#IVE MISSED U TOO LOV

[intertexts]

tell me more about dakota cole gon hunter hunter I literally know. nothing abt that anime give me ur propaganda. ramble 2 me forever and ever I wanna KNOW

I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE IN FOR!!!!!!

god. okay. hunter x hunter is a shonen manga by yoshihiro togashi that's been in serialization since '98 & has had two separate anime adaptions. i'm gonna be talking abt the '11 adaption, since that's the one ive been watching! (sidenote: started hxh because of the podcast media club plus which is easily one of my favorite podcasts everrr incredibly good analysis has really affected the way i think about media analysis & criticism extremely fucking fun awesome dynamics btwn folks who are 1) very well known for having extremely good media opinions & 2) great friends who have been friends for a long time & just a delight to listen to. its a great time regardless of whether u r watching the show or not highly recommend if u ever need a new work or commute podcast etc) also disclaimer that i'm only on episode 62 of the show. so.

anyway. the hxh plot:

i will not get into the plot much because it's not as important for the dakota gon isms. but its this. ^!!

so hxh is, overall, a homage to and deconstruction of its genre tropes. togashi very much loves and enjoys a ton of the tropes he's playing with and very obviously delights in subverting just as many of them. it balances these wildly disparate tones of classic, bright candy colored shonen magical worlds and powers and big fights with genuine, seriously-considered violence, cruelty, sinister power structures and all the other heavy consequences of splashy ultraviolence. [RINGS THE PD BELL!!!] the whiplash is ridiculous sometimes-- the ease with which the show cuts from the last survivor of a genocide (kind, reasonable, soft-spoken) turning to self-destructive revenge that is quite literally destroying him from the inside out, taking an immense toll on him and his relationships with the people he loves, becoming a murderer in cold blood (& of course we spend time with the man he murders beforehand, and he's fucking awful, but also human, and has friends and shit, & it's very clear that this is something dreadful and not just a cool fight)-- to like, the two twelve-year-old main characters concocting a fucking ridiculous scheme to corner the antiques market so they get a billion dollars to buy a viddy game & one of the twelve year olds faces turns into a little >:3 kitty face whenever hes doing something sneaky & there's some cartoon ass shopkeeper scamming them, is wild. and neither of them are the "correct tone," right? the whole thing is a balance between the modes & takes them both seriously & at their own value. [RINGS THE PD BELL] so like. literally since a couple episodes into prime defenders ive been like oh, yeah, this tracks, i'm not bothered by the constant juxtaposition of stupid ass bits with genuinely serious moments, this is obviously influenced by hxh. which, like, i still can't say if that was intentional or not. but hxh is one of The manga of all time & was & still is incredibly influential (sasuke of sasuke fame is a knockoff of a hxh character btw), so i have no doubt that it was an ingredient in the mix somehow!

anyway. gon, who is literally dakota, is the protag! hes the little boy who set off to find out whats so great about cigarettes :) he is a kid who was raised by his aunt who he has a complicated relationship with after his mother was killed and his father disappeared, and he grew up in the woods and is very very strong and fast and good at fighting because he grew up in the woods!! fucking feral little creature boy who fights with a fishing rod and talks to animals and has an incredible sense of smell. gon does some shit, leaves the island, makes some friends, gets groomed by a creepy fucking pedophile which he thinks is fine, gets brutally tortured for a very very uncomfortably long time, which he thinks is fine, becomes a hunter (which is great he has awesome lines of credit now!) it's still unclear what a hunter is or does, but they have lots of power and can do pretty much whatever they want. anyway, he wants to be the best and the strongest and he loves fighting for fun, for the sake of fighting and being good at what he does!!!! and he also wants to find his dad. and definitely doesn't have any unresolved issues from the fact that his mom is dead its fine he doesn't even want to know anything about her its chill and also his dad's so cool so whatever he was doing was for sure more important than him so it doesn't matter that he abandoned him! the crux of gon as a character is that he is very silly and often kind and very much a kid, and he does not fucking care what happens to himself. he is fine with getting the shit beaten out of him by people twice his age he is cheerfully oblivious to and makes excuses for almost every single adult taking advantage of him or being just awful to him, when it's very obvious in the narrative that it is bad and not good, he's self-destructively reckless and impulsive and fixated on what he thinks is good and right and also on becoming the best and strongest even if he burns out fast and he loves his friends so so so much. and simultaneously also he's a sillygoofy kid who does dumb shit with his best friend ever (gay) n worries about his pals n stuff. its okay if he burns himself out and gets himself hospitalized for months its okay if people hurt him and take advantage of him and get off on the idea of killing him but its NOT ok if his friends even THINK about taking a risk like that >:(( head in hands. anyway. yeah. fun silly adventures strange beasts and foreign lands and wild cartoon shenanigans and very explicit horror and gore!! with often brutal and terrible consequences that leave you feeling kind of sick!!! where have i heard that before!!!!!!!!!!

[giiants]

@danhang said: [ palm kiss ] / not sure if you're still accepting these and/or wanna write ushioi but < 3 (the intimacy of hands) (accepting always)

Oikawa Tooru is a complicated person. Wakatoshi knew that then, and he still knows that now. If you ask him, it is not just a question of personalities being too different to be compatible - misunderstandings and disagreements are an obstacle he believes they have cleared for a while now... or at least, figured out that they wouldn't be an irremediable poison in the beginnings and foundations of what they had decided to try and build together. The fact that the two of them clash like mismatched colours that only make sense once you begin to pay attention to the details and nuances is a fact, and it is sometimes complicated to handle, but it is not a complicated concept in and of itself.

Oikawa Tooru is a complicated person, by virtue of the many folds and nooks and crannies of the tapestry of his entire being; full of contradictions and unpredictable twists and turns. It is what makes Tooru, Tooru -- it is why Wakatoshi could never understand him in highschool, and it is why Wakatoshi ended up ensnared, caught in the irresistible storm brewing behind the charming smile and carefree demeanour. A complicated person, foils and all; where he would define himself as a simple, straightforward one. Too simple, maybe, at times, to understand in time what goes on in his boyfriend's (a thought that still catches him by surprise, from time to time). Wakatoshi misses certain signs, certain steps he does not realise he is meant to take - and only realises it once Tooru's mood begins to shift and sour.

Like now. Explanations had been offered - sort of, not really, Tooru's avoidant gaze pointedly fixed upon the television as they watch a film the title of which Wakatoshi has already forgotten, too busy looking at his partner instead, trying to figure out what he did wrong exactly so he can fix it.

Hm.

After half an hour of the movie playing without him paying it any attention, Wakatoshi lets out a defeated sigh, and slips an arm around Tooru's shoulders, half a truce offered, half an apology, half a silent imploration to stop sulking and let things return to normal. Whatever their new normal is (exciting, enticing, a little scary, a little comfortable). Oikawa Tooru is a complicated person; and maybe it should not be so much of a surprise to feel Tooru begin to relax and sink into his embrace in quiet acceptance. A little pang of relief lodged in his chest, Wakatoshi relaxes too; only to blink a couple of times when he feels a hand taking hold of his, and lips affectionately pressed to his palm.

Ushijima Wakatoshi is a simple person. No matter how complicated things get sometimes -- the unwavering pull Tooru exerts upon his heart will never fail to take precedence over all and every one of their so-called problems. Wakatoshi pulls him closer and presses his lips to his temple, past crown of fluffy brown hair, and nuzzles there just long enough to hear a faint chuckle escape the setter. Ha. Maybe things aren't so complicated, after all.

