#I would say what happened to the mom but I am suddenly a gatekeeper and as such am gatekeeping that info until further notice

[noodlepai]

Okay soo I can't exactly help myself bcuz I wanna info dump so badly abt my AU again because I just am so fixated on it and I love coming up with ideas for it sjdjJSJ please excuse me, long post with long tags because I am opening the floodgates rn

I just can't stop thinking abt it and putting more story and details into it y'know y'know? It's my guilty pleasure

(I kinda changed some things in it *cough* and am still changing stuff)

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Kyle wasn't really scared but was moreso interested in eteled when first meeting him, and of course being the little kid he is, he kinda messed with the guy a whole lot, when eteled doesn't like most kids all too much, (except for his bro and cousins, and later on Sam) and would ask Kyle to leave him alone, eventually after enough of being swung around in the air, being poked and all around harassed for an unspecified amount of time, eteled blew up at the guy to just leave him alone for good, he does have the axe in this scenario but it's for defense against being picked up again with that stupid ass Wii remote (although he isn't sure if it would work) and also to kinda get the point across to Kyle, so he's basically swinging his arms around a lot as he's yelling, and to sum it up quickly, pretty much what happens is that Kyle's Mii comes up behind eteled on accident, following it's programmed walk cycle and that just scares the shit out of him, causing him to swing his axe to fight back, and you can kinda guess how that goes

^ To add, the thing with eteled being deleted, and then banning Kyle temporarily from the Mii Channel did happen before all this, and Nathan was present during eteled's last straw being ripped from him, but he had less involvement in what pissed the guy off, and basically was invited over by Kyle, nonetheless he still witnessed the accident

eteled feels horrible for his actions, even though what had happened was entirely an accident, he's angry with himself, so he doesn't blame the kid one bit when Kyle decides that he has had enough mental damage and just throws the Wii in the closet, and yes Austin definitely knows about what happened, and he knows Kyle, so you can deduce from that how pissed Austin is, not only because of the fact that a poor kid has probably been traumatized, but it was his damn nephew

Kyle, some years later, does go back to check on eteled, because he's curious even though he doesn't wanna be, and is terrified, but he doesn't put anything on his computer because he is not about to have some scary ass Mii haunt his computer when he can just keep him in the Wii and throw it back in the closet or even in the trash if needed, so he reluctantly sets the Wii back up, not even sure if it works or survived the throw from all those years ago, almost hoping it didn't, but it does work and it turns on, and after some thinking and searching for the Mii, Kyle finds eteled, and they talk, they explain some things like their sides of the story without coming off as uncaring, and etc, and eteled allows Kyle to delete him to show him what happens to him and other Miis and you get the idea (eteled has pretty good control over the camera and other system stuff so it's not hard for him to just take it in there with him)

^Kyle notices that eteled looks a tad different than what he remembers, he certainly doesn't remember the guy looking kinda roughened up and having some marks on his face, which unbeknownst to Kyle, is a hint that there's another sentient being in this Wii but he doesn't catch onto it at this time

It's after the original events that happened with eteled and Kyle's Mii, that eteled starts learning more and more things about his digital body and the things he can effect inside the Wii, like he never realized how disturbing some of his facial expressions could be, especially when upset, so he figured that's why people have reacted the way they did when seeing him make certain faces, and he eventually learns to use this to his advantage, which he tries on Austin sometimes to get him to go away, and later coming into play when he feels the Wii turn back on after some time, and sees some random girl instead of the usual face he expected to see again

Sam, finally getting her hands on the console she wanted, is excited to get on the Wii, she discovers eteled, and is understandably confused at first, eteled wants nothing to do with her and any other kids, period, but he might as well try to scare her away if he has to, so it kinda turns into a scenario where he plays completely normal at first like just some random left over Mii, but then starts to mimick her movements and looks where she moves, to try to freak her out but she just thinks it's cool, Sam is into horror and all sorts of ghost type material, and the possibility of AI life, so it's more fascinating than anything, and when eteled finally drops the smile in a mix of frustration and being unamused, he just plainly goes "Boo" as a last resort, and Sam watches with her eyes lighting up like "Whoa, oh damn you guys talk?", with eteled staring and thinking to himself 'wth is wrong with this kid', he continues to try and push her away, even trying to freak her out with glitches or spooky faces but none of it works, Sam like "Omg that's so cool that you can do all that, you're a funny little guy" and wants to learn more about him and claim him as her new friend officially

^And as time goes on he softens up to her because she's very nice and caring, and he begins viewing her as someone he needs to protect as well, almost like a dad, while simultaneously seeing her as a friend, and even a mother figure in some ways

The situation with Will was a lot more tame cause nobody got hurt, except for eteled being deleted again *cough*, that and if you wanna also count the mental spook Will got when trying to fuck with Sam's Wii, no there was no axe, eteled pretty much crawled back out of The Hallway in pain, and scared the crap out of Will with his spoopy Mii faces, and that was enough for the kid to be like "Oh hell no" and then leave back out the window he came through (mf came through the window I still can't take that seriously in the canon story jsdjJSJ)

^Will got hit with the emo white man jumpscare

Oh, and the main reason Henry died was because of Austin, aka the guy was super pissed off and made sure that he would get his revenge by taking the guy down with him, hopefully causing him to be stuck in the same situation Austin is in by being a spirit confined to a digital body, that way he can continue to make him pay, even if he couldn't guarantee it, still worth getting back at Henry

^Haven't figured out yet how he would do this and if I should change how Henry exactly died but yeah that's pretty much what happened, also yes Todd was at the very least present during the aftermath of Austin's murder, but being the boss and with the amount of pressure Henry was under, it was kept a secret, especially for the console sales blah blah blah, and honestly Todd had a little more respect for Austin and his death, whereas he had much less for Mike when he tried telling the boss about what happened, along with the fact that Mike had to see that whole mess, and even less respect for Henry since he just showed his entire death to the whole workspace, which understandably made nothing much better and made Mike feel horrible, yeah Jonathan's not too happy either and you can guess why

I honestly don't know how Kyle manages to get Sam's contact info in canon, maybe I forgor but I just ?? But we'll go with it, I was thinking for this AU that maybe Jonathan had some sort of yard sale or something, trying to get rid of a bunch of old stuff him and Kyle don't use or don't need, or items that have memories attached to them that he no longer wants to hang around, and he gets Kyle's Wii cause he assumes he no longer wants the old thing, considering he now has another Wii and a Wii U amongst other consoles, and Kyle finds out later on, after it's already been sold to a mother and her daughter who saw the Wii and begged her mother to get it, needless to say, Kyle isn't happy, idk but I guess he could somehow get names and info from that but yeah, anyway, he contacts Sam, he tells the story, from his view, which is portraying eteled as some reckless or anger filled monster, and Sam doesn't believe it or see it, Kyle says he wants the Wii but doesn't say why, cause he knows she'll decline, but she declines anyway because she finds Kyle to be untrustworthy and tells him that "Well, not my problem that you decided to give your console away, it's mine now, I used part of my money to pay for it, and I honestly don't feel that I can trust your story right now" before eventually blocking him

^And then we know how that goes because she later wants them to talk and all that jazz

Sam had made her own Mii in the Wii so she could not only play as herself, but so it could possibly be comforting for her friend, especially when she had to leave like going somewhere or needing to go to school

^eteled kinda finds the other Miis to be uncanny at times but wouldn't admit it, and he lowkey feels panic go through him when he sees Kyle's old Mii still sometimes popping up and around whenever eteled goes and plays some games in Wii Sports, as if it's messing with him

And ah yes the moment of truth when Kyle is invited over to talk with eteled, and it goes how you'd expect it to, eteled tries to explain himself again, Kyle stands his ground, a fight ensues, eteled starts getting pissed and then Austin shows up, so the whole situation is almost exactly the same, Austin wants to get his ultimate revenge, not caring if the Wii will die because of it, and bam, it goes as planned, except for the fact that Sam manages to save the Wii from permanent damage, (idk if I want it to still be the ice method or maybe another way but she gets the job done) and you can understand the shock (no pun intended) when eteled and Austin are kinda in there just waiting to fade away and nothing happens at all, like "Uhhhh.. we're still here?"

^Also it's because of this event that not only does eteled lose some bits of his memory either permanently or for a long while, he also gets pretty corrupted, you don't see it when he's just chilling normally, but it shows whenever he gets really scared, and only becomes worse the worse his fear is, like fight or flight levels is a full on corruption mess, messy textures, (often) twitchy movement, along with a stuttery/distorted voice and all, so it's why his SF state is kinda all over the place if you know what he looks like in it, he's usually pretty vulnerable and hides away when like this but there's times when he can get aggressive and almost zombie like if he's too deep into it so ya never know, yes he has chased Austin before while like this which is funny but I mean it makes sense, imagine the person you're stuck with just starts acting weird in the dark ass space and starts running around and even chasing you, not even mentioning that they were your murderer, absolute nightmare for the big guy, it's like having a raccoon raid your home, imagine exacting your revenge on someone and because of that they have random chances to just become much more scary and maybe even more powerful than you are

^And yes the corruption is painful so eteled is just in more pain than what's normal for him, and it is possible for him to just fuckin lose his eyes or parts of himself while corrupted cause the code just goes absolutely bonkers during this form, he usually doesn't carry his axe with him if he's in ultimate locked on target mode, but sometimes he will and that is just ten times more dangerous for Austin, but it's not often at all cause he mostly carries it when he's more clear headed or scared and is using it for defense

After lots and lots of time, after the events of the Wii being saved, and Sam getting to know Austin, Kyle and Nathan a bit better, she tries to at the very least have everyone make peace with each other and get along, especially eteled and Austin, even though she is still unaware of their past (not for long), but it does start working, Sam, Nat and Kyle all start forming a friend group, and the two Miis, while struggling, do start getting sorta better, and even hang out sometimes on their own, when they feel comfortable enough to do so, they got some sort of connection going on there that they themselves can't even understand, they usually play sports together when the other three are out or are doing some form of work

^They technically knew each other longer than they originally thought since they were around each other and even talked a little as young kids, but even they forgot most details of that and when they switched schools they quickly became strangers, so yeah, childhood friends to strangers to coworkers to enemies to whatever the hell they are now

^Austin is gay as hell so yes the flirting never stayed in the days that he worked in the office, because after many, maaany years in the Wii, after getting along pretty well and having some sort of friendship grow between them, Austin of course starts doing it subtly again, not even sure why he's doing it himself, and eteled still doesn't understand or pick up on any of it, feeling like the guy is trying to gaslight him or some shit "Nah uh I know what you're up to, I've been through that same song and dance many times before"

Will and Sam make up and become pretty cool hang out buddies, Sam even reintroduces eteled and Will, by request of Will, cause he wants to talk and apologize for messing with the guy, and in turn eteled apologies for scaring him, but Will, now that he's older and looks back on it with more of a laugh, he actually thought it was pretty cool, that fact that the guy could pretty much just spook people outta the blue, although he was a little creeped out by it even now, overall they're on good terms

Jonathan is obviously torn so he's got the board in his basement and everything, and he works on it all the time, but each day he just grows more and more frustrated, not understanding why some of the evidence isn't making much sense, he knows Henry is guilty but some things aren't lining up perfectly or are just missing

Mike and Henry were literally close besties for years, worked by each other's sides, and even invited each other to their apartments, sometimes Henry would stick around and chill at his bestie's place for a few days, although Henry lives alone and usually likes it that way so it's not all the time, one big part being because of noise since he's learned to become very sensitive to it, he jumps and shivers at the sound of footsteps and creaking floors, hell even his own sometimes scare him, but Mike and him are very close, and have been through a lot together

I haven't figured everything out yet but somehow someway Mike finds out about Sam, and how she wants him to come over after hearing that he's eteled's old buddy, and when he comes over he learns everything, and him and eteled/Henry have a moment of being reunited and knowing that the other is okay, or at least kinda okay, Sam knows that Mike is trustworthy and obviously knows eteled from a different and much wider perspective than she does, so she allows him to come over and for the guys to talk and just update each other on things, as weird as it may look with some grown man talking to a little figure on a television, she can tell that they're happy to see one another again, they did talk about what had happened, about Austin's death, without Sam around, even though she knows everything already at this point and had already talked to Kyle, Austin, Nat and especially eteled about it, and while the news did definitely hit Mike straight in the gut, he also knew that it wasn't something Henry had planned or did without some sort of influence, he just felt it, not that it made it any better, but it had been years, no point in getting angry, he kinda figured Henry had something to do with it, but knew that it wasn't just that alone, and was too scared to say anything much sooner, so he sorta sympathizes with him, knowing they were both pushed beyond limits from their job and especially their boss, and that they're both in the wrong, although still holding Henry accountable for doing what he did, especially to Jonathan's brother, he wasn't gonna let him go off easy on that, but he doesn't hate Henry, and it shocks eteled that Mike even still cares about him after everything the guy went through during those times, but he appreciates it, and it seems like they still have a friendship going on

