#I just destroyed his ass and went back to my cult

[aychama]

I killed Kallamar in like 2 seconds, skipping his dialog and everything because 3 of my cult members died and I just wanted to get back as soon as possible lmao-

What even is consistent art style?

[ghosts-and-glory]

Imma be honest, Narinder deserved purgatory more than his siblings. I'm glad you gave him the fate he deserves, and I'm excited to see what horrifying abomination had taken his place in the cult. (I desperately hope it's Nothing There from Lobotomy Corporation, but that's wishful thinking lol.)

I’m sorry bestie but I’m not the Nari anti you think I am, I just like putting my faves through the horrors™️

In writing tragedy I want moments of catharsis. Narinder is a character destroyed by his own actions and punished beyond human comprehension. I don’t have a desire to write his infinite torture, more to play with the questions the post game leaves me with. I honestly can’t help but read the stories Narinder and his siblings as one of tragedy, where they are ripped apart by their flaws and reduced to play things in the cult.

Honestly what we know about the crown bearers there’s an argument to be made that Narinder has committed the least atrocities. His ass is the only one who hasn’t done a war crime in facilitating a genocide against the lambs. We are never given in cannon what he did to get banished or how the betrayal went so I can only theorize on the severity of his past actions. The conclusion I have come to based on mostly his, ??? (Mystic seller or whatever you call it, to me it’s Kevin) and Shamura’s dialogue is that he did something to attempt to reverse the natural order of things, mostly like relating to death.

I’m gonna ramble cause I’ve been chewing at the bit waiting to be asked about my au. There’s also some art under the cut. Hehe hoho I’ll be so normal with my interests.

Going into my au, that I really really need to name, The Lamb executes Narinder after he’s defeated. Partly for revenge, for their dead family and for damning them to serve the crown, but at the same time they feel empathy for him, as a servant of death they know that to die is to rest. What The Lamb did not forsee was that killing Narinder would damn him to purgatory just as it did his siblings.

I have a early concepts of, who I’ve affectionately dubbed Not-Narinder, with Purged Narinder.

I don’t wanna divulge too many details on my plans for the au, but Narinder does eventually end up in the cult. After two thousand years in service of the crown, another thousand years in chains, and then a hundred years in purgatory stripped of his senses. To some level the cult grounds are its own prison but does he not deserve a chance to carve out his own life? I will however tease a half written script and doodle of The Lamb and Narinder’s conversation after he’s freed of purgatory.

Unfortunately for me my thoughts and plans for the au go back thousands of years before the plot of the game and then another few thousand years after. It’s like the Star Wars timeline, as in its a big mess.

[troius]

I just want to say a few things before you get to the end. First up, it's been a pleasure to read your thoughts on the series; like any fan, you have your own unique interpretations and it's always good to read how fans see certain scenes. It's also been fantastic to see fellow fans respond to your posts adding on to what you've written, again bringing your thoughts out more and generating discussion.

Also, seeing your thoughts has made me appreciate scenes and characters I never thought I would -- Yamamoto for instance, who would've thought?! They've also reminded me of why I fell in love with the series as much as I did, from the artwork to the themes to the incredible bonds between the characters. You've reminded me that BLEACH has it's flaws that can sometimes take you out of the story, but when it hits, it 100% HITS! It's a manga that's about the bonds we form, how they can help us overcome challenges and be a source of light in our lives. It's about the ways we overcome grief and the fear of death, whether it's literally fighting your way through it or slowly coming to a state of acceptance as time goes on. It's about the 'hearts' of people, about what they look like and how they're shared between those you choose. I could go on and on, but then this would become an essay and we'd be here all day.

All of this is to say, thank you for choosing to create a Tumblr account and deciding to read the series and give your thoughts along the way. I can't believe you've finally reached the end, it almost feels like I'm saying goodbye to the manga again!! I don't think I'm the only one here who sees you as a big and valued part of the community on here, so I hope you'll be sticking around! :)

Thank you so much Rays! Response under the cut because it went long.

This won't surprise you, but I too have grown in my appreciation for the series over the course of the uh three years that I've run this blog. Bleach has character concepts I've never seen elsewhere. It has moments of storytelling brilliance. It has truly, phenomenally astonishing art.

But more than anything else, I, like you, am impressed by the heart. For a story that's largely about the afterlife, Bleach is shockingly humanistic, locating virtue not in any system of belief, in any group or faction in the various conflicts that provide the setting for the manga, but in people. All people, whether they're our extremely relatable teenage protagonist and his friends, the occasionally sketchy adults in his life, or the various adversaries ranging from evil monsters to supernatural samurai to a regular-ass gang to a foreign apocalypse cult. Bleach never, not once, lets the viewer fall into the comfortable childish space of believing that there's good people and bad people in the world.

There's just people. Sometimes these people want to do bad things, like execute their sisters, or kidnap your girlfriend, or isolate you from your family, or destroy the entire world. Bleach doesn't flinch away from that either. But it (again, very humanistically) locates those bad actions not in the individual human beings, but in our relationships with one another through the systems and structures we've created to organize ourselves.

And yet in the face of the idea that humans do their worst work through other people, that's also where Bleach locates its greatest virtue. Alone, we're nothing. It's the bonds that we have with others that are what make life worth living, that are the source of everything good in this world. And navigating that dynamic, between spiritual bonds and structural shackles...that's really what adult life is all about, isn't it?

Anyhow, my adult life has been greatly enriched by all of you on here. But I'll take the chance to thank you specifically Rays, for being such a source of joy. Your positivity and passion are the sort of thing that makes a humble blogger want to come back for more, and I've deeply enjoyed hearing all of your thoughts, not just on my liveblog, but through your own posts and writing. I'll be sticking around for sure.

[phantomvegetable]

♡ Hello there ♡

Coming in to politely ask if you'd be happy doing a request for Legion (of the Frank variant please). 100% fine with creative liberties, but I'd adore a story following along the lines of the reader being an old flame before he ended up in the fog, and he is delighting in being a general nuisance for old times sakes. Why be nice and romantic when you can be a pain ♡

ALSO! All the best to you, your writing is really cool from what I've read, and I'm hyped you opened up requests ♡♡♡

h-HI *VIBRATING UNCONTROLLABLY* KSKSKSKDJ

YES ABSOLUTELY <33333 i love the dynamic, hehehehehheehhe

THANK YOU SO MUCH btw ;;A;; it makes my day / makes me want to write more when I hear things like this !! I really appreciate it <3

Legion (Frank) x Reader

ghosts of the future notes: soulmate au, legion members are 18+ at time of disappearance and during reader’s interactions w/ them before the fog tw’s: frank is an ass, strong language, canon typical violence & maybe some torture ?

What would it take to find out what happened to Frank Morrison?

That would be your question for the next two years after his disappearance along with his friends (if you could even call them that—they mostly just followed him around like deranged cult members… but, then again, they were your friends, too). The fucker left you with far too many questions, an unforgiving anger, and the tragic mark of a soulmate.

Yes, Frank was your soulmate—it was proven by the unsuspecting fingerprints wrapped around your wrist in an attempt to grab you during one of your more violent moments of roughhousing. It left Frank speechless, for once; meanwhile, you went berserk. Julie was his girlfriend, not you—you were just some bonus lackey with far too much time on your lonely hands and a concerning obsession with crime.

You avoided him and the Legion for days; only coming into contact with Frank when he approached you one night, alone and seemingly troubled.

“We’re finally doing it,” Frank muttered with his hands in his pockets, masked face turned away from you. “Making a name for ourselves. It’s happening tonight.”

“Good for you,” You barked out bitterly, arms crossed as you stood uneasily in your living room. “I won’t bail you out if you guys get caught.”

“Come with us,” Frank offered after a beat of silence, finally facing you with an outstretched hand. Just looking at it made you shudder—made you want to run and hide. He seemed to sense your discomfort and pocketed his hands instead, straightening himself out before you.

“I—“ You shifted, glancing away warily. “I can’t.” Frank seems to pick up on the double meaning, huffing in irritation.

“Look, Toots. Just because we’re marked or whatever doesn’t mean we haf’ta act like strangers or nothin—“

“I don’t care!” You had snapped, baring your teeth like a caged animal. “Maybe it doesn’t mean that much to you, Frank, but it does to me.” He doesn’t respond. You curl in on yourself even tighter and turn your back to him. “So just—just go.”

You didn’t mean for him to take it literally. He left you alone after that, going so far as to vanish seemingly from existence after the uncovering of a janitor’s dead body just a few days later.

But you wouldn’t let him get away that easily.

The stubborn fire that kept you alive this long coaxed into you following Frank’s trail, leading you down the same path that ended up with blood on your hands. The fog came shortly after. And when it did, you were still the one hunting. Hunting answers, hunting a hunch, hunting feelings that wouldn’t go away.

The trials were easy. You simply had to slash, stab, and destroy through them until the fog returned you to the same decrepit building that quickly became home; and, the place that you continued your search.

“Still obsessing over lover boy, hmm?” A sickly sweet voice purrs from behind, stirring you from your pondering. You barely flinch.

“What do you want, Danny?” You sigh, removing your mask to rub at your face in exhaustion.

“What, I can’t visit my favorite psycho?” He chirps playfully, fiddling with the decaying photo of you and the Legion from where he sits in the dark. You swipe it from his grubby little hands with a look that could kill. “Easy, tiger,” The masked murderer lifts his hands in mock defense. “I was just looking.”

“Yeah, well, could you not?” You groan, hunching over various notes splayed out messily on a desk. “I’m trying to concentrate.” You feel his stare on your back, the sensation louder than the silence that follows.

“You know, I could just show you where he and his puppets hang out.” The way you turn around and stare at Danny is almost comedic.

“What?” You seethe out after a moment, bones popping from how tight you ball your hands into fists. “You mean you knew where he was this whole time and said nothing?” Danny shrugs.

“You never asked.”

The urge to strangle someone was never stronger than in that moment, and you told Danny as much. He just smiles coyly from behind the mask.

When you arrive at Mount Ormond, the numbing cold is a welcomed sensation as freezing winds nip at your skin. Anything to distract you from the nerves that ate at your insides like maggots feasting on a corpse.

The instructions Danny gave you were simple enough, and even though the drawing of the cabin where the Legion supposedly camped out in was utter shit, you found yourself on the doorstep of a to-be reunion with your old mates. It felt way too formal to knock; so you fell into the familiar habit of entering unannounced, climbing through a second-story window that was left unlocked after discovering that the front door wouldn’t budge. Typical.