[ad0rechuu]

★ MILKY WAY. ━━ (000) ASK THEM ANYTHING part 1

💌 ZERO SAYS. i can’t believe that we passed the 30 chapter mark!! thank you to everyone to participated (& for +500 notes), i’ve always wanted to this and it was a lot of fun! i didn’t get as many questions as i wanted but i’m still grateful regardless <3 you can find part 2 here!

❪ # i ❫ : Do you think water is wet? ━━ to smg & jwy

from @seonghwaddict

MINGI : No it’s not… I don’t think it is— maybe it is… huh? I don’t know, I’m impartial

WOOYOUNG : I can make it wet *winks*

❪ # ii ❫ : miss u stinkaboo love youuuu this is taegyu papa trusttttit how u doing love? ━━ to yn

from @tocupid

YN : Alright who payed you huh??? (in case this is real, I’m great now I’m talking to you haha! i miss you too <3)

fatou’s note : Embarrassingly down bad

❪ # iii ❫ : how would you guys react if you are in date with dearest yn but there is someone following you guys, u thought it would be dispatch but it's the other simps? ━━ to psh, csn & smg

from anon

SEONGHWA : Call Hongjoong and snitch, I know they would end up getting involved in MY date someway somehow!

SAN : A date?! With Yn?! I would be too focused on Yn to notice if i’m being honest

MINGI : Pause the date and beat some ass. I would also be super disappointed in hyung, I expect that from San but from him? I would cry (and also call Hongjoong hyung)

❪ # iv ❫ : who do you ship with YN? A. Taegyu. B. San. C. Seonghwa D. Mingi (will you betray his moral loyalty?) ━━ to jyh

from anon

YUNHO : E. I’ll move to a different country and start a new life under a new identity so that none of them kill me for whatever my choice might be (not taegyu that’s for sure, he seems cool but i ship- )

❪ # v ❫ : when is yours and yn's wedding?? also who do u think u can take out in a fight between the boys that also wants your girl's heart? ━━ to syn

from anon

YUNA : I’m so glad you asked! I’m currently planning it but she doesn’t know about it yet. Also I could easily take all of them and I would but Seulgi would take away my Yn privileges anyway about Yn and me! she’s so cute, did you kno-

authors note : Interview cut off because participant had their yn privileges taken away

❪ # vi ❫ : when u and yn finally have ur moment will u be the perfect gentleman or will u let ur dreams take over and just smooch the heck out of yn? ━━ to smg

from anon

MINGI : Me? Meeting Yn? Smooching her?…

authors note : Interview cut short because participant would not stop giggling

❪ # vii ❫ : How does it feel to be the biggest simps on planet earth?? ━━ to psh, csn & smg

from @meginthebuilding27

SEONGHWA : I’m not a simp, its just that i would do anything for her and i think about her all day and i lov- oh…

SAN : Great! really, really fucking great but also my heart feels like its about to burst anytime i see anything related to her… do you think I should see a doctor??

MINGI : I don’t like the fact that I have to share spot! I wanna be number one!

❪ # viii ❫ : How do you keep them in place and don't make them do anything stupid? ━━ to khj

from @meginthebuilding27

HONGJOONG : Have you seen them do anything? I don’t because somehow they are harder to handle than children! But I guess parenting books help, except for Seonghwa, he’s too powerful. oh! And Yn too, I’m glad I have Seulgi to fall back on, she too much to say no to (read: too cute to say no to)

❪ # ix ❫ : we know u love yn and treat her like a baby sister so this q is perfect for you! out of all the boys which one would you choose for n based off what you know of them (then looks teehee) ━━ to ksg

from anon

SEULGI : Aww you’re right, she is my baby! But I just want whoever can makes her the happiest. Regarding the second question you are aware that you are asking a lesbian this right? I don’t think I can answer…

swan’s note : Seonghwa. She likes Park Seonghwa the most, I don’t know why she’s being difficult but it’s mostly because he’s very pretty

❪ # x ❫ : I know u love and care for yn but why don't you help your mans (the 3 lovers) out? (as far as asking if she wants to hang out over her break :3) I know you want to stay unbiased but I gotta know! ━━ to khj

from anon

HONGJOONG : That’s a good question, I honestly did not think of that. Maybe I should do that in the near future?

❪ # xi ❫ : what made u stan yn and whats ur fave piece of star merch that you own ━━ to psh, csn & smg

from anon

SEONGHWA : I love kpop girlgroups, so when I found a new group was debuting I checked out their music and when I watched the Ponzona mv for the choreo it was love on first sight & The album that I bought immediately after and got me my very first photo card of Yn! (It’s still behind my phone)

SAN : I saw a video of her on twitter which was so cute that I just had to know who it was & my Yn chibi plushy, it’s unofficial fan made merch but it’s adorable

MINGI : It was an accident honestly! I was going to check out my friends performance so I joined the line outside the building, nobody questioned me being there so I didn’t know I was at wrong place until I realized that I was standing in line for a fan sign, I thought just leaving would be rude so I stayed and my breath was taken away when I met Yn! & A t-shirt with their logo, it’s fashionable and comfortable as fuck!

❪ # xii ❫ : from 1 to 10, with 10 being the most, how would you rate how much you enjoy the chaos that is currently happening as of ch. 30 ━━ to kys

from anon

YEOSANG : 9, it would be a 10 but they genuinely seemed hurt. I still do enjoy some good chaos though

❪ # xiii ❫ : i badly need some tips on fighting people it can be on the internet or idk face to face but im scared cause i might lose, i just want to fight some constantly annoying people, teach me your ways teacher! ━━ to psh, csn, smg & cjh

from anon

SEONGHWA : Try to not get mad, stay as logical and calm as possible that just makes your opponents seem crazier

SAN : Find something or someone you would argue for no matter what the outcome might be, it’s all about passion

MINGI : Hit ‘em where it hurts!

JONGHO : It’s not a skill that can be taught, you just need to be a true hater.

yuna’s note : Just say Kang YeoSang-

seulgi’s note : Please ignore Yuna’s note!!

❪ # xiv ❫ : from 1 to 10 how jobless did u think hongjoong was when yn first reached out to him ━━ to ksg

from anon

SEULGI : Hongjoong is great and so, so talented! He’s also a college drop out with way too much time on his hands, so it can’t be less that 7 right?

❪ # xv ❫ : are you guys legitimately in love with yn or is it just a fanboy kind of love? ━━ to psh, csn & smg

from anon

authors note : Participants are not allowed to answer this question (yet)

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💌 TAGLIST. @bunnystrm @seongwin @aestheticsluut @meginthebuilding27 @gaebestie @stopeatread @pr1ncessm1ng1 @persphonesorchid @se0nghwaswife @seonghwasslytherin @leeknowsnothing @alixnsuperstxr @bluehwale-main @miriamxsworld @tocupid @rieuvie @sunoo-bby @jcngh0-hq @dudufodd @nikisbf @mrowwww @end0rchans @qtdenks @mintgki @dear-dreamie @leo-seonghwa @evilsailorsenshi @seonghwaddict @choichaeyiul @iw4milf @yunstarz @cvberidiot @tubatu-wari-wari @sunshine1438 @legohwas

[toestalucia]

SHIPPING INFO. answer the following for your muse(s) so people know how shipping works on your blog.

what’s your OTP for your muse(s)?

