#I uh... got emotional

[skelswritingcorner]

Patchouli's Revenge: Lavandula Spica | To Prevent A Ruined Wedding

Guess who forgot to upload this after finishing this like... a month ago. It's me. Also this is like 9 pages long in the doc I wrote this on soooo enjoy :3 (I promise that I'll try to post the 3rd chapter soon since I'm almost done writing the last chapter of this arc)

Warnings: Toxic family members, attempted assault, multiple crimes taking place, just an absolute mess of a situation

Word Count: 3.8K

A few months prior, the Skuld Church was asked to do a wedding. As it’s a service they provided, the church accepted. However, the spouses-to-be had one simple request: keep the groom’s mother away from the wedding.

The couple sat down opposite Patchouli, gentle sunlight highlighting her pink horns. Both of them seemed uneasy, especially for a couple who is soon having their wedding. Patchouli knew that one of their parents wasn’t the best, she had quite the horrid mother herself. That must be why Sister Agnes asked Patchouli to meet with the couple; she has experience with horrible parents, it might reassure them if they have a member of the church they can connect to.

The woman was one of the regular attendees of the church services. Nina Eisner, Patchouli recalls. Nina was one of the first non-clergy members she met, and was always nice to her. However, recently, she hasn’t been attending as often. Maybe the reason is why she and the groom are meeting right now.

“So,” Patchouli put her hands in a steeple, elbows on the wooden desk, “I’m Patchouli Gimle, or just Minister Patchouli. I already know Miss Eisner, she’s a regular attendee of this church. What is your name, sir?”

“I’m Roy Palla, Nina’s fiancé and soon-to-be husband… if my mother tries not to traumatize her again.” The brunet gentleman nodded, looking at Nina in reassurance.

Patchouli tilted her head, “Is it alright for me to inquire why your mother would try to traumatize Miss Eisner? Some kind of grudge, or an assumption that she’s being replaced?”

“She doesn’t like my fianceé,” the man explained, “She’s been harassing her on social media too, it got so bad that she had to private her accounts. My mom genuinely believes that she’s trying to steal me away from her, which isn’t true. I think she has some mental problems that haven’t been addressed.”

Patchouli pursed her lips, looking at Nina. “Can you confirm this, ma’am?” She wanted the bride-to-be’s opinion as well, not just relying on Roy’s words alone. Even if it’s a fact, there should always be a second confirmation.

Nina nodded, “I’ve barely left our home in weeks because of her harassment. I thank the gods that she doesn’t know where we live, if she did she might drive to us and start breaking windows. I want to have a good relationship with her like I do with Roy’s father, but I wonder if she has some sort of mental disorder like early onset dementia or something.”

The words out of her mouth concerned Patchouli. She thought her own mom was crazy, it’s why she ran away, but the things said by the lady raised concerns for her own safety.

“Miss Nina, I am very concerned. How long has this been going on? Have you gotten a restraining order on her, or some kind of court order? I think you might need to get all the evidence you have of her harassing you if this ends up going to court.” Patchouli furrowed her brow, looking at the two.

Nina and Roy shook their heads. “I don’t think it’ll be enough, so far she hasn’t tried anything other than the online harassment.” Roy explained.

“I’d bring it up to the police just in case. Print out the screenshots with timestamps, try to get recordings of any phone calls, and have other people around you provide testimonies. I’ll contact them as well, see if they can send a few officers over in case she tries to enter the wedding without permission. I’ll help as well, there’s a few other members of this church who can officiate the marriage.” Patchouli offered, extending a hand to them.

“You would?” Nina asked, “But how would you be able to do that?”

Patchouli giggled, covering her mouth and winking, “Don’t worry about that, the Eyes of Gimle have sight all around this church.”

Nina nodded, “Ah, I see. I trust that you will take care of this. Do you trust her with keeping an eye out for your mother, Roy?”

Roy nodded in approval, “If Minister Patchouli says so and the clergy approves, then I’m fine with it. ”

“Great!” Patchouli softly clapped her hands together, “I’ll see you two in four months the day of, unless you wish to talk to us again about the wedding. Her name is Amelia Palla, correct? I’ll keep note on anyone named that.”

The couple nodded, getting up from their chairs and walking out the door. Patchouli followed them to their car, making sure that they weren’t going to be jumped, then reentered the church.