Jonathan is also informed about his brother, but this is done at a different time, later on after Mike and eteled reunited because Sam knew that this was gonna be a whole lot harder, Jonathan was Austin's brother, so it's needless to say how heavy this was gonna be, unbeknownst to Sam that Jonathan was already trying to get all the evidence to finally prove Henry guilty, even though the guy was dead and gone, at least as far as he knew, she also knew that this was gonna be hard for Austin and Kyle, who would both be present when Jonathan would come over, Sam debates whether she should even say anything and potentially reopen an old wound, but she goes ahead and only informs him about Austin, not eteled because she fears how Jonathan will react, especially if he connects the dots and realizes it's Henry

eteled is the only damn soul who knows exactly, in detail, what had happened after Austin's death and how he was talked down to and also threatened into keeping it on the down low, he and Mike are also the only ones who know just how bad they've been treated and how worse it can really get, but eteled hasn't told anybody, not a single person about any of it, other than when him and Mike used to comfort each other and talk about work issues, back when eteled was alive, he just tells no one now, not even when explaining himself and the past and what had happened between him and Austin, he just takes the full blame, half because of heavy guilt and the other half because he's terrified, even though the guy is miles away from that work building, is literally dead, is nowhere near his boss, his boss not even thinking about him anymore most likely, he still had that fear driven into him that if he said something that he'd be in trouble or that something terrible would happen, even though he's in a Wii and nobody can or would really do anything to him besides Austin, he still fears people in his past life, he also wouldn't wanna bring up all of the hidden info like "Hey my boss had a part in this" and have it turned down as if he were trying to take away some blame from himself, which he wouldn't be but is scared to come off that way

^Literally nobody would think like that or would treat eteled that way if he brought it up, but the guy thinks they would

A bit of a more light one, eteled and Austin have sort of made a day and night cycle for the Mii Channel, the light is more tame cause it can become blinding normally, and when people are resting or when it's around the time it would be dark outside, judging by the console's clock, then it would get darker and be more comfy

^Not to be confused with when the Channel just goes full on feral mode and gets pitch black dark or starts changing color cause that's usually Austin or eteled fucking with the atmosphere, like eteled causing it to go super dark like in SF sometimes when he's super upset or even "I'm gonna hunt you down" levels of corrupted

Henry had pretty great relationships with his bro and cousins, and he just hopes now that they're all okay, which they are, his cousins, Jane, Faith and Ellie are actively looking into the info and trying to figure out what really happened to their cousin, and his bro I haven't exactly figured out what to do with him yet aside from trying to do the same thing, but maybe being more exhausted and considering moving on cause living in the past is painful for him, and he is just not getting the right leads or ones that are pleasant, and doesn't wanna face the truth that his older sibling could've killed someone

Oh yeah, in current time, with the Wii already being saved years ago, everyone sorta getting along now and everything following after, everyone is pretty much grown up and are adults, so they work and are a tad less energetic as they were as teens, a tad I say because Kyle and Nathan are still hyper guys but they are having fun

Kyle and Nathan are besties to lovers, Will is gay but just hasn't found someone right yet so he vibes around, Sam isn't even sure what she is, she just feels happy on her own and likes spending time with the group she considers a family, Mike isn't sure what he is either but he does like Jonathan a little bit, Austin is bisexual and you can just tell by his energy alone /lh, first person to ever know about him being bi was his mom who is also bi so she just immediately is very accepting of him, and Henry/eteled seriously doesn't understand romantic love or how it works or what it truly looks or feels like, he doesn't even understand general love that much and is trying to learn it, so he doesn't even know what he would really be attracted to, he's just a trans guy sitting in his corner, only people he ever told about him being trans to was his mom when he was trying to understand himself (and she was a great woman so she tried to help him in his journey, while she was present at least) and Sam later on when they both got closer, other people had to kinda figure it out, aside from Austin who never knew for the longest time but was told by eteled later on when they've been in the Wii for a while, so Austin was one of the last ones to know

Mike had taken care of young Kyle from time to time, like when being invited over and/or if Jonathan had to go out real quick to attend to business or grab something

Sam does sometimes take eteled and Austin out to places when she learns to transfer them across devices, she also lets them occasionally mess around in Tomodachi Life whenever she comes back to play on it for memories, it always ends in some funny chaos and it's all around a nice time for everyone, or mostly everyone

eteled tries to play fair but sometimes he lets himself slip and accidentally go god mode again, or will get bored and just do it for fun, and Sam will cross her arms and look at him like "eteled I told you no more cheating" and he'd just roll his eyes saying "I'm sorryyy, it was an accident"

Henry immediately regretted what he did after he murdered Austin, and couldn't think of anything else for days and was miserable over it, even though Austin had seen him multiple times by watching from computer screens, the guy being in such a miserable state, he felt it was an act or something, and it only fueled Austin's anger, he wanted the guy dead, more than just dead, he wanted him to suffer endlessly, just when Austin was finally getting somewhere and was about to prove to the world that he existed and that he was special, it was taken from him, so he's gonna take something from Henry, Austin can't accept that Henry is sorry at all, he doesn't believe he is, and so he brings the guy down with him, making sure that it hurt (they're both assholes your honor)

Also yes Henry's mom was a bit emo, with some punk baddie in the mix, like mother like son

Wow this is long and I didn't even talk about everything else or go into more detail, but yeah I don't wanna make this overwhelmingly long so I'll stop here before I go on all night long because I've already been typing for some hours now

If I think of anything else I might edit this or make a different post about it but yeah thx for listening to me ramble on and on and on

[us2dinosaurplanet]

The Stay on Dinosaur Planet: Chapter 2-A Newborn Princess; Tricky’s Little Sister

Later that morning, Fox and Misty felt and heard a savage beast breathing on them. When they awoke, they saw that it was an Earthwalker breathing on them. They were spooked and lifted themselves up in a flash. Earthwalkers can seem monstrous when seen from down below, so it shouldn’t be surprising that Fox and Misty were spooked. Fox: “Whoa! If that was my wake up call, then I’m never complaining about my alarm clock again.” Misty: “You said it.” Earthwalker: “I’m sorry to wake you from such an unpleasant experience but this is urgent.” Fox: “How urgent?” Earthwalker: “Very, the king and queen needs me to bring you 2, the prince, and the blue and blonde little one to them right away. Something important is about to happen.” Fox: “Alright, alright, I’ll wake them.”

Fox kneeled in front of Bubbles and Tricky and shook them slightly. Fox: “Bubbles, Tricky, wake up, the king and queen need us.” Tricky: “(groan) Huh? Not now, mom. 5 more minutes, please.”

Fox then grabbed the two of them and shook them like an earthquake. Tricky: “OK, OK, I’m awake, I’m awake.”

Fox was able to drop them back on the ground. Fox: “It’s about time; the king and queen Earthwalker need us now, it’s urgent.” Tricky: “How urgent?” Fox: “Very, we need to return to Thorntail Hollow right away. Something important is going down.” Tricky: “Well why didn’t you say so, Fox? We need to return to Thorntail Hollow right away.” Fox: “I just said that.” Tricky: “Oh, right, sorry.”

Fox rolled his eyes.

Soon, Fox and Misty climbed on the Earthwalker’s back and rode it out of Cape Claw and into Thorntail Hollow followed by Bubbles and Tricky. When they arrived, they saw the king and queen Earthwalker waiting for them in the chamber. Tricky: “Mom! Dad! We arrived here as fast as we could. What’s the urgent news?” Queen Earthwalker: “I’m glad to see that you could make it, son. However, before we get to the urgent news there’s something we need to confess. During the attack of our army at the Krazoa Palace, your father and I hid something besides his gatekeeping powers behind the sacred seal. Within the hole of that wall is where it’s hidden. The reason I called your friends here is because my husband and I can’t seem to reach the hole.” Fox: “And you want one of us to try to get that thing that you can’t reach within the hole?” Queen Earthwalker: “Right.” Bubbles: “Leave this one to me, Fox.” Fox: “No, no, I’ll take care of this one, Bubbles.”

Misty flew over to Krystal, picked her up and flew away as Fox approached the hole. He reached inside the hole and pulled out an egg. The egg was sort of a darkish-pink color with brown spots and a yellow bottom. Tricky: “Oh, my gosh, that’s not what I think it is?” Bubbles: “What is it?” Tricky: “It’s an Earthwalker egg!” Bubbles: “Oh! (gasp) Oh, my gosh, that’s not what I think it is?”

Fox, Misty, the queen and king Earthwalker laughed at Bubbles’ cute remark. Queen Earthwalker: “But indeed it is. The king and I worried that Scales would use it to threaten us once he found it. So your father hid the egg behind the sacred seal, as well as his powers.” Fox: “So, securing the egg within the hole to make sure that Scales doesn’t grab hold of the egg even if he found a way to crack open the seal?” King Earthwalker: “Right.” Fox: “So how long will it be until it hatches?” Queen Earthwalker: “Oh, I believe the answer to that question will arrive soon, Fox.” Fox: “Uh…what exactly is that suppose to mean…? Huh?”

Suddenly, the egg shattered and revealed a cute little Earthwalker covered in yolk. However, the Earthwalker wasn’t the only person covered in yolk. Fox: “Er, congratulations, it’s a girl.” Misty: “Wow! She’s beautiful.” Tricky: “Oh, wow! I can’t believe it! I have a sister! Alright! Woo-hoo!”

Tricky started jumping up and down with excitement. Tricky: “Mom, dad, you’re the best!” Fox: “Protecting this baby from General Scales was worth it for you, Tricky, and all of us, even me. You guys should be proud of your efforts.” Queen Earthwalker: “And we are proud. Thank you, Fox.” Fox: “Don’t mention it. So, what will you name her?”

The king and queen looked at each other and then back at Fox. Queen Earthwalker: “Well, actually, Fox, we’ve decided that you should name her.” Fox: “What? You can’t be serious.” King Earthwalker: “Oh, but we are. It’s the least we can do after what you and your friends have done for our world.” Fox: “Oh, well…um…that’s…awfully nice of you but to be honest…I’m…um…not very good with names.” Bubbles: “Don’t worry, Fox. Misty and I will lend you a helping hand.” Fox: “Really? That’s great. I was hoping you would say that.”

Fox, Misty, and Bubbles turned away from the king and queen and huddled. Fox: “Ok, girls, we need to think up a name for this Earthwalker child. Got any suggestions?” Bubbles: “How about Cutie?” Fox:” Mm, I don’t think so, Bubbles. It’s…sounding kind of strange. I mean, I agree with you; she IS cute, but she won’t remain like this forever. Try something else.” Bubbles: “Oh!” Misty:” I’ve got one, since she’s so beautiful, we should call her Beautiful.” Fox: “No, sorry, Misty. Not catchy enough, either. Do you have something else?” Misty: “Well, my first suggestion was Beauty, but…” Bubbles: “I like it!” Misty: “You do?” Fox: “Yeah, Beauty, that’s a perfect name. Misty, you’re a genius.” Misty: “I am? Oh, Fox, you’re just saying that.” Fox: “No, I mean it, and you’ve always have been for the past 9 year that we’ve known each other.”

Oh, brother, once again, you see Fox and Misty staring into each other’s eyes very deeply but have they find out that they were in love with each other, yet? NO! When in the name of Star Haven are they going to figure it out?

Soon, they turned backed to the king and queen. Fox: “Our minds are made up. We have decided to name this Earthwalker Princess Beauty.” Queen Earthwalker: “That’s a wonderful name, Fox.” King Earthwalker: “I agree, you didn’t do too badly for someone who was bad with names.” Fox: “Well, actually, it was Misty’s idea.”

Fox then handed Beauty to Bubbles. Fox: “Here, Bubbles, take Beauty for me, I rush over to the river and wash this yolk off me before I start going ballistic. (Laugh)”

Bubbles chased after Fox. The queen and king left the chamber along with Tricky. Misty put Krystal down and chased after the others. Suddenly, Krystal slightly opened her eyes and turned towards the exit. Krystal: “Oh, Fox, someday you, too will discover that you have a sister, as well: me.”

