#I would go for her with amelia instead of owen and amelia any day

[redhairedwolfwitch]

Doctor Y/n - Attending Orthopedic Surgeon - 5 - Grey's Anatomy x Fem!Reader

Owen smiled softly as he peeked his head into Allison's room, spotting you and Teddy sat on the couch, Allison on Teddy's lap as she held your fingers with an iron fist.

A yawn left your lips, gaining the attention of Teddy and Allison, but you just smiled, shaking your head.

"I have to go into work. I love you both." You explained as you stood up, prying your hand from Allison's grip so you could get ready to go.

///

"If you had told me two years ago that you and I would be excited to hang out together, and babysit six small children..." Amelia chuckled, having sent Leo to go hand out with Ellis.

"I know that Owen asked you to babysit me, since Y/n had to go in for work. You don't have to put on a show." Teddy replied, slipping Allison into the high chair.

"Both things can be true, I could use the company and we don't have to be covered in puke alone... also apparently Jo had a lot of say about you and Y/n and kitchen counters... too soon?" Amelia chuckled as Teddy's eyes widened, a nervous look crossing her face.

///

Braces: we're down to one available ventillator

Braces: so we're closing to trauma

Joey: going into OR, talk after

///

Teddy: any updates?

Y/n: closed to trauma, one ventillator left

Y/n: not supposed to be giving you updates but i'll say you persuaded me

Teddy: what do you think about therapy?

Y/n: i could never afford it, why? do you wanna?

Teddy: maybe

///

Joey: kidney stone removal had complications

Braces: crap

///

Y/n: Pierce figured out two people can safely share a vent

Y/n: trauma's reopening

Y/n: how is it babysitting 6 kids with Amelia?

Teddy: feels like a matrifocal compound

Y/n: goals

///

A laugh escaped Jo's lips as she spotted you, dancing in the hallway in front of Meredith's room. Dancing with everyone else as you celebrated that Meredith was breathing without the vent.

"Hey, come with me to see Luna?" Jo asked, gesturing for you to follow her.

You nodded as you walked over, the two of you heading up to the PICU with smiles on your faces.

///

"Look who I caught in the laundry room whilst we were scrubbing down! I caught myself a Leo fish!" Owen chuckled, picking up the giggling Leo as you headed over to hug Teddy.

"Hey, Zola. We took your mom off the vent today, and she's breathing on her own." Owen smiled, watching as Zola ran to tell Bailey, Ellis and Scout.

Teddy smiled as she felt you wrap your arms around her from behind, holding your hands in hers as you nuzzled into her hair.

///

"Altman, you still have two days off, enjoy them, because you are going to miss them when you're back. Goodbye, Altman!" Webber exclaimed as he hung up on Teddy, leaving her to grab her phone and text you instead.

Teddy: How's Meredith doing

Y/n: she's stable? With Bailey and Jo and Luna rn

Y/n: Hayes kicked us out so he could do rounds

///

"What am I supposed to say to my mentor? Grey's my mentor, I don't want to disappoint her or Bailey or Webber! Crap, trauma, we gotta go!" Jo announced, gesturing for you to come with as Levi headed back to the COVID testing site.

"You tell them that you're following your heart and choosing joy, they can't argue with mental health." You stated as you and Jo headed towards the ER.

///

"S/n, we've got an unstable pelvis and crush injuries, could use ortho!" Owen called you over as the newlywed trauma patients were brought into the ER.

"Scans show an open-book pelvic fracture, but you should get a CT to check for other abdominal injuries." You suggested as you looked over the scans, turning to help Bailey and Owen put a binder on the patient's pelvis.

///

"You're going to give Doctor Grey that speech when she's awake, right?" You enquired, leaning against the wall as Jo stepped out of Meredith's patient room.

"Oh my- yeah, Braces, I am. Now, stop lurking and let's go see Luna!" Jo jumped backwards, realising it was you before a grin crossed her face at the idea of seeing Luna again.

///

"Why does S/n come up here, I thought she was ortho?" Hayes enquired, glancing at you as you pulled on a pink gown over your navy blue scrubs.

"Braces comes up here with me to see Luna, sometimes it's because she misses Allison, but Arizona, she used to work in peds here, Arizona would bring Braces up to the NICU to calm down. Plus, babies love her." Jo explained, smiling as she watched you walk around the PICU, glancing over all of the patients.

///

"If i'm driving, you're cooking tonight." Jo affirmed as the two of you walked down the stairs.

"Wilson, do you have a minute?" Webber enquired, walking over to the two of you.

"Yeah, what's up?" Jo tilted her head to the side, spotting Levi as you subtly passed him a tupperware of vegetable soup.

"Well I was hoping you could tell me?" Webber crossed his arms, raising his eyebrows as Jo blinked in confusion.

"About?"

"Quitting surgery?" Webber finished, leaving you to swallow nervously as Levi all but ran away, only turning back to spot that Jo was holding you in place, in case you tried to run too.

"If you're serious about changing specialities, I want to support you, but I can't do that if I'm in the dark." Webber smiled under his mask, Jo matching his smile as you let out a breath, laughing to yourself as Jo began to explain to Webber.

///

"Owen? I just put Allison in her high chair, Y/n's cooking dinner. Jo's... doing her version of assisting." Teddy explained as she opened the door to reveal Owen on the other side.

"It was Jo who told me to come over, apparently for some dinner?" Owen revealed the text that Jo had sent him.

"Hey! It's time for a barely functional family dinner!" Jo exclaimed, gesturing for Teddy and Owen to come over to the dining room table as you were serving up pasta.

"What is this?" Teddy enquired, passing the garlic bread as you sat down next to her at the table.

"We figured some normality was required, and we don't really sit down to eat. Allison and maybe Leo might enjoy it in the future, if everyone's gathered, y'know." You explained, breaking off a piece of garlic bread with a delightful crunch.

"Remember when you two hated each other? Now you're both eating at the same table?" Jo giggled, leaving you to grimace as Owen gave you a grumpy look.

"Okay, let's not go down memory lane when this pasta is about to get cold! It smells amazing, babe!" Teddy replied, kissing you on the forehead before reaching for the utensils.

A laugh left your lips as you spotted that Allison had pasta sauce around her mouth already, watching her begin to smile in response to your laughter.

///

Tags: @nnightskiess @emskisworld @multifandomlesbianic @thegirlwhowishedeveryonelived @inquisitive-nix @fire-and-blood-targaryen @unexpected-character

[iamwhoami]

Sister Oh Sister (Grey’s Anatomy)

Grey’s Anatomy

   When Amelia has brain surgery to remove her tumor, her sister Y/N is with her the entire time, worried that she might lose her.

Warnings: None

Requested = Yes

Haha...finally got one done...

It’s been a while since I’ve seen the episode where Amelia gets her tumor removed so the facts might be a lil iffy.

You were the first person she told.

   When she paged you to the scan room, you definitely were not expecting this bombshell.

“Oh...Amelia...” You whispered and immediately pulled her into your arms.

“It’s okay...” Amelia said, almost as if she was trying to convince herself to, “It’s benign.”

   You choked back a sob at those words. It was a relief of course, but it was a tumor nonetheless and would definitely have to be removed.

That meant brain surgery.

   Over the next while, you were constantly at Amelia’s side. Yes, it was partially because you knew you had to be there for her, but in a way, you were also there because you were scared.

Scared that history might repeat itself.

   The few months before Derek died, you hadn’t really been around him much. Now looking back, you regretted not visiting him, Meredith and the kids more. You regretted now inviting them over for dinner more. 

You didn’t want to have those regrets with Amelia.

   Despite all your fear and worries though, you did you best to hide it from Amelia, putting a brave face on instead.

   The day of Amelia’s surgery, you had worked yourself up so much that you spent the first half hour of the day throwing up in the bathroom at home.

   You knew you were worried about her, but there really weren’t any words that would truly describe just how great that worry was.

   Pulling yourself together though, you forced yourself to eat some breakfast before heading to the hospital. It was a surprise that Meredith had even managed to get you to go home since you spent all your time at the hospital since Amelia was checked in.

   Parking your car, you killed the engine and was going to walk in when you realized that you couldn’t. You were so overwhelmed by everything that you just needed one moment by yourself so that you could break down without Amelia knowing.

   You didn’t realize how much you had been holding back until you finally let it all out. You were sobbing so hard, you didn’t even hear the first few knocks on the window to your car.

   Sniffling, you wiped your nose with the side of your hand before taking a deep breath and getting out of the car.

“You good?”

   You looked over at Meredith, debating what you should tell her. Should you lie even though you knew she would see right through it?

“I will be,” You whispered, “But that doesn’t really matter right now.”

“Of course it matters,” Meredith responded, “Y/N, you’ve been driving yourself insane with worry about Amelia and I know you have your reasons but how would Amelia react if she knew what you’ve been doing?”

“What am I doing?” You asked numbly as you and Meredith headed into the building.

   Meredith grabbed your arm, making you stop, “You’re not taking care of yourself Y/N. Your running yourself to the ground, you’re not eating, you’re not sleeping.”

“It’s going to be okay,” You whispered back, biting your lip as you felt the tears threaten to spill from your eyes again, “Right? She’s going to be okay.”

“Oh...Y/N,” Meredith reached out her other arm and pulled you into a hug.

   You choked back a sob, “She has to be okay Mer because I swear I can’t do it again. Not after Derek...”

“I know,” Meredith mumbled and put her hand on the back of your head, rubbing it up and down.

   With that, you nodded and Meredith looped her arm through yours before making your way up to Amelia’s room.

“I’ll go through the a sub frontal craniotomy, real clean, small incision,” Tom was saying as you and Meredith arrived.

   Amelia saw you and gave you a weak smile which you just barely were able to return.

“So I imagine you have questions,” Tom looked at everyone expectantly.

“Yeah uh...how many of these have you done?” Dr. Bailey pointed her finger at Tom.

   Tom shook his head slightly, “So...so many.”

“What’s the recovery time?” Richard added.

   You tried to listen. You tried to pay attention, stay engaged, but your mind just kept wandering, going through each of the possible scenarios. 

“See you at the afterparty,” Tom was saying when you zoned back in and without another word he walked out of the room.

“He’s arrogant and a showboat so DeLuca, make sure you ask him questions during surgery,” Amelia ordered, “Make him show off.”

   DeLuca nodded in response and you knew that he would do that.

“And if I make it through,” Amelia started to say but Owen cut her off.

“When you make it through,” He corrected.

“Early ambulation protocol,” DeLuca finished and Amelia thanked him.

   Amelia then turned to Meredith, “Meredith...if I die.”

“You are not going to die,” Meredith said.

“But if I do,” Amelia went on, “You call my mom...I’m sorry but she likes you.”

“True that,” You snorted, knowing fully that Amelia was very correct on that.

   Amelia then looked over at Maggie, “And you...take my room! I totally scammed you on that.”

“Don’t be ridiculous-” Maggie started to say but Alex cut in.

“She’s right on that, it’s way better,” Alex mumbled to Maggie.

“If I’m gorked after this,” Amelia took a deep breath, “Unplug me. Don’t think about it. Go on with your lives. If I need unplugging, April has been named my power of attorney.”

   At those words, everyone, including you, slowly looked over at April who had a very awkward expression on her face.

“What...was I supposed to say no?”

“I uh...I don’t know what’s me and what’s tumor talking,” Amelia looked you straight in the eyes before continuing, “But uh...in this moment, I love you people tremendously.”

~~~

   You were sitting in between Meredith and Maggie, watching through the gallery at the scene below. Amelia standing...leading the superhero pose.

   You watched as Amelia got onto the table and as she was preparing to lay down, she gave you a wave.

   Forcing a smile, you waved back.

~~~

   The entire time Amelia was in surgery, it felt like you were underwater. Not drowning, but just underwater. The sounds around you were fuzzy and even though you could see perfectly well, your eyes stung as if salt was irritating them. You were subconsciously holding your breath too, breathing only when Maggie or Meredith reminded you to.

   When the surgery ended, you were slightly relieved but now you were tasked with one of the hardest things.

Waiting.

   You refused to leave Amelia’s side, even though she was still unconscious. Meredith and Maggie tried to get you to leave for food, but you brushed them off, only leaving to use the bathroom.

   You talked a lot to Amelia while you waited for her to wake up, knowing that she couldn’t hear you. It brought you some sort of comfort though, speaking to her as if she were awake.

“I know you’d tell me that I’m being stupid,” You laughed, holding Amelia’s hand in yours, watching her face carefully for any signs that she might be waking up.

   You smiled painfully, “But I can’t leave you Amy...not after what happened with Derek. You can’t leave me...because I really need you Amy. Even though I’ve been annoying and you’ve been a pain in my ass at times, I love you so much more than I’ve ever told you.”

   You reached your hand out and gently stroked your sister’s face.