According to the couple, they wanted to do a small wedding of roughly twenty people. The groom’s father was invited, but due to the behavior of the groom’s mother, she isn’t. Roughly seven of the attendees are the children of their friends and relatives. Two of those children are in their late teens, so they might not be as startled if the groom’s mother storms into the room the wedding takes place in. The rest of them are tweens and elementary school aged, so they might not take it as well. The church will need to be on guard.

Once Patchouli returned to the office, she took out her journal and her pen to write stuff down. The journal had a leather cover, but that only hid that it was actually a spiral notebook that had some flower designs and a heavy paper weight that took fountain pen ink well. Patchouli wrote several things down.

Things to do for Roy Palla and Nina Eisner’s Wedding

1. Identify all potential entrances and exits the groom’s mother might use to enter the church.

2. Inform Skuld Police Department about the groom’s mother, Amelia Palla. Ask if they can have an officer or two stationed at the church during the wedding’s duration.

3. Figure out how many Eyes of Gimle I can have at once without any showing up on my face.

4. Check for any suspicious people who match Amelia Palla’s physical description.

Once Patchouli wrote everything down, she got up from her chair and stretched. She’s gonna be in for a few long months, but if everything goes smoothly there should be no problems at all with the wedding. For now, it’s four months of waiting and one day of anticipation.

●●●

Today is the day of the wedding. Four months prior, the spouses-to-be mentioned that the groom’s mother might try to crash the wedding and harass the bride, and the church acquired the resources to help prevent that from happening. A few members of the clergy stationed themselves by potential entrances and exits that she might try to use, and there were several officers on the scene in case she actually tried to crash it. Apparently, one of the attendees of the wedding was a cop in the same division. He was one of the groomsmen, and was given the duty of guarding the part of the church the wedding was being held in.

“Are you sure that everything will be okay?” Roy asked, looking around the venue nervously.

Patchouli nodded, “We’ll be alright! All members of the clergy know some form of magic and verbal judo, so we can stall your mother juuuust enough for the police to arrest her if she enters the church.”

Clasping his hands on his chest, Roy nodded vigirously, “Thank you. From the bottom of Nina and I’s hearts, thank you for doing so much for us. I don’t know if we’ll ever be able to repay you for your kindness.”

Patchouli shook her head and waved her hands, “No no no no, no need to thank us! The best you can do to repay us is to make a donation to the church, no matter how small. This is you and Nina’s special day. Besides, the god Gimle does all she can to make sure these ceremonies aren’t ruined, even if it results in spilled blood.” She muttered the last part to herself before turning around. “I’ll keep my eyes out for her! Just relax. If you’re still anxious, think of how your wife will look during the ceremony. You might cry, but there’s a reason we got tissue boxes by the podium.”

Patchouli exited through the grand doors, walking toward the west hall where she was stationed. Was it likely for the mother-in-law to enter through the wing that leads to the annex that the clergy lives? Unfortunately, it’s possible. Sister Helga wanted to take part, but her pain has been getting worse over the years. She now uses a rollator, and all of the younger clergy members insisted that Sister Helga worry about the wedding ceremony. Because of that, she will be the officiant.

She remembers that Sister Helga wanted to have Patchouli do the ceremony. It would’ve been the fifth wedding she officiated herself, but Patchouli, with the powers she has, knew that it made more sense for her to be on the lookout for the groom’s mother given the situation at hand.

Who is that little girl walking around the hallway? Why isn’t she in the venue?

“What are you doing out here, little miss?” Patchouli asked, “The wedding isn’t happening in this hall, it’s somewhere else.”

The little girl looked up at Patchouli, tilting her head. She had blonde hair and brown eyes with an olive skin tone. She answered, “My mom’s using the bathroom, and I wanted a place to walk back and forth.” Ah, so she just needed a place to move around.

She nodded, “I see. Well, when your mom’s done, make sure you get back to the venue. We have a few fidget toys that are quiet if you need to do something with your hands.”

The little girl shook her head, “My big bro gave me a cube thingy. He’s not here though, he’s at work. Do you know him? I think you’re his age, you must’ve gone to school with him. His name’s Fennel, like the plant.”

“Fennel? I haven’t met someone with that name,” Patchouli shook her head, “I did school things here before going to the local high school for my last two years of high school so I could get a diploma. I graduated two years back, actually. How old is your brother?”

The girl closed her eyes, humming a bit before speaking, “No, Fennel graduated four years ago. I don’t think you met him.”

Patchouli nodded before noticing an older woman approaching. “Oh, that must be your mother walking up. Hopefully you have a good time.”

The little girl nodded, waiting for her mother to catch up and walking with her to the main hall. She never caught the girl’s name, but that’s alright with Patchouli. She has a duty to do, and the wedding begins soon. Can’t let that be ruined now, right?

