews time.” He teases, finally smiling putting your anxieties temporarily at ease.

“Figured you’d be hungry after a long drive. Made dinner and thought we could all have dinner together.” Wayne admits, walking into the kitchen out of view.

“Ain’t nothing fancy just made some spaghetti.” Wayne says from the other room.

“I’m starving, sounds delicious.” You respond before zeroing on Eddie.

“Could of used a warning. The first time I ever meet your uncle and I was too busy climbing you like a tree to notice he’s here.” You say in a whisper, in hopes that Wayne can’t here.

“I messaged you and tired to call you. I’m sorry.” He replies. You unlock your phone and immediately all the notifications start coming in, too late.

“It’s fine.” You smile, sneaking one more kiss before joining Wayne at the kitchen table.

—

“So you’re in college right? What you going to school for?” Wayne asks, shoving his face with another fork full. You begin explaining why your in school and what your majoring in.

“Damn Eddie how’d you land this one? She’s smart and you’re... not.” He laughs, he’s the only one laughing. You look to Eddie who looks like he's use to these type of comments.

“Eddie’s smart in his own ways.” You respond, more than ready to stand up for Eddie.

“How so?” Wayne scoffs.

“Have you ever seen him perform? He’s so talented. He totally has stage presence when he’s up there performing. I could never do that.” Eddie smiles at your kind words.

“Or have you ever sat in on one of his campaigns? He’s so creative, a natural born story teller. Half the time I don’t even understand what they’re doing, way beyond my comprehension.” You add, watching as Wayne pays no attention to you.

“That shits never gonna make him any money. Let’s be real.” Wayne laughs, food spilling out of his mouth.

“I could totally see Eddie being a bad ass rock star. Have you heard their music? I feel like they just need to create a brand for themselves and start promoting their music. Corroded Coffin could totally make it.” You snap, feeling yourself getting worked up. Eddie only ever talked about Wayne in such a positive light. So to hear Wayne shit on him so easily was very upsetting. Seeing Eddie’s reaction only further upsetting you.

“Has he told you about he’s on his second senior year?” Wayne asks, dismissing everything you said.

“Yeah I know that. Schools not for everyone.”

“Not for Eddie.” Wayne laughs harder then he laughed before. At this point you don’t respond too sacred if you say something, it’ll be something you regret. The rest of dinner is filled with silence. Wayne gets up and leaves without saying a word, he’s left the two of you alone in the trailer.

“You okay?” You ask, Eddie’s slumped over his place.

“Yeah.” He doesn’t sound okay.

“He’s kind of a dick.” You admit, Eddie cracks a smile.

“He’s just concerned about me. He took me in at such a young age and now I continue to be a failure for him.” He sighs, getting up and grabbing the plates from the table and bringing them to the sink. He begins washing them leaving you sat at the table. You stand up and hug him from behind, resting your head on his shoulder blade.

“You’re not a failure.” You murmur, against his back.

“How’d I get so lucky to have you in my life?” He asks, still working on the dishes. Eddie was always asking you questions like this one. As if he didn’t feel adequate enough to be with you. Which was entirely the opposite of what you believed.

“By not being a failure.” Eddie chuckles finally, you can feel him relax and a smile return to his lips.

“And by being so so so so sweet and uhhh sexy.” You tease, he shuts the water off to face you.

“Sexy?” He says with an perplexed smile.

“Mhmm,” You purr. Eddie cups your ass before kissing you tenderly, pulling you closer. His lips travel down your throat causing you to whimper under his touch.

“What about your uncle?” You ask barely audible as you squirm under his touch, his hands slipping under your shirt.

“He went to work. He’ll be gone all night.” That’s all you needed to hear, you had been waiting for this moment for weeks. Dreaming of this moment, when you’d finally get to be alone with Eddie.

You pull away only to lead him to his bedroom, shutting the door behind him. He pushes your body into the bed, climbing on top of you. Kissing you for a brief moment before pulling your shirt off revealing your chest. He places a soft kiss on your nipple before enveloping in his mouth. A small moan leaves you lips as your hips buck upwards. Eddie pushes you down, only to release your nipple from his mouth. His pulls you jeans down, to reveal the sexy underwear you wore specifically for this occasion.

“For me?” He growls, you nod yes. He reaches to remove them. A swift push of his hands has him confused.

“I want to make you feel so good. As good as you make me feel every day, okay?”

He nods yes as you instruct him to take his pants off, he stands up to do so only for you to follow before getting on your knees, fully on display for his viewing pleasure. You’re face to face with the tent in his boxer, you grasp his hard on though the thin fabric. Pumping it a few times, watching as his face contorts with pleasure. You let go only to slips his boxers down, letting them fall to his ankles. His dick sits straight up for you.

“I’ve missed you.” You say, out loud accidentally.

“Are you talking to my-?” He’s shut up by your lips kissing his tip in an attempt to distract him from the fact that you were fully talking to his cock. Your mouth parts around the length of his shaft. Slowly at first letting your throat stretch until his tip reaches the back of your throat. One hand reaches for his balls, playing with them. You let his cock leave your mouth for a moment before sucking on it again, only this time faster. Hollowing your cheeks as you take him deeper into your throat.

You look up through your lashes only to make eye contact with him. The sight before you makes the pool between your legs grow. His hands tangle into your hair, forcing your head into him. Your nose rests in his pubes as you choke on his cock. He lets go and watches as you let you go, drool webs from his cock to your lips. You wipe it away, only to use the spit to pump his cock a few times. Your lips part once again, taking his full length in. He forces your head into him again, this time your eyes start to water.

“Fuck your taking me so good.” He says, bucking his hips into your mouth. Fucking your mouth. Your a mess, tears and spit dripping down your chin landing on your chest. He pulls away momentarily, only to admire the site in front of him. The mess he’s made of you. He taps his tip on your cheek causing you to smile before he’s parting your lips once more, letting his cock hit the back of your throat a few more times.

“How do you want me? Huh?” He asks, your unable to answer your mouth still full. He pulls out so you can answer, knowing if he doesn’t change up the position he’s gonna finish quicker then he’d like. Knowing he needs to feel your insides before that happens.

“I want to be on top.” You say, barley audible. He helps you stand up, kissing you roughly before laying down. You waste no time crawling up his body, eventually aligning your entrance with his cock. The wetness from your pussy and the saliva that coats his cock mixes as you bottom out on his cock. The most pornagrapic moan leaves your mouth as he stretches your cunt. It’s a mixture of pain and pleasure, having to get used to his size again after weeks of only using your hands.

“It’s like your pussy was made for me, so fucking perfect.” He groans as you finally start to move. You begin by grinding on his cock. Rolling your hips setting a rhythmic pace. Eddie’s large hands rest on your hips pushing you further down on his cock. You fall to his level, kissing his lips once again never stopping the motion of your hips.

His arms wrap around you so he can thrust into you from under you, harder than what you we’re currently doing causing you to cry out in pleasure. Your head falls between next to his as he fucks you.

“I need more. I need you on top.” You whimper, knowing that when Eddie’s on top he can truly fuck you at his best. He doesn’t argue, rolling over so your under him. His kisses you as he lets the tip of his cock, slip between your folds. Your moaning turns into a cry as he enters your cunt, his lips still kissing you as the sounds leave your mouth.

He picks up his pace, thrusting his hips in a steady motion. Your fingers reach for your clit, running circles around it. Knowing that’s the little push you need to come undone while wrapped around Eddie’s cock. Your walls start fluttering around his cock, your gut tightens. Your vision blurs as your pushed over the edge, your nails dig into Eddie’s back probably leaving marks.

“Good girl.” He grunts, continuing his brutal pace. He gives you one last powerful thrust before flooding you with his cum. You pull his head down to your level, kissing him frenziedly. Letting his tired cock rest in your cunt, keeping it warm. You can’t help but frown when he eventually pulls away from your embrace, leaving you feeling empty. He rolls over next you, you cuddle up closer to him. Listening to his heart beat so fast. You two lay there in silence for a few minutes before he breaks the silence.

“Are we just going to gloss over the fact that your were totally talking to my dick? Telling him how much you missed him?” He laughs tiredly, voice cracking as he teases you.

“I missed both of you.” You say with a roll of your eyes.

TAG LIST: @nika-sophie05 @comboboo @tlclick73 @anaisweird @soulesstravlers @resident-gay-bitch

#eddie munson #eddie imagine #eddie x reader #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson smut #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson pov #eddie stranger things #stranger things season 4 #stranger things 4 #stranger things #stranger things x reader #stranger things smut #munson #wayne munson #eddie the freak munson #stranger things eddie #smut #modern au

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likecastle · 2 years

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Ronance Femslash February - “do you really have to go?”

Thank you so much to the lovely anon who sent in the prompt “do you really have to go?” I’m so delighted that some of you have sent prompts my way! Please keep them coming! (Anon asks are totally fine! You’re welcome to send more than one, if you want! And, for the record, I’m pretty open about subject matter. If a prompt isn’t something that works for me I may give it a miss, but chances are I won’t be offended. Don’t be shy!) You can find previous prompts I’ve filled here.

“Do you really have to go?” Nancy murmurs into Robin’s hair, and all at once, for the first time in a long time, she’s reminded of the day she stood in Jonathan’s empty bedroom, wishing he could camp out in her parents’ basement. She’s always felt that the Byers family moving to California was the beginning of the end for her and Jonathan, though it took a long time to recognize what should have been obvious to both of them. If she’s being honest with herself, which she tries to do these days, the fault lines were there long before Jonathan left—in her insistence that he always put her first, in the idea he had of her that reality could never quite live up to, in all the things they couldn’t say to one another—but even though she knows it’s more complicated than that, some part of her still believes the distance was to blame for the rift that grew up between them.

It worried her, when she and Robin decided to give the thing that was blossoming between them a shot. Nancy worried that their relationship would never have a fighting chance if they only saw each other once every couple of months, if they only talked over the phone. Some part of her is still worried, every time Robin gets on the bus heading back to Bloomington, every time she glances at Robin waving goodbye in her rear-view mirror. Because the thing is, she really wants this to work—even more than she realized when she first kissed Robin over Thanksgiving break of their sophomore year. She wants to make a life with Robin, and she doesn’t want to fall prey to the same mistakes she’s made before.

“Don’t tell me you fell asleep on me,” Robin is saying, and Nancy realizes that she’s been talking this whole time. Robin prods Nancy in the ribs—gently, but her elbows are perilously sharp. “I’m over here whispering sweet nothings to you on our last night together until winter break, and you’re catching up on your beauty sleep? Seriously, Wheeler?”

Nancy groans, and pulls Robin closer against her chest, as much to forestall any further attempted elbowing as to bask in the scent of Robin’s skin, sweat and the ghost of incense and her herbal shampoo. “I wasn’t asleep,” she says against the knob of Robin’s spine. “Just thinking.”

Robin nestles closer, a luxurious cat-like stretch against her. “Oh, yeah?” she asks, and her voice is still teasing, but soft, so very soft. “What about?”

“You,” Nancy admits. She’s tempted to say something provocative, to distract Robin by sliding her hands from her waist down to her hips, but she doesn’t let herself. “D’you ever wish one of us had changed our plans? That I’d transferred to IU, maybe? Or taken some time off to figure things out together?”

She can feel the change in Robin’s body, the way the languid ease disperses from her limbs. “Honestly?” she asks, sounding serious.

This is what Nancy gets for asking, she tells herself. It might not be an answer she likes, but that’s the risk of being honest with each other, of trying, at least, to really talk to each other. “Always.”

“I like how things are right now.” She feels one of Robin’s hands settle over hers, her thumb rubbing slow circles across the backs of her knuckles. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, I am very much looking forward to living together some day, and sleeping in the same bed with you every night and having, like, so many arguments about whose turn it is to do the laundry or whatever. But we’re good like this. I’m glad we both have the space to be stupid college students, and I also I love getting letters from you that I have to wait to read until I’m alone. You’re a really good writer, by the way, have I ever mentioned that?”

“Maybe once or twice,” Nancy says, smothering her smile against Robin’s skin.

“I guess what I’m saying is, I like that we can be apart, but no matter where we go, or how long we go without seeing each other, I always want to come back to you.” Robin lifts one of Nancy’s hands to her lips and kisses it gently. “OK?”

“OK,” Nancy whispers, blinking against the sudden sting in the corners of her eyes. And that’s enough, Nancy decides—more than enough.

#ronance #robin x nancy #robin/nancy #robin buckley #nancy wheeler #ronance femslash february #should i be putting these behind a cut?#they're not all that long so i figured it's ok but please let me know if it's annoying #i had so much fun with this one #please keep the prompt coming #i love prompts so much you all are a delight

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galactic-magick · 2 years

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Very Funny: Odo x Reader

Summary: Odo doesn’t believe that you like him.

Words: 400+

Author’s Notes: There are not enough Odo fics so I am here to help. Goo man make brain go brrrr

All your friends aboard the station have been nagging you about it for months, so you’re finally going to do it.

You’re going to tell Odo you like him.

You have no idea how or what exactly to say, but you’ve been putting it off for way too long. You’ve been friends with Odo ever since you came aboard the station. He makes you laugh even if he doesn’t always mean to, he makes you feel safe, and deep down he’s incredibly kind underneath the tough exterior. He intrigues you even after over a year of knowing him, and you’d love nothing more than to keep getting to know him.

You decide to talk to him during the time of day he’s usually free, and you find him sitting in his office triple-checking security records.

“Ah, Y/N, what brings you by today?” he asks when he sees you in the doorway, just briefly looking up from his screen.

“I was actually wondering if you have a minute to talk?”

“Of course,” he replies, putting his full attention back to you.

“Okay. Well…” you take a deep breath. “I just need to tell you something. I’ve been hiding it for a while but I think it’s about time you knew,”

He squints at you, “What is this about Y/N?”

“It’s about you, Odo,” a slight smile breaks through the anxiety on your face. “I really like you. As a friend but also more. So I wanted to ask you on a date. If you’re interested, that is,”

You await his response, but he doesn’t say anything.

Finally, he lets out a gruff laugh.

“Very funny,” he says.

Your brows furrow in confusion, “What do you mean?”

“Who put you up to this? Quark?”

“What are you talking about?”

“You can drop the act, Y/N. No one is seriously romantically attracted to someone like me. If you’re going to play jokes on me you should’ve done something more realistic,” he gestures for you to leave.

“This isn’t a joke, Odo! I’m your friend, why would I do something that mean to you?”

“I don’t know!”

You groan. This is not how you thought this was going to go.

“Odo,” you grab his hand gently. “What do I have to do for you to believe me?”

He looks at your hand, then at you, then back to your hand.

His gaze finally softens, “I suppose this is not a joke, then?”

“No, it’s not,” you smile. “I really do like you, Odo,”

“I’ve...never been on a date before,” he admits. “I don’t exactly know what to do,”

“Don’t worry, it’s not hard,” you grip his hand a little tighter. “We can do whatever we want.”

Requests Status: I am currently not taking requests right now because finals are coming up for me, I’m just writing a couple short fics while I’m on Thanksgiving break. Once my semester is done and I’m on winter break I’ll probably start taking Star Trek requests though! Stay tuned :)

#odo x reader #deep space nine x reader #odo #constable odo #ds9 #deep space nine #star trek #ds9 x reader #star trek x reader

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nidailylife · 2 years

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So is the pandemic over? Because i was under the impression that it is not.

Just a few minutes ago, i went into the kitchen for 1 last bite to eat before ending my all nighter, and suddenly my mom says "we're going to our extended family's house for Thanksgiving." The same family house, where the last time everyone got together for Xmas2021, a lot of them came away with Covid. I told my mom this was a bad idea, the pandemic is still going on, i didnt yet get the new variant booster yet, i heard cases were expected to rise this winter, etc. So I'm not going. Thankfully, she allowed it. But I'm so afraid of confrontation, especially against my parents, that there's nothing i can really do to stop her from doing whatever she wants. And she's already cooking for the potluck, so she seems pretty locked into attending.

I know i gave into some things recently that might give the impression that i may think, just as much as my mom does, that the pandemic is over. 2 months ago, i went to 2 funerals with my family. But that was mandatory, serious stuff! It wasnt a party for fun snd socializing, which would be the unnecessary frivolity that i consider a family holiday party to be. Then we gave out Halloween candy last month. I was still really iffy about handing out physical objects to kids during this continuing pandemic. But a cousin convinced me it was safe, because most people are vaccinated.

Well, my dad is not vaccinated! At all! He says he has a medical history of bad reactions to vaccinations, therefore he needs written authorization from his doctor before he could get the Covid vaccine, that his doctor never gave it, and he's not exactly eager to follow up for when that might change. Last time i talked to him about the vaccines, he was starting to sound a little like an antivaxxer. Yeek. I say this, because even if i get all vacvinated and feel safe for my own health, I'm always afraid of going outside, and bringing Covid back home to him. Even besides his vaccination status, he's already in two high risk groups: the elderly, and pre existing chronic illness (diabetes). And sure, despite all this, he still breaks quarantine pretty regularly to shauffer my mom and tag along to her social butterfly things, and he hasnt seemed to have caught Covid yet. But i cant go tempting his fate myself! It's 1 thing that i can't stop my parents from doing whatever they want to do. I've always been too paralyzed by confrontation, especially vs them. But it's another thing for me to exasperate their risks with my own actions. I dont want to do that!😭

On top of that, i was a germaphobe and socially anxious, even before the pandemic. And maybe i dont want to unnecessarily break quarantine for those reasons too. But even aside from the pandemic, there are problems with springing these sudden party plans on me, on the same day, with no prep. This morning was the first i heard of us going anywhere for Thanksgiving! No heads up, for me to fix my flipped sleep patterns, so I'd be awake enough to attend. No heads up for me to mentally prep, when she knows i have a lot of social anxiety. Not even a heads up in terms of just basic calendar planning! This is crazy.

Then add on top that she told me this morning that "it [the Covid pandemic] is over" ...and she wants to breaks quarantine, at a big gathering (since our extended family is numerous), that already has a recent history of infecting lots of our family with Covid...and all because she wants to socialize????? I know she's very social and extroverts go crazy without socialization. But she talks on the phone with her friends everyday! In extended calls! This is an unnecessary risk.

And I'm too tired from my all nighter to deal with this.

Maybe i can plant doubt into their minds about staying long at the party. Maybe i can convince my dad to just drop off my mom instead of him attending himself. I dunno... I'm tired.

#pandemic #venting

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sunlightwoo · 4 years

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Five Day Confessions

pairing: baseball player!eric x g.n reader

genre: college au, best friends to lovers trope with like some slow burn?? in a way??? but also they’re like lowkey pining over each other cause why not with your usual fluff, humor and angst

wc: 4.7k

plot: you think that it’s amusing to see the star baseball player of your school pining over your heart, seeing as though your winter break was coming around the corner. maybe it was the holiday season that was coming, or the unspoken feelings that you might’ve had for your flirtatious best friend that was clueless about your own thoughts to him. let’s hope that maybe these five days that you both confess to each other indirectly finally go unnoticed.

a/n: this lowkey ended up being the longest oneshot that i have written on this blog, and i’m really shocked HOUEHGOEA of course it’d be eric sohn.. bUT ANYWAYSS :)) i hope you enjoy this piece that i’ve been working on these days for @timextoxhajima‘s collab cause the pain i felt while writing this... yeah hehe anyways happy new yearrr

COLLAB MASTERLIST | MY TBZ MASTERLIST

Day One

It was five days before you were finally let out onto the winter break that you had been longing for since Thanksgiving weekend. An entire semester that was filled with endless assignments, stress and exams that definitely would’ve been the end of your existence, had it not been spent with your best friend along the way.

You were surprised that the star baseball player that was too close to your heart for your liking was passing, considering you never saw him come back to your shared apartment until the late hours of eight at night. Whether it was during the spring, or like now in the winter where he was conditioning for months before the season could even start, he was always focused on excelling in both baseball, but also securing a career in entrepreneurship if baseball happened to be a setback.

You argued the latter, that he was far too good to not be let into the major leagues, but he always found a way to downplay it and rather change the subject.

That was how Eric Sohn was, you concluded as you lived everyday being best friends with him.

The afternoon sun was already beaming down on you through the window as you sat at the seat closest to it in your last class of the day. Words that would’ve left your professor’s mouth sounded like complete gibberish as you were struggling to concentrate on whatever lesson he was trying to teach until you locked eyes with the said best friend, his eyes already scheming with mischief in them.

A smile crosses his lips as you watch him mouth something incoherent to you, making you distracted momentarily as you giggled to yourself quietly and shook your head. Turning away from the latter, the bell rings just in time for you to finally leave from your class as you hear the yells that were slowly growing louder come closer to your own ears.

“We’re free for the rest of the week!” He cheers as he tosses both yours and his bags over his shoulders, a habit that he picked up over the past few years even after you argued with him numerous times to not do so because of how bad you felt from the heaviness of your own bag combined with his sports gear.

That never seemed to stop him, however, since it was an everyday thing that he seemed to pick up to this day.

“Sounds like fun. Any plans for today?” You ask him curiously, walking out of the room together with him as the two of you were already heading out of the building to head back to your shared apartment, ready to start feeling the stress-free vacation that you needed for a while and for Christmas to arrive.

There was a beat of silence as you could tell that he was thinking about what to do for today, making you look at him momentarily and take in the tiny details that painted his face carefully. You knew that your best friend was handsome, there was no argument against that.

“Quit staring at me, I know you’re in love with me,” He chuckles slightly and you blink back to reality to see that he was already staring back at you, making heat rush up to your cheeks as you pulled away from his gaze to stare at the clear sky above you.

“There was just something on your face, that’s all stupid.” You retort, hoping that maybe he would’ve bought the excuse and it seems as though that he did as he lets another beat of silence pass by.

What was he thinking about?

“Hey, do you want to get some ramen?” He nudged you gently, making you look up at him with widened eyes as he broke you from your thoughts when you smiled in response, nodding as the two of you began to head towards the convenience store that was just down the street.

“Last one to get there has to pay.” You grin, already breaking out for a sprint as the latter decides that maybe giving you a five second head start wasn’t too bad, hiding the amused smile on his face from the fact that you were too cute when you were excited about the thought of ramen.

Up until he feels the emptiness of his back pocket, making him realize that you had stolen his wallet to buy your own stuff before he could even notice it.

“Oh shit wait- they have my wallet. Y/N, you can't just call that and then take my wallet!”

Luckily for you, he wanted to pay for your meal anyways just to keep the smile on your face aligned with the stars that always seemed to twinkle in your eyes.

Day Two

“Hey, are you busy?”

You turn your head to see Eric standing at your door frame, seeing that he seemed to be in distress as you paused the drama that was on your television for a moment. Patting the empty beside you on the bed, he immediately rushes over to where you sat in which he steals the opportunity to cuddle you in his arms as he wraps them around your waist tightly while laying on top of you.

A breath escapes your lips from his sudden weight and you shifted over so that you were no longer on one end of the bed but rather the middle, so that neither of you would fall off of the mattress as a result of his antics. This particular position was one that you were all too familiar with considering these cuddle sessions would only happen when one of you had problems to spill to the other, and you could only assume that in this situation, it was Eric that had something to say.

However, the only thing you were confused about was the reason as to why he was like this when there wasn’t anything that he has told you about these days, whether it was about relationships, baseball or even himself.

“Everything okay, bubs?” You mumbled quietly, staring at the blonde in question as his nickname that you gave him easily slipped past your lips when he let out a soft hum in response.

It wasn’t unusual for him to come into your room to talk about whatever was on his mind in which he found it comforting that he was able to confide in you for such things. He knew that if he told any of his friends, they might not be able to emphasize his emotions with him, which was why he was grateful that you were both best friends but also comfortable enough with one another where anything that was said would only be kept between the two of you and only you two.

A special thing that you two had.

“I think I’m overthinking things again.” He bluntly whispers and moves his head so that he is now looking out the window as your hands found their way to gently play with the soft strands that were tickling your stomach slightly.

It was silent as you continued to play with his hair as you listened to him talk about whatever was randomly on his mind, in which he talked about how he missed visiting his family since they weren’t around this time of year because they went on vacation assuming Eric was conditioning again this year not knowing he took time off to spend time with them.

It made you think about how you must’ve been the only other person that he could spend the upcoming holidays with, since you knew that your close mutual friends were also heading home as well to spend time with their families. However, your plan was to stay at the apartment alone since you didn’t have anything to look forward to until now.

“”I’ll make sure that you have the best Christmas ever, Eric, I swear,” You softly smiled, holding out your pinky down towards his face and you felt him hook his pinky around yours, sending the familiar sensations of warmth down your spine at your wordless promise, “That’s all that was on your mind?”

You wonder if this was what it must’ve been like to fall in love with someone, seeing as though your heart was still pounding in your chest at how close he was to you. His soft breathing on top of yours was making you feel warmer in your heart, and you could only hope that he didn’t feel how fast your heart was beating underneath his ear.

“I think I like someone too, but I don’t know what it’s like to fall in love with someone.” He says and you look at him in confusion just as he looks back at you in pure curiosity.

You didn’t think that he actually liked someone at the moment, considering he wasn’t really good at keeping secrets from you regardless of how hard that he tries. However, you could feel the slight sting of jealousy in your heart, paining you at the fact that he was indeed too out of your league, and also your best friend.

It was too risky, you knew, to even date your best friend and also the star baseball player of your university as everybody loved Eric. No matter how flirtatious or friendly he was towards everyone, it was all strictly platonic on your end.

“Falling in love with someone can be the most beautiful, but also the most painful feeling in the world, bubs. Have you ever felt like that with someone these days?” You reply and suddenly feel him get up from where he was lying on you, the emptiness from his warmth leaving your own making you frown invisibly, but you knew that there was something going on in his head.

He really did like someone else.

“I think so… Don’t worry about it, sweetheart, I’m not that serious about it, okay?” He chuckles while ruffling your hair slightly as you could feel the loud shatters in your heart resonate in your chest, and you could only smile as you hope that he never catches onto the feelings you buried in your heart.

“Have you ever felt like that though, Y/N? It’s like you’re the one who has been in a long relationship like that, but I don’t think I’ve ever heard you talk about one since freshman year?” Eric mumbles, slightly facing you as you let out a quietly chuckle, sitting up against your bed frame to stare between him and the golden sun that is slowly setting outside your window.

It’s a painful feeling because it’s you, You think to yourself as the thoughts of possibly confessing to him would be minimal because you knew that he was only being friendly as your best friend, and nothing more than that.

“Not everyone is worthy of my time and kindness, like you sometimes are buddy.” You smiled, feeling the bitter feeling of guilt crawl up the back of your throat as you swallowed the lump once again, hoping that these feelings for your best friend would possibly leave you alone.

Hopefully.

Day Three

You envied all the couples that were able to show off their relationships that they were in as you were at the mall with your close friends, Kevin and Hyunjae. The three of you were out buying Christmas gifts for your loved ones and friends and you were in distress considering you haven’t bought anything for Eric yet that would count as both a birthday and a Christmas gift.