“Please Amy...” You swallowed hard, “Please don’t leave me.”

~~~

   Needless to say, when Amy woke up speaking French, you thought you were going to have a heart attack. When Meredith explained what was going on though...you quickly understood and calmed down.

A little bit.

   It was hard watching Amelia be in pain while she recovered from brain surgery but you always put on a brave face and made sure to be there beside her every step of the way.

   It took a while, and since you were with Amelia every day it was hard to see the tiny steps of progress, but you did. It felt like forever, but you knew it wasn’t, before Amelia was finally allowed to be discharged and head home.

“I’ll put the bags in the car first,” Owen said and looked over at you

   You smiled and Owen gave you a knowing look before walking out of the room, a few bags in his hand.

“You look like crap,” Amelia joked as you rubbed your bloodshot eyes.

“Right back at you,” You mumbled back but Amelia could tell it didn’t have your usual spunk.

“What’s wrong?” Amelia asked, clearly concerned.

   You shook your head, “It’s stupid...”

“Oh come on Y/N,” Amelia said, “It’s me, you know you can tell me anything.”

   You sighed and shook your head again but you didn’t stay quiet this time and told Amelia what was bothering you.

“It’s just...especially after Derek,” You felt yourself start to choke up and quickly swallowed hard, “I couldn’t lose you. I was so scared I would lose you too Amelia.”

   Amelia’s gaze softened as she realized what you meant.

“Come here...” Amelia whispered and opened her arms so that you could lean into her embrace, “It’s okay...I’m okay now. You’re not going to lose me.”

   You nodded and closed your eyes, “I know...but it was just hard...”

“I don’t even know how hard that must have been for you,” Amelia said and you felt her sigh, “But you know...you can’t get rid of me that easily.”

   You couldn’t help but shake your head at your sister’s attempts of trying to make a joke.

“I know, you’re like a barnacle,” You went along with Amelia’s attempts.

“Seriously though,” Amelia whispered, “I’m always going to be with you no matter what.”

   You nodded, “I know...I love you Amelia.”

“Love you too.”

[kaimelia]

Hi, In Twitter and tik tok I see photos about Megan coming back to grey’s for Teddy and Owen

Wedding. Can you write something about Amelink in the wedding ? Please

last hope

a/n: me realizing you probably wanted fluff but. im a sucker for an amelia/teddy friendship and also angst!

"The day that was over ten years in the making," Amelia muttered, bringing her flute of sparkling water up to her lips. "Congratulations."

"Things finally feel right." Teddy glanced over at Amelia. "Thank you for everything you've done. I know these past few weeks haven't been easy, but this wedding wouldn't be happening without you."

"Who am I if I don't help plan my ex-husband's wedding?" Her eyes trailed to the dance floor, where Owen was dancing around with Leo in his arms. "Third time's the charm."

"Did Tom say anything to you?"

"He asked me to remind you that he's a plane ride away and that he has access to a private jet, so say the word, and he's on his way," Amelia wiggled her eyebrows. "He asked me if you were happy, and I said you were, and he said that he's happy for you."

"That doesn't sound like Tom."

"He did also add that you would be happier with him, but I was leaving that out for the sake of the moment."

"He keeps asking me about you," Teddy started softly. "Says you won't talk to him about what's going on and that he's worried about you."

"That also doesn't sound like Tom," Amelia laughed gently and looked over to see Teddy's stern expression. "He's seen me through bad times. And, I don't like to think about those, so I don't respond when he asks about me."

"If you ever wanted to talk to someone, I'm here, you know? Or if you just need a friend. I know what it's like to feel like everyone hates you."

"I'm guessing Link told you?" Teddy nodded slowly, a slight grimace across her face as she took a sip from her wine glass that lasted a second longer than it should've.

"He did, but I'm also assuming there's more than his side to the story. There was when I was in my own situation, and you were one of the only people to look out for me. You didn't have to do that, and yet, you did."

"He won't listen to me," Amelia whispered, her gaze trailing out to where Link was talking with Jo. "He won't even let me speak; he just shows up to get Scout and then drops him off like we're complete strangers."

"Owen did that to me, and then you went and yelled at him, and now we're here. Do you need me to go yell at Link?"

"No, not yet, at least." She looked down at her glass, swirling the small amount of drink left around. "I just want things to go back to the way they were last year. Even in the beginning of COVID, we had a nice thing going, balancing all of the kids and everything, and I just want that back."

"What happened?"

"Shouldn't you be dancing? It is your wedding, after all." Teddy waved her hand in dismissal and shrugged.

"I'm not a big party person. And, I know that talking to you right now is probably the only way I can escape the crowd of people because I look busy."

"Fair," Amelia muttered. "Things just fell apart. It was like, at first, we always had opposite work schedules, and when we were both home, one of us was leaving for work. And then, he got caught up with Jo and making sure that she was settled to get custody of Luna and everything, and it was like I became less and less important to him." She traced her finger over the top of the flute. "He stopped checking in, and it honestly seemed like he stopped caring about how I was doing, and then he proposed."

"And you said no."

"I didn't say anything. I couldn't say anything; I mean, what was I supposed to do? Fall into a marriage where we don't care about each other but still wear our rings? That's not what I want Scout to grow up thinking is love."

"Do you still love Link?" Amelia sighed, and her hand moved to the charm on her necklace, the one Link had gotten her for her birthday this past year. She ran it between her fingers.

"I don't know."

"Do you want to fix things?" Another sigh, and she looked up towards the roof of the tent shielding them from the night sky.

"When things were good, our relationship was the best thing I've ever had. But when things aren't good, I can't even explain what it did to me." She looked over at Teddy. "He just doesn't understand what it's like to be an addict. Or, he doesn't try to sympathize with it."

"The thing I've learned is that sometimes, you have to put yourself first. You have a child, and you want him to grow up learning how to take care of himself and be his own person instead of being completely tied to someone else. I spent years idolizing what my relationship with Owen would look like, and when we finally got to that point, I didn't recognize myself as a person." Teddy placed her hand on Amelia's shoulder. "Don't lose yourself because you want your relationship to look a certain way. It won't work for either of you." She set her wine glass down on the counter behind them. "By the look on Evelyn's face, I don't think I can hide over here any longer. But, Amelia, anytime you need something, I am always here." She walked away, trailing her hand down the neurosurgeon's arm as she left.

Before she even realized it, her feet were leading her towards where Link was standing, and suddenly, she was right in front of him with her arms dangling awkwardly by her side.

"I'm gonna go," Jo muttered, stepping away after raising her eyebrows at Link.

"Amelia?"

"I want to fix things," she started, clasping her hands together and subconsciously picking at her nails. "I miss us and the way things used to be before it all fell apart, and I know that maybe we can somehow get that back if you'll listen to me and promise not to ignore what I need because I don't want to get married and I'm not going to change who I am so much to the point that I forget who I am for you." She exhaled heavily, trying to read the expression on Link's face.

"Why are you doing this right now?"

"Because I need you to hear that and stop going around and telling everyone that I'm selfish and rejected your proposal because I don't care. We both know that's not true." Link dropped his head down. "You know how difficult these past few months have been for me; why would you think it was a good time to ask me to marry you?"

"Because we needed some joy, and I thought being engaged and planning our wedding would be that joy. All you had to do was talk to me and let me know that wasn't what you wanted."

"And all you had to do was check-in with me like you promised you would do before ever proposing!" Amelia bit her lip after speaking, noticing how the people around them had turned to look as their conversation increased in volume. "Link,"

"We shouldn't be having this conversation here," he muttered, picking up his wine glass from the table. "I'll find you later."

She felt a hand on her shoulder and turned around to see Maggie standing there with a sad smile on her face.

"Let's go home," she spoke quietly, taking Amelia's hand and leading her out of the venue.

"He hates me," Amelia muttered. "He hates me, and it's like it isn't even him anymore. That's not Link; Link would never act like this, right?" Maggie pursed her lips.

"I don't know."

"I had hope. I finally had hope, and I thought that if I went up to him and was clear about what I need, he would understand, and we could work on fixing things, but he didn't want to understand." She stopped walking. "What the hell did I do wrong?"

"You didn't do anything wrong, Amelia." Maggie approached her and took her hand again. "I promise. You didn't do anything wrong. Sometimes, things just don't work out, and you don't need him to be happy."

"But I miss him," she whispered. "I miss his kindness, and how much he cared about me, and how no matter what happened, he would just wrap me up in his arms at the end of the day and tell me that everything would be okay. He would always listen and be the one steady thing in my life when everything else was falling apart." Maggie sighed softly.

"Amelia, you'll always have me, I promise. And if he doesn't care for you, if he won't listen to you, then he doesn't deserve you." She tugged lightly on Amelia's hand, and they resumed their slow pace until they arrived at the car. Maggie opened the passenger door, and Amelia slumped down into the seat.

She rested her head against the window, finally allowing tears to silently fall from her eyes and watching as the car drove away from her last hope.

[amelialincoln]

We're Still Standing

She hadn't realized she had fallen asleep until she was being shaken aggressively out of subconsciousness. Amelia opened her eyes drowsily and realized immediately how cold she was. It took her a minute to adjust to the dim light illuminating from the lantern that hung beside the swing on the porch.

“What the hell are you doing? I was worried sick.” Her boyfriend’s familiar voice rang from above her and she felt his warm, oversized jacket wrap around her shivering frame. Amelia blinked at him, trying to recall why she was on Meredith’s front deck. Oh shit.

“I’m so sorry,” she slurred, shaking her head out of its daze. “I drove to Mer’s out of habit and I must’ve passed out.”

“We’ve been living in the apartment for two weeks.” His tone was firm and he stretched out a hand to pull her off the uncomfortable wooden swing. “Did you--” She knew what he was going to say before he had the chance to finish.

“No, no, I’ve actually barely been thinking about it since I started working again. I think my body is just still adjusting to the long hours.” She accepted his hand and glanced at her dim phone screen. It read 2:50am. No wonder he seemed so shaken up. She bit her lip, trying to hide her guilt.

“Oh, really?” He paused, trying to find the right words, cautious as always. “You seemed like you were struggling with it a bit while we were living at Mer’s.”

“I haven’t taken that much time off work since I was an intern, other than when I was using,” she explained as he opened the car door for her. “My sobriety depends on being able to fill my time with things I’m passionate about. I’m just getting back to feeling like myself again.”

“Okay…” Link replied, shutting the door gently and climbing into the driver’s seat. He pulled out of Mer’s driveway and waited until they were on the freeway. “So this has nothing to do with the conversation we had last night?” She was almost taken aback by how well he knew her. After spending almost every second together, over the last couple of months, she could barely keep anything from him without Link somehow noticing when something was wrong.

“It's just kind of a lot to put on someone,” she muttered.

“What do you mean?” He asked, glancing at his girlfriend who was twisting pieces of her chocolate brown hair nervously.

“It’s just that the expectation of me to be popping out your babies all the time is a bit overwhelming,” she glanced out the window as Link merged into their usual exit. “I just got back to work, Link.”

“Hey, I’m sorry. I was just getting excited. I didn’t mean like now.” He placed a soft hand on her thigh and felt her relax slightly. “We talked about having other kids a lot while we were at Meredith’s. I’m sorry if I jumped into the future too quickly.”

“Meredith’s was a different time. I was really hormonal and barely had time to actually process what was happening.” She forced a grin which made him raise an eyebrow.

“Well, how many of our conversations and decisions were made when you were hormonal?” He turned to look at her and watched her gaze fall. “All that stuff about marriage and houses and massive backyards?” He was dancing around the four kids that she had specifically outlined to him as her preference.

“Link, you and Scout are enough for me. I don’t need anything else.”

“Don’t need or don’t want?” He asked as he pulled into his apartment’s parkade. “Those are two very different things, Amelia.”

“Can we talk about this in the morning? I’m not thinking straight right now,” she answered honestly.

“Yeah, whatever you want.”

[][][]

Amelia was awoken the next morning to Scout being placed on her bare chest. Sun streamed in through the shutters of their third story bedroom and the glittering light from the ocean reflected like shards of glass on the white walls of the room. Link’s apartment was utter perfection, with a perfect view of Elliott bay and situated on a central, but not too busy, street close to downtown. It made her question why he was itching to move out so fast and start building the house he’d been fantasizing about for the last couple of weeks.

“Hi baby,” she smiled as Scout’s blue eyes stared up at her sleepily. He was always the most cuddly in the morning and she shifted to a position where he was able to wrap his pudgy arm around her neck. “Where’s your Dadda?” As if on cue Link strolled into the bright room, his long hair was disheveled and his face wore a hint of exhaustion. Probably from being up all night searching for her, she realized. He held two steaming mugs of coffee and the scent hit her forcefully as he held it under her chin for her to take a small sip.

“He’s been missing you a lot lately.” He lowered himself onto their bed gently and placed both of the mugs on the side table. “Ma ma, ma ma, all day long.” She laughed at his decent impression of Scout’s latest attempts at talking. “You think with all the time he’s spent with Dadda,” he spoke the word loudly at his giggling son, “He’d start liking me at least half as much as you,” Link joked.

“Mama’s boy.” Amelia shrugged, pressing a kiss to the top of her baby boy’s head and suppressing a yawn.

“Bailey texted you not to come in because neuro is slow today but she put you on call. I turned off your alarm. Thought you might need the rest.” He explained, his voice free of judgment. “You also got a call from our health insurance place. Our plans are ending in a week and we’ve still got some credit so I called the pharmacy to renew your birth control prescription. I noticed your pack this month was almost finished.”

“Oh,” she turned to face him, suddenly reminded that she needed to take her pill. “Yeah...thank you.”

“No problem.” He shrugged. “I can probably pick it up sometime today.” He handed her the cup of coffee, reading her thoughts before she could even ask for it and watched as she swallowed the tiny pill down.

“Link, it’s--” “Fine,” he shrugged. “I don’t have any expectations of you, Amelia. I know you went through a lot with Owen,” he made a face she didn’t recognize before taking a large gulp out of his own mug and clearing his throat. “I don’t want to make you feel trapped or obligated to fulfill my own selfish desires. It’s your choice and I’m not going anywhere...unless you want me to,” he paused, allowing her space to speak if she wanted to before continuing. “I was an only child and it was tough. It would’ve helped to have a sibling to lean on during my parent’s divorce and I guess that’s my own stuff that I should probably work through instead of pushing you into a situation that you don’t want to be in. I’ve seen you go through hell with your sisters and I understand where you are coming from. Most of all, I’d never want to force you to quit the thing you love doing the most. I also think that would be doing a disservice to the world because my girlfriend is a freaking superhero and she’s got hundreds upon hundreds of people to still save. So can we just pretend that everything I selfishly said to you didn’t happen? Cause I usually don’t like to talk everything out but I was up all night trying to put how I was feeling into words and I still feel like I did a shitty job.” “Now you know how I feel all the time,” she laughed, slipping her hand into his and wishing she could erase the stress that was radiating from him. “Screwing up while trying to get my point across is my specialty.”

“That’s not true, you’re one of the most well spoken people I know.” Link rolled his eyes, taking another sip of his coffee and looking a little bit more relaxed.

“There’s a lot of people who would say otherwise,” Amelia joked, pulling their duvet up to Scout’s shoulders as he began to fall asleep on her chest. “You weren’t being selfish,” she finally sighed. “If anyone’s not being fair it's me. I feel like my mind is switching up on me a hundred times a day. Since I’ve had the tumor I find myself constantly second guessing myself, trying to figure out what I want. Some days all I want is to be a mom. I feel like having Scout has made me become a better person and a better surgeon and I wouldn’t change that for the world. I don’t regret having him for even a second. Every single part of me loves him...and you. To the point where when I am at work, where I am usually at my happiest, I still find myself missing the both of you. Which scares me because there’s never been a doubt in my mind at work that I’m not exactly where I want to be. And I know for a fact that if we were to have another baby, or two or three, that I would find myself not being able to compromise between my love for operating and my love for my family. I know I would have to choose. And I don't think that I can. At least not right now.” Link nodded his head in understanding. “But when I can, you’ll be the first to know,” She laughed, causing him to grin.

“Well, I would hope so.” He rolled his eyes, pulling her closer to him gently, careful not to wake their sleeping son before pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. "I'm not going anywhere, Mia, and I'm not going to force you into anything. So for the love of god, stop running and just tell me how you feel because it's going to take a whole lot more than not wanting another baby right now to scare me off."

[jazy3]

Thoughts on Grey’s Anatomy: 17X7

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

They did it! I can’t believe it! They actually killed DeLuca off! I’m so happy right now! As long time readers will know I have never been a Andrew DeLuca fan and I speculated back in the summer that they might be planning to write his character off after it was revealed that the planned finale for Season 16 included an explosion that was supposed to claim the life of one of the characters. I speculated that DeLuca was the most likely candidate with Tom and Jackson being the most likely runners up because I felt that they had gone as far as they could with DeLuca’s character and there wasn’t much left for him to do on the show.

