#I'VE BEEN LOSING MY MIND OVER THEM FOR THE PAST TWO HOURS

[muzarry]

HUNTLOWS!!! THE HAND ON HER WAIST!!!

THE HAND ON HER WAIST!!!

THEY'RE SOOOO 🥺🥺🥺

[lanadelnegan]

My Girl

S7!Negan x Reader

Requested from anon: hey! loving the blog and every story you post! i was wondering if you’d do a story of a reader’s first time being with S7 Negan who is an asshole at first but then goes soft because he accidentally made her cry??

OOOH I'm gonna have some FUN with this one. And thank you so much <3.

Summary: Rick's oldest daughter, y/n, loses her virginity to Negan.

Warnings: NSFW, 18+, smut, virgin first time, vaginal sex, daddy-kink, age-gap (reader is 18, negan is 40), Rick walks in on Negan eating you out.. (twice), degrading language, mushy romantic Negan, Negan fucks you in nothing but his leather jacket

A/N: This is my favorite fic I have written by far and I hope you love it as much as I do cuz I am obsessed.

"Carl, take your sisters upstairs and don't come down until I say it's safe." I lift Judith out of her high chair and follow Carl up the stairs.

Our dad has always treated us like Carl's the older one, even though he's two years younger than me, but I don't mind. If anything, it takes some of the pressure off of being big sis all the time.

I hear Negan's voice booming in the distance as my dad opens the door to head back outside. This has become part of our weekly routine at this point. Negan and his men went from monthly visits to weekly visits over the past couple months, but I don't mind that either.

The more I get to see him, the merrier.

I move the bedroom curtains slightly, peeking through my window until my eyes find Negan standing in the street in front of our house. I'm able to make out what they're saying if I listen closely enough.

"Rickyyy, I missed ya. Where's that sweet daughter of yours hiding? .....The older one of course." I can't stop the grin that appears on my face when he asks about me.

"This isn't about her. Get what you need, and leave." My dad stands firmly planted with his hands on his hips and my eyes roll at his attitude. Maybe if my dad would just be civil with Negan all of this could stop. I revert my gaze back to Negan.

"Now, Prick, you know I can't leave without seeing my girl."

His girl... The butterflies in my stomach flutter at the sound of that.

"Why are you so obsessed with him?" Carl asks rudely from across the room while holding Judith and bouncing her so she doesn't cry.

I quickly glare at Carl before turning my gaze back towards the window. When I look back down, Negan is looking up at me, a knowing smirk playing at his lips. I can't look away, and he lets his gaze linger a little too long as well, prompting my dad to look at my window. I quickly drop the curtain and back away.

"Take Judith to her room and put her down for her nap." I instruct Carl. He stares at me suspiciously. "Go! What did I just say?" I snap impatiently. He shakes his head but ultimately leaves.

"You're always so weird when he comes around." He says under his breath. I close my door behind them and go back to the window, peeking again, but this time everyone's gone. I rush to go see what's going on, but as soon as I swing my door open and run out, I crash into a tall, solid figure. My eyes widen as I look up at the man in the leather jacket.

"Hey, doll. Miss me?"

"Uh - I - where's my dad?" I stutter nervously, peaking around him.

"Busy getting supplies for me. He'll be busy for the next hour, so I thought I'd come keep you company."

Negan's been visiting Alexandria for months now, and each time he comes, our talks get longer and flirtier. Well, he flirts with me and I pretend to be annoyed, mostly so others don't think I like him. If they only knew how much I think about his beard between my legs.

There's something about him that intrigues me.. fascinates me even. I'm ashamed to admit I've even touched myself a couple times - okay, a lot of times - to the thought of him.

When I don't respond, he backs us into my bedroom, shutting the door behind him.

He slides his shoes and jacket off, sitting on my bed and leaning back with his feet propped up. I blush at the sight of him in my bed and restrain myself from ripping my clothes off here and now. A chill runs through my body, making me noticeably shake but I try to play it off. He probably things I'm scared, when in reality I just want him.

"Relax, I'd never hurt you darlin'. Unless you want me to." He winks as he leans back against the headboard getting more comfortable.

"I know." And I do... for some reason, I know he wouldn't hurt me.

He bites his bottom lip playfully and raises his eyebrows while patting the bed next to him.

I nervously walk over and sit down before leaning back, mimicking his position. My bed is a twin, so it doesn't allow much room to ourselves. My shoulder is pressed against his and the simple act has my body on fire already. I glance over and let my eyes roam up his white t-shirt to his handsome face. He watches me with amusement while his leg presses against mine teasingly.

"Sweetheart, I've been around the block long enough to know when a girl wants my dick. And I can practically hear that pussy fucking purring every time I come near you." He grins at me like he knows all my secrets.

My face burns with embarrassment at his words.

"I bet I could make you blush even harder than that, doll." His grin stretches wider but I stay silent, letting him do the talking.

"Of course.. I wouldn't do anything you're not comfortable wi-"

Before he can finish, I press my lips to his hard and climb on top of him. His mouth parts, letting my tongue in and his subtle moan makes my pussy flutter. He tastes like whiskey and smells like leather and I feel high off the taste of him as we kiss passionately. I grind my hips desperately into him and feel his bulge grow underneath me.

"Negan... I need you."

"I know baby." He breathes out.

My hands fumble with his belt and pants until I get them undone. He watches me as I pull out his cock and my pussy is already sore from just looking at it. No way it's gonna fit.

"How do you want it, baby? You gonna be a big girl and ride daddy?" His hands squeeze my ass underneath my dress and he practically growls when he realizes I'm not wearing panties.

"It's like you knew I was coming. Such a bad little girl." His fingers tease my opening and I'm embarrassed that I'm already pathetically soaked for him.

"All for me?" He slides a finger through my slit and brings it up to his mouth for a taste. "So fucking sweet."

I slide myself against his cock that's now slippery with my wetness and wonder how I'm gonna fit that thing inside me.

The big dick energy definitely checks out.

I hover above him naively, thinking I can actually take him. The tip just barely pushes through my opening and I moan at the sudden pressure. His hands grip my ass, guiding me down over him.

"Come on baby, that's it." He praises me as I keep sliding down. I stop when I can't take anymore, realizing I have at least four more inches to go.

"Oh, I know my little slut can take more than that."

I shake my head. "Negan, I don't think I -"

"You can, and you will, doll. I didn't come all the way here for you to only take half of my dick."

Tears fill my eyes as I try to sit all the way on him, wanting to make him proud. I make it another inch before the pain is too much. Not only with how deep he is, but he's so wide I think he may actually be ripping me apart.

"Deeper, y/n." He demands.

When I try again and fail, I quickly climb off of him frustrated. "I can't Negan, I'm trying!" He sits up in the bed, his feet on the floor now.

"Bend over."

"W-what?"

"Do not make me ask again." His jaw clenches as he stares at me seriously.

I lay myself over him, my ass facing upwards on his lap.

"You're going to take all of me, baby. If my wives at home can take me, I expect nothing less from you."

He doesn't even give me a warning before bringing his hand down painfully on my ass making me yelp. He chuckles darkly before smacking me again. He rubs the sensitive spot before teasing both of my holes.. One with his thumb and the other with his middle finger.

"What would daddy say if he could see you right now? Bent over my fucking lap and dripping for me like a little whore..." He pushes his thumb and finger deep inside each of my openings and I bite my lip hard at the pain.

I know he's trying to be all dominant right now.. I'm not oblivious to how rough sex works, but my eyes still sting with tears at his crude words. I shouldn't have built my hopes up that Negan could actually care and be gentle with me.

I sniffle as the tears fall, trying to wipe the snot dripping from my nose.

He quickly pulls me up and his eyes are filled with concern.

"Baby? Hey, look at me." He cups my face gently as I sit on the bed next to him.

"I - I liked you." I choke out. "I was the only one here who actually cared about you and saw you as a person.. and you.. you just see me as a stupid object you can shove your dick in.... You just ruined my first experience with a man. I hope you're happy." I sob while looks like someone just punched him in the gut.

"Fuck, sweetheart." He presses his forehead to mine, looking down with regret. "I didn't know you were all mushy about me and shit.. Truth is?" He tilts my chin to look at him. "I was being so harsh with you cause I didn't want to admit my own feelings. I didn't think you'd ever want an asshole like me, so I didn't want to go catching feelings for someone who didn't want me back. But baby? I can't get you outta my fucking head... Why do you think I started visiting every week?"

My teary eyes look up at him and he looks genuine. I want to trust him so badly, but my heart and head are saying two different things.

"Fuck, y/n. I know you don't believe me. Let me prove it to you. What can I do? Just say the fucking word."

"Stop taking our stuff... Leave our people alone..."

He chuckles lightly, shaking his head like he can't believe what he's about to agree to. "Does that include you?"

I try to hide my grin as I wipe my tears with the back of my hand. "....No."

"Then it's a deal, baby."

"That's it? Just like that?" I look at him confused.

He shrugs. "Guess you've got me wrapped around your finger already, darlin...And now that I know you've never been with a man, I'm taking my fucking time with you." He lays me down on the bed while kissing and climbing over me.

"What about my dad? He'll be back soon."

"Simon's keeping watch, doll."

His lips travel to my neck. "....What about your other wives? You're just gonna fuck me and go back to them?"

He laughs against my neck. "Sweetheart.. I kicked every one of them to the curb the day I layed eyes on you."

My mouth drops open but he cuts me off by pulling my dress down over my chest and taking a nipple into his mouth. I moan and arch myself into him. After a few moments of sucking each one, he slides down further, lifting my dress to my waist and settling his head between my legs. I watch him in awe as he takes his time, kissing my inner thighs.

"Has anyone ever eaten you, baby?"

I shake my head no as I lean up on my elbows to watch him.

"Good." He spreads my pussy lips apart with his fingers and I blush at him staring at it. "Such a pretty pussy. Fuck." He says before locking eyes with me and pressing a kiss to my clit gently. I moan from the contact and arch myself into him, silently begging for more.

He dips his tongue in me and curls it up, gathering my juices. His eyes roll to the back of his head and he groans and licks all the way up to my clit before sucking on it softly. My mouth drops open and my hips try to jerk away, being overwhelmed by sensitivity.

He smiles against me. "Not going anywhere until you cum all over my face, doll." He wraps his arms up around my thighs, pressing my stomach down with his hands.

My breathing matches the speed of his licking and sucking and I feel the pressure building up inside me.

"Fuck, Negan!" My eyes are clenched shut but snap open when my door suddenly flies open.

"Shit! Dad!" I reach to throw my blanket over me, but defeatedly realize it's on the floor. My eyes widen in horror at my father standing in the doorway, looking like he just saw a ghost. A ghost that's eating his daughter's pussy. I'm unable to close my legs because Negan is still holding me down with his hands.

"God fucking dammit, Rick. We were just ge-"

"Negan!" I cut him off, my cheeks turning bright red with embarrassment.

He kisses my pussy one more time and my eyes widen, not believing he just did that in front of my father. He finally leans up, wiping the corner of his mouth with his thumb and smirking at my dad like he's proud of himself.

I quickly get up and fix my dress.

"Dad, look, I -" I look up, stopping at the sight of Carl pointing a gun directly at Negan's head.

Negan tucks himself back into his jeans, buckling his belt and ignoring Carl.

"Carl.." I slowly step in front of Negan. "Put the gun down."

"You - you wanted this? Him?" My dad asks horrified. "He's done horrible things, y/n."

"And you haven't?!" I yell at my dad. "I watched you rip a man's neck open with your goddamn teeth. If he's a monster.. then so are you."

Negan steps beside me and laces his fingers through mine before kissing the side of my head.

"I love him, dad." I look up at Negan and elbow him roughly when I see a teasing smirk on his face.

"And you think he loves you? You can't be that stupid." My dad says, putting emphasis on the last word.

Negan chuckles and finally cuts in. "First of all, Dick, do not call my woman stupid. Secondly.." His faces grows serious. "We won't be taking anymore of your things. No more visits. Other than me paying this one a visit of course." Negan winks and puts his his arm around me protectively. "That is.. until she moves in with me." Our eyes all widen at the same time.

"You want me to live with you?" I turn to Negan.

"I mean, you did just confess your love for me, doll. Soo, yeah, that's the plan." He kisses my forehead.

"Y/n, we'll talk about this later. Negan, you need to leave. Now." My dad demands, his jaw ticking with anger.

Negan glares at my dad for a moment before turning to me, lifting my chin to kiss him slowly and passionately. Before he lets go, he whispers in my ear. "Meet me right outside the walls when it gets dark. I am nowhere near done with you, baby."

My heart flutters at the thought of us sneaking out together.

Negan walks towards the door before leaning close to my dad's ear. "I get to be her first, Rick. How fucking sweet is that." I struggle to make out his words but don't miss the chuckle at the end. He pats Carl's shoulder on his way out. "See ya 'round, bro."

"Love you, sweetheart!" He calls out to me as my dad and brother follow behind him, making sure he leaves.

I shut my door and smile giddily, running to the window and peeking out. Negan is already looking up at the window when I look at him. He smirks and winks at me before heading off to the gates.

A few hours later:

The sun just went down and my palms are starting to sweat as I pace back and forth on the outskirts of the gates. A million thoughts race through my head.

What if he doesn't come..

What if it's a trap..

What if he lied about everything he said..

Oh my god.. He's gonna kidnap and torture me..

Shut up. He wouldn't do that.

This is a bad idea. What am I doing.

Just as I turn to run back inside the walls, I see him appear from the shadows, wearing his signature leather jacket with a black t-shirt underneath.

"Were you about to ditch me, y/n?" He asks playfully as he pulls my wrist towards him and crashes his lips into mine. When the kiss deepens, he bends a little, pulling me up by the back of my thighs and wrapping my legs around his waist. We make out like horny teenagers while my fingers run through his slick black hair.

"You ready to officially be mine, doll?"

I nod without hesitation. "Yes. I'm already yours, Negan. I don't care what anyone thinks about us."

He kisses me again, setting me back down on the ground. "Lead the way, baby." He nods towards the side gates.

"You want to go back to my house? What if someone sees you?!"

"Kinda hope they do.. I like the thought of everyone knowing who you belong to." He smirks and it makes me knees weak.

"Okay.. come on." I pull his hand as I guide him back to my house. We sneak through the back sliding doors as carefully as possible before tiptoeing up the stairs.

He lightly smacks my ass as we're going up and I turn to shush him, tripping over my own feet in the process. He catches me before I make a loud thud on the stairs and his body is leaned over mine as we try not to laugh.

My body shakes as I laugh silently and bring my hand over my mouth quickly to stop any sound that comes out. His eyebrows raise at me with warning as if I better not make a noise.

"Okay, okay. Shushhh." I whisper before beginning our climb up the stairs again. My dad's room is at the end of the hall and mine is adjacent next to his. We try not to let the floors creak as we get closer to my room. We slip inside and I ease the door shut gently. When it finally clicks shut. I let go of a deep breath and look up at Negan. As soon as our eyes lock, we laugh like idiots, but quiet idiots.

He walks towards me. "Goddamn it, I fucking love you." He says as he lifts me back into his arms kissing me.

"You know.. earlier outside.." I breathe out between our kisses. "I thought.. that maybe you were gonna kidnap and torture me."

He smiles against my mouth as our lips lazily fight each other. "...What if I am?"

I stop kissing him to look at him. When I do, his look turns serious and it scares me for a moment. "I fully plan on making you mine and torturing you with this dick forever, doll."

I grin and roll my eyes as he continues holding me in his arms. "I guess there are worse ways to get tortured."

"Wait until I'm all the way inside you." His eyebrows raise teasingly.

I press my forehead to his and bring my hands to cup his face, kissing him again. I can't take my lips off of him. "Well what are you waiting for?"

That's all he needs to hear before he's walking me towards the bed and laying me down gently. He stands back up, removing his jacket and shirt.

I watch him closely, admiring the flex of his biceps when he moves. "Put the jacket back on. No shirt."

He laughs until he sees that I'm serious.

"Yes ma'am." He says with his little country accent. It's not always noticeable, but when it is.. it's so fucking adorable.

Once he's back in the jacket and bare chested, he stops for a moment before removing his pants. "Can I take these off, at least?"

"No, I want to."

He grin stretches as he walks towards the bed, keeping his hands by his sides. "All yours, baby."

I sit up in the bed in front of him and undo his button and zipper. I shuffle his pants down just a little before pulling his hardening cock out of his boxers. It turns to a steel rod in my hand and I don't care that I'm full on staring at it, assessing each vein and how it turns an ombre shade of pink towards the tip.

"I hope you like what you see, baby. Cause it's the only dick you're gonna be seeing for the rest of your life."

"I'm perfectly happy with that." I look up at him before kissing the tip of him, just like he did to my clit earlier. He watches me proudly, letting his fingers run through my hair lovingly.