[rittz]

thoughts about being trans, idk where else to put them so here u go

it’s not like i don’t have trans guy friends to talk to about this, it’s just usually in the form of jokes or passing comments rather than an actually serious conversation. also, the transmasc people that i’m closest to identify more with the label “nonbinary” than i do-- it’s not like they couldn’t understand or relate to things i’m saying, but i’m just assuming that they probably don’t feel the exact same way i do

anyway, as a trans person we get often asked “so why do you feel like a [gender]?”, and the answer is usually some variation of “i just feel like it”. this is the most accurate but also vaguest possible answer, so i kinda wanted to break down my personal answer to that question?

basically, i identify as a man because i identify with men. in a general and also personal sense. gender stereotypes are something that trans people by necessity both embrace and reject. i relate to gender stereotypes about men more than those of women-- i’m less outwardly emotional, i like being handy, i don’t like kids, i have questionable personal hygiene, etc-- but obviously these things alone don’t make someone a man. however... you can’t deny that there is some general truth about behavioral differences between men and women (bc of society, not biology). men and women both experience different problems in the world, and each have trouble understanding the experiences and problems of the other. generally, i can relate to the experiences and problems of men more than those of women, even if it seems like i shouldn’t (for example, i am not afraid of walking alone at night, even though i am very tiny).

i, from a young age, have had a constant yearning for more male friends. i would occasionally choose to play video games as a male character. i was upset that i couldn’t be in boy scouts. i have been jealous of my younger brothers being treated by my parents the ways i wished i was treated. when i imagined myself older, i pictured myself less like my mom and more like my dad. when i’m around men, i want them to treat me like one of them. i want to be seen as a man.

and i think that’s what being trans really boils down to. wanting to be seen as someone other than how everyone sees you. wanting what you see on the outside to match how you feel on the inside. this obviously extends to nonbinary individuals, who face their own struggle when it comes to presentation. but at the end of the day, i think that presentation is equally important to gender identity as internal feelings. i mean, i think we’re all familiar with the research proving that transitioning makes trans people happier. surgery is an invasive, expensive, painful process that i DON’T think is necessary for every trans person, and HRT isn’t always easy to get. but changing a name, getting a new haircut, dressing differently, binding, etc. counts as transitioning. you don’t have to hate your body to be trans, but wanting to alter it in order to better connect your internal identity with your presentation, i think is necessary in order to consider yourself to be trans. 

i will admit i am confused by “GNC trans men” i see on tumblr and insta, who use he/him pronouns but exclusively present femininely. i’m not talking about trans guys who don’t yet pass, i mean trans guys who don’t want to. i don’t harbor any ill will, i’m just confused. if i understand being trans to mean “wanting what you see on the outside to match how you feel on the inside”, you can see how. doesn’t that make you feel dysphoric? don’t you want people who see you to read you as male? how is your life different from when you didn’t identify as male but presented the same way? this isn’t me trying to gatekeep on who’s “trans enough”, and especially when it comes to nonbinary identities it’s arbitrary to harp on presentation like this. but like, what’s going on here?

taking a turn here that will come back around, an extremely key component to why i identify as and with men is my sexuality. i have always idolized, envied, and evoked various queer icons from media and real life. the hunky, grunting, macho, hetero version of “man” never appealed to me the way that the fashionable, artsy, flirty, homo version of “man” did. drag queens, my mom’s hairdresser, glam rock stars, i could go on. associating my more feminine qualities with GAY stereotypes instead of FEMALE stereotypes suddenly made more sense, and made me feel less dysphoric. it’s also something that took me a long time to realize, because i had surrounded myself with queers who were mostly attracted to women. transmascs and butch lesbians historically have a lot in common, but personally, i didn’t relate as much to lesbians as i did to drag queens. in dating and loving men, i developed my understanding of them. but my attraction to men was why it had taken me so long to realize i felt more like a man-- i thought i was just some weird straight girl.

now, am i calling these “GNC gay trans men” with long pink hair and poofy skirts and conventionally attractive bisexual boyfriends “weird straight girls”? ...well, not to their faces. but i have to admit that i’m thinking it. these people would never go to a predominantly-male gay bar, these people would never be harassed on the street. i’m not saying i know someone’s identity better than they do, but i don’t agree with the liberal utopian ideal of “let everyone do whatever they want as long as they aren’t hurting anyone” when taken to mean that we can’t question other people’s choices. “why do you feel like a man?” is a question that, coming from another trans person, isn’t inherently transphobic. it’s not “forcing” someone to “prove” their “transness”, no one “owes” me an explanation of their identity. i’m just confused. i don’t disapprove of the way these people live their lives, i just want to know why.

a straight girl being feminine is different from a gay man being feminine, because it has less to do with personality and more to do with society’s historic view of gay men as closer to female than male because of the loving and fucking men aspect. an AMAB gay man wearing makeup and a crop top probably just wants to look good, but he is also signaling to other men that he’s gay via gender non-conformance. by being AFAB and female-passing, wearing makeup and a crop top is not GNC. in fact it’s pretty GC, and gay men will not recognize you as a gay man.

it’s easy to say “gender is fake so do whatever you want”, but like, we have to acknowledge reality. time is a social construct too, but we still use days of the week when talking to each other. strangers will treat you differently depending on what gender they interpret you as. different people will be willing to date you or not. you have to choose which public bathroom to go in. if being misgendered doesn’t bother these people, then who cares? but if it DOES, which it usually does, wouldn’t you want to take steps to prevent being misgendered in the future? if your desire to present femininely is stronger then your desire to be seen as male, then like... why call yourself a male at all? ultimately nothing these people do will really affect me in any way. it just makes me wonder if these people will eventually go on to present as male, or if they will later ID as nonbinary or even cis. i encourage people trying out different labels and exploring their identity, so it’s not like i think these people SHOULDN’T identify as trans guys. it’s more like, i wish they were able to articulate WHY they identify as trans more than “because i said so”. not wanting to be a woman doesn’t automatically make you a man, it just makes you not a woman.

maybe i’m particularly cynical because of the MULTIPLE times that people with larger online followings who identify and present this way have later turned out to be lying, manipulative people. hopefully it goes without saying that i do NOT think that everyone who identifies and presents this way is a toxic liar. the reason i bring it up is because some people genuinely can’t understand the possibility or purpose of misleadingly claiming a marginalized identity, but it can and does happen. an analogy could be made here about white people claiming indigenous heritage. we all WANT to believe what people say about themselves, and asking for “proof” is a social no-no. but we shouldn’t just... automatically trust everything someone says about themselves, right? and as bad as i WANT to live in a world where gender doesn’t matter and everyone default uses neutral pronouns and there are no divisions in clothing stores and bathrooms, we don’t live in that world (yet). when you are AFAB, /extremely/ femininely presenting, and have little to no plans of transitioning, saying “i am a man” will not make other people see you as one. and if you don’t want to be seen as a man, then maybe you aren’t one.

[system-of-a-feather]

So here are some loose thoughts and reflections on integration (as an integrated part) that I would love to hear if anyone had similar or contrasting experiences.

Personally, I would like to go ahead and state that in my experience, integration is by no means a “suddenly fused together” sort of situation. I would say internally there was a point where “two became one” but I would like to think internally that is more of a projection of being “locked in” so to say than it is the actual integration. For myself, I had the internal integration 3+ years before I actually completed the integration. It took three years, plus nine months to be what I officially consider my integrated self and I very much did want to say that since I feel there is this atmosphere of integration that it is something that should and always happens quickly. For me, it took nearly 4 years after deciding to integrate to properly integrate.

For context, I am an integrated part of Lucille 1.0 (academic protector, royal know-it-all, egotistical prick) and Mina (previous primary gatekeeper, caretaker, ISH) and now identify still as Lucille, but am now primary protector, pretentious prick, academic-protector, caretaker, ISH, and secondary gatekeeper (which is a complex term we use that isn’t relevant)

During the process of integration, it was a lot of learning to interact and recognize the conflicting feelings of both of my parts - letting them interact and interacting with both myself and just trying to come to terms and an understanding of what the parts wanted and what they needed - to resolve a lot of the internal tension and distress and regrets that the parts had and in the process, lessen the intense driving need that drove parts that were open to integrating apart to be seperate.

During the first few months or deciding I actually had to process the integration (rather than simply saying I did and clinging to the identity of Lucille 1.0) I am pretty sure I probably looked like a sub-system of sorts with how poorly blended the parts were. The more I actually looked at the state of my integrated self, the less I could manage or control the emotional swings of both sides and the more I had to sit down and try to make sense of all the disjointed and unconnected pieces to put them together.

At this point in my life as an integrated alter, I would like to think that I have mostly brought together the conflicting feelings, tastes, confidence levels, and core defining emotional traits, core beliefs, and major fears to work with one another - to agree and blend well into a cohesive whole. At this point, I am a lot more at ease and peace and able to exist happily as both Mina and Lucille 1.0 but also neither Mina and Lucille 1.0. I am me and I am very much both and both do still exist, but the ability to see them as different is less and less frequent - and as distressing as that might sound to someone not in the position, it has brought so much intense peace and comfort to feel more whole and relaxed.

With that being said, a thing I had intentionally left off that list is memory as to be quite honest, Mina had a massive memory bank and history as the previous gatekeeper and probably one of our longest veterans in the system. She was the system mom before Aderis was the system mom. She built most of the inner world from the ground up and created the structures that Ray now explores and tries to learn. She knew everyone and had a place in literally ever alter in this system’s heart. She literally was a godsend to the system that could get along with any and all part and it was magnificent

But with all that work and history she had with the system, I really struggle to even start trying to piece together the rather simple history that Lucille 1.0 held and work through Mina’s memory to put them together. At this point, while the emotional and cognitive aspects of the two of them are mostly blended, I still have their memories considerably segregated from one another and accessing Mina’s in particular can take time as well as will still be mentally considered to be “Mina’s memory” and not “my memory” as it is.

Oddly enough, a situation came about where I really did feel the need to reach into that massive barrel of her old memories and retrieve something and by god did it feel odd to be remembering something and when mentioning it to someone say “I am sorry, here is what went on and this is what was meant” to something that wasn’t innately Lucille 1.0 or my current self’s action. Logically by all means, I feel as though to say “Mina said this and Mina meant that” but on an emotional value level, the dialogue is fully stuck as “I wanted to say this is the how it was and I wanted to mention this.”

For a moment, my logical and cognitive brain very much wanted to different the Mina-labeled memory as something Mina wanted to say, but no matter what the label said, I interpreted as something I personally wanted to say and something I remembered. It was very odd but also reassuring because I had never so clearly reassured and noted to myself that I am Mina, I am Lucille 1.0 and I am Lucille.

Riku had a very strong relationship and dynamic with Lucille 1.0 back in the day - I am still that person. Unnamed alters and Mina had a really strong relationship and strong values back in the day and - I *am* still that person.

A large part of me had always looked up to Mina and saw her as great and amazing and I know it was a bit of a cornerstone that kept me from properly and fully integrating with her. A part of me felt it was impossible and felt I could never live up to what she was and I could never be half as wonderful as I saw her to be, but now I am here, recognizing that I really am also Mina and that I am also all of what I never thought I would be and I don’t know.

It is really just something great. Take from it what you will, but it is really something I hadn’t properly experienced through my time as an integrated part, and I really do appreciate it.

Feel free to share if you have any similar comments and feel free to reblog. To be honest, I feel there are too few comments on some of the positive aspects or what integration looks like / felt like.

-Lucille (Primary Protector)

[hadesglance]

All hail the new queen... - 27 (Hades Original Story)

You fought your way through the maze of the underworld to make a deal with the King…intrigued the lonely king listens…

Part One  Part Two  Part Three  Part Four  Part Five  Part Six Part Seven  Part Eight   Part Nine  Part Ten  Part Eleven Part Twelve  Part Thirteen  Part Fourteen  Part Fifteen  Part Sixteen Part Seventeen  Part Eighteen  Part Nineteen   Part Twenty  Part Twenty-One   Part Twenty-Two  Part Twenty-Three  Part Twenty-Four  Part Twenty-Five  Part Twenty-Six

*Gif credits unknown! Cause I used to be a horrible human! Sorry!!!! :(

Hades stared out the back windows at the river. How he envied the water and how it only had one purpose, to move forward. The river didn’t have emotions to deal with or anyone to protect. The river didn’t have a loved one angry with them for trying to do what was best for them.

“You did the right thing.” Hera put a hand on his arm pulling him from his thoughts, “She’ll be home before you know it.”

“It still doesn’t feel right…” He glanced at her crossing his arms over his chest, “She was so angry, Hera.”

Hera smiled trying to be reassuring, “Y/N, will forgive you. She knows that you’re doing all this to keep her and her family safe.”

Hades took in a deep breath shaking his head, “You know what she said when I told her that?”

“No, what?” She stared at him with curiosity.

“You’re my family, all of you.” Hades let his arms drop defeated, “It’s strange, I feel like a part of me is missing. We’ve rarely been apart since she arrived.”

Hera looked over at Zeus discussing something with Apollo, “I know what you mean.”

Hades looked at her again before looking at his brother, “After everything he’s done, you really forgave him, truly?”

“I did.” She smiled at Hades taking in a deep breath, “It wasn’t easy, and it certainly didn’t happen overnight, it didn’t even happen for several years. He did change, Hades and he tries so much harder…he is a good father and a wonderful husband, and I love him very much.”

“You always have. You always knew you two were meant for one another.” Hades pulled her into a hug kissing her forehead, “If you can forgive him, then there’s hope for me.”

“Hades…” He let Hera go turning to Zeus. His brother looked worn, something he wasn’t used to seeing, “I have Apollo meeting up with Hermes. They’re going back to the school, maybe there’s something he left that will indicate where he went.”