Add that to the fact that the actor who plays DeLuca said a bunch of stuff to the press last year where he spoiled some pretty major plot points and stated that he knew things about where the show was going when he hadn’t even read a single script for the season yet and I was pretty sure his days were numbered. That being said, the show had teased us a bunch of times about firing, killing, or writing off the character during seasons 15 and 16 and they never went through with it so a big part of me was skeptical that they ever would.

But it turns out I was right! His days were numbered and they wound up killing him off in the Mid-Season Premiere! I’m still in shock. It hasn’t really sunk in yet to be honest. This episode honestly made me wish we’d gotten to see the remaining episodes and finale of Season 16 as planned. Based on what we know it looks like the plan was for Richard, Bailey, Meredith, and Carina to stage an intervention, DeLuca was to go away and get treatment and return to the hospital only to die tragically in an explosion.

Season 17 would have opened with the characters finding out about that and mourning his death and I think it would have been interesting to see Meredith navigate that as in the Finale Hayes asked her out and she said yes. It seems likely that if the COVID-19 Pandemic had not hit when it did and shut down production and altered filming for this season we would have seen Meredith and Hayes go out for a drink and start dating.

Seeing Meredith navigate the loss of her ex-boyfriend who she was no longer close to while in the beginning stages of her relationship with Hayes would have been very interesting and I’m sorry we didn’t get to see that. I’m also sorry that due to safety restrictions Meredith and Hayes haven’t had much screen time this season, but it looks like that’s about to change as I’ll get into a bit later.

Back to the episode at hand. I never liked DeLuca as a character and I hated him with Meredith so I’m glad that they killed him off and that we never have to deal with that nonsense again. I’m glad that they caught the human trafficker Opal and took those people down. I was never super invested in that storyline so I’m glad they wrapped that up. I feel so bad for Carina though. She’s a great character and is wonderfully acted by Stefania Spampinato.

My heart broke for her in this episode because while I won’t miss her brother I know that she will and will be absolutely gutted when she finds out that he’s died especially after she worked so hard to get him help and treatment for his Bipolar Disorder. I’m glad she has Maya there to support her.

LOL at Bailey sleeping through the whole damn episode! What did I miss indeed! That poor woman slept through DeLuca getting stabbed, almost dying, not dying, having surgery twice, and then actually dying as well as the other shenanigans going on at the hospital. I loved that she was asleep at Meredith’s bedside especially after they spent a good chunk of Season 16 fighting.

I also feel really bad for Richard in that he’s obviously grateful that DeLuca helped save his life and wanted to help and when Owen turned him down because it wasn’t a good idea for him to scrub in Richard lurked in the background in the OR gallery the whole time to make sure that everything was okay. Plus he can’t talk to Meredith about it right now because she’s in a coma which must be so difficult for him. The extra stress also puts his sobriety at risk and that worries me.

I got to be honest I am struggling to understand Teddy’s point of view this season. She’s being really awful! She’s being cruel to Tom. She was cruel to Owen. I don't know what Teddy expected to have happen. Both Cristina and Amelia walked away from their marriages to Owen and moved on with their lives in large part because they realized Owen was in love with Teddy and always would be.

And then she finally gets what she’s wanted all these years and the minute she realizes Amelia’s baby might be Owen’s and not Link’s she runs back to Tom and has a several months long affair with him and then drops him like a hot potato as soon as she realizes that the baby is Link’s and after Owen finds out about the affair she refuses to talk to Tom for months and then comes crawling back to him and wants to be his friend after Owen makes it clear he wants nothing to do with her. WTF?

I feel bad for Tom. I really like his character. He’s super interesting and complex and he deserves better than someone who treats him like that. Tom is a good man at heart and he treated Teddy like gold and in return she’s done nothing but break his heart and stomp all over him when he’s already down. He deserves someone better. I’ve never been an Owen fan, but honestly Teddy is behaving so horribly I’m on his side on this one.

They had some great scenes in the OR together, but Teddy clearly read too much into it. Every time he gives her a crumb she’s convinced he’s forgiven her and wants to give her a second chance and that’s not it at all. Owen has been clear. He doesn’t forgive her and he doesn’t want to get back together with her. All he wants is to co-parent peacefully and work together as colleagues because he values her skills as a surgeon. That’s it.

It was cute to see Teddy Face Timing with Leo. I’m glad they are finding safe ways to incorporate the kids into the story. Speaking of which, the scene where Amelia and Maggie tell Zola that her Mom has been placed on a vent and she might not come off it was heartbreaking. That kid has grown into her own as an actress and really holds her own in that scene.

Her line about how she didn’t want them to tell Bailey or Ellis yet because they’re too young to understand broke me heart. Zola’s only a few years older than them but she’s old enough to understand the impact of what’s happening in a way that they can’t. And she remembers how hard it was when Derek died. When Cristina left. When Alex left. She doesn’t want to put her siblings though the same thing especially when Alex’s departure is still so fresh for them and they never got a chance to really know their Dad. The fact that Zola can recognize that at such a young age is raw and heart breaking.

We saw Winston and Maggie reconnect this episode which would have been super hot and enjoyable if Meredith hadn’t just been put on a ventilator! The scene where Jackson showed up looking for Maggie was too funny! I loved the scenes with Jackson, Link, and Winston in the backyard having beers! Winston has a great sense of humour and seems to be a calming presence. I like the idea of those three being friends.

Link’s face when he realized that Winston doesn’t know that Maggie and Jackson used to date and are also step-siblings. I’ll be interested to see Winston’s reaction when that comes out. I loved Link’s rant about how worried he was about Meredith and what her declining health and potential death was doing and would do to Amelia. Did anyone else catch that he called Amelia his wife? I’m calling it. They’re foreshadowing an Amelink wedding!

I liked hearing Jackson talk about how Meredith is family and they’re all worried and Winston’s comments about how all they can do is just keeping moving physically and metaphorically. I’m also loving Amelia and Maggie’s wardrobes this season. Their sweaters in this episode were gorgeous! Hats off to the wardrobe department! They’re looking good!

I loved seeing Jo and Hayes work together again because I love their friendship, but to be honest I was expecting more of the friendly teasing and banter of last season where she egged him on about Meredith and they traded barbs. Their scenes in this episode were a lot more intense and agitated. She totally played him with that line about Meredith.

He kept saying no to taking Luna to see her Mom and so Jo made it personal for him. If Meredith asked to see her kids Hayes would never say no and he would move heaven and earth for her. By making that connection Jo got him to agree to her plan. I also love that the reason he kept saying no in the beginning was because of what happened to Meredith.

She went from laughing and joking to being put on a vent and he doesn’t want to run the risk with any other patient and it’s obviously eating him up inside. He misses her. He cares about her and he’s clearly terrified about the possibility of her not waking up. That being said, Jo’s line where she compared Alex leaving her for Izzie because he found out he had kids he didn’t know he had and sending her a heartfelt letter to Hayes spending years watching his wife and the mother of his two boys die of cancer was way out of line. Super not okay. I really think that Jo is going to adopt that baby. I think that’s why they are setting up her interest in OBGYN.

In other news, Nico is still a terrible boyfriend to Levi. I honestly don’t know why Levi puts up with him. Levi really shone in this episode I think. He felt responsible for what happened, but instead of bungling things and making things worse like he might have done in the past he got out of his own way and asked Dr. Khan who was a vascular surgeon in Pakistan prior to immigrating to the U.S. to take his place.

I feel like this episode implies that the Beach is limbo now as I don’t know how else DeLuca could have ended up there as he wasn’t someone who was close to Meredith the way that Derek, George, Richard, and Bailey are. Not sure how I feel about that as I was kind of liking the is it a COVID dream is it the afterlife ambiguity.

Onto next week’s promo! I’m not excited that they appear to be setting up an episode in which the other characters mourn DeLuca’s passing as none of the other characters apart from Carina were really that close to him. They spent the last two seasons establishing that everyone hated his guts, considered him a nuisance, and only put up with him because they had to. So to me the other characters mourning him doesn’t feel authentic or real. It just feels forced.

There are several things I am excited about though. Seeing Maggie’s reaction to his death I think will be interesting. She was visibly upset and ran to his side when Alex beat him up in Season 13 and mourning the loss of your ex-boyfriend who you were no longer close to while being in a committed relationship with someone new I think is an interesting dynamic. She’s kinda standing in for Meredith here because she’s on a vent.

I’d like to see Catherine support Richard and make up for her horrible behaviour last season. And the best thing of all: Hayes!!! In the promo trailer we see Hayes sitting at Meredith’s bedside talking to her about how she needs to fight and how they all need her to fight. Bring it on! It’s about damn time! And Derek’s back and he’s … fishing? I’m excited to see what happens there and if they actually get to talk and have a real conversation this time. It has also been announced that Sarah Drew will be returning for a cameo as Dr. April Kepner this season so I’m excited for that!

Until next time!

[geekkatsblog]

Grey's Season 17x8 review

I'm kinda late but I haven't been sleeping lately so I finally managed to catch up with the episode today.

I'm still in shock from last weeks episode honestly but let's go. First I'm expressing my disappointment on the lack of Carina, she's a series regular on Grey's but all her scenes were on Station 19, I wish they would have brought Maya to Grey's just so I could feel good about seeing them cash in their regulars card. Then Deluca was laid to rest, another heart breaker seeing that they had just opened the realms of possibility for him and storylines but they just killed him off instead.

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Teddy

Teddy the biggest storyline at this point besides the funeral. At last we get to see what's really going on. Teddy hasn't been looking herself for a long time and it seems like Deluca's death was the breaking point for her, she was so scarred she didn't even want to wean Meredith off of the vent and when things are affecting your decisions as a doctor and not for the better, it's not a good sign. We'll get to see more of the storyline next week which honestly I'm excited to see. She managed to make me feel for her because despite everything she's done she's still the same old attachment barbie under there. I'm just glad Owen was able to put aside their differences and pick her up bridal side to take her home. The only thing I'm hoping is that it actually happens to be what the trailer was suggesting and not another Denny and Izzie situation because enough of the Grey Sloan doctors have had cancer and I'm definitely hoping that hey end the love triangle between her Owen and Tom or the better scenario in my opinion is let her get some space to breath and deal with healing without the pressures of relationship added to it.

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Meredith

Meredith honey, I'm gonna need you to take several feet away from Mc Dreamy, your kids and the hospital need you and you're getting a little too close to him for comfort. On that note I was once again glad to see Patrick Dempsey bless my screen as Derek Shepherd and it was as always a treat. When he talked about the kids, I'm so glad he knows about Ellis and they got to have several deep chats, so much so that I almost fell into the trap of wanting them to touch. She took a breath on her own which makes it seem as though she's improving but I don't want to get my hopes up and then have them trampled again like in the situation with Deluca waking up after surgery and then Meredith waking up only to end up on a vent in the same day.

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Bailey

I'm so glad that she's taking some time off. She's been running on empty since her mother died and she was beginning to remind me of the time with when she tested herself over and over again for staph with how obsessed she was about Deluca's autopsy, however with the amount of her fellow doctors she's lost its understandable plus Meredith the only one of her residents left is still on life support. If it wasn't for Richard she would have done some serious damage especially to Teddy who already was on edge. She definitely doesn't handle trauma well but besides Richard and Meredith she has experienced the most trauma. She's been through a lot and sometimes I think I tend to forget that.

And at least we got to see that small scene between her and Ben at the end so that was a plus.

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Richard

Is still holding up the walls of the hospital. It must be so hard for him to keep his faith with all he has been through, like I said before him, Meredith and Bailey have been through hell and back so I can definitely understand him feeling a little lost and losing his faith. However he didn't let that affect his keeping the Grey Sloan family together. I'm glad him and Catherine managed to make up because both of his support people are going through things of their own (Meredith and Bailey) so I was glads that she was able to be there for him and he didn't have to consider the thought of alchohol because that would just be too much at this point.

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Amelia and Link

Are doing really well right now as a couple, which scares me because whenever something seems to be going too well for a couple they throw a storm at them and I'm not ready to see their happy bubble burst just yet.

And Amelia has grown a lot her talking to Zola, she just said the right things. Mother hood as really changed her for the better. And does anyone else really want to see the letters that Zola wrote for Derek?

Link however felt the pressures of taking care of 4 kids constantly and I can understand I help out with my niece sometimes and by the end I want to pull my hair out and sleep in a corner for a week, farless 3 kids and a baby, I'm surprised he lasted so long.

Link headed to Jo's house in the middle of whatever agreement Jackson and Jo have going and got drunk. What I really liked about it though was that he went home afterwards and when he did Amelia didn't judge or yell she just talked to him and then hugged him which was amazing. They have a level of communication on the show that most of the other couples lack and it just works so well for them.

___________________________________________

Jo and Jackson

Jackson discovered just how much of a close friendship Link and Jo have and at some point he almost seemed as if he was jealous. Let the complications begin ladies and gentlemen. Plus there is the apparent potential of Dr Haynes turning it into a triangle. I guess one triangle dies to form another 🙄 and let's just say I'm not too excited for it.

Jo allowed herself to get drunk and vent which in my opinion was a step forward atleast. She hasn't really gotten the time to grieve over Alex because suddenly Covid happened and she was swamped with work. I'm just hoping that she does so that she won't accidentally sabotage any upcoming happiness she may have with someone else she needs to heal.

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Maggie and Winston

Poor Winston, he really doesn't know what he's signing up for by joining Grey Sloan does he 😭? Although I noticed last week he seemed to be getting the picture when Link was talking about Meredith and Derek. On the other hand seeing him with the kids was adorable, and he managed to give everyone some time to themselves without the kids which was a very big contribution. He's reminding me of a Ben which in no way is a bad thing. Go on Maggie get it.

Maggie was also devastated and shocked by Deluca as we all were and I'm so sad how their slowly but surely introducing her to the traumas of Grey's. She literally is the only pure one left and now she has to go through all the trials of the hospital until she's dark and twisty. I hope not though she's the only cheerful non broken one left on the show.

___________________________________________

Owen

Is about to have his hands full by next episode. He really is beginning to redeem himself after all Teddy did to him the whole episode he spent trying to make her feel better about Deluca and then picked her up to carry her home which confirmed my theory of it was always going to be Owen for Teddy, it was always Owen and Teddy even when she was married to ....... Henry 😭. I hope this will be the end of the over worked love triangle and they'll finally be able to move on especially Tom who deserves it.

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Haynes

Is utterly smitten with Meredith's children and was begging her to wake up and fight and surprise, surprise she took her first breath on her own. Honestly out of all the potential suitors for her which really isn't much considering one of them has now joined Derek as a permanent member of the beach, Haynes isn't a bad choice, I'm beginning to actually ship them. But then Krista said she was sensing a potential triangle with Jo, Jackson and Haynes and I hope not. I'm tired of the triangular pyramid of Grey Sloan love triangles. Just once I would like a relationship to be straight forward. They killed Deluca and the Teddy one is coming to an end, no need for another.

___________________________________________

Tom

Is still recovering from Covid and he seems to be going to live, a plus in the series so far.

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Levi and Nico

Are slowly getting closer, but I'm not rooting for anyone until Nico apologizes and they have an actual conversation about what happened without their clothes ending on the floor.

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Helm

Also was having a hard time coping and dealing with a bit of guilt about her over ambitious surgery hungry self. She actually reminds me of Cristina in a way, which is why I want Tom to be her teacher I really think their personalities will bounce well off of each other, especially in the episode where she had to check on Tom when he had Covid.

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Questions

• What's going on with Teddy? Owen said in the trailer he sees it in soldiers a lot but Grey's has a knack for reusing plots and her seeing Deluca is giving major Denny Izzie vibes, plus there's the chance that if it really is a brain tumor they'll pin all her recent choices on the tumor.

• Will someone tell Meredith they're are beaches in the real world as well, sure Derek won't be there and it probably wont be as peaceful but all I know is she needs to wake to hell up.

• What's going on between Jo and Jackson will they become more? Will they add Haynes to the mix?

• And most importantly when will Carina finally be seen in the Grey Sloan hospital? I need more Dr Carina.

[omeliaendgame]

Just call me

Hey Omelia-Fans :-) After last weeks episode I got an idea for a new story, so here it is. I hope you´ll like it!!!

Warning: It deals with Amelia´s addiction.

