#I have the bare bones 20 cell version that you can only read on from the state talking book library

[razzek]

I waaaaant but even with a grant I'd still have to make about $2k appear out of nowhere. ;_;

[name-me-regret]

If The World Was Ending 3/?

If The World Was Ending Chapter Three: California Dreamin’

Read on AO3.

- ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

“All the leaves are brown And the sky is grey I've been for a walk On a winter's day I'd be safe and warm If I was in L.A. California dreamin' On such a winter's day

Stopped into a church I passed along the way Well, I got down on my knees And I pretend to pray You know the preacher liked the cold He knows I’m gonna stay California Dreamin’...”

~California Dreamin’ - Barry McGuire

- ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

Tony sprang to his feet as he immediately rushed toward the suit that opened up for him. The skylight he’d had installed after invasion slid open and he blasted into the sky. “J, deploy the Iron Legion now!” As he did, he remembered Evan and he pulled up where the tsunami had hit and felt cold terror grip him as he saw that the Santa Monica pier had been taken out. “Shit! JARVIS, what’s my ETA?”

The HUD popped up a calculation. “At the speed you’re going, your estimated time of arrival should be three hours.”

That was unacceptable. He put more power into the thrusters as he could, and heard the BOOM as he broke the sound barrier somewhere over Lake Eerie. “At this speed ETA is two hours,” JARVIS intoned without having to be asked.

“What about the Iron Legion?” Tony was so relieved now that he hadn’t destroyed the rest of his suits after the Battle of Norco.

“ETA four minutes,” JARVIS told him. That was a much better time since when it came to natural disasters, especially involving large amounts of water, every minute, every second counted. Tony set his suit to auto-pilot for the remainder of the flight, making sure to call the FAA. He didn’t want any aircraft to accidentally stray into his path, and he’d be a disaster on top of a disaster.

“Give me eyes as soon as they reach the affected areas. Also, patch me into the channel the first responders use.” A few minutes later his HUD was filled with live feed from the suits, and he was rendered speechless at what he saw. Tony wished he could speed up past Mach 5 without the suit falling apart.

He decided to concentrate on what he could do (and not on a certain someone), and pulled up the stats on the suits that were functional. Out of the 35 suits he’d made between the invasion of Manhattan and the Mandarin Incident, there were nine viable suits. It was the Mark 20: Python, Mark 25: Striker/Thumper, Mark 28: Jack, Mark 33: Silver Centurion, Mark 34: Southpaw, Mark 36: Peacemaker, Mark 37: Hammerhead, Mark 38: Igor, and Mark 41: Bones.

Tony wished the Mark 35 would have survived, since the Red Snapper was made to save people during natural disasters; for example, rescuing victims trapped during an earthquake. He’d gotten the idea after the 7.1 earthquake that had hit LA, and now a year and a half later they’re hit with a tsunami. Unfortunately, Killian had destroyed it during the Battle of Norco.

Well, Southpaw would have to do, even if Red Snapper would have been better with its extendable and retractable claws. At least Hammerhead would come in handy, since it could remain submerged for long periods of time.

“This is Iron Man. I have multiple suits flying over the city and ready to help out. Just point me in the right direction and I’ll help where I can.” Almost immediately he was flooded with calls of trapped civilians, several inside and on top of their houses. He told JARVIS to concentrate on the ones trapped inside their houses, since there was another wave and the water was rising alarmingly fast. There were some people still trapped in their vehicles and unfortunately they couldn’t get to everyone on time.

He directed the suits where to go that they’d be the most useful. Tony heard dispatch call Swift Water Command, calling in a Code Three. Tony heard the commander say they were delayed and luckily J had a suit in the area. It was Bones and he saw the armor detach into several pieces and break through two roof vents to save a man trapped in the attic of his flooding house. As he watched the suits save people; Hammerhead dove for a little girl that had fallen into the water from off the roof of her house when she slipped, and Igor large enough that it could fly with several people hanging from it to take them to higher ground, he was even more glad he hadn’t destroyed the suits.

Sure he loved Pepper and would do anything for her, but with every life he saved, he remembered why he’d become Iron Man in the first place. He’d remembered those soldiers he’d laughed and joked with before they’d been gunned down, with his own weapons no less, and knew he’d made the right choice to not quit this. And maybe Pepper would come around and maybe she wouldn’t, but he refused to be guilted for doing something that saved people’s lives; even if at the times he was so sick and tired, and so inured he could barely move or breathe without something hurting.

It was more important to be able to help people, made him feel like he was alive for a reason. He’d told her three years ago, that he shouldn’t be alive if it wasn’t for a reason, and this was that reason. It wasn’t fighting Killian and aliens, but helping and protecting the people from those threats.