“Doubtful…” Hades sighed looking at Zeus as he took Hera’s hand in his. His heart ached as he longed for a simple touch from you. Your support had gotten him through so much this past year, “He’s been biding his time for this. Y/N said it herself, he wants me.”

“But why?” Hera shook her head confused, “He took all of us and tortured us. He lost, what good will it be to go after just you again?”

“Because I’m the first son…his failed prodigy.” Hades swallowed thinking back to earlier with you. He’d been so worried as he paced in the kitchen until you came in through the garage entrance.

“Y/N…” He pulled you into a hug after you took you helmet off. He pulled away looking at your tear stained face, “Are you alright? Did he hurt you?”

“I’m okay…he didn’t hurt me…he just talked to me.” You told him stepping into his chest again so he would hug you again, “I didn’t think he’d look so normal…”

Hades frowned shutting his eyes as he held your close allowing you a brief moment of solace, “I know…I don’t want to push you but…I need to ask you a few things.”

“Right…of course…” You pulled away as you heard barking down the hall worry filling your soft eyes, “Is everything okay here?”

He sighed nodding a little, “Yes…Poseidon and Apollo are here…”

“Are they okay?” Your eyes got wide.

“Yes, we were searching for Media and the others.” He told you quietly.

“Others…Cronus, h-he said something about keeping a few others…” He watched as you began to dissolve on him, “Who is it?”

“…Athena and Ares…” He spoke softly trying to keep you calm as he guided you to the dining room to sit, “They are capable and can survive this, and we will find them.”

You sat as he knelt in front of you keeping your hands in his. Despite everything you seemed to be taking everything as well as one could. He didn’t think he’d be able to if he was in your position.

“Y/N, I need you to tell me everything that happened, can you do that?” Hades squeezed your hands reassuringly.

You sniffed as a tear fell down your cheek striking his hand. It burned rolling down his skin as you began telling him everything. It did seem like Cronus was verifying until he had no doubt that you were his companion.

“It was like he was fact checking me…making sure I was who he really thought I was.” You looked at him frowning, “He made me feel so small.”

“He has that effect on people.” He brought your hands to his lips kissing them, “You won’t have to worry about him anymore.”

“Y-you found him?” Your eyes followed him as he stood up.

“No…but you’re going to go home until this is over.” He turned away from you preparing himself for what you had to say.

“…but I am home.” God…just a simple phrase broke his heart. He’d fought so hard to get you to that point. To accept that this place was safe, and comfortable, and where you could be when the world was ending. Where you could be with him.

But, he needed to send you away. To ensure nothing would happen to you or your family. You didn’t deserve this.

“And one day I hope you can return.” He could hear you stand up behind him.

“Hades…please don’t…” The pain in your voice was enough to make him reconsider, “Please don’t send me away…”

And this place just made everything you were feeling that much more. Agony rippled through him, “You’ll be safer with your family…”

You moved in front of him grabbing into his arms tears already falling once more, “You’re my family, all of you…please Hades, don’t…I need to be next to you through this…”

He wanted nothing more than to keep you by his side. He swallowed taking your hands away from him, “You will be safer…away from me…Cronus will only use you against me.”

“Don’t you see this is exactly what he wants!” You shook your head staring into his eyes, “He wants you to be alone, he wants you to feel isolated, please Hades don’t do this! Please…”

He did it anyway, sending you with Hermes to drop you off and set up a protection spell over your family’s homes. He knew he wouldn’t be able to let you go if he did it himself.

“Hades?” Zeus got his attention, “Where were you just now?”

Hades looked at him and Hera giving them a small sad smile, “With my heart…”

Hera quickly embraced him, “We will make fast work of this and bring everyone home.”

Charon popped in suddenly, “Forgive the intrusion, your majesties…I’ve just received word from Olympus. Athena is there.”

“What?” Zeus’ eyes widened as he stepped over to the gatekeeper, “Did they say if she was okay?”

“The message said she is hurt but managing and requesting an audience with her father.” Charon told him quickly.

“Go, both of you.” Hades told them as he handed Hera back to Zeus, “I won’t be long after.”

Zeus stepped over to him offer his arm to him, “Brother, we will get this bastard and reunite you with Y/N. I won’t let him live this time.”

Hades clasped his brother’s arm firmly giving him a nod, “Go to your daughter. I’m just closing up shop here.”

Zeus nodded letting go, “Don’t take long…none of this feels right.”

Hades had to agree with his brother as he watched them leave. After assuring him he’d be right there a few more time, they left leaving him alone to his thoughts. A dangerous scenario if there ever was one.

He wandered the halls from room to room seeing you everywhere. Little things that he hoped to bring you back to soon. You’d only been gone a few hours, yet it’s felt like eternity. You filled a hole inside of him that he'd grown so numb to until you began to heal it.

He went to each room shutting the doors. He’d already sent Cerberus back to his post in the Underworld. All that was left was the Shades and Charon.

He walked into his office to grab his work. Not even Cronus could stop the Underworld from working. Stepping over to his desk, his phone went off. He opened the text smiling a little despite the pain he felt reading it. You weren’t made enough to not text, it was a good sign.

At mom’s, Hermes just left…please be safe…

He took a moment to answer you. It was the least he could do.

I will, I promise this will be over soon. I love you.

He sniffed setting down the phone to look at everything he needed to bring. He heard a shuffling noise behind him assuming it was your favorite wandering soul, “Lilly, I'd like you to gather everyone in the foyer for a meeting, please.”

Hades felt his blood run cold at the response, as his phone buzzed on his desk going unattended.

You sat on the couch looking out the window rubbing your chest. It had been a week since you’d been forced to leave, and you were bitter. No matter what you did you couldn’t shake this ache in your heart.

He didn’t even have the decency to drop you off…now he was rarely texting you and when he did it was short. Merely hello…goodbye…good…ok…soon… It didn’t matter that Hades was a god, he was a typical man.

You let out a heavy sigh again making your mother speak up, “He’ll be home soon…”

“I know…I’m just worried. He said he had a lot of work and it might take longer.” You rambled off the story you created for her, “Just wish I could have gone with him.”

“Y/N…” You blinked looking over to her, she rarely ever used your name anymore, “I have never seen a man look at anyone like how Nick looks at you…not since your father…”

You got up walking over to where she sat, in your father’s chair, “Oh ma…there will never be a love as bright as you and dad’s.”

When you hugged her, she patted your arm, “Don’t worry…you and Nick will be fine. Distance always helps a relationship. My heart ached when your father went to a Greece, but he always returned.”

You smiled at her, “I know…it’s just hard. I feel like half of me is missing and I can tell he stressed out. I feel it right here.”

You pressed on your chest as this dull ache surged for a moment. Your mother put her hand over yours before smiling, “It’s probably heartburn, I’ll make you lunch!”

You let out a soft laugh as she got up. Of course, everything could be solved with food. You stretched as you walked back to the couch.

You were just about to sit down when the door burst open, “Y/N!”

You stood there startled as Zeus looked over to you holding on the doorknob, “Wh-what are you doing!?”

“We need you. You have to come.” He raced over to you plant his hands firmly in your arms, “Hades needs you.”

“...Hello boy...”

[jaskanetic]

It's 2 AM bois so here's some fun fact about me.

I am a very genuine person, when I speak.

Everything I say, is honest.

And I know it's probably hard to believe.

But I am, genuine, when it comes to speech.

Which I guess, makes my way of speech kinda weird?

I ALWAYS say what I think and feel, in the heat of the moment.

I don't really gatekeep much, because I'm dumb and forget, and also because at the same time, I want to be an honest and trustworthy person. And so, being 100% honest about what you think and feel should be a thing, right?

My brain isn't usually on par much, when I talk.

During a conversation, I will say exactly what I think and what I feel. If I tell you "I care about you a lot" it is extremely genuine. If I say "I don't like X thing much", I am being honest. If I say "I don't like what you said about X thing", then I am being honest. And I usually follow that last one with "that's my opinion" or "I'm just not comfortable with it".

I WILL tell you when I am not comfortable.

I WILL tell you if you've made me upset.

I WILL voice if I don't want to see you.

On a side note;

It's come to my attention sometimes, the way I speak is confusing.

Did I say that already? Idk I'm too lazy to scroll up.

When I'm in a conversation, my mind is a mix of all over the place, and focused on just one thing. It has always been like that.

While talking, I will be both focused on the present, while also rereading past messages, thinking about the past tense and future tense of the conversation. I will consider how the other person(s) may think or feel, but I will also consider on how I think or feel. Or I might just zone out in general and forget everything. I overthink.

I will still say, exactly, what I feel and think, in that exact moment.

Sometimes, if it's a long conversation, what I think or feel will quickly change, especially after I've just gained new knowledge.

Let's say, I wake up one day and I'm sad because my mom isn't talking to me. And I start to vent about it. Everything I say in that exact moment is exactly what I'm thinking and feeling, right then. Let's say, while I'm venting, my mom comes in my room and says something nice. And then suddenly, my mood changes, and what I feel, think, and say, will change right then as well.

It's like.... Being a car engine. When I'm on, I run, and how I run changes based on what it is that's happening. Like if my brakes start being wonky, or I slow down from low battery, or if the AC stops because I'm out of water. And then you add whatever to me and suddenly the situation changes.

And after, so very long, I'm beginning to think maybe this is why some people find me, guilt, trippy?

And here's what I have to say about that:

I really don't ever have bad intentions for anyone.

I really do just say what I think and feel in the moment.

I'm a human being.

My opinions are constantly changing.

I have a desire for trust in not just others, but myself, and that requires I be 100% honest in everything I say and do.

My feelings, constantly change.

I can understand, being confused when I'm suddenly enlightened mid-convo.

But never in my life ever have I ever sat down and told myself "wow can't wait to make someone do what I want by making them feel bad."

Because that's super scummy. Disgusting. Revolting. Pathetic.

People who know me KNOW, that when I am AWARE of WHAT I did wrong, I will apologise for it and make an attempt to do better.

People who know me, know, I feel like absolute shit if I make someone even marginally, even slightly offput or upset.

People who know me know, I'm even afraid of being anything but memey friend fun times because I don't want to make other people sad by being sad.

If by chance, I do not apologise, or do not change, it is simply because: I have no idea I did something wrong.

And those who know me, know, I will never bite them for confronting me about something I said or did that made them upset.

I welcome it.

Because those who know me, hopefully, know that I value their wants, needs, and comforts, over all else. Yeah, video games and memes are fun, but bro, you're emotions are valid. And if like, I'm making you feel some weird vibe, please tell me.

If I say something, in a convo, and I seem guilt trippy. I promise you, I am just saying exactly how I feel and think, in the heat of the moment. And that, through the conversation, my thoughts and feels have most than likely changed based on new knowledge.

That's it. That's literally it.

Like I really would never want to guilt anyone. I'm just. Emotional. And human. So my thoughts and all change constantly.

I've made effort to change, and I have. In the sense that, I am a lot more laid back than I used to be.

So the way I speak is less emotional and more casual and thought out.

Yes. Believe it or not. I now think before I say things.

And I guess that summaries it doesn't it?

Basically I say what I feel and I'm dumb and don't think before I talk because brain don't work so good.

And I'm deeply sorry, to any friends who may have felt guilt tripped because of it.

I promise you I'd never intend that.

I just.

Don't think before I act. It's a problem I've been working on and I promise I've gotten better. I've already recieved confirmation I have by a friend I've been spending a lot of time with. I'm trying to think before I speak because I genuinely do care about how other's feel and want to be considerate, but I'm trying to find a middle ground in that I can be honest with myself and how I feel, while also being more careful in what I say. It's easy to do on paper, but the hard part is actually training my brain into that healthier mindset. I know I'm a lot different than I was, but I have a long ways to go.

But TLDR;

I'm sorry if the way I speak confuses anyone. I'm more chill than I was months ago, but I still tend to run all over the place while speaking, and my feelings as I talk tend to shift a lot mid-convo. And I'm sorry if I seem a certain way while speaking, I never intend any harm, I am merely sharing how I genuinely think and feel. With no intentions to influence you whatsoever. I am just trying to be honest is all.

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

And if this is also confusing, sorry about that aixjsjxhshxhebxbenxnen. It happens, I'm working on it.

[keyofshadows]

I'm missing playing with my friends in Snapshots canon, so I felt like sharing. The stuff under the cut is part 2 of the log that happened after this.

Amaya removing the corruptive part of Kai's Darkness, aka Part 1 of the log.

In the morning, 'Jem was busy shooing everyone out of the kitchen so she could do something about feeding them. It didn't help that Soren wouldn't leave.

"Come on, he never sleeps this late. Just let me stick my head in there, I promise not to set his bed on fire. I'll just throw a cookie at him!"

"You do, and I'll tell him you were the one that took his spell book."

"Awe 'Jem, I thought you liked me! If you want me to die, just toss me at a monster in the Maw or something."

"I was saving that for Eli, for not telling us before they did anything."