“Amelia?”, Owen asked surprised as he opened the door with only a tshirt and boxer shorts on. He just had changed his clothes to go to bed until it knocked on the door. “I´m so sorry!”, Amelia said almost crying. “For what?”, Owen asked and tilted his head, “Come inside.” He laid his hand on her shoulder. “I don’t wanna bother you.”, Amelia said quietly. “You don’t. Come on…”, Owen replied worried by the look on her face. “What happened?”, he asked as soon as they had sat down. “I´m just…I…needed to see someone…well you.”, Amelia answered quietly. “Okay...Why?” Owen asked slowly. He knew her too well to not notice that something was going on. She didn’t answer and he decided to give her some time. She looked at Owen and he immediately saw guilt in her face. “I…am this close to taking drugs and I don’t know what to do about it.”, she said and smiled slightly to hide how hard it was for her to tell Owen about it. Owen froze for a second, just because he hadn´t expected that to be Amelia´s problem. “Yeah I know it is bad.”, Amelia said. “That’s not…Do you have drugs with you?”, he asked carefully. Amelia shook her head. “I…was just on my way. It´s crazy that I didn’t end up with that junky doctor.” She admitted, “I don´t know how I made it to your house.” Owen exhaled slowly, relieved that she apparently hadn´t taken any pills.   “I´m so so glad that you came here, Amelia.”, Owen said. She began sobbing and Owen wrapped his arms around her. He could imagine how hard it was to stay clean in this times and although the last time he saw her she seemed to be good, he knew that her history with addiction would always be there. “What do I do, Owen?”, Amelia asked when she had calmed down a little, “I can´t do this anymore. I have talked about it in meetings, I have talked to Link. Nothing helps.” “You came here instead of buying drugs. You resisted your desire for drugs. You are strong, Amelia.”, Owen said looking in her eyes. “I don’t know for how long I can keep going on like this. I fight my cravings since weeks and at first…I only thought about drugs at night,… then always when the kids weren´t there and now…I think about them all the time. Like now, I still think about them now…I can´t guarantee you I won´t just stand up, run away and get high.”, Amelia confessed. Owen didn’t know what to say. It was hard to hear her say that. “Okay, so let´s find out why.”, Owen said. “Why I want to get high? Isn´t that obvious…”, Amelia asked sceptically. “Well…let me rephrase that. Let´s talk about the things that are bothering you so much that you have to fight your addiction more than before. You might know the reasons for your cravings but let me guess, you never talked about it.” “How can I talk about it when every single minute there is a child around me.”, Amelia replied. “Soo...you ignore your feelings because you don´t want the kids to worry?”, Owen asked. “I don´t… Their mom is at the hospital since what…weeks? Months? Of course I don´t want them to worry.”, Amelia said frustrated. Owen smiled slightly. “What?”, Amelia asked. “That sounds like you.”, he answered, “You care so much about your friends and family. I always thought that. But don´t forget taking care of yourself.” Amelia looked at him with tears in her eyes. “I tried to. I told Link I was sad...I...He is like… happy all the time and it freaks me out! How does he do that? He plays his guitar and dances with the kids and sometimes I really enjoy it. Sometimes. And when I talked to him, he was caring and supportive, but...he didn´t get it.” “How about you tell me what you wanted to tell him.”, Owen proposed. “There is a global pandemic. People are sick, people are dying. Meredith is sick, and I thought she was dying too. And some people just make the whole thing worse by murdering other people. All I do right now is staying at home, receiving messages from Maggie about how Meredith isn´t improving, receiving messages from Tom about how many of our patients died that day, because either they got Covid or there wasn´t place for them in the ICU. And then I have to entertain the kids in order to not make them ask me when they can see their friends again and when their mother is finally coming home. Oh and every time I think I have just one minute of peace, Scout starts crying.”, Amelia opened up. Owen nodded slowly. “You don´t have time to process all the feelings, they build up and now you just want to numb yourself… I think I get it. Sometimes I feel like that too.” “But you don´t think about taking drugs.”, Amelia added. “No, I don´t.”, Owen said quietly. “So how do you process your feelings?”, Amelia asked. “Process is the wrong word. I don´t process them. But I accept them... It´s hard for all of us. We´re all sad and angry and the worst thing is that the quarantining makes us feel all alone. But we´re not... Let me tell you what happens if you take these drugs. You will get the high you think you need. You won´t feel all of the pain until the drug´s wearing off. You will remember all of the pain, you will feel guilty for taking the pills, for not being strong enough to resist and you will feel worse than before. You will take more drugs and more and more and more. But it will never make you feel better in the end. It will make you feel more alone. If you accept your feelings, in the end you will feel better. Because this pandemic will get better. There is and end. If you do drugs, there isn´t.” Amelia kept silent. He knew that she was thinking about the things he said and he hoped he got through to her. “It makes me crazy that we don´t know when all of this is gonna get better. We keep going on for days, weeks, months and everytime we think the worst part is over, boom, more deaths, more quarantining, more crime.”, Amelia said after a while. “I know. It´s scary.”, Owen replied, “Instead of doing weekly online meetings about how to improve digital technologies they should do weekly meetings about how to improve mental health.”  “Yeah that sounds reasonable.”, Amelia said. “Really, when I was in quarantine I found myself talking to my mirror image for like 15 minutes.”, Owen told her. Amelia chuckled. “Reminds me of Ellis, how she talks to a picture of a girl in the kitchen when nobody can play with her.” “Yeah but her doing that is sweet.”, Owen answered. Amelia laughed. “It is. She´s adorable. And Zola is just so smart and kind, and Bailey... is so funny. They have changed so much in the last few months. Even if I´m with them every day I notice that.” “And you would miss it if you...”, Owen started but knew he didn´t have to continue. Amelia nodded. “I think I came here because I knew inside that you were the only one who could stop me from buying these drugs.” Owen smiled. “What if I lose control?”, she asked. “Just call me. You can call anytime! I´m sure I have hundreds of reasons to convince you to stay clean. And I will tell you every single one of them if you need me to.”, Owen said. “Did I ever tell you how grateful I am to you.”, Amelia said, “Really… I don´t know how to thank you." “Just promise me that you´ll call.”, Owen said. She looked in his eyes and smiled slightly. “I promise!”

[momowoah]

Thoughts after 17x10 (obviously contains spoilers)

Beach scenes: I didn't cry when Derek appeared, I nearly cried when George appeared, I got really sad with Deluca and Lexie, but the one that made me cry was Mark. Seeing him and Lexie together again was amazing. As someone who already knew they were going to die due to the plane crash in s8 finale since my first watch of s5, the worst part of their relationship was that I knew they were wasting their time, and I'm glad they think the same now. It's a shame they weren't closer in the beach, but oh well. The mentions of Callie, Arizona and Sofia also made me happy. Hopefully, no more beach scenes.

Cristina's "appearance": I think it's kinda of a odd choice to have her keep in touch with Owen about Meredith instead of someone else they know (like Bailey or Jackson or Hayes), especially after last episode. Teddy's "dreams" about Owen were really on point. Sadly, I think we won't get any Cristina besides that, so even that little moment was really good.

Teddy and Amelia: Even if it's a good idea to have Teddy stay with someone who cares about her, I don't think Owen's intentions were good (Teddy herself said he put her with Amelia bc he doesn't trust her to take care of their children - which gets worst when you remember how they handled the child situation in season 16. Teddy stayed at home, and Owen took a more challenging job the day after he offered to stay at home with the children. Yay. Also, I don't think I remember seeing him ever holding Allison, but I do remember him having Amelia take care of his childrens. Anyways, I'm going off topic). Teddy should really let Amelia in, bc rn it seems like she thinks Amelia doesn't actually like her when she clearly does. I love their friendship, and I hope they get closer to each other.

Owen/Teddy/Tom Triangle: I think the last ep killed pretty much every hope for Towen as a couple (Teddy's last words for him in the "dream" before it changed to her and Allison were her realizing she was never going to be enough for Owen), but I think we will get to see them forgiving each other and becoming friends again, especially since they have two children together. Tom, on the other hand, seems to have realized/decided something on this episode. I think he will come back to Teddy, but I don't know how she will respond. Still, they seem more likely to happen than Towen, which makes me happy. It doesn't look like Owen resents Tom anymore and Tom seems to be trying to have a good relationship with him, so Owen might support them if Toddy decides to get back together. Yay.

Hayes and Jo: Ok so... What is going on between them?? Like, obviously something is going to happen, but I still don't know what. The only thing I can imagine by now is a type of love "square" with the two of them + Mer and Jackson, but that would be crazy. I thought for a second it would be Hayes blaming Jo for Irene's death, but it doesn't seem like she's going to die. I'm losing my mind over this. I have absolutely no idea about what will happen between them. But something definitely will.

Jo and Jackson: Not sure about Jo, but Jackson will 100% catch feelings. He's already, I think. Never was a fan of Jolex and I don't want Japril to get back together (loved while it lasted, but also love the fact that they didn't end up together), so I kinda ship them. I'm also really liking Jo this season.

Winston and Maggie: I'm not usually the first one to be happy when a couple gets engaged after less than a year together, but it's different in this case. There are couples, like Marshall and Lily from HIMYM, that are clearly meant to be from their first on-screen moment. Winston and Maggie are one of them. I know some people think there's something sketchy about Winston, but honestly? This is the first time I actually like a ship with Maggie, and I really think they just clicked. Might be wrong, but I hope not.

Preview: Jackson's face in the preview kinda made me thing April will come back next week and it won't be as a doctor, but I'm probably and hopefully wrong. Also, Link proposing is really unexpected. He keeps running away from stuff and I feel like he will run away for real some time, so not a big fan of Amelink. Don't think Amelia will say yes though. I like crossovers, but it means I won't be able to watch the episode until two days after it comes out (as it takes at least two days for people to sub Station 19 and I can only watch Grey's live), so that sucks. Anyways, it seems like a good ep.

Amelia and Link: He ran away when he thought Scout wasn't his, he ran away again when he felt overwhelmed. He came back both times (he only left for a day the second time, but still), but he did ran. I don't get why he's proposing when he already can't stay during hard times. Totally think Amelia will say no, because lately she has been the most reasonable character in the whole series. Also, something about her face both in the preview and when she hugged Link at the end of the episode makes me think something will happen. There's also been hints that she and Owen might get back together somehow, so there's that too. I honestly don't see any of these two relationships going somewhere though.

[jobrookekarev]

Little Moon

Chapter: 1/?

Words: 1083

Summary: Jo knew from the moment she held Luna’s hand that she had to protect her from becoming the foster kid that she was. So Jo adopts Lina and this is their lives together as Mama and Little Moon.

Basically, this is a series of little moments with Jo and Luna.

Fandom: Grey’s Anatomy.

Characters: Jo Wilson, Luna Ashton, (Side: Cormac Hayes, and Amelia Shepherd.)

Rating: Gen. Audiences.

Additional Tags: Fluff, all the fluff, Parenting, Babies, NICU Baby, Foster Care, Jo being a Mom! Other characters to be added.

Read at AO3

Read at FFN

…………………………………………………………………

Jo had been standing between the NICU incubators as she waited for Heyes to get out of surgery with Luna. She rubbed her hands together so hard that she had broken the gloves she was wearing and had to grab a new pair. The second she saw Hayes with the incubator Jo went to Luna’s side and watched her every move. The little bit of relief that she felt hearing that the surgery went well and that Luna was doing good, was overshadowed by the grief she felt for losing Val. 

Val's words replayed in her head. All she wanted was for her daughter to be held. It hit so close to home because Jo was Luna. She was the baby left in a stroller at a fire station with no mother to hold her. All babies need to be held, especially motherless babies. 

Jo stripped off her gloves and rubbed the hand sanitizer over her fingers before she opened the little window in the incubator. She pulled back the blanket that Luna was swaddled in. Her tiny arm was barely the size of Jo’s finger. She reached in to hold Luna’s tiny hand as it barely wraps around the tip of her finger. 

Most newborns have a grasp reflex. It’s a death grip where they just grab onto your finger and won't let go. Luna’s fingers touch Jo’s in the lightest grip she had ever seen in a preemie. Luna doesn't have the grasp reflex, she’s too young to have any reflexes, but Jo still held her hand because Val’s last wish was that her daughter be held and although Jo can't pick her up, she held her hand.

She sees Luna's eyes open, although she still squints at the bright lights of the NICU. Jo grabbed the blanket and put it over the warmer to shield her eyes. Luna had just reached 29 weeks gestation making her three weeks old and her awake periods were getting longer. Especially since she gained half a pound since she was born.

“Hi Luna,” Jo whispered to her as she watched Luna react to her voice.

Luna stretched out her arms and let go of Jo’s finger. She always reacted to Jo’s voice whenever Jo talked to her. She would kick or move her arms even turning her head towards her. Jo captured Luna’s finger again and gently hung on to her. 

“I've got you, Luna, I know your Mommy is gone, but I've got you.” 

Jo knew the protocol for NICU babies whose parents died or gave them up from her days on Peds as a resident. She knew that a CPS worker would come in soon, but because of the pandemic things had been slow and Luna's not going anywhere. Any CPS issues would be handled over the phone, but Luna would need a guardian immediately. Jo looked up to see Hayes at the nurse’s station on the phone and she could faintly hear him talking with the CPS worker. 

She knew that Luna would become a foster kid like she was. Maybe she would get adopted, maybe she would have a good life, but Jo knew from experience that that wasn't always the case. Luna could bounce around from home to home because nobody wanted a baby with health issues. Jo had to fight for Luna. She didn’t know how but Luna needed somebody and Jo was there. She could fight for Luna like she couldn't fight for Val. She could protect Val’s daughter, now that she was gone. Jo could be there for Luna and advocate for her like somebody should have for her, when Jo was a baby. 

Jo wasn’t sure how to protect Luna, but there were people close to her who would know what to do. She hated to have to leave Luna’s side, but luckily she didn't have to. Jo pulled out her phone and dialed Amelia's number. Amelia didn't pick up right away and the phone rang a few times before she picked up.

“Hey Jo, now's not really a good time can I call you back?” Amelia said, and Jo could hear the stress in her voice.

“Yeah, no problem I just have a couple of questions for you about your fostering process with Leo. I’m still at the hospital so no rush. Just call whenever you're available,” Jo said with a nod as she looked down at Luna again. 

“Thanks, you know, why don't you try Owen. He's the one who applied to foster Leo in the first place.”

“Okay, yeah, thank you,” Jo said before she and Amelia quickly hung up. 

Jo looked down at Luna again, she had calmed back down and closed her eyes. Jo called Owen, but unfortunately, he didn’t pick up. Jo put her phone away and figured she would try again later. She ran through a mental list of other people she thought she could call, there was Meredith, but she was on a vent. Bailey who although technically didn't foster Joey, she still had the experience. Yet, Jo didn't want to bother the chief. Especially as the last time Jo checked, she was still asleep and Meredith's room. 

The one thing Jo hated about the pandemic was how far away everyone seemed. The only person she took her mask off around was Levi or Jackson and because Scout was still a newborn she hadn’t even held him since before the shutdown. She hadn’t seen Link in weeks and even then it was with a mask and six feet apart. 

She wanted to get things moving as quickly as possible, but she knew from experience that this process would take time. Luckily for her, Luna would still need to be in the NICU for a number of weeks, so instead Jo looked down at her and held her hand.

“I've got you, Luna, okay. You're not going anywhere and neither am I. You're going to stay right here and everything's going to be okay, I promise.” 

Luna's eyes opened as she heard Jo's voice and Jo smiled down at her as the tears collected in her eyes again. She was going to stay there and hold Luna’s hand until  Hayes kicked her out at the NICU, but as she looked up and caught his eyes across the room she knew he wouldn't. Jo looked around and grabbed one of the extra stools before she sat down and stared at Luna still holding her hand. Jo wasn't going anywhere.

[ugly-crying-over-bucky-barnes]

Field of Poppies Part 22

Summary: After being apart for six years, childhood friends Tommy and Amelia reunite under odd circumstances. Tommy is an outspoken young man and Amelia is pregnant and out on the streets. The bond of family can be unbreakable but it is tested often. Especially when Europe descends into war.

Part 22: Another Christmas without Tommy. Yet bright days are just around the corner. 

             “Did you know Alexander? He used to work down at the butcher’s shop before he was drafted.”

            Amelia was in the betting shop working alongside Rosie, Danny Owen’s wife. “I think so. Was he the one married to that Italian girl?”

            “Right, she passed some time ago from the flu.” Rosie nodded. “Well, he came back few months ago.” She reported. “They just locked him up in the asylum last week. Martha was telling me.”

            “The asylum?” Amelia looked up from her ledger in alarm. “Whatever for?” From the brief time she’d known the young man, he seemed like a decent person without anything seemingly off about him.

            “He went off his rocker. Had a gun and was threatening to shoot his own brother.” Rosie looked concerned. “They said he still thought he was in the war. They couldn’t convince him otherwise.”     

            “Jesus.” Then pen slipped from Amelia’s hand a bit. She couldn’t imagine what sort of horrors could change such a nice man. What could possibly cause someone to lose their mind completely? And would Tommy come back the same?

            After almost four years of waiting for him, she couldn’t imagine having to lock him up to protect others and himself. Because Alexander’s case wasn’t some anomaly. There were many stories drifting quietly around Birmingham of the men who came back. Once upstanding figures in the community came home different men. There were two men that Amelia knew had committed suicide. Their families were distraught. They had waited so long for them to return, were so happy they came home alive, and now they had to bury them.

            It made Amelia so anxious. Of course, she wanted Tommy home but what could she do if he was nothing like the man that had left her that day at the train station? How could she explain that to her children?

            “It’s a shame,” Rosie said quietly. Both the wives were thinking about their husbands. Hoping, that maybe by some sheer luck, their boys would be okay. But it seemed foolish to even hope.