Patchouli walked up and down the hall, using her abilities to check blind spots and other parts of the church while observing for anything out of place. It was relatively quiet, though, with only the echoes of her footsteps being heard.

Until someone opened the door leading to the annex. She was in a frilly white dress, but Patchouli knew that she wasn’t the bride. The bride looks way different. So she’s actually trying to crash the wedding? Such strange people with their strange egos. This must be Amelia Palla, the groom’s mother.

Patchouli walked towards the lady, clad in what is blatantly a wedding dress despite not being the bride, “Showing up to someone else’s wedding in a wedding dress? How disgraceful, an insult to the ritual.” With a flick of her wrist, eyes opened up on the floor and ceiling, summoning chains which kept the woman in place.

“HOW DARE YOU DO THIS TO ME!” Amelia screeched, “I AM ROY’S MOTHER, I HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO BE AT OUR WEDDING! THAT MONSTER OF HIS GIRLFRIEND DOESN’T DESERVE HIM!”

Patchouli rolled her eyes, tapping the sides of her temple. “Your son doesn’t want you there. Why do you think your ex-husband was invited and you were not? You’ve been harassing him and his now wife constantly. Nina’s been fearing for her life, and Roy has been anxious about you possibly showing up at their house.”

Amelia tried to move against the chains, “TELL ME! TELL ME WHERE THEY LIVE! I WON’T HESITATE TO BRING MY SON BACK TO WHERE HE BELONGS!”

“And that’s why you never got told where they live.” Patchouli rebutted, “You’re controlling your son like he’s an object and not a person with their own thoughts, so he went no contact. He still cares for you, but what you need isn’t your son, you need professional help. There’s plenty of services that can help you, Mrs. Palla. You can have a relationship with your son, but you need to get your act together.”

“I need NO such help! You must be a demon sent to prevent me from seeing him. A DEMON! I rebuke your words. LEAVE!” Amelia kept screeching. This is going nowhere.

Unbenownst to Patchouli, someone witnessed what she did. The figure slinked away before anyone else could notice them.

Footsteps arrived, and a navy-clad officer strolled up to where the two women were, “Alright, wrap it up, ma’am. Amelia Palla, you are under arrest for tresspassing, harassment, and attempted assault.”

Amelia screeched, further trying to release herself from the chains. “YOU ARE NOT ARRESTING ME!” she screeched, “I AM WITHIN MY RIGHTS! BRING ME TO MY SON, I AM SAVING HIM FROM THAT DEVIL!”

The officer sighed, radioing for backup. “Suspect has been located in the west hall, near the patchouli painting. Suspect is beligerent and hostile.”

Even more screeching ensued, as the woman freed herself from the chains and tried to lunge at Patchouli. With a knife. A sharp blade that grazed Patchouli’s cheek as she stepped out of the way.

Black blood seeped from the wound, as Patchouli’s face warped into fury. Her pink eyes began glowing, and eyes began appearing all around the area.

“Assaulting a minister with a knife? How rude of you.” Patchouli stared at the woman, who went to try and stab her again.

Stepping away once again, Patchouli allowed the officer to tackle the woman onto the floor, quickly cuffing her.

He turned on the radio again, “Suspect has a weapon. I repeat, suspect has a weapon! She attempted to stab a member of the clergy!”

Several more officers ran up to the three, stopping as they reached them. One confiscated the knife after putting on some gloves, placing it in an evidence bag.

One of the officers walked up to Patchouli, noticing the blood dribbling off her cheek. “Do you need medical assistance, Miss Gimle?”

Patchouli shook her hands, “Not at all! I’ll just clean the wound once I go to the restroom.”

The officer nodded, writing something down on a note pad, “Understandable. Once the ceremony happens, I’ll ask the people attending to give some testimonies. Go wash the wound, I’ll go into the main hall.”

Patchouli gave the officer a small salute, zooming to the restroom to wash the blood off her face. When she reached it, she grabbed a paper towel and soaked it in water. She used that to wipe the cut, black blood staining the wet paper. The blood began coagulating, given the superficial nature of the wound. If that madwoman cut any deeper, she’d have to visit the hospital to get stitches.

Once Patchouli finished cleaning the cut, she washed and dried her hands before returning to the main hall. It was rather tense in the hall, but that made sense. Someone tresspassed onto the church while a wedding was starting, and now people might start pointing fingers at each other to find out who told the groom’s mother where and when the wedding was taking place.

