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dre6ming · 2 years

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The delicate beginning rush

Chapter VI ~ my darling

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Chapter V ~ torn

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Pairing: Austin Butler x fem singer/actress reader

Warning: age gap, mentions of poor mental health, depression, anxiety, mentions of abuse, talks of toxic relationships, divorce, fluff, angst, cursing. That’s all I hope :))

Plot: after a horrible article makes the headlines you find yourself back in a place where you judge your every move. Your crush on Austin only seems to grow as does your liking towards Joshua.

Word count: ~6500

Disclaimer: everything I write is fake. Except for the songs I mention.

I see it as soon as I wake up. The bad habit of waking up and checking my phone, giving my team no time to hide this from me. I stare at the screen of my phone with blurry eyes, the big red letters screaming at me.

"19 and taking hearts left and right"

The title reads and I could lie and say it's unexpected for a piece like this to be written, but it's not. I knew, I always did, but I guess I never anticipated how sharp and evil their words would be. Bringing up my parents divorce, saying dating is some coping mechanism, because they left me? Pulling up those pictures of me, balling my eyes out on the street. That day being one of the worst days of my life and they had the audacity to photograph it and now use it to justify my serial dating behavior? I know this is the price I pay for the job I chose, but sometimes the price feels higher than the reward.

With shaky hands I wipe my face, or try to, then turning my phone off I get up to go in the shower. The warm water engulfs me, my tears mixing with it. Each sob that shakes my body, makes my muscles contract painfully and I struggle to wash myself, as I feel like my legs might give out at any minute. I let out a scream so loud and sharp I scare myself and fall on the shower floor, clutching my head in my hands.

I need to get out, I need to breathe, I can't breathe. I'm stuck. I need out. I need...

Gathering up my strength, I get up, turning off the shower and ignoring the pain in my knees, which are sure to have bruises on them later. Using a warm towel to dry myself and then hurriedly putting on some clothes. Comfort being my goal I choose in oversized dark blue sweat suit. Staring at the clock, it's only 7:45 am, I woke up way too early, because of all the turmoil I faced in my sleep, caught between dreaming of Austin or Joshua. I'm supposed to be going to a fitting today, for the Oscars, also Jack expects me in the studio, but I can't. I don't want to see or talk to anyone right now. So I don't. My phone is turned off, it's too early for Matt to be here, my parents don't live here and don't care, it's easy for me to avoid people, so that's what I do.

Taking my bag, I make my way out of the apartment, after feeding Simba and William, no need for them to suffer just cause I do. Putting on sunglasses and hiding my hair as best as I can in a beanie, I walk out of the building, the cold air of the early morning hitting my cheeks. Behind my glasses my salty tears are still flowing. New York is busy as ever and I'm happy for it. The crowd occupied with whatever they have going on, so no one pays any attention to me, it's comforting, but I can't hope for it to last. I like to think about myself as one of those celebes who knows exactly how to work their private life, while keeping people entertained, I don't push fans away and I usually don't mind paparazzi, but then again, I wasn't an Oscar nominee before, nor was I lunching with famous men. I'm growing with my career and I arouse more excitement now I guess.

I'm walking like a crazy person, almost running, my feet carry me unconsciously down the street. Looking down at the watch on my wrist I see it's now 8:15am if I keep at this pace I'll be at the Chanel studio in about an hour, sure I'll be all sweaty and gross, but I don't care, at least I'm showing up. Showing up is the best I can do now. I try not to think about how everyone must be freaking out right now, calling my phone. By now Matt probably got to the apartment and is frantically searching for me, scared something bad might have happened.

I sigh annoyed that I didn't think to take time and text him that I'll go to the fitting by myself. I hate worrying people, but then again that's not healthy, because I often think if the worse were to come and that dark part of my brain took over, then I'd fail all of them, but I should be thinking about failing myself. It's my life and it has very little meaning to me, all I care is to be here for the people that I know care and my therapist has been struggling to drill into my brain that I should stop thinking of others and how my life affects them, but rather about myself and how I affect myself. Easier said than done. Guess I'll have to squeeze a session in today or tomorrow morning, because I know I'm not ok and I would like to know why. Because I can't accept the fact that, that article has me twisted like this, it has to be something more as well. It's not fair for my brain to fail me like this.

Lost in the spiral of my mind, I don't even acknowledge I got to my destination, until I'm looking up at the tall glass building. When I walk in I see Levis, coming out of the elevator, talking on the phone, worried, but when his eyes meet mine he visibly relaxes, murmuring some words into the phone and ending the call. "(Y/n), what the hell? Matt was frenetic, what happened?" I roll my eyes at him and go past him, to get inside the elevator, but he grabs my arm and keeps me in place. "Sweet pea, tell me? You know you're like my daughter, what's wrong?" I only shake my head, not really willing to talk about what's got me so twisted. With a defeated sigh, he understands and let's me go. I'm silent for the elevator ride and for most part of the fitting, only making the effort to talk when really necessary.

I catch a glimpse of myself in the tall mirrors and I have to force myself not to gasp. I look so tired. If Timmy or Roxanne would see me right now they would freak out and maybe they should. Sighing I turn around and show the stylist where I want modifications to be made. The whole process goes by in a haze, I'm not really here, my body is, but my mind?.... Well definitely somewhere else.

All that keeps going through my mind is : Are they right? Am I playing? But then again I know the truth, I know Austin is just a friend and so is Joshua. Sure I wrote Austin a whole song about wishing on dandelions for his love, but he's still just a friend. Ugh god I sound crazy, maybe I am. "So what do you think?" One of the stylists asks me, but I'm unable to actually formulate an opinion, so I smile and nod. I like it, do I think it's amazing? Not really. Does it age me a decade? Yes. But I do look beautiful and professional in the dark blue plaid pants, that are so wide legged they look like a skirt and the halter top white shirt, completes the look nicely. "Yeah, you can't go wrong with a classic!" I mutter and they go on to take the measurements needed for further alterations.

Happy to be out of playing dress up, I sink into the seat of the car, burying myself in the huge sweater I have on. Matt doesn't look at me, he just greets me politely as always. I know I scared him, disappearing like that on him. I don't think anyone on the outside could really understand how much the people working around me are like family to me, so them worrying for me is beyond a professional care.

I'm feeling a bit better now, but definitely not ready to go and finish 'Dandelions', Austin's song can wait. Instead I think I'll try to bring him a song I started a while ago.

I greet Jack with a tight hug and go to sit down at the piano. "So I've been thinking, about a lot lately, all these fittings and photo shoots, they have me hyper fixing on things." Jack listens as I play the piano, "Ok, so are we talking-" "Body image" he nods, closing his eyes to listen to the soft melody I'm playing. "She just want to be, beautiful" I sing "She goes, unnoticed she knows, no limits" I sigh and keep playing struggling to keep my voice steady. "She prays to be, sculpted by the sculptor." The rhythm of the song picks up now and Jack goes over to his computer snapping his fingers to the melody, adding it over the piano. "Oh she don't see, the light that's shining. Deeper then the eyes can find it. Maybe she's blind?" I shake my head. "Maybe we have made her blind?" He suggests and I sing it that way.

"So to all the girls that's hurting, let me be your mirror, help you see a little be clearer" I write that verse down, smiling at the almost complete song, for hours now we've been throwing lines at each other. I usually write my songs alone, but this felt right to be done like this, I trust him to know exactly what I want to say. "That's beautiful, I'm thinking for the end we can have you and a choir sing and you could be saying 'No better you than the you that you are, No better life than the life we're living' , but right at the end we quiet down the music and you go with the chorus again one last time, on your own" I like that idea, putting on the headphones and going to sing into the mic.

We get most of the song done, but we have to see about that choir and we still have a lot in production to do, but I'm confident, "Scars to your beautiful" will be a song able to touch many people, not just girls, because we unfortunately live in a society where molds and labels are frequently used. I haven't always been the kindest to myself, my body, my craft, my mind. I'm my worts critic, but that's normal, my therapist says. I didn't expect this morning to go in the studio with one line that came to me in a flash and from there to build a whole song. I kind of wanted to finish "Idontwanttobeyouanymore" , but I think I'll keep that for my sessions with Finneas, it feels like a song for him, maybe I could ask Billie to feature and do vocals? I write that idea down in my journal and closing it, I discard it in my bag, occupying myself with looking out the window at the fast moving city as Matt drives me back home.

When I get to my apartment everything is the same as I left it. I hate it. I used to come back home and mom would've cooked something, or cleaned something, maybe dad had built some new furniture or he was loudly watching tv in the kitchen, or they were both on the balcony smoking. I miss them, but then I remember those were the good simple times I missed. They're divorce was long coming, just like that source for the magazine said. My parents had a toxic relationship and they used to hurt each other a lot and me as well. They were also codependent on each other, so it took a lot of pushing for my mom to finally file for divorce. My dad, a smart manipulative man, who loves me truly, but who holds no respect for my mother, had his claws deep into her and he was abusive towards her, both verbally and physically, though the latter was not as often. As you can see it's safe to assume my dad blames me for the divorce, but so does my mom. They think I'm spoiled and unrealistic, living in a fake world with an imaginary career.

I pick up my phone from where I left it on my bed and turn it on, notifications flooding my screen. I delete the unimportant ones, reply to some emails and text back a few people, leaving the best for last. I open the group chat with Timmy and Roxanne, reading over their texts, they were both going crazy over my ghosting of them. With a shaky breath I start tipping.

Me:

Sorry guys, was busy in the studio. Had an early fitting for the Oscars as well

RoxiBear🐻:

Girl you had us worried. Everything ok? I saw that garbage article.

Me:

Yeah I'm ok, I guess. I don't know.

Timmy💝:

Don't lie!

Me:

I don't know what you want to hear. None of what they said was true.

RoxiBear🐻:

I'm with Tim on this one, don't lie.

Me:

Idk what to say. Yeah I was alone w/ Austin and then w/ Joshua, but nothing happened. I don't think

Timmy💝:

You don't think?

RoxiBear🐻:

What does that mean?

Sighing I decide this is too much to be carried over text, so I FaceTime them. They both answer in an instant, Timmy seeming tired, already lying in bed and Roxanne waiting at the airport for her flight home. "So I took Austin out, to show him New York, but that was that. I'm not making moves on him" I roll my eyes at the stupid assumption. "And with Joshua, I think it was a date? He did give me this, that was true" I lift up my right hand and they gasp at the sight of the bracelet. "Definitely a date, girl and that looks so gorgeous, it's your style" Roxanne says, and Tim is quick to chime in. "Yeah I can confirm the dude likes you, he skipped flowers and went straight to the rocks." I laugh, brushing a hand through my hair. "I guess what bothered me most was them using those pictures of me and saying that I'm doing this because of the divorce, it's just. If I wanted it discussed over media I would've streamed it." They laugh a bit at that, but return to their serious demeanors. "Hon' I wish I was there to hug you!" Timmy says, sticking out his bottom lip. "I will, in a few hours, I'm taking my Uber straight to your place, so let the front desk know I'm coming." Roxanne says, before she drops her phone, making us all giggle. "Shit, gotta go, how can I be at the airport early and still get late on my flight, fuck me! Bye, love you!" She waves quickly, ending the call, leaving just me and Timmy.

His knowing eyes watch me through the screen, but I know I have to cut this short, the dark circles under both of our eyes, prove that we need more sleep. "I hate to cut this short- " he breaks to yawn and as on cue I do the same. "-but I have early call time tomorrow. I just want you to know, that I'm with you no matter who you want?" This makes the hair on the back of my neck stick up. "What?" I ask almost scared of the answer. "Sweet dumpling, yesterday when we talked you had this light in your voice, now call me crazy and tell me that I'm wrong, but I do think that hanging out with Austin did it or maybe it was the anticipation of the date with Joshua? I don't know, but sis, you sounded alive, for the first time in months. So, and I know Roxi, would agree, have your fun, turn a blind eye to all the gossip. Dating isn't bad, neither is making new friends, so whichever you decide Austin and Joshua are, I think you shouldn't overthink it." Smiling at him I dry my now damp cheeks, I don't know why I'm surprised he said these things, he's always been there and he's never judged me just like never judged him. "But I don't even know, what this is? Not Austin, not Joshua. I'm just, I don't understand. I've never-"

I can't find the right words to say, the matter is still very new and unknown to me. I think I like Austin, I mean there's definitely a lot to like, but then there are those things that should stop me, like the age gap and the girlfriend, doesn't matter that the relationship is fake, it still exists. And then there's Joshua, didn't write a song for him and I barely spoke to him, but he's sweet and does make my heart beat faster. Ugh I don't know what this is. Am I living a teenage drama show? Am I in a love triangle? No, I'm not, cause I'm not sure either of them like me the way I like them. "(Y/n)?! Still there?" Timmy waved his hand in front of the camera and I blink to bring myself back to this reality. "Yeah, no I'm here, I'm just..." letting the words fly in the air, I watch as Timmy looks at me a little worried. "Sweet sœr, I hope you know Matt called me, I was scared. Are you having those thoughts again?"