 ~~~~~~~~~~

            It would be another Christmas without Tommy. It never got any easier, although Amelia tried to make do. Annie’s awareness of Tommy’s missing presence was becoming more of an issue. There were only so many times Amelia could explain why he was gone. The almost-four-year-old was unsatisfied with the answers. She didn’t understand war, didn’t understand why her father was gone, and especially struggled with why he couldn’t just come home.

            A week before Christmas, the Shelby household was in chaos. A loose thread on Annie’s teddy bear had caught on one of the kitchen cabinet handles. Instead of trying to unravel it from the metal, the young girl pulled and pulled until her darling stuffed animal had a loose arm hanging by a thread.

            Annie screamed and cried, inconsolable as she cradled her bear close.

            Amelia tried to calm her down, saying it wouldn’t be an issue to stitch the thing up again. But her daughter wasn’t listening. She wouldn’t even let go of the bear so Amelia could fix it.

            “Love, please, it’ll be okay!” Amelia begged for her daughter to calm down. “Mummy will fix it and he’ll be as good as new. I promise.”      

            “But daddy gave him to me!” She sobbed.

            “I know, but I can fix him.”

            “Daddy’ll know I hurt ‘im!” She wailed and thrashed about on the kitchen floor. “Daddy’ll hate me!”

            “Annie Shelby, what on Earth gave you that idea?” Amelia asked.

            “’Cause…’cause he will!” She didn’t seem to have any basis for how she felt. “That’s why he won’t come home!”

            “Now you listen to me.” Amelia gathered her up into her lap. “Your father loves you very much and if he could come home, he would in a heartbeat.”

            Annie began to calm down in her mother’s arms. She hiccuped and wiped her eyes and nose on her sleeve. “Teddy’ll be okay?” She asked.