It would’ve been harder if he had tagged along like he originally planned on doing so, until he got a text from his coach for conditioning this afternoon after school. You were grateful for the fact that you didn’t really have to worry about hiding what his gift was in plain sight, however you decided that maybe you should catch up with some mutual friends rather than going to the mall alone, hence the reason for Kevin and Hyunjae tagging along with you.

The three of you walked around the mall and goofed around, as if you didn’t have a care in the world since they seemed to have noticed your sour mood from looking at the couples in the mall. However, it wasn’t until you had pointed out that you needed to buy a gift for Eric that they finally pulled themselves together to help you come up with something to give to your best friend.

Eric was simple.

He wasn't exactly all that big on expressing what he wanted as he was happy with whatever was given to him, which was why it was almost a challenge for you every year to be attentive of his words and things that he’s had eyes on for a while. Because of this, you made it your goal every Christmas that was spent together to be sure that it was a gift that he would’ve mentioned unintentionally but would’ve hinted that he wanted it.

You suddenly end up at a shelter that was right beside the mall and look at the little animals that were looking for new homes to belong to, remembering all the times that you and Eric had visited a dog cafe this year. For all the times that he mentioned about wanting a dog to keep in your apartment to keep one another company when the other wasn’t there, you had the idea to adopt a golden retriever that had eyes that reminded you of his bright ones.

After signing the adoption papers and looking over papers for immunizations, you agreed to come back tomorrow to pick up your new furry friend as you decided to finally go for a quick coffee break at a nearby cafe. The three of you sat by the window in peace, feeling as though today had already gone by so quick when the events of yesterday in your bedroom started to cloud your thoughts.

It wasn’t likely for him to hide something from you when it came to relationships, and you wondered why he didn’t come to you sooner about it. You also then felt selfish as you didn’t like the idea of him liking someone else because of your own mixed emotions towards him and his flirtatious actions.

There was never any established words between the two of you whenever you exchanged cheesy lines or words of endearment that wouldn’t be seen as normal between best friends, but you wanted to believe that you two were more than that because you shared an apartment together. However, you began to ponder on the idea longer than you had wanted to, because now you were wondering who he might’ve been talking about the other day in your bedroom as you were pitying yourself over the unrequited feelings that you held for your best friend.

“Hey, do you know if Eric has told you guys who he likes?” You ask the two boys that were now looking at you in confusion, giving each other looks before turning to you with their drinks back onto the table.

“I thought that you guys were dating? Are you guys not?” Hyunjae mumbles and his words sent heat up to your cheeks as you were the one that was now flustered at the very thought of your friends assuming that you both had been going out.

Did that go for the rest of them?

Shaking your head slowly in response, you watch as their eyes widen into saucers and it seemed as though lightbulbs had been going off in their heads once you clarified the situation between both you and Eric, making the atmosphere quieter than it already was. Luckily it didn’t last long considering Kevin was the one that broke the silence that was filling up and invading your thoughts of why nobody asked about it.

“It makes sense now, for all the times that he talks about you and Hayoung from calculus.” Kevin says answering your thoughts and you feel your heart sink into your chest at his words, realizing that it was true that he liked someone else.

Maybe it was too selfish of you to bribe for his love with a dog, you think to yourself as a frown was now drawn at the corner of your lips at the thought of the dreadful rejection that you would inevitably face. You wondered how badly you’d be heartbroken after his rejection for your feelings, in which you thought that maybe this was a bad timing to tell him and not go home for the holidays.

It’d be better to ignore him than to face him at all.

“So he likes Hayoung?” You speak up quietly, looking at them while trying to not let your emotions falter the atmosphere, however you could tell that from the looks that they were giving you, one that you knew too well as empathy and pity, that you were in too deep into your own heart.

“I wouldn’t blame him anyways. Good for him.” You whisper and take a sip of the drink that was now bitter on your taste buds, trying to bite back the tears that were threatening to spill from your own eyes at your own selfishness.

“Y/N-”

“It’s fine, guys. I’ll be okay.” You reply and give them a weak smile that doesn’t meet your eyes, because you know that eventually you should tell him the thoughts that cloud your mind more than it should’ve.

You were in love with your best friend, and you hated yourself for never telling him in the first place.

Day Four

“Thank you, I hope that you have a good rest of your afternoon!” You grinned and waved to the shelter owner before taking your new golden retriever friend into your arms to bring into your car.

It was the afternoon before Eric’s birthday that you were finally bringing your gift for him back to your apartment as you were giggling at the excited pup that was trying to give you kisses on your cheek. You let her down onto snow and watched as she took some time exploring the cold snow that was beneath her paws before happily skipping back to where you stood as you crouched down to scratch behind her ears.

“Today is going to be fun huh, Byeol?” You whisper, looking at the way that her golden fur resonated the bright stars that you were so used to seeing at night whenever you couldn’t sleep.

Your plan for today was ideally to surprise him with Byeol, hoping that maybe he would love her as much as you already did in the short span she got familiarized with you. The only change in your plan was that you had forgotten he was conditioning today at the batting place, making you want to give Byeol to him earlier than you had planned.

Maybe this time you’d be able to find the guts to tell him with Byeol there with you.

Already driving to where you knew that he would be conditioning near your campus, you hummed to yourself while pretending to make a conversation with Byeol, hoping that the golden retriever’s presence could ease your nerves at the moment. There were a million scenarios that were already playing out in your head as you were scared for what was yet to come when you would by then arrive. However, all you were scared of was his reaction for when you would tell him, since he was your best friend overall before anything else.

You make it to the nearby gymnasium with Byeol in your arms, shushing her quietly as you wanted for her to be a surprise for when you had found Eric by the batting cages, but for some reason you felt a bit breathless.

He was easily recognizable as you could tell who your best friend was immediately by his amazing skills considering he was the ace, but there was something that felt off. You were most definitely feeling the familiar butterflies that fluttered in your stomach, but there was someone that approached him first when he went on a short breather before you could even make yourself visible.

“Youngjae! You did really great!” A girl squeals and based on her tone and appearance from where you stood, you knew that it was Hayoung.

Oh.

“What are you doing here, Hayoung? I didn’t expect for you to be here, since I thought you did student council?” He had asked her with his hands on his hips when she gave him a small shrug before moving closer to him so that they were now only inches apart.

You felt like someone had stuck something into your heart and twisted it tight enough for the dulling ache to appear in it. Of course Hayoung would be here, you think to yourself, as you think that he must’ve invited her to watch him practice and condition to win her over that way, making you feel even more hurt from the thoughts that were now reentering your mind.

“I have heard from the grapevine that you had liked me, and I wanted to ask you if you wanted to go on a date since I liked you too?” You hear Hayoung ask him slowly and watch as she walks up to him with a smile on her face as she looks at him with a soft smile on her face, making your heart strings pull at the sight of it in agony.

Deciding to head back to your apartment, you left the scene as Byeol continues to walk with you back home in the chilly air. You think to yourself in that moment that you were right about your thoughts, about how you never would have stood a chance considering he had only seen you as a best friend and nothing more.

And it hurt knowing that there was nothing you could do to possibly change his mind.

Eric, on the other hand, was looking at Hayoung in confusion as she was still looking at him with a smile, when he had suddenly let out a quiet no. Her face scrunched up at the response as she was confused as to why he would say it, but there was something in him that knew it didn’t feel right, even if he had told his friends that he liked Hayoung.

The only reason why he had told them that he liked her in the first place was to lie about his feelings towards you, knowing that they wouldn’t be reciprocated with the miscommunication you both had about unrequited love.

“Hayoung, I don’t like you in the way that you think I do,” He says slowly and watches as her face then contorts to one of sadness until she gives him a weak smile as he thinks that maybe she knew why.

“You’re in love with Y/N, aren’t you?” She whispers in a quiet tone, making Eric feel guilty about the way that he was rejecting her when he was admitting in that moment that he actually did fall in love with you more than he should’ve been.

It was as though a flip as switched as he suddenly had the urge to go find you and leave the indoor batting range, wanting to talk to you instead before it was too late to even say it.

“Yes, yes I do love Y/N.”

Day Five

Eric is sprinting his way past the cold December night back to your apartment as he was tightly clutching onto his baseball gear from conditioning. He knows that although it was less than forty degrees outside while it was beginning to sprinkle light specks of snow, he shouldn’t be running this late in this weather.

However, the events of earlier had finally clicked as he was still running to your shared place with his heart beating loudly in his chest.

The apple watch that he adorned on his wrist had shown that it was already five minutes before midnight, making him think that you could possibly still be awake doing something if you were watching a drama like you usually would on a Friday night. He began to wish that maybe it wasn’t too late for him to tell you everything that was going on in his mind while his thoughts were running at half a million miles per hour.

It doesn’t take him much longer to finally arrive at your apartment complex as he had darted up the stairs to rush and find you as quickly as he can. Although he might’ve been slightly shivering, he couldn’t help but continue to think about what you could say when he tells you that he had loved you.

Would you hate him for it, or would you actually reciprocate those same emotions?

When he unlocks the door to a dark apartment, he notices the dimly lit kitchen where there was a small cake waiting for him, a candle that was unlit as a note was visibly seen beside all of it. He checks the clock in your living room to realize that it was a little past midnight, the date underneath it illuminating that it was now the twenty second of December.

“Happy birthday, Sohn.”

He turns around almost immediately, nearly giving himself a whiplash because of it, to face you who was holding Byeol in your arms. There was a long beat of silence that passed by between you both, him being in shock that you had a new puppy in your arms and you noticing how he looked tired even in the darkness as the two of you continued to look at one another. It wasn’t until you noticed that he was slightly shivering where he had stood that made you snap out of it and blink back to reality.

“Eric, did you actually just run when it started snowing? You’re going to get sick, you idiot.” You say, almost bursting into shouts and put Byeol back onto the floor to grab him some warm blankets when you suddenly feel him grab your wrist gently.

Without another word, he goes in for a soft kiss on your lips and you hesitate for a moment as you realize what was going on. It didn’t take long for you to pull him back in for another kiss when you felt him slightly pull away, wanting to let him know with the kiss that your thoughts were exactly in line with his.

Even if these past five days of indirectly confessing to him were painful.

When you both finally pull away to collect your thoughts and breaths, he holds you close as his forehead rests on yours as you look up at him in curiosity, wondering where the sudden boldness of his actions had blossomed from. However, it was the sounds of Byeol barking that made you look down and giggle at the small golden retriever before picking her up into your arms again.

“I don’t think I’ll get sick, if I have you with me,” He whispers quietly, a small smile painting his lips as he looks into your eyes before looking down at Byeol, “Is this little puppy ours to keep?”

“She’s technically your birthday and Christmas gift, so yes,” You grinned as he carefully takes her away from your arms to hold into his, cooing softly at the beautiful fur coat when you realized what had just happened in the past few minutes, “Hey, why did you kiss me? What if I get sick too?”

“Then I guess we’ll both spend our Christmas sick, but with cuddles, kisses and our new baby as a couple. How does that sound sweetheart?” He muses, making heat rush up to your cheeks as his lips were now somewhat hovering right over yours when you quickly pecked his lips cheekily before grinning to yourself while crossing your arms in front of your chest.

“I suppose it wouldn’t be a bad idea, since my best friend will finally be my boyfriend this year.”

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theficplug · 4 years

Text

ll 𝒾 𝒻𝑜𝓇𝑔𝑜𝓉 𝓉𝑜 𝒷𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒𝓇 ll

Yahya x Black Reader

{a little malcolm & marie loosely, not so loosely inspired fic and after seeing a few things from Yahya. I’ve decided to write this.}

Warnings: none, i think ? possible tw: the brief mention of abandonment issues

Yahya was already padding through your shared cozy modern loft.

His “good shoes'' as he calls them, long forgotten by the welcome mat.

He headed straight to the kitchen to reheat leftovers from the Valentine's Day dinner you prepared for him last night.

“Hors d'oeuvres weren't cutting it baby. And it was dry as hell.” he says jokingly as he turns on the Alexa.

All Night by Beyonce plays softly in the background.

“What’s with you? You’ve barely said two words since we’ve gotten back from the event. You mad?” he asks slinging the blazer over the counter and kicking back against it.

"I'm not angry Yahya. I want to take this tight ass dress off, have a warm shower , and go to bed. Can I do that in peace? " You say to him as you kick off the heels and make your way to the bedroom.

He was right on your trails as he followed you in and crossed his arms.

“You looked beautiful tonight. Look at you.” he compliments

The day of love was supposed to be just that but it felt like it was veering towards the opposite end of the spectrum. You take off your ears placing them in the jewelry holder carefully before sighing and kicking off your heels next.

Yahya reassured you that he’d be home for Valentines Day but instead chose to take the last minute wrap dinner with his castmates and talk with the producers of his current project to secure the role on the next.

You were more than happy for your man after busting his ass and finally securing a major role in the reboot of Candy Man and the newest male lead in his upcoming show. You truly were but it seemed as though for a while now he held no space for you in his chaotic world.

You could feel Yahya eyeing you down as you silently, apart from the occasional huffing and puffy or mumbling little words to yourself.

Yahya stands in the doorway of your bedroom watching you angrily snatch the clothes from the floor and set them aside before unzipping your dress.

He frowns for a second before loosening his tie and contemplating walking over to you and helping you. After unzipping your cherry coloured silk gown the rest of the way his hands caresses slowly from your hips to your back, up your arms and finally settle on your shoulders. Yahya moves your hair curls to the side for a second placing soft kisses on to your neck.

His hands already pulling at the end of your dress to your waist letting his hands wander

He gazes at you for a moment noticing that the stoic expression is still etched across your face.

"So you just gon’ be silent with me the whole night? No congratulatory kisses for your man."

“For.” kiss. “Your.” kiss. “Man.” kiss.

He whispers again against your neck and you move his hands off of you gently.

"What’s up with you?" He asks again this time his voice laced with confusion as he tries to figure out why you've been acting this way since you left the event and the restaurant.

"Nothing. Don't worry about it. I'm just tired. I ended up working all day yesterday since you didn’t come home and now I just want to relax and sleep." You reply before stripping down to just your stockings and grabbing your shower gels and caddy.

"How am I supposed to fix whatever is going on here if you're going to act like this? What's wrong with you?" He asks again this time a little more concerned with the way you brushed him off.

"What's wrong with me? Hmmm, Let's see, I've had to take care of our home and its repairs by myself for the past 8 months. I feel like I’m in a relationship by myself most days. And my fiance drives me to yet another fucking cast dinner . Where he fails to put his castmate in her place when she was clearly flirting with him right in front of his fiancee." You unload and Yahya whips his head around at you to process all of your words.

He cocks his head to the side before scoffing at your accusations.

"So, instead of telling me how you felt you’d rather fucking explode on me on tonight of all nights. When I’ve just landed a record breaking 6 season extension and approval from Netflix. Who basically has the film industry by it’s balls right now. I’m not a mind reader. Baby, I didn’t know that she was going to say all of that. I was trying to be professional and let her make a fool of herself all on her own." He replies and you walk in the bathroom to put all of your things on the counter.

“Oh, I picked you because I knew we would drive the fans absolutely freaking wild. You know we’re just hot and have that chemistry on and off camera to make it you know like, work. Love scenes are easy to portray when you’ve got a man like Yah as your scene partner.” you mock her nasally and obnoxious tone as you pucker your lips mimicking her stiff lip fillers.

"You never do Yahya. Nothing’s ever your fault! The waitress that asked if you could bench press her. The random woman holding onto your arm at the “celebratory dinner” in Denmark. I saw the pictures. You can have your head tossed back laughing hysterically with her but you can't even pick up the phone and see how your fiancee is holding up in the first winter without you here.``

"That’s not fair. It was dinner. The director’s daughter. A dinner that he attended too. What do you want me to say? "No I'll sit this one out because my girl doesn't want me to talk to other people because she still hasn't learned to deal with her insecurities and projects them onto everything I do"." he retorts and you stare him in the eye before tears well in yours.

The silence falls over both of you as you stare him down. He was really standing here bringing out things you've told him during past pillow talks.

You stare at each other in the mirror and he immediately wraps his arms around you to apologize and kiss all over your shoulder and face.

"No, You tell them that I can count on one hand how many months out of the year we spent together last year. You tell them that my girl had to spend Christmas watching everyone else get loved on and share the holiday cheer while I got to watch you skii over facetime. You tell them my girl made a beautiful steak dinner last night and got me tickets to watch my favourite fucking team for VaIentine’s Day, but I’d rather spend it talk about an old white guy’s scripts. I thought about breaking up with you around Thanksgiving before you came home. I blamed it on the distance, you know. I just felt that way because I only ever got to see you over facetime for what seemed like an hour or 2 a day. I said that when you came home everything would be okay again. I think that I may have been wrong. There’s two people in this relationship. But I also feel as though I may be holding onto something that's just not there." you tell him before grabbing your things out of his hands and stepping into the shower.

Yahya swallowed hard and looked down at you for a moment, his jaw going slack for a second but his pride not letting him admit that he may have been in the wrong.

"You didn’t tell me none of this. When I call you and I ask you how are you feeling? You always say it’s fine , it’s fine, everything’s fine. I mean we knew the kind of lives we lived when we got on this ride together. You traveled. I traveled. We traveled together. That’s how it was until you decided that acting wasn’t for you. I’m not abandoning you bae. That’s not what’s happening here." Yahya explains as he starts his skincare routine.

You let the warm water wash over you and the coils of your hair as you peel off the lashes and let out a long sigh.

Yahyah knew that one of your things was that you didn’t want to feel like a burden or to feel like you’ve been forgotten but this rough spat felt different.

"I wanted you. I wanted you to hold me and tell me you loved me and that I looked pretty for once."

"You always look pretty though. You know that."

“Happy Anniversary, Yahya.” you say quietly and you can hear him let out a drawn out “damn it” as he washes the cleanser off his face and looks up at you through the fogged glass.

He drops his head slighly as he stands at the door before openingn it. .

“I’m going to fix all of this. I love you and I want you to know that I’m sorry. You are the last person in my life that I wanna lose or hurt. I need you to know that I’m still the one you can turn to. You’re still the one I wanna experience this life with. Your greatest joys and highs. Your sad days when you just need to be held. The days where we lay together in bed and I can hear your heartbeat. Probably the cheesiest shit you've ever heard but it's my favourite sound I mean you calling out my name is a close second but that one is my favourite.” he reassures. He relaxes against your touch when you turn to face him and wrap your arms around him.

Yahya embraces you, unphased by the fact that his shirt and pants are getting soaked.

“Now that I’m thinking about it. I’ve fallen in love with you over and over again. There’s so many layers to you. It’s everyday I’m falling in love with something new about you. Even on days like this. First time I fell in love with you. We were sitting at this coffee shop tapping your pencil against a notepad. You had Diary by Alicia Keys stuck in your head and you kept singing parts of the song to me throughout the day. You had this pretty floral pattern type of baby blue dress that fell off your shoulders. You wore your grandmother’s ring cause you said it always calms your nerves to have her there with you when you auditioned. Nobody had even heard of me before. I was going for some feature film role. At the time you were going for a recurring role on the Young & The Restless or some show like that. I remember you were reading the script and you let out a laugh. It was your laugh. The loud remedy of it curing the butterflies in my stomach. The little patch of the 4c bangs in the front, the rest of your hair slicked back into a puff. I loved the way that it framed your lil round face. The gold hoops against your deep beautiful brown skin. I liked the way you did your makeup. With the lil highlight at the tip of your nose. It made you look like a lil fairy...I proposed to you that day. After 6 months of knowing you. Baby it was you, everything about you. You were laughing at having dump iced coffee all over your scene partner’s head but I was smiling because I knew. I was like so this is what made all them oldheads sing like that in the blues songs my daddy used to play. I wanted to be in it for the long haul. And I still do. I know I got a lot of making up to do. But I want you to know that I see you. I see you and I’m going to do what I need to do to make everything more than just alright. I love you.”

You let his words soak in as he cupped your face and you nodded along to his words. After helping him strip off his drenched clothes he steps into the shower with you where you embraced him in your arms gain.

“You’ve always told me that you knew early on but you never told me. I love you too, you know. It’s just you know how I am more than anybody. I know that your dreams are finally coming true and you deserve that. I don’t want to stand in the way of that. But I still find a way to balance my work and our relationship. I just want you to meet me in the middle.” you say against his lips before capturing his plump lips in a kiss.

“I’m gonna fix it..” He reassures you in between kisses

“We’ve still got 3 hours left of our anniversary. Our record is 5. We can still try to break that” you whisper in his ear-

( i don’t know what this is lol. sorry I didn’t get any valentines posts up. i had a whole migraine and have had more low days than up in the past weeks but we keep going. i hoped you like this little, i dont know what to call it. i dont really know how to write fluff lol so here’s the angst.)

#yahya abdul mateen ii #yahya x black reader #fanfic for black girls

152 notes · View notes

radiantroope · 4 years

Text

Passed Around || JJ Maybank

pairing: jj x reader

mentions: john b, pope, kiara

requested: no

summary: everyone in the outer banks has their opinions of you. a touron with a smart mouth learns just how quick jj will come to your defense.

warnings: underage consumption of drugs/alcohol, swearing, violence, blood

author’s note: i just started writing randomly and this was the product, enjoy.

masterlist | add yourself to my tag list

* i do not own this gif! if it’s yours, please let me know so i can properly credit you! *

Of course, there was another party at The Boneyard. No surprise there. Summer or Winter, there was always a party. The amount of people that filled the beach always somehow managed to surprise you, especially when it was off season for the tourists. Sometimes you’d still get a couple; people visiting family who lived on the island for Thanksgiving or Christmas.

It was the beginning of December and you’d just arrived at the beach, already hearing thumping music and loud laughter. The brisk ocean air was much colder than you preferred as it came off the ocean. You were yearning for those hot Summer nights again.

You pulled the jacket you were wearing tighter around yourself and continued on your way down to your friends. Just as you hopped over one of the dead and forgotten trees, you heard a shout of your name. You looked to the kegs and smiled when you saw Kiara waving her arm.

As you approached her, you raised an eyebrow at the three kegs set up. Three, how did they manage to score three? You didn’t ask, sometimes you were just better off not knowing. You gratefully took the plastic cup John B passed you and quickly drank some of the bitter liquid.

“Rough day?” the curly haired boy raised an eyebrow at you.

You scoffed and rolled your eyes but ranted anyway, “My grandma is still here. She was supposed to leave after Thanksgiving and now my parents tell me she’s staying all the way through Christmas! If I have to listen to her talk about what college I should go to or about boys any longer, I’m gonna go insane!”

“Does- she doesn’t know about JJ?” Kiara asked with her brows furrowed.

“Oh, she does, but she’s in some alternate reality where she thinks I’ll marry a Kook and be a trophy wife,” you retorted with a sarcastic smile on your face, “My mom’s told her a hundred times that JJ and I are together and nothing will change that.”

You looked over your shoulder at the said blonde who was sitting in a circle with some other teenagers. You saw smoke pillowing through the air and were hit with the faint smell of weed. JJ’s cerulean eyes caught yours and he smiled, waving for you to join him.

“Go, we’ll catch up about your crazy grandma later,” Kiara said, smiling at you.

You smiled back at the girl and turned to walk towards your boyfriend, calling over your shoulder, “Love you, Kie!”

You and JJ had gotten together about nine months ago. Years of longing looks and lingering touches were driving your friends insane. How could two people be so oblivious? Everyone knew your hearts were set on each other, but the two of you were always too stubborn to admit it. Plus, you didn’t want to be the one to break the no macking rule.

One day at the Chateau it boiled over when one of your hookups over stayed his welcome. JJ woke up for the third morning in a row to find the guy helping himself to his stash. He lost it. He wailed on the poor boy and literally kicked him out the door. This resulted in you insisting you liked him and the blonde calling bullshit.

“How do you know how I feel, JJ? You don’t!” you’d screamed, stomping your foot like an angry toddler who’d just been told no as you tried to get your point across.

“Yes I do! Pope told me you’re in love with me!”

Yeah, Pope spilled the beans after you made the drunken confession one night. You swore him to secrecy, but that boy couldn’t keep secrets to save his life most of the time. You still to this day would never let him live that down. But how could you stay mad at him when it resulted in the best possible outcome? JJ was yours, and you were his, finally.

“What’s cookin’ good lookin’?” you flirted as you walked over to the blonde boy.

JJ smiled and laughed, shaking his head at you, “You’re rediculous.”

“But you love me,” you stated as you plopped yourself on his lap, sitting most of your weight on his thigh. His arm wrapped around your waist tightly and he pressed a sweet kiss to your cheek.

“Damn right I do.”

You watched as a blunt was passed around the group and listened in on the conversation, chimming in now and again. You took a few puffs yourself when JJ held it up to your lips. You weren’t a big smoker though. Half of the time it made you more anxious than it calmed your down.

JJ had gone to get you both refills on your beers but got distracted talking to Pope and John B. You took his seat and turned to watch him, smiling when he laughed and his eyes crinkled at the corners. His bright white teeth sparkled in the glow of a fire that was going. You watched as the breeze blew his cut off tank and you caught his muscles tense at the cold hair.

“So you and Maybank, huh?” a voice caught your attention and you whipped around.

A Touron, Dominic, who frequented the island this time of year sat in front of you. He had shaggy dark brown hair that was straight and fell around his face, barely touching his jaw. His eyes were a beautiful mossy shade of green. You probably would have hooked up with him in the past is he wasn’t known to be such an ass. He ran around with Rafe and his goons during the day and spent his nights on The Cut causing trouble. He was nicknamed “girlfriend stealer” after many-a-hookups that resulted in ended relationships.

“Yeah,” you responded blandly. There was no way in hell you were going to entertain this kid. He took pride in stealing people’s girls; you would not be one of them.

“You could do better,” Dominic remarked, an infuriating smirk growing on his face. You resisted the urge to slap it right off.

“Like you?” you scoffed, eyebrow raised. “Yeah, I’ll pass.”

“C’mon, Y/N, don’t act like you don’t want to. I remember the way you used to look at me.”

You clenched your jaw and pressed your lips into a line. You stared at him with a blank expression, the smirk on his face growing. He opened his mouth to say something else but was cut off.

“Everything okay over here?” JJ asked from behind you.

He’d seen the way Dominic was looking at you. He knew the game the little shit was playing, and it was a dangerous one. The group of teenagers in the circle you were sitting in looked between the three of you nervously. They all knew better than to push JJ, especially when it came to you. He was quick to fight - even quicker when it was over you.

“Yeah man! Just telling Y/N here she used to be a lot more fun before she got a boyfriend,” Dominic replied casually, shrugging his shoulders a bit.

You stood up and turned to face JJ, seeing that he’d handed your drink refills off to John B and Pope who stood behind him. He’d been anticipating this the moment he saw you two talking. You put your hands on the blonde’s chest and stared up at him.

“Let’s just go, J. It’s not a big deal.”

