#I might finish writing something later tho I just wanted to be a functioning human being and write at a normal time

[phantom-does-a-thing]

Me having ideas to write and wanting to write them:

Merry-Go-Round life grabbing me by the jugular:

[jackrrabbit]

ask answering/updates

first of all, thank you 💘 second of all...

ok ok ok don’t get too excited, but I finally got the juice to start working on the next part of Fanatic 🖤 most of you guys will be like ‘who cares’ but i know some of you have been waiting for this for a while! it’s been what, 2 months?? hope I’m not jinxing myself by saying this *knocks on wood* also not to hype myself too much but it’s kinda bomb 😳 maybe this is just my sick bias but I’ve really been wanting to write about...aftermath iykwim haha. reader all scared & shy & trying to avoid him but yk he’s not going to leave her alone :P

I also figured out the ending to it will come back!! it wouldn’t be shiggy if it didn’t get dangerous 😈 also gonna be nice to write some eyes-rolling-back-in-the-head fuckery so our favorite handsy creep can finally get his dick wet with his beloved little nursey <3

here are some other vague ideas, some based on requests, some not. as always no promises!!

BNHA—pillage & plunder with fantasy AU warlord Bakugo (and his gang of ruffians?? hmm...)

BNHA—Overhaul makes you work off your daddy’s gambling debts the extra hard way uwu...also I have SO many ideas for Overhaul 😷 after I finish iwcb my next multi-part fic will probably be with him

BNHA—various things with reader as an aspiring villain set in the same universe as Caught in the Act: reader getting quarantined with shiggy & dabi...dabi getting mad at you after you keep fucking up...incel shiggy jacking it to his adorable protégée without her knowledge (a galaxy brain request from a very good buddy!!!!)

BNHA—ABO with alpha Hawks and omega reader in an elevator...and uh-oh, it’s stuck! and you’re going into heat! oh no, whatever will you do??

Haikyuu—you get stuck in a hole in a wall, good thing your dutiful boyfriend Kuroo is there to help you out ;)

Haikyuu—gangbang with Tsukki, Bokuto, Akaashi, and Kuroo...a challenge bc I’ve never written a gangbang before!! will have to do some research 🧐

Haikyuu—your bf Atsumu does mean things when he’s jealous, like putting his hands up your skirt in public

KNY—Kokushibou decides to keep a shrine maiden as his cute little human pet 💜 actually already wrote pt. 1 but I’ll wait to post til I’m done with Fanatic

AxK—just some no good very bad yandere content with Dr. Midori...neglect play stuff...sensory deprivation stuff...icky icky

Gintama—something with Kamui. does this count as monsterfucking? very very rough...idk what exactly? some form of dastardly acts

thanks for the concern friends 💕💕 I’ve been preoccupied by things happening irl for the past few weeks, trying to educate myself, going to protests, etc.

also in case anyone else is confused, my stance is and always has been that Black lives matter and all cops are bastards. I’m not sure my porn blog is the right place to talk about this at length but if you’re a bootlicker, please smash that unfollow button and don’t let the door hit you on the way out. if you don’t already have a decently functioning moral compass you should not get anywhere near my writing...fr

learn more and get involved

omg thank you & yes yes a million times yes!!! hope you don’t mind commitment issues and student loan debt 💝👯‍♀️

the line between not hawksfucker and hawksfucker is very thin and very blurry, beware.....lol and thank you!!

the video you recommended...like damn!!! that’s exactly the vibe I feel like fratty Hawks x reader from be a little bad would be like if they had a happy ending eventually (start at 1:39)!!!!! “I didn’t make you do this” “I’m not accusing you of anything” it’s that exact dynamic. imo Hawks might be a little less willing to make things official and reader would prob have a hard time being straightforward enough to ask tho...hmmm

I did get several requests for a part 2! I’m thinking it over atm. I will say tho that most of my reqs have very slow turnaround so if I write it, it might be a while

ooh I love getting recommendations! here’s what I like:

fanfic: I read stuff like what I write (smut, kink, yandere, villains). at some point I’m going to make a long post of fic recs of my own! I also read fluff and character x character ship fic so interests are pretty broad

TV: humor, crime shows like Bones, Criminal Minds, Psych, that kind of thing. nothing too dark or complicated, nothing that requires too much investment. same goes for anime

movies: pretty much everything! lately I’m really into Howl’s Moving Castle and Once Upon a Time in Hollywood

books: literary fiction. can I say I’m into dark academia if the only dark academia I’ve read is The Secret History? favorite books I’ve read semi-recently are TSH, All the Light We Cannot See, The Poisonwood Bible, and Discipline & Punish. currently reading Foucault’s History of Sexuality

music: idk man...all kinds of stuff. I listen based on vibe more than genre. all my spotify playlists are named things like “sunday” and “the power” and “[sparkle emoji]”. my artists on repeat are Hozier, The Weeknd, Kendrick, M.I.A., The Neighborhood (F I’m a basic bitch) but I’ll try anything once

jfc these two asks have given me so much hope 🥰😭💗 you know what? sooner or later I’m going to post Kamui x reader smut and it’s going to get 3 notes from the three of us liking it and that’s okay because I’ve thirsted over this man too long and too hard to go my entire life without reading over-indulgent reader-insert porn of him. yes the villain kink jumped out but DAMN!!! the man has ‘h*rny scumbag who lets his instincts rule him’ baked into both his DNA and his psyche, and I’m so here for it 😌

if you don’t know who Kamui is, do me a favor and watch gintama. yes there are like 400 episodes but it’s worth it. I will convert more bitches to the gintama thirst train if it costs me my life. Kamui was made to star in disrespectful breeding kink smut and this is a hill I will die on.

??? sure, if you can point me toward part 2 ????? lmao

I’m guessing you meant to ask for a pt 2 instead of pt 3? in which case, thanks for asking!! but tbh...for some reason I have a really hard time imagining what a pt 2 would look like, maybe because I wrote it 100% from Overhaul’s POV so it’s hard for me to define the reader’s feelings. I’m not saying it’ll never happen but 🤷‍♀️

HOWEVER if it’s Overhaul content in general you’re craving, you’re in luck!!! he’s a favorite of mine. legit he ticks so many of my boxes—villain kink? check. medical/scientist kink? check. yakuza kink? honey I’m weak. I’ll definitely be writing more for him in the future!

oh no! I checked it on my computer & on mobile and all of the links are working for me? are the links still broken for you guys?

anyway, here are the rules, here’s the short version of the request rules, and here is part 1 and part 2 of it will come back.

thank you to everyone who has sent kind words, everyone who replies to my writing, and everyone who posts thirst in the tags!!! I read that shit!!!! and it makes me fucking cry, I love you all

one more thing: several people have requested continuations to Sleepless, Sidekick, and Fanatic. on one hand, I’m so flattered that you guys want more!!! on the other hand, I actually already answered asks about pt. 2′s for those particular fics. before you request a continuation of anything, it’s probably a good idea to look up the name of the fic as a tag on my blog so you can check and see if anyone else had the same question 💖💖💖

[echo-inthevoid]

Season 2 q&a and overall reaction

Jonny stealing everyone's names XD 

Is martin going to be ok!? I also need to know! 

He said no;-; 

ok ya, no one's gonna be ok. 

Ya, he must do sooo much research. 

Ya, except for "fatigue" lol.

Eyyy the mechanisms!! 

What's the red string brigade? Ok, I guess a group of fans theorizing about stuff. 

Oh ok so someone else did martins poetry. Ooh, there's more martin poetry out there! *grabby hands*

Ok ya, Alex clarifying that Jon isn't stupid he just makes poor decisions. Probably if he'd paused and thought about it (like I did lol, I had to go do some stuff in the middle of that ep and thought about it a whole bunch lol) instead of immediately going out and buying an axe and further isolating himself and panicking immediately he probably would have figured it out. This is why it's bad to panic in a crisis guys. 