Eli squeaked and shot Ronan a look from across the table where they were both sitting. "It was Kai's decision! And it was a good one too...at least so far."

He'd thought about checking in on Amaya when he'd gotten up, then decided to let her have her privacy. She'd make an appearance when she felt like it.

Amaya slept curled up in a ball as per usual, and as per usual, she was up before the sun. She had gotten into the habit of watching the sunrise and sunset every day and night. Something that she never got back home.

What she healed from Kai was still there, however it wasn’t acting up right now. That was a good sign, she could have a quiet morning. She couldn’t help the feeling that something was watching her. Adion was back in complete slumber form, nothing but a naggy crystal on her glove.

Said nagging said it was time for food and if Amaya didn’t comply, it wouldn’t be a quiet morning. Rather than thinking of trying to go down the stairs after entering the bedroom through the window, Amaya decided to come in the front door again. The only familiar face was Eli and the slightly familiar face was ‘Jem.

“Hi… I went out early this morning.” She started, knowing that was the question she was going to get for coming through the front door. “Sorry about last night, something came up and it had to be sorted out.”

The amount of times she had apologized in her life made up a good quarter of her spoken vocabulary, she would swear by it.

"Oh hey, I was wondering where you were." Eli waved at her, then gestured to Ronan. "He told me he dreamed a girl with lavender hair, so I guess you met him when you came back with Kai. Sort of met him. Anyway, this is Ronan, Kai's kid brother."

Ronan flushed at being reminded that he'd apparently been that out of it, ducking his head in greeting. He could still be a little shy when he was embarrassed about something. Eli reached across the table and patted his head before pointing at the other brunette hanging around the kitchen doorway.

"That's Soren, Kai's worst nightmare- Ow, Ronan!" Obviously someone just got kicked under the table. Eli made a face before continuing. "Fine, Ronan's boyfriend and Kai's worst nightmare." He scooted his chair back to avoid another kick while Soren smirked.

"Pretty accurate description. Nice to meet you. What'd you do to Kai, exactly? He's not going to be an angel now, is he?"

Eli rolled his eyes. "I told you he'll be fine. Don't go saying stuff that'll get 'Jem going again, I'm already gonna bruise."

'Jem looked maybe a little too satisfied with herself at that, then turned her attention to Amaya.

"Hungry? I was just about to force feed them real food, you're welcome to something."

Soren ducked into the kitchen long enough to emerge with a poptart. "This is real food, quit trying to poison us with your eggs and oatmeal."

Amaya waved to Soren and Ronan, trying not to dwell too much on the hair fact. Adion had decided to laze about in Amaya’s cowl hood, ignoring the fact that some people in the room didn’t know he existed yet.

“Kai is fine, just getting some needed sleep.” That was a half assumption. Adion wiggled around at the mention of Kai’s name. He didn’t forget about his tactical revenge.

Amaya automatically answered the food question. “I’m -”

Adion tugged on her hair with her braid, knowing exactly what she was going to say. She was going to eat and that was going to be it.

“-am going to have my mind made up for me so if it isn’t too much trouble.” She finished speaking to ‘Jem, swatting Adion back onto her shoulder. Amaya was now waiting on questions from everyone but Eli about the tiny dragon on her shoulder.

Then she had an idea.

“Adion why don’t you go see if he’s awake or not.”

That would get him out of her hair for a few minutes. He knew this, but he disappeared from sight anyway. Bugging Kai was going to become a regular thing while he was here.

In other words, it was Kai’s turn for a new dragon hat, whether he realized it or not.

'Jem bit her lip for a moment, then nodded. "If you're sure he's okay..." She gave Eli another look, and he sunk down in his chair.

"He does need the rest though, I mean, c'mon. Eat, study, fight, annoy Soren, sleep only if everyone else is...but he's gotten better!" He added as Ronan kicked him again.

There being a little dragon hanging around near Amaya's head didn't seem to phase 'Jem at all. She only smiled at the other girl's answer and went to get the food, while the two boys who hadn't been adventuring last night stared in silence. At least until Ronan let out a squeak.

"You have a dragon? How do you have a dragon?" He cast a suspicious glance at Eli. "What did you do now?"

"Hey. Why does everyone assume I'm in trouble all the time?"

Soren was trying to hold back a snicker and failing miserably. "Because you usually are. I'm still blaming Kai for that, though. I want to believe your mom when she claims you're an angel."

Eli only grumbled before inviting Amaya to join him and Ronan at the table. Soren was trying to peer into the hallway after Adion.

Kai had, in fact, slept pretty well. One of the first things he'd done when he'd woken and the memory of the night before had hit him, was to reach out and open a Corridor. Seeing it there just a few feet away was reassuring, and he'd gotten up and decided to test things out. So while everyone else had been going about their business (and his, it wasn't like Eli hadn't been loud when 'Jem had whacked him), he'd been tossing ice spheres through the Corridor and catching them when they emerged from another he'd opened closer to the door. He supposed he should probably go eat something. Maybe he could steal a poptart while 'Jem was distracted.

Closing both Corridors, he opened his door. He needed to see if Amaya was still around too, she'd said she'd check on him.

Amaya slowly walked towards the table, out of habit in mid explanation. “Technically he is a Bahamut species Essence Beast. Has been for 8 years now.”

Amaya remembered when she first met Eli and how to not bring that up. She was good at not bringing things up.

“He does get bigger.”

Adion was quietly snooping around the halls when he found Kai poking his head out of his room. Or at least the door was open. He was about to go bother him when he felt something shift. One of his senses as an Essence Beast tied to a Gatekeeper was sensing when other keepers opened gates. He got that sense now and not knowing who it was, bolted down the hallway and before he knew it, he was buried in Amaya’s neck.

She wasn’t expecting it of course, but his surprise and him being surprised was enough for some mild concern. He started making noises at Amaya in attempts to communicate quickly.

“Hey slow down, what was it?”

Adion growled at her.

“What do you mean you sensed a Gate Passage?”

Adion continued to snarl and growl in a rapid manner. Amaya looked at her pocket, and pulled out a dull crystal. It didn’t respond or seem to respond to any of her magic.

“Oh, that’s fantastic.” Amaya sighed, and put a hand to her face. “Do you know where they are now?”

Adion pointed out the window. Then almost as if it was scripted, there was a knock on the door. Amaya knew who that was.

“She is never going to let this one go.”

Ronan was obviously still a bit in awe about Adion. "Essence Beast?" He knew what the Bahamut part was, at least. "I've never seen anything like him before. My brother has, once, but that was mostly Eli's fault."

Apparently a lot of things were mostly Eli's fault from the way he tried to see how far he could slouch under the table. "Don't know what you're talking about~"

"It's not nice to lie. What would your mom say- wait, he gets bigger?"

Ronan was about to ask how much bigger when suddenly the dragon in question reappeared, obviously in some sort of distress. Ronan was half out of his chair while they talked, and no one else moved, 'Jem having just come out of the kitchen with a bowl of oatmeal. The knock sent Eli scrambling to stand up.

"I'll get that!" Apparently Amaya knew exactly who was on the other side of the door, but like at the castle, Eli would rather be the one to deal with it. He wondered how long it'd take Kai to get down here...a question that was answered seconds later as a portal warped open in the middle of the living room. Kai rolled his eyes at the exasperated look Ronan gave him.

"I didn't feel like taking the stairs, sue me- We're not expecting anyone, are we?"

Amaya was ready for when that door opened. Maybe Eli being in the way would help.

As Eli opened the door, a partially armored, tall women looked down at him, with brown hair and a braid across the left side of her head. She had metal shoulder plating, a dull green shirt, and leather armor padding over earth tone pants and boots. Amaya was hoping she wasn’t going to notice her.

“Hi have you seen a purple ha-”

Nope she noticed.

“AMAYA!”

Amaya was gone in two seconds, making a gate in the floor large enough for her and Adion to sneak through. She shut it behind her, but the woman did not go in. She knew Amaya better than that.

The woman turned and saw Amaya already trying to bolt in the other direction, and took of after her. Knowing she wasn’t going to get anywhere too quickly, Amaya called out her lance, Adion grabbed it in his talons and took her up in the air a good fifteen feet. He stopped their in mid air as Amaya hung upside down, looking back at her pursuer.

“YOU GET DOWN HERE NOW!”

“No, I’m alright up here actually, but thanks for asking.” Amaya called down.

“You are in so much trouble, you don’t even leave a note about where you’re going and next time I ask ‘where’s Amaya’ I get 'she’s not even anywhere within the worlds’,” The woman was imitating some old man at that point. “and no one has any IDEA where the ONLY UNDERSEER IN OVERSEER’S KNOW HOW LONG IS?”

“I don’t think you understand what 'nomadic work’ means.” Amaya was calm, and if you didn’t know any better, was being just a bit sassy in tone.

“And now I find out there are other universes? I JUST GOT USED TO OTHER WORLDS AND NOW YOU HAVE TO DO THIS TO ME? AND DON’T GIVE ME YOUR SASS-”

“I’m not using any sass.”

“I HAD TO GO BEYOND NORMAL GATEKEEPER CAPABILITIES TO GET HERE AND CARMI IS WORN OUT-”

Amaya knew at this point, she wasn’t listening, and cast Silence on her while she got down. By 'got down’ was by plainly jumping off from her height and landing on her feet. Realizing she wasn’t making any sound, the woman glared at Amaya with a closed mouth until she dispelled the effect.

“That was rude.”

“Yelling was unnecessary.”

“You could have told me-"

“I didn’t know until we got here. Besides the rule is if you don’t hear from me in a week, something bad happened, that was the agreement.” Amaya stated firmly.

“Fine, I mean, if you just wanted to hang out with some other guy friends and-”

She better not.

“-not get your-”

She BETTER NOT.

“boyfriend jeal-”

At that second, the woman was sent upwards into the sky with such a forceful Vault spell, it was almost instantaneous. Adion just watched as a bright blue, triple tailed fox-like rabbit creature came from behind Amaya’s shoe. Amaya sighed loudly, and looked at the fluffy blue thing.

“Hi Carmi, how are you?”

“Fine, thank you.” The blue being answered in a voice that didn’t seem to match him. “Your party seems wildly confused behind you.”

Amaya almost forgot they were there and almost wished they weren’t. She took in a deep breath and addressed everyone calmly, by clearing her voice.

“I’m sorry for that on levels I can’t express right now in words.” Amaya started. “This–that, is Yanu, my private mentor and legal… not parent. This is her Guardian, Carmi, a Carbuncle Essence Beast-”

“Greetings.”

“I would also like to apologize for her disturbing the morning, and for any odd, outlandish and rude remarks she is no doubt going to mention in the future.”

Right, Yanu probably hit the peak of her height and was falling to the ground by now. Without looking, Amaya waved her hand in clockwise motion towards Yanu, who’s descent was immediately slowed with a float spell. Yanu glared at Amaya all the way down as she floated just past her head. Amaya returned the gaze with her 'This is the opposite of impressed’ look.

Okay, this was different. People didn't usually dress like that around here (that Eli was aware of) so suspicion that this was someone Amaya knew?

Well, if the question about the hair hadn't confirmed it, Amaya's rapid escape via portal or whatever it was did for sure. It took him several moments to realize the others had crowded up behind him in the doorway, and they were all staring at the exchange.

"Who the hell's that?"

Soren sounded as confused as they all probably felt, but Eli, Kai, and Ronan answered simultaneously.

"Teacher."

Hey, they were all apprenticed to Ray, they knew this stuff when they saw it. Eli especially, although he really wanted to crack up when the other woman was sent flying into the air. If he ever tried anything like that with his aunt, he probably wouldn't live to see morning. Oh sure, she'd apologize to his mom, but.

[clarascuro]

Clara Reads City of Bones Part 3: Hogwarts Institute for Witchcraft and Shadowhunting

The Plot Thus Far

When last we left off, our lovable cardboard cutout protagonist, Clary Fray, had been attacked by a demon called a Ravener and taken to a place called “The Institute”. After three days of recovery, she has an uncomfortable (for us) conversation with Isabelle Lightwood, where we learn that Isabelle is hot and that we, the audience, should hate her for that, and also that Jace Wayland lives with the Lightwood family because his parents are dead. We are meant to feel bad about this. We are meant to feel sorry for Jace, which is a bit of a tall order, considering that Jace Wayland is the worst person to ever smirk and shrug his way through a YA book. If I were trapped in an elevator with him I wouldn’t even wait five minutes to be rescued, I’d pry those doors open and just drop. Death is cruel but quality time with Jace Wayland is crueler. 

So Clary leaves the hospital wing and goes down a long hallway, lead by the sound of someone playing a piano. Last time I said that it was Alec (Isabelle’s brother) who played piano, and that it was his only character trait, but nope!! It’s actually my favorite boy Jace, that sack of human refuse! So I guess Alec has no personality, actually. Anyway, they have some “witty” “banter”, and then Alec takes her to the library to talk to the head of the Institute, Hodge Starkweather, and, yeah. I think it’s time to talk about the Harry Potter stuff. 

