#I wasn't sure I wanted to draw baby Stans

[ianthedebonair]

I was thinking about Damien being very oblivion npc-pilled when he first got out of Farm, because of the soup comic... do you have any baby Damien headcanons? 🥹✨

Im sorry, this lowkey turned out to be early chargestep headcanon because i'm very normal about their pre-hb dynamic 😫 Incoherent rambling under the cut

Damien initially wore an all black attire with protective sports gear and covered his face with a balaclava and a hockey mask with a bat for his weapon. In his "debut", he wanted to stop a man from mugging a civilian walking through a back alley. He didn't want to draw too much attention so he silently creeped behind while the robber accosts the victim. Unfortunately, the victim saw him and screamed in terror, prompting the man to look behind and got scared-shitless, too. They both ended up running away for their lives. Meanwhile, Damien was like, "🧍‍♂️I'm not sure that's how it's supposed to end, but problem solved, I guess...? 🧍‍♂️."

After that, he read more about current heroes and decided to wear Rangers merch with his gear and noticed that people now reacted more positively towards him.

Now, when the Marshal caught wind of a too-competent, mysterious back-alley vigilante, he wanted to reach out and establish connections... only to find out that the vigilante is -- he assumed, based on the outfit Damien wore that day -- a Charge stan.

In the first few attempts of reaching out, Damien was initially skittish as heck (especially with Ricardo's static), but he eventually relented for a talk.

Ricardo thought Damien was too starstruck to hold a conversation so he laid out his Charm™️ to get him to talk and hoped to glean some useful info, but it just completely bounced off him. It was then when Ricardo surmised that maaaybe Damien wasn't a fan, but that got him more curious about his character. Still, he found it refreshing to find someone unaffected by his presence, so he continued the laid back, vaguely flirty banter because it's fun and he wanted to see if he could elicit a reaction from the mystery vigilante. Damien didn't mind as he enjoyed having someone to talk to and practice actual conversations with. He even ended up matching Ricardo's snark (minus the flirting part, because he didn't understand that... yet).

After teaming up a few times, Ricardo asks about Damien's alias

Ricardo: So, what do you even call yourself? Unless you want "Vigilante Wearing Rangers Merch" to stick, which isn't really good for PR. Damien: Shit. I never thought about needing a name. Gotta think fast *looks around*

Damien: Uhh... Streetwatch? Ricardo: Nice try, but you just got that from signages behind me, didn't you? *laughs and pats Damien's shoulder* Don't worry we'll workshop it.

They eventually settled with Sidestep because it matched his fighting style and also served as an inside joke from that conversation.

This video is very early Damien-coded to me, too. (Also happening in Ric's kitchen).

He "matured" a lot within the year that he got introduced to Themmy and rest of the Rangers because there were actual minds to read and imitate learn from, but the wit he observed from Ricardo made a big impression on his own personality. The feelings and yearning came at him (like a truck) in the time between fighting Psychopathor and allying with the Rangers but that requires a separate rambling, so I digress. After mastering the art of sarcasm, he was able to mask a lot his genuine oblivious moments as jokes and easily deflect questions he doesn't want to answer.

OH, he also does the head tilt thing whenever he encounters something new/he doesn't fully understand! That's his major tell. I'm a big fan of that mannerism 💯😭

[thyandrawrites]

how would you rate each of hawks' civilian outfits? 👀

Asks that test your memory djkdjfs I think I got most of his civilian outfits (excluding any that might've appeared in the spinoffs because I don't follow those)

So... I am a fashion disaster too irl so this will be mostly lighthearted teasing. Don't take me too seriously. Fashion can be very personal, but this is Hawks and my blog is not a bully-Hawks-free zone, so.

Here's my ranking from best to worst fit. I could've done it the other way around but what's the fun in that, right? 😂

7.

The "someone vetoed the actual suit I wanted to wear and we all must thank them for it" look

Alright don't judge me. It's very basic formal wear and all black is an easy choice for a man, but it does flatter him. I also like the red accents of the accessories. Another obvious choice to complement his wings, but. No one said I had good standards. Now if only he rolled up those sleeves. Smh

6.

The "if you don't look too closely you might miss all the trauma and backstabbing and think I'm a normal twenty-something" look

Ok full disclosure: I like bolero jackets. That's all. Fhhdhdhd

Iirc the anime had him wear his hero costume in this scene and that's a shame because this is probably the only time Hawks dressed his age. It's all very sleek and looks put together without much of an effort, and it looks good on him even if the color-coordination is very basic. But the casual look of the watch, headphones and sneakers combo adds a certain fuckboy touch to the fit. Which is so inexplicably funny because it's Hawks. Bxhdhdj but oh well. Whatever works, works

5.

The "I only look good because someone put shiny things on me" look

I was gonna put this more on top before realizing that without the jewelry he looks like he's on his way to the grocery store. That was probably by design since it's a modeling shot. I assume he was asked to dress plainly not to draw attention away from the advertised products, so I'll give him a pass.

But all that shiny metal looks amazing on him. I am a Dabi stan why are you surprised I like shiny things

4.

The "must be fashionable while committing retconned murder" look

I know what you're thinking. It's gaudy. I won't argue against that. But depending on its colors, the paisley jacket could've been a Look. Too bad Bones was a coward and cut it. I guess the year 2021 wasn't ready for Hawks' fashion choices

3.

The "oh no the postman was here and caught me in my pajamas" look

This one isn't even bad. It's just. Plain. Baby pls, you have a ton of money. At least put some color in your wardrobe

2.

The "all the money in my bank account can't buy common sense" look

Now we're actually getting into Hawks' peculiar fashion sense. I know there's a name for those big sneakers but he must like them because that's the second time we see him wear them.

What I find amusing about this is that all of those clothes kinda clash with each other. There's a lot going on with his torso in particular. He's wearing geometric patterns on his shirt, which would be eye-catching on its own, but then he trew on a cross between a travel jacket and... Skater-like streetwear, almost? Idk, I don't know the first thing about fashion but when I first saw this ensemble my eyes didn't know where to look lol

Also, those visors. They're not his usual work ones. He definitely put them on as an accessory. I guess he has a brand. Nerd.

1.

The "my strategy on my days off is to dress so ugly people don't look me in the eyes and thus can't ask me to work" look

Okay, I cheated. Pretty sure this outfit is from one of the movies, but I couldn't not include it. I had to leave you on an outfit that deals some kind of psychic damage, lest you thought my more moderate opinions hinted towards me thinking this man can dress himself

Anyway, this was fun. Thank you for the ask!

[greypetrel]

Hello! 🌙✨ Chiedo anch'io un po' un mix: Eowyn e Cassandra 👀

OMG you asked the two crushes!

Thank you *evil laugh*

Eowyn:

First impression: I was blown out as a child. Beside the look and the sleeves... Oh my god I remember the day I saw her, I wanted to be her so bad and dress like her and the JOY when she and Faramir, the other besties kissed! They were my first OTP and I remember I was so happy and started drawing stuff.

Impression now: Freaking epic. I reconsidered a little her crush over Aragorn as No lady YOU'RE A BABY LEAVE THE DILF ALONE. Still, she's one of the characters I like the most ever and the one I'll slam upon everyone uncautious enough to tell me to my face that Tolkien didn't know how to write women or was a maschilist. He was a man of his time, sure. Maschilist? No I don't think so. She's a complex character struggling with her place in the world and in a world that tries to define her. She is good and honourable... But still will carve her path with her bare hands if she must. And she did, and in the end did a lot, she fought to find the place she wanted and it paid off. Had Tolkien really been a maschilist, she wouldn't have slain the Witch King. In the end she chooses to settle down, yes, but on her own terms. At least, I read it like this. It's not staying because she's a woman and that's her place, it's staying because she tasted heroism, she did her part, the war is over and it still wasn't enough. But maybe finding people that understand her and don't try to tie her up... Maybe that's enough. "Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose".

Favorite moment: "I am no man." Hands down the most epic moment in the saga can't beat that. Slay, girl.

Idea for a story: Seriously, ANYTHING with her. More of her relationship with Eomer and Theodred maybe? More Edoras pre-war and how Wormtongue crept his way in? I love Rohan as a concept so really anything with that I'll be down for.

Unpopular opinion: Is there an unpopular opinion of. I don't think there is, we're all Eowyn stans here are we. I'll maybe say that Eomer had an equal crush over Aragorn and BOTH of them were pining hard. ("Aragorn senpai look at me ridigin into battle! :D" cit. book!Eomer)(quoted as unpopular because I never saw it around that much)

Favorite relationship: *looks above* She and Faramir dealing with coping with failed expectations (their own or others') and finding softness together. Also every interactions she has with Theoden is gold, and her relationship with Merry is as well! Besties.

Favorite headcanon: This fic I read from @scyllas-revenge lives in my head rent free and it's just... The ultimate fluff.

Cassandra:

First impression: "Oh damn this dude got himself into serious troubles, I wouldn't go against that woman. Pretty tho.". I tried to romance her at first in Inquisition and was very sad when she turned Aisling down. (you can all mock her and her Templar kink, yes.)

Impression now: I love Cassandra and her flaws and contradictions. I love that she's basically made of granite, you won't move her with cannons... and yet, she's there, ready to think twice and change her mind accordingly. She's multi-faceted and honestly one of the funniest characters in Inquisition. I love strong women that have a soft side and she has definitely one.