            “Of course, I’ll patch up his arm and he’ll be looking nice for Christmas.” Amelia kissed her cheek. "Now go head upstairs. It's nearly bath time." 

~~~~~~~~~~

            As they always did, they got through the holidays and made it out alive in the new year. Amelia was struggling to write down the date sometimes.

            1918

            How could it only be two years away from the new decade? And more importantly, would she be welcoming 1920 still without Tommy. Max would be ten by the end of 1920. By then he would’ve spent more than half his life without his father. It made Amelia sick to her stomach to think about.

            She just didn’t realize good news was around the corner.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~

            Annie and Max were running around the parlor while Amelia cleaned up after dinner. The two were sick of being cooped up inside because March had brought on endless rain.

            The phone started to ring and Amelia called out from the kitchen. “Quiet down, you two, mum needs to answer the phone!”

            It didn’t do much good. The kids were leaping off the sofa and creating a big ruckus.

            Still, Amelia picked up the receiver. “Shelby Residence.”

            “Mel?”

            For a moment, Amelia was convinced she was in a dream. There was no other explanation for why Tommy’s voice would be on the other end of the phone. Her knees went weak and she clutched onto the stair banister nearby. “Tommy?” She gasped. “Is that really you?”

            “Yeah, love. It’s me.”

            It felt like her heart was in her throat. There was so much she wanted to say to him and yet she couldn’t find the words. “I-I don’t understand.”

            “They’re sending us home. All of the 179."

            Tears began to stream down Amelia’s cheeks. This was the day she’d been waiting years for. Now that it was time, she couldn’t contain her happiness. “Really? Oh, Tommy…I-I don’t know what to say. I’m over the moon!”

            “I know, love. I can’t wait to finally be back home with you. I don’t have much time on the phone, are the kids there?”  

            “Yes, yes I’ll get them.” Amelia turned from the telephone. “Max, Annie! Guess who’s on the telephone!”

            The two rambunctious kids ran into the hallway to see what she was talking about. “Who?”

            “It’s daddy.” Amelia knelt down and held the receiver to them.

            “Dad?” Max was cautious, unsure if his mother was just pulling his leg or not. Although he figured it would be too cruel of a trick for his mother to play on him.

            “Hello, Max. Your sister there too?”

            “Daddy?” Annie piped up. She looked thrilled but nervous at the idea of speaking to the man she’d never met.

            “I’m coming home soon, you two,” Tommy announced happily. “Are you excited? I’m going to be coming home on the train next month.”

            “Really?” Max’s eyes widened in shock. “For good?”

            “For good,” Tommy promised. “You’ll be at the train station waiting for me, right?”

            “Yeah!” Max couldn’t hold back his grin.

            “Alright, well, I’ll be home very soon. I love you all very much.”

            “We love you, Tom,” Amelia said tearfully before the line went dead. She hung up the receiver, her hand trembling.

            “Aren’t you happy, mummy?” Annie asked.

            “Of course.”   

            “Then why’re you crying?”

            “I’m just so happy.” Amelia pulled her children in for a tight squeeze. “He’s finally coming home.”

Permanent Tag: @papa-geralt-of-cirilla @biba3434 @kimmietea @karmezii @enrapturedbythemoon @vampgirl1997 @tarafaithe @evelynshelby​

Tag list: @shelbyblinded​ @hanster1998​ @xxbeckybeexx-blog​

Masterpost

PB Masterlist

[doc-pickles]

maybe I don't quite know what to say

Hey so uhhhhhh ✨I just did a bad thing✨ no but really I woke up out of a dead sleep to type up a brief summary of this in my phone notes because I dreamed this up. And I already hurt Lay so I’m sorry about that. But uhhhhh enjoy this little S13 AU. Or don’t.

I didn't know if you'd care if I came back

I have a lot of regrets about that

Pulled the car off the road to the lookout

Could've followed my fears all the way down

TW// Discussion of Abortion

He doesn’t mean to look at it, he’s looking for labs for his own patient when he sees the file. The folder is taunting him as his fingers hover over it, the bolded name being the final straw.

Trying to rationalize his actions, he tells himself that his sentencing this morning is what makes him open her test results. He was curious and worried, why the hell was she getting labs done on herself? It could’ve been a system error, but as soon as he opens the file and sees her birthday printed under her full name he knows it’s not. He scans the papers, looking for anything out of the ordinary. He almost misses it, the spike in her hCG levels so high that there’s no doubt in his mind what they mean.

He makes quick work of gathering his own test results before he barricades himself in the nearest supply closet. Chest constricting tightly he knows he’s in the middle of a panic attack as soon as he struggles to pull in a complete breath. The feeling is foreign, something that hasn’t plagued him since he was a young boy huddling underneath the dining table praying his dad wouldn’t hear him shushing his siblings' cries.

The thought of his dad made his heart clench, fear ripping through him like a hurricane as he entertained the idea that he might end up being just as crappy as his own father. If his head was screwed on right he’d know that he could never treat any child of his the way he had been treated, but he’s not thinking logically as he hyperventilates in a closet thinking about his impending fatherhood.

He was going to be a father. A dad. There was going to be another human that depended on him. He’d created another life with a woman he loved more than he could say and who currently wasn’t speaking to him and he might be going to jail. Before he can process it he’s leaning over an empty bin and puking, the fear and anxiety coursing through his body winning out.

Eventually he goes back to work, though he can hardly remember it. His body is on autopilot as he finishes his shift and drives back to Meredith’s house. When his brain finally decides to let him process everything that’s been spinning through it for the past few hours he finds himself standing in the shower under a cold spray of water with tears streaming down his face.

How had he fucked up this badly? How had he ruined things so utterly and completely between them? He should be at home with her, celebrating this unexpected surprise with their favorite takeout as they laid across the couch talking about their future. Instead there were miles of Seattle between them and even more distance between their hearts as they both struggled with their new realities. He with the prospect of facing jail time for his rash actions, her with the potential that she could end up a single mother because of what he’d done.

At the end of the day he knew it all fell on his shoulders, he knew he was to blame for fucking them up so royally. Despite knowing that he was to blame for the disaster their relationship had become, all Alex wanted was to hold Jo close and not let go.

-

It’s later that same day when he approaches Amelia and Owen’s new home that he sees her again. He doesn’t want to upset her, but the knowledge of their impending parenthood spurs him forward. Her eyes dart up to meet his as she tries to avoid answering his questions. She’s mad, he knows she has every right to be but he can’t help but want to talk about it.

“Jo... I don't want to go in there. I want to be home with you,” her expression is telling, they’re not on the same page. She doesn’t want him home. “And I messed that up, and I know that, and I'm sorry.”

“You can't just say that, Alex,” there’s tears shining in her eyes as she looks at him. “It doesn't fix anything. Sorry doesn't fix all of this.”

He knows he needs to bring it up, that he needs to ask her about it because it’s burning through him like a hot coal, “I’m trying to fix this, to fix us Jo. I want to... I want to because I know.”

“Know what?”

“That you’re pregnant,” he takes a step forward and she takes one back, tears welling up and threatening to spill over onto her cheeks. “Please, I want to fix this so we can move on and work together. We’re having a-“

“That doesn’t matter,” her voice is hoarse, she clears it quickly before she speaks again. “It’s not going to matter by this time tomorrow.”

It takes him a moment to process what she’s saying but when he does his knees almost give out. She’s not keeping their baby. They’re staring at each other, both of them crumbling inside as they try to hold back their true feelings.

“Jo, please-“

“Please don’t make this harder than it has to be. I’m trying so hard not to involve my emotions because I just... I can’t do this right now Alex,” she looks away from him, eyes falling to her feet as the emotion she claimed to be pushing aside spewed out of her like a rupturing volcano. “We can’t do this right now and I need you not to try and talk me out of it.”

“Jo, baby, come on. We can work this out,” his voice is verging on desperate as he reaches for her, their fingers brushing for only a moment before she takes another step back and presses her hand against her mouth. “You know I’ll let you do whatever you need to but we can work this out. Please. I don’t want to-“

“No! We’re barely speaking and I screwed everything up, I can’t bring a baby into that! I can’t be selfish and screw up another life no matter how much I... I can’t do that, I’ve been here before and I’ve made this choice before. I can do it again I just need you to leave,” sobs interject her words as one hand presses against her still flat stomach. Her words aren’t making sense, he doesn’t understand what she’s trying to say but his heart is breaking as he realizes just how terrible things between them have gotten. “I need you to walk away because if you look at me one more time I won’t be able to do it and I need to, I have to do this.”

He realizes then that she doesn’t want to do this, she doesn’t want to go through with an abortion but she think it’s the only way out. His heart breaks as he lets her walk away, letting her leave with the knowledge that tomorrow there wouldn't be any hope of a future between them.

Alex sits with his guilt and tears and the overwhelming pain building in his heart until his pager beeps and sends him back to the hospital. He wants more than anything to drive to the loft and hold Jo and tell her things will be okay but he knows he has to let her go. He has to let her do this because he’s the one that got her there.

-

The night is hell. Bailey has shunned him and basically fired him, his career is slowly dwindling away to nothing, and any hope he held for his relationship is now gone. Alex stays within the walls of the hospital as long as he can, but when the morning light seeps in and his exhaustion comes with it he knows he needs to drag himself into his own bed before he collapses.

When he walks up the steps to the frat house, he’s shocked to see Jo sitting on the porch swing. Her body is almost curled in on itself, Alex’s heart sinking as he realizes she had probably already done it. He drops his bag by the door, her eyes moving up immediately at the sound.

“Hey.”

“Hi,” Jo’s voice is incredibly quiet as she picks at a thread on her sweatshirt. A quiet sob breaks through as she wraps her arms around herself. “I’m sorry for showing up here, I didn’t know where to go.”

Alex sighs, leaning against the door as he stares at her with an aching in his chest, “It’s okay, you’re probably in pain. I get it.”

She shakes her head, a few curls falling out of her loose bun as tears build up again and she begins to cry in earnest now. Alex takes a step forward, wanting to wrap her up in his arms and comfort her, but not knowing if he should.

“I’m not mad at you, you don’t have to cry,” his voice is quiet as he kneels in front of her, one hand settling on her knee. “It’s okay, I get why you did it.”

“I didn’t... I couldn’t do it,” Jo’s cries get louder as she tries to force out the words, Alex’s heart stopping as he listens intently. “I just sat in the parking lot and couldn’t move because I kept thinking... about us and how this, this baby didn’t do anything wrong. And how loved they would be, how many people they would have to hold them and worry about them and make sure they were okay. So I left and I came here and I... I couldn’t do it. I know we’re both so fucked up right now but I want this. And I’m so sorry.”

Her body slips off the swing and into his embrace, Alex’s arms moving to cradle Jo against him as she desperately sobs against his chest. His heart is beating wildly now, relief coursing through him as he realizes that Jo had chosen them and their baby. The little life that they’d made out of love and that was still growing steadily inside of her.

His eyes close as his own tears begin to fall, his lips brushing against her forehead as he realizes how much they have to work through. He wants to though, for her, for them, he’d do anything. He knows that much.

[redhairedwolfwitch]

Doctor Y/n - Ortho Fellowship - 8 - Grey's Anatomy x Fem!Reader

You were lucky the elevator was fast enough that you couldn't break down crying in it without getting caught by an unwilling stranger just wanting to take the lift.

The air was cold as the wind hit your skin, your pantsuit wasn't the warmest material, but you'd chosen it since it was your favourite colour.

Another issue was that you had just walked out of a party where you had been driven to by a person still up there.

You were waiting for a taxi when everyone started evacuating because Jackson's penthouse apartment was on fire.

"Y/n, are you okay?" Teddy spotted you standing up the street.

"Waiting for a taxi." You whimpered, swiping at the trails of tears that were still making it down your face.

"Owen should not have said those things, not to you, let alone in front of everyone we work with." Teddy admitted, her hand running up and down your back in an attempt to comfort you.

"He's right though. What parent can I be when I didn't have any?" Your voice cracked as you looked Teddy in the eye.

"My parents abandoned me on the side of the road to freeze, for goodness sake!"

"You can be better. Be a better parent than the ones you had. The bar's pretty much at the floor anyway." Teddy replied, pulling you into a side hug before the taxi you ordered arrived.

///

Waking up the next morning, your eyes ached and your mouth was dry. You'd managed to change from your pantsuit into pyjamas when you got back home last night, to the empty apartment that you'd lived in since you were an intern.

A whimper left your lips as you poured a glass of water, eyes flickering over the photos on the fridge.

There was a photo that Jo had taken of you and Hannah Brody on there, but there was also a photo you and Leah had taken when the two of you went on the date to the Space Needle.

Now you were stuck trying to deny that you were in love with someone who wouldn't love you back, because the timing was wrong.

The timing was always wrong.

Plopping down on the couch, you frowned as you found your discarded phone. The screen was cracked and the battery was dead.

Plugging your phone into charge, you ditched your shirt on your bed, walking into the bathroom to take a shower.

Your phone was at 21% by the time you were walking out of the bathroom in a towel.

3 Missed Calls from Amelia

2 Missed Calls from Callie

5 Missed Calls from Joey

8 Missed Calls from Teddy

4 Missed Calls from 'Zona

57 Unread Messages

You scoffed as you glanced through the messages, leaving your phone to sit on the coffee table as the thoughts washed over you again.

The timing was never right. You were never going to find someone who loved you. You would never be a good parent.

///

You were lucky you had a couple of days off booked, because you weren't in the mood to face the rumour mill.

That didn't stop everyone texting you with updates about the hospital though.

///

Joey: Alex's mother started giving us baby hats

Joey: baby hats that are extra big because he had a big head

Braces: good luck pushing that out of a very small hole

Joey: not helpful!

Braces: let's be real, if the head is that big, you'll need a c-section

Joey: even more not helpful!

///

Joey: we are never having a cringey handshake

Braces: we hug instead?

Joey: I miss your hugs, when are you coming in to work?

///

Amelia: who knew the adoption system was so complicated

Y/n: why do you think i aged out instead of being adopted?

Amelia: is that a rhetorical question, because...

///

Joey: does it bother you that you don't know anything about your biological parents' medical histories?

Braces: i got genome tested when Bailey had the lab, years ago. couldn't open the envelope though

Joey: i think i'm going to get my genome examined. Do want to do a new kit?

Joey: Alex thought i was worried about his genes, but I'm terrified of mine

Braces: i couldn't open the police report either, i still have that too

Joey: you've had the police report on your parents since when?

Braces: I got it all when I turned 18, i got the police report, the guilt money started and i got the legal proceedings on how my relatives in Chicago got out of having to take me in when I was 10

Braces: those three envelopes, plus all my childhood trauma, are why i don't think i'd be a good parent. just like Hunt said.

Joey: Braces...

Braces: I'll take a kit, but I don't know if I can look at the results

///

Teddy: haven't heard from you in a while, are you okay? do you want me to come over?

Y/n: thought you'd be in palm springs with Koracick

Teddy: no, i've been sat near the lacrosse field, it's not the same when you're not throwing lacrosse balls at the goal, but it's relaxing

Y/n: i'm going to test my genome, but i don't know if i'll be able to read the results

Teddy: do you want me to come over?

Y/n: yes please

///

"Hey." Teddy gave you a soft smile as you opened the door to let her in.

"Hi," ignoring her eyes following you, you headed towards the window seat, sorting through the cushions. Teddy watched as you picked up a gift bag, passing it to her before you sat on the coffee table.

"I bought that for you, for the baby, but I never got the chance to give it to you... I lost my nerve after what Hunt said. He basically yelled all of my insecurities at me in a room of friends and co-workers, and Joey..." You rambled, turning back to continue re-arranging the cushions as you heard Teddy opening the gift bag.

A cuddly lion plus some lion themed baby clothes were in the gift bag. You didn't see Teddy break into a smile at the gift, or how she glanced up to spot you rearranging something else.

"So, you rearrange things when something's bothering you. I'll remember that." Teddy remarked, quirking a brow as you quickly turned around, like you had been caught red-handed.

"Y/n," Teddy patted the empty space on the couch, prompting you to walk over after a moment of hesitation, "give me your hand."

Teddy's fingers were soft as she entwined hers with yours, bringing your palm over to rest on her bump.

"What are you-oh!" You cut yourself off as you felt the kick, your eyes meeting Teddy's as she smiled at you, nodding as you raised your eyebrows.

"Is she... does she always do that?" You asked, chewing your lip in thought as Teddy held your hand.

"When she's awake, she calms down when you play guitar and sing..." Teddy admitted, looking down at her bump as you reached for your guitar.

"Can I?" You offered, gesturing to the guitar as Teddy looked up at you, her face lighting up.

"Yes, yes, yes please."

Your bottom lip was held between your teeth as you focussed on hitting the right notes, clearing your throat to begin to sing, you didn't see how intently Teddy was watching, or how she was giving you heart-eyes.

///

Jo paused in the hallway as guitar notes echoed through the wall, loud enough that the rustle of her keys to walk into your apartment were drowned out.

"Hey, I brought the genome kit- oh, hi Doctor Altman." A fake smile on her lips as she spotted you sat on the couch, playing guitar with Teddy sat next to you.

"Hey, Joey! So, wait, is it a saliva in a tube one or-"

"Yeah, it's a spit in a tube one- are you seriously taking it to the bathroom to spit in a tube?" Jo asked, giving you an incredulous look as you nodded.

"It's weird to have you two watching me spit in a tube, okay!" You retorted, Jo rolling her eyes before noticing how your ID card had fallen from Indiana Bones.

"Why is there a skeleton model as a coat rack, by the way?" Teddy enquired, raising an eyebrow as Jo clipped your ID to Indiana Bones' ribs.