Tiptoeing through an unwelcoming room consisting of one worn-out couch and a busted TV, the telltale mark of a Legion mask—Susie’s, from the looks of it—resting on a torn cushion has your heart lifting as your fingers stretch to brush against it. They really were here. You swallow thickly.

“Susie?” You find yourself calling out, stepping into the empty corridor. You look left, then right. Nothing. You try a room down the hall, finding no sign of life there either. “Joey? It’s me!”

“They’re not here,” A strikingly haunting voice that makes your breath stutter says coolly from behind, causing the hairs on the back of your neck to stand up straight and chills to prickle all along your arms. Turning to face your ghost, your gaze strikes like iron against Frank’s green one hidden from behind a smiling mask that looks like it’s taken a decent beating over the years. His arms are crossed, and he leans nonchalantly against the wall in an unbothered display. But you knew Frank, and he was pissed. And, quite honestly, so were you.

You find your fists tightening as you stand across from him just like that night, becoming more and more angry. Even more annoyingly, Frank senses this and sighs, unwinding his posture to mimic that of someone trying to calm a wild beast. “Toots—“

That did it.

With a snarl, you spring forward; your fist connecting with Frank’s stupid smiling mask and cracking it nearly in half. He grunts out in shock as he tried to dodge your right hook, hands instinctively catching your wrists just like they did that fateful day and pulling you with him as Frank is sent careening to the floor.

And, just like that, the two of you are whisked into a trial.

You’re still on top of Frank when you spawn outside, wrestling him into the snow.

“What is wrong with you?!” Frank hisses, teeth bared visibly from where you broke his mask.

“What’s wrong with me?!” You laugh cruelly, using your hips to pin him down. “What’s wrong with you?! You fucking disappeared, Frank!” He exerts an impressive amount of strength in order to throw off balance, flipping you over.

“And why would that fucking matter to you?” He retorts. “You’re the one who shut us out!”

“Well excuse me for needing a minute!” You bristle, struggling against his hold. “I had just found out that my soulmate is an asshole who also happens to be insane!”

That strikes something in Frank. He growls audibly as he pulls you up, immediately shoving your face into the snow and making a hasty retreat. You gasp as you stagger to your feet, spitting out melted chunks of ice. You whip around to search for your culprit, eyes narrowing at the sight of Frank running towards the town.

“Coward!” You call after him, giving chase.

You pass multiple survivors that are surely watching on in a stupor as you catch up to Frank, tackling him to the ground again. The two of you grapple until he has you pinned again, this time holding a knife to your throat. Your fury flares.

“Enough!” He commands. “If you want to prove something so badly, why don’t you show me what you can do?” Frank emphasizes his point by pulling his knife away and hurling it at the first unlucky bystander that attempts to flee, sending him to his hands and knees. As the man—Dwight, you bothered to remember—cries out in agony, you glare up at Frank’s slowly-forming smirk, knowing he’s caught your interest.

“Fine,” You relent, and Frank releases you. You stomp to where Dwight grovels, brandishing your own weapon and striking him down without a moment’s hesitation. Jutting your chin over your shoulder at Frank—who fails to hide his smugness—you remove the knife embedded in Dwight’s shoulder and toss it at the brute’s feet, pulling your own accoutrement free. Without waiting, you move on to your next victim, leaving Frank behind to watch you ruthlessly chase them down. He grins, joining you in the hunt.

The two of you manage to bring down five of the eight survivors, wreaking havoc to generators along the way. It becomes a sick sort of game between the two of you to see who can kill the most, and just how diabolically you executed the final blow. Unexpectedly, it does a lot to bring your anger to a simmer; your tensed muscles finally relaxing from their coils as you hack, hack, hacked away.

Another survivor falls to the ground beneath you, dead.

“That’s six,” You announce, Frank just a few feet ahead of you. He laughs—a sound that tickles your brain.

“Keeping count, are we?” He teases. There’s a playful lilt to his voice that you haven’t heard in years—a welcomed gesture.

“Someone has to,” You quip back, and Frank laughs again. You smile.

You step over the carcass and vault the window that was so narrowly missed by the unfortunate woman Frank has trapped underfoot, coming to stand by his side as she squirms and fights to no avail.

“You’re sick!” She gasps, moaning in pain as Frank increases pressure, surely breaking a rib or two.

“That’s no way to talk to the lady,” He jeers, eyes flickering at you. You snort.

“Both of you! You t-two are—ack—psychos!”

You half-expect another witty remark from Frank, half-expect him to snuff her out.

What you don’t expect are his next words.

“Then we must be perfect for each other,” He mumbles, making your ears perk. “We’re soulmates, you know?” Your heart backflips.

“Frank,” You begin to warn him, but he continues.

“Fuckin’ soulmates, you hear?” He suddenly grabs your hand and you go rigid, the contact making your stomach turn. The two of you had been wearing gloves for the entirety of the match, so no marks would be visible—but the touch was enough to make your skin tingle underneath the material. The woman’s brows tighten.

“K-Killers can’t have soulmates,” She wheezes. “You don’t have souls.” Frank’s hand tightens around your own.

“Well it’s a good thing you ain’t God, ain’t it?” He utters snidely before driving his heel down as hard as he can, ending her life. Seven. You let go of Frank’s hand and step back, Frank letting you.

“What the hell, Frank?” You whisper in a shaky breath, clouds of white dispelling the sentiment.

“…I’m sorry,” He tells you finally, turning to face you in shame. His eyes speak of the remorse he feels. “I completely disregarded your feelings when we found out we were marked, and I’m sorry.” Your chest swells in a flurry of emotions.

“But… but you disappeared,” You remind him, unconsciously drawing in on yourself. Frank, ever so cautiously, takes a step towards you.

“It wasn’t my fault,” He speaks calmly, eyes boring into your own. “I was taken by the fog, same as any washed up bastard that ends up here.”

“But—but Julie?” Frank sighs.

“Jules and I… it’s complicated,” He grimaces. “She freaked when she found out I was marked and it wasn’t wit’ her. She doesn’t know it’s you.” Your mouth feels dry.

“But…”

“If I didn’t know any better,” Frank’s voice is low and a husk away, and you didn’t realize just how close he’d gotten. “I’d say you’re fighting for reasons to stay angry at me. Why did you come all the way out here?” Is his disarming question—that, paired with the way his hand brushes cheek when he moves a strand of hair behind your ear—that has you sharply inhaling.

“I—“ You stammer, searching his face. “I was so angry at you,” You begin. “I was so shocked to find out I even had a soulmate, and then you treated it like it wasn’t a big deal—“ Your breath shudders. “I was so mad at you, Frank. To top it off, you up and disappear after telling me you were finally ‘making a name for yourself,’ and a dead body is discovered a few days later? What was I supposed to think, Frank?”

“You could have just let me go,” He mutters, hand lingering on your cheek. You drop your head in resignation, sighing.

“I know,” You grumble. Frank lifts your chin up between his forefinger and thumb as he raises his mask at the same time, finally revealing that same scruffy face you’d grown accustomed to. An oddly soft expression graces his scarred features, and you find yourself unable to speak over the lump in your throat.

“Do you still want to accept me as your soulmate, even with all of…this?” Frank gestures to the empty space where the survivor’s body once was, it having been swallowed up by the entity minutes ago. The chuckle that escapes you surprises even yourself.

“Frank,” You snicker. “I literally just killed people with you. That’s how I ended up here,” You tell him, matching his gaze evenly. He continues to search your eyes for a beat before stepping back.

“In that case…” Frank lowers his mask over his face again, retrieving his knife in one hand while holding the other out to you. “Would you care to finish what we started?”

Whatever anger you held towards Frank in that moment was now gone, seemingly melted away by those eight simple words. You accepted his hand with a small smile; one that said, okay, I’ll trust you. He begins to lead the two of you forward but stops, catching you immensely off guard when he whisks you into his arms, slides his mask up, and plants a massive, wet kiss on your cheek, surely leaving a mark that wouldn’t be so easy to hide without a covering. You let out incoherent noises as Frank slips his mask into place, laughing at your disposition while dodging your sloppy fists.

“Frank, you asshole!” Your words lack any actual bite to them, this serving to make Frank cackle even harder as he once again evades you by taking off with you hot on his heels.

[xxladyballadxx]

Wildness

Richter Belmont x f! reader (smut)

─ ⋆⋅ ♰ ⋅⋆ ─ Dividers by @roseschoices ─ ⋆⋅ ♰ ⋅⋆ ─

(18+)

(Note: This is not my image, just found it on Pinterest so I edited it a little.)

“Richter, oh my god!” Dying in laughter with your stomach twisting. Richter annoyed his little sister Maria by acting very affectionate and flirty towards you. Tera hid her little laugh seeing her own daughter getting irritated by Richter. This led to Maria telling you both to get a room. 

Right after being scooped into his Richter’s room, he picked you up in the air and spun you around. Joyness slipping out through your laughter. He pinned you to his bed and tickled your neck with wet kisses. 

“Oh Richter!” your sweet, loving laughter causing your tummy to go ‘round. “Am I not allowed to shower my precious pretty lady with affection?” Richter asked with a grin, his hands holding down your wrist against the bed.  “Well…” You grabbed his collar flirtatiously and switched places with him, leading him to lying down on the bed instead of you. He gasped, feeling his heart pumping up in excitement, “I want you, Richter Belmont, to show how much you really love me by fucking me right here and right now.” 

That last part you said made his boner raised up. Richter stripped his clothes with a lend of hand from you. You excitedly took all your clothes off and crawled to his bulge, putting your mouth onto his juicy hard dick. Sucking it good and deep. 

“Ah fuck..” Richter groaned, grasping your hair as he watched you with such lust, his wild-beasty eyes flourishing. His cock was tasty as fuck, wet as hell.

Oh how you just fucking love the taste of it.

“(Y/n)...ah..” Richter growled, his lustful eyes preying on you, “I want you fucking inside of me now..” This was a demand for you to start bouncing on top of him and his juicy ass cock. You pulled away from sucking his sweet stick to having your wet pussy being pleasured by his cock. You let out a lot of moans from your lips as you began to bounce on Richter, his cock twisting your insides. Your whole body melted sensually into his pleasure, you moaned loud causing him to give you a good smack on the ass. His eyes are feasting on your breasts that are bouncing madly. 

Oh sweet heavens, it felt like a fucking, bloody paradise to you and Richter. 