Favorite moment: The cutscene in Trespasser. Years pass and yet she'll still be gullible to a good romance story told by her very favourite author.

Idea for a story: A modern AU where she is the one and only author writing in the Swords & Shields fandom. Varric reads every single one of her stories, at first it was to mock her and her inability to recognise a trash book, then he felt affectionate to this utter devotion. A Misery AU with her an Varric. (...thinking about it better, DA2 is really a Misery fantasy AU...) Beside that, something exploring the aftermath of her nasty comments over Elven religion if you bring her along in one specific mission. An elf inquisitor facing her on that and discussing it. I wrote part of this months ago oops.

Unpopular opinion: She'd make the worst Divine of the three and would suffer greatly in the role.

Favorite relationship: She and Varric. In any sauce and way and in tutti i luoghi e tutti i laghi.

Favorite headcanon: She's Varric and Hawke number 1 fangirl, she read the Tale of the Champion and begged to be sent to interrogate them. When she meets Hawke, she's internally screaming and won't wash the hand Hawke shook for the whole day.

[tea-with-evan-and-me]

The thing is, it really isn't about whether Evan is ok with it or not, it's about a person's morals. People pleaser or not, where do you draw the line? If I knew my friend was abusing little puppies I would certainly stop being friends with them (If i am not coerced into tolerating it). Emma might not have abused little puppies, she *only* abused her signifact other for 5-7 years and If that's something you can look past at because it was a long time ago or it isn't worth breaking a friendship over because it's inconvenient for you, then you have highly questionable morals. Especially when that signifacnt other is one of your friends. Same goes for Sarah. Be a people pleaser all you want. But publically supporting a notorious abuser is still a choice. And If I were Evan I would ditch every single one of those hypocrites and read books on self love and trauma so I stop being a magnet to these weirdos

let's be honest, she's a nepobaby, she's influential in the business because of her family. just like you said, it's not convenient to them to not be in good terms with her. that's how hollywood works, its competitive and you have to anything to keep up with it

(gonna change the subject a little bit): that might even be one of the reason why evan didn't press charges (completely speculating rn) He was probably instructed not to do it. if we take a look at the news around that time he was always referred as "emma roberts' boyfriend". he was a nobody compared to her, if he ever did something his career would be over, not hers. we can see that even now in angelica's situation: she only opened up about it because she was gonna leave the business and emma is still being worshiped and has her image almost intact.

(back to the topic): we don't know how their relationship is with emma nor evan. in the past, evan and sarah talked a lot about each other but we haven't seen that. also, we know what THEY want us to know, maybe they weren't even really that close. we don't know what happens backstage. i do feel weird about jeff being friends with both because he looks very close to evan but im trying to keep in mind that i know nothing about his relationship with any of these people.

there's even the hypothesis that evan and emma are in good terms (which o highly doubt). what i'm trying to say is that we have no idea what happens in their lives

well..

that's not the reason why evan didn't press charges, this man who has never given a rat's ass about celebrity was not infatuated with being mr. emma roberts - let's make that clear. he didn't press charges because he loved emma and ultimately wanted to marry her, but he was a victim of abuse. also, evan wasn't a nobody when he was dating emma.. i'm not sure how old you are, but if you were of age to be aware in 2012 when they started dating, you'd be well aware that this was peak AHS fame and when fans stopped them on the street together, 9/10 times they did not care about emma; all the girlies wanted evan and he was a heartthrob by all standards. and let's just be real: what image would emma roberts be keeping intact? there is no one, and i mean no one, who is a fan of hers who is ACTUALLY oblivious to her nature. she is not a big, successful actress whose name conjures up images of a respected professional who has lead major productions. she is a nepo baby meme who stars in romcoms no one watches.. even her stans.

"we don't know how their relationship is with emma nor evan." do you mean sarah and jeff? because if so, just last year sarah was going to be doing one of those netflix career retrospect things with evan, interviewing him. and jeff was just seen with evan a few months back. i know at least for a time, jeff was an actual friend evan hung out with pretty regularly.. sarah not so much. i think she is more ''respected colleague'' than personal friend. for me personally, the bottomline is that my feelings and opinions are not based on whether or not i think deep inside evan is hurt his friends are also still friends with emma.. because i don't believe he is bothered. i don't think he ever was. nothing about his personality nor the way he talks about himself is indicative of someone who would force his friends to side with him, even when he should NEVER have to be in the situation to do so.. this wasn't a regular situation where exes were left bitter. evan was abused, emma is a domestic abuser. i don't need to know how anyone in this situation feels about each other to know that there is no scenario in which i think it's acceptable to try and sit on the fence and be friends with both a domestic abuser AND their victim. what kind of friend are you if you see no major problem with someone assaulting them?

[traumxrei-archive]

so i: WOKE UP. NORMAL DAY. STUDYING. BREAK. CHECK ALL MY FAVORITE TUMBLRS. SEE THAT HALF OF THEM IS TALKING ABOUT TWST. CHECKED IT OUT.... LEAPED AND SCREAMED WITH JOY

stan twst for giving me and the malleus lovers what we needed in this cruel cruel world. aka my gem amount is going to crash so hard even fixitfelix became nvmfelix because of malleus's ssr i am soooooo dead. THE DIASOMNIA PV WAS SO COOL??? i have a feeling that diasomnias arc is going to be hell to play through

ANYWAYS *LOOKS AT AZUL* *LOOKS ST JAMIL* THEIR DUO VOICELINE??? ITS MAKING ME WANT TO DRAW THEM DANCING TOGETHER NGL? they're so.. augh

oh and the npc with the long hair for bell noble is SO SO SOOO PRETTY. i claim my spot being longhairedbellnoblenpcs top fan

this is bad romance anon signing off with lady gaga lyrics, diasomnia, rants, and bell noble npc praising and i thank you very much ‼️

(referring to the pandemonium that twst tumblr descended into after the announcement of glorious masquerade + book 7 announcements)

I'M VEERY LATE TO THIS BUT HELLO AGAIN !!

god if this wasn't me....i came to tumblr for vibes and got slapped in the face by the glorious masquerade ssrs and then kicked in the chest by the diasomnia pv hhhahhahaha—

honestly diasomnia pv. it was both expected and unexpected... i've brainstormed extensively about book 7 with my friend (without knowledge abt book 6 bc slay) and we did go the route of "malleus doesn't want yuu to go home so he captures them" but also, i feel like that isn't actually the whole story ? i think book 7 will deal with that, sure, but also something else that we're not aware about (or something that we'll become aware about in book 6)

oh please don't get me started on the azujami duo line....going to kick them fr bc they need to K WORD (the one that ends with s, not l) also...i have two hands :'))) let me dance with you baby girls :'))) jskfdjskf

!! lowkey interested in this long haired npc,,,,i'm a sucker for long hair on people, so i wonder what they look like (i haven't gone snooping for spoilers yet,,,,)

[not-quite-a-ghost]

Those were the good times.

Soooo...let’s pretend it’s still June 15th, yeah? 

I imagine that these two rascals took their birthday cake outside as soon as their mother had her back turned, as they wanted to spend the rest of their birthday on the coolest ship ever (and they of course don’t think ahead about sand or their lack of forks or literally anything else...such as a rogue Shanklin figuring out that cake is probably delicious.)

Now, Stanley is maybe three seconds away from falling off as he tries to shoo his stab opossum away. Meanwhile, Stanford can’t decide if he wants to try to help his goofball brother with his futile plan to stop Shanklin, or if he should protect his own sliding slice so that they can share it when aforementioned plan falls apart. (Instead, he ends up with his hand awkwardly hanging in the air while his cake slides off anyway.)

I’m guessing this still counts for the Stan Twins Event put on by @thestanbros, maybe?

[shookspearewrites]

Shookspeare Fatherhood: Leonardo

Good evening my ducklings~ Would you believe that it's taken me this long to get to Leonardo in #shookspearefatherhood? Honestly, I thought I'd finish this one early on but here we are! There's only a few more installments of this mini series left after today; I hope you've all been enjoying it!

Am tagging @alby-rei because she is just an angel who helped me out when I lost my OG draft of this piece + she's a massive Leonardo stan~!