“Nah, I want to hear what he has to say,” JJ pushed your hands off his chest, eyes never leaving the brunette who was now standing.

Dominic snickered and pushed his hair back off his forehead, saying, “I heard she got passed around quite a bit. Rafe sure had a lot to say about her. Was hoping I could find out for myself.”

Low blow, asshole, you thought to yourself, feeling your stomach sink at the mention of the oldest Cameron sibling. You’d messed around with him long before you and JJ got together, Topper too. It put a rift between you and the Pogues for a while. They didn’t care who you slept with, as long as they weren’t Kooks, but you did what you wanted. JJ was the most upset. You were sleeping with the enemy.

JJ went to walk around you, ready to pummel Dominic into the sand. You grabbed the front of JJ’s shirt and pushed him back with all of your strength. You hated when he got in fights. You couldn’t watch. Most of the time he won, but when he didn’t, you had to clean him up. You tried to keep him out of them the best you could.

“Don’t, JJ, please,” you begged, pushing against his abs, “It’s not worth it.”

JJ’s eyes flickered down to yours, his cold gaze softening a bit when he looked at your pleading face.

“Wow, they weren’t kidding. You really are her bitch,” Dominic said through a laugh when he realized you were convincing JJ not to fight him.

“Shut the fuck up!” you yelled over your shoulder, pushing your boyfriend back once again.

It was useless, JJ managed to get past you, your hands grabbing onto his arms and shirt - whatever you could get ahold of to keep him back. John B grabbed your arm the second the blonde’s fist hit Dominic’s face. You looked back at your curly haired friend and he simply shook his head. Not even Pope moved, they were going to let the guy get his assbeat for talking about you like that. No one talked about you like that.

“Don’t ever talk about her like that again!” JJ yelled, arms swinging, “I’ll kill you, you hear me?! I’ll fucking kill you!”

You tried to shout your boyfriend’s name over the cheering from people watching the fight. He couldn’t hear you, still standing over Dominic who’d been knocked down. He landed blow after blow against the Touron’s face.

“Alright, JJ!” John B yelled, stepping forward.

“He’s had enough, man!” Pope added.

You breathed in deeply through your nose and closed your eyes for a second. As you opened your eyes, you screamed JJ’s name as loud as you could. It was so loud, everyone went quiet and their eyes turned to you.

The blonde froze, fist still pulled back mid swing. His anger fueled frenzy was over and he was brought back to Earth by your voice. He dropped Dominic, who was groaning in pain, into the sand by his shirt. His arm fell to his side and he turned to face you. He had blood trickling down from his nose but other than that, he seemed to be perfectly unharmed.

“Are you done?” you questioned, arms crossing over your chest with a raised brow.

JJ simply nodded in response and walked away from the boy he’d just seriously beaten. He approached you with slumped shoulders and sheepish expression, knowing you were going to scold him for getting in yet another fight. But how could he just stand there and let someone degrade you like that?

“Sorry,” he muttered softly and reached for you, slipping his arm around your shoulders and pulling you back towards the kegs. Kiara stood there, shaking her head as she had watched the altercation from afar.

“If he presses charges, you’re thouroughly fucked, you know that?” you asked him seriously. Though you brought your hand up and intertwined your fingers with his that was hanging off your shoulder.

The blonde boy nodded and took a cup of beer from Kie with his free hand. He downed it all in one go, grunting as he pulled the cup away from his lips. He gave it back for her to refill.

“I know you’re trying to defend me, J, but sometimes I wish you could just walk away,” you sighed and leaned into him, feeling a kiss against the top of your head.

“I’ll try to be better, promise,” he mumbled into your hair and when he pulled his head back you heard him laugh softly. He wiped his hand against your hair and when you looked up at him, he gave you an innocent smile. You saw the trail of blood leaving his nose was smeared and narrowed your eyes.

“You got blood in my hair, didn’t you?”

“Yup.”

727 notes · View notes

im-in-love-with-pizza-bites · 4 years

Text

Hometown

Sebastian Stan x Fem!Reader

Warnings: small age gap (8 years, your 30 he's 38), Swearing

Summary: The reader brings her Boyfriend Sebastian to visit her family for Thanksgiving

Town name and your family's names are made up btw.

Part 2

A/n: Hi y'all Happy Thanksgiving!

You were practically bouncing off the walls in excitement when you woke up this morning. It was the day before Thanksgiving and you were bringing your Boyfriend, Sebastian Stan to visit your family with you, you had moved out of your small town where your family lives when you were 18 because you wanted to follow your dream of being a actress which you succeeded in after starting in a movie with Chris Evans two years ago. At a party Chris had invited you to he introduced you and Sebastian. Currently you were dragging Sebastian through the gate excited to see your family.. "Babe my brothers are waiting come on!" You said. He shook his head jogging to keep up with you.

"Dragoste they aren't gonna leave us here slow down!"

"You don't know that hurry up!" You said. This would be the first time in almost a year you saw your older brothers and to say your excited would be an understatement. You hadn't seen them since the Christmas. You are also excited to meet your youngest niece who was born a few months prior to thanksgiving. You made it out of the gate and looked around spotting the four men, three of them were sitting down a baby stroller sitting next to them, the fourth man stood beside them. "There they are!" You exclaimed letting go of your boyfriends hand and began running to the men. "Matty!" You tackled the man that was standing.

"Jeez!!" He exclaimed falling, the others looked at you shaking their head at you. "Hi baby sis."

"Hi!" You stood up giving hugs to the other three men as Sebastian made it over. "Sebastian these are my brothers, Matt, Jon, Mike, and Justin. Boys this is my boyfriend, Sebastian." You introduced. Your brothers stood up straight giving Sebastian a intimidating look. He would be lying if he said he wasn't worried to meet your older brothers. He was under the impression that they were stereotypical over protective brothers. He knows you are their only sister and the youngest of the five of you. Matthew being the oldest at thirty-seven, Jonathan is thirty-six, Mike is thirty-five, and Justin is thirty four, and you are thirty.

"Hello." Sebastian said shifting on his feet nervously before your brothers broke into smiles.

"Hey Man. Welcome to the family!" Matt said pulling him in a hug. You shook your head laughing as your brothers hugged him and welcomed him to the family. He is the first guy you've brought home since you moved when you were 18.

"Is this my baby niece?" You bent down in front of the stroller where a two-month-old baby sat.

"Yes she is." Justin said.

"Hi there Nora. I'm your auntie y/n." You said in a baby voice. Sebastian looked at you fondly as you made faces and cooed at the baby.

"Okay let's go get your luggage Mom and dad are waiting for us." Matthew said. You stuck your tongue at at him before standing. You grabbed your before hand before the 6 of you before walking to luggage claim. You guys made it to luggage claim grabbing your bags before heading out to Jonathan's mini-van which you teased him for.

"So how do you two meet?" Matt asked as he leaned back in the seat. You didn't tell your family much about yours and Sebastian's relationship.

"At a party Chris invited me to." You said.

"That's all not some exciting and adorable story? Wait Chris?" Justin asked.

"Chris Evans. My co-star? I told you bout him! The guy with the adorable dog!" You said looking down at your phone.

"Oh! That guy!"

"Chris was adamant in us meeting." Sebastian chuckled with you.

"Sebastian. Your an actor like her right?" Matt asked.

"Yeah." Sebastian nodded.

"You're in those marvel movies? My twins talk about them all the time." Jonathan said.

"And so does my oldest." Mike said.

"Yeah I play the Winter Soldier." Sebastian said smiling.

"Cool man I think thats my daughters favorite." Jonathan replied.

"You don't know Samantha's favorite character from movies she talks about 24-7?" Justin asked.

"I'm pretty sure it's him." Jon shrugged as he turned the car down the street leading into your hometown.

"Grayson said something about her favorite being Captain America though." Mike said.

"Ooooh! Jax's favorite is The winter soldier!" Jon said in realization as the car made it into town.

"In a whole year this place didn't even change a bit." You muttered looking out the window as the car passed by shops and houses.

"It never does." Matt said.

"Hey, are my other nieces and nephews waiting at mom and dad's house for us?" You asked your brothers. They each have kids, Matt has two Luna and Benji they are thirteen and eight, Jonathan has four Samantha, and Jaxon who are twins and fourteen, Violet and Hazel who are ten, and nine, Mike has four boys, Grayson, Jasper, Levi, and Griffin who are fourteen, twelve, ten, and four, Justin has three Leo, Oliver, and Nora, they are seven, five and Nora is just a baby. You were the only one without kids but that was because you wanted to wait till you were married to have children.

"No Griffin is but the rest went to get something from Jon's house before we left so they probably aren't back yet." Mike told you as the car pulled into the driveway of a two story house that was far from the street with a large yard that was surrounded by woods after.

"We're here!" You said excitedly as you unbuckled your car. In addition to not seeing your brothers for a year you also didn't see their wives who you were close with since they became your big sisters the second they met you. You had seen your parents when they came to a premiere for one of your movies. Jon parked the car and you climbed out going with Sebastian to the trunk to get your luggage. "See Seb told ya my brothers would love you." You said, he was nervous about coming for two reasons one was leaving his mom alone for the holiday but the three of you decided to celebrate it early, and the other one was just because of the fact the first time he'd be meeting your brothers and most of your family would be on a big holiday.

"You were right dragoste but you still have more family." He said leaning down to kiss you.

"No PDA!" Matt said before Sebastian's lips met your. You pulled away glaring at your brother before you shut the trunk of the van and began to wheel the suitcases up to the house with Sebastian right next to you looking around at the house.

"Mom! We're back!" Mike shouted as the 6 of you entered the house with the addition of Nora who was asleep in her car seat. A four-year-old boy came running at full speed toward you crashing into your legs hugging them tight.

"Griffin!" You said picking the little boy up and giving him a tight hug.

"Hi Auntie!" The boy said before looking up at the man standing beside you. "Who are you?"

"I'm Sebastian, your Aunts boyfriend." Sebastian said smiling at the boy.

"Uncle?" Griffin asked beaming with excitement.

"Sure buddy." Griffin made grabby hands toward Sebastian who gladly took him. You couldn't help but smile at how Sebastian was with your nephew.

"Hun!" Your mom came out of the kitchen pulling you into a hug immediately.

"Hi momma." You said. The two of you pulled away so you could hug your dad while your mom gave Sebastian a hug. "Hi dad."

You walked into the living room Sebastian no longer holding Griffin but Griffin was holding his hand. "Y/n!" You sister in laws said smiling at you, Justin's wife, Elizabeth was the first on to give you a hug, then Colleen, Jon`s wife gave you one followed by Autumn, Matt`s Wife.

"Mommy! This is Uncle Sebastian!" Griffin said to Kristina his mom.

"So your the man Y/n talked about. Nice to meet you I'm Kristina." She said smiling at your boyfriend.

"You too. I'm Sebastian." Your other three sisters-in-law introduced themselves before you showed Sebastian to the room you two would be staying in. "This is where you grew up?" He asked looking at the decorations you had left in the small bedroom when you moved out. "Is this you?" He picked up a photo of you freshman year of high school with braces, you were in a cheer-leading uniform on the back of Justin who was in a football jersey.

"Yeah." You said blushing.

"You were adorable." He said before smirking. "Think you'd still fit in the cheerleader outfit?" He asked suggestively.

"Sebastian!" You exclaimed pushing him playfully making the two of you laugh.

"Seriously you'd be hot in it." He said leaning down to kiss you.

"Whatever you say babe." You laughed hugging him before you heard the sound of 11 kids voices. "You get to meet my favorite people are you ready? This will break or make you." You joked.

"I think I'd rather stay up here with you alone... Wait I thought I was your favorite person!." He said pouting causing you to laugh and push him playfully again.

"Sorry but they win your higher on the list then my brothers though!." You said before three little boys ran into the room. "My boys!" You said leaning down opening your arms for the three to run into them.

"Hi Auntie y/n!" The youngest of the three boys, Oliver said.

"Auntie n/n I missed you!" The oldest of the three, Benji said.

"Auntie y/n who's he?" Leo, Olivers brother asked pulling away from the hug to look up at Sebastian.

"I'm Sebastian." Sebastian said leaning down to their height.

"He's uncle Seb!" Griffin said as he walking in his older brother, Grayson following.

"Your actually dating Sebastian Stan! I thought dad was lying!" Grayson exclaimed staring at the man, Sebastian chuckled at the excitement of your nephew.

"Hi what's your name?" Sebastian asked not directing it to one of the boys in particular though he had a guess to which was which. You told him about all of them.

"I'm Benji. Can we actually call you uncle Seb?"

"Sure." Sebastian said.

"I'm Leo! Uncle Seb how does Grayson know who you are?"

"I'm the winter solider." Sebastian said in a hushed secretive tone.

"Cool! I'm Oliver!" Sebastian stood up looking at the teenager waiting to hear his name though he know it was Grayson because of what Leo had said. You stood up holding Oliver.

"I'm Grayson.. Do I have to call you uncle?" Grayson asked. He was a fan sure him and two of his cousins loved marvel but he found calling a guy he just met uncle a little strange now it may not seem weird to his four year old brother or younger cousins but that's mainly because they are young.

"No." Sebastian said.

"Come on now Seb has to meet the others now." You said.

"Jax is going to freak." Grayson said leaving the bedroom you, Sebastian, and the younger boys following behind. "Me, him, and Samantha are massive fans." He said. You couldn't help but smile already seeing your boyfriend bond with your nephews.

"Really? Were all three of you team cap?" Sebastian asked.

"Sebastian stan!" A girls voice exclaimed from the bottom of the stares where two teens who looked alike stood staring at your boyfriend.

"Hi!" Sebastian said waving at them as you guys made your ways down the stairs.

"I'm here too!" You pouted. Jaxon was the first to break from the trance and give you a hug, then Samantha did the same as your younger nephews ran off to play.

"Your actually dating Sebastian stan?" Samantha asked you.

"No he's just a cardboard cutout." You joked.

"A really realistic one." Your boyfriend said.

"Hi! I'm Jaxon! This is my twin Samantha."

"Grayson said you guys are fans. Were you two on team cap?" Sebastian asked.

"I was on team ironman." Grayson said.

"I was team cap!" Samantha said.

"Team Ironman." Sebastian feigned hurt as he gasped.

"But I'm dating you aunt and I'm on team cap." He said.

"We're still team ironman." Grayson said.

"You my favorite." Sebastian whispered to Samantha jokingly.

"Ha!" She said to Grayson and Jaxon sticking her tongue out at them.

"She's only on team Cap because she has a crush on Chris Evans." Jaxon said. You couldn't help but laugh. You knew about this crush because your niece was so excited to know you were starring in a film with Chris.

"Jax!" Samantha exclaimed smacking him. The two of them began argue as siblings do. You and Grayson just shrugged when Sebastian looked at you guys.

"Was that my fault?" Sebastian whispered to you.

"No they fight over nonsense all the time." You assured. "Come one you still have to meet the rest of my nieces and nephews." You said leaving the teenagers to figure out their problems on their own.

"Uncle Seb! Come play with us!" Griffin ran over to you two pulling Sebastian outside where you noticed most of your family was now. Griffin pulled Sebastian to where your nieces and nephews except the oldest three were playing soccer. You sat down next to Justin who was feeding nora.

"The kids seem to love him. I've never seen Oliver this outgoing around an adult that isn't one of us." He said watching as Oliver kicked the soccer ball to Sebastian.

"Yeah." You agreed watching as Luna blocked the ball from the diy goals that were set up in the front yard. They were just arches made out of some extra wood from a project your parents did a while ago those arches have been their since you were six. There were two that we're across from each other.

"You finally found a good guy sis." Matt said as he sat down next to you. "And he's good with kids."

You watched as the three teenagers who formerly inside came out to join their cousins/siblings. "He's got the teens playing with the little kids! I can't even get Grayson to watch Griffin for a few minutes." Mike said joining the three of you.

"Why aren't you out there? Your the pro at playing soccer with them." Jonathan said walking over. You shrugged watching as Hazel kicked the ball to Sebastian it accidentally hitting him in the crotch. He let out a groan that your couldn't hear as he fell to the ground.

"Sorry!" Hazel exclaimed as you ran down to them.

"You okay babe?" You asked Sebastian.

"Yeah just need a break." He said staying in his position on the grass groaning.

"You killed him." Samantha said jokingly to her sister.

"I didn't mean too!"

"Girls he'll be fine he's just being a big baby." You joked. Sebastian glared at you finally sitting up before you tackled you smirking at you.

"Dogpile on Aunt y/n!" Samantha exclaimed before jumping onto Sebastian's back making you and your boyfriend groan. The rest of your nieces and nephews joined besides Nora for obvious reasons. Unbeknownst to you and Sebastian, Colleen took a photo.

"Okay can I be free now?" You asked.

"No!" Griffin said.

"You have to give us cookies before dinner!" Oliver said.

"Okay fine but you can't tell my brothers or your moms." You agreed. The kids got off and ran into the house ready for their cookies. Your brothers were all gonna go home with their families before dinner so this was the only chance for your nieces and nephews to get their cookies.

"So doll you said that would make or break me how did I do?" Sebastian asked holding himself above you with his hands on either side of your head.

"You did great even my brothers admitted it." You said smiling. "Now come one there are thirteen kids waiting for cookies it's going to become a riot if they don't get any." You said as Sebastian got off helping you up.

The rest of the day went great your brothers and sisters-in-law loved him, the kids adored him. It is now Thanksgiving, your brothers and their families are already here the kids, you, and Sebastian watching the parade on Tv. You leaned against Sebastian 's shoulder as your nieces and nephews excitedly pointed at the floats. Nora was sat your lap sucking on a binky as she watched her brothers and cousins go crazy over the floats.

"Doll when are we gonna have one of these?" Sebastian asked looking down at the baby.

"Not for awhile Stan." You said bouncing the baby. You actually loved being the cool aunt that didn't have any kids of her own especially when sometimes during the summer you get to bring your older nieces and nephews back to New York with you for the summer which they always love. It's really only when you don't have any filming going on.

"But come on I think Nora wants a new cousin." He smirked at you.

"I think she should beg her other aunts and uncles for one then." You said.

"Please I want a cousin close to my age!" He lifted the baby up the his face her facing you as he did a baby voice.

"Not happening." You laughed taking you niece back. "Keep dreamin babe. But you gotta put a ring on my finger before you put a baby in me." You looked but at your nieces and nephews who were laughing and playing around.

"Will you marry me." He whisper pulling a ring pop out of a candy bowl your parents had in the living room for the kids. You couldn't help but laugh.

"Sorry but I like my jewelry not to be edible." You joked trying to take the ring.

"No! You don't get the ring you said no!" He pouted.

"Hey love birds! Stop flirting while you have my daughter on your laps!" Justin said walking over and taking the baby from you. "I'm sorry baby that must have been scary."

"Okay okay Justin." You laughed. "We won't flirt anymore.

"Speak for yourself. I can't resist it." Sebastian said pulling you closer to him making you laugh.

"Whatever Y/n Mom wants you in the kitchen."

You stood giving you boyfriend a smile before walking into the kitchen. "Yes mom?" You asked.

"Can you and Sebastian go down to the basement to kid the kids table and chairs?" She asked not looking up at you from the turkey.

"Okay." You turned around going to the living. "Seb come help me get the kids table and chairs." You said peaking into the living. You saw your sister in laws and brothers now there talking to your boyfriend.

"Coming doll." Sebastian stood up walking over to you before following you to the basement door.

"Into the dungeon." You said opening it to reveal some rickety looking stairs.

"Gonna lock me down here? My fans will notice I'm gone though." Sebastian laughed following you.

"Maybe I will." You laughed going over to a fold up table. "Here's the table let's get it up stairs." You said lifting a end of it. He grabbed the other end and the two of you brought it up the stairs. You set it in the dining room before going back to the basement to grab the chairs. After you finished grabbing everything, Levi and Jasper stole Sebastian to go play outside with while you set the table up. You sighed finishing setting up the table before going out the back door to see all of your nieces and nephews crowding around your boyfriend, him holding two of them, Jasper was on his back while he held Griffin on his hip. You couldn't help but smile before taking a photo of them for Instagram you captioned it happy thanks giving then posted it tagging Sebastian, your brothers, and your sister in laws in it. Your oldest three niece and nephews have Instagrams but you never tag them in your posts deciding to keep them away from the unwarranted fame that comes from being a actress' niece and nephews. Your boyfriend looked at you smiling as Jasper jumped off his back and Leo tried to take his cousin's spot.

"When will we have one of those! You need a mini you running around the apartment." Sebastian whisper to you as you guys went back into the dining room where your family had been waiting.

"Okay love birds cut it out!" Jon said rolling his eyes as you sat down. You stuck your tongue out at him. (Add saying grace if your family does. Mine doesn't so I don't know how to do that)

The dinner was filled with laughter as everyone began talking about what had happened in the year you hadn't seen each other. You and Sebastian went into better detail on how you met. You met him two years ago a month after filming the movie you were in with Chris E. Your sister in laws asked about the movies he had been two of them knowing a lot about the Marvel movies he had been in because of their kids. Your mom shared as many embarrassing stories as she could. "When she was 4 she was the bossiest kid, she'd make the boys make be in mini movies with her, we still have some of those I'll find them." She said.

"Mom! No!" You whined laughing.

"I'm sure you were just as good of an actress back then as you are now." Sebastian said smiling at you. You shook your head.

"No the videos are so embarrassing." You mumbled.

"Yeah for all of us! You used to make us put your tiny ass pink dresses on." Matt said. They could never say no to you. So wearing a pink dress 7 sizes too small was something they did for you. You didn't fit into those dresses again until you was 13 because they stretched them out.

"You didn't have to say yes!" You laughed.

"None of us could say no to you! You would pull the puppy dog eyes then we'd be in dresses!" Justin said. Sebastian laughed knowing exactly what Justin meant. He could resist your puppy dog eyes either.

"Or our Halloween candy! You took all my snickers!" Mike said pouting.

"Your still mad at me for that! I did the dishes for a month to make it up to you!" You said laughing.

"Get over it babe." Kristina said. She knew all about this whole thing as she was friends with your brother most of your guys childhoods.

"You're supposed to be on my side!" Mike whined.

"She likes me more!" You teased sticking your tongue out at him. Sebastian watched fondly as you and your family joked and brought up old stories. He smiled every time you got embarrassed over a story your brothers and their wives decided to bring up. You looked over at him a smile so big that looked it hurt.

"Sebastian do you have any new roles? I already know y/n has a project coming up." Autumn asked you before taking a sip of her wine.

"Filming for Falcon and the winter soldier started a few months ago actually." Sebastian said beginning to talk about his role to which there was plenty input shouted from the kid's table from Grayson and the twins.

After dinner everyone watched a movie once it was over your brothers and their families went home then you and Sebastian retreated to your bedroom. "You told me you only use your puppy dog eyes on me." Sebastian said pouting at you.

"No I just implied that I never made it a fact." You smirked at him hugging him. "You know maybe we should have a baby. The world need another Stan." You thought aloud. Though you probably only thought that due to the fact you got baby fever everytime you were around your brothers kids.

"Really?" Sebastian looked down at you beaming with delight.

"Sure why not?" You said closing your eyes as you rested you head on his chest.

"Maybe we should start trying." He smirked as your eyes popped open and glared at him.

"No! My family is still here." You said. "We'll start trying for a baby when we get home." You muttered.

"But why not a headstart." He pushed a little harder jokingly, he, in reality, didn't mind waiting but he liked how you looked when you got annoyed he found it cute.

"Because my parents are down stairs!"

"They won't hear." He teased smiling at you as you scrunched you eyebrows up glaring at him. "Chill baby I'm joking." You sighed laying you head on his chest once again.

"You better be." You mumbled yawning.

"Come on baby let's get you ready for bed." He kissed your forehead smiling at you. He was immensely happy with you agreeing to start a family.

You woke up the next morning remembering your talk with Sebastian and you couldn't help but smile. Especially when you began thinking about what your family's reactions were gonna be. You knew your brothers would be excited for another niece or nephew, you parents would be a little iffy as you want to start before marriage, the kids would love having another cousin, and your sisters in law have been saving their kids clothing for you since each of their youngests except Elizabeth's grew out of them. You rolled over to look at Sebastian but found that he wasn't there. You furrowed your brows before climbing out of bed to make your way downstairs to find him, but first you got dressed. As you were making your way to the stairs you could hear talking from downstairs. You made it to the kitchen where Colleen was smiling ear to ear at you with Sebastian sitting next to her with a guilty look on his face, your parents weren't in the room but you could hear them talking in the living room.

"Your trying for a baby!!! Your gonna be a mom!" Colleen squealed jumping up and down giving you a hug.

"How did you find that out?"

"I let it slip on accident." Sebastian gave you an apologetic smile.

"Colleen you can't tell anyone!" You said.

"Fine but when you find the gender out! I have some adorable clothes from each of my kids you can have!"

"Thank you." You chuckled before going to sit down by Sebastian. "Good job."

"I didn't mean to."

"It's fine babe." You said giving him a kiss.

"You guys are so in love you two better make me a bridesmaid at the wedding." Colleen said before leaving to kitchen.

By the time the week ended your family grew attached to Sebastian. Your oldest three niece and nephews were definitely the most attached enjoying to ask him questions about the marvel movies and their favorite actors from the franchise Sebastian was a little butt hurt he wasn't any of theirs favorites. Your younger nieces and nephews loved him, the girls all managed to get him dressed up as a princess with a tutu and all. You obviously posted a photo of him and your nieces all dressed up. Your older brothers were definitely grateful that he was the guy you brought home knowing you have had plenty of failed relationships in the twelve years since you left town. Your sister-in-laws were more then happy to welcome into the family even before you brought him and their opinions on him didn't change.

#sebastian stan x reader #thanksgiving #sebasstan #sexy seabass #sebastian stan #sebastian stan x you

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jalapeno-princess · 4 years

Text

Back to you

Mark Tuan X Reader

Word Count: 11.3K

Genre: Angst with a happy ending (idk if I can even consider it happy exactly but they both get what they want in the end)

Summary: It’s been over two years since Mark decided to end your relationship together and you’ve been bitter about everything since the day he left. The last thing you expected was to see him on your front porch claiming he made a mistake in breaking up with you and no matter how much he broke your heart, there was no way you could forget just how happy you were because of him and how much you still loved him.

Author’s Note: I know I say this about most of my stories, but I really don’t know how I feel about this one. After hearing the song “Cardigan” by Taylor Swift, I really wanted to write a story based off of it because songs tend to stick in my mind until I finish writing a story so this might seemed a little bit rushed, repetitive and some of it might not even make sense I apologize in advance and I think I’m going to take a few days off from writing just because school and work is getting more and more busy (and to those who requested stories just know I still plan on finishing your requests thank you for your patience) with that, please enjoy.