Richter wanted to switch places so you laid your back down towards the bed as he crawled on you to kiss you passionately on the lips before putting his dick into your cult. You held his head tight, deepening the kiss and moaning through it. 

He crawled back a bit to insert his dick into your womanhood. As he slowly shoved it in, your whole sweating body trembled into his touch. “Ah, Richter! Mmm..” you yelped feverishly, feeling your insides being completely destroyed with such aggression by Richter’s almighty juicy cock. Your entire mind went to a total blur, lost as if you were in heaven being fucked by a Belmont. “Fuck, (Y/n), you feel so bloody good..” Richter grunted, his cock pushing deeper into your vagina. 

Your moans had gotten louder across the room, a wave of excitement flooding in. Richter loved how you make such heavenly sounds, they were music to his ears. You begged him to go rough on you and so he did, with very deep thrusts. Fucking you straight to heaven and calling you a naughty kitten for being such a little minx towards him. An exciting moan slipped from your lips when he called you a very bad girl. 

“You’re a bad girl, (Y/n). You’re a fucking tease, you know that?” Richter gave a good hard smack towards your ass as he thrusted in a fast motion, causing you to grasp the bed sheets with a gasp. 

Your body felt a warm liquid coming out slowly from your cult, “Richter! I’m about to cum!” you told him with that moany tone of yours. “Come on, baby! Fucking cum in front of me!” Richter went very fast with the thrusts, he slowed it down afterwards when you cummed, squirming out a nice splash of warm milk. Richter laid down next to you, the two of you took a breather after the lovemaking. He held you into his strong arms, kissing your face lovingly, “Fucking hell, I love you so much, (Y/n). You make me the happiest man alive on Earth.” 

You kissed him back, cupping his face, “I love you too, you goofball. We could go for another round..” You smirked mischievously. “After we clean ourselves up of course..” you saying that to your loverboy caused his heart to beat excitedly. 

‘Fuck, this lady drives me wild but I fucking love her for it!’ Richter spoke through his mind, talking to himself. He dragged her closer and kissed her wildly.

Oh boy, this is going to be a long ass fun night for you and your goofy loverboy…

⋆⁺｡˚⋆˙‧₊☾ ◯ ☽₊‧˙⋆˚｡⁺⋆

a/n - My, my...I never knew I would write another Richter Belmont smut which I'm still terrible writing at. I wasn't planning to write this, this idea of mine just popped out of the blue. Well, I hope you thirsty ass hoes enjoyed this ¬‿¬

UNTIL NEXT TIME 𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔

⋆⁺｡˚⋆˙‧₊☾ ◯ ☽₊‧˙⋆˚｡⁺⋆

[therantsofawriterrr]

The Umbrella Academy Final Season: My Version

Part Ten: The Box And The Plan

Overview: In the aftermath of the New Grumpson incident, the gang makes up a plan that tackles all their problems at once. Luther confronts Allison about Sloane and Lila reveals her secrets to Diego. TW: mature language, long ass chapter, FLUFF ALERT CAUSE ITS SO GOOD YALL, uhh tell me if i missed anything!! Pairings: Diego × Lila, a little bit of Five × OC A/N: hello, this one took some time to post sorry. i hope yall enjoy reading!!!

Masterlist

"Who were those weirdos with the fanny packs?" Viktor asked, as Luther looked at the road for a car that could give them a ride and the others just stood around.

"Was it me or did they smell like wet sheep?" Lila asked.

"Goats, I thought," Luther pointed out. "Maybe llamas."

"Who cares? They destroyed Wanda," Diego snapped, pointing at the van.

"Their names are Gene and Jean," Five explained. "They run an underground organization called the Keepers.

"Sex cult?" Diego inquired.

"Not a sex cult. Not even a cult if you think about it, but it's going towards it," Clementine said, from inside the trunk, where she was wiping the blood off her face.

"Eh, once you get to the top, it's always a sex cult," Diego persuaded.

"They're an extremist group who believe they have memories from an alternate timeline," Five stated.

"Yeah, and some of their memories are pretty much bang on," Lila affirmed.

"They're calling this phenomenon the 'Umbrella Effect'."

Clementine finally came out from behind, now wearing a black tank top tucked into her maroon trousers, her hair tied up into a tight ponytail. Five's gaze lingered on her a bit before Viktor's question.

"How is that even possible?"

"Yeah, we're working on figuring that out," Lila replied.

"What do they want with Jennifer?" Ben asked.

"Don't know. But, I'm gonna make some calls, find out how or if she's related to the Keepers," Clementine assured, making Ben sigh in exasperation as she whipped out her phone.

"Yes, yeah, I'm fine, Ray," Allison murmured into her phone. "Mhm, I'll call you."

Luther stared at her with mounting anger, still trying to press it inside as he turned away.

"You alright?" Allison asked with concern, when she saw him.

"I'm fine, no thanks to you," he said, talking to her for the first time in six years.

"Okay, I'm so confused," she pointed out. "Why are you, of all people, mad at me?"

"Why am I mad at you?" Luther finally snapped. "You think I don't know what you did, Allison?"

"Okay, look, I know that I went kind of cuckoo in that timeline, but I-"

"I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about what you did during the time reset."

"The time reset? You mean, bringing the love of my life and my daughter back?"

"No. No. Not that. I was happy you had a chance to do that. I'm talking about Sloane."

"Sloane? What about Sloane?

"You tried to make her disappear during the time reset, Allison! Stop playing dumb with me! And just so you know, it didn't work either."

Allison scoffed, her hand going to her forehead. "Oh, my god. That's what this has been about? You think I made Sloane disappear? Wow."

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Luther asked, confusion warring with fury.

"Luther. I was happy you found Sloane, alright. After what happened with... well, y'know, you deserved it. The only thing I had in mind when I put my hand on that machine was Ray and Claire. I didn't need anything else."

Luther opened his mouth to throw out another retort but closed it. "Wait. So... you didn't make Sloane disappear?"

"Yes, Luther!" Allison exclaimed, tears welling in her eyes. "Look I... I made some mistakes back in there, alright? A lot of mistakes," she started turning to look at everyone as her voice cracked. "And even though every cell in my brain is telling me that it was justified, I know it wasn't. And I know I fucked up. So, I'm sorry. I don't know if you guys will forgive me or not, but still."

She sniffled at the end of it, tears already starting to stream down her cheeks. She wiped them away as she breathed out deeply and slowly, feeling lighter than ever as Klaus smiled at her proudly. He hugged her, leaving Luther to just splutter as he roved his fingers through his hair.

"Okay, well. I've made my calls, we'll be finding something out by evening."

"Evening? Yeah, that won't do. We need to find her. Who knows what those cult leaders will do to her?" Ben asked, the panic in him rising.

"Well, we're not going anywhere in this piece of shit," Five started.

A few hours later, Diego was knocking on Luther's motel room door. Luther opened up in a t-shirt that had a teddy bear on the front and Diego smiled.

"Looking good, big guy," he teased, making him laugh. "By the way, about earlier... Did you like, find Sloane, or something?"

Luther grinned with a nod. The previous weekend, he'd met the Sparrows. And he'd actually gotten along with them. And when he'd seen Sloane, he'd almost hugged her, but he'd curbed his reflexes and resorted to talking instead. It had been lovely altogether.

"And it's not just her either, the whole Sparrow Academy's alive. Except they're a lot... kinder."

"Really? All of 'em? Even the cube?"

"Yeah. He's human here, though."

"Oh. Damn. I guess Ben will be happy to hear that," Diego murmured. "So how'd it go? Was Sloane still the same or...?"

"Yup, she's pretty much still the same. She's a lot bolder here, but, y'know. Love that."

Diego chuckled and patted his shoulder. "Happy for you, man. Really happy for you."

When he went back to his room however, he found Lila pacing back and forth nervously.

"You alright?" He asked her.

She stopped and looked at him with wide eyes, looking like a deer in headlights. She shook her head no once, but the blurted out, "Don't you have questions?"

"About what?" He asked, sitting down on the bed.

"Well, they called me by another name," Lila said, sounding panicked. "You have to have questions about that."

"Well, yeah. I have questions about a lot of things, but, y'know," he shrugged. "I want you to tell me yourself."

"Fine. Fine. Alright," she said, sitting down beside him with her hands clasped on her lap nervously. But, Diego's unexpected patience calmed her and surprised her at the same time. "There is no... book club. I've been going undercover as Nancy to investigate the Keepers."

"So you're working with the CIA?" Diego asked.

"No, no, nothing like that," she said, batting a dismissive hand. "Just my own thing."

Diego pressed his lips together to suppress a smile, just looking at her with eyes filled with glee. Lila's face, in turn, twisted into one filled with absolute bewilderment.

"Wait. No fucking way. You knew?" She asked, her voice getting louder with each sentence.

Diego just gave her a small, casual smile paired with a small shrug as she stared at him, flabbergasted.

"How, though? I'm an excellent liar."

"Yeah, well, I know you. I had to follow you to see what you actually were doing, but, yeah."

"What did you think I was doing?" Lila asked, her body tensing up as she expected the obvious answer.

Diego shrugged once again. "I don't know. I thought you were going to like, a gun range or something."

Lila stared at him for a minute and asked, "You didn't think I was having an affair?"

Diego snorted. "What, like any of the guys in this world would be able to impress you? Pfft."

Lila's eyes started welling up with tears as she sniffled once. Diego laid a hand on her back, his thumb stroking the small of her back soothingly.

"I really thought I'd have to explain that there is no other man."

"I trust you, Lila. There's seven people I trust the most in this world. And you're the first one on that list."

She threw herself onto him, making him fall back on the bed. His arm went around her waist, the other going up to cup the back of her head.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"Being patient. I know I was being a little bit of an idiot."

"Next time, just talk to me."

"I will. I promise."

Meanwhile, Five was on his phone in his room, telling Derek the details of the car that had rammed them earlier.

"I need a run on a Chrysler LeBaron Town & Country, '80, '81. Brown simulated woodgrain sides, New Mexico plates. Look for matches with an owner first name Gene. That is Golf-Echo- November-Echo. Or Jean. That's Juliet-Echo-Alpha-November."

When he cut the call, Clementine who was straight out of the shower, asked, "What if they used a fake name?"

He sighed deeply, looking at her warily. "Then we'll figure it out."

She nodded, flopping down on the bed. "Sorry you gotta stay here with me."

He shrugged, leaning back to support his back on the wall. "It's fine. Not your fault. Plus, I'd rather have you than Luther or Klaus."