- JJ x

~~~~~~~~~~

Bambina's Birthday Wish, Leonardo Da Vinci

"When Papa be home, Mama?" Antonietta asked as she bounced around the kitchen impatiently and tugged at MC's skirt. The birthday girl giggled sweetly as her mother placed down her rolling pin and knelt beside her, "I wanna see Papa!"

MC smiled brightly at her four year old daughter, petting her rich brown hair lovingly, "Papa will be home soon enough, Antonietta. You've got to be patient, okay?"

The little girl pouted and crossed her arms though, she wasn't really cross at all - Antonietta just wanted to see her father who'd been busy at work all day on her special birthday. Leonardo's daughter certainly took after him: She was clever and curious beyond belief, with his chocolatey brown hair and brilliant saffron eyes. Antonietta toddled across the kitchen to sit at the table and gaze at her birthday cake lovingly made by her mother, her little chin resting in her hands as she stared at the dessert.

Just as the youngest member of the Da Vinci family was beginning to get a little antsy, the kitchen door opened with a little creak and in wandered Leonardo. The pureblood vampire looked rather tired from his long day but, the exhaustion on his face washed away in favour of pure, unabashed joy upon the moment that he saw his family. He strode over to MC, his darling wife and wrapped his strong arms around her waist, kissing her cheek from where he stood behind her, "Buonasera cara."

MC blushed softly and let herself relax in her husband's comforting embrace, "Welcome home, Leonardo."

"Me too, Papa. Hug me, too!" Antonietta ran across the kitchen as fast as her short legs could carry her and hugged the side of her father's leg, nuzzling her head against it.

Leonardo chuckled warmly and swiftly picked his daughter up, cradling her against his warm chest, "Ciao, bambina." His heart surely swelled to twice it's regular size from sheer amount of love he felt in that moment as he basked in pure peace with his family. Leonardo bowed his head down to softly kiss Antonietta's cheek, making the birthday girl giggle brightly. "Happy birthday, principessa."

"She's been so excited for you to come home all day, Leonardo," MC mused sweetly, running her hands caringly across her husband's broad, tired shoulders before addressing her daughter, "You've been bouncing around the kitchen like a little bunny, haven't you, baby?"

"Si, si!" Antonietta nodded, giving an adorably toothy grin with her little fangs protruding as she nuzzled against her father's warm chest, "Can't have cake without Papa."

The pureblood smiled affectionately as he plopped his daughter down in her chair at the table, "Well, Papa is home now so, it must be time for cake." Leonardo wandered towards the kitchen draw and produced some birthday candles and a box of matches before making his way back across the kitchen. He stuck four candles into the top of the cake and lit them, making his daughter's bright eyes sparkle with delight as she giggled sweetly.

"Happy birthday, Antonietta," both MC and Leonardo said sweetly as their daughter stared wide-eyed and completely joyful. The child almost gurgled as she watched her cake glowing gently in front of her with MC's gentle hand caressing her chocolate brown hair.

"Are you going to blow out your candles and make a wish, mia tesoro?" Leonardo asked Antonietta as he smiled warmly at her, crouching by her side as her feet dangled above the floor.

"Uh-huh!" The child happily nodded before squeezing her wide eyes shut and mumbling something incoherent under her breath. Antonietta slowly blinked her bright honey gold eyes open with a smile and leaned forward towards her cake. Filling her chubby cheeks with air, the four year old tried her very hardest to blow out the candles but, her little fangs got in the way so she couldn't manage it. "Papa help?" Antonietta pleaded as she turned to face her father, her eyes brimming with hope.

"Sure thing, bambina," he chuckled warmly before swiftly blowing out the candles, "What did you wish for?"

The birthday girl blinked at Leonardo nodding at him, "Papa keep it secret?"

"I promise I'll keep it a secret."

Antonietta leaned towards her father, cupping her tiny hands around her mouth to whisper in his ear as discreetly as she could, which was not discreet at all, "Want a little brother."

Leonardo smirked as he looked over his shoulder to MC, winking at her before he turned back to his daughter, ruffling her soft hair, "I'm sure that could be arranged, principessa."

[yurtletheturtlehenderson]

Scars That Heal || Eddie Kaspbrak x Reader Series

• Ch. 11: Under Pressure •

TRIGGER WARNINGS: blatant homophobia from Nicklesmart The Beatboxing Jester™️ in disguise as someone you know, internalized homophobia throughout the whole chapter. As usual, will put a skip marker for the heavier scene before and after if you need/want to skip. It is not light, ngl 😔 [trigger words: f*iry + the f slur, each used on exactly one occasion, and (as an insult) queer. I'm so sorry, this was not easy for me either and please do not read this if any of this in any way bothers you, i won't be mad if you skip the chapter 💕]

A/N: Next chapter will be all fluff I promise 🥲, I'm so sorry, but I needed something that could solidify Richie and Y/n's friendship for good, and her helping him through his worst fear is the best way to do that and will be explored in other ways throughout the rest of the series, specifically in the sequel. all that aside, I missed you guys and this series so much!!

LGBTQ+ RESOURCES AND SELF HELP LINKS AT THE BOTTOM OF THE CHAPTER

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

- 𝗔𝗨𝗚𝗨𝗦𝗧 -

    Richie keeps his eyes trained on the dried mud on his navy blue slip-ons as he makes his way across town, his mind buzzing twice as fast as it normally did. He felt as if his entire body had been put through a blender; his skull still vibrating in his head turning his brain into jelly. His stomach empty and lurching as it twisted into knots far more impossible than what you'd see from a circus performer and his heartbeat could rival a hummingbird's. Not to mention he was walking with two extra legs he'd grow from time to time, another freaky affect the physical and mental toll these past few weeks had put on him and his eyesight. The caffeine he had been living on hadn't helped him one bit either he reckoned.

    Insomnia had become his best friend in the past few weeks, hence this last-minute trip to the old gravel pit just behind Derry Town dump. At least, this was the lie he told himself to pluck up enough courage to call Y/n up. Richie hoped she could talk him through it, give him some advice. He was never this nervous to talk to her and deep down in a corner he wished to bury forever - that small part of himself that begged to be free - knew exactly why. This small, repressed Richie Tozier that lived locked away in the center of his heart was calling the shots that day. Hell, he probably had been his whole life but he wasn't ready to admit that to himself yet, let alone his true attentions of seeking her help.

    All he knew is he was nervous as all hell, his palms were sweating, he couldn't stop fiddling with his glasses and he was sure one wrong move and he'd shit his pants. For fucks sake, he needed to shake this! He had already freaked Y/n out, that he knew. He could still hear her voice over the receiver. It was soaked in static and every 's', or 'c' sound she made felt like a pencil was being shoved into his eardrums cause of her shitty outdated telephone.

    "You," she had asked with a pause. "want to meet at... the dump?"

    "Yeah," he scoffed, scratching the same spot behind his ear for what had to be the billionth time out of nervous habit. "you got wax in your ears, L/n?"

    "Nope. Just, a little confused is all. You seem kinda... I don't know, squirrely," she said wearily, and through a sharp crackling hiss from the receiver he can make out a nervous chuckle on her end. "You sure nothin' jumped up your ass or anything?"

    He bit his lip. Hard. As if punishing himself for drawing her suspicions this early. What if she somehow caught on to what he was gonna talk to her about? Her walk to the gravel pit would surely give her enough time to get to that conclusion, and Richie wasn't daft. He knew he wasn't exactly subtle about... "insomnia". What with how many times he teased insomnia, called it that special nickname he knew it hated but secretly loved. That forbidden flutter in his chest when insomnia would laugh at his jokes, and the small but precious moments they shared from time to time when the others were late that would stay in his heart and mind for weeks to come. But it didn't matter now, as everyone knew; insomnia kept Y/n's company now.

    Thankfully his mouth was faster than his brain, and it fired a rapid response before a lull could form.

    "You bet your fur," he fires, his lanky arm had rested awkwardly against the wall beside the wall mount. "I am right as rain, toots."

    He of course hadn't seen it, but she had frowned at her phone. Her concern was growing with every word spoken from him.

    "Yeah," she snorts, throwing back a sarcastic remark. "Cause you sound it."

    She had eased a bit, growing soft and falling back into their usual banter. Their special dynamic always seemed to coax down his guard a bit.

    "You're talking like a 1950's gangster in a speakeasy," She straightened a little and had begun pacing as much as the phone cord would allow her. "Ya know... More than usual."

    Y/n smiled when she could practically hear the smirk taking over his face, and she certainly had no trouble picturing his hunched shoulders and intimidating snarl he was most likely dawning.

    "It's a little somethin' called moxie, kid," he spoke with curled his words, imitating all the gangsters he had seen in those cheesy old films. "somethin' you just don't have,"

    Y/n had rolled her eyes again, at least Richie could see her doing so when he heard her respond. "Right, right. My bad Baby Face."

    "Hey!" He barked, snapping his fingers and pointing at the floor as if she could see him. His voice lowered in a thick Chicago accent. "That's mista Baby Face to ya."

    "Mista Baby Face Nelson!" She strained, her annoyed shout tainted with a laugh. "Are we meeting at five or not?"

    Richie released a quick and silent breath, expelling as many nerves as possible.

    "You bet your fur."

    The exchange kept playing over and over in his mind and Richie wondered if the same rang true for Y/n. He hoped not, cause that would mean she was thinking about it too much. Hell, he was thinking about it too much now. A heavy sigh rolls off of his chest as every anxiety collectively manifests into its own dark thought.

    Fuck, he really had it bad.

    How pathetic he was.

    Eddie would surely be horrified to know what Richie really thought of him, that was for sure.

    And as if he hadn't felt crazy enough, the thoughts actually began to feel like voices calling him from the darkest shadows of his mind.

    'And the other Losers? You'll be lucky if they even look at you again.'