Vintage tee, brand new phone High heels on cobblestones When you are young, they assume you know nothing Sequin smile, black lipstick Sensual politics When you are young, they assume you know nothing But I knew you Dancing in your Levi's Drunk under a streetlight, I I knew you Hand under my sweatshirt Baby kiss it better, right And when I felt like I was an old cardigan under someone's bed You put me on and said I was your favorite A friend to all is a friend to none Chase two girls, lose the one When you are young, they assume you know nothing

“Babe.”

You could feel yourself drifting in and out of sleep and it was because you were exhausted from both work and school. Being a full time college student majoring in Biology and minoring in English while having a full-time job wasn’t the most ideal situation, but you were handling it pretty well.

When your boyfriend picked you up right after work and took you back to his apartment, all you wanted to do was change in to one of his shirts that was two sizes too big for you and go to sleep with his arms wrapped tightly around your waist. However, Mark had different plans in mind. Your boyfriend was aware that you were extremely tired and he hated how you were overworking yourself, but he knew not to say anything in fear of getting in to an argument with you.

Being friends for over ten years and dating for three was enough time for the older boy to learn every single thing about you. You were always so independent and it was something Mark both loved and hated about you. He hated seeing you cry over how frustrating college was, he hated listening to you degrade yourself and talk negatively about your accomplishments and what he hated most of all, was not getting to spend time with you.

If you weren’t at work, you were at school and vice versa and it wasn’t like Mark had much time on his hands either. He was four months away from graduating with his bachelor’s degree in engineering and he decided not too long ago that he would go after his master’s degree right after. Spending time with you was Mark’s favorite pastime and it didn’t matter to him what the two of you were doing; as long as you were around, he was content.

You released an exhausted sigh when he insisted on watching a movie on Netflix, but you didn’t have the heart to tell him no. Even though you were on the verge of falling asleep, you were willing to do anything to make him happy. However, the two of you weren’t even halfway through the movie when Mark noticed your head bobbing up and down and the sight made him giggle softly.

God, he was so in love with you.

When you heard him call out for you, you practically jolted awake from being startled and gave yourself a couple of moments to process your surroundings and what was going on. He brought his hand up to your face and cupped your cheek ever so gently while running his fingers through your hair.

“Did you want to go to sleep? We can continue this tomorrow. I’ll carry you to the room.” You gave him an adorable, sleepy smile before shaking your head. “I’m awake, I’m fine. Let’s keep watching whatever movie this is—“ you were too tired to see him playfully roll his eyes at you and before you knew it, he turned off the tv and picked you up bridal style.

“It’s fine babe, I’m actually about to knock out myself. Plus, it’s been a couple of days since I got to go to bed next to your pretty face. I’ve missed my baby.” Out of habit, you wrapped your hands around his neck and hid your face in the crook of his nape. The scent of fresh linen and citrus made your chest feel warm.

It was rare for Mark to do his laundry because he had no clue what he was doing. A lot of his clothes either shrunk or changed color. He didn’t know he wasn’t supposed to mix his white clothes with colors; which is why a lot of his favorite white hoodies were now bright pink. As much as he didn’t want to bother you nor did he want you having to do things that you didn’t have to, you would always do his laundry without him having to ask. You just loved doing anything to help him out because he never failed to do the same for you.

Since these last few weeks have been pretty hectic for the both of you, you didn’t really have time to see Mark nor did you get to go over to his place. Asking you to move in with him was always at the tip of his tongue, but because he was planning on going away for his undergrad, he didn’t want you to move in only for him to leave. Once he brought you in to his room, he placed you on to his bed while he took off his shirt and got ready to join you.

Even if you were in and out of sleep, and you’ve seen Mark shirtless on many occasions it didn’t stop you from blushing at the sight. He didn’t take too long to join you and pulled you close in to his body; he placed his chin on your head and cheekily brought his hand up in to his sweatshirt you were wearing, drawing random figures on your bare back. The cold touch of his fingers along your shoulder blades sent shivers down your spine and you smiled tiredly to yourself at his ministrations. This was when you were at your most serene; in your boyfriend’s arms, right about to enter dreamland.

No matter how frustrating life could get sometimes, the beautiful boy whose embrace you were in right now made everything so much better. He made all the negativity disappear. What were you going to do without him once he were to transfer colleges and be thousands of miles away from you? Mark was all you’ve known for so many years; even through all your failed and toxic relationships before the two of you became a couple, he was always there and never failed to make any unfortunate situation better.

“Y/n? Where do you see yourself in ten years?” The sudden question broke you out of your sleep induced haze and you slowly pulled out of his embrace in order to get a better look at him. You shrugged indifferently and took a few seconds to actually think about it. There was never a time in your life where Mark wasn’t around, so you knew you wanted him in your life for as long as you could have him for; that was a given. But you hardly ever had time to think about the future and what you had hoped your life would be like.

“Hmm, if I’m being honest with you, I’m actually not too sure. I’m hoping I have a decent job that I actually like. I mean, I’m spending thousands of dollars just to learn a bunch of shit I won’t remember later on, so I’d like to think I can get a job that pays enough for me to make a living off of. I also want kids, I really want children. I’ve always dreamed about having a big family. That’s all I really care about. I want five kids at the most, but I want to be able to completely afford them and be able to take care of them so we’ll just have to wait and see. What about you? And why the sudden question about the future Mark?” He lifted up your chin and placed a chaste kiss upon your lips.

“Do you see me in that future of yours?” You scoffed at the fact that he completely ignored your questions, and because he was inquiring on whether or not you wanted him to stay if your life; if he was the man you planned on settling down and spending the rest of your life with. You could’ve sworn you told him countless times that he was all you needed for the rest of your days and maybe he was just messing around with you.

“Of course I do. Even when we were kids, I knew I always wanted you around Mark. We’ve known each other for almost fourteen years, there’s no way you can get rid of me now babe. I don’t care what my future looks like, all I know is that I want you in it.” He gave you his signature cheeky grin before pulling you up against his chest.

“Good, because that’s all I want too. I want you for the rest of my life, in each and every life time.”

Winter was extremely cold this year; in fact, the local weatherman claimed that it was one of the coldest winters your town experienced in the last twenty years. Although winter was your favorite season from the time you were a little girl, the last couple of years haven’t been the best for you and you no longer felt the need to celebrate any holiday; you no longer felt the holiday spirit.

You hated that you no longer felt like decorating your place with Halloween, thanksgiving and Christmas decorations, you hated not going over to your parent’s house to celebrate and you were upset with the fact that you’d find yourself turning off any kind of Christmas song as soon as it would play on the radio. As the days got colder, so did your heart.

Two years ago, you had made so many plans for the winter break. You wanted to go ice skating with your friends, Christmas caroling with your family, snow boarding with Mark and his family and setting up a Christmas tree for the first time in your apartment. Your enthusiasm for anything and everything and just your life in general all changed once Mark went away.

Right after Mark graduated with his bachelor’s degree, he took no time in applying to all the best engineering schools all throughout the world. You were extremely supportive of anything and everything that Mark wanted to do and accomplish, which is why you tried your best to hide the fact that you were bothered with the idea of him no longer being with you. It would be selfish of you to try and stop him, but deep down you were afraid of what was going to happen to your relationship and you had every right to be.

If you knew then what you know now, you would’ve ended things with him completely before letting him play with both your heart and your mind from miles away. When he found out he got accepted to the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, you put on the fakest smile possible and threw him a congratulations party surrounded by both your families and a few of your mutual friends.

Not only was he going to college almost 4,000 miles away, but you didn’t know when the next time you were going to see him was. Mark made sure to spend every single moment up until the day he had to fly out with you and he promised you each and every day that the two of you were going to be okay. That your love was enough to withstand any amount of distance and time difference. For the first few months, it worked out perfectly. Although it would be morning where he was and night time where you were, you both made it work.

If you couldn’t face time or call one another, you made sure to send text messages to each other and made sure to update each other with how life was going. It was extremely rough; seeing him through phone and computer screens wasn’t the same as having him with you but you took what you could get. Unfortunately, only three months of being away, Mark decided that a long distance relationship was too much for him to handle.

He texted you one night and told you he couldn’t do it anymore. At first, you thought he was messing around; even if you knew deep down Mark would never joke around about something as serious as a breakup, but you didn’t want to believe he no longer wanted to be in a relationship with you. No matter how hard it was not having him around, you could handle it.

What was a couple of years away from him, especially because you knew he’d come home to visit during the holidays, knowing that you were planning on spending the rest of your life with him? Something had to be up; there was no way he could give up on your relationship that easily. You begged and pleaded with him to genuinely think about what he was asking for; you called many times to the point where you felt as if he would block you. You tried reaching out to him on social media and you cried for the entire night. Hell, that entire week for you was filled with multiple bottles of red wine and hundreds of tissues on your kitchen floor.

Right after sending that message and giving you one word responses, he stopped contacting you altogether. You’ve had your heart broken a couple of times; but nothing compared to the pain you felt when you came to the realization that Mark was no longer going to be in your life. Not only were you in the middle of losing your boyfriend, you were also losing your best friend and even if things were to settle down and you were to move on; if that were even possible, there was no way you could ever be friends with him again. Not when he practically ripped your heart out right out of your chest and stepped on it like it was nothing; like you were nothing.

You screamed, cried and even broke a couple of things that he either owned or gave to you. You even had to quit your job and take a year off of school because you weren’t in the right mind to do anything. Losing Mark was a pain you didn’t think you would ever experience because of how well things were going between the two of you. Where did it all go wrong? Everything seemed to be fine just a few days prior to his heartbreaking messages.

When did he decide that he no longer wanted to commit to you and your relationship? You stayed away from everyone you knew; your family, your friends, some classmates you’d talk to every now and then and even some of your coworkers. Not only were you unable to get out of bed every morning, but you could no longer think or feel nor did you have the energy to eat anything. To some outsiders, you’d be considered pathetic. Why would you let something so silly like a break up wreck your entire life? You had so much going for you; why would you allow a boy to do that to you?

But then again, Mark wasn’t just any ordinary boy. He was the love of your life, your safe haven, your best friend. He’s all you’ve ever known and wanted to know for the rest of your life. A month after the breakup, you finally allowed yourself to get out of bed and out of your apartment. It was difficult, but you knew that moping around wouldn’t do you any good. You even began to let your friends in family back in to your life. Since you didn’t want anyone pitying you or worrying about your mental and physical health, you decided to keep the breakup to yourself.

If anybody found out; which you were sure some of your mutual friends would, then you’d let them know that it was okay even if you were on the verge of a mental breakdown almost every single day. When your friends BamBam and Yugyeom came over to spend time with you, Yugyeom made the mistake in blurting our that Mark was seeing someone. If you thought the breakup was already bad enough, hearing that Mark was in a relationship not too long after your breakup felt like a stab to both your back and your heart. It made you wonder, was he cheating on you?

Did he realize that there were other women out there that he could actually be around? Was he that lonely that he needed love from anyone he could get possible? Did he really give up thirteen years of a friendship and relationship for someone he probably just met? It made you question so many different things and brought up so many insecurities. Did he fall out of love with you and if so, when? Was everything he told you months before he left a lie?

Did you really mean that little to him that he didn’t care what would happen to the two of you? You hated him. Never in your life did you would be without Mark. Even before the two of you started dating, you’d always plan out your futures together and he’s told you on multiple occasions that he wanted your houses right next door to each other’s so he could see you every day. You wanted to fly up to Massachusetts and punch him in the face, but what good would that do?

It wouldn’t bring him back to you; wouldn’t change his mind about his decision. If he really loved you, you would’ve been the only girl he’d see himself with and the thought of dating someone else would kill him. If he wanted a break to focus on school, then you’d give it to him. But now, knowing that he was in a relationship with someone else, you wanted nothing more than to remove him completely from your life and you did—or at least tried to.

For the next two years, you were in and out of relationships and at one point, you gave up on any sort of relationship whether it was sexual or platonic completely. Nobody could ever compare to Mark and the way he loved you. Nor would you be able to love anyone or care for anyone the way you did with Mark. He had a hold on your heart; his name, his memories, his touch, his kisses, his handsome face and kind-hearted personality would be forever tattooed on your soul and you didn’t think they would ever be removed anytime soon.

It was almost 2 in the morning and you were sitting on your couch watching reruns of Friends. For some odd reason, you couldn’t find it in yourself to fall asleep. Normally, you’d be exhausted from both work and school, especially because you were taking up extra classes to make up for the semester you took off. However, you’ve been trying for hours to get your well deserved rest and just accepted the fact that sleep would find you when your entire body was ready to do so.

As much as you loved the show, it no longer made you laugh like it used to and it was probably because it was both your’s and Mark’s favorite show to watch together. In fact, you went through all ten seasons in less than a month to the point where you memorize many of the lines. This episode in particular was one of your favorites. Not only was it extremely funny, but Mark even re-enacted the scene where Joey goes and puts on multiple layers of Chandler’s outfits.

It’s been a while since you thought of Mark and thankfully your friends knew not to bring him up, but as the episode went on you couldn’t help but wonder how he was doing. Luckily on most days, you were too caught up in both your studies and your work to even think about him but now that you had free time, your curiosity was getting the best of you. How was he doing? Did he already graduate from college? Was he still dating that girl? Did he have plans on staying in Massachusetts?

You released a frustrated grunt and changed the episode; you couldn’t handle the over thinking and you were sure you’d end up not getting any sleep at all if you continued wondering about your ex-boyfriend. One more episode later and you found yourself finally falling asleep. Before you could completely drift off though, there was a soft knock on your front door that caught your attention.

At first you just assumed your mind was playing tricks on you and that you were hallucinating, but the knocking continued for a few moments and although you hated being rude, whoever was outside must have known what time it was so they should already know there was a huge chance you were sleeping. When the doorbell rang, you released an exasperated sigh and took a couple of moments to get in touch with reality before getting up and making your way to see who was so desperate for your attention at such an ungodly hour.

You had a feeling it was either BamBam or Jackson on one of their drunken stupors; this wouldn’t be the first time they showed up on your porch drunk off their asses. You never understood why they’d come over to your house out of all places at at one point you felt that they were secretly giving your address to their Uber drivers because they could trust you to take care of them. Since you were so out of it, you didn’t take the time to look in the peephole and as soon as you opened your door to see who it was, you really wish you did.

It’s been over two years since you last saw or heard from him and you’ve tried your best to completely push the thought of him and your many years together to the back of your mind. If you were exhausted before opening the door, you were wide awake now and without even thinking, you attempted to slam the door out of reaction to seeing him again. However, Mark had faster reflexes and pushed the door before you could close it entirely.

Everything was happening so fast and your mind was still trying to process his presence. What was he doing there? When did he get back home? Why was he at your place so early in the morning? How did he know where you lived? You weren’t sure what kind of expression you had on your face, but you knew you probably didn’t look too pleased to see him.

But it was only natural and what did he expect after what he did to you? For you to welcome him with open arms as if the last two years didn’t exist? Did he really forget the kind of person you were? During your relationship, he knew you weren’t a force to be reckoned with whether or not he was your boyfriend so now that he was standing outside on your porch for God knows what reason, he had to know that you no longer wanted anything to do with him.

“Y/n—“

“Don’t start with me. What the hell are you doing here Mark?”

Seeing him after two years was pulling both your heart and mind in to multiple directions. You were so confused. Your mind wanted him gone, away from you and your house but your heart wanted nothing more than to invite him inside and see what he was there for. It was if Mark aged backwards; if anything, he looked even younger and more handsome than the last night you saw him and you despised the fact that he was having such a strong effect on your heart. You might have thought you hated him before, but that was because he wasn’t around for you to really feel anything towards him.

Seeing him after two years of being away from him was slowly driving you insane. Why did he have to come back after practically ruining your entire life? It was like he was really out to wreck your entire being. Like he got off of being the reason behind your destruction. When he brought his hand up to the back of his neck and scratched it out of habit, you let out a laugh of disbelief. You’ve known him for more than half of your life; you knew what each and every one of his ministrations meant.

He was either nervous, worried or both. You caught on to this habit the first time he took you out on a date. Even if he’s known you and your family for so long, he was so afraid to ask your dad for permission to date his little girl. He scratched the back of his neck every time your dad brought up having you home by 10 that night and to not even think about taking things further than a peck on the cheek. At the time it was the cutest thing ever but thinking about the memory now made your stomach sore.

“I uh—I’m sorry for bothering you and I know you’re probably going to freak out when I tell you this—but I—I made a huge mistake in breaking up with you and I’m so fucking sorry y/n.” It was if time froze in that moment. You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. He regrets the breakup and he’s sorry? It’s been over two years, why all of a sudden did he think it was okay for him to come back after all the heartbreak he put you through? What did he expect was going to happen?

Did he think you’d welcome him back with open arms and start off from where the two of you ended things? Life didn’t work out that way. He couldn’t have you when it was beneficial for him and what was really upsetting you, was knowing that there was a chance you’d allow him to fix things. Mark never did any wrong in your eyes even if he practically ruined your entire being. When he first ended your relationship, you wanted to believe he had a good reason as to why he did so. You just couldn’t believe his shit excuse of a reason and after hearing that he got in to another relationship, it just answered your many questions.

If this was under different circumstances, you’d slap him right across of his face for even thinking he had a right to be at your house right now giving you poor apology. The laugh that fell from your lips both confused and worried Mark. It was obvious that your breakup had a huge toll on you. You lost over twenty pounds, you no longer put effort in to your appearance and you just looked more fragile and broken and Mark never hated himself more than he did in that moment knowing this was all his fault. He didn’t mean for things to go this far; couples broke up all the time but it just showed him how much he must’ve meant to you.

“That’s a joke right? You’re fucking with me right now—look Mark I don’t have time for this bullshit right now I have work in the morning. I’m tired and I made a pact with myself to never get involved with you ever again. You can take your apology and shove it up your ass.”

You weren’t a stranger to seeing Mark cry; he cried the night before he left at the thought of not getting to see you anymore. He cried every now and then when school got too much for him to handle, he cried during Christopher Robin when Pooh couldn’t find his friends, he cried when his grandmother passed away and although the two of you hardly ever fought, there were some arguments that caused him to tear up.

But you weren’t expecting to see him get all worked up over your breakup especially because he was the one to initiate it and because it’s been so long. Unfortunately, you could feel your heart growing heavy at his defeated posture and as much as you wanted to keep up your angry facade, it just didn’t feel right to be so harsh towards him. Even after all the negativity he put you through mentally and physically.

“Mark—“

“I know. I shouldn’t be here. I know it’s probably too late and I’m completely aware that you hate me. I can’t blame you, I’d hate me too. There aren’t any excuses for what I did to you and for everything you had to suffer through because of me and I don’t know what made me come here tonight I just—fuck. I’ve missed you so much y/n. I know that’s going to be hard to believe, especially because we’ve been broken up for over two years now but I need you to understand that these last two years without you, on top of the four months we were still together while I was away were the worst years of my life. There aren’t enough words to describe how sorry I am and how much I hate myself for giving up on us so easily. I thought about you every single day. I wondered how you were doing, if our breakup affected you in any way, if you missed me the way I couldn’t stop missing you, if you moved on, if you finally graduated. I know it was my fault that I no longer knew anything and the guys—they refused to update me on anything. Hell, they stopped contacting me and I only ever heard from them if I started the conversation first.”

You released a snicker before crossing your arms in frustration. One thing that was so convenient about your relationship with Mark was that you had the same circle of friends. It was easier that way. Although Mark knew of them first and he was the reason why you became friends with them, they always seemed to show favoritism towards you. You were like a younger sister to them and you saw them practically every single day.

In fact, they were the reasons why you didn’t end up losing yourself completely after Mark ended things with you. Jackson and BamBam made sure that you were eating and drinking enough liquids to keep your body from becoming malnourished. Jinyoung tried his best to help you with your studies so that you wouldn’t fail and Jaebeom even stayed with you at your apartment to keep you company. Honestly, you don’t know what you did to deserve any of them, but you were extremely grateful for all that they’ve done for you. It wasn’t surprising to hear that they were so hostile towards him.

The minute Jinyoung saw his post about his new girlfriend, he wanted to get on the next plane to Massachusetts and knock some sense in to him. He, along with the rest of your friends saw how much damage the breakup caused you and they hated that he did such an unexpected thing to you.

“Do they know you’re back? How long have you been back for? Is that why you came to see me? Are you here to stay permanently? Is that why you came here to try and apologize? Did you think I was going to forget about everything I had to go through when you broke up with me? You were a fucking coward Mark. You couldn’t even break up with me over the phone, you texted me such a pathetic excuse—what? Did you think that I would take you back so quickly because of our past together? Because we’ve known each other for so long and been through so much together? Did you think I wouldn’t hear about your relationship? From what I heard, you seemed to really like her. So what happened? Did the thrill expire? You got to experience other women and came to the conclusion that it wasn’t what you wanted? Do you know just how much shit you put me through once you decided you no longer wanted to be with me? I blamed myself for our breakup. You made me feel like I wasn’t good enough for you. That I wasn’t worth waiting for. Are you not man enough to handle a long distance relationship? Couldn’t handle not having your dick wet for more than a few months? I’m not who I used to be Mark. You ruined me. You broke me. I don’t know what you expected after coming here tonight, but I have no intention on taking you back.”

The longer you watched him react to your words, you could feel a stab to your chest at each quiver of his lip and furrow of his brow. You hated that you could see the twelve year old boy you developed a crush on all those years ago in his eyes. You hated that you felt sorry for him. He probably went through a lot to find out where you lived and you were mentally cursing whoever gave him your address. But if he went through all that trouble especially if he knew he’d probably get shit from your friends for trying to look for you, you had to give him credit for that.

“I—I shouldn’t have come. I’m sorry y/n. I’ll leave. I just—She was a mistake—and our relationship didn’t last long. I know—you probably don’t want to hear it. She just helped fill the void of your absence and I didn’t even like her. She just took my mind off of the distance. She gave me the attention you never failed to give me. I meant for it to be just a friendship and I didn’t break up with you to be with her. I couldn’t handle being away from you and if I could go back in the past, I would’ve stayed and went to college here. I would’ve done anything to keep our relationship what it was. You were—you are the best thing that ever happened to me y/n. Hell, I’d prevent the breakup from happening if I could. I don’t expect anything from you, I really don’t. But I’m still so in love with you and I probably always will be. You’re my soulmate y/n. It took this breakup for me to realize that there’s nobody else for me in this entire world. It’s you. You’re it for me and I’m so mad at myself for not realizing how lucky I was to have you until I fucked it all up and lost you. Even if you decide that there’s no chance for me to come back in to your life. Goodnight y/n. Take care.”

You don’t know what came over you, but seeing him walk away hurt more than the actual breakup itself. You remembered having to go in to therapy because of how the breakup messed with your head. The thought of having to seek therapy because of something you considered to be so stupid made you feel pathetic. Your therapist was a very kind and soft-spoken older woman. She did her best to help you with moving on and had you do all kinds of things to take your mind off of Mark and what could’ve been.

However, the only thing you could’ve done without was how she would indirectly tell you that you were too young to know what love was. To know what heartbreak was. She insinuated that you were too young to really know what a real heartbreak felt like and that you were a fool for letting someone like Mark ruin you but she didn’t know anything other than what you told her.

She didn’t know how Mark was your best friend before he was your boyfriend. She didn’t know how he made you feel as if you were the most beautiful and most important person in the entire world. She didn’t know that you spent almost your entire life with him by your side. She didn’t know what your relationship was like and how you were willing to give up anything and everything in your possession if it meant getting to spend the rest of your life with him. Who was she to say you were too young to know what love actually was? How old did you have to be to know what love was?

You fell in love with Mark before you learned algebra. You fell in love with him before you knew what love even was, but he made it known that he reciprocated those same feelings for you. The two of you were only fourteen when you realized that your feelings for Mark were more than what one should feel for their best friend, but you weren’t all that young to realize the effect Mark had on your heart. The sudden memory of your therapy sessions made you want to let him continue walking away; you meant it when you said you no longer wanted anything to do with him and that he was in your past and you had every intention in keeping him there. But you’d be lying to yourself if you said you didn’t still love him.

No matter how much you wanted to hate him and how long it’s been since he’s been gone, you could never forget your first love. Nor could you let that many years of a friendship go down the drain even if he did it so easily. You’ve always felt like you loved Mark more than he loved you, but that was only because you’d say it more than he did. Mark was never a man of words, he was a man of actions and he never failed to show you he loved you with his actions. He didn’t have to come here tonight; he could’ve left things just the way they were. He didn’t have to say it, you knew he still loved you, which is why you weren’t surprised when you called out his name right before he could completely be out of sight.

“It’s late. I don’t want you driving right now. It’s dangerous. You can—sleep on the couch.” The small smirk that rose on his face didn’t go unnoticed by you, even if he tried to cover it up as soon as he did it and it made your heart leap at the sight. You were a fool for the beautiful man in front of you and although it would take a while for you to forgive him, you were willing to see where things were going to go between you both. If he were to come back months ago, you probably would’ve gave in to him the minute you opened the door but because you were stronger now, you were going to let your mind make the decisions for you.

“It’s fine y/n. Thank you for the offer, but I don’t think it’s a good idea—“

“Neither do I, but there’s a tiny voice inside my head telling me to ask you to stay. I won’t force you to, and don’t think that this means anything. But the offers there on the table if you want it.”

You walked back in to your house and didn’t even see whether or not he was following behind you; but once you heard footsteps on your wooden floor as the door closed, you released a sigh of relief.

“Nice place—when did you buy it?” You shrugged indifferently as you prepared the couch for him to sleep on.

“Five months ago. Jaebeom actually lived with me for a while but I accidentally kissed him one night when I was drunk off of my ass and we decided that it was best for our friendship that he lived somewhere else.”

Although you weren’t looking at him, you were sure he probably wasn’t too happy to hear about you and Jaebeom. Mark was an extremely jealous, overprotective and possessive boyfriend. During your relationship, he was very vocal about how he didn’t like that Jackson would be so touchy towards you and how he didn’t like the way BamBam would try and hold your hand even if it was all in good fun. He also made it known that he was jealous of your friendship with Jaebeom because he felt as if the younger boy harbored feelings for you.

Mark might have been your boyfriend, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t develop feelings for anyone else and he was afraid of losing you to his friend. When you turned around to see his reaction, you smiled softly to yourself once you saw his clenched fists and tightened jaw. You wanted him to feel what you felt the minute you found out he was seeing someone knew. You loved how jealous Mark could get; it proved how much he loved you and how afraid he was to lose you.

“How did you even find out where I live? I’m sure none of the guys told you. They know not to even if I didn’t say anything. I didn’t think you’d come back home and even if you did, I didn’t think you’d want anything to do with me anyway.” He took a seat on your couch and you couldn’t help but imagine what life would’ve been like if the two of you stuck together. You never voiced your thoughts to him about living together, but there were times when you’d stay over at his apartment and your heart would crave getting to go to sleep next to him instead of having to go back to your apartment each morning you stayed the night before.

You couldn’t get over how much he fit in with everything and you soon grew curious about what living with him would be like but it was too late for you to crave for or even think about things like that. You didn’t want to make the situation more awkward than it already was, so you took a seat at your makeshift bar in the kitchen to give yourself a good amount of distance away from him.