The Harry Potter Stuff

You know how E.L. James made minor changes to her crappy Twilight fanfic and then published it as 50 Shades of Gray? Well, as near as anyone can figure out, this is basically the same thing that Cassandra Clare did with her Harry Potter fanfic The Draco Trilogy. Just change the names, tweak the backstories ever so slightly, slap on a crappy cover and publish that sucker! It’s technically not plagiarism anymore! This is how you end up with stuff like "The Institute”, a secret school to teach young magic kids to control their powers, or Hodge Starkweather, elderly magic professor, who, one could argue, is a crackpot old fool teaching our protagonists magic tricks. (Gosh, how does Clare come up with this stuff?) 

This obviously isn’t proof of any kind, but when the villain of your story is named “Valentine” and he’s an evil magic user who has been dead for sixteen years (the age of our secretly magic protagonist) and the main characters are afraid to even say his name...yeah, it doesn’t exactly take a genius to figure out where all of this comes from. 

Now all this is frustrating, but it’s also hilarious. I mean, the big bad of the story is called Valentine. VALENTINE. And I actually laughed out loud for several minuted when I first read the name “Hodge Starkweather” to myself. I still get a little chuckle typing this. Oh, and since the word “muggle” would have JK Rowling’s lawyers on her ass faster than light, the word Cassandra Clare uses for non-magic people is...”Mundie”. It’s short for “mundane”. Like...first of all this is objectively hilarious. Second, mundane just means “normal”. If the Shadowhunter society is magical, then aren’t they they mundane ones? I know humans don’t have magic, but we still figured how to like, fly and stuff. That has to count for something. If I saw a dog that taught himself how to read, I wouldn’t like, make fun of him for not also being able to talk. I’d be like “Shit! That’s a pretty impressive fucking dog!” like what the fuck?

Anyway, this is all just a roundabout way to say that obviously this used to be a HP fic that through some twist of fate landed a publishing deal. And you know, it’s not as brain-meltingly bad as 50SoG, so who cares? Cassandra Clare’s just having fun, so who cares if her writing gets published? 

Well...

The Plagiarism

So, yeah, she plagiarized lot. Like a lot. The Draco Trilogy has lines of dialogue taken directly from shows like Red Dwarf, Black Adder, and Buffy the Vampire Slayer, as well as from Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett novels. Quoting shows apparently used to be pretty common in the early days of fanfiction, so there is context to consider here, but it gets worse. Cassandra Clare lifted almost a whole chapter, nearly word for word, from an out-of-print fantasy series called The Hidden Land, by Pamela Dean. On top of that, Clare was sued in 2016 by author Sherrilyn Kenyon, whose Darkhunter series predates Clares Shadowhunters series. (And for the record, Clare’s series was originally titled Darkhunters. Yikes.) You guys can read the full(ish) stories here and here.

I Guess I Have To Keep Talking About The Plot Now

Sigh. So after Hodge Starkweather (A+ naming there) tells them about Valentine, he explains that Shadowhunters are angel-human hybrids? Or something? They’re special, and they fight demons. Also faries, vampires, werewolves, all that stuff exists. We’re stuck with the Shadowhunters, however, because God has punished me for my hubris, and my work is never done. (Oh look, I just plagiarized Brian David Gibert. I’m a real author now, like Cassandra Clare!) The Shadowhunters were started thousands of years ago by a man named, I shit you not, Jonathan Shadowhunter. JONATHAN. FUCKING. SHADOWHUNTER. Why the fuck am I trying to come up with clever names for my characters? I should just name them all “Alex Clarasbook” and call it a fucking day. Fuck.

Anyway after a thrilling conversation with Alec-Who-Has-No-Personality, we find out that he does have a personality! His personality is that he hates humans. Oh, excuse me, “mundies.” Yep, that’s the best way to make a character relatable. Just make ‘em fucking racist. It’s okay though, it’s only magical racism so it evens out. Have I mentioned that this story has no poc?

(Oh also Clary’s mom was a Shadowhunter, but 1. I hate Clary                        and 2. literally a newborn baby could’ve figured that out, so)

Clary and Jace leave the Institute to go back to Clary’s house, and Clary slaps Jace, an act that brings me such joy that only the birth of my firstborn child will ever eclipse it, and even then, it will be it close tie. The moment is quickly over, however, as Clary immediately feels bad about it, because again, she is not a character. She’s a Walmart mannequin created for Jace to make out with. Then she sees two girls looking at Jace, and, in what can only be called the true essence of the book, “Clary turned instant traitor against her gender.” Just as a reminder, Clary sucks.

Anyway they get to her house, kill a giant, talk to a witch, yaddah yaddah yaddah. Basically nothing happens except the inevitable unraveling of my mental processes. I had to stop reading there because I have better things to do with my life besides destroying the few braincells I have left. I’ll post the next part soon, as soon as I can read more than five pages without wanting to fling the book off a seaside cliff into the frothing mist that obscures the swell and crash of the unforgiving waves. Until then, please enjoy some of my favorite bad lines.

Selected Passages (And Commentary)

“Jace chuckled. Clary could tell that he had come up behind her and was standing there with his hands in his pockets, grinning that infuriating grin of his.”                                                                                                             (She knew all that without looking?)

“Attacked. Clary wondered if this was a euphemism for ‘murdered’.”            (Clary you’re literally the dumbest person I’ve ever met.)

“Clary let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding in.”                  (This may just be me being petty, but I hate this cliche so much.)

“‘You may be the only guy my age I’ve ever met who knows what bergamot is, much less that it’s in Earl Grey tea.”                                                                   (Ah yes, that famous stereotype, that boys don’t know about tea. Oh, you like tea? Name three kinds. I hear sexist gatekeeping is a real problem in the tea community. I am not having a good time.)

“Dorothea chuckled. ‘It’s good to see a young woman eat her fill. In my day, girls were robust, strapping creatures, not twigs like they are nowadays.’ ‘Thanks,’ Clary said. She thought of Isabelle’s tiny waist and felt suddenly gigantic.”                                                                            (Cassandra Clare’s super feminist, guys. You can tell because she’s always pitting her female characters against each other.)

Rating So Far

3/10-Bad. Jonathan Shadowhunter gets an entire 10/10. I’m going to have my name legally changed to Jonathan Shadowhunter.

[rigginsstreet]

i already have a question was that jessica lucas playing an extra or just like... her twin lmfao

this whole game is so stupid i cant deal with this like we get it ras, you saw jumanji

the scene hasnt even started but alice already being pregnant is stupid. ras is stupid. alice is stupid. madchen is stupid cuz she ultimately led us here and i will never forgive her

also alice is an unreliable narrator and nothing she says is fact except for all the gay fredsythe shit. thats canon

why are we doing 80s when theyre in the 90s god..... i hate this show i had a whole soundtrack ready in my mind. it was mainly nirvana but ... its what fp wouldve wanted

alice had no friends gee... i wonder why...

IS THE WRITING THAT BAD OR IS IT CAMIS DELIVERY WHAT WAS THAT

lmfao fp blew alice off ok ya know.... im dying that they try so hard to set up flice as some epic romance meanwhile they could not give two shits about each other. obviously my boy was going around fucking every girl how else was he supposed to convince his dad he wasnt getting plowed by fred on the daily

alice and penelope.... gay. lesbians. gay lesbians. in love. always. OH COME ON YOU HAVE THE NERDY BITCHY CHICK WITH THE ASSHOLE FROM THE WRONG SIDE OF THE TRACKS ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? HELLO??? 

fp would bring up his arm being in a cast for literally no reason what does that have to do with streaking fp? hes always been a dumb bitch at least thats consistent

IM NEVER IN MY LIFE GETTING OVER FRED APPEARING OUT OF THIN FUCKING AIR TO A MEETING OF A SPORTS TEAM HES NOT EVEN FUCKING ON JUST TO RUN NAKED WITH FP ARE YOU..... WHAT..... GOD...

fred really just wanted to get detention with fp so they could have a date im cry

ras really loves his saved by the bell references huh

alice no one wants to hear your hoe stories unless theyre gay or with hal

is fp asleep with his hand over his face lmao ok thats my son

of all the time i spent talking about fp carving his initials all over the school... and they give it to alice.... fuck you. anyway riverdale high is littered with fj + fa in a heart thanks for coming to my tedtalk

tom and sierra did not date in high school. but also thats not tom so

penelope would love heathers ok.... thats my mom

and shes in love with sierra wow we stan

wow fred the gay just keeps jumping out

fred really went to look at fp before talking about how he wanted to stay in riverdale his whole life.... god he already had their wedding planned i know it

ok fred literally had no reaction to hermiones hand on his knee so... guess the feelings come later? or its bad acting idk 

oh... hmm.... so... was fred too living on elm street at this time? or is it just coincidence fps dream life takes place on the street fred will eventually settle down on.... we dont know..... either way... gay

also alice exposing fp? BUT YALL GONNA SAY THIS IS ROMANTIC OR TRAGIC OR WHATEVER BULLSHIT LIKE NAH SON. ITS JUST MEAN

yall + alice think her life wouldve been better if she married fp and had chic but like... even she herself is saying fps gonna end up a drunk like his dad so ???? next

ok so like.... on the one hand fp wanting to be the first jones to go to college makes me emotional but like .... forsythe senior being a serpent? makes no sense.... i mean... i guess? if we’re rewriting history. but uh.... literally last season fp said he joined after his dad threw him out but i guess that never happened now so whatever. but why as an adult would he want to go back to the serpents? i get desperate times blah blah but.... and then to lead the gang? idk.... and then to have your own son lead it? nah

so sierra been knew about the sisters and never did anything?? ok

ok i will say this level of stupid drama is right up there with 90s soaps so like... kudos to that lmfao

fred gave fp half his sandwich just like julia and i have been saying get... out... :’)

alice carved fp and freds initials next to each other lmfao even she knew! bitch!

fred draping himself over the desks is gay culture

i literally cannot handle all the subtle fredsythe happening in this episode ras really came for my whole fucking scalp

FP AND HERMIONE FUCKED IM SORRY I DONT MAKE THE RULES

penelopes so fucking gay... so fucking gay. good for her

fp and hermiones season 1 interactions are suddenly making so much sense they... were in love we just need to accept this and move on with our lives

hermione: so fp what went down between you and alice. fp: not me thats for sure!

fp putting on the crown and fred immediately going into a sword fight... so anyway they fucked!

they really trying to force this heterosexual nonsense down our throats like im sorry its too little too late fred and fp are gay i can never buy anything heterosexual interaction again. besides the ones i deem appropriate. i am the gatekeeper. 

WHO IS PENELOPE FIGHTING WITH THAT STANCE

why are they in the same outfits all the time ???

michael sounds so much like his dad but like just with maybe a deeper register. i love baby hiram hes the only son i claim. besides gay fredsythe. but the flice and fremione scenes are when theyre dead to me. ok i can forgive fremione. kinda

FREDHEADS DIDNT EXIST TIL SENIOR YEAR I WILL KEEP SHOUTING THIS FROM THE ROOFTOPS AND FRED AND FP WERE THE ONLY MEMBERS EXCEPT OCCASIONALLY TOM BUT IM HAPPY TO KNOW MY BOY FP WAS ON DRUMS THATS CUTE AS HELL

interesting how fp was supposed to tell alice freds dad died. fp had to console his boyfriend he didnt have time to call alice ok

penelope and alice, fred and fp, sierra and hermione sitting across from each other. these are riverdales endgames.

also i know fp was running his foot up freds leg soothingly under the table dont play with me. he couldnt do much more than that they were in public he had to comfort his boyfriend somehow

penelope essentially: WE TAKE THIS TO OUR GRAVE!

fp..... honey... no.... spit is not necessary

everybody wants to rule the world is a fucking bop tho so ill forgive them this

ok but fred HAD THE BAND SENIOR YEAR HELLO

hermione spent the whole episode talking about how she wanted hiram and now at the end she gets with him but doesnt want it? lies

FRED AND FP ARE ROMEO AND JULIET STOP TRYNA SAY EVERYONE ELSE IS. BITCH

also fp.... won them the state championship senior year so.... he... didnt give that up omfg i hate this

yall.... they did hal so dirty i cant believe. i mean... ugh whatever i dont care

but fred and hermione went on a date senior year.... ok

[iluvtv]

Still Watching: A Love Letter to my Mom

The content below has not been censored for your consideration as neither the Real Housewives nor my mother would have approved of such blasphemy.

The decline in blogging was conveniently intentional.

There were other projects.

My career as a TV critic wasn’t exactly gaining steam.

My readership technically wasn’t booming.

For a time there had been an unmistakable fulfillment in my blogging habits.

Full disclosure: this work held undeniable titillation, provoked as it were by the vain echoes of my own subconscious. It was too enticing not to indulge  the ego, booming, unselfconsciously through the page as I “eloquently” deciphered probable intentions of a writer’s room.