    Richie was surprised to find himself fighting back, pushing back as much as he could. Despite all the jokes and jabs, he couldn't be completely alone. A small part whispered in his heart that he wasn't, and he thought briefly of the turtle strangely enough but it was gone just as soon as it had come. All he knew was that whatever was telling him this thing was stubborn. But so was Richie Tozier.

    He treated it as an intrusive thought. Made a decision then and there that it was, never occurring to him what it could be if wasn't.

    No way. Not those assholes, he tells the voice. These are the Losers for fucks sake!

    The more he thought about it the more he was sure of it. God forbid Eddie did find out, which Richie had no intention of, and what would happen was in fact unclear. But no matter how he looked at it, he just couldn't picture the little spaghetti man ever cutting him out of his life completely. Not by choice at least.

    Now Ben, that lovable sappy haystack of his that was too passionate for his own good. Richie may not be the silent type but he does pick up on things, and Hanscom's affections for Beverly Marsh were far from subtle. Always opening doors for her and turning redder than a tomato when she smiled at him. Not to mention Richie was about ninety percent sure there was a poem of some sort involved. And that was just Beverly, Ben was always thinking of the Losers. Now Richie knew for sure that boy had no hateful bone in his body to the point it was fucking annoying.

    Mike, Richie felt, might be a little similar. The kid had a lot of heart, always going on about the animals on his farm. Would even go as far to say he considered them his friends, what with how much Richie knew about Mooriuel the calf and he hadn't even met her for cripes sake! Richie imagined he'd be a bit more shocked but would try some sappy speech when he came around. Would make a whole big thing of it, pat him on the back, and even invite a conversation. He scoffed at the thought, the image of Mike slapping him on the back and his signature grin... Yeah, he appreciated the hypothetical gesture but it wasn't Richie's style.

    He could easily see Big Bill sputtering up a storm, but managing a smile. He'd probably even manage to forget their differences long enough to say something stupid but supportive. And Beverly and Stan were the ones he worried about the least. Stan would probably be too indifferent to care, throw him some snarky ass comment like, "took ya long enough, dipshit," and Beverly? Well, Beverly had always been cool, very laid back. She never took shit, and she never dished it out if she didn't think it was deserved which Richie admired greatly. This was one of many reasons he was so shocked she had taken Bill's side in the fight.

    The thought brings him back down again, and as soon as the memory touches him so do the nerves in his jaw tensing up again where he had been hit. He could feel the punch all over again. And he suddenly remembers why he is here.

    He is here, he realized.

    Just around the bend, coming into view was the gravel pit. Old and crumbling it was, and overrun with weeds and bushes. One could easily scale in and out of it, and at the very bottom Rich had discovered one day was a beaten and tattered leather seat from a car that found its way from the junkyard just a ways over. This was where he told Y/n to meet him.

    Y/n...

    Jesus fuck, what would Y/n say? How would he tell her? Would she still wanna be friends with him? Would she laugh and crack a joke, not taking it seriously? Would she hate him for it? More importantly, why in the ever-loving fuck was he here and willing to tell her?

    His gangly legs tumble into a sprint as he picks up momentum descending the uneven terrain. The rubber soles of his shoes kicking up the layers of dirt and shaved gravel that lay beneath the rocks and he had to put effort into not crashing as he comes to a stop. He manages to avoid a nasty fall, completely ignorant to the fact that his right foot had been only inches away from a root peeking out from the rocks surely would have broken his neck had he made even one wrong move. He puffs out his chest, dusting himself off, and once again tries to dispel the nausea broiling in his stomach like hot tar.

    He closes his eyes tiredly as he drags his feet to the leather bench, letting his backside fall through the air and into the somewhat plush cushion with a deep groan. "Fuck."

    His fingers rub his tired eyes, his fingertips finding bits of crust he hadn't gotten earlier and his knuckles brush his glasses further up onto his forehead. Not quite knowing what to do with the overwhelming thoughts and emotions clouding him, his fingers dig further into his eye sockets until all he can see are inky splotches behind his eyes.

    Richie doesn't know why he would ever think those things of Y/n. He hadn't ever told her this, not directly at least, but she was just about the only person in the world he trusted most. He knew in his heart of hearts this was why he found himself dialing her number before he could even register what he was doing. Even after their separation and the bitter feelings they took with it, the Losers were and always would be his best friends in the world.

    So why did everything about this feel so wrong?

    From the moment the phone call ended, he felt like he was waltzing into a trap like some putz...

    "Well, look who it is..." snarled a voice from up above the surface.

    Richie's blood ran cold and it felt as if the remainder of the air in his lungs had been squeezed out like air in a deflating balloon. He whipped around at the voice, his head twisting up at the silhouetted figure so fast he was shocked he hadn't broken his own neck. The figure held their hands on their hips, thousands of the sun's rays spilling around them as they blocked out a part of the sun, an advantage they reaped from where they stood before Richie at just the right angle. His breath caught in his throat as he had recognized the voice immediately, but the figure didn't quite match the voice.

    The last thing person he needed to see right now was Henry fucking Bowers, that was for sure.

    The universe agreed so it would seem. The figure shifted, just out of the light revealing the teasing smirk of his best friend Y/n. Her hands snapped together, her palms forming a handgun, the barrel aiming right at Richie's forehead.

    "The jig is up," she snarled. "We knows it was you. You was the ones to steal from Big Bill's dame, and I wouldn't be surprised if yous was in cahoots, neithers."

    Despite the fear that had clutched his heart only seconds ago, a small chortle left Richie at how awful her accent was. Hadn't she learned anything from him? A smug smile overtook Y/n's face as he broke. She holstered her handguns and gracefully descended the pile of gravel. His smile expired not long after, and despite the thin veil of clouds creeping over the sun the light in the sky was much too hard to even glance at his friend without blinking back several painful searing tears from the harsh light. But he could still make her out.

    She was dressed in her usual ratty and eclectic garb; a mix of something far too big for her frame and something that seemed far too tight to be comfortable. Richie was certain she had never once owned even a thread of clothing that had always been hers. Her s/c brow had its usual, light glossy sheen of grease that Richie had learned very early on to not ask about. But there was something about her now, something he couldn't quite place.

    Though one question kept popping up in his mind. One that left an itch in his brain he couldn't quite scratch in his dazed state. And that was how could he have possibly thought she sounded like Henry Bowers?

    He finds himself looking down at the gravel now, wiping away as much of the sun's damage pooling in his eyes as he can. Unbeknownst to him, she watches him studiously, the ghost of her smile still on her lips as if she was enjoying his discomfort. His long and gangly limbs are folded awkwardly, still, onto the leather seat that sits on the ground. Finally, she takes a seat beside him with a huff as he had.

    As he rubs his tired eyes for a second time she takes a long look around, breaking the silence when her trip around the gravel pit lands on him.

    "Well, you've looked better." She quips, offering a smile.

    Richie snorts, pushing his slipping glasses up the bridge of his nose with a friendly smirk. "This comin' from Raggedy Ann?"

    They both breathe a small laugh and for a moment - just one beautiful, fleeting moment - Richie forgets he was ever scared. This is what he needed.

    "So," she says, pulling his gaze towards her, sending him a cocky smile as a knowing look sparkles behind her eyes. "I'm guessing there's a reason I'm here, and not helping you with your summer training?"

    Richie, for reasons unknown to him, feels his muscles tense up again involuntarily. Like a puppeteer suddenly yanking the strings, ripping his shoulders up to his ears and his muscles bracing. He felt rigid and he was, but he was doing all he could not to show it. All his unease came back in steady waves marching up the sand, but what could he do now? He could already feel her eyes burning holes into the side of his head as he kicked around a sizeable rock with the toe of his shoe, studying him. Waiting.

    Finally, his shoulders slumped in a shrug, lower lip in an indifferent pout as he looked around at the sky hanging above the gravel pit.

    "Just needed a change from all those ugly mugs, I guess," he manages a laugh, and he rises to his feet to lazily chase the rock that had rolled out of his reach.

    He can feel her eyes on him still, and he doesn't know what to make of it until finally she breaks her silence with a chuckle and rises to join him. She catches the rock with the heel of her dirtied sneakers. They're worn down to the very last thread and several shades off from the original color. She kicks the rock back to him, and they engage in a lazy game of rock soccer.

    "I can understand that," she says calmly, eyes trained on the rock as it tumbles across the gravel with several chunky clanks. "Reckon it'll be good for you, too,"

    He frowns confused without looking up at her, winding one lanky leg back before one big kick. "Whad'ya mean?"

    "Well, you don't wanna spend your whole summer inside of an arcade, do you?"

    Richie's face freezes in a frown, the rest of his body going rigid. His eyes cement on the rock underneath his shoe, willing away the veil of tears that threatened to fall. Had he not been so caught up on why he was here, Richie might have had a clear enough head to realize Y/n wasn't there for that conversation, nor had she heard about it from anyone there. Instead, all Rich can think about is the small hypochondriac boy that had stolen his heart.

    He can hear the conversation he had with his best friend, all those weeks ago when school let out. And if felt like a lifetime since he had seen that squishable, pouty little disgusted frown Eddie always put on that made Richie's inside melt. As if reading his mind, Y/n spoke.

    "This is about Eddie, isn't it?"

    Her tone is gentle but veiled. Something was concealed about the way she held herself, ever since she had arrived, something that Richie couldn't quite place. And there it was. He was right about her suspecting him, he must be. Richie battles the lump forming in his throat, and he can feel his ears turning pink under her unwavering and unblinking stare.