Eyyy! Jonny's parents voiced Gertrude and Leitner! That's so cool. 

XD Jonny grumbling about having to work with his parents. 

Hmm, I hadn't really thought of Gertrude being like a mother figure in the story? She just seems very cut-throat I guess from what Leitner said. Idk so far I've been very suspicious of her. Especially since that one statement where her photo burned a whole bunch of people or something. She just seems very shady... 

Alex chortling over Jonny's pain. XD

Side note, Every time there's a q&a I just can't stop noticing Jonny's voice going in and out of archivist range? Like most of the time I'm just listening along and then he'll say a sentence a bit grumblier and my brains immediately like "ARCHIVIST! That's THE ARCHIVIST!!" 

Martin would be the last one alive in Friday the 13th! It's official! 

(Is it bad that this gives me hope)

Jon likes Nonfiction, documentaries, and probably collects something just a little bit weird. *writes down for use in potential fics* 

also while im at it I remember jon saying he dislikes coffee at one point,  and so many people have him liking coffee in their fics! This has been your daily reminder of that fact because ever since then it keeps bugging me lol. (But also do whatever u want.)

Alex's spluttering sounds so much like Martin.

Yes!! I want to hear jon sing!! Yes! Musical Episode When!!?

Ah yes yes yes! All the characters are so unique!!? How does he do it!! 

Ya, it being in audio format sometimes makes it hard to understand what's happening in the live-action bits. (Live-action is the wrong word but u know what I mean.)

Oh ok ya, how he mentioned he got a pipe was quite clever I didn't realize that that's why he mentioned it at all. 

Ooh, there's a manga where there's something similar to Michael? I'll have to look that up later...

XD Alex and Jonny arguing about apples. 

Ok, so all the statements we're hearing ARE for reals. I kinda assumed but good to have it confirmed.

They used to hang out together!!? Work function curry nights!! ;-; 

Ya Ya! Who made the leitners!?

"You are assuming a book needs to be written" ...ok then. (but it has to have been created somehow??? Did they just spring fully formed from the powers? why? And why take the form of books?)

Alex's mischievous laugh about whether jon has friends *trembles in fear*

Yes!! Micheal is so good! I'm so happy they love him too! Yesyes! His laugh! 

Ah Yes!! Mary kaey was so creepy! 

XD yes yes yes fatigue was written on zero sleep, I knew it! 

Akskdjdkd I love them so much. Also, I've looked up Michaels voice actor luke booys and he does some other horrory type sketches n stuff and I kiiinda want to do a little animatic with some of those but it's Michael like annoying some poor soul lost in his halls... I think that'd be fun. I wonder if anyone's done that yet? If so someone send me the links I neeeed iiitt :3

Season 2 summary:

Uuuuu ya so this season was really good. I kinda listened to it in bursts of about ten episodes every couple weeks and then have been saving up the reactions to post later so these are usually going up about a week or so after I actually listened to the episode just FYI. 

I also do have a lot of spoilers cause I can't keep myself away from fanfic and people don't always tag for spoilers and I kiiinda wana know what's coming beforehand anyway? Idk it's hard man I get very stressed about what might happen and then also listening to too much at a time is too spooky for my poor little heart so I gotta read the less spooky fanfic to fulfill the hyperfixation you see. (If anyone has fanfic with spoilers only up to season 2 that'd be great btw) 

Anyway, I try not to take spoiler type stuff into account unless I'm just so sure of it I can't really not acknowledge that I know about it. 

Also, can I just talk about Michael for a minute?? Cause he's such a unique character? And I guess maybe there are other characters like him but I haven't ever seen one -tho to be fair tma is only like the third horror thing I've ever really got into (the other two are the SCP Foundation in its various forms and Little Nightmares. Hence why I keep making reference to SCP it's really the only thing I know similar to this.) But he's such a cool concept!!? Like someTHING that still has a personality? He's so not human? Like I get what he says but also I don't really? Idk im pretty sure he's an avatar right? Right?? Idk if that means he was a person at some point? But all this to say that he is probably the most inhuman character I've come across so far and I'm trying to figure out what it is about him that's so "other" to me? Like... I don't really know what Micheal's deal is? he seems to want to be sort of a neutral mischief-maker but also it seems like he keeps getting invested. But also I just love the way he talks about himself. Like he's a monster that has a personality and is fully intelligent but isn't just evil but isn't neutral either and certainly isn't benevolent. Like he's so complex and just,,,, the idea of a "thing" that's got a personality?? I love it? Kind of like dryads or spirits of things? Like the idea that after a long time things gain personality just by existing? Not that that's what Michael is necessarily? but that same sort of concept applies to him I think. Like the way he IS the maze and wants to help but wants to just watch but wants to kill them all. He's just so interestinggggggg. (And another vision of what jon could become?)

 also "es Mentiras" is a beautiful name 💕

So are him and not-Sasha avatars? Not-Sasha also seems completely inhuman and I was under the impression that avatars were (or used to be) human? Or are they like personifications of their power? Do all the powers have personifications of themselves. not-Sasha seems even less human than Michael? Like she seems to just really genuinely enjoy causing fear? Tho I guess we didn't really get to hear a lot of her. She just seemed kinda gleefully angry most of the time we heard from her. Was she... Human once!???

Anyway. Also, can I just talk about leitners line about jon belonging to the eye!!? Just..*chefs kiss* hnnnngg I need more jon grappling with that. I just need more everyone dealing with the fallout post all of the finallies ok? I still need more of jon angsting over his worms scars and stuff and now I also need jon freaking out about belonging to a fear god power thing. 

Also Martin! Is Martin ok? He sure did a lot of yelling which he doesn't usually? Look I love him and he actually thinks before he acts (unlike SOME people *looks at jon*) and he writes poetry and it is pretty good poetry ok!! And he cares about everyone and just wants a happy ending and aaaaa😭

Petition to get some statements from Martin's pov tho? I mean that's not gonna happen cause Jon's the archivist but I want more martin pov!! Maybe we can get some of his poem tapes??? Pls????? 

I feel so bad for Tim. It sounds like he's kinda fallen into despair.

Also Elias!!? Is showing his spooky side!!? He can control cameras and beat a man to death with a pipe!!? This is his "place of powerr"!!? I am afeared!!? At least jon knows he shouldn't trust him now. Oh jeez, I wonder if jon will listen back to the tape and know what happened. Thhhatsss rough. Oh dear, I hope he doesn't feel guilty cause Leitner did keep trying to hurry him and now everyone thinks it was him. Even martin thinks he did it? Wich like I kinda want to hear more of his thoughts on that? How much does he believe that jon did it? Tim certainly seems pretty certain but he's a bit biased and cynical right now so. 

And they were in the maze for DAYS? 

Now I need martin recovering from being stuck with Tim in Michaels maze for days being angry and worried and hungry etc... Dksjdksa knowing jon could be dying RIGHT NOW and there's nothing he can do. Please someone give me the fic links if this exists!! I've already written like 5 drabbles based entirely on spoilers/other fics (which I'll probably post (w/ links to their inspirations) once I'm caught up and can make sure I'm not just completely demolishing cannon lol. 

Leitner didn't even scream or yell or anything when he was murdered. Literally the chillest dude ever. F

Overall super great, Elias is terrifying, let's dive into the next season!!! I've got 2 seasons to finish in like, less than 2 or so weeks(?) if I wana be caught up by season 5 hhhh,,,

Better get started I guess. 

[brokenfoetus]

Hmmmm... What has been up? Yes?