I look away, shy about my past, but knowing full well I have no reason to be, I look back at him. He's talking about the thoughts that inspired "everything I wanted". Back before the divorce, when I was still filming for Reconstructing Amelia, I was slowly sliding in a dark place, being in constant conflict with my parents, feeling alone, useless, stupid, meaningless. My life meant little to nothing to me back then, I had gotten so wrapped up in those dark corners of my mind, I don't know that I actually ever thought of doing anything to myself, but I was definitely thinking that if something bad were to happen I'd be ok with it. I made myself think it's ok to feel like that, but it's not, no matter what, your life should mean something to you. I am now in a stable place, my life means something to me, not much more than it used to, I'm still working on it, it's a long process. "No, double B, I'm not, I'm just tired and sick of everything. I wrote a beautiful song today, but you should sleep now, you look tired."

A smile creeps up on his lips, his white shiny teeth showing up. "Please tell me if that changes, I'll be there in a second." Shaking my head, I wipe some of my tears away. "I will, sleep well, sweet dreams!" We wave at each other and then end the call. I sigh throwing my phone on the bed and splay on top of the sheets, starting at the ceiling. With my eyes closed I can once again take myself back to that night, when we danced, drunk or red Shiraz wine, swaying to the sound of 'Are you lonesome tonight'. Humming to myself, I get up and change into my purple silk pajamas. Lost in thought I almost miss the phone buzzing. Answering the call without looking who it is first. As I pick it up and look at the screen, the fact that is yet another FaceTime call is obvious and mess of blonde hair is showing up on the screen.

"Hey there!" The breath gets caught in the back of my throat as I lock eyes with Austin through the screen. "Austin..." he chuckles at my dumbfounded face, almost like him FaceTiming me out of the blue is just as normal as drinking water. "Yeah, I just wanted to see how you were? Been thinking of you and I read that pice of shit of an article. I wanted to make sure you're fine" I'm still a bit confused about this whole interaction, not really sure if it's real or if sometime between talking to Timmy and changing I fell asleep, so now this is all a dream. A beautiful dream. I also try not to read too much into him saying he's been thinking of me. "(Y/n)?" Austin's voice grows concerned as I seem to be just a frozen image on his screen, unmoving and definitely not breathing.

Shaking myself up, I push some of my hair behind my ears. "Sorry, yeah, no. I'm, well, you know , right, I'm -" I'm fucking rambling nonsense. He licks his lips, catching the bottom one with his top teeth, the flesh turning white, as it's released from the tight bite. I swallow thickly, trying to gather myself up. Taking a deep breath. "Sorry, I'm tired. The article, was-" I pause searching for the right thoughts. "A misogynistic piece of shit." He finishes for me making me giggle. "Yes, that exactly." He seems to be happy that he's managed to make me smile, a pleased look on his face. "Busy day?" He asks and I nod.

"Fitting for the Oscars, then I was in the studio until a few hours ago." Austin hums low, that sound vibrating through me like electric current. "Anything I can hear?" The question catches me a bit off guard. "I get it if I have to wait with the rest till the album is complete and out, but I like hearing you sing." And this right here is what I meant when I said, I liked the way he played his game, because he's a master at making me fold. The blush that rose into my cheeks, a scarlet shade, painting my skin. "Wait here!" He laughs as I prop my phone up on my pillows and jump off the bed, to run into the living room and get my guitar.

"Ok, I'm back" I say jumping on the mattress, placing the guitar in my lap. "I can see!" He snickers, making me blush one more time. The soft pads of my fingers, brush the rough strings of the guitar, the simple cord progression filling the room with a beautiful slow sound. "Ok so this song is not done. I'm waiting for Finneas to come to New York next week and finish it." Austin nods, turning over in bed to lay on his side, one hand tucked under his head. Sleepy blue eyes staring at me. "Don't be that way, fall apart twice a day, I just wish you could feel what you say" I sing, harmonizing the words. "Show never tell, but I know you too well, Got a mood that you wish you could sell." Sighing I keep going, preparing myself for the dark and twisted chorus. "If teardrops could be bottled, there'd be swimming pools filled by models. Told a tight dress is what makes you... a whore" closing my eyes, I push back my feelings. "If 'I love you' was a promise, would you break it if you're honest? Tell the mirror what you know she's heard before"

"I don't want to be you anymore..." this is how far I've gotten to writing this one. Opening my eyes again, I look at Austin, but I'm not able to read anything about what he's thinking. "That was so beautiful." A relieved sound escapes my lips and I lick them before talking again. "Thank you, it's not really about runway models, I meant models, like, the people you look up to." He nods "Yeah I get that's it's about the pressure you're under when you're supposed to be some example for the world" blinking stupidly at him, I feel the kick of my heart against my chest, like a punch coming from the inside.

Placing my right hand on top of my heart, I massage slow circles into the muscles there, over my silk top. I see something in Austin's eyes change and if I didn't know any better I'd say it's jealousy? But that can't be it.

Looking down at the place where my hand rests on my chest, you can clearly see the bracelet Joshua gave me, but that upsetting him makes little to no sense, he clears his throat before speaking. "Did I get it right?" He asks, a tint of knowing in his tone. With a big smile on my face, I nod. Austin seems fairly pleased with getting the meaning of my song right.

In the silence that falls between us for a few seconds, my stomach growls and I pray he didn't hear it, but he did. "Did you eat today?" He asks and I try to hide my face in my shoulder, knowing how red it must be. It's embarrassing for my body to betray me like this. "No, I didn't have time" he sits up on his bed, ruffing up his curly hair. God how soft it look, I wish I could touch it.

"Go eat, it's not healthy to not eat." Sighing I look at my lap, running a list of everything I have in my fridge. There's plenty of food, but none of it sounds appetizing and I'd have to cook it, which I hate. "I'm not that hungry." As I say that, my stomach makes a point to growl again. "I think your body betrays you here." He says giggling. The sound of his soft laugh, bringing a smile to my face. "I'd have to cook, not my forte, I'll eat tomorrow." I try to reason, but it's clear he won't have it.

Austin stands up from his bed, confusing me a bit about where this is going. "Well I'm hungry as well, so why do we cook together?" He raises a brown at me, biting his lip in waiting for an answer, but he's already up and walking to his kitchen. I laugh and also drag myself off of the bed, to make my way into the kitchen. "Ok I'll trust you." He smiles from ear to ear, walking quickly through his house.

When the both of us are in the kitchen, I place my phone down, prompting it up on the counter against a jar of cat treats. "Let's make French toast? It's not hard." I shake my head before he gets a chance to defend the choice of food. "Ok not that, let's see..." he looks through his fridge and pulls out a cartoon of eggs. "Scrambled eggs?" Austin questions. "Yeah, that we can make." I say, going over to my fridge to get everything out.

After I lay everything out in front of me, looking at Austin expecting, waiting for me to tell me what to do, even though I actually know how to make eggs. "Ok put the pan on the stove, medium heat" I do as he says, following his steps, like I've never done this before, hoping he won't see through my little lie. "After it's warmed up, add butter and crack the eggs in it." Carefully I add butter into the pan and swirl it around to coat it evenly, then I crack two eggs and discard of their shells into the bin. "Good girl" I get goosebumps all over and it's a good thing I have my back to the phone cause I know that if he were to see my face right now, he'd catch me and my little crush. "Use the spatula to mix the eggs in the pan and break them into smaller pieces."

With a shaky hand I grab the spatula and do as instructed, staring into the pan, like it'll give me an answer, like those eggs would arrange themselves into a sentence and say: you're not dreaming, he likes you too. Suddenly I feel an itch all over my skin, like I miss something and when I realize what it is, it hits me like a train. Because it's his touch. I miss him. The way he swayed with me in my living room, like we had no worry in the world. "Show me." Austin demands and in a robotic stance I take the phone and turn the camera towards the pan. "You're a natural, add salt and pepper." I put the phone down, adding the seasoning as he said.

After a few minutes our virtual cooking class ends and we are sitting each at our table, in different states, looking at each other through a phone. "So when are you coming to LA for the Verity interview?" He asks eating some food. Putting some food into my mouth as well and chewing it carefully, I skim through my schedule into my brain. "Hm so today it the 28th, Oscars are on March 12th, I should be there on the 15th" I nod double confirming the information I just gave. "You'll have to come over, have dinner, I'll make you pizza in my stone oven, I bought this house especially for it, my ex's had one and in the beginning of quarantine I got addicted to it."

"Yeah I know, you told me you once cooked 20 pizzas in a day." I interrupt and he laughs drinking some water, leaving me staring at his Adam's apple moving up and down. "Yeah I guess I did, so are you coming?" Eating some more food into, I try not to seems so desperate about seeing him, so I struggle to be casual. "Sure, I will." Austin seems happy with the answer. "Great it's settled, I promise you, I'll cook you the best pizza you've ever had."

"Could you actually teach me how to make it? You're a good teacher." I ask. Austin seems a bit surprised at my request, but a wide smirk quickly appears on his face as he scratches his chin. " 'Course I'll teach you, we'll make it all, from the dough to the very end" I raise my brows at him, shocked at the extent of his love for cooking. "Hm ok then it's only fair I find something to teach you." I get up from the table and move over to the sink to rinse the plate and pan and put them into the dishwasher, cleaning after myself. "How about crochet?" He suggests, the fact that he remembered it is a hobby of mine, making my heart skip a beat. "Sure, I'll do it." I say drying my hands on a towel, folding it and placing it back in its place afterwards.

Taking the phone in hand and walking back into my room, I plop down onto the bed. "Was that a twilight poster I just saw?" Austin asks, a deep color flushing my cheeks. "Maybe" I bite my lip to stop my smile from getting too big and turn the camera around to show him my poster wall. "Wow, marvel, Disney, twilight, lady Gaga, Madonna, you've got all the goods." Austin's amazed tone makes me laugh. "Well what can I say, I like the things I like and I love posters, let me show you this one." I get up and take him over to the opposite wall to show him the huge poster I have of Elvis singing dressed in the leather suit, for the '68 comeback show. "I have that suit." Turning the camera quickly around so he could see my surprised face, I search his face for a hint that this is a lie, no way he just casually confessed to stealing such a piece.

"I'll show it to you when you come over, I have the movie replica of course, but still, it's beautiful." His raspy voice sounds so angelic, I could listen to it nonstop. "I can't wait for you to show me." I say jumping back on the bed. "You didn't show me your room, when I was over Saturday." Austin points out, pouting like a little child. "It escaped my mind, I guess" I try to play it cool, but he can probably see right through me, as he laughs. "I'm sure it did." A wide smirk stretching on his face.

I turn on my side in bed and put the phone down on some pillows, so he can see me without me having to hold the phone up. "So how about you, any interesting work in the future?" He shakes his head rubbing his eyes with the back of his hands. "Not for the moment, just press, but then I start working on Dune 2, in late August, so I guess that one will be exciting." I knew that, Timmy told me he was casted for a role in that movie, but I try to hide the fact that that was already known information for me. "Hm means you'll get to know Tim plenty." I conclude. "Yeah, I guess I will. Though I'm not sure he likes me, that much." I shrug my shoulders, knowing that's only half true. "It's my fault though, I kind of, you know"

"Dated his ex?" I finish for him, as he nods. Austin's lips stretch out in a thin line, he seems fairly embarrassed by the fact that I knew about him and Lily-Rose. "Well Timmy will get over it." Relieved he lets out a breath that gets caught in his lungs midway, following my next words. "If you are on your best behavior" I push my lips together trying to hold my laughter in, but failing miserably as a fit of laughter shakes my body and he follows suit joining me. "Your laughter is so beautiful." I stop laughing and look at him wide eyed, he seems just as surprised as me, that those words came out of his mouth. Austin moves his mouth open and closed like he's trying to say something, but nothing comes out and I'm holding my breath, scared that if I were to breathe right now, this whole moment would vanish. "Thank you." I whisper, placing the backs of my hands on my cheeks, feeling how hot the flesh is burning.

Neither of us knows how to move on from what just happened, but we have to bounce back. He has a girlfriend and I'm, well, I guess I'm just me. William jumps up on the bed and comes to snuggle close to me, getting in the camera view. A wide grin shows up on my face as I pet the cats fur and it immediately starts purring. "Hey there good boy." Austin says, as William turns his small head towards my phone, sniffing at the screen, before burying his face in my neck, making me giggle at feeling of his wet nose against my warm skin. "He likes me" Austin states proudly, smiling from ear to ear. Just then a yawn goes past my lips and in true lady fashion I cover my mouth with my hand.

"You're tired and I'm keeping you up." He says sounding disappointed. It's then that I look at the time and see it's now almost midnight, means I should probably get back to sleep as I have yet another early morning tomorrow. "It's fine-" "Oh god I'm so stupid, it must be midnight in New York right now, I'm so sorry." He interrupts me, apologizing for not taking into account the three hours difference. The way he seems so upset with himself, raises a new feeling within me, again a very unknown, very warm feeling, indescribable by all means. "You should be sleeping" now Austin's voice sounds almost scolding, like he's somewhat directing the loosing track of time on me as well. I feel small and bring my knees up to my chest, caging William in between my torso and legs. "I'm sorry, it's my fault, I should have thought about time difference." Austin sighs, dragging a hand over his face. "I just, I don't know, I got home and picked up the phone, calling without thinking."

"It's ok Austin, no harm was done, plus if it weren't for you, I probably would've gone to sleep without eating." The features on his face don't soften, if anything they grow more stern. "I'll take that win, but you should know that's not ok, you should be eating!" He seems to be slowly relaxing and coming back to his jovial stance. "Anyway guess it's time I let you sleep. Sweet dreams, my darling!" He puts three fingers up to his lips, kissing then and blowing the kiss to me. My heart starts racing and my cheeks flush a deep burgundy color. "Goodnight Austin!" I say and end the call with a small wave.