im easy...........and like too much.......personally ! i prefer akira with the older wizards, ive talked about being in those ship tags ummmm a lot<3 i cant narrow it down further......the twins are an exception but ive been over that in the past. atm i like emu with mafuyu, rui, nene & akito a lot :D theres def more (like honami i think would be cute! and i do like her with tsukasa too, but emu tsukasa besties....), but im like twice her age so i think about that stuff so rarely LOLLLL i thought hard about the rest of my muses but.......?????????? eight/machina....perhaps...........sofia/forte.......yeong/tara......(cagli teehee)

what are you willing to RP when it comes to shipping?

i lov drama. with gran it comes natural cuz welcome to ur 'assuming things w/out asking' and 'thinks way too much into the future where they dont want to settle down' captain. i think akiras the most tender of all of them? and most likely to actually bring up issues? sofia is fun because i think about the event where she Doesnt speak in opposites and micah ends up rly confused........being accepted with her weird speech patterns..... natsume too, either staying at the accepting his weird behavior (jumping, scared expression, running) or having the 'i can see youkai' convo....yknow.....its good...i know tanuma alrdy had a convo like that (UNREAL CONVO i miss it) but yknow. Overall ! anything. mostly. theres some 'ohhh angst' topics im not interested in, so i think most stuff stay on the more lighthearted/loving side tho

how large does the age gap have to be to make it uncomfortable?

feel like a fraud everytime i say that i personally wont write akira with some of the 20yo's cuz im always close to deciding to make akira closer to 30. and then i say i like akira with figaro & oz......the ancient ppl......

are you selective when shipping?

rather than selective i just dont ask ppl........and i have no interest in making relationship calls nor liking them........i want to see where the writing goes first cuz i knoowwww i sometimes say gran would say x but then i write it and y happens yknow LOLLLLLL i'd be open to jumping into stuff on discord or something tho i think ? i think i could jump into romance stuff no problemo then cuz it'd feel slightly separated from here...?! cuz idk but theres something when i open this blog that i......its a very slowburn......if ure willing to spend some months writing so gran can become more accepting of the idea then its go go go. does this make sense. well either way im not sure tbh. grans a bit added difficulty too considering how i deal with their age LOLLL since cygames is pushing 15yo still. which gives me a headache seeing how the summer events etc are explicitly yearly.....i cannot write act3 gran as a teen, not when theres a political engagement with alliah like cmon....i refuse..........but since ure following this blog uve alrdy read this stuff in my rules/about LOL

either way akiras easier with romance. i just dont approach ppl about it. whenever i make that farmsim blog i wanna be more casual with this stuff tbh...T_^ for funsies............write some yearning...

how far do steamy moments have to go before they’re considered NSFW?

not far at all. LMFAOOOOOOOO i use that tag very liberally. its unlikely im writing that stuff anyway....

does one have to ask to ship with you?

:DDDDDDDDDD if i ask u we've probably written for years & years && its starting to reach crush-territory anyway (hello kaitlyn) but man idk what it is....romance is just difficult to write on tomblr rn for me...gran does not make this easier. the issues r endless. can i offer u akira.

how often do you like to ship?

(person whos always in ship tags) (smiley face) (smiley face) (smiley face) can u get into mhyk for akira....or farmsims....................ill ship everything in there.....

are you multiship?

YAAAAAA the idea of having 1 ship on my blog doesnt excite me. even tho i dont write romance atm. LMFAOABKAJD

are you ship obsessed or ship more-or-less?

do u wanna hear about the akifi doujins ive read. or the akifau art where faust puts a flowercrown on akiras head.

what is your favorite ship in your current fandom?

THIS IS HOW DIANTHA/CLARISSE CAN STILL WIN. i am also a sabrina/leona fan. 'did they interact' no but they should. ppl who lost their husband(s). ppl who both should be AT THE CLUB. me/canaria. me/crystal

finally, how does one ship with you?

u like my posts & listen to my ramblings and i twirl my hair and send u more asks and then it just happens. foolproof.

tagged by: @convxction faty my beloved my everything u should do it for ur multi too.... tagging: @shiningstages kait i think u should do this for ur multi and ramble............

[sparksnevadas]

OKAY, Anon was broken for me last night so I couldn’t send my reaction SO now that it’s fixed, I’ve re-read the last 2 chapters and…

AUgHHhHHh, Sparks, Sparks-,,,, I want SO SO bad to get the HA’s ass myself, like at this point with everything that has gone down, I want them defeated

Also, your writing keeps getting to me, I really really love how you thread words to bring out a picture that you can feel without it seeming like the only thing, I really love how much care and thoughts you’ve put into the backstories we’ve got to see so far AND I’m also a sucker for how you deal with knowledge by limiting us to Grian, who is really out of the loop so we get to experience the same ride and just- I’m stuck in my morning lecture giggling like a schoolgirl, and I’m??? Thank you so much for writing this story

-Zeph (sorry for the rambling btw, autism got to me)

Hehehe hi zeph!

Anon was turned off recently ish because I was feeling guilty about not updating and it took me a moment to remember to turn it back oopsies!

Ah, if things were so simple… the HA has uh. Multiple asses. So to say? Idk my dude im typing this very quickly while im on break

The backstories are very important to me!!!! I thought of the main threes background very early on and have just been waiting for the right time to share it. We’re nearing the end of gihasm, so it felt correct now :)

Limited pov is my favorite!!! And i got to try out a bit of scar limited pov too this chapter. Grian is fun because he clearly has a set of rules and expectations for everyone around him, draws little neat boxes around everyone and categorizes them as good or bad, but hes starting to see the human in scar and the human in mumbo and the human in himself, yknow? I thought the way to really cement that was to literally put him in scars shoes Boots and let him *see* the hirt cause by the HA directly. I hope that came across!!!

Anyways, lov u hope youre doing well!! Dont apologize for rambling in my inbox, ive missed it very much during my accidental hiatus

[deartouya]

venus darliiiiingge ^__^ waaa ive beene missing u lots lately so i j wntd 2 stop by n say hie 🧸💖 how r u how was ur wknd ! also so curious 2 hear abt ur wips . . heheh which one r u working on now :o ? oh oh && if ure up 4 i cld i get a littl sneak peek ^u< i hope 2day is sweet 2 u luvvie ,, blowing u a littl kisss thru tha wind :> i lov u !!!!

coco my lovie <3 mrs.kageyama <33 i've missed you too!! seeing lil snippets of you on dash when i'm active is the highlight of my day ^3^ my weekend was good!! i did alot of hoco prep (which,, i despise) and me and my friend threw a mini party for ourselves to celebrate finishing part of our examines!! we're planning a beach trip later this week too :3 what about you ?? what stuff did you do + have planned for the rest of your week ??

i've been really slow on working on them <//3 but i've finally started writing the selkie shouto for your collab and a coffee shop denki for mine!! i have so little to show for this week </3 but i'll show what i have :3

[yeonjuins]

woo I love and miss you

VIVI )))))): hello my love i lov and miss u as well ;; i have finals coming up so ive been super busy so unfortunately have not been too active on tumblr </3 i hope you've been doing well and taking care of urself my lov i love u sm

[delcakoo]