Hello Human Friends, Trying to half assed be a little more active. Very busy busy boi still as of late. Yes indeed. Still being lazy about the tags and tag games. There’s actually a ton I’ve wanted to do since they fun concepts. Been trying to manage time though, take advantage and try and catch up on my stuffs. So... the tags will probably come in a random and strange flood all at once when I have the free time.  I doubt people are on the edge of their seat waiting but... still. For the most part I’ve been just managing the sleep disorder + Chronic illness stuff.  Has it’s ups and downs but it’s not doing bad overall. So that is Nice yes...  stupid fleshbag and it’s weirdness.... Just been gearing up and setting equipment up for the stuff coming. More or less.... Upgrading to better software, and physical controllers etc. Upgrading some/most computer components to handle the workload that will be coming semi soon for... well... I mean... everything. Grabbed a laptop for travel/live performance that will be able to handle the workload of said software and potential audio/visual stuff I’d like to incorporate in the live shows eventually. Backing up files... so much files to go through... pretty sure I’ll be just throwing away most of what I have I mean... there’s so many pointless folders of absurd memes.... how many spider-man cartoon jokes can I seriously devote time to? Already backed up all the song files and samples tho.... Right now, focus is on configuring the controllers and setting up everything to work on the lap top  so I can keep working while I take apart my computer and rebuild it.  It shouldn’t take long but... there’s always those moments when you realize you forgot to grab something you needed and can’t finish so... lately I’m just trying to set up parallels so the transition goes smooth and I can reduce slow down in work flow. Enough time gets wasted by the sleepy time nonsense. Getting to do a sleep study semi soon. Will be nice to finally know what my brain is doing with it’s chemicals. Crazy oL’ Brain.... When I have time and it crosses my mind I’ll take a new picture of the current gear.... then later the setup when I finish all this mess.  It’s a good thing though. It’s basically preparation, so while I finish the album which I hope to soon.... I’ll be able to just slide into the new software and gear and start working on album 2.... New instruments etc... will be nice to move on and progress the sound pretty much.  A lot of stuff to setup and learn though.  Will come with time and use just need to get used to the new interfaces pretty much. I know what stuff does but... where it’s located in the new D.A.W. is another thing all together lol. I plan on finishing my album with the current older software... then recording the vocals and doing the final master of the track on the new software.  It’s just easier... especially since the stuff I write with is 10 years old... Doesn’t really have the functionality the new software has. So that will be rad... and using it to finish off the tracks will help with the transition into using it for the next bunch of noises etc etc.... blah blah blah.... I don’t remember what I mentioned last time I posted updates about the music stuff... I know a friend of mine has some contacts and would like to setup a mini EU tour type thing when possible. So we’re working on our stuffs and stuff together and not sure really what we’re touring as, we might just setup an End of it All tour.  Or we might tour together as something else entirely, or we might open for someone he knows, or we might do all of the above no real legit concrete plans yet... we know we wanna do something though. Will be cool when it happens.  Before that probably just some random small shows so I can get a feel for my set and see what feels right and what needs changing. Blah blah blah.... Oh yeah... got my drawing tablet to do the album art easier.... scanning physical media to touch it up in editing software to then make a file.... takes a lot longer... or I could just ya know... digitally do it... So... Yeah... there’s that.... I think that’s about it for this D.I.Y. EleKtr0 Meat-sack... back to work... -The End<3

[sobdasha]

"I definitely updated my list of books I was reading on tumblr so it's all good" -me, a lying liar, right before spending several months finishing my reread of All The Discworld Books I Own But In Chronological Order For The First Time Ever Which In Fact Makes A Difference.

(and then I did it again after the libraries closed)

The Left Hand of Darkness, Ursula K. Le Guin Hm, so. I definitely read this. At some point. It was not really for me, not bad, but not really for me. This particular edition had various notes before and after the text, all of which I read, which made it an experience I got more out of. It's important for me to know that the author is aware that the protagonist is a raging misogynist who's stupid, and yes this was on purpose so you'd realize how really incredibly stupid he is and thus maybe be tricked into changing your mind yourself. It is a legit tactic, but one I tend not to enjoy, so if I hadn't been forewarned I'd have been UUUUGGGGGHHHH MAKE HIM SHUT UP ALREADY and probably rage-quit. As it was, I was able to better appreciate what Le Guin was doing here, even if this book didn't win a place in my heart and I probably won't reread. I definitely preferred Ancillary Justice's take, with the feminine pronouns. For my brain, masculine pronouns = they might as well all be men = business as usual = I didn't really get any gender queering from it. I can't really remember much else now. Oh, it was also part "survival in the wilderness" story, which they're big on making you read in school (which I find very suspicious), and which I tolerated and read a few classic ones on my own until they kept assigning these kinds of stories for us to read and now I get nothing from them and mindlessly hate them. Anyway, as I said, not bad at all but not really for me.

Lavinia, Ursula K. Le Guin This one's a reread--I picked it up from the library during college because we were doing Titus Andronicus in class and it didn't occur to me that there might be more than one Lavinia???? But hey it worked out because later in college we did the Aeneid and then I had Background for rereading Lavinia. This is the book that is lyrical and beautiful and pulls me in and makes me care deeply about the world and the characters. This is the book of Le Guin's that makes me feel the way everyone else feels about Earthsea and The Left Hand of Darkness and etc. I would like to find more of Le Guin's work that makes me feel the same way, because as I've said you can really tell from her other stuff that she's a solid writer who knows her stuff. I just…don't enjoy any of the other things. Anyway I recommend. I always forget about this book, and then when I reread I'm like "wow why don't I read this more often?????"

How Long 'Til Black Future Month?, N. K. Jemisin I liked every story in this short story collection. I should just reread it and try writing this up again tbh but also tbh I'll probably do the rereading and then just not write anything up again. Just read Jemisin's stuff I love her writing so much okay. ETA: that’s exactly what I did, I reread this during my covid rereads and said “I should do a proper write-up this time” and lo and behold where is it

Tehanu, Ursula K. Le Guin Okay, this last Earthsea book treated me much better than the others. It's probably not for everyone else, which might be why it's for me. It's much more domestic, much less "plot" happening, full of introspection, and centered on women rather than men. This novel acknowledges and confronts the rampant internalized misogyny in the previous three books, engages it in a way that the misandrist in me finds satisfying even though it never comes to a good solution for the problem. This book is more like a reflection. Earthsea has never been about "light is always good, dark is always bad; be a hero, fight evil" etc. But this one I think shifts the tone a little farther; it's less about balance, and more...I guess I'd put it as, "actions have consequences." It's not concerned with right or wrong, it's concerned with people getting hurt. It's pretty somber and serious, without any humor to balance it out, tons of bad things happen to people, lots of PTSD...but this time I really cared about the characters, and I feel like it was all handled really well? In addition to critiquing internalized misogyny, it also critiqued victim blaming. Seemed like it handled disability pretty well too--was honest about how people are jerks about it in reality, while still being optimistic and treating Therru as valuable; made occasional mentions of considering work-arounds for having only one fully-functional hand, while mostly just having Therru go about living and doing chores and being capable and assuming she did find those work-arounds without having to draw attention to it; and Therru's terrible scars didn't get magically healed at the end, the whole book makes a point all the way through that her physical scars will always be with her the same way her emotional scars will be, and she's simply learned how to go on living with them. Tehanu: a book full of trauma happening to people, where what would normally be the plot in a fantasy novel ended up not even getting started to be resolved, but Le Guin's writing and handling of the subject matter helped heal my jaded soul.