“Your mom gave it to me. I was hesitant on even trying to get in touch with her, but I needed to find you. I needed to talk to you. I came here as soon as I landed. I didn’t even think about the consequences or the fact that you didn’t want to see me. I needed to see you again. Your mom talked to me as if nothing was wrong and she told me to tell you that we should gather with our families and have dinner together. Did you not tell her about us?” You shook your head and refused to look at him in case he were to give you an expression you weren’t ready for.

“I don’t know why, but I had a gut feeling that you were going to come back to me one day; or at least I hoped and I prayed that you would. I didn’t want to ruin her opinion of you. My mom thinks the world of you Mark. If she were to find out what you put me through, she would’ve cut off all ties with you and made sure I’d never talk to you again. You know she is. You saw how she was with all my exes and a few of my friends. I was afraid of her doing the same with you and I don’t know why. You deserve it, but I don’t know I guess my heart just wanted to believe that one day you’d come to your senses and realize that you still loved me. It fucking sucked every single time she brought you up in a conversation and talked about us getting married not knowing that we were no longer a couple. Sometimes I forgot that I kept lying to her and it almost slipped that I haven’t talked to you in years. I’m surprised your mom didn’t tell her, they go out for lunch one a week.”

“I didn’t tell my mom either. I didn’t think it was anyone else’s business but our own. I knew shit would go down if she knew, and I didn’t want her pestering you while I wasn’t there to stop her. Wait, so—you um—do you still—can you see us getting back together again? I have no right in asking you such a stupid question but you must still want me if you have yet to tell your mom.”

Honestly, you didn’t know how to respond. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t miss him and that you didn’t want to rekindle your relationship. But that was before he showed up tonight asking you for forgiveness. And you knew you’d never be able to forget what he did even if you did forgive him. Looking at him, you knew you still loved him but you weren’t too sure if you wanted to give him another chance. You’ve worked so hard to get to where you were mentally. Were you really going to let months of therapy, drinking multiple bottles of red wine and finding yourself in bars and clubs trying to get over him go to waste?

Instead of responding, you made your way to your room to get him some clothes and to give yourself a minute to process the entire situation. You still couldn’t believe that he was there in your house sitting on your couch nor could you even fathom the fact that you were allowing him to stay. What had gotten in to you? If any of your friends were to find out what you were doing, they would be extremely disappointed.

There was a time that the guys would fight over who would be the best man at your wedding and everyone knew that the two of you were practically made for one another. However, as soon as Mark made the decision to end your relationship, all of your friends looked at him in a different light. If he handle the break up the right way and explained himself, then maybe they would be a little more understanding. He made things even worse when he jumped into another relationship making it seem as if the breakup didn’t phase him at all.

When you reentered the living room and handed him the sweats and a baggy t-shirt, he quietly thanked you before immediately taking off his shirt. You turned around to prevent yourself from looking at him; during your relationship you would always find yourself staring at your boyfriend in disbelief. For someone with such a skinny frame, he had a nice physique and over the years, he became even more built and if you could see how defined his biceps were with a shirt on, you wouldn’t be able to control yourself when he took it off.

Although you were mad at him and just this entire situation, you were only human and Mark was always the most attractive man in your eyes. His soft chuckle did wonders on your heart and once you turned around, you wanted to slap the cocky smirk that was now on his face.

“What’s so funny?” He shrugged.

“I don’t know why you’re so shy, it’s nothing you haven’t seen before.” You playfully rolled your eyes at his comment although, if you had the choice you would definitely continue looking.

“Whatever. Goodnight Mark. My room is right down the hall if you need me. But, try not to.” You began returning to your room until you heard him whisper something you were sure you wouldn’t have heard if you took a few more steps.

“Please don’t give up on us.” You decided not to make it known that you heard him and that his words were making a mess of your mind the longer they repeated in your head. He was right; it was a bad idea to ask him to stay over.

He hasn’t even been in your house for half an hour and you were already on the verge of crying. This was all too much for you to take in and you were afraid of what was going to happen in the morning. Your heart was racing a mile a minute and your mind was filled with thoughts of Mark and everything the two of you have been through. Thankfully, it didn’t take too long for sleep to take over and soon you were off in dreamland.

“Mark—get over here! Ugh, it was the guys’ idea to come out tonight and they’re the ones who got you piss drunk so why am I having to suffer trying to take care of you?”

Today was the last day of finals and to celebrate, Jackson suggested the eight of you go out drinking. You should’ve tried harder to coerce Mark in to staying home, but the older boy needed this well deserved break just like the rest of his friends did. Since he took his last final today, you knew he wanted to relax and let loose and who better to celebrate with than your girlfriend and your six best friends? Anyone who knew your boyfriend was completely aware of how much of a lightweight he was.

Drink after drink, your friends; Jackson and BamBam in particular kept sending beers and shots of vodka Mark’s way and before any of you could think about the negative outcome of Mark taking down soju bombs, his high pitch laughter echoed throughout the bar and you felt embarrassed when you saw practically everyone’s eyes turn towards your table. Mark would not stop laughing to the top of his lungs. This always happened whenever the older boy had a little too much to drink. Normally he was good with his alcohol intake but tonight was a whole other story.

He didn’t want to seem like a weakling in front of the guys and that’s why you hated going out with your friends whenever alcohol was involved. Jackson and BamBam were infamous for talking the rest of the guys in to drinking till they threw up and because Mark never backed down from a challenge, it normally got him in to a lot of trouble. You decided that it was time for the two of you to go home and when you asked the guys for help, they immediately brought Mark outside and said their goodbyes, but none of them offered to take him home.

However, they were all pretty drunk off of their asses and you were sure they only invited you out because they knew Mark would get home safely with you around. One of the only things you could do without when it came to Mark was how clumsy and touchy he could get when he was plastered. You called for a taxi and tried your best to hold him up but he kept tripping on nothing and he even ended up falling to the ground and pulling you with him.

“Mark! What the hell?!”

“Shit I’m sorry baby—why are we on the floor y/n it’s dirty—“ Once all the guys were to get over their hangovers, you knew they wouldn’t hear the end of it. Mark was leaving in less than a month and this was not the way you wanted to spend your last few days with him.

“I love you y/n. I love you so much—y/nnnnn—you’re so beautiful baby—so pretty—I love youuuuuu-“ You couldn’t help but giggle no matter how frustrated you were with him; he was such a child at heart and it was even more prominent every time he would drink.

“Mark, stop. You’re drunk.”

“And you’re extremely sexy—what? I’m just stating facts. Baby, say it back. Tell me you love me.”

“Mark—“

“Please. I need you to say that you love me. Don’t forget about me when I leave—please. I’ve been debating on leaving for the longest time—I can’t lose you y/n—you—you’re all—everything—all that I need—to me.”

His words were slurred, but each word sent a pang of hurt to your chest. He sounded so genuine and even if there was a chance he wouldn’t remember anything in the morning, you knew there was no way you would ever forget the gut wrenching look in his eyes as he begged you not to give up on him. Instead of answering; especially because you were so close to crying at his heartfelt words, you pulled him in to a fleeting kiss.

Although all you could taste on his lips was the cheap tequila and salt that was on the rim of his shot glass, you found yourself melting at the sensation of his soft lips against yours. This kiss was different than most of the ones shared between the two of you. While most of his kisses were rough and passionate; as if the world were to end and he needed to prove to you how much he loved you each and every single time, this kiss was softer, gentler in a way you were quite used to.

Especially because Mark’s dominant side came out whenever he was under the influence but you weren’t complaining. It’s as if you could feel what he wanted to say through the kiss. To your dismay, he pulled away right as he began shoving his tongue down your throat and the whimper that fell from your lips made him giggle in to the crook of your neck.

“I wanna show you exactly what you mean to me. Tonight. Are you alright with that?” If this was any other time, you would’ve said no although sex with Mark whenever one of you were drunk was always such a fun and wild experience. Even more so when both of you had a little too much to drink; but because the time for him to leave was just right around the corner, you wanted to have him to yourself as much as you possibly could. You nodded against his chest and leaned your cheek right against his heart.

“Hearts are a funny thing don’t you think? Some people say hearts are the reason why we’re alive, but that’s because they haven’t met you. You’re the reason for my existence baby, don’t you dare forget it.” You playfully rolled your eyes and scoffed as you tightened your grip around his lower back.

“How is it that you’re drunk as hell yet so fucking cheesy. Only you Mark Tuan.” He gave you a wide grin before letting you out from his embrace and tipsily running in to the street. Your eyes practically jumped out of your head at his sudden movement and you made your way towards him. How could someone have so much energy with all that alcohol in their system?

“Mark, get over here! Are you crazy?”

“Yeah, crazy for you! Dance with me y/n.” As silly as he looked, flailing his arms back and forth like a bird, you didn’t want to have to end up in the emergency room because of his drunken antics. He was quick to pout when you tugged at his wrist and pulled him back in to the sidewalk, but he allowed you to do so. Mark might have not been completely there, but he knew not to upset you. Finally after what felt like hours, the taxi driver pulled up to you and your boyfriend and you all but gently forced Mark in to the taxi.

As you gave the driver directions back to Mark’s apartment and helped buckle him in, he rested his head on your shoulder. He intertwined your fingers together and stole a chaste kiss from the corner of your mouth while murmuring a quiet apology against your lips. Once the driver dropped you both off to Mark’s apartment structure, it took you almost fifteen minutes to drag him up to his unit.

He fell asleep not too long after you drove off from the bar and you released the longest sigh of relief as soon as you opened his door. You continued the trek to his room and plopped him on to the bed with intentions of changing out of your dress.

So much for drunk sex.

You tried your best to remove your make up and change in to one of his shirts as fast as you possibly could in order to make sure he was still breathing, but you had nothing to worry about when you walked back in to his room. He was out like a light. You decided to leave him be, he’d just have to deal with his hungover state once he woke up in the morning. You turned off the lights and found your place next to him.

Out of habit, you pulled him in to your body and left soft kisses along his face. These last few weeks have been some of the hardest weeks of your entire life and you tried to lie to yourself thinking it was because of school. But deep down you knew it was because Mark was leaving. There was nothing you could say or do to stop him; well, you knew if you were to ask him to stay he would. However, you wouldn’t be able to live with yourself knowing you were the reason Mark didn’t get to follow and achieve his dreams.

“I’m not going anywhere Mark. I’m yours. Forever.” Not too long after that dream, more memories from your past with Mark began popping up in your mind; but why now? It wasn’t like you’ve never dreamt about him since the breakup, but it seemed as if your heart was trying to pressure you in to taking him back. Memories of your first date and how Mark sneaking stole a kiss from your lips as the two of you were eating ice cream to the first time you made love with one another replayed over and over and you wanted to scream.

You could still hear him whispering sweet nothings in to your ear while he loved on each and every one of your body parts. You could still remember the way he would touch you as if you were a masterpiece. He never failed to make you feel like the most beautiful and ethereal human being in the entire world with just his touch alone. The next dream was one that you had no memory of and you couldn’t put your finger to where you were.

All you saw were white walls and a bunch of balloons tied to flower baskets. It was then that you heard a soft cry of a baby and when you looked down, there was the most breathtaking little infant in your hands. As you caressed the baby’s cheek, you felt someone running their fingers through your hair and when you looked up, you saw Mark looking at you with so much love and adoration in his eyes.

This was all you ever wanted from the beginning of your relationship with Mark. To settle down and start a family with him. To have little Marks or mini versions of yourself running around your house. To go on family trips, have family game nights and spend as much time with your little family. As quickly as that dream came, it went with a snap of your finger.

This last dream was more of a nightmare and although you were fast asleep, you remembered this memory as if it was yesterday. Dropping off Mark to the airport. It had to be one of the worst days of your life. Not only did the car ride feel extremely long, but as soon as you walked with his family and your group of friends to his gate, you felt like you were going to throw up.

“Hey, don’t cry y/n. I’ll be back. In the mean time baby, take good care of yourself for me please? God, what am I going to do without you? I love you y/n. I love you, I love you, I love you. I’ll call you as soon as I land. I expect five pictures a day of your beautiful self. It won’t be long until you’re back in my arms again. Until then baby.”

That was the last time you shared a kiss together; the last time you hugged him and felt his warm embrace. The arms that once were your home was now just a memory. As you watched him walk through security, the cries fell from the back of your throat and you didn’t even realize you sank to your knees until BamBam and Jinyoung joined you on the ground.

You stood up and attempted to run towards him, but soon the dream changed and you were in the dark. You couldn’t see anything and you felt so scared. This is what your life felt like without Mark. Scary. Pitch black. Empty. Unnerving.

You ran in circles and began screaming; however, you were no longer dreaming and it became adamant that you were now wide awake and so was the man who was haunting your dreams. Feeling his hands grip at your arms as he started to shake you felt foreign. It’s been so long since he’s touched you, and this wasn’t exactly what you had in mind when you’d think about having Mark’s hands on you again. You couldn’t see him, nor could you hear him but you were sure he was yelling and trying to break you out of your little breakdown.

“Y/n, hey, wake up y/n. Y/n, it’s just a dream. Shhhh, it’s okay. I’m here, shhh—come here.” You didn’t have the strength or energy to push him away and allowed him to pick you up and rock you back and forth. Since you were still in such a haze, you didn’t even feel the gentle kiss he left on your forehead but you knew that you loved being back in his arms and you were sure you’d allow him to hold you even if you came to your senses.

After a couple of moments and giving yourself the chance to recollect your thoughts, you sat up and got off from his lap; making your way back to your previous spot in bed. You turned around to face him yet you couldn’t look directly at him. He’d know what you were probably freaking out over just by the expression in your eyes and you refused to let him know that he was still on your mind even after all this time.

The two of you sat in silence for a few minutes; you had nothing to say yet Mark wanted to spill everything. He wanted you to know how much he regrets leaving you, how he wishes he just stayed back if it meant the two of you would still be together, how hearing you scream made his heart sink to his chest and how he didn’t hesitate to run in and check to see if you were okay even if you were to push him away.

“Are you—are you okay?” When you didn’t say anything, he took that as his sign to leave but right as he began to stand up, you did the unthinkable. It was probably your heart acting for you, but as soon as you felt his lips melding in to yours, you felt your body go up in flames. He didn’t hesitate to kiss back as soon as you brought your lips up to his and he was quick to bring you on to his lap as if the two of weren’t apart for the last two years.

His lips felt foreign yet all too familiar and you allowed yourself to continue giving in to him. There weren’t any red flags going off in your mind as you thought there would be and you knew that this time was different. Those dreams awoken something inside of you. After getting to experience what your future with Mark would be like, you didn’t want to spend a future with anyone else other than the beautiful man who was currently kissing you as if his life depended on it.

It was going to take a while for you to forgive him, but you were willing to give him another chance. It was Mark for crying out loud. You would do anything he asked of you, no matter how stubborn and prideful you were. He pulled away when he felt things were getting too heavy and placed his forehead against yours. You both took some time to catch your breath and he placed his forehead against yours while reaching for your hand.

“Y/n—“

“No. Not right now. We’ll talk in the morning. I want to go back to sleep.”

He nodded in understanding and allowed you to climb off of his lap. He brushed some of your hair back and gently pinched your cheek as a sign of affection that he used to do to you all the time. Since he didn’t know what you were feeling or thinking in that moment, he intended to make his way back in to the living room but you had other plans. When he felt you reach for his hand and pulled him back in to bed with you, he couldn’t stop the cheeky smile that rose on his face and you wanted nothing more than to kiss that stupid smile away.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“I thought you’d want to be alone.” You let out a quick scoff before wrapping your arms around his neck and leaving a soft kiss on his jaw.

“Well you thought wrong asshole. Don’t go.” His laughter echoed throughout the room causing butterflies to erupt in your tummy. You knew when the guys were to find out what had happened tonight that there was a chance they’d be upset with you, but you didn’t care. Everyone and their mothers knew just how much Mark meant to you and you’d be stupid to push him out of your life forever. You’d sort things out in the morning but for right now, you were going to allow things to progress with the two of you. This was the first time in years that you felt safe and genuinely happy right before you went to sleep and you knew it had everything to do with Mark. As your eyes began to close, his last few words made your heart flutter.

“You have nothing to worry about baby. I’m here to stay.”

But I knew you Playing hide-and-seek and Giving me your weekends I, I knew you Your heartbeat on the High Line Once in twenty lifetimes, I And when I felt like I was an old cardigan under someone's bed You put me on and said I was your favorite To kiss in cars and downtown bars Was all we needed You drew stars around my scars But now I'm bleeding 'Cause I knew you Stepping on the last train Marked me like a bloodstain, I I knew you Tried to change the ending Peter losing Wendy I, I knew you Leaving like a father Running like water, I When you are young, they assume you know nothing But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs The smell of smoke would hang around this long 'Cause I knew everything when I was young I knew I'd curse you for the longest time Chasing shadows in the grocery line I knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired And you'd be standing in my front porch light And I knew you'd come back to me You'd come back to me And you'd come back to me And you'd come back And when I felt like I was an old cardigan under someone's bed You put me on and said I was your favorite

#got7 imagines #got7 #mark tuan #got7 mark #mark tuan imagines

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raleighcarrera · 4 years

Text

lonely

ride or die | colt kaneko x mc (ellie wheeler)

he never expected to have to do any of this by himself.

for @choicesoctoberchallenge2020 day 18 (lost)

tags: @choicesarehard ; @lovehugsandcandy ; @pixeljazzy ; @beccadavenport ; @zigtheeortega

~3.5k words | T

the reality is that being king of los angeles isn’t easy. it’s hard work -- late hours and long nights spent doing things he isn’t proud of and things he is kind of proud of but knows he shouldn’t be.

for as long as he could remember, colt knew he’d take over the operation, one day. kaneko autobody had been in his family for generations and the job was in his blood; he expected to step into the legacy his father left behind and have it fit like a glove.

he never thought it would feel like it actually does, exhausting and unfamiliar and weighty all at once.

he never thought it’d all fall into his lap so suddenly. and as things started to shift around him, falling apart and reforming into strange pieces with jagged edges -- things he’d always wanted but presented in a way he never thought he’d have to receive them -- colt had started to assume that he wouldn’t have to handle it all alone.

but that was his mistake. he probably should have known better than to ever get his hopes up.

maybe his dad was right, and he wasn’t cut out for this. no matter how hard he tried to be as ruthless as possible, he couldn’t stop that soft spot he tried to repress from aching whenever he thought about her. he couldn’t help but to feel lonely -- to want.

as dumb as it probably was, he’d expected her to be by his side. and maybe it hurt so badly not to have ellie there because he knew better -- she was a tourist, after all. she was never going to hang back with the crew and let him ruin her life. whatever was going on between them had always had an expiration date.

but that part of him he couldn’t switch off had grown hopeful that things would be different.

not that he’d ever said as much to ellie. and she’d left, anyway, so it wasn’t like it mattered, anymore.

she hadn’t even hesitated. she never looked back.

if it had been anyone else, he would have written them off instantly. there were plenty of people that were completely dead to colt for a variety of reasons, some minor and some catastrophic. he’d taken revenge more times than he could count on people who’d done a lot less than what ellie had.

so why couldn’t he force himself to forget about her?

why couldn’t he stop himself from thinking -- wondering -- hoping? when was it going to end?

it should have been easy to turn on her. they barely knew each other. he was a fucking idiot for thinking he loved her after spending a couple of months working together, he knew that much. the dumbest part of it all was how he thought she’d meant it when she’d said those three ridiculous words back to him.

none of it mattered, in the end -- the cars they’d stolen, everything they’d pulled off together, the magic they’d made. she’d still turned right around and left.

maybe it would be easier to let her go if she didn’t insist on worming her way back into his life whenever she got the chance.

ellie’s freshman year flew by in a blink. she didn’t come home for thanksgiving, or christmas, and he put his head down and worked until he was exhausted -- until he’d fulfilled his promise to his dad’s memory and channeled his unbridled anger into the destruction he’d rightfully assumed would feel so satisfying to finally have.

the only hollow note was not being able to share it with her, for all she’d been through, too.

but she probably didn’t care about any of it as much as he did. she’d probably long forgotten her wild senior year in favor of an exciting new place to be and interesting new people to meet, people who had shit in common with her -- not real shit, like he did, but stupid, make-believe shit that she pretended to care about because she thought she had to, like her class rank or independent films.

still -- she came home for the summer. and the shop was the first place she went when she got back.

he knew because he saw her car approach from the window, the backseat packed with her things. they’d had a screaming match that practically shook the block, that day, and an even more explosive fuck in the new break room, and then...

radio silence. for an entire summer.

and just when he’d started to have a prayer of forgetting about her, there she was again: winter break, sophomore year. no text to warn him ahead of time -- just ellie, at two o’clock in the morning on the wrong side of town, fresh off a delayed flight from the east coast and so tired she fell asleep as soon as he brought her up to the loft, before either of them could get their clothes off.

he still remembers the way she’d looked in his bed, her cheek mashed into his pillow with only the light from the city illuminating her beautiful face through the windows.

and the way she snuck out in the morning, while he kept his eyes closed and pretended to sleep through it.

then there was spring break, and the night before she’d flown back to new york, when they’d stayed up all night talking about everything and nothing. he’d been an even bigger idiot, then, letting her so far in -- just a little bit more every time she came back.

the summer after her sophomore year he’d even told her he loved her again.

the answer she gave will never not be permanently seared into his brain.

i love you, too.

but that doesn’t change anything.

probably the most annoying part of it all is that she was right. it didn’t change anything.

the summer still ended, and ellie still left.

pretty soon it’ll be time for winter break again, but for now she’s back at school and he’s home in LA and doing everything he possibly can to distract himself or take his mind off of her, but it doesn’t work and he’s alone when he never fucking expected to be and while there’s a lot of good that comes with suddenly wielding so much power, most of the time he just feels lost.

without her visits to tell the seasons by he knows he’d be drifting. work can only do so much to anchor him, and while he feels markedly better and more comfortable when he’s barking orders or fleshing out the finer details of a plan that’s going to make him a lot of money and even more notoriety, ellie’s always there, in the back of his mind.

okay, sometimes she’s in the forefront.

fine, most of the time she’s his every fucking thought. is that such a crime?

sometimes he hears her voice so clearly he’d swear she was there with him, another ghost haunting the shop he’ll never be able to knock out of his own head.

in between trying to forget about her, there’s alcohol and other girls and a lot of disregard for his own safety -- a lot of big risks, plans that are so dangerous and tough to pull off she’d never green light them, if she were here.

but she’s not. so there’s no one to stop him.

and he starts to resent her, just a little bit. it’s one of those things he isn’t exactly proud of, but it’s pretty much impossible not to, with the way she won’t just leave him alone and disappear completely so he can act like he never met her in the first place.

doesn’t she owe him that much, after everything?

evidently not, as far as ellie’s concerned.

she drops by the shop on a random tuesday and really rattles him -- it’s october, so there’s no reason for her to be on the west coast at all. he hasn’t prepared for this, like he has every december for the last few years, every mid-march and late may.

just seeing her is equal parts exhausting, exhilarating and infuriating. his chest does something funny as his body tries to decide whether he’s annoyed or thrilled.

he stares off after her as she breezes past him, dropping her bag by the door.

she offers up no explanation for her visit, but that’s par for the course, with ellie. ever since she started coming around again, she seems to just assume he knows what she’s doing here, like he can read her fucking mind or something.

well, he can’t. he shuts the door behind her just as his body settles on one reaction. annoyed it is, then. “why are you here?”

ellie purses her lips, like just the question’s bothering her. “um, i wanted to see you?” the way her voice lifts at the end implies she thinks it should be obvious.

well, it isn’t. “shouldn’t you be at school?”

she twists the cap back on the gatorade she’s stolen out of the break room fridge and shrugs at him. “probably.” straight, white teeth bite at her full bottom lip. “can we go upstairs?”

“no.” the word’s past his lips before he even realizes that’s how he planned on answering. colt blinks, ellie’s look of surprise surely mirrored on his own face.

“what?” she asks, and something about how stunned she seems emboldens him to double down.

“no,” colt repeats, folding his arms over his chest. there was once a time where noticing the way ellie’s eyes tracked the shifting of his shirt was exciting -- something that made him smug. now it just feels wrong, like another thing he wanted that life is giving to him in the worst way possible. “we can’t. you should go home.”

that really throws her for a loop. she stands up a little straighter. “home? why?”

she has some nerve, acting like she hasn’t been scrambling his brain for the last two and a half years. how can she not know? “because i’m sick of this, ellie. i’m not doing it anymore.”

he watches her eyes narrow with a sick sense of excitement. this is the part that’s familiar -- the argument. they’ve always been good at this. “and what exactly is it that you think we’re doing?”

“we’re not doing anything, anymore. i’m the one who’s been letting you jerk me around, but it’s over. go back to school. get your degree. lose my number. stop fucking bothering me.”

“so now i’m bothering you?” she asks, her glare so bright it’s a struggle not to avert his eyes. but he doesn’t; colt squares his shoulders and holds her gaze, keeping the expression on his face even.

“not only now,” he answers, feeling a little more like himself with every minute that ticks by. this is where she should be -- at an arm’s length, on the outside of his attitude. he should’ve never let her get close enough to force her way past it in the first place. “pretty much all year.”

it’s not like he hasn’t been dodging her text messages; he has. ellie doesn’t reach out often, but every time she does it’s another punch to the gut, something he has to physically force himself not to respond to. no amount of work can distract from the magnetic pull of his cell phone when there’s an unread text from her waiting.

it’s never what he wants to hear, though. it’s always something inconsequential, a stupid hiiiii or a worthless photo of new york.

he fantasizes often about the text he’d actually enjoy opening, reading and responding to, but it never comes. so he makes more work for himself and keeps his head down and tries, so fucking hard, not to think about her.

he tries and tries and it’s all for nothing, because she shows up and effortlessly sets his progress back without any effort at all.

“well if that’s how you feel, then don’t do me any favors,” she snaps, but makes no move to storm off back to the front of the shop where her bag and the door are waiting.

“fine,” he answers, sweeping his arm out wide as if to say be my fucking guest, “get out of my hair, ellie. go waste someone else’s time.”

“god, will you get over yourself? like you don’t know how much i hate being away from you --”

“stop it.” colt blinks, surprised by the way his own voice sounds. even through all he’s done -- the stuff he’s proud of and the stuff he knows he shouldn’t be proud of but still is -- he’s never heard himself sound like this, before. “don’t start that shit with me.”

“why? too afraid you might feel something?” she turns her cheek on him, shaking her head. “i don’t know why i even bother.”

“what the fuck are you talking about? you’re the one who’s always hot and cold.” the one who won’t stick around. the one who runs from him like he’s contagious.

“because i hate hurting you,” ellie answers, so passionately it startles him quiet. “i know that saying -- that all of it just makes it worse when i go back. i know that, okay? but i can’t -- i have to finish school, colt.”