After the call is ended, I shift on my back and hold the device close to my heart. "My darling" I whisper, as if the words were a sacred spell. He called me darling and he called me his. The ceiling is spinning and I feel light headed. I can feel the irregular thud of my heart against my breast bone and I struggle to get my breathing back to normal. I feel like I'm flying. Is this how having a crush feels like? Like you're drunk? Not that I've ever been drunk, but I've been tipsy in the past and it feels like that, only stronger.

Closing my eyes I dive back into my memory of his soft lips against my cheek, the way it felt as the little wet spot left behind dried. I go back to his flaming hands on my waist, missing the weight of them. I remember the way my cheek rested so perfectly against his chest as he held me close, like we were two puzzle pieces, designed to fit together.

I'm woken up from all my dreaming as the phone vibrates against my chest, my excitement picking up, thinking it might be Austin. The notification is not from him, but it still has the power to get me to blush even harder, if that were possible. Joshua's name shines on the screen and I open the text.

🎶Joshua🎶:

Hi, sorry for not calling today as I promised and sorry for the late hour, I just got back to my hotel from a gig.

Me:

No worries, I don't mind the hour.

🎶Joshua🎶:

Let me make it up to you. Are you free tomorrow?

Me:

Sure, I think I can manage some free time around noon.

🎶Joshua🎶:

Perfect, how about a walk in Central Park?

Me:

That's my favorite place in the city.

🎶Joshua🎶:

Ha lucky me, seems like I guessed right and you'll be sharing that secret place with me after all. I count on you for a tour💟

Me:

You've got it. Good guess by the way. Hope your gig went well. Did you have fun?

🎶Joshua🎶:

Yes!!! it was amazing, I love playing in front of my fans. I have another one Thursday night, you should come.

Me:

Hmm 🤔 sure I'll be there.

🎶Joshua🎶:

Ok I'll sing my best! I should let you sleep now. Have a nice sleep, honey💟

Me:

I'm 100% sure you'll do great. Get some sleep as well, it's late. Gn💟

I lock my phone and place it on my nightstand, trying the relax enough, so that I could get some well deserved sleep, but I'm wide awake. Wide awake thinking of how my mind keeps circling back to every pet name Austin and Joshua use with me, struggling to convince myself they are just verbal ticks and not a real signs of affection.

Pushing my face harder against the pillows, I count my breaths, slowly coming down to sleep. But before I fall into complete darkness a flash of color splashes in front of my eyes, it's blue, a shiny Egyptian blue - his eyes.

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gurugirl · 4 months

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to the other anon, i don’t think it’s fair to assume that celebrities have any hold or sway to change what is happening in the world. if you need a celeb to validate your feelings, that says more about you than it does them. i don’t agree that him not speaking on something makes him a “bad person”. he has no sway in anything, and it could be dangerous for him or any other celeb to voice their opinions on literally anything. he cannot change what world leaders are doing to support israel, and if someone is supporting israel is set in their ways and their mindset, he won’t change their mind either. like either way it’s a lose/lose situation. fwiw: i support palestine and hate what israel is doing to them, committing a mass genocide with no repercussions, and it makes me SO angry, but im not getting mad about every celebrity that refuses to speak on the issue. that’s not what they signed up for when they became famous. idk just my two cents. i can form my own opinions without needing and influencer or celeb to share them and make me feel better???

The kind feelings this tragic genocide can induce is so varied. Some of us feel things so deeply that it really does ruin joy.

I understand anon but as I’ve gotten older and have seen a lot of tragic and awful things in my life I’ve learned if I let things outside of my control continue to make my life miserable and allow those things to alienate myself from stuff and people I love, I would not have made it this far in life.

It’s wonderful that anon is so empathetic and wants others to be that way too but it starts to wear away at your soul to the point you have no one and enjoy nothing.

And the other point of Harry becoming a target is real. I’m going to use an example of Taylor Swift telling people at her concerts to vote. Republicans were up in arms and Fox News had these pundits arguing about it (you can google this - they were going nuts that she told concertgoers to vote). The backlash led to her getting death threats - and that’s just for telling people to employ their civic duty and vote. Imagine what kind of backlash Harry styles (a very recognizable, household name - super A+ list celeb) would get if he were to say a word about the genocide?

I get anon. I really do but It’s hard to say he should or he shouldn’t bc this is one of those things his platform isn’t going to be able to change. No matter the public opinion, as you said, world leaders are the ones calling the shots on what’s happening at this point. Public opinion will not make a difference in the outcome, as disgusting and infuriating it is.

Xoxo

#ask

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britesparc · 2 years

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Weekend Top Ten #543

Top Ten Celebrities in Videogames

This feels like a topic I’ve been postponing for a while, and yet here I am writing it in a rush. Go me. That’s partly because of the hot heat last week, and also because I was kinda expecting to write a “cool things I read about at SDCC” list. Except that, really, I didn’t feel there was enough there to make a list. Even the Marvel Studios panel, as incredibly exciting as it was, didn’t really give out a megaton announcement; no Spielberg directing Fantastic Four, no Daniel Radcliffe as Wolverine, etc. Not to say it was disappointing at all – Cap! Daredevil! Kang! – but I just don’t think I could pad it out to a full list. Anyway, here we are, turning back to something I was gonna write a few weeks ago, and it’s on the subject of famous people turning up in computer games.

It’s actually not at all uncommon for A-list Hollywood actors to appear in a videogame nowadays. Just like voicing an animated movie, there’s no stigma attached to playing a videogame character. Even if we just want to talk about games that feature fully-voiced characters played by actors, there are people in the world who’ve grown up knowing nothing else, so it makes sense. Having said that, there are celebrities who jump out when you think about gaming performances. Whether it’s a particularly idiosyncratic performance, or someone who you just wouldn’t think would do this sort of thing, or even if it happened at a time – let’s say the nineties – when a famous actor being in a game was a lot more rare, sometimes the association of Hollywood and Electronics Boutique gives a game a certain something.

So this list really is just me talking about my favourite moments of famous people in games. I know there are a lot missing – quite a lot of huge mainstream narrative games feature celebrities nowadays – and also this isn’t a critique of any performances. These are just ones that, for one reason or another, I think are really cool.

Anyway, that’s it. Nothing more to say. Oh, except that I really wanted to include Chris Barrie in Simon the Sorcerer, but unfortunately I’ve never played the CD release with full spoken audio. I had the game on the Amiga 1200 so I had to read the text like a plumb. Can you imagine?

Everyone in Command and Conquer: Red Alert 3 (2008): where to start with this, the mother(Russia)lode of celebs in games? Well, you’ve got J.K. Simmons as the President of the United States; George Takei as the Emperor of Japan; the likes of Jonathan Pryce and Peter Stormare popping up in supporting roles; and, piece de resistance, Tim Curry as the Soviet Premier. Everyone knows what type of product they’re in, relishing the chance to break out their B-movie moves, hamming it up till the cows come home. It’s delicious, never more so than Curry’s tremendous, flamboyant, demented performance. “SPAAAAAACE!”

Christopher Lloyd in Toonstruck (1996): back when full-motion video and CD audio were both in their ascendency, Toonstruck gave us not only FMV cutscenes (featuring Ben Stein as Lloyd’s boss), but also an animated adventure starring a plethora of voice actor superstars (including Curry again!). and, leading the pack, as the human in a toon world, was Lloyd, put-upon, dishevelled cartoonist-cum-reluctant hero. It’s a great performance, and the mid-nineties thrill of controlling a photographic human avatar in an animated world helped sell the Roger Rabbit vibe of the whole thing. A cult classic and forgotten gem.

Martin Sheen in Mass Effect 2 (2010): there are some people you just don’t expect to crop up in a game, and I’d say President Bartlet is one of them. Lending his sonorous voice and regal gravitas, he plays the mysterious and somewhat nefarious Illusive Man, a secretive chain-smoking string-puller with funny eyes. It’s a performance loaded with quiet menace, as we don’t know quite how far to trust this clearly shady fella; whether his ends-justify-the-means schtick will prove ultimately necessary. He walks that line between outright pantomimic villainy and morally grey necessity perfectly, giving the story a heck of a backbone.

Keanu Reeves in Cyberpunk 2077 (2020): whereas Sheen was a serious presence that was a surprising addition to a game, Reeves is just, like, super famous. What’s Neo doing in a game? You can’t really go much bigger; Leo, Tom, or Will, probably (Will before Oscar night, natch). And it’s not just a performance; he’s there, digitally recreated. It’s fitting for the trippy cyberpunk (small c) plot. And it’s kind of a shocking role as he’s sort of the villain, and certainly a dark, vulgar character, dropping c-bombs and killing dudes all over the place, as well as slowly erasing the player’s personality with his own. He lends the game a good deal of cool credibility, and gives a performance that elevates the whole thing. He’s breath-taking.

Jack Black in Brutal Legend (2009): the part of a schlubby roadie in a heavy metal-inspired action game seems tailor made for Black. It’s not so much he makes the role his own as the character just is Black, or at least a version of his common screen persona. Part School of Rock, part Tenacious D, part High Fidelity, that Black – Black in his ascendency, peak of his leading man career – is distilled into this one

Mark Hamill in Wing Commander III: Heart of the Tiger (1994): the Wing Commander games already leaned into the cinematic right from the start, with operatic stories and animated cutscenes. So going the full motion video route wasn’t too much of a surprise, but adding the genuine sci-fi star wattage of Luke Skywalker was a bit of a flex. I’ll be honest: I’ve not played the game enough to know how it all panned out, but back there and back then, the fact that Mark Hamill was flying starfighters again (whilst looking a bit more grizzled and badass than he ever did in an X-Wing) was huge.

Christopher Walken in Ripper (1996): another journey into the glory days of mid-nineties FMV, Ripper was a frankly pretty crap “interactive movie” where you solved a series of grisly murder by basically doing 3D jigsaws and sliding-block puzzles. But my mate had it and was obsessed by it, mostly due to Walken going really big as a belligerent and foul-mouthed detective. “You can’t slice bacon with a baseball bat” is one of his less-fruity lines.

Nathan Fillion in Halo 3: ODST (2009): Fillion’s role as Buck in the Halo games has carried on from ODST, most recently appearing in Halo 5. ODST was amusing as something of a Firefly reunion, with Alan Tudyk (yay!) and Adam Baldwin (boo!) also making appearances. But it was Buck that endured, leaning into Fillion’s performance, his appearance becoming more of a recreation of Fillion’s own face as technology improved. He’s the good, kind, earnest teammate, eventually graduating from ODST to Spartan, and all the while he’s got that little bit of Nathan Fillion twinkle.

Terry Crews in Crackdown 3 (2019): as a huge Crackdown fan – the original is up there with Fable II and Halo 3 as one of my favourite Xbox 360-era games – even I have to admit that Crackdown 3 was a bit disappointing after all the hullaballoo, but one thing it got right was Terry Crews. The face of the game, his character – a veteran agent – really leans into Crews’ established persona, basically being Terry Crews But An Agent From Crackdown. It’s like Brooklyn Nine-Nine’s Sergeant Jeffers, but from an alternate, dystopic timeline. And he is – of course – hilarious, part life coach, part drill instructor, part affable idiot.

Steven Spielberg in Steven Spielberg’s Director’s Chair (1996): okay, I’m gonna confess; I’ve never actually played this game. But by God I wanted to. A huge fan of movies, especially Spielberg movies, and Tarantino movies (he’s in this too), the thought of playing a game hosted by The Beard himself, that allowed you to make your own movie, and it also had Tarantino and Jennifer Aniston in it? This sounded so far up my street that it was essentially sleeping in my bed. The fact that it got mediocre reviews, criticising its limited gameplay, was neither here nor there; I wanted my Spielberg FMV editing game, dammit. In later years I’ve taken to wondering: who directed the FMV sequences? Not just the Spielberg bits, but the scenes of Tarantino and Aniston? With Steve’s name on the box, imagine just how intimidating that must have been. Balls of steel and all that.

Speaking of Jennifer Aniston, it’s not a game per se, but I’ve always got time to rewatch the “introduction to Windows 95” corporate video thing that she made with Matthew Perry. The nineties were, as they say nowadays, a lot.

#top ten #games #gaming #celebrities #celebrities in games #toonstruck #brutal legend #spielberg #red alert 3

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aidansplaguewind · 8 months

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Which other famous people give you bad vibes, apart from Cillian Murphy and Ewan McGregor?

First, I just wanna say with Ewan McGregor it feels like more than a vibe. He was my celeb crush when I was 17 and at that point he wasn't super well known. Moulin Rouge had just released on DVD, his first Star Wars movie had already come out but Attack of the Clones wouldn't come out until after I'd been into him for a bit. But still, he wasn’t as well known or as popular yet. He used to diss Hollywood so much cuz he was just too cool and indie. Later I would come to recognize this as pretentiousness. But it's clear he only said all that shit because he wasn’t important enough yet to be considered Hollywood. Then he became a Hollywood cliché, leaving his wife of a shit ton of years for a much younger costar. His kids expressed their own ick all over their social media. Look, when kids turn against a parent, it's usually for good reason. He let Hollywood change him. Or maybe he was always a piece of shit, he was just waiting for the opportunity to let it show.