Ninefox Gambit, Yoon Ha Lee A quick summary of my experience: Chapter 1 - ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh what is going on what even Chapter 2 - no, no this is just, this is what sci fi is like, right? Just give it a few chapters and then by the end of the book everything will probably make sense. I'm sure that's how it works. Remember how even in Ancillary Justice I ended up with two separate Battles of Valskay, but now everything is fine??? It's. Fine. Chapter 4 - (ohhhhhhh I still don't know what's going on) Several Chapters Later - still no clue what's going on, but hit my stride with the terminology, my foreign language instinct kicked in where words stopped sounding weird and while I could not for the life of me define any terms for you, I had a vague comprehension of how the words operated In Context. Sort of. And by then I had, without realizing it, begun page-turning and binging, so I guess I liked the book lol! Another serious-but-not-funny one, but with an extra dose of War Memoir and all the gruesomeness that entails (but probably, like any good War Memoir, probably not actually gratuitous and actually in fact the necessary amount of gruesome). Jedao was turned into a woobie at the last minute and, well, damn, guy knows the way to my heart. The novel apparently gripped me enough that I don't even mind that it only came into play at the very end of the game. And hey, there's two more novels to deal with that revelation, which I have picked up from the library to read immediately! Yay! Current personal theory: based on the heavy math references that made me want to cry at the start, but the almost entire absence of actual numbers, and a reference to "there's no way actual physics works like that, it was obviously a calendrical effect" or something…I'm going to throw out a wild guess that the calendar stuff (and all the social structuring that goes with it) is so that they can break and reinvent math. So they can effect a universe where 2+2=5 and therefore a bunch of people standing in this exact position makes a force field or bullets of rose thorns or whatever and some other dude can make himself immortal. This sounded like a pretty terrible theory already and it sounds even worse now I've typed it up but oh well.

Raven Stratagems, Yoon Ha Lee Guess who didn't write this up back when she read it!!! Also, I returned Ninefox Gambit to the library right before the libraries shut down for covid. So, I had Raven and Revenant on hand for months but I didn't have Ninefox on hand to do an immediate reread to see if that made the sci fi make more sense. (It probably wouldn't have, but I would have liked to do a rereading while the ending was still fresh.) By this time there is a lesser degree of visceral viscera. Lee is brutal, however, about continuing to be honest about what war costs and whether war is worth that cost (which depends, really, on whose lives you think matter. Very relevant for these times. Very much prepared me to shut up and not whine about the inconveniences of protests and their fallout. There is no pretty and clean way to have a revolution, since it involves destroying a particular [terrible] way of life, so we're all just gonna have to sacrifice together). Also I think by this point all the character development from the first novel paid off in the form of character dynamics being hilarious now despite, y’know, the gruesome shadow of war.

Revenant Gun, Yoon Ha Lee Continues to discuss the honest price of war and the messiness of fallout. Shuos "The risks I took were calculated, but boy am I bad at math" Jedao. Oh I think this is also the one where every so often one of the characters thinks, "Okay so this person is a tyrannical murderous dictator but he is ensuring that there will never again be food shortages and no one in the space empire ever goes hungry." And then Lee turns around and is like, "Haha but don't forget this same person invented a form of vital infrastructural technology (and also immortality) that is optionally based off ritual human torture sacrifice. Like he didn't have to do that to make it work. He just decided to anyway. And that's always bad :) " (Also useful in our current climate of "Okay but we should consider the other person's circumstances and point of view" and also "Yeah but that doesn't apply if they're literally Nazis tho.")

Hexarchate Stories, Yoon Ha Lee A collection of short stories set in the universe of those three books. There's one story at the end that does satisfy the "But I wanted another sequel!!!" urge. And there's a bit of backstory for Jedao and Cheris. But by and large what you should be in the mood to read is flash fiction snippets that simply happen to be set in the same universe but have no bearing on the plot. Which is pretty cool and interesting if you are in the proper mindset! Even better, Lee includes author's notes at the end of each story to talk about the story, or the influences, or the context of his life at the time, etc etc. That is always my absolute favorite part of a short story collection. Also these notes told me everything I needed to know about why I liked certain things about his writing. "I wanted to write my own AUs," "If I get stuck I go on TV Tropes," "My only regret is that I had to cut the scene where Jedao goes to ~Halloween~ dressed as himself and trolls people" ahhhh that's also a regret I share.

Dragon Pearl, Yoon Ha Lee This one is YA! There is a lot less gore although I guess there was still genocide! Read this when you are in the mood for something that doesn't attempt to hide the fact that the plot is completely, conveniently contrived to give you fast-paced action and fun. Min sure has a lot of coincidental meetings that should stretch my disbelief but I don't care. Also, I am enjoying reading books with girls as protagonists that do what I'm tired of being told to love about boy protagonists--just keep barreling along with complete self-assurance that you are right and, if you run into trouble, you can egotistically figure your way out.

The Hundred Thousand Kingdoms, N. K. Jemisin Gods and mortal ruling family's messy soap opera sexcapades is not exactly my favorite genre, but luckily it is handled by Jemisin so it's all good. Lots of Souma Family Values. I'm really appreciating how Jemisin considers choice of narrator very carefully and uses it to brilliant effect in this trilogy. Stories are things told by a narrator to an audience; why should we rely on the artifice of an "impartial" "reliable" "omniscient" 3rd person narrator writing into the void? This trilogy was Jemisin's first, I believe, so it's a little awkward coming back to them now, only because Jemisin is such a powerful writer that the themes she's begun working with here have only gotten stronger with each successive work.

The Broken Kingdoms, N. K. Jemisin This one I rated as I read for Protagonist Is Blind based on the scale of a sighted person going "but some of my best friends are blind!" In that regard, I think the book does really well! Blindness doesn't define Oree's life and value; Oree doesn't get magical powers that make her a blind person who isn't really blind; Oree moves away from home and gets a job and lives on her own which seems very accurate to me based on my knowledge of one (1) person who is blind; instead of being ~cured~, Oree actually gets more blind at the end of the story and this is considered a Good Ending. Also personal bonus points are awarded for references to her stick being handy for hitting people with. Some stuff was stereotypical, but Jemisin's intent was not. A+, will read again, please support including way more characters who are blind in media. Anyway I enjoyed this one.

The Kingdom of Gods, N. K. Jemisin First off, Jemisin directly up front critiques the narration choices she made in the first two books and then pays it off like a boss at the end. Like holy crap. I admit by now I was getting a bit bored of the genre, but the book was still very engaging because Jemisin is a master. It may also have been affected by how much increasing pain I've been in lately.

The Awakened Kingdom, N. K. Jemisin I'm dead. This one was way more my speed and you need the other three books to understand this novella but ohhhh my god it's perfect. I read a lot of choice passages of this aloud to my roommate because how could you resist. It's still heavy but it's hilarious. Bless Shill.

[thrcshold-blog]

i’ve been laughing at this gif for five minutes straight, hELPSFDKJGSDF

hey guys !! i’m kat, 21 yo struggling uni student from east coast canada who’s whipped for fromis, boa and brockhampton and currently ignoring finals prep in favour of typing my soon-to-be bland and long-winded intro ! sjfkgdf so i’m gonna get to the point as quickly as possible and present my messy sagi baby, zoe who’s kinda just. cracked tbh. you can check out her ( slightly unfinished ) stats HERE, and like this or im me if you’d like to plot !

EDIT: btw, my d*scord's EXO'S BITCH#2030 if anyone wants to hmu over there !

< park jiwon, cis female, she/her, twenty-one > welcome to the witching community of chicago, ZOE RYU ! you’re a HEDGE WITCH right ? some of the locals around here have described you as being RESTLESS and CANDID, but others have said you’re PERCEPTIVE and VERSATILE. i guess i’ll have to see for myself. now, being a hedge witch, i hear you excel at DREAM MANIPULATION. the chicago witching community prides itself on having skilled witches so make sure to keep practicing !  < kat, 21, nt >

so i still haven’t figured out the full backstory with her but i’ll edit this a little later when i have my wits about me sjglfgd

that aside, zoe grew up with her parents in a suburb of halifax, canada and it was a fairly simple life they had — papa ryu's a hedge witch and is just living a chill life as a cop.. just handling a lot of petty crimes and traffic violations bc i’m p sure halifax is about the same criminally as my own province dklgsg

and her mom’s a green witch who’s like, the closest thing to a hippie that you can get given she’s got a policeman for a husband sgkdfjsgfdkl anyways she did her own Thing by running her family’s little garden centre uptown before delving into a venture with a uh, microbrewery 

that whole set up sounds Dumb but. one of her parents has to be cracked like zoe in some ways and it clearly won’t be her dad so ! moving on !