"You could've chosen Viktor, though."

"Yeah, I know. But, eh. I wanted to talk to you."

"About what?"

"Why'd you go back to the Thibedeaus' house?"

"Oh, that. Y'know, our things started after we went there. At first I thought it was just fever week, but I was wrong. So, I went back and found those jars. They're what broke that day you took us there."

"Why didn't you tell me you remembered everything?" He asked next. His voice was a bit soft and almost sad too.

She shrugged, leaning back beside Five their shoulders touching. "I don't know. I didn't even expect you to recognize me, to be honest."

"I don't forget pretty faces that quickly."

Clementine's breath hitched at his casual comment as she snapped her head to look at him.

Before she could ask him about it, there was a knock on the door.

"Luther's called a meeting," Klaus's drawling voice said.

They all huddled up in Luther's room, looking at him expectantly.

"Okay, so, all those people back in New Grumpson. They were wearing Hargreeves-branded military gear."

"Luther, the entire goddamn place was a Hargreeves town," Viktor pointed out.

"Yeah, it's like it was designed to keep Jennifer hostage," Ben said worriedly.

"What's so important about her anyway?" Lila asked.

"Isn't it obvious?" Klaus asked. "She's one of us! Yay!"

"No," Ben replied immediately. "No way."

"I mean, that would make sense," Five agreed. "Why else would Dad build a Truman Show around her?"

"Okay, look," Viktor interrupted. "Now that we're on our own, we have two options. We either go after the Keepers or, worse, talk to Dad."

Everyone groaned while some let out sarcastic chuckles at the second option.

"I think we need to split up," Five suggested. "Me and Clementine will follow up with the Keepers. The rest of you talk to Dad."

"Wait, what?" Lila interjected. "I'm coming with you. Oh, and Diego will tag along."

Five made a dirty face as Clementine smiled at them both. "Why? We both will be fine," he said wearily.

"This is as much my investigation as it is yours," Lila replied plainly.

"Plus, the more brains that are involved, the faster this thing will be solved," Clementine said plainly.

"Well, I'm going after Jennifer," Ben declared.

"It's better if we stick together," Allison murmured, partaking in the conversation for the first time since she'd arrived.

"Yeah, well, someone's gotta go after her while you guys spend more time finding things. Who knows where those weirdoes took her?"

"You're pretty worried about this girl," Diego observed. "You know her or something?"

"Ooh, he told me he saw her in his dreams or something," Klaus replied.

"You're all a bunch of clowns," Ben said, trying to divert their attention. "I'm going on my own."

"Oh, right, I wanted to show you guys something," Klaus said, before turning and picking up the box that he'd picked up in the diner. "I found this in there."

They stared at the box for a few seconds before Clementine swished out a pen knife, cutting the tape that was sticking to every side of the lid.

As soon as the lid was removed, there was a mask staring at them.

"Isn't that...?" Five trailed off as Clementine nodded and said, "Cha-Cha's mask. Or Hazel's, I'm not sure."

Klaus took out a newspaper clipping with the Umbrella Academy standing in front of the Eiffel Tower. The headline read: Umbrella Academy Saves Eiffel Tower, Receives Key to City of Paris.

"When the hell did we save the Eiffel Tower?" Klaus murmured in confusion. He peered into the box, shoving the comics aside as he rooted into the box till he felt something cold and metal. He fished it out to find his and Dave's dog tag necklace that he'd lost due to the time reset. He smiled softly, a few memories flashing in his head as he smoothed his thumb over the engorged letters and numbers before putting it on, letting the metal touch his chest comfortingly.

The others fished out various things as well, some familiar, some not, but Clementine's gasp made them jump.

"Oh, sweet mercy of God," she gasped, taking out a gun that was plated with what looked like bronze. "I thought I'd lost her forever."

"Hmm. Nice," Five mumbled absentmindedly.

"Nice? This is amazing! This was a gift I'd bought with my own money for my birthday, man. Do you know how rare custom Mark 23s are?"

Five sighed with a slight shake of his head, a side of his lips tipping upwards even as he tried to resist a smile.

"Huh. So, artifacts from other timelines are showing up, then," Diego said, reading through the article that Klaus had fished out.

"Alright, well, now that that's confirmed, it's settled," Five said, keeping away the comics in his hand. "Clementine, Lila, Diego, and I will go the Keepers route. Luther, Allison, and Viktor, you guys go talk to Dad. Ben and Klaus, go after Jennifer."

"Dream team," Klaus said with a bright smile as Ben scoffed, but didn't really argue. Klaus was the most bearable of the lot.

That night, they slept somewhat peacefully, content with the plan that was made.

Another A/N: Thanks for reading!!

TUA taglist: @auxiliarydetective (tell me in the comments if you wanna be added!)

Likes, reblogs and comments are highly appreciated💖💙💜

[spop-romanticizes-abuse]

tumblr was being buggy today and this ask got deleted but i do have screencap of it, so i'm gonna answer it here.

hi! first off, thank you and i appreciate you being so civil about this.

i understand what you mean. i wasn't raised in a religious cult so i may not know the nuances of that experience but my problem does not lie solely with catra's toxic behaviour in s1-4. what i dislike is her redemption arc.

if you've read some of my previous posts, you might know that i was never against catra having a redemption arc. i don't think she's irredeemable. i do sympathize with her and i think it would be a powerful message if she really was able to become a kind and compassionate person, after all the hurt that she went through.

i just have a problem with how rushed and frankly unrealistic her redemption was. i wanted to see a drawn out redemption arc where catra makes amends for everything she has done, and earn the trust and forgiveness of the other characters. but instead of doing that, the creators decided that it was easier to have the other characters forgive her unprompted and to have catra act basically the same as she always did.

also, while catra was raised in a cult-like environment, what i find interesting is that the horde has almost no effect on her. catra was definitely very traumatized by shadow weaver's abuse, but there was nothing even close to religious trauma.

she knew from the beginning that the horde was evil, she wasn't taken in by the lies like adora was. i feel like the religious trauma reference falls apart there because catra was working for the horde in her own interest, not because she was forced or manipulated into doing so.

i have mentioned shadow weaver in my blog as well, i just don't go into detail about her abuse because i think the show was pretty straightforward and countless other people have done deep dives on it. shadow weaver was meant to be an unlikeable character anyway, we weren't supposed to sympathize with her or relate to her.

you said that catra was trying so hard to redeem herself. i would like to hear a clarification on that because as far as i can see, she wasn't trying at all. she went back to lashing out at adora, calling her names and guilt tripping her as soon as she was rescued from horde prime. not even a thank you. she doesn't address angella's death at all and glimmer seems to have completely forgotten about it. she still makes unsavory jokes about the princesses after she spend four seasons colonizing and destroying their kingdoms. her apology to entrapta and scorpia was half-assed, to say the least.

catra wasn't trying hard. the other characters just magically forgave her for all her war crimes because that's what the writers wanted. and she definitely did not deserve to get into a relationship with the person who she had been relentlessly abusing, both physically and emotionally, and trying to murder.

i get that a lot of people relate to catra and i'm not saying that anyone who relates to her is automatically toxic. even i relate to certain parts of her. but that doesn't mean she's a good character.

you said it takes time to unlearn toxic behaviours and i completely agree. (also i wouldn't consider 21 “a kid”. she's young, sure, but she's still an adult.) but if the writers cared about that, they would have redeemed catra earlier. they had five seasons to work with, most shows don't get that liberty. avatar the last airbender gave zuko an incredible redemption arc in just three seasons, the owl house wrote a believable redemption for hunter and amity in just one season each, infinity train wrote a good redemption arc for grace in only ten episodes! you can't use the “there was no time” excuse.

you have to keep in mind that a lot of people who hate catra and her arc are also people who relate to her. a lot of my mutuals relate to catra and her struggles, and that's exactly why they hoped for a better redemption arc. they wanted to see her work on her mistakes, face the consequences of her actions and change realistically. they didn't want to see her just get forgiven out of the blue. imagine if that's how we treated war criminals in real life.

if i was like catra and i heavily related to her, i wouldn't want to see her never face the consequences of her actions and be coddled. i wouldn't want that for myself either. if i made some serious mistakes (especially to the extent that catra had), i would be prepared to face the consequences of my actions and i wouldn't expect anyone to forgive me.

anyway, sorry about the long post but i hope this gives you an idea of why i have a problem with catra and spop as a whole.

[thetardisisnotourdivision]

Been playing Cult of the Lamb for a while. Named it "Maths Is Bad" (my dad handed me the controller after I came out of paper 1 GCSE maths sobbing). My cult was a peaceful place. No sacrifice. No hurt. No illness. No starvation. No dissenters. Just peace and victory over the old gods (who are fucking WACK, btw. Why are they the four horsemen of the apocalypse. Why is my cult the only normal place in this world. I love this game.)

And then the "sins of the flesh" update came out.

Choice between a "lust" ritual and a "wrath" ritual.

My asexual ass immediately chooses Wrath.

"can't be that bad"

Oh good lord what have I done.

Chaos. Tried the ritual. Was terrified. Everyone went NUTS. Started destroying my cult.

SOME FUCKER MURDERS MY SPOUSE IN A FIGHT.

I sacrificed the fucker. I've never done a sacrifice before and it was fucking terrifying but Tyty (small cat-shaped demon thing) deserved it. Sick fuck.

Next doctrine, I'm like "ok just nothing bad. Nothing quite as terrifying as that. Please".

My gay ass picks "pride".

First ritual goes ok.

I need to generate more sin so that I can hatch more followers - first one (I named them Derry after Derry Girls) was super cute and also I have very few followers. And I'm not risking Wrath again.

I try the Pride ritual.

I pick a random guy to pin all the pride to, figuring he'll just barf it all up like the first guy did.

Dude barfs three times.

I'm getting concerned by this point.

DUDE GOES TO ACTUAL MOTHERFUCKING HELL BECAUSE HE HAS TOO MUCH PRIDE

THIS BITCH SWEARS REVENGE

I'M TOO TERRIFIED TO REALISE WHAT'S GOING ON

Shaken, I start a new crusade.

Going well. Calming down.

WHO FUCKING POPS UP.

"THIS PAIN... IT IS UNBEARABLE... IT IS YOUR FAULT!"

THE SPIRIT OF JOHANN TETZEL'S 1517 SERMON COMES BACK TO HAUNT ME

SHAKING

WTF IS THIS BITCH DOING

I SWEAR I DIDN'T FUCKING KNOW

I DIDN'T MEAN TO HURT YOU DUDE I SWEAR

TRY TO FIGHT HIM

DEFEAT HIM (half a heart left)

Shaking but I think he's gone now.