I love that Aidan actually is super indie but doesn't diss everything that's Hollywood. He understands that both sides have a purpose and good films can be found on both sides but he hasn't let it change him.

Now, back to your question, which BTW I have been stewing on for a few days - it's so hard for me to think of shit when people actually ask me but any other time I can.

He's not super well known but Claes Bang. Total ick and I'm pretty sure it's accurate ick based off what a couple fans told me who had the displeasure of interacting with him.

Jared Leto. Ick, ick, ick. Has ALWAYS given me ick.

Alec Baldwin gave me the ick since I was a kid. And that's a long time ago.

I think Benedict Cumberbatch too.

There are definitely more but I can't think of them when asked. I'll update the list if I think of anyone else.

#anon #the ick #vibes #there goes me getting long-winded again #as usual

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liu82stephens · 2 years

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bluefirewrites · 3 years

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not sure if u are still taking this but, celebrity/fan au for JUKEE 🤭

Okay this one's a little involved but I got you!

Rated T for mentions of sex and maybe some language

SEND ME A SHIP AND A NUMBER AND I’LL WRITE A SHORT FIC

******

Julie tugs against the rather short dress Flynn had squeezed her in, not caring for how much she looks like a glorified candy wrapper in the shimmering gold.

She feels like she's some Ferrer Roche, waiting to be devoured.

Which seems to be her intention for tonight because she's insane, and so is her bestie Flynn, because she's supposed to grab the attention of a certain someone in this club.

Her motives for tonight sound like they come straight out of a Wattpad story, but her boyfriend- or well maybe an ex boyfriend now'- forced her hand.

So a year ago, right around the time they started dating, they both disclosed their 'hall passes'. Just a list of celebrities they were both 'allowed' to cheat on their partners with. It was fun. Just to see who the other person would pick.

It was harmless because the whole point is that these people are so famous, so far out of reach, that the odds of hooking up with them would be essentially impossible.

Nick's was the lead singer of the world famous pop group Dirty Candi. And Julie remembers drunkenly applauding the choice ("She's pretty! Wowww you like them Bubblegum Pop girls?")

They had a laugh that night and Julie doesn't really consider that hall pass conversation all that much since then-

-Until fast forward to last week when Nick disclosed to her that he ran into Carrie Wilson at an event. And then promptly disclosed to her that he invoked his 'Hall Pass' rights.

His rights?! She had exploded at him, and he claims that its no big deal. That he thought she would understand that it was a once in a lifetime opportunity, a crazy set of circumstances, and that- 'Holy shit Jules, she was actually into me. Like what?'

Understandably, Julie stormed out and has been staying with Flynn for the time being. And it must have been the haze of crying and watching a lot of true crime series to cheer herself up that she and Flynn concocted this... plan.

One fueled by spite and pettiness.

Get back at Nick, make him jealous, make him feel how she did- by invoking her own 'Hall Pass' rights-

-which so happens to be Sunset Curve frontman, Luke Patterson...

"There he is" Flynn whispers from their corner of the club and Julie gulps.

"I don't think I can do this," Julie hisses at Flynn, when they spot him at the bar, nursing a drink with his bandmates like he usually would (they did their research).

See, Julie’s been a fan of Luke’s for a long time. Ever since she heard ‘Now or Never’ in freshman year of high school, she’s been hooked onto their music- especially Luke and his voice and playing.

She had their posters on her bedroom wall and had been that girl who would (when no one’s looking) press her fingers to her lips then press them against Luke’s image before going to bed.

It was that bad.

And Julie had probably fantasized on more than one occasion of meeting him and all the other scenarios you would picture in a typical Celeb x Reader scenario.

And she’d like to think she grew out of it, now she’s in her mid-twenties and just casually listens to Sunset Curve, following up on their careers every now and then.

But you can never really shake your first major celebrity crush. Hence he had been on her so called ‘Hall Pass’ list.

(”You into rockstars, Jules?” Nick had teased her that night.)

Seeing him there, in the same place as her, is so surreal, but Flynn’s continued pinches to her arm remind her just how real this is.

“This is ridiculous,” Julie crosses her arms, ready to bow out because what is she thinking? Why would Luke Patterson pick her up, of all people, at the bar? It’s like a supermodel runway in here, filled with girls more accomplished and famous. Her confidence is shaken a bit and she rethinks everything.

"Nick didn't seem to have a problem when he did it," Flynn points out, “And girl, you look great. He would be blind to not want you.”

The mention of Nick still boils her blood, which only reaffirms her plans for revenge. She’s still nervous but they both stand up from their booth and walk over to the bar.

“You’re just saying that because you’re my best friend,”

“No. You’re musician extraordinaire, Julie Molina! The world may not have heard about you, but they will one day. I bet that’s something you can talk to him about. Music? Lyrics?”

Julie could use her songwriting credentials to her advantage, “I mean I guess-”

“Quick, he’s getting up!”

“Flynn, wait I’m not-”

With a forceful push, Flynn sends Julie into the path of Luke Patterson, colliding into him and effectively spilling his drink all over her dress.

“Oh my god,” Luke gapes at her, “I am so sorry-”

Julie fans herself, shaking slightly from the fact she’s drenched and also that her freakin’ high school celebrity crush is looking at her, actually talking to her.

But she recovers quickly, and she speaks, “It’s fine. Really. I guess I’m just... clumsy.” She shoots a glare at Flynn, who merely winks and retreats to their booth.

Luke grimaces and takes her by the hand, leading her somewhere, napkins in his other hand, “Here, let’s get you cleaned up. Again, I’m sorry. Hate to ruin a pretty... dress.”

It’s the way he eyes her that catches Julie off guard. He’s... not talking about the dress, is he?

Julie reels it back in tries her hand at a joke, “I wouldn’t call this a dress. I feel like fancy leftovers in this thing.”

Luke stifles a laugh, “Okay, I mean I wasn’t gonna say anything but yeah. I guess it’s a bit tin foil-y.”

“Not your style?”

His gaze drifts over to her one last time, “Well, any way to take a meal back home is fine by me. I mean-” Luke scrunches his nose, wincing, “I didn’t- I didn’t mean it like that. Shit. That was too... much. Are we-” he laughs nervously, “Are we still... talking about food?”

“Unless you just called me a meal. Then no.”

The look in his eyes say that he’s absolutely mortified, “...yeah. I think I did. I was hoping that was a nightmare.”

“Nope, it definitely happened,”

“Feel free to slap me,”

Julie giggles, somewhat delirious because she hasn’t tried to flirt with him but here Luke is, flirting with her. Or trying. And failing. Like a far cry from the suave rockstar she had pictured him to be.

“No need. Just, can you-?” she points to the napkins he’s holding hostage.

“Oh yeah. Here,” They stop in front of the coat check, and he hands her the napkins so she could try herself off with the best she can.

Suddenly, a weight falls onto her shoulders, she looks up and sees Luke draping a jacket over her- his presumably.

“You looked cold,”

Julie wraps the jacket tight against her, relishing in the warmth, “Wow, thanks.”

Luke smiled and stepped back, “Just so you know, if I made you feel weird in any way, I’d like to throw out my third ‘sorry’ of the night. Nothing has to happen though. So, just say the word and I’ll leave you alone.”

Whew. Um, okay. Julie stands there, faced with this decision.

The compliments aside (she will revisit those later), Luke’s giving her an out. Any reservations she has about moving forward with this plan, this is her chance to leave.

She could just treasure these amazing few minutes for the rest of her life. This could be a story to tell friends at a dinner party, about the time a rockstar lent her his jacket. Would be up there with the time Jack Black passed her on the street and said “Nice hat!”.

But-

Maybe she wants to see where this goes.

“All this talk about food is making me hungry though...” she says and Luke lights up, “I could go for a bite to eat.”

Luke snaps his fingers, “I know just the place.”

*******

Half an hour later, Julie and Flynn are in a smelly alleyway with the guys from Sunset Curve, in line for a street dog cart just a couple blocks away.

“An Oldsmobile?” Julie gawked after hearing Luke and the guys describe the delicacy, “Are you trying to poison me?”

“I swear by it,” Luke insists, taking her hand and moving them up in the line. Flynn sees this and doesn’t comment, but Julie’s starting to get used to Luke doing that, “You have to try!”

Julie doesn't know when she got over her initial starstruck, but by now its so easy to treat Luke like a regular person.

Well, celebrities are all regular people in the end, but more so now that he and his friends, have their sleeves rolled up, smiles wide, ready to dig into what may be the most disgusting hot dog she has ever seen.

Julie takes a bite out of hers and her eyes widen. Wow. It's not terrible.

"Ayy! We got another one, boys" Reggie laughs, noting her reaction.

"Told ya" Luke needles her sides and she giggles, ticklish. Her knee jerk reaction is to playfully shove him, but in the process accidentally smeared some mustard onto his face.

Luke goes to lick it off with his tongue, making funny faces as he did which amused Julie even more.

"Here," she takes a napkin and wipes at his cheek, "Now we're even."

The whole group gets to talking over by the couches, while Flynn chats up the other boys, Julie and Luke are sequestered in their own corner, and yes, eventually the topic switches to music.

"Wait, so you know Rose and the Petal Pushers?" Luke chokes out, "Like everyone I talk to hasn't heard of them!"

"Yup. Have their record actually" Julie beams proudly, censoring out the part that its her mom's band and hence she has one of the few records ever released.

Luke is floored by that and continues to poke her brain for music and Julie finds that their spiels go on naturally, that she could probably talk with Luke for hours and hours.

Which ends up happening. Flynn had already made her escape, having texted her to come home safely, the boys had gone too, leaving them in the nearly empty lot.

When the food truck closes down for the night, they end up taking a stroll down the streets of L.A, talking and getting to know each other.

Julie learns so much about Luke, things she's never heard about from the press- like his songwriting practice, that he cries at Finding Nemo, and that he can do a cartwheel only when drunk.

And in return Julie shares with him her crazy college stories, how she misses her mom sometimes, and that she is encyclopedia of commercial jingles (a fact Luke exploits by rapidly quizzing her at random moments)

Somehow they end up near the beach, with Julie pointing out the different stars she could see, but finds that Luke isn't looking at the sky.

"Hey, Julie..." He gets her attention, "I had a really good time tonight."

"Me too"

"So... would it be alright, if I kiss you?"

Julie's mouth parts, speechless. It happened. Holy shit it happened or... is happening. She has Luke exactly where she wants him.

She could only nod and Luke takes it as the sign to lean in, but just as his lips is about to brush against hers, she freaks-

"Wait" she steps back. Luke opens his mouth, "No. No more 'sorry's from you. This one's one me. I'm sorry but... this- this" She sighs, "I have to be honest with you."

Then she tells Luke everything- Nick, The Hall Pass, her plans for tonight- basically admitting to using him.

When she's done, she expects for Luke to get angry, to leave in a huff and never want to see her again.

That's not what happens.

"This Nick guy sounds like a piece of work" he says.

Julie nods slowly, "Yeah... I guess he was. So maybe that's why I did it. But I don't think I could have gone through with it. Like I don't think we're together, me and Nick but-"

"You wouldn't want to do what he did. Because you don't want to hurt people," Luke surmises, understanding, "And by doing that, that means you're a better person than he is."

"I guess"

"No Julie, you're a good person" Luke insists, "Man, I think that makes me like you even more."

Julie laughs, "God, if my high school self could see me now..."

"You were a big fan?"

"I'm not having this conversation right now with you,"

"Okay cuz now you got me curious-"

Julie swats his shoulder but it doesn't deter the guy from snickering.

On a more serious note though-

"I think..." Julie hums, "I think this means that I got some stuff to work through. Before I could start considering... this."

"I understand"

"But thank you... Luke. For tonight"

"It's been real, Julie,"Luke smiles and pulls her in for a half hug, "And you should keep the jacket. Looks better on you anyway."

****

Julie goes back to Flynn's that night and her bestie's still awake, wanting all the deets. But there's not much to tell. Nothing happened.

She shrugs off the jacket and resigns to the couch, not caring that her makeup is still on. She's about ready to pass out.

Her phone dings.

She pulls it out and sees two notifications.

luke_patterson is now following you

luke_patterson is requesting to message you.

Curious, she accepts the request.

'here if you want to talk, Tin Foil :P'

Julie rolls her eyes and collapses onto the couch, sleeping with a smile on her face.

She doesn't know it now, but the oncoming years would be filled with more messages back and forth, meetups with their friends for more shady street food, building a solid foundation of friendship and eventually, when Luke asks again if he could kiss her, Julie would eagerly prop herself on her toes to close the gap.

Yeah, Julie's high school self would definitely be screaming...

#jatp #julie and the phantoms #juke #julie molina #luke patterson #luke x julie #julie x luke #this one turned into an actual fic wtf #lol #i got carried away #long post #blue answers asks #celebrity/fan au

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real-fanta-sea · 2 years

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I was tagged by @definegodliness to answer the following 16 questions - thank you for tagging me! 😊💙 Now let's get down to smashing that keyboard *cracks knuckles*

Hi Mutuals! It’s random question day. Please answer honestly & tag 5+ friends. Have fun!