"We found Indiana Bones here and figured it was a good coat rack. We were interns... this little old lady gave us a horrified look when she saw us trying to shove the skeleton into the back of my car though." Jo explained, turning to face the bathroom as you walked out.

"Done. So we just post it and wait for the results?" You asked, grabbing the instructions that Jo was holding.

"Yeah, hey-" Jo pouted, reaching for the instructions you were holding out of reach, the two of you oblivious to Teddy's amused gaze, watching the pair of you.

///

Tags: @nnightskiess @emskisworld @multifandomlesbianic

[nellie-elizabeth]

Grey's Anatomy: Breathe (17x10)

Well, this was stressful.

Cons:

Okay, I loved seeing Lexie and Mark in theory, but I have to be brutally honest and say that this is the first time that Meredith's dreamscape beach scenes tipped over into too saccharine for me. I think it's because Lexie and Mark both seemed like guardian angels, only there for Meredith, and they didn't really make me remember the fully developed characters. It wasn't bad by any stretch of the imagination, but it wasn't my favorite of the cameos.

When Catherine asked Jo if she was thinking about switching specialties and Jo had this weird reaction, that felt like an awkward script moment to me. Too over the top and noticeable of a reaction to such an innocuous question.

Pros:

Hey, Owen had three separate moments in this episode that I liked. What even is this crazy upside-down world?! First, the texting with Cristina was hilarious and cute. I love the little ways they think of to bring the characters into the story even though the actors are unavailable. It made me think about Alex, though... does he know Meredith is on a vent? Does he fucking care? Ugh. Still bitter.

The second Owen moment I liked was when he told Tom that he wouldn't wish survivor's guilt on anyone. That was a nice moment between the two of them. Tom is not always the kindest but he's cruelest when he's aiming the insults at himself. I liked that Owen recognized that unhealthiness in him and decided to say something about it.

And then finally, Owen coming over to pick up Leo and Allison, and telling Zola that her mom came off the vent. That was such a lovely moment. It felt so earned, like such a big triumph, and it warmed my heart that he told Zola, instead of telling Amelia and Teddy first.

Speaking of... Meredith is off the vent! Let's have a dance party! That was super cute. I loved Richard hitting this low moment of grief and then with the innovation about sharing the vents, he skyrocketed into a place of such hope. This whole episode toed that line really well. Lots of tragedy, lots of near-deaths and catastrophic happenstances... but then a lot of hope mixed in!

Schmitt had to deal with a friend of the family coming in with bad COVID symptoms, and then the woman's daughter is also admitted, also very sick. It comes down to one vent, two patients who desperately need it. Very dramatic stakes, and my heart was breaking for the mother-daughter duo of interns who had to be there for this very fraught situation. Also, poor Schmitt, intubating the patient and then that moment of realization that there were no more ventilators available... so terrible.

But then you have Maggie, coming in with the save of the day, as she realizes they can split the airflow and use one vent for two patients! This is probably... not actually viable, or else it's something that already would have been tried in real life, right? Or maybe this is going on all over the place in hospitals and I just don't know about it. But in any case, in this fictional world, I loved this win for Maggie. It's not total victory - it's still really bad that these patience have to be ventilated. But it gives them a reprieve, exactly when it was so badly needed.

And then... Winston proposed! Maggie said yes!! I'm so happy for her. This is a relationship I really understand for her. It's what she deserves. I'm curious as to how Winston is going to fit in with the ensemble cast as a whole: will he become a series regular? I hope so, because I like Maggie and I like this loving relationship for her.

We're getting some more time with Hayes. We meet his sister-in-law, a woman with MS who doesn't much trust western medicine. Catherine performs a routine surgery on her, but there's a complication (because of course there is!). We see how badly shaken Hayes is, at the prospect of losing someone else, especially since this woman has become such an important part of his children's lives, in the wake of their mother's death. Luckily, it looks like she's going to be okay - another moment where hope wins!

I just really liked the vibe between Hayes and his sister-in-law. They had this deep familiarity and affection, even with clear differences of opinion about important things. And seeing Hayes break down a bit, and Jo be the one to bolster him, was a nice little dynamic moment between the two of them, so I liked that as well.

A couple other moments I liked: Jackson and Jo in bed, and Jo saying "your mother is scary" and Jackson saying "why would you bring up my mom when I'm lying here naked, what is wrong with you?" That was super funny.

Also, despite the cheese, I did like watching Lexie and Mark frolic in the waves, and the anecdote about Mark yelling in Callie and Arizona's ears to try and warn them about future hardship.

And finally, despite my continued antipathy about Teddy, I did like that moment where Owen gave her the credit for Meredith coming off the vent, showing that he's letting go of some of his anger. I might not ever be a fan of Owen or Teddy as characters, but I'm definitely on board with closing the chapter on their drama for a while. They're exhausting to deal with.

So that's that! As the episode ends, it looks like Meredith might be ready to wake up at long last. Is there anyone else she'll get to see on the beach before she does? One final glimpse of Derek? We'll have to wait and see!

8/10

[kaimelia]

could you write something about Amelia and Owen being friends again? after she tells Owen about the baby? thank you !

Happier

a/n: hi! sorry for the delay in posting, it’s been a weird week. i hope this is what you were looking for, it’s more of a long-term thing rather than a one moment fic.

------------------------------------------------------------

“Can you see if Amelia can take Leo?” Teddy moved to grab her phone, pulling up Amelia’s contact and sending a quick text.

“She’s not going to want to, Owen. He’s probably gonna get her sick from whatever Allison has.”

“Just ask, okay?” His girlfriend set down the phone before it buzzed. “Is that her?”

“She can take Leo, do you want her to stop by and pick him up?” Owen nodded, shifting the crying baby in his arms. Allison had come down with some bug and taking care of a sick baby was proving to be more work than either of them anticipated. Sure, Leo had gotten fevers when he was young, but even at the youngest Owen had known him, Leo was only six months old. “Okay, she says she’ll be here soon, she just has to put the car seat into Link’s car.”

“Link?”

“Her boyfriend, the one we work with?”

“I know who Link is, but is he gonna be with her and Leo?”

“I mean, probably. Is that an issue? Is Link a psychopath and I’m just not aware of this?” Teddy waited for him to respond, instead just watching as he rocked back and forth with the baby. “Owen?”

“Hm?”

“You’re being weird about Amelia and Link.” He shrugged his shoulders and sat down in the nursery chair. “For the record, I think he’s good for her. She looks really happy, and I know that you two have a lot of history, but you should try to be happy for Amelia.”

“They’re having a baby, her and Link.” The blonde woman raised her eyebrows at him and crossed her arms over her chest.

“Okay, so she’s moving on. Just try to be happy for her, Owen.”

------------------------------------------------------------

“He slept for most of the night. And we had Cheerios for breakfast, so he should be pretty easy for a while.”  Amelia handed over the small bag that he and Teddy had packed for Leo as Link walked up behind her.

“And here’s the little guy,” Link said excitedly, bouncing the boy on his hip. Owen took his son before smiling and rustling his hair.

“Thank you, again.” Amelia smiled.

“Of course. You guys can do it for us one day.” At her words, his eyes drifted down to look at her stomach, where her hand rested on her bump, which was more obvious than before. Silence settled between for a moment before Link wrapped his arm around Amelia’s waist.

“Well, we should probably get going, we have plans for lunch.” The couple said goodbye to Owen and headed back to their car. “That was painfully awkward,” Link commented, backing the car out of the driveway.

“He’s been weird ever since I told him about the baby. I wish that we could all just move on and be friends. I mean, he had a baby with Teddy and I was fine with that, why can’t he just be the same?” Link grabbed her hand over the console of the car.

“You weren’t so fine with it at first. Give him some time, he’ll come around.”

------------------------------------------------------------

Meredith’s hearing took longer than expected. Owen could swear he’d been sitting in the lobby waiting for at least the past 7 hours. Sure, he knew that legal processes took a long time and blah blah, but they’d already finished the hearings and now they were just waiting. Amelia, Link, and Teddy had returned a few minutes ago, sharing the news that Castello had died (something he thought Amelia seemed a little too excited about) and everyone had returned back to what they were doing before that. He sighed, checking his watch, hoping to make time speed up by any rate. Owen stood up and got himself another coffee, turning back around to the couch while taking a sip and sitting back down and engulfing his attention into his phone.

“Hey,” Amelia muttered, sitting on the couch across from him. “I feel completely dead.” Owen looked up and offered her a smile.

“I know. Are you going to stay until they have news?” Amelia nodded, adjusting the pillow behind her back.

“Yeah, Meredith drove me here, anyway. I was thinking about leaving with Link, but Meredith would pester me about it for the next few months, so we’re gonna stay. How about you?”

“Staying.” The two engaged in some small talk for the next few minutes before Link walked over, sitting down next to Amelia on the couch. Owen watched as the brunette smiled up at her boyfriend, and leaned her body against his.

“You look exhausted,” the orthopedic surgeon commented, wrapping an arm around her shoulder. “Do you wanna head out? I’m sure Meredith won’t hate you.”

“No, she’ll just leave me behind whenever we carpool to work. Although, who knows if that’ll be happening any more.” Owen raised his eyebrows.

“Really?”

“I’m just being honest here.” He couldn’t help but feel awkward as Link whispered something into her ear, emitting a laugh from her as she glanced up at her boyfriend, a large grin spread across her face.

------------------------------------------------------------

Link looked terrified. Frankly, Owen had just told him that parenthood was the most terrifying thing ever and he was just going to be more and more scared, which was not the response he was hoping for. Owen seemed to notice and let out a sigh. “It seems bad, but you’re going to be fine. I promise that everyone makes it sound more terrifying than it is.”

“Didn’t you just say-”

“Of course you’re going to be terrified, but once he’s born you’ll also be insanely happy. And everything will be perfect for a while.”

“I’m just worried about Amelia. She’s scared of what’ll happen and I know she’s still dealing with a lot of grief. From Christopher.” Link stopped as he handed the nurse the instrument he was using. “And with the extra stress from whatever’s happening with Richard, she’s pushing herself, and she doesn’t want any input from me, of course.” He looked up to see Owen standing still. “Sorry, I probably shouldn’t have said anything-”

“No, it’s okay. We’re all family now, right?” Link nodded.

“Right.”

------------------------------------------------------------

He had settled outside of their hospital room, hoping to take his mind off of the cancellation of his wedding, and probably the end of his relationship with Teddy. Amelia and Link were laying on the hospital bed with his arm wrapped around her while both of them were completely enamored by their son who was laying in her arms. Owen smiled softly, remembering when Allison had just been born and he was just as happy. It had only been a few months since that time, but he would do anything to get that happiness back. He didn’t want to interrupt their little bubble of happiness, even as much as he wanted to go in and hold the baby and share some of their happiness. He knew if he went in the room, they’d ask why he was at the hospital instead of getting married and he would have to explain everything. There’d be a time for that in the future.

He didn’t know how much time had passed, but eventually, Link stood up from the bed to rock the baby around. Amelia looked over and saw Owen standing outside of the window and waved to him. He waved back politely, noticing the smile on her face. She had rarely smiled like that while they were together and it was a smile he had just gotten to see more recently. She looked happy. Happier than he had ever seen her, and he was truly happy for her and Link. He knew that Link was good for her, better than he could be.

And that was it. It was suddenly that simple; she was happy and he was happy for her.

[amelialincoln]

Notion

“Hey.” Link was breathless as he brought the final bits of outdoor furniture into the kitchen. It was supposed to rain tomorrow and Seattle had become covered in a thick layer of fog that seemed to cling to him as he closed the door to the backyard.

“Everyone headed out?” Amelia asked, scraping the last of the kid’s leftovers into the compost. Link nodded, placing a lingering, cold kiss on her forehead that made her shiver.

“Seemed kinda awkward between Jackson and Winston.”

“Well, it’s not Maggie’s fault that Jackson’s dated every person in a fifty mile radius,” she responded bitterly.

“This is true,” Link nodded.

“What’s going to make things worse is that she’s going to have to explain that all of us are mourning her other ex’s death,” she added grimly.

“No,” Link’s voice was soft. “I thought he pulled through.” 

“Richard just called me to see if I wanted to join a meeting on zoom tonight, everything fell apart and Teddy and Owen couldn’t save him.” Tears were starting to fill her eyes. Deluca hadn’t spent much time on her service recently but he and Sam were pivotal when she was working on Kimmie’s tumor. When it came to her own tumor, she was surprised how much Deluca had shown his support.

“So, he’s just gone?” Unlike Amelia, Link hadn’t experienced a whole lot of death.

“Yeah.” He pulled her into his chest and rocked gently. It almost hurt how nice it was to see the few people that had come over today. Despite the house they were living in being chaos, the couple had never felt more isolated and alone. “I had to tell Zola that Mer might possibly not wake up.” Amelia whimpered. “She was so strong. She doesn’t want to worry Bailey and Ellis so she told Maggie and I not to tell them. If anything happens to Mer, Derek made Kathleen their godmother, I can’t watch these kids get shipped off to New York, they’ve had it hard enough.” 

“I know, babe,” Link sighed, pulling her in closer.

“I have to go feed Scout, my boobs are gonna explode,” Amelia finally shed herself of Link’s arms after a couple of blissful moments. “Can you read to Zola and Bailey? I can handle Ellis because she’ll get like five stories out of you if I let you go in there.” Link chuckled.

“You’re probably right.”

 [][][]

“Auntie Amelia.” Amelia was relieved to be greeted with a sleepy voice as she stepped into the pink monstrosity that was Ellis’ room.

“Hi Elle belle.” She smiled in response to the little girl’s arms reaching towards her. “Come on sweetheart, let's pick some pjs.”

“Can you make it a surprise?” Ellis asked in a way that made Amelia’s ovaries explode and she found herself wondering what Link would think about trying for a girl. Hormones, Amelia, focus. “What about these?” She suggested, holding up a pair of pastel blue Moana pajamas. Ellie nodded happily, squealing as Amelia tugged them over her pudgy arms.

“Can we read the cookie mouse story?”

“Of course,” Amelia grinned. “It’s not like we haven’t read it every day this week.” She lowered herself gently down onto Ellis’ bed. Recovery hadn’t been the easiest when chasing three children around the house and caring for a newborn. Link had pulled out Amelia’s stitches the night before, using his phone’s flashlight, since neither of them wanted to go to the hospital and then go through the trouble of getting tested. She had tried to hide the pain for Link’s sake, tired of him expecting her to be constantly resting, but she hadn’t expected the pain. Link was an incredible ortho surgeon but when it came to the little details, he was sometimes a bit careless.

Amelia closed the door to Ellis’ bedroom as quietly as possible, trying not to chuckle at the little figure sprawled out across her twin bed. For such a small girl Ellis was notoriously known as the most impossible person to sleep with, taking up spaces three times her size. She walked past Zola and Bailey’s room, hearing Link’s animated voice through fits of giggles. He definitely outdid her in the storytelling department, and really in every department, which she tried to not think too much about. Scout was babbling as Amelia entered the familiar room.

“You hungry, big guy?” To Amelia’s relief, Scout had progressed past his grumpy and problematic eating phase. She hugged him into her chest, breathing in his sweet and comforting soft lavender smell from the bubble bath they’d used this afternoon. “My beautiful boy.” She was still in disbelief, even staring down at him in her arms, that he truly existed. As he’d gotten bigger, he’d started to become a perfect combination of his parents. With Link’s strong features, like his nose, and what Amelia could tell would be his jaw, along with her dimple and piercing blue eyes.

“Hey mommy,” Link’s amused voice came from the doorway. “You feeling better?” Amelia wasn’t sure whether he was referring to the soreness in her lower half or the news about Deluca.

“He makes everything better,” she sighed, fumbling with one of the buttons on Scout’s onesie.

“You going to go to that meeting?” Link asked, she could tell he knew something was bothering her. “I already missed it.” She shrugged, glancing at their bedside alarm clock. “I’ll probably just feed him and then pass out.”

“Do you want me to grab the baby wrap, you were lifting lots today already with the furniture.”

“Sure,” she nodded, not feeling like having a conversation about how perfectly fine her arms were. Link nodded, placing a soft hand on her back before rummaging through their closet for the wrap. She was happy to find that Scout latched on easily and without protest, feeling a little guilty about the lack of attention that he’d received today. She knew that people were suffering way more during this time and she couldn’t help but feel guilty for wishing that she, Scout and Link could be spending quality time in their apartment for their maternity leave like planned.

“Lift your arm a bit.” Link ran a soft hand along the side of her forearm as he tied the piece of fabric around her shoulder and managed to wiggle Scout into it, without removing him from her chest.

“Thank you,” she smiled tiredly.

“No problem,” he yawned, practically collapsing into bed beside her. “Fuck, Amelia I’m exhasuted.”

“Me too.” She ran a gentle hand through his hair, tugging out some of the frequent knots that had begun to form since his hair had begun to grow out.

“Is your incision site healing okay,” he groaned into the pillow, melting a bit as she massaged the root of his neck.

“I haven’t checked,” she admitted with a yawn.

“Want me to grab some polysporin?”

“It’s okay, babe, it feels fine.” She sighed slightly, playing with the idea of bringing up a topic that has been bugging her but not wanting to cause an argument that neither of them were up for. “You started drinking pretty early today.”

“Amelia,” Link groaned tiredly. “It’s not a big deal.”

“It was just unnecessary, no one wanted...I’m just worried.” She shifted Scout to the other side uncomfortably.

“It’s not my fault you see addiction everywhere. I had like two beers.” Silence hung thickly in the air and after a couple of minutes Link turned to face her. “I’m sorry. I know it makes you uncomfortable.” 