A few days go by.

Trade with the neighbours.

Next crusade. Oh jesus.

The horror that runs through me. The absolute terror that fills me as tHIS FUCKER TURNS UP AGAIN

At this point I'm wondering whether I can like. Exorcise his soul or sm just to keep him away from me.

IT HAPPENS AGAIN

AND AGAIN

AND AGAIN

MY BROTHER IN LAMB I'M SORRY

PLEASE FUCKING STOP

I DIDN'T MEAN TO IT'S BEEN WEEKS JESUS

LET IT GO MAN

LET IT GO

IT'S BEEN LITERAL WEEKS EVERYONE WHO KNEW YOU HAS DIED OF OLD AGE JUST PLEASE, PLEASE

PLEASE

[thelocalconstellation]

In case anybody was wondering what my current thoughts are for the whole story behind the 100 days multiverse bit, here they are! Some stuff I'm hedging my bets on still but I've not solidly noted it down if there isn't at least a handful of reason as to why. Some of this is also information I got from the lore document pinned in the discord. I haven't quite been able to finish as much as I wanted. Lore doc stuff will have an asterisk next to it

Things I'm pretty damn certain on

- The Alterans were an initial larger group, which Decem and co split off from.

- Decem is both an individual and a group*

- The Alterans did in fact remove Legundo's memories. It feels pretty explicitly mentioned but I haven't gotten there yet.

- Legundo was a member of Decem, the evidence provided by the lore doc seems pretty explicit on this one*

- Legundo was initially yeeted into the unknown by The Alterans.*

- There's some kind of requisite for either Decem to give up or for Legundo to go back or something. I'll elaborate on this later.

- It's some kind of fight over control of the multiverse, or Decem is planning to destroy and then reform it how they wish. The chess references* incline it towards a fight for control but I haven't seen much or I don't quite recall enough on it to say so much about The Alterans.

- Legundo is Literally just Doing His Best out here guys. He doesn't know what exactly is happening or why, just roughly who's involved and that they won't leave him alone. Also I think he needs a friend :(

- Legundo is some form of irreplaceable to Decem and thus has value to The Alterans

- Decem's power is split between the 10 members, in which I have SO many questions about.

Things I SWEAR have meaning and by god I will find it.

- The Deal. Again, I'll elaborate later.

- Each of the titles for the members of Decem. (I do not remember them all off the top of my head but theres supposed to be 10.)

- what on this unholy green earth is The Nexus. I'm assuming some kind of gateway, but I cannot tell.

- Disagreements between members of Decem and co.*

- Decem wants Legundo alive, despite having taken more violent action in the past. I have questions. (This does mean that any prerequisite has nothing or little to do with Legundo's continued survival)

- The obelisks. I keep seeing people have theories on what they do/what they're for and oh my god WHY are they THERE

- Darkness. Why.

- The cult from the darkness world. There's implications to this and I sit here and scream.

Best guess I've got for now

Legundo was taken from Decem as The Architect, had his memories erased by The Alterans and launched into some corner of the multiverse to try and delay his return to Decem or whatever.

Decem is some kind of malicious or lightly malicious entity. I haven't quite figured out if Decem, The Guy, is a god or other kind of deity or if they're just really good at being a cult leader.

The Alterans managed to contain or imprison Decem members at some point. If this is before or after nabbing Legundo, I haven't quite figured it out yet.

The obelisks are the things chucking Legundo between universes like a hacky sack. Desert episode guys, come on.

Which means there has to be a reason why Decem is chucking Legundo around the mutliverse like a hacky sack, which is suggested to be to bring Legundo closer to Decem so they can either use him to break out or grab his goofy ass and kidnap him back to wherever they camp out. The Alterans either don't, can't, or won't do anything about this until they get a little too close at which point they give him an option out.

Legundo knows something about Decem and the fact that he was part of their group at one point. I don't remember the exact wording so this one is on thin ice but I swear something about not going back was said before he went through the ancient city portal. I think there's time passed between each world and I haven't actually seen anything about this so far, it could be in another series and I just don't know because I fell down this rabbit hole like. Two-three weeks ago.

The Alterans aren't great either. Magic, I imagine, likely leaves a kind of almost residue? Some kind of Vibe, especially large scale magic. His hesitance towards going through the portal at the end of the darkness world is interesting. Either way this feels like a kid whose parents are in the middle of a very, very messy divorce.

Elaboration hour

The FUCKIN deal. WHAT deal mr legundo sir. WHAT. I have a very clear clip in my brain of him saying "We had a deal!" At the end of the 'new mod a day' world. There's some kind of agreement that Decem goes along with to an extent for some reason. If it's an attempt at compliance then it doesn't explain the fear and hesitance about the obelisks showing up still. Legundo isn't naive. By this point you'd think he'd be used to it if the deal was anything about transporting him across the multiverse, much less a timer on how long he gets to stay.

Actually, thinking about it a little harder now, I reckon it's a chance. I think it has something to do with Legundo gets 100 days to try and hide or do something and if he can successfully evade Decem for however long and/or complete,,, something (at which point I wonder what exactly)? Then he wins. But with Decem being the one choosing where he goes and the situations he ends up in, they know what world he's in. Given that they seem to be observing him somehow, I'd also say that's how they show up the morning of day 100 without fail. Having gone 10 worlds before Decem really caught up to Legundo a little, I have to wonder if there's any pattern or reasoning to each world selected. I'll have to go and look at what each world is and if there's any correlation to Decem characters later. It's likely not very relevant nor important, but it'd be fun to know anyways, even if there is no relation.

The obelisk powers now, I know it includes player transport and revival. I also reckon they have something to do with either tracking or a general conduit for Decem's power(s), as well as acting as some form of communicative link given how Legundo speaks to them like they can hear him. Also the malicious compliance from Decem also encourages this notion.

Anyways yeah I still don't know how or why Decem's power seems split the way it is (something about full power 'when we are whole' from the bit after 11, from who I presume to be The Warrior speaking. The Warrior said a lot of interesting things I went over that on another post.) Or exactly what their goals are. I know that both The Alterans and Decem have interest in Legundo, enough to be fighting over him like a pair of small children. Whether it be from a general investment of power standpoint or there's something seriously up with this guy, I still can't quite tell and unfortunately I do not have the current time to find out right now.

Either way here I am. Full hyperfixation in progress, and I reckon I'll be around for a while.

[egirlgarak]

@annahamiltonsstuff asked a while back if I could post about my little Franz playlist, so here we are! thanks for asking, I had fun streamlining and annotating :3c it’s all under the cut, but you can listen here :]

Burning of the Midnight Lamp - Jimi Hendrix

The morning is dead, and the day is too There's nothing left here to lead me but the velvet moon All my loneliness I have felt today It's a little more than enough to make a man throw himself away And I continue to burn the Midnight Lamp, alone

Jimi song about being a lonely insomniac? yeah, sure. that's for franz.

Asleep in the Deep - Mastodon

The moment you walked in the room my friend The demons, they all went away Be careful they're only asleep for a while Pretending there's nothing to say. Throw salt in all the corners here Make sure you watch him leave

i think several people have come into franz’s life, stayed just long enough to shine their light on him, just long enough for him to wonder what his life could be. gave him just enough of their time for him to envision a man he could and would never be. and in the end, they leave. every time. some by choice (laura, carlo, mikesch- though i think franz was the one to leave mikesch that summer decades ago, too afraid of his own bisexuality), others not (Im Freien Fall, Am Endes des Flurs). so, yes, people come, they help put his fears to rest, and then they leave and franz is alone again with memories of these people he’s loved and the fear that he’s never been enough and he’ll always be alone.

Every Planet We Reach Is Dead - Gorillaz

When we go down For all the sacred selfless days Only left with heartache I want to see you again I love you But what are we going to do?

but the person who’s been by his side the whole time? the one he thought he could trust to the end? he doesn’t even have that. Der Tod ist unser ganzes Leben is such a delicious heartbreak of an episode with how distant Franz and Ivo are from each other. All Franz wants to do is protect Ivo because he trusts him. but then Ivo turns around and lies to his face and Franz, again, is left to wonder what the last twenty years have meant.

Veteran of the Psychic Wars - Blue Öyster Cult

You see me now, a veteran of a thousand psychic wars My energy's spent at last and my armor is destroyed I have used up all my weapons and I'm helpless and bereaved Wounds are all I'm made of

idk man, boy’s got trauma, what else is there to say.

Capsize - The Low Blow

Blood on my hands I'm a lonely man So afraid of the lovers I seek For I'm dancing in a burning field Of these love letters I'll never speak (…) Tears on my cheek don't make me weak Nor does loving the beautiful Cause I'm stronger than hell when I'm looking at you

ok, see. i think franz has hardened as he’s aged, but at his core I do think he’s quite gentle (specifically envisioning crying Franz in Blutiger Asphalt & Frau Bu Lacht) and, really, how else can he cope with the loss he’s experienced in his life than by protecting himself from everything else. so for all the pain and suffering franz has gone through, there is something genuinely beautiful about the love franz and ivo share, and i think a lot of franz’s strength comes from loving and being loved by ivo.

Love Hurts - Incubus

Love hurts But sometimes it's a good hurt And it feels like I'm alive Love sings When it transcends the bad things Have a heart and try me 'Cause without love, I won't survive

see again: the concept of being a broken man coming to terms with loving and being loved, even amidst your mental illnesses

Hurt - Johnny Cash

I hurt myself today To see if I still feel,  (…) Everyone I know Goes away in the end

would love to just copy paste the whole ass song in here. i won’t. but it’s a franz song. [see: die Wahrheit & also every other Franz and the No Good Very Bad day episode]

I Am All I Got - The Dead Brothers

I remember the day When I cried out for help No one came running And that′s when I first knew I am all I got!

two songs that wouldnt apply to franz if he would just either: a) go to therapy b) go to bed c) go let ivo spoon him (ideally all of the above, but i’ll settle for even just one. please franzl. we can’t keep doing this)

Comfortably Numb - Pink Floyd

When I was a child, I caught a fleeting glimpse Out of the corner of my eye I turned to look, but it was gone I cannot put my finger on it now The child is grown, the dream is gone I have become comfortably numb

We all already know that Franz’s massive daddy issues are the root of most of his woes and sorrows, right? His abusive father played a fundamental role in how he learned to navigate the world around him. i think this is less canon and more the effects of @weidli’s word weaving but the concept of franz, as a little boy, doing everything he can to be worthy of his father’s affection, only for the man to turn around with a scowl on his face and a belt in his hands? no child deserves that. no one would come out of that undamaged. then 40 years down the line this same man commits assisted suicide without saying goodbye (Außer Gefecht) and now Franz is left wondering if there was ever any love there.