Fortunately, nobody was starting a conflict. Maybe it was the cops being in the building, but it was rather peaceful. The wedding can go on as intended. Patchouli walked up to the groom by the podium, whispering something in his ear before taking her place behind Sister Helga. It took some time for everyone to get settled down, especially the younger attendees, but soon it was time for the wedding ceremony to begin.

The little girl that Patchouli saw just before Amelia tried to stab her tossed paper flower petals on the aisle, shaking her hand from side-to-side to allow the petals to distribute on the carpet as controlled as her little hands are capable. The petals were yellow with bits of orange and pink, like a sunset within the horizon. When the flower girl finished up near the podium, she sneaked off to the side in wait.

Soon, the doors opened, and Nina ascended up to the podium. Her dress wasn’t extravagant by any means, just a simple coral empire dress that Patchouli remembers her wearing before, but the accessories made all the difference. She had a deep pink corset belt, and a small amethyst pendant that Patchouli recalled Nina wearing four months back. Her hair was tied up in a bun, with a pink rose upon a golden hairpin keeping her tight curls in style. She didn’t wear a full veil, but the two accessories with added yellow tulle created the illusion of one.

Roy looked to be holding back tears. Sister Helga grabbed a tissue from the inside part of the podium, handing it over to Roy. He wiped his eyes and blew his nose before putting it away in the trash bin next to the podium. As Nina walked up to face her soon-to-be husband, both of them smiled.

Sister Helga began her speech, “We are gathered here today to celebrate the bond between Nina Eisner and Roy Palla. Now, I know today got off to a rough start. Someone almost crashed the wedding, and unless we’re gonna be surrounded by puppies and kittens we don’t want that happening, now do we?”

A few chuckles came from the attendees, and from the couple themselves. Sister Helga always knew how to lighten up the mood when need be. Take it from Patchouli, she knows that such ways come with skill. A skill Patchouli admires.

“But now, we are here to honor the marital bond between these two under the watchful gaze of Gimle, god of bonds and sight. Her spirit is within us as so is her power, and in this ceremony we honor her domain as she blesses this marriage between these two as equals.” Sister Helga raised up her arms, palms facing the stained glass fixture above the podium. The stained glass was of the patchouli flower, one of Gimle’s symbols.

Sister Helga lowered her arms, gesturing to the couple, “Now, which one of you wishes to go first in your vows?”

Roy grabbed a piece of paper from his front pocket, unfolding it. Taking a deep breath, he spoke the words he wrote, “When I first met you, I never thought I’d be marrying you one day. All good romances begin with a good friendship, and by the gods you’ve been one good friend of mine. Despite everything, you’ve stayed strong. Even as my mom tried to stop you, you didn’t. I can’t wait to spend so much time with you, Nina. We’ll raise as many cats together as you wish. I…” Roy choked on his words, tears beginning to flow, “I love you so much that this room isn’t enough to contain it. I care about you to infinity, and I can’t wait to be a part of yours for as long as you wish.”

Sister Helga grabbed the box of tissues once again, but Nina grabbed a tissue to wipe Roy’s face before throwing it away.

“I feel the same way as you. I never thought that you were someone I’d end up loving so deeply. Even as your mother tried to break us apart, you refused to let her. You helped me by providing a safe space, a shoulder to cry on, and encouraged me to ask the clergy to help us with her. I know it must be hard for you, but hopefully one day… one day we shall have our families bond together. You’ve been an awesome uncle to my nieces and nephews, and I know that if we have a kid you will be one cool dad. But for now, we can take care of a kitty or two.” Nina recited her vows, looking at Roy with nothing but love within her eyes.

Sister Helga nodded, as a young man around Patchouli’s age walked up with two gold bands upon the purple cushion the church provides for all weddings. His blond hair was pushed back in a braid, with a matching sunset-themed dress shirt and pants. He offered the cushion to the couple, who took the wedding bands and placed them upon each other.

Once the young man walked toward the flower girl, likely his little sister, Sister Helga continued her speech.

“And now, with vows recited and bands exchanged,” she extended her hands forward, taking in a breath, “I now declare both of you married under the watchful gaze of Gimle.”

Nina and Roy tackled each other in a hug, and the room erupted into applause. Attendees from both halves got up to clap, and began talking to one another. Patchouli walked up to the couple, who rushed up to her.

Roy bowed at her, with Nina giving her a gentle hug. “Thank you, Minister, for helping us. I know my mom cut you with a knife, are you okay?” Roy asked.