I lick my lips before struggling to fit my mouth around him. He chuckles down at me.

“If you can’t fit me in that cunt, what makes you think you can take it down your throat, baby?”

I grin around him and I slide my mouth deeper and deeper. Surprisingly I don’t gag and I think it surprises him too.

Guess I don’t have a gag reflex. That’s good to know.

“Holyyy shit, doll. Look. At. You.” His voice is so deep it vibrates to my pussy. The tip hits the very back on my throat and even further until my eyes water.

I try to jerk my head back, but Negan pushes my head down on him again, my nose pressed into his pubic hair. He waits a few seconds until I feel like I’m going to pass out from lack of oxygen before pulling my head back. I gasp for air and he pulls me all the way off of him while kicking his pants and boxers off.

"Trying to make me blow my load before we even get to the good part, darlin'? He climbs over me in the bed, kissing me softly.

My hands slip underneath his jacket and rub his back, scratching at it gently.

"I am gonna make you feel So fucking good." He says before kissing my neck. "You want me to be gentle with you baby?" His voice right in my ear makes me shiver.

I nod and he hovers his face above mine so we’re staring into each other eyes.

“You ready, baby?” He whispers and I nod again.

He leans up on his knees between me and lines himself up with my entrance before pushing the tip through. “Tell me if you need me to stop.”

He slowly slides in me further and further as he holds my legs open.

“Goddamn this pussy is so fucking Tight.” He pulls back a little before pushing in deeper and my mouth gapes open slightly.

He chuckles and stares down at me through heavy eyelids. "I'm not even halfway yet, sweetheart. You want more?"

I nod desperately as my eyes fill with tears at the overwhelming sensation of him so deep inside me.

"Take it then, doll. Grind on me and make yourself feel good." He stops moving completely while still on his knees between my legs.

My cheeks blush at his request and he smirks down at me, sliding his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket, refusing to move or touch me.

I lean up on my elbows while he's still inside me and push my body further into him, taking every inch I possibly can. I grind myself against him until I find just the right spot for the tip of his cock to press into and drop my head back at how good it feels, not caring about the desperate sounds I let out.

"Oh my god, Negan.. fuck." My face reddens at the intense pleasure as I continue using his cock to pleasure myself.

"Fuck, baby. Now THIS? Is a Fucking sight.. Watching you get off on my cock like a desperate little whore."

"Touch me, Negan. Please."

"Please what?"

"Please Negan."

He removes his hands from his jacket to lean over me, holding himself above me with one hand on the bed while bringing the other to lightly grip my throat.

His dark hazel eyes dart back and forth between mine as he squeezes his fingers gently around my neck. My face reddens even more at the sudden loss of air.

"Try again, doll."

"Please... daddy." I choke out and he quickly releases my throat.

"Good girl." He kisses my lips softly before thrusting his hips hard, completely filling me until his balls are flush against me.

I scream out and his hand immediately covers my mouth while his head dips to the side of mine and his deep voice fills my ear once again.

"Sshhh, baby. I know. I know." He pulls out almost completely before sliding in again, this time softer but just as deep.

My eyes fill with tears at the pain but I don't want him to stop. My fingers grip the bottom of his jacket as he continues fucking me hard and at a steady pace. The headboard begins to lightly bump the wall above me and my eyes widen with panic.

"Negan, the bed. My dad's room is right on the other side."

He chuckles lightly in my ear but doesn't speak. Instead, he pounds into me even harder and faster with his head is buried into my neck.

"Negan!" I whisper yell at him but it feels too good to make him stop. The closer my orgasm gets, the less I care about my dad hearing us.

After a few more thrusts, he slows down and suddenly flips us over with his dick still inside me until I'm laying over him.

"Negan, my dad's gonna come in here! We have to be quie-"

Before I finish, he lifts his knees up and rams his cock into me hard. It feels even deeper from this angle and hits a spot that makes me see stars.

"Come here, baby." He maneuvers me until my arms are wrapped around him and my head is nestled into his neck. He smells like musky cologne and sweat and I can't help but lick him. Our mouths are next to each others ears, breathing and moaning heavily as he begins to thrust up into me faster than ever. The headboard slams into the wall with force but I don't even care.

This feeling is unlike anything I've ever felt or knew was possible, so the last thing I'm gonna do is tell him to stop.

"Negan.." I cry out. "Faster."

He obeys and wraps his arms around me tighter, fucking me at an animalistic pace. I cum so hard and fast I don't even have time to announce it. My pussy clenches and I feel myself suddenly leak around him, soaking his dick and probably even the bed below us.

"Goddamn. That's my good fucking girl... You gonna let daddy cum in this pussy, baby?"

"Yes! Please." I whine.

He growls in my ear and holds himself deep and still inside me as his dick pulses over and over.

I try to slide off of him when he's finished, but he holds me tight, not letting me leave.

"Negan, you need to leave before my dad-"

"He's not here, sweetheart."

"What?!" I snap my eyes to his.

"Relax, baby. He's fine. But I did warn him that if he didn't want to hear his baby girl screaming "daddy" all night.. then he should take your siblings and go stay the night with Daryl." He grins up at me and my brows come together with confusion.

"Wait you.. you told him about our plan?"

"Of course baby. Had to be respectful and ask for your old man's blessing."

"And.. and he gave it to you?!"

Negan laughs and reaches up to tuck my hair behind my ear. "Absolutely not. But respectfully, I told him he didn't have a choice."

The next morning:

My vagina is screaming at me for allowing it to be destroyed last night. I can't count on one hand how many times Negan made me cum. I open my eyes to the sun shining through my window and immediately notice Negan is gone. I shoot up and look around, seeing that his clothes are also gone.

What if he just.. got what he wanted and left..

I throw the covers off of me and get up, grabbing my sundress of the floor and throwing it on before making my way through the house.

"Carl?!.... Dad?!" I yell as I descend quickly down the stairs. I stop at the bottom to find Negan stirring a pot of something on the stove.

"There she is! Mornin' sunshine." I walk over to Negan to see what he's cooking and he holds a spoon up to my mouth, letting me taste the deliciousness. This man can fuck and cook... what a god.

"Was wonderin when you were gonna wake the hell up. It's already lunch time, baby." He presses his lips to mine and I notice his freshly shaven face. I've never seen him like his and he looks so incredibly handsome.

He lifts me up and sets me on the kitchen counter while standing between my legs.

"Mmm, promise me you'll wear little sundresses with no panties underneath for the rest of our lives, doll." He says as he kisses me sweetly. I giggle and wrap my arms around him, kissing his neck.

"You hungry baby?" He asks and I nod sleepily.

"Me too." He slowly gets down on his knees in front of me, draping my legs over his shoulders.

He softly licks me with his tongue, moaning from the taste before burying his face further into me until I feel his tongue push past my hole. His shaven face feels soft and much more gentle than his beard.

My fingers run through his black hair, tugging on it gently as my head falls back.

"Mmm, daddy." I moan and my eyes snap open, hearing movement at the front door. I quickly jerk Negan up while pulling my dress down and sliding off the counter, seeing my dad, Carl, and Daryl standing in the doorway. Carl quickly covers Judith's eyes while he holds her and Negan sighs annoyedly at the sight of them.

"God..DAMN it, Rick. Again? You gotta learn to fucking knock."

"It's my house." My dad's expression is unreadable as he stands there, eyeing Negan. "You said one night. You can be on your way now."

"Well now don't be fucking rude, Prick. Have a seat." He grins widely at my dad before gesturing to the table. "I made spaghetti."

The End.

[blueysobssesions]

HSR MEN VOICE LINES ABOUT YOU

Characters: Dan Heng, Sampo, Mr.Welt, Gepard, Argenti

Dan Heng

"I don't mind you asking about my relationship with Y/N, but it's complicated. You see, I care deeply for them. I've never felt this way about anyone before. But my past keeps coming back to haunt me. It's like a dark cloud hanging over my head, and I don't want to put Y/N in danger because of it."

"I've tried to push Y/N away, to protect them from the dangers my past presents. But every time I do, it feels like I'm tearing apart a part of myself. I know it's selfish, but I can't help but want to be with them. Even at the risk of putting them in harm's way, I can't bring myself to let them go." "Sometimes I feel like it would be better for them if they left me. But there's a part of me that desperately wants to keep them around."

Sampo

“She’s something special, that’s for sure..” “When I first met her, I was just doing my usual routine and scamming some people. And then I ran into her and…oh boy.” “From the very first time I started talking to her…I instantly knew she was different. No one else in the Overworld or the Underground caught my attention like she did…” “I spent more and more time with her and I got to know her more and more. And I just..I don’t know how to explain it. There was something about her that just drew me in. I don’t know if it was her personality or if it was just the way she was so effortlessly charming, but I just started feeling this weird feeling in my chest every time I would be around her..”

Welt Yang

"It's... hard to describe our relationship. We didn't start as anything. We bonded, we grew, and we slowly fell in love over time."

"It sounds cliche, but we just... feel at home when we're with each other. That's the simplest way to describe it."

"What's so special about her?"

"There's lots of special things about her. I could talk for hours if I wanted to, but I'll summarize it in two main traits: She is kind to a fault, even towards those who do her wrong.

She's very, very stubborn."

Gepard

"Ah... where do I start..... well we've been a relationship for a while now, we enjoy doing lot's of stuff together, such as eating, walking around the city, sometimes I take her to train a bit, but she really doesn't have a talent for it, I take her to dates from time to time...." "I love her.... very much...." "I.... there are so many things I like about her. She's very kind, she's funny, has a nice sense of humor, she very attractive-" "She's perfect... for me... I can't really imagine my life without her....."

Argenti

"I have a deep affection for y/n. I admire their strength and determination, and their beauty makes my heart race." "W-well, whenever I look at them, it's as if time around me stops, all I can focus on is them. Whenever I hear their voice, my heart leaps, I feel like I'm going to lose my mind... a-and whenever they touch me, my skin tingles..." "It's as if... my whole world revolves around them..."

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MASTERLIST!!!!!!!!!!

[waldau-archived]

hii! I've noticed that you haven't written anything for minghao yet (according to your master list) so I wanted to request something cozy and homey with him. like maybe cooking together or waking up together or something along those lines.. :)

hello anon! i was feeling extra sappy with minghao and this also happens to be my first work for him. thank you so much for requesting it, i hope you see this!

gender neutral reader. warnings: none.

muse — xu minghao | 1,382 words | fluff

minghao blinks his eyes open to the sound of silence. there’s not much he can hear right out, except for the distant sound of cars going past. he lazes around for a few more moments before giving in and checking the time on his phone.

it’s just shy of six in the morning. he needs to be up and at the studio by nine, but he doesn’t feel like moving just yet. he puts his phone away and turns around to you, to watch you sleep.

the first time he’d ever done it was unfortunately a time you weren’t actually asleep, and he’d ended up staring at you for ten minutes before you woke up and apologized to him, saying that you couldn’t pretend to stay asleep without wanting to burst into laughter.

he still remembers how embarrassed he’d been by that, and how you made it up to him with kisses and multiples reassurances that it had been okay, that he could do it again, that it wasn’t a problem at all, you’d just been caught off-guard the very first time.

the thing is — minghao adores you. he’s in awe of you. to him, no one else on this planet even compares to how exquisite you are. he loves how like-minded the two of you are, how affectionate you’re with him, and how much you support him without even saying any words. of course, he loves going out on dates with you, seeing new places with you, seeing you match the outfits he wears, but this might just be his favourite sight in the world.

this being seeing you asleep on your side, facing him, a hand tucked under your head and the other holding his own. as an artist, he’s used to noticing the finer details about everything he sees, so when it comes to you, he could lose himself for hours noticing every single thing about you that makes him love you more.

minghao gently untangles his hand from your grasp, drawing his own blanket over you properly so that you don’t feel cold. he immediately feels the cold winter air hit his bare arms, and he winces as he gets used to it. he’s going to need to workout before he leaves, because there’s no time for it in the evening. not if he wants to finish work fast enough to come back to have dinner with you.

his fingers itch for a brush. it’s been a while since he’s painted something. the last thing he’d put on his canvas had been a rendition of a sunrise he’d been able to see with you a few weeks ago. it had been magical; the beautiful hues of orange and yellow blending with the shimmering brightness of the sea, contrasting the pale hue of the sky.

but nothing looked more beautiful than you sitting next to him, watching the sun rise and letting the water wash over your legs. he’d been tempted to paint you instead, right there, but you’d dragged him out on a monday morning for inspiration, despite the fact that both of you had work soon, and he wasn’t going to let it go to waste.

but he doesn’t really need inspiration. not when you’re his muse.

he runs his fingers across your face as gently as he can, glad that you’re still asleep. you’ve been having trouble sleeping recently, and he’s glad he’s part of why you’ve been sleeping better. he smiles when he notices two faint pillow creases stamped into your cheek, angry red lines that he hopes don’t hurt you at all. you somehow manage to look even more perfect with them.

he doesn’t know how long he’s been staring at you before your eyes blink open slowly, and somehow his eyes are the first thing that yours find. he holds his breath, waiting for you to speak.

“hao?” you ask, voice croaky. “what time is it?”

minghao checks his phone again. “six thirty-seven. you still have twenty three more minutes to sleep, if you want.”

“mm,” you say, before you roll in closer and pull his arm to yourself. “wake me up at seven, then.” before he can say anything, you look up at him. “aren’t you supposed to leave early today?”

he nods. “do you want me to leave?”

you huff and tug at his arm to pull him closer to yourself, and he goes down willingly. “you know that’s not what i meant.”

“what did you mean, then?” he asks, pinching your nose softly.

you’re used to his teasing by now, so you just roll your eyes throw an arm around his waist. “did you sleep well, hao?”

“really well. you?”

“me too. but…how long were you staring at me this time?”

he feigns shock. “you could tell?”

“i can just…feel it, somehow,” you giggle. “won’t you tell me?”

“do you really want me to?”

“of course,” you say, eyes shining despite the layer of sleep clinging to them. minghao wishes he could spend more time with you like this. it’s almost like you’re forcing yourself to stay awake despite having some more time to sleep, just to talk to him. the thought warms his chest.

“maybe forty minutes? maybe more.”

there’s a grin on your face. “correct me if i’m wrong, but…i think you love me?”

he could just refute it, tease you a little, joke that you’re in too deep, but he can’t. there’s something about the early hours of the morning combined with the fact that he has the honour to wake up with you that makes his heart heavy. he’s lucky to even have this, especially with you.

“you’re right,” he says, voice rough, feeling his waterline sting suddenly. “i love you.”

the grin on your face disappears slowly. “hao? is everything okay?”

“of course it is, darling,” he says, bending down to kiss your forehead, brushing off some rogue strands of hair to kiss it properly, tucking it behind your ear so he can see your beautiful face better. “i love you. is that wrong?”

“no, silly,” you say, leaning up to cup his cheek in your palm. your hand is cold. maybe he should’ve warmed you up better. “you sound…sad. like there’s something eating at you.”

he closes his eyes and indulges himself in your touch, trying to work out his words, marvelling at how easily you can read him. “i…love you. you know that, right?”

“yeah. i love you, too. but…?”

“but,” he sighs, “i just…don’t have the right words to tell you how much i love you. i could say i love you a thousand times, but it wouldn’t be enough. i could kiss you a thousand times and it wouldn’t be enough. i could…i could ask you to marry me but nothing would be enough to tell you how thankful i am that you’re here with me. that you’re mine.”

silence, just the two of you in your bedroom, the sounds of life filtering in from outside the window.

your breath is shaky when you speak. “hao.” you drop your hand down to his arm. “i love you, too. you don’t…i don’t need any grand gestures from you. just…be with me. every single day. be mine forever. that’s it.”

“there’s nowhere else i want to be.”

“then that’s all i need.”

minghao presses a kiss to your head. he hopes it conveys everything he’s feeling right now. he’s about to say something more when your alarm goes off, and he really should get going if he doesn’t want to reach work late.

“see you in the evening?” you ask, hand catching his as he attempts to get to his feet. “maybe we can talk about…getting married? for real?”

minghao hasn’t even opened the curtains yet, and he feels like he’s standing in front of the sun again. he’s going to go to work, do well, come back home to you and hold you and hear about your day and eat with you. he’s going to surprise you with a painting of yourself, and he’s going to marry you. that’s the life he’s built for himself with you, and he loves it.

it’s all he needs to keep going, every single day.

“i can’t wait. i’ll be back before you know it, darling.”

taglist: @bookyeom @wootify @strnsvt @cloudycaramel @thepoopdokyeomtouched @minnieminshi @nonononranghaee @hrts4hanniehae @viewvuu @bewoyewo

[lani-heart]

|| series masterlist || next // previously ||

genre(s) -> angst, fluff, non-idol, hybrid au, poly au paring(s) -> yeowoosan x reader warning(s) -> mentions of abuse words -> 1.1K

I’ve never considered owning hybrids. 