    Richie does all he can to fight a snarky response, not knowing how else to navigate and survive the intensity of his feelings. All he manages to do is nod.

[■■■■■■■■■■■■]

    "Rich, it's okay," she says, taking a step forward, his gaze is pulled to her eyes. And here it is, he thinks. The moment he had been dreading, the moment he hadn't even allowed himself to think about. "...I miss him, too."

    His face caught in another frown. That's definitely not what he expected her to say. Quickly as he could, he wiped away a spot of snot at his nose. He had managed to keep the tears at bay but now they had found another way out. He felt like a fucking fool, and he wanted nothing more than for the ground to open up and swallow him whole. Of course she didn't know what he was talking about. Why would she - how would she? His spirits were crushed, and he suddenly didn't feel like getting into it now. She seemed off today, not that Richie cared. All he wanted was for this whole day to be over with, not even knowing the worst had yet to come.

    She studies his reaction, almost as if she had been waiting for this and she blinks for what Richie is now starting to realize must be the first time since she got here. Y/n's face screws into a frown, and yet there still lingered an uneasy smile that taunted him. Her eyes squint suspiciously at Richie, her head tilting in an expression he never knew he had always feared would come.

    She laughs finally, a shrill and grating laugh he hadn't quite heard before and she nudges him playfully. "Oh, come on! It's not like you've got some faggy crush on him or something?"

    When he doesn't answer, she scoffs, turning away and shaking her head in disbelief for a moment.

    Richie felt he just might vomit. Or cry. Or both. He had never felt so distraught, so dejected. So broken.

    How could she be saying these things?

    He tries with all his might to conjure a response, any fucking thing at all so he wasn't some blubbering broken chump breaking down in front of her. But for the first time in his life, Richie "loudmouth" Tozier was speechless.

    That fuck-awful grating laugh returns, a sour look screws up her face as she looks him up and down in disgust.

    "Wait, seriously?" She gapes with a scoff, making him feel about two inches tall. "You actually think he'd want to be with some fairy freak like you?"

    "F-f-uck off," he sputters, though he does not feel better.

    The trembling in his voice, the vulnerability, hearing it in himself strips any remaining scrap of confidence he had left. He's crying now and there's no hiding it. And she heard it in his voice, he knew that now as he looks at her. Her lips curl into a malicious smile and she takes another step closer, Richie fumbles a step back.

    "He isn't some," her nose crinkles as she continues to advance on him, the fire in her eyes building as he stumbles back to escape her sudden venom. "rotten queer like you."

    Y/n spits the words out like they were poison on her tongue, and this was true in every way. Her fiery stare never left Richie, it burned holes right through him as she advanced on him like a wolf on a wounded doe. They were nearing the edge of the gravel pit, and Richie had nearly run out of room when her finger stabbed his chest like a sword's final strike to the heart, pushing him to the ground as she spoke those poisonous words.

    Richie felt his backside meet several jagged rocks that brought even more tears to his eyes, though none of them hurt as much as her words. She towered over him now, the sun beating down on her back and pouring over her shoulders, trapping Richie in her shadow. She shakes her head, and he can still make out the pathetic look on her face as she glowers at him.

    "It's girls he likes. It's me he likes." she points to herself, shaking her head. "He was mine the second he saw me, but you?"

    She scoffs again, and her shadow releases him as she kneels to balance on her feet, legs folded before him with a snide look.

    "You've always been the insufferable loudmouth he couldn't get rid of." A sharp laugh escapes her, the clutch on his heart tightening to dangerous amounts he fears it will give out. "Well, I guess he doesn't have to worry about that now, huh?"

    His heart feels as if it has been ripped to shreds, the claws of the wolf had struck and now he was drowning in his own sorrows as pain as the heartbreak filled his lungs. Richie could no longer see behind the thick wall of glassy tears that blanketed his eyes, and the sounds of his own sobs amplified his embarrassment and despair. He was hopelessly broken, and he could feel himself crumble, each piece disappearing amongst the gravel underneath him until he couldn't be found. He blinked only once, but it was enough to send every tear racing down his cheek at once.

    Another malicious smile contorts her face, her e/c eyes burning darker until they looked almost a completely different shade. Her lips seemed to stretch on and on and on in a way only one thing could. And it was then that it occurred to him.

    Not one thing she had said to him is something he could have ever prepared himself for, each word constricting his heart and lungs and swelling his throat with the ever-growing lump.

    Nor was any of it something she would ever dream of saying, he knew this now.

[■■■■■■■■■■■■]

    This wasn't Y/n, this was never Y/n. She had never showed, and if he hadn't been so wrapped up in his own fucking head he would have caught on from the second "Y/n" arrived. Especially that entrance, Y/n surely would have fallen on her ass on her way down into the gravel pit never mind the fact her accent wouldn't be nearly as shit.

    But none of this mattered now. This thing that looked like his friend had him cornered, and It knew it.

    A wicked grin overtook the mask of Y/n's face that chilled Richie to his bones, and yet it also reassured him. Y/n was tough and could be scary from time to time, but he knew she could never be capable of the pure evil that now danced in It's eyes. Richie's body was already in motion, his arms and legs scrambling for any sort of grip that could take him up the side of the pit and to safety. But the gravel beneath him was always shifting, rolling out from underneath him when it wasn't raking his palms to pieces and all he was accomplishing was a small plume of dust that clung to his backside.

    Richie didn't know where it came from, but his actions were faster than his feelings as his fist collided with It's nose. And no sooner did the heel of his shoe collide in a painful crack that sent It's head back, did his eyes widen in horrific shock. The painful crack that would surely haunt him for many nights to come, had not been from the collision of his heel on It's nose but It's head - or Y/n's as this was still It's disguise - had snapped completely back and dangled completely off It's/her shoulders.

    The only thing connecting her head to her shoulders was the suit of s/c skin. Protruding from the center of her neck just under the skin was the end of her spine where it had disconnected, giving away a disturbing lack of muscles and veins in her neck as if it had been hollowed out like a pumpkin. Her head rolled back and forth limply, and Richie could feel bile climbing up his throat, ready to burst out his digested mac and cheese.

    His mind was screaming at his legs to run while all was still but a small part of him knew this was all a gambit, that it didn't matter if she was frozen stiff or not. Richie knew as soon as he booked it, It would spring to life with something even more twisted. That now, without his friends, he was as good as dead.

    And It was more than happy to prove Richie right.

    The clone of his friend sprang to life, It's head still rolling around on It's shoulders. Connected only by the skin of It's neck, and moving around like some fucked up slinky toy. Richie was already halfway up the gravel pit, bits of rock and dirt finding their way into his shoes as he kicked up the earth though that was the farthest thing from his mind.

    By the time Richie reached the top of the pit, he could no longer hear the thunderous boom of his heart attempting to break loose from his chest, which was saying an awful lot. His screams echoed out into the air only to be swallowed by the screams of other children and Richie didn't know how he knew this but he knew those were the screams of Betty Ripsom, Ed Corcoran... Georgie Denbrough. The bloodied screams of It's victims were drowning Richie as he ran for the junkyard, and he wondered if he might live to hear them stop.

    The screams were so fucking loud in his ears he could see them. Each of them a blinding, deafening, gut-wrenching, and blood-curdling scream that danced through the air like ribbons as they begged for their lives. Richie cried out and he couldn't even hear his own voice, but he didn't let this stop his legs from pumping as hard as they possibly could. He was nearly to the junkyard, surely he could use something to fend It off but he knew he was just buying time.

    He could taste the blood on his tongue from where his teeth bit into his cheek. In all his short life, Richie Tozier would not have guessed child-eating clown to be the way he'd kick the can. When ever the thought of death began troubling him, he always liked to picture something like a western. Him and his rightful enemy squaring off against good and evil, he'd shoot first and save the day but still sustain an injury and bleed out. But it'd be a hero's death. And that was something.

   But this... this was something born out of darker than evil and Richie was about to be pulled into the gravity well of this black hole and swallowed up. And he knew in his soul, the very pits of his stomach it would reach out with its shadowy arms and pull him into darkness.

    And it did.

    Richie had been rapidly approaching the edge of the junkyard without realizing and within an instant found himself on the ground, caved in on himself as he tumbled in the dirt and rocks accepting he was to join them soon enough. He closed his eyes and waited for death as a hand curled around his shoulder and pulled him around. Another jolt of shock shot through his entire body at the sudden contact, locking his jaw and paralyzing his entire body in fear as he was met with the new threat. He didn't dare open his eyes, and certainly not when he heard his best friend's voice again.

    "Richie! Richie?"

    It was her again, he realized. Y/n's real voice, the one that he heard on the telephone that was dripped in static. The one now dripped in fear.

   "Richie?!"

    When the boy opened his eyes, they were filled with terror and his sobs continued. A lense Y/n never thought she'd see Richie look at her through. Her heart broke in an instant when she realized he was afraid... of her. Instantly, she released him and let her backside fall back into the gravel. She watched through a thick wall of tears as he trembled, crying to himself, and never in all her life had she seen Richie Tozier so broken.

    It tore her apart.