Patchouli nodded, “Don’t worry about me, sir! I’m just glad that the wedding went on without much problem! My kind is well known for our regenerative capabilities, and us clergy know some minor healing magic. Wouldn’t want to stain the church with blood, wouldn’t I?”

Nina shook her head, “Still though, we thank you from the bottom of our souls. I remember when I first met you that you were scared of newcomers. You’ve grown so much over the past decade, we couldn’t be more proud of you.”

It’s truly been that long since she arrived? The years felt like they’ve flown by for Patchouli, so much so that she forgot how much she grew. Growing past the trauma of her old home, growing to learn to love journaling again, and growing to care for those around her deeply.

Now that Patchouli thinks about it, how is her older sister? Primrose promised to try and reunite with her again one day, and it’s been ten years since then. Should she start trying to find her sister again? It would be difficult to find a starting point, it won’t be easy. Maybe Patchouli should get a social media account or two, even if it’s just to lurk.

For now though, the wedding went on without much issue. Once the attendees clear the church, she plans on helping to clean up the main hall and putting everything away. Until then, she can socialize with the people as much as she wants or as little as she wants.

[ilions-end]

i've read several papers recently that try to concisely translate the potential meanings of odysseus' name (Man-of-Pain, Trouble, Hateman, Anger-Bringer, Suffering) but the one that still haunts me is Mr. Hater

[deoidesign]

Random update sorry everything is taking so long. I've paused Patreon and I'm working on various things, but some people have started to express concern for my safety/living status so just letting you know I am alive!

[lepakonpaska]

limited color palette studies in my sketchbook ft. my dearest darlings

[buwheal]

OH!!!!! HAVE YOU CHECKED THE CYBER CAFÉ DUMPSTER by any chance? there HAS to be some leftover cake there!!!! i heard there was an event recently!!

[the-crooked-library]

The intimacy is important to show the contrast between Thomas and Orlok in the movie. Thomas repeatedly fails throughout the movie. He fails communication and understanding test with Ellen, he fails self-imposed masculinity test in general, he fails sex and intimacy test with Ellen. He even fails fully acceptance and full love test with Ellen because till the end he expects that Ellen can be somehow cured from her powers, and killing Orlok should do the trick, meaning he’s incapable of just accept her fully the way she’s without trying to correct it. The part that Ellen was happy for awhile with Thomas because for that time her powers were blocked is a big giveaway, that it’s already in fact wasn’t working between them from the start because if she could only be happy with him while suppressing huge part of herself, then such foundation was bound to crumble. Orlok meanwhile fulfilled the crucial basics for Ellen - understanding and acceptance of her nature and powers in full, intimacy and sexual realisation the way Ellen wished and imagined.

yessss exactly - as much as I do like Thomas as a character, and as much as he might care for Ellen, he's not a good fit for her, and she knows this!.. She wants, desperately, the sort of emotional connection that he will never be able to give without first unpacking the prejudices and insecurities that instruct his entire life and his opinion of her; and while that is not impossible, it is still quite unrealistic, given his background and societal context.

The reason Orlok is able to think outside those bounds, despite also being a man from an even older society, is because he exists in opposition to its restrictions. His attitudes are not reflective of whatever people around him would've thought of women or queerness or neurodivergence when he was alive; they are, however, directly informed by his making "covenant with the devil." Unlike the proper, god-fearing, Rational people that dictate Ellen's daily life, he accepts and desires every aspect of her that is considered "sinful" - her sexuality, her lack of deference, her eccentricities; and it is this fundamental understanding that she craves.

TL;DR -

"you could never satisfy me the way he does" was about emotional connection, not sex - and, of course, Thomas went straight ahead and proved her right

a relationship that is blocking her powers and allows her to be "happy" as long as she acts normal and hides her real self is not a good relationship. regardless of how one may interpret her connection with Orlok, Ellen's marriage to Thomas is an allegory for being in the closet/masking - and I personally think she deserves better

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

I'm gonna be real with you I align more with grunge and emo than I do with punk like it's all about creativity and personal expression outside of the societal norm (thus the umbrella term "alternative") but for me it's less creativity and expression as a form of rebellion, more of creativity and expression as necessary for survival

[madbard]

Putting this in your askbox cuz I know you're also an Epic the Musical fan but yknow I think if Loop saw that musical they'd get very emotional about Would You Fall In Love With Me Again, just in the context of thinking of their old party... :'>

Oh, a thousand times, yes.