I've always thought that they deserved to be free, and treated like people. Unfortunately in this state of politics it won't happen anytime soon.

Even then, the three hybrids who now live with me, almost seem like they wouldn’t operate on their own.

San… my pretty panther.

He's always been bad at leaving the apartment. When he does, he wears headphones. One's specialized for hybrids to cancel out noise. He can’t handle crowded places, sounds of screams happiness, or fear, or simple everyday noises like bells. You never notice how common it is until you have a hybrid flinch and grip you so hard it causes skin and clothes to rip. 

He’s exotic… and pretty but so so damaged. 

He’s never wanted to sit down and talk to me about what it was like nor do I ever expect him to. He wants to forget… he’s cried out how he wishes he could forget.

If only I could grant that wish to him. On his month anniversary, – when it was only me and Wooyoung by his side – he asked if we could go to the park. 

He loves watching TV. He also finds the sappy movies where you go to scenic places and just… soak it in. San couldn’t do that. That day a kid approached us and asked to touch San, but he wasn’t good with touch either. He flinches… so Wooyoung distracted the kid after they pull San’s tail. Innocent curiosity… kids don’t understand what no means when they are so young. 

After that day he locked himself in his room. 

He hates the outside world. Filled with cruel people and reminders of his past. 

It's a miracle he trusts me as much as he does. I once wanted to take him to a restaurant… but the door had a bell chime. It made him freeze until I commanded him and we went home. 

He will wait for a command and it's necessary to snap him out of it. 

Kun wanted him to continue therapy but he’s still not used to it. Shortly maybe? Whether that's in a year or two or maybe never. 

Despite how damaged he is, he’s truly an amazing person. He’s sensitive and caring… he’s beautiful. 

He cares so much about me, about Wooyoung, even the newest addition of Yeosang.

He always makes sure I'm not overworking with my book when I lose track of the hours. Whilst he makes sure to reassure Wooyoung with praises and sweet nothings everyday. Even Yeosang, he helps him with his traumas… assures him that he has them and that he isn't alone. 

Sannie, my first hybrid and I'd do everything to have him in my life – to be in his heart all over again.

“May this be the first life of many I live with you, you’re my reason to continue living”

Wooyoung… a sweet hyperactive fox.

He could go on for hours and hours doing any activity as long as he was having fun or with any three of us who joined him. 

He isn’t good at leaving the apartment either.

As much as he denies it he's still scared of me abandoning him one day. So when he does go out with me he's always glued to my side. Holding my hand or simply looping our arms.

He also feels the need to “make himself useful” since his previous owners had him do chores and cook for them since they were expecting a baby and were busy. 

His stress also gets him which is obvious because of how clingy he becomes and even picks at his own fur. His mind was constantly working and overthinking and I had to get used to praising him and reassuring him how much I loved him. 

It wasn’t hard but it hurt to know he needed constant reassurance to understand he’s loved by not only me but also to make sure he isn't a burden to San or Yeosang. 

He has a very bad mental health… one which will make him experience very long or even very short depressive episodes. 

In those days I spend most of my time in his room trying to offer him comfort. Sometimes we stay in silence or we’ll talk about nothing important for hours until we sleep in each other's arms. 

I owed Wooyoung a lot… he was there for me when I was in school and when my parents weren’t necessarily present in my life. He was there… he was always there and it's the least I could do for him. 

I’d be by his side for as long as he wants me. 

“I’ve loved you like it was love at first sight! My dream became a reality and I'm not ready to ever wake up”

Yeosang… my protective doberman.

I always found it interesting how my friends thought that San was the most protective and even though he is, San was a sweetheart. While Yeosang was intimidating. He hates the socialite life… in return doesn’t trust my friends. He also hates leaving the apartment, claiming it's his safe haven and always with his silly little nickname… angel. 

Claiming that's what I was… someone who saved him from his life in hell. Brought him back up, made him smile, and forgave him for his sins. He hates being reminded of his past… it's known that I had him and people will sometimes send me emails and texts to ask him for photoshoots. 

He, however, wanted to live a life of peace away from the media and the sins that others committed. 

He hates the attention, the photos, the videos, the whispers, and the gossip when he does come out with me. He’s a dog hybrid… he has good sight, good hearing… and good smell. He could tell when they gossiped about his prostitution background and even said horrid things. Not like he’d ever tell me what they said since… he didn’t want to make me sad or angry. He endured a lot… but he didn’t have to do it alone anymore. She was gone… and she’s never had a chance to get close to him again. 

If he saw me as his guardian angel, I’d act like it. I’d protect him with my life. 

“Why would I ever leave when I’m in paradise? Out there is hell, in here I have an angel looking over me” 

@wonuangel @danirael @angelsaway @krissroo @minkysmilk @mayonnaise-on-toast @robertsbbygirl @superbbananananana @hyukssunflower @kitty4hwa @justconniez @senpai-of-doom @kibs-and-bits @caityelise99 @ilovekinny @ateezennie23 @wooahaelemons @purplelady85 @watamotee33@chidess97 @littlelostdemonofthelight @maliamaiden @burntarm1n @spooo00oky @eastleighsblog @momo-peachy @kitstar1117 @quartzpirate @sunnyhokyu @iwishiwasrichasfuck @theginger543210 @pandolinka @ddaeing @kpopnightingale @slid3er @kekdo-520 @puppyminnnie @sparklinghwa222 @calicanbeevil @itsvxlentine @atinism @loumin908 @smally97 @rxnexxi @acetruepunk @majesticbeluga @namjooncrabs @tashizxy @itstheghostofmypast @smilefordongil @teeziny @totallynotlyntv @kyeos4ng @prodsh00ky @acescavern

please don't be a silent reader !! reblog, comment, and like <3

[angelxd-3303]

*jump scares you with lore art for my poppy playtime au*

I've been a fan of Poppy Playtime for awhile now, and it's kinda been my most recent hyperfixation.

In this au, the player is a former employee of playtime Co. named Patrick Desmond. He worked in the Game Station, caring for the children as they arrived. About a year into his employment, Patrick met a teacher from the Playcare named Lilith. The pair started working more closely after Patrick was promoted to a position in her school, started dating, and got married two years after meeting. (A healthy hetero couple???Nani??)

Some time later, a boy named Daniel Harvey came into the factory. He was orphaned at five years old, and was taken in by Playtime Co. He was meant to become a test subject; they intended to use him to create DogDay, but he was one of the lucky few to escape when Patrick and Lilith adopted him at 7.

Lilith sadly wound up losing her job at Playtime Co., when Miss Delight was created. She was heartbroken at leaving her students, but made the most of it by focusing on her adopted son, and her new life as a mother.

Patrick stayed at Playtime Co. for another four years. As time passed, he became more suspicious. Why did kids keep disappearing? Why was no one answering any questions? Everything came to a head when a child he was watching dropped her Mommy Longlegs toy, and Patrick was mortified to see blood spilling from between the plastic.

Following that incident, Patrick began scrutinizing Playtime Co. more closely. In a risky move, he snuck into his manager's office to investigate. He wound up finding papers describing the requirements for experiment test subjects. With that, he realized that all the rumors he'd heard over the years were true, that this childcare program was nothing more than a way for the company to gather subjects for their sick experiments.

Patrick made up his mind; he put in his two weeks notice. His boss wasn't happy, but Patrick was determined to muscle through the last weeks and leave this pit of a factory.

Now, as is canon, he called in sick on August 8th, 1995. The Hour of Joy. Daniel brought a cold home from school, and Patrick caught it. The next day, despite still being ill, Patrick tried to go to work. When he saw a flood of cop cars outside the factory, Patrick figured they'd been exposed for their crimes, turned tail and went straight home.

The police asked questions, of course, but since Lilith hadn't been there for years and Patrick had missed work that day, they had little reason to ask much of them. They still cooperated insofar as they could.

Ten years went by, and though Patrick had gotten a new job at a grocery store, Playtime Co. was always on his mind. The couple agreed that Danny was the only good that came from the situation, but Patrick could never shake the guilt. He had no idea what happened in the factory, or why he never saw any former employees around. Still, the guilt of leaving when there was clearly something going on lingered.

So when he received a vintage Poppy Playtime advertisement and a messily written plea to return, Patrick hardly thought twice.

Daniel, 17 now, had grown up with a loving but guilt ridden Patrick as his dad. He didn't know what exactly went down in the factory, but had memories of Playcare and the way he and the other kids were treated. He knew his dad felt guilty about leaving the factory, so when Patrick ran off without warning Danny knew exactly where he went.

Danny would be damned if he let his Dad go trudge through the painful memories of the past alone, so he went in after Patrick, facing what could have been his fate in his quest to find his father.

Lilith has her own demons regarding that factory, so she always held her husband back from returning. Her worst nightmare came to fruition when both her husband and son charged headlong right into the belly of the beast. Not willing to stand by while her family went down the drain, Lilith put aside her fear of Playtime Co. and went in after them.

So we have a man riddled with survivors guilt, a boy facing what his fate was meant to be, and a woman who knows more than she lets on...

Mayyybe a fic upcoming?? I'm still working on my Mario one, I promise. I've just hit a creative roadblock, so I'm gonna try to redirect to a different project and revisit it later to see if the flow returns. Sorry to keep you waiting!🙏

Let the games begin.

[selfindulgentpixies]

Soothing words and decaf

Satoru Gojo x Reader x Suguru Geto one shot

When nightmares wake you up once again your boyfriends decide they can't just leave you to sit up alone. Gn!reader, reader wears glasses and has bad eyesight, not stated where in the timeline this is. It's an AU where Suguru never left though. This is really just to comfort myself because my nightmares have been bad lately and making sleep super difficult. It why i've been slow on writing stuff because i'm tired a lot. Also i couldn't decide on just one of them for this comfort fic and needed to be doted on by both. Pls excuse any typos or mistakes

You wake with a start, a stuttering in your chest and a choked gasp. You gaze blearily up at the ceiling, your current location slowly invades your senses and pushes away the personal hell your subconscious  had been creating for you. There’s warm breath fanning over the crown of your head. It would probably be ruffling your bangs if not for the fact they were plastered to your forehead by the sweat. You glance to your right and see that at some point in his sleep Satoru had decided you were his personal teddy bear. Your eyes then drift to the left and you jolt slightly to find that Suguru is blinking back at you with a combination of tiredness and concern. 

“Another one?” He asks, voice low and thick with sleep. This had unfortunately become routine.

You go to speak and nothing comes out the first try but upon clearing your throat slightly and trying again you let out a small. “Yeah.. Go back to sleep, Sugu.” 

He huffs a little at your words and how you begin to try and wiggle out of Satoru’s arms without waking him. An impossible task given that all three of you weren’t what anyone could call heavy sleepers. Trauma will do that afterall. So it’s unsurprising when Satoru grumbles and tightens his grip on you. “You should take your own advice.” Satoru’s voice is just as gravely as Suguru’s and when you glance up you see him peering down at you with his impossibly bright eyes. 

“You know I can’t do that… Let me up and the two of you can get some sleep.” You scoot up to a sitting position, Satoru's arms wrapped around your waist making your task of reaching over him to the side table to get your glasses a far harder task than it needed to be. You whine and flop on him. Fine you’d just be blind. You wiggle down and under his arm, surprised he allowed you to do so as you slide to the end of the bed to get up. 

You didn’t feel like giving Satoru a chance to change his mind about letting you go so you don’t walk past him to get your glasses and instead just pad your way into the kitchen. Your shared apartment with the two men was so familiar you could probably navigate it wearing Satoru’s blindfold. 

Once you’re close enough to the microwave to make out the little glowing numbers you let out a huff. It wasn’t even five am yet. You’d maybe managed to get four hours of sleep which was becoming painfully typical. Today would be another day of surviving off coffee and hopefully slipping in a nap as soon as you got a chance. Your nightmares seemed to happen less when you slept during the day. 

You’re shuffling around the cupboards getting down what you need to make coffee when you hear quiet foot falls, perhaps near silent for someone else but your ears were sensitive and seemingly more so when you chose to mostly forgo being able to see. Anything beyond a couple feet away from you losing all clarity and blurring around the edges. Impressions of objects you only recognized based on familiarity.

Well mostly. “That’s the sea salt, love.” Suguru whispers against the shell of your ear as he takes the long cylindrical container from your hand to place back on the shelf and then grabs a very similar but not identical container that houses the sugar. 

You grumble. “Why do we even keep them next to eachother on the shelf?” Suguru’s hair tickling your neck makes you twitch slightly but you don’t brush it or him away as he leans over you, enveloping you in his warmth, resting his chin on your head as he bends at the waist and wraps his arms around your middle.

“Normally you’re wearing your glasses and can tell the difference.” there’s the smallest hint of amusement to his voice. 

You sigh. That was true. It annoys you but it’s true. You rock back on your heels and lean into his chest. “Really you should get more sleep. Go cuddle with Satoru, I’m sure he’s lonely trying to sleep alon-”

A loud yawn cuts through the kitchen as Satoru walks in. “Too late, already here.” 

“Seriously you both should-” 

“If we should be sleeping so should you. So either you come back to bed with us, or we’re all starting our day at this ungodly hour.” You feel Suguru’s jaw moving against the top of your head as he talks. 

You frown deeply, slouching in his hold. “I… can’t sleep okay? If i go back to sleep it’ll probably just start again.” 

Suguru hums and rocks the both of you back and forth. “Then it sounds like we’re all getting up then, right Satoru? “ He turns you both so you’re facing Satoru who’s much closer now.

Another yawn. “Sounds about right.” And as he says this he places your glasses on your face, bringing his own into focus for you. Satoru is beautiful as always but definitely looks like he needs more sleep. But you know very well how stubborn both he and Suguru are, they’re worse than you are. 

You cave. “Fine, stay up if you want then.” You wanted to sound petulant but instead you just sound tired. Suguru Squeezes you before rising to his full height and releasing you. “Go relax, I’ll make the coffee.” 

Before you can respond he gives you a small nudge in Satoru’s direction who doesn’t give you time to protest as he scoops you up and carries you toward the plush living room couch. He flops both of you down before rolling you so he’s squishing you into the plush fabric. “Satoruuuu-” You try to protest as he nuzzles into your neck. If you were more awake you might have caught on to what the two men were doing since in the kitchen Suguru put away the regular coffee and switched it out for decaf before brewing it. They still had some hope of lulling you back to sleep and caffeine wasn’t part of that. They knew you well enough that you likely just needed to be soothed and given time to get out of your head so you could be directed back to bed. 

“Mmm don’t want to cuddle me?” He pouts at you.

“You’re squishing me, you big menace!” 

The two of you go back and forth, you sinking back into the couch and giving Satoru his way despite complaining when what feels like suddenly Suguru is there holding two mugs of coffee and judging by the heap of whipcream on the third mug a cup of hot chocolate for Satoru. He kicks one of Satoru’s legs. “Move over and quit crushing them. “ 

Satoru grunts and starts to complain until he looks At Suguru and spots the mug topped with whipcream. He sits up quickly, suddenly looking angelic which earns a sigh from both you and the long haired man. You sit up and give Suguru a grateful smile as he passes you one of the steaming mugs. “Thank you, Sugu.” 

“Of course.” He leans forward and brushes his lips over your forehead. He gets you to scoot over slightly and as you often do you find yourself squished between the two men. You didn’t need to be squished, the couch was big enough, Satoru just seemed dead set on not moving further than he had to. 

You don’t really talk as you quietly sip at your coffee, instead listening to Satoru and Suguru talk about the upcoming day, voices low and soothing. You hardly notice when your mug is pulled from your hands and placed on the coffee table before you can spill the remnants of your drink on your lap. You blink rapidly realizing you’ve been completely zoned out only now to have Satoru’s face directly in yours. It’s brief because the next thing you know he’s picked you up for the second time that night, or rather morning. “Satoru-” You cut off in a yawn and wrap your arms around his shoulders, body shaking slightly with a stretch. 

“I think it’s time we head back to bed. Suguru and I have been talking to you and you haven’t even noticed,” he says amusement clear in his voice. You can hear Suguru in the background putting your mugs in the sink before following the two of you.

“Mm sorry,” you mumble against his shoulder, your glasses being pushed askew though you couldn’t care less. You feel more than hear Satoru laugh. And it feels like in the next blink he’s laying you back in bed, and gently slipping your glasses off before crawling in after you, wrapping you in his arms. It’s only a couple moments later that Suguru follows. A rough warm hand sliding under your sleep shirt to splay over your stomach. 

You’re finally back asleep then, safely tucked between the two of them where no harm can come to you, even if your dreams make you feel otherwise. The two of them will always be there to remind you that you’re safe.