    She didn't have to be a genius to realize what had happened here. Before she had even reached the junkyard on her bike she had heard his screams strangled through the wall of trees gating the area. When she had reached the gravel yard, she was happy to see him still in one piece but he was running for his life from an invisible force. The damn coward had gotten what It wanted and scared him shitless, but why would he disappear just because she showed? She had wondered.

    Now she was beginning to understand. It didn't need to be here to scare her. Just the sight of Richie in such a state was enough to tear her down and it took just about everything in her not to scream into the sky from a mix of fury and fear.

    Besides the tears that race down her cheeks and wet her legs, all Y/n could feel was a painfully numbing fear. Fear that Richie would never be the same. Fear that Richie would never speak to her again. Fear that Richie would never trust her again. Fear for whatever the fucking hell that thing did to Richie. Fear that It would do it again.

    All she felt now was fear for Richie.

    Y/n doesn't bother to fight the sob that breaks loose, her bottom lip quivers violently and her arms fall to the gravely pavement beneath her. As if her head had filled with lead, it grew heavy enough to fall into her chest where her chin landed, shaking several more tears loose.

    "I'm s-so sorry, Richie,"

    Y/n yearns to say more, but her body is physically weak from sadness and shame. Yet still, she repeats it in her mind hoping with everything in her it slips out of her mouth, or maybe if she thought them loud enough he'd hear them in his mind.

    I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't there. I'm sorry for whatever happened. I'm so goddamn sorry...

    "I'm sorry," she whimpers. "I promise..."

    I promise I'm not gonna hurt you. I promise I'm not gonna hate you. I promise I'm gonna be there for you, from now on. I promise.

    Her sniffles blend with his own, and Richie is unsure why this is the moment he knows for sure this is the real Y/n before him; maybe he was just too exhausted to think it through, perhaps it was the godawful sound she was making trying to keep herself from snotting as bad as he was but he knew It had gone. And the Y/n sitting beside him — crying with him, was the one he dialed up today. This was the Y/n he had been prepared to bare his soul to. His true self.

    So with one shaky hand — the other still tucked in close to his chest — Richie's left hand slid out from under him and across the gravel to Y/n's open palm. Her fingers were digging into the gravel, sharp edges of the rock digging into her skin as if to assure herself she was really real. Suddenly, she felt Richie's shaky palm slide underneath hers, carefully taking it.

    Y/n picked her glassy stare up from the ground to look at their intertwined hands, and she melted a little. Several of those fears — not all of them, but some — were ebbed away and she looked to Richie. He was still curled up in the dirt, his eyes closed and silent tears streaking his dirt-covered face. Each tear paved a path of clean skin, washing the dirt away in wild streaks where ever each tear had fallen. Several large and swollen beads of tears collected at his chin where they dangled, threatening to fall.

    She gave his hand a squeeze, letting him know she was there for him as she had promised him. And she was ready to sit with him for as long as he needed.

    For hours that feel only like minutes, they sit together in tear-filled silence, clinging to one another's presence and the knowledge that they are now all they have left.

    And there was no way they were letting go.

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Here are some LGBTQ+ resources for mental health and self help if you feel you need them:

How do I find LGBTQ friendly therapy?

An article on safe ways to find the best sources of help that are right for you

The Trevor Project

Self Care Tips for Trans and Non Binary Folks

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[klm-zoflorr]

ATLA MixedUp! AU part II: The person who discovers the Avatar

Masterpost

So, Avatar Katara got lost somewhere and is in dire need of help. Who's gonna rescue the baby avatar?

Oh God. It's Azula

... What element does Azula control, then?

Earth! And what sub-element (if any?)

She's a metal bender !

Here's how it goes (with the limited info I have for now, especially on their families. Because they both have relatives that are still undetermined :/): Azula, earthbending prodigy, didn't feel like her life at home allowed her to reach her full potential. So one night she takes off to travel across the Earth Kingdom. She fights, she hardens, and one day she discovers metal bending. Amazed by her newfound power, she practices non-stop, of course.

One day, as she's setting camp, she hears scream. She goes to see what's making all that noise, and discovers Katara surrounded by a group of Earth Kingdom soldiers. Knowing that the girl with golden eyes doesn't pose a national threat, Azula takes off to help her. But, althought the two girls' motivation is great, they do not manage to fight off all the soldiers. That's when Katara's Avatar State unlocks, and also when Azula discovers who exactly the girl is. She will then join her on her travels, out of a want to teach her one of the elements she's missing, but also to protect her. They're going to try to find an airbending teacher, which... Is easier said than done!

This Azula is... Nicer, in some way? Yeah. She wasn't raised with the belief everyone else is inferior, so that helps. She does have a pretty nice sense of humor. I'm not too sure on her personality yet, because we'll see about that when I know where she was raised ah ah.

Azula wears comfy fighting clothes, and her hairstyle is practically identical to her fire nation counterpart. I gave her green eyes for now, might change them later on when I know who Zuko (who is still her brother) is. She's a lil rough, a lil bloody, with wraps around her arms and a little scar over her eyebrow. I like to imagine living in nature and fighting for her life wasn't a very relaxing job lol. Yes, I clearly stole the same rock background effect from Katara's drawing. Are they both pieces of metal? Can Katara metalbend? Mmmm.... I don't know xD

P.S (for Azutara stans): Don't get your hopes too up, because I'm still not 100% certain I'm gonna make that happen, but it's clearly a possibility in my mind (if I do happen to write it xD ). After all, who wouldn't have a crush on the hot, badass, independant earthbender??

[normal-thoughts-official]

Ppl be like "Magnus can't have flaws??! How dare you say nice things about him?!??" sometimes. All of Magnus' characteristics that we use to describe him are Canon but ppl act like we're making his personality up??? Saw someone tag a post abt ppl only making up personalities for guys nd not girls with his name as if he wasn't a main and didn't have his own story+background. It was made worse as they tagged the same post with damon Salvatore nd now I feel sick.

Book!magnus isn't flawed he's a straight up asshole. Ppl like to say he's better than show!magnus because of his dick ways and I'm just like: ????. Show!Magnus does have flaws idiots just lack the critical thinking to find them!

idk who damon salvatore is (i mean im vaguely aware hes from that vampire diaries thing but i know nothing beyond that) but otherwise i agree with u (also, ppl got a lot of nerve putting a coc in a list like that like being a moc means being treated even slightly the same way as a white man lmao. i mean yeah sure hes still got male privilege but are you serious? fandom treating a coc like he deserves nuance and well thought out headcanons and love and attention? wish i lived in that world)

what rlly drives me crazy about this whole "magnus is allowed to have flaws" thing is that like, yeah, he sure is! especially because poc are never allowed to be even the slightest bit human, much less flawed, without people getting up in arms about it. magnus' got plenty of flaws! he's stubborn, he's self sacrificial, he hides his feelings from others, he pushes ppl away when they get too close to his vulnerabilities, he has a tendency to simply Decide what other ppl want or need (like with alec and that whole moving to idris thing), he is impulsive, and a lot of other shit

and it's exactly those flaws that draw me to him, honestly! like i talk about how kind and caring he is all the time, and that is true, but i know that this is, at least partially, him feeling like he needs to be useful to be loved, and erasing himself/defining himself by what he can do for others, which is the same trait that leads him to act in all these ways i mentioned above. it's why i relate to him! it's why i love him! magnus isn't perfect, he is good, a good person, and there's a difference

which is the point i have been wanting to make when i started writing this answer because like. what drives me crazy the most is how those dark magnus stans or whatever love to say that they write him as an evil person who literally enjoys hurting others (like im sorry but have you watched the show?) because he's "allowed to have flaws". usually the same ppl who keep being like "i write my relationships realistically!" and when u check out their fics, it's like, literally abuse. like straight up physical violence and manipulation and gaslighting. and. that's not being realistic, girl! that's normalizing abuse

and it's one thing if this is a dark fic and its supposed to be bad or whatever and u just want to explore that, god knows i write about abuse all the damn time. its another to be like "actually if ppl arent like that its not realistic and ur writing them as perfect uwu beans and u have no nuance and are a bad writer". cuz honestly, if u think "having flaws" is being straight up abusive, and that it's "unrealistic" otherwise, then that tells me all i need to know about how u live ur relationships. if u think its literally impossible to exist in the real world without abusing others then i dont want to have shit to do with u, buddy

(and im not even saying that from just a logical standpoint but also from experience because ive had exes and ex friends who used this whole "actually humans are naturally selfish and dont care about others and enjoy hurting others it's human nature" rethoric [and the whole "realistic" thing is really just that except applied to fiction] and surprise! they were all abusive! either to me or other ppl i knew, usually both)

and it's not unrealistic to be kind and care about others! on the contrary, it's a very normal and natural human trait. so miss me with that "either ur character literally enjoys torturing other ppl or he's being written as perfect" shit. which of course gains particularly strong tones when ppl r writing coc, esp moc. like no one insists that if alec doesn't feel literal pleasure hurting others then that's unrealistic and ppl r making his personality up and treating him like he's perfect. i wonder why 🙄

like the bar for "being written realistically" for white ppl is having flaws, for poc it's being straight up cruel