It was almost two hours later, after remotely piloting the other suits, that he was physically flying over the city. The water still hadn’t receded, and three more waves had hit, and hopefully that would be the end of it but he doubted it. Tony wanted to call Evan and make sure he was alright, but cell phone service was wonky at the moment. Besides, he didn’t want to tie up the line when there were others that needed actual help. Evan’s apartment was out of the flood zone, so he was sure he was fine. He was weirdly glad he had a serious blood clot condition that had him confined to his home, and not out there with the rest of the first responders. Tony wouldn’t be able to concentrate if he knew Evan was in danger.

He decided not to unpack all of that right now and quickly dismissed the rest of the live feeds of the Iron Legion, letting JARVIS take over. Although now that he’d seen some of what was required for something of this magnitude, he knew he needed to remake Red Snapper and more Iron Legion, probably a special force that could be used for natural disasters. While Southpaw was for natural disasters as well, it was mostly to protect the user from damage from natural disasters. He needed more armors that had emergency features, like medical features such as the ability to be used as a defibrillator or even carry oxygen or breathing equipment for CPR.

Tony headed toward the pier, since flooding was still extensive, and he heard calls earlier of first responders being needed at the Santa Monica Pier. As he neared where the worst of the flooding was, he saw that the whole pier was underwater. There saw also an actual Ferris wheel that was still standing after all three waves, but it wouldn’t hold for much longer.

As he neared, he saw that the wave was starting to recede, going in the other direction. He heard the ones at the Ferris wheel call the coast guard. ‘Coast Guard, Coast Guard. This is Captain Nash LAFD. We need a miracle at the pier. We need one quick.’ As the helicopter flew in, the Ferris wheel started to tip, and he blasted forward.

“Incoming, Captain Nash!” he called over the speaker on his suit, arriving in time to catch the Ferris wheel as it almost toppled. Tony saw that most of the people had been evacuated except for the one who was being airlifted and a woman with curly hair, as well as two first responders, both firefighters by the looks of it.

“Iron Man!” he heard someone call in surprise.

“Yes, I’ll sign autographs later,” he joked, “but right now this thing is coming down and I might not be able to hold it for long.” The two firefighters, one Hispanic man and another Caucasian woman had just finished lowering the woman and now looked at each other, unclipped from their lines and jumped, landing feet first in the water. “Ten out of ten!” Tony called, “now let’s go go go!” They scrambled onto the speed boats as Tony grunted as the debris hit it hard and it started to put a strain on the armor. When he saw they were clear, he let it drop as he flew out of the way barely in time from getting knocked down by it.

He met them at the entrance of the pier by the sign that read ‘•Yacht Harbor• SPORT FISHING •BOATING Cafes’, the water still high enough that it reach most of their calves. If he’d been in any armor before the Mark 8, he’d have thought twice before landing in the water. However the Mark 43 was a better version of all the armors that had come before. He wanted to see if anyone needed help.

“Iron Man,” he heard someone call. Tony turned to see a stern looking man in his early fifties with a helmet on his head and the red vest that declared him a fire captain. This must be Captain Nash. He was wet and obviously tired, but there was still a certain amount of authority to the set of his shoulders. He had the kind of presence Howard had given off, but tempered with something softer Tony couldn’t identify.

“That’s me,” he said as he lifted up the face plate but refrained from stepping out of the suit. He didn’t want to get his shoes wet, and besides, this man appeared to be at good six feet and even if it was only two or three inches, he hated feeling short. Especially when it was from a man that reminded him if even just a tiny bit of Howard. “But just Tony, please. What can I do for you, Captain?”

Nash extended his hand, and Tony took it without hesitation. He had more respect for first responders than any bureaucratic asshole that wanted to shake his hand and play nice for the cameras. “Bobby Nash of the 118. Thank you for the assist,” giving his gauntlet covered hand a firm shake. Tony liked the sincerity in his voice.

“It was no problem, Cap. I didn’t really do much,” he assured. The man’s lips quirked a bit, whether in annoyance or amusement, it was hard to tell. Bobby Nash had one of those faces that gave almost nothing away. “Do you need anymore assistance?”

The woman opened her mouth but Bobby held a hand to stop her. The woman’s nametag, which was surprisingly still on, read Bosko, and the man had Diaz on his. Tony wondered why that sounded familiar. “We have a missing member of Firehouse 136, Captain Ronnie Cooper. There’s also a lot of people trapped and missing. I had thought I heard that Iron Man was helping out, and it’s nice to see it’s true.”

“Sure am, wherever it’s needed.” He’d already been able to help a lot of people and hoped to continue as long as his body and the power supply on his armors allowed. “I’ll keep an eye out for Captain Cooper, and if you need help with anything, give me a holler. There are several other suits flying over the city. So, even if I’m not nearby, my co-pilot JARVIS will be able to assist you if I can’t.”