But it’s okay! Franz has a coping mechanism. It’s called Depression.

[fenriraa]

Astorvember [Cult]

Day 13

Well, I kinda forgot to plan this one out, so I'm just gonna drop some stuff from my AU story/whatever I have about the cult.

I'll say though, I don't think anyone is the leader, just a bunch of seers who want to see the world end and have weekly cult meetings.

I made a character chart:

Yes, they're in order from the cutscene, I had rewatched that fucking scene so many times to connect who's voice was whoever was standing where. And to see where Astor was at. I have heard more things than I needed to. Here's a list if anyone's interested:

"reveal unto us the future" -Erebus

"ooh how divine" -Devola

"yes, lord ganon!" -Lucien

"cast all to darkness" -Haz(a)el

"destruction to Hyrule!" -Caius (also died first)

tried to destroy the Harbinger, Valor

I realize Astor and Valor's names sound kind of similar, but the name Valor seemed kinda fitting for him, so I went with it. Lucien's name meaning gets brought up at some point (it means light, which is very ironic). Hazael sometimes gets called Hazel.

I think the cult itself isn't really new. They knew what they were doing, but I believe they started to rely on the Harbinger a little too much when it comes to seeing the future, because none of them saw that shit happening, and I believe Ganon would hide things from them. But, that aside, they're very into the idea of the world being in ruins. Destruction everywhere. Previous cultists, that are no longer there, left some information, notes, tools, etc, and was passed on to new members.

Some non-seer villagers sometimes go to them for some divination readings (?) without realizing that they worship Ganon. There might be some traditional events in Deya for seers (that have nothing to do with Ganon) that some of them attend.

For this AU I'm working on, they all still live after being maliced. Either they simply survive or Ganon brings them back. I'm still deciding if I should also go with this different-ish storyline where something from the far, far future comes back in this timeline and specifically haunts Astor and tries to attack the Harbinger. But regardless of which one I go with, I'm wanting to make it where they all bring Hyrule to ruins and Astor gets what he wants in the end, taking over Hyrule. Or... I could just make everyone suffer and make Astor have to fight the malice forms of his fellow now-dead cultists Ganon devoured towards the end just after he starts to care about them ^_^

Astor doesn't really care for the others at first, but later on he starts to tolerate them more and more. Still kinda of an ass though.

I would like to dump some of whatever this is here (not in order):

I was very excited when I remembered about the motorcycle chase idea lmao.

I don't know exactly how I ended up doing all this for some nameless characters with copy-paste and bald models that get killed off in a minute or less, but oh well.

[thegeminisage]

tng update time!! we're back, baby. sunday we did "the masterpiece society" and "conundrum" and last night* we did "power play" and "ethics."

*by last night i mean earlier tonight, but i'm typing this at 1am and letting it post tomorrow

the masterpiece society: this one was okay. i was very endeared at first to this guy flirting RESPECFULLY with deanna after the ordeal of 3 rape scenes in one episode but then she shot him down and he kept flirting. WILL my misery never cease

that said, i like that picard was nice to her when she fessed up about fucking with him. i am so fond of saying "treat him really niceys" about data but perhaps we should also be treating DEANNA really niceys. instead of raping her repeatedly.

one hilarious detail i noticed about this episode was that they went out of their way to show us a lot of extras in this episode (sometimes we don't even get this many extras in ten forward scenes) and show us that the extras were. diverse. because if the society is "genetically engineered to perfection." and then you only show white people. THAT puts a whole new spin on things. i'm imagining some joker on the production team looking at a shot of mostly-white extras and frantically calling the casting director on the phone

i was EXTREMELY worried when they asked geordi to work with this woman but he was professional the whole time to my huge relief. actually, geordi had a little bit going on in this ep that i really enjoyed - when these "perfect" people kept implying he would have been aborted as a fetus in their society he gave as good as he got EVERY time and his blind ass DID in fact wind up saving all their lives and GOOD FOR HIM!

i dont really get what the big deal is about 23 people leaving = destroying their society. if you can't plann for people being out then it's your managerial skills that need work. also, they were kinda freaks, so maybe they needed to have their little cult broken up. sorry

conundrum: EPISODES FOR MEEEEE. this episode was just like tabula rasa, except this predates tabula rasa, so really tabula rasa is just like IT. anyway, amnesia. i was gleefully rubbing my hands together the entire time

hands down funniest bit was everyone just assuming worf is captain despite the fact that he's bloodthirsty and insane but the second funniest bit was data the bartender. "where's the android?" "serving drinks in ten forward." "[as data speed types] you must have been one hell of a bartender." 10/10 no notes

also his little chess game with deanna!! wah.

actually no the other funny bit was riker lowkey running around on deanna with ro. and i abslutely LOOOVED he and deanna being flirty with each other. it's ABOUT TIME we got some real food. it's been so sexless up til now that all she did was play with his hair a little and we both went bananas

and then the scene at the END? riker more flustered than we've EVER seen him and these two ladies ganging up on him...mwah. 10/10 perfect.

the villain this episode was good. when he first showed up cathy was like who tf is that and i was like idk some rando im sure he doesnt matter but then the computer named him first officer and it was like !!!!!!!!!!!! they tricked me !!! it's a VERY rare day when tng manages to trick me i was so pleased. i do kinda wish they hadn't theo teennwolfed him though (made everyone else a bit dumber to make him seem smart)

power play: deannna was so hot in this episode she should play male characters more often

i really REALLY wish i had been riker deanna and worf that had been possessed. data's not as much fun when he's someone else and not data. obrien could have come too if he wanted though i guess

PLEASE do not tell rosalind chao to shut her baby up. the last time someone told anyone to shut a baby up in a property she happened to be acting in. well. mash fans know. they know.

i genuinely believed those guys were ghosts until the last second. probably because prisoners makes no sense. also, i think prison for 500 years is too much. can we not just let them die

i love when possessed data tried to prove worf and worf was like lol no. he knows data is 10x stronger than him lmao

i wish guinan had been in this episode it's been ages and i miss her

after how tense and fun the beginning was the end and middle of this episode were kind of anticlimactic. still, it was fun and so it gets a pass. more people should get possessed on the enterprise

WHY DO I ONLY GET 4K CHARACTERS PER TEXT BLOCK staff i'll fucking kill you. anyway

ethics: RIKER/WORF/DEANNA IS REAL IT HAPPENED ON MY COMPUTER SCREEN!

ok, first of all, sorry i have to go ahead and get this out of the way before i get to the good stuff, picard advocating for assisted suicide is NNNOT his best look. in fact it's literally such a fucking bad look. actually. uhh tw for talk of suicide here on down

i understand what they were trying to do. they wanted to present both sides of the ethical dilemma here "equally." but there are some problems with this. firstly, in the real world, assisted suicide is for people with like. terminal illness. worf was fine. yes, he was paralyzed, but he was healthy and had the change to regain a great deal of his mobility. so picard already looks like an asshole because he's advocating for a disabled person killing themselves because they "can't" adjust to the loss.

SECONDLY, the use of "can't" was very poorly done here. if picard had said, worf is too stubborn to change his beliefs, he WON'T adjust to this because he will refuse to try, that would be a LOT BETTER than saying "worf CAN'T adjust to this, it's too many lifelong values to change."

and finally, if we really wanted to be "equal" about the debate, it wouldn't be about worf's ability or inability to adjust to being disabled, it would be about his BELIEFS. like his society and heritage, which he cherishes so deeply because he felt disconnected from it for so much of his life. instead picard was just like "worf is way too much of a pussy to do this just let him die lmao"

like he seriously tried to persuade will to KILL WORF. worse, to help worf kill himself!! JUST BECAUSE WORF WAS DISABLED. he even guilted riker about it: "he wouldn't have asked if he didn't know he could count on you." girl what the FUCK

ok anyway, speaking of will: his reaction here was so strong i wonder if he knew someone who'd killed themselves before. NOT that i'm complaining about a strong reaction. FINALLY we are getting some solid worf/riker Content. maybe asking your commanding officer to kill you is romance or whatever. i loved their argument to little bitty pieces. compare to: riker in tears next to deanna's sickbay bed. ooough i am eating. according to the wiki they actually cut a scene of nose-to-nose yelling and i'm mad about it. LET THEM PUT THEIR FACES TOGETHER. give me something to live for

deanna in this episode too. her kneeling by the fallen worf and murmuring "let me help you." her making him talk to his son. him BASICALLY asking her to be his kid's new adoptive parent should he kick it

oh speaking of alexander. he said some really troubling things this episode. such as, "my mom always said klingons had dumb ideas about honor" and "i don't care about being klingon." HIS MOTHER WAS RACIST..............if alexander decides the klingon ways aren't for him that's fine but that should be a choice HE GETS TO MAKE what an insane way to be raised. meanwhile people are out here calling worf a deadbeat and he put aside his suicide plan for alexander specifically

other shocking things about this episode: beverly was sooooo good actually. she was channeling bones energy in her fury and i mean that as the highest possible compliment. that other doctor quite literally KILLED A PATIENT because she's so sketchy and focused on her own glory "oh i need tokeep a professional detachment" YEAH SO YOU DON'T FEEL GUILTY ABOUT KILLING PEOPLE. bones would have torn her limb for limb and i'm very glad beverly did too. i just don't understand why she was allowed to like leave the ship and go back to practicing medicine. she should have her medical liscene revoked. was this too also in the name of "both sides" of the debate girl this isn't fox news she KILLED A PATIENT for her own personal gain just space her ass!

the fake-out with worf dying was expected but them faking us out for so LONG was a surprise. i was like how are they gonna get him out of this one and it's literally the klingon anatomy. double of eeeeeverrrything. wow that sure is something. funny that worf has ridges on sooo many places. love that it took until season 5 to see it

also, that surgery scene was GROSS. im not normally squeamish but that little worm thingy they put into him looked awful

devastated there was no worf/riker reunuion at the end but other than that and picard and that other dr lady not getting fired it was extremely good. one of my favs so far i think actually.