But was this self-aggrandizing, albeit surely intellectually stimulating task truly worthwhile?

I kept falling back on this tricky notion of time management. Was taking copious amounts of notes regarding my viewing habits (a laborious task which required endless rewinds and thusly an inability to watch TV with others) coupled with the studious investment of actually researching and writing a cohesive piece which included a clear argument for television as a medium and thereby proving a consistent thesis, truly a valuable use of my time?

Not to mention, of course, the added effort of finagling my mother to invest her energies toward a strong copy-edit.

It was an investment, sure. But then again none of it was necessarily difficult at least in the classical sense of the word.

Actually, the engaging my mother bit was sort of easy. Not only was I skilled at the subtle art of stroking of her ego; “Your attention to detail is just so much better than mine. You are so smart…” I also possessed a valuable trump card which, admittedly, brought as much pleasure as my own voice: she actually liked my writing!

To have known my mother is to know what a huge compliment this fan-dom truly was.

My mother was proudly authentic. She had no shame over her inability to “fake it”.

This personality trait demanded a certain dedication on her part. She was famous for telling my girlfriends they looked like sluts at our eighth-grade dance and embarrassing fits at the market while her younger children tried to disappear into the kid’s seat of the shopping cart. Patronizing eye rolls were par for the course. When a third grade Hebrew School teacher lauded my literary skills my loving, supportive mother made it abundantly clear she didn’t think I was a bad writer but maybe just too… precious?

Admittedly, poetry about attempted genocide from an eight-year-old may hold some tonal issues.

No matter, after 30 years of practice I had found my niche. I was everything she seemed to be looking for in a writer: I would rather drink turpentine than emote and I like really “got” satire. Finally, my words were funny and thusly, the woman who had helped foster this cynical humor had little trouble understanding my intentions.

We fell into lockstep. Her killer, critical eye and unparalleled editing skills were a welcomed privilege. I was no longer precious. A trait which carried over in my ability to “take a note.” I fully understood the value of a critical red pen from a grammar die-hard. Particularly one, who not only had a deep ceded appreciation for my style (she helped cultivate it, after all) but also a keen understanding of the objective, which only a mother could boast.

I was fully aware what a priceless service this was.

And so, I kept watching. My notetaking became obsessive. Whenever I pondered this expense of time, I considered the reality: rewriting dialogue was improving my own. I was becoming a better writer.

Since both my mother and I were committing countless hours to the free and underappreciated service of my viewing recommendations, it didn’t take long for the shows and topics I bothered dissecting to be unequivocally dictated by her unapologetic tastes. Or better stated, my own experience of such.

As an aside, I’d be remiss not to note that in losing both my parents it has become abundantly clear that one’s guardians (especially good ones) mostly exist in relation to ourselves and our already noted inflated egos.

Basically, the television I studied, the theories I pondered, the conclusions I drew had to appeal in large part to Dale Allen Boland. This was a nuanced role. An honest woman of remarkable talent she also happened to be the strict television gatekeeper of my childhood. Back in the 90’s a desire for this blue light pulsed through my veins like an addict in search of her next hit. I hadn’t been picky at all back then. This was a time in my life when even Jerry Springer reruns in black and white, streamed through bunny ears in my Jr. High weight room took the edge off.

To be frank, while at first her editing felt crucial so as not to embarrass myself on the interwebs it soon became clear that the bigger part of my ask was just any sort of consistent audience. In time it became obvious that my mother hadn’t only become a fan, but she was, in fact, my blog’s only fan.

And as any good writer knows, you gotta’ appeal to your base.

It helped, of course, that my mother had been my earliest educator (dictator) of media. The San Francisco Chronicle’s Datebook and the New Yorker were mainstays next to the can, meaning my earliest poos were made all the more pleasurable by the accompaniment of Adair Lara and John Carrol. By 34 I was not only well versed in what she found tolerable, but also possessed a keen understanding of how to stylize this appeal.

Simpsons? Yes. Danielle Steele? Not so much. Had she given Danielle an opportunity? Of course not! But I was willing to play her game.

We both were expending a lot of energies at this point and since any real readership was in the slim to none margins it was crucial that we at least reward ourselves.

In retrospect I understand that this was actually how we enjoyed time together.

After she died my father noted that my mother and I had always shared a very special intellectual connection. A greater compliment than sharing a literary bond with Dale had never been given. In fact, in my father’s wake it is easy to see that this final gift from him may have been the most important. In saying so, he finally acknowledged what I’d always longed to hear. He respected, perhaps even envied not only my intelligence, but my mother’s too.

While I had given up on blogging years before their deaths, my diligent notetaking continued up until them. I accepted that my time critiquing television for free to a marginal audience had not been without purpose (though I missed the motive of the maternal connection it fostered until just now). I am well aware that through my efforts I had gained the confidence to write a novel. I understood that to maintain this skill set a continued attention to television’s minutia was critical.

But then, she died. Suddenly, grief allowed me space to achieve an entirely different and antithetical goal I’d set years earlier and had made no real efforts to achieve: to do less.

Finally I was able to let thoughts wave over me. I allowed flashes of “brilliance” to be fleeting. I relaxed into a space of agitated ease. I exclusively sought joy. In doing so I concurrently and without coincidence leaned into a brand of watching which had always been considered “just desserts.”

Bravo TV became a life raft. I watched Real Housewives and Summerhouse with a certain amused stillness I hadn’t exhibited since my complacent years as a co-ed.

The day following my mother’s memorial I listened to “Radio Andy” on Siris XM in a monotonous loop throughout the entire 6-hour drive home. I slept to Bravo podcasts. I read tweets from Bravo fan accounts during session breaks.

I noticed Bravo was keeping me smiling. The network and commentary was rewarding me with a source to which I could focus. I appreciated the humor.

Two months later my father died. Mind blank I leaned in harder to the quiet blankness this watching served.

But then, I noticed something.

Watching Kathryn Dennis of Southern Charm open a coke can with her teeth in a loudly expensive living room, next to her foam roller it occurred to me that these women were the antithesis of my own mother.

Vicky Gunvalson whooping it up at a classy resort represented everything my mother had no tolerance for.

To see these women as satirical requires a certain level of empathy for their antics that would have eluded Dale.

Their bad behavior was just too black and white. For my mom there would have been nothing charmingly relatable about a woman like Lisa Barlow of Salt Lake City, placatingly sipping a constant stream of fountain soda through a plastic straw while proudly bragging she wasn’t “like a regular mom,” proving this factoid by feeding her children drive through fast-food for every meal and ignoring their calls when she was at a party.

These are women that bat fake eyelashes and scream at each other through plastic pumped lips. They float effortlessly in azul pools in Mexico boosted by the silicone in their tits.

My mom also wasn’t a regular mom but she wouldn’t have found this indulgent brand of opulence at all inspirational, aspirational or relatable. She did not identify as a “powerhouse” or a woman who needed to tell other women that she “lifted up other women” over an expensive cocktail brunch with “40 of her closest girlfriends” all of whom wielded designer purses like coats of armor.

This trope, repeated often throughout every Housewives franchise for the past 20 years would have just pissed my mother off.

It’s not that she didn’t relate to women behaving badly this just wasn’t her brand of bad behavior. She maybe could have sympathized if they’d been wearing Walmart rather than Prada.

Lorelai Gilmore? Sure, why not? Emily Gilmore? Definitely not.

It’s funny because in a certain sense my mother’s proud authenticity and lack of shame in her outbursts would have made her an ideal housewife. But the weight these women put on things and beauty would have been too damn distracting to her.  

In spite of being a woman whose love language was often a good screaming match she would have found any and all of the dramatic fights on Housewives absolutely insufferable.

And in spite of my deep love for the genre, convincing Dale that any of this was actually satire worth watching would have been an exercise in futility.

I embraced this factoid quietly and with little work on my end (other than setting the DVR to catch up on back seasons of Atlanta) I leaned into a space which never would have been tolerated.

It felt good.

It was my own.

In doing so, I came up with a million things about Bravo to share. Perhaps one day I will. God knows I need to create a new fan base.

But before I could even consider either changing the channel or sitting down to a blog analyzing how one housewife’s ludicrous and racist notion that eating chicken feet was somehow any different than eating chicken nuggets, I got this text from my mom’s best friend: “have you seen Derry Girls.”

Maybe an audience was asking for a resurrection, after all.

But as I flipped to Netflix and started a new note labeled “Derry Girls” it occurred to me that I first must come to terms with how much things have changed.

There is a certain level of self-actualization left amidst the cluttered grief of losing my parents. As I write this, I am continuously tempted to take a break for “Mom’s consideration”. Her feedback would have supplied an unrequited serotonin boost, like a gentle promise to my oh so evasive ego that there was purpose in my efforts, that the writing I was doing was valuable. When my mom was alive I always knew that someone would appreciate my continued efforts, making it tolerable to finish, and tidy, and publish. My mother was like a promise that not only my words but also I myself was worthwhile.

This chore of loving, maternal reassurance is, of course, now my own. A truth my mother, who never needed to brag about lifting up other women, would have celebrated.

Nothing would have made my mom happier than me making my own choices, editing my own words and being my own cheerleader Perhaps she died just to prove it. To know Dale Allen Boland is to suspend belief that she maybe could have made her last stubborn point through such dramatic means.

And to be totally frank; that is a storyline not even a housewife could pull off.

Thank you for being my greatest cheerleader. I love you Mom.

[blackuigryphonvr]

I wasn’t posting for a while for several reasons: I kept having a persistent problem w cyber stalkers, especially.

But I also got sick. No, I don’t have COVID19, but a slight bronchitis in my chest that’s hard to get rid of. I didn’t go to a clinic because I was scared of contracting the virus 🦠 there, and I have ample reasons not to trust the tests. My step father died of similar sounding symptoms to COVID19 but my mom claims he didn’t have it. I got my chest infection due to my own stupid fault and I know what I did. So I’m too compromised to go outside because if I got the real virus it would make me even more high risk because I have asthma. Also, a week ago my next door neighbor was severely ill, couldn’t breathe, and was taken away in an ambulance 🚑. She’s never returned and her newspapers pile up by her door next to mine. So, I was terrified to go into the hallway.

I did actually get my original legacy account back on Pokémon Go, but I was stupid n should’ve known better, n allowed someone I didn’t actually know use my Alt account in Boston whom blew through at least 8 of my passes with nothing to show for it.... maybe he/she took the Legendary Pokémon.... anyways, it got banned for 30 days.

I was mad, n I don’t talk to him/her. But I’d also gotten my legacy account back.

That’s when I made strategic efforts to go outside n play again.... including in the rain.... which is the reason I got infected because my mask 😷 got wet several miles from my home n I got stuck in a downpour....

But, about a week later, a gang of local players that hate me for some unknown reason must’ve abused the report feature because 1 moment I was catching Zubats n when I logged in a few hours later afternoon playing Wizards Unite my account was banned again....

So..... I have reason to believe who is doing it..... and why.

When I was down in Florida I got some regional Pokémon.... so, when I got my legacy account back, I was flexing them by placing them in the PokéGyms which I created. Yes. I made those locations into not only PokéStops, but PokéGyms. I couldn’t do that in March because that account was banned which was also another strange circumstance....

But as soon as that account got banned a 2nd time, very mysteriously, 2 days later I saw THIS:

So..... this says to me that the hatred focused on me has NOTHING TO DO WITH ACCUSATIONS that I’m spoofing.... because I wasn’t. I actually WENT to Florida and I got: Cordola, Carvine, and Maractus.... but u see.... Maractus is VERY RARE. Super RARE.... I got mine by chance like around Hollywood or Miami Florida because I WAS ACTUALLY THERE.

But..... we’re in the middle of a pandemic which really started getting in gear at the very end of my vacation in Florida. We left a whole day early. That account got banned on the drive home crossing the border of Florida into Georgia....

But, these guys were in the gyms daily.... and I KNOW who these players are.... they live HERE. And Rhode Island highways were shut down before Easter. So..... I was THE ONLY PLAYER in the entire area to have a Maractus. THE ONLY ONE.... so, if u were HERE the whole time.... how did BOTH of ur 2 accounts get regionals? And the other 3rd Account??? Those weren’t the regionals u could get in the summer bonus unlock event last year.

🤔 The way I see it, u n ur gang abused the report feature and bore false witness against me for doing something that violates TOS, THEN u put ur own Pokémon in my PokéGym to SHOW OFF! 🖕🏿Hypocrites.

Which not only means ur a spoofer.... but u don’t hate me for being an alleged spoofer BECAUSE U R ONE!

It means ur hateful sadists who ganged up on me. U smeared me. It’s a literal conspiracy n ur all in cahoots!

Well..... that’s not even the half of the story.

I also have cyber stalkers now, and people whom follow me when I’m out on the streets, including on foot, and in cars..... there’s a RED CAR 🚗 that’s the one I usually noticed. Duh!