He gave the man a salute that wasn’t meant to be at all mocking, and then the faceplate snapped shut before he blasted into the air. Tony wanted to make sure there weren’t any locations that had been damaged that could potentially become deadly. The last thing he needed was for the water to catch on fire if there was any gas spillage, and he expected it’d be a terrifying sight.

“J, try Evan’s phone,” he said. “Also, bring up satellite images of Hawaii. I don’t want to be blindsided in case they were hit as well.”

“Bringing up images right now, sir. Also, I’m getting no response from Mr. Buckley’s phone.” This made Tony worry, since Evan always answered his phone (even when he called him an old man for calling and not texting). He couldn’t do anything though, since he was needed right where he was. Tony couldn’t just rush to Evan’s apartment, there was no flooding in the area, and there were people in need of help. So, he reluctantly continued on.

“You better be safe, Evan,” he muttered.-

[platonic-plots]

Seven. [i]

Request/Summary: “Can you write a story about Shield rescuing a teen being used as a Hydra weapon because their telekinetic ability and fighting skills. Hydra basically raised her from a toddler and don't even use her real name just a number. *next part of this request will be written into a part 2 of this fic so go straight to the story below if you don’t want spoilers :)* Now that she's free she escapes shield and starts hunting/killing all Hydra while running from shield(Team has to stop her) But they can't kill her because just a kid and want her on the team. Teen is like a mini John Wick if you want a mental image btw.”

Pairings: n/a; reader is platonic w everyone

Words: 1309

Warnings: tiny bit of violence

Specific time/Important info: phil is the director of shield again

Wake up at 05:00. Train at 05:30. Eat at 13:00. Train at 13:30. Water break at 20:00. Train at 20:15. Stop at 02:30. Sleep and repeat. 

That was how your day should have gone. It was how most days went at the relatively tiny Hydra facility you were based at, unless you were forced, at literal gunpoint, into the field. You were an inhuman, which made the men at Hydra assume you didn’t need the same amount of food and rest as them to be able to function. They were wrong; you were a bag of bones. They didn’t care, though, because as long as your telekinesis could work, the rest of your body would just have to wait. Being with Hydra since you were two, you had no idea what living life on the outside was like so you couldn’t argue as you didn’t have a clue what the alternative would be. You’d always been taught that Hydra was the way to go, that Hydra was the only option, that Hydra were the good guys, but even you weren’t stupid enough to believe them. 

They tried hijacking your mind into trusting them, but it only damaged your abilities since they revolved around your mind. They damaged them quite a bit, actually; if you felt an extreme amount of fear or stress, your skills would either stop or become temporarily uncontrollable. Still, you were their best weapon: taking away your powers would put them in their worst position yet. So your thoughts - no, your opinions were your own. Thoughts were what enabled your powers, meaning they were practically owned by Hydra. 

You were aggressively woken up before usual, and you were dragged out of your cell. Barely having time to think, you stumbled into people and walls, not yet lively enough to pay attention. What you did know, however, was that something was dangerously wrong. This had never happened before. There was a rush of everything: people, orders, movement. You couldn’t handle it and, within seconds, you had tripped over your own two feet and you were laying on the ground. That’s when the gunshots began; it was like someone had been waiting for you to get out of the way. Seemingly coming from all directions, the bullets pierced the air above you, whilst your mind tried to piece together what was happening. 

You noticed the number Hydra agents who had previously been guarding you had at least halved since they had either retreated or unintentionally joined you on the floor. Still entirely clueless, you chanced a fearful glance at the situation above you. There were a small group of people you didn’t recognize immediately. Looking closer, the man at the front sparked a hint of realization. You knew him. It was Phil Coulson. He was the man who Hydra had relentlessly attempted to convince you to hate, but they hadn’t succeeded. You always believed Hydra were wrong and Shield were right, no matter what. Disobeying Hydra’s orders had been impossible, but disobeying their beliefs was always optional.

Eventually, the gunshots became few and far between, until they stopped altogether and the corridor was silent - apart from your ragged breathing. You were too petrified to move and you had no idea what to do or where to go. Hearing footsteps nearing your body, you tensed immediately.

From the corner of your eye, you saw Phil Coulson crouch down beside you. “It’s okay, don’t worry. You’re safe, y/n.” He gingerly placed a reassuring arm on your back.

You flinched. “M-my name is Sev-Seven.” You pointed at one version of the number that had been etched into your collar bone. The digit was scattered in the form or burns and scars over your body, the act of permanently forcing it onto your skin had become almost a past time for the Hydra agents.