1. Which celeb would you want as your other BFF and why?

Wow, this one is tough - starting with a sucker punch, are we? Truth to be told I have no idea who's famous these days and who's not (and yes I like the rock I live under very much, thanks for asking), so let's say I'd like to befriend Edna Mode, Shrek, Rob Zombie, Elton John or Dolly Parton - they seem like decent people and only two of them are fictional, which is nice

2. What’s the last lie you told??

I told a student I don't mind calling her an hour later - I prefer to get lessons done as soon as possible and as scheduled, but it turned out to be a great chat in the end so no harm was done

3. When’s the last time you felt inspired to create something?

Today, between 16:25 and 19:37 to be precise - and despite myself, I channeled this surge of energy not into writing or drawing, but into my german homework (props to my teacher who knows I give writing exercises my best - I was ecstatic when she told me to first list as many words as I can remember that contain german personal pronouns AND to write a story as long as possible where I must use alliteration only - now I'm ravenous for new vocabulary... smart move, Pavla)

4. What’s your all-time favorite dessert

Pistachio ice cream (preferably accompanied by a scoop of strawberry one)

5. If you were an animal, what would you be?

Probably something small - a bee, or a coral reef fish, if I had a choice. But if I just randomly reincarnated, I bet I would be one of those funky elephants who can paint

6. Have you ever used a dating app?

Nope

7. What’s your No.1 karaoke song?

Since I've never been to a Karaoke, I'll list the one I can sing from the top of my head at any time - Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen (basically anything by Queen, My Chemical Romance or Lucie really - and songs from Shrek, Durch den Monsun by Tokio Hotel and Take me to church by Horzier)

8. Have you ever been on a blind date?

Does a date on which I didn't wear my glasses count?

9. If a song played every time you entered a room, what would it be?

Oh no, there are so many options - I was tempted to choose 'the Gladiator march' by Julius Fučík, or the Overture of 'La Gazza Ladra' by Rossini, but I'm gonna go with "Sonne" by Rammstein because it holds so many good highschool memories and we sang the chorus line ('hier kommt die Sonne' - here comes the sun) with my best friend when either of us entered our room to wind each other up.

10. When’s the last time you got to really experience nature?

On Monday - I went on a long walk with my dog along the river bank. The path there is thin and almost always void of people, so I can unleash her (she is desperate to sniff everything in her vicinity and I can only take so much of having my wrist jerked around by her), and enjoy the stroll through the bright sea of buttercups and sprouting leaves. At the very end of the walk we stopped in an abandoned orchard where plum trees returned to their feral beauty and just basked in the sun and enchanting sweet scent of those thinly veiled beauties.

Since it's spring, I get to experience a lot of nature in the garden as well, but it's tame and cultured compared to the wilderness.

11. What’s an unexpected movie that makes you cry?

It's from an Italian collection of short film stories called 'Viva Italia!'. There's a story about an old lady who has a nice day out with her adult son. They go for a walk together, eat ice cream, and have a nice chat. But, when it's time to go home, he takes her to a nursing home instead where she clearly doesn't want to stay - he tells her his wife wants her house and that it is the best for all involved if she stays and doesn't come back. She begs him to take her home, but he doesn't listen. When he's leaving, he shouts after the nurses "Treat her as if she was a queen!" and she stays there, behind bars on the window, watching him drive away.

I also cry whenever I watch the documentary series called 'old people's home for 4 years old' - it's on YouTube if you feel like shedding a couple of tears

12. Do you consider yourself religious or spiritual?

Spiritual.

13. If you could only listen to one singer or band for the rest of your life, who would you choose?

That would be the death of me probably, so it doesn't matter who I choose as the end would come quick and be merciless.

Seriously though, I would probably choose Ben Lukas Boysen or I Want Poetry - they are fairly active and there is always something new to listen to.

14. What was the last movie you watched in a theater?

Infinity War and Endgame marathon - my sister didn't want to go alone. It was like watching a perfectly engineered modern epic made to please as many as possible: pompous, filled with action and glorification of heroes but void of anything I would give a second thought after leaving the theatre. I don't know, I guess I like my epic movie protagonists short and their feet hairy.

15. Who is your hero?

'He's a Juke box heroo - got staars in his eyeees'🎶🎶

16. What is your favorite animated film?

Mary and Max (followed closely by The Triplets of Belleville)

I tag @samphiresea @becuzmdsaidineededpersonality @aintgonnaleaveyoumikey @grafedelweiss @h-weber-exe and @northofsomewhere

And anyone who feels like participating 😊 have fun, sweeties!

#tag game

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1d-discourseoftheday · 3 years

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💙 Tues 5 Jan ‘21 💚

Is today's biggest story really a pair of socks I mean WHY NOT am I right, that may as well happen! With impeccable timing, as the fandom and the world went bananas about Ho-livia WildStyle (a drag queen name for the ages right there), the first of the limited edition TPWK socks that people ordered basically on blind faith (you fully couldn't tell what they were going to look like at all on the website, and now we know why lmao) have arrived with a bang: they seemed to come with either blue or pink hearts, but in fact it turns out you get one of two color combos, either pink and white or, uh: BLUE AND GREEN HEARTS. I'm not one to carry on about like jeans and a green shirt or what have you but this is a CHOICE, and if the antis don't have performative burnings of their evil larrie merch honestly WHAT is the POINT; the resale market of the limited edition socks is already booming though so there's always that option, if either side can bear to conduct business across the divide. My question is, did they really time it to play out this precisely on purpose? Unlikely tbh, but if that's a thing they're capable of I have some THOUGHTS about the way other Harry merch takes like 4 months to arrive...

Larrie socks aside however, the real discourse continues to be about you-know-what, with the players out there fanning the flames wildly. There's too much nonsense to bother with it all (the quoted sources in the articles directly contradicting each other's stories also makes it difficult) so let's just... *spins wheel*....okay I landed on 'tabloids say Harry's wedding speech talked about his girlfriend Olivia' here goes. Sjksdfjks WHY would you be talking about your girlfriend of three weeks in a speech for your close friends' wedding, OMG, how uncomfortable and inappropriate is that?? Imagine if any of this were real, that Harry ('I'd take my time and make sure a thing was serious before telling people about it', end quote, I mean that's ALSO a stunt quote (oh the layers) but just pointing out that it's contradictory) starts dating his co-worker who just got out of a huge relationship and is also a famous person with presumably an interest in privacy, and immediately the two of you get to work setting up a big reveal to happen right away (even in a weird fantasy world where any of this is real the possibility that JEFF AZOFF'S WEDDING had the paps present for any other reason than to do EXACTLY what they were told is flat impossible- what pap or celeb outlet can afford to be on Jeff's bad list?!) and then he casually writes her into his speech (a guy who's so anxious and shy about public speaking and what to say that he begs people to write speeches for him and practices endlessly) uh huh, sure Jan. There are so many things about this that are ludicrous, but more to the point, none of the things they're saying hold up to scrutiny any better than this. There just isn't any point in taking them that seriously though; Harry is a closeted artist and, just like the many queer artists that came before him who he repeatedly reminds us are his icons, he both lets us know all day every day in a million ways that he's queer, and also plays the industry game and winkingly gives the press their Straight Guy Harry fodder. You don't have to like it, or indeed anything at all in this world, but people do need to accept that whether they like it or not is neither the point nor anyone (including Harry)'s responsibility to respond to or do anything about.

Like I said I can't cover every detail but! I always have a little space for the absurd: today, our best entrant is the possibility that the whole wedding we saw was a sham– fans ask, was this public spectacle Jeff and Glenne's actual wedding? Listen if anyone would be up for it it would be this crew, and if they did stage it I'm sure they had a good laugh! Suspicion has been cast on Glenne's dress (allegedly an untailored 2018 off the rack number), the small guest list (wouldn't they just wait and have a huge event?), and the fact that they invited paps there at all. It would make the no explanation robe pics EVEN FUNNIER though if you imagine that was for our benefit but left totally unadressed (undressed). ANYWAY Don't Worry Darling filming is back in business and Harry was papped some more today, out for a casual not at all pap walk hike with a work associate and multiple items of his own merch (including an unreleased hoodie design.) On the topic of DWD, sometimes a different perspective can be interesting-- for example considering whether Harry is the point of all this at all? Or is he but a bit player in the real DWD publicity drama, an elaborate and very public dramatic reconciliation between Olivia and her ex husband? Either way, he's neither a clueless dupe, a helpless pawn, or anyone's 'boy toy', so please: can we rein in the hand wringing and pointless Olivia bashing a bit?

Let's talk about something else shall we? For example! Liam's setlist, just released for the upcoming LP Show Act 4. Look at that song selection! Fireproof! Strong!! Through The Dark!! More exciting 1D faves! Plus Slow and Home With You off his EP, NICE, singles and more, it looks awesome. The Hugo Man fragrance relaunch is less exciting, featuring the dopiest possible articles full of chat about his skin care routine (oh shucks I'm just manly man, I don't have one at all... *names two products and refers to 'multiple moisturizers'*), trademark accidental candor (“I’m quite tired!”), and of course trying to describe a fragrance, always an entertaining gymnastics (“every time I spray it, it kind of takes me back to being on that rooftop in Berlin”), but also there are manly new pics of Lia.

A new song Niall co-wrote is coming out! The JC Stewart song, Break My Heart, will be out this Fri! Charlie Lightening posted pics from a year ago on the Walls music video set, featuring an intent Louis in the sun (and fashion voter underrated excellent Looks), and Louis commented on Dave Allen's post (“top man!”)-- the famous boxer is offering to help friends through lockdown by facetiming 3or 4 people a day for home workouts, damn, and also aww. That shitty Doncaster secondary school turned out some really sweet dudes, against all odds tbh. With Los Angeles experiencing some of the worst COVID surges we've seen since the beginning of the pandemic, Grammys organizers have elected to postpone the (already limited) ceremony. Originally scheduled for Jan 31 it is now TBA, tentatively for March. Harry's stalker, who menaced him in and near his London home in 2019, is being charged with violating his restraining order by attempting to contact Harry via social media, Global Fund for Women thanked Harry for donating, and HLDaily and other accounts were suspended for posting pap pics, always a risk, but one trick potato Jeff is on the job; HSD is back up and running, cause they can't have a proper stunt season without their most faithful mouthpieces. Niall continues to vote for himself on twitter threads about what to listen to in the New Year.

#1ddiscourseoftheday #everyone loves a powerful successful woman as long as she never ever visibly does anything to try to promote her interests #yes this is about extremely bad takes about Olivia Wilde and what she should or should not do #and what forms of publicity are okay and which are not for her to utilize to promote her film #you don't succeed in Hollywood by refusing to play the game!#Harry and Olivia are adult professionals doing something silly and not particularly time consuming #that has zero impact on their actual personal lives but is extremely effective for achieving their goals #it's just not that serious #hopefully he's tapping her professional relationship with John Frusciante to get Louis an intro lol #everyone freaking out about the reports that he already met her kids sjsjskaj I don't usually believe the Sun but like YES OFC HE DID #IT'S HARRY he probably had their names penciled in for tattooing by day two on set omg I'm sure they LOVE him #they'll be on his book subscription list forever now #but I do have something to say about the way people think buying Harry (or whoever's) merch or tickets or whatever #means they get a say in what that person should do because they're OWED something #and how it relates to the idea that sex workers sell their bodies rather than units of their time #both are wrong. You get what you pay for and nothing more- you get a show or a product but you don't get a controlling interest #in the case of Harry or of a sex worker part of what you purchase is the carefully crafted illusion of friendship and intimacy #but it isn't real #I realize this is terrible example to use because this fandom is virulently puritanical and anti-sex work and sex work adjacent jobs #see: 'eleanor doesn't have a job' 'beards don't work' 'get a real job' etc etc #but guess what that's THE WORST TAKE so I will continue to ignore it and act like I'm talking to people with better takes #until it's true #anyway I was personally favoring Wilde-Styles but that one's for you Amanda #long post

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gaylorlyrics · 3 years

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Cowboy Like Me

Howdy partner! this song is clearly a reference to Taylors roots in country music - but it goes deeper than that. It’s about Karlie, and how both girls have built their careers off of selling the idea of love, karlie through modeling and Taylor through songwriting. Both are super ambitious and focused, playing the game and driving their careers forward, but have rags (ok - not rags, but upper middle class normalcy) to riches stories, which makes them feel like the don’t quite belong in the celeb world.

And the tennis court was covered up

Several people have noticed that this could be a reference to Tennis Court by Lorde. The last time Kaylor was seen together was the below pic at Lorde’s bday. Reading the lyrics to Tennis Court, it almost seems like the same setting as CBM. Lorde’s song explores the dark side of fame, talking about not fitting in and being surrounded by superficial fame. She says “let’s go down to the tennis courts to talk it out” and then we have CBLM that starts in the middle of a sentence with “and”, and takes place at the tennis court, where the cowboys are trying to impress the rich folks, almost as if the songs are sequential.

With some tent-like thing

Here we’re already getting the theme of not belonging somewhere. Taylor doesn’t say canopy - which is what she is referring to and actually would fit both in terms of syllables and rhyme scheme - she says “tent-like thing” which is both dismissive of her surroundings and tells us that maybe she doesn’t quite know the right word for them.

And you asked me to dance

Let’s just take a moment to remember that 1) Karlie is a dancer and 2) kaylor started at vsfs2013 where they danced on stage together like this:

dancer karlie!

But I said, "Dancing is a dangerous game"

This references DWOHT - which is the ultimate Kaylor song and is all about dancing even though its dangerous, like in the lyrics “can we dance through an avalanche?”, “Swaying as the room burned down”, etc.