sdfhjhgsh so zoe was a middle child with an older brother and twin smols of opposite sexes, and the only one of the four to end up becoming a hedge witch, or showing signs of becoming one i should say, like her dad ! she was always an imaginative and creative kid — something her mom especially let her expand upon — and a little wise beyond her years

she often had vivid dreams and, in her soon-to-be proven crackhead fashion, would tell them in a dramatic, outlandish way

the bitch was born to be a Loud theatre kid. anyways DKSFGJDSGFK

her dad saw this and other little things as a sign that she might just become a hedge witch like him and was Hyped, so like any proud parent he.......... kinda projected buT with good intentions

ig ?? idk but yeah, a hedge witch she would become sdglkgdk

she did delve into her powers and was interested in being a Good little witch, but she likely didn’t make it her top priority if the rest of this intro will be anything to go by 

her school life was p ordinary, she was extroverted and enthusiastic but so fucking Annoying all the same

performed decently but def excelled in language arts/english. not just saying that bc Me but —

joined the drama club in high school and was a little thespian until she graduated and headed off to uni at acadia for an arts degree !

but after a couple of years, and despite the friends she had there, she took a step back. def the type of person to wanna escape and explore, and her studying so close to home limited her ability to do that

so she moved to chicago like, a couple of months before tr*mp became president-elect bc she would’ve cancelled everything, demanded her deposit back, had she arrived after that SKLDFGSDGFL

her brother had been a little more focused on his abilities than she had been at the time, and had visited a couple of larger witching communities to idk, see what they were like ?? since theirs was quite small in comparison; and he told her about them only for her to decide to check one of them out for a bit

and she picked chicago bc....... tbh she only really picked chicago on a whim, and her weird love for that one episode of victorious with trina doing her one woman show might’ve played the smallest role in it all KDSGJKDSGF

so she’s been here for a couple of years now and had started her studies again a couple of months back at a uni near her little apartment ( haven’t checked out possible places to add to her stats just to have a uni Set, so i’ll do that later gdklsdg )

and that’s really it for her bg !

PERSONALITY, SPECIALTY BG AND OTHER SHIT

so she needs action or something of interest in her life to keep her Up, but the feeling can fade quickly

like i said, she left her province — and country — to experience more, both in her abilities and in general; and while the latter is a little defunct given her time here already, whatever else comes with it tends to keep her from wanting to run off to the next enthralling adventure as soon as she possibly can

she also can’t sit still for v long if we wanna keep this short and show less Grand ideas sgdklfg

given her partially goofy ass, it’s hard to fathom her as being a blunt, serious or even snide person, but she can be given the situation or..... perhaps it’s just how she is in the moment sdjgsfdg

zoe does, however, show her blunt side in a more quick-witted, casual way than serious so it’s unlikely that you’ll see her act up, and uncommon but definitely not rare to see her be mature and handle shit accordingly

idk if that made sense but we’re gonna keep going for now sdgkjgdf

she’s a solid, loyal person, but she’s also quite observant and wise — well, wise when she wants to be anyways

and she’s definitely NOT a mary sue, but she is, as i said in her app, versatile

she’s adaptive in certain settings and situations, she doesn’t limit herself in what she can and can’t do and is a semi-functional multitasker DGKHJDF

the second thing prob has something to do with her ( over ) confidence but anyways

uhhhhh last but not least, she’s a Crackhead.

SFJGDDFSG

she’s a living, breathing level 4 shitposter and my patience is definitely gonna wear thin with this brat, i sweaR

tho at the end of the day, she’s chill despite it. by some miracle at least

when it comes to dream manipulation, she’s always found it to be cool

and one thing that makes it rewarding and interesting is how it would help her little sister with nightmares when she started becoming proficient at the actual manipulation aspect of it

bc who wouldn’t use a power to help a distressed kid :(

eventually it’s escalated to her just chilling with her mom in her dreamland bc phone and skype calls are boring af and not enough for them to be dumb bitches together sdgfklsgfdj

and to just fuck around with her neighbours and what not. in a good way

........ for the most part, the witch can’t guarantee that the rude girl down the hall won’t see her long-time crush run off with zoe out of subtle revenge for knowingly closing the elevator door in her face when she had her arms full of grocerieS —

and while it is.. p invasive, it also fuels her creativity by using some elements as inspiration for her writing 

it’s an ethical dilemma that she wrestles with, rest assured folks

what else, what else.............

she’s good with her family if i didn’t imply it enough

she’s bi but..... girls disappoint her far less than guys so she has a Preference DJFGSKGDKF

likes to act like she isn’t a massive party girl but, she’s a massive party girl

how else will she release her pent-up energy ?? sgkjhgsdj

loves garlic fingers, but bc america’s behind on shit from what ik, she’s as disappointed as i am that she has no access to them

spits.

honestly, she’s just v atlantic canadian when it comes to food, her fondness for fog and the ocean and neither are Really a thing in this part of the states so she’s struggliNG still

uh, feels like the only one who’s following a more...... human life path, one not as connected to magic as other witches she’s met, and feels a tad embarrassed bc of it, but it’s what she feels most comfortable with

loves horror movies and halloween, is That bitch who laughs at the former and goes all out with the latter

thinks virginia woolf is a legend and is Right in doing so SGKDJFGD

idk what else to add so let’s end it here !

forgot to mention that i don’t have her plots page finished, so i’ll link it when i do !

[breakingjen]

gonna talk a little bit about my spotty blogging in the past month or so while i have the energy to write it down. or more like one of the reasons why and it might get long so you’ll find it under the cut.

so as most of you know i have bipolar disorder as well as anxiety and other things. i was diagnosed with depression in march 2012 and that diagnose stayed until they rediagnosed me with bipolar in 2015 and put me on lithium which after about a year actually started helping and earlier this year i felt better than i’ve done since before i got sick. during the majority of this time i was put on sick leave (with sickness benefit) and twice i tried going back to the job market but failed both times. that is until october last year when instead of sick leave i was entered into vocational rehabilitation (that i call work) at an accounting firm (doing zero accounting bc i’m not qualified for that) by the swedish public employment service and the swedish social insurance agency. the thing about this vocational rehab is that you’re not allowed to be at the same place for longer than 6 months but my person at the spes has extended it twice - first for 2 months in march and then again for 3 months in may, which means that i currently have no idea what’s gonna happen to me after august 31st. the firm wants to hire me and keep me in their office which my people at the spes and the ssia and myself also want. BUT.. i have not made it up to full time yet (if i ever will, noone knows), i’m currently only working 4h/day and unless my pay would be huge (which.. no) i wouldn’t make it on those 4h. however, the ssia have something called sickness compensation which is for those who “will probably never be able to work full time due to illness, injury or disability. ” and my ssia person has told me that i’d be eligible for it BUT (again) they have to know exactly how much i can work so i’d need to increase my work hours and prove i can’t work more than however many hours that is. which means that i basically have to increase my hours until i can’t function like a proper human being anymore (my words, not theirs) because, you see, the thing is that if i work too many hours my anxiety levels will go through the roof, chores such as cleaning/doing laundry/cooking/etc will suffer as well as will my personal hygiene (basically going back to being depressed). i don’t have any actual objection to trying to see how much work time i can handle but we’re one month away from the end of the 3 month extension and it’s summer which means people and companies are going on vacation which means that my workload has decreased and i can’t increase my work hours without the actual workload because the result will be false. so let’s say i start increasing my work hours and maybe end up making it to 6h/day without a problem, that’s 6h/day with a lessened workload so once summer/the vacation period is over and the workload goes back to normal (well, apparently we’ve gotten new clients for the services that are my department so to speak so it will actually increase (if i’m still there)) that’s untested territory and i will most likely suffer a burnout and probably end up on sick leave with sickness benefit again, and the thought of going back into depression absolutely terrifies me, i don’t want to go through that darkness again. the thing is that my mom, my therapist and even my boss understand this and both mom and my therapist agree that increasing my work hours with a decreased workload isn’t the best idea. i have nothing to say against my ssia person bc she’s not the one who makes the decision when they get my application for it (honestly, she’d probably make a decision in my favor) - that’s up to some other people who have never talked to or met me. but this compensation is apparently really difficult to get even if you tick all the right boxes. so yeah.. if i don’t get it all i’d have (possibly) is the pay i’d get from work (if they do end up hiring me) which will not cover all my bills. at present i get something called a rehabilitation allowance (which is the same amount as the sick leave only with a different name) but once i’m employed that goes away too. the allowance/benefit/compensation above are all minimal provisions. plus they’re all taxable incomes which makes the actual amount you get even less. so that’s fun. in other news, i currently feel like i’m about to  to puke.