@nanamikentoseyebags @strawberrystepmom @icy-spicy

@gojoest

[remlionheart]

* ˚ ✦ MDNI ✦ ˚ *

Marinade

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ when i first decided that i wanted to write some yuuji angst, i had a v vague idea in my head of what it might look like, but when i tell you that this fic took me for a ride, i mean it. angel boy yuuji itadori finds himself mourning his 22nd birthday rather than celebrating it. sitting alone at a bar, overwhelmed by grief when he's suddenly greeted by the one part of his past that doesn't hurt to look at. 4.9k words. hurt/comfort, angst, smut, fluff, slice of life, shonen, literally everything and anything going on here. i was crying and smiling and rooting for these characters and i'm not sure that i'll ever emotionally recover from writing this, but i'm really happy w the outcome so lemme know whatcha think, luv you ♡ (also shoutout to my girl @bratbby333 for always being my biggest hype-woman and proofreading for me when i've looked at a fic for too long and start to hate it) *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ

now playing: marinade by dope lemon

Yuuji hadn't seen you since middle school.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

He remembered you as the girl who had pretty handwriting and a serious affinity for the color blue. The girl who would leave pastel origami hearts on his desk without ever saying why. The girl who'd hide away in the library during lunch instead of eating with the rest of the class. The girl who he'd watch on the bus ride home with a sinking feeling in his stomach, catching the way your eyes glossed over each time the driver stopped in front of your house.

He learned how much you loved to read and write that year. Glancing at you from across the study hall room, secretly jotting down what number was printed along the spine of your book so that he could get you the next one in the series. He'd leave it on your desk before class started, the same way you did with his origami hearts. Never saying a word about it.

He watched you fill countless journals, your face always so concentrated as you poured your thoughts into them. He’d stop by the shopping plaza near his house after school every time he noticed that you’d reached the last page, spending his allowance to make sure there was a new one waiting for you the next morning. Each one he gave you, a different shade of blue.

But it wasn’t until the last day of eighth grade that he finally mustered up the courage to break the not-so-silent-silence the two of you had been sharing for the last 6 months. He sat down next to you, introducing himself even though it went without saying. His eyebrows furrowed a bit when you wordlessly slipped out an earbud and handed it to him. A rare, but visible smile tugging at the corner of your mouth. He held it in his palm for a moment, his eyes drifting along your face as he brought it to his ear, letting the tangled white cord tether the two of you together.

He’d never heard the song before, but he still remembered thinking how fitting it was. Dreamy and melodic - just like you. The singer's voice was full of raw sincerity, adding another layer of atmospheric haze to the already heady beat while the chorus gradually filled the space between you.

He didn't have the right words to explain it at the time, but he felt lucky as he watched you stare out the window that day. Lucky to know how pretty you looked when the sunlight caught the side of your face. Lucky to know which fantasy novels you liked to spend hours losing yourself in. Lucky to know what type of music you listened to when you were deep in thought. Lucky, just to be sitting next to you.

His heart jumped around in his chest when your eyes met his again. Both of you exchanging the same somber smile as you realized what road you were on.

He handed his half of the headphones back to you, secretly relieved at how calm you still seemed despite the fact that your stop was next.

“That song,” he hesitated, the lyrics still swirling through his mind. “what was it –”

But his question came to an abrupt end as the bus began to brake, a new and overwhelming warmth dancing through his veins when he noticed how close you suddenly were to him.

His pupils doubled in size, his breath catching in his throat while you leaned in carefully, pressing the softest kiss against his boyish cheek.

"Have a good summer, Yuuji." you whispered, grabbing your backpack off the floor.

His hand rested where your lips had been, his gaze following you off of the bus. You made it about halfway up your driveway before pausing to look back at him over your shoulder, two lingering smiles blurring past one another as the driver hurried on with her route.

The next two months were filled with sunshine and soccer practice for him. Bike rides and camping trips and basketball courts. His days were usually full, but no matter what he was doing or where he was going, there was one song that was always on the tip of his tongue:

♫⋆｡ ♪ ₊ ﾟ“Do you want me? Just how I am? Do you need me and where I stand?”

One song that would forever remind him of you:

"Let's go steady, let's make a plan. Marinade on that for a little while." ⋆｡ ♪ ₊♬ ﾟ。

And he did.

He marinaded on the infatuation he felt for you the rest of that entire summer.

When August arrived that year and brought everyone back for high school, he was ready.

There were stories he wanted to tell you, questions he wanted to ask you. Playlists he wanted to make with you. Books he'd found while thrifting that he wanted to give to you. Daydreams he had of roaming the halls and laughing with you. Visions of bringing his lunch into the library so he could eat with you. He couldn't wait to hear about your summer. Couldn't wait to catch up with you. Couldn't wait to see you.

Unfortunately for you both though, life had other, much darker plans in store for the pink-haired boy who just wanted to carry around your books for you and hold your hand during passing period.

He was called out of class early on the first day. Forced to leave the building before he even had the chance to see you as he frantically tracked down the nearest shuttle and rushed across town to get to the hospital. His grandpa’s health had been on a slow decline, but after his most recent fall, it had suddenly started to plummet.

Yuuji missed the majority of that week, dedicating all of his time to the man who had essentially raised him. He would bring him food and sit with him for hours even though he was mostly incoherent. He’d tell him about his day and leave flowers by his bedside. He'd watch reruns of old game shows with him that they used to watch when Yuuji was little, completely ignoring the nurses who would say things like, "You need to give yourself a break.”

The hospital staff tried their best to get him to take a day off. To go back to school and live his own life, but Yuuji just couldn’t. His grandpa was the only family he'd ever really had. There was no way he was going to leave him. He ditched the comfort of his bedroom and began sleeping on the cramped hospital futon next to the grey-haired man, teaching himself what each machine hooked up to him was responsible for and what vitals they monitored. He’d sometimes leave throughout the day, but it was only for a couple of hours at most. He'd return with more flowers and books to read to him. By the third week of school, he'd missed almost every single one of his classes, but he didn’t care. His priorities were firm.

Yuuji stayed by his side - day in and day out, until the very end.

When he woke up to the sound of erratic beeping and codes that he didn't understand being called out by nurses, he knew. He knew in his heart that this was it. Amongst the chaos were two sets of shaking hands reaching for each other, his grandpa's last words hanging heavily in the space between them,

“Yuuji... You're a strong kid, try your best to help others, okay?”

He remembered thinking at that moment that there couldn’t be a worse feeling. That he couldn’t possibly have anything else left to lose. He was only 15 and he was now officially all on his own as he watched the only parental figure he had let out his last breath of air.

He had no family, no future, no chance.

Fate was a cruel and calculating thing though. A few days after the funeral, Yuuji discovered that he did have a future. One that was irreversibly sealed the minute he stepped foot into Jujutsu High. He had to let go of everything he'd known in exchange for the damning task of becoming a vessel for Ryomen Sukuna. He had to trade in his mundane role of being a high school freshman for the daunting responsibility of becoming a first-year sorcerer. And arguably the hardest thing of all, he had to give up the simple pleasure of sharing a set of tangled headphones with you to try and save a world that didn't truly care about him.

There was no room for normalcy anymore. This was his new life and it was ending, one day at a time.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

He sat at a nearly vacant bar by himself, staring down the empty glass in front of him, watching the ice melt as he ran a shaky hand along the back of his neck.

It was 4 o'clock and he was only one of two people here this early. The lights and music were still being adjusted by the workers. Cups being stocked and coolers being filled for the inevitable Saturday-night rush that would come in the next few hours. His goal was to be absolutely obliterated by then - to already be on his way back home before the swarm of college students took over.

He paused, noticing the calendar hanging by the craft beer list in front of him. His heart stuttered a bit as he blinked back at the date. No wonder he'd been feeling so reminiscent lately.

He leaned over the counter hoping to find the bartender who'd poured his first drink, but to no avail.

He grabbed his glass, sucking down the very last drop of whiskey it had to offer, trying desperately to drown out the realization that today was his 22nd birthday and the people who should be here with him weren't.

Almost every friend he'd made over the last ten years had been ripped away from him. They were scattered memories. Familiar voices that he did his best to hold onto. Faces, names, deaths that followed him everywhere he went.

Middle school and the innocence of just wanting to hold a pretty girl's hand while she walked down the hallway were long gone. He was an adult now. A very tired and traumatized adult.

He peered around the corner again, half-tempted to jump over the bar and pour himself another drink when the stereo kicked on, an overwhelming wave of pure, deep blue nostalgia flooding over him without warning.

His back straightened, his eyes suddenly darting towards the speaker as the lyrics drifted across his skin, causing every hair on his body to stand up at once.

"She wanted to die by a river. She wanted the tide to come up and drag her away, so that when she's dreamin', she can watch the tree line fall away." ⋆｡ ♪

It was the same hazy melody that he'd spent an entire summer listening to on repeat. He still knew every word, every beat. It was muscle memory the way his fingertips began to drum along the counter when a bartender finally emerged from the back.

"Sorry, do you need a –"

Time stilled, the glass nearly slipping from his hand as your gaze caught his.

"Yuuji?"

Despite how much you'd changed since the last time he saw you, your voice was somehow just as soft as he remembered it being.

He stared back at you in quiet disbelief, guilt quickly settling in the pit of his stomach as he thought about how fucking strange and unexpected this all must feel for you too.

From your perspective, he'd spent all of 8th grade trying to befriend you only to up and leave without even saying goodbye. And now, 7 years later - he was at your work, looking back at you like you were an actual angel, and forgetting every word he knew.

Your eyes stayed locked on his for another moment, both of you studying the person in front of you before you finally let out a shaky breath and smiled at him.

"Here," You offered, suddenly feeling the need to soothe your own nerves too. "On the house."

He tried to tell you that he could pay for it, but it was too late. You were already pouring two shots and motioning for him to put his wallet away.

"Okay, fine. But..." There was a glimmer in his eye as he pulled his glass away from yours. "What are we toasting to?"

The smile he gave you felt like a warm hug. One that you didn't realize you needed until you had it again. "Oh," You stammered, trying to ignore the blood that was rushing to your cheeks. "What about... To old friends?"

He nodded, still wearing the same expression as your drinks lightly knocked together. "To old friends."

He couldn't help but grin again at the little shiver that swept across your body as you finished yours.

Your hair was longer, your features a bit more mature, but your mannerisms were all the same. You were still the girl that was made up of mid-day sunlight, handbound books, and shades of blue that were too pretty to exist in this world.

You grabbed a beer out of the cooler and slid it to him, once again ignoring the credit card he tried to hand you. "Yuuji, relax." you leaned against the counter, resting your head in your hands so that you were eye-level with him. "They're not gonna go bankrupt over a $2 IPA, I promise."

"If you say so."  

You both exchanged the same small smile, his finger lightly running along the counter. "So," he cleared his throat, completely unsure of where to start. "How've you been?"

It was a loaded question, maybe even a dumb question considering how much time had passed, but he didn't care. He really did want to know how you'd been. What you'd been up to. What type of things you'd been writing about. What your Spotifty playlists looked like. What you did on your days off. He wanted to know everything. All of it.

"Well," you exhaled, trying to find an easy way to condense the last seven years of your life. "My parents..." your eyebrows furrowed, realizing that you'd never gotten the chance to tell him why you used to dread your old bus route so much. "My parents finally got divorced..."

“Oh shit, I’m sorry -"

“No,” You said swiftly, not wanting him to feel bad for asking. "It was more of a relief than anything. They used to fight, a lot. My mom wasn't always the nicest when she drank... It probably should've happened way sooner to be honest."

His breathing slowed as memories of you with tears in your eyes walking up your driveway smashed through his mind. He'd promised himself that he would ask you about it one day, but he had no idea it'd be this much later on. He'd wanted to talk to you about it as kids. Wanted to know what scared you so much about going home, but he didn't know how. It was the reason why he left journals on your desk. The reason why he never let you go without the next book in your series.

For everything he couldn't say, he tried to show. But he'd failed you on both accounts the day he disappeared.

"My parents separated my -" you paused, eyes dragging to his as you corrected yourself. "our graduation year."

He nodded, doing his best to digest the thought of you walking down the aisle in a cap and gown with the weight of your parents' downfall on your shoulders.

"But, after that," you smiled slightly. “I applied to college and got accepted. Started working here. Got my own apartment. And I don't know...” you shrugged, "I think in a weird way, things happened the way they were supposed to. It was like everything needed to fall apart before it got better, you know?"

He smiled back at you, your last sentence lingering in the space between you as he reached for your hand. He probably wouldn't have understood that sentiment a year ago, but watching your eyes widen while your fingers slowly tangled into his, he knew exactly what you meant now.

"I'm really sorry I wasn't there..." His thumb brushed against the side of your hand, steadying himself as he let 15-year-old him and 22-year-old him come together to say what they had both been holding onto for so long. "I didn't want to leave. I just -"

Your heart swelled in your chest, watching him blink back tears he wasn't prepared to shed. "Life got really hard for a really long time for me too. But, whenever I felt myself drifting... I thought of you. Thought of the way you'd glance at me from over your book during class. Thought of the way you smiled when you thought no one was watching. I thought of you... all the time. And it was like, no matter how dark things got, it reminded me that life could be good, because it was at one point. So..."

Your hand tightened around his, two sets of glossy eyes now staring back at each other as he forced himself to say what he should've years ago. "I'm sorry that I wasn't there, but... I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere."

You were dizzy with emotion. Swimming through feelings that you'd kept buried for nearly the last decade. The thoughts you'd only been brave enough to write down. The overwhelming urge to kiss him again and again and again until neither one of you had any air left in your lungs.

Your mouth opened and then closed, your body saying more than you were capable of with how desperately you were holding onto him.

You weren't sure what you were doing. Didn't have time to think or care about the repercussions of your impulsiveness.

"Hey Mai," You called out, "I'm really not feeling well. Think I'm gonna go home."

Yuuji's head was shaking no, but the surprised smile tugging at the corner of his mouth was saying otherwise. "What're you doing?" he whisper-shouted, watching you run around the bar to grab his hand again.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Mai yelled from the back, but it was too late.

You and Yuuji were already gone, practically sprinting alongside each other, laughing as you booked it across the parking lot.

"First the free beer and now this?"

"They won't go bankrupt over me missing one day." You winked. "C'mon, I wanna show you something."

You may have been leading the way, but he was still the athlete between the two of you, purposefully slowing himself down to not be right on your heels. But when he noticed you starting to pant as the road curved into an upward slope, he reached out for you, gently spinning you around to face him.

"Come here." he knelt down, positioning himself so that you could easily wrap your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck.

He carried you piggy-back style up the hill, the sun fading into an array of pink and orange as you pointed out every bookstore around campus, explaining which ones were your favorites and why. Promising to get matcha with him tomorrow at a local coffee shop you passed. Asking him about his time at Jujutsu High and trying to wrap your mind around what little he was able to tell you as he swore that he'd fill you in on the full story when the time was right. You caught him up on what he'd missed the last three years of high school and how your college classes had been going. You talked about libraries and ghosts and laughed about how in 7th grade he'd joined the occult club just because he thought it'd be an easy after-school credit.

By the time you'd finally reached the spot you'd wanted to show him, the moon had almost completely replaced the sun. Your cheeks hurt from smiling and your hands were full of a mixture of different flowers that he'd picked for you along the way.

"This is..." he trailed off, watching the sky shift into a deep blend of blue and silver. "Beautiful. How'd you even find this place?"

It was an abandoned park surrounded by overgrown trees that overlooked the city, only one rusted swing set left to its name. The hike you had to endure just to find it had more than likely been the cause of its demise, trekking up here with a backpack was hard enough, let alone a stroller.

"I kinda found it by accident." You shrugged. "I was working on an art project and needed a good view of the skyline. I looked up a bunch of different places online, but then I saw this spot and just knew."

Yuuji pulled off his hoodie, sweat trickling down his neck from the late-summer heat as the two of you sat in the grass, his arm gently wrapping around your waist.

There had been so many times you'd sat in this exact same spot by yourself, wondering what the odds were that you were both somehow looking up at the same star.

Your head rested on his shoulder, a warm gust of air swirling around you as you both looked out into the distance, watching the way the stars faded into the Tokyo lights.

"Hey, Yuuji?" You twirled a blade of grass between your fingers, not wanting to ruin the moment, but still needing to be sure.

"Yeah?"

"You promise, right?"

"Hm?" He could hear the concern in your voice, his grip tightening as he pulled you closer.

"You promise that... you're not leaving again?"

"I swear, I'm not going anywhere. And if I do," His eyes returned to yours, his free hand attentively resting under your chin. "I'm taking you with me."

You nodded, warmth washing over you as he traced along your jawline, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear.

Your fears were lost to his touch. Your worries dissolving into the sincerity of his voice. Your need for reassurance wholeheartedly met when his hand cupped your cheek and his lips finally caught yours. Seven years' worth of pent-up feelings pouring out between the two of you, hands roaming and little moans slipping out between breaths while you tugged on the collar of his shirt to bring him closer. He was gentle but eager. Soft but secure. Perfect, in every way.