EMSSS💙 LOVEY HOW ARE YOU?? OMG I MISSED YOU! LIKE IVE BEEN OFF FOR IDK ANYMORE ANYWAY MERRY CHRISTMAS EVE I HOPE YOU SPEND IT WELL WITH YOUR FAMILY OR W URSELF HAPPILYY <3 WELL UH so far i'm not expecting much next year i feel like it will be the same as this year, no better expectations. kinda hope next year is my last. but anyway um i see ure paying attention to txt. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) whos ur biass? mines beomgyu HHAHJAJASHJA just to give u a bit of an update if ure wondering what happened to me and the person i was with, were not talking anymore. it was more like a situationship tbh, we weren't labeled as anything but anyway IM HAPPY NOW. CAUSE I GET TO SPEND IT W JUNGWON. remember how i said i'd go crawling back to him when someone disappoints me? i just did it again LMAO. no ones better than jungwon. im going to my dads side of family AND I HONESTLY DONT WANT TO GO THERE BECAUSE, SOCIALIZING, AND MANY PEOPLE BUT WISH ME LUCK WBEJWBEKWJ. anyway i hope u enjoy ur christmas <33 LOV U AND TAKE CARE. 💙💙

-m💙

MOONIEEEE OMG ITS BENE SO LONG WTF :( YES MERRY CHRISTMAS EVE TO U AS WELL AND U TOO!!

honestly i feel u w that 😭 idk why this year christmas doesnt feel the same?! like idk im just not feeling the holiday spirit 🐸 maybe cuz only like 2 other houses in my neighborhood put up lights 💀💀

YES BRO TXT HAS TAKEN OVER MY LIFE 😞 omg so true gyu bias <3 I AM BEOMJUN BIASED but i honestly love all 5 of them so much bro especially soobs cuz we have the same personality type like we act SO SIMILARLY ITS SCARY ☹️☹️ they are definitely the funniest kpop group i know and that’s saying a lot cuz i’ve had so many different ults 😭 IVE BEEN WATCHING ALL THEIR VARIETY SHOWS AND TO DO SHJDHS MY FAVORITE EPISODE SO FAR IS 72-73 i think? ive been watching completely out of order but ITS THE GARDEN FAIRY TAG GAME AKHSJSBSN IT WAS SO FUNNY

SORRY I GOT CARRIED AWAY W THAT LMDOSHD

and awh im sorry to hear ab that moonie :( im glad ur over it tho BECAUSE YES ALL U NEED IS ME AND JUNGWON TBH!! 🙏😍🧌 WISHING U SO MUCH LUCK AND A VERY NICE CHriSTMAS TOO MOON <3 TAKE CAREEE AND EAT WELL

[un-angel]

70 horrible questions updated

black march 2020, purple november 2022

01 Do you have a good relationship with your parents?

no

no

02 Who did you last say “I love you” to?

sara

izzy

03 Do you regret anything?

there’s one thing i should regret but i’m not sure i do, but apart from that nothing at all

still not sure i regret that same thing i was talking about but i do regret one relationship i had

04 Are you insecure?

hell yeh baby

yeah

05 What is your relationship status?

single

single but married

06 How do you want to die?

on my own terms

and i stand by that!

07 What did you last eat?

a bagel

half a cheese toastie

08 Played any sports?

netball and horseriding played tennis and swam when i was younger too

i joined netball and football at uni idk tho

09 Do you bite your nails?

yes

still yes

10 When was your last physical fight?

never properly only my brother

my brother literally doesnt count ive never fought anyone

11 Do you like someone?

kinda

yes im completely in love with her

12 Have you ever stayed up 48 hours?

ummm i don’t think so

not sure probably not why would i

13 Do you hate anyone at the moment?

yes

no and i havent for a while, no point wasting ur energy hating anyone

14 Do you miss someone?

yes

yep

15 Have any pets?

2 cats jasmine and tiger (my lovs)

still got em

16 How exactly are you feeling at the moment?

struggling

dying

17 Ever made out in the bathroom?

no

yes

18 Are you scared of spiders?

yes

yes

19 Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?

maybe

yes maybe for a day or so

20 Where was the last place you snogged someone?

ewww but a club in bulgaria gag

in my bedroom

21 What are your plans for this weekend?

stay alive and go cycling

stay alive lie in bed

22 Do you want to have kids? How many?

i change my mind everydsy

2 or 3 maybe not sure

23 Do you have piercings? How many?

yes 8

i have 8 but theyre a different 8 from before

24 What is/are/were your best subject(s)?

ummmmmm art english RS chem

why would i ever have written chem? it was art and RS + i’ll let english slide

25 Do you miss anyone from your past?

yes but u don’t get to know who

yeah a little

26 What are you craving right now?

frozen yogurt

oh my god i have literally been craving frozen yoghurt for the past 7 years but i had so much of it this past summer. that will do me for a while.

27 Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

maybe i think so a little

yes

28 Have you ever been cheated on?

i don’t know

girl u were cheated on

29 Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?

yes

yes and now it’s a boyfriend and a girlfriend

30 What’s irritating you right now?

my parents

the love of my life

31 Does somebody love you?

damn i hope so

yes . ur loved dont forget it

32 What is your favourite color?

all of them

still all of them but maybe blue or purple or pink

33 Do you have trust issues?

wirh certain people yes but in general no

im gonna say no but i think im about to develop a few Xx

34 Who/what was your last dream about?

i dreamt we went back to school (nightmare)

i cant remember

35 Who was the last person you cried in front of?

mia

izzy

36 Do you give out second chances too easily?

no

i dont think so

37 Is it easier to forgive or forget?

forgive

literally neither i will never forgive u and i will never forget it fuck u

38 Is this year the best year of your life?

no

maybe

39 How old were you when you had your first kiss?

just turned 15

true story

40 Have you ever walked outside completely naked?

no imagine not being insecure

no!!

51 Favourite food?

my nans lubia polo or my great aunts🤤 or nachos

still probably lubia polo

52 Do you believe everything happens for a reason?

yes

yes but u wont always understand the reason

53 What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?

finished watching finding dory

cried and prayed

54 Is cheating ever okay?

no

still no but i did maybe slip up and i get how it happens but doesnt make it okay.

55 Are you mean?

i don’t know maybe

no!!! but sometimes

56 How many people have you fist fought?

0 sir

0!!

57 Do you believe in true love?

ummmmmmm don’t think so

i wanna say yes i wanna say i know my true love but now im not sure

58 Favourite weather?

when it’s raining but it’s warm

yeh that

59 Do you like the snow?

YES

yes

60 Do you wanna get married?

yes

yes

61 Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?

depends who but yeh

if it’s the loml then yes

62 What makes you happy?

art and animals and my friends

and my love

63 Would you change your name?

not anymore but i used to really really want to

dont think so i would never adjust

64 Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?

yes

the hardest but so so easy at the same time

65 Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

mannnn idk

scream and cry jack get away from me

66 Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?

yes

not sure if we’re there yet

67 Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?

bruce hahahah

rory

68 Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

i can’t remember but probably mia

izzy? been having a lot recently though

69 Do you believe in soulmates?

no

yes i do that was silly. u can have multiple though

70 Is there anyone you would die for?

a lot of people

yes but less than before i think i was just suicidal

[bakedcrispss]

WTF IM JUST SEEING THIS NOW. CONGRATS ON 1K!! THATS SO AMAZING!! YOU DESERVE ALL THE LOVE IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD🥺

Also omg this pairing thing to celebrate seems so fun!! I’d like a TWD ship plzzzz!

Hmm okay I’m 5’5” female, medium/long dark brown hair, light brown eyes. I’m (unfortunately) straight lol I’m also plus size/thiccc/a chunky monkey, whatever you want to call it but I also do kickboxing so don’t mess w me👊🏼 I’m definitely a homebody, but also really good with people (I’ve worked customer service my whole life lmao) I’m very empathetic and a good listener and just want everyone to be happy and loved, god damn it😤 I also give really good hugs — a friend once told me that when I hug him, it feels like he matters and omfg let me tell you I nearly cried right then and there. I guess that’s the gist!