Oh, I thought This is gonna be one of those things

There’s a song called Just One Of Those Things by Nat Porter that you can listen to here, and it seems like Tay is referencing it here. The song lists great loves (ex. Romeo & Juliet) being cast aside and belittled as “one of those things”. This reminds me of people saying that being gay is a “phase” in order to devalue it. Specifically one line in Just One Of Those Things really makes me think about Kaylor - “If we'd thought a bit, of the end of it When we started painting the town We'd have been aware that our love affair Was too hot, not to cool down”. It expresses how they were so loud while glass closeting and had so much chemistry that they couldn't just tone it down they had to go completely dark in order to keep closeting.

Now I know I'm never gonna love again

In many ways this references the theme of “right where you left me”, Taylor can’t move on because she fell too hard for Karlie and no love will ever compare.

I've got some tricks up my sleeve Takes one to know one You're a cowboy like me

Taylor sees a lot of herself in Karlie. They know how to play the same games in terms of their careers and bearding, but because of this they understand each others vulnerabilities, etc.

Never wanted love Just a fancy car

They weren’t looking for love when they met, they were both just in the place they were because they were trying to advance their careers. However, as Tay has talked about before, the lure or riches and fancy cars isn’t enough to satisfy her. It also references this line in King Of My Heart, where Tay literally says that all the boys aren’t as good as her lover (Karlie) is.

Now I'm waiting by the phone Like I'm sitting in an airport bar You had some tricks up your sleeve Takes one to know one

You're a cowboy like me

also:

Perched in the dark Telling all the rich folks anything they wanna hear Like it could be love I could be the way forward Only if they pay for it

Both Karlie and Taylor have built their careers off of selling the idea of love - Taylor through her music and Karlie through her modeling, especially with Victoria’s Secret. Both of them are capitalizing and cashing in on romance. They play the game of love to be valuable to the record labels, fashion brands, and industry overall, getting the “rich people” in the industry to invest in them and their careers. However, both are caught off guard when they encounter the real thing and actually fall in love.

You're a bandit like me Eyes full of stars

Taylor talks about eyes a lot, but I think this has two meanings. 1 - both of their eyes are full of stars because they are surrounded by other celebs and so they are literally seeing stars all the time. 2 - the more conventional meaning would be that their eyes are bright and beautiful.

It also references two songs that are very much about Karlie: “Starry eyes sparkin’ up my darkest night” in Call It What You Want, and “The stars in your eyes shined brighter in Tupelo” in Dorothea.

Hustling for the good life

Again, Taylor brings attention to the fact that they are both really career focused and trying really hard to be as successful as possible. They don’t have the same type of fallbacks that celebs with famous parents and old money have.

Never thought I'd meet you here It could be love We could be the way forward And I know I'll pay for it

Here Taylor knows that she’ll pay for her relationship with karlie in two ways, 1- she’s paying for it in that by falling in love and pursuing a relationship she’s on the “treacherous” road making her life much more complicated given that she’s choosing not to come out, 2- she is literally paying for beards so she can have a public muse for her relationship songs.

[Chorus]

And the skeletons in both our closets

Plotted hard to fuck this up

Here Tay is talking about closets again. This actually makes me think of two meanings.

1- it makes me think of the “skin and bones” line in treacherous (maybe because I was just talking about that song) and how tay has used that type of language to talk about her and her lover in the past. The skeletons in the closet could be a reference to the past karlie and Taylor being in the closet, when they were both really thin and Taylor was battling her eating disorder. In the past they were plotting so hard to cover their tracks and stay in the closet, which eventually messed everything up for them.

2 - The more obvious interpretation is that the skeletons in the closet are the people who were controlling their careers, who they have now moved away from, like SB2. These people messed things up by keeping them in the closet.

And the old men that I've swindled

Both karlie and tay have had careers that were mostly controlled by men who are older than them - VS CMO Ed razek, SB2, etc. These men thought that they were controlling kaylors careers, but kaylor is individually profiting as well.

Really did believe I was the one

This references The One, the first track on folklore.

And the ladies lunching have their stories about When you passed through town

Karlie has quite the rep for making people fall in love with her quite easily (see the klossanova video that @theprologues made here).

But that was all before I locked it down

Love locked down! for more details check out this post and this one, but basically Karlie posted and image with the caption “love locked down” on March 6, 2016, on the same day Taylor posted “one year down” with the picture of a locket. This was one year after their Vogue cover came out in March 2015. Because of this, it seems like they were celebrating their anniversary some sort. Hence the line “I locked it down”.

Now you hang from my lips Like the Gardens of Babylon

The Hanging Gardens of Babylon is one of the 7 ancient wonders of the world, known as very beautiful and an incredible feat in engineering (beauty + engineering are both things that describe karlie!). However, archeologists are unable to find proof of their location - therefore it’s unclear if the gardens “were an actual construction or a poetic creation”.

With your boots beneath my bed

This is a metaphor for sleeping together and is also referencing cowboy boots.

Forever is the sweetest con

It’s impossible to be with each other forever - when we say forever we know that we will actually be separated by mortality and factors we can’t control. However, Taylor is okay being “conned” with ideas of forever, because it’s understood that they will be with each other as long as possible.

And yet, this also references Hoax - it’s a different way of saying “your faithless love’s the only hoax I believe in”. Leaving us wondering if the love was real or a con.

[Chorus]

#cowboy like me #taylor swift #Karlie Kloss #kaylor #evermore

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aleksadnezz · 3 years

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Sweet Night 5

Jae x Reader

“I’m sorry.” I said while still damping the tissue on his wet hoodie.

“It’s okay. What were you saying again?” He took the tissue from me and he do it on his own.

“Oh I was just gonna ask if you are?” I raised my lanyard to show the keychain to him. His small eyes widen when he saw it.

“How did you now?” He asked. So it’s true??? OMG!!!! My lips formed a big smile. I can’t believe, I’m going to tell it to Ara she would be excited.

“I saw your stuff animals’ collection.” I said cheerfully and pointed his shelves.

He looked at It and returned his eyes on me. He still looked confused so I tried to explain what I mean.

“I actually have a friend, she gave me this and she told me it’s a merch from a kpop group, you have the same so I assumed that you are..” He looked at me waiting me to continue speaking. I can clearly see the nervousness from his eyes. He might think that I’ll tell to other people what I know.

“You are a fan too.”

“Please don’t tell it to other people-“

We spoke at the same time but I heard what he said. He softly laughed and scratched the back of his nape.

“Yeah.. that’s right.. I’m a fan too.” He shyly said.

“Don’t worry I won’t say it.” I said, now I’m hesitating if I’m gonna share this to Ara. I bet she would be happy if I told her that I have a fanboy friend. It’s still weird for me to have a neighbor that is my friend too because I’m not that friendly. What in a bigbang theory is this, except that we’re both introverts and he don’t have a Sheldon.

“Uh have you seen or heard anything about that group?” He suddenly asked. I shook my head.

“Nah. I only know that they’re one of the kpop groups.” I said. I heard him laughed so I looked at him. “Why?”did I said something wrong?

“Nothing. I think they’re more of a kband than a kpop but that’s okay.” He explained. I know nothing about any of that but I like bands for sure I would like them. I almost forgot about the group that Ara said to me earlier, I’ll try to listen to them maybe I would like them too, the thing is I forgot their group name, I’ll just ask Jae if he knows it.

“By the way you know a kpop group that has kids in their name?”

“Stray Kids?”

“Yeah! that’s right, Stray Kids.”

“You like them?”

“Not really I’ll just start listening to them actually.” He nodded. “My friend will bring me to their concert so..”

“Really? That’s awesome.”

“You can come too. I will tell to my friend.” I suggest. Since he’s a fan too might as well invite him to their concert. “Have you attended a concert before? Because I haven’t” I laughed.

“Yeah I’ve been into some concerts, I perform there.” He said the last words under his breath so I didn’t hear it clearly.

“Ha?” I asked but he only shook his head and smiled at me.

“I’ll try to join you with your friend in the concert.”

“Cool!! I’d let you know..” I said. I wonder if he has other socials, but I still don’t know how his name spelled so it’s hard to find him. “Anyway, I think my job here is done so I’m now gonna head out. I have to feed the cat.”

We walked over his opened door. Before I turn and bid him goodbye he spoke.

“How’s Minnie by the way. I haven’t seen her.” He said. Of course you haven’t, you didn’t leave your room for a week.

“She eats a lot and whines a lot. So if you heard her in the middle of the night please don’t knock on my door.” He let out a smiley laugh where I can see his pearly white teeth and the disappearance of his eyes.

“It’s a cute cat. I won’t get mad.” He assures.

“I’ll keep that in my mind.” I raised my finger and pointed my head. I glance at his stretched lips, and that smile. what? I didn’t say that.

Today is Friday and I got off from work extra early. When this happens usually Ara and I would go to mall to window shop or I just accompany her but today she told me that she has something to go to. Also, I didn’t tell Ara about Jae yet, maybe soon if he agrees to come with us to the concert.

I went straight home after my shift so I can go to market. Minnie is running out of cat food supply and I’m running out of food too. I also want to have a chill night where I’d lay on my bed while I watch sum movies. I quickly changed my polo into a shirt and sweats. I wore the glasses that I only wear when I use my computer or phone. I went in front of my mirror to check myself. I stared at my reflection for a long time trying to examine what seems weird. Was it my face? I don’t have dirt on my face and I don’t look tired either. It’s the clothes. I look like Jae. Sweats and glasses, I look comfy as heck.

I don’t want to spend time just to change so I’ll just ignore that I accidentally dressed up as my neighbor, as if that I would bump into him today, I barely see that guy. I carry my tote bag with my phone and wallet in it, and I wore my slides. I left my apartment and locked it.

“You’re going out too?”

I jolted when I heard a voice. Speaking of my neighbor, in fact I don’t even have to turn around just to know who it is. Still, I turned around to face him.

“Yeah, just grocery and you?” Thank g he’s wearing a black hoodie while mine’s gray.

“I need to pick up something.” He said while he’s locking his door.

“Where do you grocery shop?” He asked. I waited him so we can walk together.

“Emart.”

“My way is also there; do you want a ride? I already booked a grab.” He showed me his phone with the said grab. I mean free ride? Of course I do.

“Sure.” The lift opens so we enter. From 15 floor going to ground floor is a long ride so I made myself busy by observing every single thing that I see here inside the lift. When we entered there are already sum people inside, 2 guys and a couple who can’t keep their hands off each other. Not that I’m judging them, but from what I can see, what they’re doing considered PDA already. Hugging, laughing and teasing like there’s no tomorrow.

I don’t know if those guys are annoyed too and just trying to ignore them or maybe it’s just only me. I glanced to Jae to see what he’s doing, looks like he’s not bothered at all. His left hand slipped inside the pocket of his pants; other hand is on his phone.

Another person entered the lift. I moved backwards so she can have space. The couple moves backwards too so they’re now standing beside me, I can even feel her bag nudging my arm but I tried to ignore it. Within a hot minute her arm hit my side causing me to bumped Jae. I looked at the couple as calm as I can possibly can.

“I’m sorry miss.” “sorry miss.” They both said in union.

“It’s okay.” I said calmy and showed my nicest smile. I want my afternoon to be chill and stress free plus I may see them again I want to protect my pure reputation as a good neighbor. Suddenly I felt a hand on my elbow that slowly pulled me closer to him. I felt an electric shock that send shivers all over my body. I stood frozen next to him because of how close we are. I can even smell his perfume, it’s like a mixture of fresh fruity and baby powder. I wonder where he bought it.

He let go of my arm when we reached the ground floor. We walked towards the entrance of the building but I stayed walking behind him. He looked back at me and stopped walking so I can catch up with him. When we got out the building, we can see that there’s a car already waiting. Jae made me get on first and I thought that he would sit beside the driver but he sat next to me.

It’s rush hour already and we we’re caught by traffic. I stared outside the car window like I always do when I commute. There’s time where I’m channeling my main character vibes when I look outside the window. None of us is taking and the sound from the cardio radio playing sum R&B soul songs was the only noise. Jae was busy scrolling through his phone, though I don’t want to bother him but I feel like I should speak.

“So where are you heading to?” I blurted out. I tried not to look at him directly so I stared at the driver’s seat.

“Somewhere near the TBD Company”

“Isn’t that where most celebrity’s hangout or sumthin?” I’ve never been into that area and I know that, that place is one of the richest districts.

“Well not all because I go there all the time.” He said before he turned off his phone and looked at me.

“Have you ever bumped to a celebrity?” I asked. For sure he had at least once, especially when he said that he have been there a lot.

“Just some of them. I’ve always seen Mark Tuan in a coffee shop that I go to, you know him?” Is he kidding? I think he’s the only famous person that I could remember that Ara ever told me. She showed me a video clip of him dancing and I think I forgot to breathe for a sec, plus he got the cutest smile. I must admit that prolly have a thing for people’s smile.

“You mean the very good-looking guy?” I said in awe and he laughed at my reaction. Well, I only said what know is true.

“Yeah, that very good-looking guy.” He said casually as if that he knows him but he’s still laughing. Wait if he seen some celeb then he might have seen his Kpop Idols.

“How about your favorite Kband? Day6?” I’m honestly just guessing, but I believe most of the company’s are located there so assume that they work there. Instead of answering me he let out a fake cough.