I’ve been thinking about Epic and ISAT a lot recently, and honestly I think the entire musical would be such an intense experience for the entire party, but especially Siffrin and Loop. After all, Epic is, at its core, the story of someone who loses himself while desperately trying to return home.

(I know you were talking about ‘Would You Fall In Love With Me Again’ specifically, but this is about to get really out of hand. Also, I’m going to frame Epic as a musical that Loop, Siffrin and the post-canon party (likely sans Bonnie considering some of the subject material) are watching.)

Starting off with the Troy Saga, we have some striking similarities between Odysseus and Loop and Sif already - we know he’s been away from his home island for years, and so badly wants to see his family again. The homesickness here would resonate with them, I think, but the situation is also very different since Odysseus has such strong memories of his home and his family, and his home still very much exists. So that creates a little bit of distance as they are watching. ‘Open Arms’ would probably hit pretty hard though - I could see Polites’ encouragements reminding them of the party trying to help them after the loops. (Note for ‘Warrior of the Mind’ - I think this song would start some of the party off on the wrong foot with Athena. I think Mirabelle and Isabeau at least would be put off by the line “I see you changing from how I’ve designed you” as a bad thing. Here we have this character trying to change for the better, and another character is telling him that that’s a bad thing and he should stay the same? Yeah, they might not be the biggest Athena fans at this point.)

But then… oh, the Cyclops Saga is going to be uh… interesting. I wonder when any members of the party might have encountered a giant… led a fight against said giant… tried to barter with the giant to find a nonviolent solution for everyone… thought for a moment that they had succeeded… realized they had failed in a terrifying moment when they were told they would be the final one to die… witnessed helplessly as that giant brutally crushed one of the people they love most in the world as that person called out their name in agony… (The first time I listened to Epic after finishing Act 3 I had to pause it for a minute because I kept visualizing Bonnie during ‘Survive’ and it was doing psychic damage.) As much as I like to imagine the party watching Epic, I can’t imagine Siffrin watching that scene without having a panic attack. After that I doubt they are finishing the musical. (Now, we do have a fair bit to go and fascinating songs to think about so for the sake of this post maybe they were somehow all distracted during that scene? I don’t know, for whatever reason they keep watching.) If the party didn’t like Athena before, they definitely don’t like her after she abandons Odysseus - though I could see Odile giving her a little more grace in that regard, as she might see a bit of herself in Athena’s intelligence, the age difference between her and Odysseus and her clear difficulties with friendship and emotions.

The Ocean Saga is called than the Cyclops Saga. I could see Siffrin and Loop exchanging some looks at the “you rely on wit and people die on it” line but while there are some parallels between that song and their own discussion post Act 3, the similarities are ultimately far outweighed by the differences. Then we have the ultimate paranoia/insomnia/exhaustion/homesickness anthem in ‘Keep Your Friends Close,’ which I could see Siffrin and Loop getting pretty invested in.

As much as I love the Circe Saga, I’m not sure the party is getting much from it aside from enjoying the story and music.

Then we have the Underworld Saga and STARS. Loop is NOT going to be handling this well. ‘The Underworld’ is an absolute nightmare - gotta love being haunted by the screams of your friends that you couldn’t protect, tee-hee! Odysseus’ mom dying while waiting for him to come home is also an intense scene considering how little Loop and Siffrin know about what might’ve happened to their own parents when the island disappeared, but that scene is also just generally heartbreaking. ‘No Longer You’ is where things become viscerally painful for Loop - after all, there is a reason there are at least two full length Loop-centric animatics of that song. I want to ramble about this one but… “we’ve suffered and sailed through the toughest of hells, now you tell us our effort’s for nothing” and “I see a man who gets to make it home alive, but it’s no longer you” speak for themselves. The universe doesn’t care how much you suffered - someone is going to get that happy ending that you fought and died and bled for, but it’s not you. Not anymore. Then we reach ‘Monster’ and Odysseus has reached a state of self-loathing and dehumanization that Siffrin and Loop are far too familiar with. The death of diplomacy in exchange for brutality matches with post-Act 3 Siffrin, but it also aligns with Loop, and their willingness to do whatever it takes to help Siffrin escape the loops, even if that means sacrificing the party. And of course the perceived loss of humanity is very applicable to Loop, always.

On to the Thunder Saga, and Odysseus’ rage in ‘Different Beast’ is his own personal Memory of Sadnesses moment. This saga is just… tough to listen to for the entire party I think. The way Odysseus and Eurylochus’ friendship falls apart - that still hurts so much every time I listen and I’m sure it would be painful for them as well. (I could probably elaborate more but this post is already far longer than I had expected and I’m starting to run out of steam so I’ll leave it here.)