As he looked at you, his eyes filled with something you’d never seen before. It was like he felt sorry for you. “I’m here with Shield. Do you know who we are?” His voice seemed kind, comforting. You weren’t used to it.

“You’re th-the good guys.”

He smiled warmly. “We’re here to take you someplace safe, but we have to leave quickly. Can you stand?” Phil offered his hand to help. Trying to lift your weight, you realized you were too drained to help yourself up. The agent noticed your struggled and asked if you were okay with him picking you up. After a small nod from you, your body was in his arms and he was talking into what looked like a tiny speaker the other Shield agents.

The winding maze of corridors finally led you to the exit of the Hydra facility. You couldn’t remember the last time you left this base. While Phil walked on, you could hear voices from outside which grew louder with each step. You silently wondered to yourself; what was it like to live anywhere but here? The doors were wide open and you had to squeeze your eyes shut and cover them with your hands to protect them from the light. The sound when you were in clear view of everyone was almost non-existent. Although you weren’t looking, you could feel a number of gazes on you. By the time your eyes had adjusted, almost everybody was back to their business and only a couple of people still had their eyes fixated on you.

Phil kept on walking until the two of you reached a giant plane, which he proceeded to embark. “This is the quinjet.” He didn’t walk much further, he stopped and placed you down on a bench next to some sort of medic.

The man glanced at a small, sealed white pod a few meters away from the three of you. “Shouldn’t she be in th-” He was stopped mid-sentence.

“We went over this in the briefing, Sanders. Her powers don’t work if she’s experiencing an extreme amount of distress, if that’s what you mean. I think, given the circumstances, y/n’s current situation has that qualification. Clear?” As Agent Coulson talked, your eyebrows furrowed a little bit - you still didn’t know why he referred to you as ‘y/n’.

“Y-Yes sir.” The medic looked quite sheepish. He then picked up something you’d never saw before, a wide piece of material attached to a thin tube and a small electronic reader, and he tried to put it around your arm. Your reaction was instantaneous - spending most of your life with Hydra had led you to have no reason to trust someone or something so unknown so quickly. You moved your body as far away from the medic as the bench would allow, almost landing you a spot on the director’s lap. Pulling your knees up to your chest, you looked at the man with more than just a hint of fear in your eyes and your breathing pattern became more uneven.

“Christ, Sander’s. I think a little bit of communication before you started wouldn’t have hurt anyone. Go take a break.” 

“I was just trying to take her blood pressure, it wasn’t a big de-” The Director’s glare silenced him and he left.

“I’m sorry about him, he’s new. And nervous.” He gave a small smile. The only response you gave was a stifled yawn. Realizing it was still only the early hours of the morning, and that you’d probably been pushed to your limit for everyday of the past decade, Phil figured it’d be a smart idea to give you somewhere to sleep. 

Once you were under the unfamiliar comfort of warm sheets, your eyes drifted closed. A hint of a smile attempted to lift the corner of your lip as one of the thousands of thoughts in your head surfaced. Maybe, just maybe, you were safe - at least for the time being.

send me an ask if you want to be tagged in future fics, or just future parts of this fic :) also send me an ask if you want to request an imagine (I’m currently in the middle of writing 2 hunger games fics and 1 supernatural one :)) thanks for reading !!

[abundantchewtoys]

HS Epi 2: Meat p9 reaction

Let's see what Rose is up to. :P No, seriously, this might just happen. Just for us to switch back immediately afterwards to John.

The events of the Masterpiece are so important, though, I'd thought they'd happen near the climax to the epilogues. Unless the epilogues are shorter than I'd thought of course. There's still Homestuck 2, and wouldn't it just be something, for the part of Meat that takes place on Earth C to build up to that.

---

OOooh, this counts as the start of Epilogue 2, huh? So... I suppose that means Mean encompasses several epilogues, even if the chapter count keeps incrementing. If this were Homestuck proper, the Epilogues & Prologue would have had separate titles, too.

Prologue : yeah, i had a feeling that was going to come up again someday. Epilogue 1 : Rumble in the Pumpkin Patch Epilogue 2 : MY MASTERPIECE.

"If you were one of the haters and fools who saw Lord English’s masterpiece circulating through the black veins of the dark web," So, from starting the first sentence I get the idea that we won't be changing perspective just yet. But John hasn't seen the masterpiece, so he wouldn't be impressed.

"and were rendered agog by its majesty, then you probably have a pretty good sense of what happened next." ... Hah! Yeah, but Andrew won't be pulling a Hivebent on us here... will he? I'd really like some more succulent details.

"You probably also wouldn’t be rendered that much additionally agog if you were told it didn’t happen precisely as conveyed by the young Lord’s expertly produced claymation theater." OOoooooOOOOHhhhh, interesting yes. ... Well, unless the narration will now drily inform us that the events did not happen to clay figures but actual people. That much, we already could guess.