right, so.. the stuff about the sickness compensation is something i found out during our meeting in may and since then i haven’t really been feeling like my self (sort of? it’s kinda hard to explain). and due to the stuff i just wrote down, my anxiety (that i during spring have been able to handle without my anxiety pills) has increased quite a bit so i’m back to taking anxiety meds several times a week. and last month i had some monetary issues (that were solved thanks to one of the more precious and special people in my life) that added to the anxiety (still does even tho it’s been solved). so i’ve sort of hidden myself away a bit. i have one of those coloring books for mindfulness, which i’ve been doing some coloring in, i’ve read several fanfics (all sterek) as well as several books (the later one i finished last night), listened to a lot of podcasts and hung out with my mom in the sunshine (when that’s something we’ve had here, the swedish summer is oh so fun). anyway, between work and anxiety induced tiredness (okay, the insomnia has done its part too) plus that feeling i can’t identify (i want to call it “meh”) i just can’t drum up the energy, and sometimes will, to go online. this week’s been better but also not.

one last thing sort of related to this post, i obv still have an interest in our boys and hl but it’s sort of less enthusiastic atm - maybe because of everything i’ve just told you or maybe just.. idk, i have nothing else to offer there even though i know it could be something else, even tho idk what that would be. thought i’d just put it out there.

if you read this far, thank you🙏💗

/ Jen xo

[dominavontana]

New Moon in Leo - Eclipses - #13Mantras and #kinkylove #recovery

Ok I wasted enough time looking for that one GD perfect picture that would complete this blog to my heart's content - but later...for that...I guess. This one will do tho - Durga (Maa) is a bad ass. She slays demons and upholds moral order. And rides a lion. I dig. Sometimes we are meant to not find the thing we want so we can find the thing we need. 

So here we are again, dear hearts. It's the midst of Leo season. Well, actually the very beginning - zero degrees to be exact, and for those of you who do not know that's basically the most important/powerful point that can be occupied by a season, planet, moment, etc.

Why is this significant? Well because after about 15 years of sitting at this laptop creating fabulous content but with little intent I have figured out there are really only two times I write/post - when I'm experiencing PMS or a Leo transit. Like this one, like this Leo transit, that also happens to include two complete eclipses. Praise Be. Praise Be I'm on this side of the world aka Japan and not that one aka America where the solar eclipse will literally pass over the entire country. No, I ain't trying to be that pagan about it - also another reason I ran to Japan. 

So here's what's happening - slavee has been sober nearly 9 months. The joy in my heart right now, the gratitude, the trepidation, the faith? Cannot be accurately expressed. My baby was barely 21 when I met him. In a few months he will be 30. I have watched him grow from a boy into a man, from a victim to a champion, from an addict to a human, from a friend, to my enemy and finally my husband. And I have watched myself as a Mistress, a friend and a wife do one very important thing - I have released all the codependent tendencies in my life. I am free of the need, once and for all, to please. Oh what, you thought all doms were selfish cunts? I wish, I wish that were true. It's more true that that paradigm is in reality turned on its head and good dominants are some of the most emotionally and mentally exploited folks in the scene. Yea, that. I could have continued my life, unexamined, and functioned well enough. But the trials and tribulations my husbands trauma and subsequent disease put us through gave me the painful opportunity to truly, deeply and madly look at my own self. And only after looking into the heart of the darkness was I able to find total and complete freedom from my own painful, addiction riddled past (my dad died from the disease). In short, my husband saved me from mediocrity. And to a dominant Goddess who values beauty, raw honesty and efficiency there is no greater gift.  

So continuing onward - my husband, my slave, my soulmate is alive. This was something I was not always able to take for granted. There were moments I witnessed death rapping at his door. There were moments I looked at him and said, "The disease is winning, if you want to live you must fight for your life." But he is alive, and he is sober and soon he will join me here, on the other side of the world. And besides riding his perfect cock until it is sore my first agenda is rope, rope and more rope. It has always been slavee's fantasy to experience predicament bondage. I thought I could bottom for rope but alas I was wrong, wrong, wrong. I attended a phenomenon rope dojo last month in Tokyo. I spent exactly 20 minutes in the ropes and a week later work in the middle of the night - every nerve on fire where every fiber of the rope had touched my skin. Thus I am cursed and slavee is blessed that I must relinquish any desire I might have to be inside the ropes (I kinda already knew this) and dedicate my focus to developing the skills of a badass fulltime rope top. 

So yes - Leo season. Last summer I wrote the first draft of my manuscript. That too was during a Leo season. I was alone, at the farm in West Virginia and I spent hours everyday doing it. I'm alone again, in Japan, alone for the first time in Japan. My kinky sidekick @kiarrith took a plane home last week after 5 fucking fabulous weeks together that we shared in my new life here. Now...it's just moi. A few weeks ago, the manuscript started to creep back up on me. It was like a glowing energy growing slowly on the horizon. I know it's time to dive back into her again but GD I hate looking at my own work. It. Makes. Me. Feel. So. Uncomfortable. I'm also experimenting with total sobriety and a new workout routine so all of this adulting is just...adulting. I came to Japan to get serious, and boy have I. This former wake and bake babe hasn't hit the stuff in mooonths and I've never been really good at drinking or interested in much else (too scary, something called acid? are you fucking kidding me? no thanks). But I digress...

So here I am in Japan, being all serious, loving this new life even if I must love it differently than my former one. A time, a season, for everything. I like this new season. The thrills are different. So are the people. The subtly and nuance is enough to make one paranoid - or hyper successful. Today I look again at this manuscript - for the first time since I finished it last summer. I don't have children. My message to the world is my child. It's almost time to give birth and set her loose upon the world. Because what you don't need is another tell all, salacious memoir that exploits stigma for a paycheck. But what I can give you, my people, is the lessons I've learned from it aaalll. From being queer, from being a sex worker, from being a Goddess, from being a drag queen, from being a Dominatrix, from being a preacher's daughter, from marrying my slave, from from from from...

Wisdom. That is what makes the world worth going round. Well that and love. Money and sex may MAKE the world go round sure, but hey, that's not a bad thing either.