The party has made it to the Wisdom Saga! Odd opinion incoming, but I think ‘Legendary’ would resonate with Isabeau a lot - a song about this young, less-than-intimidating guy who desperately wants to be bigger, braver, stronger, the kind of person that can protect the people he cares about. Also, I could see Telemachus activating some protective instincts in the party, considering how some of his eagerness and fighting attitude are mirrored in Bonnie as well. ‘Little Wolf’ and ‘We’ll Be Fine’ would cause a massive shift in Mirabelle and Isabeau’s opinion of Athena - the character who opposed change at the beginning has changed for the better! Athena’s regret in ‘We’ll Be Fine’ would also hit really close to home for Odile, I think - “maybe if I’d made a different call, maybe if I hadn’t missed it all, maybe he’d be fine” aligns so painfully well with her own guilt and regret for not being able to figure out the loops and help Siffrin sooner. I think ‘Love In Paradise’ would be a surprisingly tough listen for Loop and Siffrin. The context is so different, but this song contains lyrics like “under my spell we’re stuck in paradise, no one can come or go - not til the end of time, there is no way, you’re mine, all mine.” Calypso is so scared of being alone that she traps Odysseus on the island with her for years - meanwhile, Odysseus is slowly broken down by his grief and his desperation to go home. For Loop and Siffrin, there’s an uncomfortable understanding of both characters, I think. (The entire party loves Athena after ‘God Games,’ I don’t make the rules.)

Next up, Vengeance Saga. This is where things start to get intense. As one might guess from the fact that I made a Loop-centric lyric comic for ‘Not Sorry For Loving You,’ I think they would relate to this song on a visceral level. “Someone came by today, they said they’re taking you away, that you’re not mine to save, and sooner I won’t get to see your face” - this so perfectly fits with Loop’s realizing Siffrin won their happy ending and is going to be leaving Dormont with THEIR family. Not theirs to save. Not anymore. “I spent my whole life here, was cast away when I was young, alone for a hundred years, I had no friends but the sky and sun” - this is literally an exaggerated description of their own life, washing up on the shore of Vaugarde as a teenager, completely alone with no memory of ever having been known or loved. “So when you washed ashore, I thought for sure that you were my dream come true - I thought I knew” - Loop/Siffrin being so desperately lonely when they met the party and bonding with them so deeply and desperately, starved for love and connection to the point where they clung TOO hard, loved TOO defensively. And then we reach the final lines of the song and I honestly think the comic explains better than I could exactly how perfect those lyrics are for Loop. At the end of this song, Calypso is left sobbing on a beach, watching as Odysseus sails into a future without her in it, with people that love him, so desperately lonely and full of the knowledge that nobody will ever, ever love her again. Yeah… I think this song might mess with Loop a bit. And then, of course, we have ‘Six Hundred Strike.’ This is another song that I imagine Siffrin for - specifically Act 5 Siffrin fighting the King. “How does it feel to be helpless? How does it feel to know pain? I watched my friends die in horror - watching as they were all slain!” Honestly, this song is a big Act 5 moment for Odysseus - except that he actually defeats Poseidon. I can’t imagine that this song wouldn’t cause at least a shudder in Siffrin and Loop.

And now, finally, the Ithaca Saga. (Which is what you were actually talking about. This got extremely out of hand.) I’ve mentioned the party would feel protective of Telemachus. They are not handling ‘Hold Them Down’ well. ‘Odysseus’ is interesting to think about actually, because for whatever reason this has become such an Act 5 Isabeau loops AU song to me. I imagine that an Isabeau loops AU would involve him undergoing a change that mirrors Odysseus a lot, becoming steadily colder rather than becoming manic like Siffrin does. I think he’d cope with the loops by essentially shutting down his emotions, using his intellect to be a truly terrifying force in combat. Under it all though I think there’d still be a core protective rage - “my mercy has long since drowned” vibes. He’s going to protect his family, even if it means becoming a monster. Alright, AU talk aside, the fact that the suitors literally refer to Telemachus as “the kid” in this song (as they’re planning to maim him to control Odysseus) is going to mess with Loop and Siffrin at least a little bit. Moving onto ‘I Can’t Help But Wonder,’ for whatever reason this song makes me think of Bonnie and Nille. I actually have a half-sketched lyric comic with this song set to their reunion, but only time will tell if I ever actually get around to finishing it.

Alright. We’ve made to the song this ask was actually talking about.