He hovered over you, easing you onto the grass as he made a makeshift pillow out of his hoodie for you to rest your head on.

You smiled as his lips drifted from your mouth to your neck, his palm delicately traveling up your shirt, pulling your bra to the side while he helped slide your tank-top up over your head. He kissed your collarbones, whispering sweet little praises into your skin. "You're gorgeous, you know that?"

He rested a hand under your back, steadying you as his tongue flickered across your chest. He took his time, making sure to give each nipple the same amount of attention, still humming things like, "the prettiest girl I've ever seen" while his hand traced over your hip.

He tugged at the waistline of your shorts, looking up at you through his lashes as he began to leave featherlight kisses along the inside of your thigh, his blood racing at the sounds you were suddenly making.

"Does that feel good, baby?"

You whimpered out a broken "yes", practically dripping when his fingers spread you apart. He watched you writhe beneath him, drawing slow but firm circles around you. Trying not to lose himself to the way your legs were already shaking for him.

"Yuuji," you whined. "I -" his mouth was ghosting your center, his fingers still playing with your clit while he held you in place. "I n - need you." your voice was heady, lost somewhere in the clouds the faster he went. "I wanna f - feel you, so bad."

"Yeah?" He smiled, his breath still fanning across your core as his digits prodded carefully at your entrance. He groaned at how beautifully your walls swallowed him. "I wanna feel you too."

Your head lulled back, eyes pointed at the sky while your hand tangled into his pink hair. His mouth was warm and heavenly, his tongue running uppp and dowwnnn your center, saliva mixing with slick while his fingers plunged into you.

"Oh, fuck."

He only went deeper the louder you got, flattening his tongue against you with just the right pressure to keep you saying his name. His ring and middle finger hitting spots you'd never been able to reach yourself. You were clenching around him, your thighs locking around his head as you rocked against his tongue.

"Yuuji - you're gonna make me -" he thought it was adorable the way you struggled to get more than two words out at a time. "Fuck, I -"

"Mhmm, just like that."

He was in the same daze you were, sliding in and out of you feverishly until he finally felt the blissful release of your walls spasming around him. Your body suddenly unable to hold it in any longer as you gave him the privilege of really tasing you.

"Oh my god," he moaned, faithfully lapping up every bit of you he could get, only pulling away when you started begging for him.

"Yuuji -" It was needy and light-headed. "Come here, come here. Please."

The way he lifted his head up, smiling at you with your cum dripping down his chin made something inside you ache.

You pulled him towards you, desperately wrapping your legs around his waist as he began undoing the buttons on his pants. He kissed you, again and again and again, using it as a pleasant distraction while he wriggled himself free.

He took a breath, both of you watching in blitzed out awe as he lined himself up with you. "I love you." he whispered, your eyes widening from the blend of his words and the feeling of his tip slowly entering you. "Always have."

His hair brushed against your forehead as he parted your lips with his tongue, your nails digging into his neck with his first full thrust. You were so tight and warm around him.

He tried to ease into you, encouraging you while also making sure you were comfortable. His voice sweet as honey as he asked you things like, "Is that okay, baby?" and "Aw, you like when I go deep like that, huh?"

Your gaze locked with his, your eyebrows knitting together the faster his rhythm became.

You'd thought about this moment before. Thought about what it might feel like, but nothing could've prepared you for the way your heart would race at the sound of him moaning, "You're doing so good for me." The way he'd hold you, looking back at you with stars in his eyes as he filled every inch of you.

"Yuuji -"

"Let it out, baby. S'okay." He whispered, his hand reaching for yours. "I've got you."

Your vision was blurred by the feeling of his tip meeting your cervix, warm summer air brushing against your skin as you reached your breaking point.

"I love you." The words left your mouth so fast you barely had time to register them, but then... they wouldn't stop. It was the only phrase you remembered how to say. The only emotion you remembered how to feel. "I love you." you whimpered again, feeling yourself tighten around him as your confession became more frantic. "Oh - mygod, Yuuji. I love you. I love you. I love - you."

His movements were suddenly beyond his control, his body completely succumbing to the grip of yours. "Fuck, baby - I -" He didn't know if he should pull out. Didn't know if he could pull out. His head was everywhere, his mouth dropping open the longer he watched you.

Your legs locked around him in heady reassurance. "Mm'mm, d - don't stop." You panted. "Cum with me."

It was a sentence he'd only ever thought he'd be lucky enough to hear you say in his dreams.

His hips stilled after one more thrust, your walls holding him tight as he began to twitch inside you. His forehead pressed against yours, his arms struggling to keep him propped up.

You exchanged the same exhausted smirk, leaning up to kiss him while he carefully pulled out of you. A blend of fluids spilling out onto the grass beneath you as he laid by your side with his forearm over his face, trying to regain his composure.

There was a calm silence that settled between you, the both of you looking up at the stars before you rolled over to reach for your shorts, letting him catch his breath while you dug something out of the back pocket.

"Here." You said, unraveling a tangled pair of headphones and handing him one.

His eyes widened with the same curiosity they had 7 years ago as he held it to his ear, your head resting on his chest while a song he knew all too well flowed through the small speakers connecting you. A smile splitting across his face as he held you closer.

"You know, I think you were right." he exhaled, running light fingertips along your arm. "Everything did have to fall apart before it got better."

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

[writer-in-theory]

you're gonna go far, love — spencer reid.

“I’ve been ready for you to come home for so long that I didn’t think to ask you where you’d gone.” —Noah Kahan (Orange Juice)

Summary: After Spencer relapses, he takes the first flight out of Virginia with no plan other than to get a fresh start. Or, my take on where he was for Evolution. Pairing: Spencer Reid x Gn!Reader (not the focus, but it's there) Category: Hurt/Comfort WC: 2k Content Warnings: Discussions of relapse, Mentions of alcohol, Slight spoiler for the ending of Evolution S1 (despite the fact I still haven't finished it myself) Notes: This is for the New Beginnings challenge hosted by @imagining-in-the-margins and based on a prompt from @foxy-eva , so thank you so much to you lovely people. This fic comes 2 years after my last CM fic, and a few months since I've written anything at all, so thank you for the inspiration 💜

Spencer booked the first flight out of Virginia five days after it happened. 

The person at the counter may have said the destination, but it floated straight past his ears and was carried far away. Within hours, everything he’d spent the past two decades building was left thirty thousand feet below him. 

Emily would be hurt. Everyone would be, as each of them heard the news as they one-by-one came into the office tomorrow. But it would be Emily, who was the first to notice the cracks in his once carefully crafted facade all those years ago, who would feel the most betrayed by his sudden escape. 

You should’ve at least said goodbye.

It was what Spencer had been most upset by when Emily had faked her death. After everything they’d been through together, after all of the joy they brought into each others’ incredibly stressful lives, all Spencer had needed was the chance to say goodbye and know that she was out there, somewhere, happy. 

Hopefully, she’d understand why he had to leave now, though. 

Everyone in the BAU had figured out by now that the Spencer Reid who walked out of prison was not the same as the one who’d first stepped into it. Some piece of him—and even now, he wasn’t sure how large that piece was—had been laid bare and morphed beyond even his own recognition. The loss of that part of him ached in the way that losing a loved one did, that sharp stabbing sort of ache that would appear so suddenly that he didn’t know how to handle it. 

There was no way to explain it to the rest of the team, though, no matter how supportive they tried to be. The fact was that none of them had ever nor would ever go through what he exactly had, and for not the first time in his life, Spencer began to feel like a rip current was sweeping him away from the steadiness of shore. 

It wasn’t until he was far enough away from shore that he couldn’t see the relief of the sands that his mind recalled that he’d been prescribed painkillers several months prior. 

It wasn’t the same as what Tobias Hankel had given him so many years ago, nor was it the alternatives he’d managed to find in the months after, but it was devastatingly similar enough that he’d tried to convince the emergency room doctor not to order it in the first place. ‘Pick it up anyway, just in case. No one can recover from a gunshot wound without pain relief.’ 

He’d almost flushed the amber bottle’s contents the day he’d gotten them, but the bone-deep feeling that had eased with time but never truly gone away kept him from fully eliminating that option from his life. Why should one thing that had happened to him years ago deny him proper pain relief now, should he need it? So they’d sat untouched, locked away in his gun safe for months. 

Until five days ago.

After well over a decade in recovery, Spencer knew this was always a possibility. He’d seen friends go through the same thing and had been there to support them in whatever ways he could because no matter how many times it happened the initial feelings of shock, shame, and overbearing grief could be just as overwhelming as the first. 

A day after, when he’d woken up and realized just what had occurred, Spencer had walked himself to the nearest NA meeting. Like he was on auto-pilot, he moved through every piece of advice he had gathered through the years—the stories of success and the stories of forced learning serving as guides to him. It wasn’t the first time Spencer had relapsed (a word that still struck fear in him to even think about), nor would it likely be the last time he was forced to confront this part of his past. 

Still, this was the first time Spencer walked out of the building, packed a bag, and made a silent escape from the city he called home. There was something different about this time, though he had no idea where to even begin considering the specifics of why.

He ended up in Cincinnati, Ohio.

In all the years he’d been with the BAU, they’d never once been called there. It was like every other city Spencer had been in in many ways—the buildings towering above him as he walked, the river that bordered the city mirroring the home he’d just left, even down to the FBI headquarters that was quiet now in the middle of the night. Still, he couldn’t help but feel as though it were completely separate from everything he’d known before, because the melancholy Spencer had been sitting in for the last five days had suddenly turned comforting amongst the atmosphere of the city.

He ended up in a bar, of all places. It was the kind that only served nonalcoholic drinks, the kind of place where people like him could sit without feeling outside of the norm. Music was playing softly in the background, and though it was busy there was only a gentle rumble of conversation in the room.

“You’re staring at that glass like it’ll kill you. It’s safe, Scout’s honor.” The teasing voice surprised Spencer out of the careful contemplation he’d fallen into. It came from the bartender, who was busying themselves with wiping down a few glasses, stood just on the other side of the bar in front of him.

“You know, that only works if you were actually a scout,” Spencer returned, though raised the glass to his lips after. It was sweet—a little too sweet by his standards, though it was a comfort now after the week he’d had.

“I won’t tell if you don’t,” the bartender said back. They looked comfortable here, like this sober bar were an extension of their own home. At one time, the BAU office had been the same for him. “You look like you could use a friendly face, and that just happens to be my favorite part of the job.”

“Part of the job…?”

“Oh you know, bartenders are the therapists for the lonely, or something like that.” They were comfortable, and more open to an effective stranger than Spencer ever thought possible. It was refreshing in a way, to be able to talk with them without having to worry about what case information he could get out of them. It wasn’t often, anymore, that he could relax and talk to someone just to talk to them. “What brings you to the Queen City?”

“I moved here,” Spencer answered automatically, looking down sheepishly at his glass before adding, “today, actually.”

“Oh, congrats then. New job?”

“More like a new start.”

It was quiet for only a moment before the bartender asked in a softer voice, “How long had it been?”

Spencer almost asked them what they meant, until he met their gaze. They had their full attention on him now, glasses left abandoned on the inner part of the bar. They’d been kind from the start, but the look they gave him now was the sort of pure understanding that made Spencer realize all at once what they were referring to.

“How did you know?”

The bartender sighed, though there was no sadness to it at all. They pulled something from their pocket, sliding it gently across the bar so Spencer could see. A metallic chip was place between them, silver on the outside and filled in with a green-blue color and a “V” engraved in the middle of it. It was different from the ones he’d used, but he recognized the meaning of it all the same. 

“I opened this place because the day I relapsed, five years ago now, I’d had nowhere to go after. There wasn’t anywhere people like us could go and relax without having to answer the tough questions, like why I drank orange juice instead of ‘what all the other adults were drinking’. It seemed silly at the time, but I think I was just looking for somewhere I could feel normal.”

“My family were the ones who helped me get sober, and sometimes they still forget and will ask me why I’m not drinking.” Spencer returned the sentiment with a light laugh. He loved everyone in the BAU, and even though it had only been a few days he already missed them terribly, but it was nice to have someone there who understood what he was feeling, what he was going through now.

“Exactly!” The bartender said, following Spencer’s lead and letting out a laugh of their own. “Though I can’t say I ever moved to a new city because of it.”

“It was the most impulsive thing I’ve ever done,” Spencer admitted. “I…really needed a fresh start. I needed somewhere noone knew who I was, somewhere I could get a completely different job and…I don’t know, figure out who I am.”

The bartender nodded. “Sounds about right. This family you left behind, are you gonna go back to them?”

“Eventually. We’ve worked together for so many years. I spent more time with them than I’ve actually ever spent alone, and I think I just need…”

“Something new,” the bartender finished, “I’m starting to catch on. What d’you think you’ll do?”

“I’ve always loved teaching. Maybe that?”

“You know, I have some friends who work at UC. Depending on what you wanted to teach, I could see if they could get you an interview.”

“Just like that?” Spencer asked, wondering only briefly if there was going to be a catch somewhere down the line.

The bartender shrugged. “Why not? I never up and moved cities, but I’m no stranger to new beginnings.”

“I wouldn’t recommend moving cities without thinking it through,” Spencer laughed then. “I have no plan for what comes next.”

“Do you have somewhere to stay, at least?”

Spencer only winced, which he was sure was answer enough for them. He was expecting some kind of sympathetic response, but he never expected the bartender to shrug again and say, “Well, how about I be a little impulsive too. I’ve been looking for a new roommate, why don’t you stay tonight and see how it goes?”

“Really?”

“Yeah, sure. You seem decent enough not to be some secret axe-murderer or something.”

Oh, the irony. 

Spencer didn’t really know this person except for the limited conversation they’d had so far. It would’ve been safer, and probably smarter, for him to just find a hotel room for the night and come up with a plan later. But something was telling him that he should agree, that there was something more to this person that he wanted to get to know. 

So not for the first time that day, Spencer trusted his gut and nodded. “Okay, let’s try it.”

It wasn’t a fix for everything. The changes would come slowly, so slowly that sometimes Spencer himself wouldn’t even notice them happening. It would take time to get to a place where Spencer felt okay again, and a large help in that ended up being his new roommate who seemed to just get him in more ways than one. As time went by, Cincinnati truly began to feel like home. 

And two years after he’d left, when Spencer turned on the news and saw the BAU standing before a large crowd as they announced they’d finally caught the serial killer behind the shipping container murders, he finally felt the string tugging him back in the direction of Quantico.

His home was there in Cincinnati, with the person who’d become a friend and even more in the last two years and the professor job that he came to love, but Spencer knew—beyond a shadow of a doubt—that it was time to see his family again, too. 

[kaciidubs]

NO BC BABY IM LOSING MY FUCKING MIND PROFESSOR CHANGBIN FUCKING YOU RIGHT QUICK BEFORE CLASS STARTS JUST BENDING YOU OVER THE NEAREST DESK HOLY FUCK IM NOT FINE

Rip estee

HOLY FUCK- OH MY GOD- OH- OHHH-- ESTEE- DARLING- FUCK- FUCKING HELL-

❣ Warnings: College Professor! Changbin [mentioned to be a little older than reader], slight public sex, oral [Fem receiving], unprotected sex implied, Dom! Changbin, slightly bratty Reader, praise, slight spit play ❣ ❣ Word Count: 468 ❣ Female! Reader [No use of Y/n] You/Your pronouns ❣ ❣ Additional Tags: Changbin is referred to as Sir, Reader is referred to as bunny, good student, and slut

Two hours before class started.

Two hours before the large room would be filled with your fellow classmates, your friends who always made fun of you for your crush on Professor Seo - the one professor who wasn't even that much older than your entire class.

Oh, if they only knew.

If they could see the way he had you now, bent over the large desk at the front of the class, your skirt hastily flipped over your ass and your panties in a pool around your right ankle as he knelt behind you, ravishing your wet cunt as if it were his first meal of the day.

"S-Sir! Fuck-" His hands gripped your ass cheeks like they were stress balls, keeping you spread for his mouth to lap messily at your clit. "Please! I need- need your cock, please!"

Backing away from you with an unceremonious slurp, you felt his presence disappear from between your legs and you almost had half the mind to beg him to finish you off.

"I had an hour of my office hours booked for you, bunny - I've been dying for a taste of this sweet pussy but someone had to cancel." He scoffed, thumbs massaging your lower back as he observed your laid out form.

"I-I had a test, you knew this!" You hated the whine in your voice, but he had you bent over his desk the minute you snuck into the room, giving you nothing but his tongue, lips, and fingers without letting you even taste your orgasm.

Humming in understanding, he lifted his hands off of you to undo the belt around his hips, wasting no time in shoving his slacks down and tugging his boxer briefs low enough to pull his cock out, heavy and hot in his hand. "I know, you're such a good student, you know that?"