Hugs. Kisses. Miss Vee

[spotlightsaga]

Kevin Cage of @spotlightsaga reviews... Baskets (S02E06) Marthager Airdate: February 23, 2017 @fxnetworks Ratings: 0.460 Million :: 0.22 18-49 Demo Share Score: 9/10 **********SPOILERS BELOW********** "Give me a minute, Sheila, I gotta go talk to another nut." I read a fellow reviewer talking about how 'Baskets' S1 was more emotional... I fervently disagree. It might have been funnier, maybe, but I don't even think I can give it that because S2 has just been out-fn'-standing. I've watched 'Marthager' twice now, the first time I watched alone & the second I watched while eating dinner with my partner, who subsequently literally burst into a laughing fit while eating and I ended up with chili all over me (which I think is a great euphemism for the series itself). I've done some serious cathartic emotional work through writing these reviews, S2 has been exceptionally testing. I might be laughing while watching Martha's deadpan delivery and these obscure, absurd characters live in a strangely familiar world doing familiar things in unfamiliar ways, but going back and deconstructing these episodes has helped me work through emotionally challenging & pivotal moments in my life. Saying that out loud sounds like it would be slightly unpleasant, but I love a good challenge... As I reviewed 'Fight' and drew parallels to Chip & Dale & the different points in my life I literally had tears rolling down my face, it was an intense episode and everything up to that moment had been building since the boys father's death. 'Marthager' is very different, but still very emotionally raw in its own way. Tonally, Baskets has been playing with alternate psychological and spiritual areas of growth. Chip has finally reached a point in his life where he's realized, 'this is it, I have to go for it'. For me, that moment has come in several forms over the course of my life and I've tried on many, many hats. Not until my late 20's, early 30's was I at the place in my life where I truly hit that moment, myself. I had a lot of dreams and aspirations, but I was holding myself back because I was so fucking angry that I was pushed into a narrow scope... I felt like my parents issues and insecurities stunted my spiritual growth and my professional growth as well, that they had taken out their issues with one another on me. For that and for other reasons, I was extremely self-destructive. Luckily I was always very charismatic and, unlike Chip, had people to hold it down for me in some way while I took 2 steps forward and then spiraled 38 steps back. Not until one of those people hit a massive roadblock did I decide that no matter what, I had to make a serious fucking go. I'm not talking about pipe dreams, I'm not talking about obtainable dreams... I'm talking about really starting to focus my passion in proving myself to everyone who had ever made a sacrifice for me in their lives, to show them and show myself that I was worth all the bullshit. Like I said last week, Chip may never be considered fully 'emotionally grown', but none of us as human beings can ever reach that pinnacle and it would be unfair to not acknowledge Chip's incredible growth as a human being himself. Starting where 'Fight' left off, Christine kicks out Chip & Dale and begins to renovate her house. They did some serious fucking damage, so it wasn't going to be a couple day thing. Christine heads off to stay with her mother, Esther, played by Ivy Jones. It's really good to see Christine get these important moments of closure and opportunities in her life. The stay with her mother may be covered in a tiny dog's urine but they share a touching moment when Esther gets a phone call from a friend who won some money at a casino and let's slip that Esther had already gossiped to her about Christine's 'carpet selling suitor' she met in 'Ronald Regan Library'. Christine is annoyed and embarrassed at first, a natural Christine Baskets type reaction to pretty much anything involving anything revealing or personal, but Esther shuts it down by having a moment that every mother and child should have in their adult life. Ironically I had mine with a third person who was sitting in the back of a car in a mall parking lot in Ft Lauderdale while my mother broke down why things played out the way they did, her regrets, and her grounded hopes and dreams she had for me in life. Christine had hers with a woman on speakerphone. Maybe it's easier for moms to get honest with a small audience. Who knows. Moms are secretly extremely complicated. Esther is worried that it has been 25 years since Christine's husband died and she hadn't even attempted to move on. If she had someone interested she needs to act. She proceeded to tell her about her regrets, waiting around for a man who she knew deep down was never going to change, he was a drunk and she constantly made excuses for him. She had put Christine and her siblings, as well as herself, in danger... She had stunted them and she wished she could change that. It might be too late for her, but it wasn't too late for Christine. She wasn't going to let Christine sit back and make excuses for not moving on, her children were grown men, and although they had a long way to go, they were going to be fine. It was time for Christine to do something for herself. Christine makes one last excuse... 'But he's all the way in Denver'... Her mother had an easy and absolutely perfect response, 'You mean to tell me you of all people don't have free miles?' Of course Christine Baskets had free miles saved up, this is a woman who shops at Costco religiously. Looks like Christine is going to Denver, baby. As Christine is having a long overdue moment with her mother and heading off to Mike High City, Chip is putting his life into motion. After getting kicked out and getting immediately stood up by his brother, Dale, to 'go to Hooters and get some soup', Chip heads back to the only place he knows. The place where he got his first shot of inspiration, the now defunct rodeo. After sleeping on it, it was off to the only other person in the world who gave a damn about him, Martha's house, where he elected her to be his clown manager. Chip was so ready to fucking go that he was willing to see if the clowns that were jumping out of woods and scaring children at night was a paid gig. Even tho absolutely none of this was Martha's idea, she took her duties as Chip's manger seriously... Unfortunately she sucked at it. It looked like the only jobs she could get him were ones she payed for his services herself, even hiring him to show up at a Costco function where he runs into the 'Friendly Fun Events' manager, Ginny (Karen Maruyama, who is absolutely perfect for this show). Obviously Martha had hired Chip herself and payed out of pocket because this was definitely Ginny's territory. She ends up offering him a job and firing Martha herself. Martha isn't going to go out like that, she tries to get him a job at her nephews birthday but Chip is already booked solid at a parade where she later runs into him by accident. When he hadn't answered her phone calls and ended up being a no-show she dressed up like a clown and tried to fill the role... To horrible results. This dynamic is where things get interesting with Martha & Chip, we've always known there was some sort of unspoken chemistry between the two, but Martha is a wallflower and Chip always aims way too high. Martha doesn't want to be Chips manager, she wants to be his friend (maybe more), and failing as his manager made her feel like a failure as a friend... And she had already fucked up bad by screwing his grating, competitive twin brother. I love that their showdown takes place at the parade she just happens upon. She gets out of the car, still in full on clown makeup and scares a young girl (who she refers to as 'lady') by telling her she isn't a clown, who immediately starts crying. That's when my partner spit the chili on me, so I figured I better work that in somehow. Now we've come full circle, this is the 'Almond Parade' gig and the quote I started the review with is Chip telling a woman named Sheila dressed up like an almond to hold on while he talks to Martha, 'who looks like a small child with lipstick issues'. Holy shit those zingers are so funny they make you forget that two people are sharing a very real & public, vulnerable moment. Martha is upset, she says she knows she wasn't the greatest manager but that she tried her best... She's going out on a limb here anyway, because really he steamrolled her into the manager position in the first place. This forces Chip to define their relationship, 'Look Martha, you're not a manager. You're more of a... Friend.' In the most perky tone that Martha is able to achieve in all her monotone glory she responds, 'Really?!' Chip tried to define it further but was constantly interrupted by an old car behind him in the parade with a 'bahooga' horn. He doesn't even finish, Martha is beaming, you know, in a very Martha way, 'Thanks Chip. That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.' How do you respond to that? Chip gives it a go, 'Really? That's depressing'. Chip, ever the optimist.

[comicteaparty]

December 4th-December 10th, 2019 Reader Favorites Archive

The archive for the Reader Favorites chat that occurred from December 4th, 2019 to December 10th, 2019.  The chat focused on the following question: 

What comic ended or went on indefinite hiatus that you miss?  What about that comic do you like?

AntiBunny

An old one I enjoyed was Mindmistress. It was very interesting to see the combination of futurism and superheroes. It not only looked at what superhero tropes would and would not work in reality it took those tropes and looked for a way to make them work when they seem impossible. It wasn't exactly realistic, but it was believable and consistent within its self. The comic stopped very suddenly in the middle of a story arc.

carcarchu

Pao Ge Huang Taizi - https://www.kuaikanmanhua.com/web/topic/840/ i loved the funny and lighthearted tone of this series and really wish i could know how was supposed to end

Phin (Heirs of the Veil)

My mind immediately jumps to Hannah is not a Boy's Name, which was one of the first webcomics I've ever read (that were not on the German site I was mostly reading where everything was manga inspired). Especially what Tess Stone did with typography in the comic pages was just...top notch (also one of the first comics I've seen that made used of vertical scrolling. It's pretty sad bc it ending had nothing to do with the creator, tho I'm glad Tess went on to create other really cool comics.