Anywho, CONGRATS ON 1K DARLING. I MISSED YOU💛

OMG BESTIE 🥺🥺 MAKING ME SOFT RN THANK U 🥺💕

I SHIP YOU WITH DARYL DIXON!

okay first of, you and daryl met during a run! obviously with him pointing his crossbow at you and you being in a visibly defensive stance. see, daryl isn't the type to trust so easy, but there's really something about the kind look that your face held that just makes him want to lower his bow and give you a chance. judging by how you carry yourself, he can at least deduce that you have a bit of fight in you. he holds a sense of respect for you, but he probably won't voice that out openly. he's shy.

daryl doesn't give a shit about how your body looks. chubby or not, what matters is that you help provide for the group and that you care for them like your own. he likes you regardless, adores you. seeing how good you are with people really stirs something in him, makes him feel really warm. weird. he also finds it endearing how you constantly dote the group. you always make sure they're well-cared for, and that includes him. he doesn't know why you stick by him twice as much, and he damn near had a heart-attack when you gave him a hug, but he couldn't really hide the fact that he liked it either. the more you do it, the more he warms up to it. he'd probably also hug you back but it will take 15 to 20 business days 👍

he thinks protecting you is important, and he fills in that role. the deeper your connection went, the more he got fiercely protective of you. now, he knows you can handle yourself, and he knows you can throw him to his ass, but that won't stop him from sticking by your side everytime you go outside for a run. you're far too important for him to lose. he's already lost a lot in his life and he can still move past those even with the struggles, but losing you? he isn't risking it. everybody needs you. he needs you. daryl would never give you up for as long as he's living.

[bakatenshii]

Angel!!! First off I wanted to say I absolutely love your writing it’s so poetic and pretty it gets me every single time. You’re so talented and can evoke emotion so easily while making it dreamy and beautiful!

Two: thank u for giving me virgin prince brain rot it’s a thought I never knew I needed to have 💕💕💕😳

Three: Don’t be shy let Yuuta have more than 1.5k he deserves it 😌

AHHH HI BABYYY I can’t lie this ask made my whole day the other day when you sent it! Thank you so so so much for the praise, I’m so flattered and honoured waaaHh TRULY THANK YOUUUUU MY HEART IS SO FULL 。ﾟ(ﾟﾉД｀ﾟ)ﾟ｡♡

two: good. i’m glad hehehehehauhwuhu @tetsou and I have done our jobs to spread da virgin prince agenda HHhhhh thank u for joining us, I’m preparing ur bed down here as we speak

three: I am pleased 2 inform u that we are currently 1.7k in, so REEEEEEE WE SURPASSED THE 1.5K MARK. ur right he does deserve it, he deserves it all. YUUTA DESERVES THE WORLD AND I NEED EVERYONE TO SEE ITTTTT

[sloaaaa]

HEY YOU REMINDER TO DRINK WATER !!! RING RING RING RING !!! THATS UR PHONE RINGING BC ITS 'BELLA MISSES YOU' HOUR

bEA IT'S MIDNIGHT I THINK I WOULD LIKE TO NOT PISS MY BED THANK YOU VERY MUCH

[aleksikesa]

.

[kidfoundonstreets]

thoughts on. saranzu ahhhah

starsd at u with very fertla and rabid eyes ahh eys itst you... its ytou... ive been expevcitng mu... ur the one who saranazued my brain............

HSDFKQWHKFKUQWJ I LOVE THEM I LOV EHTEM BRO OKAY SO SPINSNYNSPINY SPOIGNS AORUND INC HAIR AND THROWSD AHNDS UP ALRIGHT UM tbh when i first got into the fandom1?1?1 i wasa playing and i was like 'holy shit tehy r so cute!! clwon lesbians?!?!?!" and honestly what more could u wnat???? i also found anzu adorable too so finding out they were in a ship my brain literlaly just exploded i adore them and SARAS JUST LIKE

NASFWQKJHQWFQW AND I RELALY LIKED THEM BUT SADLY I DIDNT PAY MUCH ATTNETION TO IT SO i let it be despite me seeing the potential,,,,,,,,,,,,,, THE N HOLY CRAP 3B DTROPPED AND YOUR ART DROPPED AND TUMBLR EXISTED AND I JSUTHYUASHDFKHWQIFDHWQIUHFDQWIHRDHUQWHIUFDH MY GGOD!!! THESE BITCHES GAY!! GOOD FOR THEM!!!! GOOD FOR THEM!!!! GODIDHWEDHQ SUDDENLY MY FONDNESS WENT UP TO 100%% AND I WAS JUST WOAH JESTERS AND SUDDENLY THEM IDK JUST YOUR AU IS SO COOL TOO1?!?!?!? YOUR ART IS THE FIRST THING IN THE FIRST PLACER THAT MADE ME START SHIPPING THEM PROPERLY AGAIN SO THATS SO EPIC AND IM GLAD THAT IT DID BC they r so underrated. my little blorbosbos. i miss them. thank u saraanzu god. i am totlally normal i am having completley non feral thoughts that i can 100%%%%% word 19192831981/10 nankidai why did u just post a marching pride parade

[wonwoonlight]

four seasons | boo seungkwan

➝ Seungkwan x Reader

➝ feat. Chan 

➝ word count: 4590 words. (not including the lyrics)

➝ angst // fluff // post breakup!au 

➝ inspired by: Taeyeon - Four Seasons, Yoon Hyunsang - When Would It Be (the one Seungkwan covered with Soohyun :D), Missing You - BTOB

➝ warning: none that i can think of? 

A/N: hello, guys! been so long since i wrote something that’s not requested hehe. this story is going back and forth bc Seungkwan is reminiscing about his old relationship. also, this is 4k bc i reached 400+ followers T-T thank you for so much!!!!!!!! Didn’t I just reach 300 like 2 weeks ago?? ;-; I also notice there’s a lot of new readers sooo, welcome! and I hope you enjoy my blog ^^ ok anyway ive talked too much and if any of u is still reading til this point, thank u and i lov u HAHAH enjoy! <3

Seungkwan is stuck in a rain near a place full of memory. He doesn’t have much choice than to look for shelter there at the cost of going back to the memory lane he has been trying to avoid.

언제쯤이면 우리 따뜻한 인사와 함께  When would it be okay for us, to greet each other warmly

서로 웃으며 안부를 묻는 그런 사이가 될까  to be able to smile, as we ask about each other?

Seungkwan sniffs slightly and his hands go to bury themselves inside the pockets of his coat. It’s almost winter now, all of the trees he’s passed by have withered and the temperature has been going down more and more as days go by.

A drop of rain falls on his cheek, making Seungkwan blink at the sudden wetness there. He quickens his pace as the rain starts pouring down little by little, his hands are on top of his head to cover him from whatever they manage to cover.

His place is still a little far away and Seungkwan’s sure he’d be drenched even if he somehow gets taxi to return home. Maybe he should go into a nearby café and look for shelter until the rain stops.

He stops in front of a familiar store, hoping the owner won’t mind him standing under their canopy for a while. He shakes the water out of his hair, his fingers roughly trying to dry them even if it’s impossible.

Seungkwan sighs, maybe he shouldn’t have listened to his abrupt whim of wanting to go for a walk earlier. He could’ve been sleeping, but he’s here instead—almost an hour away from his place because his walk has turned a lot far away than he has planned.

Looking up to the café across the street, Seungkwan finally realizes why this store feels familiar to him. How can it not be when he used to come to that café at least once a week just a year ago? He remembers he’d wait for someone by the window seat and he’d go people watching as he waited, making up stories about people that caught his eyes. This particular store used to be his focus as he did so.