“then go to school.” something about finally saying it feels so freeing, lifting a heavy weight off his shoulders -- one he hadn’t even realized he’d been carrying around. “you made your choice, so make it. leave me alone.”

ellie’s eyes start to shine; he forces his gaze away. that’s not fucking fair. she doesn’t get to cry -- not now. not after everything. she can’t just come in here and make that upset face and make him feel so fucking bad it’s nauseating -- she doesn’t get to do this to him.

“it’s not easy for me.” her voice is quiet, each word tight with emotion. he glares at the wall behind her. she’s not going to start crying and get him to relent. this argument is long overdue.

...that soft spot he has for her aches like a bruise.

damnit.

“colt?”

the hesitation in her tone pokes at it relentlessly. his stomach turns over as he realizes how unsure she sounds; she really thinks she isn’t welcome here, anymore.

“please don’t --” god fucking damnit. her voice is wavering, thick with tears he can see even without looking at her. “don’t be mad at me. i’m sorry, okay? i don’t mean to -- to hurt your feelings, and -- i’ve tried to avoid you, but. it’s not easy, colt. it’s so hard and i miss you so much and this is the only place i feel like myself and it’s like -- you’re the only person i know how to talk to and i want to be able to get over you, i do, and i know you want that too, but -- but --”

“ellie.” he sighs heavily, pressing his fingers into his eyes until he’s seeing stars, “don’t --”

too late. she lets out an audible sob that’s so loud it makes him wince, and then look around for an escape route, and then it ultimately weakens the last of his resolve until his feet propel him forward, shuffling against the cement floor to close the distance between them. “jesus christ, just stop it. come here.”

she falls heavily against his chest, and the part of him that’s been mentally counting down the days to her winter break seizes up happily despite himself; colt tucks his chin over her head and wraps his arms around her and forgets, for a moment, why this is such an awful idea.

he forgets about everything, actually, except for her.

then ellie’s sniffles taper off and the moment ends and he realizes what a gigantic fucking idiot he is for letting her snot up his shirt when he’s the one who’s constantly having his life ruined, who’s rightfully annoyed. colt pulls her back gently with his hands at her shoulders, holding her at both a literal and emotional arm’s length.

“what’re you even doing here? it’s the middle of the semester.”

her eyes are still glassy, the expression on her face pained. “i wanted to see you.”

something in his brain short circuits, giving up on trying to process her answer entirely.

out of all the million-and-one reasons she could have to be back in los angeles in the middle of the semester -- her dad had a heart attack, langston decided to close its campus, she worked so hard she was graduating a year early -- there was never a single part of him that had anticipated that answer.

and he has no idea what he’s supposed to say back.

especially not with her so close it’s taking everything he has not to pull her back into his arms and drag her upstairs.

that’s what she does to him. she makes it so he doesn’t know which way is up, so that he’s so confused and torn up his stomach is in knots all day, so that he’s so lost he isn’t even sure what he wants anymore when he finally has everything he’d ever planned for and can’t even fucking enjoy it because it turns out there’s no point in being king of anything without her in the seat she was made for.

“you flew all the way back here for what?” he asks, an edge to his voice that’s familiar but that he’s never used on her before. “an argument?”

ellie shakes her head. his annoyance worsens.

“a fuck?”

“no.” one delicate, charm-bracelet adorned wrist lifts to rub at her eyes. “i just wanted to see you. that’s all.” he stares at the line of her throat when she swallows. “i used my airline miles.”

christ. it’d be helpful if his brain would finish rebooting and finally come back online. “how long are you in town for?”

she sniffs. “two days.”

and then, the elephant in the room: “does your dad know?”

her hesitation would be enough of an answer on its own, but she still says, “no. just you.”

just you. his brain feels like swiss cheese.

colt stares at her for so long she starts fidgeting. there’s a lot they could talk about in two days. forget talking, actually -- a lot they could do. a lot of ways he could convince her to rethink this east coast thing, one more time...

but he knows he’s getting carried away again. he knows he shouldn’t be so hopeful, when ellie’s only ever disappointed him. just because she’s as lonely as he is doesn’t mean anything is going to change.

“this is the last time,” he lies, as the silence stretching between them starts to grow awkward. his own heavy swallow doesn’t stop his voice from shaking. “i mean it.”

“okay.” ellie’s voice is so small. it feels wrong.

but there’s nothing wrong about having her all to himself for the next forty-eight hours. that -- this -- ellie showing up on his doorstep after a spontaneous flight home just to see him -- feels like a fantasy made reality, a dream he shouldn’t be allowed to indulge in.

there’s nothing wrong about the way his hand links through hers to lead her upstairs, where she belongs.

it all seems perfect when she unpacks her duffel and mixes her t-shirts in with his on the loft floor.

every minute of mental torture he’s experienced over the last three years is worth it, just to be able to fall asleep with her two nights in a row.

it’s a beautiful lie. of course he’s not going to turn it down.

he knows it’ll be worse when she leaves this time than it ever has been -- that he’ll have to watch her disappear down the block and find a way to work on something for six hours straight to keep his mind off her flight back, that he’ll do his best not to keep his phone nearby all night in the hopes that he’ll hear from her but ultimately fail, that the stupid soft spot he’s cultivating for her that won’t go away will spread and worsen in the immediate aftermath of having her here and getting to play house, even if only for a few days.

on monday, he’s going to feel more lost than ever. this alternate reality will fade back into one of his too-hopeful dreams, so he might as well enjoy the quiet that being with ellie brings, for now -- the way having her voice with him in real life silences the ellie he hears in his head, and eclipses some of his longing loneliness with pure warmth and purpose, making a few days spent with her the most worthwhile thing he can think of to put his time into.

even if it doesn’t change anything.

#colt kaneko #ride or die #colt kaneko x mc #ellie wheeler #colt kaneko x ellie wheeler #myfic #long post #choicesoctoberchallenge2020 #idk where this is going i didn't plan it at all i just randomly got an idea and sat down and wrote it in one sitting and #idk i guess i just missed writing colt ok !! must there always be plot #isn't it enough to simply vibe #i just thought it was an interesting theme to play with ok

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puckngrind · 4 years

Text

What’s In A Name: 7 - J. Toews

Chapter 7.

Where we left off: Jon and Bekah were on vacation in Sedona when discussions changed the tone of things.

Warnings: smut, language, mentions of fighting and injury

Word Count: 3,380

Series Masterlist ) Puck ‘n Grind’s masterlist

Worlds.

Their worlds collided every single time they were together then life went on as normal. Jon ended up winning Gold at the World Cup of Hockey and the first call was to Bekah.

“I wish you were here for this.” He breathed out upon her answering. She could hear his teammates celebrating in the background.

“Congrats Tae!” Bekah felt guilt of saying no, even with her new passport’s arrival, flood her body in that moment. She had taken most of her vacation time off and his schedule for this tournament was tight. “I’m glad you didn’t get hurt.” She bit her lip as she remembers the conversation back in Sedona and could hear Jon’s smile through the phone. Their conversation was light then Jon was getting pulled away.

“I’ll see you in Columbus in a few weeks!” With that he was off. This was the second start of the season Bekah had been talking to Jon, so it was no surprise to her when she didn’t hear much from him during training camp. The team had a rough start and the fight Jon had on the ice against Nashville was proof. Bekah wasn’t sure what to think every time she would see him fight. It was barbaric but yet a turn on. Cursing her body as she sees him swinging at Neal on her screen knowing she wouldn’t see him for another week. She was never a hockey fan but her time at home working on her current project was usually done with Jon’s game as background noise. It became a habit and she didn’t hate it. Jon secretly relished in the fact that she watched his games.

The following week Jon was in Columbus. And just like every other time, the two spent all of his down time while in town in bed. Even with months between seeing each other, every time they were together it was as if no time was lost. Their bodies didn’t skip a beat when they would meet. The two had muscle memory for each other. Before Bekah left the next morning Jon pulls her tightly into his chest with a force that was soft but dominate.

“Can we talk about the holidays? Or you coming to Chicago for a weekend? Because, Beks, not seeing you for months and months absolutely kills me.” He admits.

“Like Christmas or Thanksgiving, Tae?” Bekah’s eyebrow and voice question Jon’s.

“Well my Thanksgiving was a few weeks ago.” Jon laughs.

“Oh right, Canadian.” Bekah retorts.

“I meant Christmas, Beks. I have a few days off and my family it coming to Chicago this year.” His fingers lift her chin up to look her in the eyes.

“Oh! Well. Uh...family?” Bekah feels the heat racing to her face.

“I love the way you blush just so you know.” His hand brushes her cheek. “Just think about it. They would love to see you again and of course, I want to see you.” Jon kisses her lips and leaves the conversation open for later.

Thanksgiving morning Bekah’s phone rings super early. She assumed it would be her mom double checking that Bekah had the pies covered for dinner which was really almost lunch. “Mom, I made the pies last night.” Her voice was groggy.

“Bekah, It’s Brynn. Jon got hurt last night. Have you talked to him?” Bekah rubbed her eyes and pulled the phone away from her head. An unknown number called her in the middle of the night and since she only had Jon’s number programmed to ring that late, she missed the call.

“Fuck. What? I... should... is he okay? What time is it in San Jose? Damnit. I didn’t watch because I was baking and fell asleep.” The realization of the unknown setting in.

“All I know is he didn’t come out for the 3rd period and Derek thinks it’s his back but maybe a concussion.” Brynn’s voice was ringing in Bekah’s ear. The two hung up and Bekah paced her bedroom floor then decided to text Jon given the time difference.

“Hey Beks.” She could hear the pain in his voice. He explained the injury told her he was day-to-day and suggested they talk to each other after her family’s holiday festivities. She didn’t know how to take it all in knowing he was across the country hurting. Then when Jon called again to tell her that he was headed back to Chicago and not with the team, Bekah booked a flight and took a cab to his place. She didn’t fully think it through as she leaned against his gate with a dead phone battery and no sign of Jon. She was contemplating walking towards the larger buildings of downtown or even campus when a SUV pulled up. She clutched her bag until Jon’s face was illuminated from the passenger seat and the Blackhawks symbol flashed in the street light as the door swung open.

“What are you doing here and why didn’t you tell me?” Jon tenderly steps out of the car and makes his way to her. Kissing her sweetly cupping her cold cheeks in his warm hands.

“I got worried and I have Monday off plus your voice Jon. Your voice when you told me you were headed back to Chicago said come.” The look of concern written across her face.

“I didn’t ask you to...” Jon’s face contorts knowing he wanted her there but didn’t want to pull her away from her family.

“I wanted to. Can we head in because it’s cold and I’ve been here awhile?” Jon nods and slowly makes his way inside with Bekah at his tail. His injury was bad enough to potentially sit out the next few games she knew it was killing him and she saw the frustration in the way he slept. Before heading to the airport Monday afternoon, Jon asked again about Christmas.

“Could I fly out Christmas evening?” She went to pull him in and stopped when she sees the grimace on his face. “Fuck. Sorry.”

“Yeah, I think that will work. Plus we play a home game on the 27th if you stay that late. You could wear my sweater.” His wink was all she needed. The flight back Bekah took in the short trip and realized in the almost two years of knowing Jon this was the first time they didn’t have sex while in the same city. They made out while watching movies, cooked together, showered together, and slept snuggled into each other. Her focus was being there for him and his injury and less of the sex that seemed to drive most of their shorter trips. She snuggled up into her sweatshirt trying not to think about what that meant but how she could make sure her Christmas trip was work free.

Christmas came and Bekah was shocked how seamless and not out of place she felt with Jon’s family. Well that was until they spoke French which was frequently and Jon made an effort to switch to English when he noticed Bekah’s face all scrunched up trying to follow. Jon laughed hard when she admitted in bed that night that while she has not a fucking clue what they were saying but she was sure it was about her.

“Not usually Beks. Well some of it was about you.” Jon kisses her and she huffs out with his admission.

“It is damn sexy coming out of your mouth even if it’s frustrating not understanding you.” Bekah runs her finger over his lips and he sucks them into his mouth.

“c'est noté.” Jon whispers. “Noted.”

The next few days were filled with getting to know his family but Jon made sure to sneak out with just Bekah too. The two said their goodbyes with discussions of seeing each other soon then Bekah was back home and back to her routine of life in Columbus.

“See, told ya!” Brynn shouted as Bekah caught up with her friend over wine on New Years Eve. “Name it whatever you two want name it but friend, that all screams girlfriend. Christmas with his family. Romantic stroll in Chicago. Watching another game with the Toews family. G-i-r-l-f-r-i-e-n-d.” Brynn tips her glass towards Bekah.

“We are not doing this again.” Bekah pulls her knees into her chest.

“We aren’t doing this but who is blowing up your phone right now?” Brynn points to the newest text alert.

“Can we just watch the game?” Bekah picks up her phone and flicks a finger at the television.

“Sure your hot ass hockey man is just chilling in his St. Louis hotel room alone texting you while he waits to play in the Winter fucking Classic where we SHOULD be right now... BUT no. I’m sitting here desperate for a tiny glimpse of my husband on the screen because he’s in Minnesota for New Years.” Brynn’s annoyance that Bekah didn’t tell her about the Winter Classic invite until that night was audible in her exhale.

“Rin, I was just with him plus that game is outside, in January.” Bekah looks down at her phone again and shivers thinking of watching hockey outside.

“And you are telling me New Years sex with that man wouldn’t be mind blowing?” Brynn’s eyes flashed to Bekah. “And the Winter Classic outside is kinda the point.”

“Oh! I see Derek!” Bekah points at the screen attempting to distract her bestie.

“Nice try. We don’t have to talk about it for now. When are you seeing each other again?” Brynn chirped.

“I don’t know. He said something about All-Star break but definitely after the season.” Bekah runs her finger over the rim of her wine glass.

“All star break is like your anniversary. What 2 years now?” Counting from the 2015 game on her fingers.

“Cannot have an anniversary when you don’t have a relationship...” Bekah’s voice tapers off.

“For the love of all things, Bekah.” Brynn pokes at her bestie in frustration. “I keep adding to my original list just so you know. ‘Shit that makes this a relationship when the two of you won’t call it what it is’ a growing list by yours truly.” Brynn ticks off her fingers mentally adding to the list.

“Well, All-Star break. He wants me to come to LA. Some gala before the game. That equals fancy dress Rin. Your girl doesn’t have a fancy dress.” Bekah keeps her eyes on the game and only turns when she realizes Brynn hasn’t responded yet. Her mouth dropped open staring at Bekah. “You okay?” She questions.

“The man wants to take you to the NHL 100 Gala. As his date? We will find you a fancy ass dress Bekah.” Brynn squeals her best friend’s name.

“Is this a big thing?” Bekah feels the lump in her throat.

“Yes. I’m assuming he’s being named one of the top 100 NHL players of the century. It’s a big fucking deal.” Brynn tosses her hands up in the air to exaggerate her point.

“Then maybe I shouldn’t... hmmm.” Bekah eyes Jon’s latest text which have gone from innocent conversation to very much missing her in the course of a few hours.

“Oh you are going!” Brynn almost shouted. “You are definitely going. I’ll request off work FOR you. Here, I’ll do it right fucking now. Ask Jon how many days he plans on sexing you up in SoCal.” Brynn points her finger at the phone again.

“Rin. Did you just?” Bekah just looks at her and back at Jon’s text about FaceTiming later.

“You two are hot for each other and adorable together.” She points to the newest alert. “And damnit have you looked at him? Of course you have. You get that handsome hockey man with the ass everyone is jealous of all to yourself whenever you want it too. Like you could be under him right now instead of sitting on my couch. He clearly thinks the same thing because I’m only assuming he’s sexting by the way your face looks.” Rin sips her wine in satisfaction of reading her best friend’s non-verbals so well.

“I.... uh...”Bekah’s head was spinning.

“You will take off. We will get you one amazing dress that will make that man melt. And you can FaceTime that man when you get home and tell him you are spending those few days in the warmth of Southern California with him before you start other things.” Brynn smile is mischievous as she takes in Bekah’s expression.

Like most trips, Jon met Bekah at the airport in Los Angeles. She was nervous about the events and the inevitable pictures but the way Jon reassured her made it all bearable. She watched him do roundtable discussions with men that the other grown men in the room were drooling over the way she would over a boy-bander in high school. She felt her skin heat up when they walked the red carpet. Jon pulled her close, kissed her temple and whispered, “when we stop just look up at me if you want okay?” She nodded and she did just that. Then she stepped back and admired the way Jon was so easy in front of the camera. He looked back once and she felt his energy radiating through her.

The All-Star game festivities were entertaining. Jon was so relaxed and Bekah felt it. They closed the door of their hotel room after the last event. “Thanks for coming Beks. Being my date. Doing all the standing and waiting things. Looking hot in that dress and my sweater so I could not think straight.” His breath was warm on her neck. His fingers roaming her skin.

“It’s getting easier the more things I do with you.” Bekah admits and moves her head to give Jon more room to suck the sweet spot he knew made her weak.

“Then maybe if we make the playoffs you will come and wear the cute jean jackets the girls have with my name and number on the back?” Jon doesn’t release Bekah from his hold.

“What?” The way Jon was making her feel was clouding Bekah’s head.

“We can talk later.” Jon pulls Bekah’s legs up so her core is pressed against his hard cock. She moans forgetting the need to clear up his statement and wraps her legs around him to move up and down needing more friction. “My girl needs me eh?”

“You are damn sexy in that suit Mr. Toews but I’d like you out of it now.” Bekah bites at his neck.

“You don’t have to ask me twice Beks.” Jon moves and Bekah groans when the pressure is gone. “Oh, my girl REALLY needs me?” Jon laughs and starts discarding both of their clothes. Bekah’s nails scrape down his torso and she drops to her knees. “Beks.” He breathes out and leans into the bed. She licks the pre cum off the head and slowly slides her lips around him. “Fuck.” Jon’s voice catches in his throat. She releases for a moment to look how unglued he was. Always so meticulous but she seemed to have a power over him no one else possessed which sent a current coursing through her body just thinking about it. “Where do you want me Tae?” She kisses under his length and blinks up at him. Jon’s eyes were closed but he blinks them open.

“I want inside you, Beks.” He whispers. She licks from his base to his tip again before moving up his body.

“Oh yeah?” She kisses his lips and feels his tongue asking for permission but she pulls away. He groans out of being denied. “Remember after your cup win when you bent me over the couch?” She smirks at him and runs her finger down his jawline.

“Yeah.” He huffed out. “I was embarrassingly a quick draw.” he looks into Bekah’s eyes and sees a spark. Her eyes flutter towards the couch.

“Wanna bend me over that Tae?” She bites her lip.

“Yes. Fuck yes.” Jon stands and walks Bekah backwards until her ass hits the back of the couch. Tenderly he flips her around and she braces herself. Jon slides in slowly and both moan out of the need. His hips work faster slamming into Bekah as she begs for more. The sweat dripping down both of them as Bekah presses herself into each of Jon’s movements. Bekah releases a hand from the death grip on the leather to her clit. “Beks that’s hot. Come on Baby.” Jon grunts feeling his climax coming. Bekah moans out his name and the two hit their highs. Jon doesn’t let up when she releases her hand from herself. He slowly lowers his body on hers kissing between her shoulder blades.

“Well...” Bekah tries to talk but her breath is labored.

“Well that’s what you deserved after my cup win Beks.” This causes both to laugh as Jon moves both of their bodies so she’s pressed against his chest.

“Oh you made up for it, Tae.” Bekah looks up into his brown eyes that are saying more than the words he’s spoken. “Now can we shower and talk about this jacket thing?” Her fingers dance on his collarbone.

“It’s nothing really just the girls get these jackets for playoffs. You would look good in one that’s all.” Jon leads her to the shower.

“Like a WAG thing, Jon?” Bekah asks as the reach the shower.

“Just a you are mine kinda thing.” Jon pulls her under the water spray.

“I’m yours Tae?” Bekah looks up at Jon with the water rolling down his body.

“Yeah Beks. You are mine. You mean more to me than anyone or anything else.” He kisses her hard letting the water run over their connected bodies. “I don’t care who knows it either.” He pulls her up into him and starts to wash them both.

They settled in bed that night and Jon quickly falls asleep from the weekend of events.

“Jon are you awake?” Bekah whispers in the middle of the night.

“No.” He mumbles in her neck.

“Jon, you got a very big award this weekend. Only 100 NHL players past and present got it. That’s big. Like really big.” She leans back a little.

“Is that keeping you up?” Jon kisses her.

“No, well... yes... no. I’m just curious. Are there awards and things I don’t know about? You were sitting with hall of famers and fit right in. That’s a big deal. You are big deal.” Her voice barely above a whisper.

“You’ve still never googled me Beks?” Jon’s eyebrow shoots up.

“Well, after googling Blackhawks WAGS and seeing a picture of you with someone else I decided that I’d just learn about you from you.” Bekah admits.

“Well, you know about most of them. Three cups, two Olympic golds, some MVPs and such.” Jon kisses her lips again.

“Wait, you have two Olympic gold medals?” She sits up.

“Yeah. I know you watch the Olympics. I’ve seen your closet.” Jon sits up remembering giving her shit about all the Team USA and Olympic apparel she had. He pulls her into his chest.

“Yeah, but I clearly didn’t realize you were on both Gold winning teams and I didn’t much pay attention to hockey before you.”

Jon laughs, “true.”

“And most don’t have all that?” She questions.

“Well, no, not really.” Jon hesitates. “What’s in your brain Beks?”

“Just trying to process why me, I guess. When you are so... you know, you.” Bekah admits.

“Beks.” Jon whispers. “You are the most amazing woman I’ve ever met and we have the rhythm I’ve never had with anyone else. Plus I kinda love the fact that you don’t care about all the accolades and almost would prefer not to be in the spotlight even though I wish you were by my side for all the work things.” His lips kiss just behind her ear. Both sat in the quiet for a moment.

“Yeah, but our lives are in two different cities, Tae.” Bekah finally lets his words soak in.

“But they don’t have to be, Babe. You could always come to Chicago.” Jon answers simply but what he was saying had real weight to it and they both knew it.

#What's in a name fic #WIAN #Jonathan Toews fic #jonathan toews #j toews fic #tazer me 19 #love a damn blackhawk 🤦🏻‍♀️#happens in the 2016-2017 NHL season

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oliviastan17 · 5 years

Text

Just a dream (1/7)

Summary: You are the prop manager working on the set of FATWS and that means you are in charge of putting the Winter Soldier arm on Sebastian Stan. Feelings develop (for one of you) and the pair’s mutual friend Chris Evans steps in to be a wingman.

Warnings: 18+, language, fluff, smut, drinking

Length: 3.5k (ish)

A/N: So this was a dream and I dream in stories…like they pick up again where they left off every couple of days (it’s weird I know). I already had dream #2 but I’m probably not going to post it unless someone asks for it. Also I have never written anything before so be nice…or don’t…whatever. Feel free to reblog. DO NOT POST TO ANY OTHER WEBSITE! And thank you @sinner-as-saint for helping me!

Even outside the trailer you could hear the laughter. One you recognized.

Knock knock knock.

Sebastian answered the door.

“Hey, I need to get you in your arm,” you said.

The words took no more than 3 seconds to say but he was immediately fascinated with you.

“No fucking way! Y/n?!”

You watched Chris as he walked out of Sebastian’s trailer and down the stairs to give you a hug.

“Oh God, what are you doing here? Are you just following me around now?” you responded.

“Ha ha,” he said sarcastically wrapping you up in a hug. “Just came to see some friends. I’m working across the lot. How have you been?” he asked crossing his arms.

“I was great and then you showed up,” you said smiling casually while holding a winter soldier arm in your hands.

“Seb, Y/n here is the best prop manager there is. I mean her personality is kinda “meh” but she’s great at her job!” he said laughing as he dodged your kick

“Evans, go away or I will very happily show your friend here those pictures I only told you I deleted.”

He threw his arms up. “Okay, I’m gonna go find Mackie. Watch out for this one,” he said pointing at you to Sebastian. “She’s nothing but trouble.”

“God, he’s like that annoying brother you can’t get away from,” you said laughing. “Arm please,” you said shaking a bottle of lube.

“Best part of the day,” Sebastian sarcastically said.

He took his jacket off, pulled his arm out of the sleeve of his shirt and held it out while you poured lube from his elbow down to his fingers and began to spread it around to cover his entire muscular forearm. His eyes were immediately drawn to the diamond ring you wore on your left ring finger. Damn, she’s taken.

You didn’t see when Chris turned around and started walking back towards you. Your back was to him and he took the opportunity.

He snuck up behind you and screamed “Y/N!”

Your scream made several crew members turn their heads.

“I fucking hate you so much,” you said as he laughed hysterically.

“I forgot to ask you…I’m producing this project coming up and we need a prop manager and I think you would be perfect for…”

“No!” you cut him off. “I am never working with you again. Ever!”

“Sounds great! I’ll call you! Thanks Y/n!” he said as he walked away ignoring your rejection. You didn’t really mean it anyway.

“I swear I’m going to release those photos,” you said to Sebastian. “And you better warn me if you see him coming back over here.”

“I will, I promise. What kind of photo’s are they?”

“Let’s just say he may or may not have passed out after a wrap party and I may or may not have taken some compromising pictures.” Your smile almost took the breath out of him.

“Okay, you have to show me now…”

“I’m going to keep holding them over his head for now. Especially if he’s going to keep hanging out over here.”

Your walkie talkie made a beep and an assistant radioed asking which gun they were using for Falcon today.

With the metal arm successfully in place you wiped her hands on a towel and took the walkie out of your back pocket and radioed that you would be there in a minute.

“Okay, how’s that feel? You can move and everything?”

“Yeah it feels great,” Sebastian said while wiggling his hand around.

The walkie went off again and you excused yourself to go deal with your next task. As he watched you walk away he mumbled to himself, “God I’m in trouble.”

*****************************************************************************************

He had never enjoyed going to work so much. He always liked going to work but not as much as he did now. Going meant he got to see you. You fascinated him. You were funny, a tad mysterious and absolutely gorgeous.

Over the past few months he had grown to like you even more and he wasn’t sure how that was possible. But for the last week he couldn’t help but notice you weren’t your normal happy self…and your ring was missing. It was an cruel symbol staring him in the face every time you were handing him some prop for a scene or putting the arm on which, lucky for him, was every day this week.

“What happened to your ring?” he asked as you were pouring the KY on his arm.

“Oh…um… I tend to take off jewelry given to me when the person that gave it to me cheats.” You took a deep breath and avoided making eye contact.

“I’m sorry.”

That was all he could think to say. He could tell you didn’t want to talk about it so he didn’t press anymore.

Your walkie beeped-“Y/n, I can’t find the phones we need for today. Or the knives. Or the shield.”

With an annoyed expression on your face you looked down at your hands which were covered in lube and you had (of course) forgotten the towel. Your walkie was in the normal place, in your back pocket.

“Can you help me out?” you asked turning around signaling you wanted him to take the walkie out of your pocket. He did and held the button down so you could speak.