‘Would You Fall In Love With Me Again’ is a beautifully painful song to think about in connection with Loop because it is such a cruel inversion of what actually happens. Odysseus returns home, changed and certain Penelope won’t love him anymore, convinced that when she looks at him she will see a monster. But when she sees him again, she sees her husband. She sees him, she recognizes him, she tells him she still loves him, that he is still the same person, that she will fall in love with him over and over. She tells him everything Loop wishes they could hear from their own party. In reality, the party didn’t recognize Loop, because they aren’t the same person anymore. In canon, Loop never gets the confirmation that the party loves them still. They know the party is grateful, but that’s only because they were able to help them find Siffrin. Siffrin thought the party loved him after he helped each of them during the friend quests, and it’s only after Act 5 that they realize that the party loved them already, and will continue to love them even if they mess up. Loop never gets that confirmation. As they fade back into the Universe, they do so knowing the party will not grieve them.

Part of my love for post-canon Loop content stems from my desire to see Loop asking, in their own way, without even realizing it, if the party would fall in love with them again.

The answer is yes. No matter how long it’s been, and how much Loop has changed, I believe that the answer is yes.

[qrevo]

Emotional Support Polar Bear 🐻‍❄️✨

(Whenever you're feeling sad he will cheer you up with bear puns - he just can't BEAR to see you down!!)

[birb--birb]

Yall. I did it. I finished my first veilguard run. And I've been crying for the last hour DJFHKQLSLS

[jackass-jones]

Come back home when you have some sense

You can throw your life away just not at my expense

You’re not the son I raised

[ferahntics]

Nana's 1st birthday...

[imtrashraccoon]

Remembering the lord nightmare ask i sent you

This is what I meant by "stares disrespectfully" :

I am... very thirsty for evil men.

Ah, I figured it was something like this. I miss writing him so here's a little something... (⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴗ⁠ꈍ⁠)

He stares down at you from his throne with an expression of disgust. Like always, he's wearing the finest of clothing, although he seems to have chosen a more comfortable outfit today but his black cloak keeps it mostly hidden. The tips of his tendrils flick restlessly, much like a cat's tail, and you notice how he clenches his fists against the armrests.

"Stop looking at me like that," he growls in a low voice. "It's pathetic."

He seems to grow uncomfortable the longer you continue to stare at him. He adverts his gaze from your own but occasionally glances back to see if you're still doing it. After shifting in his seat a bit, he lets out a heavy sigh.

"I know what you want but it's pointless. You'd do better with anyone else..." He grimaces but still refuses to look directly at you again. "I hear my brother adores mortals like you, so why don't you go bother him instead?"

[piko-rose]

Sometimes I think about how Sonic felt bad about how he thought he used to act around Amy when they were younger.

Sometimes I think about how Sonic wanted to talk to Amy about how he was feeling.

How just because he doesn't feel the same, it doesn't mean he hates her. He never hated her.

But then... he found out what she's been through. Why she was so quiet as of late.

That she kept all of her feelings from him. Her childhood. Her trauma. The possibility that she might've done something really bad to herself during the war since it was so stressful to her.

He might've believed that he was the reason she felt this way. He might've hurt her.

He didn't, but he doesn't know that.

He didn't even know what she'd been through... he felt even terrible.

She believed that her love to him don't matter and tried to move on, but the choice didn't make her feel happy.

...It didn't make him feel happy either.

Maybe they would hug and never let go. Maybe they would overlap each other's apologies for giving each other a rough time.

Maybe they would cry. Maybe they would admit that they love each other out loud.

Amy would admit that she still loves him, for the first time in forever.

Sonic would admit that he loves her too, as a friend.

Meanwhile in his heart, he wouldn't mind being something more. He wouldn't mind being in a relationship with her or anyone. (Shadow lol) He knows that it doesn't cost you your freedom, it only allows you to let someone catch up with you. She wanted to be free with him.

That kind of stuff doesn't bother him anymore, but for now, he just needed to be there for Amy. He needed to be her friend.

Sometimes I think about how Sonic and Amy's friendship would rekindle in a deep, emotional way.

Sometimes I think about how this moment could be the start of a slow burn kind of relationship between Sonic and Amy as time goes on and as they get older.

Sometimes, I think about this too much, and I cry like a baby LMAO-

had to edit this post to fix the link because for some reason it wasn't working??

[shirogane-oushirou]

yayyyy doodled something for the renniversary!!

[windupaidoneus]

hildecember 31. maybe not the best but its for me