“You don’t really seem to care,” she answered honestly.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He replied defensively, tiredness had seemed to leave his body momentarily. “I don’t--”

“The fridge is stocked, Link. It’s like a reminder every time I go to make food. There’s a cooler in the garage for a reason.”

“How am I supposed to know,” he sputtered. “Meredith downs tequila in front of you like this is a frat house. You hang out with our friends when they drink all the time.” 

“It’s different when you're surrounded by people. When I’m alone and just staring at a fridge filled with booze it’s hard to not want to take one.”

“Amelia, you haven’t relapsed in years, why would you even--”

“Because I’m an addict, Link!” The increase in volume of her voice caused Scout to shriek in protest. “Don’t you understand that? It doesn’t get easier. It’s a fight every fucking day. And when my boyfriend starts drinking every day at three o’clock in the afternoon, it makes that fight ten times harder.”

“Well, I’m sorry you feel that way,” he grumbled. 

“Are you serious right now?”

“About what,” he shot back.

“Well, I’m sorry you feel that way. I thought you’d be considerate enough to validate my feelings instead of acting like I’m being dramatic but instead you’re being a child.”

“Mia,” Link groaned, slamming his head back into the pillow, looking as childish as ever. “You’re--”

“What? Overreacting? The fact that you don’t see this as an issue is concerning.” Scout’s shrieking turned into a full on meltdown as their “perfect” son burst into tears. “Oh, baby, no. It’s okay.” Amelia sighed, finding tears of frustration begin to build at the sides of her own eyes and let out a tiny whimper as she held back any sobs that attempted to be heard. Of course Link noticed, as always, and rolled over to witness the upset state that both his girlfriend and baby were in.

“I am sorry,”

“Show me then,” Amelia hissed through a clenched jaw, wiping away some stubborn fallen tears. “Cause right now I don’t believe you.”

“I’ll put the packs in the cooler tomorrow,” he promised, with a hint of resentment. Amelia shrugged, finally giving up on feeding Scout and bringing him tightly into her chest.

“Hey, it’s okay, mommy and daddy fight sometimes, but everything’s going to be okay. Don’t cry Scout. We love you so much,” she murmured into the crown of his head, causing Link to melt a little inside.

“Are we going to be okay?” Link asked, receiving a teary glance from his girlfriend. 

“Not if you can’t get this sorted because I cannot be his mother and also be passed out in a ditch somewhere on opioids.” Link nodded, moving to tug her shirt back into place and took Scout into his own hands, marvelling slightly at the little miracle they had created. “I don’t want to screw him up.” 

“You won’t,” he promised her, pressing a kiss to her forehead before grazing her slightly chapped lips. “You’ve been a mother for a month and have already proved that. That’s the last thing we need to worry about right now.” He patted his chest. “Now come to sleep because if we stay up any longer I feel like I might end up on the couch,” he chuckled. 

“Don’t give me any ideas,” she replied with a yawn. 

“I love you,” he sighed.

“I love you too.” 

what did u guys think of 17x07? i did find the beers at like 12 a bit weird and with the upcoming episode’s synopsis “Jo, Jackson and Link play a drinking game” I wonder if Amelia and him will have a conversation about her addiction bc I feel like they haven't really talked about it. lmk what u think!

[iamtrebleclefstories]

The Little Bit of Hope I Cling To - Part 3

Izzie goes to Grey Sloan looking for Bailey, Meredith, or Alex. She meets Dr. Karev instead

*takes place early s15*

Part 3:

——————

The next few months went by quickly. Izzie’s surgeries had gone well and she was undergoing IL-2 treatments again in hopes of killing the cancer. While she was working hard to fight her cancer, she hired a caregiver to make sure her mom was okay. About a month after her last surgery, Izzie was discharged from the hospital. With Maggie living with Jackson and Amelia living with Owen, Izzie, Geo, and Piper all moved into Meredith’s house. For about two weeks they’d been living there and Izzie was bored out of her mind.

“I need to get out of this house,” Izzie banged her head against the kitchen island. “I need to go to work. I can’t sit here all day doing nothing. I’m a freaking neurosurgeon.”

“Trust me, I get it,” Meredith chuckled. “Why don’t you just ask Alex for a job? I’m sure he’d be willing to move some things around for you to work at least a few hours throughout the week.”

“You’re kidding right?” Izzie picked her head up from the counter and raised her eyebrows. “He’s not going to give me privileges. Have you seen the way he’s been hovering these past three months? He didn’t want to discharge me. The only reason I’m here right now is because Jo said it was ridiculous to keep me in the hospital and that she was my surgeon, so she was the one who got to clear me to go home.”

“Maybe you should talk to Jo then? Get her to soften him up. Tell her to tell him that she’s prescribing work because mental health is just as important as physical health when it comes to fighting cancer,” Meredith suggested as she readied the kids lunches for school. “Does Geo like carrots?”

“Not really, but put them in his lunch box. He needs the vegetables,” Izzie played with the hem of her sweater. “You know, I think I will talk to Jo. I need this. I need to work. I don’t care where. I’ll even work in the clinic if I have to. I’ll see if she can talk to him for me. She’s the only one he has a hard time saying no to... When the hell did he get so whipped?”

“Oh, just somewhere around six years ago,” Meredith laughed. “He’s been whipped since before they even got together.”

Izzie popped a couple blueberries into her mouth, “Tell me how they met. Every time I ask either of them, they try to change the subject. I don’t know if it’s because I’m the ex-wife or because they don’t like talking about it and being all mushy, but I really want to hear about it.”

“Well, Jo was an intern and Alex was doing his first year of fellowship. They met because Jo was on his service one day. He was a jerk the majority of the day. So, Jo told him that he didn’t have to worry about being nice to her because she had no plans on sleeping with him, since he’d already slept with all of her friends. Things obviously worked out very differently,” Meredith smirked.

“Of course he slept all her friends first,” Izzie chuckled softly. “But how did they get together? I’m still not understanding. Did they end up falling into bed together or something? Alex and I had sex in a supply closet while you had your hand in that guy’s body holding a bomb.”

“Wait, that’s happened?” Meredith raised her eyebrows and laughed when Izzie nodded embarrassed. “I can’t believe you guys... But anyway, no that’s not what happened. A few months later, they became best friends after going to Bailey’s wedding. They would hang out all the time and drink beer like old buddies. I kept asking Alex why he didn’t just ask her out already and he insisted that there was nothing going on between the two of them. Fast forward six months and a whole lot of complicated things, and Alex finally told her that he was in love with her. Then they kissed.”

“Hold on, he said I love you before sleeping with her first?” Izzie asked in surprise.

“Yup,” Meredith grinned as she nodded. “You know, they were a thing for entire week before having sex? He kept chickening out because he said he wanted it to be special. Jo on the other hand was desperate to jump his bones, haha.”

“He really did change,” Izzie shook her head in disbelief. “Jo is good for him. It’s like they were made for each other.”

“I’m glad you think so,” Meredith said as she finally sat down to drink her coffee. “I was a little worried at first when you came back. Not because I doubt Alex or anything like that. I know Alex would never leave Jo. He’s willing to die, kill, and go to jail for, in love with her. But I was worried that you would try to cause problems. And I was worried for Jo. She’d been through a lot in her life. Maybe even more than me, but she’s always smiled and been happy. I was worried that being your surgeon would cause her to lose some of that. She never did though, and she still hasn’t.”

“Honestly, I kind of fell in love with her. So I completely understand,” Izzie chuckled. She really meant it too. Jo had been wonderful in the past few months. She didn’t know how to even begin thanking the woman for all that she’d done for her.

“I’m going to the hospital. Are you coming with me?” Meredith asked.

“Yeah,” Izzie nodded. “I’m going to go upstairs and and get the kids.”

***

“Jo, come on babe. We’ve got to go or we’re gonna be late,” Alex yelled from the opposite side of the loft.

Jo sat in the bathroom staring in disbelief at the pregnancy test she held in her hands. After months of trying and receiving negative test results, Jo finally saw the answer she’d been hoping for. She hadn’t planned on taking a test this morning. She usually did one every few weeks. Today she’d seen the box under the bathroom cabinet and decided to take it.

Truthfully, as much as she longed for it, she hadn’t expected those results. She hadn’t expected the little flutter in her chest and the prickling of tears in her eyes when she saw the two little lines she’d prayed for. It was positive. She was pregnant.

“Jo, we really need to leave. Let’s go,” Alex knocked on the bathroom door, startling her out of the moment.

Taking a calming breath, she called out, “Coming! Just need to wash my hands. Wait for me in the car.”

Alex grumbled something she couldn’t quite make out. Jo waited until she heard the loft door close before walking out, the positive pregnancy test clutched tightly in her hand. She crossed over to the other side of the loft and placed the test in her nightstand, hiding it underneath a couple articles she’d been reading. Grabbing her purse, she steadied herself and schooled her expression so as not to alert Alex of her newfound knowledge.

She jumped into the passenger seat and pretended like it was any other day. As much as Jo wanted to just blurt it out, she wanted to take a blood test in the hospital first before telling Alex. She wanted to be sure, and she wanted it to be special.

They arrived just as Meredith and Izzie were walking towards the hospital entrance. Alex and Jo hopped out of the car and greeted the two women warmly.

“What are you doing here?” Alex turned to Izzie. “You should be home resting.”

“I came to talk to you about letting me work,” Izzie gave Jo a pleading look. “Jo said that my mental health is very important to my reconvert and she suggested that I do things I love and get back to as normal of a routine as possible.”

Understanding what Izzie was trying to tell her, Jo nodded, “Yes. That’s right. She should be getting back to her normal routine, which includes work. Not as many hours as she was working before, but she definitely needs to do what she loves. She needs to work. Doctors orders.”

The three women looked over at Alex expectantly. His eyes flitted back and forth between them and he eyed Jo skeptically, “I feel like you guys are ganging up on me.”

“Come on, Alex. Let her work. She’s okay and she needs this,” Jo looked at Alex with wide eyes that she knew he wouldn’t be able to resist.

“Fine, you can work in the clinic,” Alex sighed as she addressed Izzie. “But no heavy lifting or exerting yourself. And I’ll grant you privileges to work on simple neuro cases that come into the ER, like clipping aneurysms.”

“Ah! Thank you!” Izzie jumped in excitement and gave Alex a brief hug. “Best chief ever!” She turned to Jo and smiled, “And you are amazing! I get to put on some scrubs for the first time in months.”

Alex rolled his eyes, “I’m going inside. See you guys later.”

The ladies walked over to the coffee cart and got in line to place their orders. Once up at the front, Jo asked for her coffee, “Hi. Can I get a a regular coffee, two creams, two sugars? Actually make it decaf.”

“Decaf?” Meredith looked at Jo quizzically. “Why are you getting decaf? You live off of expresso shots.”

“That’s true, every time I saw you with a cup in your hand, it was always something with expresso in it,” Izzie tilted her head in confusion. “You thrive off of caffeine.”

“I just... didn’t want it today,” Jo shrugged, hoping that would be a good enough explanation to distract from the fact that she’d only ordered decaf because she may be pregnant.

“Since when do you not want caffeine?” Meredith questioned.

Izzie gasped, “Oh my God! Are you pregnant?”

Jo froze in surprise. She’d always figured that if she were to get pregnant, Meredith would be one of the first to know. Ever since she and Meredith got closer, the order of people finding out would be Meredith, Alex, Link, Ben, and Bailey. She never once expected that her husband’s ex-wife would be on that list, let alone figure it out before anyone else. So, that’s why she just stood there in shock, I unanswering.

“Oh God, you are pregnant!” Meredith exclaimed.

“Shhhh! Keep it down. I don’t need everyone to know that the chief’s wife is pregnant before I even tell him,” Jo looked around frantically, hoping that no one else heard what happened.

“Wait, he doesn’t know?” Izzie asked.

“No. I found out this morning as he was rushing me to get out of the house,” Jo scanned the area and spoke in a hushed voice. “The car on our way to work didn’t seem like the appropriate time to share this life changing news. I want it to be special. Plus, I really want to take a blood test first to be sure.”

“Well then what are we waiting for? Let’s go do the test right now,” Meredith urged.

“We can go to the clinic and do it in one of the private exam rooms. It doesn’t open for another hour, but I can take the test for you and no one will ever know,” Izzie grabbed Jo by the hand and started walking away from the coffee cart, motioning for Meredith to follow. “Come on, let’s go!”

***

“You know what I just realized?” Izzie wondered out loud.

“What?” Meredith and Jo said at the same time.

“Oddly enough, this isn’t the first time I’ve run a pregnancy test for someone Alex may have knocked up,” Izzie chuckled as she thought back to events of over a decade ago.

“Alex knocked someone else up? Alex has a kid?” Jo’s eyes widened and her voice raised in pitch.

“What? No! No, no, no... when we were second year residents his ex-girlfriend Rebecca thought she was pregnant and I ran a pregnancy on her that came out negative. She was having a hysterical pregnancy,” Izzie explained as she removed the needle from Jo’s arm and disposed of it.

“Ooh, I forgot about that,” Meredith gasped. “That girl was insane. Actually crazy.”

“Wait, is this the same girlfriend that peed on your couch?” Jo turned to Meredith.

“Yup,” Meredith nodded. “Ava—or Rebecca was her real name. She was a patient that Alex saved and she fell in love with him... and then she went crazy.”

“I’m not crazy,” Jo looked back and forth between both women. “I know I have had my moments, but it was really was positive.”

“Jo, we know you’re not crazy,” Izzie laughed. “Trust me, we know crazy—I was crazy for a minute there. I had a brain tumor that caused me to hallucinate my dead fiancé.”

“I’m going to take these to the lab and put a rush on them. Go about your day like normal and we’ll meet for lunch to give you the results,” Meredith squeezed Jo’s shoulder as she walked out.

Jo watched as Izzie cleaned up the supplies they’d used for the blood draw, “I’m sorry. This must be really weird for you. You just ran a pregnancy test for your ex-husband’s new wife. It’s not exactly something I’d be thrilled to do. But then again, my ex-husband was a horrible human being, so let’s be glad he never procreated.”

“You were married before?” Izzie paused and looked up at Jo.

“Uh—yeah... it’s a very long story, but I was in an abusive marriage with a man who almost killed me on multiple occasions. I ran away, changed my name, and never divorced him. But then a little over a year ago, he died after being hit by a drunk driver, and I was free.”

“I can’t even begin to imagine what that must’ve been like for you,” Izzie frowned sadly. She felt like there was still so much she had left to learn about the woman Alex married. The resilience after so much hardship and the ability to smile after enduring so much pain were encouraging. “If you are pregnant, this baby is going to be very strong.”

“Thanks,” Jo smiled as she stood up. She looked over at Izzie and opened the door. “Come on, let’s go get your scrubs.”

***

Hours later, the three women met outside the ER to read the results. Jo was fidgeting nervously. Everything within her was on edge. She knew she was pregnant. She had to be pregnant. The stick she peed on this morning had two lines and she was almost positive her labs would reflect the presence of child in her uterus. Sure, she didn’t really have any symptoms yet, but the entire morning she thought back and realized that her last period was over six weeks ago. She’d been so busy with Izzie’s case and her fellowship, that she’d failed to notice.

Meredith held the paper in her hands, “Do you want to read it or do you want me to do it?”

“You do it,” Jo bit her bit anxiously. She watched as Meredith slowly unfolded the paper, Izzie leaning over her shoulder to see the results. “I think I’ll chicken out if I do it. Which sounds stupid because we want this. We’ve been trying for months, now. But for some reason, I just feel like I want to puke.”

“Well, that might just be the morning sickness talking because you’re definitely pregnant,” Izzie shared, a wide grin dawning her face. “Congratulations!”

“Yup,” Meredith nodded, an equally large smile gracing her features. “Your hCG levels indicate that you are pregnant. Probably six to seven weeks along.”

Jo took a deep breath, “Oh my God... I’m pregnant.”

“You’re pregnant,” Meredith chuckled and gave Jo a hug. “You two are going to be the very best parents to this baby.”

“I need to tell Alex,” Jo finally said, some of the shock beginning to wear off. She got up from the bench she’d been sitting on to go to his office when Izzie stopped her.

“Woah, hold on a minute. You can’t just go barging in and say ‘we’re having a baby.’ You gotta do something cute,” Izzie insisted. “And you’ve got to plant a camera to record his reaction when you tell him because we definitely want to see that.”

“You’re right,” Jo nodded. “That’s why I didn’t tell him this morning. I want it to be special.”

“It’s going to be special no matter what you do,” Meredith placed a hand on Jo’s shoulder. “It’s special because the baby is special, and your love is special. However you decide to tell him will be special.”

Jo took in Meredith’s advice and decided that it was true. But it didn’t make her want to abandon the thought of a sweet gesture any less. Deciding what she wanted to do, Jo made arrangements to set her plan in motion.

By the time she and Alex got off work, there were only a couple things she had left to do before telling him about the baby. Meredith had stopped by the loft early to plant the items she’d need for her pregnancy reveal. As they pulled into their parking space outside the loft, Jo felt her heart begin to beat rapidly.

She turned in her seat to look at Alex, “So, I have a surprise for you inside the house. It was delivered early so you’ve got to keep your eyes closed until I tell you. Promise you won’t open them until I say so.”

Alex sighed. He was tired and really just want to shower and go to sleep, but his wife had taken the time out of her day to surprise him. The least he could do was be grateful, “Okay. I promise.”

Jo led him up into the loft with her hands covering his eyes, much like the first time she’d surprised him with their couch. She stopped him right in front of that very piece of furniture and removed her hands, “Ta dah!”

“It’s our couch... the couch you already surprised me with six years ago,” Alex made a face.

Jo slapped his arm, “Not the couch you dummy. Look at what’s on it.”

“It’s a box of pizza. Not that I don’t love pizza, but why?”

Jo released an exasperated sigh, “You have to open the box first, you dummy.”

Jo watched as Alex leant down and slowly opened the box up, revealing the message inside. Congrats on being promoted to Dad. She watched his face contort with a variety of emotions before meeting hers with a look of wonder.

“You’re pregnant?”

“I’m pregnant,” Jo nodded. “Probably about six weeks or so.”

“We’re having a baby,” Alex stood up from his position of being hunched forwards to wrap Jo in his arms. “Oh my God. We’re having a baby!”

“We’re having a baby!” Jo laughed and released the breath she’d been holding. “We’re going to be parents!”

“Hell yeah, we are.”