An annoyed groan vibrated in your throat, "I'd rather be a really good slut right about now, Changbin." Adding more incitement to your statement, you wiggled your hips, feeling your ass jiggle and hearing the deprived groan from the man behind you. "Come on, show me what I could've had during those office hours of yours."

Within an instant, his hands reclaimed their home on your ass, spreading them so he could notch the fat head of his cock at your fluttering hole. Slightly hunching over, a fat glob of spit fell from his lips and landed where your bodies were currently meeting, a chill running down your spine from the sensation.

"You wanna be my good slut? Alright." Pressing your lower half against the edge of the desk, he pushed his hips forward, forcing his tip past your tight walls and stretching your poor, needy cunt over his chubby cock. "From now on, it's Sir, slut."

[destourtereaux]

his #1 best friend - james f. potter x fem!reader (part 2)

read part one first!! summary: after a month of dating james, you come to discover some bizarre flutterings within your heart. the problem is, you’re sure he doesn’t feel the same way… wc: 2.1k taglist: follow @lovebirdupdates and turn on notifs!

prompts (from @novelbear): “sad…i have a blanket with all this extra room and no one to share it with.” “don’t say that, i love every minute spent with you”

a/n: it’s been so long since i've written anything! praise the winter holidays for allowing my creative juices to flow again :) also… i tried some angst in this one! it’s not great, but it’s my first time, and it was pretty fun to write. i hope you enjoy!

It had been a week since you made the unnerving discovery of your developing feelings toward your best friend. You repressed them as best you could…but it’s as they say: the heart wants what the heart wants. It was just bad luck that yours wanted James Potter, while his wanted Lily Evans.

Now, everytime the Gryffindor paid for a date, it was no longer a moment of happiness; instead, it served as more of a reminder that this was simply a deal between the two of you – nothing of substance. Worse, you knew Lily was slowly taking more of an interest in James, a fact he eagerly reported on every mealtime, a reminder of the ticking countdown on your ‘relationship’. Although you knew that whatever you two had was foundationally fake, you couldn’t help but dread the day you would have to say goodbye for good.

The next month was a big month for Gryffindor. The first official Quidditch Cup matches were about to begin, following the months of recreational play. The game was Gryffindor vs. Hufflepuff, and James had been spending every waking minute with his team on the pitch. You, on the other hand, were preparing for some grueling midterm exams. The Quidditch athletes might have gotten them postponed, but you weren’t as lucky… So, while James was coaching and running drills, you were practically breathing DADA, Charms, Transfiguration and whatnot. This led to a lot of all-nighters for both of you, and only a brief, exhausted conversation before you both drifted off into sleep.

******

On the day of the big game, James was hyped. No matter how nervous he may have been on the days preceding the match, he only ever felt excitement on the day of. After one of his famous pep talks to the team, they were off.

A few moments later, James scored his first goal, welcomed by thunderous applause from the red and gold crowds in the stadium. But his mind was on one person and one person only. As he flew past the stands, his eyes searched for you instinctively, sifting through the hundreds of spectators. In fact, the action was so automatic that he never stopped to process how just a month ago, it would’ve been Lily he was looking for.

Much to James’ disappointment, you weren’t in your usual row, where he’d grown accustomed to you screaming with the crowd and smiling at him with unbridled joy. He glanced around in concern – just where were you? You usually never missed a match…

He stored a mental reminder to look for you immediately after the game, and rejoined his team.

******

You didn’t mean to miss the game. It’s just that you had been studying so hard lately, skipping meals and losing sleep in order to keep your grades up. One moment you were reading over the Potions textbook and the next, you were fast asleep, cheek pressed onto the page.

This was how James found you. Instead of joining in the festivities in the Common Room, he found himself pulling away and heading up the girls staircases. He pushed open your dorm door, hoping you were alright, and found you curled in your chair, hair strewn over the pages of your book, wearing his Quidditch jersey.

And just like that, his concern and disappointment melted away, leaving behind a warm feeling in his chest. ‘You look good in my jersey’, he thought, before covering you with a blanket and turning off the lights.

******

You woke up an hour later. You rubbed your eyes, drowsy for a second. Then, realization hit as you caught sight of the time… “Shit. I missed the game.”

Your first thought was of James, and you practically ran out of your room in a rush to find him and apologize. You hurried up the boys’ side, passing by the celebrations without a second thought. Shoving open James’ door, you find him asleep on his bed, a peaceful expression of happiness on his face.

‘I guess he must not have noticed that I was away,’ you thought, with a pang of sadness in your heart. You mumbled a quick ‘Nox’ and turned away, heading back out so as to not disturb the exhausted Gryffindor, but you’re stopped by the sound of his voice.

“Aw, leaving so soon, Y/N/N? That’s sad – I have this blanket with all this extra room and no one to share it with…” he pouts. 

Your heart leaps, and you roll your eyes at him, “you’re so cheesy, Potter.” But you climb in beside him regardless, revelling in the heat radiating off of him. “You’re like an oven – how are you this warm?”

“Maybe it’s so I can keep you close,” James jokes, still half asleep, “we all know you’re basically cold-blooded.”

You scoff, “wow, and I was going to apologize for missing the big game.”

“Y/N? Apologizing? Now that, I’ve got to see,” James laughs, and dodges the slap you try to land on his arm – curse those Quidditch reflexes. “Oh come on, Y/N/N, I’m kidding! I missed you at the game today. Seriously.”

You wince, “I know. I’m so sorry. I can’t believe I fell asleep. I was prepared for it too!” pointing at your attire.

The boy smiles, looking at the jersey you’re donning, and kisses your forehead. “I know. You look stunning, honest. It definitely threw me off to see your spot empty though. You’re my good luck charm, you know.”

Your heart jumps at these words, betraying your brain’s messages to stop believing in this - whatever this was. Your cheeks bloom with red, and you’re glad the dark of the room hides their flush. “Yeah yeah, save the lines. We all know that’s your ‘Lily flower’” you poke with a forced laugh, ignoring the pang in your chest.

To your surprise, James doesn’t join in. Instead, he pauses, as though confused, before offering up a slow smile. “Ah, but she’s not here right now, is she? Y/N, you are the only girl for me. Swear on Godric.”

You laugh awkwardly. He’s joking, you know he is. The whole of Hogwarts knows of James’ undying love for Evans, it’s like a part of him. So why is he acting as though you even hold a candle to Lily’s flame? Screw it, you think. You might as well enjoy the moment while it lasts. And so, your smile is genuine as you drift off to sleep in the Gryffindor’s warm embrace.

Hours later, Sirius and Remus head up after the party to find the two of you, fast asleep in James’ room. They sigh simultaneously, wondering why the hell you’re both so blind.

******

You were able to make it to the next game! Midterms were basically over, save History of Magic, but you already knew that was a lost cause. And so, you headed to the pitch along with the rest of the school, clamouring and cheering for Gryffindor.

You were the first face James noticed when he looked over at the crowd before the whistle. You smiled at him, and your eyes crinkled at the corners. James beamed back, so lost in thought of you that he almost got in the way of a pass between his chasers.

Your mouth forms a perfect ‘O’ of fear, but thankfully, he recovers, and the bastard even has the audacity to wink at you before flying away. What an idiot, you think, as you let out the breath you’d been holding.

******

Gryffindor won again, beating Ravenclaw, albeit narrowly. James stumbled off his broom, tackled by his team members as they formed a huge heap of cheers and joy.

As soon as he could extricate himself, he pushed himself up to find you smiling at him, a bouquet clutched in your hands.

“For you! I read somewhere that guys never receive flowers, and I found that so sad. So, here you go. Congrats on another match well played, Potter.”

James is glad his cheeks are still red from the game because it helps conceal the blush spreading like rapidfire across his face. He takes the bouquet with one hand, then pulls you into his side with the other, landing a kiss on your forehead. “Thank you, Y/L/N. This means a lot,” he whispers into your hair, amidst the whistles from his teammates.

******

Back in the Gryffindor common room, music is blasting, and everyone is in high spirits. As you climb in through the portrait hole, James asks if you’d like some punch, and heads over to get some for the both of you. You’re left with Remy and Sirius on the couch, both of them looking at you with knowing smirks.

“What?” you prompt.

“What do you mean, what?” Sirius responds, “You like James. It’s rather obvious.”

Your cheeks immediately redden, and you deny it at all costs. “As if. In case you forgot, we’re fake dating. Emphasis on fake!”

Remus chimes in at this, “In the beginning, sure, but anyone with vision can tell that it’s not an act anymore. Do you know how many pranks James has blown off to spend time with you?”

You laugh at this, “maybe James is just growing up, you guys.”

“Prongs? It’ll be another 10 years before that happens,” Sirius quips, but stops as he follows your line of sight.

There, near the punch table, is your date, talking to a certain redhead. Scratch that. He was never yours. You knew this would eventually happen, so why does it still hurt like so?

Turning away so Sirius and Rem don’t see the tears welling up, you excuse yourself immediately, ignoring their protests. Running out of the common room, you curl up on a window sill looking out at the darkening sky as the tears come rolling down.

******

It feels like an eternity has passed when you finally hear a familiar voice. The very voice you could recognize anywhere and yet wish it were not here.

“Y/N! What is going on? I came back with the punch and you were gone. Sirius and Rem are giving me the cold shoulder too?”

You quickly wipe away the tear tracks off your face, hoping you don’t look too devastated. “Did Lily finally ask you out? Is the deal done?” you smile weakly, committed to the very end.

“What are you talking abou–” James starts, but you cut him off.

“I’m happy for you, Jamie, I really am. But it hurts right now. So I would appreciate it if you could leave me alone for a day or so. I’ll get over it,” you force out, knowing the last part is a lie.

James opens his mouth again, but you lift a hand. 

“I know it was stupid of me, I mean we made a contract, for Godric’s sake! How did I still manage to mess up? I went into this knowing that every date we went on, every moment we shared would be fake. Fillers for until you could repeat those same activities with Evans. So why do I still feel so bad?” you choke out, before the tears in your throat silence you.

James winces, and pulls you into his chest, stroking your back.

“If you would just let me finish, Y/L/N! You’re so stubborn, honestly. First of all, don’t say that. I love every minute spent with you. You’re kind and brave and so incredibly funny. Don’t ever think like that again. Seriously,” he starts, “and second, I was going to say that Evans never asked me out. In fact, she was congratulating me on how good you and I were together.”

You pull away and meet his eyes, stunned. “I- what? I’m so sorry James. I guess it just didn’t work ou–”

Now it's James’ turn to interrupt. “No, Y/N/N, you still don’t get it, do you? It’s not Lily for me anymore, it’s you. She was right, you make me better. I just never realized until now.”

Your eyes widen in disbelief. James Potter, the golden boy, liked you back. Your face breaks out into the first genuine grin in hours, and you finally let yourself believe it.

Seeing this, James laughs, and steals a kiss on your cheek. “Now that you’re happy and all, how about we talk about your little spiel just now?” he prompts, waggling his eyebrows. 

You elbow him, ignoring his protests, “how about no. I think we should pretend this never happened.”

“Not gonna be that easy, Y/L/N. Weren’t you just crying over me? James teases. “Hey! Wait up!” he cries out, hurrying to catch up as you hop off the ledge and walk away.

As you near the portrait hole, he finally reaches you again, and swings an arm around you.

“So… does this mean I can kiss you now?”

“James!”

******

enjoyed this? check out my masterlist! and follow @lovebirdupdates to be notified whenever i post!

[kairiscorner]

some things will never be the same. — miguel o'hara x reader (angst)

summary: he once loved, and that was his the only time he ever loved. he loved with all his heart, he loved till it was taken away from him. now that love slumbered in his still beating heart, it could never be shaken off, nor forgotten--not that he wanted to. but when that love awakens, is a part of him revived, or killed again? pairing: miguel o'hara x gn!reader genre: angst. word count: 1,353 author's note: i blame the song 'mister loverman' for all my pain making this. also, i'm so sorry for the crappy spanish TT

he didn't believe in ghosts as a young boy, he was a skeptic–believing whatever was in front of him was real, whatever was gone... was gone. it would never come back unless he could do something about it, unless he knew how to bring what was lost back. he was too quick to lose hope.

"i've go this shake in my legs, shaking the thoughts from my head."

and that was his fatal flaw.

"but who put these waves in the door?"

because despite convincing himself the one he called 'cariño', 'mi amor', 'mi vida'–his life–'mi esposa'–his spouse... he can't go one day without wondering where you would have been had he not forced himself into your life. he made you his spouse without you ever knowing this wasn't the miguel o'hara you vowed to love and be with, in sickness and in health... whom you finally parted with, with you never knowing–not even when you disappeared before his eyes.

now, he has only the ghost of you–the ghost of you whom you never loved, loving only the man who he resembled too well–whom would never be able to see, hear, touch or speak to again.

"i crack, and–"

until he went to that fucking train station.

"i... pour."

that stupid fucking train station.

he wish he never went there to begin with, wished he never looked ahead of him when he heard that recognizable clicking and clacking of heels that hurried against the platform's pavement, wished he never picked up that familiar scent that he can only relive in his dreams faintly when he imagines you in his arms, whispering to him that you love him, you need him, he's your lover.

he wished the past would just stop sinking that blade it pierced in his heart that day when he saw you in the kitchen, sheer horror and shock filling your face--petrifying you as you saw the hologram of your dead, real husband's body on the other end of the call from the police department at the morgue.

he could never forget the way you looked at him that day.

you looked at him like you didn't know him, that he was completely alien to you--that all those evenings of loving him, all those mornings of kissing him awake and teasing each other with gabi acting all grossed out over the romance you two shared... all those 'i love you's you told him... you were never really with that man you meant them all for.

and he will never forget the way those tears rolled down your cheeks as you asked him...

"who are you?"

"i'm mister loverman."

he also wished his feet would stop carrying him everywhere subconsciously as the past was busy dealing him painful, blunt blows everywhere internally.

he also wished... he didn't reach out for you.

he wished he didn't call out your name.

he wished you didn't look so much like her.

"and i miss my lover, man."

he felt a lump form in his throat, staring at your face that looked like you but not quite like you; seeing those eyes that he always swam in and got lost in every time he held you in his arms and locked his gaze in yours made him feel like he had messed up again, that the universe had witnessed the crime he had committed of prodding at old wounds and calling out that name of yours that he told himself, convinced himself, that he buried deep in the dark entrails of his mind.

but you never left his mind.

never one day, one hour, one minute, one second of his life.

"i asked, who are you?"

you asked him through gritted teeth as tears ceaselessly poured out of your bottom eyelids, your eyebrows contorting into all kinds of expressions that only boiled down to one to many feelings, until back to the one feeling you were expressing right now with your tone, shaky body language and resistance to hitting him right now with every fiber of your being: helplessness.

and you truly were helpless that day.

it was the day when everything came crashing down.

the day you discovered your husband had been long dead, that your daughter was now orphaned of a father, that you were now a widow, that this man who shared his mornings and evenings with you both at your table, singing to and playing with your daughter, carrying her to bed after a long day and retiring in your arms as you kissed him good night and sought for his embrace in the cold late hours of the night... was anybody but your husband... you felt like everything you lived for was all a sham.

you lived with a fraud, you loved a fraud.

he understood. he finally understood that feeling you felt back then... he knows he could be feeling euphoria right now; an intense, overwhelming longing that had finally been answered, had been granted to him. he should've felt grief, after having lost you that day, after losing the one person in his life he really found the space in his heart to care about... but all he felt was something close to unworthiness, a helplessly overwhelming guilt in the pit of his stomach.

"hello?" you called back out to him as you looked at him, gently waving at him with a slightly awkward smile as he seemed to still be frozen in place. "sorry, i... do i know you?" you asked him with a nervous voice, worried what could've happened to this poor man who seemed so troubled and lost.

"i'm mister loverman..."

"um, sir?" you called out to him again as he slowly began to move and reached out for you, nearly stumbling over, but his gaze never once leaving you and your face. his mouth twitched, it opened and closed, and you thought you saw his eyes glisten a bit; had he been crying? you hurriedly offered him a couple of tissues from your bag, tissues you always carried. "here, sorry they're crumpled, they're for emergencies, y'know?" you said with a sweet smile.

those damned crumpled tissues he knew all too well.

that damned little catchphrase you quipped every time you handed him one.

that damned, sweet smile.

"...i know." he muttered back as he lowered his hands and pulled away from reaching out to you, his gaze finally casting downwards, not even taking the tissues you offered him. you looked at him with confusion in your eyes, but you didn't force him to take any, it just meant more for you now. before you could even ask him what he wanted from you, the minute you looked up from your bag after stowing your tissues back in, he was gone as quickly as he came.

though at the spot where he was standing, in its stead, there was an old photo; it was yellowing by the white borders of the portrait with a few stains of aging on it due to the years not treating it very well. it was soft and tender to touch, almost like a fragile piece of the past. you took a look at the back of the photo that was facing upwards when you saw it, it read: "para mi amante, i hope you remember me every time you see this."