I immediately understood what he’s trying to say so I leaned to him and whispered. “Okay I won’t mention in public that you’re a Kpop fan.”I assure him. I find it funny that he’s getting conscious and shy about other people knowing that he’s a fanboy.

“No actually.. yeah alright, I’ll just take that.” Yeah, whatever Jae. I looked outside and saw that we’re almost near the market, I turned to Jae and poked him.

“You can drop me off here.” He nodded.

“Mr. can you pull over to the next street.” Jae said.

“Thank you for the ride Jae.”

“No worries, what time you will be done?”

“I don’t know I may take a while.” I may take a while since I don’t have a grocery list so I’ll prolly have to go to every aisle to remember all the stuff that I needed, a life hack that I learned when I started living on my own.

The driver pulled the car off the road. I turned to Jae before I opened the door.

“Thank you again.” I said and he smiled. I opened the door and got off the car. I waited for them to leave before I enter the market.

1 2 3 4 5

#day6 #day6 jae #jae #eaj park #eaj #jaehyung #day6 fluff #day6 x reader #jae x reader #day6 imagines #sweet night #fanfiction #au

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didsomeonesaydaddydraco · 3 years

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Sweet secret | Tom Felton one shot

Request: yes. @anonymous

Word count: 2,710 words

Pairing: Tom Felton x reader

Note: This one was requested a while ago, I just had troubles writing it. But I really hope you guys like it! Don’t forget that my requests are still open and there’s a prompt list waiting for y’all to check it out. Also, let me know if you’d like to be added to my tag list! Take care babes xx

Being the only child of a rockstar had its own benefits. For example, it was a lot more easier for Y/N to meet her favourite celebrities and make connections with influential people from all type of industries. Having a world wide famous rockstar as a dad meant that she spent most of her time in the limelight, always travelling with him and being his biggest fan from the day she was born. By the age of sixteen, she had already travelled the whole world and successfully used her name to speak up about social issues and help different charities and organisations. She had never stopped talking about the importance of acceptance, equality, support and love. She lived her life like that. She didn’t care who you were, where you came from, as long as you didn’t hurt the ones she loved, she loved you and supported you. That was what she saw from her parents, and she was proud of her family being one of those celebrity families who never let fame get in their heads and go crazy over their net worth. They lived a humble life, and shared their love with the world.

But of course that lifestyle came with the content rumours and paparazzi chasing after them in the street. They tried to capture an awkward moment that could be laughed at, a bad hair day that could be the reason to judge, but what they wanted most, is to capture her with someone from the opposite sex. She always kept her love life private, hardly sharing any information about who she was seeing or who she was in a relationship with. She was happy that they could keep their relationship a sweet little secret for almost six months, and enjoy the privacy and intimacy of their bubble. It was until one day a fan of Tom successfully took a picture of them, being in the same car, driving around Los Angeles.

She met Tom through a mutual friend, who was aware of their silly little platonic crush on each other and knowing Y/N and Tom, she thought they could be a power couple. So when she learnt that both of them were going in to in LA for weeks, she didn’t hesitate to throw a summer party in her beach house and invite both of them. She kept it as a secret, didn’t want them to think they are being forced into something that they didn’t want in the first place. Y/BSF/N knew Y/N just recently got out of a terrible relationship and she was a little bit afraid to start something knew, fearing that the new guy would be the same as the previous one. And she knew that Tom, no matter how many times he said and acted like he wasn’t, was lonely and wanted to finally find someone who he could share his life with. She knew she had nothing to worry about, because the second they were introduced, they just immediately hit it off and spent the whole afternoon and night by each other’s side, talking about movies, music, travel, dreams and goals, and when the cocktails finally kicked in, they weren’t shy to shamelessly flirt with each other. Tom was confident about their mutual sympathy and felt something that he hadn’t felt in a very long time, and two days later, he asked her out of their first official date. He was a real gentleman. He picked Y/N up at her flat, brought a huge bouquet of white roses to her and treated her like a queen the whole night. He arranged a candlelight picnic dinner on the beach, far from the popular parts, so nobody could ruin their first date. They fed each other with fruits and cuddled while they watched the stars. It was nothing crazy, nothing fancy and extravagant. Money wasn’t in focus, but they were. That night was all about them. And when the night eventually had to end, Tom walked her to the door and sweetly kissed Y/N. Ever since then, the couple couldn’t imagine their days without at least FaceTiming each other. They were happy and crazily in love, of course they wanted to keep that a secret as long as they could , not wanting the media to ruin in for them. But life didn’t work like that. Paparazzi had no mercy and they were paid to take preferably the highest quality pictures of the top celebs and their close family. And social media users wanted something they could talk about, because that was the main priority for most people nowadays. Stalking the subject of their obsession and use the protection of anonymity of social media to hate and judge other people.

“Have you seen the pictures?” Y/N asked Tom when she finally found him chilling by the pool in his backyard. It was a rather hot day in LA, and he had a few days break from shooting his next movie, he wanted to get the best out of his little break and spend every single minute with his lady “My dad just sent me them” she gave her phone to Tom, so he could check out the short article with the attached photos. It was from a few days ago, when they went to grocery shopping together. They were just leaving the parking lot, and it was visible that Tom was holding up their interwind hands to his lips to kiss on her knuckles. Another picture of them showed how Tom opened the car door for Y/N, and as she was getting in the vehicle, he playfully patted her butt. He quickly clicked on the link to see the full article. It was really short, probably because the journalist didn’t have any solid evidence or information about their romance.

“What can I say? I just love your ass” Tom handed back her phone and chuckled at her expression “Darling, stop worrying. A fan sent those pictures to TMZ, so what? They have no evidence that we’re dating” he put his hand of her calf and looked up at her girlfriend. He knew they couldn’t keep their relationship a secret forever. No matter how much Tom liked the excitement of sneaking around and having privacy, he wanted to show the world how beautiful, amazing and perfect his girlfriend was “This shall too pass, just like any other rumour that is left without a word.”

“Alright” Y/N sighed and decided to ignore the article, the photos, the comments and the mentions. Tom was right. This whole thing will be long forgotten in a couple of days, if neither of them say anything about it. In that case, the media couldn’t blow it up “I just hate the media and the drama it causes every time”

“I know” he smiled at her sweetly, not liking the frown on her face from annoyance and worry “So will you finally join me in the pool or do I have to throw you in it again?” Y/N laughed and put her phone down on the deck chair. She winked at Tom and take of the think summer dress she was wearing to reveal Tom’s favourite swimsuit, a white one-piece with a deep V-cut. He whistled at her as she was walking down the few steps of the pool and swam up to him “You just made this already hot day way hotter, baby” he pulled her close, kissing her passionately and making her forget all about that article.

2 months later -

Having a boyfriend who was constantly traveling and filming wasn’t making a relationship smooth, and if you add a girlfriend who was working on her own career just as hard, then you could easily how Tom and Y/N’s relationship was. But they knew what they wanted and they did everything to make it work, even if they were in two different parts of the country. They called each other every time they had the chance, made sure to send a supporting message to the other, letting them know they were proud of their achievements in life, and of course memes. Tom was a huge fan of memes, and he liked to spam Y/N with them, especially with the Harry Potter ones. Y/N lived for the smile on Tom’s face and she knew how much he loved surprises, so when she could finally take a week off from work, her first thing was to book a flight to the city Tom was currently at. The smile on his face and how excited and happy he was when he saw his girlfriend after almost two months of only being able to see her through his phone was worth anything to Y/N.

“I missed you so much, baby” Tom said in between kisses, not letting go of the laughing girl in his arms “I was getting rather lonely without you” his was got an octave deeper and the familiar flame of lust and love appeared in his ocean blue eyes. Slowly, his lips made their way down to her neck from her lips, kissing along her jawline, holding her closer than ever.

“Mhm, as much as I want this” Y/N pulled away and looked up at Tom, who was pouting like a little boy who’s favourite toy was taken away. It was party true, one of his new favourite things to do was kissing Y/N whenever he had the chance “You have to go live in a less than 5 minutes. You promised a Harry Potter watch party to your babies, and I don’t want you to disappoint them” she kissed his nose and forced his arms off of her waist. Tom knew he couldn’t disappoint them, and he didn’t want to, but he still groaned as he went to make sure everything was okay with the internet connection and the light ring. Y/N watched how Tom settled with his guitar and a cup of tea, already smiling that she could watch her boyfriend interacting with his fans.

“I’ll just sing a little in the meantime” Tom said to Y/N, who was packing out of her suitcase, and changing into one of Tom’s Teddy Fresh hoodies. They were the most comfortable hoodies she had ever worn, and it was just a pleasing addition that they always smelled like Tom. She kept on packing and tidying up the mess Tom usually leaves in his room in the morning, and listened to his smoothing voice. She always loved when Tom was singing. I didn’t matter if it was a song from another artist, one that he wrote or just an improvised nonsense about something that caught his attention in that very second. She loved to see him happy, and singing made him happy.

Tom finally started his Instagram live and was singing one of his old songs. One that was very dear to both of them, because he sang that song on their one month anniversary and told her he was in love with her.

“I was in the right place, at the right time, that day we spent together” Tom kept looking at her behind his phone, his smile getting bigger when she blew him a kiss “There’s no where else I’d have put myself, or to share the day with anyone else” he finished the song and greeted his fans who were already sending hundreds of heart emojis and cute little love confession to him in the comment section. Y/N layed down on the bed, with her phone in her hands and read the comments, screenshooting a few cute ones to save them for later.

“Alright my little wizards and witches” Tom said “Shall we continue our magical journey to the one and only Hogwarts?” His voice was filled with excitement, he hadn’t seen any of the movies in so long, he really wanted to share this experience with those people who had such a huge impact in his career as an actor. Little did they know, the fans saw the secret glances and how Tom blushed at the sigh of his girlfriend taking off his hoodie, staying in only her shorts and a tank top. Even after all these months, he still thought of her as a goddess. The fans had been suspecting that Tom had someone special in his life. They caught on his glow, and how his smile became brighter. He always sang love songs during his lives and left little Easter eggs in his Instagram stories, or in his captions. They were happy to see him being in love, they were only waiting to finally be able to see who was the reason of Tom’s behaviour.

“Questions time!” He announce after the 11 minutes of the movie ended. He grabbed his guitar again and started playing spontaneously on the strings, creating a beautiful melody. It was the moment, when Y/N realised her phone was on 5%, and her charger was somewhere behind Tom. She knew it would have been suspicious, if he just grabbed it and handed it her, so she decided to go and grab it herself. From where she was laying, it looked like her charges was out of the frame, and nobody would see her. She tiptoed to the charger and made sure not to bump into anything that could alert the fans. It was their time with Tom, and she didn’t want to interrupt their little date.

“God, you’re so beautiful” Tom blurted out when he saw her behind him, grabbing her charger from the coffee table. As soon as the words left his mouth, they both froze. Y/N realised she was in the frame, being very much visible. She looked at her boyfriend with a socked expression, not being sure what to do next. Stay or go? Say something or stay silent? Wave or smile? As for Tom, he didn’t mind that she accidentally walked into the live. He wanted to tell the world for a while now about their relationship. He was tired of not being able to share his happiness with his fans and hiding their love. It was nothing wrong about it. Love, in any kind of form, should have been celebrated in a daily basis. And that was what he wanted.

“I guess it’s time to finally introduce you to my other family, baby” Tom put down his guitar and reached out to her hand, pulling her completely in the frame. He sat her on his lap and hugged her by the waist “Ladies and gentlemen, please, welcome the woman who has being making me the happiest man alive in the last six and a half months” he looked at her the way every girl wants to be looked at. If anyone would have question the love they had, they only had to watch how they were looking at each other. Love, adoration, passion and devotion. It was all in one single look “Sorry for keeping this a sweet little secret for so long, but I just wanted to have her for myself as long as I could” he chuckled and kissed the blushing cheek of his girlfriend. Y/N was still in a little bit of shock. This definitely wasn’t the way she wanted to announce their romance to the world, but she was revealed deep down. She could finally show her love and support freely.

“Don’t worry, I’ll make sure Tom has many dates with you guys on Instagram” winked to the camera and refused to look at the comments. She was floating in happiness, she didn’t want the haters to ruin it for her.

“I’m so damn lucky” Tom whispered and grabbed her face to give her a quick but sweet kiss on the lips. Nobody could stop him from posting about his girlfriend and what they had. He was finally able to show off, and make sure everyone saw her as she was. Not Tom Felton’s girlfriend, not the daughter of Y/F/N, but as Y/N Y/L/N. He was proud to have you, and planned to keep it that way till the rest of his life.