Well..... now I have multiple Alt accounts which happens to most players that hit Level 40.

I’d honestly rather just stick to 1 Account.... but everyone locally has at least 2-5 Alt accounts on average because we all enjoy Raids together. I also actually spent money 💵 FOR REAL on my accounts, and I WOULDVE gone to the Philadelphia event this year if not for the pandemic.

I probably need to change the name of my legacy account AGAIN, because I already changed it to be BlackUniGryphon because I stopped being afraid to be me... but, now these terrorists have taken that away from me.

They’ve also attacked my kid’s social media.

Anyways, I’m really grateful to have qualified for the pandemic assistance unemployment because my iPhone 📱 broke. So, it helped me to replace that smartphone with a new one. I am SO HAPPY 😃 to have this new device.

I have also been playing a lot of Wizards Unite as well.

I’m not looking forward to changing my legacy account name at all. But, since I know I wasn’t spoofing and that account was just suddenly banned for another 30 days, it means more than a few players are literally out to get me.

I’d originally thought most of the problems came from 1 of the 3 teams, but now I KNOW it’s from 2 teams out of the 3. And THEY ARE ALL SPOOFERS!

I don’t report spoofers because they’re still a part of the community. Yes, they’re frustrating when ur a lower level new player.... and YES it’s cheating.... but they also helped lots of people with Raids last year. They’re not all bad people.

But to smear me as a bad person when I actually helped build this community, and helped contribute to the PokéStops n PokéGyms that wouldn’t have otherwise been there shows that some people are misogynists, sadists, and gatekeepers. 😡

Anyways, I did take screenshots of the stuff I was doing... so, I’ll probably be dumping that stuff soon. Especially my Wizards Unite stuff first.

[us2dinosaurplanet]

Ultimate Story 2: Dinosaur Planet-Chapter 8: Welcome Back, Ocean Princess

After releasing the spirit, Fox and Pikachu were immediately sent back to the Warpstone area in Thorntail Hollow. Warpstone: “Right there, Fox. It’s time for you and your friends to head down to the Seaside.” Misty: “The Seaside? You mean the…the…?” Warpstone: “The beach? Yes, that’s what I mean.” Misty: “Oh! It’s like a dream come true. Who knew that I would return to the ocean some day? I…I can’t believe that this is happening. I feel so special.” Warpstone: “Eh, what’s wrong with her?”Fox: “Well, let’s just say you don’t know how happy you’ve made her.” Kazooie: “Oh, great, there she goes, talking ocean again. Just when I was about to enjoy another month without her doing this.” Fox: “Oh, shut up, birdbrain. You only heard her talk ocean once this journey and meanwhile, how many times have you annoyed us with your squawking? Besides, I feel sort of glad to hear her talking ocean again.” Bubbles: “Me, too!” Warpstone: “Well, get going. Just standing there and dreaming about it isn’t going to there faster, you know.” Misty: “You’re right! Let’s go!” Warpstone: “But before you leave, I have something for you.”        

He then took out another scarab bag. Warpstone: “Here you go. Ready for you when you needed it.”Misty: “Great, can we leave now?” Warpstone: “Yes! Go, now! And be sure to check the post signs for directions.”

And so, Fox and his friends left the Warpstone area. Tricky: “What did you guys mean when Misty was “talking ocean”?” Fox: “Oh, it’s just a little something we made up whenever Misty starts talking about the ocean a lot.” Kazooie: “Yeah. It was mostly an insult.” Fox: ” Kazooie!” Kazooie: “What? I’m only telling the truth.” Fox: “Kazooie, just…just shut up, OK? I don’t want to hear another word out of you.” Kazooie: “Jerk!”

After hearing the Thorntails and Shabunga, the Thorntail store owner, talk about a beautiful beach area being controlled by the Sharpclaws called Cape Claw, they finally had a chance to see this beach for themselves. With the help of the post sign and Peppy’s world map, they know exactly where to go.

They headed through a gateway behind the Arwing, through a tunnel and around a fence to a long path with a gold scarab at the end in front of a gate. It asked them to feed it 60 scarabs to enter the maze to Cape Claw. Fox fed it the scarabs and the gate behind it opened up and they went in. At the end of the maze is a well that lead them through an underground tunnel to Cape Claw. Phew! It’s about time they made it.          

As they entered, Fox ran ahead of his friends, until he saw them. That’s right, the beautiful beaches of Cape Claw. He was amazed from the sight. Fox: “Wow! It’s beautiful. Oh, Misty’s going to love it.”

He ran back to his friends. Fox: “Misty! Misty, you won’t believe this. We’re here.” Misty: “We…we are?” Fox: “Yeah, we are. Come on.” Misty: “OK, I’m coming.”

Then, hand and hand, Fox and Misty walked down the path together until Misty was able to see the beautiful beaches herself. She was surprised and speechless. She didn’t smile, but she wasn’t sad or angry; just surprised. She looked at Fox, who was smiling, but she didn’t make a face at him, or any for that matter. When she turned her head and flew up in the air, Fox’s smile began to fade. When the others caught up with him, he grew worried. Fox: “She…she didn’t smile. What happened? Was it something that I did?” Bubbles: “I believe you did…absolutely nothing wrong.” Peach: “I thought what you did was very sweet, leading her here.” Fox: “I hope she thought the same thing, as well.”

Peach activated her PPG suit. Peach: “Well, there’s only 1 way to find out.”

Bubbles and Peach flew in to the air while Fox, Banjo and Rayman ran down to the closest beach to them to catch up with the girls. As they approach the beach, they saw Misty kneeling in front of the water and staring down at her reflection on the water. Then, she saw Fox’s reflection right next to hers. When she looked up, she saw Fox kneeling right next to her and smiled at her just like in her reflection. When she looked back down at the water, Fox’s smile faded again. Fox: “Misty…” Misty: “Fox, can you believe it? After a long period of time, I’m finally near the ocean again.” Fox: “So, what’s wrong? Aren’t you satisfied?” Misty: “Yes, I’m very satisfied.”

She smiled at him. Misty: “Thank you, Fox. This means so much to me.” Fox: “No problem, Misty. I’ll always do things like this for you.”

Fox and Misty smiled at each other. Fox: “So, are you going to do that transformation thing that you’ve always wanted to do?” Misty: ” Oh, Fox. I thought you’d never ask.”

And now the moment that you have been waiting for. As she got up, she floated off the floor and stood above the water. With her mystic water-powers combined with the water, itself, she was able to use these powers to transform herself into her princess form. When she fell into the water after finishing her transformation, every one of her friends started celebrating, except Fox, who was folding his arms and smiling. Fox: “Welcome back, Ocean princess.”

They both smiled at each other. Tricky: “Wow!” Misty, Fox: “Huh?” Tricky: “That was cool! How did she do that? Can she do it again?” Fox: “Tri-Tricky! Were…were you watching the whole thing?”Tricky: “Of course I have. That was the coolest thing I’ve ever seen! What is she? How long have you been hiding this from me? Can you tell me, Fox?” Fox: “Well, not exactly. It’s all pretty complicated to explain. It’s a long story. However, there’s 1 thing about this secret that’s easy to talk about. For instance, remember when with were with your mom and Misty jumped to the ceiling when she said that word that caused her to do that?” Tricky: “You mean, “pirates”?” Misty: “AHHHH! PIRATES! WHERE, WHERE!” Fox: “Misty, it’s OK. Another false alarm.’’ Misty: “Phew. Thank the stars.” Tricky: “But why does she get all jumpy when any of us say that word?” Fox: “Well, it’s because of this form. She freaks out all too easily upon even hearing the word.” Misty: “I’m sorry, Fox. I try real hard, but just can’t control myself whenever I hear anyone saying that.” Fox: “Well, it’s OK, Misty. It’s not all your fault. Not many people know your greatest fears.” Tricky: “So this form is why she’s afraid of who-know-what?” Fox: “Exactly.” Tricky: “Oh. So, what is she?” Fox: “She is the legendary princess of the sea and this is her true form.” Tricky: “You mean she’s actually a mermaid?”

Fox nodded. Tricky: “Wow! She’s beautiful.”

Misty tickled Tricky underneath his chin. Misty: “And you’re cute.”

Tricky flipped to his back and Misty rubbed his tummy. Suddenly, they heard a cry of a dinosaur at the distance. Fox: “Whoa, what was that?” Tricky: “It’s a Hightop. I wonder what’s going on?” Fox: “I don’t know, but we’ll never find out if we just stand here. Let’s go!”

They immediately ran to the boardwalk that is surrounding the Hightop to see what was going on. When they asked the Hightop, it said that it buried its gold somewhere on the beaches when it heard that the Sharpclaws were invading Cape Claw, but forgot where they were buried. He then told them that if they retrieve all of his gold, then he would help them on their quest. They all decided to help, but Fox told them to stay out of this one because he wanted Misty to work with him.

It may have taken them a long time to find the gold, but with the help of one of Misty’s special underwater abilities, the underwater drill, they were able to find them and return them to the Hightop. The Hightop then stomped the ground, causing a nearby cave to open up. The Hightop told them about the Sharpclaws doing something suspicious within that cave and asked them to go in there and find out what exactly it was, so they did.

Fox ran to the cave as fast as he could. Inside was a staff switch, he pulled the staff and opened a cage at a beach that’s closer to him. He jumped down from the ledge and met the others near the cage. Suddenly, a Cloudrunner wearing a golden crown on its head and a blue shirt came out. Tricky was immediately startled. Tricky: “Whoa! A Cloudrunner!”

He stepped behind Fox, Kazooie became dazzled at the sight of the Cloudrunner. Kazooie: “Wooooooow…!”  Tricky: “Shoo! Go away, Cloudrunner! Get away!” Bubbles: “(Giggle) Have you 2 met?”Cloudrunner: “He is an Earthwalker. I am a Cloudrunner. Our tribes do not see each other eye to eye.”Peach: “But why?” Cloudrunner: “His father has probably said bad things about me. That why.” Peach: “Oh. So, who are you?” Cloudrunner: “I am the Queen of the Cloudrunner tribe and the gatekeeper of the Cloudrunner Fortress. Scales has used my powers to reach the fortress and then afterwards, he locked me in that cage.”

Kazooie then flew out of Banjo’s backpack and landed in front of the queen. The Queen seemed somewhat startled to see her. Queen Cloudrunner: “Um…hello…who are you?” Kazooie: “Hi. I’m Kazooie. You’re pretty.” Queen Cloudrunner: “Er, what is with your friend here?” Banjo: “It seems to me like Kazooie has found her own kind on this planet.” Queen Cloudrunner: “Uh, I see. Anyway, I must return to the fortress and stop Scales.” Kazooie: “Can we come with you?” Queen Cloudrunner: “You want to come with me?” Misty: “Of course, we do.”

Misty dunked herself underwater, brought forth a bright flash of light from below the surface and then came out in her human form. Misty: “We’re going to need the Spellstone there.” Queen Cloudrunner: “Well…All right.” Fox: “Great! Thanks, Misty.” Tricky: “Oh, no. There’s no way I’m not going to her fortress.” Fox: “Well, OK, it looks like you’re sitting this one out, Tricky. We’ll head back to Thorntail Hollow and you can wait there for us to return.”

Tricky nodded. Kazooie: “I’m liking this more and more.”

The queen flew up towards the sky.  Queen Cloudrunner: “I’ll meet you guys at the fortress. Good luck!”

As she flew into the sky, she opened the gateway to the Cloudrunner Fortress and flew right in.Kazooie: “Hey! Wait for me!”

Kazooie flew after the queen. Banjo: “HEY! KAZOOIE, WAIT! WHO’S GOING TO FLY ME UP TO THE FORTRESS?”

Rayman walked up to Banjo and placed his hand on his shoulder. Banjo looked at him. Rayman: [“Don’t worry, Banjo. I’ll fly you to the fortress.”] Banjo: “You will? Aw, thanks, Rayman. You’re a real friend. Unlike some people!!!” Fox: “OK guys, let’s…Huh?”

Just then he spotted Misty and Bubbles and noticed that they were about to cry. Fox: “Oh, no, you 2 aren’t going to mope because Tricky’s not coming with us. Are you?”

They both nodded. Fox: “Aw, girls. I don’t want to leave Tricky here either but, we really don’t have a choice. He doesn’t want to come with us and we can’t make him.” Bubbles: “But…we love Tricky.” Fox: “I know, I know, hm…oh! I have an idea.”

Fox took Pikachu off of his shoulder and held her in front of him. Bubbles quickly snatched Pikachu out of Fox’s grip. Fox: “How’s this: you girls can have Pikachu for this part of the mission. OK?”

Both Misty and Bubbles became greatly ecstatic. Misty, Bubbles: “OK!”

Pikachu seemed very happy to be held by Bubbles. Fox: “OK, guys. Let’s go.”

And so, Fox and his friends returned to Thorntail Hollow where they all got ready to take off and fly towards the Cloudrunner Fortress.