... Ya know, I wonder. The sprites squared never featured in Act 7 because back when he wrote and produced the animation, they weren't part of the story yet. Could this mean that Andrew worked out the events of the Masterpiece beforehand, and only later thought of things like Arquiusprite emerging from Lil Seb, and Gamzee being dissected? ... It would be a grand psyche if Lord English turns out NOT to contain the soul sludge from Dirk, Equius and Gamzee, but uh, yeah, that probably won't be the case. We (the MSPA Reader) already had a mental breakdown about this.

"Would it be that surprising if the first four heroes weren’t immediately captured in the juju," ... YES. YES THAT WOULD BE SURPRISING. ... THEY DIDN'T GO IN WILLINGLY DID THEY? ... Did they exchange pleasantries (or unpleasantries) before Caliborn captured them. ... This can't have been a joint plan they worked out to 'save' Caliborn from becoming a mindless mobster kingpin chained by providence into doing Paradox Space's dirty work.

"Would it raise any eyebrows if the action turned out to be a bit sloppier than that?" Sloppier as in... less coordinated? Well, these are the same kids who went Game Over in another timeline, I can see how. Unless the narration means, sloppier action as in, more stilted, broken up by banter and revelations being exchanged.

"A bloody"- ... Bloody? They weren't killed first, were they??

"-nose here." Ah. "A stray wedgie there. Someone trips on a cape." So, more like school yard scuffles instead of boss battles then. Like Caliborn & John's first stand off.

"stray honks from the sidelines." Useless minions are a pain, eh, Caliborn?

"Would it rock anyone’s world to discover the stop-motion feature did not treat this battle royale with the utmost fidelity?" Not if THIS is the extent of the differences, no, that's more expansion than contradiction, after all. It would just mean Caliborn's version was more succinct, akin to Doc Scratch' white lies.

"No one who witnessed the spectacle online would react to these discrepancies with much surprise. But you are not such a witness. You are still John Egbert," Narration, I don't think you quite understand what POV means. :P Really would like to see later on that Andrew's ghost is, well, ghost writing all of this in the dreambubbles.

"and you had no idea what sort of raucous teen pandemonium to expect when you zapped into the lair of your nemesis to throw down. Which is why you were completely blindsided when, upon feeling overwhelmed by the melee, Caliborn sprung his gambit on you and your three best friends to even the odds." You were completely blown away by this stunning revelation. Really, the juju, really? :P Rose didn't tell you about THIS, did she, and you should use a moment to contemplate that. You know, as you are sucked into oblivion until it's time to emerge from the other end. Guess his/our perspective will be ending here, then, after he's finished getting sucked into the juju? And only when they team back up with the B2 kids later, will he learn that his attempt to stop LE before he became that very monster, caused it in the first place.

"He opened his little red chest, and out came his white, house-shaped juju, levitating there, threatening to behave as the weapon many treasure hunters throughout history have described it to be." Ah, but do the descriptions do it justice, does it really do what Caliborn claimed in his claymation.

"Upon a second look, it’s not quite white though. It’s colorless, null. A house-shaped hole in your confining reality. A hole that insists on being filled." Until I read the "being filled", I thought that maybe they'd actually end up in blankspace somehow. Then again... The juju that John got his retcon powers from should've chronologically already been filled, and it was still see-through.

"You tried to resist its overwhelming pull, but to no avail." Okay, so yeah, this is still happening.

"Not negating your powers, your strength to resist, so much as it seemed to overwrite them." It's basically retconning his powers, where retconning is used in the same context as the effect he has when he zaps to an earlier moment on the timeline: he overwrites what happened before.

"You landed in the abstract prison it contains face-first, alone, and with a force that made you flip over a few times and skid along by the flat of your chin." Oh wow. Okay, they're actually going to be spending at least SOME conscious moments in the juju. ... So, might that be also how John got granted his powers then, a conscious decision made by the four individuals trapped in the juju? It's been theorized before that John's retcon powers are a combination of the 4 B1 kids' aspects: he travels through Time and Space, creates new alpha timelines (new Light, as in fortune)... Also, free as the Breeze (Breath) something something.

I'm pretty sure how he landed was akin to Vriska's slides at the hands (fists) of Kanaya & John.

Blaperile has a good point - would John still have his powers after past John got his? Or were they an ontological paradox to begin with? That would suck, though he might still find a way to travel back to Universe C regardless. For one, there's the possibility to travel through the Furthest Ring and reach the old B2 session.