He smiles at the way his old seat is already taken by some student, busily typing on his laptop. An assignment, perhaps? Or maybe the guy’s is an employee at some bigshot company, doing his report in the café after meeting with a client.

How long has it been since he last went there? Probably almost a year, he assumes. It was winter then and he had gone there with someone by his side; he smiles bitterly at the memory. Would the old barista—Chan? —still remember him? Does he even still work there? Seungkwan remembers the way the younger guy would sometime talk to him when the store wasn’t that busy. He was a regular after all.

Seungkwan bites his lower lip, the fingers inside his coat balling into fists; should he go there? The rain doesn’t seem like it’s going to stop anytime soon and it’s so much better to wait it out in a café rather than standing here until God knows when.

Fuck it.

He quickly brings the collar of his coat up to shield his head from the rain, ready to run to the café across the street. He’s out of breath once he’s in front of the door, once again shaking his head as an attempt to dry his hair.

Thankfully, Seungkwan isn’t that drenched overall. He’d hate to make trouble for the café workers if he walks in wet from head to toe.

He gulps before he pushes the door, the familiar aroma of coffee greets him along with the warmth from the heater inside the café. Someone greets him a welcome, and he simply nods as he walks to join the short line in front of the cashier.

The café isn’t all that busy, just full enough that it’s not too quiet but not so crowded that the sound of people talking to each other would fill his ears. Seungkwan looks around only to find mostly the café stays the same; he can’t tell if they changed a few decorations here and there, but the atmosphere around him is almost the same as it was a year ago.

He’s not sure if that’s a good thing.

“Hello, how can I help you?” the cashier smiles at him, he reads Jisoo at the nametag. A guy he doesn’t recognize is busily filling up containers on the coffee station, maybe Chan doesn’t work here anymore.

“Umm,” Seungkwan hesitates for a bit. Usually, he’d go with Iced Americano without a second thought, but this isn’t just any other café. Jisoo suggests some menu to him, but Seungkwan isn’t really listening to her. Before he knows it, a familiar menu has made its way to his lips. “Hot mochaccino?”

“Good weather for that,” she smiles at him. “Anything more? Some pastry?”

His eyes glance to the glass shelf, some cakes decorating it from within. “Do you still sell lemon cake?”

“Ah,” Jisoo looks at him with guilt. “We stopped selling those 6 months ago, unfortunately.”

“Ah, I see.” He’s not sure why there’s a pang of disappointment in his chest, but he quickly pushes it away as he gets his wallet out to pay. “I’ll just have the chocolate croissant then.”

Jisoo goes on to total his order, taking his card as she speaks to him to fill the silence. “A lot of people have been asking for that cake these days. Maybe I can try asking to make it a special menu or something.”

Someone goes pass Seungkwan’s mind, maybe…?

“Here’s your card. Your order will be ready in a while,” she cuts off his train of thought with a smile and Seungkwan smiles back at her.

A few minutes later, Seungkwan is sitting on the corner of the café as he waits for his order. He sighs again as everything around him reminds him of someone he has forced himself to forget. Yet, today, at this very place, he doesn’t have it in him to push the thought away.

One day should be fine, right?

Spring.

“Are you taking a picture of me?” you turned to Seungkwan, glaring at his phone.

He just grinned at you as he raised his phone, now shamelessly taking more pictures of you.

You both were out on an impromptu picnic; the weather had turned quite nice after so many rains and Seungkwan had showed up in front of your door unannounced. You would’ve said no if he was someone else because you’re not into unplanned outings.

But it’s Seungkwan and he knew you were just busy laying around on your bed. You had tried to pull him in to join your laying session, but Seungkwan insisted you needed some sunshine and he had bought some food for the little picnic.

“Why couldn’t you just ask me if you can take a picture like a normal person?” you pouted as you try to cover the camera at the back of his phone.

“Where’s the fun in that? Plus, I was just trying to take a candid picture of you,” he answered back, instead taking your hand to pull you towards him and making you stumble clumsily into his lap. He simply laughed at that, placing his chin on top of your head before he turned the camera into a selfie mode. “Smile.”

Seungkwan didn’t even count, simply clicked the button repeatedly as you made faces to the camera.

After a while, you fixed your position so you could sit straight, covering Seungkwan from the camera view. He simply pulled you back to him, your back meeting his chest as you laughed at his annoyed expression.

When you finally settled comfortably against his chest, Seungkwan put out his phone again. “Let’s take a proper picture for once, okay?”

“Is it my fault that you’re always making funny poses?” you snickered at him, though you couldn’t help the blush that’s making its way to your cheeks as Seungkwan placed his chin on your shoulder.

“That’s why I said let’s take a proper picture for once, didn’t I?” he replied, satisfied at your silence in return.

Like earlier, Seungkwan didn’t count, simply clicked through as you both changed poses whenever you wanted. You tilted your head to the side, colliding into his head hardly as you grinned at the camera despite the slight throbbing feeling on the side of your head.

Seungkwan grimaced at the sudden force, glaring at you as you simply laughed at his reaction.

He didn’t notice until hours later that he had captured that very moment by accident. Your fingers were a little bit blurry because you were moving and his face was barely visible because he was busy whining to you.

Yet, Seungkwan still thinks it’s the most beautiful picture he has ever captured of you and him and the picture refuses to move from his lockscreen.

“Here’s your ord—oh?”

“Oh, hi Chan,” Seungkwan greets the familiar guy in surprise, getting pulled out of the memory.

“Hi, it’s been so long since you visit,” he grins as he sets down the hot beverage and a plate of croissant. “Don’t think I’ve ever seen you with a warm drink before.”

He smiles awkwardly, praying Chan doesn’t notice this is your usual drink to go, not his. “It’s raining.”

“Yeah, don’t think it’ll stop anytime soon,” he follows Seungkwan’s gaze to the window, the rain just seems to fall harder as time goes by. “Catch up to you later if you’re still here?”

Seungkwan nods awkwardly, hopefully Chan wouldn’t ask anything about you. He doesn’t even know if you still visit this café or not.

After Chan leaves, Seungkwan simply stares at the drink in front of him. He smiles at the way his hands get warm once he wraps his fingers around the mug.

He wonders if you still order this drink when you’re having a bad day.

Summer.

“You’re going to catch a cold from the amount of Iced Americano you drink basically everyday,” you nagged him as you glared at the cold coffee in his hand.

“It’s literally summer,” Seungkwan rolled his eyes before noisily slurped the drink right next to your ear to bother you. “Plus, catching a cold isn’t related to my drink unless I drink from the glass of someone who has caught a cold.”

“Well, you could’ve ordered anything else than caffeine,” you stubbornly said. To be completely honest, you’re just worried Seungkwan had been consuming too much caffeine these days. He had told you he needed to stay up late these days because of an upcoming event at work, which was why he’d been fueled by mostly coffee when he’s awake.

Yet, when he didn’t even need to drink one, he’s still ordering his usual Iced Americano.

“Why do you hate my coffee so much?” he pouted.

You had always been more of a chocolate drinker, rarely drinking coffee unless you felt like so. Ironically, your comfort drink was mochaccino. You had insisted it’s because it tasted a lot like dark chocolate, but deep down you knew it’s not about that.

Seungkwan had forced you to try ordering coffee once when you’re out on a date with him, he’d told you you’re missing out from other flavours because you always either ordered chamomile tea or dark chocolate. So, you just asked him which coffee had chocolate in it and ordered it to stop Seungkwan from talking your ears off. Since then, you always came back to the drink when you needed a cheer up.