tonight: "the outcast" and "cause and effect." i've started spoiling myself w/ episode summaries in order not to get surprised by 3 rape scenes in a row again and ik what both of these are about and im soooo excited for it

[chenanigans]

I love how none of my dnd characters are consistent. We got:

Rawhide Kobayashi

Albino Red Grung

Gloomstalker Ranger

A himbit (himbo and Timbit)

He raises cattle that are giant woolly aphids and beetles

He’s a little frog cowboy who went to the tundra to save his papa

An absolute cinnamon roll, but could actually kill you

Maridia Fusilli

Rosy Maple Mothfolk

Aberrant Mind Sorcerer

Feral teen who loves maple syrup

She’s a moth sorcerer who’s hellbent on getting revenge on the demons who burnt down her tree, disabling various members of her family

She’s going to magical girl school

Looks like a cinnamon roll, wishes to bathe in the blood of her enemies

Dalrymple “Dal” Iniqine Cyr

Tiefling Werewolf (aka Shifter)

Samurai Fighter

Himbo energy but a lesbian

Loves women and is very lonely

Bffs with Rawhide

Looks like she can kill you, but is actually a cinnamon roll

Dr. Maiken Cyraeni Grebella

Blue-Ringed Octopus Simic Hybrid

<Armorer> Artificer

Grumpy scientist who’s good at biology and technology

She cares more about inventing than adventuring

Looks like she can kill you, will definitely try to but probably can’t

Mercy Mousse

Myconid

Spores Druid, <Glamour Bard>

Left her home to become a pop star

Is always cheerfully singing and dancing

Her music and back-up dancers are a bit macabre

Looks like a cinnamon roll, is a cinnamon roll

Razmi McDazzl

Changeling

Eloquence Bard

Is apparently a good accountant

She loves money and will do anything for it

She is very charming so it’s hard to see through her lies

Looks like she can kill you, probably won’t but will trick ya

Delphinium “Delphi” Speedwell

Blue-Green Grung

Chronurgy Wizard

Biggest and fattest grung from her town

She’s a gentle “giant“ among her fellow grungs, but won’t hesitate to beat your ass if you threaten her tribe

She went from student to headmaster of her school very quickly and she’s very sad about it

Looks like a cinnamon roll, is a cinnamon roll, but also can kill you

Sorro Levki

Black Tabaxi

Fathomless Warlock

Drowned and came back because of his new patron

Doesn't like to fight but has to fight and make offerings to his patron

Misses going to sea, but is thought to be bad luck/a bad omen due to being the sole survivor of his shipwreck

Looks like a cinnamon roll, is a cinnamon roll

Nithi Blightkiller Kalukukané

Orange Grung

Gloomstalker Ranger, Scout Rogue

Absolute grouch

Doesn’t want to be bothered and just wants to steal and murder in peace

She only targets shitty folk

Looks like she can kill you, can kill you

Cherome “Cherry” Sedum

Cape Rain Frog Aasimar

Wild Magic Sorcerer

A very small and sad girl

She grew up in an abusive cult, but now is with a loving party she considers her family as well as her frog family too now

She’s getting stronger and radicalized to destroy parliament

Looks like a cinnamon roll, is a cinnamon roll, but can also kill you

Celesse Moonstone

Star (aka Fire Genasi)

<Stars> Druid

Came to [insert planet here] because she loved humanity, especially their art

Is a literal ray of sunshine

Looks like a cinnamon roll and is a cinnamon roll

Cheer Sympathy Gritish

Tiefling

Order Cleric, Champion Fighter

Harmacist

She works at Delphi’s school as a guidance counselor and a combat healing teacher

Extremely loud

Looks like she can kill you and can kill you

Dangeline “Danny/Dan“ Wolfsbane

Horned Toad (Zariel Tiefling)

Wild Magic Barbarian

She looks scary and intimidating but she has a big weakness for smaller frogfolk and kids

She cares a lot about getting people out of bad situations

Looks like she can kill you, can kill you, but is also a bit of a cinnamon roll

Lulamin Helianthus

Honeybee Fairy (aka Fairy)

Crown Paladin

Bee who always ends up in a situation

Rode a train and had an awful time, performed in a play and had an OK time, literally trying to get home

Looks like a cinnamon roll, is a cinnamon roll, but can also kill you

Rulaberri Humwallon Dianthus

Carpenter Bee Fairy (aka Fairy)

Devotion Paladin/Wild Paladin (Homebrew)

Sweetie bee who is 99% of the time unaware of who gods are

Got a cushy seat in Oberon’s court as the God of Flowers

Became queen bee under sad circumstances

Looks like a cinnamon roll, is a cinnamon roll, but can also kill you

Mimi the Mimic

Mimic (aka Plasmoid)

Beast Barbarian

Will eat people and animals alike and sees no issue with that

No moral code, sadistic, no empathy

Can be swayed easily with food

Looks like she can kill you, will kill you and then eatcha

Wislande Ritha Fanfan

Entler (aka a homebrew race)

Eldritch Knight Fighter

Pure of heart, dumb of ass

She likes art

She’s from Canada, traveling the USA for art inspiration reasons

Absolutely does not know anything about America and how to traverse it

Looks like a she can kill you, is a cinnamon roll, but can also kill you

Bonnycastle Funfetti

Ex-wedding cake (aka Plasmoid)

Dreams Druid

A literal and figurative sweetie

Became a Dreams Druid to help other’s dreams come true

Looks like a cinnamon roll (cake), is a cinnamon roll (cake)

Wruth Carol Firhug-Hollyleaf

Christmas Elf (aka Rock Gnome)

Swarmkeeper Ranger

An elf who would rather disappear into the woods than work in a toyshop

Eventually became a forest ranger instead of a toymaker

They miss their birth parents dearly, but love their adoptive family a lot too

Looks like a cinnamon roll, is a cinnamon roll, but can also kill you

Claudette “Claude“ Sanon

Ghost Ant (aka Thri-kreen)

Assassin Rogue

Likes sugary/fruity drinks, being a flapper, and being a very good assassin

She ditched her anthill for a more self-indulgent, less community-focused lifestyle

Looks like he can kill you, can kill you

Is the only character of mine to die and is now piloted by my DM as a totally normal not remade by a space lich guy

Merino Mittenmere

Tortoiseshell Tabaxi

Artillerist Artificer

She a granny and loves her kittens and grandkittens

Has committed war crimes

Looks like a cinnamon roll, can also kill you

Manon Pastelle

Fierna Tiefling

Life Cleric

She sounds and looks all doom and gloom but says the nicest, most positive shit

A pastel goth

She is a doctor who cares deeply for her patients

Looks like she can kill you, is a cinnamon roll

[elgaravel]

eheheehh 5, 24, 21, 32 for sylvan, 9, 11, 17, 19 for hakon pleaseys

ik you sent this forever ago but i forgot abt it in my notes on my phone im so sorry 😭😭 thank you beloved

Sylvan:

On an average day, what can be found in your character’s pockets?

Some gold he managed to pickpocket from some rich people, matching bracelet with Valen that he broke and still hasn't fixed (he says he keeps it there as a reminder to do so), and a bunch of pocket sand in his back pocket that he'd probably throw at Andros or smth JFDSKLF. He talks to Julian too much :/

How quick is your character to trust someone else?

An average amount of time? He doesn't have trust issues, really, but he's not giving it out to just anyone. He takes his time getting to know people and seeing if there's any connection before deeming them trustworthy. But he doesn't have to like someone for him to trust them (ex. he doesn't like Kaidan all that much but he trusts him to keep Valen safe).

If something tragic or negative happens to your character, do they believe they may have caused or deserved it, or are they quick to blame others?

He's usually more of a "shit happens" kinda guy so neither, I guess. He does have his moments of pondering if he deserved being condemned from his homeland and everything beyond that. But he knows logically that he doesn't, he's a good man.

Describe a scenario in which your character feels most uncomfortable.

Hmm. I can't think of specific scenarios but I can list some things that make him uncomfortable ig? fjdskl. He's not a fan of confrontation, especially if it gets heated. He also has a hard time admitting when he's wrong and has made a mistake but isn't above it.

Hakon:

Is your character’s current socioeconomic status different than it was when they were growing up?

Yeah, definitely. Hakon grew up fairly poor with little access to a proper education, and he was often doing any labor job he could get his hands on to help ends meet. But now as the vestige and a very well renowned mercenary, he has quite the income and is incredibly well-off financially.

In what situation was your character the most afraid they’ve ever been?

Being kidnapped by the Worm Cult and having his soul stolen by Mannimarco 😭. Someone being able to knock out and lug his giant ass around to do that ritual is unsettling as is but then waking up totally helpless while some emo mf (who happens to be your bestie's idol) rips your soul out of your body before sending you to Coldharbor to get tortured for who knows long would be terrifying to most.

What is your character’s biggest relationship flaw? Has this flaw destroyed relationships for them before?

He has SO many issues, oh my god. But he haaaaaates being doted on/taken care of or anything of the sort. He can't stand it. It makes him feel weak and useless which can definitely seem ridiculous and maybe it is, but he's spent much of his life having the fact that he needs to be a provider and caregiver and that he can't be weak drilled into his mind. So it can be a struggle to maintain balance with him in that regard. Idk if it's destroyed any relationships but it definitely causes problems. He gets better as time goes on.

What was your character’s favorite toy as a child?

He didn't have many toys but he was fond of a teddy bear his mother got for him. Definitely went with him everywhere when he was little and he probably named it something simple like fluffy. It's long gone by now though.

[phighting-tal-au]

…huh?

I am.....haha...bias though...

huh...

Why do you care?

just curious...

He....isn't...he was in prison...he was bad...! bad bad bad....

oh....oh gosh...

tried to kill the world....I don't know why....

oh geez...he seemed awful...

I missed when he was...just...my god...if he hadn't had gone mental i'd still be in that cult...

oh...he went that far over the edge...?

tried to....destroy everything....

oh, Swords...

I...I still don't know...if his care was true or not...

yeah...Gods can be very finicky...

(*She pulls away from butcher...standing back up*) Banhammer probably needs help....injury hasn't stopped me in the past...

Do I just wait here, or...?

You can look around....just don't....touch any of the levers....and don't mind the.....screams.

yeah, no, I'm used to hearing screams. I don't touch levers. Last time that happened, I had a whole-ass cow carcass fall on me. It hurt like a some-bitch.