“I was just in the prop room 5 minutes ago and laid everything out. It’s all there. Look harder,” you said as you rolled your eyes and continued to help Sebastian into the arm.

A minute later there’s another beep- “Y/n I still can’t find ‘em.”

“You’ve gotta fucking be kidding me,” you said under your breath.

Nodding at Sebastian to push the button on the walkie you replied “Yeah, ok I’ll be right there.”

You were finished putting the arm on but still had no towel to wipe your hands. You turned around again to have Sebastian put the walkie back in your pocket. He did so being careful not to take advantage of the situation even though he very much wanted to. As you walked away he felt his chest ache. Who the fuck would cheat on you? He also felt a little guilty for being so happy that you were now single.

*******************************************************************************************

It was maybe a month later when he finally started to notice you were getting back to smiling, laughing, and generally being the woman he was first so attracted to. Filming was on a break for a week for Thanksgiving and he was missing going to work. In fact, he was counting down the days until everyone was back on set. Deciding distraction was the way to go he went out to get a start on Christmas shopping. Wandering aimlessly through a store he stopped dead in his tracks when he heard your voice and looked up.

You were walking towards him with bags in one hand and the hand of a small child in your other. Running your fingers through your hair you stopped to look at some toys sitting on the end of the aisle and he could hear you asking the child to choose between 2 toys.

“Which one should we get for Noah?”

She pointed at one after some thought and then went to grab the other one.

“This one is for me.”

“Hmmm…Well maybe Santa will bring that one for you for Christmas. But we’re not getting it today.”

She didn’t like that answer and proceeded to argue with you and eventually started to fake cry and throw a fit.

Squatting down to be on her level you calmly said “Hey you need to calm down. Do I need to call Santa and tell him you’re not behaving?” She shook her head no and then found a ball to play with.

“That’s what I thought,” you said with a laugh. As you stood up you saw Sebastian walking towards you with that ridiculously handsome smile.

“I didn’t know you had a little girl.”

“She’s my niece.”

He nodded in understanding.

“Harper, this is my friend Sebastian. Can you say hi?” you said to the three year old now hugging your leg.

Sebastian knelt down. “It’s nice to meet you Harper,” he said as he held his hand out for a handshake. She shook her head no and hid behind your legs.

“How about a high five?” he asked. She shook her head no again.

“What about knuckles?” you suggested and Harper smiled and extended her fist to pound into his.

Sebastian and you talked about nothing in particular for 5 minutes while Harper continued to play with the ball she was still holding and then (of course) decided to start acting up again.

“Oh man, where’s my phone to call Santa?” you said while you looked through your purse and pulled out your phone. Harper once again settled down and got distracted by pushing buttons on a different toy.

“Wow that works really well,” Sebastian said with a laugh.

“Yeah except for the time I was talking to “Santa” and she ripped the phone away from my ear and realized there was no one there.”

“Well we can’t have that.” He grabbed the phone out of your hand. “I’m putting my number in your phone so when you call “Santa” that won’t happen again.”

“Oh you don’t have…”

“Done.” He handed the phone back to her with his signature grin.

Before you could argue with him more you felt someone tug on your sweater.

“Auntie I have to go potty.”

“Alright let’s go. Say goodbye to Sebastian.”

Harper shyly waved goodbye.

“Bye Harper. Make sure to tell your Aunt you want to talk to Santa later. I’m sure he’s just waiting for your call to hear about your day.”

Later that night….

“So it’s getting kinda late and Santa hasn’t heard from you (sad face emoji)”

You looked through your texts and saw that he had texted himself from your phone. Sneaky.

“Well she doesn’t live with me and I thought it might be a little weird to have my brother call you lol”

“OK I guess that would be a little strange. Are you planning on stopping by James’ tonight?”

“I wasn’t planning on it.”

“Could I change your mind on that?”

“I don’t know. Give it your best shot.”

He took a picture of himself pouting and sent it.

“Please?”

“I’m not convinced…”

He took a more dramatic crying photo and sent it.

“What about now?”

“Nope. Gonna have to try harder.”

He had someone take a photo of him with his head in his hands. Chris was sitting next to him pointing at Sebastian while making the gesture of a tear falling down his cheek. You laughed at the picture.

“I guess I could use a drink…”

You could hear Mackie’s booming laughter as you walked into the bar. He and Sebastian were playing darts and arguing about the rules while others were playing pool. It was a dive bar, low key and relaxed environment. Just the kind you liked.

“Anthony enough with the thighs! What do your thighs have to do with you sucking at darts?” Sebastian yelled.

Anthony laughed and saw you walking towards them.

“Hey, Y/n come watch me teach Seb a lesson!” he said as he threw the dart at the target and completely missed.

“I’m gonna get a drink first Hawkeye,” you laughed.

Sebastian watched you as you walked away. After ordering you leaned against the bar resting your elbow on it. You were laughing at something someone said as you reached for your drink when Chris spotted you. He snuck up on you while your back was turned and grabbed your shoulders.

“Y/N!”

“Oh my god!” you yelled while you brought your hand up to your racing heart. “Why are you always doing that?”

“You’re just too easy to scare. I can’t help it. I’m sorry!”

“No, you’re not!”

“Yeah, I know I’m an asshole,” he said laughing. “But you know who’s not an asshole? Sebastian.”

He saw the genuine confusion on your face. “I think he’s into you so I’m just here to put in a good word for him.”

He sensed your hesitation. “Look, he really wanted you here tonight and he hasn’t stopped looking for you since you said you were coming. I know you just got out of your last relationship…and I told you I never liked that guy…but I just want you to know that Seb’s one of the good guys okay? Just keep an open mind.”

You nodded and took a deep breath.

“Now, let’s get you drunk,” he said as he handed you a shot which you downed and chased with a beer. After one more shot courtesy of Chris and a refilled beer you began to feel the effects before you had even finished walking over to the tables the rest of the crew were at by the dart boards.

Sebastian gave you hug as you walked up. “So am I always going to need Chris here to help me convince you to come out?”

“Actually you had me convinced with the first photo. I was just curious to see what else you would come up with,” you laughed.

“I like a challenge,“ he said with a mischievous grin.

The night was full of laughter, stolen looks, and many, many drinks thanks to a drinking game you and Sebastian created.

“Take a shot every time Chris laughs and grabs his chest,” you whispered to Sebastian.

He laughed. “We’re going to get alcohol poisoning.”

Five shots into the night Chris had figured out what the two of you were doing so the game was called off. It was a little before 2 am and by that point most members of the group had either left or started to arrange for rides home.

When your Uber was less than 5 minutes away Sebastian walked outside with you to wait for both of your rides. It was cold outside and you stood with your arms crossed, shifting your weight and taking small steps to try and warm up.

“Come here,” Sebastian said as he put his arms around you in a hug.

“You smell like whiskey and ceder wood,” you said laughing.

“Is that a good thing?” he laughed.

“Yes, you smell good.”

You lifted your head up and made eye contact, your faces only inches apart. You both starred into each other’s eyes for a good 10 seconds before your phone chimed and you broke the stare grabbing your phone to check where the car was.

“Ugh! Dumb ass is nowhere near here. He’s just driving in a circle 2 blocks away.”

Sebastian’s Uber pulled up right then and he opened the door.

“We can share mine.”

You got in the car on the passenger side as he held the door and scooted over to the driver’s side to make room for him. After giving the driver your address you relaxed in your seat leaning your head back on the headrest.

“Ah I needed this so much tonight.”

“I think the words you are looking for are ‘thank you Seb for getting me to come out tonight.’”

“Thank you Seb.” As you said the words the most breath taking smile took over his face. Why it took Chris saying what he said to open your eyes to the absolute beauty sitting next to you, you’ll never understand.

The rest of the ride is filled with flirts and teasing.

"Well this is me. Thanks for the ride. I’ll see you later,” you said as you gave him a hug.

“Not if I see you first.” He dropped his head and brought his hand up to rub his forehead as he realized what he said was completely cheesy.

“Very smooth.” Laughing you stepped out of the car and Sebastian watched you walk up to your door. He couldn’t believe someone as stunning, kind, and incredible as you existed.

As the Uber drove away he was lost in his thoughts. You made him nervous and he said that stupid “not if I see you first” line. What was he thinking?

He only lived about 15 minutes from you but he felt like the ride only lasted 30 seconds. Time flew when he thought about you. When he arrived at his house he opened the door to get out of the car when a light caught his eye. It was a cell phone left on the seat. It was your cell phone.

“Turn around,” he told the driver with a smile on his face. Thank God someone decided to text you at the exact right time.

The driver pulled up to the house and Sebastian walked up to your front door and rang the doorbell. He told himself to actually be smooth this time.

You answered the door in pajamas (black leggings and an off the shoulder red sweatshirt). Hair up in a messy bun and makeup off you were still the most beautiful person he had ever seen.

“Hey, what’s up?”

“You forgot something,” he said holding up your phone.

“Oh my god, thank you,” you said as you let out a sigh of relief. “I thought I left it at the bar or something.”

“I forgot something too.” He walked towards you until his lips were less than an inch from your face. His hand cupped the back of your neck while the other wrapped around your waist with his eyes never leaving yours. He waited for any sign of rejection and when you gave none he pressed his lips to yours. It was soft at first and you wrapped your arms around his neck. As he deepened the kiss you pushed the door shut and the two of you walked further into your house while your lips never left each other.

He had you pinned against the wall kissing your neck while his grip around your waist tightened. Picking you up so that your legs wrapped around his waist he carried you to the bedroom where he sat down on the bed as you straddled his thighs. You smiled against his lips and he broke the kiss to stare at you while tucking a few stray hairs behind your ear.

You pulled his face closer to yours and kissed him while taking off his jacket. He removed his shirt and then slipped his hands up and under your shirt to remove it. As his hands caressed your back you began to move your hips to grind on him. He let out a soft moan as he grabbed you to place your back on the bed and climbed on top of you.

He kissed you with unbelievable passion as his hands felt every inch of you they could. He slipped his hand down the front of your leggings just as he slipped his tongue into your mouth. You moaned as he rubbed your clit. Your back arched as he kissed his way down from your neck to your breasts to your stomach. He watched you bite your lip as he peeled your pants off and licked his lips before crashing them back onto yours. He had his fingers curling while pumping in and out of you while his mouth moved perfectly with yours. Sebastian was somehow able to touch you in every single right spot at the right time and soon he felt your walls clamp down on his fingers while you moaned in release.

Watching him take his pants off and bite his lip was the sexiest thing you had ever seen. No words were needed. He somehow knew what you wanted and performed expertly. He moved in and out of you at the perfect rhythm. It did not take long for you to come completely undone as he brought you to a shaking orgasm. Watching you completely lose control made him come soon after.

As you both laid there recovering he brought his right hand up in the air with his palm facing you. You slapped it with the palm of your left hand and you both laughed at the after sex high five. It was something that would be repeated 2 other times that night.

Next Part

#sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan #sebastian stan x you #sebastian+stan+fandom #sebastian stan smut #sebastian stan fluff #sebastian stan fanfiction #platonic!chris evans #sebastian stan fan fiction #chris evans #fatws #tfatws #sebastian stan imagine #the falcon and the winter soldier

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stereksecretsanta · 4 years

Text

Merry Christmas, obsessedbutonline!

For @obsessedbutonline, who listed fluff, angst, and ‘Derek giving Stiles gift’ as a few ‘Likes’. I hope I did those items justice. Hope you have a wonderful Christmas, Friend!

Read On AO3

*****

The Gift

The gift. He supposed it all started with the gift. Or maybe Star Trek. Derek wasn’t sure. It was Stiles, after all. One day, the younger man had been debating the cuddle rating of a Tribble, before diving into an analysis of The Voyage Home being one of the worst movies in franchise history (except for the whales, of course), and the next thing Derek knew, he’d found himself discussing how Moby Dick was one of his favorite books. The random jumps from one topic to another hadn’t been anything new for Stiles, but that had also been the year they’d legitimately gotten ‘together’ after their contentious circling of each other’s orbits, so when Derek had opened an inelegantly wrapped early edition of the novel on that first Christmas as a couple, he’d been rendered speechless.

He couldn’t remember how long he’d stared at the leather-bound copy exactly, but he did recall feeling a bout of inadequacy. He thought he’d hid it well though. “Stiles – “ he’d started. “I wasn’t expecting…This is too much.”

Stiles had shrugged like it hadn’t been a big deal, an eager grin on his face. “Nah, it wasn’t too bad. A classmate mentioned a prof who needed an assistant to help translate some Latin verses, and I thought I’d check it out. When I went, I noticed a copy of Moby Dick in his office, and you’d mentioned it was one of your favorites, so I offered my translation services for free if he would sell the book for a discounted price.”

Of course, Stiles had remembered that weird detail from a throwaway conversation. And of course, he’d been resourceful in procuring it. That was just who Stiles was. Now, Derek, on the other hand… well, he’d felt completely out of his league when he’d pulled out the gift card he’d picked up a day earlier from a comic book store. He hadn’t even known if that was a store Stiles ever visited. He really sucked at gift-giving. “Sorry, I didn’t …”

Stiles had yanked it out of his hands before he’d even finished. “I love it. Thanks, Derek!” The younger man had beamed excitedly, clutching that cheap piece of plastic in his hands as if he’d just received some personal heirloom. There had been no uptick in the man’s heartrate, so there’d been no lie in those words, but that hadn’t stop Derek from feeling bad.

And it was then that he had resolved to do better, that he would be thoughtful and meticulous in his gift selection the next time Christmas rolled around. Stiles deserved as much.

But he’d mentioned he was bad at gift-giving, right? As in, monumentally bad. Because the next Christmas, when they’d settled down on his couch after an intimate holiday dinner he’d prepared for the two of them, Stiles had presented him with a charmingly wrinkled gift bag. And when he’d pulled out a lovingly restored and framed photograph of his family from before the fire, he’d not only felt a slight lump in his throat at the sentiment, he’d also felt remarkably small and completely lacking in comparison. It was a good thing they’d come to a mutual understanding that their birthdays would be a no-gift zone, because Derek wasn’t sure he could’ve handled double the inferiority complex this time of year.

“I found a copy of the photo from the digital archives of the town newspaper. It was for some fundraiser committee your mom chaired, I think. I saved a copy, and googled around for some pointers on how to increase the resolution so I could print out a decent version of it,” Stiles had explained.

Derek had nodded absently, his fingers lightly tracing the curve of his mother’s face under the cool glass. His whole family had stared back at him, carefree and unburdened in the moment that photo had been taken, eyes all shiny from a sunny afternoon picnic. “Yeah, I remember. It was a Pets in the Park fundraiser for the local animal shelter.” There had been an ache in the pit of his stomach at the reminder of everything he’d lost, but it wasn’t as sharp as it had once been. Now, it had been dulled by time, and tempered by the meaningful relationships he’d found, foremost of which was the one with the man beside him. “Thank you,” he’d said slowly, slightly surprised that his voice hadn’t cracked at the pool of emotion swirling within him.

“Anytime, big guy.” Stiles had leaned in, his weight and warmth freely offered as a source of silent strength.

But when he’d pulled out his gift for Stiles, he had had that sinking feeling of failing an important test. He hadn’t even had time to wrap it properly, opting to place a haphazard bow on it instead. “Sorry, I didn’t know …”

Stiles had grabbed the cellophane-covered box with a puzzled expression. “A bath set?” he’d asked slowly. “Is this your way of telling me I stink?”

There had been amusement in the younger man’s tone, devoid of upset or disappointment, but that hadn’t stopped Derek from feeling upset and disappointed in himself. After Stiles had gone through all the trouble of giving him such a personal and meaningful gift, he’d reciprocated with … soap. “Remember when you were on break during Thanksgiving,” he’d started to explain. “That necromancer problem we had?”

“Oh, damn, do I ever! We spent the whole night trying to wash zombie goo out of bodily crevices I never knew I had!” Then, realization had set in as those rich brown eyes widened. “This is perfect, Derek! Thank you!” And just like that, Stiles had fallen on him with his usual gracelessness, and proceeded to express his ‘gratitude’ properly.

That had been last year. But this time around, right before Stiles had returned to campus for his final two semesters of college, Derek had stumbled upon the ideal Christmas gift, while they were cleaning, of all things. They’d been packing up and storing some of Stiles’ stuff before the younger man headed back to school when they’d gotten diverted by some dusty, old boxes in the Sheriff’s attic. Somehow, in the way of procrastination, they’d ended up flipping through old photo albums when Stiles had paused to tell him about a picture of his mother.

“Oh, there’s the locket my dad helped me buy for Mother’s Day when I was eight,” Stiles had said as he’d pointed to a picture of Claudia Stilinski, vivacious and beaming brightly at the camera. Anyone could see where Stiles had gotten his smile. “I didn’t have the greatest taste in jewelry, so it doesn’t look like much, but she was so excited when she got it. She wore it all the time.”

“It’s nice that you have a memento to remember her by,” Derek had supplied.

Stiles’ shoulders had slumped a little at the comment. “Yeah, I think we accidentally sold it during a garage sale not long after she died. Dad wasn’t exactly in the best place, and he just wanted to get rid of the memories because they hurt so much back then. Lots of regret now. Who knows? It might’ve found another home, or it might be in a garbage dump somewhere.”

And that comment had led him down the winding, convoluted path to where he was now: standing in front of a teenage girl with bright blue hair and an eclectic ensemble of a loose plaid shirt, artfully ripped leggings, and combat boots.

“A hundred bucks,” the girl re-stated, her tone indicating that this wasn’t a negotiation.

“One hundred? The pawn shop owner said you only paid five dollars for it.” He could be stubborn too, though deep down, he knew he wasn’t really in a position of power in this situation, much as that rankled him.

Ms. Blue-hair shrugged. “So? If you want it that bad, then you should be willing to pay for it.”

She had him there. Three months of diligently interviewing the Stilinski neighbors, and following a trail of multiple goodwill and pawn shops had led him to that very locket hanging from the girl’s neck, that very locket Stiles had shown him in that old photo of his mother. He gave the teen what Stiles had laughingly termed his ‘murder-brow’ look and pulled out his wallet. Of course, he would pay, especially after all the work he’d put into tracking it down, and because this was for Stiles. He didn’t have to like being swindled like this though.

“That’s a nice jacket, by the way.”

Derek looked up from pulling out the cash and froze. He glared at the girl, hoping the intensity of his stare would deter whatever she was about to insinuate. It didn’t work.

“No,” he said flatly as she watched him expectantly.

“Okay, I guess we’re done here then. Nice meeting you.” And with that, she turned and started to walk away.

Derek ground his teeth together to keep from outright growling and fought hard to not wolf out. He hated being bested like this. Life would’ve been so much simpler if he could just take the damned piece of jewelry by force and run off with it. Stupid morals.

“Fine,” he conceded with a clenched jaw after she’d managed to walk several feet away.

She turned with a triumphant smile as he started to shrug off his leather jacket. When he held it out with the wad of cash, she unclasped the chain without any further objections and handed it over. “Pleasure doing business with you, sir.”

(***)

Stiles’ name flashed on his lock screen just as he was pulling up to his loft.

“Hey, you back already?” he answered as he shifted his car into park. His regular visits to Stanford notwithstanding, he’d been anticipating Stiles’ winter break for a while, and the timing couldn’t have worked out any better with him finding the locket when he had. “I was going to pick you up tonight after you’ve had a few hours with your dad.”

Several seconds of heavy breathing greeted his words, and almost instantly, he was on alert, muscles tensing and heartrate increasing. “Stiles?”

“Yeah, Derek, I’m here,” a familiar voice sounded through the phone. “Sorry, just had to get around Scott to check something out. But no, I’m not home yet. Got sidetracked on my way into town. Can you come to the preserve right now? The trail just off Parsons. We’ve got, um, a problem.”

Since his return to Beacon Hills, the supernatural activity in the area had decreased significantly, especially with a solid pack established in the area now, but that didn’t mean there wasn’t the occasional run-in with creatures bringing in death and mayhem. This sounded like one of those times. Shifting gears into reverse, he responded without hesitation, “On my way.”

The trip to the preserve was quick, the route having been travelled so many times that he could probably drive it eyes closed. After parking in the lot off Parsons, he picked up Stiles’ scent almost immediately, along with a few others of the pack, and had no problems tracking the source down a few hundred feet off a popular running path.

Not surprisingly, Scott noticed him first, looking up from a patch of tall grass and nodding in greeting as Derek silently approached. Stiles stood more out in the open, back turned and head down as he tapped busily on his phone. Once upon a time, his quiet ‘stalking’ would’ve caused a flailing of limbs and a high-pitched yelp from the younger man, but of the familiarity borne from the years of closeness, Stiles simply turned, smiled, and greeted him with a warm ‘hey’ as if he’d known he was there the whole time. And all things considered, he probably had.

They’d never been a couple for overt displays of affection, but the way Stiles unconsciously leaned toward him, trusting and open, worked just as well in telling Derek how the other man felt. He usually did the same, subtly breathing in the scent of his boyfriend and feeling more settled in his presence. They hadn’t seen each for a couple of weeks, and he’d missed having Stiles near.

“What’s going on?” he asked, looking around for the rest of the pack. Their scents were fainter, which meant they had been here recently, but had likely wandered off or left altogether.

“It’s Christmastime in Beacon Hills, so the usual. Y’know, carolers, Santa parades, sleigh rides, tidings of comfort and joy, and oh yeah, witches.”

Derek had never been bothered by Stiles’ sarcasm, though he wouldn’t openly admit that if asked about their first encounters with each other, but now, he found the trait rather endearing. “So, we’re dealing with a witch. How bad?”

“That’s what I’m trying to figure out. I was driving back into town when I saw a kid running across the road. Freaked me out, and barely stopped in time. When I went to check on him, he was crying and said an old woman had tried to take him. At first, I thought it was an attempted kidnapping, but then, he said that there was a lot of screaming coming from her big bag, and he was scared of getting stuffed in there with all the other kid. For this town, that triggered alarm bells. Stuffing kids into bags and lugging them around is not your regular run-of-the-mill kidnapper MO. I called my dad, and he came out here with a few units, but is running interference on the supernatural front. He’d mentioned that this was the third attempted kidnapping this month, so the deputies are on high alert. They still think it’s a regular human predator, so they’re canvassing the other side of the preserve right now, which means we can do our own investigation here. I called Scott, and the others are now fanned out, doing a search to see if we can catch a scent.”

“No luck yet,” Scott added as he strode over to join them. “Just a whole bunch of the usual smells, and with the people that use the running trails, it’s hard to pinpoint a specific one. We’re not exactly sure what we’re looking for.”

“I think I have a lead though.” Stiles held out his phone to show an etching of a stooped crone with a large sack. “We might have an Icelandic witch in the area, one that kidnaps and eats children, but I’m not a hundred percent. I hope I’m not right because … well, children! But she’s supposed to be active around Christmas. I need to double-check some books at my house to make sure though.”

Derek nodded, not surprised that Stiles had pretty much figured it out already. As human as Stiles was, he was arguably one of the pack’s most valuable assets, and truth be told, Derek felt quite proud of the other man’s quick wit and life-saving accomplishments. “So, you need to go home then?”

Stiles made a sound of agreement as he tucked his phone away and gave him an apologetic look. No words were needed to communicate how sorry he was that their reunion wasn’t what they’d planned.

“Okay, call us with any info,” Scott chimed in. “Derek and I will probably be more useful if we keep scouting the area. This is children we’re talking about. I don’t want anymore of them put in danger.”

“Yes, sir, Mr. Alpha leader, sir,” Stiles replied jokingly, giving his friend a mock salute.

The years had matured Scott somewhat, enough that the erstwhile werewolf took his role and responsibilities somewhat seriously now. And for this, Derek was grateful.

Scott gave Stiles a shove to get him on his way, before shaking his head with a laugh and started to move back to the tall grass he’d been searching through earlier. “Go, you idiot.”

Stiles responded with the very mature gesture of sticking out his tongue. Then, Derek felt the younger man’s arm wrap lightly around his waist and pull him close for a quick kiss. The motion was casual, natural, and one that Derek returned without thought. “Sorry, not what we’d planned when I got back, huh? Let’s catch this witch fast so we can start our Christmas cuddle session, ‘kay?”

Derek raised an eyebrow at the comment. His boyfriend sure did have a way with words sometimes. “Christmas cuddle?”

“Hey, it is what it is.” Stiles shrugged innocently as he started to move away.

“I’m not calling it that.”

“Suit yourself, Sourwolf, but I’ve officially labelled it, and you can’t take that away from me,” Stiles said as he walked backwards toward the nearby trail. Derek half-expected him to trip on some invisible rock in the next few seconds. “Gonna say it all I want!”

He rolled his eyes as the younger man’s antics. “Go.”

“Christmas cuddle! Oh, and far be it for me to complain about seeing you in that t-shirt, but you do know it’s winter, right? We may live in California, and you may have some super-awesome internal wolfy furnace going, but I’m cold just looking at you. Where’s your jacket?”

“Go!” While he didn’t feel the chill as acutely, he didn’t need to be reminded about his fleecing by a greedy, blue-haired teenager.

After Stiles wave his acknowledgement and jogged out of sight, Derek turned back to join Scott. Their relationship may have started out roughly, but they’d fallen into a companionable pattern over the last few years. It was likely because of everything Scott had been through and his maturation, but Derek guessed part of it may have been out of respect for both their relationships with Stiles. Without much preamble, they quickly sectioned off their respective search zones, and fanned out into the thicker parts of the preserve. Derek had grown up here, had run and played amongst the trees and foliage so often that walking through it now stirred a sense of homecoming. Still, sometimes, there were things here that could still surprise him. Like the odd whiff of fear and panic he caught a few minutes after he’d split off from Scott. It was faint, probably non-existent for the newer wolves, but it was there, so out of place with the earthy scent of moss and soil. He started to follow it, his senses sharpening as he homed in on the potential prey. He hadn’t made much progress before he heard a howl off in the distance, and his entire body tensed, ready for action.

They’d found something!

Once he pinpointed the source, he was off, dashing through branches and over roots with a surety of stride that had been acquired from a lifetime of running these woods. He didn’t get very far though. He heard it first, a loud symphony of disembodied laughter all around him. Before he could stop and confront whatever it was, he caught a flutter of movement in his periphery, and then, he was flying, thrown through the air by an impact harder than anything in recent memory. He was out cold before he even landed.

(***)

He wasn’t unconscious for long. At least, he didn’t think he was, given that generations of werewolf evolution had refined his healing abilities to the point where he shouldn’t be. But however long it was, it was enough to find himself strapped to a board – or a crude table, perhaps – staring up at the flickering shadows of a stone ceiling. Or a cave? He honestly hated losing time like this and waking up in unexpected places, which, given who he was and where he lived, was an actual occupational hazard.

A whimper somewhere to his left drew his attention just then, and he tilted his head at an uncomfortable angle to take better stock of where he was, and with whom. Just within his field of vision, he could barely make out a small figure sat huddled inside a primitively constructed cage no higher than his hip. A wood fire burned beneath a big vat just a few feet away, thoroughly heating up whatever was inside if the bubbling sound was any indication.