"You groped for your glasses instinctively, finding them in two cracked halves. You cradled their remains as you looked up." Wow, his glasses were broken?? Eesh, another childhood treasured heirloom lost. Guess we now find out if godhood grants 20/20 eyesight regardless of eyewear. ... Maybe he needs to reach his next god tier first. I'm reminded of Jake getting his 'eyes' knocked off during [S] Dirk: Rise Up.

"The blurry, distorted face of your laughing nemesis" Nay on the 20/20 part then. Though the distortion might be due to Caliborn grinning maniacally.

"was the last thing you saw before the chest door slammed shut and plunged you into textual obsolescence." Oh, so John can 'see' outside the juju then.

"And here, you are now stuck." Stuck in a house-shaped object. A home, if you will.

"You will not emerge from this holding cell, from an outside perspective, for quadrillions of years." Implying, then, that that is Lord English' own age? Or perhaps, the span covered by the Green Sun's influence?

"It is not long at all until you begin to wish you had brought something to read." Pfffff. Guess John's sylladex contents were pretty bare bone, or he had no access to it. Also, it would seem he's separate from the other kids, damn. If he could've talked with them, he could've at least apologized for his (and post-retcon Rose's) mistake in person, before they started their prison sentence.

[sherristockman]

20 Tips for 20 Years Dr. Mercola By Dr. Mercola To help commemorate 20 years of offering the most up-to-date health information we can, here are 20 tips to help you on your journey. The topics are all-encompassing, so while you may not be able to do all of them right now, beginning with a few will improve your overall health, as well as your sense of well-being. What to Do More of or Get More of to Optimize Your Health 1. Get eight hours of sleep every night. You’ve heard it since you were a kid but that eight hours of shut-eye is serious business. Believe it or not, adequate sleep can make you smarter, skinnier and happier; it helps you assimilate and deal with the ins and outs of life and process information on multiple levels. You end up consuming more calories when you don’t get enough sleep. Your memory suffers and your risk for depression increases because your brain hasn’t had enough time to sort out what is and isn’t important. Your risk of anxiety rises, and with it, coping mechanisms that often involve food. Even your immune system takes a hit. Protect your hours of sleep like you do your bank account. You’ll be richer for it. 2. Get adequate vitamin D and omega-3s, and test your levels. Deficiencies in these two essential nutrients are causing untold damage to the health of millions of Americans. In fact, 85 percent of Americans aren’t getting enough “D” to help fight bone loss, cognitive decline, rheumatoid arthritis and abnormal cell growth, which are just a few of the functions vitamin D helps with. To figure how much you need, have your levels tested and be sure they are maintained at between 40 and 60 ng/mL year-round. Regular sun exposure is your best source of vitamin D, but supplementation may also be necessary for some people. Omega-3s are polyunsaturated fatty acids (PUFAs), which you need for healthy digestion, blood clotting, memory, muscle strength, vision, heart health and so much more. A deficiency is implicated in cognitive decline and may be a factor in 100,000 premature deaths each year. The Omega-3 Index Test1 can help you determine your level (ideally it should be above 8 percent) and is available from several labs. Excellent sources of animal-based omega-3s include wild-caught Alaskan salmon, sardines, anchovies and krill oil. 3. Get moving. Sitting is a huge part of modern life. In fact, the national median of adults with little to no physical activity other than their jobs is 22.6 percent, according to the United Health Foundation.2 More than 10,000 studies attest to the fact that sitting is a big risk factor for not just illness but premature death. Walking just one hour a day, the equivalent of about 3 miles, will go a long way (pun intended) toward optimizing your health. You’ll gain greater stamina, more energy and even more confidence, along with cutting your risk for several types of disease. Ideally, aim for 10,000 steps a day and cut your sitting time to three hours or less daily. 4. Grow your own food. The best way to guarantee you’re eating truly healthy foods like vegetables, herbs and seeds is to produce them yourself. You may be surprised how easy it is to start with organic tomato, beet or lettuce seeds for growing food right at your fingertips. It’s very satisfying, plus you don’t have to worry about genetically engineered (GE) foods laced with harmful pesticides. 5. Get adequate sun exposure. Humans make thousands of units of vitamin D within minutes of whole-body exposure to sunlight,3 but, unfortunately, 9-to-5 jobs keep most people indoors. Regular sun exposure is important not only for adequate vitamin D production but also much more, including boosting your immune system, regulating your circadian rhythm, lowering high blood pressure, improving your mood and even lowering your risk of many cancers, including skin cancer.4 Safe exposure to sunshine is possible by understanding your skin type, the UV strength at the time of exposure and your duration of exposure. Always avoid getting burned, but do make sure you spend a sensible amount of time with your bare skin exposed regularly. What to Eat More of to Optimize Your Health 6. Eat more fiber. It may not make sense until you think about it, but when the foods you eat hang around in your system (aka colon) for too long, it begins accumulating toxins that can potentially end up causing colon cancer. The foods you eat provide needed nutrients for your body’s health, but then they need to move through and out of your system. That’s where fiber, especially from vegetables, nuts and seeds such as flax and chia seeds — not grains — come in handy. Fiber “sloughs” your intestinal walls to speed up movement. Drinking adequate water helps the process, as well. Fiber is not only beneficial for lowering your cancer risk but also reduces your risk of chronic disease like diabetes and heart disease. It’s even good for your lung function. How much fiber do you need? I believe about 50 grams per 1,000 calories consumed is ideal. 