[popculturebuffet]

Pirate Month Patreon: Our Flag Means Death: "Pilot" Review (Patreon Review for Emma Fici)

Yo ho all you happy people! Pirate Month continues.. somehow. With some. The last few weeks have been rough seas, but pirate month sails on. And ironically, into the waters of HBO Max

Yeah after my shockingly popular rant last week, seriously any of you following or coming in from that or just in general

It's great to have you. But yes we're back to the dumpster fire that was once one of the proudest and best streaming services around but is now a self canablizing nightmare that won't go away. I've went from hoping any adaptation went here to hoping many flee in terror and praying some still actually get made. You used to hear me constantly singling disney out for their idiocy

But this somehow tops most of what they've ever done. These shows MIGHT return or someone else might be able to save the company, but for now we're just stuck praying anything we care about dosen't get cannonballed into oblivion and left where it's avaliablity is tenious at best. So why am I reviewing something from the network at the worst possible moment? Simple.. this was planned before. Emma has a busy schedule, so she tends to pick her patreons late unless I ask early, and being a forgetful sort, I can tend to. She's GOOD at it, with her picks having had me review incest civil war laser tag, badly animated sci fi nonsense and this glory

So it was only pure Parker Luck that HBO Max decided to canablize their animation for profit the same week I was set to cover this. But I realized something important: With access uncertain, with HBO max striking randomly and insanely, and with no safe harbor... I have to get off my ass and watch stuff that may be destroyed as soon as the next season is out, and as we've seen with Summer Camp Island it can happen BEFORE too, instead of waiting. Sure this project having a high profile creator attached, being a very high profile queer work , and having a huge fanbase MIGHT be a enough.. but given Logic and tact haven't really entered into this current dumbfuckery, it's best to see the series and review an episode NOW rather than wait and loose it in a tax writeoff next year after season 2.

So several paragraphs and f-you's later, we arrive at our real destination: Our Flag Means Death. And this really has been one i've been meaning to check out for some time: It's produced by Taika Watiti, whose lately become one of my faviorite creators: He's director of the all time cinematic classics What We Do In The Shadows and JoJo rabbit and the fun as hell Thor films Ragnarok and Love and Thunder, and created the excellent What We Do In The Shadows tv show, which is also on the pile. Feel free to boo I know I am, i'm missing peak Matt Berry by being behind on it, as well as producing another show i've heard nothing but good things about, Reservation Dogs. The guy is a genius so while he isn't writer or director here, and his character Blackbeard isn't in this pilot, he clearly picks projects he puts his name on very carefully and if he's remotely involved with something, it's usually a good sign it's awesome. Add in Rhys Dharby who I first fell in love with on flight of the conchords as Murray...

And while he could've easily stopped with this cult classic I also need to watch (I mostly followe dit via music videos when it was airing and haven't watched it despite having easy access since max launched because i'm stupid and forget it's there), he has since made a sizeable name for him as a voice actor. Seriously while he mostly plays smaller parts he's popped up in TONS of shows since the late 2010's, from Milo Murphy's Law, RIP, to Rise of the TMNT , also RIP, to shows that aren't dead probably. He's played warthogs, snowflakes, gay hypo's, evil pistachios and more but really hasn't as far as I can tell been a leading man in anything. He was important to FOTC, but this seems like the first time the guy has REALLY been let loose and thus that was a huge draw for me.

And i'm happy to say that even before it hits it's peak and becomes a gay love story involving blackbeard, something I didn't know I needed and can't wait to hit as I watch more episodes, Our Flag Means death is an instant classic from the pirate and has finally given Rhys the meaty starring role he's always been capable of. The show is everything I hoped for.

While most of you reading this are likely fans of the show already, a quick refresher for those who aren't as familiar, i.e. Emma most likely: Our Flag Means Death follows Stede Bonnet, based on the real life pirate I know nothing about of the same name, a posh aristocrat who fled his old life to become a pirate, and is trying to clean up piracy a bit: He pays his men wether their succesful or not, and built his ship, the awesomely named The Revenge, with a sauna, rec area, and a personal library he'd be glad to lend out to the crew if any of them besides his assitant, the equally posh Lucius, played by Nathan Foad. Like a large chunk of the cast, i've never heard of him but like said chunk, he's excellent so it really dosen't matter. Steed does compensate by reading the pirates a story every night, as of the pilot Pinnochio. He's essentially trying to run this pirate ship like a modern work place, basically if Micheal Scott and Leslie Knope got combined in some horrible teleporter accident and became a pirate, having the bad need to be loved and have a family and be liked as the other, but like the latter having some compietence, optiism and good intentions, just being too naive to realize how hard ti's going to be to get these through.

Unlike other work coms though, the crew can actually kill their boss if he annoys them too much and the pilot centers around that, with the crew preparing a mutiny, with the only ones not being on board as much being Oluwande, played by Samson Kayo, a kind sort whose fond of the captain even if he's not the best and Jim, a seeming mute great with knives played by Vico Ortiz.. who turns out to be nonbinary. Which is good for me I got spoiled on that as it means I won't get any prounounds long. Though none of the crew is bad, it's just how change is: the rest simply can't accept that stede's way of doing things is PROBABLY better and he just needs to grow into the position, with Oluwande being the only one aware that not only is this much better.. but that it's so rare it' sbest to enjoy it while he lasts. Hey I said he appriacates the captain, I didn't say he was in denial about Stede's odds of survivial. Leading the mutiny is the lisping Black Pete (Matthew Maher) , a wannabe tough guy who claims to have been on blackbeards boat and won't shut up about it and the Jerry from Parks and Rec looking Kristian Nairin as Wee John, a giant who wants to burn things. Naturally I love him.

So to offset the mutiny after several small insignifigant raids, Stede targets the biggest/only ship they can see and with Buttons conformation the crew gets ready to have a bloody good time gettin good and bloody.. but Stede has a full on Panic Attack as we flash back to his past. And this is where the show really got me. See I throughly enjoyed it and was on board to this point, the jokes were that kind of goofy creative type of humor I enjoy from Stede telling everyone to "look scary' to the crew only not killing him at the moment because he's one of the only two people who can read, the only one who can do the voices and they want to know how Pinocchio ends, and Stede deciding the best way to help with disatsifaction at first is a flag design contest. It's truly my kind of show.

But what takes it from really good to great is making stede far more complex than he appears. Don't get me wrong, I don't mind a work just being a goofy comedy. That's fine by me and Producer Watiti did wonders with that with What We Do In The Shadows, which had moments of pathos but was mostly just the story of a bunch of goofy vampires in new zeland and their dark bidding on the interent.

So series creator and showrunner David Jenkins could've kept at that and i'd of been fine.. but he took it one step further without undercutting the wacky tone entirely, which can be tricky but he pulls off well. From here we start seeing pieces of Stede's old life.. and it was miserable. The first flashback here has a butcher working for the family slaughter an animal in front of the kid, tell him not to look away then mock him for being soft.

Which is thinly coded as people bullying him for coming off gay. Spoilers, Stede turns out to be VERY gay., but it's always a dickish thing to do to bully someone for being diffrent and to be a homophobic twitsandwitch.

But we see through later flashbacks in teh ep Stede never fit in: He was bullied at school, chased, called slurs and then had his hands tied to oars and forced to row and at home there was literal distance between him and his family... no seriously he sat at one end while his family sat at the other

Stede was an outsider in his own home, his own LIFE, never accepted by anyone it seemed (other episodes may prove this wrong) and even now trying to find a new family, he's not really accepted. While the metaphor there given Stede is also a gay man and a not tradtionally masculine man, is subtle a knife to the eye, it still works because it dosen't overshadow the story but plays into it. Stede is not conventional.. yet he's a good man and while he may not be a good pirate YET his ideas aren't bad and he has his heart in the right place. I mean until someone cuts it out and holds it up as a trophy but for now he's trying to do the right thing he's just out of his depth. BUt he had no real other options: He coudln't get a divorce, given the century, his family , both immedite and other clearly never got him.. leaving to be a pirate, to try ANYTHING else is better than dying on the inside. He also uses the money he came from well: He gives his men a good wage, a tidy ship, and plenty of supplies. Odds are it'll run out.. but he's trying to do something better and more rich people coudl take a note from this fictional gay pirate and try and be better instead of hoarding wealth or cutting people's lifes works from a platform for 2.50 and an expired free pizza cupon.

Turns out though the ship.. is a HEAVILY armed royal naval warship and our heroes only don't die horribly because the Captain, Nigel Badmitton, a gloriously pompus name, is one of Stede's old bullies and thus dosen't buy the rumors that Stede is a pirate and Stede is able to quickly hide the crew as fellow aristocrats and servants.

The meal though is .. uncomfortable. Not only are the pirates naturally not really happy in the roll of high society snobs, but Badmittons crew are a bunch of racist twits who are unplesant to be around, and Badmittion himself a snobby bully who fondly recalls that incident with the oars I mentioned while the rest of the crew slowly get that "Okay this guy is a dumbass but he's OUR dumbass. " Things naturally break down once Stede is forced to humor badmittion and after one joke too many and Badmittion LAUGHIGN at the idea he could be a pirate, Stede tries braining him with a move Oluwande taught him.. and accidently makes the guy fall on his saber and into his eye

While the rest of the crew has a nice bloody massacre of most of Badmittions men after one's a racist to Oluwande starting with jim throwing a knife through a hand. While we don't see it, by the time Stede gets back to them only two are left alive and he's panicking over the corpse, not ready to have really killed someone, and only accepting it because Oluwande helps him, knowing that admitting to killing the guy will help the crew respect Stede.. which it does. Stede cements he can be badass for more than just accidedental murders by giving the one person they send back the same punishment his now dead captain gave Stede, showing that while Stede is out of his element, has clear trauma and may not be happy killin, which is a fair choice.. he's still got what it takes and thus his crew decides he can live for now. Also Jim's not a man OOOOO ALREADY SPOILED IT, and we end on a really nice bit: it being clear no matter how bad it was stede misses his family and treis to convince himself he's got a new one.. and him reading the crew pinoccio. Never has Rhys Darby reading a bunch of grown men to sleep been so touching.

So yeah Our Flag Means Death, at least the pilot is fucking fantastic. I don't know why the creators previous show failed: this one has style, humor and suprising tragedy, and excells at what it's producer does well: taking a mildly goofy but cool genre and poking fun at it while taking it JUST seriously enough to ground it. Our Flag Means Death is everything I hoped for and more and I highlyr ecommend watching it before it possibly burns. These are uncertain times.. but with Rhys Darby as a gay pirate... they might have some good times hidden in them too.