It was never about the taste, though.

It was the way Seungkwan looked at you expectantly, hoping you’d like it with all his heart. It was the way he excitedly asked if it tasted good, and the way he pumped his fist under the table when you told him it tasted much better than you had expected.

It was the way his whole face light up when you ordered it again the second time.

“Anyway, it’s you who’s weird, drinking warm mochaccino when it’s, like, 38 degrees outside,” he had said nonchalantly before immediately stopping in his track. “Wait, are you upset? Is this, like, a sign that I have missed for the last 30 minutes since you ordered that drink?”

You just shook your head, drinking the last of your drink before making your way to throw away the paper cup on the trash bin. “Yes, upset because of you.”

Seungkwan turned to you in alarm, quickly blocking your path and you just looked at him pointedly.

“Is this really because of my drink?”

“Yes.”

“For real?”

“Yes.”

He frowns and you took that moment to continue walking, Seungkwan caught up to you in mere seconds, blocking your path again. “Do you want me to stop drinking this?”

It was kind of amusing the way Seungkwan was asking you seriously, his eyebrows were furrowed in concern and his hand that wasn’t holding his drink went up to your shoulder.

“I just think you’ve been having too much caffeine these days, Kwan,” you sighed. “I know you need coffee because you’re barely awake without them, but today’s not your working day so what’s the reason for ordering this stuff?”

“I’m just too used to ordering this, sorry,” he told you, his hand went up from your shoulder to caress your cheek gently. He understood where you’re coming from, only now feeling guilty for not realizing sooner. “I’ll just finish this and try not to drink it for the rest of the month unless I really need it, okay?”

At your nod, Seungkwan leaned forward to pull you into a hug before planting a soft kiss on the side of your head. The both of you stayed like that for a few moment, enjoying each other’s warmth even though it wasn’t exactly cuddling weather outside.

“You’re drinking the coffee because you’re sleepy, aren’t you?” you muttered after a while, your chin resting on his shoulder.

Seungkwan didn’t say anything and you took his silence as a confirmation. “You could’ve just told me you don’t feel like going outside today, Kwan. We’ve been dating for almost two years now and you’re still reluctant to tell me these things?”

He smiled at you guiltily when you pulled back to see his face. “It’s just that… It’s been a while since we went out. I wanted to walk around with you.”

“How are you going to enjoy your walk if you’re barely even awake?” you asked him softly, it’s your turn to caress his cheek and Seungkwan immediately leaned into your comforting touch. “Let’s go home and take a nap?”

Seungkwan nodded in agreement; how did he get so lucky with you by his side?

Seungkwan perks up at the sound of the door opening, blinking back to reality. He can see a girl coming inside the café in a hurry, her hair is wet but thankfully everything else is dry enough not to make a mess in the café.

She looks at Chan apologetically for the little mess she’s making, little drops of water following her steps as she makes her way to order something.

Chan catches his eyes, and Seungkwan just smiles in encouragement. He doesn’t look annoyed, though, just tired and somewhat pitiful to the girl.

Seungkwan’s not sure if it’s the café or the rain outside, but even that short interaction he’s just witnessed reminds him of you.

Isn’t that how his first meeting with you went?

Autumun.

“Oh my God,” the girl in front of him exclaimed with panic as she bumped into him, her drink leaving a big mark on his beige hoodie. It was clear to him that she genuinely felt bad as she quickly took some napkins for him. “I’m so so so sorry, oh my God, are you in hurry? Please let me wash your hoodie? Or I can give you the money for laundry. Gosh, I’m sorry I wasn’t looking.”

Seungkwan had just laughed in disbelief, the odds had been against him since the moment he woke up that day and he couldn’t believe it actually carried on until now. At least the drink wasn’t hot, Seungkwan thought to himself as he took the napkin from you.

(And at least you looked cute as you rambled in worry, but Seungkwan would never tell you that.)

“It’s okay,” he sighed at last and you looked at him apologetically. “It’s been a bad day for me since morning. Should’ve known it’d last until this day ended.”

The waiter came to help clean up the mess you had made on the floor. Seungkwan heard you apologize profusely to the point where the waiter felt bad.

“Let me buy your order? You haven’t ordered, right?” you turned to him, there’s a worried frown in your face.

Seungkwan shook his head, he had accepted that it was just meant to be a bad day for him; there’s no need in blaming you, of all people. “It’s okay. My fault too for not looking.”

“No, please?” you insisted, guilt eating you inside out for the poor guy. “For my conscience, at least? Or consider this a treat from a stranger in midst of your bad day?”

Seungkwan raised his brow in amusement. “From a stranger that spilled her own drink on me?”

“…I’m sorry?”

He laughed again at your unsure tone, finally agreeing on the deal because you did look like you’d be too stubborn to take his no. Funny, if that he thought about it. Wasn’t it him who was supposed to be the stubborn one in this situation?

“Okay, I’ll just get an Iced Americano, then,” he told you. “I’m just gonna go to the rest room to take this hoodie off, okay?”

You nodded as you gave him an ‘Ok’, telling him you’d be here waiting for your drink and his.

An hour later, Seungkwan was still sitting on that same café with you; talking about this and that—stuffs like his dream travel location, or that annoying Professor from his Calculus class, stuffs that he had never really imagined sharing with a stranger at once.

When you finally looked at your watch and realized it was time to leave because you had promised meeting with your friend (Mingyu, Seungkwan remembers. The tall, clumsy guy whose adventures of breaking glasses he had found out from that first meeting with you—way before he eventually met the guy two months later), you had been there talking to him for at least two hours.

You quickly picked your stuffs up, apologizing again to Seungkwan and leaving the waiter some tip for the mess you made earlier.

He forgot to ask for your number, but he guessed it wasn’t a bad day, after all.

The next time he came into that café in hope of catching you again, you had been there, playing with your phone as you waited for your drink. Seungkwan was wondering how to greet you when it was you who looked up and happily called his name.

He didn’t forget to ask for your number this time, and when Chan went to give you your order, he jokingly told you not to spill it on Seungkwan again.

Seungkwan blinks as he slurps into nothing. He glances down only to find the mug already empty—when did he even drink it all?

He looks out of the window; the rain is still falling though it’s definitely not hard enough if he wants to run through it. Maybe he’ll wait thirty minutes more and if it still doesn’t stop, he’ll just go do that.

Being in this café after so long feels bizarre, he’s both eager and reluctant to leave. If he’s being honest, Seungkwan’s still trying his best not to think about you even up until today. Which means this café is actually not good for that purpose because this place just screams you, pulling him in and out of memories when he’s only been there for roughly an hour.

It would be a lie to say he’s still struggling to go through his days because he’s not—not anymore, at least. Right now, he’s getting by even though that’s about it. For Seungkwan, that is enough. Because if he’s being completely honest, he’s not sure he wants to move on.

Truth is, he’s already used to being by himself, waves of emptiness coming every now and then, and the thought of you haunting him from time to time. Sometimes you pop into his mind when he’s not busy enough, or at days when he’s tired and he’s alone in his room at ungodly hours, or when he passes by the shops he used to go with you, or when he catches the sight of your favorite singers on YouTube. There are quite a lot, if he wants to mention them all.

But Seungkwan has accepted it.

He doesn’t know how you’re doing now except for the few updates he catches from Mingyu’s Instagram story. You haven’t blocked him anywhere, but Seungkwan’s not sure if you just don’t use your account anymore, or if you hide him so he can’t see your updates.