7. Eat more fish. As you may know, protein is essential for health. You only need to eat 10 percent to 35 percent of your daily calorie intake from protein, however, and many Americans consume much more than that. Trading out some of the beef you eat for fish is an excellent way to get adequate protein without getting too much, which can be worse than a deficiency. However larger fish are nearly always contaminated with mercury and other toxins. Exceptions would be wild-caught Alaskan salmon, sardines, anchovies and herring are cold-water fish that offer healthy fats, including omega-3s, without high levels of pollutants. Make sure the fish you eat is wild-caught, not farmed, low in mercury and other pollutants and responsibly harvested. Marine Stewardship Council (MSC) certification5 and Fishwise help eliminate guesswork on what’s healthy and sustainable. If opting for a supplement, krill oil offers many of the same benefits as eating fish, and even more benefits than fish oil. 8. Switch to American grass fed certified. That goes for milk and butter as well as meat, so when you buy these products you know, as studies have indicated, you’re getting optimal essential minerals and antioxidants, as well as fatty acid composition. Organic grass fed foods are also free of antibiotics and other drugs used in concentrated animal feeding operations (CAFOs). Antibiotic-resistant disease has become a major public health hazard, so buying organic meats is should something you take into consideration. The Grassfed Exchange has a list of producers who sell organic and grass fed meats across the U.S. Also, check out RealMilk.com and the Cornucopia Institute's egg report and dairy scorecard. 6 Certification by the American Grassfed Association is the highest assurance you can have that the food is authentically raised to the highest standards. In addition, support U.S. grass fed producers. 9. Make fermented foods. Fermented foods provide your body with beneficial microbes, counteract inflammation and control the growth of disease-causing bacteria. All you need is a Mason jar or two to get started. Your gut houses about 85 percent of your immune system, mainly because 100 trillion beneficial and pathogenic bacteria live there and play important roles in your body’s functions. When your GI tract is not properly balanced, a wide range of health problems can appear, including allergies and autoimmune diseases. Here’s a tutorial to start you on your way to better gut health. 10. Grow sprouts. If you haven’t heard about the incredible health benefits of eating sprouted broccoli, bean or sunflower sprouts, it might be helpful to learn that, compared to the considerable vitamins and antioxidants in full-grown vegetables, the micro version (i.e., sprouts) is like veggies on steroids. Sunflower seed and pea shoots are about 30 times more nutritious than organic vegetables. Best of all, growing your own is super easy, quick, cost effective and doesn’t require a lot of space. For instructions that will help you start on the fun and nutritious journey, be sure to read sprout-growing 101. What to Avoid or Reduce to Optimize Your Health 11. Avoid lectins. Lectins are carbohydrate-binding proteins you find in many plant-based foods, such as wheat and other grains, beans and similar legumes, and nightshade veggies such as tomatoes and peppers. Many are proinflammatory and neurotoxic, and may increase blood viscosity, interfere with gene expression and disrupt endocrine function. That’s why dried beans must be carefully cooked, and never eat them raw. Sprouting and fermenting will also dramatically reduce the lectin content of foods. 12. Avoid fluoride. In the U.S., 57 percent of youth between the ages of 6 and 19 years have dental fluorosis, a condition in which your tooth enamel becomes progressively discolored and mottled due to overexposure to fluoridated drinking water. Dental fluorosis is an outward sign that fluoride is damaging the body. A forethinking chemist asserted that water fluoridation was tantamount to committing “public murder” back in 1937, sadly confirmed with a sharp rise in cancer deaths implicating fluoride soon after the practice started. Choose non-fluoridated toothpaste and consider a fluoride-removing water filter. The three types of filters that can remove fluoride are reverse osmosis, deionizers (which use ion-exchange resins) and activated alumina. 13. Avoid microwaves, especially with plastic containers. Depending on what product you’re using, your plastic might contain phthalates, a type of “gender-bending” chemical causing males of many species to become more female, along with many others. Microwaving food in a plastic container puts your food in contact with phthalates and other chemicals that have leached out during the heating process. Instead, use a glass container and cover your food with a paper towel, a coffee filter or a glass lid set on at a slight angle for steam to escape. Even better, banish your microwave altogether. Microwaves heat food by causing water molecules in it to resonate at very high frequencies and eventually turn to steam, which heats your food. While this can rapidly heat your food, it also causes a change in your food's chemical structure and destroys many vital nutrients. 