“Hey,” he said quietly, if a little hoarsely, hoping the hunched figure would shift enough into the firelight for him to make out who it was.

The figure shuffled over, and Derek could see the tear-streaked face of a boy, probably no more than eight or nine years old. Stiles had said there’d been attempted kidnappings. It looked like one had succeeded.

“H-hello? You’re awake.”

“Yeah, I am.” He wasn’t good with children, barring the few cousins he’d played with when he was younger, yet that had been different. They’d been family. He knew this kid was scared, could hear it in the tremor of his voice and smell it in the dankness of the air, but he wasn’t sure what he could say to help with that. “I’m Derek. What’s your name?”

“A-Andy.”

“Well, Andy, if you give me a minute, we can get out of here and I’ll take you back to your parents.” He tried to sound reassuring, though he wasn’t sure it worked as well as he’d intended when he was tugging and testing the thick ropes tied around his chest, waist, and legs. They were tight, but he managed to slide a hand free enough to shift and start slicing away at the restraints with his claw.

“Just Mom,” the boy said quietly. “Dad left.”

“Okay, we’re going to find your mom then. I’m sure she’s really missing you right now.” He figured that keeping a calm tone and easy conversation going was as good a plan as any while he worked on the ropes.

Andy shuffled a little in his cage, his face dipping down again into the shadows cast by the nearby fire. “She’s working. She’s always working. She promised I’d get to see Dad, but she couldn’t take me, so I went to find him myself.”

Which might explain why the boy hadn’t been reported missing yet. There was some give to the rope by his right hip, so he tilted his head and tried to look over at the boy and hoped he properly projected the sincerity of his words. “That doesn’t mean she’s not missing you, Andy. I know she’s probably very worried. She – “

The stench assaulted him first, sour and rancid, before he felt the whole space shake with a reverberating thud. Andy quickly scooted back into the corner of his cage with a scared squeak, leaving Derek to turn and search out the source in the dim light. An old woman came into view near the foot of his table, posture bent and face haggard, each of her steps sending tiny shockwaves through the cave. Her long, gray hair hung in a greasy, unkempt mess, framing a crooked nose and a gap-toothed, mirthless grin. She resembled the picture Stiles had shown him on his phone, but the younger man had neglected to mention one thing. She was a fucking giant!

The whole cave suddenly felt cramped, and her looming presence caused his heartrate to spike. He worked faster on his ropes.

“Good dog. You’re too old and gristly for my liking, but if my lads want a pet, a pet they will get,” she said in a voice deeper than he’d expected. She patted his stomach dismissively as she passed, and he fought hard not cry out at the jarring, painful contact. “Now, where’s my little snack? Little boy for a little snack. Little boy snack.” She cackled at her own wit.

He heard Andy whimper again as the old, giant crone ambled her way over to the cage, and he wanted to tell the boy to be brave, to hold on because he was almost through his rope. Yet, as he was about to do just that, he caught the scent of metal and electricity in the air. It cut through the myriad of other unpleasant smells like an olfactory beacon, clear and crisp and a harbinger of something – or someone – familiar. He couldn’t help but smile a little at the arrival of the calvary, even as Andy shrieked when the witch pulled him roughly from the cage and shuffled over to the boiling pot.

Then, several things happened at once. First, voices that sounded like the disembodied laughter he’d heard earlier came from somewhere outside. This time, however, they were shouting out in distress, intermingled with the familiar voices of his pack. The cries gave the witch pause for a split second, just as he cut through the last of his restraints and pulled free. After that, he was up and leaping through the air, aiming to get Andy free of the old woman’s clutches and away from the fire. And he managed just that, wrapping his arms around the boy as he clawed at the large hand that held him. But he underestimated the reaction speed of the crone, and barely managed to turn his body to shield Andy before her other hand swatted his side. He landed with bone-cracking impact against the boiling pot, adrenalin enhancing his movements as he rolled quickly to avoid landing on the fire or getting splattered by the hot liquid in the toppling vat. He was pretty sure he’d probably cracked a few ribs, but they were already healing. Andy seemed none the worse for wear when he looked down, unhurt and safe in his arms still.

“My boys! What are they doing to my boys?” the witch wailed.

Derek tensed briefly, thinking the giantess would take her surprise and anger out on him. He readied himself for a fight, but instead, she turned and marched the other way, he and Andy seemingly forgotten. He eased himself up with a barely suppressed groan, and let the small body pressed against his chest slide down to his lap. He could hear the pack outside, the growls of the wolves and the foreign-sounding chants from Stiles, and he knew that they had it handled.

“You okay?” he asked as he gave Andy a good once-over.

The boy simply nodded, his whole body still trembling. Then, without a word, he leaned forward and hugged Derek as if his life depended on it. Not sure how else to respond, Derek hugged the child back.

That was how Stiles found them a few minutes later when he stumbled clumsily into the cave. After some coaxing, they both managed to talk Andy into finally letting go. Scott took it from there, coming in to take the boy away to find the Sheriff, who had been called to the area when Stiles had triangulated Derek’s location. Stiles waited a moment after Scott had left before he turned and threw himself into Derek’s arms.

“Oh, thank every deity I just prayed to you’re okay. Had me worried.”

Derek squeezed the warm, lithe body clinging to him like an octopus, and bent down to briefly nuzzle his partner’s neck. He breathed in the fortifying scent that was simply Stiles and used it to ground himself after the crazy events that had just happened. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to. I’m fine.”

“I know. You’re one tough son of a bitch, but the uncertainty always gets me.” Stiles pulled away and gave him a look with those ridiculously wide Bambi-like eyes that made Derek’s insides go warm. “And of course, you would go all superhero and save a child while we saved you. With the way the boy was holding on to you, I thought you’d replaced me with a cuter, newer model.”

Derek quirked up his lip into a lopsided, half-smile. “Never,” he returned easily. “If I did, I would at least try to get a good trade-in price for you.”

“Smartass.” As his comeback, Stiles smacked his arm with the back of his hand. He then slipped said hand into Derek’s, intertwined their fingers, and started walking out of the cave. “See if I ever send baddies back through an intercontinental gate for you again.”

“So, she wasn’t a witch?” Derek asked as he followed Stiles’ lead out of the cave

“Oh, no, she was a witch. The giantess witch, Gryla, and her sons, the Yule Lads. I don’t know how they got here, but I was working off of some quick and dirty research, so the best I could do was track down caves in the area, which is what the literature says she tends to favor, and find a spell to send her back to her native Iceland.”

Derek silently listened as Stiles explained what had happened, both grateful and proud – and not for the first or last time either – at the quick wit and resourcefulness of the guy he got to call his. They eventually emerged from the cave, and he immediately felt lighter the moment he could smell the fresh earth and foliage again. The sun was beginning to set, creating lengthening shadows of the redwoods and the oaks that stood like sentinels around them. And with that came a distinct chill in the air. He felt Stiles shiver at the lower temperature, and wished he’d had his jacket around to offer the other man. The jacket that he’d exchanged for …

With his free hand, he reached into his jeans pocket where he’d tucked the locket earlier, and –

Shit!

Without another thought, he turned and sprinted back into the cave. He quickly scanned the area and did not see the locket anywhere. His eyes then fell on the overturned pot and the still-burning embers of the woodfire. A dash of panic began to taint his actions, but he didn’t stop to quell it. Instead, he rushed over to the dying fire and started digging through the ashes. His hands burned and healed almost simultaneously as he dug desperately through the charred wood, an odd combination of frustration and helplessness clouding his judgement.

“Derek?”

He heard Stiles, but didn’t answer, mainly because his fingers wrapped around a clump of metal just then. He looked down at what used to be Stiles’ mother’s locket, the piece now misshapen by the heat and bearing no resemblance to what it used to be. He dropped the thing, both dejected and angry. This was supposed to be the year. This was supposed to be the Christmas where he would show Stiles how much the younger man meant to him by putting the care and thought into his gift that Stiles had always put into his. But everything… everything had been for nothing.

“Derek? What’s wrong? You okay?” Stiles approached and knelt beside him, looking ready to join him in whatever he was searching for.

He brushed the soot and ash off his hands, shook his head, and stood up. “Nothing. I’m good. Just thought I dropped something but I was wrong. C’mon, let’s go home.”

Puzzled, Stiles stood too, though he didn’t pry, and together, they made their way out of the cave once more, but not before Derek threw one last, longing glance at the pile of ashes.

(***)

“Oh, my god, I’m so stuffed,” Stiles said as he plopped down on the couch and rubbed his belly. “I might have to be rolled off to bed later because there’s no way I’m standing up.”

Derek smiled softly at the younger man’s dramatics, and joined him on the sofa. Christmas dinner had been an intimate one again between just the two of them, with Derek doing most of the preparation, while Stiles had ‘helped’. He didn’t mind though. He enjoyed their time together. The way they fit together, their ease with each other … it had all been hard-won, and he wouldn’t trade it for anything. The younger man had chatted animatedly throughout the meal and Derek had let him go on, wanting to prolong the whole thing because, if he was being honest, he was dreading what would happen afterwards: their gift exchange.

“Merry Christmas, Derek,” Stiles said, as if reading his thoughts. He reached over to the end table and grabbed an unevenly wrapped gift.

Derek stared at the thing for a moment, just knowing deep down it would be a typical Stiles present, all special and personal. Why did Stiles even stay with him? He must come across as an unthoughtful, unappreciative jerk. Slowly, he unwrapped the gift, and revealed a collage of artfully arranged photographs. There were trees and flowers and butterflies dancing on sunbeams across open trails. They were beautiful, more so in that Derek recognized where they had been taken: the preserve.

“You sometimes talk about how you grew up in the preserve,” Stiles explained. “How it’s a second home to you, and how you have all those memories with your family there. I know the memories are special, so I went and took some pictures during summer break. I hope these help you remember all those good times.”

Derek blinked away the prickling he felt in his eyes. Stiles may have assumed he was touched by the gift, which was fine. He didn’t need to know what Derek was really feeling. He didn’t need to know that in that moment, he thought Stiles really deserved so much better than him.

“Thank you. It’s perfect,” he choked out. “I – “ He didn’t know how to continue. What else could he say? “My present isn’t –“

He stopped. Stiles looked at him expectantly. Not finding the right words, he leaned over to the coffee table and grabbed the last-minute gift bag he’d filled the day before. “Here.”

He looked away while Stiles eagerly dug into the bag. He knew what was in there, and he didn’t need to see the lackluster reaction the younger man would have at the assortment of Reese’s candies he’d find.

“Oh, this is awesome, Derek!” Stiles exclaimed excitedly. “Holy shit, there’s a half pound peanut butter cup in here! Hello, Heaven!”

Derek felt Stiles’ arms wrap around him in gratitude, but he couldn’t find it in himself to return the gesture. The younger man seemed to notice and pulled back. “Derek?”

He turned and took in Stiles’ questioning gaze. He couldn’t do this. They complemented each other so well in everything, but somehow, in this, they were completely mismatched. “Doesn’t it bother you?” he asked in earnest.

“What?”

“My gifts. Doesn’t it bother you that my gifts are so … so bad. Yours are always so … so perfect.” It felt good to get that off his chest.

Stiles gawked at him as if he was speaking a foreign language. “Huh? But I think your gifts are perfect. And that’s not a lie. You can tell, right?”

True, Derek hadn’t heard any change in the other man’s heartrate to indicate otherwise, but no one could like his choice of gifts that much. “I just ... I wanted to show you how much I appreciate you, how much I care about you, the same way to do for me, especially with the gifts you give me. But I can’t seem to do that.” This was uncharted territory for him, this admission. He wasn’t used to revealing his insecurities like this. Yet, this was Stiles he was talking to, he reminded himself. Stiles, who never had any shame in revealing his every failure and weakness, and who gave his trust without fear of being hurt. Derek owed him the same. “I found your mother’s locket,” he finally said. “The one from the album you showed me. I found it, and was going to give it to you, but I lost it when we fought that witch last week. I’m sorry.”

He stared at the coffee table. He stared at the discard wrapping paper of the collage he’d just received. He started at everything but Stiles.

And then, “That’s what you were worried about? Not being able to show me you loved me?” Stiles’ tone was incredulous, and it was enough for Derek to turn his attention to the younger man again. “You’re an idiot, Derek,” Stiles continued. “For the record, your presents are awesome. But that’s not the point. You drive three hours each way to visit me on campus every other weekend. You cook Christmas dinner for us every year. You help me pack for college each fall. You drop everything and meet me in a forest, no questions asked, when I call. You even spent all night picking zombie guts out of my hair. If that doesn’t say ‘love’, I don’t know what does!”

To put an exclamation to his point, Stiles pulled him in for a long, lingering kiss. “I love you, Derek Hale, and I know you love me. You don’t need to give me things to show me that. You show me every day in the things you do. And that’s more than enough.”

Derek looked at the man sitting beside him, stunned and at a loss. “I –“

“It’s more than enough,” Stiles re-stated firmly. “Now, stop your self-flagellation, and show me how much you appreciate my gift by kissing me.”

Stiles pulled him in again, and this time, Derek did put everything he had into that kiss because the weight of those heartfelt words were slowly sinking in. He loved Stiles. And Stiles … Stiles knew that. He groaned in appreciation at the true gift he’d been given as he pushed the younger man down onto his back, bracing his weight on his arms as he ground their hips together. Fuck it, he felt like he’d really won the lottery in finding Stiles … because Stiles was right, he realized as he deepened their kiss, tasting and teasing the smart, sarcastic, and silly man beneath him.

This … This was more than enough.

#obsessedbutonline #stereksanta20 #*fic20 #*gifts20

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spencers-dria · 4 years

Text

Blood, So Much Blood

Someone To Stay Ch. 19

Spencer x fem reader

Content/Trigger Warnings: Gun, knife, blood, violence, sexual assault, NGL it get's pretty dark and twisty

You dance around your living room, slipping and sliding across the floor in your mismatched Christmas socks. You just got back from visiting your family for Thanksgiving. As much as you wanted to bring Spencer along, he had been called away on yet another case. Neither of you were thrilled, but you understood. You still bragged endlessly to your family about how wonderful he was and how much he cared about helping others. They understood as well. You seemed to win them over just with your stories of how the relationship got started.

But now you're back in your apartment, quickly cleaning up and putting out your decorations as you dance to the Christmas music station. Spencer had sent a quick text letting you know he would be back from the case tonight. You prepared for the fact that he might be too tired to spend time together, but you were not about to be caught unprepared, just in case.

The last month with Spencer has been magical. It was difficult to make time for dates with your schedules, but somehow he made it work. He always makes time for you, whether it means stopping by on his way home after his flight lands, just to kiss you goodnight, or a quick phone call after he gets to his hotel room before he promptly passes out. He had definitely fallen asleep on the phone once or twice. It was adorable and you didn't mind one bit.

A knock on the door sends your heart racing. Call it the honeymoon phase or whatever you like, but you were sure that he would never stop making you feel this way. You take a deep breath before swinging open the door, and you find yourself utterly speechless.

All you can do is stare, mouth gaping open as your eyes lock on Spencer. You don't even consider that you have yet to give any kind of opinion on his new look. You're snapped out of your daze as he stares down at his feet, nervously rubbing his hand along the back of his neck.

"Um 'M sorry...probably should have told you first. Or not cut it at all. I can put on a hat if it's that bad?" He mumbles toward the ground.

He looks up, watching you with doe eyes, waiting for any kind of reaction. You finally move, your hands reach up to feel the freshly shaven sides of his head before running through the fluffy locks on top.

"Don't you dare", you mutter under your breath before pulling at his neck until he meets your lips. He's too stunned, forgetting to move for a moment before you feel him return the kiss with equal enthusiasm, hands sliding to wrap around your waist, pulling you impossibly close.

You aren't sure when you made your way to the couch, but you find yourself sitting in his lap, running your fingers through his hair as you bite at his perfectly plump bottom lip. Your tongues tease one another with each kiss as your skin ignites underneath the touch of his hands as he runs them through your hair, over your back and down to your hips.

The two of you finally come up for air. You look into his eyes, tracing his jaw with your fingertips before speaking up, "we should probably..."

"Yeah" he nods in agreement.

You slip off his lap and cuddle up into his side as he wraps his arms around you. You both sigh in contentment. You had talked about your boundaries together, and had agreed to take it slow. It was difficult. It was an outdated notion, but it's what was best for you and he respected that completely.

"Look at us making out on the couch, we're like two overly hormonal teenagers," you can't hold in a giggle as you awkwardly hide your face in your hands.

You feel him tug at your wrists as he tries to look you in the eyes.

"Yeah about that, what got into you huh?" He bites his lip as he tries to hide a smirk, showing just how much he enjoyed it.

Your gaze drifts back to his hair. "Don't laugh at me okay?"

He puts on a serious expression but you can see he's already trying to hide a smile behind it.

"You know I loved your long hair right? It looked so good. And you've always been attractive to me. Never doubt that. But this..." You slip your fingers back into the longer hair on top, biting down on your lip to keep your smile form growing too big. "This is so incredibly hot! You are officially way out of my league Spencer Reid. I mean, more so than before. You're like...male model material!"

You can see the disbelief in his eyes but he still smiles and blushes at your gushing.

"Cut it out! Be serious, do you really like it?"

You hold his face in your hand, turning it towards you as you lean impossibly close, never once breaking eye contact.

"I am being deadly serious. I already showed you how I feel about it. But if you've forgotten I might have to remind you."

His blush deepened by about ten shades of red as he looked up with you with his classic boyish smile. Same old adorable Spencer. You opt for leaving a small kiss on his nose, and he looks at you with all the admiration in the world before leaning back over to nuzzle his nose against yours. He knows you love this. You're not sure why you enjoy it so much, but something about it feel so incredibly intimate.

You hum contently, enjoying the feeling as you take in the comforting smell of winter spices and pine. He had started picking out cologne that he knew you would enjoy. You had even sprayed some of it on his sweaters that you had stolen.

He wraps the two of you up in a blanket. The only sound in the room is the crackling of the fire you had lit not long before he came over. You stay nuzzled up together, not speaking, not kissing, just enjoying being with one another.

You open your eyes to look at him, and his eyes are closed as a smile of pure bliss graces his features.

“Y/N I..."

His eyes shoot open and he looks as though something has just startled him, despite there being no other sound than that of his own voice. He stands up, walking across the room before grabbing the remote and returning to your side.

"I-I...think we should watch a movie or something. Ya know? First Christmas movie of the season." He sounds so nervous and it breaks your heart. You wish he could read his mind, and make everything better. But you know not to push him. He always opens up when he's ready. You smile and nod. It's not a bad idea after all.

You convinced him to watch one of your family's favorites "A Christmas Story". He found himself laughing along with you at some of the funny but ridiculous moments: Flick getting his tongue stuck to the pole, the father receiving his leg lamp award, the duck for Christmas dinner.

You find your mind drifting to how much you want a family of your own. You hadn't discussed it with Spencer. He may not even want kids. You had purposefully avoided more serious topics in hopes that Spencer would stay. You couldn't risk losing him. But if he was going to be around for the long haul, shouldn't you make sure the two of you want the same things? You've seen how good he is with Henry, and it melts your heart every time. He really would be a wonderful father.

You're staring at him as the thoughts run through your head. For some reason, your mouth decided to speak without asking your brain for permission.

"Do you want kids?" The words are out before you can stop them. Your hand covers your mouth in hopes of shoving them back in, but its too late. You feel absolutely humiliated and terrified. You've done it. You've ruined this. He's going to run for the hills.

Except he doesn't. Instead he turns to look at you, a bright smile on his face. "Of course! Without a doubt. "

You feel yourself let go of the breath you hadn't realized you were holding as relief washes over you like a warm shower. He reaches over, intertwining his fingers with yours and slowly rubbing his thumb across the back of your hand.

"Do you?"

"Yeah. I didn't know if it was too early to talk about but I do... I really really do."

He places a kiss on top of your head before pulling you in closer as both of you turn your attention back to the movie. You knew that was all that needed to be said, for now. It was enough to know he wanted a family as much as you do. And you hoped that he could see that future with you in it.

_____________________________________________________________

It's your last day of work before your long awaited trip to Orlando with Spencer. You can't wait to finally take him to one of your favorite places. He loves Harry Potter almost as much as you do. And you already know he would appreciate all the small details that had been placed amongst the stores and rides. You look forward to hearing every single fact he can possibly share about each ride as you wait in the lines. You know you won't be bored for a single moment as long as he is by your side.

After putting on a clean pair of scrubs, you get in the car and begin your drive to work, soft Christmas music playing in the background as you hum along.

You make it all the way to 2PM before finding the time to take a lunch break. You decide to wander down to the cafeteria in the basement of the hospital, putting in your ear buds while the elevator makes its way down.

You hear your work phone make the familiar sound, letting you know it's out of range. This is always a relief, seeing as you won't be constantly bothered while you wait in line to order your food. It's always short lived, the beeps and calls returning the second you return to the floor with lunch, but you'll take any kind of break you can get.

While waiting in line, your mind wanders to the conversation between you and Spencer the night before. It was short, but the look in his eyes told you more than his words ever could. He truly cared about you. And you really believe he saw a long future with you.

As you make your way through the empty back halls leading to the elevator, you can hear an announcement being made over the speaks, though you can't make it out over the sound of your music. Another code blue in the CCU most likely.

You walk over to your spot at the nursing desk to pick up your water bottle. It isn't until you take out your ear buds that you realize how eerily quiet the floor is. Quiet. It's like a curse word in hospitals. Saying it will certainly bring on immediate doom.

You make your way around the floor. All of the patient doors are closed, as are the doors separating A and B side. The announcement must have been for another fire drill. It's just protocol. You continue to make your way down the hall looking for any other the nurses. The doctors. Therapists. Techs? It's a weekday. The floor should be like rush hour. Instead it feels like a ghost town, aside from the patients lying in bed in their rooms.

You get an unsettling feeling in your stomach. Your pace picks up as your search for anyone else turns into more of a panic.

Before you can enter into the staff breakroom, a chill runs up the back of your neck.

"Nurse Y/L/N."

You turn to see a family member of one of your former patients.

"Mr. Gray what are you doing here? Is everything okay? Do you need help finding someone?"

"I was looking for someone. But I just found her."

His voice is stone cold. Your eyes are locked on the movement of his hand has he raises it, revealing a gun that is now pointed directly at your head. He's only a few feet away. He's not close enough for you to hurt him in anyway or surprise him enough to run away. He's not so far that he could possibly miss if he pulled the trigger.

You work to slow your breathing and you feel your emotions switch off, allowing you to focus on sharpening your thoughts in the moment.

"If you need to talk to me, we can do that. Let's just sit down and talk ok?"

"NO! You've talked enough. My wife is dead because of you. You watched her die. You didn't help her. I lost the love of my life and it's all your fault."

He steps forward, leaning so close that you can feel his breath against your ear before he whispers "and now you're going to pay."

Your mind is racing as he grabs your wrist shoving you forward. You feel the steel of the gun on the back of your head as he orders you where to turn, leading you through several doors and hallways.

They would have called the police by now right? That must have been what that announcement was, some kind of lock down. They have to know. That's why you couldn't find anyone. That means help is on the way. But what if they don't find him in time? Find you in time?

In time for what you don't even know. He probably wanted to kill you. But if he only wanted to kill you on site he would have done it already. It's the way he's ordering you around, leading you to a second location that makes your stomach turn. What could he possibly do that's worse than death? You don't want to think about it. Poor Spencer has to. He deals with this every day at work. Spencer...Spencer!

You need him here. Silently in your mind you pray that he would find you and save you before you could be in any real danger.

Mr. Gray opens a door to a patient room, and pulls the blinds shut, keeping the gun trained on you the entire time. You look for something, anything that can help you. Spencer would know what to do. He would know how to get out of this. But you. You're just a nurse, with no FBI training. And you feel truly helpless.

"Get on the bed!" He yells. You feel like you could be sick. Tears threaten to break through, but you're determined not to show any signs of fear to this psycho.

"Now!" He raises his voice even louder as he presses the gun against your forehead.

You reluctantly lay down on the hospital bed, refusing to look anything but incredibly pissed off. Truthfully, you are mortified. You want to scream, yell, cry, but you don't make a sound.

He sets the gun down and pulls out some restraints usually kept in the hospital supply room, and he begins to tie your wrists and ankles to the bed. Then he pulls out a knife, dragging it along your jaw and down your neck, before placing it right above your heart.

He leans down to whisper "One wrong move and I will slice you up into little pieces."

You feel your body tense as you fight off every natural reaction to cry or scream. Instead you spit in his face.

He wipes it off with nothing but a smug grin on his face. He knows no matter what you do, he still has total control in this situation.

The knife makes its way down, and you hear the ripping of fabric as he cuts through your scrubs. Your muscles tighten at the sting of the cool air. Your eyes clench shut as he drag the blade up the inside of your thigh, just deep enough to break the skin. You soon feel the dribble of blood running down your skin, but this is far from over. He continues in this manner, leaving cuts on your legs, your stomach, your chest, anywhere that felt too intimate to be touched by a stranger.

Tears have broken through and are streaming down your face but you remain silent. You are determined to not give him the satisfaction of begging. You try not to think about the scars that will remain, unsure if you will even make it out of this room alive.

A hand slips inside your underwear and you try to close your eyes even more, hoping to block out every possible sensation. In your mind you are anywhere but here. You're curled up on the couch, watching the fire, Spencer by your side. Spencer, who would protect you at all costs. Spencer who you love.

You are snapped back to reality by the sharp pain in your lower abdomen. Your eyes fly open to the blade sinking into your skin. And the blood, so much blood. You can't hold back any more. Tears are pouring out as you call for help. You scream in pain. You scream so loud that it physically hurts. You scream until you lose every last ounce of energy within you. You call his name over and over, willing him to appear in front of you, if only to see him one last time before you slip into the darkness that is slowly taking hold of you.

"Spencer..."

A/N: So I included a pretty serious topic in this chapter. I know it seems like it kinda came out of no where. But I want anyone who has experienced sexual assault of any kind to know they are not alone. It is not your fault. And it is okay to call it what it is. Don't let anyone, including the little voice inside your head convince you that it is no big deal. It's okay to ask for help. It's better if you do. This doesn't have to be a friend or a parent if you're not comfortable with that. I have included the national sexual assault help line as well as the suicide help line and some other links. Never be ashamed to seek help. It takes a lot of strength.

Also, any of you who need to talk to me about anything are more than welcome to message me. I am here for you always.

Thanks for your support in reading my story, I love you all!

Fairytales1896 aka Spencer’s Dria

Resources:

National Sexual Assault Hotline: 800.656.HOPE (4673

https://www.rainn.org/about-national-sexual-assault-telephone-hotline

Human Trafficking Hotline: 1-888-373-7888

Suicide Hotline: 1-800-273-8255

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