"for my lover."

you flipped the photo, and you couldn't make out the other person on the photo, but... that man you met earlier, the distressed-seeming man who seemed to want something from you, was the very man in that photo. he was kissing someone on the cheek, but you couldn't tell who. their face was out of the picture, you didn't know why it seemed like out of everything else in the photo, that person the man was kissing was the only thing obviously removed from the photo.

as if they were supposed to be erased.

as if they weren't meant to be kissed by that man you met.

as if... they weren't meant to be in that photo at all together.

"oh, and, i miss my lover."

tags !! @miguelswifey04 @binibinileonara @fiannee @luvstarrstruck @popeheywardssecretgf @meeom @arachnoia @melovetitties @ophanimgold

[vexic929]

Child in Time

Chapter 3

Warnings: none

Chapter 1: link Previous chapter: link Next chapter: link

This was, perhaps, the worst case scenario that in all his years and for all his knowledge, Harrison could never have predicted. For a man who was fairly used to knowing every variable ahead of time, it was jarring, unnerving. He felt inordinately shaken and could barely seem to hold his composure while Cisco, Caitlin, and Barry discussed what to do with the infant whose presence had sent him into a spiral of internal panic.

As soon as the discussion reached a point where the others were preoccupied, Harrison excused himself. He wheeled himself as calmly as he could down the hallways of S.T.A.R. Labs, his mind racing. His controlled exterior was beginning to crack and he couldn't afford that. Not now.

The entrance to the Time Vault slid open and Eobard entered, the doors sealing him in the private, secure space where he could drop the mask of Dr. Harrison Wells. He took a deep breath before standing, tossing his glasses haphazardly into the wheelchair seat, and crossing the room in two strides.

"Gideon," he called out, his voice tight.

"Good day, Dr. Wells." Gideon responded, her soothing, mechanical voice filling the room.

"Show me the future." Eobard said urgently, not interested in pleasantries.

"Certainly, Doctor."

Gideon's holographic face disappeared, a newspaper taking her place. Instead of the familiar headline 'Flash Missing: Vanishes in Crisis', the new headline was some dull article Eobard couldn't have cared less about if it wasn't for the fact that it wasn't meant to be there. He took a shaky breath, trying to quell his panic, and scrubbed his face with both hands.

"Run a complete search. Show any references to The Flash." Eobard said slowly, his chest suddenly very tight.

Fortunately, several smaller articles about The Flash dotted the space in front of him and Eobard regained the ability to breathe, bracing himself on the dais in front of him as he examined them closely. The future was...mostly in tact, it seemed. For now.

"Bring up my log, Gideon." Eobard said finally, taking a step back from the pedestal and crossing his arms, trying to regain some semblance of composure.

"Certainly." Gideon said and the list of entries appeared instantaneously. "Go ahead, Doctor."

"New entry: it has now been…" Eobard paused, looking at his watch. "372 days since lightning struck. Subject has brought an infant to the past from the distant future without considering how that could impact said future. This is, admittedly, unsurprising given his impulsivity but, nevertheless, concerning. At present, Subject remains The Flash and I have yet to experience any potential negative side effects as a result, but it has only been three hours since the infant's arrival. I expect more challenges to arise the longer he remains here."

Eobard paused, running a hand through his hair. This damned baby  - his younger self - threatened to unravel everything he had meticulously planned, everything he had worked for for the last 15 years. He exhaled a shaky breath, but the tension didn't leave his body. He couldn't afford to be complacent. The presence of this infant was a ticking time bomb and he had to neutralize it before it exploded.

"Gideon," Eobard said again, interrupting his log. "Show all references to Eobard Thawne."

"Zero references to Eobard Thawne." Gideon said, and Eobard felt the panic begin to seep in again.

"Show any references to The Reverse Flash." Eobard demanded.

"Zero references." Gideon repeated.

"Look again."

"Zero references." Gideon said once more.

"Look again." Eobard growled, his frustration and fear boiling over.

"I've searched 3,452 times, Dr. Wells. There's nothing."

Eobard took a deep breath to ground himself. He couldn't afford to lose control now, not when everything was so precarious, but the knowledge that he could disappear at any moment was a very known, very real threat that left him mentally spiraling. He couldn't afford to panic. He had to maintain control. The baby was a threat, yes, but he could handle it. There was no other choice.

"Log entry continued," Eobard said, turning back to the holographic interface. "In order to return the timeline to its intended state, I will maintain close observation of Subject's interactions with the infant, assess and evaluate potential threats to the timeline, and take all necessary actions to mitigate the inevitable changes. Subject must not be allowed to be alone with the infant for any length of time."

Eobard turned away, returning to the wheelchair and making his way out of the room. He couldn't let this infant destroy everything he'd worked for. He had come too far, sacrificed too much. He would find a way to fix this. He had to.

[moremaybank]

Hey love i have a request for JJ Maybank or Klaus. him chearing his girl up (with sex) after her football team lost their game. My country lost the first game on the world cup today and I would just need any of them with me rn. thank u<3

SCORED — j.m

pairing jj maybank x fem!reader

summary jj cheers you up after your favourite football team loses their first game in the world cup.

warnings 18+, unprotected sex, oral sex (f. receiving), fingering, breeding kink, praise kink, language

author's note ik argentina won the world cup (period), but this was requested before they did so yeah. not proofread because i've been drinking 💀

jj masterlist

you sighed, plopping down onto your bed face first. you were enthusiastic mere hours ago, hoping and praying that your team would go far during the world cup. however, much to your dismay, things hadn't exactly gone to plan. all your excitement had vanished, leaving you in a puddle of misery and disappointment.

jj had heard you screaming at the tv from downstairs, so when he looked over at you ad your mopey expression from his side of the bed, he wasn't surprised. "baby, i know you're upset that argentina lost, but it was just one game. they can still take the whole thing," he said as he rubbed your back, striving to ease your heartache.

"i know, but that doesn't mean i don't get to feel their loss with them. it hurts," you replied, voice muffled thanks to the comforter you've smushed your face against.

"would one of my famous back massages make you feel better?"

you lifted your face up from the bed, and your eyes landed on jj's hopeful smile. damn him and his goddamn dimple.

"yeah."

his grin widened, and he straddled your back to work on your tense muscles.

shoving the hem of your shirt up to your shoulder blades, his hands instantly got to work, kneading and massaging your back. if witchcraft existed, it would be in the form of jj's magical hands. they knew your body as well as his own; what made you tick, what relieved your tension, and what actions could leave you at his mercy. he took pride in how he knew you inside out.

as he continued to work through the knots in your back, soft little moans would tumble past your lips, and it was becoming difficult to concentrate. every noise you made echoed in his mind and brought up memories of past moments of passion shared between you two. jj tried to push his thoughts to the back of his mind, but to no avail. all he could think about was having you in whatever position he wanted while he performed unspeakable acts on you.

so caught up in his own head, jj failed to notice that his cock was getting harder and harder as the seconds passed. it was hard — no pun intended — not to detect. it was unavoidable; he needed you. needed to hear you calling out his name as his cock slammed into you over and over, legs trembling as you clung onto him like your life depended on it.

jj dropped his head, starting to leave wet kisses up the outline of your spine. once he was close enough, he kissed the shell of your ear.

"i don't think i'm the only one who needs help feeling better, j. i can feel how hard you are for me," you whispered, your fingers threading through his hair behind you. "maybe we can help each other?"

"fuck yeah," he breathed in response, moving closer to your face so he could kiss you. your lips touched, electricity coursing between your mouths as you expressed your need for each other with your lips. jj bit down on your bottom lip, tugging at it and drawing another one of those heaven-sent moans from you.

you pulled away, nudging him off you so you could turn over. "why are you still wearing these?" you questioned, fingers toying with his clothes. "take 'em off, handsome."

"you first," he smirked teasingly before obliging and stripping his shirt and shorts off. you also removed your clothes and laid back on the bed as you waited for jj to climb over you.

once he did, his lips found yours again, as one of his hands trailed down your body. he rubbed circles over your panty-clad clit, eliciting a whine from you.

"i love how fucking responsive you are. all it takes is the smallest touch to make you a mess for me," he taunts, rubbing harshly as your hips met his movements. the material separating you from his touch was becoming a nuisance, and you moved his hand to discard them from your body. jj beat you to it, taking the hem between his teeth and dragging the panties down your legs slowly.

the slick seeping from your pussy glistened thanks to the sunlight flowing into the room from the window, and jj visibly salivated as he licked his lips. "my favourite fucking meal," he rasped, before delving in.

his lips instantly wrapped around your clit, knowing that clitoral stimulation was what pushed you over the edge. he didn't feel like teasing you today; he just wanted you to forget about your sorrows and make you feel the best you ever had at his hands. you mewled when his tongue slathered around your sensitive bundle of nerves, pushing it back and forth. he then dragged his tongue down to your entrance, craving the taste of you. "so sweet. always so fucking sweet."

pulling back, he looked up at you. "you wanna taste yourself, pretty girl?"

you nodded furiously in response, loving the way he was speaking to you. his words were just as magical as his hands; they could push you to the brink alone if they wanted to.

jj pushed his index and middle finger into you, thrusting and curling upward as he leaned up to kiss you. your tongues collided as you kissed, and you could taste a bit of yourself in his mouth. the filthy action drove you crazy, and your walls clamped down around his digits.

"shit, j. so close already, gonna come," you whined, head thrown back as jj's lips found your neck. his teeth scraped at your collarbone, and his hand picked up the pace, pushing you over the edge as you reached your first orgasm. you came loudly, trembling as your high coursed through your body.

once you came down, your finger hooked itself in his shark tooth necklace, and you pulled his lips to yours. your free hand slid down his torso, feeling every ridge and dip of his abs before you reached his clothed cock. you snuck your hand in, fingers circling around his length as you stroked him gently. he groaned into your mouth, hips subconsciously moving closer to your touch.

"you're gonna take every inch of me, yeah? your pretty little pussy gonna swallow me whole and keep me inside?"

"yes, baby. need you buried all the way inside me," you begged, giving him the pout he always fails to hold out against.

he grinned, moving your hand from his briefs so he could strip them off. he threw them on the floor carelessly before looking back to you. "do me a favour?"

"anything, j," you whispered, the words true to your heart.

"roll over and put this pillow under your hips for me," he responded, handing you one of your pillows. you nodded, doing as he said. he then climbed back on top of you, straddling the back of your thighs with the tip of his cock brushing against your wet core. he sucked in a breath at the light contact, cock twitching with want. he pushed inside slowly, one hand guiding himself inside and the other resting on your hip. you both simultaneously let out a satisfied moan, feeling the relief quell the ache that burned inside you both.

jj leaned his upper body against your back, his forearms resting on the mattress on either side of you, caging you in. he began to thrust his hips slowly, his cock pushing into you deep with each movement. the position he ordered you into, accompanied by the pillow placed under your hips, had you seeing stars with every plunge of his length. he rocked into you so deeply that it knocked every unrelated thought out of your brain. all you could focus on was how he was making you feel.

"love how good for me you are, pretty girl. my good girl always behaves for me. you love pleasing me, don't you?"

"yes, baby. i'd do anything to make you happy," you replied, clutching onto the sheets beneath you. "love being your little toy and getting to please you."

"love you so fucking much, princess. love how you let me fuck you whenever i want. you're so fucking good for me; make me so fucking proud, baby. you and your tight little pussy," he rasped, hips beginning to rock into you a bit faster.

your walls clenched around him as his filthy words stroked your ego and his equally filthy movements stroked your g-spot just right. you were putty in his hands, biting down on the pillow in front of your face as you whimpered. you never wanted jj to be anywhere else. you wanted him inside you, every minute of every day for the rest of your life.

"c'mon, baby. come for me. i'm right here, i'm not going anywhere," jj encouraged as he left open-mouthed kisses on your shoulder blades, sucking soft red hues into your skin.

"wanna come with you, j. need to feel you twitch inside me and fill me up," you whined, your hand wrapping around one of his biceps as you let him fuck into you faster.

"i'm close, baby. go ahead, make daddy proud and come with me," he said, chasing both of your highs with each thrust of his hips.

"fuck, right there, j. shit."

you squealed as jj let out a loud groan, the two of you reaching your highs together. his hips stuttered while he kept thrusting inside of you, spurring you on as you came. your cunt squeezed him with a vice grip as if it wanted to cage him in.

"goddamn," jj rasped, collapsing onto your back as you both panted, coming down from your climaxes, "that was perfect. you're perfect." he mustered up his energy, rolling off of you. his fingers swiped some hair out of your face as he smirked at you.

your brows furrowed. "what?" you questioned, knowing he was up to something.

"i know your team lost, pretty girl, but you still scored," he replied with a wink, and all you could do was let out a laugh.

"you're an idiot."

jj tag list (join here!): @maybankslover @skydisneylover @kittyqrt @v-velvetykisscs

[l3xdrigo]

Since it's my birthday today and whatnot, this is gonna be a special post :D. I'm gonna show some drabbles and short stories that I've been wanting to share for a while so enjoy.

(also thank you to that one moot(@acesw) that has probably read most of these already and has suffered through my ramblings, appreciate you a lot<3)

(Most of these are Vernetto and Vertin-centric cuz they've been taking over my mind for months)

"Familiar"

It's over, the fight between the storm and Manus, it was all over. Many are bloodied, injured and tired yet cheered for their victory. Just outside the Manus's hide out was a new world that will greet them, time will no longer move backwards yet only forward. Opening the door, many arcanist and some humans alike rushes out, yet a figure stood still in front of the open door. What a familiar sight, someone steps outside and looks back and holds out their hand "Timekeeper.. It's okay now, we won, let's go and see the outside world together. Where we are all free" Vertin gave a smile, a somber smile, "I would love that.. but unfortunately I can't join you.."

A click inside the darkness of the building

" I'm sorry Sonetto, enjoy your freedom"

A loud bang echoed into the walls.

doesn't this feel so familiar for you, little puppy.

Sonetto was in a state of shock, her mind not processing what happened as the blood seeped out and spread. "Sonetto! What are you standing there for, come get Vertin and come over here" Lilya was the one who shouted, being meters away from them but her voice still reached her ears. Then, the whole situation sinked in... Sonetto dropped to her knees as it seemed all the strength left in her body was gone.

The hound couldn't protect her, it's bellwether.

(Or the foundation didn't need their timekeeper anymore, so time to let her rest)

"Aftermath"

The last drop of rain had risen and the sun began to rise, the storm was over. Bodies gone and only clothing was left, the Manus's dark ink-like substance stained the concrete ground. After grueling hours and days of fighting, it was all over, time is moving forward again, both sides had an abundance of followers and martyrs fighting for two seperate cause, they all fought rigorously yet only one remained.

Vertin on her knees stayed there, unable to move as fatigue and the strain of injuries took a toll, but also loneliness. She fought side by side with her team, her family, her herd but she was the only one remaining. Sotheby, Lilya,Regulus, Ms. Druvis, Mr. Apple.. Sonetto, they were all gone, her suitcase was destroyed, the arcanist and humans she's grown accustomed to were also gone. Was it worth it? For the mission of returning to the present but to lose everything to the past.

"One man shall fall and one man shall live to bear the consequences of thy sins" were the last words that left Arcana; the mission is over, take off your hat and face the scene in front, repent and walk to the light, a new tomorrow awaits you, Vertin.

("Are we all alone once again"- The Gleaming)

"Longing"

Sonetto was walking through the halls, passing staff members and managers and exchanging greetings. She was called to get on set today as they needed to record a new scene for the show "Reverse 1999"

Being a part of this project has been great, she's met a lot of directors and producers with a platter of amazing ideas, actors who have made some show-stopping scenes with their talents and.. as she opens the door, there she is. Vertin, with her ash-gray hair tied up in a messy bun, wearing her outfit as the Timekeeper of the show, just minus the coat, talking with one of the managers, smiling and giggling at times as they both talk about how a recent interview went. Oh how gorgeous she was, even after all these years, Vertin was still the one who holds Sonetto's heart captive and it's both a heart warming yet painful feeling.

Both of them have been friends since they were 4, it took Sonetto to grow fond of Vertin as she's been known to be quite a troublemaker but eventually she warmed up to her antics, even if she had to get her out of them most of the time. They both shared a passion for arts and literature, they were interested in theater and would watch them as their bond grew more and more throughout the years. Those times had to end however, as Sonetto flew abroad for college, leaving Vertin and the rest of her friends behind. She's gotten busy and due to that, both her and Vertin have somewhat drifted away from each other, the regret is still eating her even today, to be able to go back in time and fix that mistake. Now, Vertin has grown into an amazing actress and also has made a lot of new friends, she's met some of them, like a girl named Schneider, a bit of a flirt but she's great. There were times where she has gotten a bit envious of their bond, to be able to be so close to Vertin and not feel like her airways collapsed when she tried to utter a word.