Seungkwan nips at his lip, how did it come to this?

Winter.

“I’m sorry,” you bit back a sob. “I’m sorry, I can’t do this anymore, Seungkwan.”

He looked at you in disbelief, his eyes were also blurry from the tears he’s trying to hold back. “What are you saying? Where did this even come from?”

There’s a bitter smile in your face as another tear stubbornly fell down your face. He wanted to shake you, asked what prompted that smile and what could possibly run through your mind that it had come to this.

Weren’t you both happy? Didn’t you promise to go on a holiday to Jeju next year with him? Weren’t you dropping hints about moving in together just a few months ago? Where did it go wrong?

“I don’t know what to say anymore, Kwan,” you said weakly as your hand went up to wipe the tears yourself. He itched so bad to pry your fingers off, to wipe them himself and just pull you to his embrace like he usually did when you’re crying. But the distance between the two of you suddenly felt too far, you suddenly felt too far, way out of his reach.

“What do you mean you don’t know what to say?” He blinked back his tears angrily. “Tell me what went wrong so I’d understand. Why would you think I’d be okay with you wanting to break up out of nowhere?”

“It’s not out of nowhere,” your voice was so small, barely audible and Seungkwan caught almost nothing.

“Why won’t you tell—”

“I said it’s not out of nowhere!” you raised your voice a little, he could see you gulping hardly after that, your hands were balled into fist to keep yourself together. “You don’t even know what went wrong, Kwan. That’s the problem.”

“How am I supposed to know if you don’t tell me?!”

“I did!” you finally looked at him, your lips were trembling and you looked away to wipe the tears before meeting his eyes again. “I did, so many times.”

There’s something stabbing his heart at the way your voice got smaller, at the way your eyes looked exhausted and the way you’re trying your best to be calm. It was never supposed to be like this. You were supposed to be each other’s comfort, each other’s home when things got rough and you needed to rest.

“I’ve told you so many times, Kwan,” you let out another sob. “Told you that you’re getting further from me the past few months, that I felt like you didn’t want to be with me anymore, that… that I felt more alone when I’m with you than when I’m not.”

Seungkwan had never seen you so small before, had never witnessed you break down because of him, and he’s pretty sure he’d have the image of you crying to yourself in front of him as you tried your best not to sob in his mind for the rest of his life.

He’d never forget the way your body shook from crying, the way you shook your head when he tried to move closer to you.

So, when you muttered those words that pierced through his heart once again, when you weakly whispered you can’t do it anymore, he couldn’t do anything but accept your goodbye.

Seungkwan sighs at the memory, rubbing his face with his palms as the sound of your cries rings through his ears once again. Has it really been barely a year since then?

He tends to look back at the weeks—months proceeding to the break up every now and then, the way he’s too caught up with work because he was aiming for that promotion. He didn’t think it was that bad, simply thought you’d understand that he’s always been ambitious with everything that he does.

And you did understand. Seungkwan realizes much later that what eventually breaks you two apart isn’t the fact that he’s too busy with work; it’s the fact that he hadn’t been listening to you and taking you for granted.

He has thought it was a given that he wants to be with you, even the thought that drove him for that promotion was so he could get a bigger place so you both could move in together and maybe adopt a dog or two. He still remembers the way you say you’ve always wanted a dog, but never managed to get one because your place didn’t allow pets.

But if he really looks into it, he can see that he didn’t appreciate your presence enough during the last few months of your relationship. He didn’t cherish you enough and yet he thought it was clear to you that he loved you with every fiber of his being.

That was on him. The fact that the memory still stings is totally on him.

He leans back on his seat after a while, the trip down the memory lane has been more exhausting than he thought it would.

He’s still uncertain if going to this café is a good thing or not because everything reminds him of you now. Even the random guy two tables away from his who’s wearing a Slytherin sweater similar to yours, even the girl whose back is turned to him because her hair is short and you’ve always said you want to try short hair but too afraid it won’t fit you, and even Chan who’s wiping the table, simply doing his job.

At least he knows this part of his relationship stays the same and it’s good to meet a familiar face after so long. Maybe he should visit from time to time for old time’s sake.

The rain has stopped now, he notices. It’s passed the thirty minutes he has decided earlier but it’s finally time to go home. He’d need to dive himself in the bath once he gets home, hoping it’ll help him relax even a little.

As he gets up to walk to the door, he sees the short-haired girl from earlier struggling to open it because her hands are full with drinks and a paper bag with what he assumes to be filled pastries.

Her hair catches his attention again and Seungkwan smiles at the random memory, he shakes his head and quickly moves to help the stranger. He pulls the door open, a smile ready on his face until his mouth opens in surprise when the stranger turns to thank him.

“Thank y—Oh,” you blink at him, your throat suddenly tightens at the sight of Seungkwan after so long. “H—Hi, Seungkwan.”

A/N: how was that? hehehe your feedback would be much appreciated <3 i have never written a long one for seungkwan so i was both excited and nervous 🙈

[lovingnekoma]

i’ve been meaning to do another 18+ & dc haikyuu/bnha/jjk blogs i love post but haven’t had the time so uhhhh here are some real quick (repetitive of my last post but i love these blogs ok bls let me love you) (but issokie if you don’t wanna let me lov you too that’s so valid you’re so valid)

reminder to read each blog’s dni/byf before you interact or follow!! everyone has different things they’re comfortable with, and all of these people should be respected!!!

MINORS DNI

@sugardaddykenma always my top rec for a blog. lin, i’d die for you. someone give her the fucking crown she deserves. not the burger king one, but also that. the funniest person on this hellsite and 100% one of my fav blogs ever.

@atsumuse once again, i present: mimi. a literal goddess. follow her so you, too, can have an insanely high laundry bill bc her writing will make you gush. <3

@samuslut literally so chill n so nice??? her writing makes me take fucking laps, it never misses and i could exist in her masterlists forever

@iwaasfairy if you wanted meian shugo content, fairy’s blog is the place. i constantly reread all her writing and she is the nicest person ever, i adore her.

@inarizahki sunny’s writing is so good??? the kita content fuels my whole existence and her vibes are immaculate. follow 4 good timez. her and her anons have fucking massive brains.

@aiiwa NONA MY BELOVED <33 her anime boyfriend scenarios make me scream into my pillow and she has the coolest themes ever and her writing her wRITING

@devilkou eden literally never fucking misses. i always resist mass liking/reblogging everything on her blog and she also has the cutest themes n masterlists ok just follow n adore her thats an order

@introloves i scream into the void everytime jax posts bc her writing?? fucking slaps so hard???? also such fun vibes n cute rainbow dividers. if you aren’t consistently reblogging her work, what’re you doing

@yourtamaki god-tier writing. i read one (1) drabble, read the dni/byf (do that. for everyone. yes thank u) and then followed i’m in lOVE. everytime ive been like i wanna read this specific thing, sunny has been 7 lightyears ahead and blessed this cesspool of a site.

@ringpop-poppy kneel for an icon!!! her brain!!! is gorgeous!!!! thirst posts that send me running to fill up my water bottle and just very great interactions w anons !!!

@keishinslove if you have not experienced the feeling of seeing carter on your dash and getting annihilated by her big fucking brain, you need to. her writing makes me slkfskjdfs <33 in best way

@sleepyrintaro ok rinnie is currently on hiatus but bls go check out her blog anyway. her headcanons are so so fucking good and she makes the cutest dividers and her vibe’s brilliant idk what more you need