14. Limit your protein intake. Protein is essential for health because it helps build muscle, maintain healthy cells and regulate your metabolism, to name a few of its many functions, which is why it’s called the “building blocks of life.” But Americans consume the most meat per capita in the world — more than 175 pounds of pork, poultry and beef per year, which exceeds what is wise for optimal health. People whose protein consumption is 20 percent or more their total caloric intake have a 400 percent higher cancer rate, and a 75 percent higher risk of mortality. Protein is important, but balance is important, too. For optimal health, I believe most adults need about 1 gram of protein per kilogram of lean body mass (not total body weight), or 0.5 grams of protein per pound of lean body mass. 15. Reduce EMFs. No doubt about it: Exposure to EMFs, or electromagnetic fields, is a given if you use a cellphone. One study showed that those who logged the most time on their cell phones were twice as likely to develop glioma compared to those who used them the least.7 Learning disabilities, altered brain metabolism and DNA damage are some of the hair-raising outcomes. Lower your exposure to all electronics whenever possible, but use particular care with your cellphone, portable phone, Wi-Fi router and modem. You can reduce your exposure by shutting off your Wi-Fi at night, keeping cellphones in airplane mode unless using them, using the speaker phone and using a selfie stick when talking on your cellphone. Things to Eliminate to Optimize Your Health It’s hard to eliminate things from modern-day life that are so ingrained into society that getting rid of certain unhealthy factors are not just inconvenient but impossible. But when you understand the toll hanging on to certain unhealthy things and how it can (and does) negatively impact your life, it often becomes more doable, and even imperative, such as the following: 16. Give up nicotine for life. You probably already know smoking causes cancer, and other forms of nicotine and tar are every bit as dangerous. But did you know it is one of the factors in the development of Alzheimer’s? In fact, one study showed smokers to have a 45 percent higher risk of developing dementia than nonsmokers.8 Show this study to your kids and grandkids. 17. Get rid of nonstick cookware. Here’s why: poly- and perfluoroalkyl substances (PFAS) used to create these surfaces are toxic, both in your body and in the environment. You may have noticed bits that come loose when you’re stirring, and realized they’re going into someone’s body, and toxic fumes, even if you can’t smell them, are, too. Instead, use ceramic or enameled cast iron pots, pans and skillets to do your cooking. 18. Consider getting rid of your mercury fillings. But maybe you should first consider what mercury fillings may be doing to wreck your health. The amalgam fillings put in place by dentists in the U.S. are 50 percent mercury, the vapors of which pass through cell membranes, across your blood-brain barrier and into your central nervous system. Studies show they cause serious psychological, neurological and immunological problems. You can have mercury fillings removed by a biological dentist and find more information here. 19. Give up soda. Countless individuals are making strides toward a healthier lifestyle, but one of the smartest things you can do if you haven’t already is ditch soda. There’s a link between soda consumption and obesity, as well as liver damage, heart disease, diabetes and osteoporosis. Making the switch to water could be the most influential health decision you’ve ever made. Whatever you do, don’t start drinking diet soda, as it’s even worse. It’s linked to stroke, dementia, depression and neurological disorders due to the aspartame content, and it may make you gain weight instead of lose it. Be informed about what you’re really putting in your body. You won’t believe how much better you’ll feel. 20. Avoid sugar. Evidence suggests excess sugar is a foundational cause of diabetes, obesity and most chronic degenerative diseases, including Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s, not just an exacerbating factor. You can lower your risk of premature death simply by limiting your intake. Once you more fully appreciate the dangers of sugar, you may finally be more motivated to mostly eliminate it from your diet. It may be difficult in the beginning, but once you cut down on added sugars and other net carbs (total carbs minus fiber), which will allow your body to start burning fat as its primary fuel again, the sugar cravings will disappear and you will not have to struggle to abstain from junk foods any longer. Research stevia as an alternative. What’s in It for You? It’s unfortunate that along with all the options we’re offered in grocery stores, many of them are manufactured with something else in mind besides your health. Our aim is to expose corporate, government and media misinformation that diverts you away from what’s truly best for your health. Unless you actively pursue alternative answers for health and well-being, you’ll most likely be swept into corporate America’s loudest, most persistent answer to every problem, from headaches to obesity to cancer: drugs and medical procedures. We’ve partnered with key organizations also dedicated to educating the public on important health issues, and even push for initiatives that will better public health and the environment while helping you improve your health, naturally.