She's here now but the distance still feels far, funny isn't it, she thought, 'how are characters we play fight against the reversal of time yet all I want is to go back and experience the past we had before' Sonetto could only sigh deeply, taking one last glance before one of the staff had called her, maybe she wasn't so different from the character she plays.

(Or maybe it wasn't just the lack of communication but another event that left them distant; actor au)

"How the moon stares at the sun"

Vertin stared at Sonetto as she smiles in the sunlight, gently reaching out to a butterfly. Sonetto looked ethereal, her orange hair slightly flowing in the wind, green eyes almost shining as brightly as the sun. Vertin knew how beautiful Sonetto was before ever since they were children of the foundation but right now really proved that thought a hundred times more. Warmth spreading to her cheeks as she just stared at her for what felt like an eternity but the moment Sonetto looked back at her, she immediately hid behind the safety of her hat.

"Timekeeper, are you alright?"

"... yes Sonetto, I am fine"

Sonetto tilted her head a bit, like a curious puppy who's also worried. It took a while for the "stoic" timekeeper to regain her composure again, though still feeling her heart beating like a drum.

"Let's go back shall we, Sonetto"

"Of course timekeeper!"

Sonetto happily followed as Vertin gave a small smile;the moon cannot shine without its sun.

(Look, lesbians)

"Reversed"

Vertin fought against forget me not and some manus followers, both are in equal battle but Fmn has the upper hand, catching Vertin off guard and using an attack that exploded a chunk of the right side of her head to bits. Her body falls to the ground, blood seeping almost immediately as in Fmn eyes, he won, she's dead, there's no way she could get up now, the deep wounds of the fight and a good chunk of her head and skull destroyed, she's dead. They retreat as the storm is here, leaving the timekeeper's body to rot.

As raindrops rise from the ground, it hits the corpse, but instead of just rising to the top, some of the raindrops were starting to affect the body. Vertin is immune to the storm's effects, but it seems that some part of that was false. Colorful liquid like substance starts to form on the sounds and the side of her head, being reversed to their original state, slowly but surely. Reversing the atoms and nerves and bringing life to her once more. She awoke again after a while, breathing heavily as the storm do it's job. Slightly touching the side of her head that was originally exploded, it still feels like liquid but she can feel some part of the bones restoring, it's best not to touch it as it actually quite hurts. Slowly getting up, and seeing the Manus nowhere to be found, she needs to head back to her team, she's worried that the Manus might try to do something.

Fmn attacks were getting stronger as the timekeeper squad casted incantation after incantation, just when Forget me not was going to land a tremendous attack, a strong attack from behind the head was enough to knock him out. The group looked at the source of the attack and spotted a familiar blue hat, Vertin stood there, clothes bloodied and parts of her body weirdly had clusters of colorful liquid. They stared for a moment, not really knowing how to process.

"I'm guessing you would like to know what happened?"

"I- YES WE WOULD LIKE TO KNOW"

Regulus quickly answered back, Vertin internally sighed, this is going to be a long explanation.

(Vertin being able to heal in the storm was an interesting idea I've had)

"Clinging onto a thread"

As Vertin, Regulus, Sonetto, Mr. Apple and lilya are walking to Madam Z's office after getting back from the island and that god-forsaken first field mission, Vertin speaks up.

"Umm...Regulus, you know it's okay to let go of me now right? "

Regulus could be seen clinging onto Vertin's left arm and Mr. Apple was holding onto a small part of Vertin's hat, she shook her head.

"Nah mate, from the amount of bull crap we just went through, I'm not letting you go. And besides, I'm not the only one clinging to you"

At her right, Sonetto could also be seen clutching at her arm, looking somewhat calm but the way she firmly holds her arm says otherwise.

Vertin just stays silent for a while, and continues to walk. It would be pretty hypocritical of her to make them let go, as she herself has been holding Lilya's hand, the eagle has been guiding them back the entire time.

(It's crazy to think that the island thing was their first-field mission)

"Can you please stop taking their timekeeper away every 5 minutes"

The timekeeper squad was in Madam Z's room, currently talking about some important matters as there was a knock on the door, Madam Z gave the permission to enter as a foundation staff walked into the room.

"excuse me Madam Z, we need to take the Timekeeper for a few moments to evaluate some reports about the recent storm."

The staff was immediately bombarded with questions.

Regulus: You're taking her already?? When will she come back?

Foundation staff: in maybe a few hours

Lilya: And how long are those "few" hours?

Foundation staff: it is estimated to be around 1 or 2 if the evaluation goes smoothly

Sotheby: You're not going to bring her anywhere else right?

Foundation staff: of course not, just to the research Center.

Druvis: After the evaluation, is there anything else she would do after?

Foundation staff: umm,, it depends but I'm certain that it's only an evaluation, nothing more after that.

The foundation staff looks at Madam Z if she can take the timekeeper who's been standing next to the foundation staff and seemingly waiting patiently.

"Just let her take her leave as soon as the evaluation is over, but other than that, yes the both of you may be excused."

The two left the room and it felt very awkward. Vertin apologized for what happened, telling the poor staff that they were just worried about her after the recent events, the staff brushed it off, saying that it's fine. Though deep inside it was incredibly scary, even the Apple seemed intimidating.

(Can we please stop taking their timekeeper away, they need her as much as she needs them🥹)

"Sleeping in"

Vertin slowly woke up, the fresh sunlight hitting here skin through the windowsill of her room. It's been a few days since the disastrous mission that her team just went through, being put on break as all recovers. Something was missing, or she should say someone, getting up groggily, she drags her body out of bed and outside her room. After walking in the suitcase for a bit, she spots what she was missing, Sonetto.

She spotted her right away and was about to greet her when Vertin wrapped her arms around her waist, bringing her to a hug. Sonetto lets out a small squeak from the unexpected action but quickly recovers and wraps her arms around her as well. "Are you still tired? " the timekeeper only let out a small hum as a response, the two have gotten closer since that mission, finding it hard when both were seperated, so the two prompted to sleep in together, not like both of them minded it(Sonetto was a flustered mess at first but hey, she's fine) . Finding comfort and solace with one another, through their aching pains and injuries, both have enjoyed each other's company and warmth.

Sonetto looks at one of the clocks for the time, it still seems too early for the two of them to be up, the rest of their team still asleep. "It seems a bit too early for you to be up timekeeper, would you like to head back to bed?" Earning another hum from the timekeeper, both make their way back to the bedroom. Maybe sleeping in wouldn't be so bad, they are on break after all.

(They deserve some eepy and cuddles. Again, lesbians)

(Idk if I'll add more to this later but damn this took a while)

[ayyy-pee]

𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒍𝒐𝒈𝒖𝒆: 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑫𝒂𝒚 𝑾𝒆 𝑴𝒆𝒕

Discord 18+ - Twitter - JJK Masterlist

Pairing: Choso x f! Reader

Summary: Every summer, he's a little taller. Every summer, his voice is a little deeper, a little richer. Every summer he's more handsome. And as you both grow together, so does your love.

A story of love blooming between two individuals over many, many summers.

Chapter Warnings: **Depictions of Drowning** - read with caution

Choso Art By: NC9__

AN: I've been itching to write a Choso only fic lately and I've had this summertime romance fic in my head for the last few days that I thought he'd be good in! It'll be a childhood friends to lovers shortfic (like five chapters) and I hope you all enjoy! Here's the prologue!

**Also while not all chapters contain adult content, the themes of this story are targeted towards adults, so minors DNI please.

You were nine years old when you laid eyes on the ocean for the first time. 

You remember it clear as day, your parents' sudden turn of fortune allowing them to splurge on more luxurious things. Suddenly you were gifted with new toys, new clothes and shoes, new furniture in your home. And your parents…well, they decided to purchase a beach house for vacations. So fun. So exciting. So new. You’d never gone on family vacations before unless it was to visit your grandparents. That was boring. But this…this was something new and shiny and wonderful.

You’d never been so excited to get in the car and go, your mouth moving a mile a minute as you bombarded your poor mother with questions along the way. After many hours of curling up in the car for naps, many pit stops and what seemed like an entire day to your young mind, you finally arrive at your new vacation home. 

Your dad unloads all of your bags as you bounce around the house. It’s homey, comfortable, already furnished and most importantly, you can see the ocean from your living room windows. You watch the waves roll in one after another, barely able to contain your excitement. You beg your parents to take you to the beach, to let you see the ocean as close as you can. After some negotiating (unpacking your bag and a quick snack), your mother rushes you off to the beach, leaving your father to inspect the rest of the house.

“We’ll have a girls day. Just you and me,” your mother beams, holding your hand tight as you descend the stairs from the pier.

There is so much to take in here: seagulls screeching in the distance, the crashing of waves rolling into each other, jet skis zipping past, all new sounds filling your little ears. The graininess of the sand between your toes, the warmth and softness as it runs through your fingers. An hour later, after many sandcastles and moats have been built, you stand where the sand meets the ocean, barefoot with wide eyes drinking in the vast amount of water ahead of you. The soft foam of the rolling water kisses the tips of your toes before crawling back out to sea. 

Your mother has gone to get you both drinks at the boardwalk, the sun finally beginning to drain you both. Before leaving, she made you promise to stay seated under the beach umbrella until she gets back. Any other day, you would listen. You really would. You’d stay glued to your spot, waiting patiently for your mother to return. But this is your first time at the beach. Of course you want to know more about this massive wonder only a few steps away. So your tiny feet inch forward. 

The sudden chill of the water makes you gasp in shock when you feel how much colder it is in contrast to the scorching sand on your feet just seconds prior. It takes you a moment to adjust, shivering slightly as you wade forward. The water soon reaches above your knees, the push and pull of the current sending more shivers up your body as the cold reaches higher and higher. The current pulls and you lose your footing for the briefest of seconds before it pushes you back to standing. You giggle, deciding you love the ocean more than you’d thought.

You wish you knew how to swim. You think you’d swim all the way to where the sky meets the ocean if you could. The horizon. That’s what you remember your mother calling it just earlier when you’d arrived. You decide you’ll ask your mother for lessons when she gets back. But for now, you’ll only go out until the water reaches your waist. That won’t be too bad. You push forward, your heart pounding happily as your little mind rapidly fires off questions you hope to soon have answers to. 

I wonder how much water is in the ocean?

Can I drink it?

What’s that smell?

Why is wet sand so squishy?

What if there’s mermaids?

Or what if there’s a shark?

All of your thoughts are racing through your head so fast, you don’t realize you’re inching further and further, deeper and deeper into the waters. Eyes locked on the horizon, you fail to notice how deep you’ve gone…until your footing is lost beneath you. You feel yourself drop, feet hitting soft sand, your face barely above water enough to breathe but you launch yourself up, gasping in an attempt to get as much air as you can. And then you’re down again, feet kicking, toes pointed to the point of cramping, desperately trying to find the ground again and only sinking further. A dark shadow rises to loom over and you peer up just in time to let out a shrill cry as a wave comes crashing down on you not a second later. 

The first thing you feel is frozen, the sudden iciness of the deep waters shocking you to the point you can’t move. You try to inhale, only resulting in your lungs being filled with fluids. But it’s enough to make you move, your arms and legs thrashing wildly as you try to resurface to no avail. 

You peer up again. The reflection of the sky above waves tauntingly at you, teasing you by being just within arms reach, and still you are unable to get to it. You can just barely make out the rays of sun over the surface of the water, your eyes burning with an intensity you’ve never experienced before in your nine short years on this earth. You wave your arms, kick your legs, try your hardest to get closer to those rays only to feel yourself sinking lower, getting further.

Your lungs are on fire, ears throbbing with the roaring whoosh of water as the ocean pounds against your eardrums relentlessly. You squeeze your eyes shut tight, not even able to enjoy the relief it brings your eyes as you stupidly try to breathe again. You can’t even help it. Your body is doing what it knows to do, what it needs to survive. 

And you, at the tender age of nine, soon begin to realize that even as your body fights, your chances of survival are minimal.

You wish you knew how to swim.

Your head hurts, the pain beginning to seep into your bones as your limbs tingle. Everything hurts as the undercurrent of the waves tosses you back and forth, rolls and twists your body painfully. But more than anything, your heart hurts as your mothers face comes to mind. 

The disappointment and fear she’ll surely feel when she comes back and sees you’ve moved from your place under the umbrella. That you broke your promise to her and now you’re nowhere to be seen. 

You see your dad’s face, twisted with agony when he gets the news. 

Even as your nine year old heart comes to terms with your impending demise, you can only wonder if your mom will be angry with you. You hope she won’t be. You hope she’ll know how sorry you are. That you should have listened. You should have stayed.

You wish you knew how to swim.

The burning in your lungs subsides. The muffled noise of breaking waves fades. And your mind stops racing. Your mind just…stops altogether. There are no thoughts lingering in your head, no more fear, no more pain. You’re just there, floating in the abyss. 

And then you feel it, a lifeline hooking itself quite literally to your shirt, yanking you up and out of the depths below and guiding you roughly to the surface as the ocean tries to drag you back. You feel the rays of the sun warm your skin again, the heat radiating all the way to the marrow of your bones. The gusts of wind slapping against your face quite literally revive you; a visceral cough racking through your body. It’s disgusting, putrid, all the salt water stinging both your throat and your nostrils as you retch, gag and expel the remnants from your body.

You feel your back gently hit the sand, someone’s small hands holding your face as they hover over you. You can’t see straight, your vision blurring as you squeeze your eyes open and shut to rid yourself of the salt water still assaulting your corneas. 

Whoever is holding you is talking, but it’s muffled. You can barely make out anything they’re saying. They’re holding your hand, pressing their ear against your nose, talking to you and you can just make out a “someone’s coming to help you”. Then there’s another person crouching next to you. They grab you, pulling you to them, holding you so tight you almost feel like you’re underwater again. And it takes no time at all for you to realize it’s your mother: the familiar warmth of her body, a heartbeat you’ve known since before birth. There’s no doubt in your mind it’s her. She’s not angry with you like you thought she’d be but you can hear the fear in her trembling voice when she speaks to the person you assume saved you.

Your mother swipes at your eyes and your vision clears, your gaze focusing only on her. Then she dips her fingers into your ears and you feel the water spill from them, her voice becoming clearer. Next to you, the person who pulled you from the water speaks, voice soft as they ask if you’re alright.

You tilt your head from your mothers chest to give a tiny nod. With clear eyes, you can finally see their face. It’s just a boy, a kid maybe your age or a year older. He’s got wide brown eyes that stare straight into yours as he inches closer to you and your mother. His dark hair is wild and unkempt, tied up in two pigtails. Even wet, they poke out every which way. 

“You almost died,” he gasps, not bothering to filter himself. “You gotta pay attention out there!”

“You saved her?” Your mother asks, and you can hear the shakiness in her voice still. The little boy nods.

“Yep! Me and my brothers were playing over there–” he points off to the side where two younger boys and a small baby sit under a large umbrella. 

“What’s your name?” Your mother questions.

“Choso,” the boy answers with a wide grin. He’s got a large gap where one of his front teeth should be and it makes you smile. “I take care of my brothers when we come to the beach, so I’m always watching to make sure they don’t get hurt. I saw a wave take her under so I went to help and–”

He’s cut off by your mother suddenly yanking him into her embrace, squeezing you two together tightly. “Thank you,” your mother sobs into his hair. “Thank you so much. You could’ve died, too. You have to be careful, too. Both of you. You have to be careful.”

She holds him and you to her chest, sobbing in joy and relief that you are both okay, both safe. You feel strange, your mom cradling you in one arm and this stranger you just met two minutes ago in the other. But your eyes find Choso and he doesn’t seem to be sharing the same sentiment. He looks shy, embarrassed, his cheeks a bright crimson as your mom continuously thanks him for saving you, calls him your guardian angel.

His gaze meets yours, brown eyes swimming with what you think are tears and he gives you a shy smile that you just as shyly return. You know from that moment that you will be seeing Choso again. And though the day did not turn out as expected, when you crawl into bed that night and replay the events of the day, you think the day turned out even better. 

You think back to the look on Choso’s face when your mother held him, thanking him profusely. She wanted to meet his parents to thank them as well, and was surprised to know that his mother and father were not around much and so the brothers entertained themselves for the most part. This wouldn’t do, so your mother took him and his brothers home after treating them to dinner. You think about the tender smile Choso gifted you with when you agreed to come back to the pier to play with him and his brothers later in the week. Yes, you could say today was a good day. And you were hoping to have many more with Choso.

You were nine years old when you laid eyes on the ocean for the first time.

And you’d almost died.

But you were also nine years old when you were saved from that same ocean. 

And you laid eyes on the love of your life for the first time.