Q @CecilieQMT making WAYFINDERS

Oohhh seconding Hannah is not a Boy's Name. That story inspired me to no end, and then it just disappeared :8(edited)

Cronaj

For me it is almost always Grand Spirit. (https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/grand-spirit/list?title_no=6608) I fell in love with it back in 2015, and then it disappeared for 3 years until it returned unexpectedly in 2018. Aaaand then it disappeared again this past July without a word. So who knows, it could be another 3 years before they return... Or it could be forever. I mainly loved it because the idea was really something. When this comic was originally published, it was for the Webtoon sci-fi contest back in 2015 (which I didn't participate in because I didn't have a solid idea to work with). But naturally, the story is about... fairies. XD Robot fairies created by the humans with one program in mind: protect the grand spirit of nature that humans have destroyed. The main character, Wang Min, is one of these programmed fairies, but he realizes when he is injured and taken by a human to be repaired that he is a machine created by humans for their own purposes. I mean, beyond the amazing concept, I thought the whole comic was excellently done: good character designs, excellent pacing, beautiful artwork. All this things falling into place for the author. They actually got past the first round of the contest, which is pretty amazing, but they didn't go any further past that, even though I was rooting for them. And then after that... They went on their hiatus. It makes me wonder if maybe the creator wanted to make money from the comic, and once they discovered they weren't going to in the immediate future, they gave up. Very disheartening. There are plenty of other comics that I love that have either gone on indefinite hiatus or that have ended that I still think about, but Grand Spirit is the one I think about the most.

Erin Ptah (BICP 🎄 Leif & Thorn)

I still miss No Rest For The Wicked

Not to mention What Happens in Carpediem, which was on Smackjeeves, so I bet even if the artist wanted to come back they'd decide it was more trouble than it's worth.

Eightfish

It makes me sad how quickly people responded to this question ): I too know of several comics I wish would be continued. Such is the world of webcomics though. Also, you guys, stop with the descriptions. They're too good! You guys are tempting me into reading these comics but I know if I do it will only end in disappointment edit: what is that thing below this vvv(edited)

Cap’n Lee (Flowerlark Studios)

Oh gosh, where do I start? So many over the years. One that stuck with me the most was an old, old comic from the early '00s called Fallen about a fallen angel of death. The humour was so quirky and good, but it also hit the drama and emotional beats really well. It's long since vanished after going on perma-hiatus, but 10+ years later, I still miss it. Another was Off-White. The art in that one was incredibly gorgeous. I'd link the site as it's technically still 'there' but the archives are either broken or missing. And finally, one that hasn't been officially announced as dead, but probably is, is White Noise. This comic has such great writing and atmosphere. Like Fallen, it really hit all the emotional beats so well and the build-up to big reveals was always pulled off superbly. Fortunately, the website for this one is still up and functional, and you can read what there is of it here: http://whitenoisecomic.com/(edited)

Erin Ptah (BICP 🎄 Leif & Thorn)

@Eightfish: the server has levels for every user based on how active you are -- the more you post, the more you level up! There's not a whole lot to it tbh, but there's a list of ranks and what comes with them in #rules

SAWHAND

Oh shoot! I remember Fallen @Cap’n Lee (Flowerlark Studios) ! And I don't have a great memory for stuff like that, but that one really stayed with me.

mariah (rainy day dreams)

Oh man, White Noise was one of the first webcomics I ever read, but I still have never made it through the whole archive. I lost it for a few years when I switched computers and I think when I remembered it again it had gone in that hiatus. I think that made it to hard to try and reread again :(

Cap’n Lee (Flowerlark Studios)

For sure. I never start a comic that’s already on hiatus. It’s too sad to get invested in something that might never continue.

mariah (rainy day dreams)

So for me I guess my White Whale of indefinite hiatus comics is this one called Scarecrow Lullaby. It was also one of my really early first webcomics and it wasn't like, the best comic in the world but it hit a lot of the spooky but cute notes that I like in a story. There was also something about the art and character tropes that really resonated with me and my own comics I was making at the time. So I felt kind of a kindred spirit connection with the comic in some ways. I've felt that for other comics too over the years, I figure that's probably not uncommon for folks but I don't really know? But anyway, the hiatus for this one just really haunted me almost because the creator just kind of disappear. Like there wasn't any goodbye post or anything. The comment section got wild on the last page with people speculating that she had died or something. There were people saying they were real life friends confirming that the artist was dead and then others saying no, she was still alive but wasn't planning to continue. I still go check in on it every few years just to see if there's any news. I think what makes me most sad about it isn't that the story didn't finish but just that the artist vanished. Like I wish I could follow her on Twitter or Instagram and see how she's been doing the past 10 years but if she has accounts they aren't under the same name. Just a big weird mystery! https://www.theduckwebcomics.com/ScareCrow_Lullaby/

RebelVampire

The comic I miss the most is Chronicles of Oro http://www.chroniclesoforo.com/ . I really loved how languages were handled in the comic, the character designs, the interesting world, etc. It was a really great start to a good fantasy story that really just hit all the right notes with me. It's only been 2 years since the last page was posted, but its been agony. However, unlike some of the other depressing tales, the creator does occasionally pop in to give a "It's not forgotten" status update, so maybe it will return one day.

mathtans

I'm gonna show my age here. "Elf Only Inn". http://www.elfonlyinn.net/ It started as a comic about internet chatrooms in 2002. After a few years it went on hiatus and rebooted itself as a comic about an MMORPG. As if the same users were using a new medium. Brilliant. It's been on indefinite hiatus since 2008. I still get a kick out of the "Nimoy" character being mistaken for an elf.

keii4ii

I too remember the comic Fallen @Cap’n Lee (Flowerlark Studios) though I don't remember much of its humor, so not 100% sure if we're talking about the same Fallen? Is it the one where the human MC has a pet snake? I don't quite miss this comic, at least not in the sense of longing for its unlikely return. But it left an impression on me. Taught me an important lesson in writing character-driven stories. See, at the time I was chest deep in Chosen One stories and the likes, so I thought central twists had to be about what a character was. But Fallen showed me that a story could revolve around who a character is. It's such a basic lesson, and sometimes I feel dumb for not having learned it at an earlier age, but better a little late than super late!

It was a good comic, and I super appreciate what it did for the Younger Me.

Cap’n Lee (Flowerlark Studios)

@keii4ii It must be the same Fallen, because I def remember the MC having a pet snake.

keii4ii

Woo!

Cap’n Lee (Flowerlark Studios)

The humour wasn’t terribly prevalent, but I remember when it surfaced, it always made me laugh out loud. The author also left snarky and often hilarious comments under the pages.

Erin Ptah (BICP 🎄 Leif & Thorn)

Oh, man, Elf Only Inn takes me back. Such a perfect distillation of free-for-all tween chatroom roleplaying. She's a princess mermaid elf who is also a vampyre(half)!! I'd love to see someone do a sequel/homage with present-day kids. Same kinds of jokes, but it's on a Discord server with 2019-style memes.

"Not everyone uses a 1024x768 screen size, so we're shrinking the comic." #just2002things http://www.elfonlyinn.net/d/20020705.html

Kabocha

Comics I miss... So, it's not even online now, because the author pulled all mirrors and was going to redo the site back in 2012, but I really miss Picatrix. It was kind of fundamental to getting me into webcomics at all, and I became friends with the author. It was kind of an isekai sorta deal - Main character ends up in another world with magic and stuff, finds out there's a prophecy that she's gotta fulfill. Only she wasn't reincarnated or anything. But also the whole, "oh crap arranged marriage to a king?!" plot? I was kinda into it. Especially with how Az and Winnie started off hating each other.

AntiBunny

I'd forgotten about Elf Only Inn. Really takes me back to those late nights of chatting on IRC.

€heshire777

Dr. McNinja is my first thought

Q @CecilieQMT making WAYFINDERS

Did that die?

AntiBunny

Dr. McNinja finished. The creator works as a pro in comics now, but he occasionally does a short. Like "Never Enough the Wario Diaries" that he's posting on Twitter right now.

Kelsey (Kurio)

What sorts of comics does he work with nowadays?