miss me with that shit! magnus is kind, he is selfless, he is caring, he is willing to do anything to help others, he is loving beyond anything else even after all his trauma! and yes, he is still flawed and realistic, and no, he is not an innocent baby. if he were i wouldn't be into it because i don't want a character who's kind because he doesn't know better, i want a character who's kind because they choose to. nothing could possibly be more boring to me than a character who's nice and unaware that other ppl might be assholes, i want characters who know exactly how terrible other people can be, who have experienced it firsthand, but who are still kind because that's who they are and what they believe in. and that's magnus! he knows perfectly well how full of horrors the world is, how sometimes there is no right choice, how sometimes u need to make sacrifices, how some people are really selfish and cruel and he's even been used by those specifically because he's too kind of selfless. he just chooses to still be kind and selfless anyway

if you could never, that's not my problem, or his writing's lol

[thousandeyesand-one]

S08E01

Ok so here's where D&D suck. They try to create an "open to interpretation" kind of scenario with most female characters, arya is definitely there but nobody is given a hard time over it more than Daenerys. They never explain or make her explain the why's & how's, because they want daenerys to be the "bad ass dragon queen whose impulse has given the show it's many epic cinematic moments"

GRRM does something quite similar too. He writes characters as faulted as human beings are supposed to be, he likes to conflict a reader's mind in the most tiring way possible. He said afterall he believes Faulkner's words "The only thing worth writing about is the human heart in conflict with itself".

He makes his character do an action/say some words that more or likely they HAD to. But then he introduces the consequences of the said action/words while at the same time he gives a reason & understanding of why such a hard decision was made/tough words were used. GRRM creates conflict in such a way that it is upto YOU. The Reader, to decide for themselves what they make of the situation. Which ultimately means it's only one's assumption to choose to believe the character was wrong because you choose to ignore the reason behind their action/words. While the one's who support the character chooses to accept the character not only with the reason behind the action/words but also with the consequences of it.

Your "hate" towards daenerys is just YOUR assumption, your villainization of daenerys is just YOUR assumption, your degradation of daenerys's efforts & experiences is just YOUR assumption. Not the actual story definitely not the author's intent.

The scene where daenerys takes the unsullied is the most bad-ass, jaw dropping & inspiring scene centered on a female character ever. When it dropped I remember GA being taken by how "bad-ass" she is. But now I see haters using Astaphor as a "brutality" condoned by daenerys. All because the show never cared to reflect upon a deeper more sympathetic thought process behind doing what she did. While tge book reading haters like I said above choose to ignore her reason & only care about the consequences.

Tv Show: "we never really get this sense .. of her capacity for cruelty. They are surrounded by people who are terrible people but haven't done anything to her personally. It's interesting to me how the sphere of her empathy widens the sphere of her cruelty widens as well."

-Dan Weiss ( X )

Books:

"I was alone for a long time, Jorah. All alone but for my brother. I was such a small scared thing. Viserys should have protected me, but instead he hurt me and scared me worse. He shouldn't have done that. He wasn't just my brother, he was my king. Why do the gods make kings and queens, if not to protect the ones who can't protect themselves?"

"Some kings make themselves. Robert did."

"He was no true king," Dany said scornfully. "He did no justice. Justice . . . that's what kings are for."

– Daenerys III ASOS

The show never showed this side of daenerys's story GRRM is literally giving a reason behind what she is doing at Astaphor while in the future books you get the consequences of those actions, THAT'S HOW YOU CREATE AN INTERNAL CONFLICT IN A READER (&/or) VIEWER.

What D&D do with dany all the time is leave her reasons behind & only show her actions & the consequences. Which over time lead everyone to believe she is descending into some form of madness, that she is an entitled power hungry monarch & that she is actually being a villain! Ignoring the fact that D&D draw inspiration for the show from a book series whose author treats all of his characters in a conflicting manner. 

Something like that happened in s08e01. Am not talking about the s@nsa vs daenerys situation. I think it's a call back to Alaric Stark & Queen Alysanne Targaryen's relations. Alaric Stark was known to be cold & hard towards Queen Alysanne at first but eventually softened towards her in time being as he got to know her more. S@nsa stans don't need a reason to hate on daenerys so this storyline was like a gift to them to continue that petty hate.

No matter what their relationship prospers into I have to say s@nsa was being unnecessarily rude towards daenerys. Alaric Stark actually had a reason to be cold towards the Targaryens, his brother died defending the wall against a mutiny caused by some prisoners King Jaehaerys had sent to the wall. But there is nothing that daenerys did to harm the Starks?! S@nsa herself has no reason to hold a grudge towards daenerys or the Targaryens. The northern lords are being a bunch of ignorant fucks still dwelling on the politics of the past that which a "smart" person would overlook given the state of emergency they are in. Instead s@nsa is using that ignorance to incite more segregation in Winterfell. Knowing well that the wall was breached she is treating the dragons as a burden when girl! they are your best defence against the undead one that Night King controls. S@nsa might be smart but right now she is not acting smart!

Regarding the matter of food, I don't think s@nsa understands the level of danger that the oncoming army of the dead possesses against the living. Alaric Stark was judgemental of Queen Alysanne & the party that travelled with her because she wasn't necessarily there to defend Winterfell against anything, she was there on one of the many royal progression's that the king & queen did all over the kingdoms. But daenerys isn't here on some progress she is here to stand her armies beside the North men & Knights of the Vale in the fight. It is S@nsa's duty as the Lady of Winterfell to arrange for the food & other commodities for perhaps the greatest alliance northerners have.

I don't much tread into the doylism aspect of things but the way s@nsa said that she didn't account for the dothraki & the unsullied did she mean she was expecting Jon to die in the south? Because there was only two ways Jon's southern trip would go he might return with allies hence more mouths to feed or he might die. That sure don't sound all that smart of a deduction though!

When daenerys said "whatever they want" she defended her children reminds me of how everyone used to tell the direwolves don't belong inside the castle walls but out in the wild but the stark kids defended them anyways. Daenerys did the same thing too she defended her magical wild beasts who, just like the direwolves are dangerous & different.

Daenerys expecting respect from sansa isn't entitlement, Jon is S@nsa's king & daenerys is Jon's Queen. By that it is a certain decency to give daenerys that respect. In inside the episode video David nutter & Sophie say that s@nsa wants daenerys to know that this is HER home??! I mean daenerys doesn't want her home she wants your respect, she has a home it's called Dragonstone!

“No man has ever died from bending his knee,” her father had once told her.

“He who kneels may rise again, blade in hand. He who will not kneel stays dead, stiff legs and all.”

-the Kings Prize ADWD

I just can't wait until s@nsa softens upto daenerys like Alaric did towards Alysanne. So people can actually focus on other more important things in the storyline.

Then about the reaction Sam had when he learnt about his father & brother's death.. THAT WAS ABSURD. He clearly wasn't that sad when he learned of randyll's death but his brother's death affected him most. Which reminds me of a quote..

He wondered whether Dickon would shed a tear for his brother who died in the snow, somewhere off beyond the edge of the world. Why should he? A coward’s not worth weeping over.

-Samwell I, ASOS.

Do it now. Stop crying and fight, you baby. Fight, craven. It was his father he heard, it was Alliser Thorne, it was his brother Dickon and the boy Rast.

Craven, craven, craven. He giggled hysterically, wondering if they would make a wight of him, a huge fat white wight always tripping over its own dead feet.

Do it, Sam. Was that Jon, now? Jon was dead. You can do it, you can, just do it.

-Samwell I, ASOS.

Sam remembers his brother in the books with the likes of Ser Alliser Thorne & Rast. It is understandable that his heart might be broken to listen of his brothers death but to do what he did especially to the last remaining family of his mentor, Maester Aemon  Who treated him 1000x times better than both his father & brother.. Maester Aemon felt so passionately about Daenerys & he only trusted that information to Sam.

"No one ever looked for a girl," he said. "It was a prince that was promised, not a princess. Rhaegar, I thought... What fools we were, who thought ourselves so wise! The error crept in from the translation. Dragons are neither male nor female, Barth saw the truth of that, but now one and now the other, as changeable as flame. The language misled us all for a thousand years. Daenerys is the one, born amidst salt and smoke. The dragons prove it." Just talking of her seemed to make him stronger. "I must go to her. I must."

-Maester Aemon, Samwell IV, AFFC.

Daenerys is our hope. Tell them that, at the citadel. Make them listen. They must send her a Maester. Daenerys must be counseled, taught, protected."

-Maester Aemon, Samwell IV, AFFC.

Alleras stepped up next to sam. "Aemon would've gone to her if he had the strength. He wanted us to send a Maester to her, to counsel her & protect her & fetch her safely home." "Did he?" Archmaester marwyn shrugged. "Perhaps it's good that he died before he got to oldtown. Elsewise the grey sheep might have had to kill him, and that would have made the poor old dears wring with wrinkled hands." "Kill him?" Sam said, shocked. "Why?" "If I tell you they may kill you too" marwyn smiled a ghastly smile the juice of the sourleaf running red between his teeth.

-Samwell V, AFFC.

It is so awful that Sam has infact put the last two family members of Maester Aemon's blood against each other. He is treating Daenerys the way he treated Alliser Thorne when Sam realised if Ser Alliser becomes the Lord Commander his life would be hell so he literally uses Jon & raises him to be a Lord Commander in the hind sight to protect himself. When Jon actually (in the books) decides to fight for Winterfell & take stannis's offer.

Instead, he blamed Jon Snow and wondered when Jon’s heart had turned to stone. Once he asked Maester Aemon that very question, when Gilly was down at the canal fetching water for them. “When you raised him up to be the lord commander,” the old man answered.