#tom felton #Tom Felton one shot #Tom Felton x reader #Tom Felton fluff #Draco Malfoy imagines #Draco Malfoy one shot #Tom Felton imagines #request #Tom Felton requests

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balenciagastones · 3 years

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hi im kinda new to this can you pls explain to me why everybody hates lauryn? all i know is she wants kyle to be a dad and he isn't

here we go! putting this under the cut so i don’t flood people’s dash who don’t care <3

okay so bit of backstory first cos im gonna try and do this in chronological order, she is chloe goodman’s sister and she used to go out with marcus rashford’s brother, apart from that she was pretty much a nobody. i also dk how much you know about kyle but basically he’s been with annie for agessss and they have 3 sons together. at the start of 2020 it came out that lauryn was pregnant with a mystery england footballer’s baby and it was kept a secret who it was for ages and just said that they were in a whirlwind romance and the baby was a miracle because she has endometriosis and pos meaning she would struggle to conceive naturally. it was outed cos of pap photos that have been said were staged by her, pretty much the whole of this has been staged by her tbh but it was later announced that the baby daddy was kyle walker and all hell broke loose tbh.

all throughout her pregnancy and a bit after the baby was born she wouldn’t reveal the gender but constantly baited it and hyped it up and drew a lot of attention to the baby’s gender (a little bit of backstory to this is that annie obviously has 3 boys as we said before but she always always wanted a girl and has always been v public with that fact, she also had a miscarriage which wasn’t talked about until after the baby was born but hindsight makes this whole gender situation worse but back to the story). her sister was also pregnant at the same time as her and was public saying she was having a girl so lauryn used to post stories with girls’ baby clothes and pink things in basically to just bait she was having a girl when she knew all along it was a boy, there’s literally no reason for this apart from her wanting to spite annie and imply that she was having a girl baby with the man she loved to hurt her for no reason.

cut forward to when the baby is born and she starts to promote these bracelets which have different ones for different situations, so she has one for anxiety, one for sleep, one for fertility (you can see where this is going) and there’s a few points with these scam bracelets. first off she came out and said she was wearing one at the time she slept with kyle so this baby perhaps wasn’t so much an accident on her part as she was manifesting fertility and that she’d become pregnant basically, take from that what you will but it was clearly her intention to fall pregnant with his baby when she knew he was with another woman long term and had 3 little boys with her. and the second part to it is just what an absolute scam those bracelets are, they’re not cheap and they target vulnerable groups of people and profit off their struggles which is obviously so immoral and disgusting when a fuckin bead bracelet clearly can’t make you fertile or make you sleep better or any of this shit, it’s taking advantage of people in desperate need and taking money from vulnerable people, it’s awful.

so now the baby is born and she’s said it’s a boy but hasn’t announced the name and allegedly didn’t pick the name until he was 4 months old or something, but she decides that they need a name to call him so decide to say his name is junior. now you can immediately see the issue with this, she’s been banging on for the whole of her pregnancy that she’s a single mother and he’s not involved blah blah blah then calls him junior, which ofc people asked if the name was kyle junior and she as much as said it was and started referring to him as junior until she posted a video of the baby holding a necklace that said KW. obviously calling your baby junior implies that they have the dad’s name and are the jr version of the dad so when she posted the KW necklace alongside a caption that said ‘for those asking why it doesn’t say JW, KW are his true initials’ ofc everybody assumed his name was kyle walker junior, and she let this go on for 6 MONTHS. she wore this necklace that says KW everywhere it’s lit in all of her instagram photos, it literally came across as a trophy just shouting that she got knocked up by kyle walker and just using it as a constant reminder to anyone and everyone that her baby was half famous footballer kyle walkers regardless of whether he was involved or not, baring in mind in the same breath she’s continuing to go on about how she’s a single mother and doing it all on her own. her saying she’s doing it all on her own is a load of shit too because her family helps her constantly and she always has someone looking after him with her and she lives in a big fancy house so she’s putting across she’s struggling and a single mother out on her own but that’s not the truth.

she also kept giving questionable parenting advice out on her story and endorsing products and methods that weren’t the most effective and weren’t recommended, even a blanket method that im sure was said to be harmful and she’s promoted many products that she shouldn’t have just in the name of money and fame and clout, she isn’t qualified to be giving out parenting advice to the scale she is and i understand she’s gotten experience but she talks like she’s a professional and holds q&as giving advice she’s not qualified to give and considering she promotes half dodgy products, it’s not the best situation. two more random things before we’re caught up to what’s happened today, she put the baby in a city jersey then the next week put him in a liverpool jersey just to spite kyle LMAO and they all went on holiday to dubai and im pretty sure paparazzi isnt allowed in dubai that’s why all the celebs go there but she was papped there so she must’ve set that up too lmaoooooo. but now we’re at today.

basically it started by kyle posting a picture of his own personal football boots that he played in for the final match of the season im sure, and he had printed on the names and dates of birth of all 3 kids he had with annie, and as you can quite imagine, lauryn wasn’t very happy with this. so she went straight on her stories preaching how horrific it was that he didn’t include kairo’s name on his boots and he’s done nothing but he cute and innocent and kyle was ‘bullying’ his own son which is obvs the wrong word to use but she’s daft and has been throwing around the word bullying, and talking about how she won’t let their son be left out, baring in mind she constantly says how she’s a single mother and prides herself on that she doesn’t have him involved and that he’s a horrible person etc etc. so all of her little minions who love her started replying to her story saying he was disgusting blah blah blah and decided as a collective with her encouragement to spam his page with kairo’s name and demand justice for kairo or something so after he got a few comments he turned the comments off from the post about the boots so they went to his first post before the boots which was a memorial post for the victims of the manchester arena attack. fully grown women commenting on a memorial post for such a tragic event demanding to know where kairos name was or spamming his name letter by letter, first off it’s just batshit crazy but second off how disrespectful?? from lauryn as well to encourage it and think of nobody but herself and want the attention because realistically it wasn’t gonna achieve anything but slightly irk him that he had to turn the comments off.

she’s also been encouraging people to email puma themselves and demand to know why they did it as if they had any input on what kyle had on his personal boots, puma probably had no idea about any of this and certainly didn’t do it on purpose to cause a storm so there’s no reason for them to be complaining to puma. she posted a list of what she wanted to happen including kyles post to be removed, the boots to be pulled (i don’t think she realises they were just personal boots for kyle and not a product for the general public to buy), a public apology to kairo and a public statement to be put out, none of which would solve the greater situation or help the situation that’s already been caused.

she posted saying kyle was bullying the baby and mentally abusing him which is disgusting to be throwing around when that’s not the case at all cos in reality kyles just trying to mend his relationships with annie and his family while keeping lauryn and the baby out of it like she keeps going on about, but then when it comes down to it she uses his surname, posts about it 24/7, wants his name on his boots, uses him for clout, walks around with a KW necklace on etc etc etc. most recently she’s created a petition to get pumas attention to do all of what i listed before and i think about 600 people have signed it so far.

i think that’s all although im sure anons will chip in if ive missed anything, that’s if anybody’s actually read this far 😭 so yes, more than you bargained for probably anon! story time with han! xx

#anon

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lonely-teddy-bear · 4 years

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Celebrity Crush ➳ Rudy Pankow

Request: hi!! can i request a fic where reader is a singer and rudy is her celeb crush (she’s a few years younger) and like nobody knows but then she finds out he has a crush on her and it’s like fluffy

A/N: idk if it’s enough fluff but I liked writing this one. But I hope you all like it!! It’s my first Rudy imagine so if you want more or want JJ let me know! I’m taking requests for Rudy/JJ, Rafe/Drew, and Harry Styles. :)

~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_

“Thank you Ralph, for this gig.” You smiled towards the owner of the club who was an old friend of your parents.

He scuffed and waved it off, “It’s no problem, I'm glad you were in town because the band that always plays here got a signing and well he headed off.” You smiled at him. You understood the situation because you also used to play at his club since you were young and you were discovered there along with the rest of your band mates.

“Well they will come back. I mean look at me, in the middle of a tour and I had time for you. You are the reason I got discovered and given a chance.” He gave me a nod.

“Yeah you are right. When you have more time come by more, people miss seeing you.”

“I’ll try once the tour is over.” He gave you a smile and sent you off to the backstage telling you your time was almost up and to start setting up.

Your band consisted of three other members and with you there were four in total, making you the lead singer. Your bandmates were given the opportunity to sing but they would just shake their head and stick to what they loved and enjoyed doing.

Once everyone was done doing their part on setting up you started to do soundcheck to make sure everything was set and ready. While you were talking with your bandmates the drummer gave you a nod signaling you to look towards the crowd. You looked at him with furrowed eyebrows and turned around and looked around the crowd to see who she was pointing at.

“Rudy is here.” You turned around to look at your drummer whe you heard her say your celebrity crush name.

“What?”

“Rudy Pankow is here. Don’t you see him?” You turned around again and looked at the crowd as best as you could with the lights on your face. Sure enough he was here, he was by the bar, leaning and looking towards you. You looked away and your eyes widened.

You were a fan of him and you might even have a crush on him and seeing him in the same club that you were about to perform at made you feel nervous, You have never been a nervous person when it came to performing in front of people, you had gotten used to it but to see someone you had a crush on and who was famous made you feel like you were about to throw up your lunch.

“Calm down y/n. Just focus on the music and if you want i’ll turn the lights more so you can’t see him.” All you could do was nod at her. Your bandmates knew about your silly crush on Rudy and how obsessed you were with him and just like any other friends they would tease you about him and would always joke about the chances of you meeting him. The lights got brighter which made the audience nonexistent which calmed your nerves just a little bit but you couldn’t help but to keep thinking on how Rudy was going to be looking at you and hearing you sing.

Once you started playing you lost track of time and forgot about where you were and who was watching you. You focused on your singing and the guitar you would pick up on certain songs. You all had kept the track list you were performing in your tour so the time went real fast. Before you knew it you were in your ten minute break which gave you time to freshen up and get something to drink. The rest of the band stayed backstage and just sipped on the waters they had but you had drunk the bottle throughout the songs when you had the chance.

Walking down towards the floor you would bump into people and some people would just stop you to tell you how good you were. As much as you wanted to stay and talk you had to tell them that you were on break but they could catch you after the end of the show in which they understood. You finally had made it to the bar and took a seat, letting out a sigh when feeling a chair under you. You leaned on the bar and placed your head on your hands and closing your eyes.

“Want water or something else?” You heard Ralph and without looking up you answered him.

“Give me a lemonade please,” you didn’t have to look up to see him smile at you. You used to drink lemonade all the time when you played in the club, you would drink it before, on break and after you were done and just hanging out.

“Lemonade? I would have guessed you would get something with vodka or rum,” your breathing stopped and you felt your body tensed up. You couldn’t believe your hears but then again you were just on stage with all the music so maybe you were hearing wrong but nonetheless you looked up at the person that spoke to you. Your eyes widened when you saw who had spoken and who the voice belonged to.

“Omg, Rudy,” you wanted to facepalm yourself, you had said his name as if he was a long time friend who you haven’t seen in years. He smiled at you when he noticed your blushing face. He didn’t know if it was from being on stage or because he was there.

He raised his brows at you as if waiting for your response. “Oh right, um, I don’t really drink, not because I don’t like it, it’s more because I can’t drink alcohol.” He looked at you in question.

“Why not? Do you get drunk fast?” He gave you a teasing smirk and before you could answer Ralph appeared with your lemonade and placed it in front of you and then looked at Rudy.

“No, it’s because she’s 19,” with that he walked away. You looked at Rudy and saw his eyes wide and saw his cheeks getting red.

“Oh my, I have a crush on a 19-year-old,” You were taken back at what he said. He might have mumbled it to himself and you're sure he didn’t notice what he said but you couldn’t help but to question him.

“Wait what did you say?” He looked up at you and his eyes got wider.

“Please tell me you didn’t hear that,” You couldn’t help but to smile. You felt as if you were dreaming.

“I heard you but don’t worry I may also have a crush on you,” you looked away from him for a second and then looked back at him to see him staring at you.

“You do?” You gave him a nod. “Yeah, my friends think it’s silly but what can I say you know?” he nodded in agreement.

“Yeah I get you, the guys always joke about my crush on you when I play your songs.” He plays my songs around his friends? You wondered. You were about to speak but was interrupted by Ralph, “Your break is over, they need you on the stage,” You gave him a nod and thanked him for letting me know. You looked back at Rudy and saw him already looking at me, his face became red when he realised that you caught him looking at you.

“Well I got to go, it was nice talking to you, um, maybe you want to get drinks after I finish here? Or go somewhere?” He quickly nodded.

“Oh yeah for sure. I would love that. I’ll be waiting here for you. Have fun on the rest of the show.” You smiled at him and looked away. You made your way to the back and once you were with your teammates you let out a scream of excitement.

They looked at you as if you were crazy, “what happened?”

“I’m having drinks with Rudy! And I might go out with him after the gig,” they all looked surprised and gave you smiles. “Well good for you then, you finally got to meet your celebrity crush uh.” You slowly nodded, you really did.

Throughout the show you tried looking for Rudy in the crowd but the lights were too bright for you to find him, You should have brought them down a little bit but you thought it was good that you couldn’t see him because then you wouldn’t be focusing on the song, you would have been just looking at him.

By the end of the set list you thanked everyone for coming and thanked Ralph for everything he has done for them. When you got off and headed towards the bar you saw the blonde waiting for you in the same spot, looking at you with a smile. You couldn’t help but to smile back at him.

“Hey,” you smiled shyly at him. “Hey. You were great. I actually can’t believe I saw you and your band live. It’s been my dream to see you live.” You cocked your head to the side.

“Really?”

He nodded.

“Yeah. I’ve listened to your music since your first ep.” That made your heart swell up. You couldn’t believe your celebrity crush liked your music and had a crush on you.

“Well how about I give you a pair of tickets to one of my concerts and you take me out for dinner?” You could feel the nerves roaming through your body, waiting for his answer.

“I like the way you think, Y/n.”

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Hope you liked it! Xx

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