-Maester Aemon, Samwell III, AFFC

“Dragons,” Aemon whispered. “The grief and glory of my House, they were.”

- Maester Aemon, Samwell III, AFFC

Not only was Sam's reaction a little over the top but it was wrong how he channeled it upon Jon as well. He ruined the most important revelation of Jon's life because of, again, himself. Jon also didn't seem to care about the fact that daenerys is related to her (lmao) but was more taken aback by Sam suggesting him treason against daenerys.

I do not want to play the oathbreaker, even for good reason.

- Jon VIII, ACOK.

Jon Snow flexed the fingers of his sword hand, remembering all he’d lost. Sam, you sweet fat fool, you played me a cruel jape when you made me lord commander. A lord commander has no friends.

-Jon X, ADWD.

"I had a frightening dream last night, m'lord," Dolorous Edd confessed. "You were my steward, fetching my food & cleaning up my leaving. I was Lord Commander, with never a moment's peace." Jon did not smile. "Your nightmare, my life."

-Jon VI, ADWD.

Daenerys: "We all enjoy what we're good at" Jon: "I don't!"

-GOT, s07e03.

Jon doesn't want to have power for the sake of power. Over & over again in the books & in the show he made it clear he did what he did to fight the Army of the Dead not for a crown.

Jon: "Do you think we can beat the Army of the Dead without her? I fought them sansa twice, you want to worry about who holds what title I am telling you it doesn't matter. Without her we don't stand a chance.. Do you have any Faith in me at all?

Sansa: you know I do.

Jon: she'll be a good queen, for all of us. She's not her father. 

Sansa: no, she's much prettier .... Did you bend the knee to save the North or because you love her?

-GOT s08e01

There are two reasons why anyone would bend the knee.

•Out of fear, fear of cruelty, collapse or death.

•Out of love & respect & trust.

Jon bent the knee to daenerys for the latter, that scene with sansa & Jon was cut off annoyingly leaving the argument hanging but there was more than just love, yes Love is there My god if this isn't what every jonerys stan had been screaming since s07 ended. But there was more than love, there was respect for letting him mine the dragonglass regardless of no existing alliance, there is also trust when daenerys actually not only let him go beyond the wall but also flew all the way there, solidifying the trust he placed in her to come to his aid without an alliance in place. 

Jon glanced over his shoulder. The shadow was there, just as she had said, etched in moonlight against the wall. A girl in grey on a dying horse, he thought. Coming here, to you. Arya. He turned back to the Red priestess. Jon could feel her warmth. She has power. The thought came unbidden, seizing him with iron teeth, but this was not a woman he cared to be indebted to, not even for his little sister.

-Jon IV, ADWD.

But instead he chose to be indebted to daenerys by asking for her help without giving her anything in return. Because he trusts her to be a good, reliable Queen & she won his trust.

Sam: "Don't you know?

Jon: know what?

Sam: Daenerys, she executed my father & brother. They were her prisoners.

Jon: ......

Sam: she didn't tell you

Jon: I'm so sorry. We need to end this war.

Sam: would you have done it?

Jon: I have executed men who disobeyed me.

Sam: you've also spared men thousands of Wildlings when they refused to kneel.

Jon: I wasn't a king.

Sam: but you were you've always been. Jon: I gave her my crown Sam. I've bent the knee am not King in the North anymore.

Sam: Am not talking about the king in the north am talking about the king of the bloody seven kingdoms.

.......

your mother was Lyanna Stark your father, your real father was Rhaegar Targaryen. You've never been a Bastard you are Aegon Targaryen true heir to the iron throne.

.............

You're the true king, Aegon Targaryen, sixth of his name, protector of the realm, all of it.

Jon: Daenerys is our Queen.

Sam: she shouldn't be.

Jon: it's treason.

Sam: it's the truth. You gave up your crown to save your people would she do the same?

She literally did the very thing in s07e06 when she left dragonstone with Drogon, Rhaegal & Viserion to rescue Jon.

Tyrion: "You cant win the throne if you're dead. You cant break the wheel if you're dead."

Daenerys: "So what would you have me do?"

Tyrion: Nothing. Sometimes nothing is the hardest thing to do. If you die we're all lost everyone, everything!"

Daenerys: "You told me to do nothing once before & i lostened to you ... am not doing nothing again."

There are moments in the story both in books & show where we do undeniably see daenerys put the people or her children ahead of her crown.

That morning she summoned her captains and commanders to the garden, rather than descending to the audience chamber. "Aegon the Conqueror brought fire and blood to Westeros, but afterward he gave them peace, prosperity, and justice. But all I have brought to Slaver's Bay is death and ruin. I have been more khal than queen, smashing and plundering, then moving on."

"You have brought freedom as well," Missandei pointed out.

"Freedom to starve?" asked Dany sharply. "Freedom to die? Am I a dragon, or a harpy?" Am I mad? Do I have the taint?

"A dragon," Ser Barristan said with certainty. "Meereen is not Westeros, Your Grace."

"But how can I rule seven kingdoms if I cannot rule a single city?" He had no answer to that. Dany turned away from them, to gaze out over the city once again. "My children need time to heal and learn. My dragons need time to grow and test their wings. And I need the same. I will not let this city go the way of Astapor. I will not let the harpy of Yunkai chain up those I've freed all over again." She turned back to look at their faces. "I will not march."

"What will you do then, Khaleesi?" asked Rakharo.

"Stay," she said. "Rule. And be a queen."

– Daenerys VI, ASOS.

Not that she must or she needs to give up her crown for Jon or anyone so Sam can be convinced with her being a good queen. Fuck that! Sam is being impulsive here (something that daenerys is blamed of, turns out everyone does it) she has on multiple occasions put her people first. Sam hopefully learns it in time because his knows I don't want him to be the A-hole he acted like..

If she had been some ordinary woman, she would gladly have spent her whole life touching Daario, tracing his scars and making him tell her how he’d come by every one. I would give up my crown if he asked it of me, Dany thought … but he had not asked it, and never would. Daario might whisper words of love when the two of them were as one, but she knew it was the dragon queen he loved. If I gave up my crown, he would not want me. Besides, kings who lost their crowns oft lost their heads as well, and she could see no reason why it would be any different for a queen.

-Daenerys VII, ADWD.

A queen belongs not to herself but to her people.

– Daenerys V, ADWD.

The red priests believed in two gods, she had heard, but two who were eternally at war. Dany liked that even less. She would not want to be eternally at war.

- Daenerys V, ASOS.

"We will have it all back someday, sweet sister," he would promise her. Sometimes his hands shook when he talked about it. "The jewels and the silks, Dragonstone and King's Landing, the Iron Throne and the Seven Kingdoms, all they have taken from us, we will have it back." Viserys lived for that day. All that Daenerys wanted back was the big house with the red door, the lemon tree outside her window, the childhood she had never known.

- Daenerys I, AGOT.

She did take a dozen flasks of scented oils, the perfumes of her childhood; she had only to close her eyes and sniff them and she could see the big house with the red door once more.

- Daenerys VI, AGOT.

"He died for me." Dany clutched her lion pelt to her chest. Underneath, a sheer white linen tunic covered her to midthigh. She had been dreaming of a house with a red door when Missandei woke her. There had been no time to dress.

- Daenerys I, ADWD.

"Is it Daario? What's happened?" In her dream they had been man and wife, simple folk who lived a simple life in a tall stone house with a red door. In her dream he had been kissing her all over—her mouth, her neck, her breasts.

-Daenerys II, ADWD.

Dany had never known a home. In Braavos, there had been a house with a red door, but that was all.

-Daenerys III, ADWD.

Soon Dany was as clean as she was ever going to be. She pushed herself to her feet, splashing softly. Water ran down her legs and beaded on her breasts. The sun was climbing up the sky, and her people would soon be gathering. She would rather have drifted in the fragrant pool all day, eating iced fruit off silver trays and dreaming of a house with a red door, but a queen belongs to her people, not to herself.

- Daenerys IX, ADWD.

Isn't it amazing how the very episode in which Sam raises the question "will she give up her crown?" is the very episode where daenerys said this 

She obviously didn't feel at home neither at Dragonstone nor at Winterfell. This romantic moment is the closest to a house with the red door this show has ever done.

Also notice how throughout the episode whenever Jon is speaking to others he refers to daenerys as Queen. But when he is alone with her by that waterfall he refers to her as "a southern girl". Jon loves the girl daenerys not "the floppy ears" of the dragon queen that she wears..

If she had been some ordinary woman, she would gladly have spent her whole life touching Daario, tracing his scars and making him tell her how he’d come by every one. I would give up my crown if he asked it of me, Dany thought … but he had not asked it, and never would. Daario might whisper words of love when the two of them were as one, but she knew it was the dragon queen he loved. If I gave up my crown, he would not want me. Besides, kings who lost their crowns oft lost their heads as well, and she could see no reason why it would be any different for a queen.

-Daenerys VII, ADWD.

"So we pray. I want to plant my olive trees and see them fruit." Does it matter that Hizdahr's kisses do not please me? Peace will please me. Am I a queen or just a woman?

- Daenerys VII, ADWD.

So the point is neither does it make sense for Jon to turn against daenerys all of a sudden for something like a title that he himself just said doesn't matter to him. Given that the third episode is where the battle for dawn is supposed to take place. Iron throne is not on Jon's mind. Plus I don't think Daenerys will be anything but shocked, confused yet happy to find a family member, none other than the son of her elder brother whom she idolizes, she is in love with Jon as he is with her!

A crown should not sit easy on the head. One of her royal forebears had said that, once. Some Aegon, but which one? Five Aegons had ruled the Seven Kingdoms of Westeros. There would have been a sixth, but the Usurper’s dogs had murdered her brother’s son when he was still a babe at the breast. If he had lived, I might have married him.

-Daenerys I, ADWD.

Ser Davos is already planning a better solution to all this. A just woman & an honorable man to probably get married!

Now I need Sam to somehow learn more & more about who daenerys actually is.